(SPEAKING IN SPANISH)
I want to stay married. It's the vow that I took.
I want to stay married.
Heading back to Atlanta feels different this time.
Pedro wants a separation
but I don't know what a separation means...
..so when I get home
that's going to be the hardest thing to deal with.
Pedro and I didn't talk at all on the way home,
not on the plane, not in the car, nothing.
I don't get it.
Why doesn't my husband want to take interest in me
after all this effort I've put into saving our marriage?
I think that more space is the last thing we need.
We need to be working on our communication
and growing together.
He wants to grow separately, that doesn't make any sense.
We're married.
I do not come from a broken home.
I have no experience with seeing separation in my own family
so I don't have any point of reference for this.
I don't know what's to become of us.
I haven't given up hope yet.
I have given up effort.
But I haven't given up hope.
(SPEAKING IN SPANISH)
Sometimes I have thought like Lidia is kind of jealous
that Nicole has found her happiness in a relationship.
Also that Lidia has never gotten her life
because she's an unhappy woman
and she wants Nicole to have the same miserable life
that she has.
(SPEAKING IN SPANISH)
I made myself clear like it's now or never,
just take it or leave it. It's your family or me.
(SPEAKING IN SPANISH)
2 00:10:31.320 -- 00:10:36.760 align:middle line:73% position:50% Being in the house with Pedro feels, it's so eerie
because even though he's in a different room,
I've always been lonely.
He was either badgering me
or not talking to me and ignoring me.
I would go to sleep alone and wake up alone
so when he moved into a different room
it didn't feel any different.
The only thing is this is a separation
and it's sad.
He wants this separation.
It just is one more step towards divorce
and if that's what really he wants.
Does he really just want to divorce and is he just too scared to say it?
(SPEAKING IN SPANISH)
Things are still really terrible between Pedro and I.
We don't talk.
We see each other in passing and nobody says a thing.
But each day that my husband is still in the house
it makes me feel like he will want to work things out when he's ready.
Maybe he does deep down inside even though he doesn't show it,
feel that there is some value in our marriage in our relationship.
Hey girl. Hey. How are you?
Since coming back from the DR,
I haven't talked to my family about what happened.
Destiny is the only person that I've really been confiding in
about my marriage.
So how did it go?
Well after I got to the DR
I immediately decided to, before going to my hotel,
meet up with Lidia.
Well actually I just knocked on her door.
So she didn't know you were coming at all?
Mm mm but luckily she invited me in and was really...
That's promising. ..surprisingly nice.
That's the best outcome we could have hoped for.
I wanted to reach out an olive branch to her
and I explained to her that you know
after being with Pedro for so many years
that now I am more open to understanding their culture.
Yeah.
And I presented her with a gift of sunglasses.
What kind of sunglasses? Gucci.
You don't also want to be known as like when things are going wrong
that you're like throwing gifts and money but OK.
I thought it was a nice gesture.
Yeah but like regular sunglasses not like Gucci but OK, it's OK.
It's done and over with we can't take them back
so we're here.
I bought her a laptop before and it's been a part of her culture
you know, that you bring a gift when you're coming from America
to her country
so I wanted to respect the culture by giving her a gift.
Yeah.
because it has been reiterated to me time and time again that you know,
I wasn't really OK with it
because I thought we're coming to see you.
I mean. Yeah.
We're coming to spend time with you. We're the gift.
But after being educated on that
by Pedro
I decided that it would be a good gesture
to honour the culture and bring Lidia a gift
so I brought her some sunglasses.
We talked about what's going on between Pedro and I and...
Did you tell her that he's like at work all the time
and hanging out with his work friends?
I told her that he works into the late night
and that I never see him and it's like I go to bed alone
and I wake up alone
and I'm basically missing my husband.
I'm lonely and I told her this
and she seemed to sympathise with me on that
and wanted to encourage me.
Well that's good.
I don't think that the point of the trip
was for it to per se work
and rebuild their marriage and fix everything.
I think the point of that trip was to reconcile with his mum
and to bridge that gap and that worked.
So I'm big on baby steps.
That was a baby step in the right direction
so we've got to, we've got to take you know, baby steps
and not try to outrun and try to get to the finish line.
Just take one step forward, one step at a time.
The next day, Pedro comes in.
His mum called him and told him what I was doing.
He flew all the way over there to confront you.
He's so extra.
He goes on to explain
that I should have told her the entire story.
I didn't tell her the entire story for fear of bad mouthing...
You're trying to protect him. Right, yeah.
He decided that he wanted us to go out with his mum
and tell her the entire story.
Everything that came out was ugly.
That's what he asked me to do.
She stayed nonbiased which was good.
Yeah because she didn't have to because that's her son.
Pedro reiterated to me that he still wants the separation
and so I got up and I left.
He's not even sleeping in the same bed with me.
he doesn't want to talk.
He doesn't want to work on anything right now.
He doesn't want to see me at all.
He doesn't like he told me he doesn't like it
when I wait up at night for him and sit on the couch
even if all I say is "how was your day?"
If he needs to be alone
then maybe that's what you need to do
and you just need to give him his space.
You're going to end up driving him away
because you're wanting the old relationship
and the old things that he used to do
and he just doesn't have it in him.
It has been hard for me
and I have been unsuccessful in giving Pedro any sort of space
like he wants although he has moved into the other bedroom
I will be crying at his door at night
and begging for a relationship and he is not responsive to that.
In fact I do believe it probably has done harm to our relationship.
I really feel desperate.
I can't give him the space because of the unknown.
Is the space going to last three weeks
or is it going to last three months
or is it going to last a whole year or more?
What is the end goal?
Are you thinking that you want space to prepare for divorce
or do you think that you want the space
to clear your head to come back together?
What do you want?
I want my husband.
Yeah.
I know... I want to wake up one day
and for this all to be a terrible dream.
I want to go to sleep
and I want for my husband to walk inside...
..and kiss me on the cheek.
I can't.
I put on a really good front in front of her
but I'm heartbroken that she is continually crying.
I don't know what we'll do if this marriage doesn't work.
I think it will work. It has to work.
He doesn't care about the work that I put in anymore
like he doesn't care about my tears.
Stop showing them to him.
Because at this point he doesn't deserve them.
You need to gather yourself and wait till you can have communication
without the tears.
It's hard to be in my room... I know.
So why don't you move in one of the guest rooms?
You've got to recognise those triggers.
That might be a good idea actually.
You've got to sit here and say OK if I can't sleep in our bed
then I'm going to go to another bed.
I want my husband.
I want my marriage and I feel like I will do anything for it.
Yeah. I know.
2 00:23:39.160 -- 00:23:41.520 align:middle line:90% position:50% Hi. Hi. Attorney Hinkson.
Nice to meet you.
You can have a seat.
Yes.
So OK...
you guys got married in March of 2016 is that correct?
Yes. With a K-1 Visa is that correct?
And then after you got married when did you get your Green Card?
Six months OK.
Do you recall if your wife filed what's called an affidavit
of support?
OK. Divorce does not change the financial obligation.
Yes until either ten years as far as your work history
or until you become a US citizen.
OK you never technically speaking leave a marriage with nothing
which again is another you know false factor that people have
when they don't believe that they're citizens that matters.
It does in regards to the way of a divorce.
My initial thoughts in regards to Pedro's case
is that he's entitled to certain things
regardless of your immigration status.
It's unfortunate that when you come over here
that a lot of people think that you're doing it
with ill intentions.
I think that knowing your rights,
him understanding what he can and can't get is important.
Now is it your desire to move forward at any point
with US citizenship? Yes.
OK. Have you and your wife started that process?
OK once you've been in the United States for five years
whether you're married or not
you could still file for citizenship.
OK.
Who her family says that all the time about you?
Yeah. OK.
So no because at this point you're at the five-year mark.
The longer that you are here,
not only for immigration purposes shows your dedication
but I mean I would hope that it would have shown dedication
to her family as far as you're in this for the right reasons.
There's two types of divorces,
there's what we call uncontested and contested.
Uncontested matters from our firm starts at five thousand dollars.
Contested matters at my law firm starts at ten thousand dollars OK?
A retainer, an initial retainer?
That's what the initial retainer is.
Yes ten thousand dollars.
Divorces are like a death, right?
It is essentially the end of what you thought your future
was going to be.
So people say all the time you can file this
and you know I'm not going to divorce you.
We're going to, you know, I'm going to stay,
we're going to stay married forever that's not the case.
Once you file a divorce and that person is served,
you have 30 days to respond.
If you do not respond within 30 days
then we could then go to the court
and say this person didn't respond
we want to proceed with the divorce and it still happens.
It's not easy
but you have to make a determination on what's important to you.
Your mother wants to leave this up against the wall.
Be careful with that.
Hey don't try to show off River. Don't try to show off.
Chop chop we're wasting time.
I went ahead and I got the baby grand piano.
It's finally here. This is my big day.
My big day. Yes.
And I can't wait to get that baby in this house.
River's come down to help me and help with the delivery.
I'm so excited.
Oh that's a big piano right there. Yeah.
This is a bad mama jama.
We do have a musical family and our kids love music.
River is the lyricist and Royal... He can play yes.
..he plays every instrument on the planet.
Winter sings but she also plays the flute.
Yes. And Chantel played viola.
The viola yes.
Let me see what's going on here.
There so what dad and I we're the first ones
to know about this piano?
Chantel actually knew about the piano.
I took her to the antique shop to kind of cheer her up.
You know she and Pedro they're having some issues.
Chantel and Pedro are definitely on our minds
since she's back from the DR.
The last thing she said to me
was that she and Pedro are about to separate
and I haven't heard anything else from her
but I was shocked to hear that.
They didn't go to a marriage retreat.
Where'd they go then?
Your sister she went to the Dominican Republic
to get advice from Pedro's mother.
Pedro, he's talking about separating.
That's crazy.
Well Chantel said that's what he said because I need to grow.
Well I think Chantel needs to just go her separate way
if he's talking about he wants to separate let the man go.
If somebody wants to leave you they have already left.
That's how I feel about the situation.
If he's saying he wants to separate
and he wants to get his own apartment, let him go.
You shouldn't want to be with somebody
that's always one foot out the door with you.
That's the truth.
Now you should never want to be with somebody
that always has one foot out the door
because they have their problems
and you know it's like something that could be fixed
it would be fixed. There'll be effort.
There'll be effort from both sides trying to fix trying to compromise
but if somebody just saying they want to you know,
get their own apartment especially if you've been married
five years, six years,
now that's I don't know that's shocking to me.
I believe that Chantel might be embarrassed
that's the reason why she wouldn't talk to us
because we kind of told her to take things slow
and it seemed like things are coming in fruition
that we spoke about earlier.
I'm going to tell you why Chantel didn't tell us,
because she doesn't want to separate
so she's going to try to talk to people that can help
and I feel like in her mind she's like,
"Oh they probably want Pedro to stay in the marriage
"because he, we send him back there
"he's not going to be able to sending money around
"like he is", you know, so he probably went there to...
No, no, no the sister always said,
the sister always said "divorce, divorce".
That's what she always said.
If he wants to separate because he was here for a Green Card
we all said it.
From the start.
It wasn't about being here with Chantel.
He just wanted to be here.
I have not talked to Chantel since the night she came to my house
and I haven't talked to Pedro in a long time.
For a second I thought that things was alright.
I thought he was a cool guy for a second.
But now they I'm hearing all this stuff it's like hold on now.
Pedro's who I thought he was all along.
You know if you're dealing with somebody
that doesn't want to be with you you need to just cut ties.
I don't want anybody have to... Be used and...
..be used and abused.
For someone to try to destroy a person
that risked everything to help them
then that same person that you love and that you clung to and helped...
Right.
..and had their back for over six years
turns on that person and tries to completely annihilate them
that is... That's messed up.
..jacked up.
This would be very upsetting and very crazy
if Pedro is using Chantel and the plan has worked.
That means the wool has been pulled over everybody's eyes.
2 00:33:46.760 -- 00:33:47.760 align:middle line:75% position:50% (SPEAKING IN SPANISH)
Hey.
How was work?
I know I haven't respected your space.
Pedro, he can't even look straight in my eyes
and he tells me that he wants a divorce.
I wonder what that is about a person
when they can't look you straight in the eyes.
I wonder what that is.
Why? Are you guilty of something?
I didn't expect for you to say that you wanted a divorce from me.
I really just wanted to know if you valued this marriage
and were willing to work on it and the answer's no.
So there's nothing more we need to discuss.
I cannot think of anything I have done
that warrants having Pedro ask me for a divorce.
We just started the separation.
I'm starting to believe that he's just wanted to be single
this whole time and hasn't had the guts to tell me.
What more could I do?
I've given you honesty. I've given you trust.
I've given my whole self to you.
I brought you here when everybody else told me
you were scamming me
I didn't listen to them and I trusted in you.
I trusted him.
I trusted my husband
because he told me that he would not leave me.
He told me that.
He told me he would never do that.
That's what he said and I believed it
and all the while like I'm just confused.
I really can't believe this.
I just want to hurt you back because I feel hurt by you.
He told me he wanted a divorce
and then he just woke me up
and there was a truck outside
and he said he's moving into his apartment.
Wow. What?
That's cruel.
Chantel needs to protect herself and her interests.
I really wouldn't have wanted to really be Pedro right now.
Foul things have a way of coming full circle.
Chantel?
(SPEAKING IN SPANISH)
It is my time to take care of myself.
This is the last thing that I can do for me.
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