1
00:00:05,900 --> 00:00:10,070
(wind howling)
2
00:00:10,133 --> 00:00:12,433
(seagull squawking)
3
00:00:12,500 --> 00:00:14,300
Professor,
can I ask you a question?
4
00:00:14,366 --> 00:00:16,826
Sure, Kanye, anything.
5
00:00:16,900 --> 00:00:18,730
You think Drake is cool?
6
00:00:18,800 --> 00:00:23,030
Yes, I still have
"Hotline Bling" as my ringtone.
7
00:00:23,100 --> 00:00:24,670
Yeah? What else?
8
00:00:24,733 --> 00:00:27,673
Do you like his hairstyle
better, his beard?
9
00:00:27,733 --> 00:00:29,633
No, not better.
10
00:00:29,700 --> 00:00:30,730
They're about equal.
11
00:00:30,800 --> 00:00:32,900
Well, I was doing both first.
12
00:00:32,966 --> 00:00:34,066
And you know what else?
13
00:00:34,133 --> 00:00:37,033
That dance move,
that was my idea too.
14
00:00:37,100 --> 00:00:39,370
See?
15
00:00:41,700 --> 00:00:43,800
This always happens to me.
16
00:00:43,866 --> 00:00:46,566
I change the game, and someone
else gets the credit.
17
00:00:46,633 --> 00:00:47,673
See?
18
00:00:48,766 --> 00:00:51,266
Grindr, my idea.
19
00:00:51,333 --> 00:00:53,273
Wikipedia, iPod Nano,
20
00:00:53,333 --> 00:00:55,773
the TV show "Cake Boss,"
all me.
21
00:00:55,833 --> 00:00:57,633
Now this?
22
00:00:57,700 --> 00:01:01,270
Well, fuck you, Buddy Valastro,
and fuck you, Drake.
23
00:01:01,333 --> 00:01:04,503
(light electronic music)
24
00:01:04,566 --> 00:01:11,496
♪♪ ♪♪
25
00:01:12,833 --> 00:01:14,303
DAVID: Meg, for the last time,
26
00:01:14,366 --> 00:01:16,066
if you don't think
Led Zeppelin
27
00:01:16,133 --> 00:01:18,103
is the greatest rock band
of all time,
28
00:01:18,166 --> 00:01:20,066
then on some fundamental level,
29
00:01:20,133 --> 00:01:23,533
you don't even understand
what rock music even is.
30
00:01:23,600 --> 00:01:25,600
I'm fine with that.
Rock music is for dads.
31
00:01:25,666 --> 00:01:26,866
DAVID: It's one of
the best musical genres
32
00:01:26,933 --> 00:01:28,333
‐of all time.
‐Uh, nope.
33
00:01:28,400 --> 00:01:30,930
That's why they call it
rock music‐‐because it rocks.
34
00:01:31,000 --> 00:01:32,630
Whatever,
genres are for dads.
35
00:01:32,700 --> 00:01:34,370
This is breaking my heart,
'cause I'm a smart guy,
36
00:01:34,433 --> 00:01:35,933
and you should
take my opinions seriously.
37
00:01:36,000 --> 00:01:36,930
(hip‐hop music)
38
00:01:37,000 --> 00:01:38,600
Sorry, can't hear you!
39
00:01:38,666 --> 00:01:40,596
(indistinct singing)
40
00:01:40,666 --> 00:01:42,496
What the fuck is
this music right now,
41
00:01:42,566 --> 00:01:44,666
‐this mumbling shit?
‐ It's Lil Blurp's new mixtape.
42
00:01:44,733 --> 00:01:48,033
Ugh, you know, this sounds
like an upset stomach
43
00:01:48,100 --> 00:01:51,100
somehow fucking a headache,
44
00:01:51,166 --> 00:01:53,166
and I don't like
how it makes me feel.
45
00:01:53,233 --> 00:01:55,333
So?
Feelings are for dads.
46
00:01:55,400 --> 00:01:57,600
Oh, my God, will you shut up
for one second about dads?
47
00:01:57,666 --> 00:01:58,926
‐(phone rings)
‐JOHN: No, thanks.
48
00:01:59,000 --> 00:02:01,130
‐Is that your dad?
‐Uh, no comment.
49
00:02:01,200 --> 00:02:02,700
Ooh, Meg, is this
a first pressing
50
00:02:02,766 --> 00:02:03,996
of Swordfish Trombones?
51
00:02:04,066 --> 00:02:04,996
John, you should put down
that dumb record
52
00:02:05,066 --> 00:02:05,996
and call your dad.
53
00:02:06,066 --> 00:02:07,566
It's Sunday, man.
54
00:02:07,633 --> 00:02:11,003
Yes, and I deserve one Sunday
where I'm not held hostage
55
00:02:11,066 --> 00:02:12,926
to my dad's go‐nowhere stories.
56
00:02:13,000 --> 00:02:14,430
Ooh, what's wrong
with his dad?
57
00:02:14,500 --> 00:02:15,770
There's nothing with his dad!
58
00:02:15,833 --> 00:02:17,373
Mr. Hunchman is the greatest
guy who ever lived.
59
00:02:17,433 --> 00:02:18,673
He's always like,
"Oh, son, do I have
60
00:02:18,733 --> 00:02:20,303
"an interesting story
to share with you today!
61
00:02:20,366 --> 00:02:21,696
"I bought a beige washcloth
62
00:02:21,766 --> 00:02:24,266
and I used my Visa card
to purchase it."
63
00:02:24,333 --> 00:02:26,903
Ugh, I find that impression
to be unnervingly accurate.
64
00:02:26,966 --> 00:02:28,526
You should talk to your dad.
65
00:02:28,600 --> 00:02:30,330
All dads are sad.
66
00:02:30,400 --> 00:02:33,230
Ah, see?
The dad expert hath spoken.
67
00:02:33,300 --> 00:02:35,300
‐Uhh...
‐Heed her words of wisdom.
68
00:02:35,366 --> 00:02:37,696
Fine, I'll talk to my dad.
69
00:02:37,766 --> 00:02:39,126
‐(sighs)
‐(phone beeps)
70
00:02:39,200 --> 00:02:40,500
‐Hey, Dad.
‐HUNCHMAN: Hey, bud.
71
00:02:40,566 --> 00:02:43,226
I was worried you lost
your phone again.
72
00:02:43,300 --> 00:02:45,730
Uh‐huh, let's hear
your interesting news.
73
00:02:45,800 --> 00:02:47,930
So you remember how
I told you last month
74
00:02:48,000 --> 00:02:50,230
I was thinking about
driving out to Pittsboro
75
00:02:50,300 --> 00:02:52,630
to check out
Dan Henry's new office?
76
00:02:52,700 --> 00:02:53,930
Yes?
77
00:02:54,000 --> 00:02:55,370
HUNCHMAN: I went to see Dan,
78
00:02:55,433 --> 00:02:56,773
who you remember
started working for me
79
00:02:56,833 --> 00:02:58,873
back when he was 24
and now, as you know‐‐
80
00:02:58,933 --> 00:03:01,303
He's got your old job.
81
00:03:01,366 --> 00:03:03,626
Yes, sir.
He got my old job,
82
00:03:03,700 --> 00:03:05,100
but not my old office!
83
00:03:05,166 --> 00:03:08,126
John, his new office
is something else.
84
00:03:08,200 --> 00:03:10,970
They got a whiteboard
in the conference room
85
00:03:11,033 --> 00:03:12,773
that isn't even a whiteboard!
86
00:03:12,833 --> 00:03:14,903
It's just a piece of glass,
87
00:03:14,966 --> 00:03:17,626
and, son, it's networked.
88
00:03:17,700 --> 00:03:19,770
‐Okay, and?
‐So if you write on it
89
00:03:19,833 --> 00:03:22,573
in Pittsboro, they could
see it at the same time
90
00:03:22,633 --> 00:03:24,073
at the main branch
in Charlotte!
91
00:03:24,133 --> 00:03:26,473
I mean, wowie McGowie!
92
00:03:26,533 --> 00:03:27,873
Okay.
93
00:03:27,933 --> 00:03:30,433
But there was something else
I wanted to tell you.
94
00:03:30,500 --> 00:03:31,370
(bell chimes)
95
00:03:31,433 --> 00:03:32,973
Well, that was a very long walk
96
00:03:33,033 --> 00:03:34,303
to a surprising destination.
97
00:03:34,366 --> 00:03:35,666
Dude, look, this is insane.
98
00:03:35,733 --> 00:03:38,203
This is Lil Blurp's Instagram
from yesterday.
99
00:03:38,266 --> 00:03:40,026
"Shout‐out to my fans,
my brands,
100
00:03:40,100 --> 00:03:41,600
‐and, most of all..."
‐JOHN: Mm‐hmm.
101
00:03:41,666 --> 00:03:44,196
"This homie right here," and
guess who he's standing with.
102
00:03:44,266 --> 00:03:46,296
JOHN: Uh, let me guess.
My dad?
103
00:03:46,366 --> 00:03:48,396
Wait, your dad
knows Lil Blurp?
104
00:03:48,466 --> 00:03:50,226
I mean, what is happening
right now?
105
00:03:50,300 --> 00:03:51,700
Well, David,
as I've just learned,
106
00:03:51,766 --> 00:03:55,596
my dad is apparently Dicktown's
biggest mumble rap mogul.
107
00:03:55,666 --> 00:03:57,466
Dear Lord, we thank you
for this blessing
108
00:03:57,533 --> 00:03:59,633
and this miracle.
This is so awesome!
109
00:03:59,700 --> 00:04:02,070
What's more, he was
calling with a case for us.
110
00:04:02,133 --> 00:04:03,573
And, Lord, P. S.,
just when I thought
111
00:04:03,633 --> 00:04:05,003
this couldn't get
more wonderful,
112
00:04:05,066 --> 00:04:07,826
you bless us with the fact
that we are about to become
113
00:04:07,900 --> 00:04:09,030
rap detectives, John?
114
00:04:09,100 --> 00:04:10,730
Huh, I guess
that's right, David.
115
00:04:10,800 --> 00:04:13,830
We are now rap detectives.
116
00:04:13,900 --> 00:04:16,830
(dramatic music)
117
00:04:16,900 --> 00:04:19,730
♪♪ ♪♪
118
00:04:19,800 --> 00:04:22,030
(lively electronic music)
119
00:04:25,200 --> 00:04:28,130
(light percussive music)
120
00:04:28,200 --> 00:04:30,030
Gentlemen, thanks for coming
to this meeting
121
00:04:30,100 --> 00:04:31,630
at such short notice.
122
00:04:31,700 --> 00:04:32,900
Greg,
it's past midnight.
123
00:04:32,966 --> 00:04:34,166
Yeah, spit it out.
124
00:04:34,233 --> 00:04:36,433
As you all know, I recently
came into some money.
125
00:04:36,500 --> 00:04:37,900
Yeah, you won't shut up
about it.
126
00:04:37,966 --> 00:04:39,426
RIP, Mom and Dad.
127
00:04:39,500 --> 00:04:43,200
Well,
today I made a purchase.
128
00:04:43,266 --> 00:04:44,796
We're in play, boys.
129
00:04:44,866 --> 00:04:46,526
We are in play.
130
00:04:46,600 --> 00:04:47,700
What the fuck?
131
00:04:47,766 --> 00:04:49,296
Don't touch it, Chris.
132
00:04:49,366 --> 00:04:50,726
That's a catalyzed
thermonuclear
133
00:04:50,800 --> 00:04:52,270
pulse propulsion device.
134
00:04:52,333 --> 00:04:54,633
Who knows what carnage
it could unleash?
135
00:04:54,700 --> 00:04:55,830
Why did you buy it?
136
00:04:55,900 --> 00:04:57,030
All you guys ever do
in this house
137
00:04:57,100 --> 00:04:58,570
is talk about nuclear war.
138
00:04:58,633 --> 00:05:00,703
‐So.
‐So you're always going on
139
00:05:00,766 --> 00:05:03,166
about, "How long before
World War III starts?"
140
00:05:03,233 --> 00:05:04,603
It's made me a nervous wreck.
141
00:05:04,666 --> 00:05:05,926
So I've done something
about it.
142
00:05:06,000 --> 00:05:07,670
‐ What, buy a nuclear bomb?
143
00:05:07,733 --> 00:05:10,003
You said that nuclear war
is inevitable, Wes.
144
00:05:10,066 --> 00:05:12,896
It is if psychos like you
start buying weapons.
145
00:05:12,966 --> 00:05:14,226
I'm not a psycho.
146
00:05:14,300 --> 00:05:15,730
It's a deterrent.
147
00:05:15,800 --> 00:05:17,030
Who is it deterring?
148
00:05:17,100 --> 00:05:18,900
Whoever we drop it on.
149
00:05:18,966 --> 00:05:20,996
Wait, you‐‐
you actually want to use it?
150
00:05:21,066 --> 00:05:23,396
I'm sick of living in fear.
151
00:05:23,466 --> 00:05:25,126
The anxiety is doing
my head in.
152
00:05:25,200 --> 00:05:27,270
It's time to lance the boil.
153
00:05:27,333 --> 00:05:29,533
‐(scoffs) I'm out of here.
‐You can't leave.
154
00:05:29,600 --> 00:05:30,570
We're sealed in.
155
00:05:30,633 --> 00:05:31,703
What do you mean?
156
00:05:31,766 --> 00:05:33,966
This thing's massively
radioactive, Chris.
157
00:05:34,033 --> 00:05:35,273
It's a safety hazard,
158
00:05:35,333 --> 00:05:37,903
so I welded the doors
and the windows shut.
159
00:05:37,966 --> 00:05:38,966
So how do we get out?
160
00:05:39,033 --> 00:05:40,233
Let me guess.
161
00:05:40,300 --> 00:05:41,800
We climb out the hole
in the roof
162
00:05:41,866 --> 00:05:43,826
that the bomb will make
after we launch it.
163
00:05:43,900 --> 00:05:45,630
Whoo!
164
00:05:45,700 --> 00:05:48,170
(tense music)
165
00:05:48,233 --> 00:05:50,333
Time's up.
Where's your first?
166
00:05:50,400 --> 00:05:54,430
37 1/2 degrees south,
88.1 degrees east.
167
00:05:54,500 --> 00:05:56,070
(keypad clicking)
168
00:05:56,133 --> 00:05:59,333
Why do you want to bomb
the southern Indian Ocean?
169
00:05:59,400 --> 00:06:02,200
Uh, that's meant to be
where MH370 went down,
170
00:06:02,266 --> 00:06:04,196
and I want to give those people
a proper burial.
171
00:06:04,266 --> 00:06:06,426
Oh, you've chosen that
because it's miles
172
00:06:06,500 --> 00:06:08,930
from human civilization,
haven't you, Wes?
173
00:06:09,000 --> 00:06:10,100
I don't want to hurt anyone.
174
00:06:10,166 --> 00:06:11,666
But what about the fish?
175
00:06:11,733 --> 00:06:14,033
You know I care passionately
about our oceans.
176
00:06:14,100 --> 00:06:15,600
Fine, bomb a desert, then.
177
00:06:15,666 --> 00:06:16,766
‐ Aww, poor desert.
178
00:06:16,833 --> 00:06:19,703
Nuclear war is a man‐made
issue, has to be a city.
179
00:06:19,766 --> 00:06:22,466
All right, the city
with the smallest population,
180
00:06:22,533 --> 00:06:23,303
whatever that is.
181
00:06:23,366 --> 00:06:25,096
That's annoying of you, Chris,
182
00:06:25,166 --> 00:06:27,766
but technically
within the rules.
183
00:06:27,833 --> 00:06:29,403
‐Oh, yeah.
‐What?
184
00:06:29,466 --> 00:06:32,266
That's the Vatican City,
population 450.
185
00:06:32,333 --> 00:06:34,333
The Pope goes on the board.
186
00:06:36,100 --> 00:06:37,400
Fucking hell.
187
00:06:37,466 --> 00:06:38,496
My turn.
188
00:06:38,566 --> 00:06:41,466
I vote for Arthur Street
basketball courts.
189
00:06:41,533 --> 00:06:42,903
What have you got against them?
190
00:06:42,966 --> 00:06:44,826
It's the site of all
our worst arguments.
191
00:06:44,900 --> 00:06:46,000
It has to go.
192
00:06:46,066 --> 00:06:47,666
We'd just find somewhere else
to argue.
193
00:06:47,733 --> 00:06:49,803
There won't be anywhere else,
Chris.
194
00:06:49,866 --> 00:06:51,166
‐ Aw, fuck.
195
00:06:51,233 --> 00:06:53,273
Wes, seeing your idea
didn't make it,
196
00:06:53,333 --> 00:06:54,433
you can throw the dart.
197
00:06:54,500 --> 00:06:56,300
‐No way.
‐Well, it's up to you
198
00:06:56,366 --> 00:06:58,166
how much radiation
you want to absorb.
199
00:06:58,233 --> 00:06:59,473
We can just sit here
until you‐‐
200
00:06:59,533 --> 00:07:00,873
Fine,
give me the fucking dart.
201
00:07:00,933 --> 00:07:01,903
Go easy, Wes.
202
00:07:01,966 --> 00:07:03,296
Go easy with a nuclear attack?
203
00:07:03,366 --> 00:07:05,666
‐Look where you're throwing.
‐I'll show you "go easy."
204
00:07:05,733 --> 00:07:08,103
BOTH: Ahh!
205
00:07:08,166 --> 00:07:12,666
(missile whirring)
206
00:07:12,733 --> 00:07:14,973
Aw, shit.
207
00:07:15,033 --> 00:07:18,133
(missile roaring)
208
00:07:24,066 --> 00:07:26,126
Where's it going?
209
00:07:26,200 --> 00:07:28,770
To wherever
the factory preset is, I guess.
210
00:07:28,833 --> 00:07:30,433
Which is where?
211
00:07:30,500 --> 00:07:31,600
Uh...
212
00:07:31,666 --> 00:07:32,596
(keypad clicking)
213
00:07:32,666 --> 00:07:34,466
The Kremlin.
214
00:07:34,533 --> 00:07:36,303
(siren blaring)
215
00:07:36,366 --> 00:07:39,466
(lively music, vocalizing)
216
00:07:39,533 --> 00:07:42,773
♪♪ ♪♪
217
00:07:42,833 --> 00:07:44,873
HUNCHMAN: Believe me, fellas,
I never thought
218
00:07:44,933 --> 00:07:47,073
I'd get into
the mumble rap business.
219
00:07:47,133 --> 00:07:49,103
Oh, really,
you didn't predict this?
220
00:07:49,166 --> 00:07:51,466
To be honest,
retirement was kind of dull,
221
00:07:51,533 --> 00:07:55,003
and, as you both know,
I crave excitement.
222
00:07:55,066 --> 00:07:56,426
That's when Dan Henry
told me about
223
00:07:56,500 --> 00:07:58,430
a young songwriter
who needed help.
224
00:07:58,500 --> 00:08:00,300
Mr. Hunchman, what's up, bruh?
225
00:08:00,366 --> 00:08:02,466
What's crack‐a‐lackin',
Perky?
226
00:08:02,533 --> 00:08:03,333
I'm so into this.
227
00:08:03,400 --> 00:08:04,700
Uh‐huh.
Let's just keep walking.
228
00:08:04,766 --> 00:08:08,366
Now here I am,
producing a rap music video
229
00:08:08,433 --> 00:08:10,573
in an abandoned shopping mall.
230
00:08:10,633 --> 00:08:13,273
Who says there are no second
acts in American lives?
231
00:08:13,333 --> 00:08:14,433
‐Fitzgerald.
‐Batman.
232
00:08:14,500 --> 00:08:16,130
What?
No, F. Scott Fitzgerald.
233
00:08:16,200 --> 00:08:18,270
Well, as Lil Blurp
might say,
234
00:08:18,333 --> 00:08:22,003
Papa Zany, haters
get wetted by my nine.
235
00:08:22,066 --> 00:08:23,066
(hip‐hop music)
236
00:08:23,133 --> 00:08:26,233
Here we are.
Now we need to be quiet.
237
00:08:26,300 --> 00:08:27,900
‐BOTH: Whoa.
‐(mumble rapping)
238
00:08:27,966 --> 00:08:30,196
DAVID: Oh‐em‐God.
239
00:08:30,266 --> 00:08:33,126
Welcome to show biz, fellas.
240
00:08:33,200 --> 00:08:34,230
(mimics blaring airhorn)
241
00:08:34,300 --> 00:08:35,970
♪♪ Nah, just give me paper ♪♪
242
00:08:36,033 --> 00:08:38,003
♪♪ I just want the paper ♪♪
243
00:08:38,066 --> 00:08:39,396
(indistinct rapping)
244
00:08:39,466 --> 00:08:41,196
Oh, my God, Dad.
245
00:08:41,266 --> 00:08:43,696
JOHN: How much money did
you invest in this project?
246
00:08:43,766 --> 00:08:44,926
$200,000.
247
00:08:45,000 --> 00:08:46,570
Oh, no.
248
00:08:46,633 --> 00:08:48,433
And what, I suppose
you want me to try
249
00:08:48,500 --> 00:08:49,930
to get the money back
for you somehow?
250
00:08:50,000 --> 00:08:51,630
No, I made that money back
in a week
251
00:08:51,700 --> 00:08:54,670
once we monetized
Lil Blurp's YouTube channel,
252
00:08:54,733 --> 00:08:56,503
which is amazing,
considering he dropped out of
253
00:08:56,566 --> 00:08:59,126
Smallmouth Poly Prep
just five months ago.
254
00:08:59,200 --> 00:09:00,500
‐I can't hear you‐‐what?
‐He dropped out of
255
00:09:00,566 --> 00:09:03,326
‐Smallmouth Poly Prep‐‐
‐RIZ: Cut!
256
00:09:03,400 --> 00:09:05,570
Who's fucking up
my shoot, yo?
257
00:09:05,633 --> 00:09:08,233
Oh, yeesh, I'm sorry, Riz.
My bad.
258
00:09:08,300 --> 00:09:11,370
Boys, this is
Ryan "Riz" McClorkle.
259
00:09:11,433 --> 00:09:13,273
‐He's our director.
‐I'm on my grind,
260
00:09:13,333 --> 00:09:14,703
tryin' to make
Lil Blurp blow up,
261
00:09:14,766 --> 00:09:16,966
so if you gonna keep talking,
you gotta take it outside
262
00:09:17,033 --> 00:09:18,603
or just shut the fuck up.
263
00:09:18,666 --> 00:09:20,066
Hey, that's‐‐that's my dad.
264
00:09:20,133 --> 00:09:22,673
Yo, Riz.
Hold these.
265
00:09:22,733 --> 00:09:26,273
No one disrespects Mr. Hunchman
like that, you hear me?
266
00:09:26,333 --> 00:09:28,403
‐Yeah.
‐He's the bank.
267
00:09:28,466 --> 00:09:30,466
‐Okay.
‐He pays you!
268
00:09:30,533 --> 00:09:32,933
‐Yeah.
‐So just on the professional,
269
00:09:33,000 --> 00:09:35,100
‐you let him by.
‐Sorry, Blurp.
270
00:09:35,166 --> 00:09:36,466
But more than that,
271
00:09:36,533 --> 00:09:38,373
he's that white dad
I never had.
272
00:09:38,433 --> 00:09:40,233
Straight up father figure.
273
00:09:40,300 --> 00:09:42,030
Shout‐out to Mr. Hunchman!
274
00:09:42,100 --> 00:09:44,400
(laughs)
It's all love.
275
00:09:44,466 --> 00:09:47,596
Aw, you sounded magnificent
up there, Blurp.
276
00:09:47,666 --> 00:09:49,426
‐Mm, did he?
‐Yo!
277
00:09:49,500 --> 00:09:52,230
Inspector John,
the lonely detective!
278
00:09:52,300 --> 00:09:54,830
‐You gonna help us?
‐Uh, actually I don't know
279
00:09:54,900 --> 00:09:56,030
why I'm here, Dad.
280
00:09:56,100 --> 00:09:57,930
This is why I called you, bud.
281
00:09:58,000 --> 00:09:59,970
There's been
an incident on set.
282
00:10:00,033 --> 00:10:01,803
Do y'all fuck with Lil Dronk?
283
00:10:01,866 --> 00:10:04,096
I don't think we do.
David?
284
00:10:04,166 --> 00:10:05,566
‐Not to my knowledge.
‐Hmm.
285
00:10:05,633 --> 00:10:08,333
LIL BLURP: He a rainbow
dreadlock no‐talent bitch.
286
00:10:08,400 --> 00:10:11,170
We see Little Dronk
as a competitor
287
00:10:11,233 --> 00:10:12,973
in the mumble rap sector.
288
00:10:13,033 --> 00:10:15,233
LIL BLURP: Lil Dronk
shot a video with a lion.
289
00:10:15,300 --> 00:10:18,130
He walkin' around
with a damn lion.
290
00:10:18,200 --> 00:10:20,670
‐Uh‐huh.
‐So I gotta up the game
291
00:10:20,733 --> 00:10:22,003
‐for my video.
‐Oh.
292
00:10:22,066 --> 00:10:23,596
So guess what I got.
293
00:10:23,666 --> 00:10:26,026
Ten omelets!
294
00:10:26,100 --> 00:10:27,870
I'm sorry.
Omelets?
295
00:10:27,933 --> 00:10:29,203
Blurp, we've been over this.
296
00:10:29,266 --> 00:10:31,096
They're called ocelots.
297
00:10:31,166 --> 00:10:32,866
(gasps)
You have ten ocelots here?
298
00:10:32,933 --> 00:10:36,633
LIL BLURP: Yeah!
Ocelots be like mini tigers.
299
00:10:36,700 --> 00:10:38,930
We got 'em from
some animal rescue.
300
00:10:39,000 --> 00:10:40,570
Rhode Island or some shit?
301
00:10:40,633 --> 00:10:42,973
It was right over the border
in South Carolina.
302
00:10:43,033 --> 00:10:45,503
Right, I thought
that was Rhode Island,
303
00:10:45,566 --> 00:10:48,796
but it was
South Carolina.
304
00:10:48,866 --> 00:10:50,996
HUNCHMAN: Marinello Sisters
Big Cat Rescue.
305
00:10:51,066 --> 00:10:53,466
People get them as pets,
but they too wild,
306
00:10:53,533 --> 00:10:56,103
so they abandon them.
It's sad.
307
00:10:56,166 --> 00:10:57,396
It is sad, Blurp.
308
00:10:57,466 --> 00:10:59,666
You two really get along,
don't you?
309
00:10:59,733 --> 00:11:03,503
So it's finna be your boy,
space hallway stuntin'
310
00:11:03,566 --> 00:11:06,696
with ten little homies
like we at Harris Teeter,
311
00:11:06,766 --> 00:11:09,396
also Tokyo Drift, sheezer.
312
00:11:09,466 --> 00:11:13,396
But this morning?
They boosted, nah mean?
313
00:11:13,466 --> 00:11:14,366
(laughs)
No.
314
00:11:14,433 --> 00:11:15,703
All right,
let me figure this out.
315
00:11:15,766 --> 00:11:19,226
You rented ten ocelots
to put in a shopping cart.
316
00:11:19,300 --> 00:11:20,130
That's the Harris Teeter
reference.
317
00:11:20,200 --> 00:11:21,300
(bell dings)
318
00:11:21,366 --> 00:11:22,496
And push across
that sky bridge‐‐
319
00:11:22,566 --> 00:11:23,966
‐space hallway‐‐
‐(bell chimes)
320
00:11:24,033 --> 00:11:25,273
in slow motion‐‐
"Tokyo Drift."
321
00:11:25,333 --> 00:11:27,703
‐(bell chimes)
‐But they've been stolen.
322
00:11:27,766 --> 00:11:29,696
‐And you want us to find them.
‐(bell chimes rapidly)
323
00:11:29,766 --> 00:11:34,266
Oh, ho, ho, you a don,
Detective John!
324
00:11:34,333 --> 00:11:36,333
‐Does that rhyme?
‐Putting that together was
325
00:11:36,400 --> 00:11:38,430
honestly the best detective
work I've ever done in my life.
326
00:11:38,500 --> 00:11:40,230
Can you help us, son?
Please.
327
00:11:40,300 --> 00:11:43,100
This video is a crucial step
for Little Blurp.
328
00:11:43,166 --> 00:11:45,026
(sighs)
Fine, Dad.
329
00:11:45,100 --> 00:11:47,170
Take us to the scene
of the crime.
330
00:11:47,233 --> 00:11:50,303
(lively instrumental music)
331
00:11:53,333 --> 00:11:55,633
(lively instrumental music)
332
00:11:55,700 --> 00:11:58,600
(funky electronic music)
333
00:11:58,666 --> 00:12:05,466
♪♪ ♪♪
334
00:12:41,666 --> 00:12:43,196
(video camera whirring)
335
00:12:45,266 --> 00:12:47,266
‐GLENN: How's it going?
‐TOM: Hey, how are you?
336
00:12:47,333 --> 00:12:49,803
It's nice to meet you.
337
00:12:49,866 --> 00:12:52,626
GLENN: Actually,
we've met before.
338
00:12:52,700 --> 00:12:54,130
‐Yes, of course we have.
‐GLENN: Yeah.
339
00:12:54,200 --> 00:12:55,170
Um, the, uh‐‐
340
00:12:55,233 --> 00:12:56,833
GLENN: We did a play together.
341
00:12:56,900 --> 00:12:58,070
Remember?
342
00:12:58,133 --> 00:12:59,703
‐The, um‐‐
‐GLENN: Cabin of Fog.
343
00:12:59,766 --> 00:13:02,096
Yes, shit.
344
00:13:02,166 --> 00:13:04,196
God, Glenn, right?
Is it Glenn?
345
00:13:04,266 --> 00:13:05,326
‐GLENN: Yeah.
‐Wow.
346
00:13:05,400 --> 00:13:06,300
It's good to see you.
You don't‐‐
347
00:13:06,366 --> 00:13:08,396
You're not acting anymore then?
348
00:13:08,466 --> 00:13:11,196
GLENN: Nope.
349
00:13:11,266 --> 00:13:13,466
I didn't want to act anymore.
350
00:13:13,533 --> 00:13:15,103
That's great.
351
00:13:15,166 --> 00:13:17,066
I mean, you're probably
better off now, right?
352
00:13:19,533 --> 00:13:22,633
GLENN: So why don't we just
start with scene one.
353
00:13:22,700 --> 00:13:25,130
‐All right.
‐GLENN: And just so you know,
354
00:13:25,200 --> 00:13:27,330
this role might be
a little against type for you.
355
00:13:27,400 --> 00:13:28,370
Mm‐hmm.
356
00:13:28,433 --> 00:13:30,333
GLENN: They're looking
for masculine.
357
00:13:30,400 --> 00:13:31,400
Sorry?
358
00:13:31,466 --> 00:13:32,366
GLENN: Action.
359
00:13:32,433 --> 00:13:34,103
So here's where you've
been hiding.
360
00:13:34,166 --> 00:13:36,466
Yeah.
Yeah, I just, um...
361
00:13:36,533 --> 00:13:38,773
(sniffs) I just needed
some air, I guess.
362
00:13:38,833 --> 00:13:40,733
You know, you shouldn't let
your boyfriend
363
00:13:40,800 --> 00:13:41,930
‐talk to you like‐‐
‐GLENN: All right, Tom,
364
00:13:42,000 --> 00:13:43,370
‐I'm just gonna stop you.
‐Yeah.
365
00:13:43,433 --> 00:13:46,173
GLENN: So just so we're clear,
it's not a kids' movie,
366
00:13:46,233 --> 00:13:48,833
so you can't act as big
as you usually do.
367
00:13:48,900 --> 00:13:50,430
You're not gonna get it
368
00:13:50,500 --> 00:13:54,300
'cause you're good‐looking,
you know?
369
00:13:54,366 --> 00:13:55,426
Okay.
370
00:13:55,500 --> 00:13:58,170
GLENN: So here's where
you've been hiding.
371
00:13:58,233 --> 00:14:01,303
Yeah, I just, um,
I needed some air, I guess.
372
00:14:01,366 --> 00:14:03,426
GLENN: (chuckling)
Tom, I'm sorry.
373
00:14:03,500 --> 00:14:04,900
‐What?
‐GLENN: I don't want to keep
374
00:14:04,966 --> 00:14:06,926
cutting you off, but I just
want you to get the best look.
375
00:14:07,000 --> 00:14:08,030
‐You know what I mean?
‐Yeah, no.
376
00:14:08,100 --> 00:14:09,770
GLENN: Here, let me show you.
377
00:14:09,833 --> 00:14:11,133
‐What?
‐Give me the line.
378
00:14:11,200 --> 00:14:12,200
Give you what line?
379
00:14:12,266 --> 00:14:14,196
So here's where you've
been hiding.
380
00:14:14,266 --> 00:14:15,466
Yeah, I came out here
for some air.
381
00:14:15,533 --> 00:14:19,373
You know,
you shouldn't let...
382
00:14:19,433 --> 00:14:22,073
you boyfriend talk to you
like that.
383
00:14:22,133 --> 00:14:23,333
Do you see that?
384
00:14:23,400 --> 00:14:25,300
You see how I took a pause
like an actor,
385
00:14:25,366 --> 00:14:26,766
'cause I'm trying
to have empathy?
386
00:14:26,833 --> 00:14:28,903
Did you see the level?
387
00:14:28,966 --> 00:14:30,166
That was nice, right?
Try that.
388
00:14:30,233 --> 00:14:31,333
‐That that this time.
‐Oh, fucking...
389
00:14:31,400 --> 00:14:32,870
Sorry,
what the fuck is your problem?
390
00:14:32,933 --> 00:14:34,673
GLENN: You rushed
your goddamn entrance
391
00:14:34,733 --> 00:14:36,673
in A Cabin of Fog,
and you ruined my performance.
392
00:14:36,733 --> 00:14:38,603
‐Oh, my fucking God.
‐You ruined it.
393
00:14:38,666 --> 00:14:39,866
‐Yes!
‐Are you fucking kidding me?
394
00:14:39,933 --> 00:14:41,303
You had five lines.
395
00:14:41,366 --> 00:14:42,926
I'm not kidding you.
You ruined my five lines.
396
00:14:43,000 --> 00:14:45,070
‐You had five lines.
‐Use‐‐use that.
397
00:14:45,133 --> 00:14:46,303
‐What?
‐Go with that.
398
00:14:46,366 --> 00:14:47,496
What? Oh, fuck's sake.
399
00:14:47,566 --> 00:14:49,366
GLENN: So here's where you've
been hiding.
400
00:14:49,433 --> 00:14:51,573
Yeah, I just‐‐
I needed some air, I guess.
401
00:14:51,633 --> 00:14:52,633
You know, you shouldn't let
you boyfriend talk‐‐
402
00:14:52,700 --> 00:14:54,270
GLENN: All right,
I think we got it, Tom.
403
00:14:54,333 --> 00:14:55,533
‐Yeah, fuck you, Glenn.
‐GLENN: Thanks for coming in.
404
00:14:55,600 --> 00:14:57,700
‐Go fuck yourself.
‐GLENN: Fuck yourself as well.
405
00:14:57,766 --> 00:14:59,426
(video camera beeps)
406
00:14:59,500 --> 00:15:02,570
(dreamy electronic music)
407
00:15:02,633 --> 00:15:05,673
♪♪ ♪♪
408
00:15:05,733 --> 00:15:08,703
(siren blaring)
409
00:15:08,766 --> 00:15:11,696
(eerie music)
410
00:15:11,766 --> 00:15:15,726
♪♪ ♪♪
411
00:15:15,800 --> 00:15:20,330
Guys, over here.
412
00:15:20,400 --> 00:15:22,070
(slurping)
413
00:15:22,133 --> 00:15:23,273
How is it?
414
00:15:23,333 --> 00:15:26,803
I'm too thirsty to care.
415
00:15:26,866 --> 00:15:28,926
(inhales)
416
00:15:29,000 --> 00:15:31,700
(exhales)
417
00:15:31,766 --> 00:15:33,696
So this is the apocalypse, eh?
418
00:15:33,766 --> 00:15:35,326
Pretty manageable.
419
00:15:35,400 --> 00:15:37,070
The reality is never as bad,
is it?
420
00:15:37,133 --> 00:15:40,173
It's the not knowing
that causes the anxiety.
421
00:15:40,233 --> 00:15:42,633
The world is destroying itself,
Greg.
422
00:15:42,700 --> 00:15:46,200
True, but on the plus side,
my stress is gone.
423
00:15:46,266 --> 00:15:49,066
I'm more relaxed than I've been
for years.
424
00:15:49,133 --> 00:15:52,303
Greg,
if you were that stressed,
425
00:15:52,366 --> 00:15:56,196
why didn't you take a week off
and go to the beach?
426
00:15:56,266 --> 00:15:58,426
That's a good point.
427
00:15:58,500 --> 00:15:59,830
Yeah.
428
00:15:59,900 --> 00:16:01,870
Yeah.
429
00:16:01,933 --> 00:16:05,073
(gagging)
430
00:16:08,033 --> 00:16:09,273
Yeah.
431
00:16:09,333 --> 00:16:11,903
(harsh electronic music)
432
00:16:11,966 --> 00:16:13,126
(loud crash)
433
00:16:13,200 --> 00:16:16,470
(light electronic music)
434
00:16:19,633 --> 00:16:21,203
(electronic music)
435
00:16:21,266 --> 00:16:22,626
(video camera whirring)
436
00:16:23,600 --> 00:16:25,200
MAN: Okay, so we'll just need
to get a slate
437
00:16:25,266 --> 00:16:26,626
before we begin.
438
00:16:26,700 --> 00:16:29,100
Okay,
so this is Tucker Barkelson
439
00:16:29,166 --> 00:16:31,596
reading for Rusty the army dog.
440
00:16:31,666 --> 00:16:34,126
And action.
441
00:16:34,200 --> 00:16:35,870
Rusty, is that you?
442
00:16:35,933 --> 00:16:36,933
(dog barks)
443
00:16:37,000 --> 00:16:38,600
You saved my life, boy.
444
00:16:38,666 --> 00:16:41,826
‐MAN: Are you okay?
‐WOMAN: Foot. Down.
445
00:16:41,900 --> 00:16:43,070
MAN: Oh, no. They got you.
446
00:16:43,133 --> 00:16:45,503
They shot you, boy.
447
00:16:45,566 --> 00:16:47,766
Okay, and this is where
we need him to completely die.
448
00:16:47,833 --> 00:16:49,733
WOMAN: On your side.
449
00:16:52,100 --> 00:16:54,600
MAN: Okay,
you see how his tail's wagging?
450
00:16:54,666 --> 00:16:56,526
Can he not be happy
when he's dying?
451
00:16:56,600 --> 00:16:58,200
And action.
452
00:16:58,266 --> 00:16:59,766
(imitating gunfire)
453
00:16:59,833 --> 00:17:01,073
Boom, boom.
454
00:17:01,133 --> 00:17:03,003
Oh, boy, they shot you.
455
00:17:03,066 --> 00:17:05,526
He really has to stop
wagging his tail.
456
00:17:05,600 --> 00:17:06,530
Action.
457
00:17:06,600 --> 00:17:07,670
(dog barking)
458
00:17:07,733 --> 00:17:11,073
Okay, actors,
please wait your turn, okay?
459
00:17:11,133 --> 00:17:12,373
Let's have some silence
in here
460
00:17:12,433 --> 00:17:14,133
in respect for the auditions.
461
00:17:14,200 --> 00:17:18,130
Can he crawl into it,
like, military‐style?
462
00:17:18,200 --> 00:17:19,870
WOMAN: Down, crawl.
463
00:17:19,933 --> 00:17:21,833
Down, crawl.
464
00:17:21,900 --> 00:17:23,170
Stay.
465
00:17:23,233 --> 00:17:24,473
MAN: Okay,
he's wagging his tail again.
466
00:17:26,000 --> 00:17:27,930
Is he mocking me?
467
00:17:28,000 --> 00:17:29,600
Do you have another dog?
468
00:17:31,600 --> 00:17:32,570
I'm gonna be honest.
469
00:17:32,633 --> 00:17:33,703
I don't think anyone's
gonna give a fuck
470
00:17:33,766 --> 00:17:35,396
that this dog's dying.
471
00:17:35,466 --> 00:17:38,066
And they're fishing out
the bullet.
472
00:17:38,133 --> 00:17:41,633
He looks hopeful for a moment.
473
00:17:41,700 --> 00:17:43,670
Then things take a turn
for the worse.
474
00:17:43,733 --> 00:17:46,733
He's still dying.
475
00:17:46,800 --> 00:17:50,330
He's going, going...
476
00:17:52,633 --> 00:17:55,203
And dead.
477
00:17:55,266 --> 00:17:56,926
Okay, yeah,
this dog looks dead.
478
00:17:57,000 --> 00:17:59,800
This should work.
479
00:17:59,866 --> 00:18:01,196
Can we trim his ears?
480
00:18:01,266 --> 00:18:02,426
(camera shuts down)
481
00:18:02,500 --> 00:18:07,070
(pulsing electronic music)
482
00:18:07,133 --> 00:18:08,303
DAVID: Okay,
here's what we know.
483
00:18:08,366 --> 00:18:10,566
At 7:00 a. m., the ocelots
were locked up
484
00:18:10,633 --> 00:18:12,533
under the care of
Daisy Marinello
485
00:18:12,600 --> 00:18:14,530
of Marinello Sisters
Animal Rescue.
486
00:18:14,600 --> 00:18:17,030
After a crew breakfast
that was around 8:15,
487
00:18:17,100 --> 00:18:19,500
Daisy says she feels "sleepy."
488
00:18:19,566 --> 00:18:20,696
She disappears,
489
00:18:20,766 --> 00:18:23,926
and next thing you know,
all the ocelots are gone.
490
00:18:24,000 --> 00:18:25,900
Oh, my God,
this is terrible.
491
00:18:25,966 --> 00:18:27,796
I mean, it's really shameful.
492
00:18:27,866 --> 00:18:29,196
It's not that bad.
It's just ocelots.
493
00:18:29,266 --> 00:18:31,566
No, no, this, I'm watching
this Lil Dronk video.
494
00:18:31,633 --> 00:18:32,673
DAVID: Oh.
495
00:18:32,733 --> 00:18:34,133
JOHN: I mean,
it's an insult to rap music.
496
00:18:34,200 --> 00:18:35,370
What happened to lyrics?
497
00:18:35,433 --> 00:18:36,803
‐To craftsmanship?
‐Yeah, I know.
498
00:18:36,866 --> 00:18:39,526
I know, nobody under the age
of 30 can rap for shit.
499
00:18:39,600 --> 00:18:41,930
‐Come at me, teenagers.
‐JOHN: I just don't get it.
500
00:18:42,000 --> 00:18:43,270
I know that after my mom died,
501
00:18:43,333 --> 00:18:44,773
Dad and I didn't
have much in common,
502
00:18:44,833 --> 00:18:48,533
but I didn't expect him to
replace me with a secret son,
503
00:18:48,600 --> 00:18:49,730
especially not one
with the words
504
00:18:49,800 --> 00:18:52,270
"fuck life, eat pie"
tattooed on his tongue.
505
00:18:52,333 --> 00:18:54,003
I understand.
It's heavy and it's weird,
506
00:18:54,066 --> 00:18:55,396
but look on
the bright side.
507
00:18:55,466 --> 00:18:58,566
A rapper is paying us money
to hunt ocelots
508
00:18:58,633 --> 00:19:01,033
in the very same mall
where I once got busted
509
00:19:01,100 --> 00:19:03,700
for shoplifting
KRS‐One cassettes.
510
00:19:04,533 --> 00:19:06,673
You know what?
That was a good pep talk.
511
00:19:06,733 --> 00:19:08,303
‐Yeah, I know.
‐Okay, let's do this.
512
00:19:08,366 --> 00:19:10,466
Ocelots‐‐highly solitary,
natural climbers...
513
00:19:10,533 --> 00:19:13,903
If my guess is right‐‐
and it is‐‐they went up
514
00:19:13,966 --> 00:19:15,466
that open air duct shaft
and split up.
515
00:19:15,533 --> 00:19:17,673
DAVID: (laughs)
Are we going up in an air duct?
516
00:19:17,733 --> 00:19:18,903
‐Yes.
‐Hell yes.
517
00:19:18,966 --> 00:19:21,026
Ocelot hunting montage?
518
00:19:21,100 --> 00:19:22,570
Bring that beat back!
519
00:19:22,633 --> 00:19:25,203
(funky music)
520
00:19:25,266 --> 00:19:31,666
♪♪ ♪♪
521
00:19:53,166 --> 00:19:56,966
LIL BLURP: Yo, that's amazing!
522
00:19:57,033 --> 00:19:59,303
But I only count
nine omelets.
523
00:19:59,366 --> 00:20:01,866
Well, that's why I
brought you here, Lil Blurp.
524
00:20:01,933 --> 00:20:06,073
Because, unlike most cats,
ocelots are gifted swimmers.
525
00:20:06,133 --> 00:20:08,603
Thank you for
finding my babies!
526
00:20:08,666 --> 00:20:10,966
I still don't know
why I passed out.
527
00:20:11,033 --> 00:20:12,903
Well, let me guess, Daisy.
528
00:20:12,966 --> 00:20:16,026
Was your breakfast smoothie
strangely sweet this morning?
529
00:20:16,100 --> 00:20:18,430
Yes!
How did you know?
530
00:20:18,500 --> 00:20:21,270
I didn't just come here to
stuff pillowcases with ocelots.
531
00:20:21,333 --> 00:20:23,203
I came here to solve a mystery.
532
00:20:23,266 --> 00:20:24,896
Someone wanted you
out of the way
533
00:20:24,966 --> 00:20:26,366
and those ocelots gone,
534
00:20:26,433 --> 00:20:28,733
because someone wanted
this video to fail.
535
00:20:28,800 --> 00:20:30,430
Oh, for Pete's sake!
536
00:20:30,500 --> 00:20:34,230
Lil Blurp, before David and I
went on our "lil safari,"
537
00:20:34,300 --> 00:20:35,830
I did some research
into the work
538
00:20:35,900 --> 00:20:37,270
of your rival,
Lil Dronk.
539
00:20:37,333 --> 00:20:38,933
Do you happen to know
who directed
540
00:20:39,000 --> 00:20:40,630
that video of him
with the lion?
541
00:20:40,700 --> 00:20:43,230
I do not happen to know.
542
00:20:43,300 --> 00:20:45,600
Well, I checked the credits.
It's Riz.
543
00:20:45,666 --> 00:20:48,826
‐He's also Lil Dronk's manager.
‐(all gasping)
544
00:20:48,900 --> 00:20:51,030
What?
Riz works for Lil Dronk?
545
00:20:51,100 --> 00:20:52,970
JOHN: And, Daisy,
your breakfast smoothie
546
00:20:53,033 --> 00:20:54,503
was actually Lean,
547
00:20:54,566 --> 00:20:57,826
a potent mix of codeine,
promethazine, and candy.
548
00:20:57,900 --> 00:20:59,430
What?
549
00:20:59,500 --> 00:21:01,570
You said it was
flaxseed and kale!
550
00:21:01,633 --> 00:21:04,333
Riz drugged you,
so he could release the ocelots
551
00:21:04,400 --> 00:21:05,900
and sabotage the video.
552
00:21:05,966 --> 00:21:08,426
Yo, Riz,
what's your problem?
553
00:21:08,500 --> 00:21:10,970
My problem is you should've
hired me as your manager,
554
00:21:11,033 --> 00:21:13,603
not this old‐ass,
khaki‐wearing motherfucker.
555
00:21:13,666 --> 00:21:15,026
Hey, watch it, sir.
556
00:21:15,100 --> 00:21:17,500
At least Mr. Hunchman
act his age.
557
00:21:17,566 --> 00:21:19,296
You 35 years old!
558
00:21:19,366 --> 00:21:21,266
Wear a necktie, damn.
559
00:21:21,333 --> 00:21:22,633
You tell him, son.
560
00:21:22,700 --> 00:21:24,130
I‐I mean, Blurp.
561
00:21:24,200 --> 00:21:26,000
Fuck all y'all.
I'm out.
562
00:21:26,066 --> 00:21:27,726
RIZ: Peace!
563
00:21:27,800 --> 00:21:29,470
Deploy the ocelots.
564
00:21:29,533 --> 00:21:32,773
‐Go, go, go, my babies!
‐(ocelots snarling)
565
00:21:32,833 --> 00:21:34,233
‐Feast!
‐RIZ: Ah, oh!
566
00:21:34,300 --> 00:21:38,330
Ooh, that is not gonna end well
for Rizzy Fannypack Face.
567
00:21:38,400 --> 00:21:40,130
‐Mm, they are bloodthirsty.
‐(ocelots growling)
568
00:21:40,200 --> 00:21:42,900
Mr. H, will you direct
the rest of the video?
569
00:21:42,966 --> 00:21:45,166
(gasps)
Yes...
570
00:21:45,233 --> 00:21:47,133
if you do it my way.
571
00:21:47,200 --> 00:21:48,100
LIL BLURP: ♪♪ Hey, Papa Zany ♪♪
572
00:21:48,166 --> 00:21:50,496
DAVID: I gotta say, Mr. H,
573
00:21:50,566 --> 00:21:53,026
‐this is an epic shot.
‐Thanks, David.
574
00:21:53,100 --> 00:21:55,370
I was always a fan of
Busby Berkeley.
575
00:21:55,433 --> 00:21:58,033
Say, Dad, I think
I solved another mystery today.
576
00:21:58,100 --> 00:21:59,370
What's that, son?
577
00:21:59,433 --> 00:22:00,733
No, no, turn around.
Look at the monitor.
578
00:22:00,800 --> 00:22:02,330
This is‐‐
this is going to be emotional.
579
00:22:02,400 --> 00:22:04,470
‐Okay.
‐I get it.
580
00:22:04,533 --> 00:22:06,533
You see Lil Blurp as a son
because he needs you,
581
00:22:06,600 --> 00:22:08,370
and, even though
you're my dad
582
00:22:08,433 --> 00:22:10,703
and I love you,
technically,
583
00:22:10,766 --> 00:22:12,596
I never really needed you.
584
00:22:12,666 --> 00:22:14,666
HUNCHMAN: The young man
has tattoos on his face
585
00:22:14,733 --> 00:22:17,073
and drinks God‐knows‐what
to avoid reality.
586
00:22:17,133 --> 00:22:18,973
I just want him to be okay.
587
00:22:19,033 --> 00:22:20,733
I hope that doesn't hurt you.
588
00:22:20,800 --> 00:22:24,300
No, it's...fine, actually,
now that I understand.
589
00:22:24,366 --> 00:22:26,526
MEG: Excuse me,
Mr. Hunchman?
590
00:22:26,600 --> 00:22:27,570
My name's Meg.
591
00:22:27,633 --> 00:22:29,473
‐Could I get a selfie with you?
‐Sure.
592
00:22:29,533 --> 00:22:31,573
(quietly)
What's a "selfie"?
593
00:22:31,633 --> 00:22:33,473
(vaudeville music)
594
00:22:34,833 --> 00:22:37,773
(lively electronic music)
595
00:22:37,833 --> 00:22:44,633
♪♪ ♪♪
596
00:23:24,433 --> 00:23:27,403
‐(clear music)
‐CHORUS: ♪♪ Yes ♪♪