1
00:00:02,085 --> 00:00:02,127
.

2
00:00:02,377 --> 00:00:03,212
‐ Alexa, what's the temperature
in Sacramento?

3
00:00:05,506 --> 00:00:08,008
‐ The weather today
in Sacramento is sunny

4
00:00:08,008 --> 00:00:10,844
with a forecasted high
of 71 degrees.

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‐ That's my capital city.

6
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Alexa, play a song
about Sacramento, California.

7
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‐ I'm sorry.

8
00:00:17,476 --> 00:00:20,270
I don't know any songs
about Sacramento, California.

9
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‐ Whoa.
Then let's make one up.

10
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♪ I'm packing for the Sac' ♪

11
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♪ Sweet Sacramento ♪

12
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♪ There's no takin' it back ♪

13
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♪ Do me right, Sacramento ♪

14
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♪ Ho, yeah ♪

15
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Alexa, what's the population‐‐

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‐ Sorry, Arpi.

17
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I really need to get
my kids' breakfast now.

18
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‐ Of course.
Sorry, Alexa.

19
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I'm just excited
'cause I'm going to‐‐

20
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‐ Sacramento.
I know.

21
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Jeez.

22
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[bright music]

23
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♪ ♪

24
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‐ The parks department
finally cleaned

25
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the bat guano
off the Hollywood sign

26
00:00:59,309 --> 00:01:01,895
and returned it
to its original orange color.

27
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‐ Sorry I'm late.
‐ Good morning, Mr. Mayor.

28
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How was your weekend?

29
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‐ Oh, I had a fantastic weekend
with Orly.

30
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We went to Huntington Gardens
for the honey festival.

31
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‐ So nice.

32
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Okay, uh, where was I?

33
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‐ They have this thing
where you get to decorate

34
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a little tote bag,

35
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and then you get
to keep the tote bag.

36
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‐ Your life is a movie, sir.
‐ Next item.

37
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Uh, this is a heat map
of violent crimes and‐‐

38
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Sir, you're AirPlaying
your phone.

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‐ I know.

40
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I wanna show everybody
a picture of the tote bag.

41
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‐ Ooh, a bee apartment.

42
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‐ Okay, uh, other items
while we wait.

43
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Deputy Mayor Meskimen
and Mr. Kwapis

44
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will be driving up
to Sacramento

45
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to present our
anti‐oil‐drilling initiative.

46
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‐ Los Angeles has over
a thousand drilling sites,

47
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many within a hundred yards
of schools and homes.

48
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I was pleasantly shocked

49
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when Mayor Bremer
agreed with my plan‐‐

50
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‐ Oil's dumb.

51
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We're California.

52
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We should be leading the way
on this stuff.

53
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Solar power, wind,
fire power‐‐

54
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Is that a thing?
'Cause fires we got.

55
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‐ If I can convince
the governor

56
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to prioritize the health
of our communities‐‐

57
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‐ Oh, there it is.
[chuckles] Tote bag.

58
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‐ Oh, she is majestic.

59
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‐ [laughs]
[cell phone ringing]

60
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Wait, what's happening?

61
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‐ I think your daughter's
school is calling.

62
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‐ It's a phone call, sir.
‐ Oh, yeah. Hello.

63
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‐ You have to turn your phone
off AirPlay, sir.

64
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‐ No, the screen
is the phone now.

65
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Hello. Mayor Bremer here.

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‐ Hello?
Can you hear the mayor?

67
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‐ Suspended?
That doesn't sound like Orly.

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All right.
I'll be right there.

69
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‐ Sir?

70
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Sir, quick question.
‐ Not now, Jayden.

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‐ I'm scared to be in a car
with Ms. Meskimen.

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‐ You'll be fine.

73
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‐ But the trip
is six hours, sir,

74
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and I don't know
what we're gonna talk about.

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‐ Jayden, how am I the one
you're asking about this?

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‐ You're the only one
I can walk as fast as.

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‐ Ask her questions
about herself.

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People love
talking about themselves.

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‐ Great.
What kind of questions?

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‐ I don't know‐‐
uh, icebreakers,

81
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conversation starters.

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You know, Google it,
for crying out loud.

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‐ Will do.

84
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And somebody turned on
the long legs.

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[panting]

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‐ Here at Gregory,
we take online behavior

87
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as seriously
as we do sock height.

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And it seems Orly
is part of a group

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that was using social media
to bully a teacher.

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‐ Can children bully adults?

91
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'Cause in my day,

92
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teachers could hit us
with a closed fist.

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[foot thumps]
Ow.

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‐ Allow me to read a few
of the offending comments.

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"Ms. Adams is like if the water

96
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at the top of a yogurt
were a person."

97
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"Ms. Adams took a DNA test.

98
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Turns out,
she's 100% russet potato."

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‐ [laughs]
Like the song.

100
00:03:27,249 --> 00:03:29,626
No, of course.
That's‐‐that is terrible.

101
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‐ But my posts
are all defending Ms. Adams.

102
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Guys, stop.

103
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I think it's feminist

104
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that she dances alone
at our formals.

105
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You're wrong.

106
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It's so brave that she brought
her gerbils on Family Day.

107
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If Ms. Adams were a man,
society would praise her

108
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for having
a front bulge in her pants.

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‐ That's enough, Orly.

110
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‐ Sorry, Ms. Adams.

111
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‐ You're Ms. Adams?

112
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Is what I tell people,
'cause I know that.

113
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Look, Ms. Adams,
Orly was just being kind.

114
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Don't you think the other girls
are to blame here?

115
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‐ Fair enough.

116
00:04:03,577 --> 00:04:05,829
Orly, you are not suspended.

117
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‐ [sighs] Thank you, Ms. Adams.
‐ Oh.

118
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Yes, thank you, Ms. Adams,
and can I just say,

119
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I love what you're doing
with the white stripe.

120
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‐ Don't.
‐ Oh, yes.

121
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I was touched by a ghost.

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‐ Yup.
Well, um, goodbye.

123
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I knew I didn't have
to worry about you.

124
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You're a good kid.
Proud of you.

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‐ Since I'm such a good kid,
can I have money

126
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to go to the movies
with Ceviche later?

127
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‐ [chuckles]
What are you guys seeing?

128
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‐ "Stab Massacre 2."

129
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‐ "Stab Massacre 2"?

130
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No way.

131
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Scary movies
give you nightmares.

132
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You remember when the guy
in front of you on the plane

133
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was watching "It"

134
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and then we had to cancel
your birthday party?

135
00:04:41,448 --> 00:04:43,575
Come on.
‐ Okay, fine.

136
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But I'm keeping the hundo.

137
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[smooches]

138
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‐ Just like her mother.

139
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♪ ♪

140
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‐ Sorry I don't have a radio.

141
00:04:58,799 --> 00:05:00,801
It got stolen by the guys
that live in my car at night.

142
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‐ It's fine.
I got a lot on my mind.

143
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♪ ♪

144
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‐ So I'm making coffee.
Would you like some?

145
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‐ What's that now?

146
00:05:11,478 --> 00:05:14,439
‐ I mean, um,
what is your dream day?

147
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‐ Honestly?
This.

148
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Taking an important issue
to the governor,

149
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serving my constituency.

150
00:05:19,569 --> 00:05:21,905
Now, normally, the deputy mayor
would not be dispatched

151
00:05:21,905 --> 00:05:23,323
to do a job this big,

152
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so either the mayor
does not know this,

153
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or else he's giving me rope
to hang myself.

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Tomorrow will either
be the greatest

155
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or worst day of my life.

156
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‐ What's your favorite
salty food?

157
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‐ Bran flakes.

158
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They have more sodium
than you think.

159
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‐ What do you value most
in a friendship?

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‐ Mutual respect,
sacrifice,

161
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similar milk preferences.

162
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‐ Wow, you gave
all your answers so fast.

163
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‐ I think it's important

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to know your stance
on everything.

165
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‐ Well, I got the best kid
in all of Los Angeles.

166
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‐ That's great, sir.

167
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We have a budget meeting
in two minutes.

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‐ A bunch of girls were
making fun of a potato teacher

169
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on Instagram media,

170
00:05:59,985 --> 00:06:02,821
but Orly was saying
nice things in her postings.

171
00:06:02,821 --> 00:06:05,490
‐ Huh,
I follow Orly on Instagram,

172
00:06:05,490 --> 00:06:08,201
and she hasn't posted anything
about any teachers.

173
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‐ Really?
‐ Mm.

174
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‐ Sir, did you happen to catch
the screen name on her post?

175
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By the circle, sir.

176
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‐ Uh, something with a P.
I don't‐‐

177
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‐ Mm, the account she gave me
is OrlyBGrammin.

178
00:06:17,627 --> 00:06:19,963
‐ [gasps] She has a Finsta.
‐ What's a Finsta?

179
00:06:19,963 --> 00:06:22,465
‐ Um, it's just an account
that kids make

180
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under a fake name
so they can post silly things

181
00:06:24,467 --> 00:06:25,886
they don't want
their parents to see.

182
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‐ I wanna see it.
Tell her to let me see it.

183
00:06:28,221 --> 00:06:31,725
‐ Uh, bad idea, sir.
A little separation is healthy.

184
00:06:31,725 --> 00:06:33,476
‐ Orly and I
don't have secrets.

185
00:06:33,476 --> 00:06:36,730
I read her the American Girl
Doll puberty book.

186
00:06:36,730 --> 00:06:38,398
It was so gross, but I did it.

187
00:06:38,398 --> 00:06:40,400
When she told me
her celebrity crush,

188
00:06:40,400 --> 00:06:42,027
I stood with her
in the front row

189
00:06:42,027 --> 00:06:43,236
of a Shawn Mendes concert.

190
00:06:43,236 --> 00:06:44,487
Everyone thought
I was a pedophile.

191
00:06:44,487 --> 00:06:47,741
‐ I know, but we really have
to figure out this budget, sir.

192
00:06:47,741 --> 00:06:49,159
Apparently,
the city's Discover card

193
00:06:49,159 --> 00:06:50,410
has hit its limit,

194
00:06:50,410 --> 00:06:52,412
and some bitch is calling,
like, every day.

195
00:06:52,412 --> 00:06:53,788
‐ Uh...

196
00:06:53,788 --> 00:06:55,290
‐ Don't listen to her,
Mr. Mayor.

197
00:06:55,290 --> 00:06:56,625
Finstas ruin lives.

198
00:06:56,625 --> 00:06:57,917
My sister's cousin
had a Finsta,

199
00:06:57,917 --> 00:06:59,586
and pictures of her
in her bra

200
00:06:59,586 --> 00:07:01,588
got turned into a devastating
meme about sadness.

201
00:07:01,588 --> 00:07:03,757
‐ How's your sister's cousin
not also your cousin?

202
00:07:03,757 --> 00:07:04,591
‐ Sir, you're missing
the point.

203
00:07:04,591 --> 00:07:06,217
You need to know
what Orly's posting

204
00:07:06,217 --> 00:07:08,261
before she embarrasses
the city.

205
00:07:08,261 --> 00:07:09,262
[sly music]

206
00:07:09,262 --> 00:07:11,056
‐ So true.

207
00:07:11,056 --> 00:07:12,265
For the city.

208
00:07:12,265 --> 00:07:14,434
♪ ♪

209
00:07:14,434 --> 00:07:15,935
‐ If you want me to hack
your daughter's Finsta,

210
00:07:15,935 --> 00:07:19,773
say nothing and just be,
like, so tall and leave.

211
00:07:19,773 --> 00:07:25,695
♪ ♪

212
00:07:30,283 --> 00:07:30,950
‐ If you could have
a dinner party

213
00:07:31,576 --> 00:07:32,661
with anyone, living or dead‐‐

214
00:07:32,661 --> 00:07:35,163
‐ Eleanor Roosevelt,
her girlfriend, Lorena Hickok,

215
00:07:35,163 --> 00:07:37,666
and Wayne Brady,
'cause he just cracks me up.

216
00:07:37,666 --> 00:07:39,626
‐ [chuckles]
What is your fondest memory?

217
00:07:39,626 --> 00:07:43,254
‐ Seeing a bachelorette party
fall off a haunted hayride.

218
00:07:43,254 --> 00:07:44,422
‐ What's your greatest fear?

219
00:07:44,422 --> 00:07:46,800
‐ Holes,
clusters of holes.

220
00:07:46,800 --> 00:07:48,259
‐ What?
‐ It's called trypophobia.

221
00:07:48,259 --> 00:07:50,804
Basically, when I see
a cut‐open pomegranate

222
00:07:50,804 --> 00:07:52,972
or an empty "Connect 4" grid,

223
00:07:52,972 --> 00:07:55,141
to my mind, it looks
like diseased flesh.

224
00:07:55,141 --> 00:08:00,605
I almost fainted today when
Neil showed that...honeycomb.

225
00:08:00,605 --> 00:08:02,232
[harp glissando]
‐ Ooh, a bee apartment.

226
00:08:02,232 --> 00:08:04,150
[tense music]

227
00:08:04,150 --> 00:08:06,236
‐ I was feeling so good
till then.

228
00:08:06,236 --> 00:08:08,488
You think Bremer did that
to mess with me?

229
00:08:08,488 --> 00:08:11,616
He could have access
to my psychological evaluation.

230
00:08:11,616 --> 00:08:14,327
‐ What? No.
Are you crazy?

231
00:08:14,327 --> 00:08:15,829
Showed you a bunch of holes?

232
00:08:15,829 --> 00:08:17,872
Just a bunch
of close‐together holes?

233
00:08:17,872 --> 00:08:20,208
‐ Talk about something else.
‐ Okay, um...

234
00:08:20,208 --> 00:08:23,294
would you like to make
eye contact for four minutes?

235
00:08:23,294 --> 00:08:24,254
‐ Sure.

236
00:08:30,844 --> 00:08:32,679
‐ You're starting to drift
into the oncoming lane.

237
00:08:32,679 --> 00:08:34,514
‐ Yup.
[horn blares]

238
00:08:34,514 --> 00:08:37,475
[sly music]

239
00:08:37,475 --> 00:08:38,768
♪ ♪

240
00:08:38,768 --> 00:08:40,353
‐ I told Mikaela
I had to step out

241
00:08:40,353 --> 00:08:41,688
to take an important call.

242
00:08:41,688 --> 00:08:44,524
What?
My handyman is dead?

243
00:08:44,524 --> 00:08:46,109
How's it going?

244
00:08:46,109 --> 00:08:48,111
‐ Okay, so I cross‐referenced
Orly's public profile

245
00:08:48,111 --> 00:08:49,696
with her friends
and who they follow,

246
00:08:49,696 --> 00:08:50,989
then narrowed it down
to just the privates:

247
00:08:50,989 --> 00:08:53,825
@MzAdamsIzGross,
@SpudHag‐‐

248
00:08:53,825 --> 00:08:56,703
‐ @PearlSquirrel05.
That's Orly.

249
00:08:56,703 --> 00:08:58,204
‐ Are you sure?
‐ Yes.

250
00:08:58,204 --> 00:09:01,332
Her middle name is Pearl,
she was born in 2005,

251
00:09:01,332 --> 00:09:03,710
and her Harry Potter animal
is a squirrel.

252
00:09:03,710 --> 00:09:06,379
Man, I feel like an NCIS.
‐ Great.

253
00:09:06,379 --> 00:09:08,173
Okay, so our next step
is to make our own fake account

254
00:09:08,173 --> 00:09:09,716
so that we can get in
with these girls.

255
00:09:09,716 --> 00:09:11,551
What should our name be?
‐ Nancy.

256
00:09:11,551 --> 00:09:13,053
‐ No one under 60
is named Nancy.

257
00:09:13,053 --> 00:09:15,388
‐ Aisha.
‐ Stay in your lane, sir.

258
00:09:15,388 --> 00:09:17,015
‐ Caswell.
Renness.

259
00:09:17,015 --> 00:09:19,726
I'm not a writer.
Uh, Kyla. No, Kylus.

260
00:09:19,726 --> 00:09:22,228
‐ Great.
So Emma.

261
00:09:22,228 --> 00:09:25,231
Let's do this.

262
00:09:25,231 --> 00:09:30,528
♪ ♪

263
00:09:30,528 --> 00:09:32,572
[camera shutter clicks]

264
00:09:32,572 --> 00:09:37,577
♪ ♪

265
00:09:37,577 --> 00:09:40,288
Oh, I am taking a picture
of you.

266
00:09:40,288 --> 00:09:46,753
♪ ♪

267
00:09:46,753 --> 00:09:47,754
[camera shutter clicks]

268
00:09:47,754 --> 00:09:49,923
♪ ♪

269
00:09:49,923 --> 00:09:52,759
‐ My God, it looks like legs.

270
00:09:52,759 --> 00:09:54,260
I don't know
what's real anymore.

271
00:09:54,260 --> 00:09:56,513
Is "Sports Illustrated"
Swimsuit Edition

272
00:09:56,513 --> 00:09:58,556
just toilet hot dogs?

273
00:09:58,556 --> 00:10:02,560
‐ So now Emma DMs
@PearlSquirrel05,

274
00:10:02,560 --> 00:10:04,104
and we wait.

275
00:10:04,104 --> 00:10:06,773
‐ My world is upside down,

276
00:10:06,773 --> 00:10:10,777
and honestly, it's thrilling.

277
00:10:10,777 --> 00:10:12,779
‐ And here's your key, ma'am.

278
00:10:14,114 --> 00:10:16,950
‐ Jayden, thank you for
your conversation in the car.

279
00:10:16,950 --> 00:10:19,452
You really distracted me
from my nerves about tomorrow.

280
00:10:19,452 --> 00:10:21,287
‐ You are super welky.

281
00:10:21,287 --> 00:10:23,623
It was a pleasure
breaking ice with you.

282
00:10:23,623 --> 00:10:25,667
‐ Bye.

283
00:10:25,667 --> 00:10:26,793
‐ Hey.

284
00:10:26,793 --> 00:10:27,752
You wanna meet up
in a little bit,

285
00:10:27,752 --> 00:10:29,045
maybe get some dinner

286
00:10:29,045 --> 00:10:30,797
and take
the "Lady Bird" walking tour?

287
00:10:30,797 --> 00:10:32,298
‐ As long as it's not as scary
as the movie.

288
00:10:34,801 --> 00:10:36,261
Wow. [chuckles]

289
00:10:36,261 --> 00:10:38,138
You're not gonna believe it,
but just this morning,

290
00:10:38,138 --> 00:10:39,973
that lady and I
barely knew each other.

291
00:10:39,973 --> 00:10:41,307
But now I know that
her biggest regret in life

292
00:10:41,307 --> 00:10:42,809
is that she
accidentally clapped

293
00:10:42,809 --> 00:10:44,477
when the "Challenger" exploded.

294
00:10:44,477 --> 00:10:46,563
And it's all because of
these icebreakers I downloaded.

295
00:10:46,563 --> 00:10:47,981
‐ Where'd you get 'em?

296
00:10:47,981 --> 00:10:49,816
I'm always looking for new ways
to seem normal.

297
00:10:49,816 --> 00:10:51,151
‐ Mm, I just searched
"icebreakers,"

298
00:10:51,151 --> 00:10:53,319
and I found 78Questions.com.

299
00:10:53,319 --> 00:10:55,280
"The 78 questions
you ask someone

300
00:10:55,280 --> 00:10:56,823
when you want to fall in love."

301
00:10:56,823 --> 00:10:58,658
[laughs]
Oh, no.

302
00:10:58,658 --> 00:11:00,451
Oh, boy.

303
00:11:00,451 --> 00:11:01,995
[knock at door]

304
00:11:01,995 --> 00:11:04,497
‐ Hey, hey!
You ready to hit the Sac'?

305
00:11:04,497 --> 00:11:06,374
‐ Okay.
We need to talk.

306
00:11:06,374 --> 00:11:09,502
I know that it got heavy
in the car,

307
00:11:09,502 --> 00:11:12,005
but, ma'am,
don't fall in love with me.

308
00:11:12,005 --> 00:11:13,756
‐ What?
‐ I just found out

309
00:11:13,756 --> 00:11:14,674
that those questions
were designed

310
00:11:14,674 --> 00:11:16,092
to make people fall in love,

311
00:11:16,092 --> 00:11:18,094
and when you shared with me
that your ideal man

312
00:11:18,094 --> 00:11:21,014
was '80s James Brolin,
frankly, I got worried.

313
00:11:21,014 --> 00:11:22,473
‐ We are not in love,
Mr. Kwapis.

314
00:11:22,473 --> 00:11:23,391
And you, sir,

315
00:11:23,391 --> 00:11:25,268
are no "Amityville Horror"
James Brolin.

316
00:11:25,268 --> 00:11:27,854
‐ Technically, that's '79,
but whatever.

317
00:11:27,854 --> 00:11:29,189
Cool.

318
00:11:29,189 --> 00:11:30,940
It's just that I think
that we are better off

319
00:11:30,940 --> 00:11:32,692
as really good friends.

320
00:11:32,692 --> 00:11:33,943
‐ We are not even friends.

321
00:11:33,943 --> 00:11:35,278
Friends have a shorthand.

322
00:11:35,278 --> 00:11:37,155
Friends make sacrifices
for each other

323
00:11:37,155 --> 00:11:38,656
and have a deep understanding.

324
00:11:38,656 --> 00:11:40,033
I don't think
we're understanding each other

325
00:11:40,033 --> 00:11:41,534
at all in this moment, do you?

326
00:11:41,534 --> 00:11:42,785
‐ I mean, sure, I could eat.

327
00:11:48,166 --> 00:11:48,208
.

328
00:11:49,417 --> 00:11:49,667
‐ Sir, we're in.

329
00:11:50,501 --> 00:11:52,295
Orly accepted Emma's request.

330
00:11:52,295 --> 00:11:54,047
‐ What are you finding?
Vapes?

331
00:11:54,047 --> 00:11:55,381
Tattoos?

332
00:11:55,381 --> 00:11:57,050
‐ It's actually
mostly just selfies.

333
00:11:57,050 --> 00:11:58,885
What I'm looking for is
red‐flag slang in the captions.

334
00:11:58,885 --> 00:12:00,678
So "smash" means hooking up.

335
00:12:00,678 --> 00:12:02,013
"Dexing" is abusing
cough syrup.

336
00:12:02,013 --> 00:12:03,181
"GOW" is "gay on the weekends."

337
00:12:03,181 --> 00:12:05,141
Seven 8s in a row
is a human centipede.

338
00:12:05,141 --> 00:12:07,060
‐ No, what‐‐what's boron?
Is that a drug?

339
00:12:07,060 --> 00:12:10,188
She says she's finally done
with this boron nightmare.

340
00:12:10,188 --> 00:12:11,731
‐ I think she's just bragging
about finishing

341
00:12:11,731 --> 00:12:13,024
her chemistry project early.

342
00:12:13,024 --> 00:12:15,401
‐ What's "TFW"?
‐ "That feeling when."

343
00:12:15,401 --> 00:12:18,571
‐ That feeling when your dad
drags you to Huntington Gardens

344
00:12:18,571 --> 00:12:19,822
for the millionth time.

345
00:12:19,822 --> 00:12:22,242
But why is it a picture of a
sloth giving the middle finger?

346
00:12:22,242 --> 00:12:24,202
She loves it
when I take her there.

347
00:12:24,202 --> 00:12:26,746
‐ Mr. Mayor, I'm sorry
about your handyman, but‐‐

348
00:12:26,746 --> 00:12:28,248
Wait.

349
00:12:28,248 --> 00:12:30,124
Why did you slam your laptop
shut when I came in?

350
00:12:30,124 --> 00:12:31,084
‐ What?
We're studying.

351
00:12:31,084 --> 00:12:33,169
‐ Are you on Instagram?

352
00:12:33,169 --> 00:12:35,171
‐ Tommy felt it was important
to access

353
00:12:35,171 --> 00:12:37,757
Orly's private account
for security reasons.

354
00:12:37,757 --> 00:12:41,261
‐ So we are Emma,
a junior at Marlborough.

355
00:12:41,261 --> 00:12:43,888
We do orchestra.
We're confident but not cocky.

356
00:12:43,888 --> 00:12:46,432
‐ You helped the mayor
create a fake account

357
00:12:46,432 --> 00:12:48,434
impersonating a teenage girl?

358
00:12:48,434 --> 00:12:50,353
Where did you get
this profile picture?

359
00:12:50,353 --> 00:12:52,939
‐ We Googled "cute high school
field hockey blonde."

360
00:12:52,939 --> 00:12:55,024
‐ From government servers?

361
00:12:55,024 --> 00:12:55,942
‐ Well, when you say it
like that...

362
00:12:55,942 --> 00:12:58,194
Also, do you know
what "squat" means now?

363
00:12:58,194 --> 00:12:59,612
Because tangerine seltzer
squats,

364
00:12:59,612 --> 00:13:01,906
but also somehow, HPV squats.

365
00:13:01,906 --> 00:13:03,616
‐ Look, this is all my fault.

366
00:13:03,616 --> 00:13:05,201
Orly's just acting out

367
00:13:05,201 --> 00:13:08,037
because I uprooted her life
with this mayor thing.

368
00:13:08,037 --> 00:13:09,956
I'm working crazy hours.

369
00:13:09,956 --> 00:13:12,125
I forced her to move
into an old house

370
00:13:12,125 --> 00:13:14,961
that's outside
SUGARFISH's delivery zone.

371
00:13:14,961 --> 00:13:19,757
I just need to reconnect...
on her level.

372
00:13:21,217 --> 00:13:24,971
And Emma showed me
how to do that.

373
00:13:24,971 --> 00:13:28,641
I am going to go home and have
dinner with her tonight.

374
00:13:28,641 --> 00:13:30,643
‐ Uh‐‐

375
00:13:30,643 --> 00:13:32,478
‐ I'll be back later.
‐ [sighs]

376
00:13:32,478 --> 00:13:33,980
Great work today, Tommy.

377
00:13:33,980 --> 00:13:36,232
How's that decision memo
on SROs coming?

378
00:13:36,232 --> 00:13:37,150
‐ [sighs]

379
00:13:37,150 --> 00:13:38,943
I don't wanna go back
to being Tommy.

380
00:13:38,943 --> 00:13:40,987
Emma gets to go
to a Glossier pop‐up tonight

381
00:13:40,987 --> 00:13:42,780
even though
there's school tomorrow.

382
00:13:42,780 --> 00:13:44,782
‐ [sighs]
[door slams]

383
00:13:44,782 --> 00:13:46,284
[light jazz music]

384
00:13:46,284 --> 00:13:49,162
‐ So what's Gucci, fam?
[chuckles]

385
00:13:49,162 --> 00:13:52,665
Any VSCO girls
stress you about cheddar?

386
00:13:52,665 --> 00:13:55,585
‐ What?
No.

387
00:13:55,585 --> 00:13:56,669
‐ Perf.

388
00:13:56,669 --> 00:13:58,671
‐ Dad, don't say "perf."

389
00:13:58,671 --> 00:14:00,840
‐ Mmm.
TFW.

390
00:14:00,840 --> 00:14:03,509
That feeling
when these tacos squat.

391
00:14:03,509 --> 00:14:04,635
You up?

392
00:14:04,635 --> 00:14:06,137
‐ Dad, are you okay?

393
00:14:06,137 --> 00:14:07,638
What's your middle name?

394
00:14:07,638 --> 00:14:09,015
What year do you think this is?

395
00:14:09,015 --> 00:14:10,641
‐ I'm mad fine.

396
00:14:10,641 --> 00:14:13,186
‐ That just means
you're handsome.

397
00:14:13,186 --> 00:14:15,021
‐ Well, I am handsome.

398
00:14:15,021 --> 00:14:17,190
♪ ♪

399
00:14:17,190 --> 00:14:19,525
Who you texting?
‐ No one.

400
00:14:19,525 --> 00:14:23,821
♪ ♪

401
00:14:23,821 --> 00:14:26,324
‐ Look, salt bae,

402
00:14:26,324 --> 00:14:28,951
I know I haven't been around
as much as you're used to.

403
00:14:28,951 --> 00:14:30,870
#MayorLife.

404
00:14:30,870 --> 00:14:32,246
♪ ♪

405
00:14:32,246 --> 00:14:34,665
But you can always
tell me anything.

406
00:14:34,665 --> 00:14:36,125
‐ I know.

407
00:14:36,125 --> 00:14:38,461
‐ I just don't want us
to lose our connection.

408
00:14:38,461 --> 00:14:41,339
We're not basic.
We don't have secrets IRL.

409
00:14:41,339 --> 00:14:43,549
You know,
name a more iconic duo.

410
00:14:43,549 --> 00:14:44,425
I'll wait.

411
00:14:44,425 --> 00:14:46,344
‐ Okay, Dad,
stop talking like that.

412
00:14:46,344 --> 00:14:47,720
‐ Okay.

413
00:14:47,720 --> 00:14:51,182
♪ ♪

414
00:14:51,182 --> 00:14:53,226
Wanna watch TV
together later?

415
00:14:53,226 --> 00:14:54,852
"Cake Boss" and chill at 10:00?

416
00:14:54,852 --> 00:14:56,729
‐ "And chill" means sex.

417
00:14:56,729 --> 00:14:59,232
both: Ew.
‐ And I can't tonight.

418
00:14:59,232 --> 00:15:01,818
Ceviche's coming over to finish
our chemistry project.

419
00:15:01,818 --> 00:15:04,904
We're making a papier‐mâché
of the element boron,

420
00:15:04,904 --> 00:15:06,906
so it's gonna take forever.

421
00:15:06,906 --> 00:15:08,741
‐ Okay.

422
00:15:08,741 --> 00:15:10,660
She lied to me.

423
00:15:10,660 --> 00:15:13,204
My baby lied to me.

424
00:15:13,204 --> 00:15:16,541
We know she already finished
that science project.

425
00:15:16,541 --> 00:15:17,375
Where's Mikaela?

426
00:15:17,375 --> 00:15:20,545
Has anyone seen
my chief of staff?

427
00:15:20,545 --> 00:15:22,380
‐ She went home
because of violent cramps.

428
00:15:22,380 --> 00:15:24,257
She said you would not ask
a follow‐up.

429
00:15:24,257 --> 00:15:27,051
‐ She is correct.
Refresh, refresh.

430
00:15:27,051 --> 00:15:28,427
‐ No new posts since yesterday.

431
00:15:28,427 --> 00:15:30,263
‐ I don't get it.
We were connecting.

432
00:15:30,263 --> 00:15:33,266
I was being cool AF‐‐
cool as Fonzie‐‐

433
00:15:33,266 --> 00:15:35,101
and she lied to my face.
[cell phone buzzes]

434
00:15:35,101 --> 00:15:36,936
‐ Orly just DM'd Emma.

435
00:15:36,936 --> 00:15:38,604
‐ "Mayor working late.

436
00:15:38,604 --> 00:15:40,439
Gorge Borge at Getty House."

437
00:15:40,439 --> 00:15:41,941
What the hell's
a Gorge Borge?

438
00:15:41,941 --> 00:15:43,109
‐ According
to Urban Dictionary,

439
00:15:43,109 --> 00:15:44,610
Gorge Borge, noun,

440
00:15:44,610 --> 00:15:48,614
originated in Amsterdam
during the 2017 blackout.

441
00:15:48,614 --> 00:15:50,449
‐ Dan, car!

442
00:15:50,449 --> 00:15:51,909
‐ It gets grosser!

443
00:15:55,121 --> 00:15:55,163
.

444
00:15:56,372 --> 00:15:56,622
‐ Nobody move!

445
00:15:57,373 --> 00:15:58,749
I read about
what's happening here.

446
00:15:58,749 --> 00:16:00,042
I'm coming in.

447
00:16:00,042 --> 00:16:00,835
I'm gonna need everyone
to put your pants on

448
00:16:00,835 --> 00:16:02,712
and take the bread
out of the water

449
00:16:02,712 --> 00:16:04,297
and stop the Gorge Borge.

450
00:16:04,297 --> 00:16:06,382
‐ Hey, guys.
Emma's here.

451
00:16:06,382 --> 00:16:09,302
Oh, my God.
You look so cute.

452
00:16:09,302 --> 00:16:10,636
‐ Mikaela?

453
00:16:10,636 --> 00:16:13,389
Oh, please tell me
you're not the Gorgemeister.

454
00:16:13,389 --> 00:16:16,058
‐ Sir, a Gorge Borge
is very not a thing.

455
00:16:16,058 --> 00:16:17,894
‐ Ugh, Urban Dictionary
is crowdsourced, sir.

456
00:16:17,894 --> 00:16:19,061
I should have cross‐checked it

457
00:16:19,061 --> 00:16:20,313
with the comment section
on YouTube.

458
00:16:20,313 --> 00:16:22,607
‐ Well, what's happening
here, then? Wh‐‐

459
00:16:22,607 --> 00:16:24,483
‐ Before you get mad,
this was not my idea.

460
00:16:24,483 --> 00:16:26,444
Orly DM'd me earlier
because she was concerned

461
00:16:26,444 --> 00:16:29,572
you were having a stroke,
so I told her the truth

462
00:16:29,572 --> 00:16:31,115
that Emma is hot dogs.

463
00:16:31,115 --> 00:16:32,992
‐ Dad, you need to stop
spying on me.

464
00:16:32,992 --> 00:16:34,410
‐ You need to stop lying to me.

465
00:16:34,410 --> 00:16:36,412
‐ I lied about
the science project

466
00:16:36,412 --> 00:16:40,041
because Ceviche and I wanted
to see "Stab Massacre 2."

467
00:16:40,041 --> 00:16:41,209
‐ I think I made it
pretty clear

468
00:16:41,209 --> 00:16:42,501
I didn't want you doing that.

469
00:16:42,501 --> 00:16:43,586
And by the way,

470
00:16:43,586 --> 00:16:46,672
if you don't like making
the tote bags, just tell me.

471
00:16:46,672 --> 00:16:49,091
‐ I don't like
making the tote bags.

472
00:16:49,091 --> 00:16:50,509
‐ Fine.
I'll take Emma.

473
00:16:50,509 --> 00:16:52,637
‐ [scoffs]
I can't wait to grow up

474
00:16:52,637 --> 00:16:55,640
and move, like,
24,000 miles away from you.

475
00:16:55,640 --> 00:16:56,515
‐ Oh, you mean all the way

476
00:16:56,515 --> 00:16:59,101
around the Earth
and then right back here?

477
00:16:59,101 --> 00:17:00,853
It'll be nice to have you
so close.

478
00:17:00,853 --> 00:17:02,021
[door slams]

479
00:17:08,444 --> 00:17:11,030
‐ Did Mayor Bremer
send you here to sabotage me?

480
00:17:11,030 --> 00:17:12,782
Does he secretly hate
the oil plan?

481
00:17:12,782 --> 00:17:14,200
‐ What?
No.

482
00:17:14,200 --> 00:17:15,785
How could he know
we were gonna fall in love?

483
00:17:15,785 --> 00:17:17,119
‐ Oh, good Lord.

484
00:17:19,413 --> 00:17:20,998
It's 10:00 in the morning,
Kwapis.

485
00:17:20,998 --> 00:17:22,583
‐ Breakups are emotional, okay?

486
00:17:22,583 --> 00:17:24,126
You do not get to tell me
what to do.

487
00:17:24,126 --> 00:17:26,545
We're not together!

488
00:17:26,545 --> 00:17:29,799
[light music]

489
00:17:29,799 --> 00:17:32,677
‐ Sorry for my tone last night.

490
00:17:32,677 --> 00:17:34,220
You're getting older.

491
00:17:34,220 --> 00:17:36,389
If you wanna go to the movie,
go to the movie.

492
00:17:36,389 --> 00:17:38,307
But pay with your own money.

493
00:17:38,307 --> 00:17:40,476
‐ Fine.
I will.

494
00:17:40,476 --> 00:17:43,354
‐ Although paying with
your money is still my money

495
00:17:43,354 --> 00:17:44,814
'cause you don't have a job.

496
00:17:44,814 --> 00:17:46,232
‐ I can make my own money.

497
00:17:46,232 --> 00:17:48,234
Ceviche knows a guy
who likes to buy

498
00:17:48,234 --> 00:17:51,320
used girls' flip‐flops
on the dark web.

499
00:17:52,572 --> 00:17:54,407
‐ Cool.

500
00:17:54,407 --> 00:17:56,742
Thanks for telling me that.

501
00:17:56,742 --> 00:17:58,494
‐ The governor has
several events this morning,

502
00:17:58,494 --> 00:18:00,037
so he's running
a little behind.

503
00:18:00,037 --> 00:18:01,747
‐ Okay.
I understand.

504
00:18:01,747 --> 00:18:03,416
We often have the‐‐

505
00:18:04,458 --> 00:18:06,377
[dramatic music]
‐ Oh, sorry.

506
00:18:06,377 --> 00:18:08,421
We have a photo op
with some kids later.

507
00:18:08,421 --> 00:18:10,047
They made the state's
largest blueberry pancake

508
00:18:10,047 --> 00:18:12,049
to celebrate
California agriculture.

509
00:18:12,049 --> 00:18:13,342
They've got over
a thousand blueberries

510
00:18:13,342 --> 00:18:14,719
clustered in there.

511
00:18:14,719 --> 00:18:15,720
‐ [meekly] Holes.

512
00:18:15,720 --> 00:18:17,513
♪ ♪

513
00:18:17,513 --> 00:18:18,723
So many holes.

514
00:18:18,723 --> 00:18:20,266
‐ Okay, great.
The governor's walking.

515
00:18:20,266 --> 00:18:22,101
I'll have him here
in less than a minute.

516
00:18:22,101 --> 00:18:24,103
‐ Please.

517
00:18:24,103 --> 00:18:26,272
The holes.

518
00:18:26,272 --> 00:18:27,440
♪ ♪

519
00:18:27,440 --> 00:18:29,108
‐ Banana.

520
00:18:29,108 --> 00:18:31,402
♪ ♪

521
00:18:31,402 --> 00:18:33,237
Hurry.

522
00:18:33,237 --> 00:18:34,864
He's coming.

523
00:18:34,864 --> 00:18:41,287
♪ ♪

524
00:18:41,287 --> 00:18:43,080
‐ I know what I have to do.

525
00:18:43,080 --> 00:18:45,249
♪ ♪

526
00:18:45,249 --> 00:18:48,127
[light triumphant music]

527
00:18:48,127 --> 00:18:55,301
♪ ♪

528
00:18:58,304 --> 00:18:59,972
‐ You're disgusting.

529
00:18:59,972 --> 00:19:02,141
♪ ♪

530
00:19:02,141 --> 00:19:04,644
Thank you.

531
00:19:04,644 --> 00:19:06,812
‐ And done.

532
00:19:06,812 --> 00:19:08,397
‐ Right this way, Mr. Governor.

533
00:19:08,397 --> 00:19:10,232
‐ Mr. Governor,
Arpilene Meskimen,

534
00:19:10,232 --> 00:19:11,901
deputy mayor of Los Angeles.

535
00:19:11,901 --> 00:19:14,236
Let's talk about oil.

536
00:19:14,236 --> 00:19:16,781
‐ What the hell happened
to the big pancake?

537
00:19:16,781 --> 00:19:17,990
‐ What big pancake?

538
00:19:17,990 --> 00:19:19,241
‐ The big pancake.

539
00:19:19,241 --> 00:19:21,160
‐ You sound crazy.

540
00:19:21,160 --> 00:19:22,912
♪ ♪

541
00:19:22,912 --> 00:19:24,622
[knock at door]

542
00:19:24,622 --> 00:19:26,207
We are back
from the Sac', sir.

543
00:19:26,207 --> 00:19:27,958
‐ Couldn't have gone better,
Mr. Mayor.

544
00:19:27,958 --> 00:19:29,335
The governor has asked me
to lead

545
00:19:29,335 --> 00:19:30,836
a blue‐ribbon task force

546
00:19:30,836 --> 00:19:33,339
to assess the supportability
of the initiative.

547
00:19:33,339 --> 00:19:36,092
‐ Oh, okay.
And that's good?

548
00:19:36,092 --> 00:19:37,510
‐ It was the best day
of my life, sir.

549
00:19:37,510 --> 00:19:40,179
And Mr. Kwapis proved
to be indispensable,

550
00:19:40,179 --> 00:19:42,431
a real friend to democracy.

551
00:19:42,431 --> 00:19:43,683
‐ And then we went
to a train museum.

552
00:19:43,683 --> 00:19:45,309
‐ And the thrift store
from "Lady Bird."

553
00:19:45,309 --> 00:19:47,144
‐ I bought a used bathing suit.

554
00:19:47,144 --> 00:19:48,938
‐ Are you guys close
to your parents?

555
00:19:48,938 --> 00:19:50,439
‐ Careful, Mr. Mayor.

556
00:19:50,439 --> 00:19:52,858
Questions like that
will make us all fall in love.

557
00:19:52,858 --> 00:19:55,945
[laughter]

558
00:19:55,945 --> 00:19:56,946
both: Psht!

559
00:19:56,946 --> 00:19:58,322
[laughter]

560
00:19:58,322 --> 00:20:00,032
‐ Oh, it's from earlier.

561
00:20:00,032 --> 00:20:02,785
♪ ♪

562
00:20:02,785 --> 00:20:05,204
‐ You know,
I can't light it on fire...

563
00:20:05,204 --> 00:20:07,164
‐ Oh, they'll never get that
on the truck.

564
00:20:07,164 --> 00:20:09,250
‐ Hey.

565
00:20:09,250 --> 00:20:11,127
‐ Hey.

566
00:20:11,127 --> 00:20:13,379
How was "Stab Massacre 2"?

567
00:20:13,379 --> 00:20:15,464
‐ Um, it was pretty good.

568
00:20:15,464 --> 00:20:17,216
I mean,
I kinda saw the twist coming.

569
00:20:17,216 --> 00:20:19,468
Like, obviously, the people
in the cage were gonna turn out

570
00:20:19,468 --> 00:20:21,345
to be the bodies
of the original sisters

571
00:20:21,345 --> 00:20:23,305
with new faces sewn on...

572
00:20:23,305 --> 00:20:24,974
'cause it's based
on "Little Women."

573
00:20:24,974 --> 00:20:26,475
‐ Yeah.
Obviously.

574
00:20:26,475 --> 00:20:28,978
All right, off to bed.

575
00:20:28,978 --> 00:20:31,063
School night.

576
00:20:31,063 --> 00:20:32,356
‐ Actually, do you think
I could watch

577
00:20:32,356 --> 00:20:34,233
"Cake Boss" with you?

578
00:20:34,233 --> 00:20:37,069
I kinda need a palate cleanser.

579
00:20:37,069 --> 00:20:38,612
‐ So you don't have nightmares?

580
00:20:40,906 --> 00:20:41,991
Yeah.
Come here.

581
00:20:41,991 --> 00:20:45,161
♪ ♪

582
00:20:45,161 --> 00:20:46,662
[sighs]

583
00:20:46,662 --> 00:20:48,581
‐ Thanks for letting me
go to the movie tonight.

584
00:20:48,581 --> 00:20:50,791
‐ Yeah.
[indistinct chatter over TV]

585
00:20:50,791 --> 00:20:52,334
‐ They'll never get that cake
on the truck.

586
00:20:52,334 --> 00:20:53,669
‐ Oh, come on.

587
00:20:53,669 --> 00:20:55,087
They always get it on the truck
at the end.

588
00:20:55,087 --> 00:20:57,840
‐ We're gonna actually light
the cake on fire but not here.

589
00:20:57,840 --> 00:20:59,592
‐ If you could have
a dinner party with anyone,

590
00:20:59,592 --> 00:21:01,677
living or dead‐‐
‐ Batman and Batman's parents,

591
00:21:01,677 --> 00:21:03,929
just because I feel like Batman
would really appreciate that.

592
00:21:03,929 --> 00:21:06,348
‐ If a crystal ball could tell
you the truth about anything,

593
00:21:06,348 --> 00:21:07,725
what would you wanna know?

594
00:21:07,725 --> 00:21:09,268
‐ Where do teachers go
during the summer?

595
00:21:09,268 --> 00:21:10,269
‐ What's your death row meal?

596
00:21:10,269 --> 00:21:12,438
‐ Depends what I did.
‐ Your house is on fire.

597
00:21:12,438 --> 00:21:14,440
If you could only bring
one thing out of it,

598
00:21:14,440 --> 00:21:16,525
what would it be?
‐ Trick question.

599
00:21:16,525 --> 00:21:18,819
The fire.
Problem solved.

600
00:21:19,612 --> 00:21:21,781
‐ Tell your life story
in ten words or less.

601
00:21:21,781 --> 00:21:25,451
‐ "'We hate this one,'
said the orphanage,

602
00:21:25,451 --> 00:21:28,913
so Jayden's parents"‐‐oh.

603
00:21:29,830 --> 00:21:31,832
‐ Good night, everybody.
‐ Good night.