Previously on "Holey Moley"...
Well, hello, Miss Piggy.
I need your help to save my TV show.
You need a licensed therapist, sweetie.
[ Laughs ] Good one.
How are you doing with Miss Piggy?
I-I -- You know, I don't know.
Miss Piggy's silence...
Oh, hi, Rob.
...sent Rob back to Kermit.
I could really use some more ideas,
you know, to help me save the show.
You say that you've got an idea
that's not just throwing your boomerang fish?
I'm throwing Darcy and you.
Wha--
[ Muffled scream ]
But Kermit soon realized...
You're absolutely right. Joe Tessitore is the problem.
...some calls... But, Rob, he's such a nice guy.
[ Chuckles ] Replace Joe.
...should always go to voicemail.
I'm sorry, who is Joe?
♪♪
Tessitore: In the future,
when the sun scorches the Earth
and the winds become so strong,
we'll be forced to seek shelter underground,
the only stories we'll have left
will be the ones that started here tonight.
♪♪
The death-defying stunts...
jaw-dropping displays of brains...
brawn...
unforgettable moments destined to become legendary.
♪♪
[ Crowd gasps ]
Not to mention the greatest story ever told,
about a boy from Kansas
that worked hard towards his dreams that one day came true --
to tell color commentary on a network mini golf show...
with his best friend.
That boy's name was Rob Riggle,
and that best friend was you, Joe.
That's really sweet of you, Rob, really, really sweet.
Yeah. It is sweet, Joe.
[ Laughs ] Is there, uh...
...anything you'd like to say, perhaps?
Hi, everybody. I'm Joe Tessitore.
And I'm Joe's best friend, Rob Riggle.
This is...
"Holey Moley"! "Holey Moley"!
"Fore-ever"!
♪♪
Did you hear that, Rob? I must have a song stuck in my head,
because tonight, the course is alive with music,
as our eight mini golfers competing
are all seasoned musicians.
Plus, later tonight, for the first time ever,
we will have Kermit the Frog up in the booth
to call some of the action. I'm excited, Joe.
I'm not gonna even try to hide my excitement.
Alright, tonight, Round 1, eight golfers face off.
The winners are going to compete in a sudden-death Round 2.
Only the best get to that third round,
where they're going to play for a spot in the final episode,
where one of our champions is going to make a putt
worth a quarter million dollars.
[ Crowd cheering ]
Ooh, whoo! Here they come, Joe!
Our special night of music begins right here on Polecano.
With mind-blowing technological advancements,
it's totally different from Season 2.
Just kidding -- It's exactly the same.
That's how little creativity we have left.
But you never get sick of seeing this.
[ Crowd groaning, exclaiming ]
Wipe out!
Oh! Oh!
[ Laughs ]
Nick: Let's go!
Hey, here's our first matchup,
40-year-old Michael Towns -- he's from Pasadena --
up against 29-year-old Nick Hanulik from Studio City.
My name is Michael Towns, also known as Music Man Mike.
And I make educational music videos for children.
I'm all about the music.
I have over 30 instruments.
When I'm not in the recording studio,
I'm on the green.
[ Rapping ] ♪ Be quiet, you'll distract the golfer ♪
♪ Who's the best player on the miniature golf course? ♪
♪ Golf hat, golf shirt, putter, and golf shorts ♪
♪ If I hit the ball towards the crowd, I'm-a yell "Fore!" ♪
I'm here to prove that I am the best mini golfer in the world.
Hi, my name's Nick Hanulik.
By day, I'm an EMT.
I take care of people. I respond to your emergencies.
But by night, I like to share the joy of music with the world.
Whoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo!
People would describe me
as spontaneous, musical...
♪ Na-na-na-na-na-na, na-na-na ♪
...a goat.
[ Bleating ]
[ Laughs ]
As an EMT, I've been put in some stressful situations,
and I'm hoping, out on the course,
that I'm able to stay cool and putt the ball into the hole.
Let's go, "Holey Moley"!
[ Rapping ] ♪ Unh, unh, say hi ♪ [ Beatboxing ]
♪ To Steph, Rob, Joe, and Jeannie Mai ♪
♪ "Holey Moley" is the best, I watch it all the time ♪
♪ Can't wait to putt the plank and not take a dive ♪
♪ "Holey Moley" is the best, I watch it all the time ♪
Yeah, you do! Hey, alright! [ Cheers and applause ]
Well done, well done.
Almost as good as some of my raps.
I would love to hear your rapping, Rob.
Would you like me to beatbox for you?
[ Panting ]
[ Breathing rapidly ]
Are you okay? Stretch, you want to check on him
over here, Stretch? [ Coughs ]
Wow, I got dizzy. I just got super dizzy.
Oxygen, please. Thank you.
Go ahead. That is Nick Hanulik right there, Rob.
He's 29 years old. He's from Studio City.
What Nick's aiming for here is the channel at the top,
and that'll take his ball to the tiki
and the best possible position on the green.
Nick Hanulik up and --
Oh, he's going to grab that channel right into tiki!
That is the best possible position
you can have on the green.
Riggle: It's tiki time.
Nick Hanulik is sitting pretty here at Polecano.
[ Evil cackling ]
Oh, look at this. Look at this.
Ohh.
Oh. Oh.
Oh, that's a beautiful putt!
What a tee shot from Nick Hanulik.
He is in the sweet spot to try to win.
Goat! Goat! Goat!
He also calls himself "The Goat."
Did you see his T-shirt? It said, "I'm the goat."
Not "Greatest Of All Time." Just, like, the the actual goat.
Calls himself Goat.
[ Bleating ]
Oh, he just did a goat cry.
There he is.
Wow! Oh!
That was perfect!
Got to hold on!
Just sticks to it.
Wow!
Michael Towns.
He goes by the nickname of Music Man Mike.
Oh, he may get this channel.
Is he going to get this channel?
He did it!
You got to be kidding me.
Let's go!
We have two tikis here.
Whoo!
Michael Towns!
Now, that's something we haven't seen.
Two for two.
Two out of two!
Come on!
Exceptional tee shots on Polecano.
Off the ramp, out of the tiki,
and settles in pin high.
He's got a straight, 2-foot putt.
This is potential putt-off material.
Yes, it is.
He's pointing at us. He's pointing at us, Joe.
Right back at ya, Music Man.
He's not pointing at us.
Pointing at me.
♪♪
Wow! Eye of the tiger!
The Music Man needs to get this
to stay alive.
[ Crowd screaming ]
Maybe!
He did it!
I don't believe it! Wow!
Just amazing!
Slide down, sir.
[ Crowd cheering ]
There you go.
Come on!
Let's go!
How about this?
We have to create a bigger, badder Polecano,
which I think involves higher stakes.
What do we need? Let's get -- Alligators, sharks.
Oh, alligators is a nice touch. Some sort of live,
dangerous animal in the water. In the water, yeah.
The pole needs to have maybe some barbed wire on it.
Oh, that's a nice touch.
The zip line should be on fire.
I think the thing they're holding,
if they hold on too long, shocks them.
You've been thinking about this for a while.
Well -- I mean, barbed wire?
Nobody just comes up with barbed wire right off the bat.
Well, I mean, listen.
Electric shock?
I do think about it a lot.
I care, you know? I care. What can I say?
If I'm guilty of a lot of things,
it's caring too much.
Our musicians have made it onto the green.
Nick Hanulik is away.
This for a 2, and we could be headed for a putt-off.
[ Gasps ] That was so costly.
He pulled it, Joe. That's gonna cost the goat.
So, that's a 3.
And a quarter-million-dollar opportunity
may have just slipped through the hands of Nick Hanulik.
Michael Towns.
He could be working his way
to the second round of "Holey Moley"
if he makes this putt right here.
And he does!
Michael Towns is off to round number 2.
Music Man Mike is into the second round,
and we will see him there.
Our next hole is a fan favorite. It's Hole Number Two.
Let's hope our next two musicians don't stink.
Here they come, Joe.
It is Allie Chipkin,
a 29-year-old folk singer from upstate New York
up against 26-year-old Kiara Harris from Tampa.
Whoo! Let's go!
Hi, everyone. I'm Allie Chipkin.
I'm 29 years old, and I write custom wedding songs.
If you're a couple getting married, and you're looking
for that perfect song for your wedding day,
I create it for you.
♪ "Holey Moley" ♪
♪ I can't get enough ♪
I'm a little nervous to be on "Holey Moley,"
I'm not gonna lie.
Falling in the water doesn't sound fun.
That kind of freaks me out.
But I love miniature golf,
and I'm going to win this thing.
Yeah! Whoo-hoo!
Hi, my name is Kiara Harris.
I'm 26 years old, and I'm known as The Singer with Swing.
Ever since I could walk and grab a mic, I've been singing.
♪ I just got a spot on "Holey Moley" ♪
♪ Am I gonna win? Like, oh, yeah, totally ♪
I grew up on a golf course,
so I got to play golf pretty much every day.
Whoo!
My friends would describe me as dramatic and a diva.
Whoo!
They're not wrong.
I'm gonna kick your what-what-what,
'cause I got a mean little putt-putt-putt.
I have the pizzazz and the sass to win "Holey Moley."
Gonna show you just how it's done
when I sink this hole in one!
[ Cheers and applause ]
Kiara Harris.
She has to hit her ball down that narrow 50-foot ledge
right in front of the porta potties
to get to the green.
It goes into the water! Oh!
She'll be from the drop zone.
She's hoping not to drop off the course
here at Hole Number Two
into the substance below.
She's been golfing for 16 years.
How long has she been running by porta potties
at top speed? Uh, I would assume
this will be the first go of it.
Okay, alright, just asking.
Whoo! She'll have 2 1/2 seconds
to make a run for it before the occupants finish their business.
If she gets slammed by a door, it's a stroke penalty.
[ Buzzer ]
Oh, here's -- No chance. Oh, no! Gotta go!
Gotta go! Gotta go! Oh, and she spun around.
Hole Number Two claims another victim.
No mercy from Number Two. No.
Number Two put the stank on it.
Number Two getting the best of Kiara Harris.
Kiara got spun all the way around.
Spun around and sent.
I'm always impressed with when they emerge from the water.
It's right...there.
Look at that face.
That's where the reality is.
Allie's tee shot now.
Business owner/folk singer.
I'm kind of an announcer folk singer.
You're an announcer fo-- You enjoy --
I dabble. I dabble.
Kind of like a James Taylor sort of vibe?
Vibe-ish, yeah. But, you know, it's a little more yodeling,
but it's -- it's folksy.
Yodeling? Yeah, a little bit.
Allie's tee shot.
Oh, oh, oh, hang in there!
Oh, this is gonna work for her.
Oh! Oh, cheated...
That was unfortunate.
...by the camera bay.
Alright.
Oh, crap, let's go!
[ Laughs ]
Allie Chipkin better hit the afterburners,
or she's gonna get dumped in a bucket of sludge.
Can she survive?
She's got to explode.
[ Buzzer ] Explode!
Got to get going, got to get going,
got to get -- Oh, gosh!
She caught an edge.
Oh! She was probably thinking on the way down,
"What the folk?" ...music.
This is not right.
She's emerged from this water,
saying, "I think I made a mistake."
"I think I made a big judgment error."
"I signed up for the wrong show."
Yeah, "I signed up for the wrong show." That's nasty.
Don't go anywhere.
Find out who wins Hole Number Two when we come back.
Tessitore: Welcome back to "Holey Moley's" night of music,
where Round 1 action continues. Now, while you were away,
the Southern girl with the big voice, Kiara Harris,
came out swinging from the drop zone... Riggle: Oh!
...but had a bit too much pepper in the gumbo.
Folk singer Allie Chipkin took on the ridge...
Aw! ...and ran well past the cup.
On her next shot, the swinging singer missed her mark.
Oh -- Oh, no!
Finally, Allie Chipkin brought it home.
That was awesome!
Folk singer Allie Chipkin,
she's off to Round 2 here on "Holey Moley."
This next hole is a real head-banger.
It's The Pecker.
[ Crowd cheering ]
Tyler Kairey and Okky Masgono meeting up
in Round 1 action on The Pecker.
Hi, everyone. My name is Okky Masgono
from Semarang, Indonesia.
Everyone calls me Okky Dokey.
I'm the world's "dokiest" player --
the dopest, coolest, and sexiest.
I play the drums. I had a band called Savior Savior.
We used to play when we were in college.
We had long hair, emo songs.
That's why they call me The Golfer with a Beat.
Music and golf are my passions.
That's the thing that I love the most.
Yes! Okky Dokey, Dokey!
I beat the drums,
and I beat people at the mini golf course.
Hi, my name is Tyler Kairey. I'm 27 years old,
and I am a toolmaker from Bloomington, Indiana.
I've played golf since I was 4 years old.
It's a passion, and I can spend hours on the putting green.
Yes! I even have a putting green in my office.
Oh, yeah, you can just practice your putting
while you're taking calls.
[ Saxophone playing ]
When I'm not putting, I'm playing my jams.
Some people call me The Sax Man of Mini Golf.
Being the Sax Man has translated great to my golf game.
My strategy is to really focus, control my breathing,
and I'm not gonna miss.
Whoo! That's what I'm talking about!
Wow, that's a big pecker.
Biggest pecker I've ever seen.
Tyler Kairey.
He started playing mini golf when he was 4 years old.
He says, "I make tools.
I'm not a tool."
That's a good reminder.
That's just good self-care, I think.
Tyler Kairey trying to catch that channel on the left.
Instead, it goes to the right.
Ooh.
♪♪
As we've seen, though, anything is possible, Joe.
Comes down to that last piece of wood here on The Pecker.
Can he get a little kiss?
There we go. He got it.
Come on, baby. Come on, baby! He got it. He got it!
It's in! He got it!
Oh, no! How did it stay out?!
[ Chuckling ] No! Oh, my God!
Going -- I thought that was dead to rights.
Oh, how does that not go in?
Tyler Kairey. Wow!
That's the best shot we've ever seen on The Pecker.
Hot pecker action tonight.
So now Tyler Kairey has to conquer the pecker head.
How did I get myself into this?
[ Laughs ]
The bobbing pecker
has a red-plumed feather in the back of his head.
The object is to get it.
If you don't, it's a stroke penalty.
Has he got it? Can he get it?
But he's not gonna stay long.
Oh! The dip got him.
[ Cheers and applause ]
Joe, what I think is when the nose goes down...
Mm-hmm? ...you land...
Yep. ...and as it comes back up,
you got to boogie, and that's when you got to make your dive.
I don't think there's any riding the pecker.
See, now, right here. So right there, he's got to go?
Yeah, got to go. Got to go, got to go.
Even now, he's still got time at the apex,
but when this starts back down,
there's nothing you're going to do.
Okky Masgono loves the game
and is a certified PGA golf instructor.
His tee shot.
Keep in mind, Tyler Kairey is sitting pretty on the green.
Oh!
There's a lot coming here.
This ball has a lot of momentum.
Oh, and that's --
No. Ah.
Got that big kick.
Got the big kick to the right.
[ Cheers and applause ]
You look at his position on the green.
Tyler's got an easy cleanup here.
If he can get the feather, it could even things up.
He's got to get the feather. That's the only chance he's got.
♪♪
Here's Okky giving it a shot.
Good run-up.
Good leap!
Okky, Okky!
Yes, yes! He's got it!
Okky Dokey...
He's got it! ...how do you do?!
Alright!
Yeah! That was amazing.
What he did to conquer this obstacle
is exactly what we said needed to be done.
As impressive a performance on The Pecker as you will see.
Well-executed, Okky.
My man Okky!
Once again -- And I've said this before --
you're the best network TV analyst in all of mini golf.
You are, you are. Well, Joe, I --
You said it. You saw the strategy right away.
Ah, you're too kind.
And that means a lot coming from you, Joe.
Let's hope the --
the Emmy voters notice.
♪♪
Okky sits 1 because he was able
to get the plume out of the pecker's head.
Tyler sits 2 because he incurred the stroke penalty.
Is he going to play the ramp? [ Gasps ]
Wow.
It's a risky play.
Very hard to control the speed coming off the ramp.
Let's see if this gamble pays off.
Up, over, around.
But that is the problem.
Ohh.
Can't control that speed.
So now Okky is still away,
and he's going to be putting for a 3.
[ Crowd exclaiming ]
Misses it.
Tyler Kairey's going to be putting for the win.
Trying to get to round number 2.
And Tyler does so. He conquers The Pecker.
Let's go!
Tyler Kairey, the 27-year-old from Bloomington, Indiana,
is off to round number 2 on "Holey Moley."
And now more "Auditions to Replace Joe"
with Bobo the Bear.
Uh, could we all just please keep this thing moving along?
I mean, we haven't even come close
to finding anybody that could fill Joe's shoes.
Kermit: Okay, Bobo, are you ready?
Uh, yes, sir.
Just take it from the top, there.
You've got the first line. Oh. Yes.
Uh, I'm playing Joe?
Yeah.
Hey, everybody.
I'm Joe Tess--
Tessi-- "Tessy-tory"?
Ah, that's close enough. And I am Rob Riggle,
and yes, this is literally a mini golf competition
on prime-time with an absurd budget.
Wow! That's -- That's great.
Because...
the -- the wor-- the world --
The world needs more mini golf.
And ABC said why not?
Ooh! Uh, th-- This is extreme mini golf.
And cut!
That felt good. That felt really good.
Tessitore: We welcome you back to the all-singing,
all-dancing "Holey Moley."
Our night of music continues here on The Distractor.
Riggle: Here we go!
We've got musicians Emily Kraudel
and Beth Farnsworth are going to go head-to-head
here on The Distractor.
Hi, you guys. I'm Emily Kraudel,
and I am the lobster of "Holey Moley,"
because a lobster means that you break out of your shell.
I do music, and I'm an artist, and I freestyle-rap.
[ Rapping ] ♪ I'm Emily the lobster, I won't even flinch ♪
♪ The title I'll clinch 'cause I'm good in a pinch ♪
I'm so excited to just break out of my shell.
But I'm 100% focused when it comes to playing mini golf.
What?!
Yes!
Stay tuned, America.
[ Clicking ]
Are you ready to rock 'n' roll?
Hi, "Holey Moley." My name is Beth Farnsworth.
I'm 52, and I'm the '80s rock glam queen.
I sang for a rock band in the '80s.
♪ "Ho-Ho-Holey Moley" ♪
I have been mini golfing for as long as I can remember.
I'm obsessed with golf.
I could play every day if I could.
I'm just really good at putting.
Bam!
I'm here to prove to my three daughters
that this 52-year-old woman can win "Holey Moley."
Here we go, here we go.
31-year-old rapper Emily.
She'll now face the distraction.
What is it? What is it? What is it? What is it?
It could be anything.
What is it? And the distraction is...
[ Chuckles ] What is it?
Two guys holding... jump ropes?
Are they holding snakes?
They got rattlesnakes!
[ Whips cracking ]
Oh, whips!
Whips?
Whips!
Whoa! [ Laughs ]
This just got kinky!
Nice!
Oh, these are the world championship-level
whip crackers, Rob. [ Whips continue cracking ]
Listen to that snap.
Like a gunshot almost.
Is there any chance -- and I'm just putting it out there --
that the whip could catch someone in the neck
and chop their head off?
Uh, remote.
But possible?
Everything's possible.
Oh!
Emily Kraudel, musician, artist, freestyle rapper.
She may drop one here in a moment.
Like it's hot?
Right now, she just has to focus in on a 12-foot putt
as whips are snapping around her.
♪♪
Emily...
Yes! It drops.
Oh, my gosh!
Emily Kraudel.
It drops for her.
Oh, what -- what's going on?
You can't do that kind of razzle-dazzle here, young lady.
[ Rapping ] ♪ I'm the lobster, I come with fire ♪
♪ All you other players should just retire ♪
Oh! We gon' break battle, break battle.
Now Beth has to have this 12-footer.
Look, she has on pink gloves that are --
with the fingers cut out, almost like a weightlifter.
Beth was the singer in an '80s rock band.
She has recorded two albums, Rob.
'80s -- great music.
Joe, what does this guy -- He's got one big whip?
That's a giant whip on a stick.
Oh! I mean, look at the length and the girth of that whip.
[ Whips continue cracking ]
♪♪
Must go.
And it does not.
Aah!
So Emily wins it.
Yeah!
What's she doing?
Wow!
Oh, break dancing!
I am the lobster! [ Laughs ]
Rapper Emily Kraudel takes the last spot
in Round 2 on "Holey Moley."
And now even more "Auditions to Replace Joe"
with Joe from Legal.
Kermit: Okay, rolling.
You know, if I nail this thing, they won't even
have to change the name on the door.
And I hope the outfit's okay.
Although I always do look good in a law suit.
[ Snickers ] Lawsuit.
Ohh, that's rich.
Okay, whenever you're ready, Joe.
Uh, me, Joe, or the character Joe?
Because we already have the same name.
So are you addressing me, Joe, or character Joe?
Yes, I was speaking to you, Joe.
Good. This is all very exciting.
I've never auditioned for anything before.
I mean, lawyers are naturally funny,
but I don't really get to exercise that muscle much
in the courtroom.
Judges don't find it appealing.
Except in appeals court.
[ Laughs ]
Okay. Yeah. Uh, Joe, Joe!
You see, this character is actually, in a sense,
the straight man of the hosts, so...
Oh.
Case dismissed.
[ Laughs ]
Cut! I won't do it. Joe's irreplaceable.
Hmm. Joe Tessitore's definitely the driving force around here.
Yeah, but clearly, Riggle helps run the show, too.
He does? Yeah.
Into the ground!
[ Both laugh ]
Eh, that's an old joke.
I got an older one. What's that?
Rob Riggle!
[ Both laughing ]
Oh, man.
Tessitore: Welcome back to our "Holey Moley" night of music.
Well, as you know, we're thrilled
that the Muppets are now part of the "Holey Moley" experience.
And for the first time ever, look who's with us.
Kermit the Frog! I never saw this coming.
What a shock to have Kermit the Frog with us.
Nobody told me we'd have a three-man booth, Kermit.
I'm thrilled -- Yeah, nobody told me, either.
I kind of got roped into it,
but I am happy to be here with you, Joe.
Thank you, Kermit. What a thrill it is, the two of us --
And me. Right? Yeah, you're also here, Rob.
He is. Yeah, the three of us.
Yeah, yeah. He is. Doing it.
I can't believe he's here. It's -- I mean, got Kermit --
We got Kermit in the booth, Joe!
Kermit, you been prepping for your big moment in the booth
as now a booth analyst?
No, not really, no.
No, I'm just going to jump right in.
Hey, you know what? That's how I do it.
I just -- I don't even prep anything.
I just show up and start running my mouth.
Joe does all the work. Yeah, that's what Joe said.
Huh? Huh?
Allie: Let's go. Hey, we're set
for a Round 2 sudden-death playoff
here on Full Mooney...
-Whoo! -Yeah, whoo!
...between 29-year-old folk singer Allie Chipkin
up against music producer Michael Towns.
Music Man Mike.
Kermit, you got a nickname?
You know, Miss Piggy just calls me, uh, "Frog."
Right. Sometimes.
Yeah. How about -- How about Green Machine?
Yeah, I like that one.
Yeah. Lean Mean Green Machine.
I'd like to see that in the lower third.
We'll have -- Let's get that --
Chyron? On it? Please?
Okay.
The Lean Mean Green Machine right here.
Mm.
Alright, Michael is up first for his tee shot.
Over the moon, Michael. Let's go.
So, Mike is 40 years old.
Kermit, he raps, beatbox,
can play the sax, the keyboard, the guitar, can sing.
He's the Music Man.
You're a bit of a singer yourself, aren't you, Kermit?
Every once in a while, I've been known to croak out a tune.
[ Laughs ] I like that. Ah. Get it?
I got it. I don't think Joe did.
♪♪
Tee shot has to go over the ramp,
over the water, onto the green.
♪♪
Oh! See if that hits the back ramp.
Got a lot of action! It does and settles in.
Nice shot.
Very nice shot. Wow!
That's a really -- That's a good one.
Very nice. He's gonna be happy with that one.
Whoo!
Alright, now comes the real challenge for Michael Towns,
as he has to somehow... Alright!
...survive the rotating moon across the water.
If he goes into the water, it's a stroke penalty.
Have you ever mooned anybody, Kermit?
Well, I-I'm -- I usually work naked, so I suppose yes.
You're constantly mooning people, then, huh?
U-Unintentionally, but sure.
[ Beep ] Man: We're standing by.
Watch this, Kermit, you're gonna love this.
Kermit: Okay. 3, 2, 1, zero.
Michael trying to keep his balance.
Uh-oh. Oh, no. Oh, he's gone!
We have splashdown.
Oh, here's the replay. Oh, here it is, Kermit.
He got behind, and he couldn't catch up.
That's right. You know, that is one small step for man,
one giant splash for mankind.
Allie Chipkin is next, Kermit, her tee shot here.
Allie "Chippy" Chipkin.
Is that her nickname? That's her nickname.
Chippy? Chippy. Not as good as your nickname,
but that's her nickname. No, no, mine is pretty good.
Yours is great. Green Machine, Green Machine.
[ All chanting "Green Machine" ]
Okay. I love it.
So good. That's so fun.
It's pretty good. It's really good.
Great nickname.
How do you think Piggy would like it?
She will not like it. She won't like it at all?
No.
Allie: Alright.
Allie's tee shot.
To infinity and beyond!
Ooh! Get there!
Ooh, look at this. Look at this kick this thing took.
Hey, look at that! That went in the sand.
That came off the backstop hot, Joe.
Real hot off the backstop,
and then it went all the way back to the sand.
Whoo!
Let's go! Size up Allie for me
in terms of her chances on this obstacle, Kermit.
Well, you know, as we frog golfers say,
it's not that easy making it to the green.
[ Rim shot ] [ Chuckles ]
Oh, that's a good one.
Yeah, thank you. [ Groans ]
Who run the w-- Man: We're standing by.
3, 2, 1.
I give this three seconds. Zero.
Here she goes. Here goes Allie. Kermit: She's going to -- Oh, there she goes.
She's behind it. She's behind.
Yeah. We have splashdown.
Have you guys considered filling the water with alligators,
like we do back home in the swamp?
I pitch it all the time, Kermit. Yeah.
They're not doing it? No, they're not doing it.
I say piranhas,
sharks, alligators, anything from a swamp.
Well, yeah, I mean, if you put alligators in there,
then a hole in one takes on a totally different meaning.
Boy, does it. Yes. You get it.
Whoo! I'm drying off. I don't know about you. That felt good.
Our musicians have made the lunar-themed green.
They both lie 2. To my ball? Alright, sick.
Alright, you got this, Allie. Allie Chipkin is away.
Oh, I'm playing?
Now, Kermit, have you ever mini golfed?
Well, everything I do is mini. That's true.
I'm very short. I didn't even think about that, yeah.
This should be an easy shot. This is you.
Alright. Tessitore: This is out of
the sand here for Allie Chipkin.
Allie: Alright. This is a very tough lie, Riggle.
And is that sand, or is that actual moon dust?
I mean, what kind of budget did this show have?
YOLO. Here we go.
Out of the sand is always tough.
And she -- Oh, look at this! Wow!
Great putt. Okay!
Wow. Nearly -- You're nearly there.
Michael: This is what we've been waiting for.
Michael Towns for the win
to try to get to the final pairing tonight,
play for The Golden Putter and the famed plaid jacket.
Here is Towns for the win.
♪♪
And he puts it in! Oh! There it is.
Michael Towns! Oh, that just sent Allie Chipkin
to her knees! She's devastated!
Kermit: Yeah. Oh!
How about that Michael Towns?
Kermit, a guy who wasn't golfing until three years ago
Wow. is now playing in the final round.
Michael Towns will play in tonight's final round
for The Golden Putter and the plaid jacket.
That was a big showing there, wasn't it?
Yeah, that was really well done.
Well done, Michael.
Allie: Dang.
Yeah, he is very happy.
But don't gloat too much.
Kermit, by the way, no gold jacket,
no vintage gold jacket for you?
Oh, well, I think it would clash with my -- with the green.
Yeah, I could see that.
Don't go anywhere. The music continues right after this.
Tessitore: Welcome back to "Holey Moley's" night of music.
Kermit's left the booth,
and it's time for our final Round 2 battle here.
And it's coming on one of my favorite holes in Season 4,
Holeywood.
Here we go, the Lobster of Mini Golf
against the Sax Man.
Riggle: Looks like Tyler's gonna go first.
The sax player. He's from Bloomington, Indiana.
Tyler has to run down the red-carpet conveyor belt
and leap for the stars.
Where he lands will determine his tee position.
♪♪
Here goes Tyler
down the red carpet.
Oh! Oh!
What was that?! That's a split!
Ohh. Look at this.
♪♪
Oh!
That's the danger zone.
Ohh.
It looks like he tore his hamstring
and also wrecked his, uh...
Ohh!
Future. His future.
That's the best way to put it.
He's gonna feel that in a big way tomorrow.
Aah. Probably right now.
He went into the water,
so now he'll be teeing off from the Rob Riggle drop zone.
That's the worst possible ball position to tee off from.
[ Sighs ] Hate this. What's hard to understand with that?
Hate this game. It's very, very simple.
Yes!
Next up is Emily.
Emily's very excited,
and I think it's probably nervous energy,
'cause she knows she's about to hit the accelerator
and be launched about 20 miles per hour
onto little, tiny Hollywood stars.
Okay.
Uh-oh! Oh, here she goes.
Here she goes. Here she goes. Emily --
Aah!
Ooh! Is she okay?
She went face-first into the side. Ooh. Aah.
Well, she came up smiling, though, Joe.
Yeah, she's been smiling the whole time.
Take me through the replay.
Kind of did a pencil dive right between the lily pads.
And her face is indented onto the second star panel.
Both of our competitors went in the water,
so they'll both be teeing off from the furthest
and the most difficult tee position,
the Riggle drop zone. Very prestigious.
In what way would it be prestigious?
I mean, the connection's obvious.
It's on a pedestal.
♪♪
We will start off with Tyler.
Tyler's got a real James Bond vibe going right here.
Very stylish.
27-year-old from Bloomington, Indiana.
♪♪
Tyler: Come on. Come on.
Off of the ramp.
That's a good putt! Alright.
Runs past.
Tyler Kairey came up big.
And now Emily steps up with her tee shot.
Her motto is, "May you be as beautiful as a sunset
and as strong as a hurricane."
That's been my motto for -- for years.
♪♪
From the drop zone.
Let's see if this comes off the bumper.
This is good. She's got a shot at that.
Good. Oh!
That is a good putt
right there by Emily Kraudel!
That was not bad.
Ooh, they're both lying 1, Joe.
Tyler Kairey on the red carpet island green at Holeywood.
For the win and a trip to the final round.
Look at that!
Well, it's a good putt for a 2.
That's what I'm talking about! You saw that!
That's a good putt!
Never a doubt.
And now Emily has to make to force a putt-off
or else Tyler will advance to the final round
and play for a quarter mil.
♪♪
And Emily able to make her putt.
We have a putt-off. Hey, hey, hey!
Oh, what's going on here?
Break-dance, break-dance!
She's electric boogaloo.
That was so crazy.
♪♪
First putt of the putt-off for Tyler.
♪♪
Boo-yah! Right there!
Perfect roll.
Sax Man Tyler finding his groove
here on Holeywood.
One and done. One and done.
He says, "One and done."
We will find out if that is the case.
Emily has to lock in now.
Good luck.
Emily has to sink this to stay alive.
If she misses, Tyler is through to the next round.
♪♪
Oh! And she lips it.
No!
Emily is devastated.
No!
Come on, baby!
So Tyler Kairey is headed
to the final pairing tonight.
He will play
for the plaid jacket and The Golden Putter.
That's a winner, baby.
Oh! And now he salutes himself.
You don't see that very often.
Hey, don't go anywhere. The beat goes on.
The final round is next.
Tessitore: Welcome back to the final round
of "Holey Moley's" all-singing, all-dancing night of music.
Tonight's winner takes home the plaid jacket, The Golden Putter,
and, most importantly, will grab a spot in the season finale
with a chance to putt for a quarter million dollars.
"Sax Man" Tyler Kairey and Music Man Mike
are going to battle here on Big Foot Wedge.
Let's check in with Jeannie down on the course.
Thanks, Joe. Now, hopefully, our golfers find their footing
on this next hole.
It's Big Foot Wedge.
Golfers start by teeing off
down the long, curved pathway to the green.
Then they've got to hop on a giant, swinging, big foot
and ride it over to the massive golf ball.
If they fall off at any point,
it'll dock them a penalty stroke.
So careful, golfers. Don't get booted!
Thanks, Jeannie.
This is one of the tougher obstacles
we have at "Holey Moley."
The better shot at the hole in one
is if you don't get that bumper at the end of the ramp.
Can you give me a shot of what the bumper is?
Ah. I thought it was an extremely long Sasquatch turd.
What do you think it -- Look at it.
♪♪
That looks like a long Sasquatch poo.
Tyler Kairey makes tools,
lives in Bloomington, Indiana.
He's 27.
He's been mini golfing since he was 4.
♪♪
Here it comes down the ramp.
Tyler: Come on. Give me a break.
Give me a lucky bounce. Give me something good.
The bank at the end of this tee shot
can be really advantageous
if you catch it right. Oh!
Off the side wall, and it bounces back.
That's a great shot, just a great, great shot.
♪♪
Tyler Kairey now is on Bigfoot's foot.
Now, what's funny here is, you look quickly,
and it's as if he's been shrunk.
That's a good point. Have we all been shrunk or just Tyler?
♪♪
Oh. From the foot to the golf ball.
Tyler, oh, he overshot it! Oh, too much!
Little long, little long.
I liked how he launched.
Yes. The launch point was perfect.
Had a little too much gas on it,
little too much pepper in the gumbo.
Pepper in that gumbo.
Oh, hey! It's my uncle!
Uh-oh! It looks like he's shaking hands with, uh, Bigfoot.
Do you see? Do you see, with the hat? I see the mannequin
with the plaid jacket. Get a picture, get a picture.
I see The Golden Putter, but there is no Bigfoot.
He just disappeared.
Rob, you're having Bigfoot sightings
on the "Holey Moley" course now? Really?
[ Creature growling ]
[ Crowd chanting "Michael!" ]
Well, Michael's playing off the crowd.
Oh, yeah. Music Man Mike.
Yeah. Rap, beatbox,
plays the sax, keyboard, guitar, sings.
He is Music Man Mike, and the music to his ears
was a Round 2 victory on Full Mooney.
How will he do here on Big Foot Wedge?
♪♪
Can he stay away from that bumper stick
at the end of the ramp
and get onto the green?
See if he gets past the bumper.
He does. Now the ramp.
Will this come back towards the hole?
No, it actually turns the opposite direction.
Not a good lie. He's gonna need relief.
That requires a big foot wedge. Yeah.
Huh? The big foot wedge.
Yeah.
[ Crowd chanting "Ride the foot!" ]
♪♪
Right there!
[ Growls ] What's wrong?
I thought I saw something.
[ Dramatic music plays ]
Oh, here we go!
Michael from the foot.
Oh, that wasn't even close!
What happened? How do you miss the entire golf ball?
I don't know. You have to try, I think,
to miss the whole thing.
See how he's dug in between the middle toe and the second toe?
And that's why he lost his footing.
This is for a 3. Very long putt.
Look at his position with his right foot...
Oh, yeah. ...against that wall.
Look at the reverse claw up high.
The reverse claw. One of the more unique grips
I've ever seen in golf.
♪♪
Good, solid putt.
Ohh. And it just misses.
That was a good effort.
So, Michael will clean this up. He will card a 4.
And that means that Tyler Kairey
is going to be putting for the win.
The Sax Man.
Tyler Kairey.
♪♪
Can he put his grip on that Golden Putter?
He can! That's the green jacket!
It is his!
The plaid jacket will go to Tyler Kairey
from Bloomington, Indiana.
That's a win!
He is one of our nine champions
who will play for a quarter million dollars.
So, that great moment of "Holey Moley" has arrived
when a championship-level golfer gets the plaid jacket from...
The champ is here.
..."Stephen Curry."
Congratulations. Welcome. Thank you.
Thank you, Steph Curry.
Did you just do air quotes? Did I?
Yeah. Oh.
Wonder why.
There we go. It looks good on you, bro.
Yeah, it does look good.
You did it. Congratulations.
Thank you. Let's get a team picture.
That's 1,000% Stephen Curry. [ Chuckles ]
"Holey Moley" on 3.
Bet my mother's life on it. Wow.
[ Camera shutter clicks ]
And we'll see you next time right here on "Holey Moley."