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[opening theme music plays]
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[siren blaring]
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[horn honks]
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[siren blaring]
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[tires screech]
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[snoring]
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[snoring continues]
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[gasps]
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[groaning, panting]
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[grunting]
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[Shifty] Jackpot!
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I landed the big one!
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A fresh coat of paint
and I can sell this for a fortune
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at my pawn shop.
[chuckles]
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Huh?
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[screams]
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Mr. Buyyourstuff,
can you tell us exactly
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what you believe you saw
this afternoon?
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I was fishing for bargains
when, out of nowhere,
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a beast as big as an island
of gently used merchandise
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located conveniently
on the corner of 7th and Main,
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rushed my boat.
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It was the Quacken!
The Quacken!
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Shifty's Pawn Shop! Open Sundays!
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Sailors tell stories of a giant monster
they call the Quacken.
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The Quacken? It's horrifying!
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It destroys anything in its path!
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And while there have been
no confirmed sightings of the beast,
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many still believe in its existence.
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In unrelated news,
world renowned archaeologist
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and adventurer Jessica Sharpe
made an unexpected stop here today.
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What brought her here?
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We'll interrupt your programs
to keep you informed.
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[tense music]
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[grunts]
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Whoa! You're welcome to use the door.
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I try to make a habit
of never taking the easy way.
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Good afternoon, gentlemen, I'm Jessica--
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Sharpe! Everyone knows who you are!
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[Duke] Jessica Sharpe.
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Born on the wrong side
of the tracks.
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You graduated
from Smarterthan University
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at the age of 20
with a degree in Adventure.
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Currently recognized
as the world's
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greatest archaeologist
and treasure hunter.
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Welcome to our city, Ms. Sharpe.
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You boys do your homework.
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So you must know why I'm here?
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-Uh...
-Hm...
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I seek the Quaken and need your help
to bring it to justice.
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We can't get involved.
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It's outside our jurisdiction
and, technically,
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the Quacken's done
nothing wrong.
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He's right. No can do.
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Unless the Quacken's attackin' your plan,
we can't be backin'.
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What are you all talking about?
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The Quacken doesn't exist.
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It most certainly does
and I'm going to prove it.
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You sure you won't join me?
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You'll be missing out
on a lot of fame and fortune.
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We're here to protect this city
from danger, not seek it out.
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Suit yourselves, gentlemen.
I'll do it.
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[grunts]
With or without you.
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I'm with Jessica Sharpe,
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adventure-seeker and overcomer
of impossible obstacles.
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Jessica, what brought you
to our city so abruptly?
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I'm here to finally give proof
to the existence of the Quacken
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by capturing and bringing it
back here to the city.
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Wow! How do you intend to do that?
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I had hoped for police assistance,
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but it seems I'll have to find
a different team.
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But fear not, if I have to,
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I will find the Quacken
and drag it back by myself!
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Cut! You were great!
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So inspiring.
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You know, if you need a crew,
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I'd start with Captain Facepatch
and the Guardian of the Oceans.
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Captain who and the what now?
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[Facepatch] Mop, people, mop!
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The deck must be spic and span
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before we break
for a spot of tea
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and a civil discourse
on Renaissance poetry.
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-Ooh, ooh. Can't wait!
-I prefer mopping!
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[Jessica] Ahoy there!
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Who amongst you has the courage
to face the Quacken?
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No, thank you.
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It swallows armadas for breakfast!
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I would but I have
a dentist appointment tomorrow.
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Think of the fame and fortune.
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None of you are up
to the challenge?
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-[Gabby] I'll join your crew.
-Gabby?
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I've always wanted
a life of adventure.
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I can make news and report on it
at the same time.
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Are you sayin' that this here Quacken hunt
is gonna be televised?
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Every second of it.
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Oh! Then count us in!
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Everyone, we're going to be
on the telly!
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Now, back to work!
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The ship must
be impeccably polished.
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Spit spot!
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[Surly] Who made this guy captain?
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[Facepatch]
We're now in the exact location
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the Quacken was last spotted.
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[Jessica] Excellent.
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The plan is to lure it
by gobbling like scared turkeys
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and throwing a giant piece
of toast overboard
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as both are well known
Quacken attractors.
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I've spotted it! The Quacken!
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[ominous music]
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This is Gabby Tocamera
live aboard the Guardian of the Oceans.
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As you can see,
we have located the Quacken!
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I did it! I found the Quacken!
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Now to capture the beast!
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Keep your cameras rolling, Gabby.
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What are you doing?
Isn't this enough!
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You wanted proof,
and now you have it!
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I'll do it. With or without you.
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[panting]
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Oh.
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I guess I'll have to capture
the Quacken by myself!
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[grunts]
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What are you doing?
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You're taking us too close
to the rocks!
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I didn't come this far
to turn back now!
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[groaning]
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We are in pursuit of the beast!
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Any moment now, we'll be face to face
with the monster!
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[wailing]
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[growling]
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There it is! The Quaken!
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[all screaming]
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It's terrifying!
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It's ferocious! It's...
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-[all gasp]
-A giant rubber duck?
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What? It's rubber?
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It's not a monster.
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-[crew 1] Eh, that's not so bad.
-[Surly] Not a big deal.
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[crew 2] One of those
lives in my bath tub.
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[crew 3]
That's actually kinda cute.
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[crew 4] Well, yellow still
makes me anxious.
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[Facepatch]
Ms. Sharpe, I implore you!
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Take this ship to safety!
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I let my ambition
get the best of me,
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and now, I've put
this entire crew in danger.
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I can fix this.
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[gasps]
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[grunts]
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[suspenseful music]
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[groaning]
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-[rubber duck squeaks]
-[all screaming]
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[Facepatch] The Quacken!
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Oh, no.
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In an attempt
to capture the Quacken,
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Jessica Sharpe has accidentally
sent it on a collision course
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with the harbor.
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[Gabby] Its impact
will no doubt be devastating.
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What have I done?
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I'm Gabby Tocamera,
Breaking News!
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Ms. Sharpe ignored
all of our warnings,
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and now, she's brought
a true crisis to the city.
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You gotta admit, though,
a giant rubber duck
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unleashing havoc on the city?
That's a totally rad crisis!
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I have a plan.
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I need a Sky Police helicopter
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and the world's greatest cop
that isn't me.
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Because the only way to stop
a giant floating monster...
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is with a giant floating hero.
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[Grizzled] I'm approaching
the Cubby Balloon.
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[Duke] Do you remember the plan?
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I'm not that old.
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[Grizzled] Push the Cubby
Balloon to intercept the Quacken
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before it reaches the city.
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Are you sure you want me
to do this?
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I realize by sending Cubby
out to sea,
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we may never see him again.
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But that is a sacrifice
we must be willing to make
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to save the city.
[sighs sharply]
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Do it.
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Good luck and goodbye,
old friend.
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It's too fast!
We can't catch it!
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We'll never stop it
from crashing into the city!
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We can see the city
on the horizon!
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I estimate impact
in less than two minutes!
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There it is!
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See? I was telling the truth...
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And I'll happily recount my tale
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with any purchase made
at Shifty's Pawn Shop.
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Open daily nine to five!
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Huh?
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The air current coming in
off the water
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is making it hard
to control the helicopter...
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and Cubby!
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[wind whooshing]
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[grunts]
I've gotta turn back!
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[Grizzled] I can't fight
these shifting winds!
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[car engine revving]
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-[tires screeching]
-[grunts]
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There goes out last hope.
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Look! The Quacken!
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-[quacks]
-[girls screaming]
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[all screaming]
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[dramatic music]
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-[Shifty] Look, again!
-All right!
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Get him, Cubby!
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[Gabby] We're in city harbor
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where Cubby is challenging
the Quacken
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to a monster beatdown.
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Who will be victorious?
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[rubber duck squeaks]
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That be it?
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Disappointed, I be.
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[cheering]
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[crowd] Cubby! Cubby! Cubby!
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[grunts]
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The Quacken went that way,
Ms. Sharpe.
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Don't you have some chasing
to do?
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Please, call me Jessie.
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And I admit,
I've been terribly reckless
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in my need to capture
the Quacken.
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I was only thinking
about fame and fortune,
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and wasn't considering the
well-being of the good people
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of this wonderful city.
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Sounds like
you learned a valuable lesson.
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Adventuring isn't only
about what you have to gain,
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but what you have to lose.
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To succeed,
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sometimes, we have to
make enormous sacrifices.
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[Duke] Isn't that right, Cubby?
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Welcome home, buddy!
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[Facepatch] Come on, men!
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Let's follow Cubby
back into the city
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for a night
of polite celebration
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and reasonably portioned meals.
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[all crew] Huzzah!
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Are these pirate outfits
ours to keep?
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[Gabby] And so concludes
Breaking News.
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I'm Gabby Tocamera,
and I'm looking forward
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to transitioning back
to full-time news anchor
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00:10:56,251 --> 00:10:58,251
behind my nice, dry desk.
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Shifty's Pawn Shop!
Open Sundays!
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[closing theme music plays]