[audience applauding]
[announcer] All right. I gotta tell you,
I'm real proud to introduce this next artist
Ladies and gentlemen, Sinéad O'Connor.
Thank you.
-[videotape squeals] -[boos and cheers continue]
[mysterious music]
[Sinéad] I didn't mean to be strong.
I did suffer through a lot because everybody felt
I regret that I was so sad because of it.
I regret that I spent so many years
Ran down And the lady said it
Got burned down, ooh
Oh, oh, Jerusalem
[roars]
There was no therapy when I was growing up.
Everybody in music has a story in terms of their upbringing
There's something they need to get off their chest,
They're all, they're all looking at you, Sinéad,
out there in television land.
They're saying "Mother of God,
what did she do with her head?
That's a bit exaggerated actually.
That's in one year, of course.
Some scarlet ribbons
and I was like, "Oh, my God."
and makes me want to be a musician,
and makes me want to be an artist,
because of the song "Gotta Serve Somebody."
And I was obsessed with Bob Dylan from then on.
My mother had this fantastic record collection
which she would spread out on the dining room table
Her musical tastes ranged from John Lennon
right through to, like, Porgy and Bess.
That was all that was ever on telly,
was these just high class musicals, you know.
My father was into cello,
My parents separated when I was quite young,
and my mother was a very violent woman,
not a healthy woman mentally at all.
And she was physically
[tense music]
and I was able to soothe her with my voice,
My father is the type of man that didn't want
It wasn't talked about, even in the family.
The cause of my own abuse was the church's effect
on this country, which had produced my mother.
I spent my entire childhood being beaten up
under which my mother grew up
and under which her mother and her mother grew up.
I would compare Ireland to an abused child.
I'd a terrible
Broken heart...
that they were using to oppress my people.
Why were my grandparents so miserable
that they couldn't have a kiss
[Father Brian] The church influenced everything.
It affected every level of society.
It was a mortal sin to eat meat on a Friday.
You could go to hell for eating a sausage on a Friday.
Everything was gathered around
the power of the church over its people.
[Sinéad] I had loved the Catholic church,
That was a contract with the holy spirit I made,
[tense music]
I went into care when I was 14,
I was a bit messed up.
I was unmanageable, really, so they didn't want me at home.
The place was called "An Grianan," which means "The Sunrise."
[Jeannette] An Grianan was a residential training centre
The girls came from mixed backgrounds.
Others had come from insecure family settings
and they needed somewhere where there was structure
and safety for a few years.
[Sinéad] They got a guitar teacher in
who I still know and I still talk to now and then.
[Jeannette] The first night, I was there
because we were just stunned.
We needed to encourage her in this wonderful talent.
Ooh, I'm freezing!
[Jeannette] When we decided to get married,
One love
It was stunning. It was absolutely stunning.
[Sinéad] In the congregation was her brother, Paul Byrne,
[Paul] We were searching for a singer.
After chatting with Sinéad on the steps of the church,
So we went back up the next night and she sang it to us,
We had to book a couple of hours on a Wednesday afternoon
Picked her up, did two hours of vocals with her,
the nun, she could be terribly kind,
She sent me to sleep in the hospice part of the laundry
When I went up, there was no staff there with the ladies.
There was never any nuns or nurses.
were lying in their beds calling out for nurses all night
I didn't know what to do, and obviously, I was terrified.
Take my hand
[tense music]
[Jeannette] These women,
Very often the cases were they had been raped
They had to pay the price
and were locked away for their whole lives.
[Sinéad] The whole of Ireland talks about these ladies,
These people convinced my father that they could help me
with whatever behavioural issues I had
The problems were compounded.
My father, I'm sure the world would acknowledge,
Young woman With a drink in her hand
She liked to listen To rock and roll
'Cause it never gets old
[Clodagh] Sinéad and I met when we were
We were very close for a number of years
She really wanted to be doing her music.
[Sinéad] I put an ad in Hot Press magazine
that I was a singer and I wanted to find a band to join.
doing auditions for these various different bands.
I had a job at the Bad Ass Cafe on Crown Alley,
and we used to rehearse right across the road from it.
Nigel Grainge and Chris Hill came over to Dublin
[tense music]
He said, "Well, why don't you come to London
For five long years
But I found out
You treated me mean
Oh, you treated me cruel
[Mike] I worked with Sinéad from her arrival in London
Our job as a sort of group of musicians from the outset
She'd already found her voice,
that she wanted to wrap around that amazing voice.
[man] What's it called?
[John] So we went into a rehearsal studio in Putney
and rehearse for a long time.
Nigel Grange was the head of Ensign at the time.
I'm just as guilty as you
[John] The first time I heard Sinéad's voice,
And
I'm just as guilty as you
[Sinéad] You often hear artists saying
I think actually you're channelling yourself.
There were kind of songs to help her, to heal her.
[Mike] In some respects, I think the band that we were,
the band of musicians who were around her,
We were safe.
Fachtna O'Ceallaigh had been Boomtown Rats' manager
[reggae music]
where he had his friend Lepkey, and Leroy.
[Sinéad] Bearing in mind I'm Irish
and I've come from the theocracy,
roaring about the Pope is the devil,
[upbeat music]
Love to everyone. You're back in tune to The Rankin' Miss P,
on DBC, the Dread Broadcasting Corporation,
103.8 every Friday.
We're electric, y'all.
[upbeat drum music]
[John] She was really shy
just being kids, to be honest.
[Mike] Ensign wanted Sinéad to be a musical commodity.
[Sinéad] They wanted me to grow the hair long
there used to be riots in the streets over plays.
That's what art is for.
[Mike] That led to her deciding to shave off all her hair.
[mysterious music]
[Clodagh] At the time, I was her closest female friend.
You got to look through the letter box,
I looked through the letterbox and there she was
[dramatic music]
[John] The label were trying to brand Sinéad
You just looked at somebody and went,
It's a powerful statement for a woman because she says,
[Sinéad] Me and John were friends for a year
before, you know, we ever went out with each other.
We were both going out with different people and everything.
and then within a month I was pregnant.
The record companies in those days had their own doctors
that they sent you to.
[Mike] Ensign tried to dissuade her
and thankfully, she obviously stood her ground,
[Sinéad] That was the final straw for me.
[Mike] There was a big fallout.
Fachtna O'Ceallaigh was working very hard
telling me I owe it to them to not have my baby.
I just knew that I didn't want any man telling me
and I didn't take it from my daddy,
Can I do two?
[humming]
[John] The whole of "The Lion and the Cobra"
The second version was fresher, younger, and spontaneous.
Hands, gimme love
Hands, gimme those
I want your
Gimme, yes
Gimme this
[Sinéad] When we got the first album cover,
Put on the album and got me to scream along with the album.
because it was too aggressive-looking
[Kate] I didn't realize that they'd have to do
a different one for America.
You know, that would scare too many people.
this little girl with her bald head and her big belly,
[Peaches] I think her image screamed more than feminism,
beyond feminism at the time.
I think it was just like non-binary,
Her fashion sense was like 35 years ahead of the time.
[Maybury] People found it problematic just because
but actually the beauty of her features,
the quality of her eyes,
[Sinéad] Anytime I worked with John Maybury,
The set makers, stylists, the makeup people, you know,
and they like genuinely adored me.
I felt so safe and looked after.
[relaxed music]
[Maybury] She recognized in us kind of a sense of
And she was free to be who she wanted to be within that
because everyone else was free to be who they wanted to be.
They were so inspiring and still are to me,
You couldn't do that in Ireland.
You'd have the shit kicked out of you, you know?
Let me live 'neath your spell
That you do so well
For you do
Something to me
That nobody else
Can do
[crowd cheering]
Why I like performing and why I like singing loud
At the end of my day
Than I find that you're there When I wake
Just like you Said it would be
Will you be my lover?
[Sinéad] There are a lot of songs that I've written
And " Troy," I think was the first one.
It's also the first song I've wrote
Dublin in a rainstorm
So once when I was eight-and-a-half,
the whole thing of sitting in the long grass in summer
So I'm out in the garden in the fucking dark
to this day, I don't mind if it's day or night,
but dusk, I don't like.
And I'd be looking up at the only window
and I'd be screaming, begging her to let me in.
the house go dark.
Every other song I'm writing is about somebody else
"Troy" is the first song I've written about me.
It's not a song, it's a fucking testament.
And you should've Left the light on
Then I wouldn't have tried You'd never have known
And I wouldn't have Pulled you tighter
I wouldn't have screamed
No, I can't let you go
No, I wouldn't have Pulled you to me
You wouldn't have Begged me to hold you
Oh, oh
"Troy" is not safe.
I don't need to dig that up again.
There would've been no point writing
and/or going around the world screaming "Troy"
Make no difference What you say
You're still a liar
[crowd cheering]
[John] Sinéad was pregnant all through the making
of "The Lion and the Cobra."
And I think in many ways, actually,
There's nothing more deep and real than a baby.
And there's nothing more fake and unimportant
and a single Mandinka at 22 in the charts.
[crowd cheering]
[Clodagh] I remember watching
Sinéad on Top of the Pops.
I'm dancing the seven veils
[vocalizing]
I don't know no shame
But I do know Mandinka
I do know Mandinka
I do
[John] When "Mandinka" was released,
I said I do
I swear I do...
I just remember hearing the voice and it's nothing
Soon I can give You my heart...
[crowd cheering]
Telling me he'd be home
Sailed the seas For a hundred years
To me, it was like the whole package.
He said, "Your Jackie's gone We got lost in the rain"
And I ran to the beach
Laughing at you...
there's an intensity, almost a rage burning inside of you.
You're a small, demure, quiet sort of person.
If you're a woman in particular, and unless
you're very sort of timid and you want to make
When I leave Ireland, it's virtually unheard of
The Irish fucking constitution still contains the wording
So many people in this country, women in particular,
or be open about their anger.
At that time in Ireland, women weren't allowed to be angry.
And I think that might've been hard for some of them
because, you know, they had spent their whole life
saying no to themselves.
[man] Tonight, the Grammy awards are presenting
comes from Ireland and with her very first album,
I'm dancing the seven veils
[John] I remember talking to her the next day and she said,
"Oh, my God, I went on stage and Stevie Wonder
So this was quite a leap, you know.
I don't know no shame
But I do know Man-din-ka
[Sinéad] You know, you're there and you're looking
As I sang Mandinka, I had "Jake's baby girl"
on the back of my pants and I had Public Enemy logo painted
[Chuck D] I protested the Grammy's in 1989
that she was fake.
she seriously has issues with this.
[crowd cheering and clapping]
[Sinéad] In one way, I loved it.
In another way, I was frightened by it.
this identity and I didn't feel like it was really me.
I couldn't understand why anyone liked my records.
Let me tell you how stupid I am. Um...
We were sitting here doing this interview
So now I'm doing it.
because I want to wear red knickers, you know?
-No. -[mellow acoustic guitar]
[John] We got married at the spiritualist centre in Sloane Square
I'd lost my dad and a sister.
[music playing]
[Margo] In 1989, we filmed Hush-a-Bye Baby in Derry.
She came over with John.
who was just a toddler at that stage.
Of course, I only have eyes for Lecce Loves.
[both laugh]
[both scream and laugh]
[Margo] We were trying to contribute to the debate
like so many thousands of other women,
especially young women.
and about the obvious trauma and awfulness
And girls are made to feel as if they're sluts
and the contraceptive laws and all that sort of thing
[Margo] In the 80s and 90s and obviously the decades before that,
It was appalling.
[Roísín] There was a sense of being in this
you couldn't get condoms, so this was a big issue.
[man] It's quite a similar story to your own, isn't it?
Last time you told me that there were certain attitudes in Ireland.
Yeah, except I had a baby when I was 20
And I was in a society that doesn't look down on pregnancy
who has no money and no boyfriend and no support
I think I was in very... nice circumstances
[rock music playing]
It seems years Since you held the baby...
you don't really expect anything to happen.
And I remember I was quite taken aback by the whole thing,
amused at the idea of me sitting and doing press conferences
and things like that because it was just
and put my album out I was 20,
And now I'm 23 which is still extremely young
and I'm still developing my "personality", in inverted commas.
And I'm still discovering things about myself
[John] When the album "I Do Not Want What I Haven't Got",
and he said, "This is like reading somebody's diaries.
I'm not putting it out."
Well, I am far more proud of this album
[Maybury] The way she grew in confidence
She's a powerful, sexual being.
I think she was enjoying playing with the gender roles,
and the toughness of denim or the Dr. Martin boots
There's always still this beautiful woman,
She came to understand the nature of what we were doing
[John] "The Nothing Compares To You" video,
she came back with all the rushes on a VHS
and we've stuck it into the video machine, I was watching it.
[Jerry] The video was shot both in studio and it was shot
The extraordinary close-up work that John did
[gentle music]
[Maybury] In between takes,
and light up a spliff, and be bopping around the studio.
We weren't in a kind of particularly sombre mood.
Looking into my monitor, looking down that lens,
It was like, "Oh, okay,
[Sinéad] If you don't
identify emotionally with a song, you can't sing it.
I didn't know I was gonna cry singing it.
I didn't cry in the studio,
it was just because of the big eye on me
in the form of a camera.
Every time I sing the song, I think of my mother.
I never stopped crying for my mother for, Jesus,
So yeah, I was thinking of her and I suppose my subconscious
I think it's funny that the world fell in love with me
I went and did a lot of crying
[audience clapping]
Good to see you. Will you be number one on Monday?
I don't know, you know.
I don't want to count my chickens.
it doesn't really make a difference,
We shouldn't even be thinking about this.
Shouldn't even be thinking about it, okay.
[audience laughing]
[John] The song went number one,
everywhere in the world pretty much.
And the winner is... Sinéad O'Connor.
-Sinéad O'Connor. -Sinéad O'Connor.
You know, peace.
[upbeat music]
[man] It's Sinéad O'Connor.
Sinéad, "Nothing Compares To You."
[Claire] The level of when "Nothing Compares To You"
became a hit was extraordinary.
It really was off the scale.
She was the biggest thing.
or Amy Winehouse,
I didn't realize how huge the single and the album were.
I really didn't.
and it said that the record had been
something like the fourth biggest record in America,
I nearly dropped dead.
She was suddenly a major act.
Hello!
The tour got bigger and bigger instead of theatres,
It seems like years Since you held the baby
You said it was Dangerous after Sunday
but this is going to be really good.
I am stretched On your grave
My apple tree My brightness
For I smell of the earth
we did a place in New Jersey.
Sinéad got to hear about it, and said
we won't play it."
And I thought, "Oh, this is going to be everywhere tomorrow."
"Oh, God, have you seen the papers?"
With American soldiers on foreign soil
patriotism is running at fever pitch.
the National Anthem on our station
to support the troops over in the Middle East,
The wrong time, the wrong place
within her own management,
"Sinéad, shut up."
[caller 1] You don't like America, then get the hell out.
She wants the money, the fame and the glorification.
[Irish newsreader] One extreme patriot is Frank Sinatra,
who said he would like to kick her ass.
to kick her ass", says Sinéad 's father, John O'Connor.
[Claire] As soon as someone highlighted
that it had to be played, she would say,
and why are you telling me what to do?"
I'm looking at you. I'm thinking 14 in the side pocket.
and the suffering in the world right now.
Come on, swing baby, you're platinum. Forget the head.
Put a bag over it and do your business.
You're supposed to have long hair wear push-up bras
and lip gloss, you know, and shut up and sing.
Maybe if I was a man, there wouldn't be such a fuss about it
It's just not expected of women, I don't know.
But then nothing about me, particularly, in people's minds,
that they have because I'm a woman.
I don't think it was a situation being wrong or right.
in the way that I felt would be most true to myself.
I didn't mean to offend anybody.
and people like that
and what they may or may not write about.
who are very offensive as well,
So it leaves me thinking that it's
So, you know, if it happened now,
I might've reacted in a different way,
well, you didn't not take the money.
I don't perform or make records or do anything
in order to make money.
It's not the thing that I hold
So we're going to wave it at her and see what she does.
[Sinéad] It's a very patriotic country.
And a lot of people have been told
which is very irresponsible on behalf of the media,
because that does put a person in a situation
where literally their life could be at risk.
[atmospheric music]
[John] When the press started to attack her
[singing]
Margaret Thatcher on TV
[John] She's always championed justice.
[singing]
And that's why I'm leaving
Young mother Down at Smithfield
5:00 a.m., looking for food For her kids...
when she wrote that song, you know, it was around us,
you know, that kind of police versus the Black community.
[Sinéad] I write songs about things
that I feel strongly about.
It's not consciously to write a political song
And I think that that's what every person's duty
when they think something's wrong.
I imagine so.
I'm an Irish artist,
and there's a tradition among Irish artists
You know, whether they're playwrights or poets.
An artists job is sometimes to create
the difficult conversations that need to be had.
what anyone thinks of me when I do that.
[chanting]
[newsreader] The right to choose an abortion,
Abortion will be legalized in this country very soon.
Let's have another referendum
when only women of childbearing age vote
The church deliberately distract us from that,
by making it into an either anti or for,
[Elaine] I never felt that Sinéad would cave
to any pressure. Ever.
It is the creative community that are driven by greed.
That's why none of them are saying anything
It's why nobody has said anything about the war.
[Elaine] When Sinéad refused to perform at the Grammys,
As if that were even possible.
but I felt that my career could certainly be in jeopardy,
and Sinéad's as well.
These were powerful people in the industry.
[Chuck D] I didn't think that the powers that be were ready for her.
Where she's from,
but maybe in different genres,
and not so much as a pop superstar.
Okay, so this is my favourite place in the universe,
All the Rastas live there,
The object of my game coming into the music business was
And also, I suppose, spiritually true to myself,
do you know what I mean?
The music business can be a bit of a vampiric arena.
[Sinéad] Gary.
-Yes? -Say hello to Jake.
-Him Jake. -[Sinéad] That's Gary.
Maybe we'll get to see you, Jake.
[Sinéad] He's really mad.
as if you're in a popularity contest,
[instrumental music]
That was the last one, wasn't it?
-[man] Yes. -[Sinéad] I didn't want to fall into that trap then
of you know, the follow up album to the number one, single.
all of a sudden you could go in there
[trumpets blasting]
Let's listen back and make sure we love this arrangement.
this was a great antidote, really to what happened.
And it had the most amazing team of arrangers, musicians,
We used to go out walking
You had planned...
It was just astonishing being in a room
and I couldn't see myself as being anyway good.
Am I not your girl?
[Sinéad] There were things going on in my own life.
Basically fucking everything I had been raised to believe was a lie.
Ave, ave, ave Maria
[Announcer] At the end of the line of bishops, walked the Pope.
[crowd cheers]
and the next was a picture of the Pope,
which had been on her bedroom wall.
[Pope John Paul II] Young people of Ireland,
I love you.
[crowd cheers]
[Sinéad] He didn't fucking love me.
You know, it was such a lie.
And I had a right to fight that evil
because I loved the church.
and I've got fuck all to lose
that hasn't been done already.
[Elaine] I had booked her on Saturday Night Live.
which was, "Am I Not Your Girl."
and this would really help it.
[crowd applauds]
Until the philosophy
It's a speech that the Emperor Haile Selassie
had made at the United Nations, and then Bob Marley
turned it into a song.
Than the colour of his eyes
I've got to say war...
And rumours of war
Children, children
We find it necessary
We have confidence
Fight the real enemy.
[Elaine] Nobody knows what to do.
She blows a candle out, she goes off stage,
And I had gone into the dressing room after her,
and I said, "You know, I can't get you out of this."
And she said, "You know what? I don't want you to."
[host] What effect do you think
I don't know.
Do you think what you have done
Well, I can't really say. I don't know.
which you said don't seem to be negative, right?
[narrator] Sinéad O'Connor is no stranger to controversy.
[reporter 2] The network says O'Connor's tirade caught them off guard.
NBC logged a thousand complaint calls...
certainly unauthorized by NBC,
and NBC was offended by what she did.
[reporter] The Catholic league for religious and civil rights
During the lunch hour, they passed out leaflets,
Actually, we were just going to send them to her.
Someone said, don't send the tapes new.
Break them up, 'cause she'll sell them again.
[audience applauds]
Sinéad O'Connor... [gags], you know and so on.
Or you just don't like that she tore up a picture of the Pope.
But I'll tell you one thing, she was very lucky
it wasn't my show.
Sinéad O'Conner, who's big theme is child abuse...
-All right? -It all comes from child abuse.
[John] I got a little bit worried,
It was a terrible time for us.
[Claire] I had fan letters with death threats to myself,
death threats to Sinéad,
or to me, or any of our team.
And we were all applauding and cheering and were like,
"Oh, no, Sinéad O'Connor is an icon. She's ahead of her time."
I think I probably was joining in, "Oh, God, what's she doing now?"
Fight the real enemy.
and tear up a photo of Uncle Fester.
[reporter] Do you enjoy shocking people?
Some other time, I'll talk to you about it.
[reporter] But obviously you don't have any regrets.
[Kris Kristofferson] I'm real proud...
and integrity.
[crowd cheers]
Thank you.
[Sinéad] I'm on stage and the audience start making this
and half of them are cheering.
And it's the fucking weirdest noise
I've ever heard in my life. And it makes me want to puke.
[crowd cheering]
[Sinéad] My song that I was supposed to sing
"Are you going to stand by me"
[crowd cheering]
Okay, turn this up.
Until the philosophy
And another inferior
Is finally
Everywhere is war
Than the colour of his eyes
Until, the basic Human rights
Are equally Guaranteed to all
Without regard to race
I say war
And until
Child abuse, yeah
Utterly destroyed
[Kathleen] Everything kind of coalesced into that moment.
Someone who grew up in a household
of abuse and rejection,
by what probably felt like the whole entire world,
[John] People that would boo Sinéad O'Connor,
what were they doing at a Bob Dylan concert?
[Sinéad] "My name is Sinéad O'Connor,
I am deserving,
I deserve to be treated with respect,
I am and have always been carrying a lot of grief,
from my lost childhood,
To get to the joy,
but I know that if you could really listen,
there's a mirror into which we are not looking.
There's no way I'm going to shut my mouth,
just because they don't want to hear about it.
[Peaches] We all have, mental health issues,
and it's very important for us to recognize that,
[Sinéad] I was always being crazied by the media,
made out to be crazy.
[Skin] Sinéad was put into isolation.
She, was still making great music,
still making great records,
In those days, if the press weren't talking about you,
if you weren't on the radio, if you weren't on TV screens,
Which is what happened with Sinéad,
[Sinéad] I have about a ten-year period
because it suddenly became a free for all
for everybody around me,
They didn't like what they saw on the mirror,
but when I was younger, I was just hurt.
[Dr. Sinéad Kennedy] The willingness to tell her story,
to share them, with Ireland and with the world,
[Enda Kenny] On behalf of this state,
deeply regret, and apologize unreservedly,
Today, we live in a very different country,
with a very different consciousness,
and a very different awareness.
An Ireland where we have more compassion,
In Ireland, it's being called a quiet revolution,
to repeal a constitutional ban on abortion.
[women chanting]
[woman] Yeah, I'm proud to be Irish today
[Roisin] Wherever there's that righteous anger
of a woman now, who is making a difference,
who's changing things,
who's standing up and being courageous.
We are seeing the rights that people fought for being pulled back,
being diminished,
We need to keep showing how effective it is,
[crowd chanting]
Women's bodies are under attack!
[Chuck D] There's a lot of artists that came afterward,
She broke the ice for a whole decade
or two decades of artists after her.
[upbeat music]
[reporter] A government inquiry last year
put their church's reputation
before the interests of their flock,
But the scandals go far beyond Ireland,
and touch the Vatican directly.
Last week, it was alleged that Pope Benedict,
then known as Cardinal Ratzinger,
had prevented the church trial,
The church in Ireland, must acknowledge before the Lord
and others, the serious sins committed
against defenceless children.
[Kathleen] Sinéad O'Connor as an artist, forged her own path
in a world that just was not ready for her.
showed up, and just rocked the shit out of the horse cart.
I don't want to see her as a martyr,
because she's a three-dimensional human being.
[calm music]
that that really, really killed me and hurt me.
You know?
it didn't suit me being a pop star.
it was the proudest thing I've ever done as an artist.
They broke my heart and they killed me, but I didn't die.
They tried to bury me,
Thank you for hearing me
Thank you for loving me
Which means forsaking me
Thank you for seeing me
And for not leaving me
Thank you For staying with me
Thanks for not hurting me
You are gentle with me
Thanks for silence with me
Thank you for holding me
Thank you for helping me
Thank you
For breaking my heart
Now I've a strong
Strong heart
Thank you
For breaking my heart
[vocalizing]