[Mayor Brunson] It's unanimous. Bizmart is forbidden
from building a megastore in our beloved Brighton.
[applause]
[woman] What a relief!
Okay. Apparently, nothing prevents them
from building a megastore
eight inches outside our beloved Brighton.
Oh, it's fine. Our customers are loyal.
[Mrs. Davenport] Right. They won't abandon us
for some shiny new things!
[woman over P.A.] Attention Bizmart shoppers.
Fifty percent off shiny new things!
- [horns honking] - Give me the shiny new things!
Please shop Davenport's.
- Everything is 25% off! Please! - [screaming]
I'm so sorry Bizmart put Davenport's out of business.
Ugh! It's worse than that.
Without the store, my flawless future is falling apart.
I was gonna spend the next 20 years
starting a skincare line,
a charity for dogs with dandruff,
a whole global lifestyle company!
Then, I'd marry Alina Webster.
Her parents own Webster's department store in Mewline.
And she's like, really good at market analysis.
We merge our stores, and become the ultimate Midwest power couple!
Wow, you are really good at photo editing.
Thanks. Sometimes Patty pays me to edit photos
so her legs look longer-- I don't know why.
Who has short legs now, Linda?
Andrea, you can still do all that!
You're an influencer!
Until the "Fawndreas" find out
that Davenport's is closing.
Then we'll have zero followers!
Well, followers aren't everything!
Why don't you take a little social media break?
Okay, no! That did not land.
Pivoting to my next idea...
Maybe all you need is a re-brand.
You're so much more than the store.
Maybe you're right. If I can find a new brand,
I can save my influencer status, and my flawless future!
Andrea's school chum, oh, you'll buy something, won't you? Please.
[Molly] So, long story short,
Andrea's having an identity crisis.
Ah, poor young, aimless Andrea.
You know, one of the many gifts that comes with extended time on this earth
is knowin' exactly who your are. See?
- [rock playing] - I've got this rock 'n' roll personality.
Whoa! Beep, beep, beep! Let's back that up.
- Say that last part again? - Ah, I effortlessly exude a rock 'n' roll vibe?
Surely you've noticed.
Uhh... yeah? I mean, I guess?
- [phone ringing] - Oh! That's Andrea. Gotta go!
[blows raspberry]
What does Molly know about rock 'n' roll, anyway?
Pew, Pew!
There we go, Fawndreas.
An easy, 337-step, no-make-up-make-up look!
Make sure to follow, like, and subscribe.
'Cause I really need your support. Love you, bye!
Andrea! That was great! You've totally found your new brand!
Let's see if the Fawndreas are as obsessed as you are!
Weird. No Davenport's content. Wonder what's up with that.
That's just one comment. Oh, see? This one says,
"Click here to adopt a ferret today."
Comments don't mean anything, right?
[chuckles] Right. Numbers are what count.
What? I lost three Fawndreas?
[gasps] That's never happened before.
Your fanbase just needs time to adjust.
Maybe it's fawn-base?
But I need to hit 10 million followers by my Sweet 16!
It's the first of 22 milestones!
Fawn-base is cute, though, and I will be using it.
- [rumbling sound] - [both screaming]
So then I just... push it down? For a coffee?
Yup. Just plunge it, Pete.
- [buzzing nearby] - Is that a fly?
[buzzing continues]
Hello! Insert familial pleasantries,
et cetera, et cetera, blah blah blah.
Okay, now let's get onto me. Just curious,
How would you describe me?
- Hungry? - Blue.
[stammers] I mean, like,
what kind of personality do I have?
- Grumpy. - Unpleasant?
- Stubborn? - Oh. Stubborn. Yes. Stubborn.
- That's a good one. - Okay. It feels a little like
you're purposefully misunderstanding me?
I'll walk you right up to it.
Do I have a rock 'n' roll personality?
[Mom laughing]
Oh, you're serious. Scratch,
Rock 'n' roll is like...
[intense drum noises]
Yeah! Yeah!
And you're more like, "Wah, wah."
Ohh! [chuckles] Uh, Peter?
Do you happen to agree with this absolute character assassination?
Um, how would you describe a rock 'n' roll personality anyway?
Uh, yeah. You know...
[electric guitar riffs]
Like-- like this.
Ah! Then... no.
Wheel-n-peel out! [buzzing resumes]
You're trying too hard!
- Do I have a rock 'n' roll personality? - Oh, cob, no!
But that's why I married you.
Uh-hey, Fawndreas. It's your girl, Andrea,
taste-testing strange snacks we found in...
uh, in the Davenport's warehouse.
First step, dill pickle and sardine-flavored chips.
[weakly] Yay.
[giggles] Probably a pull tab or something on here.
You just need more force! [bag pops]
- How was that? - Well, uh...
You know, seemed a bit out of your comfort zone.
If it's what the Fawndreas want, that's all that matters.
Ugh, I'm losing more followers.
See? Without Davenport's, I'm nothing.
[woman] Hey, I saw that candy dish first.
Maybe, but you're gonna have a hard time catching me and my long legs!
Okay, okay, we can fix this!
I just need to rebrand the rebrand of the rebrand.
[chime]
[Scratch] My personality type is pretty obvious.
Hm? Eh?
[melody playing]
Oh!
- [rock music playing] - Eh?
Well, that sold me! [chuckles]
You definitely have a rock 'n' roll personality.
[snickers] Yes! Thank you, Geoff.
- I knew you had good taste. - [Jeff hums]
More like a soft rock personality.
[ego shatters]
A "soft rock" personality? Are you kidding me?
I'm taking this... [muffled] for emotional damages!
Okay, I scoured the Internet for the top performing videos.
Ooh. Plumbing hacks? Building tiny furniture?
Rehabilitating butterflies?
Ah, none of these ideas seem very...
- Andrea? - Well, who even is Andrea?
If I have to change my whole personality to achieve my flawless future,
then that's what I'll do!
♪ Uh... ♪
♪ Hit ♪
♪ Uh ♪
♪ She is clearly having An identity crisis ♪
♪ Rebrand, rebrand ♪
♪ Identity crisis ♪
♪ Who is my, uh... ♪
♪ Identity crisis ♪
-♪ But you'll be okay ♪ -♪ Okay ♪
♪ Think who you are And throw it far away ♪
- On it! - Hey! Maybe you wake.
Yeah. Go make a cake. Pound.
Baking is hard. Your cake's completely tarred.
♪ Well, maybe you game ♪
♪ Gaming is so awesome ♪
How many subscribers did I get?
- You lost some... - What?
♪ Identity Crisis ♪
♪ You know what to do ♪
♪ Rebrand, rebrand ♪
♪ Into a brand-new you ♪
Doing impressions of favorite cartoons.
Filling your house with a thousand balloons.
Teaching 'em lessons on how to play spoons.
Take a hashtag at the casserole.
The gymspirational, gettin' swole.
If you gonna live stream your morning stroll,
just watch out for that hole!
♪ Identity Crisis ♪
♪ Gotta get some tasty views ♪
♪ Identity crisis ♪
♪ Did you try to play the blues ♪
[beginner's notes]
♪ Identity crisis ♪
♪ Whatever you you choose ♪
♪ Rebrand, rebrand ♪
♪ Into a brand-new you ♪
[big sigh]
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah!
Ooh!
What are you doing? And why are you doing it?
Well, I thought Molly's denim jacket might help
others see my rock 'n' roll personality, but...
I think the embroidered unicorn is kinda hurtin' the cause.
[horse neighing]
Scratch. You don't need anyone's validation
to have a rock 'n' roll personality.
In fact, it's more rock 'n' roll if you don't.
So, are you saying, my opinion is the only one that matters?
And everyone else's are dumb and and should be ignored?
Sure. And Scratch?
You're slaying the fit.
[sudden, emotional laugh]
I'm gonna assume that's good?
[Mr. Davenport on bullhorn] That's it, folks.
Davenport's is closing.
For the last time.
All sales are final. [sobbing]
Sorry, Molly, but I'm not feeling this Cutie-pie rebrand at the moment.
That's fine, Andrea.
You know, most 13-year olds don't have their whole lives figured out.
I know. But I did, and now, I don't know what I'm gonna do,
or who I'm supposed to be, and my future is a hot mess.
Just like me.
Sorry, Alina. You'll have to find
another powerful businesswoman
to merge dynasties with.
[beep]
[fast beeps]
[gasps] Oh, no!
Oh, no. We were live that whole time.
Oh, no, I'm so sorry! The empathy part of my brain
overpowered the "press the stop button" part of my brain!
It doesn't matter anyway, Molly.
My brand is garbage.
Who'd wanna follow me?
These comments...
Oh, Andrea! Don't read them! It's not worth it!
[gasps] Oh, Molly, look!
"Love this honesty."
"So real and vulnerable."
"A ferret can be yours in less than three clicks!"
Okay. Well, that's bad. I'm gonna block that one.
But everyone else is being really nice!
[gasps] That's it!
Your new brand is you!
- Just being you! - This means...
my flawless future is still possible?
[squeals] Thanks, Molly!
Follow me, Fawndreas, for more completely unscripted,
totally authentic moments like this.
Molly, I think maybe you were right before--
I could use a little social media detox.
I'll take a week off and come back
bright and refreshed for my Fawndreas!
- How'd it go? - You know, pretty good. Wha--
- Is that my jacket? - I don't need your validation!
I'm rock 'n' roll, baby!
So taking my things is "rock 'n' roll" now?
Yup. And I'm taking the pie, too.
♪ The Ghost and Molly McGee ♪
[theme music plays]