1 00:00:02,627 --> 00:00:05,755 gentle music 2 00:00:07,674 --> 00:00:09,509 [Attell] I love this club. It's The Comedy Store, guys. 3 00:00:09,551 --> 00:00:10,760 Legendary. 4 00:00:10,802 --> 00:00:13,179 [cheers and applause] 5 00:00:13,221 --> 00:00:14,806 Some of you don't know it, 6 00:00:14,848 --> 00:00:16,141 but I'll say it right now. 7 00:00:16,182 --> 00:00:17,851 Jeff, you know this place is haunted, right? 8 00:00:17,892 --> 00:00:18,893 I've heard that, actually. 9 00:00:18,935 --> 00:00:20,186 Yeah, my career died here 10 00:00:20,228 --> 00:00:23,314 about ten years ago, so... 11 00:00:23,606 --> 00:00:25,191 [Binder] It was 40 years ago 12 00:00:25,233 --> 00:00:26,860 that I spent almost every night of my life 13 00:00:26,901 --> 00:00:27,944 on these stages. 14 00:00:27,986 --> 00:00:29,195 - Hello. - [piano riff plays] 15 00:00:29,237 --> 00:00:31,364 Wait, start it up. [chuckles] 16 00:00:31,406 --> 00:00:32,741 Sorry about that. I was late 17 00:00:32,782 --> 00:00:34,451 'cause, uh, I had to kill a guy. 18 00:00:34,492 --> 00:00:36,036 [laughter] 19 00:00:36,077 --> 00:00:37,746 I left Detroit right after high school 20 00:00:37,787 --> 00:00:40,457 and came out here, got a job as a doorman, 21 00:00:40,498 --> 00:00:43,168 fought for stage time, and worked my way up. 22 00:00:43,209 --> 00:00:45,003 I had lied and told my parents 23 00:00:45,045 --> 00:00:46,838 I was going to LA Community College, 24 00:00:46,880 --> 00:00:49,215 but this was my college, 25 00:00:49,257 --> 00:00:51,843 my springboard into a career as a comic, 26 00:00:51,885 --> 00:00:54,512 then an actor, 27 00:00:54,554 --> 00:00:56,431 then a writer and a director. 28 00:00:56,473 --> 00:00:58,141 Like hundreds and hundreds of others 29 00:00:58,183 --> 00:00:59,392 before me and after me, 30 00:00:59,434 --> 00:01:01,186 these rooms and these hallways 31 00:01:01,227 --> 00:01:03,271 were a magical gateway to show business 32 00:01:03,313 --> 00:01:05,565 to anyone with a comic bent. 33 00:01:05,607 --> 00:01:07,734 This building was what I called home 34 00:01:07,776 --> 00:01:09,319 for many, many years. 35 00:01:09,360 --> 00:01:11,780 I'm going through a breakup next week. 36 00:01:11,821 --> 00:01:14,449 - [laughter] - Yeah. 37 00:01:14,491 --> 00:01:16,242 My boyfriend tried to talk shit on that joke. 38 00:01:16,284 --> 00:01:17,160 He came up to me. He's like, 39 00:01:17,202 --> 00:01:18,244 "I don't like that joke." 40 00:01:18,286 --> 00:01:19,871 I was like, "Well, a little awkward. 41 00:01:19,913 --> 00:01:21,372 It's not about you." Like... 42 00:01:22,457 --> 00:01:23,374 [Jeselnik] Like a lot of guys, 43 00:01:23,416 --> 00:01:25,043 I'll always remember 44 00:01:25,085 --> 00:01:27,712 the one time I saw my dad's penis. 45 00:01:29,547 --> 00:01:32,759 I said, "Dad, don't text me shit like that." 46 00:01:34,302 --> 00:01:35,762 [Binder] It's amazing to be back 47 00:01:35,804 --> 00:01:38,640 at The Comedy Store all these years later, 48 00:01:38,681 --> 00:01:39,724 to see it so hot again, 49 00:01:39,766 --> 00:01:41,935 to see a new generation of comedians 50 00:01:41,976 --> 00:01:44,813 with the same passion that I and all my friends had. 51 00:01:44,854 --> 00:01:47,357 contemplative music 52 00:01:47,398 --> 00:01:49,400 Marc Maron was a comic at the Store 53 00:01:49,442 --> 00:01:51,319 a few years after I was there. 54 00:01:51,361 --> 00:01:52,737 When his career was going nowhere, 55 00:01:52,779 --> 00:01:55,406 he started a podcast in his garage that became 56 00:01:55,448 --> 00:01:58,118 one of the most successful podcasts in the world. 57 00:02:00,245 --> 00:02:04,082 My being a guest on WTF with Marc Maron 58 00:02:04,124 --> 00:02:05,792 is the thing that reunited me 59 00:02:05,834 --> 00:02:07,710 with The Comedy Store in the first place. 60 00:02:07,752 --> 00:02:09,629 But did you get here when it first opened? 61 00:02:09,671 --> 00:02:11,756 No. Uh, the Store first opened 62 00:02:11,798 --> 00:02:13,383 in '72. 63 00:02:13,424 --> 00:02:14,676 - Sammy Shore opened it. - [Maron] Sammy, okay. 64 00:02:14,717 --> 00:02:16,511 - Mitzi's husband, right. - [Binder] Yes. 65 00:02:16,553 --> 00:02:18,763 And he's a big Vegas opening act. 66 00:02:18,805 --> 00:02:20,807 He opened for Elvis, Barbra Streisand, 67 00:02:20,849 --> 00:02:22,183 - people like that. - [Maron] Right, right, right. 68 00:02:22,225 --> 00:02:23,393 - Sammy Shore is... - [Binder] Sammy Shore. 69 00:02:23,434 --> 00:02:25,228 And they were married at the time. 70 00:02:25,270 --> 00:02:26,604 [Binder] They had four kids. 71 00:02:26,646 --> 00:02:28,982 [Maron] Sandy, Scotty, Pauly, and Peter. 72 00:02:29,023 --> 00:02:30,608 [Binder] Peter. And they live up 73 00:02:30,650 --> 00:02:33,153 in Dorothy Lamour's old house up on Doheny. 74 00:02:33,194 --> 00:02:34,654 [Maron] She kept that house forever. 75 00:02:34,696 --> 00:02:36,447 [Binder] He opens it with his buddy, Rudy De Luca, 76 00:02:36,489 --> 00:02:37,991 who's a big feature writer. 77 00:02:38,032 --> 00:02:39,617 He opens the Store in '72. 78 00:02:39,659 --> 00:02:41,077 - Yeah, they rent a room... - [Maron] Right. 79 00:02:41,119 --> 00:02:43,079 [Binder] ...in what was-- used to be Ciro's nightclub, 80 00:02:43,121 --> 00:02:44,747 where Humphrey Bogart 81 00:02:44,789 --> 00:02:46,499 and George Raft and Peter Lorre... 82 00:02:46,541 --> 00:02:47,667 [Maron] And Danny Thomas. 83 00:02:47,709 --> 00:02:48,877 [Binder] ...and Sammy Davis Jr., 84 00:02:48,918 --> 00:02:50,461 It was so big that Warner Brothers 85 00:02:50,503 --> 00:02:52,255 used to do cartoons 86 00:02:52,297 --> 00:02:54,340 based on all their stars going there. 87 00:02:54,382 --> 00:02:55,717 - [Maron] Yeah. - [Binder] And it was now 88 00:02:55,758 --> 00:02:57,343 just, like, a Mexican discotheque 89 00:02:57,385 --> 00:02:59,179 run by Art Laboe, and he-- 90 00:02:59,220 --> 00:03:00,930 he rented out the front room to Sammy. 91 00:03:00,972 --> 00:03:03,683 And it was just a hangout club for comedians 92 00:03:03,725 --> 00:03:04,851 who--there was no lineup. 93 00:03:04,893 --> 00:03:06,561 He would just throw whoever was there 94 00:03:06,603 --> 00:03:07,937 up on stage. 95 00:03:07,979 --> 00:03:10,190 He would go to Vegas, and Mitzi would run the club. 96 00:03:10,231 --> 00:03:11,733 Mitzi actually was the one 97 00:03:11,774 --> 00:03:13,401 that came up with the name The Comedy Store. 98 00:03:13,443 --> 00:03:14,736 [Maron] I heard that, like, you know, he was 99 00:03:14,777 --> 00:03:16,404 away on the road, and she wanted to leave him, 100 00:03:16,446 --> 00:03:17,864 and she just took it over. 101 00:03:17,906 --> 00:03:19,741 [Binder] Yeah. They end up having a bad divorce. 102 00:03:19,782 --> 00:03:21,242 - [Maron] Right. - [Binder] She didn't want 103 00:03:21,284 --> 00:03:23,161 alimony; she said, "Just give me the club." 104 00:03:23,203 --> 00:03:24,913 He's laughing about it! He--really? 105 00:03:24,954 --> 00:03:26,706 - [Maron] Yeah. - [Binder] And she says yeah, 106 00:03:26,748 --> 00:03:28,541 'cause she loves the comedians. 107 00:03:28,583 --> 00:03:29,834 - [Maron] Yeah. - [Binder] And the comedians 108 00:03:29,876 --> 00:03:32,587 love her, and she has this affinity for them. 109 00:03:32,629 --> 00:03:34,839 - [Maron] Yeah. - [Binder] And she turned it 110 00:03:34,881 --> 00:03:36,466 into something huge. 111 00:03:36,507 --> 00:03:38,509 - [Maron] Mecca. - [Binder] Mecca for comedians. 112 00:03:38,551 --> 00:03:39,928 [Maron] You have to go through--you have to jump 113 00:03:39,969 --> 00:03:41,471 through the hurdles; you gotta enter the system. 114 00:03:41,512 --> 00:03:42,555 - You gotta be a doorman. - [Binder] Y-yeah. 115 00:03:42,597 --> 00:03:44,474 [Maron] You gotta listen to what she says 116 00:03:44,515 --> 00:03:46,601 to you and about you and take her advice... 117 00:03:46,643 --> 00:03:48,394 - [Binder] Right. - And work for no money. 118 00:03:48,436 --> 00:03:49,896 [Binder] Yeah, but the system worked. 119 00:03:49,938 --> 00:03:52,398 She changed the way comedy was presented. 120 00:03:52,440 --> 00:03:54,108 Before her, stand-up comics 121 00:03:54,150 --> 00:03:56,277 didn't follow each other on a show. 122 00:03:56,319 --> 00:03:58,029 It was always a singer or a juggler 123 00:03:58,071 --> 00:03:59,572 in between the comics. 124 00:03:59,614 --> 00:04:01,199 No one thought you could just throw 125 00:04:01,241 --> 00:04:04,160 one comic after another up on stage, 126 00:04:04,202 --> 00:04:05,787 but Mitzi did it, and soon, 127 00:04:05,828 --> 00:04:08,206 other clubs and then TV shows did it. 128 00:04:08,248 --> 00:04:09,666 She went through hell, though. 129 00:04:09,707 --> 00:04:11,751 The old owners threw her out of her building. 130 00:04:11,793 --> 00:04:13,044 She had to figure out a way to buy it, 131 00:04:13,086 --> 00:04:14,587 even though she didn't have the money. 132 00:04:14,629 --> 00:04:16,464 She passed away a couple years ago, 133 00:04:16,506 --> 00:04:18,132 but the Store is her legacy. 134 00:04:18,174 --> 00:04:19,425 It's the epicenter 135 00:04:19,467 --> 00:04:21,177 of stand-up comedy in the world. 136 00:04:21,219 --> 00:04:23,304 Ask any working comedian anywhere 137 00:04:23,346 --> 00:04:26,057 which club means the most in terms of bragging rights 138 00:04:26,099 --> 00:04:27,809 to say you're a regular in. 139 00:04:27,850 --> 00:04:30,520 Hands down, it's The Comedy Store. 140 00:04:30,561 --> 00:04:33,731 spacey music 141 00:06:03,112 --> 00:06:05,156 First time I ever heard of The Comedy Store, 142 00:06:05,198 --> 00:06:06,783 I think I watched a special. 143 00:06:06,824 --> 00:06:08,534 When I saw it, I go, "This is where I gotta be. 144 00:06:08,576 --> 00:06:09,410 The Comedy Store." 145 00:06:09,452 --> 00:06:11,287 I drove by it in '94, 146 00:06:11,329 --> 00:06:12,997 and I was on a vacation 147 00:06:13,039 --> 00:06:14,874 just to see where it was, and I'd already been doing comedy 148 00:06:14,916 --> 00:06:16,584 for, like, two years, and I remember thinking, 149 00:06:16,626 --> 00:06:17,543 "Someday, I'm gonna play there." 150 00:06:17,585 --> 00:06:19,003 If I actually could just not 151 00:06:19,045 --> 00:06:20,254 have a temper, 152 00:06:20,296 --> 00:06:21,422 like, I don't even know what my wife 153 00:06:21,464 --> 00:06:23,383 would be able to complain about, 154 00:06:23,424 --> 00:06:24,884 'cause that's really all she has on me. 155 00:06:24,926 --> 00:06:27,387 I work my ass off, I make a great living, 156 00:06:27,428 --> 00:06:29,055 I'm a great dad, I do the dishes, 157 00:06:29,097 --> 00:06:30,056 I like cleaning up, 158 00:06:30,098 --> 00:06:31,641 I fucking handle shit, you know? 159 00:06:31,682 --> 00:06:34,769 All she has on me is who I am as a person. 160 00:06:35,937 --> 00:06:37,271 That's it. 161 00:06:37,313 --> 00:06:39,190 [Letterman] Within two weeks of coming out here, 162 00:06:39,232 --> 00:06:40,566 I showed up on a Monday night 163 00:06:40,608 --> 00:06:42,068 and went on stage, 164 00:06:42,110 --> 00:06:44,612 petrified, blinded by the light, 165 00:06:44,654 --> 00:06:46,906 and did okay, not--not great. 166 00:06:46,948 --> 00:06:48,282 I had no material. 167 00:06:48,324 --> 00:06:50,243 It was at that point that Mitzi said, 168 00:06:50,284 --> 00:06:53,496 [accented] "Oh, you should-- you're from Indiana. 169 00:06:53,538 --> 00:06:55,248 I'm from Wisconsin." 170 00:06:55,289 --> 00:06:59,710 I said, "Yeah, I recognize the Lower Great Lakes accent." 171 00:06:59,752 --> 00:07:02,046 She said, "You should come back," 172 00:07:02,088 --> 00:07:04,257 and so I said, "Great!" 173 00:07:04,298 --> 00:07:05,800 I drove home, and I thought, "Wow, 174 00:07:05,842 --> 00:07:07,969 this is a personal breakthrough." 175 00:07:08,010 --> 00:07:10,763 The next week, I came back, there was a list of people, 176 00:07:10,805 --> 00:07:12,723 and my name wasn't on it, and I'm thinking, 177 00:07:12,765 --> 00:07:14,475 "I think she said I should come back," 178 00:07:14,517 --> 00:07:16,477 and then finally, my friend George said, 179 00:07:16,519 --> 00:07:19,313 "Dumbass, you have to call in, 180 00:07:19,355 --> 00:07:21,524 and they'll give you a time." 181 00:07:21,566 --> 00:07:24,610 I spent one entire week kind of... 182 00:07:24,652 --> 00:07:26,154 [meekly] "Oh, I guess they don't want me." 183 00:07:26,195 --> 00:07:29,240 [Cummings] I wanted to be a part of this place so badly 184 00:07:29,282 --> 00:07:31,659 that I looked for apartments 185 00:07:31,701 --> 00:07:33,035 that were close to The Comedy Store 186 00:07:33,077 --> 00:07:34,287 that I could walk to. 187 00:07:34,328 --> 00:07:35,329 Today was kind of humiliating. 188 00:07:35,371 --> 00:07:37,457 I, uh--I ran into my ex-boyfriend 189 00:07:37,498 --> 00:07:39,625 in the self-help section of the bookstore. 190 00:07:39,667 --> 00:07:41,252 And, like, it's just-- I should've known 191 00:07:41,294 --> 00:07:42,795 he was gonna be at the bookstore, 192 00:07:42,837 --> 00:07:44,881 you know, 'cause I followed him there. 193 00:07:44,922 --> 00:07:47,675 [Rock] I had a good set. Mitzi automatically liked me. 194 00:07:47,717 --> 00:07:50,052 I think part of it, she liked me, 195 00:07:50,094 --> 00:07:54,307 and part of it is she wanted someone in the club 196 00:07:54,348 --> 00:07:56,767 that was Pauly's age. 197 00:07:56,809 --> 00:08:00,396 This did not endear me to the comedians. 198 00:08:00,438 --> 00:08:01,647 [laughs] Comedians like, 199 00:08:01,689 --> 00:08:03,232 "Who the fuck is this guy?" 200 00:08:03,274 --> 00:08:05,067 [Binder] What was so special about the Store? 201 00:08:05,109 --> 00:08:06,819 This was a beam. 202 00:08:06,861 --> 00:08:09,322 This--this was a beam from the center of the Earth 203 00:08:09,363 --> 00:08:11,199 to infinite space. 204 00:08:11,240 --> 00:08:13,576 Many dared step in the beam, 205 00:08:13,618 --> 00:08:15,620 and only a few could handle it, 206 00:08:15,661 --> 00:08:17,205 but when you--it-- you know, when it-- 207 00:08:17,246 --> 00:08:18,498 when it worked, man, 208 00:08:18,539 --> 00:08:20,249 there was just nothing like this place. 209 00:08:20,291 --> 00:08:21,834 One of the main things I wanted when I came out here was 210 00:08:21,876 --> 00:08:23,503 to get my name on The Comedy Store on the outside, 211 00:08:23,544 --> 00:08:25,171 'cause that would make me feel like I was a comic. 212 00:08:25,213 --> 00:08:26,380 [Williams] You could come out here 213 00:08:26,422 --> 00:08:27,298 and talk about stuff 214 00:08:27,340 --> 00:08:28,758 that was so bleak, 215 00:08:28,799 --> 00:08:30,134 but yet so funny. 216 00:08:30,176 --> 00:08:31,511 Maybe it's 'cause the room is black. 217 00:08:31,552 --> 00:08:33,429 I don't know. You can get away with it. 218 00:08:33,471 --> 00:08:34,639 I don't even know what the idea is 219 00:08:34,680 --> 00:08:36,599 behind the black. Never questioned it. 220 00:08:36,641 --> 00:08:38,184 Didn't care. I just thought maybe it makes 221 00:08:38,226 --> 00:08:39,393 the writing stand out in the front. 222 00:08:39,435 --> 00:08:41,479 I always liken The Comedy Store 223 00:08:41,521 --> 00:08:44,857 to, like, an abusive boyfriend. 224 00:08:44,899 --> 00:08:47,693 You're like, "Oh, my God, this hurts so much. 225 00:08:47,735 --> 00:08:49,362 Why do I stay?" 226 00:08:49,403 --> 00:08:50,446 And then when you leave, you're like, 227 00:08:50,488 --> 00:08:51,656 "Oh, my God, I miss him so much. 228 00:08:51,697 --> 00:08:52,532 Like, I need him." 229 00:08:52,573 --> 00:08:53,449 I've been doing stand-up 230 00:08:53,491 --> 00:08:54,700 for about seven years, 231 00:08:54,742 --> 00:08:56,452 and I came to The Comedy Store, 232 00:08:56,494 --> 00:08:57,453 and it was scary. 233 00:08:57,495 --> 00:08:59,372 Guys that are legit headliners, 234 00:08:59,413 --> 00:09:02,583 legit successful at this business, 235 00:09:02,625 --> 00:09:05,086 nervous as shit in that hallway. 236 00:09:05,127 --> 00:09:07,088 I think they would murder anyone in the world 237 00:09:07,129 --> 00:09:09,549 to put that OR, that jewel, in your crown. 238 00:09:09,590 --> 00:09:11,884 I started washing dishes back there, 239 00:09:11,926 --> 00:09:13,469 and then one night, I was working 240 00:09:13,511 --> 00:09:14,679 on open mic night, 241 00:09:14,720 --> 00:09:16,097 and I thought, 242 00:09:16,138 --> 00:09:17,890 "I think I can do it." 243 00:09:17,932 --> 00:09:19,308 I had walked on stage last night, and I go, 244 00:09:19,350 --> 00:09:22,562 "Do you guys realize what-- the show you're getting? 245 00:09:22,603 --> 00:09:24,647 Just take a moment to, like, be grateful, 246 00:09:24,689 --> 00:09:27,275 because this lineup is nuts!" 247 00:09:27,316 --> 00:09:28,734 It's nuts. 248 00:09:28,776 --> 00:09:30,945 I mean, if you added up the ticket price 249 00:09:30,987 --> 00:09:32,780 of each of these people on the road, 250 00:09:32,822 --> 00:09:34,240 this is thousands of dollars 251 00:09:34,282 --> 00:09:35,950 for this ticket that you're seeing tonight. 252 00:09:35,992 --> 00:09:38,119 So I've been addicted to this game on my phone. 253 00:09:38,160 --> 00:09:39,954 It's this game where you, like, set up-- 254 00:09:39,996 --> 00:09:42,081 everyone that sets up, like, their avatar, 255 00:09:42,123 --> 00:09:43,916 and then they set up, like a profile, 256 00:09:43,958 --> 00:09:45,459 and then they just try to kill each other. 257 00:09:45,501 --> 00:09:47,128 It's called Twitter. 258 00:09:47,169 --> 00:09:52,091 I don't think that there's a single building in America 259 00:09:52,133 --> 00:09:56,637 that has affected culture more than the Store. 260 00:09:56,679 --> 00:09:58,598 The list of people... 261 00:09:58,639 --> 00:10:00,558 Richard Pryor, 262 00:10:00,600 --> 00:10:02,435 arguably the greatest comedian ever, 263 00:10:02,476 --> 00:10:03,769 home base. 264 00:10:03,811 --> 00:10:06,355 Kinison, home base. 265 00:10:06,397 --> 00:10:07,773 Dice, home base. 266 00:10:07,815 --> 00:10:10,359 Comedy culture writ large. 267 00:10:10,401 --> 00:10:12,320 Letterman, home base. 268 00:10:12,361 --> 00:10:14,113 Leno, home base. 269 00:10:14,155 --> 00:10:17,033 So I fly to LA, and I've got some money in my pocket, 270 00:10:17,074 --> 00:10:20,494 and I--I land, and I say to the cab driver, 271 00:10:20,536 --> 00:10:22,496 "Take me to the Sunset Strip." 272 00:10:22,538 --> 00:10:23,664 And he said, "How much money you got?" 273 00:10:23,706 --> 00:10:25,458 and I said, "I got 50 bucks." 274 00:10:25,499 --> 00:10:27,793 So he drops me at Western and Sunset, 275 00:10:27,835 --> 00:10:30,004 which is, like, nine miles from here, you know? 276 00:10:30,046 --> 00:10:31,714 Now I have, like, 20 bucks left, 277 00:10:31,756 --> 00:10:33,299 so I walk, like, nine miles, 278 00:10:33,341 --> 00:10:35,217 and I get here. I don't know anybody. 279 00:10:35,259 --> 00:10:37,637 I mean, I knew some comics, kind of, a little bit. 280 00:10:37,678 --> 00:10:39,639 And for the first week, I slept on the back stairs 281 00:10:39,680 --> 00:10:40,890 here at The Comedy Store. 282 00:10:40,931 --> 00:10:42,975 I'd just go back there and lie down, 283 00:10:43,017 --> 00:10:44,101 roll up my jacket... [snores] 284 00:10:44,143 --> 00:10:45,686 ...you know, wake up in the morning. 285 00:10:45,728 --> 00:10:47,188 But I was in show business! 286 00:10:47,229 --> 00:10:49,190 [Anderson] I think that we had a fraternity. 287 00:10:49,231 --> 00:10:51,609 We were completely absorbed by comedy. 288 00:10:51,651 --> 00:10:52,860 I didn't think about anything else, 289 00:10:52,902 --> 00:10:55,112 except maybe the Popeye's chicken 290 00:10:55,154 --> 00:10:56,697 or other chicken. 291 00:10:56,739 --> 00:10:59,659 [Binder] When we got out here, Mitzi was basically a mom 292 00:10:59,700 --> 00:11:01,035 with three kids at home... 293 00:11:01,077 --> 00:11:02,828 - Yeah. - ...and a son 294 00:11:02,870 --> 00:11:05,498 that had graduated college, 295 00:11:05,539 --> 00:11:07,416 and she was running a nightclub, 296 00:11:07,458 --> 00:11:09,794 and she loved comedians. 297 00:11:09,835 --> 00:11:12,922 And she was funny as hell, and she loved to laugh. 298 00:11:12,963 --> 00:11:15,174 How does it feel to be the lady who's responsible 299 00:11:15,216 --> 00:11:17,426 for Jimmie Walker, David Letterman, 300 00:11:17,468 --> 00:11:19,762 Robin Williams--I mean, you give these guys 301 00:11:19,804 --> 00:11:21,347 a gym to work out in. 302 00:11:21,389 --> 00:11:25,017 How does it feel to see these guys come through? 303 00:11:25,059 --> 00:11:27,478 They're... come on, Arsenio. 304 00:11:27,520 --> 00:11:28,854 Give me a better question. 305 00:11:28,896 --> 00:11:30,189 [laughs] Okay, okay. 306 00:11:30,231 --> 00:11:32,400 What kind of coat is that you're wearing? 307 00:11:32,441 --> 00:11:33,859 [laughs] 308 00:11:33,901 --> 00:11:36,362 She would look at you on open mic night, 309 00:11:36,404 --> 00:11:38,114 and all she would do is just look at you 310 00:11:38,155 --> 00:11:39,865 for your charisma on stage. 311 00:11:39,907 --> 00:11:41,992 She didn't care a bit about your jokes. 312 00:11:42,034 --> 00:11:43,703 She was honest about what she felt. 313 00:11:43,744 --> 00:11:45,204 That's the one thing that I appreciate. 314 00:11:45,246 --> 00:11:46,872 If she didn't like you, she just told you 315 00:11:46,914 --> 00:11:48,165 she didn't like you. You know? 316 00:11:48,207 --> 00:11:49,709 There was no beating around the bush. 317 00:11:49,750 --> 00:11:51,544 It was [nasally] "I don't like him. 318 00:11:51,585 --> 00:11:53,379 I like her. She's weird." 319 00:11:53,421 --> 00:11:55,131 - [Binder] Yeah. - And you have to be. 320 00:11:55,172 --> 00:11:57,007 This doesn't happen without honesty. 321 00:11:57,049 --> 00:11:58,634 I wanna take you to Mitzi's office. 322 00:11:58,676 --> 00:12:01,429 No one has been in there since about 2008. 323 00:12:01,470 --> 00:12:02,680 She walked in there 324 00:12:02,722 --> 00:12:04,223 the last time she set her pen down, 325 00:12:04,265 --> 00:12:06,016 and they locked the door, and no one goes in there. 326 00:12:06,058 --> 00:12:07,184 [Maron] It's like Capone's vault. 327 00:12:07,226 --> 00:12:08,394 We don't know what's in there. 328 00:12:08,436 --> 00:12:09,603 And with--those were never up. 329 00:12:09,645 --> 00:12:10,855 No, they were never up. 330 00:12:10,896 --> 00:12:12,815 It was always dark and red in here. 331 00:12:12,857 --> 00:12:13,816 Oh, look at her. 332 00:12:13,858 --> 00:12:15,359 That's me, Argus, Mitzi, 333 00:12:15,401 --> 00:12:16,485 and Lotus Weinstock. 334 00:12:16,527 --> 00:12:17,737 [Maron] Oh, Lotus! 335 00:12:17,778 --> 00:12:19,572 [Binder] Look at this. Pryor Offenses. 336 00:12:19,613 --> 00:12:21,323 It's a pilot that Richard Pryor wrote. 337 00:12:21,365 --> 00:12:25,077 Look, this is the crystal ball she used to curse all of us. 338 00:12:25,119 --> 00:12:28,247 "Maron will never become a big comic 339 00:12:28,289 --> 00:12:31,292 unless he completely loses everything." 340 00:12:31,333 --> 00:12:33,377 She'd come up here on Mondays, and she'd write the... 341 00:12:33,419 --> 00:12:34,879 - Schedule, yeah. - ...the schedule. 342 00:12:34,920 --> 00:12:36,672 - For the week. - And she took it so serious. 343 00:12:36,714 --> 00:12:39,258 Let's start Karen Snow. 344 00:12:39,300 --> 00:12:41,552 9:10, Dave Duggan. 345 00:12:41,594 --> 00:12:43,429 and have Sparky the last up, see? 346 00:12:43,471 --> 00:12:45,473 [Maron] Why did it become such a big deal? 347 00:12:45,514 --> 00:12:47,224 What makes the Store such a-- 348 00:12:47,266 --> 00:12:49,935 a big deal in--you know, initially? 349 00:12:49,977 --> 00:12:51,353 Was it just being on Sunset? 350 00:12:51,395 --> 00:12:54,774 Well, no, actually, what really made the Store huge 351 00:12:54,815 --> 00:12:56,400 was--was a guy in New York. 352 00:12:56,442 --> 00:12:58,110 - [Maron] Yeah. - Kind of a middle-aged guy. 353 00:12:58,152 --> 00:13:00,404 Had a--had a midlife crisis, 354 00:13:00,446 --> 00:13:02,156 and he wanted to move to California, 355 00:13:02,198 --> 00:13:04,033 sit on the beach, and go to parties, 356 00:13:04,074 --> 00:13:07,536 so he moved his talk show to California, to Burbank, 357 00:13:07,578 --> 00:13:09,371 and his name was Johnny Carson. 358 00:13:09,413 --> 00:13:11,332 [fanfare playing] 359 00:13:11,373 --> 00:13:13,125 [announcer] From New York, the world's fair city, 360 00:13:13,167 --> 00:13:15,586 The Tonight Show Starring Johnny Carson. 361 00:13:15,628 --> 00:13:17,213 [Mandel] The litmus test for being a comedian, 362 00:13:17,254 --> 00:13:18,798 a professional comedian in our day and age 363 00:13:18,839 --> 00:13:19,799 was The Tonight Show. 364 00:13:19,840 --> 00:13:21,801 You can't describe 365 00:13:21,842 --> 00:13:23,969 what it was like in 1975. 366 00:13:24,011 --> 00:13:25,346 Wherever you went in America, 367 00:13:25,387 --> 00:13:26,931 people say, "What do you do for a living?" 368 00:13:26,972 --> 00:13:28,182 Say, "I'm a stand-up comedian." 369 00:13:28,224 --> 00:13:30,059 The next question out of their mouth... 370 00:13:30,100 --> 00:13:31,602 They go, "Were you on Johnny Carson ?" 371 00:13:31,644 --> 00:13:33,270 There were a lot of people who lived in New York 372 00:13:33,312 --> 00:13:36,482 because that's how you got on, uh, The Tonight Show. 373 00:13:36,524 --> 00:13:38,901 In 1972, it moved out here to the West Coast. 374 00:13:38,943 --> 00:13:41,612 The Comedy Store opened up 375 00:13:41,654 --> 00:13:43,322 right around that same time. 376 00:13:43,364 --> 00:13:46,075 Wasn't long after when Mitzi took over this place. 377 00:13:46,116 --> 00:13:47,827 All the coordinators came here. 378 00:13:47,868 --> 00:13:49,662 This next gentleman has been the, uh-- 379 00:13:49,703 --> 00:13:51,997 the emcee or the host comedian for the past couple of years 380 00:13:52,039 --> 00:13:53,165 at a place called The Comedy Store. 381 00:13:53,207 --> 00:13:55,292 And they would hear that. You know. 382 00:13:55,334 --> 00:13:58,671 "Ah, the Carson show, Comedy Store in Los Angeles. 383 00:13:58,712 --> 00:14:00,297 I gotta go there." 384 00:14:00,339 --> 00:14:01,507 [Carson] You're in a good mood for comedy tonight. 385 00:14:01,549 --> 00:14:03,008 Would you welcome, please, Argus Hamilton? 386 00:14:03,050 --> 00:14:04,510 - Argus? - [applause] 387 00:14:04,552 --> 00:14:06,011 [Hamilton] I'm sitting there in Norman, Oklahoma, 388 00:14:06,053 --> 00:14:07,763 and it dawns on me like the light 389 00:14:07,805 --> 00:14:10,975 hitting Saul on the road to Damascus. 390 00:14:11,016 --> 00:14:12,434 I'm not gonna have to go to New York. 391 00:14:12,476 --> 00:14:14,019 As I drove out here to California, 392 00:14:14,061 --> 00:14:15,062 I knew I was here to stay. 393 00:14:15,104 --> 00:14:16,355 I saw it on the state border. 394 00:14:16,397 --> 00:14:18,190 The sign said, "Welcome to California. 395 00:14:18,232 --> 00:14:20,901 Do not back up. Severe tire damage." 396 00:14:20,943 --> 00:14:23,195 You know, why most of us came out here 397 00:14:23,237 --> 00:14:25,906 was because Carson moved out here. 398 00:14:25,948 --> 00:14:27,408 So I said, "Let me get in the car 399 00:14:27,449 --> 00:14:30,703 and drive out to California and go to The Comedy Store. 400 00:14:30,744 --> 00:14:32,037 I heard about it on TV." 401 00:14:32,079 --> 00:14:33,706 I didn't even have an image 402 00:14:33,747 --> 00:14:37,585 of what a store of comedy would look like. 403 00:14:37,626 --> 00:14:38,919 I came out here almost on a whim. 404 00:14:38,961 --> 00:14:40,462 I didn't think I'd stay. 405 00:14:40,504 --> 00:14:42,256 But I knew about The Comedy Store. 406 00:14:42,298 --> 00:14:44,550 And I knew, also, if you were successful, 407 00:14:44,592 --> 00:14:46,886 the next stop was The Tonight Show. 408 00:14:46,927 --> 00:14:50,222 There had been this sort of invisible migration 409 00:14:50,264 --> 00:14:51,974 of class clowns. 410 00:14:52,016 --> 00:14:53,392 [Letterman] The Comedy Store became 411 00:14:53,434 --> 00:14:54,810 like AAA baseball. 412 00:14:54,852 --> 00:14:56,228 You know, the Indianapolis Indians 413 00:14:56,270 --> 00:14:57,980 used to be affiliated with the Cleveland Indians, 414 00:14:58,022 --> 00:14:59,565 and it was like The Comedy Store 415 00:14:59,607 --> 00:15:00,733 and The Tonight Show. 416 00:15:00,774 --> 00:15:02,151 We have a new young comedian with us tonight, 417 00:15:02,192 --> 00:15:03,777 and this gentleman-- his name is Freddie Prinze. 418 00:15:03,819 --> 00:15:04,945 He's just 19 years old. 419 00:15:04,987 --> 00:15:06,238 Would you welcome Freddie Prinze? 420 00:15:06,280 --> 00:15:07,489 [Dark] When Freddie Prinze came out 421 00:15:07,531 --> 00:15:09,116 and he did that first Tonight Show, 422 00:15:09,158 --> 00:15:11,368 it just shocked us all, because it-- 423 00:15:11,410 --> 00:15:14,121 it just stamped him as being a star. 424 00:15:14,163 --> 00:15:16,457 I come from two backgrounds, Hungarian and Puerto Rican. 425 00:15:16,498 --> 00:15:18,417 - [audience member cheers] - [cheers] 426 00:15:18,459 --> 00:15:19,960 I'm a Hunga-rican. 427 00:15:20,002 --> 00:15:22,838 [laughter] 428 00:15:22,880 --> 00:15:25,424 It's like a very heavy title, 'cause I could never figure out 429 00:15:25,466 --> 00:15:27,718 how my parents met, a Gypsy and a Puerto Rican. 430 00:15:27,760 --> 00:15:28,677 I asked my mother. 431 00:15:28,719 --> 00:15:29,845 She said they were on the subway, 432 00:15:29,887 --> 00:15:31,889 trying to pick each other's pocket. 433 00:15:31,931 --> 00:15:33,933 Most people think all we do is stand on street corners, 434 00:15:33,974 --> 00:15:36,769 going [makes kissing noise] "Hey, baby! 435 00:15:36,810 --> 00:15:39,229 [heavily accented] What, you can't talk with me? 436 00:15:39,271 --> 00:15:40,898 I don't need you if you conceited." 437 00:15:40,940 --> 00:15:42,733 You know. 438 00:15:42,775 --> 00:15:44,610 [Leno] Sammy Davis was on the panel, 439 00:15:44,652 --> 00:15:47,279 and Sammy was like the greatest audience member. 440 00:15:47,321 --> 00:15:49,782 I mean, literally-- I mean, pounding the table, 441 00:15:49,823 --> 00:15:52,451 "Call that brother over." You know, and he sits down, 442 00:15:52,493 --> 00:15:54,912 and he literally became an overnight sensation. 443 00:15:54,954 --> 00:15:56,080 [Carson] You're gonna do fine, really. 444 00:15:56,121 --> 00:15:57,498 A lot of people started on this show, 445 00:15:57,539 --> 00:15:59,291 and you can always sense when there's something there 446 00:15:59,333 --> 00:16:00,918 that the audience likes them right away. 447 00:16:00,960 --> 00:16:03,754 Johnny Carson was like the law of comedy. 448 00:16:03,796 --> 00:16:05,881 He said, "This is the way it is, 449 00:16:05,923 --> 00:16:07,633 this is the way it's gonna be," 450 00:16:07,675 --> 00:16:10,844 and everybody--Carlin, Richard, 451 00:16:10,886 --> 00:16:13,263 Steve Martin, Albert Brooks-- 452 00:16:13,305 --> 00:16:14,640 they all got in line. 453 00:16:14,682 --> 00:16:16,558 Time for the news. I'm Gary Mule Deer. 454 00:16:16,600 --> 00:16:19,478 These are some of the stories making tonight's headlines. 455 00:16:19,520 --> 00:16:21,146 Elizabeth Taylor went off her diet today 456 00:16:21,188 --> 00:16:22,481 and devoured the centerpiece 457 00:16:22,523 --> 00:16:24,650 at a Democratic fundraiser in Cleveland. 458 00:16:24,692 --> 00:16:27,319 And Chrysler blows the whole check in Las Vegas. 459 00:16:27,361 --> 00:16:29,530 Those stories in a moment. 460 00:16:29,571 --> 00:16:31,490 Hi. 461 00:16:31,532 --> 00:16:32,574 You guys are great. 462 00:16:32,616 --> 00:16:35,035 I don't ever want to forget this show. 463 00:16:35,077 --> 00:16:37,204 Incredible. 464 00:16:39,790 --> 00:16:42,001 David Brenner always said to me, 465 00:16:42,042 --> 00:16:44,211 "When you go on and do that 5 1/2 minutes, 466 00:16:44,253 --> 00:16:46,922 it'll be like selling out The Comedy Store 467 00:16:46,964 --> 00:16:49,174 three shows a night for 50 years. 468 00:16:49,216 --> 00:16:50,801 That's how many people are gonna be watching you, 469 00:16:50,843 --> 00:16:53,303 so you better fucking take every shot seriously." 470 00:16:53,345 --> 00:16:56,056 This became the hottest place in the world in the '70s. 471 00:16:56,098 --> 00:16:58,267 Comedy was the rock and roll of the '70s. 472 00:16:58,308 --> 00:16:59,935 Every night, somebody was getting discovered. 473 00:16:59,977 --> 00:17:01,812 Would you welcome him, please, on his first appearance? 474 00:17:01,854 --> 00:17:02,730 Tom Dreesen. 475 00:17:02,771 --> 00:17:05,983 [upbeat music playing] 476 00:17:06,025 --> 00:17:07,067 Would you welcome Mr. David Brenner? 477 00:17:07,109 --> 00:17:08,277 When I first did television, 478 00:17:08,318 --> 00:17:09,486 which was this show... 479 00:17:09,528 --> 00:17:10,863 Every comedian 480 00:17:10,904 --> 00:17:12,489 remembers their birthday 481 00:17:12,531 --> 00:17:14,450 and the first time they did The Tonight Show. 482 00:17:14,491 --> 00:17:16,285 Now I'm sitting on a subway, and I'm all excited. 483 00:17:16,326 --> 00:17:17,661 The night before, I was on The Tonight Show. 484 00:17:17,703 --> 00:17:19,580 You know, I'm real excited. I'm sitting there. 485 00:17:19,621 --> 00:17:22,708 And a man seated across from me looks at me, 486 00:17:22,750 --> 00:17:24,043 and he goes like this. He looks at me. 487 00:17:24,084 --> 00:17:26,879 He goes, "Ooh. 488 00:17:26,920 --> 00:17:29,465 You're funny." 489 00:17:29,506 --> 00:17:31,258 And I said, "Thank you," you know, real loud 490 00:17:31,300 --> 00:17:32,801 so everyone in the car could hear me 491 00:17:32,843 --> 00:17:33,844 because come on, I was proud. 492 00:17:33,886 --> 00:17:34,803 The man saw me the night before 493 00:17:34,845 --> 00:17:35,679 on The Tonight Show, 494 00:17:35,721 --> 00:17:37,473 and he recognized me. 495 00:17:37,514 --> 00:17:39,349 And then, about a minute later, he turned 496 00:17:39,391 --> 00:17:40,976 to the woman next to me, and he said to her, 497 00:17:41,018 --> 00:17:43,103 "Ooh, you're funny." 498 00:17:43,145 --> 00:17:45,606 [laughter] 499 00:17:45,647 --> 00:17:47,357 [applause] 500 00:17:47,399 --> 00:17:51,195 I swear, he said it to everyone in the train, 501 00:17:51,236 --> 00:17:52,654 and I was, like, the only idiot 502 00:17:52,696 --> 00:17:54,573 who stood up and said, "Thank you very much." 503 00:17:54,615 --> 00:17:56,533 [Dreesen] You told your whole family, all the papers 504 00:17:56,575 --> 00:17:58,202 back home are writing about you, you're gonna make 505 00:17:58,243 --> 00:17:59,369 your first appearance on The Tonight Show. 506 00:17:59,411 --> 00:18:03,415 I was so scared, I didn't even look over at him. 507 00:18:03,457 --> 00:18:05,876 Everybody said, "Oh, you should've looked at him, 508 00:18:05,918 --> 00:18:08,337 'cause he would've called you over to sit on the panel," 509 00:18:08,378 --> 00:18:10,380 but, uh, I looked the other way 510 00:18:10,422 --> 00:18:12,758 and got out of there as fast as I could. 511 00:18:12,800 --> 00:18:15,177 My grandfather was an aviation pioneer. 512 00:18:15,219 --> 00:18:18,597 He was the first luggage clerk. 513 00:18:18,639 --> 00:18:22,434 He was the guy in Paris who lost Lindbergh's luggage. 514 00:18:22,476 --> 00:18:24,561 [laughter] 515 00:18:24,603 --> 00:18:27,439 Tried to tell Lindbergh it was on a different flight. 516 00:18:28,649 --> 00:18:31,568 [upbeat music playing] 517 00:18:34,071 --> 00:18:35,697 The point to remember here is, though I love to drive, 518 00:18:35,739 --> 00:18:37,407 I just hate to stop, 519 00:18:37,449 --> 00:18:39,326 especially for pedestrians. 520 00:18:39,368 --> 00:18:40,702 But I do have a great solution. 521 00:18:40,744 --> 00:18:42,913 I find that if you just tie some torn clothing 522 00:18:42,955 --> 00:18:45,249 to your front bumper... 523 00:18:45,290 --> 00:18:47,584 - [chuckles] - [laughter, applause] 524 00:18:47,626 --> 00:18:50,170 You can fairly breeze through town. 525 00:18:50,212 --> 00:18:51,755 We'll be back. 526 00:18:51,797 --> 00:18:53,298 I couldn't believe 527 00:18:53,340 --> 00:18:56,301 that I didn't stumble or fall down or... 528 00:18:56,343 --> 00:18:59,179 people just have no idea, the pressure. 529 00:18:59,221 --> 00:19:00,389 And I can't tell you how many times 530 00:19:00,430 --> 00:19:01,932 Jim McCawley, who was the booker, 531 00:19:01,974 --> 00:19:03,392 showed up here, saw me, 532 00:19:03,433 --> 00:19:05,310 not only told me I wouldn't get the show-- 533 00:19:05,352 --> 00:19:07,271 he said, "You will never get the show. 534 00:19:07,312 --> 00:19:10,315 What you do, Howie, is not Johnny's cup of tea." 535 00:19:10,357 --> 00:19:11,775 I love the comics on The Tonight Show. 536 00:19:11,817 --> 00:19:12,901 I love The Tonight Show. 537 00:19:12,943 --> 00:19:14,444 I did everything I was supposed to do, 538 00:19:14,486 --> 00:19:16,113 and I got said no to... 539 00:19:16,155 --> 00:19:18,157 you can't get said no to more times. 540 00:19:18,198 --> 00:19:19,491 Jim McCawley didn't like me. 541 00:19:19,533 --> 00:19:21,410 He said to me a really hurtful thing. 542 00:19:21,451 --> 00:19:22,995 "You know, you're not Tonight Show material." 543 00:19:23,036 --> 00:19:24,121 [Binder] And he was so wrong. 544 00:19:24,163 --> 00:19:25,205 Would you welcome, please, 545 00:19:25,247 --> 00:19:26,874 Louie Anderson. Louie? 546 00:19:26,915 --> 00:19:30,085 [band music playing] 547 00:19:30,502 --> 00:19:32,796 Thank you, everyone. Thank you, everyone. 548 00:19:32,838 --> 00:19:34,965 I can't stay long. I'm in between meals, 549 00:19:35,007 --> 00:19:38,385 so bear with me. 550 00:19:38,427 --> 00:19:40,512 People say, "Louie, why do you do those fat jokes?" 551 00:19:40,554 --> 00:19:42,097 'Cause if I didn't, you guys would sit out there 552 00:19:42,139 --> 00:19:44,183 and go, "You think he knows he's that big?" 553 00:19:44,224 --> 00:19:46,685 [laughter] 554 00:19:46,727 --> 00:19:49,563 Like I woke up one morning... "Oh, no." 555 00:19:50,814 --> 00:19:52,900 That's a funny young kid. 556 00:19:52,941 --> 00:19:54,902 Louie, come on out here and take another bow. 557 00:19:54,943 --> 00:19:56,111 Thank you very much. 558 00:19:56,153 --> 00:19:58,322 [cheers and applause] 559 00:19:58,363 --> 00:19:59,656 [Carson] Now, we originally offered Byron 560 00:19:59,698 --> 00:20:01,950 a shot on The Tonight Show last February, 561 00:20:01,992 --> 00:20:03,285 and he turned it down. 562 00:20:03,327 --> 00:20:04,494 He said he couldn't make it that night 563 00:20:04,536 --> 00:20:05,621 'cause he had to do his homework. 564 00:20:05,662 --> 00:20:07,039 True story. 565 00:20:07,080 --> 00:20:08,957 So make him feel welcome, would you? 566 00:20:08,999 --> 00:20:10,083 Byron Allen. 567 00:20:10,125 --> 00:20:12,461 [upbeat music playing] 568 00:20:12,502 --> 00:20:13,921 [Walker] I always hire writers. 569 00:20:13,962 --> 00:20:15,297 They were all--not struggling, 570 00:20:15,339 --> 00:20:16,423 but they needed cash. 571 00:20:16,465 --> 00:20:19,384 The first show that I sold him was, uh, 572 00:20:19,426 --> 00:20:20,636 the difference between white people 573 00:20:20,677 --> 00:20:22,387 and black people when they go to a movie. 574 00:20:22,429 --> 00:20:24,389 If white people don't like it, they're very polite. 575 00:20:24,431 --> 00:20:26,225 "I'm not gonna recommend this to my friends." 576 00:20:26,266 --> 00:20:27,351 Black people are like... 577 00:20:27,392 --> 00:20:29,269 "This movie was a bunch of jive!" 578 00:20:29,311 --> 00:20:32,397 You know. "Give me everybody's money back!" 579 00:20:32,439 --> 00:20:33,941 [Walker] He gets to Tonight Show, 580 00:20:33,982 --> 00:20:36,401 and he calls me, and he says, 581 00:20:36,443 --> 00:20:39,404 "I need my joke back." [laughs] 582 00:20:39,446 --> 00:20:41,865 I got out here, and I talked George Miller 583 00:20:41,907 --> 00:20:43,242 into buying a joke off me. 584 00:20:43,283 --> 00:20:44,618 What was the joke? 585 00:20:44,660 --> 00:20:46,578 I went to a really drug-oriented high school, 586 00:20:46,620 --> 00:20:47,579 High High. 587 00:20:47,621 --> 00:20:49,456 - [laughs] - Okay? 588 00:20:49,498 --> 00:20:52,251 It's just an awful joke, but he gave me 25 bucks. 589 00:20:52,292 --> 00:20:53,627 Yeah. It's not an awful joke, 590 00:20:53,669 --> 00:20:56,088 because that's where George lived. 591 00:20:56,129 --> 00:20:57,673 You know. A cow on speed. 592 00:20:57,714 --> 00:20:59,341 Can you imagine a cow on speed? 593 00:20:59,383 --> 00:21:00,968 That'd be neat, huh? A cow on speed. 594 00:21:01,009 --> 00:21:02,844 Moo-moo-moo-moo- moo-moo-moo. 595 00:21:03,178 --> 00:21:05,472 - I was two weeks out here. - Yeah. 596 00:21:05,514 --> 00:21:07,766 And he did it on Johnny Carson, 597 00:21:07,808 --> 00:21:10,060 and I was able to call my dad and say, 598 00:21:10,102 --> 00:21:13,355 "Dad, the fourth joke in is my joke." 599 00:21:13,397 --> 00:21:15,274 For you, that-- that must have been huge. 600 00:21:15,315 --> 00:21:16,483 Yeah, it was. 601 00:21:16,525 --> 00:21:17,859 In those days, it was make-or-break. 602 00:21:17,901 --> 00:21:21,363 If you didn't do well on the first Tonight Show, 603 00:21:21,405 --> 00:21:22,656 you could go back to Indiana. 604 00:21:22,698 --> 00:21:24,491 You could go back to Birmingham, Michigan. 605 00:21:24,533 --> 00:21:27,786 You could just, uh, live in the cement river 606 00:21:27,828 --> 00:21:30,539 that runs through LA. That would be it for you. 607 00:21:30,580 --> 00:21:32,291 The kind of thing I'll always remember 608 00:21:32,332 --> 00:21:34,459 as long as I live growing up in Indiana 609 00:21:34,501 --> 00:21:37,087 is when Dad used to tease me with the power tools. 610 00:21:37,129 --> 00:21:38,964 How many of you... 611 00:21:39,006 --> 00:21:40,799 did you have that? 612 00:21:40,841 --> 00:21:42,301 - What a guy. - What a guy. 613 00:21:42,342 --> 00:21:44,678 - Sense of humor, huh? - Yeah. 614 00:21:44,720 --> 00:21:47,055 I have a feeling from your shot on your show tonight, 615 00:21:47,097 --> 00:21:49,141 you're gonna be working a lot outside of The Comedy Store. 616 00:21:49,182 --> 00:21:50,309 Dave loved Johnny. 617 00:21:50,350 --> 00:21:51,810 We'd stand in the back and watch 618 00:21:51,852 --> 00:21:53,812 Dreesen's first Tonight Show, then Dreesen and I watched 619 00:21:53,854 --> 00:21:55,397 his first Tonight Show in the kitchen. 620 00:21:55,439 --> 00:21:56,523 Show business is a tough life, 621 00:21:56,565 --> 00:21:57,816 as some of you know. 622 00:21:57,858 --> 00:21:59,818 So if you liked me and you're Protestant, 623 00:21:59,860 --> 00:22:01,528 do me a favor and say a prayer for me. 624 00:22:01,570 --> 00:22:03,947 If you're Catholic, light a candle. 625 00:22:03,989 --> 00:22:05,157 If you're Jewish, 626 00:22:05,198 --> 00:22:06,408 somebody in your family owns a nightclub. 627 00:22:06,450 --> 00:22:08,201 Tell them about me, will you? 628 00:22:08,243 --> 00:22:09,828 [Binder] I remember watching George Miller 629 00:22:09,870 --> 00:22:11,330 on The Tonight Show in the back. 630 00:22:11,371 --> 00:22:13,332 I remember watching Argus's first Tonight Show. 631 00:22:13,373 --> 00:22:14,541 - Oh, 'cause we all-- - [Binder] It was, like, 632 00:22:14,583 --> 00:22:15,542 a black-and-white TV, wasn't it? 633 00:22:15,584 --> 00:22:16,918 Yeah, absolutely, in the back. 634 00:22:16,960 --> 00:22:18,295 It was a celebration 635 00:22:18,337 --> 00:22:20,255 when one of our guys was on The Tonight Show. 636 00:22:20,297 --> 00:22:22,257 And everyone would crowd around 637 00:22:22,299 --> 00:22:24,134 and count all the laughter 638 00:22:24,176 --> 00:22:26,094 and the applause breaks. 639 00:22:26,136 --> 00:22:27,596 It made everybody wanna... 640 00:22:27,637 --> 00:22:29,431 "Gotta get on it! Gotta get on Johnny !" 641 00:22:29,473 --> 00:22:30,682 [Mandel] Joan Rivers 642 00:22:30,724 --> 00:22:32,601 was filling in for Johnny Carson, 643 00:22:32,642 --> 00:22:35,395 and before she did The Tonight Show every week, 644 00:22:35,437 --> 00:22:37,022 she would come here to The Comedy Store 645 00:22:37,064 --> 00:22:39,358 like everybody did, including Johnny himself. 646 00:22:39,399 --> 00:22:41,318 Before he was playing, he would work out his act 647 00:22:41,360 --> 00:22:42,819 in this room to go to Vegas. 648 00:22:42,861 --> 00:22:44,529 And I said, "Mitzi, when's Joan coming in? 649 00:22:44,571 --> 00:22:46,281 and she goes, "She's gonna go on at nine." 650 00:22:46,323 --> 00:22:47,574 And I said to Mitzi, 651 00:22:47,616 --> 00:22:49,284 "Is there any way that you can put me on, 652 00:22:49,326 --> 00:22:51,453 like, at 8:45 or 8:50?" 653 00:22:51,495 --> 00:22:53,372 And she said, "Yeah, I'll do that for you." 654 00:22:53,413 --> 00:22:55,499 I'm walking back, and Joan passes me, 655 00:22:55,540 --> 00:22:57,709 and she says, "Very funny, young man." 656 00:22:57,751 --> 00:22:59,336 So I did my very first Tonight Show 657 00:22:59,378 --> 00:23:00,712 with Joan Rivers. 658 00:23:00,754 --> 00:23:01,588 [laughter] 659 00:23:01,630 --> 00:23:03,298 Okay, how many-- how many fingers 660 00:23:03,340 --> 00:23:05,634 am I holding up? 661 00:23:05,675 --> 00:23:08,428 The next day, I got a call from McCawley. 662 00:23:08,470 --> 00:23:10,722 Johnny Carson had been watching the show, 663 00:23:10,764 --> 00:23:12,057 and he loved me, 664 00:23:12,099 --> 00:23:14,393 and he asked me to come on two weeks later. 665 00:23:14,434 --> 00:23:16,144 Guess who this is. Guess who this is. 666 00:23:16,186 --> 00:23:17,396 Take one guess. 667 00:23:17,437 --> 00:23:18,397 Ricardo Montalbán. 668 00:23:18,438 --> 00:23:20,107 No. It's me. 669 00:23:20,148 --> 00:23:21,233 It's Howie. 670 00:23:21,274 --> 00:23:22,984 [laughter] 671 00:23:23,026 --> 00:23:25,904 upbeat music 672 00:23:25,946 --> 00:23:29,908 And I did it 22 times with Johnny Carson, 673 00:23:29,950 --> 00:23:31,284 and that made my career, 674 00:23:31,326 --> 00:23:32,577 and that would not have happened 675 00:23:32,619 --> 00:23:34,913 without Mitzi, without Joan, 676 00:23:34,955 --> 00:23:36,456 and without this room. 677 00:23:38,291 --> 00:23:39,459 [Binder] There were two things 678 00:23:39,501 --> 00:23:40,919 that made The Comedy Store blow up: 679 00:23:40,961 --> 00:23:42,921 The Tonight Show and Jimmie Walker. 680 00:23:42,963 --> 00:23:44,631 [Walker] She has a figure that makes the number eight 681 00:23:44,673 --> 00:23:45,924 look like the number one, 682 00:23:45,966 --> 00:23:49,219 and a smile that lights up the night, 683 00:23:49,261 --> 00:23:53,140 and it all belongs to Kid... [claps] Dyn-o-mite! 684 00:23:53,181 --> 00:23:54,599 [laughter, applause] 685 00:23:54,641 --> 00:23:56,184 [Baum] Jimmie Walker was the first one 686 00:23:56,226 --> 00:23:58,687 that allowed Mitzi to put his name up on the marquee. 687 00:23:58,728 --> 00:24:00,188 Freddie Prinze would never let her 688 00:24:00,230 --> 00:24:01,898 put his name on the marquee 'cause he said, 689 00:24:01,940 --> 00:24:03,525 "Well, if people could see me here for five bucks, 690 00:24:03,567 --> 00:24:05,735 why are they gonna pay 50 to see me in Las Vegas?" 691 00:24:05,777 --> 00:24:07,404 When they put his name out there on that marquee, 692 00:24:07,446 --> 00:24:08,738 people would line up. 693 00:24:08,780 --> 00:24:10,282 The place was packed all the time. 694 00:24:10,323 --> 00:24:12,159 The place went crazy. 695 00:24:12,200 --> 00:24:13,618 And he'd come in with his writers, 696 00:24:13,660 --> 00:24:15,495 which were David Letterman and, you know, Jay Leno 697 00:24:15,537 --> 00:24:16,371 - and Gino... - [Binder] Byron? 698 00:24:16,413 --> 00:24:17,414 [Dark] ...and Byron Allen. 699 00:24:17,456 --> 00:24:18,623 [Allen] I'd get a phone call, 700 00:24:18,665 --> 00:24:20,584 and on the other end of the phone, this-- 701 00:24:20,625 --> 00:24:22,127 all of a sudden, I hear this guy. 702 00:24:22,169 --> 00:24:24,421 He goes, "Is this Byron? 703 00:24:24,463 --> 00:24:26,131 I go, "Yeah, this is Byron." 704 00:24:26,173 --> 00:24:27,424 He goes, 705 00:24:27,466 --> 00:24:29,843 "This is Jimmie JJ Walker." 706 00:24:29,885 --> 00:24:31,720 [Binder] This is after you-- one time on stage? 707 00:24:31,761 --> 00:24:33,096 - One time on stage. - [Binder] That's amazing. 708 00:24:33,138 --> 00:24:34,014 Right? One time. 709 00:24:34,055 --> 00:24:34,931 The place is magical. 710 00:24:34,973 --> 00:24:36,308 Right? The place is magical. 711 00:24:36,349 --> 00:24:40,020 So he goes, "My man Wayne Kline says you're funny, 712 00:24:40,061 --> 00:24:42,272 and if my man Wayne Kline says you're funny, 713 00:24:42,314 --> 00:24:43,523 then you're funny. 714 00:24:43,565 --> 00:24:45,525 Do you want to come and hang out with us?" 715 00:24:45,567 --> 00:24:48,195 I said, "Yeah, let me ask my mother." 716 00:24:48,236 --> 00:24:49,613 [laughs] 717 00:24:49,654 --> 00:24:51,573 The reason I got guys to write for me 718 00:24:51,615 --> 00:24:53,742 is because I did see a lot of good guys 719 00:24:53,783 --> 00:24:56,828 that I felt maybe were a little more talented than me, 720 00:24:56,870 --> 00:24:59,623 and I needed to get a little better. 721 00:24:59,664 --> 00:25:01,041 We have what we call writer's meetings 722 00:25:01,082 --> 00:25:03,585 or just skull sessions where we sit around, 723 00:25:03,627 --> 00:25:05,670 like, five of us, and go over ideas. 724 00:25:05,712 --> 00:25:07,380 But now, for instance, you can 725 00:25:07,422 --> 00:25:09,299 occasionally get them jobs. 726 00:25:09,341 --> 00:25:10,967 Oh, yes! Oh, definitely! 727 00:25:11,009 --> 00:25:12,302 Definitely, yeah. 728 00:25:12,344 --> 00:25:14,179 That's what I see on the plateau that I'm at. 729 00:25:14,221 --> 00:25:17,140 I'm at a more job-getting level than they are right now. 730 00:25:17,182 --> 00:25:18,600 Had a cat outside the club walk up to me. 731 00:25:18,642 --> 00:25:21,394 He said, "Jim, I only got three dollars to my name. 732 00:25:21,436 --> 00:25:22,854 What should I do?" 733 00:25:22,896 --> 00:25:25,106 I said, "Change your name." 734 00:25:25,148 --> 00:25:26,858 [Goldberg] Every star you can imagine 735 00:25:26,900 --> 00:25:27,901 walked through that door. 736 00:25:27,943 --> 00:25:30,862 Writers and actors and comics. 737 00:25:30,904 --> 00:25:32,739 [Walker] One night, I'm on stage, 738 00:25:32,781 --> 00:25:36,243 and there's this table that's just going insane. 739 00:25:36,284 --> 00:25:37,994 This guy was so loud. 740 00:25:38,036 --> 00:25:41,039 I finally had to go after this guy. 741 00:25:41,081 --> 00:25:42,541 I love you too! 742 00:25:42,582 --> 00:25:43,875 So I'm hitting him and hitting him, 743 00:25:43,917 --> 00:25:46,086 doing jokes, attacking the guy. 744 00:25:46,127 --> 00:25:48,046 I found out it's Stephen Stills, 745 00:25:48,088 --> 00:25:50,340 from Crosby, Stills, Nash, and Young. 746 00:25:50,382 --> 00:25:53,260 So I'm doing all sorts of Stephen Stills jokes, 747 00:25:53,301 --> 00:25:55,178 and I'm burying him, and people are looking like, 748 00:25:55,220 --> 00:25:56,805 "Oh, wow, Stephen Stills, yay." 749 00:25:56,846 --> 00:26:00,267 So he's still going on and on and on. 750 00:26:00,308 --> 00:26:04,354 Finally, like a dagger, I hit him with a good line, 751 00:26:04,396 --> 00:26:06,356 and the audience just applauds. 752 00:26:06,398 --> 00:26:08,733 So I figure, "Okay, I'll just go on and do my little jokes." 753 00:26:08,775 --> 00:26:09,985 At the Store in those days, 754 00:26:10,026 --> 00:26:12,070 we had these big, heavy ashtrays 755 00:26:12,112 --> 00:26:13,196 that people would steal, 756 00:26:13,238 --> 00:26:14,739 and they had "Comedy Store" on them. 757 00:26:14,781 --> 00:26:16,575 Out of the corner of my eye, 758 00:26:16,616 --> 00:26:18,868 I spot an object 759 00:26:18,910 --> 00:26:21,621 hurled at me at 90 miles an hour. 760 00:26:21,663 --> 00:26:24,624 I put my hand up, and I barely caught it 761 00:26:24,666 --> 00:26:26,751 right before it hit me in the face. 762 00:26:26,793 --> 00:26:29,129 You know, Jimmie used to sell peanuts 763 00:26:29,170 --> 00:26:30,297 at Yankee Stadium, 764 00:26:30,338 --> 00:26:32,549 so he had that ability to catch and throw. 765 00:26:32,591 --> 00:26:34,175 I finish my show, and I go, 766 00:26:34,217 --> 00:26:37,262 "Where the fuck is this Stephen Stills guy at, man?" 767 00:26:37,304 --> 00:26:41,182 So Stephen Stills, I'm looking for you, brother. 768 00:26:41,683 --> 00:26:43,393 What do you know about Freddie Prinze 769 00:26:43,435 --> 00:26:44,686 and Alan Bursky? 770 00:26:44,728 --> 00:26:47,105 All I knew is that the rumor was that 771 00:26:47,147 --> 00:26:49,774 Freddie Prinze killed himself with Alan Bursky's gun, 772 00:26:49,816 --> 00:26:51,776 and it wasn't that simple, 773 00:26:51,818 --> 00:26:53,111 and they were best friends, 774 00:26:53,153 --> 00:26:55,196 and it was a complicated story. I remember that. 775 00:26:55,238 --> 00:26:57,073 [Prinze] Would you welcome my good friend and roommate, 776 00:26:57,115 --> 00:26:58,283 Alan Bursky? 777 00:26:58,325 --> 00:27:01,911 [applause] 778 00:27:01,953 --> 00:27:03,580 I'm not knocking old people. 779 00:27:03,622 --> 00:27:05,081 I'm not. In fact, we need old people. 780 00:27:05,123 --> 00:27:08,501 We do, because without them, who would feed the pigeons? 781 00:27:08,543 --> 00:27:10,795 Freddie Prinze was, like, a year older than me, 782 00:27:10,837 --> 00:27:12,005 and one day, he calls me. 783 00:27:12,047 --> 00:27:13,298 I don't even know how he got my number. 784 00:27:13,340 --> 00:27:14,633 And we start talking 785 00:27:14,674 --> 00:27:15,967 to each other regularly on the phone. 786 00:27:16,009 --> 00:27:17,469 [Binder] And he'd already done The Tonight Show? 787 00:27:17,510 --> 00:27:19,596 No, he hasn't done it yet. He's gonna do it a month later. 788 00:27:19,638 --> 00:27:20,513 [Binder] And you--but you've done it. 789 00:27:20,555 --> 00:27:21,806 I've done it a couple times. 790 00:27:21,848 --> 00:27:23,350 He came out here, and I'm excited. 791 00:27:23,391 --> 00:27:24,643 I'm gonna meet my new best friend, 792 00:27:24,684 --> 00:27:25,644 Freddie Prinze. 793 00:27:25,685 --> 00:27:26,686 And I'm at the bar. 794 00:27:26,728 --> 00:27:28,563 You know, I'm 18 years old. 795 00:27:28,605 --> 00:27:29,939 This guy comes in. 796 00:27:29,981 --> 00:27:31,858 He literally has two women on his arm. 797 00:27:31,900 --> 00:27:34,736 He's 6'2", and I'm 5'5". 798 00:27:34,778 --> 00:27:36,738 I'm 18. I look 14. 799 00:27:36,780 --> 00:27:40,158 This guy's 19. He looks 35. 800 00:27:40,200 --> 00:27:42,160 He's all dressed up, he's got the women on his arm, 801 00:27:42,202 --> 00:27:43,662 he's got a cigarette in his mouth, 802 00:27:43,703 --> 00:27:45,538 and he's pushing people away from the bar, 803 00:27:45,580 --> 00:27:46,831 and he goes, "Alan!" 804 00:27:46,873 --> 00:27:48,500 And I went, "Who are you?" 805 00:27:48,541 --> 00:27:50,794 "Freddie!" I thought he was Clark Gable. 806 00:27:50,835 --> 00:27:52,337 I expected a kid. 807 00:27:52,379 --> 00:27:53,296 It's like, you ever notice 808 00:27:53,338 --> 00:27:55,548 how ethnic groups react to tragedy? 809 00:27:55,590 --> 00:27:58,510 It's like, English people are so blasé, 810 00:27:58,551 --> 00:28:00,512 they kill me, because, like, 811 00:28:00,553 --> 00:28:03,098 nothing bothers them. You know, you go over to them. 812 00:28:03,139 --> 00:28:05,225 [English accent] "Y--Jeffrey, Mother died." 813 00:28:06,643 --> 00:28:09,187 "Oh, really? 814 00:28:09,229 --> 00:28:12,232 I suppose we'll have to bury her, then, won't we?" 815 00:28:12,273 --> 00:28:14,150 [Dark] We were all enamored with Freddie, 816 00:28:14,192 --> 00:28:16,653 and Alan was amazed with Freddie. 817 00:28:16,695 --> 00:28:18,029 But he also was a kid like Freddie, 818 00:28:18,071 --> 00:28:19,698 so he could talk to him on that level. 819 00:28:19,739 --> 00:28:21,533 Would you welcome, please, Alan Bursky? 820 00:28:21,574 --> 00:28:23,535 [upbeat band music playing] 821 00:28:23,576 --> 00:28:25,203 Are you guys really roommates? 822 00:28:25,245 --> 00:28:27,122 - [sighs] - When I first moved out to LA. 823 00:28:27,163 --> 00:28:28,707 - My little partner. - You know, you want to know 824 00:28:28,748 --> 00:28:29,791 what's really the most annoying thing 825 00:28:29,833 --> 00:28:31,084 about him is? He talks in his sleep. 826 00:28:31,126 --> 00:28:32,711 I mean, he doesn't t-- I take that back. 827 00:28:32,752 --> 00:28:34,254 He doesn't talk in his sleep. He screams. 828 00:28:34,295 --> 00:28:35,380 [laughter] 829 00:28:35,422 --> 00:28:36,715 The first night Freddie moved in, 830 00:28:36,756 --> 00:28:37,882 he says to me, "You have a mirror 831 00:28:37,924 --> 00:28:38,967 and a razor blade?" 832 00:28:39,008 --> 00:28:40,593 So I show him my electric razor. 833 00:28:40,635 --> 00:28:41,761 I said, "No, use this." 834 00:28:41,803 --> 00:28:42,804 He goes, "No, not for that." 835 00:28:42,846 --> 00:28:44,097 I took my Woody Allen, 836 00:28:44,139 --> 00:28:45,640 framed Woody Allen picture, off the wall 837 00:28:45,682 --> 00:28:47,434 and an X-Acto knife. 838 00:28:47,475 --> 00:28:49,811 And I said, "What is that?" He goes, "It's cocaine," 839 00:28:49,853 --> 00:28:51,896 and he starts scooping this and chopping it. 840 00:28:51,938 --> 00:28:53,106 He goes, "You've never done cocaine?" 841 00:28:53,148 --> 00:28:54,566 I said, "I've never seen it." 842 00:28:54,607 --> 00:28:55,775 He gave me a couple of bumps, 843 00:28:55,817 --> 00:28:57,235 I cleaned the apartment, 844 00:28:57,277 --> 00:28:59,237 I tried to polish the air conditioner. 845 00:28:59,279 --> 00:29:01,239 I take care of my uncle's '64 Chevy. 846 00:29:01,281 --> 00:29:03,074 Beautiful condition. 847 00:29:03,116 --> 00:29:05,910 Pom-poms on all the antennas. 848 00:29:05,952 --> 00:29:07,620 Cellophane seat covers, right? 849 00:29:07,662 --> 00:29:08,913 Little dog in the back window 850 00:29:08,955 --> 00:29:10,915 with the head keeps rolling up and down. 851 00:29:10,957 --> 00:29:12,250 [Bursky] Freddie got a TV pilot 852 00:29:12,292 --> 00:29:13,710 September '74. 853 00:29:13,752 --> 00:29:16,588 I got a TV pilot late '74, 854 00:29:16,629 --> 00:29:19,382 How to Succeed in Business Without Really Trying. 855 00:29:19,424 --> 00:29:20,633 Where's the meeting today? 856 00:29:20,675 --> 00:29:22,969 - What meeting? - The big meeting! 857 00:29:23,011 --> 00:29:24,471 - In the big meeting room? - Thanks. 858 00:29:24,512 --> 00:29:26,055 [Bursky] One of the biggest pilots of the year. 859 00:29:26,097 --> 00:29:27,474 It didn't get picked up, obviously. 860 00:29:27,515 --> 00:29:29,434 My life would be very different if it did. 861 00:29:29,476 --> 00:29:33,104 He lived through Freddie for that period of time. 862 00:29:33,146 --> 00:29:36,274 [Bursky] There are people whose energy and personality 863 00:29:36,316 --> 00:29:39,527 are so big, they will just suck it out of you, 864 00:29:39,569 --> 00:29:40,904 and that's what made him a star. 865 00:29:40,945 --> 00:29:43,406 At this time, it gives me great joy and pleasure 866 00:29:43,448 --> 00:29:46,367 - to introduce this next... - [crowd roars] 867 00:29:46,409 --> 00:29:50,163 smooth music 868 00:29:50,205 --> 00:29:51,456 Ooh-la-la! 869 00:29:53,833 --> 00:29:55,668 Looking good! 870 00:29:55,710 --> 00:29:58,963 Freddie Prinze, ladies and gentlemen, Freddie Prinze! 871 00:29:59,005 --> 00:30:00,131 [Walker] Freddie Prinze was on every cover 872 00:30:00,173 --> 00:30:02,383 of all these little teen beat magazines. 873 00:30:02,425 --> 00:30:04,385 What Freddie would do is go over to Cahuenga, 874 00:30:04,427 --> 00:30:06,095 and they had that big newspaper stand, 875 00:30:06,137 --> 00:30:08,890 and they have all these teenybopper magazines, 876 00:30:08,932 --> 00:30:10,975 Teen Beat and Tiger Beat 877 00:30:11,017 --> 00:30:13,061 and Teens on Parade-- whatever they would have, 878 00:30:13,102 --> 00:30:14,354 and he'd stand in front of a magazine 879 00:30:14,395 --> 00:30:16,064 where his picture's on the magazine, 880 00:30:16,105 --> 00:30:17,482 and people would come in there and go, 881 00:30:17,524 --> 00:30:19,859 "Hey, aren't you... 882 00:30:19,901 --> 00:30:21,319 Freddie Prinze?" 883 00:30:21,361 --> 00:30:23,738 "Yeah, I'm here reading, uh, British Weekly. " 884 00:30:25,698 --> 00:30:28,785 "Freddie, could you sign my--my thing?" 885 00:30:28,827 --> 00:30:30,203 "Well, all right, yeah, whatever" 886 00:30:30,245 --> 00:30:31,830 So we'd sign all these things, 887 00:30:31,871 --> 00:30:33,122 and he'd be there, and he'd do a stand-up. 888 00:30:33,164 --> 00:30:36,167 Ba-ba-ba ba-ba-barino 889 00:30:36,209 --> 00:30:38,920 [Walker] The next year, Freddie is off the covers 890 00:30:38,962 --> 00:30:40,171 of every magazine. 891 00:30:40,213 --> 00:30:43,216 Now it is all about John Travolta. 892 00:30:43,258 --> 00:30:46,261 He used to tell me-- he says, "God, Travolta. 893 00:30:46,302 --> 00:30:48,513 My God, Tim," and he'd get really hot about it, you know. 894 00:30:48,555 --> 00:30:50,139 I said, "What's the matter with you, man?" 895 00:30:50,181 --> 00:30:51,558 I said, "The guy-- he's just another actor guy. 896 00:30:51,599 --> 00:30:53,184 Once you get your show, you're a big hit, 897 00:30:53,226 --> 00:30:55,520 you know, you're doubling for Carson. 898 00:30:55,562 --> 00:30:58,356 I mean, you're hanging with Dean Martin and Sammy Man. 899 00:30:58,398 --> 00:31:00,358 I mean, you're-- you know, you're in the club." 900 00:31:00,400 --> 00:31:03,069 But he had this, you know, obsession with Travolta. 901 00:31:03,111 --> 00:31:04,404 [Walker] And he calls me. 902 00:31:04,445 --> 00:31:06,030 "Going to the sporting goods store." 903 00:31:06,072 --> 00:31:08,283 "Sporting goods store? You never work out. 904 00:31:08,324 --> 00:31:09,534 What the hell are you doing at a sporting goods store?" 905 00:31:09,576 --> 00:31:10,493 "You'll see." 906 00:31:10,535 --> 00:31:11,953 Freddie goes in. He buys 907 00:31:11,995 --> 00:31:13,955 a high-powered bow and arrow. 908 00:31:13,997 --> 00:31:15,540 - [Binder] Like a crossbow? - Yes. 909 00:31:15,582 --> 00:31:18,668 He says, "We gotta kill John Travolta." 910 00:31:18,710 --> 00:31:20,086 - [Binder laughs] - I go, 911 00:31:20,128 --> 00:31:22,046 "What are you talking about?" 912 00:31:22,088 --> 00:31:23,673 He says, "I'm gonna kill this guy, man." 913 00:31:23,715 --> 00:31:25,466 So we drive down. 914 00:31:25,508 --> 00:31:27,343 Travolta lived on Santa Monica Boulevard. 915 00:31:27,385 --> 00:31:28,720 And I said, "Freddie, what are we doing?" 916 00:31:28,761 --> 00:31:31,222 He says, "I'm gonna go shoot him in his apartment." 917 00:31:31,264 --> 00:31:32,891 "Freddie, we are not shooting 918 00:31:32,932 --> 00:31:35,018 any John Travolta in his apartment. 919 00:31:35,059 --> 00:31:37,353 Not happening!" 920 00:31:37,395 --> 00:31:39,230 So I'm wrestling with the guy. 921 00:31:39,272 --> 00:31:40,523 I say, "Give me the bow and arrow. 922 00:31:40,565 --> 00:31:41,524 Give me the thing." 923 00:31:41,566 --> 00:31:43,109 He says, "I'm killing this guy, man. 924 00:31:43,151 --> 00:31:45,278 I'm the biggest star on TV No one's bi--" 925 00:31:45,320 --> 00:31:46,779 I said, "Well, Freddie, a lot of people are on TV. 926 00:31:46,821 --> 00:31:47,906 I'm on TV." He said, 927 00:31:47,947 --> 00:31:49,115 "You're not bigger than me, man! 928 00:31:49,157 --> 00:31:50,700 I'm the biggest guy! 929 00:31:50,742 --> 00:31:52,076 I'm the best guy! Everybody knows me! 930 00:31:52,118 --> 00:31:53,703 I'm the funniest guy!" 931 00:31:53,745 --> 00:31:55,246 "All right, you're the funniest guy." 932 00:31:55,288 --> 00:31:57,040 Bangs on the door. Boom, boom, boom, boom, boom. 933 00:31:57,081 --> 00:31:58,374 Nobody answers. 934 00:31:58,416 --> 00:32:01,044 I'm relieved. I look back. 935 00:32:01,085 --> 00:32:02,795 There's Freddie with the bow and arrow. 936 00:32:02,837 --> 00:32:04,881 He fires three shots 937 00:32:04,923 --> 00:32:08,259 into Travolta's door. 938 00:32:08,301 --> 00:32:10,219 And I'm sure, to this day, 939 00:32:10,261 --> 00:32:11,596 John Travolta is thinking, 940 00:32:11,638 --> 00:32:12,972 "I wonder what happened in Los Angeles 941 00:32:13,014 --> 00:32:15,266 when a guy fired those shots into my door. 942 00:32:15,308 --> 00:32:16,309 What was that about?" 943 00:32:16,351 --> 00:32:19,520 deep jazz music 944 00:32:25,777 --> 00:32:27,195 [Letterman] We're under a flash flood warning, 945 00:32:27,236 --> 00:32:28,613 but all of that seems of little importance 946 00:32:28,655 --> 00:32:30,573 once you take a look at the cloud cover photograph 947 00:32:30,615 --> 00:32:32,492 made earlier of the United States today. 948 00:32:32,533 --> 00:32:34,619 And I think you'll see that once again, we've fallen 949 00:32:34,661 --> 00:32:36,454 to the prey of political dirty dealings. 950 00:32:36,496 --> 00:32:38,122 The higher-ups have removed the border 951 00:32:38,164 --> 00:32:39,666 between Indiana and Ohio, 952 00:32:39,707 --> 00:32:41,250 making it one giant state. 953 00:32:41,292 --> 00:32:44,212 Personally, I am against it. 954 00:32:44,253 --> 00:32:46,464 We were all standing back here in this area, 955 00:32:46,506 --> 00:32:48,299 and when a new guy came in, all the regulars 956 00:32:48,341 --> 00:32:49,968 kind of stood back in kind of, like, 957 00:32:50,009 --> 00:32:51,636 "Okay, show us what you got" kind of thing, 958 00:32:51,678 --> 00:32:52,971 not really ignoring the guy, 959 00:32:53,012 --> 00:32:54,347 but not paying much attention. 960 00:32:54,389 --> 00:32:56,933 I'll never forget. I'm standing about in this area, 961 00:32:56,975 --> 00:32:58,309 and I hear the guy on stage. 962 00:32:58,351 --> 00:33:00,269 The National Enquirer. That's right. 963 00:33:00,311 --> 00:33:01,729 You folks read the Enquirer? 964 00:33:01,771 --> 00:33:03,189 [scattered cheers and applause] 965 00:33:03,231 --> 00:33:05,984 Last week in the Enquirer, a big story: 966 00:33:06,025 --> 00:33:09,153 how to lose weight without diet or exercise. 967 00:33:10,530 --> 00:33:13,449 Pretty much leaves disease, doesn't it? 968 00:33:13,491 --> 00:33:14,993 When I saw Letterman here, I said, 969 00:33:15,034 --> 00:33:17,161 "This guy is lightning quick, man." 970 00:33:17,203 --> 00:33:19,122 He--he was just lightning fast. 971 00:33:19,163 --> 00:33:21,874 Just boom. And sarcastic. 972 00:33:21,916 --> 00:33:23,584 I came out here. 973 00:33:23,626 --> 00:33:27,672 I told my family that I was gonna be a writer 974 00:33:27,714 --> 00:33:29,757 because you don't want to tell people, 975 00:33:29,799 --> 00:33:32,260 "Oh, you know, I've decided I'm gonna be a comedian." 976 00:33:32,301 --> 00:33:34,178 Letterman is sleeping across the street here 977 00:33:34,220 --> 00:33:35,513 from The Comedy Store in a-- 978 00:33:35,555 --> 00:33:39,058 an apartment the size of a small closet 979 00:33:39,100 --> 00:33:41,561 with a bed and a hot plate. 980 00:33:41,602 --> 00:33:43,813 It was a dump. It was an apartment house 981 00:33:43,855 --> 00:33:45,189 that was just deteriorating. 982 00:33:45,231 --> 00:33:46,691 And then when he wanted to type, he-- 983 00:33:46,733 --> 00:33:47,984 he was--I guess didn't-- 984 00:33:48,026 --> 00:33:50,028 either didn't have enough money or enough energy 985 00:33:50,069 --> 00:33:51,320 to go buy a light bulb, 986 00:33:51,362 --> 00:33:52,697 and he would take his typewriter, 987 00:33:52,739 --> 00:33:55,742 and he would put it on the sink in the bathroom 988 00:33:55,783 --> 00:33:58,119 and sit on the toilet and type. 989 00:33:58,161 --> 00:34:00,121 And they were like little boxes, right? 990 00:34:00,163 --> 00:34:02,040 It was just one room and a bathroom. 991 00:34:02,081 --> 00:34:05,209 So you and Letterman... 992 00:34:05,251 --> 00:34:06,919 Letterman, George Miller... 993 00:34:06,961 --> 00:34:08,546 I could've done all the big shows. 994 00:34:08,588 --> 00:34:10,214 It's just that I've been real busy in my room 995 00:34:10,256 --> 00:34:12,717 the past few years. 996 00:34:12,759 --> 00:34:14,969 I loved to watch George Miller on stage 997 00:34:15,011 --> 00:34:17,722 just because he was, um-- 998 00:34:17,764 --> 00:34:20,058 boy, he was unique. 999 00:34:20,099 --> 00:34:21,350 But all George wanted to do 1000 00:34:21,392 --> 00:34:22,769 was sit in his room all day, 1001 00:34:22,810 --> 00:34:24,479 take illegal drugs, 1002 00:34:24,520 --> 00:34:25,938 write his jokes, 1003 00:34:25,980 --> 00:34:28,066 come out at night, do his jokes, 1004 00:34:28,107 --> 00:34:30,443 and then continue taking illegal drugs. 1005 00:34:30,485 --> 00:34:32,153 And this place was such a drug den, you know. 1006 00:34:32,195 --> 00:34:33,571 - Yeah. - But you didn't do 1007 00:34:33,613 --> 00:34:34,489 a lot of drugs. 1008 00:34:34,530 --> 00:34:35,490 - No, no. - You drank a lot. 1009 00:34:35,531 --> 00:34:36,991 Drank a lot. Yeah, I was a drunk. 1010 00:34:37,033 --> 00:34:38,910 I used to drink vodka 1011 00:34:38,951 --> 00:34:40,745 and Rose's Lime Juice. 1012 00:34:40,787 --> 00:34:42,455 And then--but to get drunk, 1013 00:34:42,497 --> 00:34:44,582 I would always leave and go home and get drunk. 1014 00:34:44,624 --> 00:34:45,917 - [Binder] Oh, really? - Because I didn't want 1015 00:34:45,958 --> 00:34:47,710 anybody to see me shitfaced. 1016 00:34:47,752 --> 00:34:49,420 'Cause I remember, you didn't hang late here. 1017 00:34:49,462 --> 00:34:51,005 No. I tried that once or twice, 1018 00:34:51,047 --> 00:34:52,590 and I just kept thinking, 1019 00:34:52,632 --> 00:34:54,175 "I'm sleepy," 1020 00:34:54,217 --> 00:34:56,094 and so I just went home 1021 00:34:56,135 --> 00:34:58,304 and drank myself to sleep. 1022 00:34:58,346 --> 00:35:00,765 It was always apparent he was gonna do well 1023 00:35:00,807 --> 00:35:04,727 as a talk show host, 'cause he was so damn host-y. 1024 00:35:04,769 --> 00:35:06,270 He just looked host-ian... 1025 00:35:06,312 --> 00:35:08,147 David walks behind the stage to get ready 1026 00:35:08,189 --> 00:35:10,024 for his next show, and he's got his notes 1027 00:35:10,066 --> 00:35:11,609 for his open, 1028 00:35:11,651 --> 00:35:13,444 and my prop person 1029 00:35:13,486 --> 00:35:15,196 is putting my props together. 1030 00:35:15,238 --> 00:35:16,614 Well, I was living with that person. 1031 00:35:16,656 --> 00:35:17,782 It was Debra Winger. 1032 00:35:17,824 --> 00:35:20,201 And David and Debra met behind this curtain. 1033 00:35:20,243 --> 00:35:21,619 He says, "Well, who are you?" 1034 00:35:21,661 --> 00:35:24,288 I like the everyday guy thing. He was really cute. 1035 00:35:24,330 --> 00:35:25,790 You know, he had a split in his teeth, 1036 00:35:25,832 --> 00:35:26,874 and he had a wife, 1037 00:35:26,916 --> 00:35:28,501 and he was, like, normal. 1038 00:35:28,543 --> 00:35:31,295 You had some great bits, you know, that-- 1039 00:35:31,337 --> 00:35:33,965 that--I remember the bit-- 1040 00:35:34,006 --> 00:35:36,551 Please don't quote material... 1041 00:35:36,592 --> 00:35:38,052 - No. - ...I used to do. 1042 00:35:38,094 --> 00:35:39,470 - No, I won't. - Just describe it. 1043 00:35:39,512 --> 00:35:41,389 - I'm not gonna. - Just describe it, Mike. 1044 00:35:41,430 --> 00:35:42,974 Well, isn't quoting describing it? 1045 00:35:43,015 --> 00:35:45,059 It's more tolerable to me 1046 00:35:45,101 --> 00:35:47,103 if you just describe it, and then I'll... 1047 00:35:47,145 --> 00:35:48,437 - And then you'll do it? - ...I'll determine 1048 00:35:48,479 --> 00:35:50,106 whether it's going to be done or not. 1049 00:35:50,148 --> 00:35:52,817 Okay, the weatherman that had to do one of the murders. 1050 00:35:52,859 --> 00:35:54,068 Yeah, no, we don't want to discuss that. 1051 00:35:54,110 --> 00:35:55,153 - That was a great one. - No, no. 1052 00:35:55,194 --> 00:35:56,654 I loved that one, and-- 1053 00:35:56,696 --> 00:35:58,656 I'll describe it. It was the idea of-- 1054 00:35:58,698 --> 00:36:01,117 this was the advent of where everybody 1055 00:36:01,159 --> 00:36:02,869 on the local newscast-- 1056 00:36:02,910 --> 00:36:05,371 friendly, happy, we're all funny, 1057 00:36:05,413 --> 00:36:08,499 we're all buddies, we love one another-- 1058 00:36:08,541 --> 00:36:13,129 and something about, uh, a guy doing the ball scores. 1059 00:36:13,171 --> 00:36:16,757 The Cubs beat the Cardinals. 1060 00:36:16,799 --> 00:36:19,302 - God, you're botching it up. - The Cincinnati Reds... 1061 00:36:19,343 --> 00:36:20,595 - Look at you. - ...beat the Giants. 1062 00:36:20,636 --> 00:36:21,387 How old are you? 1063 00:36:21,429 --> 00:36:23,055 The, uh--the Yankees 1064 00:36:23,097 --> 00:36:24,682 beat the Red Sox, 1065 00:36:24,724 --> 00:36:29,270 and the Dodgers murdered the Padres. 1066 00:36:29,312 --> 00:36:30,980 Speaking of murders... 1067 00:36:31,022 --> 00:36:34,317 and then I would go on to describe some grisly... 1068 00:36:34,358 --> 00:36:36,194 - You just ruined a... - ...unpleasant murder. 1069 00:36:36,235 --> 00:36:37,653 ...beautiful piece of art. 1070 00:36:37,695 --> 00:36:38,696 [laughs] 1071 00:36:38,738 --> 00:36:41,449 You should be ashamed of yourself. 1072 00:36:41,490 --> 00:36:42,742 Yeah, you had some great beats. 1073 00:36:42,783 --> 00:36:44,368 - No, I'll de-- - Well, I'm not gonna do it. 1074 00:36:44,410 --> 00:36:45,536 - I'll defer to you. - Let me just say. 1075 00:36:45,578 --> 00:36:47,538 I'll defer to you. It's no "High High." 1076 00:36:47,580 --> 00:36:50,208 It's no "High High." It sure is not. 1077 00:36:50,249 --> 00:36:53,169 One day in Indianapolis, there were three murders 1078 00:36:53,211 --> 00:36:54,462 and the news director didn't think 1079 00:36:54,503 --> 00:36:56,172 it would be too amusing to have the anchorman 1080 00:36:56,214 --> 00:36:58,382 report all three murders back to back, 1081 00:36:58,424 --> 00:37:01,260 so they gave one to the sportscaster to do. 1082 00:37:01,677 --> 00:37:04,889 The guy was reading baseball scores at the time. 1083 00:37:04,931 --> 00:37:06,390 "Well, first, in the National League, 1084 00:37:06,432 --> 00:37:08,100 it was the Mets over the Braves, 3-2. 1085 00:37:08,142 --> 00:37:09,727 Reds got passed at the Cards, 5-4, 1086 00:37:09,769 --> 00:37:13,022 and the Dodgers murdered the Giants, 9-0. 1087 00:37:13,064 --> 00:37:14,732 Speaking of murders... 1088 00:37:16,442 --> 00:37:18,819 Looks like 45-year-old Eddie Pasteur 1089 00:37:18,861 --> 00:37:21,405 won't be going out to the old ballpark anymore. 1090 00:37:21,447 --> 00:37:23,908 [laughter, applause] 1091 00:37:28,788 --> 00:37:30,998 He was gunned down last night during a liquor store holdup. 1092 00:37:31,040 --> 00:37:33,334 Once again, final score: liquor store 1, Eddie nothing. 1093 00:37:33,376 --> 00:37:35,127 Now on to golf." 1094 00:37:35,169 --> 00:37:36,545 What did you come out to do? 1095 00:37:36,587 --> 00:37:37,588 [laughs] 1096 00:37:37,630 --> 00:37:38,923 Since I never really understood that. 1097 00:37:38,965 --> 00:37:41,092 Nobody's--nobody's ever asked me that question. 1098 00:37:41,133 --> 00:37:44,595 I--really, uh, was looking to get into insurance. 1099 00:37:44,637 --> 00:37:46,097 - Is that what it was? - Yes. 1100 00:37:46,138 --> 00:37:47,848 Yes, and my car broke down right out in front... 1101 00:37:47,890 --> 00:37:49,267 Yeah, right in front of the Store. 1102 00:37:49,308 --> 00:37:50,309 - Uh-huh. - A lot of comedians, 1103 00:37:50,351 --> 00:37:51,644 to this day, 1104 00:37:51,686 --> 00:37:53,729 never really knew what they wanted to do. 1105 00:37:53,771 --> 00:37:55,481 If they didn't know what they wanted to do, 1106 00:37:55,523 --> 00:37:57,316 why were they here? What was it? 1107 00:37:57,358 --> 00:37:58,609 Well, I'll give you a really good example. 1108 00:37:58,651 --> 00:38:01,112 One of the funniest guys I knew, Jeff Altman. 1109 00:38:01,153 --> 00:38:04,699 [big band music playing] 1110 00:38:04,740 --> 00:38:07,785 Jeff Altman just came here one night after college, 1111 00:38:07,827 --> 00:38:09,954 and he was sitting in this room, 1112 00:38:09,996 --> 00:38:12,456 and Mitzi Shore-- he heard Mitzi going, 1113 00:38:12,498 --> 00:38:14,125 "What do you mean there's no comedian?" 1114 00:38:14,166 --> 00:38:15,251 I walked over to Mitzi. I said, 1115 00:38:15,293 --> 00:38:16,752 "Miss Shore, can I go up on stage?" 1116 00:38:16,794 --> 00:38:18,963 She said, [nasally] "What do you do?" 1117 00:38:19,005 --> 00:38:20,464 I said, "Well, I can do a few impressions." 1118 00:38:20,506 --> 00:38:22,174 "What's your name?" I said, "Altman." 1119 00:38:22,216 --> 00:38:24,635 "All right, Altman, go up on stage and try it." 1120 00:38:24,677 --> 00:38:26,470 And I went up on stage and did 1121 00:38:26,512 --> 00:38:28,264 most of David Frye's act. 1122 00:38:28,306 --> 00:38:29,640 I miss Muhammad Ali. 1123 00:38:29,682 --> 00:38:31,183 It's just not the same without him around. 1124 00:38:31,225 --> 00:38:32,810 I mean, all the chatter. [as Muhammad Ali] Hello, Pam. 1125 00:38:32,852 --> 00:38:34,645 Some said Frazier was the greatest of all time. 1126 00:38:34,687 --> 00:38:36,439 I beat George Foreman, some says it was good. 1127 00:38:36,480 --> 00:38:37,815 I prove--[as Cosell] Slow down, Muhammad, 1128 00:38:37,857 --> 00:38:39,817 you're absolutely the... [as Ali] Shut up, Cosell, 1129 00:38:39,859 --> 00:38:41,485 asshole-breath, I don't have--ba-bam. 1130 00:38:41,527 --> 00:38:42,653 I got a few laughs, and she said, 1131 00:38:42,695 --> 00:38:43,988 "Well, that wasn't bad, Altman. 1132 00:38:44,030 --> 00:38:45,072 You can come back." 1133 00:38:45,114 --> 00:38:47,408 [imitates Doppler effect] 1134 00:38:47,450 --> 00:38:48,826 And that's how I started. 1135 00:38:48,868 --> 00:38:51,662 We spent two weeks together doing a television show. 1136 00:38:51,704 --> 00:38:53,164 And you'll also see the Starland Vocal Band 1137 00:38:53,205 --> 00:38:54,582 hard at work... 1138 00:38:54,623 --> 00:38:56,917 [band] Country roads 1139 00:38:56,959 --> 00:38:59,420 Take me home 1140 00:38:59,462 --> 00:39:01,213 Jeff and I were hired 1141 00:39:01,255 --> 00:39:04,425 to be the stooges on the show, 1142 00:39:04,467 --> 00:39:07,553 and before the six-week run of that show, 1143 00:39:07,595 --> 00:39:10,556 the Starland Vocal Band was out of business, gone, 1144 00:39:10,598 --> 00:39:13,225 but for two weeks, honest to God, 1145 00:39:13,267 --> 00:39:17,396 my sternum was sore from laughing. 1146 00:39:17,438 --> 00:39:19,148 Nobody really cares about your stupid cars. 1147 00:39:19,190 --> 00:39:21,609 We're actually interested in the Starland Vocal Band. 1148 00:39:21,650 --> 00:39:22,651 You'd be the first guy to come to me 1149 00:39:22,693 --> 00:39:24,070 with a gummed-up carburetor, 1150 00:39:24,111 --> 00:39:25,363 and, uh, all you had to fix it 1151 00:39:25,404 --> 00:39:26,614 was some kind of guitar pick or something. 1152 00:39:26,655 --> 00:39:29,533 You know, Billy, your eyes really twinkle 1153 00:39:29,575 --> 00:39:30,701 when you say something moronic like that. 1154 00:39:30,743 --> 00:39:32,036 Well, I'd sure like to twinkle you. 1155 00:39:32,078 --> 00:39:33,996 Okay, you want to put Billy back up on the lift? 1156 00:39:34,038 --> 00:39:34,955 On the lift? Hey. 1157 00:39:34,997 --> 00:39:36,540 Thank you so much, Billy. 1158 00:39:36,582 --> 00:39:38,542 Okay, there we go. 1159 00:39:38,584 --> 00:39:40,878 In 1980, I was lucky enough 1160 00:39:40,920 --> 00:39:42,713 to have garnered 1161 00:39:42,755 --> 00:39:45,508 the wonderful Pink Lady and Jeff show. 1162 00:39:45,549 --> 00:39:47,676 Pink Lady and Jeff, when-- ooh, when that was announced, 1163 00:39:47,718 --> 00:39:50,137 man, Jeff's got a show, a variety show! 1164 00:39:50,179 --> 00:39:52,431 Probably the biggest mistake I ever made in show business 1165 00:39:52,473 --> 00:39:53,557 was doing that show. 1166 00:39:53,599 --> 00:39:55,142 Somebody dangled a lot of money 1167 00:39:55,184 --> 00:39:56,644 in front of me. 1168 00:39:56,685 --> 00:39:57,895 You're going to star on your own show, 1169 00:39:57,937 --> 00:39:59,563 and it's with these two Japanese girls 1170 00:39:59,605 --> 00:40:01,649 that are like the Beatles in Japan. 1171 00:40:01,690 --> 00:40:03,734 How do you meet people in your country? 1172 00:40:03,776 --> 00:40:05,069 We have a thing that's a lot easier in this country. 1173 00:40:05,111 --> 00:40:06,904 It's called computer dating. 1174 00:40:06,946 --> 00:40:08,864 Oh, you date a computer? 1175 00:40:10,282 --> 00:40:13,577 I told you he was strange. 1176 00:40:13,619 --> 00:40:15,913 And they spoke phonetically, and they managed to get 1177 00:40:15,955 --> 00:40:17,581 through five shows that we taped. 1178 00:40:17,623 --> 00:40:19,250 Can't believe I'm standing on the stage 1179 00:40:19,291 --> 00:40:20,626 with Jerry Lewis! 1180 00:40:20,668 --> 00:40:21,544 What do you think I'm going through? 1181 00:40:21,585 --> 00:40:22,920 I don't know! 1182 00:40:22,962 --> 00:40:25,965 My friends out there know I'm gonna be with, uh... 1183 00:40:26,006 --> 00:40:26,966 Jeff Altman. 1184 00:40:27,007 --> 00:40:29,593 [laughter] 1185 00:40:29,635 --> 00:40:31,554 Hey, lady! Whoa, whoa, whoa. 1186 00:40:31,595 --> 00:40:32,972 I remember my manager 1187 00:40:33,013 --> 00:40:35,516 sitting there with the heads of NBC sitting there, 1188 00:40:35,558 --> 00:40:37,268 going, "Yeah, this sounds like a good idea. 1189 00:40:37,309 --> 00:40:39,979 This was a great... Okay, yeah, we should do this." 1190 00:40:40,020 --> 00:40:42,940 And had I not done that show, in my mind, 1191 00:40:42,982 --> 00:40:45,192 and waited to do, like, an ensemble piece 1192 00:40:45,234 --> 00:40:46,694 in a nice sitcom, 1193 00:40:46,735 --> 00:40:48,320 I think I would've had a very different career. 1194 00:40:48,362 --> 00:40:50,072 [Binder] What do you regret about your time 1195 00:40:50,114 --> 00:40:51,115 at The Comedy Store? 1196 00:40:51,157 --> 00:40:53,117 Stayed too long. 1197 00:40:53,159 --> 00:40:55,536 I had developed a little act 1198 00:40:55,578 --> 00:40:57,121 that I would do in Vegas or something 1199 00:40:57,163 --> 00:40:59,623 that was about 20 minutes long, 25 minutes long, 1200 00:40:59,665 --> 00:41:01,000 and I would come here and do that every night 1201 00:41:01,041 --> 00:41:02,084 at The Comedy Store, 1202 00:41:02,126 --> 00:41:03,502 and it started getting a little lame. 1203 00:41:03,544 --> 00:41:05,588 I never worked hard enough 1204 00:41:05,629 --> 00:41:07,756 on creating new material for my act. 1205 00:41:07,798 --> 00:41:09,300 That makes me look inside myself, 1206 00:41:09,341 --> 00:41:12,094 and what do I see? I see somebody who's kind of, 1207 00:41:12,136 --> 00:41:16,932 at least in the last 15 years, lazy, 1208 00:41:16,974 --> 00:41:19,143 just fucking lazy. 1209 00:41:19,185 --> 00:41:20,978 It was always a job, and the comedians, 1210 00:41:21,020 --> 00:41:22,855 successful, are the ones that worked at it. 1211 00:41:22,897 --> 00:41:25,649 There are a lot of really funny comedians 1212 00:41:25,691 --> 00:41:27,234 who would come here, and they'd-- 1213 00:41:27,276 --> 00:41:28,777 they'd have a Comedy Store act. 1214 00:41:28,819 --> 00:41:31,238 They'd have ten minutes on this piece of plastic 1215 00:41:31,280 --> 00:41:32,406 and five minutes on-- 1216 00:41:32,448 --> 00:41:33,491 and then they go somewhere else, 1217 00:41:33,532 --> 00:41:34,617 and the act didn't work. 1218 00:41:34,658 --> 00:41:35,910 You know, my attitude was always, 1219 00:41:35,951 --> 00:41:38,037 if you're any good, if you get good someplace, 1220 00:41:38,078 --> 00:41:40,122 get out of there and go to the next place. 1221 00:41:40,164 --> 00:41:41,332 - Yeah. - You know? 1222 00:41:41,373 --> 00:41:42,875 Just so many acts would have 1223 00:41:42,917 --> 00:41:44,502 "Comedy Store" ma-- and they were funny, 1224 00:41:44,543 --> 00:41:46,295 as long as they were at The Comedy Store. 1225 00:41:46,337 --> 00:41:47,796 This was like a college. 1226 00:41:47,838 --> 00:41:48,881 You know, I came here to go to school, 1227 00:41:48,923 --> 00:41:50,633 to learn, and I did learn. 1228 00:41:50,674 --> 00:41:52,218 It was the greatest place in the world. 1229 00:41:52,259 --> 00:41:53,719 smooth music 1230 00:41:53,761 --> 00:41:55,012 [Letterman] Without question, 1231 00:41:55,054 --> 00:41:57,515 Jay was the funniest of all of us. 1232 00:41:57,556 --> 00:41:59,350 I never saw him-- I never saw him bomb. 1233 00:41:59,391 --> 00:42:00,351 All the comedians would do our set, 1234 00:42:00,392 --> 00:42:01,727 we'd go outside, and we'd talk. 1235 00:42:01,769 --> 00:42:03,354 Someone'd say, "Jay's on," and we'd all run inside, 1236 00:42:03,395 --> 00:42:04,438 and we'd all stand in the back. 1237 00:42:04,480 --> 00:42:05,481 I don't know how women 1238 00:42:05,523 --> 00:42:06,732 talk about sex with other women, 1239 00:42:06,774 --> 00:42:08,317 but guys are real silly. 1240 00:42:08,359 --> 00:42:11,362 Like, you know, a guy-- no guy gets laid once. 1241 00:42:11,403 --> 00:42:12,780 You know what I'm saying? 1242 00:42:12,821 --> 00:42:14,031 It's always like, "Hey, Bob, how'd your date go 1243 00:42:14,073 --> 00:42:16,367 with Susan last night?" "Eh, not bad. 1244 00:42:16,408 --> 00:42:17,952 Went back to my place. 1245 00:42:17,993 --> 00:42:21,038 Guess we balled about 52 times." 1246 00:42:21,080 --> 00:42:23,290 [laughter] 1247 00:42:23,332 --> 00:42:24,917 Then you talk to Susan. 1248 00:42:24,959 --> 00:42:28,170 [feminine voice] "Well, Bob had a little problem... 1249 00:42:28,212 --> 00:42:31,549 guess he'd been working hard at the office." 1250 00:42:33,175 --> 00:42:35,803 Plus, the more guys are around, the more macho the story. 1251 00:42:35,844 --> 00:42:37,137 That's the big thing, you know? 1252 00:42:37,179 --> 00:42:38,889 A guy will never really say what happened, 1253 00:42:38,931 --> 00:42:40,683 even if he had a good time. 1254 00:42:40,724 --> 00:42:42,309 You know, a guy could've gone to the girl's house, 1255 00:42:42,351 --> 00:42:43,602 he might've taken a bubble bath, 1256 00:42:43,644 --> 00:42:45,437 had a few laughs, 1257 00:42:45,479 --> 00:42:47,606 hugged, went to bed. Happens a lot. 1258 00:42:47,648 --> 00:42:48,857 But you never hear a guy tell that story. 1259 00:42:48,899 --> 00:42:50,150 A guy will always say, "Yeah, I took her 1260 00:42:50,192 --> 00:42:51,318 back to my house, 1261 00:42:51,360 --> 00:42:52,528 hung her by her heels, 1262 00:42:52,570 --> 00:42:53,904 hit her with a gun butt a few times. 1263 00:42:53,946 --> 00:42:55,739 Yeah. 1264 00:42:55,781 --> 00:42:59,243 Fired a dumdum bullet in her brother's forehead. 1265 00:42:59,285 --> 00:43:00,744 Yeah, I had a good time." 1266 00:43:01,579 --> 00:43:04,164 Well. Mm. Mm. 1267 00:43:04,206 --> 00:43:05,583 What else did this guy say? Well, you know what? 1268 00:43:05,624 --> 00:43:06,709 You know what else this guy said? 1269 00:43:06,750 --> 00:43:08,043 And I thought this was fascinating. 1270 00:43:08,085 --> 00:43:10,629 This guy said that the average male 1271 00:43:10,671 --> 00:43:14,717 has 10,000 orgasms in his lifetime. 1272 00:43:14,758 --> 00:43:18,596 Called my doctor Thursday. I have nine left. 1273 00:43:21,890 --> 00:43:24,435 Now you start thinking about all the ones you wasted. 1274 00:43:24,476 --> 00:43:25,853 Jesus. 1275 00:43:25,894 --> 00:43:26,979 You know, when I was a kid, there used to be 1276 00:43:27,021 --> 00:43:28,647 a show called The Danny Thomas Show, 1277 00:43:28,689 --> 00:43:30,899 and every night, Danny would have dinner with his wife, 1278 00:43:30,941 --> 00:43:32,401 and he'd go, "Honey, I'm going down to the club," 1279 00:43:32,443 --> 00:43:34,403 and I thought, "Well, what a cool life that is." 1280 00:43:34,445 --> 00:43:35,988 You know, you have your home, 1281 00:43:36,030 --> 00:43:37,948 and then you have the club where you perform. 1282 00:43:37,990 --> 00:43:39,783 You know, in my mind, this was that. 1283 00:43:39,825 --> 00:43:42,286 I mean, I could come to "the club" every night, 1284 00:43:42,328 --> 00:43:44,788 and I could hang out with other comedians. 1285 00:43:44,830 --> 00:43:46,832 You learn things from watching Jay, 1286 00:43:46,874 --> 00:43:48,792 and you could imitate them a little bit, 1287 00:43:48,834 --> 00:43:53,005 but because it was so of Jay that it was impossible. 1288 00:43:53,047 --> 00:43:56,133 I was, uh, a big--"Hey, you know, everybody cool? 1289 00:43:56,175 --> 00:43:57,635 Everybody all right? Blah, blah, blah." 1290 00:43:57,676 --> 00:43:59,428 There was a lot of physicality to it. 1291 00:43:59,470 --> 00:44:00,804 Like, Letterman said to me, 1292 00:44:00,846 --> 00:44:02,181 "How can you be so confident up there?" 1293 00:44:02,222 --> 00:44:03,265 And I would say, 1294 00:44:03,307 --> 00:44:04,642 "How do you write such great jokes?" 1295 00:44:04,683 --> 00:44:06,477 You know. I'm a huge believer 1296 00:44:06,518 --> 00:44:08,270 in low self-esteem. 1297 00:44:08,312 --> 00:44:09,438 I think low self-esteem 1298 00:44:09,480 --> 00:44:10,898 is really what helps you get ahead, 1299 00:44:10,939 --> 00:44:11,982 because you don't automatically think 1300 00:44:12,024 --> 00:44:13,734 you're the smartest person in the room. 1301 00:44:13,776 --> 00:44:15,235 You know, I'm dyslexic. I can't spell. 1302 00:44:15,277 --> 00:44:16,654 I've never written anything down. 1303 00:44:16,695 --> 00:44:18,822 I just try to keep it all in my head. 1304 00:44:18,864 --> 00:44:21,325 And that works for me, and if I assume, 1305 00:44:21,367 --> 00:44:22,951 you know, "I'm not as good as these guys. 1306 00:44:22,993 --> 00:44:24,703 I'll just have to work a little bit harder," 1307 00:44:24,745 --> 00:44:25,996 that's what works for me. 1308 00:44:26,038 --> 00:44:27,706 I never flew Pittsburgh to Los Angeles. 1309 00:44:27,748 --> 00:44:30,042 This was the worst airline flight. 1310 00:44:30,084 --> 00:44:32,336 - I--anyway... - But you enjoyed your flight. 1311 00:44:32,378 --> 00:44:34,213 Well, you know what it is? It makes these stops, 1312 00:44:34,254 --> 00:44:35,756 and not e--it's not even like regular stops. 1313 00:44:35,798 --> 00:44:36,924 It's so, like, the pilot 1314 00:44:36,965 --> 00:44:38,175 can show the plane to his friends. 1315 00:44:38,217 --> 00:44:39,510 You know, that kind of... 1316 00:44:39,551 --> 00:44:40,719 [Letterman laughing] 1317 00:44:40,761 --> 00:44:43,681 gentle guitar music 1318 00:44:52,231 --> 00:44:54,024 [Letterman] Oh, man. Michael Keaton. 1319 00:44:54,066 --> 00:44:56,235 I just--I love him, loved him then... 1320 00:44:56,276 --> 00:44:58,946 Michael Keaton was a great comic. 1321 00:44:58,987 --> 00:45:01,573 A joke he used to do-- he'd make me laugh all the time 1322 00:45:01,615 --> 00:45:03,367 about women, the way they talk. 1323 00:45:03,409 --> 00:45:05,244 You almost never heard a construction worker say, 1324 00:45:05,285 --> 00:45:08,747 "Cute top." 1325 00:45:08,789 --> 00:45:10,916 He was so likable on stage. 1326 00:45:10,958 --> 00:45:13,544 The average four-year-old, ego-wise, 1327 00:45:13,585 --> 00:45:15,045 doesn't have that much on the line. 1328 00:45:15,087 --> 00:45:16,672 You know? The average four-year-old 1329 00:45:16,714 --> 00:45:17,756 doesn't have too many furrowed brows 1330 00:45:17,798 --> 00:45:19,425 or a look of concern... 1331 00:45:19,466 --> 00:45:20,884 "Jeez, I was supposed to be at the playground 1332 00:45:20,926 --> 00:45:23,721 at three o'clock. I'm late!" 1333 00:45:23,762 --> 00:45:25,389 You used to have this really funny thing. 1334 00:45:25,431 --> 00:45:28,225 It's funny how comedians will always remember some... 1335 00:45:28,267 --> 00:45:30,227 one or two or three really funny things 1336 00:45:30,269 --> 00:45:32,146 that maybe nobody else laughed at 1337 00:45:32,187 --> 00:45:33,689 that you just found hysterical. 1338 00:45:33,731 --> 00:45:35,065 You said that thing about your dad. 1339 00:45:35,107 --> 00:45:36,191 You said, "You know, we're thinking 1340 00:45:36,233 --> 00:45:38,569 about putting my dad in a rest home." 1341 00:45:38,610 --> 00:45:40,070 You go--do you remember this? 1342 00:45:40,112 --> 00:45:42,030 See, you probably just threw it away one night, 1343 00:45:42,072 --> 00:45:43,741 and I found that hysterically funny. 1344 00:45:43,782 --> 00:45:44,950 You said, "Thinking about putting my dad 1345 00:45:44,992 --> 00:45:46,869 in a rest home, and, you know, 1346 00:45:46,910 --> 00:45:48,245 doesn't wanna go, and he's resisting, 1347 00:45:48,287 --> 00:45:49,955 and I said to him, 'Come on, Dad. 1348 00:45:49,997 --> 00:45:51,832 - You're 42.'" - Oh, yeah, you're right. 1349 00:45:51,874 --> 00:45:53,292 I forgot about that. I did. 1350 00:45:53,333 --> 00:45:54,752 Let me explain this to you. You see, I want my dad 1351 00:45:54,793 --> 00:45:56,211 to go into a nursing home. 1352 00:45:56,253 --> 00:45:57,588 I'm going, "Dad, 1353 00:45:57,629 --> 00:46:00,674 you're 44 years old. 1354 00:46:00,716 --> 00:46:02,926 Let's wrap it up, Pop, okay?" 1355 00:46:02,968 --> 00:46:04,595 I was standing right here one time. 1356 00:46:04,636 --> 00:46:05,763 I made the fatal mistake 1357 00:46:05,804 --> 00:46:07,931 of eating before I went on stage. 1358 00:46:07,973 --> 00:46:11,185 I-I hadn't eaten all day. I was starving. 1359 00:46:11,226 --> 00:46:14,646 Letterman walks by me and says some smartass remark. 1360 00:46:14,688 --> 00:46:16,023 He was right. He looks at me. 1361 00:46:16,064 --> 00:46:17,191 And I'm eating a big cheeseburger, 1362 00:46:17,232 --> 00:46:18,859 and it was kind of like this. I go... 1363 00:46:18,901 --> 00:46:20,235 All right. You set it down, 1364 00:46:20,277 --> 00:46:22,070 and you wipe your mouth, and you go on stage. 1365 00:46:22,112 --> 00:46:23,447 You're horrible. You can never eat 1366 00:46:23,489 --> 00:46:24,865 just before you go on stage. 1367 00:46:24,907 --> 00:46:26,116 A lot of people go, "Michael Keaton 1368 00:46:26,158 --> 00:46:28,911 did stand-up comedy?" And they don't know. 1369 00:46:28,952 --> 00:46:30,287 - Yeah, I know. - [Binder] And it bothers me. 1370 00:46:30,329 --> 00:46:31,622 You know? 1371 00:46:31,663 --> 00:46:33,707 And then they'll go, "Yeah, no, that makes sense." 1372 00:46:33,749 --> 00:46:35,626 He's oh so funny in "Beetlejuice." 1373 00:46:35,667 --> 00:46:37,795 That is why I won't do 1374 00:46:37,836 --> 00:46:39,463 two shows a night anymore, babe. 1375 00:46:39,505 --> 00:46:40,672 I won't. I won't do it. 1376 00:46:40,714 --> 00:46:42,007 He was one of those guys. 1377 00:46:42,049 --> 00:46:43,967 As soon as he made it big, he quit stand-up. 1378 00:46:44,009 --> 00:46:45,803 I got hired out of here by Robert Klein 1379 00:46:45,844 --> 00:46:47,137 to do a pilot. 1380 00:46:47,179 --> 00:46:48,680 I remember him on that Mary Tyler Moore 1381 00:46:48,722 --> 00:46:49,932 variety show, he and Letterman 1382 00:46:49,973 --> 00:46:51,725 both being humiliated 1383 00:46:51,767 --> 00:46:53,143 within an inch of their lives. 1384 00:46:53,185 --> 00:46:55,395 Think I should start dating? 1385 00:46:55,437 --> 00:46:56,980 Came as soon as I heard. 1386 00:46:57,022 --> 00:46:58,816 Get out, you swinging single. 1387 00:46:58,857 --> 00:47:00,150 Hey, you got me all wrong. 1388 00:47:00,192 --> 00:47:01,401 I'm a door-to-door salesman. 1389 00:47:01,443 --> 00:47:03,403 - Wanna buy an encyclopedia? - No. 1390 00:47:03,445 --> 00:47:05,239 - Okay, wanna have sex? - Get out! 1391 00:47:05,280 --> 00:47:07,366 He did Working Stiffs with Jim Belushi. 1392 00:47:08,534 --> 00:47:09,576 All right. [grunts] 1393 00:47:09,618 --> 00:47:11,119 Hey, you're not sweating. 1394 00:47:11,161 --> 00:47:13,413 Ah, I'm trying to quit. 1395 00:47:13,455 --> 00:47:15,582 And then, when he got-- was it Night Shift ? 1396 00:47:15,624 --> 00:47:16,917 I'm an idea man, Chuck. 1397 00:47:16,959 --> 00:47:18,001 I got ideas all day long. 1398 00:47:18,043 --> 00:47:19,586 I can't control them. It's like, 1399 00:47:19,628 --> 00:47:20,838 they come charging in. 1400 00:47:20,879 --> 00:47:22,297 I can't even fight them if I wanted to, 1401 00:47:22,339 --> 00:47:23,006 you know? Ah! 1402 00:47:23,048 --> 00:47:24,216 Then Mr. Mom. 1403 00:47:24,258 --> 00:47:26,009 I mean, it kind of happened quick. 1404 00:47:26,051 --> 00:47:29,179 That kind of took his characterizations 1405 00:47:29,221 --> 00:47:30,848 that he was doing on stage 1406 00:47:30,889 --> 00:47:32,516 put it in a film, 1407 00:47:32,558 --> 00:47:35,018 and then boom, I'm Batman. 1408 00:47:35,060 --> 00:47:38,146 dramatic music 1409 00:47:38,188 --> 00:47:40,065 I don't know that I've ever told anyone this. 1410 00:47:40,107 --> 00:47:43,277 I distinctly remember the turning point, 1411 00:47:43,318 --> 00:47:44,903 and it was--I was in a crummy little apartment 1412 00:47:44,945 --> 00:47:47,698 on Whitsett Avenue in the Valley. 1413 00:47:47,739 --> 00:47:49,616 And I was not-- I was down, man. 1414 00:47:49,658 --> 00:47:52,995 I just wasn't doing anything I thought was any good. 1415 00:47:53,036 --> 00:47:54,705 I don't think the audience thought so, either. 1416 00:47:54,746 --> 00:47:56,748 I said, "This is it, man. I don't know what I'm gonna do. 1417 00:47:56,790 --> 00:47:58,125 I'm gonna freewheel it. 1418 00:47:58,166 --> 00:47:59,710 And I'm gonna improv, and I'm just gonna go." 1419 00:47:59,751 --> 00:48:00,752 And I was so pumped, 1420 00:48:00,794 --> 00:48:02,629 and my energy was so high 1421 00:48:02,671 --> 00:48:04,256 when I got here, 1422 00:48:04,298 --> 00:48:05,549 and the sh--there was an opening. 1423 00:48:05,591 --> 00:48:08,093 It was, like, a 9:30 spot or something like that, 1424 00:48:08,135 --> 00:48:10,387 and she said, "Go-- if you get down here," 1425 00:48:10,429 --> 00:48:12,097 or when I show up, she says, 1426 00:48:12,139 --> 00:48:13,390 "Stick around. I'll put you up in a minute." 1427 00:48:13,432 --> 00:48:15,058 Somebody didn't show or something. 1428 00:48:15,100 --> 00:48:16,393 It was called fallouts back then. 1429 00:48:16,435 --> 00:48:18,020 - Do you remember? - Yeah, there was a fallout. 1430 00:48:18,061 --> 00:48:20,397 We had a fallout, so I hit the ground running, 1431 00:48:20,439 --> 00:48:22,941 the stage, and I just commandeered it. 1432 00:48:22,983 --> 00:48:24,276 I just took over. 1433 00:48:24,318 --> 00:48:25,777 And I said, "I don't know how this is gonna go," 1434 00:48:25,819 --> 00:48:27,112 and that was it, 1435 00:48:27,154 --> 00:48:29,406 and I started to get consistently good spots. 1436 00:48:29,448 --> 00:48:33,660 And that was just me choosing to say, 1437 00:48:33,702 --> 00:48:35,245 "I gotta turn this around, 1438 00:48:35,287 --> 00:48:36,997 'cause what I'm doing right now is not making me very happy, 1439 00:48:37,039 --> 00:48:38,332 and I'm--and I'm really mediocre." 1440 00:48:38,373 --> 00:48:40,334 You know. Um, and then I started 1441 00:48:40,375 --> 00:48:42,794 writing like crazy, and I was really energized. 1442 00:48:42,836 --> 00:48:44,129 Michael Keaton's stand-up-- 1443 00:48:44,171 --> 00:48:45,547 it was all conceptual. 1444 00:48:45,589 --> 00:48:49,009 He would read a Bazooka Joe bubble gum wrapper 1445 00:48:49,051 --> 00:48:51,094 that had a fortune in it. 1446 00:48:51,136 --> 00:48:52,554 Remember Bazooka Joe bubble gum? 1447 00:48:52,596 --> 00:48:53,680 [crowd assents] 1448 00:48:53,722 --> 00:48:55,349 I'll just read it to you. Now, you might not laugh, 1449 00:48:55,390 --> 00:48:56,475 but I think this is very funny. 1450 00:48:56,516 --> 00:48:57,768 He says--Bazooka Joe 1451 00:48:57,809 --> 00:48:59,519 has a clock in his hand, you know? 1452 00:48:59,561 --> 00:49:00,520 And Tubby says, 1453 00:49:00,562 --> 00:49:02,105 "What are you doing, Bazooka Joe?" 1454 00:49:02,147 --> 00:49:04,441 And he says, "I'm throwing a clock out the window." 1455 00:49:04,483 --> 00:49:05,525 And he says, "Why?" 1456 00:49:05,567 --> 00:49:06,777 And Bazooka Joe says, 1457 00:49:06,818 --> 00:49:08,946 "I wanted to see time fly." 1458 00:49:08,987 --> 00:49:10,322 Okay? 1459 00:49:10,364 --> 00:49:12,824 All right, now wait a minute. Wait a minute. 1460 00:49:12,866 --> 00:49:14,660 Tubby says to him, 1461 00:49:14,701 --> 00:49:16,787 "Time, Bazooka Joe? 1462 00:49:16,828 --> 00:49:17,788 That's a rather ethereal subject, 1463 00:49:17,829 --> 00:49:19,456 isn't it?" 1464 00:49:23,001 --> 00:49:24,336 And Bazooka Joe says, uh, 1465 00:49:24,378 --> 00:49:27,214 "Well, it depends on how one views time. 1466 00:49:27,255 --> 00:49:29,633 I mean, if you see time traveling in a horizontal line 1467 00:49:29,675 --> 00:49:31,593 to infinity, well, then, yes, I guess it is, 1468 00:49:31,635 --> 00:49:35,639 but outside of that, people see it broken up in segments," 1469 00:49:35,681 --> 00:49:36,807 and then Tubby comes back 1470 00:49:36,848 --> 00:49:38,308 with, I think, something pretty clever. 1471 00:49:38,350 --> 00:49:39,601 Tubby comes back and says, 1472 00:49:39,643 --> 00:49:42,729 "Yes, but wasn't it Eugene O'Neill who said, 1473 00:49:42,771 --> 00:49:44,773 'Weary am I of the tumult 1474 00:49:44,815 --> 00:49:45,983 sick of the madding crowd, 1475 00:49:46,024 --> 00:49:47,776 longing for far sea places 1476 00:49:47,818 --> 00:49:49,528 where the soul may think aloud?'" 1477 00:49:49,569 --> 00:49:51,947 And then Bazooka Joe looks at him and goes, 1478 00:49:51,989 --> 00:49:53,699 "Hey, sorry I fucking asked, okay?" 1479 00:49:53,740 --> 00:49:56,660 contemplative music 1480 00:50:01,498 --> 00:50:02,457 [Baum] I guess we all found out 1481 00:50:02,499 --> 00:50:04,251 at The Comedy Store, I think. 1482 00:50:04,292 --> 00:50:06,503 Everybody got the wind knocked out of them. 1483 00:50:06,545 --> 00:50:08,046 That was the most devastating part. 1484 00:50:08,088 --> 00:50:10,424 He was the first... 1485 00:50:10,465 --> 00:50:12,551 of "The Comedy Store generation" 1486 00:50:12,592 --> 00:50:14,136 to make it and then die. 1487 00:50:14,177 --> 00:50:15,971 [woman] Come on! You're looking good! 1488 00:50:16,013 --> 00:50:18,515 Hey, hey, mama, so are you. 1489 00:50:18,557 --> 00:50:20,017 [Allen] He was something special, 1490 00:50:20,058 --> 00:50:21,893 but he didn't realize how special he was. 1491 00:50:21,935 --> 00:50:23,186 You ever think a couple years ago, 1492 00:50:23,228 --> 00:50:24,062 when you first walked out here, that two years, 1493 00:50:24,104 --> 00:50:25,814 or a little later than that, 1494 00:50:25,856 --> 00:50:28,525 you'd be, uh, on the top-rated show in the country? 1495 00:50:28,567 --> 00:50:30,193 I didn't think it would happen this quick. 1496 00:50:30,235 --> 00:50:31,528 - [Carson] Yeah. - And I said, 1497 00:50:31,570 --> 00:50:33,613 "Well, I'll make it somehow. Hey, I know people." 1498 00:50:33,655 --> 00:50:35,657 You know. 1499 00:50:35,699 --> 00:50:37,200 I was a little jealous 1500 00:50:37,242 --> 00:50:39,536 because he went on The Tonight Show once 1501 00:50:39,578 --> 00:50:41,329 and became a millionaire. 1502 00:50:41,371 --> 00:50:44,958 He had attained what everybody was trying to get, 1503 00:50:45,000 --> 00:50:47,753 so it was a warning. 1504 00:50:47,794 --> 00:50:49,004 [Thomerson] At that young age, 1505 00:50:49,046 --> 00:50:50,672 he really had the chops 1506 00:50:50,714 --> 00:50:52,549 to hang with Sinatra 1507 00:50:52,591 --> 00:50:54,009 and Dean Martin, 1508 00:50:54,051 --> 00:50:55,427 do those roasts with all those guys. 1509 00:50:55,469 --> 00:50:57,679 I mean, he was a 21-year-old kid 1510 00:50:57,721 --> 00:50:58,889 from the Bronx. 1511 00:50:58,930 --> 00:51:01,266 It was unbelievable that he had that much talent. 1512 00:51:01,308 --> 00:51:03,268 You got the world in the palm of your hand 1513 00:51:03,310 --> 00:51:04,686 but, you know, he didn't realize it. 1514 00:51:04,728 --> 00:51:06,980 He would be the nicest guy 1515 00:51:07,022 --> 00:51:08,690 in the world. 1516 00:51:08,732 --> 00:51:10,233 You do have a baby now. Congratulations. 1517 00:51:10,275 --> 00:51:11,568 Yeah, I have a son. 1518 00:51:11,610 --> 00:51:13,820 Did you have the baby by a natural method? 1519 00:51:13,862 --> 00:51:15,030 Yeah, it was natural, uh-- 1520 00:51:15,072 --> 00:51:16,073 In--in your home, or in the hospital? 1521 00:51:16,114 --> 00:51:17,824 No, not in my home, no. 1522 00:51:17,866 --> 00:51:19,159 [host] Some people do. 1523 00:51:19,201 --> 00:51:20,952 We started out-- we worked on him at home, 1524 00:51:20,994 --> 00:51:23,246 and, uh... 1525 00:51:23,288 --> 00:51:25,707 But there was a tremendous amount of times 1526 00:51:25,749 --> 00:51:28,293 he would just come in and freak out. 1527 00:51:28,335 --> 00:51:30,253 [Winger] I would just slowly feel 1528 00:51:30,295 --> 00:51:32,422 that there was a deep sadness. 1529 00:51:32,464 --> 00:51:34,132 You know, all comedians like to feel 1530 00:51:34,174 --> 00:51:35,759 they have an open wound. 1531 00:51:35,801 --> 00:51:39,096 You just need to know that... 1532 00:51:39,137 --> 00:51:40,931 you're not alone. 1533 00:51:40,972 --> 00:51:42,599 Freddie Prinze loved drugs. 1534 00:51:42,641 --> 00:51:45,102 He was too much into them Quaaludes and all that. 1535 00:51:45,143 --> 00:51:46,436 I said, "This is getting weird." 1536 00:51:46,478 --> 00:51:48,271 You know, he thinks I'm a spy. 1537 00:51:48,313 --> 00:51:50,232 He thinks people are listening on the phone 1538 00:51:50,273 --> 00:51:52,192 because he knows who killed Kennedy. 1539 00:51:52,234 --> 00:51:53,485 And people would just say to me, 1540 00:51:53,527 --> 00:51:55,487 "You know, the two of you stupid fucks," 1541 00:51:55,529 --> 00:51:57,447 or "you're just"--you know, "you're just assholes," 1542 00:51:57,489 --> 00:51:58,782 or "he's fucking with you." 1543 00:51:58,824 --> 00:52:02,119 Nobody knew what cocaine psychosis was. 1544 00:52:02,160 --> 00:52:03,829 No, I've never been in here. 1545 00:52:03,870 --> 00:52:05,288 Everything's left the way it was? 1546 00:52:05,330 --> 00:52:06,957 This is like a time capsule. 1547 00:52:06,998 --> 00:52:10,210 That's Alan Bursky right there, on the far right. 1548 00:52:10,252 --> 00:52:12,629 Remember, he was really tight with Freddie. 1549 00:52:12,671 --> 00:52:15,632 Yeah, he was with, uh-- he gave Freddie the gun. 1550 00:52:15,674 --> 00:52:17,509 [Binder] Well, that's what they said, 1551 00:52:17,551 --> 00:52:19,469 but it turns out that he didn't, 1552 00:52:19,511 --> 00:52:20,804 according to Jimmie Walker. 1553 00:52:20,846 --> 00:52:22,097 Yeah, I don't know. 1554 00:52:22,139 --> 00:52:23,390 I--there's several stories. 1555 00:52:23,431 --> 00:52:24,724 I mean, Alan used to brag 1556 00:52:24,766 --> 00:52:26,768 that he was with him when he bought the gun. 1557 00:52:26,810 --> 00:52:28,520 I didn't give him the gun. I never-- 1558 00:52:28,562 --> 00:52:30,188 I never even owned my own gun 1559 00:52:30,230 --> 00:52:32,065 till after Freddie died. 1560 00:52:32,107 --> 00:52:33,775 [Binder] But you guys bought a gun together, you told-- 1561 00:52:33,817 --> 00:52:35,819 No, I went with him to buy the gun. 1562 00:52:35,861 --> 00:52:37,571 He comes over to my house one day, and he says, 1563 00:52:37,612 --> 00:52:39,990 "What kind of gun did James Bond have? 1564 00:52:40,031 --> 00:52:42,159 I said, "A Walther PPK," 1565 00:52:42,200 --> 00:52:43,493 and he says, "Where can I buy that?" 1566 00:52:43,535 --> 00:52:45,078 And I say, "In this town, anywhere. 1567 00:52:45,120 --> 00:52:46,413 Any sporting goods store." 1568 00:52:46,454 --> 00:52:47,789 [Binder] And who went to buy it? 1569 00:52:47,831 --> 00:52:50,083 Well, I was there, 1570 00:52:50,125 --> 00:52:52,502 and Bursky, and Freddie. 1571 00:52:52,544 --> 00:52:55,005 He had an obsession with Lenny Bruce, 1572 00:52:55,046 --> 00:52:57,340 and he had kind of a thing 1573 00:52:57,382 --> 00:52:59,134 about death and Bruce Lee. 1574 00:52:59,176 --> 00:53:00,427 Everybody tried to say, you know, 1575 00:53:00,468 --> 00:53:02,179 "It isn't"--you know, "Don't--don't do that 1576 00:53:02,220 --> 00:53:04,514 'be a star, you know, young, you know, 1577 00:53:04,556 --> 00:53:06,433 live hard young and then die.' 1578 00:53:06,474 --> 00:53:08,435 You know, don't do this rock star thing. 1579 00:53:08,476 --> 00:53:10,312 Just live a beautiful, full life. 1580 00:53:10,353 --> 00:53:11,855 - You deserve it." - Freddie would call you 1581 00:53:11,897 --> 00:53:13,231 at, like, three o'clock in the morning. 1582 00:53:13,273 --> 00:53:14,941 He'd say, "Man, I'm depressed. 1583 00:53:14,983 --> 00:53:16,234 I got a gun to my head. 1584 00:53:16,276 --> 00:53:17,527 I'm getting ready to kill myself." 1585 00:53:17,569 --> 00:53:19,070 Freddie--you know, it's, like, 4:30 in the morning. 1586 00:53:19,112 --> 00:53:20,113 He says, "Oh, no, no, no. 1587 00:53:20,155 --> 00:53:21,364 If I'm dead, you know, 1588 00:53:21,406 --> 00:53:22,532 no big deal, you know. Whatever." 1589 00:53:22,574 --> 00:53:24,117 "All right, 1590 00:53:24,159 --> 00:53:25,660 I'm coming over." 1591 00:53:25,702 --> 00:53:27,162 So you come over, 1592 00:53:27,204 --> 00:53:29,539 and there's, like, eight people there. 1593 00:53:29,581 --> 00:53:30,874 You go, "Freddie, I thought you didn't have..." 1594 00:53:30,916 --> 00:53:33,627 He says, "I just wanted to see if you would come." 1595 00:53:33,668 --> 00:53:35,962 I thought he was fucking with me! 1596 00:53:36,004 --> 00:53:37,214 I thought this was-- 1597 00:53:37,255 --> 00:53:39,216 Freddie liked practical jokes and shit. 1598 00:53:39,257 --> 00:53:40,800 It was a car wreck in slow motion 1599 00:53:40,842 --> 00:53:42,928 that people saw coming for quite some time. 1600 00:53:42,969 --> 00:53:44,846 You know what I said to him the last time I spoke to him 1601 00:53:44,888 --> 00:53:45,972 on the phone? 1602 00:53:46,014 --> 00:53:47,224 It was, you know, that-- 1603 00:53:47,265 --> 00:53:49,226 uh, a few hours before he shot himself. 1604 00:53:49,267 --> 00:53:51,436 I said to him, "You know, for the love of God, 1605 00:53:51,478 --> 00:53:53,480 you have everything 1606 00:53:53,521 --> 00:53:56,524 that me and Jay Leno and Elayne Boosler 1607 00:53:56,566 --> 00:53:58,235 are killing ourselves for. 1608 00:53:58,276 --> 00:54:00,904 What is missing from your life? 1609 00:54:00,946 --> 00:54:02,614 He says, "I don't know," 1610 00:54:02,656 --> 00:54:04,741 he says, "But I end it. I'm gonna end it now." 1611 00:54:04,783 --> 00:54:07,244 You know, I've heard this from him a thousand times. 1612 00:54:07,285 --> 00:54:09,162 And the last thing I said to him: 1613 00:54:09,204 --> 00:54:12,123 I said, "Look... 1614 00:54:12,165 --> 00:54:15,794 go in the bathroom and do it neatly." 1615 00:54:15,835 --> 00:54:17,587 And then at four o'clock in the morning, 1616 00:54:17,629 --> 00:54:19,464 my mother called me. She was in New York. 1617 00:54:19,506 --> 00:54:23,385 And she said, "Did--did Freddie have an accident?" 1618 00:54:23,426 --> 00:54:25,303 Freddie Prinze, a big success 1619 00:54:25,345 --> 00:54:26,972 at the age of 22, 1620 00:54:27,013 --> 00:54:29,224 but depressed nevertheless, 1621 00:54:29,266 --> 00:54:31,101 shot himself in the head today. 1622 00:54:31,142 --> 00:54:34,104 Tonight, the hospital says his condition is critical. 1623 00:54:34,145 --> 00:54:36,022 [man] He has sustained a single gunshot wound 1624 00:54:36,064 --> 00:54:37,274 with the bullet passing 1625 00:54:37,315 --> 00:54:38,692 completely through the temporal region. 1626 00:54:38,733 --> 00:54:40,443 Mr. Prinze remains in critical condition 1627 00:54:40,485 --> 00:54:42,195 in the intensive care unit. 1628 00:54:42,237 --> 00:54:46,241 And, uh--and he lasted 1629 00:54:46,283 --> 00:54:48,285 33 hours on life support. 1630 00:54:48,326 --> 00:54:51,496 Always be around 1631 00:54:51,538 --> 00:54:54,416 Jackson Browne's "For a Dancer" playing 1632 00:55:01,589 --> 00:55:04,467 Now you're nowhere to be found 1633 00:55:13,852 --> 00:55:18,315 I don't know what happens when people die 1634 00:55:18,356 --> 00:55:21,651 Can't seem to grasp it, as hard as I try 1635 00:55:21,693 --> 00:55:22,819 It's like a song 1636 00:55:22,861 --> 00:55:24,154 [Allen] The people I've met here 1637 00:55:24,195 --> 00:55:25,947 and the people who've become friends here 1638 00:55:25,989 --> 00:55:27,073 could only happen here, 1639 00:55:27,115 --> 00:55:29,284 and those personalities are so unique, 1640 00:55:29,326 --> 00:55:31,328 but that was--that was one 1641 00:55:31,369 --> 00:55:34,789 that just, you know, broke my heart, you know, 1642 00:55:34,831 --> 00:55:37,667 because he was, uh-- he was one of my heroes. 1643 00:55:37,709 --> 00:55:42,422 Crying as they ease you down 1644 00:55:42,464 --> 00:55:45,508 Freddie was so good to me, but Freddie was... 1645 00:55:45,550 --> 00:55:47,761 was kind of on a self-destructive kind of thing, 1646 00:55:47,802 --> 00:55:50,347 Well, I was too. I think that's kind of why I... 1647 00:55:50,388 --> 00:55:53,600 why, you know, I related to him. 1648 00:55:53,641 --> 00:55:55,518 Right on dancing 1649 00:55:55,560 --> 00:55:58,188 No matter what fate chooses to play 1650 00:55:58,229 --> 00:56:01,816 There's nothing you can do about it anyway 1651 00:56:01,858 --> 00:56:04,361 [Leno] And there was sort of that reflected glory. 1652 00:56:04,402 --> 00:56:05,695 "Yeah, I knew Freddie. Yeah, yeah. 1653 00:56:05,737 --> 00:56:06,905 Oh, yeah, we started out together." 1654 00:56:06,946 --> 00:56:08,698 You know, everybody at the Store 1655 00:56:08,740 --> 00:56:10,200 who had ever shared the stage 1656 00:56:10,241 --> 00:56:13,036 or been on a stage with him at the same evening-- 1657 00:56:13,078 --> 00:56:14,371 there's a kinship. 1658 00:56:14,412 --> 00:56:15,997 I had just turned 18. 1659 00:56:16,039 --> 00:56:17,207 I had just gotten out here 1660 00:56:17,248 --> 00:56:19,542 maybe the week Freddie Prinze killed himself. 1661 00:56:19,584 --> 00:56:20,710 I didn't know any of them. 1662 00:56:20,752 --> 00:56:22,379 I had just been made a regular. 1663 00:56:22,420 --> 00:56:24,506 They were all so close to him, and he was-- 1664 00:56:24,547 --> 00:56:26,341 you know, he was a big success, 1665 00:56:26,383 --> 00:56:27,592 and they looked up to him. 1666 00:56:27,634 --> 00:56:29,969 It changes the whole dynamic of the place. 1667 00:56:30,011 --> 00:56:31,054 They were devastated. 1668 00:56:31,096 --> 00:56:33,932 Leno and Johnny Dark and Boosler. 1669 00:56:33,973 --> 00:56:35,975 - [Maron] Mm. - [Binder] Mule Deer. 1670 00:56:36,017 --> 00:56:38,019 Thomerson. 1671 00:56:38,061 --> 00:56:40,438 With Mitzi, crying. 1672 00:56:40,480 --> 00:56:42,607 And they'd go on stage. You know, they'd do their job. 1673 00:56:42,649 --> 00:56:44,234 They'd make people laugh. 1674 00:56:44,275 --> 00:56:45,402 And it's the first time I realized 1675 00:56:45,443 --> 00:56:46,986 what The Comedy Store was. 1676 00:56:47,028 --> 00:56:49,030 Wasn't just a nightclub. It wasn't just a building. 1677 00:56:49,072 --> 00:56:50,031 It was home. 1678 00:56:50,073 --> 00:56:53,201 It's what unites a whole bunch of us 1679 00:56:53,243 --> 00:56:56,871 who live all throughout the world. 1680 00:56:56,913 --> 00:57:00,750 That's--that's the thing that unites us all, 1681 00:57:00,792 --> 00:57:04,629 our time at The Comedy Store. 1682 00:57:04,671 --> 00:57:07,757 - [applause, whistling] - Thank you. 1683 00:57:07,799 --> 00:57:10,802 My luck's gonna run out sometime. 1684 00:57:10,844 --> 00:57:13,263 Freddie just said, "My luck's gonna run out sometime." 1685 00:57:13,304 --> 00:57:14,973 No, it's not. It's going good for you. 1686 00:57:15,014 --> 00:57:16,808 Those are funny--that's gonna become a tagline of yours. 1687 00:57:16,850 --> 00:57:19,477 That's not my job, man. That's not my job. 1688 00:57:19,519 --> 00:57:20,645 - Yeah. - Going very well. 1689 00:57:20,687 --> 00:57:21,604 You have Mr. Kelly's. Now, that's-- 1690 00:57:21,646 --> 00:57:22,689 that's a step up, isn't it? 1691 00:57:22,730 --> 00:57:24,190 Yeah. Last time I worked there, 1692 00:57:24,232 --> 00:57:25,608 I was in the kitchen. 1693 00:57:25,650 --> 00:57:28,278 [laughter, applause] 1694 00:57:31,489 --> 00:57:32,699 Keep a fire... 1695 00:57:32,740 --> 00:57:33,867 That's not your job, man. 1696 00:57:33,908 --> 00:57:35,785 - It's not my job. - Not your job. 1697 00:57:35,827 --> 00:57:40,290 Let your prayers go drifting into space 1698 00:57:40,331 --> 00:57:45,378 You never know what will be coming down 1699 00:57:49,924 --> 00:57:53,928 Perhaps a better world is drawing near 1700 00:57:53,970 --> 00:57:57,307 Along with whatever meaning 1701 00:57:57,348 --> 00:57:59,976 You might have found 1702 00:58:03,521 --> 00:58:06,191 Don't let the uncertainty 1703 00:58:06,232 --> 00:58:07,775 Turn you around 1704 00:58:07,817 --> 00:58:09,819 The world keeps turning around and around 1705 00:58:09,861 --> 00:58:14,157 Go on and make a joyful sound 1706 00:58:14,199 --> 00:58:18,953 Into a dancer you have grown 1707 00:58:18,995 --> 00:58:22,624 From a seed somebody else has thrown