[instrumental music playing]
[gasps]
[singing mogwai song]
[yawning]
[bird screeching]
[all screaming]
[screaming continues]
[grunts]
[screaming]
[gasping]
[thunderclap]
[screams]
[snoring]
[gasps]
[circus assistant] Uh...
I know we've been in these mountains a long time,
but we can all see that, right?
What is that?
-Is that a cat? -A dog?
That is our new star.
[gasps]
[theme music playing]
[instrumental music playing]
-You won again? -So lucky...
[Sam] Ginseng! Seahorses!
Lotus seed!
-One, two, three-- -[Hon] Ah!
But there was one ingredient you missed.
[Hon] A kiss?
Sorry, but even a drop of human saliva would dilute this medicine's effectiveness.
So, just to be safe...
Yes, sir boss. What are we mixing?
Scalp cream. You know how fierce Mr. Shao's dandruff gets.
[Sam] Oh-oh-oh , don't forget Mr. Shao's allergic to licorice root.
[chuckles] Thank you, Sam.
Soon, we really will be working for you.
But until then, sorry.
-[Fong] It's your turn. -Ah.
[sighs]
Here we go. Grandpa?
Uh, it's time for your medicine.
[Sam screams]
-Grandpa? -[Grandpa] Gotcha!
Wait, you can get under the bed?
Under? Yes. Back up without help? No.
[Grandpa] Oh. Wow. You're growing strong.
How many monsters did you slay today, huh?
Same as always. Zero.
That is a fake human skull, right?
Nope. It's from a grave I robbed.
[shivers]
Now what is my daughter poisoning me with today, huh?
Arthritis tea.
I slipped in some goji berries to make it go down smoother.
[Grandpa laughs]
Ugh...
-For surviving grandpa. -Without screaming... much.
You can go ingredient shopping with your father.
Shopping? But it's not every other Tuesday. Ooh, exciting.
If this counts as exciting, we have failed you, my grandson.
By your age, I've already broken out of one jail,
survived two ship wrecks, punched three sharks
-and began my life as a treasure hunter! -[Sam gasps]
Yes, and look around at all the treasure you brought back.
Ten yuan should cover what we need.
You know what, Sam, your work ethic is inspiring me.
Maybe I can contribute more to this family.
I'll go shopping with Sam today.
But Dad always shops with me.
We even have a shopping song.
♪ Shopping, shopping shopping, shopping shopping, shopping ♪
[Grandpa] Oh my Gosh!
♪ Shopping shopping, shopping ♪
Okay. We mostly just say "shopping" a lot.
Daughter, you said yourself you got your hands full, right?
So you mix, while Hon delivers
and the boy and I shop. Triple victory!
Plus, we can go shopping with my old adventures box.
It's seen the world, saved my life and has 88 secret compartments,
including one that houses a... never mind.
The Scorpion died.
[both] Ugh!
Your adventurer's box?
Whoa!
-Still, it's yours now, Sam. -[Sam gasps]
[Grandpa laughs]
Sam, before you leave, promise me, run home
the second grandpa brings up adventure. Or magic. Or knives.
We let him have knives?
-Promise. -I promise.
And pass out some flyers.
Hon, tell me Sam is safe with my dad.
Fong, you told me never to lie to you.
[Sam] Okay. Okay. Wild idea.
If we get ginger and ginko at Miss Lin's,
we have enough time to go to Mr. Fan's for-- Hey!
Eh, I could get all of this for half the price at the South market.
Mom says South Market is filled with thieves and freeloaders.
[Grandpa] She's not wrong, but it's the only way we can have money left over.
Money left over for wha-- Hey! What?
An adventure.
[sighs] I was afraid you'd say that?
Have fun, be safe, I'm gonna run--- Ow! My ear!
Wow. That arthritis tea is working.
[Sam] Grandpa, where are we?
And can I have my money back?
[stuttering] Not until you've learned your lessons.
First lesson,
never leave your coins unguarded.
Second lesson,
you want to be a great doctor like your mom?
More than anything. It's the culmination of my 21 year plan.
Then you need to discover the world's mysteries.
And that won't happen if you never stray beyond your parents' sight.
Right. Which is why I plan to do just that in year thirteen.
[stuttering] Third lesson, life waits for no one, Sam.
Better to act today, especially when today
has a circus.
[circus assistant] Feast your eyes,
amaze your ears and shock your nostrils
with all the wonders from certain parts of the world,
here at the circus of the uncanny!
See? Not all adventures are scary.
Hailing from the deepest regions of the north
and known to live for ten thousand years,
I bring to you, the White Mountain yeti!
[yawning]
Grandpa, that yeti is a monkey.
And that "invisible tiger spirit"
-is just an empty cage. -Probably.
But once in the while, these circuses have something worth the price of admission.
And at my age, I'll take whatever magic I can get.
Sorry, magic is one of Mom's "runaway words,"
so... yeah. Ow!
Eh, magic gets a bad rap.
Only half of it is dark and deadly.
Oh, I know magic isn't bad. Because there's no such thing.
Your parents want you to think that,
but they've never even left Shanghai.
I have traveled the world to meet, and to bravely fight,
all manner of supernatural creatures
and I'll tell you this... magic is all around us.
But you'll never see it if you don't go out and look.
[spits]
Okay, that one might not be magic. [groans in disgust]
Gather round, brave souls.
From the deepest regions up the Yangtze River,
I bring you a creature only whispered about
in myth and legend...
the singing Tianjing cat-dog!
[sighs]
[Sam] Whoa! You're kidding... A cat dog?
It's not magic, but it is cute...
[whimpering]
And sad. Very sad.
[groans]
[exclaiming]
Nah, he's an entertainer!
[singing]
Aha!
[singing]
[all applauding]
Huh? Mm...
[whistles]
[singing]
-[whistling] -[Elle] You rang?
Whatever you brought me here for better be good.
I was about to crash a very fancy wedding
full of very unguarded valuables.
[Gizmo singing]
Huh, that does look like the thing the boss was searching for.
Send word that we found it,
then find that wedding and steal me some cake. Corner piece!
Huh?
[gasps]
[candy vendor] Thief!
[Gizmo continues singing]
[singing]
[groans]
[panting]
[grunts]
Take a bow, cat-dog.
It can't be.
-[candy vendor] That's it? -[man] What just happened?
Who wants to see me eat fire?
-Let's... go. -No. Come, Sam.
If we leave now, Shanghai is doomed.
[grunts]
You ungrateful twerp! If you didn't bring in
-so many gawking idiots... -[mimicking circus master]
-I don't sound like that. -[mimicking circus master]
[yeti laughing]
Exactly as I feared. Sam, that is a mogwai.
So like a type of rodent.
Oh no, mogwai are the rarest mystical creatures.
No mortal has seen one for centuries, and with good reason.
They might look cute, but the last time one of those was left in humanity's care,
cities burned, people died and China was nearly obliterated.
Sam, if you care about your parents or our city or me--
That's literally all I care about!
Then we must take the mogwai.
[circus master] Diva!
-[Elle] Eh, wrong way, big guy. -Hey!
Get lost. We don't do handouts.
I can see you also don't do teeth.
But let's stop the small talk before feelings get hurt.
I want to buy that dancing, whatever you're calling it.
And before you ask a dumb question...
[circus master] Well then, I can absolutely certify
that this tiny beast is 100 percent cat-dog.
[whimpering]
-Oh well, we tried, let's give up-- -Never! I have a plan.
Mom said no knives.
Your mother doesn't understand the fine art of creating a distraction.
My back! [groans]
-[Sam] Grandpa! -Who's there?
Backstage costs extra.
New plan.
Your new plan is a marble?
[grunts]
Hmm?
-[explosion] -[all cheering]
[gasps]
-Hold it! -[Gizmo laughs]
Until I get new money for my old money, that critter's mine!
Funny because he's in my-- Hands! Ow!
[exclaiming]
Huh? [groans]
-Are you okay? -Of course not.
-Now, you need to grab the mogwai. -Me?
I can't do that without you.
You have to do this, Sam.
I know you can.
Hmm...
Got any more of those explodey thingys?
[Grandpa] Go, go, go, go, go! Now!
Get that cat-dog!
Great show, cat-dog! Smile!
Ahh! Bright light! Bright light!
-Who are you? Huh? -[all cheering]
Sorry for what I'm about to do!
[screaming]
Hi! I'm Sam and I'm here to take you!
[Sam] Uh, sorry!
[groans]
Huh? [grunts]
[Grandpa] Sam! Get the mogwai!
[thrilling instrumental music playing]
[groans]
-[groans] -[gasps]
[screaming]
[groans]
Sam!
Oh...
[grunts]
[whimpers]
We won't hurt you, Mr. Mogwai.
-Mogwai? -That's right.
We know what you are and we want to help.
[singing]
Eh?
[exhales]
[sniffs]
Don't worry, you're safe now, Mr. Mogwai.
Can I call you Mr. Mogwai?
-Mm-hmm. -Do you have a first name?
-Gizmo. -Gitchmoe?
-Gizmo. -Gizno? Geezmo?
-Giz...mo. -Gizmo?
-Mm-hmm. -Okay. Gizmo.
Hi Gizmo. I'm Sam.
[Grandpa grunts]
Um, Grandpa. What are you doing?
-Packing. We must leave at once. -To go where?
We just got back home.
And we never did our shopping.
No. Shopping is pointless.
Everything is pointless next to this mogwai.
[Grandpa] His species is wildly dangerous?
Oh, admit it. You are.
I know how your kind turned Fengdong
from a thriving metropolis to a decimated ghost city.
So we must return him to his home,
the Valley of Jade.
Wait... The valley of Jade? That made-up place from all your old stories?
Grandpa, is this all just an excuse to drag me on an adventure?
No. This and the Valley of Jade are very real.
Now, pack up for our long, possibly deadly journey.
Did you say possibly deadly?
How dangerous can he be?
[screaming in pain]
-[Grandpa] No, no, no, no, no, no. -[Fong] Sam!
I told you to run if Grandpa got into trouble!
-[Fong] Cat! -Dog!
[screaming]
[gasping]
[whimpering]
Listen carefully now. The mogwai also come with rules.
Rule number one, never, ever, ever get them wet
[gasps]
Oh no! Okay.
[deep breath]
Your filthy associate said you found me a mogwai.
I did, but then, I can explain.
[Greene] Well, actually "explain" would be to offer me greater clarity.
What you're about to give me is an "excuse,"
which is an attempt to lessen your personal blame.
I have zero interest in excuses.
Any interest in finding the guys who grabbed your mogwai?
[intense music playing]
[theme music playing]