- SAY YOU LOVE ME. - PREVIOUSLY ON "SISTAS"...
- I LOVE YOU. - I'M A COOL DUDE. I WORK HARD.
I'D REALLY LIKE TO TAKE YOU OUT.
I JUST GOT THE LARGEST DIVORCE SETTLEMENT
MY FIRM HAS EVER SEEN.
I NEVER HAD A WOMAN LIKE YOU BEFORE.
AND YOU NEVER WILL AGAIN.
DAMN, YOU FINE, GARY.
WE'VE BEEN WAITING TO MEET THIS MYSTERY MAN FOR 6 MONTHS!
THANK YOU FOR NOT TELLING THE GIRLS THAT GARY'S MARRIED.
FIRST, I'D LIKE TO SAY I HATE THAT WE'RE HERE TO TALK ABOUT DIVORCE.
WHERE DO WE START?
LET'S START WITH YOUR HUSBAND'S NAME.
GARY MARSHALL BORDERS.
ANDI: I'M SORRY. WHAT WAS HIS NAME?
GARY MARSHALL BORDERS.
I'M SORRY. WOULD YOU LIKE SOME WATER?
NO, THANKS. I'M FINE.
I'M USED TO THE HEAT. I'M FROM ALBUQUERQUE.
RIGHT.
OK.
WOULD YOU EXCUSE ME FOR A MOMENT?
YEAH. SURE.
I HAD TOO MUCH COFFEE.
JASMINE: MMM. GOTCHA. YEAH, NO WORRIES.
OK, THANKS.
[BREATHING HARD]
[CLICKING]
[PHONE BUZZING]
[RINGING]
KAREN: OK, I DIDN'T MAKE IT.
- KAREN. - OK, YEAH,
WELL, I KNOW YOU DIDN'T EITHER, OK?
- WHY WAS YOU SO WEAK? - KAREN...
KAREN: DON'T CALL ME JUDGING ME, OK?
AT LEAST ZAK IS NOT MARRIED.
ANDI: KAREN! SHE'S HERE.
WHO?
HIS WIFE.
WHERE?
ANDI: SHE'S IN MY OFFICE.
WAIT. WHAT THE HELL YOU TALKIN' ABOUT?
THE WOMAN I WON ALL THAT MONEY FOR?
SHE RECOMMENDED ME TO HER.
OH, THAT'S A GOOD THING.
NO, THE HELL IT'S NOT.
WELL, IT MEANS HE'S TELLING THE TRUTH.
HE'S GETTING A DIVORCE.
YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND.
SHE WANTS ME TO REPRESENT HER.
KAREN: OH, HELL, NO! YOU CAN'T DO THAT.
I KNOW THAT.
KAREN: WELL, JUST GIVE HER TO SOMEONE ELSE.
GIVE HER TO ANOTHER LAWYER.
ANDI: SHE CANNOT BE REPRESENTED HERE AT ALL.
THAT IS A CLEAR CONFLICT.
WELL, THEN, YOU GOTTA TELL YOUR BOSS.
WHAT, THAT I AM SLEEPING WITH A MARRIED MAN?
ANDI, WHAT ELSE YOU GONNA DO?
YOU JUST GOT THE JOB.
I KNOW, AND I HAVE NEVER MADE THIS MUCH MONEY.
KAREN: WHAT YOU GONNA DO, GIRL?
I DON'T KNOW.
LOOK, YOU BETTER FIGURE IT OUT.
ANDI: I'M GONNA CALL YOU BACK.
OK. BYE.
WOMAN: ♪ DON'T MY GIRLS HOLD ME DOWN ♪
WOMAN: ♪ DON'T MY GIRLS ♪ LET THEM BOYS MESS AROUND ♪
♪ MY LOVE LIFE IS A HEADACHE ♪
♪ WE'RE GOING OUT TONIGHT ♪
♪ 'CAUSE I'M INTO THE LOVE ♪
SIR, I NEED TO TALK TO YOU.
WHAT ARE YOU DOING? SHE'S WAITING.
YES, I KNOW, BUT I JUST NEED TO TELL YOU SOMETHING BEFORE I GO BACK IN THERE.
ANDI, TALK TO HER FIRST.
I THINK THAT SHE NEEDS ANOTHER LAWYER, SIR.
WHY?
BECAUSE I AM NOT SUITABLE TO HANDLE THIS CASE.
DON: I HATE TO BE BLUNT, BUT HELEN SAID SHE WANTED A BLACK WOMAN.
SHE REFERRED YOU TO HER. WHAT'S THE PROBLEM?
I THINK THAT THERE MAY BE A CONFLICT OF INTEREST.
DON: LISTEN, THIS IS JUST COLD FEET, OK?
YOU GOT THIS. YOU'RE GONNA BE GREAT AT IT.
YOU MADE $6 MILLION FOR THIS FIRM IN JUST 2 CASES
AND 800,000 FOR YOURSELF.
THIS IS ANOTHER BIG ONE.
GO ON. GO GET IT.
WE'RE COUNTING ON YOU. MAKE THIS WORK.
YES, SIR.
SO SORRY.
[JASMINE CRYING] NO. I'M SORRY.
I JUST...
I NEVER THOUGHT IT WOULD COME TO THIS.
I JUST...I LOVE HIM SO MUCH.
[SNIFFS] BUT I HAVE TO HAVE STANDARDS, YOU KNOW?
I MEAN, YOU HAVE TO HOLD THEM TO THE FIRE AT SOME POINT,
OTHERWISE THEY'LL RUN ALL OVER YOU.
[SNIFFS]
I...
HAVE A REALLY GREAT ASSOCIATE
WHO HAS BEEN WITH US FOR MANY YEARS,
AND HE-- - NO.
HE HAS HANDLED OVER 400 DIVORCES.
- NO. - HE WOULD BE PERFECT.
NO, NO, NO. I WANT YOU.
JASMINE: HELEN SAID THAT YOU ARE THE BEST
AND THAT YOU ARE ALMOST LIKE A THERAPIST TO HER.
AND NOW SHE'S SO HAPPY.
I JUST WANT TO GET OUT OF THIS THING HAPPY.
OK? SO I WANT YOU, YOU AND ONLY YOU.
THAT MAN TOOK MY ENTIRE LIFE.
HE OWES ME!
...BASTARD.
[SNIFFS]
[CLEARS THROAT]
MAY I ASK WHY YOU WANT A DIVORCE?
HOW MUCH TIME YOU GOT? I GOT LOTS OF REASONS.
SUCH AS?
HE'S A LIAR...
A CHEATER...
- CHEATER? - AN ABUSER...
AN ABUSER?
JASMINE: YES. AND I KNOW HE'S CHEATING WITH SOMEONE,
AND I'M SICK OF IT!
HAS HE DONE THIS BEFORE?
YES.
DO YOU HAVE PROOF OF HIS AFFAIRS?
HE'S CAREFUL,
SO CAREFUL.
AND WHOEVER THIS WOMAN IS, SHE'S DIFFERENT.
HE SHOWERS MORE.
HE WEARS DIFFERENT CLOTHES.
I HEAR HIM WHISPERING.
AND I WANT TO KNOW WHO THAT BITCH IS!
I'M SORRY.
NO. DON'T BE.
IT'S NOT YOUR FAULT.
LOOK, I KNOW HE'S GONNA LEAVE ME,
BUT I WANT TO BEAT HIM TO IT.
SO I HIRED A PRIVATE DETECTIVE.
[JASMINE SNIFFS]
DO THEY HAVE ANYTHING?
AS I SAID, HE'S CAREFUL.
BUT I KNOW HE'S GONNA FIND SOMETHING SOON.
I THINK THAT SHE'S AT HIS GYM.
W-WHY DO YOU THINK THAT?
THE PRIVATE DETECTIVE FOLLOWS HIM TO THE GYM AT 5 A.M.
HE PARKS AT THE BUILDING ACROSS THE STREET,
BUT DOESN'T APPEAR TO THE GYM UNTIL AN HOUR LATER.
YOU CAN HELP ME...
CAN'T YOU?
TELL ME MORE, AND I WILL SEE WHAT I CAN DO.
OK.
ON SATURDAYS, WE'RE SUPPOSED TO MEET AT THE MALL.
ZAC: I'M SORRY.
[BRACELET DROPS ON TABLE]
ABOUT LAST NIGHT?
ABOUT EVERYTHING.
I HEAR YOU.
BUT YOU DON'T ACCEPT MY APOLOGY?
ZAC, LOOK...
ZAC: LISTEN, I JUST...
I JUST WANT THINGS TO GO BACK TO THE WAY THEY WERE.
THEN YOU SHOULDN'T HAVE DONE WHAT YOU DID!
I KNOW! I KNOW! BUT WHAT'S DONE IS DONE.
CAN WE JUST MOVE FORWARD?
THAT AIN'T HOW IT WORKS, ZAC.
'CAUSE YOU WANT TO BE MAD.
NO. 'CAUSE I'M HURT.
YOU KNOW WHAT...
YOU DON'T GET THIS.
AND THIS SELFISH-ASS CONVERSATION
THAT YOU ARE HAVING WITH ME RIGHT NOW
JUST CONTINUES TO INFORM ME THAT YOU DON'T GET THIS.
- I GET IT. - NO, YOU DON'T.
YOU THINK JUST 'CAUSE I ... YOU LAST NIGHT IT'S ALL GOOD?
WE COOL?
IF I CAN RECALL, I DID ALL THE ...
WE GOT JOKES RIGHT NOW?
NO, I DON'T--I'M JUST TRYING TO MAKE YOU LAUGH.
BY TELLING A JOKE ABOUT ...?
YOU KNOW WHAT THAT JUST MADE ME THINK ABOUT?
YOU ... HER.
YOU KNOW WHAT I WAS THINKIN' ABOUT LAST NIGHT WHEN YOU WAS ON YOUR KNEES?
HOW YOU DID THAT TO HER.
WHY WOULD YOU BE THINKING ABOUT HER?
THIS BETWEEN YOU AND ME.
YOU KNOW WHAT, CAN YOU JUST GET OUT?
'CAUSE I REGRET LAST NIGHT FOR SURE.
OK, ALL RIGHT, YOU WAS WEAK. I WAS WEAK.
BUT YOU STILL MAD, AND I'M STILL IN THE DOGHOUSE.
ALL I'M SAYING IS WE GOTTA MOVE FORWARD.
THAT'S ALL, BABY.
NO. THAT AIN'T ALL.
THEN WHAT?
YOU FORGOT ONE THING.
WHAT?
YOU STILL WANT ME TO LEAVE?
DAMN RIGHT.
YOU KNOW WHAT...
I'M NOT EVEN TRYING TO UPSET YOU RIGHT NOW.
YOU GOT A LONG DAY AHEAD OF YOU.
I WON'T BE HERE WHEN YOU GET BACK.
OK.
THAT'S FOR THE BEST.
OK.
[WATER RUNNING]
SABRINA: WHAT?
AND THEN HE SAID HE WOULDN'T BE THERE WHEN I GOT HOME.
SABRINA: WELL, THAT'S WHAT YOU WANTED.
NO, IT AIN'T!
YOU ASKED HIM TO LEAVE.
KAREN: WELL, WHY DIDN'T HE WAKE UP AND JUST AGREE?
- KAREN-- - NO.
YOU KNOW WHAT, HE CAME INTO MY BEDROOM LAST NIGHT, OK?
I KNOW HE HEARD MY VIBRATOR. HE KNEW I WAS HORNY.
HE KNEW THAT HE'D GOT TO ME.
OK, WILL YOU CALM DOWN?
- HE PLAYED ME. - HE DID NOT PLAY YOU.
YOU ASKED HIM TO LEAVE.
WELL, HE SHOULD HAVE STAYED.
SABRINA: DIDN'T WE HAVE A CONVERSATION ABOUT MIXED SIGNALS?
KAREN: THIS IS NOT A MIXED SIGNAL, 'BRINA.
I WONDER IF THAT HO TEXTED HIM.
- KAREN... - NOPE.
THAT IS WHAT HAPPENED, 'BRINA.
SHE TEXTED HIM, AND SHE TOLD HIM TO COME ON OVER.
SHE TOLD HIM TO COME ON!
YOU KNOW I HATE IT WHEN YOU GO DOWN THIS RABBIT HOLE.
I'M TELLING YOU!
SABRINA: BUT YOU DON'T KNOW THAT TO BE TRUE.
YOU KNOW WHAT, I KNOW WHO WILL.
KAREN, NO. DO NOT INVOLVE DANNI.
SABRINA: PLEASE DON'T INVOLVE HER.
YOU KNOW SHE'S LIKE THE INSTA-FBI.
SHE'S GONNA BE ALL OVER SOCIAL MEDIA TRYING TO PUT THIS ALL TOGETHER.
OK, I'M NOT GONNA TELL HER, OK?
'CAUSE I AIN'T RUNNIN' AFTER HIM NO MORE.
SABRINA: GOOD. LOOK, I GOTTA GO
'CAUSE I GOTTA OPEN UP THIS BANK,
AND I WILL TALK TO YOU LATER.
OK.
AND TELL DANNI I SAID HI. - WHAT?
OH, YOU WILL BE CALLING HER BY LUNCH.
NO, I WILL NOT, OK? BYE.
OK. I'LL TALK TO YOU LATER. BYE.
SHIT.
OH, GOOD MORNING!
MAURICE: SABRINA, I JUST WANTED YOU TO WITNESS THIS.
MAN: I'VE GOT A DELIVERY FOR--
MAURICE: ME, DARLING.
- ARE YOU SABRINA HOLLINS? - OH!
MAURICE: NO, THAT THOT IS RIGHT THERE.
YOU A HATER. THAT'S ME.
- SIGN RIGHT HERE. - THANK YOU.
WOW.
UGLY-ASS FLOWERS. I DON'T LIKE 'EM NO WAY.
WHAT YOU SIGNIN', GIRL? THE DECLARATION OF INDEPENDENCE?
- THANK YOU. - THANK YOU SO MUCH.
WHO THEY FROM?
MMM...
CALVIN.
OH, "THANKS FOR A GREAT DINNER
"AND I CAN'T WAIT TO SEE YOU AGAIN
SO YOU CAN TELL ME IT WAS BLACK." HA!
WHAT'S BLACK?
MMM...WE WERE AT DINNER, AND HE WAS JUST MAKING THIS JOKE
ABOUT HOW MY DRESS IS BLUE, BUT IT'S BLACK.
IT WAS SUPER FUNNY.
THAT DON'T SOUND FUNNY TO ME.
YOU ARE THE WORST.
SO, DID YOU SLEEP WITH HIM, GIRL?
WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?
I KNOW YOU WENT OUT WITH MY MAN,
SO I JUST NEED TO KNOW DID YOU TAKE HIM HOME
AND DO THE DAMN THING OR NOT?
NO.
HE JUST SEEMS LIKE A NICE GUY.
WELL, SENDING FLOWERS AND SHIT, IT SEEMS--
HUSH UP.
YOU GONNA SEE HIM AGAIN?
AS A MATTER OF FACT, I MIGHT.
MMM...
- IT DOES SAY "LUNCH?" - DON'T.
WHAT?
DON'T MAKE YOURSELF SO AVAILABLE.
I'M NOT MAKING MYSELF AVAILABLE!
I'M NOT DOING ANYTHING.
THEN FIND SOMETHING TO DO.
YOU CAN'T BE AVAILABLE EVERY TIME HE CALLS.
I'M NOT PLAYING THOSE GAMES.
YOU CAN'T WIN UNLESS YOU PLAY THE GAME.
I'M NOT DOING THAT.
COOL. WELL, BE AVAILABLE.
HE'LL BE GONE IN 2 WEEKS.
HOW DO YOU KNOW THAT?
HMM. I KNOW MEN, SABRINA.
I AM ONE.
WELL...
WHAT ARE YOU TRYING TO SAY?
NO. HOLD ON, HOLD ON. DON'T GET OFFENDED.
- OF COURSE YOU'RE A MAN. - OH, YEAH.
OH, YES, YOU'RE A MAN, BUT I MEAN...
YOU WERE A LITTLE MISLEADING.
HUH? YOU DID SAY THAT HE WAS INTO YOU.
NO, I STILL STAND BY THAT.
YOU'RE CLEARLY WRONG.
COOL.
ENJOY YOUR 2 WEEKS.
WHEN'S THE LAST TIME YOU HAD A RELATIONSHIP
THAT LASTED LONGER THAN 2 WEEKS?
EXACTLY MY POINT.
[POPS LIPS]
GO OPEN THE DOOR.
WE GOT A BANK TO RUN.
KAREN: BE ABOUT 30 MINUTES UNDER THE DRYER, THEN YOU'LL BE RIGHT OUT, OK?
WOMAN: YEAH.
KAREN: YOU CAME EARLY TODAY, TOO, HUH?
- HEY. - HEY, GIRL.
KAREN: TITO, YOU COME BRING HER UNDER THE DRYER?
GO AHEAD, BABY. GO AHEAD.
ANDI: HEY.
KAREN: GIRL, YOU LOOK LIKE I FEEL. WHAT'S UP?
ANDI: NOPE. YOU FIRST.
NO. YOU GO AHEAD.
NO. YOU TELL ME.
- GARY. - ZAC.
LOOK, I'M SORRY. GO AHEAD. GO ON.
NO. I...
YOU FIRST.
ZAC LEFT THIS MORNING WITHOUT PUTTING UP A FIGHT,
AND I JUST...I THINK HE'S WITH THAT GIRL.
- OH, DAMN. WHAT THE HELL? - I KNOW.
EVERY BLACK WOMAN IN THE CITY CAN'T BE GOING THROUGH THIS SHIT.
CAN'T BE.
ALL RIGHT, COME ON. I'M HUNGRY.
OK, BUT I'M MEETING UP WITH DANNI.
WAIT. THEN WE WON'T BE ABLE TO TALK ABOUT THIS.
I KNOW. SHE GONNA BE TOO BUSY TALKING ABOUT MY SITUATION ANYWAY.
MMM, GOOD POINT. GIVE ME A BREAK.
- RIGHT. - WELL, IS BRI COMING?
NO, SHE GOT A DATE.
WITH THE GUY FROM LAST NIGHT?
KAREN: MM-HMM.
OH, HE'S TAKING HER OUT AGAIN?
LUNCH, APPARENTLY.
WOW.
WELL, I HOPE SHE HAS BETTER LUCK THAN ME.
I MEAN US.
NO, ZAC'S GONE. YOU MEAN YOU.
- NO, I MEAN US. - YOU READY?
ANDI: OH, YOU GONNA CHANGE THE SUBJECT?
- ARE YOU READY? - I'M READY. CAN WE EAT?
[KAREN SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY]
HA HA! ARE YOU SERIOUS?
YOU MEAN TO TELL ME YOU'VE NEVER COME HERE BEFORE?
NO.
OH, WHAT, IT'S TOO MUCH OF A DIVE FOR YOU?
- NO. - HMM.
I MEAN, I LOVE IT.
I JUST CAN'T, YOU KNOW, EAT LIKE THIS EVERY DAY.
THIS GROWN-WOMAN WEIGHT WON'T FALL OFF LIKE IT USED TO.
GIRL, WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?
YOU LOOK TERRIFIC. STOP IT.
YOU SEE THAT RIGHT THERE?
WHAT?
YOUR SMILE IS...
IT'S LIKE LIFE.
OK, STOP.
NO. YOUR SMILE IS WHAT LIFE SHOULD BE.
YOU'RE BEAUTIFUL.
OK, CALVIN. WHAT--WHAT'S UP?
WHERE IS YOUR GIRLFRIEND?
OH, WOW! I KNEW THIS WAS COMING.
WELL, YOU DID ASK ME.
ALL RIGHT. WELL, THERE'S THE DOOR IF YOU WANT TO RUN, 'CAUSE...
NOPE. I'M READY. GO.
OK.
WELL, I AM SINGLE BECAUSE I HAVE A KID
AND A BABY MAMA THAT'S BAT-SHIT CRAZY.
HMM. OK.
WHY DIDN'T YOU TWO MAKE IT?
DID YOU NOT HEAR THE CRAZY PART?
YES, BUT THERE HAD TO HAVE BEEN A TIME WHEN YOU FOUND HER ATTRACTIVE, RIGHT?
ARE WE SPEAKING HONESTLY?
THAT'S THE ONLY WAY I WANT TO SPEAK.
IT WAS HER BODY.
WOW. THAT IS SO SHALLOW.
NO, NO, NO, WAIT. BEFORE YOU START DRAGGING ME,
ALL RIGHT, LIKE ANY OTHER MAN, I SAW HER, THOUGHT SHE WAS SEXY.
- WHERE? - I HIT HER UP.
- ON THE 'GRAM? - YEAH.
ALL RIGHT, GO AHEAD, KEEP GOING.
THANK YOU.
SO, I HIT HER UP, YOU KNOW, SLID IN HER DM.
WE KNEW EACH OTHER FOR, LIKE, 2 DAYS.
NEXT THING I KNOW, SHE'S TALKING ABOUT THAT SHE LOVES ME
AND SHE WANTS TO BE WITH ME, AND IT WAS--AGHH!
THAT'S SCARY.
YEAH, TELL ME ABOUT IT.
THAT'S NOT EVEN THE SCARY PART.
WE ONLY HAD SEX ONE TIME.
NOW I GOT A BABY BOY.
- WOW! - YEAH.
BUT YOU DO IT ONLY TAKES ONE TIME, RIGHT?
YEAH. I KNOW.
I MEAN, MY BABY BOY-- HE'S...AMAZING, BUT...
THE BABY MAMA--
BOTH: BAT-SHIT CRAZY!
- RIGHT. SO YOU UNDERSTAND. - I GOT IT.
IT'S CRAZY.
LAZ: CALVIN?
OH, MY GOD! LAZ?
OH, MY GOD!
MWAH!
- IT IS SO GOOD TO SEE YOU. - IT'S GOOD TO SEE YOU.
- I CAN'T BELIEVE IT! - THIS IS CRAZY.
- IT IS. - HOW YOU BEEN?
- SO GOOD. - GOOD.
OH, I'M SO SORRY. SABRINA, THIS IS LAZ.
LAZ, THIS IS SABRINA.
- HI! - HI.
OH, MY GOD. MY CAR'S OUTSIDE.
LAZ: WILL YOU PLEASE CALL ME? I MISS YOU!
- I MISS YOU! - PLEASE?
- PLEASE CALL ME. PLEASE. - I DEFINITELY WILL.
CALVIN: DEFINITELY, MAN. YOU ALREADY KNOW.
OK, 'CAUSE THAT THING YOU DID LAST TIME I SAW YOU,
I AM STILL IN PAIN!
OH, MY GOD. I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU REMEMBER--
LAZ: OF COURSE I DO. IT WAS GOOD TO MEET YOU, KATRINA.
IT'S SABRI...
WOW! MMM, MMM, MMM.
GOOD OLD LAZ.
AH...MMM.
MM-HMM. YOU HAVE A LITTLE LIP--
OH. HA HA!
SABRINA: MMM. GOOD OL'...
GOTTA GO. YOU KNOW, I HAVE AN APPOINTMENT,
SO I THINK I SHOULD GET OUT OF HERE.
OK. WELL, GUESS I'LL JUST GO GRAB THE CHECK.
UH-HUH.
THAT'S HIM TEXTING YOU?
NO, IT'S BRI.
OH. WHAT SHE SAYING?
SHE ASKS WHERE WE ARE AND SHE SAID, "DON'T MOVE."
SHE'S ON THE WAY, APPARENTLY.
WELL...
YOU BETTER HURRY UP AND FINISH THIS CONVERSATION
BEFORE SHE AND DANNI GET HERE.
GIRL, WHAT AM I GONNA DO?
WHAT ELSE DID SHE SAY?
I MEAN SOME OF EVERYTHING.
THE MAN SHE DESCRIBED-- SHE SAID HE YELLS AT HER
AND HE BELITTLES HER AND--
I MEAN, I'VE NEVER SEEN ANY OF THAT.
ANDI, YOU CAN'T TAKE THAT LADY'S CASE.
I KNOW.
I'M JUST GONNA GO BACK TO MY JOB
AND I'M GONNA TELL 'EM I CAN'T DO IT.
WHAT REASON WILL YOU GIVE 'EM?
YOU'RE GONNA HELP ME THINK OF THAT.
- OH. - PLEASE?
MMM...UM-MMM.
I DON'T KNOW. I REALLY DON'T.
I DON'T KNOW NOTHIN' ABOUT LOVE, SO--
NEITHER DO I, APPARENTLY.
ANDI, YOU COULD LOSE YOUR JOB.
YOU REMEMBER HOW HARD YOU WORKED IN LAW SCHOOL.
YOU CAN'T LOSE THAT FOR THAT MAN.
YEAH.
AND, GIRL, SHE HIRED A PRIVATE DETECTIVE
TO FOLLOW HIM EVERY MORNING.
WHEN HE'S WITH YOU?
THEY'RE TRYING TO FIGURE OUT WHY HE PARKS IN HIS BUILDING
AND WAITS AN HOUR TO GO TO WORKOUT.
YOUR BUILDING.
- YES. - GIRL...
THE GYM IS ACROSS THE STREET.
I DON'T LIKE THIS. I DON'T LIKE THIS AT ALL.
NEITHER DO I, BUT I HAVE TO TELL MY BOSS.
WHY DID SHE CHOOSE ME?
GIRL...
WHAT?
YOU THINK SHE KNOWS?
NO.
WAIT. WHAT IF SHE KNOWS IT'S YOU
AND SHE'S MESSING WITH YOU, ANDI?
I DON'T THINK SHE'LL GO THROUGH THE TROUBLE
OF DOING ALL THAT JUST TO MESS WITH ME.
- LOOK-- - THAT'S CRA--
DON'T PUT IT PAST HER.
JUST TALK TO YOUR BOSS.
OK...
[FOOTSTEPS APPROACHING]
HEY, GIRL. GO AHEAD, SIT DOWN.
KAREN: HOW YOU DOING?
- HEY. - HOW ARE YOU?
I'M SORRY. I JUST...
KAREN: FOR WHAT?
DANNI: WELL, WHAT HE DO NOW?
KAREN: GIRL, I JUST WANTED TO TAKE YOU TO LUNCH. STOP!
WHAT DID I DO?
NOTHING!
YOU TWO NEVER CALL ME FOR LUNCH.
WELL, I WANTED TO.
OH, OK.
UH...YEAH, SO I DID CHARGE MY AMAZON BILL TO YOUR ACCOUNT,
BUT YOU KNOW I'M GONNA PAY YOU BACK, KAREN.
GOTTA BRING ME HERE, SHAKE ME DOWN,
I DIDN'T KNOW YOU DID THAT, DANNI.
FORGET I SAID THAT UNTIL THE 1st.
I JUST WANTED TO BRING YOU TO LUNCH. THAT'S IT, SO...
DANNI: OH, SHIT. WHO DIED?
- OH, MY GOD. - WHAT DID YOU DO?
ANDI: COME ON. NOBODY DIED. OK?
I JUST WANTED TO TALK TO YOU. THAT'S ALL.
OK.
KAREN: ZAC SAID SOME THINGS,
AND I JUST WANTED TO GET YOUR OPINION ON IT. THAT'S ALL.
YOU KNOW WHAT, I'M JUST-- I'M NOT HOOKING ANYONE ELSE UP.
YOU KNOW, UM...
I SHOULD JUST WHOOP HIS ASS.
WHAT DID HE DO NOW? CAN I GET A DRINK, PLEASE?
KAREN: GIRL, YOU ABOUT TO GO BACK TO WORK.
- WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? - RIGHT? EXACTLY.
IT'LL HELP ME FROM KILLING THE BITCH.
I NEED PEACH VODKA.
THAT'S WHAT HE DID.
- NO. DOESN'T SOUND RIGHT. - I KNOW!
AM I BEING CRAZY?
YES.
NO. HE GOT UP AND LEFT WITHOUT A FIGHT?
RIGHT.
HE WITH THAT HO.
- OK, SEE, YOU-- - YOU THINK SO?
YOU TWO--YOU DON'T NEED TO TALK TO EACH OTHER.
YOU MAKE EACH OTHER CRAZY.
NO, KAREN, YOU RIGHT.
HE WITH THAT HO!
- YOU THINK SO, RIGHT? - YEAH!
DANNI: SHE PROBABLY CALLED HIM THIS MORNING
AND TOLD HIM HE CAN COME STAY WITH HER.
- THAT'S WHAT I SAID, ANDI! - DON'T DO THIS, KAREN.
I PROMISE YOU, I CAN FIND OUT.
- THANK YOU, GIRL. - I WILL.
- I JUST WANT TO KNOW. - I GOT YOU.
ANDI: HEY, GIRL. YOU'RE LATE. WE GOTTA GO BACK TO WORK.
HE KISSED A MAN.
OH, WE GOTTA TALK.
WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?
WELL...
WE WERE SITTING IN THERE, AND THEN THIS GUY COMES IN.
AND I MEAN, THAT BITCH WAS...BEAT.
- OH... - OH...
SABRINA: HE HAD THE HEELS AND THE HEADWRAP,
BUT A FULL BEARD.
AND THE EYEBROWS WERE ARCHED.
YASSS, HONEY.
STOP IT.
YOU TALKIN' ABOUT THE MAN THAT YOU MET LAST NIGHT?
CALVIN.
- YES. - OK.
I MEAN, THEN THE GUY, YOU KNOW, HE COMES UP AND THEY GREET
AND THEY SAY HI, AND THEN THEY HUG...
REALLY, REALLY TIGHT.
AND THEN THE GUY SAYS...
"THE LAST TIME I SAW YOU, YOU WERE IN SO MUCH PAIN."
- OH... - OH...
WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
I'M SEEING HOW MUCH ROOM I GOT TO FALL OUT!
- STOP IT, DANNI! - HA HA!
- THIS IS NOT FUNNY. - SORRY, SORRY.
- DANNI, STOP. - I'M NOT...
KAREN: STOP. OK? GO AHEAD. GO AHEAD, 'BRINA.
I'M LISTENING. DANNI!
ANDI: OK. DID HE INTRODUCE YOU?
YES.
ANDI: GOOD. DID HE SAY WHO HE WAS?
HE DIDN'T SAY A DAMN THING.
MAYBE BECAUSE THERE'S NOTHING TO TELL.
KAREN: MAYBE.
OR HE'S BEEN GETTING THAT TAIL
AND PINNING THE DICK ON THE DONKEY.
DANNI.
OF COURSE. OF COURSE. WHY DO I EVEN TELL YOU ANYTHING?
KAREN: YOU KNOW THAT'S WHY YOU CONFIDE.
SABRINA: OH, I'M NOT TALKING TO HIM NO MORE.
ANDI: WAIT A MINUTE, 'BRINA. WHY DON'T YOU JUST ASK HIM?
NO, LOOK. THIS IS WHAT YOU DO.
DANNI: YOU TAKE HIM HOME, YOU PULL OUT YOUR VIBRATOR.
WHEN HE SEES YOU, YOU KNOW, YOU LET HIM GO UP IN THERE WITH IT.
UM, COULD WE NOT DO THIS AT LUNCH?
OH, DON'T ACT LIKE YOU WASN'T ... GARY LAST NIGHT,
THE MAN YOU CLAIM YOU GONNA BE LEAVING.
AHEM.
DID YOU BREAK IT OFF?
IT'S A VERY NICE PLACE, ACTUALLY.
DID YOU BREAK IT OFF?
ANDI: UM...NO.
- THE DICK-- - BUT I WILL.
I WILL...SOON.
DANNI: YEAH, YEAH, YEAH. THAT D TOO GOOD.
AND HE'S FINE AS HELL.
THAT'S TRUE.
DANNI: DARK-SKINNED BROTHER HAVE YOU FEENIN'...
ALSO TRUE.
WAIT A MINUTE.
WHAT?
YOU REALLY CALLED HER ABOUT THAT?
OH, NO. NO.
NO.
AND YOU'RE REALLY GONNA LISTEN TO HER?
YOU KNOW SHE'S ALWAYS GOING OFF THE DEEP END.
- TRUE. - THAT'S WHERE THE TRUTH IS.
- SOMETIMES. - LIKE THAT TIME WHEN...
WHAT'S HIS NAME?
- CRAIG. - IT'S CRAIG.
CRAIG--HE WAS--YEAH, YOU THOUGHT HE WAS CHEATING ON YOU,
BUT YOU ACTUALLY CHASED HIS MAMA DOWN.
GIRL, YOU BROKE THAT WOMAN'S HIP.
I SHOULDA. NOBODY TOLD THAT OLD BITCH TO BE IN RED BOTTOMS.
SHE LOOKED YOUNG FROM THE BACK!
SHE'S 70.
SHE WAS STILL SMALLER THAN ME
WITH THEM BRITTLE-ASS BONES.
YOU'RE LUCKY YOU DIDN'T GET SUED.
I DIDN'T KNOW THE BITCH HAD OSTEOPOROSIS.
I CONTRIBUTED TO THE FUND AFTERWARDS.
OK. ALL I CAN SAY, DON'T LISTEN TO HER.
JUST MAKING MY POINT.
GOOD POINT.
- IT'S OVER. YOU GOOD. - THANK YOU.
'CAUSE I'M TELLING THE TRUTH, ALL RIGHT.
LISTEN, I'LL SHOW YOU. COME TO MY HOUSE TONIGHT.
WE'LL GO THROUGH THE 'GRAM--
- OK. - NO.
AND I'LL PUT IT ALL TOGETHER FOR YOU.
- YES! - FOR A SMALL FEE.
SABRINA: DON'T DO IT.
BRING WINE AND WEED. BUT I GOTS TO GO.
KAREN: YEAH, LISTEN, CALL ME WHEN HE CALLS YOU.
- DID Y'ALL PAY THE BILL? - NO. YOU GOT IT, RIGHT?
- YEP. OH. - I'M TRAPPED! HELP ME!
- HELP YOURSELF! - AAH!
BYE!
THOSE AREN'T MY FRIENDS.
- YOU'RE LATE. - I'M SORRY.
YOU KNOW I CANNOT LEAVE UNTIL YOU COME BACK.
I KNOW. I SAID I'M SORRY.
SO HOW WAS LUNCH?
GOOD.
WHAT WAS HE WEARING?
JEANS.
DID HE SMELL GOOD, GIRL?
OK. WHERE IS YOUR HEAD AT?
NOWHERE. IT'S JUST I LOOK BOOK, CHAPTER, AND VERSE.
DON'T YOU HAVE TO GO TO LUNCH?
OH, GIRL, I CAN EAT AND TALK.
GREAT.
TELL ME, GIRL.
OK. CAN I ASK YOU SOMETHING?
OH, THIS FELLA BE GOOD, HUH.
NEVER MIND.
DON'T DO THAT. COME ON.
WHAT DID HE DO? TELL EXTRAVAGANZA!
WHO'S EXTRAVAGANZA?
THAT'S MY DRAG NAME.
HMM. THAT'S CUTE.
WHAT DID HE DO?
IS IT WRONG FOR ME TO ASSUME THAT A MAN'S GAY
BECAUSE HE HAS GAY FRIENDS?
OH, YEAH, THAT'S IGNORANT AS SHIT.
YOU'RE RIGHT.
WHAT KIND OF GAY FRIEND?
WHAT DO YOU MEAN?
YOU KNOW, THE L, THE G, THE B, THE T, THE Q, THE I, OR THE A?
WHY DOES THAT MATTER?
WELL, IT DOESN'T MATTER.
IF THE FRIEND'S A LES, BUT...
WELL, I MEAN, THERE WAS THIS GUY WHO CAME INTO THE RESTAURANT.
YOU KNOW, HIS NAME IS LAZ.
NOW, WAS HIS NAME LAZ OR WAS HIS NAME LAZZ!
MAURICE.
- ANYWAY-- - MM-HMM.
THEY GREETED EACH OTHER AND THEY HUGGED AND THEN THEY KISSED.
WAIT, WAIT, WAIT.
WHERE HE KISS THE MAN?
ON THE LIPS.
AW, YEAH, GIRL. HE JUST AS GAY
AS MY UNICORN PICNIC BASKET.
OK, NOTHING WRONG WITH THAT, BUT IT'S TRUE.
COME ON, WILL YOU TALK TO ME?
DO YOU LIKE HIM?
NO.
YES, YOU DO.
BECAUSE IF YOU DIDN'T, YOU WOULDN'T BE BOTHERED.
I MEAN, HE JUST SEEMS LIKE A REALLY NICE GUY.
I WAS JUST THROWN OFF BY THAT.
JUST ASK HIM.
I ALREADY DID. HE TOLD ME HE WAS STRAIGHT.
STRAIGHT STRAIGHT OR STRAIGHT WITH A TWIST?
CAN'T YOU JUST FIND OUT IF HE IS AND, LIKE, YOU KNOW,
ASK AROUND OR SOMETHING?
ABSOLUTELY. HOW ABOUT I JUST HOP ON THE QUEEN'S HOTLINE
AND SEE IF ANYBODY KNOWS HIM
'CAUSE ALL OF US GAYS KNOW EACH OTHER!
YOU KNOW WHAT, YOU'RE JUST BEING SILLY.
I DON'T WANT TO TALK TO YOU.
JUST ASK THE MAN, OK?
YOU SUCK.
AND YOU BETTER HOPE YOUR MAN DON'T SWALLOW. OK? HA HA!
SUCH AN ASSHOLE.
OH HO! THAT TOO!
GET BACK TO WORK. NEXT, PLEASE!
HI, HOW ARE YOU?
I'M ABOUT TO LEAVE. HOW DID IT GO?
I NEED TO TALK TO YOU, SIR.
OK. SOUNDS SERIOUS.
YES, IT IS.
I THINK I KNOW WHAT THIS IS ABOUT.
YOU DO?
YEAH. I WAS LOOKING OVER THE SALARY OFFER WE MADE YOU,
AND IT'S REALLY LOW AND UNFAIR.
I THINK WE SHOULD BUMP IT ABOUT 11%.
THAT'LL PUT YOU RIGHT ON PAR WITH NELSON, OUR OTHER RECRUIT.
WELL, I APPRECIATE THAT--
AND HE DID GO TO HARVARD, YOU KNOW.
YES, BUT I ALSO--
LISTEN, I DON'T WANT TO GET INTO NEGOTIATING WITH YOU.
YOU'RE A HELL OF A NEGOTIATOR,
AND I KNOW YOU HAVE OTHER OFFERS.
AND IF YOU DON'T, YOU WILL.
I JUST WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU'RE HAPPY HERE.
I CAN'T REPRESENT JASMINE BORDERS.
WHY?
BECAUSE THERE IS A CLEAR CONFLICT OF INTEREST.
HOW CONFLICTED?
IT'S EXTREME.
DON: THAT'S REALLY DISAPPOINTING.
I'M SORRY, TOO, BECAUSE I THINK I'M GONNA HAVE TO HOLD OFF
ON THAT SALARY OFFER.
I DON'T THINK YOU UNDERSTAND, BUT HELEN, WHO RECOMMENDED HER,
IS THE HEAD OF THE RHINEHOUSE, THE ELITE WOMEN OF THIS TOWN.
THEY MEET EVERY WEDNESDAY TO TALK ABOUT SCHOOL, KIDS,
WHATEVER THEIR HUSBANDS ARE DOING.
MORRIS AND WINSTON HAD THEM FOR YEARS
AND MADE MILLIONS,
AND YOU BROUGHT THEM TO US.
I CAN STILL DO MY JOB.
DON: NOT IF YOU TURN TAIL ON YOUR BEST FRIEND.
BUT THE CONFLICT IS GONNA--
I THINK YOU NEED TO THINK LONG AND HARD ABOUT THIS CONFLICT...
AND BE SURE THAT IT IS A CONFLICT.
I KNOW HER HUSBAND.
HOW?
I SEE.
I'M SORRY.
YOU SHOULD GO HOME.
ARE YOU FIRING ME?
NO. HELL, NO.
BUT YOU SHOULD GO HOME.
AND I WANT YOU TO THINK ABOUT WHAT I SAID.
THINK ABOUT THAT CONFLICT.
AND IS IT REALLY A CONFLICT?
ATTORNEY BARNS? WE NEVER HAD THIS CONVERSATION.
HEY, BAGGAGE, YOU GOOD? BE RIGHT BACK.
DANNI: HEY!
ZAC: COME ON, DANNI! EVERY DAY?
NO, SIR. GET YOUR ASS OFF THIS CART AND COME TALK TO ME RIGHT NOW.
I GOT TO GET THESE OLD LADIES.
DANNI...DAN--
TELL THEM OLD BITCHES IT BROKE DOWN.
DANNI, YOU MESSIN' WITH MY TIP MONEY.
WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
GIVE ME MY KEY.
HOLD ON.
THERE IT IS.
ALMOST--OH, YEAH, YEAH, YEAH.
- REALLY? - TAKE IT.
GIRL, I WILL TAKE IT.
YOU KNOW, YOU'RE MESSIN' OVER MY FRIEND, RIGHT?
SHE'S A GOOD WOMAN.
I KNOW THAT, DANNI. I KNOW IT.
THEN WHY DID YOU LEAVE?
SHE TOLD ME TO LEAVE.
- SHE DIDN'T MEAN THAT-- - YOU SEE THIS RIGHT HERE?
THIS RIGHT HERE IS WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU.
THAT'S WHY YOU'RE ALL SINGLE.
YES, 'CAUSE Y'ALL CRAZY.
I'LL SLAP THE SHIT OUT YOU.
GO AHEAD ON WITH THAT, DANNI.
MY GIRL HAS BEEN THERE FOR YOU.
I KNOW THAT. SHE NEVER LET ME FORGET IT.
AW...
WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?
SHE ALWAYS ON MY SHIT, ALL RIGHT, JUST BECAUSE I CAN'T PAY A BILL
OR I NEED TO BORROW THE CAR.
LIKE, NOBODY WANT TO HEAR THAT EVERY DAY.
I'M A GROWN-ASS MAN.
WELL, GET A BETTER JOB.
WITH MY RECORD?
I'M HAPPY AS HELL TO HAVE THIS ONE.
SO BECAUSE YOU'RE IN YOUR FEELINGS,
YOU'RE GONNA LET THE BEST THING THAT EVER HAPPENED TO YOU
JUST PASS YOU RIGHT BY?
- YOU-- - SEE THAT?
THAT'S--THAT'S KAREN.
YOU DON'T GET IT.
TELL ME.
- DANNI, I'M TRYING. - OK.
YOU KNOW I'M ON YOUR SIDE.
- YOU'RE ON MY SIDE? - YES.
SO THEN GIVE ME MY KEY BACK SO I CAN GO MAKE SOME MORE MONEY.
WHERE ARE YOU STAYING?
YOU KNOW I'LL TAKE THAT KEY, RIGHT?
DO IT.
BOY, DON'T DO THAT!
I'LL ... YOU RIGHT HERE ON THIS CARPET LIKE A RABBIT.
- DO YOU WANT THAT? - GIVE ME IT!
IN FRONT OF THESE PEOPLE?
I DON'T KNOW THEM, BUT GIVE ME THE DAMN KEY.
THAT'S NOT IT. NO.
ACTUALLY, COME ON. HELP ME OUT.
- DANNI! - SEE? SEE?
YOU WERE GONNA DO IT, WEREN'T YOU?
IT FEELS GOOD.
WHOO!
WAS GOOD TO MYSELF.
YOU AIN'T SHIT.
THANK YOU.
YOU JUST LIKE YOUR FRIEND. SHE REMINDS ME EVERY DAY.
WHY THESE KEYS SO SWEATY?
I GOT A WARM BOSOM.
ZAC: THEY'LL SHORT-CIRCUIT THE CART.
CART COMING THROUGH! CART COMING THROUGH!
YO, KHAKIS, I SAID "CART COMING THROUGH," BRO.
YOU AIN'T EVEN PAYING ATTENTION.
WOMAN: EXCUSE ME.
MAN: IT AIN'T ALL IT'S CRACKED UP TO BE.
EXCUSE ME?
MARRIAGE. TRUST ME.
OH. OK.
UH, AARON CARTER.
KAREN.
HOW ARE YOU?
TIRED. EXCUSE ME.
YOU SEE THAT RIGHT THERE, THAT ATTITUDE,
IS WHY YOU'RE SINGLE.
OH! FIRST OF ALL, YOU ASSHOLE, I'M NOT SINGLE.
AND SECOND OF ALL, WATCH WHO THE HELL YOU'RE TALKING TO.
YOU DO THE SAME WITH YOUR RUDE ASS.
RUDE. ME?
YEAH. I'M JUST SAYING HI TO YOU.
- YOU CAN'T EVEN SAY HI BACK? - WHATEVER. OK?
SEE? THAT'S WHY I DATE WHITE WOMEN.
YOU TRY AND GIVE A SISTER A CHANCE, THEY GOT ATTITUDE ABOUT EVERY DAMN THING.
OH, WAIT A MINUTE. A CHANCE?
WHAT CHANCE?
YOU AIN'T NEVER HAD A CHANCE EVEN WHEN YOU WALKED UP HERE.
OK, SO, YES, YES. SOME OF US DO HAVE AN ATTITUDE
'CAUSE WE ARE TIRED OF PLAYING WEAK
SO SORRY-ASS ...LIKE YOU COULD FEEL STRONG--
- NOW, HOLD ON-- - NO, NO, NO, NO. OK?
WE ARE TIRED OF DUMBING OURSELVES DOWN
SO THAT YOUR EGO CAN BE INFLATED.
TIRED OF PLAYING YOUR MAMA, YOUR DADDY, AND YOUR DAMN THERAPIST
WHEN ALL WE REALLY WANT TO DO IS JUST BE. HMM?
BE US, BE WOMEN.
SO GET THE ...OUT OF HERE WITH THAT SHIT, OK?
THAT WAY. BYE, ...
[CHEERING AND TALKING INDISTINCTLY]
WOMAN: ...WITH YOUR TIRED ASS.
WOMAN: NEXT TIME, BRING POPCORN.
[BEEP] GARY, ON RECORDING: HEY, BABE.
BEEN CALLING YOU ALL DAY.
I JUST CALLED INTO ALBUQUERQUE, LAST-MINUTE THINGS.
SO I CAN'T SEE YOU TOMORROW MORNING.
I LOVE YOU. HOPE YOU'RE KICKING ASS TODAY.
AARON: HEY.
LEAVE ME ALONE.
PLEASE?
YOU WANT TO GET CUSSED OUT AGAIN?
I JUST WANT TO APOLOGIZE.
OK, GOOD. NOW YOU CAN BE GONE.
AARON: COME ON, LOOK. I'M GOING THROUGH SOME THINGS, TOO, ALL RIGHT?
I JUST FOUND OUT MY WIFE IS SCREWING AROUND ON ME.
I'M MAD. I CAME OUT HERE. I SAW YOU, AND I ENDED UP TAKING IT OUT ON YOU
WHEN IT'S REALLY ALL MY STUFF, SO I APOLOGIZE.
WAS SHE WHITE?
I DON'T KNOW WHY RACE REALLY HAS TO COME INTO IT.
OH, SHE WAS WHITE.
AARON: LOOK...
I GOT SOME ICE CREAM, TOO.
DO YOU WANT SOME COMPANY?
I DON'T KNOW YOU.
YOU CUSSED ME OUT LIKE YOU DID.
CAN YOU LEAVE ME ALONE, PLEASE?
ALL RIGHT.
WELL, YOU GOT THE RIGHT IDEA, SO...
I'LL BE OVER SITTING IN MY TRUCK
GOING INTO A SUGAR COMA, TOO.
- DO THAT. - YEAH.
WAIT, UM... KIND YOU GOT?
VANILLA?
THANKS.
REALLY?
GET IN.
CAN WE START OVER?
I'M AARON.
KAREN.
IT'S NICE TO MEET YOU, KAREN.
YOU, TOO.
THANKS FOR THE ICE CREAM.
OH, MY FEET ARE KILLING ME.
WHAT THE ...
ANNOUNCER: NEXT ON "SISTAS"...
- HAVE A SEAT. - HONORED TO BE INVITED.
- WHAT ARE YOU HAVING? - ANYTHING BLACK.
I'M JUST MAD AT EVERY MAN IN THE WORLD TODAY.
I WISH I COULD JUST SHOOT FIRE FROM MY BOOBS AND BURN 'EM ALL OFF THE PLANET.
DAMN, THAT'S HARSH.
YOU NOT GONNA ASK FOR MY NUMBER?
I AM NOT GONNA LET SOME HORRIBLE, MISERABLE
WICKED PERSON WITHOUT A SOUL DESTROY MY MARRIAGE.
JASMINE: ANYONE WHO SLEEPS WITH ANOTHER PERSON'S HUSBAND
IS CLEARLY THE DEVIL.
I AM TIRED OF YOUR BULLSHIT!
- BABY-- - NO, GET OUT!
- BABY, PLEASE. - GET OUT!