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(dramatic music)

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(upbeat music)

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- [Angie] The winters in Iowa are hard,

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but still quite beautiful.

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I guess the cold is a cover charge

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for living in an area
that has four seasons.

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The falls are wonderful.

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Summers are great,

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and the springtime is the
absolute best time in Iowa.

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I love Iowa in the springtime.

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♪ This town ♪

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♪ Walk back down and I'm
coming around again ♪

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♪ If I could talk, I'd tell you ♪

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♪ If I could smile, I'd let you know ♪

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- [Clint] I am a 23-year-old
college graduate.

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I work in an office.

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I like it enough, I guess.

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I hope they keep me here,
then I can work my way up.

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I wanna be a successful
businessman one day.

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Like a family.

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Like, uh, in the old sitcoms.

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I have trouble closing a sale, though.

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I am trying, and it'll get better.

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(upbeat music)

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I grew up here in Cedar Falls, Iowa.

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I was raised mostly by this woman.

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She went to the same church as my parents.

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I was also watched out for by my uncle.

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People call him The Boss.

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My parents were tragically killed,

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but arrangements were
made for the saintly woman

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to take care of me in the
event that anything happened.

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And it did.

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I was too young to remember,
but from what I have heard,

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they were the best.

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My uncle tells me all the time

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how great my mother and father were

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and how much everyone misses them.

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They thought my uncle
wouldn't have been the best

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influence on me growing up.

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He owns an adult book store
and strip club in town.

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Not the best environment
to be brought up in.

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He helps watch over me

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and make sure that the
sweet old church lady

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has everything needed to raise
a good Christian gentleman,

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as he puts it.

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(upbeat music)

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- [Angie] I am 23 years old.

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I never knew my parents,

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I was in foster care most of my life,

51
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until I ended up here in Waterloo, Iowa,

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living with a distant cousin that I found

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searching through Ancestry.com.

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I know very little about my family.

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This is it.

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A cousin.

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She is very Christian, and
goes to church twice a week,

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and Bible study every Friday morning.

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She took me in and is a wonderful woman,

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a selfless woman, who is
always thinking of others.

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I graduated college, but I work here.

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(upbeat music)

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This is my boss.

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His name is Jorge.
- Ah, Dude, what the fuck?

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- [Angie] People call him Jorge,
the Pissed Off Pizza Cook.

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(bell dings)
- You know what?

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I noticed you don't have
any White Zin on the menu.

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Come on, honey.

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Let's get with the program.

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- We don't have any fucking White Zin.

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Why are you asking?

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You sideways wannabe fuck.

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And chewing gum while asking about the pH.

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pH my sorted nuts, puto.

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Stupid fuck.

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- [Angie] But deep down,
he is a big teddy bear.

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Just very passionate about
the art of Neapolitan pizza.

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- Hey, Angie, what can
I get for you, sweetie?

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- [Angie] My passion is music.

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I have written a few songs,

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but still haven't been
able to perform one yet.

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I have stage fright.

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Maybe someday I'll be able to do it.

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(upbeat music)

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I love this bridge.

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I always come here when I'm a little down,

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and it always makes me feel better.

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I flip pennies off of it
into the Cedar River below,

89
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make little prayers and wishes.

90
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I told someone once that I did this,

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and they said it was stupid.

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No wish has ever come true

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on the Fourth Street Bridge in Waterloo.

94
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Well, that just means it's due for some.

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♪ The most imaginary friend ♪

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- [Clint] I come to this bridge sometimes.

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I, I don't know why.

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It makes me happy.

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Every time I come here, I
feel better about things.

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I know no one should ever go to a bridge

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when they're depressed,

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but I like this place for some reason.

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♪ Imaginary friend ♪

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- [Angie] I've been dating,

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but it's hard.

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Still a virgin.

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I wanna fall in love before I
would ever decide to do that.

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(mellow music)

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- [Clint] I'm still a virgin,

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and it sucks.

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I would like to fall in love
before I lose it, you know,

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like the way it really should be.

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But a 23 year old male
virgin while my uncle

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owns a strip club?

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That's just pathetic.

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- [Angie] I get plenty of
advice from church people.

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- I just been through my second
round of conversion therapy.

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I knew it work this time.

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I didn't even come close to a
truck stop bathroom in months.

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- I had just been through
my third stint of rehab,

121
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and I never wanted a
drop of bourbon again.

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I was through with that.

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- We were at the ice cream
social at the Fellowship Hall,

124
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and I was part of the variety show,

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and that's where we fell in love.

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- Yes, he did the Mary Magdalene song

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from Jesus Christ Superstar.

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What was that song called again, honey?

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- "I Don't know How To Love Him."

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- [Angie] Church people.

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- I fell in love youth pastor.

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I married right away.

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Six months later,

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I had a baby.

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All at the age of 17.

136
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- What about that Stewart boy?

137
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He's a nice man.

138
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- Well,

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he's 45.

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Been divorced twice, but
he's had some bad luck.

141
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- Well, that's what you get
for marrying a Methodist.

142
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- Better find yourself a
fella before it's too late.

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- She's right.

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Once that first cat gets in your house,

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it can go downhill fast.

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- Right.

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You don't wanna end up like Blanche.

148
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- That was the worst potato
salad I ever had at a funeral.

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- [Both] Sad.

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- [Angie] And more church people.

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- I met my wife at a church function

152
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and I asked her God-fearing
wonderful Lutheran parents

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for permission to begin a courtship.

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Now we fell in love and
promptly were married,

155
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and seven months later she
gave birth to our daughter,

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and just like that, we
are a Christian family.

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Later that year, she
graduated high school,

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and began the life that
God had planned for her

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as a loving wife and mother.

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And it all happened when
we made the decision

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to go to that same church
social on a Wednesday night

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all those years ago.

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For all the singles in our congregation,

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we're having an ice cream
social this coming Wednesday

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in the Fellowship Hall.

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- [Clint] I have had all
types of advice on this

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from all types of people.

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Teachers.

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- Basically, I don't believe in love.

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It's trivial.

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I've had several men fall in love with me,

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and it usually ends as
quickly as it began.

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Their wives find out.

174
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- [Clint] College professors.

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- Love

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is

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divine.

178
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Quite literally,

179
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a divination of the God above

180
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parlayed upon his specimen here on Earth.

181
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- Remus?

182
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I do respect you as a man,
as a man of intelligence,

183
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but I must

184
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respectfully disagree.

185
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(groans)

186
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For I must caution the
viewers against love,

187
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as it is nothing but lust in disguise.

188
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(groans)

189
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For our Neanderthal brain all
the way up to the singularity,

190
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it is nothing but a trick to get us

191
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to co-mingle and procreate.

192
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- Pemus, if love were simply
to propagate the species

193
00:08:05,920 --> 00:08:08,123
by way of procreation,

194
00:08:08,123 --> 00:08:10,632
why then does it feel so good

195
00:08:10,632 --> 00:08:13,738
when my wife pegs my butthole?

196
00:08:13,738 --> 00:08:16,891
- Remus, the same reason
why it feels so good

197
00:08:16,891 --> 00:08:19,096
for a grown woman to squeeze my face

198
00:08:19,096 --> 00:08:21,842
between her thick thighs.

199
00:08:21,842 --> 00:08:23,508
Because we're fetish freaks.

200
00:08:23,508 --> 00:08:25,086
- [Director] All right, cut!

201
00:08:25,086 --> 00:08:27,753
Take five, everybody, take five.

202
00:08:29,462 --> 00:08:31,070
- Man, I thought we'd
be out of here by now.

203
00:08:31,070 --> 00:08:32,419
- I know.

204
00:08:32,419 --> 00:08:33,750
Well, it takes forever.

205
00:08:33,750 --> 00:08:35,903
These guys don't know what the
hell they're talking about.

206
00:08:35,903 --> 00:08:36,824
- Right?
- Yeah.

207
00:08:36,824 --> 00:08:39,912
- It's like they're two professors
talking about how you can

208
00:08:39,912 --> 00:08:42,135
learn about love from some book.

209
00:08:42,135 --> 00:08:44,509
Like that's the answer
to, if that was real--

210
00:08:44,509 --> 00:08:46,059
- Yeah.
- I think we would all be

211
00:08:46,059 --> 00:08:47,797
perfectly happy right now.
- Exactly.

212
00:08:47,797 --> 00:08:51,407
- It doesn't make any sense.
- You can't define love.

213
00:08:51,407 --> 00:08:53,404
- Right, that's what I
try to tell everyone.

214
00:08:53,404 --> 00:08:54,885
- It's an experience.

215
00:08:54,885 --> 00:08:58,544
Like, you can't just
quantify love with a manual.

216
00:08:58,544 --> 00:08:59,456
- Exactly.

217
00:08:59,456 --> 00:09:01,145
- It's not, it's poetry.

218
00:09:01,145 --> 00:09:03,767
It's not linear, it's, it's experiences.

219
00:09:03,767 --> 00:09:08,702
It's people, it's connecting
on some intimate level

220
00:09:08,702 --> 00:09:10,518
you just can't write about,
you can't read about it.

221
00:09:10,518 --> 00:09:12,185
You have to feel it.

222
00:09:13,794 --> 00:09:14,659
- We should be doing what they're doing.

223
00:09:14,659 --> 00:09:15,848
- I know. (laughing)
- I mean--

224
00:09:15,848 --> 00:09:17,710
- Well, you should.
- What?

225
00:09:17,710 --> 00:09:18,543
- Nothing.

226
00:09:19,417 --> 00:09:22,000
(mellow music)

227
00:09:23,941 --> 00:09:28,074
- Do you maybe, are you,
are you free this weekend?

228
00:09:28,074 --> 00:09:31,009
It just sounds like we
have a lot of the same

229
00:09:31,009 --> 00:09:32,066
thoughts on stuff.

230
00:09:32,066 --> 00:09:33,593
It would be nice to

231
00:09:33,593 --> 00:09:36,120
talk to someone.
- You know what, yeah, I am.

232
00:09:36,120 --> 00:09:37,203
I am free.

233
00:09:37,203 --> 00:09:38,645
Yeah, that sounds good.

234
00:09:38,645 --> 00:09:40,063
- Cool.

235
00:09:40,063 --> 00:09:42,789
(mellow music)

236
00:09:42,789 --> 00:09:44,081
- [Director] Look alive, people.

237
00:09:44,081 --> 00:09:45,581
Five, four, three.

238
00:09:46,551 --> 00:09:48,725
Ready and action.

239
00:09:48,725 --> 00:09:50,458
- Shall we name them off?

240
00:09:50,458 --> 00:09:54,340
Jimmies, rubbers, raincoats, sheepskin,

241
00:09:54,340 --> 00:09:56,555
you can use almost anything.

242
00:09:56,555 --> 00:09:58,578
- So long as you don't stick your willy

243
00:09:58,578 --> 00:10:01,960
in the laminator at your
middle school on lunch break,

244
00:10:01,960 --> 00:10:05,267
you can have safe sex
without ruining your cock.

245
00:10:05,267 --> 00:10:07,123
- Like we did.

246
00:10:07,123 --> 00:10:09,421
- [Clint] And drunks.

247
00:10:09,421 --> 00:10:11,949
- All you have to do is
meet a girl at the bar.

248
00:10:11,949 --> 00:10:15,833
I don't discriminate: white, fat, Asian.

249
00:10:15,833 --> 00:10:18,019
- Asian, yeah, (chuckles) Asian.

250
00:10:18,019 --> 00:10:20,165
- I'll fuck a Pokémon if she look good.

251
00:10:20,165 --> 00:10:21,581
- Damn right.

252
00:10:21,581 --> 00:10:24,202
Look, you meet someone at
the bar, take them home,

253
00:10:24,202 --> 00:10:26,655
all you have to do is have sex.

254
00:10:26,655 --> 00:10:27,488
- Tear it up.

255
00:10:27,488 --> 00:10:28,383
No man.

256
00:10:28,383 --> 00:10:30,103
- You right man.
- That's all.

257
00:10:30,103 --> 00:10:32,476
- Have some sex, have some kids.

258
00:10:32,476 --> 00:10:34,918
Get pinned on child support.
- Hey.

259
00:10:34,918 --> 00:10:37,646
Extended-stay hotels the
rest of your life, dude.

260
00:10:37,646 --> 00:10:39,890
- What Joe Rogan said.

261
00:10:39,890 --> 00:10:42,740
(mellow music)

262
00:10:42,740 --> 00:10:44,830
- [Angie] I have never been in love.

263
00:10:44,830 --> 00:10:47,414
So I really don't know
what it would be like.

264
00:10:47,414 --> 00:10:49,816
People just always say you'll know.

265
00:10:49,816 --> 00:10:52,704
It's like that song by Skott Green.

266
00:10:52,704 --> 00:10:54,662
He's a musician from here.

267
00:10:54,662 --> 00:10:57,312
He's in a band, Dead Writer.

268
00:10:57,312 --> 00:11:00,762
He has a song that is
called Love Struck Sick.

269
00:11:00,762 --> 00:11:05,012
Love that song, but there's
just something missing.

270
00:11:06,662 --> 00:11:08,808
- [Clint] I don't know what
it means to be in love.

271
00:11:08,808 --> 00:11:10,574
I've never been in love.

272
00:11:10,574 --> 00:11:14,992
From what I've been told,
I'll know when it happens.

273
00:11:14,992 --> 00:11:16,940
I wanna fall in love at first sight.

274
00:11:16,940 --> 00:11:18,771
It just seems like the easiest way.

275
00:11:18,771 --> 00:11:20,112
Right away.

276
00:11:20,112 --> 00:11:24,302
The least amount of work
like winning the lottery.

277
00:11:24,302 --> 00:11:26,790
- [Angie] Tonight, I am
at the Catacombs Lounge

278
00:11:26,790 --> 00:11:29,916
below Galleria de Paco in Waterloo, Iowa

279
00:11:29,916 --> 00:11:32,102
waiting for my date.

280
00:11:32,102 --> 00:11:34,301
- [Clint] Tonight, I'm
at the Galleria de Paco

281
00:11:34,301 --> 00:11:37,805
in Waterloo, Iowa waiting for my date.

282
00:11:37,805 --> 00:11:40,913
- [Both] Who knows, this could be the one.

283
00:11:40,913 --> 00:11:43,639
(mellow music)

284
00:11:43,639 --> 00:11:45,957
- [Angie] Did he say a different night?

285
00:11:45,957 --> 00:11:47,495
He is an older guy.

286
00:11:47,495 --> 00:11:50,413
He's probably got a lot going on.

287
00:11:50,413 --> 00:11:52,587
Is this the right place?

288
00:11:52,587 --> 00:11:54,601
- [Clint] She is an older woman.

289
00:11:54,601 --> 00:11:56,967
Maybe she's running late.

290
00:11:56,967 --> 00:11:59,731
She did say Galleria de Paco, right?

291
00:11:59,731 --> 00:12:03,765
- [Angie] He seemed nice
when he asked me out.

292
00:12:03,765 --> 00:12:05,098
He's not coming.

293
00:12:06,676 --> 00:12:08,259
I've been stood up.

294
00:12:09,670 --> 00:12:10,587
This hurts.

295
00:12:12,557 --> 00:12:15,209
- [Clint] (groans) Christian Mingle sucks.

296
00:12:15,209 --> 00:12:17,839
I'm trying farmersonly.com next time.

297
00:12:17,839 --> 00:12:20,328
Brock said something about Grindr?

298
00:12:20,328 --> 00:12:22,295
I don't know about that.

299
00:12:22,295 --> 00:12:23,841
That's it.

300
00:12:23,841 --> 00:12:25,839
I'm officially stood up.

301
00:12:25,839 --> 00:12:26,901
I'm gonna go drink,

302
00:12:26,901 --> 00:12:29,823
and then get the Uber
Jew to drive me home.

303
00:12:29,823 --> 00:12:32,406
(mellow music)

304
00:12:40,661 --> 00:12:43,055
♪ Now I'm walking again ♪

305
00:12:43,055 --> 00:12:45,484
♪ To the beat of a drum ♪

306
00:12:45,484 --> 00:12:50,484
♪ And I'm counting the steps
to the door of your heart ♪

307
00:12:51,985 --> 00:12:55,015
♪ Only shadows ahead ♪

308
00:12:55,015 --> 00:12:57,381
♪ Barely clearing the roof ♪

309
00:12:57,381 --> 00:13:02,381
♪ Get to know the feeling
of liberation and release ♪

310
00:13:03,043 --> 00:13:04,639
- [Vincent] I'd recommend a Scotch.

311
00:13:04,639 --> 00:13:06,197
In fact, get this gentleman a 15-year-old

312
00:13:06,197 --> 00:13:08,801
Glenfiddich on the rocks, and
I'll have another as well.

313
00:13:08,801 --> 00:13:10,390
- [Bartender] All right,
you got it, Vincent.

314
00:13:10,390 --> 00:13:11,793
- Thank you, Vincent, is it?

315
00:13:11,793 --> 00:13:14,415
- Vincent, yes indeed.
- Very nice to meet you.

316
00:13:14,415 --> 00:13:16,401
Are you by chance The Don?

317
00:13:16,401 --> 00:13:18,697
- Yes, some people do call me The Don.

318
00:13:18,697 --> 00:13:20,799
You know, I don't mind
that nickname that much.

319
00:13:20,799 --> 00:13:23,107
When I was a youngster about your age,

320
00:13:23,107 --> 00:13:25,615
there was a banker in my hometown

321
00:13:25,615 --> 00:13:28,948
that bought me my first glass of Scotch.

322
00:13:31,259 --> 00:13:32,092
Thank you.

323
00:13:32,092 --> 00:13:33,181
- Where are you from?

324
00:13:33,181 --> 00:13:34,427
- Oelwein.

325
00:13:34,427 --> 00:13:36,011
Oelwein, Iowa.

326
00:13:36,011 --> 00:13:38,425
The banker's name was Don Bennachie.

327
00:13:38,425 --> 00:13:40,788
He owned and operated
the Maynard Savings Bank.

328
00:13:40,788 --> 00:13:44,297
It was in Hazleton, a little
ways away from Oelwein.

329
00:13:44,297 --> 00:13:45,130
He was a

330
00:13:45,130 --> 00:13:46,880
consummate gentleman.

331
00:13:47,745 --> 00:13:50,499
He was the only one that
would extend a mortgage

332
00:13:50,499 --> 00:13:53,323
to my mom and dad on our home.

333
00:13:53,323 --> 00:13:57,303
But (sighs) the summer between
my junior and senior year,

334
00:13:57,303 --> 00:13:58,709
my father

335
00:13:58,709 --> 00:14:01,303
suffered from a sudden heart attack.

336
00:14:01,303 --> 00:14:02,470
And I was real

337
00:14:03,991 --> 00:14:04,969
mixed up.

338
00:14:04,969 --> 00:14:06,401
I had been crying for about

339
00:14:06,401 --> 00:14:08,427
three weeks, you know.

340
00:14:08,427 --> 00:14:09,260
And

341
00:14:10,897 --> 00:14:12,665
I was so confused, I
didn't know what to do.

342
00:14:12,665 --> 00:14:13,747
And I finally decided

343
00:14:13,747 --> 00:14:16,103
the only thing I'm gonna be
able to do is to quit college.

344
00:14:16,103 --> 00:14:17,993
I'm gonna have to quit college,
I'm gonna have to get a job,

345
00:14:17,993 --> 00:14:19,057
and I'm gonna have to help my mom out

346
00:14:19,057 --> 00:14:21,203
any way that I possibly can.

347
00:14:21,203 --> 00:14:24,207
And then the door to the
Paddock Lounge opens,

348
00:14:24,207 --> 00:14:27,085
and all that mid-afternoon Iowa sunshine

349
00:14:27,085 --> 00:14:29,765
pours through and in walks

350
00:14:29,765 --> 00:14:31,551
Don Bennachie.

351
00:14:31,551 --> 00:14:33,079
Oh, and he was a sharp looking guy.

352
00:14:33,079 --> 00:14:36,205
Had a blue suit, you know,
cuff links, wingtip shoes,

353
00:14:36,205 --> 00:14:40,291
monogrammed shirt collars,
and twin cloth handkerchiefs,

354
00:14:40,291 --> 00:14:43,791
monogrammed DWB, Donald William Bennachie.

355
00:14:44,679 --> 00:14:45,512
- Wow.

356
00:14:45,512 --> 00:14:47,823
- See, he'd heard from my mom

357
00:14:47,823 --> 00:14:49,857
that I was planning on quitting school.

358
00:14:49,857 --> 00:14:51,936
So, he comes up to the bar,
and he scoots a stool up,

359
00:14:51,936 --> 00:14:55,118
and the bartender gives him
a Cutty Sark on the rocks.

360
00:14:55,118 --> 00:14:56,925
So, he orders a second glass of Cutty,

361
00:14:56,925 --> 00:14:58,387
and he puts it in front of me,

362
00:14:58,387 --> 00:15:01,769
and he says, "Here you go, this is Scotch.

363
00:15:01,769 --> 00:15:04,277
"This is a gentleman's drink."

364
00:15:04,277 --> 00:15:06,474
He says, "I wanna talk
to you about school."

365
00:15:06,474 --> 00:15:09,190
He says, "Your father is
a very intelligent man,

366
00:15:09,190 --> 00:15:12,010
"and he made sure that he
had certain things in place.

367
00:15:12,010 --> 00:15:14,786
"He understood the
importance of life insurance.

368
00:15:14,786 --> 00:15:16,572
"So, he made sure that if
anything happened to him,

369
00:15:16,572 --> 00:15:20,316
"that you and your mother
would be taken care of."

370
00:15:20,316 --> 00:15:24,002
And he told me what a
great guy my father was,

371
00:15:24,002 --> 00:15:26,669
how much that he would miss him,

372
00:15:27,630 --> 00:15:30,642
and he told me that
everything would be okay.

373
00:15:30,642 --> 00:15:31,475
So, I...

374
00:15:33,282 --> 00:15:34,865
I finished college.

375
00:15:35,934 --> 00:15:37,804
And that's where I got my nickname.

376
00:15:37,804 --> 00:15:41,310
You know, I was this Italian
kid from Oelwein, Iowa,

377
00:15:41,310 --> 00:15:43,448
and all of my dorm mates, they'd seen

378
00:15:43,448 --> 00:15:46,878
way too many of those mafia movies,

379
00:15:46,878 --> 00:15:50,592
so they called me The Don as a joke.

380
00:15:50,592 --> 00:15:52,738
But you know, I didn't...

381
00:15:52,738 --> 00:15:54,636
I didn't mind it that much.

382
00:15:54,636 --> 00:15:56,758
'Cause every time I heard it,

383
00:15:56,758 --> 00:16:00,591
it reminded me of our
family friend, you know.

384
00:16:01,650 --> 00:16:04,817
Then when I graduated, Don handed me a

385
00:16:05,752 --> 00:16:08,099
plain card, you know,

386
00:16:08,099 --> 00:16:11,423
cash inside, but he'd
written only one line:

387
00:16:11,423 --> 00:16:14,006
"Your father would be so proud.

388
00:16:15,558 --> 00:16:16,391
"DWB."

389
00:16:17,313 --> 00:16:19,896
(mellow music)

390
00:16:21,057 --> 00:16:23,842
So, keep your head up, Clint.

391
00:16:23,842 --> 00:16:27,693
You might wanna see about a hair cut.

392
00:16:27,693 --> 00:16:30,276
(mellow music)

393
00:16:48,712 --> 00:16:53,712
♪ It's time I said these words ♪

394
00:16:55,680 --> 00:17:00,680
♪ I had to write them down ♪

395
00:17:02,546 --> 00:17:07,546
♪ Tonight we'll talk like birds ♪

396
00:17:08,318 --> 00:17:11,344
♪ I found you ♪

397
00:17:11,344 --> 00:17:15,300
♪ And my heart starts to pound ♪

398
00:17:15,300 --> 00:17:18,806
♪ The river's long ♪

399
00:17:18,806 --> 00:17:22,299
♪ We'll meet in the middle and swim ♪

400
00:17:22,299 --> 00:17:25,762
♪ I almost drown ♪

401
00:17:25,762 --> 00:17:30,762
♪ Now I'm breathing again ♪

402
00:17:30,797 --> 00:17:35,797
♪ When my world starts spinning round ♪

403
00:17:37,709 --> 00:17:42,709
♪ When my bonfire lights the wind ♪

404
00:17:44,825 --> 00:17:49,825
♪ When my feet fly off the ground ♪

405
00:17:50,634 --> 00:17:54,484
♪ You met me ♪

406
00:17:54,484 --> 00:17:56,984
♪ I found you ♪

407
00:18:13,406 --> 00:18:18,406
♪ You've got a lot of nerve ♪

408
00:18:20,557 --> 00:18:25,557
♪ To make my rain cloud burst ♪

409
00:18:27,595 --> 00:18:32,595
♪ It's not an easy task, I've heard ♪

410
00:18:33,161 --> 00:18:36,367
♪ Dropped in a play ♪

411
00:18:36,367 --> 00:18:40,592
♪ And it's unrehearsed ♪

412
00:18:40,592 --> 00:18:43,341
♪ The river's strong ♪

413
00:18:43,341 --> 00:18:46,849
♪ We'll meet in the middle and swim ♪

414
00:18:46,849 --> 00:18:50,136
♪ I almost drown ♪

415
00:18:50,136 --> 00:18:55,136
♪ Now I'm breathing again ♪

416
00:18:55,292 --> 00:19:00,292
♪ When my world starts spinning round ♪

417
00:19:02,365 --> 00:19:07,365
♪ When the bonfire lights the wind ♪

418
00:19:09,391 --> 00:19:14,391
♪ When my feet fly off the ground ♪

419
00:19:15,288 --> 00:19:18,900
♪ You met me ♪

420
00:19:18,900 --> 00:19:22,464
♪ I found you ♪

421
00:19:22,464 --> 00:19:26,398
♪ I love you ♪

422
00:19:26,398 --> 00:19:30,315
♪ I've fallen love struck sick ♪

423
00:19:35,678 --> 00:19:38,331
- [Producer] Hey Skott, what do you think?

424
00:19:38,331 --> 00:19:39,508
- I like it.

425
00:19:39,508 --> 00:19:41,437
I don't know, there feels like there's

426
00:19:41,437 --> 00:19:44,097
still something missing on this song.

427
00:19:44,097 --> 00:19:48,248
♪ Soon as I get my head round you ♪

428
00:19:48,248 --> 00:19:49,594
- [Angie] This is the Lava Lounge

429
00:19:49,594 --> 00:19:52,563
on the corner of Falls Avenue
and Ansborough in Waterloo,

430
00:19:52,563 --> 00:19:56,086
Iowa, right next to the
famous Rudy's Tacos.

431
00:19:56,086 --> 00:19:59,561
♪ Living just won't do ♪

432
00:19:59,561 --> 00:20:00,978
- Pretty in Pink?

433
00:20:02,278 --> 00:20:05,673
Gotta say, I'm more of
a Mannequin guy myself.

434
00:20:05,673 --> 00:20:07,248
- [Angie] This is Harry the Hipster.

435
00:20:07,248 --> 00:20:09,204
(bell dings)
He prefers Harold.

436
00:20:09,204 --> 00:20:10,722
He is here every Friday.

437
00:20:10,722 --> 00:20:13,068
He just moved back from
Des Moines recently.

438
00:20:13,068 --> 00:20:15,828
He lived in a loft above Gong Food He,

439
00:20:15,828 --> 00:20:17,661
but they went out of business recently,

440
00:20:17,661 --> 00:20:19,869
and a Starbucks took over that location.

441
00:20:19,869 --> 00:20:22,791
Also, an Applebee's
opened across the street.

442
00:20:22,791 --> 00:20:25,159
Harold promptly moved back to Waterloo.

443
00:20:25,159 --> 00:20:28,459
He now lives in a
post-World War II bungalow,

444
00:20:28,459 --> 00:20:31,519
original kitchen in pristine condition.

445
00:20:31,519 --> 00:20:33,019
Harold is content.

446
00:20:33,923 --> 00:20:36,006
- Come on, man, McCarthy?

447
00:20:37,371 --> 00:20:39,148
- Always.
- He was crossing

448
00:20:39,148 --> 00:20:42,874
boundaries on this, social economics, man.

449
00:20:42,874 --> 00:20:45,450
John Hughes, he was, you know,

450
00:20:45,450 --> 00:20:49,033
getting the punks and
the elitists together

451
00:20:50,229 --> 00:20:54,964
to go ahead and realize
they didn't have too much

452
00:20:54,964 --> 00:20:56,797
apart from each other.

453
00:20:58,481 --> 00:21:00,731
What did Mannequin ever do?

454
00:21:01,679 --> 00:21:02,762
- Inspire me.

455
00:21:05,142 --> 00:21:06,892
Love knows no bounds.

456
00:21:07,751 --> 00:21:09,683
Not even a mannequin.

457
00:21:09,683 --> 00:21:10,892
- Bros?

458
00:21:10,892 --> 00:21:12,627
- What's up?
- Hey that guy,

459
00:21:12,627 --> 00:21:15,571
That guy looks a lot like you.

460
00:21:15,571 --> 00:21:17,537
- [Man] Shut up, that
fucking pickle kisser?

461
00:21:17,537 --> 00:21:18,370
- Yeah.

462
00:21:21,155 --> 00:21:23,073
- [Crowd] Brock!

463
00:21:23,073 --> 00:21:25,203
- Just less, you know,

464
00:21:25,203 --> 00:21:26,370
beard attempt.

465
00:21:27,273 --> 00:21:28,950
- [Man] Coolness.

466
00:21:28,950 --> 00:21:29,931
- Surely.

467
00:21:29,931 --> 00:21:32,393
- A regular fucking James Dean.

468
00:21:32,393 --> 00:21:34,555
- You're no McCarthy

469
00:21:34,555 --> 00:21:36,809
in Weekend at Bernie's 2.

470
00:21:36,809 --> 00:21:39,463
♪ Me to blame ♪

471
00:21:39,463 --> 00:21:41,167
♪ Makes you wanna feel ♪

472
00:21:41,167 --> 00:21:42,833
♪ Makes you wanna try ♪

473
00:21:42,833 --> 00:21:46,015
♪ Makes you wanna blow
the stars from the sky ♪

474
00:21:46,015 --> 00:21:48,953
- I just had to defend
a public masturbator.

475
00:21:48,953 --> 00:21:50,701
A public masturbator!

476
00:21:50,701 --> 00:21:52,793
- [Angie] This is Abigail.

477
00:21:52,793 --> 00:21:54,323
She works as a public defender now.

478
00:21:54,323 --> 00:21:56,657
She went to Drake University Law School.

479
00:21:56,657 --> 00:21:59,150
She moved back here after her divorce.

480
00:21:59,150 --> 00:22:01,096
She watches over her grandmother.

481
00:22:01,096 --> 00:22:04,246
She is the best council
anyone could ask for.

482
00:22:04,246 --> 00:22:05,900
People at the courthouse call her

483
00:22:05,900 --> 00:22:06,869
The Honey Badger.

484
00:22:06,869 --> 00:22:08,730
- Like really?

485
00:22:08,730 --> 00:22:11,067
- Yeah.
- Son of a bitch.

486
00:22:11,067 --> 00:22:12,242
- [Angie] This is Lily.

487
00:22:12,242 --> 00:22:14,082
She is a political analyst.

488
00:22:14,082 --> 00:22:16,808
- I went on a date with an agnostic

489
00:22:16,808 --> 00:22:18,891
from Missouri last night.

490
00:22:20,730 --> 00:22:22,313
Literal perfection.

491
00:22:23,201 --> 00:22:27,421
I mean, a guy from the Show
Me State that believes,

492
00:22:27,421 --> 00:22:31,254
that believes, there is
a God if you show him.

493
00:22:33,493 --> 00:22:34,919
- [Clint] This is the Beer Hall,

494
00:22:34,919 --> 00:22:37,250
on the corner of Falls
Avenue and Ansborough,

495
00:22:37,250 --> 00:22:39,761
in Waterloo, Iowa, within
the Falls Avenue Mall,

496
00:22:39,761 --> 00:22:42,322
right next to the famous Rudy's Tacos.

497
00:22:42,322 --> 00:22:44,739
- Oh, what a day, what a day.

498
00:22:46,197 --> 00:22:48,030
Throw two coaches out,

499
00:22:49,057 --> 00:22:52,057
couple fans come at me at half-time,

500
00:22:53,302 --> 00:22:55,752
two technicals on the players.

501
00:22:55,752 --> 00:22:57,421
We got somebody keeping score

502
00:22:57,421 --> 00:23:00,352
that's never been to a
basketball game before.

503
00:23:00,352 --> 00:23:03,631
Junior high girl's basketball
has become a bloodsport.

504
00:23:03,631 --> 00:23:05,881
(laughing)

505
00:23:08,148 --> 00:23:10,025
- What do you got today?

506
00:23:10,025 --> 00:23:14,048
- I got, I gotta get off to
my next, my next set of games.

507
00:23:14,048 --> 00:23:15,334
- What do you got?

508
00:23:15,334 --> 00:23:18,167
- I got volleyball tonight.

509
00:23:18,167 --> 00:23:19,258
- Is that hard?

510
00:23:19,258 --> 00:23:20,697
- Oh, it's really hard.

511
00:23:20,697 --> 00:23:22,820
You can't get caught
looking at the girls' asses

512
00:23:22,820 --> 00:23:24,697
in them tight shorts.

513
00:23:24,697 --> 00:23:27,308
You occasionally gotta
get a line call right,

514
00:23:27,308 --> 00:23:29,124
and then they expect
me to stay sober enough

515
00:23:29,124 --> 00:23:30,758
to climb up on that damn pole.

516
00:23:30,758 --> 00:23:32,666
(laughing)

517
00:23:32,666 --> 00:23:33,807
I'm outta here.

518
00:23:33,807 --> 00:23:36,723
- Good luck, Glenn.
- Good luck, Glenn.

519
00:23:36,723 --> 00:23:38,784
- So, I started Fighter Body this week.

520
00:23:38,784 --> 00:23:41,314
Shit's fucking intense, man.

521
00:23:41,314 --> 00:23:45,432
I've done like 150
squats, like 75 burpees.

522
00:23:45,432 --> 00:23:46,740
- Whoa, whoa, whoa, burpees?

523
00:23:46,740 --> 00:23:48,602
What the hell is a burpee?

524
00:23:48,602 --> 00:23:50,616
- A burpee is a full on pushup

525
00:23:50,616 --> 00:23:51,809
all the way down to the ground,

526
00:23:51,809 --> 00:23:54,907
stand up, jump, and then back down.

527
00:23:54,907 --> 00:23:58,227
- Sounds like too much work for me.

528
00:23:58,227 --> 00:24:01,932
- So, you trying to fit into
a bridesmaid dress, or what?

529
00:24:01,932 --> 00:24:04,300
- Hope it's not that ugly,
strapless, form shit.

530
00:24:04,300 --> 00:24:07,695
Man, that shit is ugly.
- (laughs) Yeah, no kidding.

531
00:24:07,695 --> 00:24:11,007
- No, I'm just turning
30, and I wanna look good.

532
00:24:11,007 --> 00:24:12,788
- I'll be honest, you already look good.

533
00:24:12,788 --> 00:24:15,009
I'll fuck you right now.
- Yeah, yeah, you're right.

534
00:24:15,009 --> 00:24:18,134
- Evening gentlemen.
- Hey, look at the hair.

535
00:24:18,134 --> 00:24:19,756
Oh God, that looks great.

536
00:24:19,756 --> 00:24:22,884
- [Clint] This is my uncle, The Boss.

537
00:24:22,884 --> 00:24:24,368
Most uncles sell cars,

538
00:24:24,368 --> 00:24:27,048
work in a bank, or manage
a restaurant somewhere.

539
00:24:27,048 --> 00:24:28,349
Mine though?

540
00:24:28,349 --> 00:24:29,784
Smut merchant.

541
00:24:29,784 --> 00:24:30,946
- Hair looking good, finally.

542
00:24:30,946 --> 00:24:32,203
- [Cling] This is Brock.

543
00:24:32,203 --> 00:24:34,574
Or as he likes to refer to himself as

544
00:24:34,574 --> 00:24:35,991
- Brock the Cock.

545
00:24:37,432 --> 00:24:40,535
- I refuse to address him as this.

546
00:24:40,535 --> 00:24:41,630
He's an alpha male.

547
00:24:41,630 --> 00:24:43,308
The type of guy who slaps
his date on the butt,

548
00:24:43,308 --> 00:24:45,687
and tells bartenders
they need to smile more.

549
00:24:45,687 --> 00:24:46,856
But

550
00:24:46,856 --> 00:24:48,102
he's gay.

551
00:24:48,102 --> 00:24:49,435
So, he gets away with it all.

552
00:24:49,435 --> 00:24:53,336
Toxic masculinity complex is
acceptable for a homosexual.

553
00:24:53,336 --> 00:24:57,223
He's like a UN ambassador
with diplomatic immunity.

554
00:24:57,223 --> 00:24:59,662
American gay men are a
protected species now,

555
00:24:59,662 --> 00:25:01,166
like bald eagles.

556
00:25:01,166 --> 00:25:05,642
It goes bald eagle, snow owl,
North American homosexual.

557
00:25:05,642 --> 00:25:06,746
Thank you, thank you.

558
00:25:06,746 --> 00:25:07,883
Hey, can I get a Scotch?

559
00:25:07,883 --> 00:25:09,521
- Whoa!

560
00:25:09,521 --> 00:25:10,576
Scotch?
- Drinking like a man

561
00:25:10,576 --> 00:25:11,658
and a new haircut?

562
00:25:11,658 --> 00:25:13,121
Did you go to the barber
and tell him, "Hey,

563
00:25:13,121 --> 00:25:14,971
"I wanna quit looking like an asshole?"

564
00:25:14,971 --> 00:25:17,122
- Well, you know what,

565
00:25:17,122 --> 00:25:21,180
both of these changes came
from one very influential man.

566
00:25:21,180 --> 00:25:22,952
- [Brock] I'd like to think it was me.

567
00:25:22,952 --> 00:25:24,030
- You know, actually,

568
00:25:24,030 --> 00:25:26,929
he was joking on your
hair earlier about the,

569
00:25:26,929 --> 00:25:28,990
what was that, the--
- Well, you know, seriously.

570
00:25:28,990 --> 00:25:31,484
- The 80s movie with the--
- Okay, seriously,

571
00:25:31,484 --> 00:25:33,839
I wanted to say that you
look like Rocky Dennis

572
00:25:33,839 --> 00:25:35,786
with the hair, where you're like,

573
00:25:35,786 --> 00:25:37,844
"Things that I like."
- Oh, come on.

574
00:25:37,844 --> 00:25:38,677
- Yeah.
- "The sun on my face."

575
00:25:38,677 --> 00:25:39,510
- You gotta be kidding me.

576
00:25:39,510 --> 00:25:43,528
- "Things that I don't
like, the snap of a camera,

577
00:25:43,528 --> 00:25:46,368
"the horrified sounds of a crowd."

578
00:25:46,368 --> 00:25:49,383
- What was that, was it Mask?
- It was the Mask, yeah.

579
00:25:49,383 --> 00:25:50,683
- Cher was in that.

580
00:25:50,683 --> 00:25:52,348
Who was the, who was the guy?

581
00:25:52,348 --> 00:25:54,213
He just was up for the Oscar.

582
00:25:54,213 --> 00:25:55,763
Was it Sam Elliot?
- Sam Elliot.

583
00:25:55,763 --> 00:25:57,709
- Yeah.
- Yeah, it was Sam Elliot.

584
00:25:57,709 --> 00:25:58,721
- Yeah.

585
00:25:58,721 --> 00:25:59,938
We're gonna go to Europe, man.

586
00:25:59,938 --> 00:26:01,650
(laughing)

587
00:26:01,650 --> 00:26:02,940
Yeah, he was, he was doing the--

588
00:26:02,940 --> 00:26:05,587
- You can go anywhere you want, baby.

589
00:26:05,587 --> 00:26:06,817
- God that was sad at the end.

590
00:26:06,817 --> 00:26:08,506
But yeah, he was joking on your hair.

591
00:26:08,506 --> 00:26:09,339
- Nah, fuck that man.

592
00:26:09,339 --> 00:26:10,314
It was the end of fucking Frankenstein

593
00:26:10,314 --> 00:26:12,365
that they should have had, the freak died.

594
00:26:12,365 --> 00:26:15,812
- Mom says I look like a lion.
- Well, she was lying.

595
00:26:15,812 --> 00:26:17,265
You look like a fucking monster.

596
00:26:17,265 --> 00:26:18,401
- What, you're drinking Scotch now?

597
00:26:18,401 --> 00:26:19,442
This is awesome.
- Yeah.

598
00:26:19,442 --> 00:26:20,275
- This is great.

599
00:26:20,275 --> 00:26:21,143
You got a haircut, you're drinking Scotch.

600
00:26:21,143 --> 00:26:21,985
I'm proud of you.

601
00:26:21,985 --> 00:26:22,917
This is good.

602
00:26:22,917 --> 00:26:24,309
- You know what,

603
00:26:24,309 --> 00:26:28,069
I was at Galleria de Paco--
- Oh God it's great, isn't it?

604
00:26:28,069 --> 00:26:31,795
- Yeah, yeah, for the most
part, but I got stood up there.

605
00:26:31,795 --> 00:26:34,347
- Oh, I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
- Yeah, yeah.

606
00:26:34,347 --> 00:26:36,165
I know that sucks, it sucks.

607
00:26:36,165 --> 00:26:37,143
There's nothing worse

608
00:26:37,143 --> 00:26:38,753
because I sit there, and I waste my time.

609
00:26:38,753 --> 00:26:41,120
- I've never had a bad date there.

610
00:26:41,120 --> 00:26:42,711
- That's a good place to eat.

611
00:26:42,711 --> 00:26:45,609
- I went downstairs, and I
ran into The Don, actually.

612
00:26:45,609 --> 00:26:46,988
- Ooh.

613
00:26:46,988 --> 00:26:48,027
Really?
- Good man.

614
00:26:48,027 --> 00:26:48,860
- Yeah.

615
00:26:48,860 --> 00:26:49,900
- You made friends with The Don.

616
00:26:49,900 --> 00:26:50,733
- Yeah.

617
00:26:50,733 --> 00:26:53,799
He's the one who advised the haircut and

618
00:26:53,799 --> 00:26:57,139
introduced me to this fine--
- So being stood up

619
00:26:57,139 --> 00:26:58,966
was the best thing that
could have happened to you

620
00:26:58,966 --> 00:26:59,942
if you made friends with The Don.

621
00:26:59,942 --> 00:27:02,305
Those are the people you
need to know in this time.

622
00:27:02,305 --> 00:27:03,138
I'm proud of you.

623
00:27:03,138 --> 00:27:04,668
That's great.

624
00:27:04,668 --> 00:27:06,872
That's a great man.
- Yeah.

625
00:27:06,872 --> 00:27:08,005
- Good work.

626
00:27:08,005 --> 00:27:09,821
So, what happened with the date?

627
00:27:09,821 --> 00:27:12,080
- She just, I don't know.
- No call, no show?

628
00:27:12,080 --> 00:27:13,214
- Yeah. (sighs)

629
00:27:13,214 --> 00:27:15,647
I didn't hear anything from her.

630
00:27:15,647 --> 00:27:16,868
She was an older lady.

631
00:27:16,868 --> 00:27:18,990
I don't know what was going on.

632
00:27:18,990 --> 00:27:20,208
- Cougar?

633
00:27:20,208 --> 00:27:23,411
- Yeah, I, I don't know if I
should ask about that, but--

634
00:27:23,411 --> 00:27:24,713
- Yeah, never really ask that.

635
00:27:24,713 --> 00:27:25,847
- Yeah.
- Seriously.

636
00:27:25,847 --> 00:27:27,096
- Brock, do you really, I mean, well--

637
00:27:27,096 --> 00:27:29,039
- And if she's too old,
dude, let's be honest.

638
00:27:29,039 --> 00:27:30,971
That's a fucking saber tooth tiger.

639
00:27:30,971 --> 00:27:33,721
That's prehistoric
pussy, don't go for that.

640
00:27:33,721 --> 00:27:35,443
- Do the gays have that?

641
00:27:35,443 --> 00:27:38,195
Do have, like, cougars, or
what do they do with the gays.

642
00:27:38,195 --> 00:27:39,811
- Yeah, there's some people that are like,

643
00:27:39,811 --> 00:27:42,614
one of the old gays, you know, and then,

644
00:27:42,614 --> 00:27:45,828
I usually say to them, uh,
they're like, "I'm 61 years old."

645
00:27:45,828 --> 00:27:47,970
I'm like, Jesus Christ, I didn't even know

646
00:27:47,970 --> 00:27:49,586
they made gay people back then.

647
00:27:49,586 --> 00:27:52,422
(laughing)

648
00:27:52,422 --> 00:27:53,626
- You go on a lot of dates.

649
00:27:53,626 --> 00:27:56,600
What is, yeah, I mean,
what is going on with that?

650
00:27:56,600 --> 00:27:59,845
I mean, what--
- I'm 23 years old, right.

651
00:27:59,845 --> 00:28:04,011
I, I feel like it's about time
I find my special someone.

652
00:28:04,011 --> 00:28:05,007
Let me ask you guys.

653
00:28:05,007 --> 00:28:06,729
Have either of you ever been in love?

654
00:28:06,729 --> 00:28:09,322
- I think I was once, I don't really know.

655
00:28:09,322 --> 00:28:10,155
- Yeah.

656
00:28:12,325 --> 00:28:13,921
Yeah, I was once.

657
00:28:13,921 --> 00:28:16,578
- You were in love?
- Yeah.

658
00:28:16,578 --> 00:28:18,415
- Wanna tell us about it?

659
00:28:18,415 --> 00:28:21,332
- The best five minutes of my life.

660
00:28:22,909 --> 00:28:25,522
(groaning) Oh God!

661
00:28:25,522 --> 00:28:26,355
- Eww.

662
00:28:28,753 --> 00:28:32,175
I don't know, don't be
so hard on yourself, man.

663
00:28:32,175 --> 00:28:33,898
Like I guess,

664
00:28:33,898 --> 00:28:36,817
you know when you know, like when

665
00:28:36,817 --> 00:28:39,253
that musician in town, that, that,

666
00:28:39,253 --> 00:28:42,929
that brilliant musician,
the guy that's in that band

667
00:28:42,929 --> 00:28:44,094
Dead Writer?

668
00:28:44,094 --> 00:28:45,144
- Skott Green.

669
00:28:45,144 --> 00:28:47,797
- Yeah, yeah, he has got
that song, what is it?

670
00:28:47,797 --> 00:28:49,291
"Lovesick Struck"? Or--

671
00:28:49,291 --> 00:28:50,131
- "Love Struck Sick."

672
00:28:50,131 --> 00:28:51,388
- "Love Struck Sick."

673
00:28:51,388 --> 00:28:53,699
- Yeah, he pretty much lays it out.

674
00:28:53,699 --> 00:28:55,327
- Captures the imagination
of the whole town.

675
00:28:55,327 --> 00:28:58,561
Mine is the glory hole
experience for me personally but,

676
00:28:58,561 --> 00:29:00,414
he does nail it.

677
00:29:00,414 --> 00:29:02,544
- Okay the glory hole is referring to,

678
00:29:02,544 --> 00:29:05,255
I can't confirm nor deny that it exists

679
00:29:05,255 --> 00:29:06,618
in one of my establishments--

680
00:29:06,618 --> 00:29:10,199
- Yeah but that's sort of
sense of being mysterious

681
00:29:10,199 --> 00:29:12,227
adds enough sexual
ambience to it, you know?

682
00:29:12,227 --> 00:29:13,907
- He spends so much
money down at that place,

683
00:29:13,907 --> 00:29:15,943
I can't confirm or deny that those exist--

684
00:29:15,943 --> 00:29:18,936
- Look man, I can't be banging
people at my house anymore,

685
00:29:18,936 --> 00:29:20,627
then they know where I live.

686
00:29:20,627 --> 00:29:22,409
- I can't confirm or
deny that this happens

687
00:29:22,409 --> 00:29:23,596
at one of my establishments.

688
00:29:23,596 --> 00:29:25,175
- Well, what's the legality
of having one of those

689
00:29:25,175 --> 00:29:26,645
in an establishment?
- I can't confirm or deny

690
00:29:26,645 --> 00:29:27,851
that this happens at one
of my establishments.

691
00:29:27,851 --> 00:29:28,684
- The legality?

692
00:29:28,684 --> 00:29:30,948
Let's just talk about how hot it is.

693
00:29:30,948 --> 00:29:32,460
- Hey, will you do it?

694
00:29:32,460 --> 00:29:33,293
- Do what?

695
00:29:33,293 --> 00:29:34,247
- Come on.

696
00:29:34,247 --> 00:29:36,755
Do the R Kelly.
- Yes, yes, do it.

697
00:29:36,755 --> 00:29:37,920
R Kelly man.

698
00:29:37,920 --> 00:29:39,860
- Sometimes you guys be racist, man.

699
00:29:39,860 --> 00:29:40,879
(all laughing)

700
00:29:40,879 --> 00:29:42,193
- Come on.
- Come on.

701
00:29:42,193 --> 00:29:43,789
- Do it.

702
00:29:43,789 --> 00:29:46,622
- They just want me to be a monster, man!

703
00:29:46,622 --> 00:29:48,008
I didn't do it man!

704
00:29:48,008 --> 00:29:49,669
All you have to do is go to Instagram

705
00:29:49,669 --> 00:29:51,853
and post a picture of R
Kelly stealing a puppy

706
00:29:51,853 --> 00:29:55,263
and everybody gonna say,
R Kelly is a monster.

707
00:29:55,263 --> 00:29:58,659
I don't have the money
to pay the child support.

708
00:29:58,659 --> 00:30:00,055
- I love it, man, I love it!

709
00:30:00,055 --> 00:30:03,951
- I'm 14, will you pee on me?
(laughing)

710
00:30:03,951 --> 00:30:08,951
- Well boys, I'm off to another
dick daggle, so they say.

711
00:30:09,292 --> 00:30:11,266
- I would shake your hand but--

712
00:30:11,266 --> 00:30:12,148
- [Brock] I wouldn't.

713
00:30:12,148 --> 00:30:15,565
- Have a good night Brock.
- See ya Brock.

714
00:30:17,133 --> 00:30:18,267
I like that guy.

715
00:30:18,267 --> 00:30:20,517
- What a character, my God.

716
00:30:21,543 --> 00:30:23,492
So you met The Don, huh?

717
00:30:23,492 --> 00:30:26,907
- Yeah, speaking of characters,
he's something else, man.

718
00:30:26,907 --> 00:30:27,820
He's something else.

719
00:30:27,820 --> 00:30:29,290
- Did he tell you any stories?

720
00:30:29,290 --> 00:30:30,842
- Yeah, actually.

721
00:30:30,842 --> 00:30:33,104
- Which one did he tell ya,
which one did he tell ya?

722
00:30:33,104 --> 00:30:36,735
- He hit me with the Don Bennachie one.

723
00:30:36,735 --> 00:30:39,453
- Yeah, that's a good one.

724
00:30:39,453 --> 00:30:40,840
He's told me that one before.

725
00:30:40,840 --> 00:30:42,940
You know I knew Don Bennachie.

726
00:30:42,940 --> 00:30:44,607
Met him a few times.

727
00:30:46,154 --> 00:30:46,987
God damn.

728
00:30:48,359 --> 00:30:49,955
It's exactly what he needed to hear.

729
00:30:49,955 --> 00:30:51,437
He tell you the part about where he got

730
00:30:51,437 --> 00:30:54,083
the card from Don Bennachie
at his graduation?

731
00:30:54,083 --> 00:30:55,961
And said his father would be proud.

732
00:30:55,961 --> 00:30:56,794
- Yeah.

733
00:30:58,000 --> 00:31:02,807
- Probably changed his life,
you know, hearing that.

734
00:31:02,807 --> 00:31:05,063
Now we have him here.

735
00:31:05,063 --> 00:31:07,792
God, you know, everyone
good son deserves to hear

736
00:31:07,792 --> 00:31:10,608
that their father is proud, at least once.

737
00:31:10,608 --> 00:31:14,144
He never got to hear from
his dad actually, you know?

738
00:31:14,144 --> 00:31:15,873
My father told me he was proud of me once,

739
00:31:15,873 --> 00:31:18,081
that was the greatest day of my life.

740
00:31:18,081 --> 00:31:19,845
I can remember everything about it.

741
00:31:19,845 --> 00:31:22,762
Obviously it was way before
I owned these businesses.

742
00:31:22,762 --> 00:31:25,232
I can remember what the
wallpaper looked like

743
00:31:25,232 --> 00:31:26,511
in that restaurant, I can remember what

744
00:31:26,511 --> 00:31:30,510
the coffee tasted like,
and my father, he told me,

745
00:31:30,510 --> 00:31:34,251
he was proud of me, that was
the greatest moment of my life.

746
00:31:34,251 --> 00:31:35,334
That, that...

747
00:31:39,302 --> 00:31:42,157
God dammit buddy, I'm sorry, I'm sorry.

748
00:31:42,157 --> 00:31:44,907
- It's all right, it's all right.

749
00:31:46,987 --> 00:31:49,495
- Every good son deserves
to hear at least once

750
00:31:49,495 --> 00:31:51,745
that their father is proud.

751
00:31:58,466 --> 00:31:59,970
- [Clint] When dating,
you will go out with--

752
00:31:59,970 --> 00:32:01,818
- [Angie] All sorts of characters.

753
00:32:01,818 --> 00:32:03,055
- [Both] Like:

754
00:32:03,055 --> 00:32:04,779
- [Angie] Swipe Right Guy.

755
00:32:04,779 --> 00:32:06,631
The type that throw out a big net for any

756
00:32:06,631 --> 00:32:08,655
and all women on Tinder.

757
00:32:08,655 --> 00:32:12,751
- You have really nice
hands, do you moisturize?

758
00:32:12,751 --> 00:32:15,866
I've got a really nice
basement, you should come over.

759
00:32:15,866 --> 00:32:17,758
I think you'd really like it.

760
00:32:17,758 --> 00:32:20,636
- [Clint] Non-binary girls or people or,

761
00:32:20,636 --> 00:32:23,767
I don't know, I know I'm
wrong but either way I lose.

762
00:32:23,767 --> 00:32:25,844
- That's my dog Winston.

763
00:32:25,844 --> 00:32:28,639
- Aw, looks like such a good boy.

764
00:32:28,639 --> 00:32:33,130
- Wait, did you just
assume my dog's gender?

765
00:32:33,130 --> 00:32:36,585
You're a typical agent
of the patriarch society.

766
00:32:36,585 --> 00:32:40,109
Brainwashed and programmed
to carry out misogyny.

767
00:32:40,109 --> 00:32:43,332
How dare you not allow my
child Winston to choose

768
00:32:43,332 --> 00:32:46,915
their gender, what kind
of monster are you?

769
00:32:48,876 --> 00:32:50,621
- [Angie] Cul-De-Sac Hip-Hop Guy.

770
00:32:50,621 --> 00:32:53,569
The guy who is white and
lives in a good neighborhood

771
00:32:53,569 --> 00:32:55,984
but talks like a gangster rapper.

772
00:32:55,984 --> 00:32:57,665
- Yo, shorty.

773
00:32:57,665 --> 00:33:01,109
45 is gonna be a prime year for your boy.

774
00:33:01,109 --> 00:33:02,843
My album's gonna drop,

775
00:33:02,843 --> 00:33:05,497
I'm gonna move out of my mom's basement.

776
00:33:05,497 --> 00:33:08,658
I'll be buying you Red
Lobster every Sunday.

777
00:33:08,658 --> 00:33:11,837
Cheddar Bay biscuits baby girl.

778
00:33:11,837 --> 00:33:13,793
You know I like my girls
a little bit thicker

779
00:33:13,793 --> 00:33:14,793
but ya ight.

780
00:33:15,682 --> 00:33:16,796
- [Clint] Cell Phone Girls.

781
00:33:16,796 --> 00:33:19,991
Just girls, who go on
their cellphones, a lot.

782
00:33:19,991 --> 00:33:21,574
So, what do you do?

783
00:33:22,645 --> 00:33:25,168
- I'm a Instagram influencer.

784
00:33:25,168 --> 00:33:28,293
- [Clint] Cool, cool, how
many followers do you have?

785
00:33:28,293 --> 00:33:30,174
- A couple, few thousand, I don't know.

786
00:33:30,174 --> 00:33:31,341
- That's cool.

787
00:33:32,818 --> 00:33:36,568
Do you, what are you uh, take pictures of?

788
00:33:36,568 --> 00:33:38,818
- [Cell Phone Girl] Myself.

789
00:33:41,453 --> 00:33:43,036
- Nice.
- Like this.

790
00:33:44,852 --> 00:33:45,685
Do you like it?

791
00:33:45,685 --> 00:33:48,119
- That's really good, yeah I like.

792
00:33:48,119 --> 00:33:51,939
So, what do you think
about the moon landing?

793
00:33:51,939 --> 00:33:53,873
That shit didn't happen, right?

794
00:33:53,873 --> 00:33:54,706
Yeah?

795
00:33:54,706 --> 00:33:57,569
- Oh my God, my friend
went to Disney World.

796
00:33:57,569 --> 00:34:02,407
- Yeah, (sighs) you're right,
Stanley Kubrick did direct it.

797
00:34:02,407 --> 00:34:04,043
How 'bout 9/11?

798
00:34:04,043 --> 00:34:05,168
9/11, right?

799
00:34:05,168 --> 00:34:06,103
Jews did it.

800
00:34:06,103 --> 00:34:08,337
Bush was behind it all, right, yeah?

801
00:34:08,337 --> 00:34:10,521
How did building 7 fall down?

802
00:34:10,521 --> 00:34:12,361
Wasn't hit by a plane.

803
00:34:12,361 --> 00:34:14,931
You think a plane could
melt steel beams, you know?

804
00:34:14,931 --> 00:34:16,042
Jet fuel doesn't melt steel beams--

805
00:34:16,042 --> 00:34:17,767
- Look at what you would
look like if you had a beard

806
00:34:17,767 --> 00:34:18,600
and a hat.

807
00:34:22,058 --> 00:34:25,020
- (sighs) How about
the pyramids, you know?

808
00:34:25,020 --> 00:34:26,079
There's no way that the
Egyptians could have

809
00:34:26,079 --> 00:34:29,154
built the pyramids with the
technology they had at the time.

810
00:34:29,154 --> 00:34:31,466
- [Angie] Guy Who Don't
Know They Are Gay Yet.

811
00:34:31,466 --> 00:34:33,787
- Everybody says that
I remind them of Edward

812
00:34:33,787 --> 00:34:37,585
from Twilight and I can
see that you also think

813
00:34:37,585 --> 00:34:39,573
that I'm like Edward from Twilight.

814
00:34:39,573 --> 00:34:40,656
I understand.

815
00:34:41,564 --> 00:34:43,789
I'm not Robert Pattinson.

816
00:34:43,789 --> 00:34:46,794
I wish that I was, with
his big strong arms,

817
00:34:46,794 --> 00:34:48,902
just like wrapping you up,
making you feel all warm

818
00:34:48,902 --> 00:34:50,826
and safe and cozy inside.

819
00:34:50,826 --> 00:34:54,530
So, like, my name's Tyler
but my friend Tyler,

820
00:34:54,530 --> 00:34:59,088
you may have met him,
he's like kinda handsome,

821
00:34:59,088 --> 00:35:03,613
you know, strapping, like,
broad shoulders, you know.

822
00:35:03,613 --> 00:35:05,951
Really, really handsome.

823
00:35:05,951 --> 00:35:08,516
I don't think you understand
it, he is very handsome.

824
00:35:08,516 --> 00:35:09,430
No?

825
00:35:09,430 --> 00:35:13,674
Okay, that's fine, anyway,
so he turned me on to

826
00:35:13,674 --> 00:35:16,390
this idea called pegging?

827
00:35:16,390 --> 00:35:18,126
Do you know what that is?

828
00:35:18,126 --> 00:35:21,610
It's where, like a guy,
so get this, this is wild

829
00:35:21,610 --> 00:35:26,428
and you know, I'm not like
super into this sort of thing

830
00:35:26,428 --> 00:35:29,947
but I'll try anything
once, I always say that,

831
00:35:29,947 --> 00:35:31,994
I think that's the
motto of the Boy Scouts.

832
00:35:31,994 --> 00:35:32,969
And that's where I learned it.

833
00:35:32,969 --> 00:35:35,659
- [Clint] Narcissistic Mean Women.

834
00:35:35,659 --> 00:35:38,893
Brock has another word
for them, it's shorter

835
00:35:38,893 --> 00:35:39,858
and to the point.

836
00:35:39,858 --> 00:35:40,691
- Cunts.

837
00:35:42,190 --> 00:35:43,912
- I never come to Waterloo, I always go to

838
00:35:43,912 --> 00:35:47,199
the Ceder Falls Brown Bottle
and if you're lucky enough

839
00:35:47,199 --> 00:35:49,613
to get a second date with
me, we can only come here

840
00:35:49,613 --> 00:35:51,613
when it's light outside.

841
00:35:52,973 --> 00:35:54,843
I haven't been around
this many minorities since

842
00:35:54,843 --> 00:35:55,843
my last DUI.

843
00:35:57,467 --> 00:36:00,376
I think I went to high
school with that loser.

844
00:36:00,376 --> 00:36:03,793
Quit staring at me you soy boy beta cuck.

845
00:36:04,724 --> 00:36:07,307
(mellow music)

846
00:36:10,160 --> 00:36:12,010
- [Clint] There are only a few
places to go on a first date

847
00:36:12,010 --> 00:36:13,911
in the Ceder Valley.

848
00:36:13,911 --> 00:36:16,137
The Brown Bottle.

849
00:36:16,137 --> 00:36:17,366
The Waterloo one,

850
00:36:17,366 --> 00:36:21,449
the Ceder Falls one is
flooded this time of year.

851
00:36:22,877 --> 00:36:24,599
- I'm just gonna get a little comfier,

852
00:36:24,599 --> 00:36:26,516
are you okay with that?

853
00:36:27,561 --> 00:36:29,061
Are you into feet?

854
00:36:35,404 --> 00:36:37,325
I think you should smell this.

855
00:36:37,325 --> 00:36:39,908
I sprayed it with some Febreze.

856
00:36:41,037 --> 00:36:42,537
Mm, you like that?

857
00:36:45,004 --> 00:36:46,780
Warms me up.

858
00:36:46,780 --> 00:36:48,961
How's your breath?

859
00:36:48,961 --> 00:36:52,628
When I like to get eaten
out, I like a mint.

860
00:36:54,572 --> 00:36:55,405
Thank you.

861
00:37:01,278 --> 00:37:05,248
You know, I'm into some pretty fun things.

862
00:37:05,248 --> 00:37:06,498
Like, now then,

863
00:37:07,851 --> 00:37:08,768
bus driver,

864
00:37:09,646 --> 00:37:11,146
Mississippi diver.

865
00:37:12,712 --> 00:37:13,815
You not heard of those?

866
00:37:13,815 --> 00:37:17,648
One of my favorites is
the Milwaukee blizzard.

867
00:37:19,023 --> 00:37:22,363
Oh, sweetie, you don't need to freak out,

868
00:37:22,363 --> 00:37:24,956
momma will take good care of you.

869
00:37:24,956 --> 00:37:25,789
- Hi there.

870
00:37:25,789 --> 00:37:26,622
- Hi.

871
00:37:26,622 --> 00:37:28,394
- Thanks for joining me.

872
00:37:28,394 --> 00:37:30,325
So, tell me a little bit about yourself.

873
00:37:30,325 --> 00:37:33,075
(elevator music)

874
00:37:37,002 --> 00:37:39,933
- Well, I'm just working right now.

875
00:37:39,933 --> 00:37:41,005
- Okay, where at?

876
00:37:41,005 --> 00:37:41,875
- [Angie] I'm a waitress.

877
00:37:41,875 --> 00:37:43,262
- Oh, cool, awesome.

878
00:37:43,262 --> 00:37:45,004
Low self-esteem and stuff
then, that's awesome.

879
00:37:45,004 --> 00:37:47,017
Where do you work, where
do you waitress at?

880
00:37:47,017 --> 00:37:47,850
- [Angie] Um--

881
00:37:47,850 --> 00:37:49,646
- That's cool, that's awesome.

882
00:37:49,646 --> 00:37:51,766
What's the hardest part about it?

883
00:37:51,766 --> 00:37:54,151
- [Angie] Well, I mean, you're
walking, running around--

884
00:37:54,151 --> 00:37:58,046
- Oh, yeah, definitely, I can see that.

885
00:37:58,046 --> 00:37:58,879
I can see that.

886
00:37:58,879 --> 00:37:59,712
Do you want something to drink?

887
00:37:59,712 --> 00:38:00,597
Can you drink?

888
00:38:00,597 --> 00:38:01,879
- Um--
- Fruit smoothie?

889
00:38:01,879 --> 00:38:03,012
Shirley Temp?

890
00:38:03,012 --> 00:38:04,346
I like a Shirley Temp from time to time,

891
00:38:04,346 --> 00:38:05,332
I do a Dirty Shirley.

892
00:38:05,332 --> 00:38:07,012
I can get you a drink here
probably, if you want.

893
00:38:07,012 --> 00:38:07,977
Be gnarly.

894
00:38:07,977 --> 00:38:09,970
- Um, I'm fine, I'll just--

895
00:38:09,970 --> 00:38:11,356
- If you like, it can be
a B&J wine cooler, maybe?

896
00:38:11,356 --> 00:38:12,189
Something?

897
00:38:12,189 --> 00:38:13,403
Have you ever had vatorade?

898
00:38:13,403 --> 00:38:14,674
Vodka Gatorade?

899
00:38:14,674 --> 00:38:15,507
Sipping that, you know,

900
00:38:15,507 --> 00:38:17,251
in geometry class or something (chuckles).

901
00:38:17,251 --> 00:38:18,084
Maybe?

902
00:38:18,084 --> 00:38:18,917
No?

903
00:38:18,917 --> 00:38:19,750
- I'm not sure.

904
00:38:19,750 --> 00:38:21,309
- What do they drink on Laguna Beach?

905
00:38:21,309 --> 00:38:23,452
Or what are you kids watching these days?

906
00:38:23,452 --> 00:38:24,409
Real World.

907
00:38:24,409 --> 00:38:26,981
- Okay so I have a
question, serious question.

908
00:38:26,981 --> 00:38:30,501
I've never had sex with
an uncircumcised male.

909
00:38:30,501 --> 00:38:32,494
Are you circumcised or not?

910
00:38:32,494 --> 00:38:33,541
I'd really like to feel it.

911
00:38:33,541 --> 00:38:35,893
I have a friend, she says her husband

912
00:38:35,893 --> 00:38:40,146
is not circumcised, she said
because of that extra skin,

913
00:38:40,146 --> 00:38:43,979
it gives it that extra
mmph of a sexy feeling.

914
00:38:45,301 --> 00:38:47,328
So, what do you have?

915
00:38:47,328 --> 00:38:48,161
Oh, also,

916
00:38:49,304 --> 00:38:50,137
size-wise?

917
00:38:51,437 --> 00:38:53,716
I can't go too big because, you know,

918
00:38:53,716 --> 00:38:56,878
I like the thickness of a dick.

919
00:38:56,878 --> 00:39:00,204
How's your ball smacking ability?

920
00:39:00,204 --> 00:39:02,388
Do you like to turn it around?

921
00:39:02,388 --> 00:39:04,068
Or, I can be on top the whole time.

922
00:39:04,068 --> 00:39:07,994
That is absolutely not a problem,
I do a lot of ab workouts.

923
00:39:07,994 --> 00:39:09,634
Lots of workouts.

924
00:39:09,634 --> 00:39:11,986
I'll take care of you.

925
00:39:11,986 --> 00:39:15,029
- So, I'm thinking about maybe going back

926
00:39:15,029 --> 00:39:17,225
to my place tonight and
painting or something?

927
00:39:17,225 --> 00:39:18,058
From the looks of things,

928
00:39:18,058 --> 00:39:18,970
I don't know what your hobbies are,

929
00:39:18,970 --> 00:39:22,265
it just looks like maybe, painting?

930
00:39:22,265 --> 00:39:23,098
Singing?

931
00:39:23,098 --> 00:39:23,931
Dancing?

932
00:39:23,931 --> 00:39:24,764
Artsy something.
- Art, yeah.

933
00:39:24,764 --> 00:39:29,363
- Yeah, totally, yeah, I
feel that, I feel that.

934
00:39:29,363 --> 00:39:30,196
- Okay.

935
00:39:30,196 --> 00:39:33,216
- So, maybe we just grab
some wine after this?

936
00:39:33,216 --> 00:39:34,582
What do you think?

937
00:39:34,582 --> 00:39:36,450
- I don't care, I'm probably just gonna...

938
00:39:36,450 --> 00:39:37,909
Go.

939
00:39:37,909 --> 00:39:38,886
- Yeah, go?

940
00:39:38,886 --> 00:39:39,719
Let's go then.

941
00:39:39,719 --> 00:39:40,563
We'll just get out of here.
- Not right now.

942
00:39:40,563 --> 00:39:41,476
- You can come back to my place.

943
00:39:41,476 --> 00:39:42,309
No, not right now?

944
00:39:42,309 --> 00:39:44,343
We'll wait, we'll get food first.

945
00:39:44,343 --> 00:39:46,873
Good food here, you know, you
can order whatever you want.

946
00:39:46,873 --> 00:39:48,963
Just try to keep it under, like, 45.

947
00:39:48,963 --> 00:39:50,464
If you can.

948
00:39:50,464 --> 00:39:53,667
(chuckles) or if you can't, either way.

949
00:39:53,667 --> 00:39:57,141
Yeah, I made an app, have you
been on, have you seen it?

950
00:39:57,141 --> 00:39:58,865
It's a Bible study app.

951
00:39:58,865 --> 00:40:03,116
You can meet up, get
on your knees and pray,

952
00:40:03,116 --> 00:40:05,090
you know what I mean?

953
00:40:05,090 --> 00:40:06,653
Just the good Lord's name,

954
00:40:06,653 --> 00:40:10,464
coming right out of your
mouth, just oh God, oh God,

955
00:40:10,464 --> 00:40:14,593
oh Lord, yes Lord, hard
Lord, you know what I mean?

956
00:40:14,593 --> 00:40:16,828
- You're not allergic to cats are you?

957
00:40:16,828 --> 00:40:18,911
I kinda have a cat thing.

958
00:40:19,854 --> 00:40:21,419
That is a fetish.

959
00:40:21,419 --> 00:40:24,326
Have you not heard of the meowing fetish?

960
00:40:24,326 --> 00:40:25,159
Meow.

961
00:40:27,586 --> 00:40:30,253
I like having people pet me, mm.

962
00:40:33,035 --> 00:40:34,892
- Hi there, yes, ill have the cesar salad

963
00:40:34,892 --> 00:40:37,182
and I think the lady will
have the meatball sub,

964
00:40:37,182 --> 00:40:40,264
don't cut it, big, two,
full double-hander,

965
00:40:40,264 --> 00:40:42,218
big hefty balls please with that.

966
00:40:42,218 --> 00:40:44,873
And finish it off, banana split,

967
00:40:44,873 --> 00:40:46,628
don't actually split the banana

968
00:40:46,628 --> 00:40:50,134
and again, I want a
hearty, healthy banana.

969
00:40:50,134 --> 00:40:52,738
I'll be back and I'll check
the kitchen if you're not.

970
00:40:52,738 --> 00:40:55,274
If there's any way to,
you guys make a corn dog?

971
00:40:55,274 --> 00:40:57,524
No, no corn dogs available.

972
00:40:58,777 --> 00:40:59,785
Let's see.

973
00:40:59,785 --> 00:41:03,651
I need a drink, definitely
a drink, long drink, straw.

974
00:41:03,651 --> 00:41:05,782
Big straw (slurps).

975
00:41:05,782 --> 00:41:07,622
You know what I'm talking about?

976
00:41:07,622 --> 00:41:09,951
Anything else, are you?

977
00:41:09,951 --> 00:41:12,452
Not the shrimp cocktail,
no, don't bring that up.

978
00:41:12,452 --> 00:41:15,073
- I'm also into a lot of bondage.

979
00:41:15,073 --> 00:41:18,027
I can be submissive, or dominant.

980
00:41:18,027 --> 00:41:20,421
Whatever works for you,
I mean if you like to go

981
00:41:20,421 --> 00:41:22,983
both ways, I can just smack you real quick

982
00:41:22,983 --> 00:41:24,282
and you're fine.

983
00:41:24,282 --> 00:41:25,514
You can do it back to me!

984
00:41:25,514 --> 00:41:26,887
I like it.

985
00:41:26,887 --> 00:41:28,569
Oh, thank you.

986
00:41:28,569 --> 00:41:30,130
(exhales)

987
00:41:30,130 --> 00:41:32,891
- Have you been with a man before?

988
00:41:32,891 --> 00:41:33,846
- What do you mean?

989
00:41:33,846 --> 00:41:35,590
- Like been with a man,
in the Biblical sense,

990
00:41:35,590 --> 00:41:37,606
you know what I mean.

991
00:41:37,606 --> 00:41:38,689
- [Angie] No.

992
00:41:39,841 --> 00:41:42,613
- Have you, um, taken his offering?

993
00:41:42,613 --> 00:41:45,796
Has anyone broken the sound barrier?

994
00:41:45,796 --> 00:41:46,751
If you know what I mean.

995
00:41:46,751 --> 00:41:48,242
That hymen.

996
00:41:48,242 --> 00:41:49,075
No?

997
00:41:49,075 --> 00:41:49,908
That's cool.

998
00:41:49,908 --> 00:41:52,957
- So, I'm just gonna pay for these drinks.

999
00:41:52,957 --> 00:41:56,201
I'll give you some time
to get your shit together

1000
00:41:56,201 --> 00:41:58,658
'cause you seem a little emotional

1001
00:41:58,658 --> 00:42:01,512
and you can come and
meet me in the restroom

1002
00:42:01,512 --> 00:42:02,945
in about 10 minutes and then you can come

1003
00:42:02,945 --> 00:42:04,112
and give me some good dick.

1004
00:42:04,112 --> 00:42:04,945
Sound good?

1005
00:42:04,945 --> 00:42:06,800
Perfect, thank you.

1006
00:42:06,800 --> 00:42:08,480
- Before dinner and everything gets here,

1007
00:42:08,480 --> 00:42:10,556
I'll make a little space
and I might you know,

1008
00:42:10,556 --> 00:42:12,501
clear the pipes a little
bit, for later tonight,

1009
00:42:12,501 --> 00:42:13,719
you know what I mean.

1010
00:42:13,719 --> 00:42:17,791
And probably gonna see if
they have any condoms for sale

1011
00:42:17,791 --> 00:42:18,916
in the bathroom.

1012
00:42:18,916 --> 00:42:20,260
I'm a gentleman, I'll buy one.

1013
00:42:20,260 --> 00:42:21,982
Probably won't wear it
but I will purchase it,

1014
00:42:21,982 --> 00:42:24,513
just so that you know that
the respect level is there.

1015
00:42:24,513 --> 00:42:28,018
Order a drink, order some
food, maybe, whatever you want.

1016
00:42:28,018 --> 00:42:30,320
Heard they've got good
muscles so order that up,

1017
00:42:30,320 --> 00:42:31,684
if you like a (slurping).

1018
00:42:31,684 --> 00:42:32,722
Slurp something down.

1019
00:42:32,722 --> 00:42:36,124
So, I will be right back, madam.

1020
00:42:36,124 --> 00:42:38,744
♪ Gettin' my dick sucked ♪

1021
00:42:38,744 --> 00:42:43,050
- [Clint] Okay, I am now
officially freaked out.

1022
00:42:43,050 --> 00:42:47,389
- [Angie] Okay, I am now
officially freaked out.

1023
00:42:47,389 --> 00:42:50,639
(Spanish guitar music)

1024
00:42:53,857 --> 00:42:56,722
- And so yeah, that was like
the fifth yeast infection

1025
00:42:56,722 --> 00:42:58,601
in like, as many months.

1026
00:42:58,601 --> 00:43:00,703
- Well, I don't know what
kind of water you're drinking,

1027
00:43:00,703 --> 00:43:01,899
you've got a Brita filter in your house,

1028
00:43:01,899 --> 00:43:03,694
or what's going on, maybe
change the laundry detergent.

1029
00:43:03,694 --> 00:43:04,985
I don't know enough about yeast.

1030
00:43:04,985 --> 00:43:05,953
Stop eating fucking bread!

1031
00:43:05,953 --> 00:43:07,127
Maybe, that might be the move.

1032
00:43:07,127 --> 00:43:08,325
- I've just been drinking out of

1033
00:43:08,325 --> 00:43:09,678
the back section of the toilet.

1034
00:43:09,678 --> 00:43:11,010
- Oh, you were getting
the yeast infections.

1035
00:43:11,010 --> 00:43:12,682
- Yes, I was getting them.
- Sorry, I was half listening.

1036
00:43:12,682 --> 00:43:14,717
- And then I was then
giving them to other people.

1037
00:43:14,717 --> 00:43:18,489
It was, I mean it was
probably my second best summer

1038
00:43:18,489 --> 00:43:20,012
that I've ever had.
- That's cool man.

1039
00:43:20,012 --> 00:43:21,385
Yeah, you're like the Gingerbread Man

1040
00:43:21,385 --> 00:43:22,795
but with giving out yeast kind of a thing.

1041
00:43:22,795 --> 00:43:23,854
- Yeah, I mean that's--
- That's dope.

1042
00:43:23,854 --> 00:43:26,018
- That's actually what I
use as my internet handle.

1043
00:43:26,018 --> 00:43:26,851
- Can I catch that?

1044
00:43:26,851 --> 00:43:27,684
We've shared, like, drinks and stuff.

1045
00:43:27,684 --> 00:43:28,828
Can I catch that, that way?

1046
00:43:28,828 --> 00:43:30,633
- I think alcohol is the great
purifier so we're all good.

1047
00:43:30,633 --> 00:43:31,524
- Oh, it kills it.

1048
00:43:31,524 --> 00:43:33,279
Good, good, good, good, man.

1049
00:43:33,279 --> 00:43:35,682
- Hey man, so, how'd that go?

1050
00:43:35,682 --> 00:43:36,515
By the way.

1051
00:43:36,515 --> 00:43:39,882
- I mean, she's a virgin, or
is, not for long, hopefully

1052
00:43:39,882 --> 00:43:42,233
but we'll see, she'll pick up on it later.

1053
00:43:42,233 --> 00:43:44,311
She'll probably get some
bad dick from someone else

1054
00:43:44,311 --> 00:43:45,753
and then she'll call me up

1055
00:43:45,753 --> 00:43:46,938
and she can get some bad dick from me.

1056
00:43:46,938 --> 00:43:51,244
- And then afterwards, then
I will hit her up on LinkedIn

1057
00:43:51,244 --> 00:43:53,961
and I will say, hey girl,
I heard you had one Tyler,

1058
00:43:53,961 --> 00:43:55,590
would you like another one?

1059
00:43:55,590 --> 00:43:58,121
- You almost might wanna try our app.

1060
00:43:58,121 --> 00:43:59,454
- Well see, that's the thing,

1061
00:43:59,454 --> 00:44:03,161
I am so happy with how things
have been going with this app.

1062
00:44:03,161 --> 00:44:04,611
- Who knew.
- Yeah.

1063
00:44:04,611 --> 00:44:06,467
Who knew Christians were super horny, man.

1064
00:44:06,467 --> 00:44:08,316
- You start a Bible
app, hey, let's meet up,

1065
00:44:08,316 --> 00:44:10,615
let's study Bible, all they
wanna do, finger each other.

1066
00:44:10,615 --> 00:44:11,897
Big time.
- Yeah man.

1067
00:44:11,897 --> 00:44:14,980
("Just Like Heaven")

1068
00:44:18,365 --> 00:44:20,308
- So, guess who I saw yesterday?

1069
00:44:20,308 --> 00:44:21,641
- Joe Biden.

1070
00:44:21,641 --> 00:44:24,833
- You're close, Tyler the Tool.

1071
00:44:24,833 --> 00:44:27,311
- (chuckles) I am close.

1072
00:44:27,311 --> 00:44:28,812
- Where'd you see Tyler the Tool?

1073
00:44:28,812 --> 00:44:30,335
- He was at the grocery store

1074
00:44:30,335 --> 00:44:33,149
and he tried hitting on
me by the produce section.

1075
00:44:33,149 --> 00:44:34,966
- He hangs out by the produce?

1076
00:44:34,966 --> 00:44:37,632
- Yeah, man, think of all the
phallic shaped vegetables.

1077
00:44:37,632 --> 00:44:38,704
(laughing)

1078
00:44:38,704 --> 00:44:41,496
- You know he took a hooker to prom.

1079
00:44:41,496 --> 00:44:42,880
- Took a hooker to prom.

1080
00:44:42,880 --> 00:44:45,507
- Yeah, he took a hooker to prom.

1081
00:44:45,507 --> 00:44:48,280
- He took a hooker to prom.

1082
00:44:48,280 --> 00:44:51,363
("Just Like Heaven")

1083
00:44:53,152 --> 00:44:56,512
- You went on a date with Tyler the Tool?

1084
00:44:56,512 --> 00:44:57,876
- Yeah.

1085
00:44:57,876 --> 00:45:00,628
- You know he took a
hooker to prom, right?

1086
00:45:00,628 --> 00:45:02,591
- What, how does that work?

1087
00:45:02,591 --> 00:45:06,497
- Oh, well, you find one, you pay them

1088
00:45:06,497 --> 00:45:08,482
and then you go to prom.

1089
00:45:08,482 --> 00:45:10,046
- Did people know it?

1090
00:45:10,046 --> 00:45:13,029
- Imagine going to prom
and your science teacher

1091
00:45:13,029 --> 00:45:15,465
slips your date a hundred.

1092
00:45:15,465 --> 00:45:17,563
- Okay, where do we even find a hooker?

1093
00:45:17,563 --> 00:45:20,578
- Well, it's not like the
movies, not Pretty Woman,

1094
00:45:20,578 --> 00:45:22,227
no Richard Gere.

1095
00:45:22,227 --> 00:45:23,060
- Gerbil.

1096
00:45:25,324 --> 00:45:27,970
- Okay, how do you start
a career in prostitution?

1097
00:45:27,970 --> 00:45:30,720
- Well, it starts when you
answer an online advertisement

1098
00:45:30,720 --> 00:45:33,441
for a potential modeling gig.

1099
00:45:33,441 --> 00:45:35,928
- If things don't pick
up for you waitressing,

1100
00:45:35,928 --> 00:45:39,131
maybe you should think about
a career in prostitution.

1101
00:45:39,131 --> 00:45:42,155
- You know, I'd manage
you, I'd be your pimp.

1102
00:45:42,155 --> 00:45:43,734
I'd sell you to those rich oil Sheikhs.

1103
00:45:43,734 --> 00:45:45,130
- Mmhmm.

1104
00:45:45,130 --> 00:45:47,483
- I would totally trust you as my pimp.

1105
00:45:47,483 --> 00:45:50,567
- End of the day, it's
the same for any woman.

1106
00:45:50,567 --> 00:45:54,914
Your feet hurt and you
are unraveling dirty cash

1107
00:45:54,914 --> 00:45:59,211
that has been given to
you by guilty Lutherans.

1108
00:45:59,211 --> 00:46:00,826
- Now go make that scratch, bitch.

1109
00:46:00,826 --> 00:46:03,409
(all laughing)

1110
00:46:05,488 --> 00:46:08,655
- You went on a date with Kinky Karla?

1111
00:46:10,917 --> 00:46:14,151
- I've never been through
something so traumatic.

1112
00:46:14,151 --> 00:46:16,019
And my parents are dead.

1113
00:46:16,019 --> 00:46:17,363
(Brock laughs)

1114
00:46:17,363 --> 00:46:19,474
- You know, she used to work for me.

1115
00:46:19,474 --> 00:46:20,734
- Oh, yeah.

1116
00:46:20,734 --> 00:46:21,616
Oh my God.

1117
00:46:21,616 --> 00:46:24,556
- She was good, she was very good.

1118
00:46:24,556 --> 00:46:27,317
We sold a lot of anal beads
when she was employed.

1119
00:46:27,317 --> 00:46:28,924
- My God, I remember that summer, man.

1120
00:46:28,924 --> 00:46:32,368
Seriously, I used to
always refer to the vagina

1121
00:46:32,368 --> 00:46:33,743
as the wage gap,

1122
00:46:33,743 --> 00:46:36,255
until I saw what receipt
she was pulling on,

1123
00:46:36,255 --> 00:46:37,901
look at all the commission she made,

1124
00:46:37,901 --> 00:46:39,687
it was more money than I could fathom.

1125
00:46:39,687 --> 00:46:42,395
- It's a huge markup on anal beads.

1126
00:46:42,395 --> 00:46:44,937
And it's an item you don't really re-use.

1127
00:46:44,937 --> 00:46:46,461
You usually buy them new again.

1128
00:46:46,461 --> 00:46:48,163
- Well, yeah, especially
the way I'm using them.

1129
00:46:48,163 --> 00:46:50,443
Most people try to pull them
out all slow and seductive.

1130
00:46:50,443 --> 00:46:52,061
Not me, man, get it over with.

1131
00:46:52,061 --> 00:46:54,000
Just one quick pull, like a band-aid.

1132
00:46:54,000 --> 00:46:56,806
Or starting a lawnmower on
the first day of spring.

1133
00:46:56,806 --> 00:46:58,938
Just a final crank back.

1134
00:46:58,938 --> 00:47:01,140
- You know, you void your
warrantee when you do that.

1135
00:47:01,140 --> 00:47:03,085
- Oh, fuck the warranty,
they're made in China.

1136
00:47:03,085 --> 00:47:04,585
- Yeah, why are they made in China?

1137
00:47:04,585 --> 00:47:05,933
Why can't we make those here?

1138
00:47:05,933 --> 00:47:08,148
I mean it's a simple plastic product.

1139
00:47:08,148 --> 00:47:11,477
- After NAFTA, everything
went over there and Mexico.

1140
00:47:11,477 --> 00:47:12,989
- I know, it's horrible
because it's kind of

1141
00:47:12,989 --> 00:47:16,106
a cheap product, why
aren't we making that here?

1142
00:47:16,106 --> 00:47:17,483
I mean there's gotta be

1143
00:47:17,483 --> 00:47:19,698
manufacturing space over in Cedar Falls

1144
00:47:19,698 --> 00:47:22,344
at the Cedar Falls Park, Technology Park.

1145
00:47:22,344 --> 00:47:24,413
You can get a place over
there making anal beads.

1146
00:47:24,413 --> 00:47:25,943
Why can't we manufacture those here?

1147
00:47:25,943 --> 00:47:27,257
- The problem is, is that they hold

1148
00:47:27,257 --> 00:47:29,548
the quality standards too high over here.

1149
00:47:29,548 --> 00:47:32,592
Over there, you can have air
bubbles in those things, man.

1150
00:47:32,592 --> 00:47:35,070
They can come out like a pair
of pliers from Harbor Freight.

1151
00:47:35,070 --> 00:47:36,414
You push on them, they'll crank down

1152
00:47:36,414 --> 00:47:37,695
and break on the first try.

1153
00:47:37,695 --> 00:47:39,890
- I would be happy to
pay a higher wholesale

1154
00:47:39,890 --> 00:47:42,999
on anal beads if they
were made in America.

1155
00:47:42,999 --> 00:47:43,832
I'd be happy to.

1156
00:47:43,832 --> 00:47:44,665
- That's the problem,

1157
00:47:44,665 --> 00:47:48,000
nobody wants to make like an
old Chevy, back in the '50s.

1158
00:47:48,000 --> 00:47:50,751
- I know, we just lost our
quality standards and you know,

1159
00:47:50,751 --> 00:47:53,291
we're so willing to pay for a
cheap product that's inferior,

1160
00:47:53,291 --> 00:47:56,841
made in China when it could be made here.

1161
00:47:56,841 --> 00:47:59,539
- I thought I was gonna
fall in love tonight.

1162
00:47:59,539 --> 00:48:01,734
Now I'm sitting here
drinking with a smut peddler

1163
00:48:01,734 --> 00:48:02,567
and a homo.

1164
00:48:02,567 --> 00:48:05,619
- Hey, that's a deviant homo.

1165
00:48:05,619 --> 00:48:07,619
- He's right about that.

1166
00:48:09,032 --> 00:48:12,759
♪ Show me, show me, show
me how you do that trick ♪

1167
00:48:12,759 --> 00:48:15,900
♪ The one that makes me scream, she said ♪

1168
00:48:15,900 --> 00:48:19,143
♪ The one that makes me laugh, she said ♪

1169
00:48:19,143 --> 00:48:22,596
♪ She threw her arms around my neck ♪

1170
00:48:22,596 --> 00:48:27,030
♪ Show me how you do it
and I'll promise you ♪

1171
00:48:27,030 --> 00:48:31,639
♪ I promise that I'll run away with you ♪

1172
00:48:31,639 --> 00:48:35,467
♪ I'll run away with you ♪

1173
00:48:35,467 --> 00:48:38,550
("Just Like Heaven")

1174
00:48:41,328 --> 00:48:43,776
(cheering)

1175
00:48:43,776 --> 00:48:45,676
- Hello, my name is The Colonel

1176
00:48:45,676 --> 00:48:49,026
and welcome to The Colonel's
Open Talent Showcase.

1177
00:48:49,026 --> 00:48:50,193
- [Crowd] Woo!

1178
00:48:52,000 --> 00:48:53,741
- Thank you, thank you for that.

1179
00:48:53,741 --> 00:48:56,135
We have a mighty fine
show for you tonight.

1180
00:48:56,135 --> 00:48:59,552
We have several musical acts, a comedian,

1181
00:49:01,794 --> 00:49:04,020
I do believe we have a poet.

1182
00:49:04,020 --> 00:49:06,520
I would like to get a magician

1183
00:49:07,475 --> 00:49:10,564
or maybe a juggler of some sort.

1184
00:49:10,564 --> 00:49:14,153
No mimes, mind you, can not stand mimes.

1185
00:49:14,153 --> 00:49:18,228
I do declare, we shall have
a fantastic show tonight.

1186
00:49:18,228 --> 00:49:22,061
So, welcome to The
Colonel's Open Talent Show.

1187
00:49:23,688 --> 00:49:24,855
- [Crowd] Woo!

1188
00:49:26,692 --> 00:49:29,344
- You don't seem like the type
to come to a open mic night.

1189
00:49:29,344 --> 00:49:30,724
- Oh no, no, no, no.

1190
00:49:30,724 --> 00:49:33,317
I'm here actually waiting on a date.

1191
00:49:33,317 --> 00:49:34,400
- Oh, a date.

1192
00:49:35,330 --> 00:49:38,357
- (chuckles) Yeah, independent
filmmaker, you know,

1193
00:49:38,357 --> 00:49:40,384
maybe have to put the
old dick duster to work,

1194
00:49:40,384 --> 00:49:41,350
you know what I mean?

1195
00:49:41,350 --> 00:49:42,725
- Oh, I know what you mean.

1196
00:49:42,725 --> 00:49:47,499
- Yeah, those art types,
they're all, you know (gurgles).

1197
00:49:47,499 --> 00:49:51,195
♪ We'll start a fire or shed a tear ♪

1198
00:49:51,195 --> 00:49:55,166
♪ The jukebox is on ♪

1199
00:49:55,166 --> 00:49:58,315
♪ It made me smile ♪

1200
00:49:58,315 --> 00:50:00,466
♪ A song about you ♪

1201
00:50:00,466 --> 00:50:04,257
♪ And me, I ain't heard in a while ♪

1202
00:50:04,257 --> 00:50:09,257
♪ It's been a long day
but I am strong today ♪

1203
00:50:10,664 --> 00:50:12,184
♪ The lesson is learned ♪

1204
00:50:12,184 --> 00:50:17,184
♪ Yeah, I got burned and
I put out the flame ♪

1205
00:50:18,116 --> 00:50:21,278
(mellow music)

1206
00:50:21,278 --> 00:50:23,084
- My name's Rebecca.

1207
00:50:23,084 --> 00:50:24,825
Don't call me Becky.

1208
00:50:24,825 --> 00:50:27,575
(elevator music)

1209
00:50:30,087 --> 00:50:32,050
Makes me sound like
some kind of WASP bitch

1210
00:50:32,050 --> 00:50:35,612
that was late for a tennis tournament.

1211
00:50:35,612 --> 00:50:37,279
So, you went to UNI?

1212
00:50:38,426 --> 00:50:39,894
- Yeah, yeah, I did.

1213
00:50:39,894 --> 00:50:42,416
- And what was your grade point average?

1214
00:50:42,416 --> 00:50:44,138
- Mostly B's.

1215
00:50:44,138 --> 00:50:45,921
- See, if you went to Wartburg,

1216
00:50:45,921 --> 00:50:48,242
you'd probably get mostly C's and D's

1217
00:50:48,242 --> 00:50:49,688
if you were getting B's at

1218
00:50:49,688 --> 00:50:52,063
the University of Northern Iowa.

1219
00:50:52,063 --> 00:50:53,996
So, do you go to church?

1220
00:50:53,996 --> 00:50:57,032
- Yeah, I go to First United
Methodist in Cedar Falls.

1221
00:50:57,032 --> 00:51:00,159
- Oh, that's cute and quaint.

1222
00:51:00,159 --> 00:51:01,742
I'm a Lutheran, so.

1223
00:51:04,779 --> 00:51:06,112
It's, it's okay.

1224
00:51:07,237 --> 00:51:09,737
(chill music)

1225
00:51:14,974 --> 00:51:17,724
(elevator music)

1226
00:51:20,130 --> 00:51:22,130
(burps)

1227
00:51:23,428 --> 00:51:24,261
- Oh, hey.

1228
00:51:27,069 --> 00:51:27,902
Yeah.

1229
00:51:29,580 --> 00:51:30,413
Books.

1230
00:51:33,903 --> 00:51:34,736
Power.

1231
00:51:36,676 --> 00:51:38,694
Got a hawk on it.

1232
00:51:38,694 --> 00:51:40,277
That's pretty dope.

1233
00:51:41,141 --> 00:51:42,141
My favorite.

1234
00:51:43,000 --> 00:51:45,000
Put that down for later.

1235
00:51:46,318 --> 00:51:48,082
- So, where do you work?

1236
00:51:48,082 --> 00:51:50,233
- I work at sales.

1237
00:51:50,233 --> 00:51:53,248
- Oh, well, I see you're not
wearing a tie with your blazer

1238
00:51:53,248 --> 00:51:56,270
so I'm gonna say you're more
of a renter rather than owner.

1239
00:51:56,270 --> 00:52:01,103
Usually, personally, I go for
owners but we're here so um.

1240
00:52:02,404 --> 00:52:04,726
So, what do your parents do?

1241
00:52:04,726 --> 00:52:07,736
- My parents, they died
when I was really young.

1242
00:52:07,736 --> 00:52:12,202
- Oh, so you're like
lower middle class then.

1243
00:52:12,202 --> 00:52:14,869
And no trust fund, I'm assuming.

1244
00:52:16,463 --> 00:52:19,695
That's okay, mine have
got me pretty well set-up.

1245
00:52:19,695 --> 00:52:24,600
So, my dad's in accounting so
that's Wartburg, obviously.

1246
00:52:24,600 --> 00:52:26,100
But you look nice.

1247
00:52:30,270 --> 00:52:31,770
- Oh, right, food!

1248
00:52:33,305 --> 00:52:37,536
Oh okay, I gotta have one of
your famous meatball subs,

1249
00:52:37,536 --> 00:52:41,518
I'm talking like, the 12
inch with the meatballs

1250
00:52:41,518 --> 00:52:46,518
and the sauce, I gotta have me
some shredded chee' in there.

1251
00:52:46,619 --> 00:52:50,558
And then you gotta have me some jalapeños

1252
00:52:50,558 --> 00:52:53,558
and uh, what's on your meatball sub?

1253
00:52:59,409 --> 00:53:00,326
Cheesecake.

1254
00:53:02,803 --> 00:53:03,720
Cheesecake.

1255
00:53:05,455 --> 00:53:06,288
Guy.

1256
00:53:07,331 --> 00:53:08,248
Cheesecake.

1257
00:53:10,639 --> 00:53:13,622
- Well, this has been an
interesting experience,

1258
00:53:13,622 --> 00:53:17,612
to say the least but I'm a
little more New York Times,

1259
00:53:17,612 --> 00:53:20,612
where you're Oelwein Daily Register.

1260
00:53:22,598 --> 00:53:25,988
- The Don's from Oelwein, so I'll take it.

1261
00:53:25,988 --> 00:53:30,988
Well, they're not mething
around with Oelwein, are they?

1262
00:53:31,438 --> 00:53:36,438
- Oh my God, you went on a
date with Becky Harrington?

1263
00:53:36,499 --> 00:53:39,200
- She prefers Rebecca now.

1264
00:53:39,200 --> 00:53:40,250
- Why wouldn't she?

1265
00:53:40,250 --> 00:53:41,132
- Rebecca?

1266
00:53:41,132 --> 00:53:44,073
What is she a Jewish girl
from Schaumburg, Illinois

1267
00:53:44,073 --> 00:53:46,733
trying to get into North Western?

1268
00:53:46,733 --> 00:53:49,650
- Well, what happened on that date?

1269
00:53:51,311 --> 00:53:53,228
- She was just so mean.

1270
00:53:54,517 --> 00:53:55,517
Like, had no

1271
00:53:57,005 --> 00:53:57,990
soul,

1272
00:53:57,990 --> 00:53:59,806
just ruthless.

1273
00:53:59,806 --> 00:54:02,623
I told her about my parents
and she followed it up with,

1274
00:54:02,623 --> 00:54:04,596
"Oh, so no trust fund?"

1275
00:54:04,596 --> 00:54:06,036
- Oh my God.

1276
00:54:06,036 --> 00:54:08,310
- I know her parents pretty well.

1277
00:54:08,310 --> 00:54:10,110
The mother is mean as hell too.

1278
00:54:10,110 --> 00:54:11,684
- That fucking bitch.

1279
00:54:11,684 --> 00:54:16,419
Deserves to get Ted Bundy'd
but without the fucking charm.

1280
00:54:16,419 --> 00:54:20,577
- I see her father down at
the cabaret once in a while.

1281
00:54:20,577 --> 00:54:23,192
Typical Cedar Falls WASP

1282
00:54:23,192 --> 00:54:26,548
that tries to come in all incognito.

1283
00:54:26,548 --> 00:54:28,322
- Yeah but that's the
kind of cuck she deserves.

1284
00:54:28,322 --> 00:54:29,331
- I know.

1285
00:54:29,331 --> 00:54:31,863
A man that old should never
be wearing Curve cologne

1286
00:54:31,863 --> 00:54:33,866
that he bought at Sam's Club half off.

1287
00:54:33,866 --> 00:54:36,449
(Brock chuckles)

1288
00:54:36,449 --> 00:54:37,995
- You know Skott,

1289
00:54:37,995 --> 00:54:40,806
I have something I've
been meaning to ask you.

1290
00:54:40,806 --> 00:54:43,959
Do you think, some of the
best rock and roll artists

1291
00:54:43,959 --> 00:54:46,990
of our time, if you wanna
talk about Mick Jagger

1292
00:54:46,990 --> 00:54:49,889
or Robert Plant or
maybe Tom Waits perhaps.

1293
00:54:49,889 --> 00:54:53,556
Do you think any of
them ever chose to vape?

1294
00:54:55,383 --> 00:54:58,647
- I would guess that they
do in their free time.

1295
00:54:58,647 --> 00:54:59,821
Behind the cameras.

1296
00:54:59,821 --> 00:55:01,229
- You think so?

1297
00:55:01,229 --> 00:55:02,161
- Oh sure.

1298
00:55:02,161 --> 00:55:06,249
♪ Hoping for the best
but expecting the worst ♪

1299
00:55:06,249 --> 00:55:10,666
♪ Are you gonna drop the bomb or not ♪

1300
00:55:11,939 --> 00:55:16,439
- So, our coven usually meets
on Wednesdays, hump day.

1301
00:55:17,629 --> 00:55:19,953
We usually let out before happy hour

1302
00:55:19,953 --> 00:55:21,820
and we usually have wine.

1303
00:55:21,820 --> 00:55:23,164
- You ready for the night?

1304
00:55:23,164 --> 00:55:24,686
- To be ready for more rituals

1305
00:55:24,686 --> 00:55:26,870
and whatever else might pop up.

1306
00:55:26,870 --> 00:55:29,957
- So, what does that
involve, more rituals?

1307
00:55:29,957 --> 00:55:32,822
- Well, we like to do our
rituals out amongst nature

1308
00:55:32,822 --> 00:55:33,675
and in the woods

1309
00:55:33,675 --> 00:55:36,991
and we usually like to
perform them skyclad.

1310
00:55:36,991 --> 00:55:39,486
- I love going skyclad.

1311
00:55:39,486 --> 00:55:42,223
- You got any more room for members?

1312
00:55:42,223 --> 00:55:46,023
- Well, our brood currently
has about 10 witches

1313
00:55:46,023 --> 00:55:49,467
but we would have room for two warlocks.

1314
00:55:49,467 --> 00:55:52,617
- You know, I'm keen to whip out the wand

1315
00:55:52,617 --> 00:55:54,266
and blow out some magic.

1316
00:55:54,266 --> 00:55:56,099
Expel some fairy dust.

1317
00:55:59,669 --> 00:56:01,328
- So, what's up witches?

1318
00:56:01,328 --> 00:56:02,911
You ready to party?

1319
00:56:04,142 --> 00:56:06,804
- You went out with Burnout Brad?

1320
00:56:06,804 --> 00:56:08,339
- Yeah.

1321
00:56:08,339 --> 00:56:10,229
Someone at church set us up.

1322
00:56:10,229 --> 00:56:12,138
Said he was a little gentleman.

1323
00:56:12,138 --> 00:56:15,353
- Oh, come on, that guy is a total waste.

1324
00:56:15,353 --> 00:56:18,072
He's stoned all the time.

1325
00:56:18,072 --> 00:56:19,066
- Yeah.

1326
00:56:19,066 --> 00:56:20,199
Does he work?

1327
00:56:20,199 --> 00:56:22,456
- Yeah but he's an orderly.

1328
00:56:22,456 --> 00:56:23,506
- What?

1329
00:56:23,506 --> 00:56:24,955
- What's an orderly?

1330
00:56:24,955 --> 00:56:27,403
- It's a hospital attendant.

1331
00:56:27,403 --> 00:56:31,458
Responsible for the
non-medical care of patients.

1332
00:56:31,458 --> 00:56:33,842
- [Angie] Okay, how did he get that job?

1333
00:56:33,842 --> 00:56:36,175
- How does anyone get a job?

1334
00:56:38,031 --> 00:56:39,890
Good point though.

1335
00:56:39,890 --> 00:56:44,890
Who are the other applicants
passed over for Burnout Brad?

1336
00:56:45,182 --> 00:56:46,759
- Wouldn't they drug test?

1337
00:56:46,759 --> 00:56:50,035
- Oh, they do but stoners
are geniuses at working

1338
00:56:50,035 --> 00:56:52,563
their way around a drug test.

1339
00:56:52,563 --> 00:56:56,690
- Tell me you did not go
for a ride in his car.

1340
00:56:56,690 --> 00:56:59,266
- No, no, I took an Uber.
- Okay.

1341
00:56:59,266 --> 00:57:00,743
- Who'd ya get?

1342
00:57:00,743 --> 00:57:02,141
- Uber Jew.

1343
00:57:02,141 --> 00:57:05,391
- Uber Jew, he is the best Uber driver.

1344
00:57:06,792 --> 00:57:08,430
- God, isn't it great?

1345
00:57:08,430 --> 00:57:10,763
He is very Jewish, you know,

1346
00:57:12,040 --> 00:57:13,563
Uber Jewish

1347
00:57:13,563 --> 00:57:15,668
and drives an Uber,

1348
00:57:15,668 --> 00:57:17,251
he is the Uber Jew.

1349
00:57:19,459 --> 00:57:21,391
- Yup.
- Classic.

1350
00:57:21,391 --> 00:57:26,141
You wouldn't believe how many
people don't get that joke.

1351
00:57:27,503 --> 00:57:30,547
- Michelle Pfeiffer, "Grease 2", yeah.

1352
00:57:30,547 --> 00:57:32,111
That's the one with the guy from England

1353
00:57:32,111 --> 00:57:34,619
who plays Sandy's cousin, yeah.

1354
00:57:34,619 --> 00:57:36,071
- The very same.

1355
00:57:36,071 --> 00:57:38,580
Michelle Pfeiffer in her greatest role,

1356
00:57:38,580 --> 00:57:40,921
she needed hell on wheels

1357
00:57:40,921 --> 00:57:45,921
and Michael, man, he burned
hot, he was a cool, cool rider.

1358
00:57:46,101 --> 00:57:48,200
- Yeah, he came to
America his senior year,

1359
00:57:48,200 --> 00:57:50,951
lived with his uncle,
did term papers for cash

1360
00:57:50,951 --> 00:57:54,258
in his uncle's nuclear
fallout shelter to buy parts

1361
00:57:54,258 --> 00:57:57,923
to build a motorcycle to win
the heart of Michelle Pfeiffer.

1362
00:57:57,923 --> 00:57:59,110
- The American dream.

1363
00:57:59,110 --> 00:58:01,345
- Truly is an American musical.

1364
00:58:01,345 --> 00:58:02,961
Rugged individualism.

1365
00:58:02,961 --> 00:58:05,441
Like "Rocky" or "High Noon."

1366
00:58:05,441 --> 00:58:08,549
- It is exactly like "Rocky", Henry.

1367
00:58:08,549 --> 00:58:11,131
The greatest musical of all time.

1368
00:58:11,131 --> 00:58:12,344
I'm so glad you've come around.

1369
00:58:12,344 --> 00:58:13,350
Harold is pleased.

1370
00:58:13,350 --> 00:58:14,223
- Yeah.

1371
00:58:14,223 --> 00:58:17,121
That's why God created a
hipster like you, Harold.

1372
00:58:17,121 --> 00:58:19,420
To enlighten us on all those
things we have set aside

1373
00:58:19,420 --> 00:58:21,253
to donate to Goodwill.

1374
00:58:22,119 --> 00:58:25,868
- I can't take the credit,
I don't mean to insult

1375
00:58:25,868 --> 00:58:29,826
or impugn one's taste, I
just mean to enlighten.

1376
00:58:29,826 --> 00:58:33,576
- [Henry] I truly
appreciate that, my friend.

1377
00:58:35,808 --> 00:58:36,672
- Hey Boss.

1378
00:58:36,672 --> 00:58:38,666
- [Boss] What's up, Mikey?

1379
00:58:38,666 --> 00:58:39,853
- Get me a milk.

1380
00:58:39,853 --> 00:58:41,186
I'm about to bang me some witches.

1381
00:58:41,186 --> 00:58:43,169
- [Bartender] You got it Mikey.

1382
00:58:43,169 --> 00:58:46,772
Hey babe, carpet match the drapes?

1383
00:58:46,772 --> 00:58:47,605
- Wow.

1384
00:58:48,706 --> 00:58:49,539
No.

1385
00:58:50,640 --> 00:58:52,415
- You know they've got that soundtrack

1386
00:58:52,415 --> 00:58:54,674
at Bronshay Records.

1387
00:58:54,674 --> 00:58:55,808
- What soundtrack?

1388
00:58:55,808 --> 00:58:58,225
- [Henry] The "Grease 2" one.

1389
00:58:59,092 --> 00:59:02,421
- Surely, you mean CD or cassette?

1390
00:59:02,421 --> 00:59:03,254
- Vinyl.

1391
00:59:05,193 --> 00:59:06,495
- Wax.

1392
00:59:06,495 --> 00:59:08,414
The "Grease 2" LP.

1393
00:59:08,414 --> 00:59:09,844
On vinyl.

1394
00:59:09,844 --> 00:59:11,630
At Bronshay Records.

1395
00:59:11,630 --> 00:59:13,562
- Yeah, with Michelle
Pfeiffer in the pink coat

1396
00:59:13,562 --> 00:59:16,806
and that guy from England,
right on the cover.

1397
00:59:16,806 --> 00:59:20,464
- The very same, "Grease 2" vinyl, LP.

1398
00:59:20,464 --> 00:59:22,373
You've impressed me today, Henry.

1399
00:59:22,373 --> 00:59:25,623
I have no choice but to take your word.

1400
00:59:26,629 --> 00:59:31,260
- I remember the motorcycle
with the number two on the flag.

1401
00:59:31,260 --> 00:59:32,509
- That is the one.

1402
00:59:32,509 --> 00:59:34,691
There's no way it would be another one.

1403
00:59:34,691 --> 00:59:37,549
Pardon me, Henry, you must excuse me.

1404
00:59:37,549 --> 00:59:39,966
(rock music)

1405
00:59:43,043 --> 00:59:44,532
Excuse me, liquor gentleman.

1406
00:59:44,532 --> 00:59:46,892
Do you have a payphone?

1407
00:59:46,892 --> 00:59:49,098
- [Bartender] Oh, yeah, you
just go round the building,

1408
00:59:49,098 --> 00:59:53,204
go through the time
portal that will take you

1409
00:59:53,204 --> 00:59:57,434
to 30 years ago and it's
on the other side of that

1410
00:59:57,434 --> 00:59:59,356
on this other side of this building,

1411
00:59:59,356 --> 01:00:01,981
past that time portal, 30 years ago.

1412
01:00:01,981 --> 01:00:06,981
- Okay, I recognize your sarcasm
and I compliment you, sir.

1413
01:00:07,296 --> 01:00:09,060
- [Bartender] Just go
use the regular phone

1414
01:00:09,060 --> 01:00:10,256
in Rudy's, Harold.

1415
01:00:10,256 --> 01:00:12,230
- Okay, well, thanks
for calling me Harold.

1416
01:00:12,230 --> 01:00:13,313
Good day sir.

1417
01:00:14,173 --> 01:00:17,267
Cousin Oliver, I am at Rudy's.

1418
01:00:17,267 --> 01:00:20,484
You must prepare the tandem bike at once

1419
01:00:20,484 --> 01:00:22,734
and meet me here posthaste.

1420
01:00:23,948 --> 01:00:26,281
("Head On")

1421
01:00:31,417 --> 01:00:33,023
♪ Makes you wanna feel ♪

1422
01:00:33,023 --> 01:00:34,895
♪ Makes you wanna try ♪

1423
01:00:34,895 --> 01:00:38,199
♪ Makes you wanna blow
the stars from the sky ♪

1424
01:00:38,199 --> 01:00:39,618
♪ I can't stand up ♪

1425
01:00:39,618 --> 01:00:41,718
♪ I can't cool down ♪

1426
01:00:41,718 --> 01:00:45,204
♪ I can't get my head up off the ground ♪

1427
01:00:45,204 --> 01:00:46,728
♪ Makes you wanna feel ♪

1428
01:00:46,728 --> 01:00:49,644
♪ Makes you wanna try ♪

1429
01:00:49,644 --> 01:00:52,415
- Cousin Harold, you're
wearing jean shorts.

1430
01:00:52,415 --> 01:00:55,435
- There are dozens of us, Oliver.

1431
01:00:55,435 --> 01:00:57,031
Dozens.

1432
01:00:57,031 --> 01:00:58,417
Shall we limber up?

1433
01:00:58,417 --> 01:00:59,686
- That's my secret, cousin.

1434
01:00:59,686 --> 01:01:01,749
I'm always limber.

1435
01:01:01,749 --> 01:01:04,082
("Head On")

1436
01:01:13,851 --> 01:01:16,779
- Let's say we hells on wheels, baby.

1437
01:01:16,779 --> 01:01:18,060
- "Cool Rider."

1438
01:01:18,060 --> 01:01:20,221
- To the tandem!

1439
01:01:20,221 --> 01:01:22,742
♪ Yeah, oh yeah ♪

1440
01:01:22,742 --> 01:01:25,977
♪ Oh yeah ♪

1441
01:01:25,977 --> 01:01:29,483
♪ Oh yeah ♪

1442
01:01:29,483 --> 01:01:33,056
♪ Oh yeah ♪

1443
01:01:33,056 --> 01:01:35,223
♪ Oh yeah ♪

1444
01:01:47,031 --> 01:01:52,031
♪ Make sure to tell the tale ♪

1445
01:01:52,177 --> 01:01:57,177
♪ And you'll find that nothing's there ♪

1446
01:01:57,266 --> 01:02:02,266
♪ You'll find that nothing's there ♪

1447
01:02:03,420 --> 01:02:08,420
♪ You'll find that nothing's there ♪

1448
01:02:09,795 --> 01:02:13,365
♪ You'll find that nothing's there ♪

1449
01:02:13,365 --> 01:02:15,494
(crowd cheering)

1450
01:02:15,494 --> 01:02:18,405
- All right, everyone,
we have a nice young lady

1451
01:02:18,405 --> 01:02:21,849
here with us today to sing us a song.

1452
01:02:21,849 --> 01:02:25,432
Give this lovely lady
a warm, warm welcome.

1453
01:02:26,396 --> 01:02:28,485
Give it up for Angie.

1454
01:02:28,485 --> 01:02:31,235
(crowd cheering)

1455
01:02:47,750 --> 01:02:49,833
That's okay, that's fine.

1456
01:02:51,406 --> 01:02:53,406
You'll get it next time.

1457
01:02:54,552 --> 01:02:55,385
Uh, okay.

1458
01:03:01,795 --> 01:03:03,381
- Hey.
- Hi.

1459
01:03:03,381 --> 01:03:04,999
- Don't worry about it.

1460
01:03:04,999 --> 01:03:05,832
- Thanks.

1461
01:03:06,774 --> 01:03:09,588
- It's a big, beautiful world out there,

1462
01:03:09,588 --> 01:03:12,411
try not to ever fear a stage.

1463
01:03:12,411 --> 01:03:13,411
- Thank you.

1464
01:03:19,516 --> 01:03:22,801
♪ You went the wrong way ♪

1465
01:03:22,801 --> 01:03:25,697
♪ Got on the wrong train ♪

1466
01:03:25,697 --> 01:03:27,043
♪ Nothing to say ♪

1467
01:03:27,043 --> 01:03:28,661
♪ You're playing your game ♪

1468
01:03:28,661 --> 01:03:33,007
♪ The winds have changed, yeah ♪

1469
01:03:33,007 --> 01:03:35,643
- So, you still work at
Sharky's over the hill?

1470
01:03:35,643 --> 01:03:36,476
- Yup.

1471
01:03:37,407 --> 01:03:39,759
- That is where I learned to fight.

1472
01:03:39,759 --> 01:03:41,556
- That's where everyone
learns how to fight.

1473
01:03:41,556 --> 01:03:42,668
(laughs)

1474
01:03:42,668 --> 01:03:45,552
- Oh my God, football
players fighting over some

1475
01:03:45,552 --> 01:03:48,968
fat blonde from Kossuth County.

1476
01:03:48,968 --> 01:03:50,418
- Yeah but then she ends up going home

1477
01:03:50,418 --> 01:03:52,969
with a Delta Sigma frat boy.

1478
01:03:52,969 --> 01:03:57,886
- And then when he doesn't
call, she stalks him at his job.

1479
01:03:59,384 --> 01:04:02,262
♪ When they're gone, we find our bliss ♪

1480
01:04:02,262 --> 01:04:04,950
♪ They try to come back, I say this ♪

1481
01:04:04,950 --> 01:04:08,490
- Still go down to the
Fourth Street Bridge?

1482
01:04:08,490 --> 01:04:09,323
- Yeah.

1483
01:04:10,758 --> 01:04:13,519
Every once in a while when
I'm feeling a little down.

1484
01:04:13,519 --> 01:04:14,651
- You should never go to a bridge

1485
01:04:14,651 --> 01:04:16,415
when you're depressed, Clint.

1486
01:04:16,415 --> 01:04:17,669
(both laughing)

1487
01:04:17,669 --> 01:04:18,502
- Yeah.

1488
01:04:18,502 --> 01:04:20,303
- Why do you like it down there so much?

1489
01:04:20,303 --> 01:04:22,121
- Every time I go down there,
it just sort of makes me,

1490
01:04:22,121 --> 01:04:24,713
it picks me up, makes me
feel better, you know?

1491
01:04:24,713 --> 01:04:25,721
- You like it there, huh?

1492
01:04:25,721 --> 01:04:27,295
- Yeah.

1493
01:04:27,295 --> 01:04:28,776
Can't explain it.

1494
01:04:28,776 --> 01:04:29,609
- I can.

1495
01:04:31,265 --> 01:04:32,315
You realize that's the last place

1496
01:04:32,315 --> 01:04:34,648
you saw your parents, right?

1497
01:04:38,256 --> 01:04:40,200
You know your mom used to take you there,

1498
01:04:40,200 --> 01:04:41,710
wait for your father.

1499
01:04:41,710 --> 01:04:44,609
Father worked at the bank down the street.

1500
01:04:44,609 --> 01:04:47,330
Just right off Fourth Street.

1501
01:04:47,330 --> 01:04:48,398
It's a beautiful bank.

1502
01:04:48,398 --> 01:04:51,648
Your father used to have lunch with me,

1503
01:04:52,855 --> 01:04:56,291
you know I owned the store down the way.

1504
01:04:56,291 --> 01:04:59,849
God, your father was never
ashamed to be seen with me.

1505
01:04:59,849 --> 01:05:03,516
To have lunch with him
is like he was proud.

1506
01:05:04,794 --> 01:05:09,541
Of course we always had a
flush account at that bank.

1507
01:05:09,541 --> 01:05:12,574
Yeah, that's the last
place you saw your parents.

1508
01:05:12,574 --> 01:05:16,407
God dammit, I'll never forget that day.

1509
01:05:16,407 --> 01:05:19,106
They dropped you off
to me, I picked you up,

1510
01:05:19,106 --> 01:05:23,689
they left on that trip, I
took you to Adeleine's place.

1511
01:05:26,490 --> 01:05:30,197
They never came back from that trip

1512
01:05:30,197 --> 01:05:33,530
and you were at Adeleine's from then on.

1513
01:05:36,256 --> 01:05:39,930
- You know I still see
her about every week.

1514
01:05:39,930 --> 01:05:42,922
She says she prays for you.

1515
01:05:42,922 --> 01:05:44,255
- Really?
- Yeah.

1516
01:05:48,422 --> 01:05:52,089
I'll take every prayer
that saint can spare.

1517
01:05:52,997 --> 01:05:53,914
God dammit.

1518
01:05:55,791 --> 01:05:57,874
How'd you end up so good?

1519
01:05:59,434 --> 01:06:00,517
- You know...

1520
01:06:02,038 --> 01:06:03,738
I was raised right.

1521
01:06:03,738 --> 01:06:05,821
(laughs)

1522
01:06:07,372 --> 01:06:09,907
- Thank God for Scotch.

1523
01:06:09,907 --> 01:06:12,447
Thank God for Scotch, Clint.

1524
01:06:12,447 --> 01:06:15,614
(mellow guitar music)

1525
01:06:50,098 --> 01:06:54,133
♪ Don't be sad, I know you will ♪

1526
01:06:54,133 --> 01:06:56,133
- No one ever wanted me.

1527
01:06:58,030 --> 01:06:59,530
My parents didn't.

1528
01:07:02,323 --> 01:07:05,990
No one ever picked me
up from the orphanage.

1529
01:07:09,012 --> 01:07:10,512
But you know what?

1530
01:07:11,437 --> 01:07:12,604
Somebody will.

1531
01:07:14,987 --> 01:07:18,820
A sweet, kind gentle man
will love me someday.

1532
01:07:21,685 --> 01:07:23,602
Everyone deserves that.

1533
01:07:26,578 --> 01:07:28,245
Wishes do come true.

1534
01:07:29,791 --> 01:07:31,291
Prayers are heard.

1535
01:07:32,855 --> 01:07:36,022
(mellow guitar music)

1536
01:07:41,297 --> 01:07:43,576
- There are more records, Cousin Harold.

1537
01:07:43,576 --> 01:07:44,909
You'll find one.

1538
01:07:45,790 --> 01:07:48,430
- Perhaps there's more
but this one was mine.

1539
01:07:48,430 --> 01:07:51,160
And now it is gone and I don't know why

1540
01:07:51,160 --> 01:07:52,580
and I don't know who.

1541
01:07:52,580 --> 01:07:54,856
- Well, obviously
somebody else appreciated

1542
01:07:54,856 --> 01:07:57,865
the greatest musical ever put on a film.

1543
01:07:57,865 --> 01:08:01,507
- Who, aside from you
and I sitting here today?

1544
01:08:01,507 --> 01:08:04,256
I mean I guess, I don't
know, maybe somebody else,

1545
01:08:04,256 --> 01:08:08,506
somewhere in this town has
a nice Victrola console.

1546
01:08:09,485 --> 01:08:13,068
They drop the needle
down, side A, track 1.

1547
01:08:14,157 --> 01:08:15,050
Can you hear it, Oliver?

1548
01:08:15,050 --> 01:08:16,585
Can you hear it?

1549
01:08:16,585 --> 01:08:18,368
You know where they're going?

1550
01:08:18,368 --> 01:08:20,538
They're going back,

1551
01:08:20,538 --> 01:08:22,806
back to school again.

1552
01:08:22,806 --> 01:08:23,752
And we're not.

1553
01:08:23,752 --> 01:08:25,379
We're here.

1554
01:08:25,379 --> 01:08:26,975
- Cousin Harold.
- Yes?

1555
01:08:26,975 --> 01:08:29,094
- I smell a Nectar Wookie.

1556
01:08:29,094 --> 01:08:29,927
- As do I.

1557
01:08:31,144 --> 01:08:33,684
- Aw, hey!
- It's this guy again.

1558
01:08:33,684 --> 01:08:37,547
- So I was on this walkabout the other day

1559
01:08:37,547 --> 01:08:40,560
and tripping on some wild peyote.

1560
01:08:40,560 --> 01:08:43,941
Ended up at this Bronshay Records store

1561
01:08:43,941 --> 01:08:46,714
and I seen this and I was like

1562
01:08:46,714 --> 01:08:50,388
that bearded Napster dude would like this.

1563
01:08:50,388 --> 01:08:51,471
So, I took it

1564
01:08:52,529 --> 01:08:53,612
and I'm like,

1565
01:08:55,047 --> 01:08:56,464
giving it to you.

1566
01:08:58,290 --> 01:09:00,852
- You purchased this or
whatever you did for it, for me?

1567
01:09:00,852 --> 01:09:01,860
- I took it, yeah.

1568
01:09:01,860 --> 01:09:02,693
- For me?

1569
01:09:02,693 --> 01:09:03,526
- Yeah.

1570
01:09:05,997 --> 01:09:09,309
- Harold is overjoyed, you
sweet, smelly bear mite.

1571
01:09:09,309 --> 01:09:11,226
- I just--
- Do I smell?

1572
01:09:12,164 --> 01:09:15,336
- I'm not even mad about
no sleeve, I'm just,

1573
01:09:15,336 --> 01:09:18,016
I'm touched you would give this to me.

1574
01:09:18,016 --> 01:09:20,841
I feel as though maybe, you and I have,

1575
01:09:20,841 --> 01:09:22,572
not been on the same foot.

1576
01:09:22,572 --> 01:09:24,405
- No, I'm on two feet.

1577
01:09:25,699 --> 01:09:27,908
- Well, I mean I think we can be friends,

1578
01:09:27,908 --> 01:09:31,244
I think I could teach you about Scotch.

1579
01:09:31,244 --> 01:09:32,433
- Aw, butterscotch!

1580
01:09:32,433 --> 01:09:36,980
- Maybe I'll walk about
somewhere with you, I don't know.

1581
01:09:36,980 --> 01:09:38,813
I think I, we're good.

1582
01:09:40,204 --> 01:09:43,018
I, I decry, sir, I decry!

1583
01:09:43,018 --> 01:09:46,703
That from this day forth, a
Nectar Wookie and a hipster,

1584
01:09:46,703 --> 01:09:50,808
we shall co-exist together,
together in the Cedar Valley.

1585
01:09:50,808 --> 01:09:51,963
We will be one.

1586
01:09:51,963 --> 01:09:53,963
- Together, I like that.

1587
01:09:57,141 --> 01:09:59,492
- You wanna take the
weekend to think about it?

1588
01:09:59,492 --> 01:10:02,013
Nah, how about you just come with us

1589
01:10:02,013 --> 01:10:04,205
and then you can enjoy your weekend.

1590
01:10:04,205 --> 01:10:05,557
Yeah,

1591
01:10:05,557 --> 01:10:07,153
yeah.

1592
01:10:07,153 --> 01:10:09,211
You're making the right decision here.

1593
01:10:09,211 --> 01:10:10,481
Yeah.

1594
01:10:10,481 --> 01:10:13,096
Okay, well I'll take care of everything

1595
01:10:13,096 --> 01:10:15,036
and you enjoy your weekend.

1596
01:10:15,036 --> 01:10:16,643
This was a good choice.

1597
01:10:16,643 --> 01:10:17,893
All right, bye.

1598
01:10:19,281 --> 01:10:22,364
("Just Like Heaven")

1599
01:10:36,635 --> 01:10:38,835
- [Boss] What year was
that tornado in Oelwein?

1600
01:10:38,835 --> 01:10:40,426
- [The Don] 1968.

1601
01:10:40,426 --> 01:10:41,656
F5.

1602
01:10:41,656 --> 01:10:43,462
- Is that the same one
that hit Charleston?

1603
01:10:43,462 --> 01:10:44,355
- Yep.

1604
01:10:44,355 --> 01:10:47,060
Took out a whole major
swathe right through Oelwein.

1605
01:10:47,060 --> 01:10:49,099
Took out the high school, took
out a bunch of businesses,

1606
01:10:49,099 --> 01:10:50,778
took out our family's house.

1607
01:10:50,778 --> 01:10:52,870
- Oh my God.
- I was just a little kid.

1608
01:10:52,870 --> 01:10:55,347
But yeah, that was something.

1609
01:10:55,347 --> 01:10:56,650
But the town rebuilt, you know?

1610
01:10:56,650 --> 01:10:59,223
It's that Italian resilience.

1611
01:10:59,223 --> 01:11:02,289
A town full of Italians did a good job.

1612
01:11:02,289 --> 01:11:03,122
- Shows a lot of character

1613
01:11:03,122 --> 01:11:04,314
for a town like that to come back.

1614
01:11:04,314 --> 01:11:06,350
- Yep, all the restaurants, all the--

1615
01:11:06,350 --> 01:11:08,178
- Speaking of restaurants,
that's the best Italian food

1616
01:11:08,178 --> 01:11:09,217
I've ever had in my life.

1617
01:11:09,217 --> 01:11:10,050
- Yeah?

1618
01:11:10,050 --> 01:11:11,168
- Oelwein Italian food?

1619
01:11:11,168 --> 01:11:12,043
Outstanding.

1620
01:11:12,043 --> 01:11:14,971
Clayton County has that
pizza with that cheese still.

1621
01:11:14,971 --> 01:11:16,713
Leo's, Leo's is outstanding.

1622
01:11:16,713 --> 01:11:19,255
Leo's still has that Italian beef special

1623
01:11:19,255 --> 01:11:22,320
that you used to be able to
get at Sportsman's on that--

1624
01:11:22,320 --> 01:11:24,139
- That's right, back when
Al Capone came through town.

1625
01:11:24,139 --> 01:11:25,272
(laughs)

1626
01:11:25,272 --> 01:11:26,105
Stopping at Sportsman's.

1627
01:11:26,105 --> 01:11:27,396
- That road, that's the road that leads to

1628
01:11:27,396 --> 01:11:28,404
Hazleton, right?

1629
01:11:28,404 --> 01:11:29,420
- Mmhmm.
- Yeah.

1630
01:11:29,420 --> 01:11:31,520
Sportsman's was out there,
that place was awesome.

1631
01:11:31,520 --> 01:11:34,326
- But Waterloo has pretty
good Italian food too.

1632
01:11:34,326 --> 01:11:36,445
- Yeah, Waterloo is a close second.

1633
01:11:36,445 --> 01:11:39,564
Waterloo has, what's that new place on--

1634
01:11:39,564 --> 01:11:40,656
- Basil's Pizza?

1635
01:11:40,656 --> 01:11:42,348
- Yeah, right across
the bridge, yeah, yeah.

1636
01:11:42,348 --> 01:11:43,181
- Is that the one?

1637
01:11:43,181 --> 01:11:44,014
- Yeah, the Neapolitan place.

1638
01:11:44,014 --> 01:11:45,568
- Yeah, the wood fired, yeah.

1639
01:11:45,568 --> 01:11:47,270
- That cook's a genius.

1640
01:11:47,270 --> 01:11:49,056
God, don't piss him off though, man.

1641
01:11:49,056 --> 01:11:50,639
That's certifiable.

1642
01:11:52,346 --> 01:11:55,819
Brown Bottle's pizza's
outstanding, they got that--

1643
01:11:55,819 --> 01:11:56,652
- They've been around a long time.

1644
01:11:56,652 --> 01:11:59,419
- Yeah and they have, what do they have,

1645
01:11:59,419 --> 01:12:01,853
they have that chicken
Parmesan, that's real good.

1646
01:12:01,853 --> 01:12:03,787
- Yeah, there's Lighthouse.

1647
01:12:03,787 --> 01:12:05,975
- What's that on, Fifth?
- Fifth Street, yeah.

1648
01:12:05,975 --> 01:12:08,818
- And then, oh God, Mama Nick's.

1649
01:12:08,818 --> 01:12:10,677
- Mama Nick's Circle Pizzeria.

1650
01:12:10,677 --> 01:12:13,219
- Oh God, it's so good
there, he's got that buffet.

1651
01:12:13,219 --> 01:12:14,216
- Buffet at lunch time, yeah.

1652
01:12:14,216 --> 01:12:16,736
- That guy's Greek and he's
nailed the Italian food.

1653
01:12:16,736 --> 01:12:18,301
- Yep.

1654
01:12:18,301 --> 01:12:19,519
- Outstanding.

1655
01:12:19,519 --> 01:12:21,146
- Do you know there's something
that I was gonna ask you

1656
01:12:21,146 --> 01:12:23,330
but I didn't wanna show any disrespect.

1657
01:12:23,330 --> 01:12:25,448
(chuckles)

1658
01:12:25,448 --> 01:12:29,849
- The Don talking about
respect, I love it.

1659
01:12:29,849 --> 01:12:31,840
Oh hell, Vincent, you
could ask me anything, man.

1660
01:12:31,840 --> 01:12:34,173
I won't take any disrespect.

1661
01:12:35,208 --> 01:12:39,458
- Well, why a strip club
and adult bookstore owner?

1662
01:12:45,101 --> 01:12:48,345
- Well, I don't know, when I was younger,

1663
01:12:48,345 --> 01:12:50,656
they came available for sale.

1664
01:12:50,656 --> 01:12:53,520
I've never seen one
closed down in the area.

1665
01:12:53,520 --> 01:12:55,864
Figured it was a wise investment

1666
01:12:55,864 --> 01:12:58,424
'cause obviously there's
a market share in the area

1667
01:12:58,424 --> 01:13:02,841
and I thought, well they
make money, so I bought them

1668
01:13:03,975 --> 01:13:05,873
and I've made money with them

1669
01:13:05,873 --> 01:13:07,228
but I've never seen one close in the area

1670
01:13:07,228 --> 01:13:10,395
so I thought it was a wise investment.

1671
01:13:11,944 --> 01:13:14,027
Do I feel guilt at times?

1672
01:13:14,925 --> 01:13:15,758
Yeah.

1673
01:13:16,919 --> 01:13:18,002
I feel shame.

1674
01:13:19,691 --> 01:13:20,524
Oh yeah.

1675
01:13:21,917 --> 01:13:24,417
But I guess, I guess I'm weak.

1676
01:13:27,250 --> 01:13:30,568
It comes down to decisions
I guess you make in life,

1677
01:13:30,568 --> 01:13:35,068
do you wanna be affluent and
flawed or pious and poor?

1678
01:13:38,475 --> 01:13:43,475
- "And he said to me, 'my
grace is sufficient for you

1679
01:13:43,524 --> 01:13:47,107
"for my power is made
perfect in weakness'"

1680
01:13:49,150 --> 01:13:50,733
- Corinthians 12:9?

1681
01:13:51,650 --> 01:13:52,650
- Very good.

1682
01:13:54,570 --> 01:13:56,566
Not Bon Jovi, like some people think.

1683
01:13:56,566 --> 01:13:57,417
(laughs)

1684
01:13:57,417 --> 01:13:59,568
- We tend to pick up
theology in my line of work

1685
01:13:59,568 --> 01:14:00,901
sooner or later.

1686
01:14:01,888 --> 01:14:03,883
- "Livin' on a Prayer",
is that in the Bible?

1687
01:14:03,883 --> 01:14:05,615
(laughs)

1688
01:14:05,615 --> 01:14:06,728
I'm not sure.

1689
01:14:06,728 --> 01:14:08,503
- It is in the New Jersey version.

1690
01:14:08,503 --> 01:14:12,094
- That's right, the New
New Jersey Testament.

1691
01:14:12,094 --> 01:14:14,635
- The King James Gandolfini version.

1692
01:14:14,635 --> 01:14:16,052
- That's the one.

1693
01:14:17,723 --> 01:14:20,484
("Just Like Heaven")

1694
01:14:20,484 --> 01:14:22,436
- Hey man, how's it going?

1695
01:14:22,436 --> 01:14:23,317
- Great, how 'bout you?

1696
01:14:23,317 --> 01:14:24,150
- Good, good.

1697
01:14:24,150 --> 01:14:25,702
Good job on that account,
knew you had it in ya.

1698
01:14:25,702 --> 01:14:26,928
- Appreciate it, appreciate it.

1699
01:14:26,928 --> 01:14:28,499
Took some work but I got there.

1700
01:14:28,499 --> 01:14:31,565
Hey, so what's the story,
I got told to call you

1701
01:14:31,565 --> 01:14:33,035
the Adult Shop Mob?

1702
01:14:33,035 --> 01:14:35,331
- Aw man, not anymore, new job now.

1703
01:14:35,331 --> 01:14:36,611
- All right, all right.

1704
01:14:36,611 --> 01:14:38,134
Doesn't look like you with those shades.

1705
01:14:38,134 --> 01:14:41,001
- The pink shirt there, mix
a little red in the laundry?

1706
01:14:41,001 --> 01:14:43,371
- All right, all right,
fair enough, fair enough.

1707
01:14:43,371 --> 01:14:46,142
Hey, my uncle says he still
owes you one by the way.

1708
01:14:46,142 --> 01:14:48,802
- No, no, tell your uncle we're even.

1709
01:14:48,802 --> 01:14:51,764
♪ Spinning across that dizzy edge ♪

1710
01:14:51,764 --> 01:14:55,029
♪ I kissed her face, I kissed her head ♪

1711
01:14:55,029 --> 01:15:00,029
♪ Dreamed of all the different
ways, I had to make her glow ♪

1712
01:15:01,370 --> 01:15:05,390
♪ Why are you so far away she said ♪

1713
01:15:05,390 --> 01:15:10,390
♪ Don't you ever know that
I'm in love with you ♪

1714
01:15:10,412 --> 01:15:14,162
♪ Yeah, I'm in love with you ♪

1715
01:15:16,742 --> 01:15:17,643
- Hey.

1716
01:15:17,643 --> 01:15:20,146
- Oh, there he is, how you doin' kid?

1717
01:15:20,146 --> 01:15:21,784
- I am great.

1718
01:15:21,784 --> 01:15:23,284
- What's goin' on?

1719
01:15:24,198 --> 01:15:27,201
- I closed the Lock account.

1720
01:15:27,201 --> 01:15:29,353
- The Lock account?

1721
01:15:29,353 --> 01:15:31,186
- Yeah.
- You got that?

1722
01:15:32,510 --> 01:15:35,534
- I was really persistent and
I worked really, really hard

1723
01:15:35,534 --> 01:15:38,451
and it worked, it worked, you know?

1724
01:15:39,387 --> 01:15:41,635
- Oh God, good job buddy, good job.

1725
01:15:41,635 --> 01:15:42,537
- I mean who would have
thought that my first one

1726
01:15:42,537 --> 01:15:44,814
would be that big?

1727
01:15:44,814 --> 01:15:45,948
- You're employed for the next

1728
01:15:45,948 --> 01:15:47,976
five to seven years on that one.

1729
01:15:47,976 --> 01:15:51,398
One account, that's a great start.

1730
01:15:51,398 --> 01:15:52,912
I knew you had it in there,

1731
01:15:52,912 --> 01:15:55,726
I'd like to say you learned
salesman ship from your uncle

1732
01:15:55,726 --> 01:15:59,392
but it's pretty easy to
sell though, right buddy?

1733
01:15:59,392 --> 01:16:02,057
God, that is awesome, how did you do it?

1734
01:16:02,057 --> 01:16:02,930
How did you do that?

1735
01:16:02,930 --> 01:16:07,275
- Well you know, all I had
to do was lock it down.

1736
01:16:07,275 --> 01:16:08,231
- Oh my God.

1737
01:16:08,231 --> 01:16:09,064
Jesus.

1738
01:16:09,064 --> 01:16:11,147
(laughs)

1739
01:16:12,941 --> 01:16:16,166
- Well, anyway, I'm gonna
go out and celebrate,

1740
01:16:16,166 --> 01:16:18,498
would you like to join me?

1741
01:16:18,498 --> 01:16:19,422
- You know what, buddy?

1742
01:16:19,422 --> 01:16:21,480
I'm good here, I'm good
here for the night.

1743
01:16:21,480 --> 01:16:22,852
- Okay.

1744
01:16:22,852 --> 01:16:24,829
- Good job, buddy, good job.

1745
01:16:24,829 --> 01:16:25,662
- See ya.

1746
01:16:26,937 --> 01:16:27,937
- Hey Clint.

1747
01:16:30,583 --> 01:16:32,857
Your father would be very proud.

1748
01:16:32,857 --> 01:16:33,996
("Just Like Heaven")

1749
01:16:33,996 --> 01:16:34,973
♪ Lost and lonely ♪

1750
01:16:34,973 --> 01:16:38,266
♪ You, strange as angels ♪

1751
01:16:38,266 --> 01:16:41,407
♪ Dancing in the deepest oceans ♪

1752
01:16:41,407 --> 01:16:43,729
♪ Twisting in the water ♪

1753
01:16:43,729 --> 01:16:46,859
♪ You're just like a dream ♪

1754
01:16:46,859 --> 01:16:50,442
♪ You're just like a dream ♪

1755
01:17:10,536 --> 01:17:13,549
♪ Daylight licked me into shape ♪

1756
01:17:13,549 --> 01:17:16,814
♪ I must have been asleep for days ♪

1757
01:17:16,814 --> 01:17:19,975
♪ And moving lips to breathe her name ♪

1758
01:17:19,975 --> 01:17:23,189
♪ I opened up my eyes ♪

1759
01:17:23,189 --> 01:17:28,189
♪ And found myself alone, alone,
alone above a raging sea ♪

1760
01:17:29,706 --> 01:17:32,880
♪ Stole the only girl I loved ♪

1761
01:17:32,880 --> 01:17:36,154
♪ And drowned her deep inside of me ♪

1762
01:17:36,154 --> 01:17:39,316
♪ You soft and only ♪

1763
01:17:39,316 --> 01:17:42,571
♪ You lost and lonely ♪

1764
01:17:42,571 --> 01:17:45,821
♪ You just like heaven ♪

1765
01:17:48,174 --> 01:17:51,030
- [Colonel] Welcome to the
Colonels Open Talent Showcase.

1766
01:17:51,030 --> 01:17:51,920
(cheering)

1767
01:17:51,920 --> 01:17:52,823
- This girl came up to me
in the club the other day

1768
01:17:52,823 --> 01:17:55,393
and asked me if I wanted
to have hot monkey sex.

1769
01:17:55,393 --> 01:17:56,226
Didn't know what that was

1770
01:17:56,226 --> 01:17:57,936
but I knew I wanted to fuck someone.

1771
01:17:57,936 --> 01:18:00,475
So, we go back to her
place, start getting it on.

1772
01:18:00,475 --> 01:18:02,849
She gets naked on the
bed, I get behind her,

1773
01:18:02,849 --> 01:18:05,264
start fucking her, you know and
I started to shit in my hand

1774
01:18:05,264 --> 01:18:06,398
and throwing it at her.

1775
01:18:06,398 --> 01:18:08,372
(crowd laughing)

1776
01:18:08,372 --> 01:18:10,789
- You know this kid's act is,

1777
01:18:11,639 --> 01:18:12,472
familiar.

1778
01:18:13,980 --> 01:18:16,175
- Yeah but he's making it his own.

1779
01:18:16,175 --> 01:18:19,219
Frankly, I think it's better.

1780
01:18:19,219 --> 01:18:20,302
- God dammit.

1781
01:18:21,697 --> 01:18:23,492
- You know Jesus is coming back soon.

1782
01:18:23,492 --> 01:18:25,652
(cheering)

1783
01:18:25,652 --> 01:18:27,993
But when he comes back,
he's gonna be black,

1784
01:18:27,993 --> 01:18:29,665
he was a Jew the first time
but I want him to be black

1785
01:18:29,665 --> 01:18:31,322
this time so that way with
all the southern baptists,

1786
01:18:31,322 --> 01:18:33,075
I can be like, get over here ni--

1787
01:18:33,075 --> 01:18:35,158
(laughs)

1788
01:18:36,847 --> 01:18:37,680
- Aw.

1789
01:18:38,787 --> 01:18:40,704
- What's the punchline?

1790
01:18:44,468 --> 01:18:46,465
(laughs)

1791
01:18:46,465 --> 01:18:49,046
That's funny kid, right on.

1792
01:18:49,046 --> 01:18:50,209
- All right everybody,

1793
01:18:50,209 --> 01:18:54,014
we have a nice young lady
here to sing us a song.

1794
01:18:54,014 --> 01:18:56,186
Everybody welcome Angie.

1795
01:18:56,186 --> 01:18:59,186
(audience cheering)

1796
01:19:13,364 --> 01:19:18,364
♪ Sometimes flowers grow too fast ♪

1797
01:19:20,103 --> 01:19:25,103
♪ Sometimes they never last ♪

1798
01:19:25,796 --> 01:19:30,796
♪ Sometimes we dwell on the past ♪

1799
01:19:31,561 --> 01:19:36,452
♪ Never knowing what comes next ♪

1800
01:19:36,452 --> 01:19:41,452
♪ And although we try,
try, try, try, try ♪

1801
01:19:44,413 --> 01:19:49,413
♪ We never seem to get it right ♪

1802
01:19:49,923 --> 01:19:54,923
♪ So we ask why, why, why, why, why ♪

1803
01:19:56,391 --> 01:19:59,308
♪ How do we get by ♪

1804
01:20:02,943 --> 01:20:03,776
- Huh,

1805
01:20:05,744 --> 01:20:07,327
she looks familiar.

1806
01:20:11,997 --> 01:20:12,830
Oh yeah.

1807
01:20:14,527 --> 01:20:15,444
Cheesecake.

1808
01:20:18,835 --> 01:20:23,835
♪ Always acting tough
even though we're small ♪

1809
01:20:24,032 --> 01:20:29,032
♪ And although we try,
try, try, try, try ♪

1810
01:20:32,029 --> 01:20:37,029
♪ We never seem to get it right ♪

1811
01:20:38,132 --> 01:20:43,132
♪ So we ask why, why, why, why, why ♪

1812
01:20:45,060 --> 01:20:47,977
♪ How do we get by ♪

1813
01:20:50,144 --> 01:20:53,144
(audience clapping)

1814
01:20:57,046 --> 01:20:58,883
- [Colonel] Thank you Angie!

1815
01:20:58,883 --> 01:20:59,716
- Hey!

1816
01:21:00,602 --> 01:21:02,217
Great job.

1817
01:21:02,217 --> 01:21:04,320
That was insane, everyone loved it.

1818
01:21:04,320 --> 01:21:05,695
Everyone loved it.

1819
01:21:05,695 --> 01:21:08,229
- I can't believe I just did that.

1820
01:21:08,229 --> 01:21:09,878
- I don't know how it took you this long.

1821
01:21:09,878 --> 01:21:12,714
You were so good, you were so good.

1822
01:21:12,714 --> 01:21:13,921
- I love you

1823
01:21:13,921 --> 01:21:15,338
- I love you too.

1824
01:21:19,360 --> 01:21:21,943
(mellow music)

1825
01:21:35,434 --> 01:21:40,434
♪ It's time I said these words ♪

1826
01:21:42,450 --> 01:21:47,450
♪ I had to write them down ♪

1827
01:21:49,481 --> 01:21:54,481
♪ Tonight, we'll talk like birds ♪

1828
01:21:55,055 --> 01:22:00,055
♪ I found you and my
heart starts to pound ♪

1829
01:22:01,829 --> 01:22:06,829
♪ A river's long, we'll meet
in the middle and swim ♪

1830
01:22:08,654 --> 01:22:13,654
♪ I almost drown, now
I'm breathing again ♪

1831
01:22:17,680 --> 01:22:22,680
♪ When my world starts spinning round ♪

1832
01:22:24,006 --> 01:22:29,006
♪ When the bonfire lights the wind ♪

1833
01:22:31,294 --> 01:22:36,294
♪ When my feet fly off the ground ♪

1834
01:22:37,248 --> 01:22:40,812
♪ You met me ♪

1835
01:22:40,812 --> 01:22:43,312
♪ I found you ♪

1836
01:23:00,079 --> 01:23:05,079
♪ You've got a lot of nerve ♪

1837
01:23:07,127 --> 01:23:12,127
♪ To make my raincloud burst ♪

1838
01:23:13,792 --> 01:23:18,792
♪ Got an easy I task I heard ♪

1839
01:23:19,725 --> 01:23:24,725
♪ Dropped in the play
and it's unrehearsed ♪

1840
01:23:26,530 --> 01:23:29,881
♪ A river's strong ♪

1841
01:23:29,881 --> 01:23:33,462
♪ We'll meet in the middle and swim ♪

1842
01:23:33,462 --> 01:23:36,696
♪ I almost drown ♪

1843
01:23:36,696 --> 01:23:41,696
♪ Now I'm breathing again ♪

1844
01:23:41,904 --> 01:23:46,904
♪ When my world stars spinning round ♪

1845
01:23:48,834 --> 01:23:53,834
♪ When the bonfire lights the wind ♪

1846
01:23:55,859 --> 01:24:00,859
♪ When my feet fly off the ground ♪

1847
01:24:01,916 --> 01:24:05,447
♪ You met me ♪

1848
01:24:05,447 --> 01:24:08,919
♪ I found you ♪

1849
01:24:08,919 --> 01:24:12,910
♪ I love you ♪

1850
01:24:12,910 --> 01:24:16,827
♪ I've fallen love struck sick ♪

1851
01:24:21,762 --> 01:24:22,896
- [Angie] Who knew?

1852
01:24:22,896 --> 01:24:26,153
That all those pennies and
prayers off that bridge

1853
01:24:26,153 --> 01:24:27,810
and everything I wished for,

1854
01:24:27,810 --> 01:24:28,643
came true.

1855
01:24:29,605 --> 01:24:32,932
A boy named Clint from Cedar Falls, Iowa.

1856
01:24:32,932 --> 01:24:36,126
I will never fear a stage or anything else

1857
01:24:36,126 --> 01:24:39,126
in this beautiful world, ever again.

1858
01:24:40,524 --> 01:24:43,441
God, I love the springtime in Iowa.

1859
01:24:44,316 --> 01:24:47,233
("Pretty in Pink")

1860
01:24:58,696 --> 01:25:02,068
♪ Caroline laughs, and
it's raining all day ♪

1861
01:25:02,068 --> 01:25:05,584
♪ She wants to be one of the girls ♪

1862
01:25:05,584 --> 01:25:09,248
♪ She lives in the place
in the side of our lives ♪

1863
01:25:09,248 --> 01:25:12,862
♪ Where nothing is ever put straight ♪

1864
01:25:12,862 --> 01:25:14,320
♪ She turns herself round ♪

1865
01:25:14,320 --> 01:25:16,336
♪ And she smiles and she says ♪

1866
01:25:16,336 --> 01:25:20,158
♪ This is it, that's the end of the joke ♪

1867
01:25:20,158 --> 01:25:23,402
♪ And loses herself in
the dreaming and sleep ♪

1868
01:25:23,402 --> 01:25:28,402
♪ And her lovers walk
through in their coats, yes ♪

1869
01:25:29,301 --> 01:25:32,873
♪ Pretty in pink ♪

1870
01:25:32,873 --> 01:25:36,443
♪ Isn't she ♪

1871
01:25:36,443 --> 01:25:40,347
♪ Pretty in pink ♪

1872
01:25:40,347 --> 01:25:42,680
♪ Isn't she ♪

1873
01:25:56,424 --> 01:25:59,692
♪ All of her lovers
all talk of her notes ♪

1874
01:25:59,692 --> 01:26:03,627
♪ And the flowers that they never sent ♪

1875
01:26:03,627 --> 01:26:08,627
♪ And wasn't she easy ♪

1876
01:26:09,560 --> 01:26:12,689
♪ Isn't she pretty in pink ♪

1877
01:26:12,689 --> 01:26:15,904
♪ The one who insists he
was first in the line ♪

1878
01:26:15,904 --> 01:26:19,714
♪ Is the last to remember her name ♪

1879
01:26:19,714 --> 01:26:23,019
♪ He's walking around in
this dress that she wore ♪

1880
01:26:23,019 --> 01:26:27,106
♪ She is gone, but the joke's the same ♪

1881
01:26:27,106 --> 01:26:30,694
♪ Pretty in pink ♪

1882
01:26:30,694 --> 01:26:34,328
♪ Isn't she ♪

1883
01:26:34,328 --> 01:26:38,015
♪ Pretty in pink ♪

1884
01:26:38,015 --> 01:26:40,348
♪ Isn't she ♪

1885
01:26:54,532 --> 01:26:57,652
♪ Caroline talks to you softly sometimes ♪

1886
01:26:57,652 --> 01:27:01,294
♪ She says I love you and too much ♪

1887
01:27:01,294 --> 01:27:06,294
♪ She doesn't have anything
you want to steal ♪

1888
01:27:06,663 --> 01:27:09,908
♪ Well, nothing you can touch ♪

1889
01:27:09,908 --> 01:27:13,910
♪ She waves ♪

1890
01:27:13,910 --> 01:27:16,125
♪ She buttons your shirt ♪

1891
01:27:16,125 --> 01:27:20,462
♪ The traffic is waiting outside,
she hands you this coat ♪

1892
01:27:20,462 --> 01:27:24,861
♪ She gives you her clothes,
these cars collide ♪

1893
01:27:24,861 --> 01:27:28,535
♪ Pretty in pink ♪

1894
01:27:28,535 --> 01:27:32,083
♪ Isn't she ♪

1895
01:27:32,083 --> 01:27:35,960
♪ Pretty in pink ♪

1896
01:27:35,960 --> 01:27:38,293
♪ Isn't she ♪

1897
01:27:53,181 --> 01:27:56,783
♪ All their rags are worn ♪

1898
01:27:56,783 --> 01:28:00,471
♪ And other kinds of uniform ♪

1899
01:28:00,471 --> 01:28:03,614
♪ Kid you're really free ♪

1900
01:28:03,614 --> 01:28:07,770
♪ Like individuality ♪

1901
01:28:07,770 --> 01:28:12,770
♪ You know what you want
to be until tomorrow ♪

1902
01:28:49,633 --> 01:28:52,383
("Forever Young"

1903
01:29:06,573 --> 01:29:11,044
♪ Let's dance in style,
let's dance for a while ♪

1904
01:29:11,044 --> 01:29:15,496
♪ Heaven can wait we're
only watching the skies ♪

1905
01:29:15,496 --> 01:29:19,780
♪ Hoping for the best,
but expecting the worst ♪

1906
01:29:19,780 --> 01:29:24,515
♪ Are you gonna drop the bomb or not ♪

1907
01:29:24,515 --> 01:29:28,989
♪ Let us die young or
let us live forever ♪

1908
01:29:28,989 --> 01:29:33,548
♪ We don't have the power,
but we never say never ♪

1909
01:29:33,548 --> 01:29:38,113
♪ Sitting in a sandpit,
life is a short trip ♪

1910
01:29:38,113 --> 01:29:42,701
♪ The music's for the sad man ♪

1911
01:29:42,701 --> 01:29:47,069
♪ Can you imagine when this race is won ♪

1912
01:29:47,069 --> 01:29:51,738
♪ Turn our golden faces into the sun ♪

1913
01:29:51,738 --> 01:29:55,875
♪ Praising our leaders,
we're getting in tune ♪

1914
01:29:55,875 --> 01:30:00,201
♪ The music's played by the madman ♪

1915
01:30:00,201 --> 01:30:03,078
♪ Forever young ♪

1916
01:30:03,078 --> 01:30:08,078
♪ I want to be forever young ♪

1917
01:30:09,168 --> 01:30:13,735
♪ Do you really want to live forever ♪

1918
01:30:13,735 --> 01:30:18,301
♪ Forever, and ever ♪

1919
01:30:18,301 --> 01:30:21,168
♪ Forever young ♪

1920
01:30:21,168 --> 01:30:26,168
♪ I want to be forever young ♪

1921
01:30:27,543 --> 01:30:32,077
♪ Do you really want to live forever ♪

1922
01:30:32,077 --> 01:30:37,018
♪ Forever, forever young ♪

1923
01:30:37,018 --> 01:30:41,470
♪ Some are like water,
some are like the heat ♪

1924
01:30:41,470 --> 01:30:46,078
♪ Some are a melody
and some are the beat ♪

1925
01:30:46,078 --> 01:30:50,519
♪ Sooner or later they'll all be gone ♪

1926
01:30:50,519 --> 01:30:54,929
♪ Why don't they stay young ♪

1927
01:30:54,929 --> 01:30:59,677
♪ It's hard to get old without a cause ♪

1928
01:30:59,677 --> 01:31:04,190
♪ I don't want to perish
like a fading horse ♪

1929
01:31:04,190 --> 01:31:08,528
♪ Youth's like diamonds
swinging out of the blue ♪

1930
01:31:08,528 --> 01:31:12,706
♪ We let them all come true ♪

1931
01:31:12,706 --> 01:31:15,584
♪ Forever young ♪

1932
01:31:15,584 --> 01:31:20,584
♪ I want to be forever young ♪

1933
01:31:21,747 --> 01:31:26,178
♪ Do you really want to live forever ♪

1934
01:31:26,178 --> 01:31:30,619
♪ Forever, and ever ♪

1935
01:31:30,619 --> 01:31:33,518
♪ Forever young ♪

1936
01:31:33,518 --> 01:31:38,518
♪ I want to be forever young ♪

1937
01:31:39,745 --> 01:31:44,248
♪ Do you really want to live forever ♪

1938
01:31:44,248 --> 01:31:48,860
♪ Forever, and ever ♪

1939
01:31:48,860 --> 01:31:51,901
♪ Forever young ♪

1940
01:31:51,901 --> 01:31:56,901
♪ I want to be forever young ♪

1941
01:31:57,878 --> 01:32:02,529
♪ Do you really want to live forever ♪

1942
01:32:02,529 --> 01:32:07,023
♪ Forever, forever ♪

1943
01:32:07,023 --> 01:32:09,837
♪ Forever young ♪

1944
01:32:09,837 --> 01:32:14,837
♪ I want to be forever young ♪

1945
01:32:16,063 --> 01:32:20,563
♪ Do you really want to live forever ♪