Hello, one and all!
Welcome back to another thrilling episode
of "Dimension 20: City Council of Darkness."
I'm your humble dungeon master, Brennan Lee Mulligan.
With me as always are our intrepid heroes.
Say hi, Intrepid Heroes.
Die, Intrepid Heroes!
Last we left off, this sinister small-town coterie
had gotten together their new tasks,
saying to hell with this edict from the Camarilla.
We have our own aims for the town of Purpee.
We don't want to repel the lupines,
we want to embrace 'em.
We want Nancy Danderhoof to get a goddamn Pulitzer
and we want to run shit.
We saw the beginning of a very heavy downtime segment
opposing the Douglases,
the Whittakers, perhaps even the Camarilla itself
through the auspices of Metr Industries.
And the hit piece on Florian Whittaker came out
slightly altered by the intercession of one Maya Jayashtri,
our local food co-op witch.
You had no right to do that.
Get her.
We return to resolve the enormous successes
of the beginning of your first new year in Purpee,
post New Year's.
And I'm gonna start with our biggest success first,
which was, I believe, was it a Charisma, Leadership or-
This was Intelligence, Leadership.
Intelligence, Leadership,
and this was Charisma, Persuasion?
Manipulation, Finance.
With 21 successes,
I want you guys to set the scene for me
on how we approach Patty Babcock.
- What- - Tiny steps.
Tiny steps.
Really small steps.
Leading up to this meeting-
So Wanda.
Through Tyler, we have established an LLC with the state,
known as Skate Free Purpee.
Mm-mmm.
Free Skate of Purpee.
- Free Skate- - Darkness Man
is running to try to stop you from naming it that.
But he's here.
At this point, you're here.
We've established an LLC called Free Skate of Purpee
that is dedicated to the growth
and expansion of independent skating in Purpee.
It is vaguely Christian.
Keep kids off the streets and in the skate parks.
Amen, brother.
We have drawn up, in the many blueprints we have
of the lumbermill,
a world in which there is a half pipe there.
And we have those plans
- and that groundwork. - A line
of skate apparel and skateboards
that all need art designed for it,
and we need a lead designer.
Yes, we do.
So you get Tyler to set up a meeting.
Where do you want him to set up this meeting?
Where do you want to meet?
Fucking park.
Yeah, we'll meet at the park.
The defunct park?
Yeah, we'll meet at the defunct park.
You guys wanna make this 21 successes
easier for me or harder for me?
I mean, where else would we go?
Like a restaurant?
You own multiple properties.
Let's go to the-
Didn't we say we'd put a skate park in-
Just go there.
No, defunct park.
No, we'll meet at the lumbermill.
You know it!
You don't think that's exactly how the scene ends,
you're fuckin' crazy.
You haven't learned a single thing.
I have to stop letting you guys roll
before we do the scene.
That's really where I'm getting lost out here.
You guys know it's too funny
when I have to let it succeed.
We are at the lumbermill, and we got it catered
and it's tartare cones.
Oh, beautiful.
Every skater wants tartare.
Every independent skater.
Do one focus group with a skater.
Tacos and tartare cones.
We've got two food trucks there.
Two food trucks waiting at the lumbermill.
You guys get there that evening. Tyler is there.
See, Tyler's got the clipboard.
He's worked out the food trucks.
He's got the candles going in Elysium once again.
The lumbermill is all set up.
HJ is wearing Heelys.
HJ's got Heelys on.
So you see that Tyler...
You can see, by the way,
that Tyler looks extremely anemic and skinny.
His hairline is starting to recede a little bit.
But you see he comes over and says, "All right.
Right this way. Let's do it."
Hey Tyler, are you doing all right, man?
Yeah, doing great.
Hey, are you sleeping?
- Are you eating? - Grind it.
- Grinding? - Grind it.
Grind ay?
Grind it.
Can I pull HJ aside real quick?
HJ, I'm thinking we ghoul him.
What if we ghouled him?
It'd be fun to have another ghoul.
That's so smart.
He would... He looks worse than a ghoul right now.
We'd be helping him up.
Big time.
Let's ask, obviously we both gotta ask him.
Tyler, quick sidebar before we get in there.
Yeah, you got it.
This is gonna be a lot, but you can handle it.
Yeah, you got it.
- Is that an inhaler? - Is that kratom?
Yeah. What's that?
Yeah, but it's not for asthma.
I'm not sick. It's for- it's speed.
- Yeah, 100%. - Yeah. Yeah.
Would you be interested in a different kind of speed?
A special kind of speed,
a speed that's only for the elite, the 1%.
It's called ketamine.
Count me in. I'll do ketamine.
Okay, so imagine a lifelong ketamine.
We want to
- invite you in. - HJ, real quick,
pull aside, pull aside.
Ghouling him is he's just gonna drink our blood.
We're not gonna do the full all the way down,
all the way back up sort of thing.
We drink his blood, you mean?
No, no. We give him our blood
and it makes him strong and powerful.
Duh.
So what question do you have for me?
You said you wanted to double-check with him.
Duh.
You think I didn't read the book?
Okay, we're on the same page.
You think
- I didn't read the book? - Tyler, what's up?
We want to give you the greatest drug known to man.
And if you're in, we're in.
Wherever you go, I follow.
Wherever you lead, I'm there.
I'm gonna cut my hand.
Drink deep, brother.
"You got it."
And he goes right in.
Literally no reaction.
There's nothing you could-
But you see, when it hits the back of his throat,
his pupils dilate, and that's when he reacts.
You realize that he still thinks you're a man.
He still thinks you're a human man.
He doesn't understand what's happening.
He thinks this is Skull and Bones or something,
but as he starts to drink it,
he kind of can't stop, and he's like-
Whoa, whoa, there brother. Whoa, there.
It's your first time.
Now here's the thing.
I take so much of the drug that if you drink my blood,
you get to take the drug as well.
This is like what happens at Harvard.
This is very much like what happens at Harvard.
Neither one of us went there, but we learned from the best.
Yeah, well check it out.
Anyone can get into Skull and Bones if you're at Harvard.
I got into Skull and Bones at Purpee State University,
so what's up, bitch?
- That's great. - "Ha!"
And you see that he punches partially through
a brick wall and goes, "Shit!"
I use my cane
and I punch through the rest of the wall with him.
I'm so fucking strong.
Hell yeah, man. King shit.
Let's go crush a meeting.
You got it. I'm gonna go get Patty.
Eat a sandwich.
You see that he just houses a sandwich
from one of the food trucks and looks out and goes,
"Fuck, I feel awesome!"
Hey, that was a good call. He deserves it.
Boy works hard.
He deserves it.
He walks in moments later with Patty Babcock,
and you see, he walks up and says,
"Mr. Babcock, I'm sure you're acquainted.
Mr. Worthy, Mr. Wingstreet."
He walks in, looking around,
you see he's got some tacos in his hands.
And he goes, "Oh, it's you guys. Hey, what's up?"
Hey! I run, hit the Heelys,
and try to do a little jump.
- 21, right? - You guys are gonna fuck me.
You guys are planning on fucking me in this scene.
I hate this.
I mean, the roll's been done. HJ-
The pantomiming of walking into hitting the Heelys.
Here's the thing,
I did you guys a favor
by letting us roll before so that I don't have you do
an Oscar-winning scene and then fail.
I was like, "That feels bad
if they do something really awesome and then fail."
But I am learning my lesson
and we will be reverting after this.
Let's be clear.
"The Shape of Water" has an Oscar,
and we're about to win ours.
- Yes. - Incredible.
All right, so you see Tyler gestures to his seat
and he goes-
Mad respect.
"Yeah. What's up?"
Tyler says, he says,
"Mr. Babcock would like anything else to drink,
an energy drink or some coffee, some herbal tea?"
See Patty goes, "I'm good, man."
Tyler goes, "You got it.
I'll be waiting outside if you gentlemen need me."
And he leaps 30 feet straight in the air
onto one of the catwalks and sprints,
"Naruto" running outta the building.
Patty, what's going on, man?
What the fuck?
What's going on, dude?
- How are you? - What's going on?
It's great to see you.
It's been a minute. Since Christmas, right?
Yeah dude, you don't want some schnapps?
We got schnapps.
This guy loves schnapps.
No, I'm good. I'm good, man.
I got the, I got the...
Tyler sent me an email saying that you guys were...
this was about graphic design or something?
Oh yeah, man.
I'm graduating in May with a graphic design degree, so.
We thought of you first.
We may not have come across it before,
but it seems like there's no skate park in Purpee.
It's a skate free Purpee.
Have we talked about how much we love skateboarding?
I hit...
I try to hit it
and then jump so that I'm going backwards.
But it's Heelys, so I fall.
Incredible.
Have we talked about how much we love skateboarding?
I'm on the ground.
Old man busting ass on Heelys.
I think that's what we first talked about.
21.
How much we love skating!
This is the biggest success in this season.
We've ever had.
He looks...
I'm waiting for someone to help me up.
Taco tico.
You guys hadn't mentioned to me.
You guys hadn't verbally mentioned to me
how much you love skating.
Holy shit.
We didn't talk about that?
Do you like to skateboard?
Yeah.
Oh my god.
We absolutely love skateboarding,
but not that kind of Tony Hawk bullshit, you know?
- The real stuff. - We're in-
Why do you think he won't like Tony Hawk?
Not that bitch-ass Tony Hawk.
We're, like, realistic.
Yeah, we don't do that X Games bullshit, you know?
What are the X Games?
- X Games? - What are the X Games?
Yeah, exactly.
I'm 21.
Yeah, man.
It's like an old thing.
I slide over a contract for $400,000.
We want you to be the graphic designer
for our new initiative.
And we've been working on the name. We're not so sure of it.
- Yeah. - It's called-
It's called Free-
- I'm here. - It's called-
It's called-
It's called Free Skate of Purpee.
Kinda like the Matthew McConaughey movie,
"Free State of Jones."
Yeah. This is Free Skate of Purpee.
We just don't have...
If there's a better, more kind of name.
Yeah.
Anyway, we're kinda getting into it
because we wanna bring independent skating to Purpee
and we
need someone's help.
- We need a lead designer. - Yeah.
- We thought of you. - Yeah.
It was just kinda hard
to find any real skaters in this town.
Sorry, is this a contract for $400,000?
- You'd be the lead designer. - Yeah.
On a for-profit company.
On a whole, yeah, skate park, merch, boards.
We're interviewing a few other people, too.
A couple of Apple guys.
People who worked at Apple, people who worked at-
Okay, so do you want me to submit a portfolio
or is this like an-
Start with signing the contract.
Here's the thing.
I do actually think it's realistic
for a 21-year-old to look at a contract for $400,000,
and he goes, "Can I show this to anybody first or?"
100%. Do you need a lawyer?
We've got a guy, if you need help.
Yeah, I don't have a lawyer.
- I would love- - Oh yeah,
I can connect you with a lawyer.
Same guy who drew up the contract.
He can walk you through it.
He's great.
They say kind of
if you keep it all in one house, that's for the best.
He wrote it, he can look at it.
I'm so excited.
I'm so excited to get to work.
I have so many, I have so many...
Listen, the guy,
because I talked to you about the guys at Outer Ridge.
- Of course. - If this is
the kinda money you're throwing around,
but is this something that I could do remotely
or is this something that would be-
Unfortunately, we're looking for a local.
We need someone who knows Purpee.
We need somebody, 'cause we are trying
to build skate up here.
Yeah.
Build indie skate here.
We gotta free this skate of Purpee.
Great.
Well that's awesome.
I'll do that.
Yeah, man.
I mean, I'll literally like,
I'll send this to the lawyer and
if they give thumbs-up, then I'm signing.
Literally, I'm ready.
And the last thing I want to be
is a stumbling block.
God, this is really... Sorry.
What's going on, man?
This is just life-changing money.
I mean, this is really life-changing money.
Like, I don't come from a rich family
or any- Like, this is just really life-changing money.
- Dude, when we first met you- - Yep.
- ...and your dog, Bingo- - Yeah.
...we knew you were special.
We still think Bingo should run.
- For real? - For real.
For real, man.
I think you'd do a great job
and if you had a solid source of income,
then you wouldn't have to really worry about
all that other stuff.
Yeah, man. It's mostly Instagram stuff.
Honestly, that might... I mean, 400K becomes 600K like that.
Yeah. Just ask the lawyer.
Oh, you guys want Bingo to... Okay, yeah.
I mean, if you wanted to be the new Tina Bunders.
She makes around that, I think.
I think so. Something like that.
Do you? Yeah, Bingo...
Like, honestly, whatever you guys... If Bingo should be the-
Would he be like the mascot for the company or something?
No no, I think he'd be the mayor for the town.
I think he would be the mayor.
We don't want to strong-arm you.
So you just,
you just make up your own mind.
But there's six figures that start
with a six in it for you.
I'm so honored and grateful.
And, and I like,
I know that Bingo's very popular,
and you guys obviously have stuff you wanna do in the town,
but it's like, yeah, if you want, if we should run Bingo
for mayor, fuck it, fuck it, right?
Fuck it.
Holy shit, are we fucking it?
Are we fucking it?
It sounds like two birds, one stone.
Incredible mayor for the town,
and incredible new designer for all of the boards
and shirts and-
Yeah, everything.
Everything. Yeah.
Hell yeah. I love it.
I love it.
Great. Done deal.
Well here's our lawyer's number.
I'll write it on the contract for you.
And you give him a call, see what he thinks of the contract.
Yeah.
- That he wrote. - Great.
And you get back to us.
I'll get back to you guys.
You're not gonna regret it. Thank you so much.
- Yeah, of course man. - Thank you so much.
You wanna hang out?
Sure. Yeah.
Cool.
Tyler?
Tyler!
- What's up? - Wow.
Can we get another round of tacos?
You got it. Coming right up.
And a little champagne.
Ooh.
I like what you're thinking. I like that.
Tacos and champagne.
You see Tyler goes, "We got it."
And you see he bends down to Patty and says,
"From Champagne, France.
Real deal."
And you see, he walks away and-
- Welcome to the company. - We're together, baby.
Patty's just there in his cargo shorts
and his hoodie just so fucking psyched.
- That's awesome. - He's like, "Yeah.
So, like, what kind of vibe?
Like in terms of skate crews
are you seeing? What do we want do?"
Dude, we're all about independent, Purpee-based skating.
Yeah, and that Matthew McConaughey movie
is like from the Civil War, right?
Yeah.
Well, it's crazy.
Do you have any ideas for a more Purpee name?
Like something that really brings in the town?
We broke Ally.
They're done.
Stick a fork in them.
And I haven't seen it, but that's so funny.
Yeah. It's like, I'm pretty sure-
If there's a more Purpee name than-
It's about, I think it's about,
it's about the guy,
the guy Jones, the character,
he's a southern unionist.
No, no, no. He's actually Confederate.
He's a Confederate, but then he rebels
against the Confederacy because he doesn't like the war.
And in rebelling against the Confederacy,
he joins with the slaves.
And in working with the slaves, he repels the South.
So maybe it's like,
maybe it's like rebel,
like Rebel Purpee, Purpee Rebel.
Or maybe it's like-
How'd you do that?
- Holy fuck. - That's such a good name.
Rebel Purpee.
We will change it tomorrow.
We'll change it tomorrow.
Rebel Purpee.
I mean you've already... Look at you.
It's like, yeah.
Like, it's literally we're sticking out 'cause like, "Obey,"
and this is like, "Don't."
- Rebel. - Wow.
Rebel.
Holy fuck. We found the right guy, dude.
We found the right guy. Shot caller!
He starts crying hard.
And you see Tyler starts massaging his back
and he's like, "This is your future.
Remember this moment when the,
remember this moment when the ask comes.
Remember this moment and how good it felt."
He gives you a big thumbs-up, HJ.
Hell yeah.
Well, I'm gonna put on some Sum 41
and I think we just kinda hang.
♪ 'Cause I'm in too deep ♪
Great. Check that-
Check that off.
Text the thread: "Dog acquired."
And text Darkness Man separately.
"The name was changed. It's now Rebel Purpee."
Where is Darkness Man?
Yeah, we can tell your bounding.
- I'm here. - Bounding, bounding.
You've covered a lot of ground.
Yeah.
That was the scariest conversation
I've ever seen in my life.
I died when you Heely'd backwards
and intentionally fell.
If this happened when I was 21, I'd be like,
"These guys are gonna kill me."
I know they're not ripping him off,
but this does feel like he's getting ripped off.
Hey, it's all good, dude.
He's gonna talk to the lawyer.
The lawyer who wrote the contract.
I'm meeting in a sawmill
where for some reason they've hired two food trucks
just for me.
I'm gonna be ritualistically killed.
I'm gonna be killed in a ritual.
Walking in, holding the tacos into an open space
filled with no one except for the two of us.
Three $4,000 leather sofas
arranged in an abandoned lumbermill covered in lit candles.
Lit candles and red silk hanging.
- Red silk. - So much Supreme shit.
Half a million dollars worth of Supreme.
I'm wearing just an ill-fitted
Supreme sweatsuit going, "What's up?"
I'm in a gorgeous three-piece suit,
but I am wearing Heelys.
And the Supreme on the back of your three-piece suit.
Yeah, yeah.
It wasn't David Byrne, but it feels like could be.
Yeah, yeah. A massive suit.
I think, Bat Child,
you've just discovered this at the end
of your searching for the Nancy Danderhoof article.
And discovered this information as you guys get back
to 9 Shady Street.
This is early in downtime.
We'll resolve everything else.
But earlier on in this segment of downtime,
you guys come back from having secured Patty Babcock
and have this information.
HJ, you're getting some texts, by the way, from Amelia Brown
who is commenting on the document you shared
with her about plans for the bus route.
And you see that she's beginning to respond
and saying, "You know what's really interesting
about this is we don't have to go
to the town for these funds.
There's a number of county funds that actually exist
that have been appropriated
and are sitting in a bank account unspent."
So just basically going through it
and she starts to rattle off a lot of information
about the political-
Is this because her mom was part of that bank?
Yeah.
Potentially so, but she's like,
"This is the other stuff that we have."
And Maya shoots you a text saying,
"HJ, love to know if you ever wanna do a one-on-one
or maybe a one-on-two with me and Amelia to talk.
Really appreciated you big-upping her
and her ambitions for-"
I mean, I think I gotta say yes.
I keep it friendly with her,
but I'm gonna let everybody know
because we know about that now, right?
- We're all aware of her. - Yeah, I've told everyone
You're back at 9 Shady Street,
and you tell people about the Maya stuff?
- Yeah. - Cool, cool.
So I let Amelia know about how
all the permits for the lanes
are just sitting there as well.
Like, everything is green light except there's someone-
These public hearings that keep getting scheduled.
These people are definitely putting a stop
to a lot of things,
but that can be easily changed if we get the right
people in there.
Wink, wink.
Hell, yeah.
Also, you get a message from Amelia
and talks about some property at the edge of town,
not too far from the library and points out
and says, "Zoo?
Please tell Vesper this idea may not be as crazy
as some people might have led her to believe."
I relay.
I run to the plot.
Sprinting to the plot,
you see that there is a large plot at the edge of town,
on the other side of Mine Road basically,
that looks like some farmland that has been left fallow
for a couple years 'cause it's just not
super productive to plant.
And it's there by the cemetery, kind of?
By the cemetery.
Okay, cool.
Fun! That's cool news.
- It's amazing. - This is our girl.
I think she is gonna... She seems aligned.
You also get a note from Helena being like,
"Thank you so much for the help with the finances.
I think I'm gonna be able to afford a car."
Big thumbs-up.
Wow. That's great.
- From Amelia- - We're getting a bus for her.
We got nine Bingo buses.
Bingo bus is buying a car?
Well, give her a bus.
Yeah. Yeah.
I don't know. I heart it.
Tell her not to be public about the car thing,
'cause we need the bus thing for the story.
- Can we- HJ, I know. - We slash the tires.
I know you've been reached out to by Maya.
It does feel like there's a conversation
- that we need to had there. - Definitely does.
I love the zoo.
I've always been pro zoo. It's on the wall.
I think it's gonna be pretty easy
to get along with Amelia.
It does feel like Maya has some headbutting
that she wants with us.
So I'm curious what she thinks
a two-on-one is gonna be like
with me if, like, I am the
pushover or something
- in this room. - What if it's a two-on-one
but then Darkest Man is a pile of trash in the corner?
- Now, you know- - I can actually be
a moving pile of trash now.
I demonstrate. I become trash.
Just like-
I'm just kicking the shit outta you.
It's me.
I don't hate that play.
Yeah, same. I would love that.
If that works for you.
It might be something that you could even
just be super direct,
'cause for all we know this is just everyone's defenses
are up and so there's just a miscommunication.
Yeah. Yeah, that's true.
You never know.
And then if you're direct
and you find out that it wasn't that,
then Darkness Man is a moving pile of trash.
Yeah. So fast.
So fast, so big, so ugly.
Gee, stop.
Sorry.
You make a date to see Maya
and Amelia together with Darkness Man kind of trailing?
I guess I'll try one more time to be like:
One-on-one, two-on-one sounds great.
It would be nice to talk as a whole group.
How does that sound?
You don't get a response to that.
I write: Bitch.
Hey, that's the old-
We're the worst characters.
Send me a text to see if it goes through.
Oh, let me see. Hey.
Ding, worked.
Try me.
I sent you a text. Wait, what's your number?
You don't have my number?
Who have I been texting?
No, I'm kidding, I'm kidding.
Okay, so she didn't respond to that.
Yeah, okay.
So I guess Maya just doesn't,
probably just doesn't trust that we're buying stuff
and is trying to... Just doesn't fully trust us yet.
Best-case scenario, she just thinks we're kind of bad
for buying her girlfriend's mom's house-
- Which makes sense. - ...that was ripped away.
- Yeah, which is fair. - At this point we have the,
we have Elysium, you know?
Is there a show of faith that...
I mean, it's a good chip to have.
I'll say this, I'm a businessman.
Let's make a business deal.
- Okay. - I love that.
LaVonte, you spent so much time
making your perfectly white room so white.
Exactly. That's why, to give it up,
let's make a business deal.
Let's make a business deal.
We've invested some in the property.
Very much so. There's a perfectly white room.
- Windowless, perfectly white. - We've ruined a room.
We tell Amelia 800,000 out the door.
She can have the house back.
Whoa, that's steep. I have to say also, coming clean,
I think I might have turned her childhood bedroom
into an Elvis jungle room.
That's what I did with my room.
And I think it was her childhood bedroom.
I'm sorry, Elvis jungle room.
Elvis jungle room.
Like Graceland?
♪ There's a pretty little thing waiting for the king ♪
down in the jungle room ♪
♪ We're walking in Memphis ♪
He's got the prettiest voice.
That's a gorgeous-
Tones of Darkness Man.
Stop.
We have to do karaoke.
Stop.
That moving pile of trash can sing.
Let's set- You should have this meet.
And one other thing,
did you disclose everything with us about-
Yeah, for sure. Everything. I'm an open book.
Does the Camarilla know that
the one member of the Camarilla straight up has a Metr...
Is she taking a cut on the side? Is this?
That would be incredible if we discovered-
Ask your dude.
Would you call him?
- Blood daddy. - Ask your blood daddy.
Because there might have been a reason
because she didn't mention any of that
in front of all of us.
You're very right.
Yeah, just ask him. Text him, call him, FaceTime him.
I don't want-
Send him a letter.
Everyone's gotta turn away.
- All right. - All right.
Okay.
We'll all leave.
Do your trash thing.
- Do my trash thing? Okay. - Gonna call him.
The phone picks up.
"Ah, Zaeth,
my childe.
How does this evening find you?"
Evening's finding me great.
We're actually making some moves.
That is very good to hear.
I...
Ermine is on her way
to Purpee right now.
On her way right now?
The article that came out, there was a problem with it.
She's handling it.
- Fuck. - Oh, how is she...
I don't care, but... I don't give a shit.
But how is she handling it, if I were curious?
She just mentioned to me that she's going to handle it.
Was there there some sort of Masquerade problem with it?
Did you reveal something in there?
No, no, I'm just- I don't give a shit.
But how did she say-
Like, I don't fucking care at all,
but if I cared...
I don't... What is your question?
I'm saying I don't fucking care,
but if I cared.
Great, that is established.
You don't care.
But if I- Okay, well, speaking of Ermine...
We just kind of realized some just,
I don't even know if it really matters to you,
but it seems like she's taking...
It seems like she's on payroll for Metr.
What?
Yeah, she's like- There was an email
that had her name at Metr.
She sent you email from a Metr email account?
Sorry, one second. Wait, who got the email from-
Just say that you talked to some business person
who said that she works there and that they got an email.
- You there? - Yes, I still here.
Yeah, it doesn't even...
I don't even really fucking remember,
but I talked to some business person from Metr,
and they said they got an email from her
that had her email address, yeah.
We have screenshots.
You have screenshots. Say we have screenshots.
Yeah. I don't fucking give a shit,
but we have screenshots.
We can't Airdrop them. He's in a different town.
Who gives a shit if he sees the emails?
Wait, who are the emails to?
Inter Metr stuff.
I'm getting some chatter in background.
What- Zaeth?
Can I get an Americano?
Yeah, sure.
Do you want-
Why is LaVonte ordering Americano from Darkness Man?
Excuse me, your bathroom is broken, you foul bastard.
My bathroom's not broken.
There's nothing wrong with my bathroom.
My screenplay is perfectly fine without your help.
Listen, Zaeth.
Madelaine should not be writing screenplay.
She should be working on what has been led up.
God, you can hear well.
It's an open FaceTime.
When you cover the phone with your hand,
I'm still seeing your cheek.
Oh, hey.
My first iPhone.
Listen, everyone need to button up, okay?
Okay. But I just wanted to say two things.
She's working for Metr.
That's, like, outside of us being buttoned up, that's just-
Why you so sure of this?
Here, this.
Look.
Hold my phone up to yours.
Do you want to send me this thing
- you have on this other phone? - You want to hold it up.
- You see he- - I saw the iPhone.
He screengrabs on his side. Click, click.
We're looking into the Whittakers and whatnot.
And during our tech...
You can take
- the apron off. - ...investigation.
Sorry.
During the tech investigation,
we hacked into some emails and this is what we saw.
We thought it was suspect.
She's double dipping in the piggy bucket.
Exactly.
In the piggy bucket.
See he looks and says,
"Who is bumpyrogers@sundayscoop.org?"
It's the editor of the Sunday Scoop.
It's a highly coveted position.
I remember when he got the position, everyone was like,
"It should have been Nancy Danderhoof,
but she's really too busy."
We keep tabs on Bumpy
because as keepers of the Masquerade,
we know it's a bad idea
to have journalists know about vampires.
Yeah. Yeah.
This is actually how we're kind of running shit.
Zaeth, I'm gonna need a Manipulation, Subterfuge.
Can I use my Wingman ability in this moment?
Yes, you can.
Please add four dice.
Okay. I'm gonna Blood Surge.
What about, I'm an ingénue so I deflect blame.
Yeah, you can give another die to Zaeth.
Can I use my Melpominee that is Awe through the phone?
- Sure. - Sorry. How many, how many?
One from me.
One from you.
Four from LaVonte.
And then if it's my full Presence, it's three from me.
Okay, you can get three from...
you can get three dice from Siobhan as well.
Okay.
That's my prince.
My prince, my prince.
I'm just gonna Willpower.
Just to see what we do.
That's a crit, baby.
It's a messy crit, right?
One of your crits is on a Hunger die?
Yes.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, so that's 11.
I'm gonna need a Willpower roll
to avoid frenzy, difficulty of two.
And I should use the blood die.
Yeah, you should use the blood die.
Come on, now.
- Got it. - Got it.
Okay. Incredible.
You do not frenzy, but you can feel...
You can feel that Koschei's status over you in this moment
and the fact that he is not immediately
acquiescing is tough.
So, what did you roll for your Persuasion
or for your Manipulation, Subterfuge?
- 11. - 11 successes.
All right, so in this moment you managed
to not frenzy. You get 11 successes.
Guys, get the fuck outta here.
I didn't know what a FaceTime was, okay?
Okay, in this moment,
speaking to Koschei on this high number of successes,
what do you do?
As you can feel the rage kind of building up as he's like,
"What... So, okay, this picture is from a newspaper.
Why you have access-"
Why don't you trust me, man?
Why don't you fuckin' trust me?
I'm coming to you and I'm being,
I'm telling you something about someone you work with.
I'm not making it up.
They work for that company.
What does it hurt to follow up that lead, man?
There is nothing he can say in response to that.
He goes, "I appreciate your loyalty
because you must know it takes great loyalty
to do something this dangerous.
You are snooping around one of your elders in the Camarilla.
If you are right, you have told me something of great value.
Zaeth, whatever punishment Purpee was supposed to be,
you have proven your doubters wrong.
You have stayed hungry, my childe."
He hangs up the phone.
High five.
That's my guy. That's my prince.
That's my prince!
I could really tell you didn't give a shit.
Hey man, if he kills me then I'm dead.
It seemed like for a moment you really might give a shit,
and then you just dug so deep.
- Yeah. - I didn't fuckin' care.
I've never seen anybody care less, and I'm French.
Yeah, it was like both your hands were in the piggy pot
and you wouldn't let go.
- Do you think, Ermine is it? - Yeah.
Is Ermine gonna kill Nancy Danderhoof?
Yeah.
We gotta go, yeah.
A few nights later, you get a follow up from Maya
basically being like, "Hey, looking for that two-on-one.
Amelia would also love if Vesper came along as well."
Can I just call her?
Yeah, give her a call.
She picks up. "Hey, it's Maya."
Hey, Maya.
Can't help but notice,
you don't want to meet with the whole group.
I'm looking forward to chatting
and getting on the same page,
but I feel like there's something unsaid
and I just... I love going into
cahoots with you, and I just want it all
to be out in the open.
There's a long pause.
"HJ, I don't know how safe it is to say this,
but the reality is
you and your Kindred are living here in Purpee
and it's a very small town.
So I need to be worried first and foremost
about the safety of myself and my loved ones.
What I can tell you is you are in a divided house.
Your coterie is not working to all of one purpose.
I can't share with you how I know that,
but I just want you to know
that the idea
that has been floated in our big group discussions
that you guys are a united front
that universally cares for the well-being of Purpee,
that's not true.
I think you do."
Yes.
So Childers can come
- and that's okay? - Yeah.
Could Zaeth come?
I've had a hard time getting a bead on Zaeth,
I'm not gonna lie.
He just kind of doesn't fucking care.
Throwing a dumbbell in the basement just to see how far.
Throwing a dumbbell?
Maya says, "Look, it's possible that you're
deceiving me as well.
And then that's egg on my face.
My instinct tells me
that you're coming from an honest place.
So I'm trying to move from that position.
And the truth is, you guys have successfully
shaken things up in the town so much
that we have opportunities we didn't use to have.
I'd be a fool not to acknowledge that.
But the only thing I can say is if you guys are united,
you are united behind something
that you haven't said to me publicly,
and you are all deceiving me,
or some of your Kindred are not telling you things."
I just... Maya...
I just need more information.
I think that we're all on the same page
and I want us all to meet and get cracking on this campaign.
How about me, LaVonte, Childers, and Zaeth?
You see, she looks at you and-
There's a pause and she says,
"If this is not an active deception on your part right now
and you are being honest in this,
then let me take a risk and speak to you in good faith.
LaVonte is the one you need to worry about.
His future is not in Purpee
or at least not necessarily in Purpee.
And if he hasn't told you that,
then he is, if not lying, obfuscating something from you.
Someone looks me in the eye and tells me they wanna build,
you know, Rome here in Purpee,
and I find out later that that's not true?
It doesn't mean that I'm hurt. I'm not offended.
But it means that it's not all being dealt above board.
There are cards being exchanged under the table,
and I have to take that seriously
because I do love this place and the people in it."
Okay, well, we will meet.
It'll just be me, Darkness Man,
Childers.
Darkness Man wants to come?
Yeah actually. Actually, yeah.
What?
So it'll just be four of us.
We'd love to hang out with you,
and if we're putting our cards on the table,
we heard from Nancy Danderhoof that you
made an 11th hour change to the article.
I didn't make a change.
I made a...
I offered some information
with the understanding that I thought it would be
of interest to Nancy.
I pointed out what I thought the repercussions
of various angles on the paper would be.
There was no compulsion.
I didn't twist her arm or anything.
But the reasons I had for doing that
are what I wanted to talk to you about kind of one-on-one.
But, you know... But it's all,
you know, it's all whatever.
So, it's all fine with me.
Let's set a time.
Yeah.
It'll be us five, you too.
We'll do Vesper and you and Darkness Man.
Zaeth can come if he wants.
Again, Zaeth just hasn't chatted me up too much.
Yeah, totally.
Look, I know that you guys all work together
and it's very probable that
you'll have to mention that they're not invited.
I understand that this is...
If this is already public knowledge amongst your coterie
that I want to speak to some of you and not all of you,
then I imagine it's very hard to navigate,
and it's possible that you are,
if you'll forgive me saying this to someone
that I believe is more than a century old,
maybe there's a bit of naivete here.
Maybe you really have faith or trust in your companions
and you're not dealing under the table.
I just...
In all my years on this Earth,
I do feel like hashing it out in person,
all cards on the table, you usually end up
with a better understanding of each other.
So we'll show up, us, Madelaine,
Zaeth.
- Madelaine wants to come? - Yeah.
Okay.
I'm not interested in that.
Okay.
I'm gonna need to get back to you,
- honestly. - Yeah, I know.
That's all right.
Look, I think you found something here in this place
and the thing you're looking for,
I'm interested in providing,
and there are things that your companions are looking for
that I'm not interested in providing.
But I think there are things...
If you're talking about things
that we've been able to do in this town,
you're talking about LaVonte.
I respect your loyalty, and
you have issues in your house that I've
explicated as much as I care to.
My offer is not to speak to the whole group of you
because I don't feel safe doing so.
So you let me know how you want to speak to me.
But the four sounded fine, before we added Madelaine?
Yeah, I guess if Darkness Man and Zaeth
want to come, they can.
Vesper was really kind to Amelia.
Heard about the zoo, she's amped.
Vesper was very kind to my partner in a way
that I was not able to sense anything underhanded about.
And you, in particular, I saw something
in that food co-op the first time you came in
that led me to believe that you are in a moment of-
Whimsy.
...whimsy.
I did a reading and I found you at a huge crossroads,
and I think some of your companions
are very much not at a crossroads, HJ.
Mm. Okay, well this is interesting.
Thanks for hopping on the phone with me.
I know your generation doesn't really do that.
Actually, I'm kind of more into it.
Oh cool. That's awesome.
Okay.
Be well.
Yeah.
And she, click, hangs up.
Beeline for LaVonte.
Yeah, dude.
Coffin slowly.
Heely down the stairs to LaVonte.
I'm down here.
Did someone fall down the stairs really hard?
- No. - Okay.
I just heard the loudest noise.
I'll say this, Madelaine, earlier that evening,
you get a text from Ermine saying,
"I would like to see you and LaVonte at Bud and Branch-
- Fuck. - Right now."
Now?
Fuck. LaVonte.
Hmm?
Red light mask.
What's going on?
We're fucked.
Oh, oh the nincompoop wants to talk to us now?
You're the nincompoop. She's the bitch.
Whoever is whoever. I mean...
Text back.
Text back we'll be there in 15.
Okay. I text back, "We'll be there in 15,"
and then I take a picture of the Yellow Pages that I found
and went, "Just so you know, I've been working on it."
The 1991 Yellow Pages from
- Purpee, Oregon. - From Purpee, Oregon.
Evidence of my-
Evidence, yes.
She does not respond to that message.
What do you think it is?
I think she's going to kill us.
I think we should run to the hills.
No, no, no.
I think we either hide in the basement
or run to the hills
or maybe tell the werewolf where she is.
No.
Or maybe tell the Bigfoot where she is.
Or maybe tell that big pine guy
with the big dick where she is.
No, she put you under her thumb.
The fact that she's texting you,
the fact that she's not just here.
The fact she wants to see you
and asked you to bring me? I think we got her.
You think we got her?
Oh yeah.
Can we bring Darkness Man?
I mean, if he'll play trash.
Darkness Man, you want to play trash?
Yeah.
You hang out in the white room, you're like-
- A white pile of trash. - A white bag of trash.
White trash.
Recycling.
White trash.
Let's hop on the one Bird scooter we have left.
Okay, good.
Well should we gather everybody up?
- Are we on patrol? - Yeah.
We may or may not be about to die.
- Yes. - No.
With Darkness Man and Bat Child, you're never about to die.
You're about to be saved.
Yeah.
Ermine has reached out
and asked for a two-on-one with us.
Oh.
Maybe we ask Helena to close down Bud and Branch.
That's Helena's place, right?
- Yeah. - Yeah.
And we six-on-one murder her?
What?
No, we cannot murder her
because she's a representative of a very dangerous
- organization. - But we have- We know-
And they know where she is, and if we kill her-
There is nothing worse than a vampire
killing another vampire.
But, but hear me out.
Isn't there a handbook?
Why do these new people not know nothing?
Absolutely didn't read the handbook.
Only false vampire bats eat other bats.
Okay.
Why don't we set the conditions for her to try to kill us,
and then we kill her instead.
Yes, if she tries. If she raises
- a hand to us. - If she tries to kill us,
we can kill her.
But maybe we need to video it as proof
because she's much more powerful than us,
and she's maybe allowed to kill us.
We can tell her that we know what she's doing.
I just don't think she's gonna try to kill us this round.
She's probably gonna scare us.
Well, why don't all of us go there just in case she does,
'cause if only two people go,
she might try to kill you guys.
I think this is not a power play.
I think that she's in... She needs something from us.
I don't know if Zaeth's amazing call the other day
has set off some domino effect,
but I don't hate the idea of everyone being there.
But I think we should start the meeting
like it's all good.
Why don't we wait and you have a distress signal,
and we could come in if something goes
- wrong. - Perfect.
Because I could just activate my mouth to the portal
to the abyss,
and then if it goes bad, you guys could just push her in.
If I order a Chenin Blanc, everyone crashes.
I'm gonna forget that.
I think it needs to be something so loud,
'cause I think we have to be outside,
because we're noticeable.
I'm gonna... I am not... Can't remember.
If I order a Pinot Meunier.
Again...
Airtight, airtight. I'll get it.
I will hang out in the trash outside.
You just wave and I'll signal the other people.
All right, great. If we say "Yoo-hoo."
If you guys order a Yoo-hoo, I know that.
Great.
- Great. - What if you want a Yoo-hoo?
What if you get there
and there's just an ice cold Yoo-hoo within?
Man, I haven't eaten anything in over 40 years.
I have never had a Yoo-hoo.
I do not want to know what it tastes like.
Ah, you're gonna love it.
We head to Bud and Branch.
You guys head to Bud and Branch.
I'd like everybody here to give me Dexterity, Stealth,
except for Madelaine and LaVonte.
I've known her for a long time.
Would I know roughly what her power set is?
You've known her for a long time,
and you know that you've seen her do a lot of crazy shit,
and you've probably got less than half of what she can do.
The Tremere, they are the masters of blood sorcery.
Like, they've got tricks.
It's similar to Bat Child in terms of a broad range
of ceremonies and various stuff.
I relay this to everybody as we're going over there,
just to make sure everybody knows that
she could kill us all.
Like, this is a dangerous woman.
So you see LaVonte gearing up
to head out of the house as you just had that call.
Okay. Put a teabag in my mouth.
I want to sidebar with you later.
Yeah. If we survive, happily.
What was our Stealth, Bat Child?
- Six. - Six.
What was our Stealth here?
- I got an eight. - Eight.
I got a three, but I do have Unseen Passage,
which means I'm-
It's like my Cloak of Shadows
but it's when moving, so if someone's not watching me,
I'm supposed to be able to be, like, gone.
Yeah. So you guys just sort of hang out.
Are you hanging out in an alley behind Bud and Branch?
I think the idea is I am in the trash near a window
so I can see if something goes wrong.
If something goes wrong, I warn these guys
who are down the street a bit,
so it's not just a group of people
hanging out outside the restaurant.
I'd like to be hanging like a bat
from a lamppost near you,
so that I can fall to the ground and drop my jaw.
So we're a little bit split up,
but we can all signal each other.
I got a eight so I want to try to get as close as I can.
I'll be in the Subaru.
Great.
You're parked in the car.
HJ, give me Wits, Awareness.
Gonna Blood Surge.
- Okay! - Okay!
That's four.
HJ, you're parked up the street a little bit.
You see that there is a black-
Driving with Heelys on?
I never took the Heelys off and the wheels are still in.
You just see that there's a black sedan rental car
that's parked on the street
and there are two figures seated
in the front and passenger seat
that are on the opposite side facing the other way.
And you can't see faces,
but you can look through the windshield
and see these two
and see them sort of sitting there,
perhaps looking at you as well.
I think I text the group chat about that,
but in as vague words as possible.
Gotcha.
Madelaine and LaVonte, you walk in.
Helena looks up and says,
"Mr. Worthy, good to see you."
Good to see you as well.
- Welcome. Welcome. - We're meeting a friend.
"Yes, right this way. Please come with me."
And on the stools on a high top,
you see, again, black pencil skirt,
some sort of chopsticks through a bun of hair.
You see, Ermine's rectangular spectacles. Looks over
and says, "Well,
Madelaine, LaVonte, good to see you.
Take a seat."
Good to see you as well.
Give her the three French...
How was your trip up?
Good, took a helicopter. It was very speedy.
- Lovely - Fun.
But they had the rental car.
I had them drive up the rental car before I got here.
Yeah, of course. Just in case.
Just in case.
So,
the article came out.
LaVonte, have you talked
to Madelaine at all about the article?
I think Madelaine mentioned that.
Yes, we tried our very best,
but Danderhoof is the best in the business.
- Little Pac-Man. - The fact that
she hasn't won a Pulitzer is only because
she's not been campaigning for herself.
So you mentioned the favor that I asked for to LaVonte?
Because he's helpful to me.
You think I can do these things on my-
Good, from now on I'll remind you both
that you are both in debt to me, prestation debt.
Oh no.
A boon is owed to me.
- Got it. - And we are trying our best.
- When I ask for something- - Yes.
...based on this obligation you owe to me,
secrecy will be assumed.
Understood?
Yes, absolutely.
Now, the issue I'm having is
I cashed in a boon.
Over the course of centuries,
this is the way that we have found
to structure of vampiric society.
It doesn't work any other way.
Doubloons literally go bad.
Civilizations and empires fall in the amount of time
that we have to do business with each other.
So you can't rely on currency.
You have to rely on something deeper.
And for us, that's favors.
My favor didn't happen,
so I didn't get to cash it in, did I?
Well no, we worked really hard
on making the favor not happen,
but like I said, Nancy Danderhoof
is the best in the business.
She went to Hong Kong and she works
for a local Omaha business paper. She's not-
Where's Nancy Danderhoof right now?
She's constantly moving, I think.
I don't even know.
She's not even staying in one Airbnb.
She move around the city.
Well, here's the issue, Mad.
I can't find her phone number.
Dan Danderhoof is maybe in the tropics, but maybe he's not.
The issue we have right now is this,
that the sale can't go through.
Mm.
It is not possible for Metr right now
to do business, at least here in Purpee with the Whittakers
and at least not with public land,
which is necessary for this deal to go through.
We need to acquire that business park.
And because the Whittakers are now tainted
because you didn't stop the article
from going through like I asked,
what's gonna happen, Mr. Worthy,
is you're going to buy that business park.
Oh.
And you are going to sell it to Metr.
Okay.
All right. Those are instructions.
And you're going to acquire
the Caroline Vine Trailhead along with it.
I will point out, I don't think the Whittakers
are that tainted because we worked really hard
to make it that it was his bank business
that was the problem and not the city council.
And that was us.
That's worse, Madelaine.
- That's worse. - No, it's better.
No, Madelaine, it's not better.
The credit union is where the Whittaker wealth is held,
so the fact that that has been pointed out to us
makes transacting with that financial instrument-
Well, so they will want to sell
even more than they already do.
Metr is a publicly traded company.
The board doesn't want to do business with people
that have just been shamed and embarrassed and disgraced.
You are an unknown entity.
You can buy it and then sell it again.
See, I think this is great because you are asking me
to do things that are very complicated and I'm quite stupid.
And if you ask LaVonte, he maybe can do-
You're not this stupid.
It's insulting for me
for you to hold yourself out like a moron when you're not.
You have been around for two centuries.
You figured something out.
I want results, not babbling.
Can I ask one question?
I'm thrilled to be on board and executing this plan.
Metr. How long have you worked there?
Give me...
Woo.
Give me Charisma and Intimidation.
Can you add one for the Heelys that he's wearing?
Yeah. Can I add one?
No Discipline powers here.
Okay, great.
This is raw Charisma and Intimidation.
I'll Willpower two of them,
for two successes.
Okay, she looks at you and says,
"What makes you think I work at Metr?"
Well, you're talking about the board.
You seem to be
very involved in at least a stake, I'm assuming.
Given your stature, probably significantly.
There are a lot of stakeholders in Metr.
It's a publicly traded company,
unlike Wingstreet and Worthy.
Very exciting.
I heard you just made a recent hire.
We did.
Half a million dollars to a 21-year-old in cargo shorts.
That's pretty impressive. He must be thrilled.
You should see his designs. Rebel-
Rebel Purpee will put this city on the map.
Can I use my Sense the Unseen?
Is there anything happening with her
that I might be able to see sort of psychically?
Do you want to try to use
one of your Discipline abilities here in this moment?
Well, Sense the Unseen is just on.
Yes.
So it's not really me using it so much as I have it.
- You get a premonition here. - Oh.
You see Ermine
staring, naked,
blood streaming from her eyes,
a shattered world behind her
as the sun supernovas and devours the planet.
And you see her screaming in terror
and you see her clutching something like a mother figure.
And you see that this woman
that is surrounding her is composed
of flowing numerals of ones and zeros
and is embracing her as she weeps into its shoulder.
And as it turns,
you see Davis Otherman's face.
"I will never let that happen."
And when you consume the world,
then what will there be to eat for the rest of us?
She turns to look at you and look at you and says,
"I'm calling in a debt.
Am I being told
to my face
that that request is being refused?"
I think that the request is too shortsighted,
and we would request that there is another way to do this
that is more...
let's say holistic.
My heart is beating in my chest.
That maybe we don't destroy the town of Purpee,
which is what this would do,
but instead build it up to feed on it.
Purpee,
the town-
Yes.
...doesn't matter.
The people here don't matter.
Their lives don't matter.
Their dreams don't matter.
And your fondness for them does not matter.
No. Here is where you mistake me.
I do not care about these people.
I do not care about their lives.
I agree they are not important,
but why kill a thing that we are eating?
"I don't have the time to explain
the laws of entropy to you.
I hope that you can get to Australia in time."
And she stands up from the table
and says, "I'm being told
that my debt will not be remunerated to me.
Am I hearing the same from you?"
Can we step outside for a second?
She says, "Anything you can say to me,
you can say in front of Madelaine here."
I think we can do it. I can do it.
I think we should celebrate.
Helena?
Can I get a Yoo-hoo?
Wait, we can't.
We don't wanna attack other people in there, right?
- I guess we just get ready. - I am on a lamppost.
I am gonna Touch of Oblivion my jaw to break it
so that I can get my mouth even bigger,
and then turn my mouth into a portal to the abyss
and I'm ready to just land on her.
Oh, Mousetrap style.
Yeah.
Mousetrap style.
"You are a coward, and you are a boob.
Goodbye.
You have ended your unlife here tonight."
And she proceeds to walk out of the bar.
When she walks out, can I descend?
It's a big steel marble falls.
Yeah. And I'll leap out and I'll try to help.
Unbelievable.
Okay, everybody roll Wits and
- Awareness for me. - Oh my god.
Roll Wits and Awareness.
On the street, outside Bud and Branch, it is 7:30 at night.
Everybody else in Purpee is asleep.
It's 7:30 at night.
I'm literally just gonna land on her
and then you can be like,
"Oh no, this girl fell from a tree."
I'm gonna Blood Surge because I think it's important.
We asked for the restaurant
to be closed down, didn't we?
No.
I thought that was the thought at one point.
- Well, it was pretty quick. - Yeah, we had 15 minutes.
But hey, we waited until she was outside.
- That's great. - Who got a five
or higher on their Wits, Awareness?
Okay, Bat Child you are gonna go first,
followed by Darkness Man.
Okay, I'm just gonna wait until she's underneath me
and then I'm gonna fall.
If there's any way we could-
Like Mousetrap.
If there's any way I could go before her, I could hold,
try to hold her for Bat Child.
Yeah.
So if you want to hold for Darkness Man to go,
you can try to grapple her.
- Right. - So let's do that.
I'm just popping out of the trash.
Launch out of the trash to grab her.
Okay, go ahead and roll Strength plus Brawl.
And I could add Potence to that, right?
You can add Potence to that as well.
Okay, I'm gonna Blood Surge.
She's definitely so strong.
Okay.
I get a Hunger. All right.
So, two for Blood Surge,
three for Potence,
four for Brawl.
I also have a specialty in high ground.
Could I have just been on a higher perch?
Yeah, absolutely.
- I'll add- - On the top of the trash can.
...that.
Guy's on top of the trash can.
Four for Strength. I'm on top of the dumpster.
All right, let's see what I can do here.
Is it contested, or this is just...
That's a beautiful handful of dice there.
Its own thing?
- Come on, Murph. - Come on, Murph.
Don't roll like me.
Ooh, that looks pretty good. Not many crits. Okay.
Seven,
eight, nine,
10.
And then I'll Willpower and add three more,
or re-roll three.
And that's 11.
We're not killing anyone, all right?
To be clear.
Oh, we aren't? The portal can-
We're gonna put her in the portal.
Yeah, exactly.
Yeah. We just don't know what happens in there.
Yeah, exactly.
Well, I mean, she might just kill us even if we...
Okay, so what did you roll to grapple?
- 11. - You rolled 11.
You grapple her effortlessly.
Okay.
You put your arms around her.
As you grapple her,
she only rolls one success to resist.
And you see as you jump and grab her, she goes,
"Oh."
And-
We're so fucked.
She sees you, looks up to see you descending.
And she goes, "This better kill me."
Oh my-
So I'm gonna let you know, she goes next.
Sprinting down the street,
you see coming towards you from far away,
Nancy Danderhoof is running full tilt,
looking up at you doing this.
Bat Child, it is your turn.
- Okay. - Ermine will act next.
Mouth as wide as it possibly can.
Yep.
Plummeting like a stalactite falling.
Tight to the ceiling.
With my mouth open.
The sound of a vortex descending upon her.
Great.
You are going to be rolling Resolve plus Oblivion.
Okay.
How many dice is that?
Seven. And I'm gonna Blood Surge.
Okay.
Sweet. Don't take a Hunger.
Does my 11 grapple apply to her at all as a Help?
Can I give her a couple?
The 11... the 11 is gonna add another two dice to this.
You are rolling 11 dice.
Now, the first thing I'm gonna do
is tell you the difficulty.
Fuck.
You're rolling 11 dice.
The difficulty is seven.
We're gonna roll in the Box of Doom.
LaVonte, staring out the window of Bud and Branch,
watching this happen.
You're the mayor of crit city.
You use this moment to say
that you're still inside.
You need seven successes on 11 dice.
Okay.
- Yeah. - Put 'em on.
- You have to.
- Everyone put 'em on. - Everyone put 'em on.
Everyone put 'em on.
We need seven successes.
And do we get to use Willpower?
You can use Willpower here, that's correct.
Yeah, I will.
But remember, you cannot re-roll Hunger dice.
Yeah, I know.
We have four.
Oh my god.
So all the Willpowers have to hit?
One of them's a crit.
If you get a crit, then we do it.
Oh my-
Four successes on the board. We're re-rolling three dice.
Yeah.
Oh my god.
I didn't get it.
Four successes. We're gonna roll our last two dice.
You need seven.
Nancy Danderhoof, running down the street,
raises a hand as she sees you falling from the lamppost.
And she looks at you and goes, "Little Miss Batman.
Get those cherries."
You may re-roll your Willpower dice in this moment.
Come on.
Yes!
So now it's four, five, six, seven, eight, nine!
Nine successes!
Zealotry to make it a messy critical.
Your mouth gets so enormous.
A big bow.
An enormous bow. As you fall, your mouth-
and it just falls like a fucking traffic cone on-
Your teeth smack into the cement as, fucking,
as Ermine is- Like, you have to
get out the way at the last second,
to let her just-
It's crazy because Bat Child is much smaller than Ermine.
So it's literally a fucking magic trick
of just Ermine is gone,
as Bat Child's face hits the pavement.
After you hit, Ermine is nowhere to be seen.
Did anyone get three successes on initiative,
on Wits and Awareness?
Oh, oh. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I got three.
So that was five. Four was Ermine.
Anyone else get four?
I got one.
You got one? Okay. As they run up, you see
both of the ghouls in the front seat
of the town car kick out from the front seats
and begin to open fire on-
I try to hit them with the car.
Hell yeah.
You hit top gear.
They're gonna fire on Vesper in this moment.
I'm still, like, legs in the air, teeth to the pavement.
Oh god, the teeth to the pavement. Are you all right?
Jesus Christ.
11 damage to Vesper.
Oh my god.
You can roll Dexterity to dodge some of it.
Is it Aggravated or Superficial?
It's Superficial, so it will be halved.
And it's just Dexterity that you roll?
If you have Celerity, you can add it.
But yeah, this is just gonna be Dexterity.
Okay.
- Nothing. - Nothing.
You take 11 points of bullet damage
halved because to you, it's non Aggravated.
So that's five points of damage.
What's your health?
So I was gonna ask, in our downtime,
did we heal that last Aggravated-
You did not heal that last Aggravated.
Okay, so then I'm fully down 'cause I had four health.
You see one of them takes a shot,
blows the back of Vesper's head off. Torpor.
Another one is gonna fire right at you, Darkness Man.
Go ahead and give me either Stamina, Fortitude
or Dex, Celerity.
Just do the Stamina.
- Critical fail. - Critical fail.
- Bestial failure? - Bestial failure.
You fully breach the Masquerade.
You take two points of damage,
halved to one point of damage from the bullet
as it grazes you.
Your mask comes off as they go for a headshot,
and your full mandibles are exposed on the street.
This is a potential breach of the Masquerade right here.
This is happening- There's people 15 feet away
in Bud and Branch who are hearing gunshots
and starting to scream.
As they're firing at you,
leaping in front of you is Nancy Danderhoof,
who takes a pearl-handled revolver out of her purse
and is gonna fire on one of the ghouls.
Danderhoof, you're full of surprises.
She's gonna burn Willpower.
Damn right, she is.
Yeah, she is.
Danderhoof crits.
Danderhoof, straight through the collarbone,
out the back of the neck of one of the ghouls,
hits the ground unconscious.
Did anyone here get two Wits and Awareness successes?
Okay, Madelaine and LaVonte, you are both still indoors
as you're hearing this noise.
I would like to turn
to the people of the restaurant and say:
You see what is happening out here?
This is because of the current city council and mayor.
And luckily we are announcing tonight,
Helena and Bingo the dog are going to be running
for city council and mayor,
and we are going to end the violence in the city of Purpee.
Go ahead and give me Charisma, Persuasion,
and it is gonna be difficulty eight.
I will Wingman you and give you four additional dice.
- Great. - So funny.
The second gunshots happen-
Someone hears-
and you go, "The violence in this city-"
Four of these, and can I use my Awe?
You can use your Awe.
Great.
Okay.
Four, five, six, seven, eight,
nine, 10, 11.
- Oh my god. - Got it.
You see that one of the guys,
as you say that, stands up and says,
"This French lady's right.
We gotta-" Bang, and suddenly
a bullet comes through the window and grazes him
and he goes, "Fuck. The gun violence in this town
is a huge- Fuck! Is a huge problem."
And we are looking for, today, people to sign up to canvas
and to phone bank for Helena and for Bingo the dog.
I think we might be doing Amelia now.
Or maybe Amelia, no.
Helena goes, "What?"
I got 11 successes. Helena, you're running.
You see that someone else stands up and says,
"Let's hash this out.
Are we voting for-
Fuck! Are we voting for Helena or- Fuck! Amelia?"
I say, why not both?
Get the Douglases out.
Get the Whittakers out.
They are the real drain on this city.
Yeah, let's vote for more people than is on the ballot.
Hell yeah.
HJ, that's gonna be you. You're gonna surge forward.
Go ahead and give me Dexterity, Drive.
Okay, great.
What's the difficulty?
- Oh. - Can they add Beauty?
The more successes you get, the more damage you do.
- Can they add Beauty to it? - Can I add Beauty?
How much Drive do you have?
Zero.
How much Dexterity do you have?
- One. - One.
He hasn't been on anything but a Bird scooter.
Roll your Hunger die.
Blood Surge.
Okay, great. Blood Surge.
I get a huge Hunger,
which actually adds a dice,
so it's kind of nice.
- Hell yeah. - Now I'm rolling two dice.
Yeah, great.
I surge forward.
- You get two extras. - Oh!
One you'll be rolling.
Oh, yeah yeah.
And roll another one.
Oh no, you're right.
You're right. Yeah, yeah.
Okay.
- Oh, nice. - That's three.
Three successes. Great.
So, you hit drive. You don't know how to drive.
You've had a chauffeur, so you kind of figure it out.
You're 120 years old.
One of the ghouls has just seen the other one get shot
and killed by Nancy Danderhoof in the middle of the street
and turns around.
The guy who he had spotted and knows is there,
turns the car on, buckles his seatbelt,
turns windshield wipers on, the lights on,
and cruises out at a hot seven miles an hour.
Runs him over for...
Brights on?
Brights on.
He blinds him more than he runs him over.
And you see, you sort of roll over and he goes, "Fuck,"
and rolls up onto the hood and rolls off the side.
- Got him. - Hurt.
Got him.
I keep driving.
HJ, where are you going?
I'm gonna turn around. Everyone meet in the alley.
Put them in the car.
Zaeth, that's you.
I drop down. Ghorse, step on the guy on the ground's head.
I'm just gonna run at the guy
who's still standing and attack them.
Great. Go for it.
So, I'm rolling Dex plus Brawl?
- Yeah. - Does that make sense? Okay.
Ooh. Two successes, two Bestial failures.
He's gonna roll four dice to resist this.
If he's able to resist it, it will be a Bestial failure.
He crits and rolls four successes.
He is so fucking strong.
These are old Camarilla ghouls
of a primogen of their city.
Rolled as bad as I can.
Full Masquerade breach, middle of the town.
People start screaming.
This is going to go to be LaVonte.
I'm sorry, could I have Willpowered?
Oh, you can Willpower through that.
Sorry, I didn't even say that.
Go for it. You just can't do the Hunger dice.
Yes, yes, yes. Okay.
You have three dice you're rolling.
Okay. Yeah.
Okay, so four,
so four successes and two Bestial failures.
Okay, in that case we're gonna say, meets it beats it.
So you do not Bestial fail here.
Just don't do any damage.
Yeah, but you run out and are basically
slugging this guy in the street.
Punching each other's fists.
LaVonte, that is you.
LaVonte is gonna stand up.
The gang violence. It's gone too far.
Everyone out the back.
I'm gonna try and facilitate as many people
exiting the restaurant in this moment as possible.
Give me Charisma, Persuasion.
Charisma, Persuasion. Great.
You can add any of your vampire stuff
- as you're doing it. - Fantastic.
I'm looking through the, I'm looking through the rear.
What he did was right.
Sometimes you have to get rid of the-
Sometimes you just gotta slowly mow into someone.
Beep, beep, beep.
Your hazards fully on.
I actually just get out of the car, don't even reverse.
Just keep driving.
- Let's just go on. - You just step out.
Leave it in neutral, just hop out.
Oh, sorry. Bat Child, you are not in torpor,
you are merely unconscious.
Okay.
What puts you into torpor?
Because if you took that damage all the way up again,
if you took another Superficial damage,
Superficial on Superficial starts to become Aggravated.
- Got it. - Got it.
So, you're out.
But your thing- Torpor is a... It's like
you go to Hunger five and you become-
LaVonte?
Three successes to get as many people out
of the restaurant through the back as possible.
This is an easy pitch for people
to want to flee gun violence,
and they begin to run out the back of the restaurant.
That's gonna be Darkness Man now, yes.
Okay.
Bat Child!
And then I just charge at the dude with the gun.
I'm going to Blood Surge. Pass.
And I'm gonna try to pop his head.
Let's do it.
Pretty bad rolls, but a lot of rolls luckily.
Burn a Willpower.
Seven.
Seven. You take this guy's head off.
Great.
Falls to the ground.
You see Nancy looking around,
holding a gun in her hand, goes, "Smart shooting.
Oh, kiddo."
And you see that she kneels down,
looks down at you, and says, "Ah, poor little kid."
And she puts her wrist in your mouth.
What?
And says, "Go for it, sweet pea."
And I'm going to need you to make a Willpower roll
to resist frenzy in this moment.
I've used three, so I have three left.
Say it's a difficulty of...
What Hunger are you at right now?
- I'm at three. - You're at three?
- Difficulty- - Three Willpower.
You have three Willpower right now?
Yeah.
I'm gonna say the difficulty here is going to be two.
Okay.
I only get one and I can't re-roll them.
You can't re-roll them.
You come to and begin to frenzy.
Bat Child. Bat Child!
You begin to slake your Hunger.
You begin to drink from Nancy Danderhoof's wrist.
I whisper "mommy" while I-
That is going to be HJ,
that's gonna be you. You're in the car.
I weirdly do have a lot in Medicine.
Can I intercede
and try to break the link between Danderhoof-
This is gonna be- It's gonna be Strength plus Brawl
opposed by Bat Child's Strength plus Brawl.
Okay.
You can't use your Medicine?
I can't use the Medicine that I have?
- Medicine? - Yeah,
I have Medicine.
HJ.
He has three points in Medicine.
I have three points in Medicine.
It's injections.
What would Medicine-
How would you use Medicine in this?
Well, she's unconscious and her teeth are shattered,
so I'm gonna try to help her up.
And use, like, a Neosporin.
Right now, the issue is she's up again.
She's just eating Nancy Danderhoof.
Then I put the
- Neosporin on her. - Maybe you could do it
on Nancy.
You may not use Medicine for this roll.
Okay, sounds good.
HJ, Heelys over. Neosporin out.
Got it.
- Strength, yeah. - Okay. We're good.
It's so expired, as all Neosporin is.
Okay, I only got two,
and I don't have to use a Willpower
if I don't want to, right?
You don't have to use a Willpower
if you don't want to.
I only got two.
Just eat Nancy Danderhoof.
She can get a posthumous-
Oh...
Willpower.
I can Willpower.
Oh, thank god.
Two successes.
Two versus two.
I'll say-
I whisper, "Mommy."
You whisper, "Mommy."
I'm gonna say that because it's PC versus PC,
I'm gonna keep it fair and roll in front of the board.
On a success, HJ does it.
On a failure, cannot.
Success!
HJ, you pull Bat Child off Nancy Danderhoof.
However, Bat Child is still frenzying
and so may start to eat HJ.
That's gonna be Zaeth, that's you.
The black car is still there?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I wonder if I can just kind of get everything in there.
I'm gonna throw the bodies in there
and try to get Bat Child and like,
can you eat a ghoul?
Oh... Yeah, you can eat a ghoul as a vampire.
Bat Child.
Oh, yeah. I mean there's fresh blood in these dead ghouls.
So I think that you just hurl Bat Child
into the back of the thing,
and you're just exsanguinating these warm corpses.
I yell: Oh god, she's drunk.
In case anyone's watching.
I keep popping up in the window of the car
just blood
- all over my face. - Thirsty Thursdays!
And we're just-
We load her into the car with all the blood.
I took the bad guy's car and I'm driving.
Cool.
Zaeth grabs both dead bad guys and a frenzying Bat Child
in the back of the vehicle.
Ghorse, clean up this mess, and I just keep going.
You see that there are several onlookers.
Ghorse nods and begins to run down the onlookers.
No, like the blood on the ground.
Oh.
And begins to-
Way worse.
- Darkness Man- - He's drunk, too.
Darkness Man and HJ,
there are a few onlookers on the street
that just observed what was happening here.
Do you have some kind of manipulative thing?
Yeah, we could try this.
- I use my Mesmerize. - Cool.
Where I can give a kind of more complicated...
Yeah.
- ...thing. - Yes.
- Go the gang violence route. - Yeah, yeah.
I say...
This has been brought to you by gang violence.
I say:
What you've seen here today is gang violence.
And there's a horse licking blood off the ground
behind me, comely.
A bunch of humans are just looking at you going,
"Gang violence."
Really scary stuff.
No, they jump people. It's the knockout game.
The knockout game.
The Whittakers started the knockout game.
When the little girl ate that woman
that was the knockout game.
Exactly.
That was the knockout game.
- She was drunk. - She was drunk.
The little girl was drunk.
Bud and Branch is a dangerous bar.
No, actually this was the dispensary.
They were all high on marijuana.
The dispensary that burned down a couple weeks ago.
Yes, they also did that.
The weed is in the air.
I feel like I'm getting less mesmerized.
Was it really?
This is Roofus's Purpee.
And then I make a mental note of all this
to create flyers
or something that we can pass out.
I guess I'll grab Danderhoof
- and let's get in the car. - Is she okay?
And get going to the house.
Someone else can drive.
I'm gonna drive.
I'm gonna drive to Elysium.
Cool.
It seems like a more
inconspicuous place to put the car.
Let's text when we're gonna meet up there.
You guys hook up in Elysium.
There is a very flimsy Band-Aid over the breach
of the Masquerade here.
What HJ was able to pull off with Mesmerize
won't necessarily hold up to repeated questioning
or any possible recording of the event as it transpired.
Is Danderhoof here?
Danderhoof comes to Elysium with you guys.
Is there a way that we could have hit
some security cameras on our way out?
Sure.
I'll say the main one is Bud and Branch,
and you were able to erase that one.
Everything else would've had a weird angle on what happened.
Can we leak to the press
that it's some kind of "Sleep No More" situation?
I feel like we've burned the Banksy angle.
I almost said it was a Banksy
but then I decided gang violence was a lot more buttoned up.
I feel like we just pretend the ghouls
were, like, fighting or something.
I don't know. We can't explain the person being eaten.
That girl Mousetrapped that woman
and that was gang-related.
Let's make sure Bat Child is okay.
Gang-on-gang violence.
I knock on the back door of the-
Bat Child. Bat Child.
- Bat Child. - Bat Child.
Bad Bat Child.
Down, down, down.
No, it's okay. It's okay, it's okay.
- No, Bat Child. - It's okay.
Mommy's here. Mommy's here.
We need to be positive.
We said we were only gonna do treats,
positive reinforcement.
Here, have a blood Churu.
A blood Churu.
Nancy looks over at you, Bat Child.
I'm so sorry.
That's all right, kiddo.
Listen, I'm a little woozy so I'm gonna sit down, okay?
You saved my life.
Aw, kiddo, you don't have to...
That was extraordinarily brave what you did.
And that woman, that was Ermine Damanescu, right?
- Yeah. - She's another vampire.
She was coming to kill you.
You saved my life, kiddo.
Is that why you were near Bud and Branch?
Do you know what that is?
"I was scoping her out.
We don't have a-"
and you see out in the distance, she goes,
"Fuck, there it goes."
And you see, she points out and you see the red light
of a helicopter heading towards San Francisco fading out.
Oh fuck. We're so fucked.
- Who could have done... - Wait, who is that then?
- Who was in- - She was here alone.
Nancy looks in the thing and says,
"Okay, there's the panic button under here for the car.
So I don't think..."
She takes the phones of the ghouls out,
and she takes a little thing that looks like
a little sort of Pokémon Chibi-shaped,
AirPod-looking thing.
Swipes it over the phone.
Hacks it, opens the phone, goes through it, goes,
"Okay.
No. No textual communication from these goons,
but they hit a panic button so the helicopter took off."
Who could have been in there?
It's probably someone from Metr
and not... Unless it's Koschei.
Do we think they hit it
and then hopped out and started shooting?
- Yeah. - That could have been it.
Can you walk me through what this woman's problem was?
I know her as an executive at Metr,
but you all know her for some other reason.
- She's a vampire. - Okay.
They want this plant.
They want something to do with the trailhead.
And the creek.
They need the water from the creek.
For a data center.
Data center?
Do you know the abandoned data center here?
Well, it was supposed to be a computer lab
for Y2K, but that's been-
For Y2K?
Now, that's something I remember.
She nods and says, "So that business park,
the history of that business park in Purpee,
it's flopped a couple different times.
It was early on for Y2K but after that,
it basically didn't pan out.
There wasn't an infrastructure here
for those tech workers at that time.
Metr has been coming after it for a little while,
but backed off when they were- basically,
you know, when I published the piece."
Right. She was working for Metr.
There's a... Please don't- Off the record.
Oh, that's so smart.
So media literate.
That's so smart.
- Off the record- - He's a really good
singer too.
...there's a... Stop.
There's a council of vampires
and she was kind of going rogue
and working for this other company,
and we're also kind of going rogue in our own way
in that we don't want to just completely destroy this town.
We'd like to have a symbiotic relationship, if possible.
But we're also hoping not to anger the council
into coming here and killing us all.
Which I think we might have just done.
But we might be able to leverage the fact
that she was working against the Camarilla as well.
Yeah, we can leverage that.
And then we can also say we didn't kill her,
we sent her to the abyss.
We've only imprisoned her for threatening violence
against Nancy Danderhoof and ourselves.
Can you use a Tech check or something like that
to use one of these now unlocked phones to be like,
"You left me"?
Or can we send some kind of text to see,
was she here with a Metr person,
or who was in the helicopter,
or do we think it was just an empty helicopter
with a pilot leaving the scene?
Nancy opens the phones up and looks through them and says,
"No, there's a communication here for the pilot."
But you see that she looks out and says,
"Looks like pilot and two other security just took off."
She wasn't working alone.
If they took off
because something bad happened to her,
they must be working with some other people.
Right, they wouldn't leave with her-
She's the whole important deal.
Why would they just run?
No, she's not the only important- You're exactly right.
If she was the only important person here,
they would've stayed there the whole night.
She must be here with someone high up.
I can only imagine from Metr.
That parking all throughout the town.
It's a big pain in the tookus.
Yeah, I know that you're nom nom hungry
for another cherry and my wheels have been turning,
thinking that I wanted to come up with something with Metr.
But now it seems that we're being thrust in that direction
so it seems undeniable.
Why would a vampire
risk double-crossing all the other vampires,
if you guys all have to live with each other for eternity?
Unless there isn't an eternity.
Well, there's something rotten in the state of Oregon.
Nancy, what did you do?
What is your magic?
- My magic? - Yeah.
You let me sup from your wrist.
She looks at you and says,
"Kiddo, I just saw that you were scared.
Standing up to the big and powerful?
It takes a lot of guts. I get scared all the time.
You try to go toe to toe with these big old bullies,
but you're never alone when you're standing up.
The people that push us around,
they're pushing everybody around.
And that means that you've got brothers and sisters
and siblings all over the world you never even heard of,
because people like Ermine Damanescu,
they don't just push you into a corner,
they do it to everybody.
And that means they're vulnerable
and they're isolated, 'cause we're together.
So I saw you and I knew
that you needed to believe in yourself,
and that you could eat that little cherry in front of you."
So you're just a mortal
and you offered up your life juice to me?
You see that she opens a little purse
and you see she takes out an obituary
from the Sunday Scoop from many, many years ago
for Vesper Childers.
Did you write my obituary?
How did you even know who I was?
I was just an intern at the Henry Doorly Zoo and Aquarium.
I was just a college student.
Just a young woman
with dreams of sharing her love of animals
with the world is not just anything.
I'm a journalist.
My job is to see what's going on in the world.
And there's so many people
that feel like they can just disappear one day
and then they're gone.
You didn't disappear. No one disappears.
They're somewhere out there.
And I knew that something was going on
with these two superheroes in the town
and that's Bat Child and Darkness Man,
and I started to put two and two together,
and all I'm saying is,
mortal, vampire, whatever.
We all live here together,
and we'd better figure out a way to look after each other
because they're trying to carve it all up for themselves.
So I'm not an immortal and I gave you my blood
because you're a good kid and you got shot in the head.
Yeah, I think the bullets are still in there.
Does anyone wanna take 'em out?
Yeah, I put on some rubber gloves.
And I get out a bunch of dentist tools.
We all know you're really good with medicine.
It's kind of been well-established.
Famously so.
There's a lot to go over here.
But this has been a big night.
Would you like a Propel?
I would, thank you.
You had one Propel?
It's just, like, her exact demo.
We have a way to pass on
powers, kind of.
Yeah.
Do you want pseudo vampire powers
where you can still go out in the day and stuff?
And protect yourself if more people come
for you in a black unmarked car?
We got a guy who can jump, like, 30 feet in the air now.
She looks and says, "I'm quite all right."
You see she pats her purse and says,
"Me and Henry, we'll do fine by each other, okay?
I'm gonna to start sniffing around.
If this Metr has deceased individuals on the payroll,
then that's something worth looking into."
That's a way to spin it.
Maybe the Anarchs are part of Metr or something.
Even just having a deceased person on your payroll
would make your finances kind of funky.
They never announced that their CEO fucking died
in a Banksy.
So Davis Otherman is dead for certain?
Off the record, he died in a Banksy.
His head fell off.
On the record, he died in a Banksy.
But you know, it could be that he's still alive
and his head just fell off.
"Why wouldn't they announce that?"
She looks at something. She says,
"I got forwarded something from a contact of mine.
They sent out a message to all Beholdr employees,
out to all the subsidiaries like Metr and yada yada yada.
Isn't this kind of an interesting way to word this?
'To all employees of Metr Industries,
In an effort to aid the federal investigation
for where Mr. Otherman, our CEO, may have gone missing,
we would love for everyone to upload photographs,
images, and especially videos,
of Mr. Otherman to this shared drive.'"
They're gonna make an AI CEO.
And then that's a whole lot of money that's going nowhere
that they could launder.
I'll tell you what, kiddo. If you're gonna make an AI CEO,
you know what you'd need a lot of?
- Water. - "Data centers."
She closes her phone and says, "I'll tell you what,
you guys are like sharks,
'cause you can smell that blood in the water, no problem.
We got work to do, kiddos. All right?"
You see she-
Says, "Best of luck. Stay in touch, yeah?"
Nancy, where are you staying?
"Nice try."
And she-
I love her.
God, I love her.
I just had sort of a horrible money idea.
My favorite kind.
I don't know if we can do this where we can pull this off,
'cause I don't know.
I don't know much about the actual stock market,
but if we were to somehow tell the world that Davis Otherman
was dead right after we, what is it called? Not long.
Put a short in.
Shorted the-
Long the stock?
My god, Zaeth.
Long short.
You prince among princes.
And that doesn't really solve any of our problems.
- It could just be cool. - It could solve
a lot of our problems.
It's just something to think about.
Just something to think about.
We did give half a million dollars to Patty,
so it'd be nice to make some of that back.
Over 12 months, we'll be great.
You're right, you're right.
I am worried that if the Camarilla comes,
or Metr comes,
we're going to need allies.
Yes.
You were talking about finding Bigfoot.
Yeah, we need Bigfoot.
Yeah.
I think we might need those big feet.
Yeah.
We still have so many downtime successes to pay off.
And as we move from here,
an enormous problem has been created but also solved.
Rather, an enormous Sword of Damocles hangs in the air.
Somewhere in oblivion,
Ermine Damanescu is completely unharmed,
past the portal at the back of Bat Child's mouth.
If they ever gut me like a python,
all our enemies and a huge torpedo are coming back.
Is that how- I was thinking about that,
of like, could she swim out or?
To be honest, I have no idea.
If you sleep with your mouth open, could she crawl out?
We're gonna get you some mouth tape.
It doesn't correlate
with anything in the bat species.
And also now I'm a vampire and not a bat.
So I don't even know how to begin.
Just think that we can use the Sword of Damocles
to cut the Gordian knot and turn all of these people
and unpuzzle our puzzle with...
I actually am not quite smart enough to land this plane.
But doesn't it sound good?
I mean I was all in from top to bottom.
Great.
I don't know what a couple of those things are.
- What sword? - And I don't know the knot.
The knot.
- The Gordian knot. - And now there's a plane?
The Sword of Damocles.
Damocles is a king.
His advisor says, "It's so easy to be a king."
He says, "Okay, you sit in the king chair,
I hang a sword over you.
And that is what it feels like to be the king.
You have a sword hanging over your head all the time."
The Gordian knot is a knot that is un-untieable until
Alexander the Great, he take his sword,
he cut the knot in half. Knot untied.
It was sort of like creative problem solving.
Creative problem solving.
Everyone was trying to untie it, and then-
We just have to make sure we are cutting
the Gordian knot and not the baby of Solomon.
And that's all we gotta do.
I actually don't know the baby of Solomon.
Are you done, your tippy typing?
I'm done with my tippy typing.
Moving forward from this night...
He was typing, "Fly in nude candy bars right now."
More nude candy bars.
As this intense night
that leaves a lot of danger up in the air,
but also the immediate danger of Ermine resolved.
And moreover, based on Koschei's response
and Darkness Man said going rogue,
there's a weird imbalance.
Massive powerful enemies move against you in the darkness.
And yet, Ermine was not being above board either.
So what was she hiding?
And I think moving forward from this place,
is there anything else that gets resolved that night
before we move forward?
I think one more thing as far as Ermine,
let's not tell the Camarilla until they come to us,
because someone who was working with other people
has a lot of other enemies that aren't necessarily us.
So no reason-
We should research who is an enemy of Ermine
and blame it on them.
I would be surprised if Koschei was part of this.
But it might be kind of a good way to gauge the situation
by how long it takes for him to get back to us.
- Yeah. - Smart.
Or whatever.
HJ, you have this intensely momentous night
where you guys have attacked the Tremere
primogen of San Francisco unfolds.
The night also ends with you looking across at LaVonte
whom you still have not spoken to.
What's up?
Bird with me.
Always.
You guys Bird scooter away from here.
- You driving? - No, we're both hanging off
and facing each other on the handlebars.
Beautiful, circus style.
You going somewhere?
I was thinking about it.
All right. What was it?
Austin.
What's the offer?
Seneschal.
Couple of favors worked out, fell the right way,
and they made the offer.
- That's pretty good. - It's not bad, slide in.
That's pretty good.
Leave all this behind.
Let's smoke to it.
Pick a number between one and 500.
439.
439 years from this exact moment,
what do you want your life look like?
This is gonna sound so stupid.
I hear you but you gotta say it.
If we end up doing the night zoo,
I kind of want to be the person
who runs the night petting zoo for really young kids.
So attainable, so fast.
You're telling me after 439 years-
I'm not done.
Okay.
There's a beautiful shack, all wood.
Really orange lighting throughout.
There's a pottery wheel in there.
I'm just making sick pottery.
The kind where you throw it in a fire
and you throw sticks at it during the-
It's called raku.
- It's called what? - Raku.
I want to be making raku pottery.
It's one of the most expensive kind.
Exactly.
And then when the kids come in, I kind of teach them about,
you know, taking a turn and we all feed the night animals
and then I,
and then I just go home
and I just, I feel good.
I just want to be able to kind of,
when I'm feeling stressed,
I put my bare feet in running water.
I'm not,
I'm not trying to get places
after being shot by the police on the bottom of a riverbed.
I just want it to be a little bit easier.
439 years, where do you see yourself?
I'm in a spaceship.
439 fucking years.
I didn't say where the petting zoo was.
Maybe it's on fucking Mars.
We both fucking know it's not.
Four hundred and thirty fucking nine years.
You wanna be in a goddamn petting zoo.
I think it sounds quaint.
I think I'm done getting shot up,
and I think I'm done with blood raves where we kill someone.
I just want to just deeply unplug, to be honest with you.
I want to be wearing just a really big
comfortable sweatshirt at night.
You fucking surprised I wanted to go to Austin?
You think I want to go to Austin?
No, I don't want to fucking go to Austin.
I want to build something here with you.
But I swear to fucking god,
if you don't wanna build anything,
if you just wanna put your fucking feet
in a goddamn fucking river, I'll go to fucking Austin.
I gotta be honest. That's what I want.
I gotta be honest. It's been hundreds of years.
I didn't know this shit even existed.
I tried it. I feel wonderful.
I feel like the chip on my shoulder that made me need
to have a bunch of status has dropped off,
like a scale of one of the lizards at the petting zoo.
What if I still want status?
- I think that's awesome. - What if I still
want to be somebody?
Why do we have to be the same person?
- We don't. - Thank you.
I just thought-
We could compliment each other.
I sell you my raku.
What, I flip your raku?
Yes.
Sell it as local pottery.
- Outsider artist. - From rural Oregon?
I mean, yeah.
Make a killing.
It's 400 years from now. You're on a spaceship.
I don't think they have a lot of pottery on it.
You land, you load up on my raku, and you go back to orbit.
What's the matter with you?
I don't know, man.
Austin sucks.
- It does. - The queso is white.
It's disgusting, man.
It's a bad environment.
But I just don't...
I don't fuckin' buy Bingo buses for my health.
Yeah, they didn't really work out. I'm sorry about that.
I want to be somebody. I want to build something,
and sometimes I feel like what you want to build is small.
What I want to build is big.
Yeah.
And I don't want to be stopped
from building something big.
I can't imagine what you're talking about,
'cause I've never tried to stop you.
Don't fuckin', don't fuckin',
don't fuckin' look at me like that.
I'm in your corner. I'm just also in my own corner.
The most beautiful orange lighting
hitting natural wood panels.
I don't need to be exactly where you're at
to be supporting you.
Yeah.
Okay, that one Maya girl really doesn't like you,
and she wants me to go to dinner without you.
And I just need to let you know that.
That's fine.
If you take Austin, obviously I'll miss you, so
that would suck,
but it's really up to you.
I don't want to go to Austin.
I think we can do what we want to do here, I really do.
- Do you really think so? - I really do.
The whole city's gotta be different
if I'm gonna be living in a shack at the petting zoo.
I did just kill one of the council
of the primogen from San Francisco,
so that's probably a bad look anyway.
Yeah, it seems like maybe you won't get
the mega transfer that you want, but.
Yeah, you know she just...
You know, it's that way they talk, those fuckin'-
Yeah.
...pure bloods, man.
Totally.
They think they're better than you.
They really do.
The system says they are.
They really do.
What'd she call you, boob?
She called me a boob.
I've never been more mad in my life.
Let's go to the shooting range.
- You want to? - Yeah.
We tandem Bird to the shooting range.
Such a long way to Bird.
We got a juiced Bird.
You guys head to the shooting range.
Both of you give me either Composure, Insight
or Resolve, Insight,
and you can choose the higher
or the lower dice pool. It's all how you feel.
What's the other one?
Resolve, Insight or Composure, Insight.
Six out of seven.
Insane.
- Four. - Four.
Firing at the shooting range.
HJ, on six successes...
Making raku in a shed...
I think that you are thinking about
what LaVonte said about building something here,
about wanting to build something.
And you've been a financier your entire life and unlife,
ever since you were bit by a bat
in a dark tunnel and turned into a vampire.
While I was-
Claim jumping.
It's a big part of the-
Is that true?
- Yeah. - Do you think
HJ was really bit by a bat while he was claim jumping?
Yes.
And you think back at all this that's happened to you
and realize your vast unlife is such a gift
because you were able to be completely
unpresent for a century and get another chance.
And if you'd been mortal, you'd be out of time,
and then some.
And I think you realize of all the things
that you've attempted to build here,
you've been cutting checks since you got here.
Patty Babcock's getting $600,000.
We spent quite a lot, yeah. Fleet of buses.
You made the Rockefeller tree, the fleet of buses.
Rockefeller tree.
The Rockefeller tree, the fleet of buses.
You bought Mike's Bar.
I think you do the math in your head.
I mean, you guys are fabulously wealthy.
But I'll tell you what you haven't been doing
is focusing on your vast holding empire.
I don't know if you know how you're doing finances-wise,
and you've been hemorrhaging money here.
What did it get you? What have you gotten?
You've gotten a lot done,
but what did the money get you?
What did the food trucks get you?
You got Patty Babcock locked down,
but you haven't started that campaign yet.
And I think there's just a question of,
what do you mean build? What are we building?
And on four successes, LaVonte,
HJ's never gotten in your way,
and none of your dreams hinge on him.
Why does this feel so bad?
I think on four successes
you're just left with that question.
You are rich by yourself.
Nothing is stopping you.
There's nothing in your way.
Opportunity is right in front of you
at the end of a short and broad and well-lit road.
And that's not making this moment feel any better.
Zaeth, we cut back to you.
Do you do anything later that evening?
Use some logging equipment to chop a car into pieces.
Hell yeah.
As you're disposing the bodies, your phone begins to ring.
Oh shit.
Fuck.
- Zaeth. - You got Zaeth. Sorry.
Kind of a service thing. So, what's up?
Zaeth, we have received a
distress call from the Tremere here in San Francisco.
Ermine has gone missing,
somewhere in airspace.
Have you seen anything in Purpee?
Framing out the chopped up car.
Sorry. What?
- We don't have- - Ermine missing?
We don't have a bead on Ermine Damanescu,
and Tremere have reached out to us,
asking if we know anything.
Tremere's reaching out.
Wow. It's crazy.
I'll keep an ear out, I guess.
What have you heard?
I have heard nothing. We are looking for Ermine.
Who is she, like, working with, by the way?
I'm gonna need Manipulation, Subterfuge from you.
I'm gonna Blood-
Okay.
That's one, two, three. Three?
He looks at you.
"Zaeth?"
Yeah?
Did Ermine make it to Purpee?
Yeah.
Thank you for telling me the truth.
What happened when she got there?
She fuckin' bit off more than she could chew.
She rolled up to Purpee.
Rebel Purpee.
Motherfucker.
Look, Koschei.
This is Purpee.
Fuck me.
Welcome to the OC, bitch.
She's not in San Francisco anymore, Koschei.
When you step in shit in Purpee,
you're gonna track that all the way to your goddamn grave.
You...
you.
I'm the motherfuckin' prince of Purpee, Koschei.
What do you want from me?
Look at that. That's her car.
Those are her little ghouls.
That's what's left of them.
I wasn't lying when we last talked.
She was messing around with some stupid bullshit,
with some idiots that I don't even know.
You told me to step into my own,
and here I am in the full light of my Elysium.
My council of primogens are hanging out.
They're not here right now, but they're a part of this team.
You are prince?
You were chosen
by your coterie as prince?
They unanimously, all in a blind vote,
selected me out of the hat, and I'm not lying.
You see, you see he-
Unanimously out of a hat.
Go ahead and give me Charisma, Persuasion,
and you may add any Influence you have here
or Mentor that you have here.
Mentor?
Whatever the background that gives you Koschei.
- It gives like a Notable Sire. - I don't think I...
- Just add two dice. - Okay.
I think you add three more for Purpee style?
Step in shit in Purpee.
Can you add two for being a prince?
Yeah, plus seven for prince.
- Absolutely no successes. - No! No!
I'm gonna use a Willpower?
Okay. You got it.
I've never seen that.
I've never seen such a thing.
- Oh, a crit. - A crit!
Four successes.
- Jesus. - Christmas.
All right, maybe it wasn't blind,
but they chose me after I nominated myself.
You nominated yourself.
I stepped into the power, not in shit like her.
He looks at you and says,
"Zaeth, you have destroyed
the Tremere primogen
of San Francisco,
and as prince of Purpee,
that is your right.
You have my and Clan Brujah's
full support.
If Ermine Damanescu
crossed you...
Did she bring violence to your city?"
Absolutely.
Her ghouls just were like-
- on the street. - Know this,
Ermine had many friends.
They will look to harm you.
Every step you make will be scrutinized.
They will move against you, but you are my childe.
And if they cross you, they will cross all of us.
And our response will be to meet them, Purpee style.
Purpee style.
Clan Brujah.
May they bring little booties
for all the shit on all the ground
they're gonna track everywhere.
Purpee's covered in shit.
Okay.
And they're gonna need new goddamn shoes.
Bring a fuckin' cobbler, idiots.
Tell 'em I said that.
They will make moves against you.
But know, I will be at your side.
Wow.
I did not know
my sire.
I became a vampire
drowning in blood at the bottom of a bunker
in the Battle of Stalingrad.
Whoa.
The horrors I have seen have left me cold.
But there is hope, yes.
Love you, blood dad.
I love you, my little boychik.
Okay.
- I gotta go. - I gotta go.
Wow.
And it's the right of a prince to call the blood hunt.
And because you had selected Zaeth as prince.
Rebel Purpee.
- Rebel Purpee. - Rebel Purpee.
What is it?
It's this, and then that, and then this.
This, this, dude.
Locked, you lock, you load.
You fire.
Yeah.
You fire up?
Lock, load, fire.
Fuck yeah, dude.
This ain't San Francisco.
This is fuckin' Purpee.
- Madelaine. - So fucking funny.
Yeah.
Madelaine, leaving the horror of that night,
you arrive back at the home
and there's a message on your phone
offering to connect you right before sunrise
with a friend of the Marquis.
You know,
actually I think
that I'm living in motherfucking Rome.
And I don't need to go to fucking Melbourne
with its little cute little trams
and no fucking opera house, 'cause we are going to build
an opera house slash zoo right here in Purpee.
The Marquis de Lafayette forwards a voice note saying,
"Hi, this is Chip Linby, the prince of Melbourne,
wondering if you'd like to do some
vampire things down here."
I throw up from disgust.
We've got a whole sort of secret government,
a cabal of vampires,
and we do nefarious ends.
You know? So let me know. Get in touch.
We'd love to speak about you
being a harpy here at our Elysium.
We have it near the beach, so that's nice.
Also a romance language.
You must love it, being French.
Do you respond to the Marquis?
Here is what I'll say.
I'll say: I want to come back to Paris.
And then I send this voice note to my friends in the coterie
so that we can make fun of it.
Incredible.
You guys all have Chip Linby, the prince of Melbourne's-
I immediately send back my impression of it,
- word for word. - I am Chip Limmy-
Not too far after that,
Bat Child, you had a near-death experience.
Yeah, what does that mean?
You're still badly injured.
- Okay. - But because you didn't get
all the way to torpor,
you can heal naturally
over the course of the next few nights.
Okay.
And I think there's a night, traveling up, you guys
get some more blood and are able to heal
another point of Aggravated damage from Cody.
Walking up with all of those successes
that you rolled in the preceding episode,
high on the ridge,
you guys pass through the Caroline Vine Trailhead,
beautiful vines up on these heather-covered ridges,
pine trees swaying.
You see these two massive
lichen-covered stones,
and you see that, all of them,
they're tall stones that have fallen over
and almost look, you realize, like
reposed lupine figures.
They're not carved at all,
but they just have that look to them,
in that way when dogs have their front legs
tucked under them
and their back legs tucked under them.
And that's the trailhead?
You pass both these stones on the trailhead
and as you walk up under the light,
you see Cody is here with a couple of other teenagers
who clearly are full runaway mode,
like hoodies up, backpacks, on a night hike,
heading up, and in the whisper of the trees,
you hear-
Cody turns around.
"Jay Slice?"
Emerging from the trees, looking down at you, Vesper,
is Bigfoot.
Yes.
Mr. Bigfoot.
My pupil.
I have been training so hard in your image.
You create such a profound example,
and I only want to be worthy of it.
I practice all the time in an empty library.
As you should.
We actually have deep need of your assistance.
Were you here when
a name I can't say,
but a very powerful fertility deity came here?
Do you know who I'm referring to?
I do.
I mouth it.
Jack of the W.
- Wait. - Different.
Jack of the P.
Jack of the what?
- Of the P. - J of the P.
J and the P.
- Of the pine. - Yeah.
- Dude. - Jack of the P.
Come on, man.
Jack and the B?
I said W.
What? What's up?
I'm off.
Lock in, brother.
I'm starstruck.
Me too, me too.
He looks and says, "The spirit that has haunted Purpee
for many decades was unknown to me.
It is not until quite recently
that I've been able to return,
but it was before that time that the spirit had come.
I was almost killed in my first combat
with the one you refer to as Jack."
Well, I'm sure you learned a lot.
And this time you can have some powerful backup.
Darkness Man, turn into trash.
He goes-
Fast-moving trash.
"A pile of trash deep in the forest."
He turns and says,
"Troubling indeed.
I must speak with my order.
There is one of our number
that may know from whence this spirit comes
or the secret places to which he can be returned,
for indeed, he is powerful and cannot be destroyed."
Who else is in your order?
Are there other Bigfeet?
No. Well, kind of.
There's one other that's sort of like a Bigfoot.
Little foot?
No.
Medium-sized foot.
Our order spans across the world.
I here in North America.
A yeti?
My cousin in Asia in the Himalayas.
Oh yes.
There's a member of my order deep in a lake
in the Highlands of Scotland,
who I believe may know the secrets
from where this Jack first came.
Nessie.
You have met my colleague.
No, but, like, everybody knows.
Everybody knows her.
Heard of Nessie, yeah.
So famous.
It's so cool that you know her.
You guys group up and let us know
what sort of support we can give you,
because we're all in on banishing...
If you need a Tommy gun, we can get you that.
I do need a Tommy gun, but not for that reason.
If you need a cannon
that you can use like a gun.
I got a cannon guy.
You need a cannon, we'll get you a cannon.
But here's our bazooka.
He takes it, straps it to his back.
"Long will be the walk ahead of me to confer with Nessie,
but this bazooka will aid me on my journey."
Wait, can I have it back?
No.
- You're going to- - How long are you gone?
It's Bigfoot's bazooka now.
It's Bigfoot's bazooka.
The sun is ascendant, those of the canine folk.
Didn't mean to give it to him.
While the sun is ascendant,
there will be no opposing the Douglases.
Not until the solstice will you be able to defeat them.
Oh, that's the summer.
Wait, that's right around-
Wait, that's around the monster...
Is that around?
The horror fest.
- You know Estelle Laurent? - Yes.
She is a member of my order.
- Really? - Really?
Does she practice kumite?
No. I keep trying to get her to start.
Did you have sex with her?
- With Estelle Laurent? - Yeah.
She's not into guys, so that's tough.
Okay. Damn.
No, it's not tough,
but you know.
No. Yeah.
I knew her. I knew, yeah.
It was a...
What a woman. Importantly-
Wow.
I will walk across North America
and the bottom of the Atlantic Ocean to arrive in Scotland
where I will confer with Nessie.
How long is that gonna take?
A few days.
Oh.
And you're gonna take the bazooka?
- It's the gait. - It's the gait.
And he's wearing trainers.
Are there any deities at the bottom of the ocean
that we don't know about?
Also is Atlantis real?
Oh, a Kraken?
Oh, I gotta know about Atlantis.
Atlantis?
The only reason I stop in Atlantis these days
is to continue my search for lost Lemuria and ancient Mu,
deep beneath the waves.
Atlantis is sort of a starter sunken city.
The ancient city of Lyonesse?
Oh yes.
Okay. Okay.
Is Mothman real?
Mothman has not been in our order for some time.
So he's real, but he's rogue?
- He has betrayed. - Oh.
Oh, the drama.
It's even better. It's even better.
Never would've thought.
Has any rock star ever gotten two of their ribs removed
so they can suck their own dick?
Looks at you and says, "Keith Richards-
No fucking way.
...got both of Marilyn Manson's ribs removed."
He did it to him.
Keith...
Keith Richards is the greatest
kumite master on the planet.
He ran up and grabbed Marilyn Manson's ribs
through his stomach and ripped them out.
Keith Richards is a supporter of women, ultimately.
Ultimately, not in a way that I've ever seen involve
not ripping Marilyn Manson's ribs out of his body
at the middle of a concert.
But yes.
Did you write that down?
Yeah, beat- I mean, best Keith Richards.
Easy, pupil.
Keith Richards is not easily bested.
Yeah, but we only grow if we dream big.
He looks and smiles and says,
"I will search for the hidden knowledge of this Jack,
but I will tell you this now, here in this time,
the deity you seek to oppose
is a malevolent and angry spirit with a large family
of dedicated cultists that support and feed the god.
While the sun is ascendant,
there will be no opposing this green spirit.
But perhaps after the solstice, there will be some chance.
What I tell you now is quite simple.
You must learn as much as you can of the spirit
and those that support it
in this time approaching the solstice.
You must act in this manner.
This spirit almost destroyed me.
It commands the flow
of those vital living things,
the sap of spring, the salt-rich blood of the body.
With a but a single touch,
it can both start and stop a heart
and almost destroyed mine.
But not for my unfortunate alliance with the demon Kupuru
who was able to at least keep
this Jack at bay for some time."
Is Kupuru opposed to...
Kupuru is a malevolent trickster demon, opposed
in some ways to the plans of all beings.
As Jack wished for domination and control
to sink his roots deep into the heart of Purpee
and stop it here,
Kupuru thought it funny and malevolent to oppose that,
but Kupuru would also not wish for any peace in this place.
So, but I'm saying in a moment of dire need,
we could seek out the lust for chaos of Kupuru.
- Yes. - Okay.
But I've only seen one pure enough of heart
to actually compel Kupuru
to freeze around his demonic gemstone.
Nancy Danderhoof.
Do you know Nancy Danderhoof? Where is she?
Nobody knows. She won't tell us?
God, she's good.
She's really good.
I can't let her find me.
- I've gotta go. - Staying at the hotel.
I gotta fucking go right now.
Shit, I gotta fucking go right now.
I'm taking the bazooka.
Thank you. Goodbye.
I was gonna ask-
Who was the one that could oppose Kupuru?
"When he was young and had the strength,
there was one here in town named Herbert Melvin."
You see that he runs off into the woods.
That gait.
So fast.
Cody goes, "That was crazy."
Yeah, that was wild.
Okay, wait, but if...
Jerk off the Penis commands the sap of the spring
and he can stop a heart,
that's not a problem for us, right?
Jerk off the Penis?
I just wrote J of the-
- Like a code name. - Nicknames.
Jerking off.
Jack of the P.
Okay. Jack of the P.
J off the P.
- Let's just call him Jack. - Jack off.
I wonder if Herbert Melvin compelled Kupuru
and forgot about it if it was a deed so encompassing
that he forgot about it.
Or he had a really good poker face
when he watched you take that.
With that meeting with Bigfoot,
you guys look at the months unrolling ahead of you
as being very straightforward.
The Douglases are ascendant in power
until the summer solstice, which is June 21st,
the same weekend as the Laurent Horror Festival.
You guys have Patty Babcock locked up,
and a race for city council and months of work ahead of you.
If Bingo the dog is gonna run,
that means you're gonna be running two campaigns
at the same time.
Three, if it's also Helen.
Three of it's also Helena. Yeah, that's correct.
We might not run our own competition against ourselves.
Let's open up another seat.
The seats surely are all up for election.
The seats are all up for election.
So we can run one of them against the Douglas seat.
Yeah.
A lot of work unveils itself to you
with the knowledge also that somewhere
Ermine Damanescu's friends are hard at work.
The chips are down,
and the fate of Purpee hangs in the balance.
That's all for this episode of
"Dimension 20: City Council of Darkness."
We'll see you next week
for the penultimate episode of this season.
See you there.
"I'm gonna finish up this lap dance
and then let's talk more outside."
Okay, great.
God, I'm so nervous about the big speech I have to give.
- As prince? - As prince.
- "I owe you an apology." - You do.
Roofus is not running for mayor.
I'm a vampire.
"What?"
Hello, bots.
Oh my god. We're fucked.
Spirits.
You've been drowned by the Whittakers.
The business is worth over 771 million dollars
Our business is quite rich.
Why are we living in the suburbs?
"Oh my god. It's like that movie."
Yes, exactly. You got it.
"What do you guys have behind you?"
Money.
Enthusiasm.
Baby, baby, no. Baby, no.
Baby, no.
LaVonte is so sprung.
I'm gonna tell you in a second.
Why can't you tell me yet?
Because I need to roll dice, Zaeth.