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[ Billie Eilish's
"Therefore I Am" playing ]

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♪♪♪♪♪♪

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<i>♪♪ I'm not your friend</i>
<i>or anything, damn ♪♪</i>

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<i>♪♪ You think</i>
<i>that you're the man ♪♪</i>

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<i>♪♪ I think, therefore I am ♪♪</i>

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<i>♪♪ I'm not your friend</i>
<i>or anything, damn ♪♪</i>

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<i>♪♪ You think</i>
<i>that you're the man ♪♪</i>

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<i>♪♪ I think, therefore I am ♪♪</i>

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It's very hard for a woman
who has been brought up to be

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sweet and clingy to stand up
in front of 2,500 people

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and say,
"Okay, now listen to me."

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You have really
a tremendous sense of power

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when you're standing up
and commanding them

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to listen to you.

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You must be a very strong woman.

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♪♪♪♪♪♪

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Women have always been
in comedy.

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<i>♪♪ Stop, what the hell</i>
<i>are you talking about? ♪♪</i>

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But now we're at such
a critical mass

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that we can't ignore
that women are hilarious

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and making content that
everybody wants to consume.

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<i>♪♪ Don't talk ♪♪</i>

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<i>♪♪'Bout me like how you might</i>
<i>know how I feel ♪♪</i>

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<i>♪♪ Top of the world,</i>
<i>but your world isn't real ♪♪</i>

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It's not about talking like men
or talking about the stuff

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that they talk about.

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It's about our experience,
and that is as valid as theirs.

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Women have an advantage
in stand‐up comedy.

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It's 'cause we've been dabbling
in our feelings

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for far longer than men have,

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and so that's why we're killing
the game right now.

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<i>♪♪ I'm not your friend</i>
<i>or anything, damn ♪♪</i>

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<i>♪♪ You think</i>
<i>that you're the man ♪♪</i>

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<i>♪♪ I think, therefore I am ♪♪</i>

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<i>♪♪ I'm not your friend</i>
<i>or anything, damn ♪♪</i>

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00:01:38,909 --> 00:01:41,180
<i>♪♪ You think</i>
<i>that you're the man ♪♪</i>

37
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<i>♪♪ I think, therefore I am ♪♪</i>

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[ electricity buzzing ]

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[ horns honking ]

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[ siren wailing in distance ]

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[ horns continue honking]

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Did I tell you the one time
I was in the bathroom there?

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And I'd just gotten offstage
and I had, like,

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not a great set
'cause it was trying new stuff.

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And, um, this girl walked in
with her friend.

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She goes, "I love the girl
that's on now,

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but that last girl‐‐"
and I just go,

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"Please don't finish
the sentence!

49
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"Please don't
finish the sentence!

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I'm the girl! I'm the girl!"

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And the girl goes‐‐she stopped,
and she's like,

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"Oh, my God. I'm so sorry,"
which made me realize

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that she was gonna say
something bad.

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But, um, she was like,
"I'm so sorry,"

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and I go, "It's okay.
Just don't‐‐We‐‐We‐‐We are‐‐"

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I go, "We walk amongst you."

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♪♪♪♪♪♪

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‐ How have you been?
‐ Good. How are you?

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Wonderful. Good to see you.

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‐ This is my girlfriend, Elysa.
‐ How you doing tonight, Elysa?

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♪♪♪♪♪♪

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Almost every famous comic
started here.

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Where should we go? Do you wanna
go back to the table?

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[ indistinct conversations ]

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This is
the infamous Comics Table.

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We'd all eat dinner together
and, you know, tell jokes

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and bust with each other.

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I always hook up my phone

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and, like, take him
through my funniest friends.

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‐ You're on there all the time.
‐ That's awesome.

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‐ You'll get there. And, um‐‐
‐ [ laughter ]

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‐ Keep submitting.
‐ What I strive for.

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There's also a ton
of camaraderie here.

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The Stand is like that
in New York,

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and Comedy Store in L. A.
and The Improv.

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Like, every‐‐there's certain
clubs where people

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really become family and close
and hang out.

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How are you? Good to see you.
Good.

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On the road and in a lot
of other clubs,

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it's very hard for women
to get stage time.

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So this is where you end up

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after you get
all that stage time

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and you can prove yourself.

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Oh, here's Nikki's.
I don't have my glasses on.

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"This is my favorite place.
Thank you."

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Oh, and Marina.

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Here's Lisa Lampanelli.

88
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Here's Carmen.

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[ cheers and applause ]

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The very first time I performed
onstage was for two minutes,

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and right then, I felt like
I just got married

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and had a baby. Like, I'm like,
this is what I wanna do.

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I never felt that way
about anything.

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What does that even mean,
"awkwardly hot"?

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I've never even heard those
two words put together.

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How do you even say "thank you"
to "awkwardly hot"?

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‐ [ laughter ]
‐ Like, thanks.

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[ laughter ]

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I love stand‐up.

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The joy I get
from getting onstage

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and being able to take people
on a journey

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to a place where they forget
what they're going through.

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And I'll bet you,
you get up at 23,

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and you just, "Mm! Ah! Ah! Ah!"

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I can't do that 'cause that
last egg just fell when I...

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[ laughter ]

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It's mostly people's
biggest fear

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to get up in front of others
and try to make them laugh.

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I told my mother when I was 14
I wanted to be a comedian,

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and she said...
[ imitating Korean accent ]

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"Oh, maybe it's better
if you just die."

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[ laughter ]

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But for me,
when I was starting out,

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I was very different,
very young,

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and so I had to also
convince people

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that I had something important
to say.

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[ cheers and applause ]

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They always show me
doing stand‐up,

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and then the camera goes out
in the audience

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and looks for the Asians
in the audience.

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[ laughter ]

122
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"Look at them
in their natural habitat."

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[ laughter ]

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Genetics didn't work out
for me,

125
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so that's why I am a comic.

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I figured my options were
comedian, softball coach,

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or UPS driver.
‐ [ laughter ]

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The beauty of comedy is that
I have a voice and a microphone,

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and I can just go out there
and do my thing.

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I picked comedy 'cause
I don't look good in brown.

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[ laughter ]

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You have the mic.
It's‐‐It's‐‐It's your turn.

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I was the weird kid.
I was just, like, awkward.

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You know, like, one of my
breasts grew before the other.

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I had, like, a starter tit,

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which is not a hot look
for a girl.

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I have control,
and I'm a storyteller,

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so I get to tell my tale.

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I was like, really? Okay.
And then he goes...

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[ deep voice ] "Little boys
think that tits matter,

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but adult men know that
ass matters. That's all."

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[ laughter ]

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I'm like, "But you're 14."

144
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[ laughter ]

145
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Crafting a joke

146
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and feeling that energy
where knowing in your gut,

147
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I just delivered this high,

148
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and now I have to say
something deeper,

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or I said this fast,
and I said this part slower.

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It'll be funnier.
It's melodic, almost.

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Girls have a more insidious
kind of crazy.

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Sometimes we'll start a fight
with you

153
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just to see if we can make it
look like you started the fight.

154
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[ laughter ]

155
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Every girl's done that,

156
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just to see how strong
your powers are.

157
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It's almost like singing,
like you can just riff

158
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and knowing energy‐wise
that you can take them anywhere.

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"Stop it.
I don't wanna fight with you."

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But in your girl head,
you're like...

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[ deep, hearty guffawing ]

162
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[ deep voice ]
I wanna fight with you.

163
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[ laughter ]

164
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The best experience onstage

165
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is when the whole room
is with you,

166
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and you feel like
you're truly sharing a story

167
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that they can connect with.

168
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"Strong Black woman"‐‐that never
felt like a compliment.

169
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That always felt like work.

170
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‐ [ laughter ]
‐ So it was like,

171
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"Hey, what you doing
on Saturday?

172
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I got this heavy couch.
I need a strong Black woman."

173
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[ laughter ]

174
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I used to be like, ugh,
when comedians would, like,

175
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pat themselves on the back
or like,

176
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"We are the last bastion
of free speech,"

177
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and it's like,
no, we kind of are.

178
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Naked pictures‐‐I send those,
and I shouldn't.

179
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I shouldn't.
The cloud is not secure.

180
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But, like, neither am I,
and I need constant validation.

181
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When someone tells me
I can't talk about something,

182
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I just, like, wanna do it more.

183
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I love "The Sixth Sense,"
though.

184
00:07:44,406 --> 00:07:46,678
I love‐‐and the ending,
when the guy came in my eye,

185
00:07:46,744 --> 00:07:48,648
and I didn't have to watch
the rest of it, that was great.

186
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[ laughter ]

187
00:07:51,988 --> 00:07:56,764
In stand‐up, there is no one
telling us what to do.

188
00:08:05,314 --> 00:08:08,588
[ faint laughter ]

189
00:08:09,155 --> 00:08:12,563
What is it that beats inside
the heart and soul of a comedian

190
00:08:12,630 --> 00:08:14,099
that makes you want to make
people laugh,

191
00:08:14,165 --> 00:08:16,904
that makes you want to stand
upstage alone?

192
00:08:16,971 --> 00:08:23,150
Damage. [ laughing ]

193
00:08:23,217 --> 00:08:26,323
No. [ laughing ] I'm sorry.

194
00:08:26,390 --> 00:08:29,262
Um...no, I don't know.

195
00:08:29,329 --> 00:08:31,801
Yeah, there's probably a little
piece of a lot of us

196
00:08:31,868 --> 00:08:34,640
that is filling
some sort of void, right?

197
00:08:34,707 --> 00:08:36,678
[ indistinct conversations ]

198
00:08:36,744 --> 00:08:38,648
Where are you guys from?

199
00:08:38,715 --> 00:08:41,386
Here? Okay, what do you do?

200
00:08:41,453 --> 00:08:43,223
You're a social w‐‐
That's probably why

201
00:08:43,290 --> 00:08:45,061
you've been laughing so hard.
‐ [ laughter ]

202
00:08:45,127 --> 00:08:47,599
Yeah, my mother's a therapist,
too.

203
00:08:47,666 --> 00:08:49,169
Yeah, it's incredible.

204
00:08:49,235 --> 00:08:51,206
She saw clients in the basement
of my house my entire life,

205
00:08:51,273 --> 00:08:53,110
so I had to be quiet.
She'd be like,

206
00:08:53,177 --> 00:08:56,985
"Judy's coming today, and she's
having a really hard time.

207
00:08:57,051 --> 00:08:58,989
"So I'm gonna need you
to be quiet upstairs,

208
00:08:59,055 --> 00:09:02,328
'cause Judy needs help.
Judy's really struggling."

209
00:09:02,395 --> 00:09:06,269
Ju‐‐ [ laughs ] I'm like,
"Well, I just ate six pizzas...

210
00:09:06,336 --> 00:09:09,242
and started cutting,
but good luck to Judy."

211
00:09:09,309 --> 00:09:11,213
[ laughter ]

212
00:09:11,279 --> 00:09:12,950
Okay, um...

213
00:09:13,017 --> 00:09:14,285
I say this onstage as a joke,

214
00:09:14,352 --> 00:09:16,156
but, like,
people start clapping.

215
00:09:16,223 --> 00:09:17,559
I'm like, no matter how much
you clap,

216
00:09:17,626 --> 00:09:19,162
it'll never fill the hole.

217
00:09:19,229 --> 00:09:21,567
Like, we're just trying to fill
this hole

218
00:09:21,634 --> 00:09:22,803
and get the attention
that we've always wanted

219
00:09:22,870 --> 00:09:24,874
that we can't get.

220
00:09:24,940 --> 00:09:27,278
I think it really goes back
to childhood

221
00:09:27,345 --> 00:09:29,617
and just always wanting to be
seen and heard

222
00:09:29,684 --> 00:09:31,788
and not feeling acknowledged.

223
00:09:31,854 --> 00:09:34,259
I was not a happy kid.

224
00:09:34,325 --> 00:09:37,533
My parents weren't happy
together, and, you know,

225
00:09:37,599 --> 00:09:39,870
my father would be, like,
tough on me,

226
00:09:39,937 --> 00:09:42,609
so I just kept thinking
I'm bad, I'm wrong.

227
00:09:42,676 --> 00:09:44,780
I used to fight boys every day
after school,

228
00:09:44,847 --> 00:09:48,955
and I would normally not win.

229
00:09:49,022 --> 00:09:51,828
I was very tomboyish,

230
00:09:51,894 --> 00:09:55,468
no interest in dolls,
really tall.

231
00:09:55,535 --> 00:09:58,006
I got teased from the minute
I got up

232
00:09:58,073 --> 00:10:01,046
to the minute I came home
from school.

233
00:10:01,113 --> 00:10:02,415
6'3". I'm very tall.
That is kinda tall.

234
00:10:02,482 --> 00:10:04,587
Actually,
I reached this height‐‐

235
00:10:04,653 --> 00:10:06,490
I was about 13 years old,
which was horrible,

236
00:10:06,557 --> 00:10:08,127
'cause I'd walk down the halls
in grammar school.

237
00:10:08,193 --> 00:10:09,429
Everyone called me "Sasquatch"
and everything, right?

238
00:10:09,496 --> 00:10:11,734
‐ I didn't know what to do.
‐ [ laughter ]

239
00:10:11,801 --> 00:10:13,137
Yeah, thanks a lot.

240
00:10:13,203 --> 00:10:14,640
Then I'd go home to my mother.

241
00:10:14,707 --> 00:10:16,476
I'd be like, "Mom, all the kids
are teasing me in school.

242
00:10:16,544 --> 00:10:18,715
I don't know what to do."
She'd say to me...

243
00:10:18,782 --> 00:10:20,251
[ sighs heavily ]

244
00:10:20,317 --> 00:10:22,321
"Judith, don't worry about it.
They're jealous of you.

245
00:10:22,388 --> 00:10:23,992
"Go upstairs and put on
your father's clothes.

246
00:10:24,058 --> 00:10:25,227
"Leave me alone.
Get away from me.

247
00:10:25,294 --> 00:10:27,465
I can't stand your pain."
‐ [ laughter ]

248
00:10:27,533 --> 00:10:29,235
Yeah, I got bullied a lot.
We moved‐‐

249
00:10:29,302 --> 00:10:30,872
my family‐‐
my dad moved my family

250
00:10:30,939 --> 00:10:33,177
to the suburbs of Chicago.

251
00:10:33,243 --> 00:10:34,412
So there wasn't
many Black people,

252
00:10:34,479 --> 00:10:36,083
and it was very prejudiced,
so, you know,

253
00:10:36,149 --> 00:10:38,621
I got called the "N" word
all the time.

254
00:10:38,688 --> 00:10:43,063
I didn't like to fight.
I didn't like confrontation.

255
00:10:43,130 --> 00:10:44,099
So I was always the one
that came in

256
00:10:44,165 --> 00:10:45,902
and tried to make people laugh.

257
00:10:45,969 --> 00:10:48,608
But I didn't know
what I wanted to do.

258
00:10:48,675 --> 00:10:51,046
My family felt
I should play it safe,

259
00:10:51,113 --> 00:10:53,283
get something where you don't
get fired.

260
00:10:53,350 --> 00:10:56,490
So I chose to be
a legal secretary.

261
00:10:56,557 --> 00:10:58,528
This is like eons ago.

262
00:10:58,595 --> 00:11:01,634
I come from
a very traditional family.

263
00:11:01,701 --> 00:11:04,205
I grew up in Spain
and moved to the states

264
00:11:04,272 --> 00:11:06,476
when I was 8, and I was very shy

265
00:11:06,544 --> 00:11:08,413
'cause I would say things
incorrectly,

266
00:11:08,480 --> 00:11:10,886
and then someone would laugh.
Like, I would just be like,

267
00:11:10,952 --> 00:11:13,323
well, I'm not gonna
speak up then.

268
00:11:13,390 --> 00:11:18,802
To my family,
I was a very strange person.

269
00:11:18,868 --> 00:11:20,237
I liked things they didn't like.

270
00:11:20,304 --> 00:11:22,676
I found humor in things
that they didn't find funny.

271
00:11:22,743 --> 00:11:23,845
They were very hard‐working.

272
00:11:23,912 --> 00:11:25,147
We grew up on a farm.

273
00:11:25,214 --> 00:11:27,251
For a long time,
we didn't have running water.

274
00:11:27,318 --> 00:11:29,590
I, uh, I'm from Canada.
I grew up on a farm there,

275
00:11:29,657 --> 00:11:31,894
and I live in here
but, you know,

276
00:11:31,961 --> 00:11:33,063
everyone back home's
always like,

277
00:11:33,130 --> 00:11:34,567
"Hey, don't go Hollywood."

278
00:11:34,633 --> 00:11:37,104
I'm like, I wanna
go Hollywood, you know?

279
00:11:37,171 --> 00:11:38,575
‐ [ laughter ]
‐ I wanna have it all.

280
00:11:38,641 --> 00:11:41,814
I wanna have a convertible,
a car phone, a drug addiction.

281
00:11:41,881 --> 00:11:43,083
[ laughter ]

282
00:11:43,150 --> 00:11:44,687
I just have to get
a convertible.

283
00:11:44,753 --> 00:11:47,024
[ laughter ]

284
00:11:47,091 --> 00:11:48,728
I am this close.

285
00:11:48,795 --> 00:11:51,934
Everyone assumes you're kind of
the class clown that's, like,

286
00:11:52,001 --> 00:11:53,103
"Look at me, look at me."

287
00:11:53,170 --> 00:11:55,040
But I was a cautious kid.

288
00:11:55,107 --> 00:11:57,946
My mom said I would always
look both ways

289
00:11:58,013 --> 00:12:00,184
before crossing the street.

290
00:12:00,251 --> 00:12:05,327
So it's weird that I ended up
in this job that has

291
00:12:05,394 --> 00:12:06,664
such a lack of stability,

292
00:12:06,731 --> 00:12:10,004
and you're having to take risks
all the time.

293
00:12:10,070 --> 00:12:13,210
I grew up in the suburbs
of Dallas, Texas,

294
00:12:13,277 --> 00:12:15,047
for many years, with, like,
a single mom.

295
00:12:15,114 --> 00:12:16,651
And I moved schools a lot,

296
00:12:16,717 --> 00:12:19,657
so I definitely never felt like
I fit in,

297
00:12:19,723 --> 00:12:21,459
especially growing up
in Dallas, Texas.

298
00:12:21,527 --> 00:12:23,965
Like, all the girls had bangs.
They were perfect, Christian.

299
00:12:24,032 --> 00:12:25,669
And then it was, like, me.

300
00:12:25,735 --> 00:12:27,038
You did wear an eye patch
as a child.

301
00:12:27,104 --> 00:12:29,042
‐ I did.
‐ I know that about you.

302
00:12:29,108 --> 00:12:30,177
I had something called
amblyopia.

303
00:12:30,244 --> 00:12:31,313
‐ Right.
‐ Which affects a lot of people.

304
00:12:31,379 --> 00:12:32,716
‐ Really?
‐ And so I had an eye patch,

305
00:12:32,783 --> 00:12:34,753
and then I had a special one
that went over my glasses.

306
00:12:34,820 --> 00:12:36,256
‐ Oh, no.
‐ I went to a private school.

307
00:12:36,323 --> 00:12:38,528
In private school, like,
no one makes fun of anyone

308
00:12:38,595 --> 00:12:39,797
because it's‐‐
'cause public school,

309
00:12:39,863 --> 00:12:41,867
it's like, "Yeah!
You know, think fast, nerd."

310
00:12:41,934 --> 00:12:43,270
‐ Right.
‐ And in private school,

311
00:12:43,337 --> 00:12:44,305
it's like, "We don't know
how rich your parents are,

312
00:12:44,372 --> 00:12:45,842
so let's err on the side
of caution."

313
00:12:45,909 --> 00:12:47,579
[ laughter and applause ]

314
00:12:47,646 --> 00:12:51,754
I was, like, an emergency moron
in school.

315
00:12:51,821 --> 00:12:54,058
Like, I mean, they didn't know
what to do.

316
00:12:54,125 --> 00:12:58,200
There was a lot of meetings
about me, just like Ds, Fs.

317
00:12:58,267 --> 00:12:59,737
They were just like,
"Uh, yeah, she's‐‐

318
00:12:59,803 --> 00:13:02,308
I mean, we don't know why
she's dumb."

319
00:13:02,375 --> 00:13:05,481
I loved voices.
I loved affectations

320
00:13:05,548 --> 00:13:07,451
and how people speak,
so since I was little,

321
00:13:07,519 --> 00:13:10,090
I would get attention
that way.

322
00:13:10,157 --> 00:13:11,727
But I couldn't learn.

323
00:13:11,794 --> 00:13:14,600
I couldn't stuff information
in my brain,

324
00:13:14,667 --> 00:13:16,503
so I moved to New York
when I was 17

325
00:13:16,570 --> 00:13:20,912
with this guy and his band
called Dick Sister.

326
00:13:20,979 --> 00:13:24,052
All I knew is that I really
loved stand‐up comedy.

327
00:13:24,118 --> 00:13:25,956
I love the artform
and I knew that I was

328
00:13:26,022 --> 00:13:29,429
meant to do it
in some capacity.

329
00:13:29,495 --> 00:13:32,301
But there was
no real aspirations

330
00:13:32,368 --> 00:13:36,276
of stardom or success,
'cause I'd never seen

331
00:13:36,343 --> 00:13:38,715
Asian Americans do that,
and I'd never seen,

332
00:13:38,781 --> 00:13:41,520
really, that many women
doing that.

333
00:13:41,587 --> 00:13:45,394
You know, maybe I would get
to open for a big star

334
00:13:45,461 --> 00:13:47,264
when they came
into San Francisco.

335
00:13:47,331 --> 00:13:51,874
Maybe I could be a weatherwoman
in the local news.

336
00:13:51,941 --> 00:13:55,548
I think I had a good childhood,
my mother asked me to tell you.

337
00:13:55,615 --> 00:13:57,218
Um, no, but I had, like,
a lemonade stand

338
00:13:57,285 --> 00:13:59,088
with a 2‐drink minimum.

339
00:13:59,155 --> 00:14:02,829
I was clinically depressed.

340
00:14:02,896 --> 00:14:04,833
For me, personally, it was that

341
00:14:04,900 --> 00:14:06,904
it didn't seem like I made
a difference.

342
00:14:06,971 --> 00:14:11,046
It gave me an identity
to be the funny one.

343
00:14:11,112 --> 00:14:12,315
Wendy Liebman,
ladies and gentlemen.

344
00:14:12,381 --> 00:14:14,285
Let's talk about
your coming up.

345
00:14:14,352 --> 00:14:16,189
How was St. Louis growing up?

346
00:14:16,256 --> 00:14:18,193
It was great. It was‐‐
I had the best childhood.

347
00:14:18,260 --> 00:14:19,563
‐ I l‐‐ Yeah.
‐ Really?

348
00:14:19,630 --> 00:14:20,565
Well, something's wrong already.
Hang on.

349
00:14:20,632 --> 00:14:22,803
‐ Okay.
‐ Cannot compute.

350
00:14:22,869 --> 00:14:24,138
Did you say you had a sister
that you‐‐

351
00:14:24,205 --> 00:14:25,675
Yeah, I had
a really beautiful sister.

352
00:14:25,742 --> 00:14:27,011
Was that why you started
searching for ways

353
00:14:27,078 --> 00:14:29,148
to get attention
and found comedy?

354
00:14:29,215 --> 00:14:31,353
Yeah, I had buck teeth
and no value,

355
00:14:31,419 --> 00:14:33,624
and so I was like, I have to
come up with something.

356
00:14:33,691 --> 00:14:37,064
Here we are in our condo.
Kids watching TV.

357
00:14:37,131 --> 00:14:39,803
It's the best talk show ever.

358
00:14:39,870 --> 00:14:41,907
I loved Hollywood,
and I loved models,

359
00:14:41,974 --> 00:14:43,611
and I wanted to be them.

360
00:14:43,678 --> 00:14:44,880
Like, I just knew
when I was a kid,

361
00:14:44,947 --> 00:14:47,719
like, that I was gonna make it
happen somehow.

362
00:14:47,786 --> 00:14:49,022
[ giggles ]

363
00:14:49,088 --> 00:14:52,562
But then I realized I wasn't
as pretty as my sister

364
00:14:52,629 --> 00:14:54,600
and that the pretty girls
were getting the roles

365
00:14:54,666 --> 00:14:55,902
in the plays.

366
00:14:55,969 --> 00:14:57,338
Mmm.

367
00:14:57,405 --> 00:15:00,411
Everywhere my mom took us,
people would stop my mom

368
00:15:00,477 --> 00:15:02,616
and be like, "This child
needs to be a model"

369
00:15:02,683 --> 00:15:04,553
about my sister,
and I would literally, like,

370
00:15:04,620 --> 00:15:07,358
creep from behind my mom's legs
like Nosferatu,

371
00:15:07,425 --> 00:15:09,663
like, "What should I be?"
[ laughter ]

372
00:15:09,730 --> 00:15:12,101
Just waiting.

373
00:15:12,168 --> 00:15:13,437
And what about me?

374
00:15:13,503 --> 00:15:15,775
What's my future hold?

375
00:15:15,842 --> 00:15:17,779
I had a therapist.
She used to yell at me

376
00:15:17,846 --> 00:15:20,484
and be like,
"You're not a beauty.

377
00:15:20,552 --> 00:15:22,321
"You're average‐looking,
and it's enough,

378
00:15:22,388 --> 00:15:23,624
and it's fine."
‐ Oh, my God.

379
00:15:23,691 --> 00:15:24,927
Yeah, she was really,
really harsh.

380
00:15:24,993 --> 00:15:27,632
‐ Oh, my God.
‐ I've had some bad therapists.

381
00:15:27,699 --> 00:15:31,039
‐ I go to therapy, too.
‐ [ laughter ]

382
00:15:31,106 --> 00:15:33,644
I have to.

383
00:15:33,711 --> 00:15:35,782
Mine is very expensive, too.
I actually told her.

384
00:15:35,849 --> 00:15:37,251
I said, "You know,
you're too expensive.

385
00:15:37,318 --> 00:15:38,588
I don't think I can afford you."

386
00:15:38,654 --> 00:15:40,257
And she just looked at me,
and she said,

387
00:15:40,324 --> 00:15:42,763
"Let's talk about why that is."

388
00:15:42,829 --> 00:15:45,535
[ laughter ]

389
00:15:45,602 --> 00:15:48,340
I grew up in Chicago,
Highland Park,

390
00:15:48,407 --> 00:15:50,678
which is
a very white neighborhood.

391
00:15:50,745 --> 00:15:52,682
They weren't racist
at my school,

392
00:15:52,749 --> 00:15:55,454
but when I went to camp,
it was really bad.

393
00:15:55,522 --> 00:15:58,360
They would say things like,
"She's‐‐Her skin's dirty."

394
00:15:58,427 --> 00:16:01,734
You know,
"She looks like she smells."

395
00:16:01,801 --> 00:16:03,938
They would say awful, awful
things on the bus.

396
00:16:04,005 --> 00:16:05,675
Bus driver never said anything.

397
00:16:05,742 --> 00:16:09,048
Back then, you just had to learn
how to live with it,

398
00:16:09,115 --> 00:16:12,923
and one of the ways I did
was by being funny.

399
00:16:12,989 --> 00:16:15,862
I didn't know that I had a thing
for comedy.

400
00:16:15,929 --> 00:16:19,870
I had no idea.

401
00:16:19,937 --> 00:16:24,011
My mother was a big yeller.
She was‐‐had a lot of rage.

402
00:16:24,078 --> 00:16:26,917
She had these rageful attacks
when we were growing up,

403
00:16:26,984 --> 00:16:28,754
and I think I was
that middle child

404
00:16:28,821 --> 00:16:31,994
who could make Mom laugh to
defuse the tension in the house.

405
00:16:32,061 --> 00:16:33,497
Looking at this head,
it reminds me to go home

406
00:16:33,564 --> 00:16:35,668
and clean my dildo.

407
00:16:35,735 --> 00:16:37,004
[ laughter ]

408
00:16:37,071 --> 00:16:41,580
[ snorts ] That's not true.
Mine's black. Anyway...

409
00:16:41,647 --> 00:16:44,953
So I as a comic was doing jokes
to shut everybody up

410
00:16:45,020 --> 00:16:47,124
before they get to me.

411
00:16:47,191 --> 00:16:49,328
Wait a minute.
You're Hispanic?

412
00:16:49,395 --> 00:16:52,134
Oh, my God.
You look so employed.

413
00:16:52,201 --> 00:16:53,704
[ laughter ]

414
00:16:53,771 --> 00:16:56,610
I'm pretty sure 90% of my stuff
is all these insults

415
00:16:56,677 --> 00:16:58,146
making fun of the audience.

416
00:16:58,213 --> 00:17:02,354
I'm glad you people like me
because my mother hates me.

417
00:17:02,421 --> 00:17:03,991
[ laughter ]

418
00:17:04,058 --> 00:17:05,562
In my own family,

419
00:17:05,628 --> 00:17:09,837
I've always known laughter
to be the most healing thing.

420
00:17:09,903 --> 00:17:14,312
Everyone in the family has
touched trauma in some way.

421
00:17:14,378 --> 00:17:17,786
It's mostly not something
we talk about.

422
00:17:17,853 --> 00:17:20,491
So we choose to laugh
at funerals.

423
00:17:20,558 --> 00:17:24,700
We choose to laugh when
somebody's getting divorced.

424
00:17:24,766 --> 00:17:27,371
Someone has the job
to make things funny.

425
00:17:27,438 --> 00:17:30,110
We look to that person,
and it helps.

426
00:17:30,177 --> 00:17:34,151
And I made a choice to be
that person in my family.

427
00:17:34,218 --> 00:17:36,089
A lot of people tell me

428
00:17:36,155 --> 00:17:39,930
that I look really skinny as
a compliment pretty frequently.

429
00:17:39,997 --> 00:17:44,005
They often wanna know the secret
to how I maintain this figure,

430
00:17:44,071 --> 00:17:48,480
and, uh...secret is definitely
Irritable Bowel Syndrome...

431
00:17:48,548 --> 00:17:50,985
‐ [ laughter ]
‐ ...onset by severe stress

432
00:17:51,052 --> 00:17:53,089
and trauma, so... [ laughs ]

433
00:17:53,156 --> 00:17:55,528
I guess a lot of people
want a skinny girlfriend,

434
00:17:55,595 --> 00:17:57,832
but no one wants to know
how the sausage gets made, so...

435
00:17:57,899 --> 00:18:00,370
[ laughter ]

436
00:18:00,437 --> 00:18:01,439
Fine.

437
00:18:01,506 --> 00:18:02,259
[ applause ]

438
00:18:08,486 --> 00:18:13,931
♪♪♪♪♪♪

439
00:18:13,998 --> 00:18:16,971
Jerry, who are
your favorite female comedians?

440
00:18:17,037 --> 00:18:19,776
My favorite female comedian
was Cary Grant.

441
00:18:19,843 --> 00:18:21,947
[ laughter ]

442
00:18:22,014 --> 00:18:28,561
I cannot sit and watch a lady
diminish her qualities

443
00:18:28,628 --> 00:18:31,099
to the lowest
common denominator.

444
00:18:31,165 --> 00:18:33,069
I just can't do that.

445
00:18:33,136 --> 00:18:35,608
You know what you look like
normally?

446
00:18:35,675 --> 00:18:37,344
You look like the lady
that looks in the fun mirror

447
00:18:37,411 --> 00:18:39,683
at the Palisades Park.

448
00:18:39,750 --> 00:18:41,687
‐ [ laughter ]
‐ Short and fat.

449
00:18:41,754 --> 00:18:45,460
But you're regular like that.
Did you ever notice?

450
00:18:45,528 --> 00:18:47,599
I look in the mirror.
I see Raquel Welch.

451
00:18:47,666 --> 00:18:49,302
‐ [ laughter ]
‐ I swear!

452
00:18:49,368 --> 00:18:50,605
She's staying with you?

453
00:18:50,672 --> 00:18:52,842
No, I got a picture of her
in my mirror.

454
00:18:52,909 --> 00:18:53,811
[ laughter ]

455
00:18:53,878 --> 00:18:55,347
You're different
from other girls.

456
00:18:55,414 --> 00:18:57,418
That's what you think.

457
00:18:57,484 --> 00:19:00,692
You're smarter.
You're almost like a man.

458
00:19:00,758 --> 00:19:05,267
As a little kid, I really didn't
understand, like,

459
00:19:05,334 --> 00:19:10,410
why does he get to do that,
and I have to do this?

460
00:19:10,477 --> 00:19:12,448
Just 'cause he's a boy?

461
00:19:12,515 --> 00:19:16,389
Like, I was really floored
by that.

462
00:19:16,456 --> 00:19:18,761
<i>MALE NARRATOR: Carol took</i>
<i>a general home economics course,</i>

463
00:19:18,828 --> 00:19:22,034
<i>one which fitted her</i>
<i>for that very important career</i>

464
00:19:22,101 --> 00:19:24,138
<i>of being Mrs. Johnson.</i>

465
00:19:24,205 --> 00:19:25,942
<i>She was glad that</i>
<i>her college training</i>

466
00:19:26,009 --> 00:19:28,280
<i>had prepared her so well</i>
<i>for home life.</i>

467
00:19:28,346 --> 00:19:31,085
The idea of what femininity is,

468
00:19:31,152 --> 00:19:34,091
and in a lot of people's minds,
still is,

469
00:19:34,158 --> 00:19:38,734
is dainty, quiet, ladylike.

470
00:19:38,801 --> 00:19:42,174
You learn
the most ladylike thing

471
00:19:42,241 --> 00:19:44,312
is to shut your fucking mouth

472
00:19:44,378 --> 00:19:48,587
and not have an opinion
and whatever your husband says.

473
00:19:48,654 --> 00:19:52,094
And here were these women comics
who were like,

474
00:19:52,161 --> 00:19:55,568
"Don't tell me what I can say.
Don't tell me what I can do.

475
00:19:55,635 --> 00:19:58,039
Go fuck yourself."

476
00:19:58,106 --> 00:19:59,075
[ applause ]

477
00:19:59,141 --> 00:20:01,613
[ laughs ]

478
00:20:01,680 --> 00:20:03,316
Thank you, children.
Thank you, darling.

479
00:20:03,383 --> 00:20:06,389
I know you children are all
relaxed back there,

480
00:20:06,456 --> 00:20:08,159
sitting back there,
looking at Moms.

481
00:20:08,226 --> 00:20:12,468
You think you're going to hear
some jokes, don't you?

482
00:20:12,535 --> 00:20:15,340
Well, Moms don't know none.

483
00:20:15,407 --> 00:20:20,685
Moms don't know no jokes,
but I can tell you some facts.

484
00:20:20,752 --> 00:20:24,492
Moms Mabley‐‐I admire her
on so many levels

485
00:20:24,559 --> 00:20:28,567
because she, in order to really
get out there and tell her truth

486
00:20:28,634 --> 00:20:31,205
and for people to‐‐
for it to be palatable

487
00:20:31,272 --> 00:20:34,680
to an audience, she had to dress
like an old woman.

488
00:20:34,746 --> 00:20:37,017
She was very opinionated,
but in order for them

489
00:20:37,084 --> 00:20:41,727
to accept what she had to say,
she had to be an old woman.

490
00:20:41,794 --> 00:20:43,631
What do they call‐‐Do they call
you Jackie down there or Moms?

491
00:20:43,698 --> 00:20:45,868
I've never known. It's Jackie?

492
00:20:45,935 --> 00:20:47,171
No, they like me down there
to tell the truth.

493
00:20:47,237 --> 00:20:48,440
Yeah.

494
00:20:48,506 --> 00:20:49,910
They named me
Roy Rogers' horse.

495
00:20:49,976 --> 00:20:51,245
‐ Trigger?
‐ Trigger, yeah.

496
00:20:51,312 --> 00:20:52,749
That's what they call you
in the South?

497
00:20:52,816 --> 00:20:55,387
Yeah. Everywhere I go,
"Hello, Trigger!

498
00:20:55,454 --> 00:20:58,561
What you say, Trigger?"

499
00:20:58,627 --> 00:21:01,065
At least I think that's what
they said.

500
00:21:01,132 --> 00:21:03,671
[ laughter ]

501
00:21:03,738 --> 00:21:06,376
In the beginning,
it was a lot of people

502
00:21:06,442 --> 00:21:09,783
that people don't know about‐‐
Totie Fields, Belle Barth.

503
00:21:09,850 --> 00:21:12,020
Sophie Tucker, Jean Carroll,

504
00:21:12,087 --> 00:21:13,724
who doesn't get enough credit
at all

505
00:21:13,791 --> 00:21:17,866
for being one of
the first female stand‐ups.

506
00:21:17,932 --> 00:21:19,870
When I said, "And I'll buy
something in satin

507
00:21:19,936 --> 00:21:21,607
to match my eyes," she said,

508
00:21:21,673 --> 00:21:23,544
"We have no bloodshot satin
in stock."

509
00:21:23,611 --> 00:21:24,880
[ laughter ]

510
00:21:24,946 --> 00:21:26,950
Well, I said,
"If you don't mind,

511
00:21:27,017 --> 00:21:28,821
I'd like to bring my husband
down and have him look at it."

512
00:21:28,888 --> 00:21:30,558
She says,
"Jenny, look who's married."

513
00:21:30,625 --> 00:21:33,496
[ laughter ]

514
00:21:33,564 --> 00:21:37,504
You go back and look at all‐‐
women would get onstage,

515
00:21:37,572 --> 00:21:40,611
acknowledge that
they're pieces of shit,

516
00:21:40,678 --> 00:21:43,483
and then go,
"Okay, so here are my jokes."

517
00:21:43,551 --> 00:21:44,753
It was like,
"Hi. I know I'm a woman.

518
00:21:44,820 --> 00:21:46,990
"I know I should be home
with my kids

519
00:21:47,057 --> 00:21:48,861
"so I'm going to
acknowledge that and then,

520
00:21:48,928 --> 00:21:50,765
can you listen to my jokes,
please?"

521
00:21:50,832 --> 00:21:53,303
But look, I love my work.
I really do.

522
00:21:53,369 --> 00:21:55,040
Of course, it's scary.
The lights scare me to death.

523
00:21:55,107 --> 00:21:57,779
Boy, you see they're so bright.
Like, when I was a housewife,

524
00:21:57,846 --> 00:21:59,749
if I ever had this much light
on me,

525
00:21:59,816 --> 00:22:02,589
when I woke up,
I had another kid.

526
00:22:02,655 --> 00:22:05,628
[ laughter ]

527
00:22:11,272 --> 00:22:13,276
Isn't that amazing?

528
00:22:14,513 --> 00:22:16,182
Or...

529
00:22:16,249 --> 00:22:17,217
[ laughter ]

530
00:22:35,187 --> 00:22:36,623
Well...

531
00:22:39,428 --> 00:22:41,967
I can't even imagine doing
stand‐up at that time.

532
00:22:42,034 --> 00:22:44,940
I‐I don't even know
how these women did it.

533
00:22:45,006 --> 00:22:46,944
Well,
here's my daffy little friend.

534
00:22:47,010 --> 00:22:50,317
Our daffy little friend.
My little pixie friend.

535
00:22:50,383 --> 00:22:52,321
Little Joan Rivers.

536
00:22:52,387 --> 00:22:57,231
[ applause ]

537
00:22:57,297 --> 00:22:58,534
♪♪♪♪♪♪

538
00:22:58,601 --> 00:23:01,673
I loved Joan so much.

539
00:23:01,740 --> 00:23:07,785
Here's this brash Jewish woman
on television with opinions.

540
00:23:07,852 --> 00:23:09,956
Well, it's all sex.
That magazine, you know,

541
00:23:10,023 --> 00:23:11,359
the lead article‐‐
"How to use your breasts

542
00:23:11,425 --> 00:23:13,697
to get a better apartment,"
and it's like, you know...

543
00:23:13,764 --> 00:23:15,200
[ laughter ]

544
00:23:15,267 --> 00:23:16,637
Ding‐dong.

545
00:23:16,703 --> 00:23:17,672
[ laughter ]

546
00:23:17,739 --> 00:23:20,277
She was hysterical.

547
00:23:20,343 --> 00:23:25,487
You know, on a show with
the whitest guy in the universe,

548
00:23:25,555 --> 00:23:29,395
like, Nebraska,
making him laugh.

549
00:23:29,461 --> 00:23:31,700
I had no idea where
you were going there.

550
00:23:31,767 --> 00:23:33,904
‐ [ laughter ]
‐ You‐‐You always amaze me.

551
00:23:33,971 --> 00:23:38,747
It was like, oh, that's‐‐
that's what I wanna be.

552
00:23:38,814 --> 00:23:41,485
♪♪♪♪♪♪

553
00:23:41,553 --> 00:23:44,726
I saw Wanda onstage in college,

554
00:23:44,793 --> 00:23:46,964
and she was
the first Black woman

555
00:23:47,030 --> 00:23:48,901
that reminded me of myself.

556
00:23:48,968 --> 00:23:51,005
I was like, "I can do this."

557
00:23:51,072 --> 00:23:53,276
Now you see,
that's love right there.

558
00:23:53,343 --> 00:23:54,813
I remember doing improv
in high school,

559
00:23:54,880 --> 00:23:56,182
and the boys would always grab
the mic first,

560
00:23:56,249 --> 00:23:57,685
and I remember thinking, like,
"You motherfucker,

561
00:23:57,752 --> 00:23:59,522
"I'm gonna do this for a living,

562
00:23:59,589 --> 00:24:02,695
so quit hogging the mic
with your garbage jokes."

563
00:24:02,762 --> 00:24:04,331
It never occurred to me, like,

564
00:24:04,398 --> 00:24:06,502
I'm a girl.
I can't get up there.

565
00:24:06,570 --> 00:24:07,739
I didn't wanna do stand‐up.

566
00:24:07,805 --> 00:24:10,443
I didn't think I was
a good performer,

567
00:24:10,510 --> 00:24:11,914
but I love writing jokes.

568
00:24:11,980 --> 00:24:15,888
So on my 23rd birthday,
I booked myself on an open mic,

569
00:24:15,955 --> 00:24:18,092
and I went down.

570
00:24:18,159 --> 00:24:21,934
I was just frozen with fear.

571
00:24:22,000 --> 00:24:23,604
I was not fulfilled.

572
00:24:23,671 --> 00:24:27,277
I had such low self‐worth.
My mom was very sick,

573
00:24:27,344 --> 00:24:30,317
'cause I had a sister
that was on drugs.

574
00:24:30,383 --> 00:24:31,954
I just wasn't happy.

575
00:24:32,020 --> 00:24:34,859
Just feeling frustration,

576
00:24:34,926 --> 00:24:37,431
like I'd just
shut everything down.

577
00:24:37,497 --> 00:24:40,103
It's almost like it just
filled up so much

578
00:24:40,170 --> 00:24:43,076
that I was, like,
I need to speak.

579
00:24:43,142 --> 00:24:44,846
My voice has to come out.

580
00:24:44,913 --> 00:24:46,850
Carmen Lynch, everybody.

581
00:24:46,917 --> 00:24:49,421
[ cheers and applause ]

582
00:24:49,488 --> 00:24:50,925
It was a huge step for me.

583
00:24:50,992 --> 00:24:53,196
Sometimes I'm shocked
that I did it.

584
00:24:53,262 --> 00:24:55,333
I did really well.
I was like...

585
00:24:55,400 --> 00:24:58,607
this is my calling,
and then, uh,

586
00:24:58,674 --> 00:25:01,947
you know, the next 400 times
I bombed pretty badly.

587
00:25:02,014 --> 00:25:03,984
The first time I got offstage
when I was 18,

588
00:25:04,051 --> 00:25:05,988
I called my dad and was like,
"I know what I wanna do

589
00:25:06,055 --> 00:25:07,792
"for all‐‐forever,

590
00:25:07,859 --> 00:25:09,629
and I'm gonna do it,
and this is it."

591
00:25:09,696 --> 00:25:12,067
We were both crying on the phone
because I was anorexic.

592
00:25:12,134 --> 00:25:14,171
I was still, like,
battling the illness.

593
00:25:14,238 --> 00:25:16,777
It was like, finally,
something that's gonna get me

594
00:25:16,843 --> 00:25:18,814
to figure out how to beat this.

595
00:25:18,881 --> 00:25:22,254
I was like 28,
and I went onstage,

596
00:25:22,321 --> 00:25:25,260
and I killed, and it was
the best feeling in the world.

597
00:25:25,327 --> 00:25:27,464
I was like, this is where
I need to be.

598
00:25:27,532 --> 00:25:29,268
[ applause ]

599
00:25:29,335 --> 00:25:33,844
My life was craziness and chaos,
but once I got on that stage,

600
00:25:33,911 --> 00:25:36,783
it was like life was all good.

601
00:25:36,850 --> 00:25:39,388
It was a peace that settled
over me.

602
00:25:39,455 --> 00:25:44,699
I started at the Comedy Store
performing at 1 in the morning

603
00:25:44,766 --> 00:25:47,371
for four drunk guys,
and it sucked,

604
00:25:47,437 --> 00:25:50,143
but I liked that challenge
of having to be

605
00:25:50,210 --> 00:25:52,114
in the middle of Hollywood.

606
00:25:52,180 --> 00:25:55,020
There's alcohol.
There's cynicism.

607
00:25:55,086 --> 00:25:56,222
And I'm like,
"I'm gonna make you laugh.

608
00:25:56,288 --> 00:25:57,859
"I'm gonna figure it out.

609
00:25:57,925 --> 00:25:59,829
"I might not make you laugh
tonight,

610
00:25:59,896 --> 00:26:02,000
but I'm gonna make you laugh
tomorrow night."

611
00:26:02,067 --> 00:26:04,304
[ cheers and applause ]

612
00:26:04,371 --> 00:26:06,610
[ laughter ]

613
00:26:06,677 --> 00:26:08,881
♪♪♪♪♪♪

614
00:26:08,947 --> 00:26:12,722
There's the dream,
there's the fantasy,

615
00:26:12,789 --> 00:26:16,530
and then there's
the reality check.

616
00:26:16,596 --> 00:26:20,003
I had never understood sexism

617
00:26:20,070 --> 00:26:23,076
until I got
into the comedy scene.

618
00:26:27,985 --> 00:26:31,626
[ faint laughter ]

619
00:26:35,701 --> 00:26:38,874
Yeah, I'm not gonna guide
any lady through comedy.

620
00:26:38,941 --> 00:26:40,343
That would take me, uh,
first of all,

621
00:26:40,410 --> 00:26:42,715
I'd have to figure out
how a lady could do comedy.

622
00:26:42,782 --> 00:26:44,786
‐ [ laughter ]
‐ You know?

623
00:26:44,853 --> 00:26:46,288
And then I'd have to...

624
00:26:46,355 --> 00:26:47,725
‐ [ laughter continues ]
‐ Wow!

625
00:26:47,792 --> 00:26:49,529
‐ There was no‐‐
‐ Easy, Jerry Lewis.

626
00:26:49,596 --> 00:26:52,033
Stand‐up comedy's
a different kind of thing,

627
00:26:52,100 --> 00:26:53,469
for some reason.
‐ Yeah. Yes.

628
00:26:53,537 --> 00:26:56,643
Why do you think it is that guys
are only funny in that?

629
00:26:56,710 --> 00:26:58,413
‐ What is it?
‐ Artie?

630
00:26:58,479 --> 00:26:59,649
‐ [ laughter ]
‐ I don't‐‐I mean,

631
00:26:59,716 --> 00:27:01,352
I just think that it's
a man's world, you know?

632
00:27:01,419 --> 00:27:04,491
‐ I, uh, I‐I‐I don't, uh‐‐
‐ Is that the answer, though?

633
00:27:04,559 --> 00:27:05,895
‐ Yeah, that's‐‐
‐ Can that be the answer?

634
00:27:05,961 --> 00:27:07,397
It's a man's world?

635
00:27:07,464 --> 00:27:10,638
Still, to this day,
you hear over and over and over,

636
00:27:10,704 --> 00:27:13,042
"Women aren't funny.
Women aren't funny."

637
00:27:13,109 --> 00:27:14,445
It's ridiculous!

638
00:27:14,511 --> 00:27:16,650
There are funny men
and funny women.

639
00:27:16,716 --> 00:27:22,160
But I do understand that men
might not want women to be funny.

640
00:27:22,227 --> 00:27:24,198
‐ [ applause ]
‐ Wow, San Francisco.

641
00:27:24,264 --> 00:27:25,734
People are so friendly here.
I was on the cable car,

642
00:27:25,801 --> 00:27:29,041
and this guy offered me
a seat on his lap, and...

643
00:27:29,108 --> 00:27:30,410
[ laughter ]

644
00:27:30,477 --> 00:27:32,815
Then he got off,
but I‐I was gonna, um...

645
00:27:32,882 --> 00:27:34,519
[ laughter ]

646
00:27:34,586 --> 00:27:37,057
What? It was his stop.

647
00:27:37,124 --> 00:27:38,326
Where do you think that idea

648
00:27:38,392 --> 00:27:40,196
that women aren't funny
came from?

649
00:27:40,263 --> 00:27:42,300
I thought we weren't gonna
talk about this question.

650
00:27:42,367 --> 00:27:43,469
We're not gonna talk
about the fact

651
00:27:43,537 --> 00:27:45,039
that women aren't funny
'cause they are,

652
00:27:45,106 --> 00:27:46,576
but where do you think
the idea came from?

653
00:27:46,643 --> 00:27:48,146
It's not what I think.
It's what I know.

654
00:27:48,212 --> 00:27:50,283
And the answer is
men have always

655
00:27:50,350 --> 00:27:52,922
gotten to do things first,

656
00:27:52,989 --> 00:27:54,626
whether it's owning property

657
00:27:54,692 --> 00:27:57,665
or having freedom of speech
or anything fun,

658
00:27:57,732 --> 00:28:00,538
and expressing yourselves,
men got to do it first.

659
00:28:00,604 --> 00:28:03,109
So by sheer numbers,

660
00:28:03,176 --> 00:28:05,346
more men have been doing comedy
for longer

661
00:28:05,413 --> 00:28:07,284
because women for so long
were expected to stay home,

662
00:28:07,350 --> 00:28:08,587
have children, and then die.

663
00:28:08,654 --> 00:28:11,993
‐ That's pretty harsh.
‐ Well, so's your coffee.

664
00:28:12,060 --> 00:28:13,797
So it's not that women
aren't funny.

665
00:28:13,864 --> 00:28:16,268
Women weren't allowed
to express themselves,

666
00:28:16,335 --> 00:28:18,139
and they weren't allowed
to do it on a larger platform.

667
00:28:18,206 --> 00:28:22,648
I'm Lila, and I‐I don't know
what I'm doing.

668
00:28:22,715 --> 00:28:25,119
Way too often, I would hear,

669
00:28:25,186 --> 00:28:27,558
"Oh, we had a woman here
three months ago.

670
00:28:27,625 --> 00:28:33,135
She didn't do well, so we're not
booking women at this time."

671
00:28:33,202 --> 00:28:34,906
It used to be like if
you were doing shows, like,

672
00:28:34,973 --> 00:28:36,643
even up to the '90s,

673
00:28:36,710 --> 00:28:39,448
comedians would bring on
a female comedian,

674
00:28:39,516 --> 00:28:42,354
and they would say,
"Okay, we got a woman,"

675
00:28:42,420 --> 00:28:48,299
and people would go, "Ugh!"
Like, how dare you? [ laughs ]

676
00:28:48,366 --> 00:28:50,638
Sometimes they would put
their head on, they just...

677
00:28:50,704 --> 00:28:53,577
put their head right down
on the table and not watch you.

678
00:28:53,644 --> 00:28:57,217
There's always this guy
at every show that I do‐‐

679
00:28:57,284 --> 00:28:59,689
the arms folded, like,
"You ain't gonna be funny

680
00:28:59,756 --> 00:29:01,425
'cause you a bitch" guy.

681
00:29:01,492 --> 00:29:02,795
[ laughter ]

682
00:29:02,862 --> 00:29:04,532
Now, sir, I know you have
your arms folded the whole time.

683
00:29:04,599 --> 00:29:06,536
No, no, no, no. No, shut up.
No, he's great.

684
00:29:06,603 --> 00:29:08,272
He's laughed
at every single joke.

685
00:29:08,339 --> 00:29:11,245
The arms folded was just to
separate the tits from the gut.

686
00:29:11,312 --> 00:29:14,184
‐ I get it.
‐ [ laughter ]

687
00:29:14,251 --> 00:29:17,792
Tit sweat is a bitch.
I've been a victim of it myself.

688
00:29:17,858 --> 00:29:20,731
You'll see the evolvement
through the show

689
00:29:20,798 --> 00:29:22,868
where they're like this and...

690
00:29:22,935 --> 00:29:26,175
then like, 10 minutes later,
they're like this.

691
00:29:26,242 --> 00:29:29,348
And then by the end of the show,
they're like...

692
00:29:29,414 --> 00:29:31,786
They will be the first ones
in the meet and greet line,

693
00:29:31,853 --> 00:29:34,759
being like,
"I didn't wanna come tonight.

694
00:29:34,826 --> 00:29:37,364
I thought
this was gonna be garbage."

695
00:29:37,430 --> 00:29:40,871
"I usually hate female comics,
but you're good."

696
00:29:40,938 --> 00:29:42,742
Still have Facebook messages
from, like, 2010,

697
00:29:42,808 --> 00:29:45,881
like, "Women aren't funny,
but I think you are."

698
00:29:45,948 --> 00:29:48,954
I'm like, "Thanks, Mom."
[ laughs ]

699
00:29:49,021 --> 00:29:50,524
‐ [ applause ]
‐ Okay, here we go.

700
00:29:50,591 --> 00:29:52,160
Now we're gonna break it up
with a lovely young lady.

701
00:29:52,227 --> 00:29:54,064
Really, she's funny,
she's lovely,

702
00:29:54,131 --> 00:29:56,502
and she's a good girl, too.

703
00:29:56,569 --> 00:29:59,074
‐ [ laughter ]
‐ I found that out.

704
00:29:59,141 --> 00:30:00,043
This next comic,
you're gonna love her.

705
00:30:00,109 --> 00:30:02,582
She's very good. She's gorgeous.

706
00:30:02,648 --> 00:30:04,384
"We got little lady
coming up here.

707
00:30:04,451 --> 00:30:05,754
"I'll tell you what,
she's funny as a man.

708
00:30:05,821 --> 00:30:07,892
I mean it. Give her a hand."
‐ [ cheers and applause ]

709
00:30:07,959 --> 00:30:09,529
I've been intro'd,

710
00:30:09,596 --> 00:30:12,100
like the fact that I'm a woman
is like a wacky experiment.

711
00:30:12,167 --> 00:30:14,806
They'll be like, "We got
a young lady coming up!"

712
00:30:14,872 --> 00:30:17,110
You know, like,
"Let's see how this goes down."

713
00:30:17,177 --> 00:30:20,618
I think we should start doing it
about men.

714
00:30:20,684 --> 00:30:22,855
"Oh, this next guy coming
to the stage‐‐

715
00:30:22,922 --> 00:30:26,730
his balls are bigger than you've
ever seen in your whole life."

716
00:30:26,796 --> 00:30:28,934
"Yeah. You guys ready
for some big balls?"

717
00:30:29,001 --> 00:30:30,503
‐ "Oh, you guys like testicles?"
‐ Yeah, like especially‐‐

718
00:30:30,571 --> 00:30:31,906
'Cause this guy's
got two of 'em...

719
00:30:31,973 --> 00:30:33,175
Right.

720
00:30:33,242 --> 00:30:34,612
‐ ...as far as we know.
‐ Right.

721
00:30:34,679 --> 00:30:37,250
I think it's indisputable that
there has been a pipeline

722
00:30:37,317 --> 00:30:39,488
where there was a time
when it seemed like

723
00:30:39,555 --> 00:30:41,726
there really was only room
for one.

724
00:30:41,793 --> 00:30:45,333
If there was two women
back to back on a lineup,

725
00:30:45,400 --> 00:30:46,970
they would be like,
"Oh, we just had a woman on,"

726
00:30:47,037 --> 00:30:48,472
so we're gonna put a guy on, and
then we're gonna put you on."

727
00:30:48,540 --> 00:30:49,742
They would say that
to your face.

728
00:30:49,809 --> 00:30:52,581
It's not redundant
because you have two people

729
00:30:52,648 --> 00:30:55,320
of the same race or sex on
back to back,

730
00:30:55,386 --> 00:30:57,825
but they would openly say that
to you.

731
00:30:57,892 --> 00:30:59,494
It's like,
"Oh, we can't go vag, vag."

732
00:30:59,562 --> 00:31:01,533
Um, God forbid. We can go
dick, dick, dick, dick, dick,

733
00:31:01,599 --> 00:31:03,102
but we can't do two vages
in a row.

734
00:31:03,169 --> 00:31:05,173
That would confuse everyone.

735
00:31:05,239 --> 00:31:07,678
Okay, hold on, hold on.
It's a night of honesty.

736
00:31:07,745 --> 00:31:08,780
It's a night of honesty.

737
00:31:08,847 --> 00:31:11,218
Where are the straight guys
who were dragged

738
00:31:11,285 --> 00:31:13,557
by the wife or girlfriend?

739
00:31:13,623 --> 00:31:14,391
[ cheering ]

740
00:31:14,458 --> 00:31:16,428
Yes! I know. I'm sorry, sir.

741
00:31:16,495 --> 00:31:19,234
I don't speak your language.
I'm sorry. I...

742
00:31:19,301 --> 00:31:20,704
[ laughter ]

743
00:31:20,771 --> 00:31:23,977
I speak fluent gay.
I took two years in high school,

744
00:31:24,044 --> 00:31:26,382
and it just stuck.
‐ [ cheers and applause ]

745
00:31:26,448 --> 00:31:28,787
As I started doing
stand‐up more,

746
00:31:28,854 --> 00:31:31,225
I would see a lot
of other female comedians,

747
00:31:31,291 --> 00:31:32,795
but I have to be honest.

748
00:31:32,862 --> 00:31:36,502
90% of them just aren't even
in the business anymore.

749
00:31:36,569 --> 00:31:38,239
You know, there's all these
ways that we control each other,

750
00:31:38,305 --> 00:31:41,412
and to an extent, we do that
still as women to one another.

751
00:31:41,478 --> 00:31:43,182
It was hard to like
another woman

752
00:31:43,249 --> 00:31:47,023
because you felt threatened
by, you know, only one person

753
00:31:47,090 --> 00:31:49,327
is gonna get the job.

754
00:31:49,394 --> 00:31:52,367
I was bullied by a female comic
really early on,

755
00:31:52,434 --> 00:31:56,341
like, so bad that I had to,
like, kinda leave town,

756
00:31:56,408 --> 00:31:59,381
like, my home club of‐‐
in St. Louis,

757
00:31:59,448 --> 00:32:01,218
and she was so funny,
and I looked up to her so much,

758
00:32:01,285 --> 00:32:03,189
and all I wanted was
her approval.

759
00:32:03,255 --> 00:32:04,625
[ laughter ]

760
00:32:04,692 --> 00:32:09,067
Girls hate each other,
especially during the day.

761
00:32:09,134 --> 00:32:11,573
But when the moon comes up,
and there's white wine involved,

762
00:32:11,639 --> 00:32:14,044
[ nasally voice ] "Oh, my God.
Stacy, you look amazing.

763
00:32:14,111 --> 00:32:16,750
"I love you.
Can I just tell you?

764
00:32:16,816 --> 00:32:18,820
"I love you. I do.
But you know who I hate?

765
00:32:18,887 --> 00:32:20,758
[ deep voice ] Becky."

766
00:32:20,824 --> 00:32:22,828
[ laughter ]

767
00:32:22,895 --> 00:32:24,766
Yeah, the competition thing,
I mean, you know,

768
00:32:24,832 --> 00:32:27,638
we got this one slot.
We need one woman!

769
00:32:27,705 --> 00:32:29,474
Networks, too. I will never
forget pitching a show

770
00:32:29,542 --> 00:32:31,880
to a network
and them saying to me,

771
00:32:31,946 --> 00:32:35,420
"We already have, like,
a blonde funny woman."

772
00:32:35,486 --> 00:32:37,457
And I was just, like,
"Okay, I'll dye my hair red.

773
00:32:37,525 --> 00:32:39,194
Like, what are
you talking about?"

774
00:32:39,261 --> 00:32:48,446
♪♪♪♪♪♪

775
00:32:48,512 --> 00:32:50,918
[ horn honks in distance ]

776
00:32:50,984 --> 00:32:53,389
♪♪♪♪♪♪

777
00:32:53,456 --> 00:32:56,228
You basically go up
five, seven nights a week

778
00:32:56,295 --> 00:33:01,539
for free at anyplace that has
a coffee shop, a laundromat,

779
00:33:01,606 --> 00:33:05,446
a fuckin' noodle place,
whatever, and practice.

780
00:33:05,514 --> 00:33:07,250
The open mics I used to do
in this city,

781
00:33:07,317 --> 00:33:10,490
I worked in a supermarket where
people would be checking out.

782
00:33:10,557 --> 00:33:12,795
And it was like,
"Hey, wow, you got relish."

783
00:33:12,862 --> 00:33:15,266
Like, it was horrible,"
and we didn't get paid,

784
00:33:15,333 --> 00:33:17,905
but we got to have the salad bar
downstairs.

785
00:33:17,972 --> 00:33:21,679
I moved to L. A., and I was like,
"How do I get stage time?"

786
00:33:21,746 --> 00:33:23,717
And I would contact comics
that had shows,

787
00:33:23,784 --> 00:33:25,788
and I'd be like,
"Can I make your flyers?

788
00:33:25,854 --> 00:33:27,257
Can I jump on?"

789
00:33:27,323 --> 00:33:28,459
Did you guys see this?

790
00:33:28,527 --> 00:33:29,862
Oh, I didn't know
it was gonna be a thing.

791
00:33:29,929 --> 00:33:33,937
How you guys doing?
That's weird. Okay.

792
00:33:34,004 --> 00:33:35,339
Got off work at, like, 6,
and I'd wait till, like, 8,

793
00:33:35,406 --> 00:33:37,243
and I'd go to the bar and I'd
eat my sad chicken finger dinner

794
00:33:37,310 --> 00:33:39,949
and I'd wait for my spot,
which was at, like, 9:30.

795
00:33:40,016 --> 00:33:41,553
And then you'd go get
another one,

796
00:33:41,619 --> 00:33:43,489
and then you would just
cobble together

797
00:33:43,557 --> 00:33:44,859
any spots you could get.

798
00:33:44,926 --> 00:33:47,531
You'd drive to Santa Barbara
on a work night,

799
00:33:47,598 --> 00:33:49,735
because someone would give you
20 minutes.

800
00:33:49,802 --> 00:33:53,476
Just kind of figuring it out
without realizing

801
00:33:53,543 --> 00:33:56,248
what the limitations could be

802
00:33:56,315 --> 00:33:58,753
or anything like that.
Just going.

803
00:33:58,820 --> 00:34:02,427
When I came up, if you weren't
performing every night,

804
00:34:02,494 --> 00:34:04,030
then you weren't serious
about it.

805
00:34:04,097 --> 00:34:07,938
You were always told,
"There's no excuse.

806
00:34:08,005 --> 00:34:11,445
"Do not use being Black
as an excuse.

807
00:34:11,512 --> 00:34:14,084
"Do not use being a woman
as an excuse.

808
00:34:14,150 --> 00:34:16,488
You need to be good at this."

809
00:34:16,556 --> 00:34:18,492
I mean, I do realize
as a Black woman,

810
00:34:18,560 --> 00:34:22,300
which is how I start
every conversation, um...

811
00:34:22,367 --> 00:34:24,104
[ laughter ]

812
00:34:24,170 --> 00:34:26,175
I do realize it is my job
to address what's in the air,

813
00:34:26,241 --> 00:34:28,947
but, um, I have to be honest.
I'm not good at it.

814
00:34:29,014 --> 00:34:30,951
I say things wrong.

815
00:34:31,018 --> 00:34:34,024
Like, I've been messing up
on my pronouns lately,

816
00:34:34,090 --> 00:34:36,930
'cause I met someone who was not
a guy or a girl.

817
00:34:36,996 --> 00:34:40,671
They were a they, which is how
they wanna be referred to,

818
00:34:40,737 --> 00:34:42,473
and that's important.

819
00:34:42,541 --> 00:34:45,213
I care about that.
It's just new to me.

820
00:34:45,279 --> 00:34:48,820
And in a sentence
structurally...

821
00:34:48,887 --> 00:34:52,193
it makes me sound like
a runaway slave.

822
00:34:52,260 --> 00:34:54,999
[ laughter ]

823
00:34:55,066 --> 00:34:56,468
Like, "Where they at?"

824
00:34:56,536 --> 00:34:59,007
[ laughter ]

825
00:34:59,074 --> 00:35:00,309
"They's coming?"

826
00:35:00,376 --> 00:35:05,086
[ laughter ]

827
00:35:05,152 --> 00:35:06,823
"They down by the river?"

828
00:35:06,890 --> 00:35:09,629
[ laughter ]

829
00:35:09,695 --> 00:35:11,398
"They gon' be mad at that joke."

830
00:35:11,465 --> 00:35:13,970
[ laughter ]

831
00:35:14,037 --> 00:35:16,876
Some people are lucky. They find
their voice in, like, 10 years.

832
00:35:16,943 --> 00:35:21,251
But you can't do that unless
you feel comfortable onstage,

833
00:35:21,318 --> 00:35:23,990
and you can't feel comfortable
onstage unless you do it

834
00:35:24,057 --> 00:35:25,426
every fucking night.

835
00:35:25,493 --> 00:35:27,665
Did it feel like
an even playing field

836
00:35:27,731 --> 00:35:30,036
for men and women?
‐ Heck, no. [ laughs ]

837
00:35:30,102 --> 00:35:32,708
An even playing field?
Are you kidding? [ laughs ]

838
00:35:32,775 --> 00:35:34,912
What?! It's not even
an even playing field now.

839
00:35:34,979 --> 00:35:37,785
No, it was never
an even playing field.

840
00:35:37,851 --> 00:35:41,158
It was so hard to get
stage time.

841
00:35:41,224 --> 00:35:42,528
‐ Oh, Lord!
‐ [ laughter ]

842
00:35:42,595 --> 00:35:45,499
As a Black woman,
I had to fight.

843
00:35:45,567 --> 00:35:48,439
I really, really had to fight
for my spots,

844
00:35:48,505 --> 00:35:51,511
and I really, really had
to prove to the comics

845
00:35:51,579 --> 00:35:52,848
that I was funny.

846
00:35:52,915 --> 00:35:54,685
I was at a club,
and a guy had come up to me,

847
00:35:54,752 --> 00:35:56,121
and I was coming out
the bathroom.

848
00:35:56,188 --> 00:35:59,060
He said, "Excuse me, sis."
I said, "No, excuse me!"

849
00:35:59,127 --> 00:36:06,542
[ laughter ]

850
00:36:06,609 --> 00:36:08,947
"I make my own money.
I got my thing goin'.

851
00:36:09,014 --> 00:36:10,349
"I don't need you to tell me
what to do.

852
00:36:10,416 --> 00:36:12,855
"I do my nails. I do my hair.
I got it all covered here.

853
00:36:12,921 --> 00:36:16,963
Now what you want?"
‐ [ laughter ]

854
00:36:17,030 --> 00:36:18,900
He was like,
"I was just gon' tell you

855
00:36:18,967 --> 00:36:21,471
you had some toilet paper
stuck on your shoe."

856
00:36:21,539 --> 00:36:25,012
‐ [ laughter ]
‐ I‐‐Oh. Oh.

857
00:36:25,079 --> 00:36:35,701
♪♪♪♪♪♪

858
00:36:35,767 --> 00:36:37,538
In New York, first of all,

859
00:36:37,604 --> 00:36:39,542
you're lucky if you get
on the schedule,

860
00:36:39,608 --> 00:36:42,881
and then you're gonna get
15 minutes, 10.

861
00:36:42,948 --> 00:36:47,290
On the road, I was getting
30 minutes of stage time

862
00:36:47,357 --> 00:36:49,160
as a feature.

863
00:36:49,227 --> 00:36:50,831
I go to Flint. I'm performing
at this college.

864
00:36:50,897 --> 00:36:52,133
Right before I go onstage,

865
00:36:52,200 --> 00:36:53,636
I go up
to the student body president.

866
00:36:53,703 --> 00:36:55,707
I said, "Look, I just need
to know for my act.

867
00:36:55,774 --> 00:36:58,512
Do you guys have any Jews here?"

868
00:36:58,580 --> 00:37:01,051
She goes, "Juice?
Yeah, we've got, um,

869
00:37:01,118 --> 00:37:03,188
apple juice, grape juice,
and orange juice."

870
00:37:03,255 --> 00:37:08,032
[ laughter ]

871
00:37:11,739 --> 00:37:15,079
This is every hotel key card
that I've used

872
00:37:15,146 --> 00:37:17,417
since around maybe 2010.

873
00:37:17,483 --> 00:37:18,887
I don't use my own name
when I check in.

874
00:37:18,953 --> 00:37:20,991
So a lot of these
have a fake name.

875
00:37:21,058 --> 00:37:24,197
You can kind of, like, uh,
relive your life.

876
00:37:24,264 --> 00:37:28,072
You can demarcate it
by hotel star ratings.

877
00:37:28,138 --> 00:37:31,979
Some of the clubs would buy
condominiums.

878
00:37:32,046 --> 00:37:34,350
Did anyone talk about this?
Oh, my God.

879
00:37:34,417 --> 00:37:35,987
♪♪♪♪♪♪

880
00:37:36,054 --> 00:37:38,593
Welcome to the comedy convo
at the Tampa Improv.

881
00:37:38,660 --> 00:37:40,029
Not actually
at the Tampa Improv.

882
00:37:40,096 --> 00:37:42,668
Kind of a couple blocks
down the street

883
00:37:42,735 --> 00:37:44,872
into a pretty dangerous
neighborhood.

884
00:37:44,939 --> 00:37:46,743
There's no emcee staying
with me.

885
00:37:46,809 --> 00:37:49,715
Um, he actually lives
in this, uh, complex

886
00:37:49,782 --> 00:37:51,586
in another condo.

887
00:37:51,652 --> 00:37:54,525
Here I am,
this sort of sheltered girl.

888
00:37:54,592 --> 00:37:58,031
I'm living with two guys
I don't know for a week.

889
00:37:58,098 --> 00:37:59,935
And you know,
they'd bring home waitresses,

890
00:38:00,002 --> 00:38:02,708
and they'd go‐‐
and I'm sitting there in, like,

891
00:38:02,775 --> 00:38:04,979
in my room with the locked door
reading a book

892
00:38:05,045 --> 00:38:06,682
with, like, you know,
Pauly Shore's cum

893
00:38:06,749 --> 00:38:07,584
on the fucking comforter,
you know?

894
00:38:07,651 --> 00:38:09,287
Ew.

895
00:38:09,354 --> 00:38:13,262
♪♪♪♪♪♪

896
00:38:13,328 --> 00:38:16,769
It's the dues that you
have to pay to sort of get

897
00:38:16,836 --> 00:38:19,542
to where you wanna go.

898
00:38:19,608 --> 00:38:23,415
But it's, like, so sad.
[ laughs ]

899
00:38:23,482 --> 00:38:26,789
You just think,
what if this is my life?

900
00:38:26,856 --> 00:38:28,325
[ scattered laughter ]

901
00:38:28,392 --> 00:38:32,568
I sat down on the couch, and I
started flipping through the TV.

902
00:38:32,634 --> 00:38:34,905
Then I came
upon the Lifetime network.

903
00:38:34,972 --> 00:38:37,410
Now I don't know if you guys
are familiar

904
00:38:37,477 --> 00:38:40,249
with the Lifetime network,
but their slogan is

905
00:38:40,316 --> 00:38:43,188
"Lifetime‐‐
Television for Women."

906
00:38:43,255 --> 00:38:46,729
Now if you were to watch some
of these Lifetime movies,

907
00:38:46,796 --> 00:38:49,668
they are most famous for,
you would notice

908
00:38:49,735 --> 00:38:53,342
they often involve a woman
being murdered,

909
00:38:53,408 --> 00:38:56,649
kidnapped, beaten,
maimed, hoodwinked.

910
00:38:56,716 --> 00:38:58,553
You know, girl stuff.

911
00:38:58,620 --> 00:39:01,859
[ laughter ]

912
00:39:06,368 --> 00:39:08,038
Usually when we're comedians
on the road,

913
00:39:08,105 --> 00:39:09,507
like, they don't give a shit
about us.

914
00:39:09,575 --> 00:39:11,178
They'll just send
any sex offender

915
00:39:11,244 --> 00:39:13,783
to get us from the airport.
‐ [ laughter ]

916
00:39:13,850 --> 00:39:15,987
I was in Alabama,
and they sent this man.

917
00:39:16,054 --> 00:39:17,758
You know when you meet someone
and just right away,

918
00:39:17,825 --> 00:39:19,695
you're like,
"Whoa, you're crazy."

919
00:39:19,762 --> 00:39:23,468
Like, I could feel him
crackling with insanity.

920
00:39:23,536 --> 00:39:25,406
‐ [ laughter ]
‐ Humming with madness.

921
00:39:25,473 --> 00:39:28,011
I got into his car. This is
the first thing he said to me.

922
00:39:28,078 --> 00:39:29,815
This is what he opened with.
He just goes...

923
00:39:29,882 --> 00:39:31,485
[ imitates Southern accent ]
"You is the first Jewish

924
00:39:31,552 --> 00:39:33,556
that I had ever met in my life."

925
00:39:33,623 --> 00:39:34,959
[ laughter ]

926
00:39:35,025 --> 00:39:36,495
[ normal voice ] Which I guess
is better than being

927
00:39:36,562 --> 00:39:38,465
his last Jewish. I'm not sure.

928
00:39:38,533 --> 00:39:40,804
[ laughter ]

929
00:39:40,871 --> 00:39:45,881
♪♪♪♪♪♪

930
00:39:45,947 --> 00:39:47,684
It's tricky because
when somebody asks you

931
00:39:47,751 --> 00:39:49,387
to go on the road,
you don't always know.

932
00:39:49,454 --> 00:39:52,093
You don't know why. Does this
guy really respect my act,

933
00:39:52,159 --> 00:39:55,032
or is he gonna be
just strange and gross

934
00:39:55,099 --> 00:39:57,538
and lascivious all weekend?

935
00:39:57,604 --> 00:39:59,708
They don't know the feeling.
They don't know what it's like

936
00:39:59,775 --> 00:40:02,781
to physically not be as big
as someone

937
00:40:02,848 --> 00:40:04,685
and know that no matter
how much smarter

938
00:40:04,752 --> 00:40:06,087
or funnier you are,
at the end of the day,

939
00:40:06,154 --> 00:40:07,824
if that person wants
to hurt you, then can.

940
00:40:07,891 --> 00:40:10,564
I've had a fan follow me
to my hotel room before

941
00:40:10,630 --> 00:40:13,770
and somehow know my room.
I don't know how he did,

942
00:40:13,836 --> 00:40:15,272
but banging on the door
all night.

943
00:40:15,339 --> 00:40:17,376
I had to call the cops.
It's like, you know,

944
00:40:17,443 --> 00:40:19,080
you're a little bit like, ugh.

945
00:40:19,147 --> 00:40:21,886
You know, of course it was‐‐
I got harassed.

946
00:40:21,953 --> 00:40:23,422
Someone grabbed my boob.

947
00:40:23,488 --> 00:40:25,159
It's happened so many times
where guys casually

948
00:40:25,226 --> 00:40:27,363
just put their hand on my ass
when they're taking a picture.

949
00:40:27,430 --> 00:40:28,533
‐ Right.
‐ And it's‐‐

950
00:40:28,600 --> 00:40:30,537
and no one ever sees it.
I'll have security guards,

951
00:40:30,604 --> 00:40:32,206
like, watching,
and I'll be like,

952
00:40:32,273 --> 00:40:33,710
"Will you just watch for men
touching me in weird places?"

953
00:40:33,776 --> 00:40:35,012
'Cause it's always weird
for me to call out

954
00:40:35,079 --> 00:40:36,649
'cause it's, like,
in front of their wife.

955
00:40:36,716 --> 00:40:37,751
‐ Right.
‐ And I don't wanna

956
00:40:37,818 --> 00:40:38,786
embarrass them
and make it a thing.

957
00:40:38,853 --> 00:40:41,559
I had a guy lick me one time.

958
00:40:41,626 --> 00:40:43,696
And from that point on,
I was like,

959
00:40:43,763 --> 00:40:45,065
there will always be
a security guard.

960
00:40:45,132 --> 00:40:48,940
I've had male comics
follow me in the bathroom

961
00:40:49,007 --> 00:40:51,278
and push open the bathroom stall
before.

962
00:40:51,344 --> 00:40:53,716
I mean, there's‐‐
it goes on and on.

963
00:40:53,783 --> 00:40:56,154
I was working with somebody
on the road,

964
00:40:56,221 --> 00:40:59,427
and he locked me
in the dressing room,

965
00:40:59,494 --> 00:41:03,302
and he came for me.

966
00:41:03,368 --> 00:41:05,139
But he was half my size.

967
00:41:05,205 --> 00:41:07,209
That's really stupid
and insulting

968
00:41:07,276 --> 00:41:12,588
when somebody tries to rape you
and they're half your size.

969
00:41:12,654 --> 00:41:18,933
I've been in so many situations.
I was assaulted by a comic.

970
00:41:19,000 --> 00:41:23,610
It's‐‐It's rough.

971
00:41:23,676 --> 00:41:25,312
You know?

972
00:41:25,379 --> 00:41:29,087
♪♪♪♪♪♪

973
00:41:29,153 --> 00:41:31,324
You gotta be careful.
There are crazy people out there.

974
00:41:31,391 --> 00:41:34,330
You know, I'm sure that's true
for men, too,

975
00:41:34,397 --> 00:41:37,503
but not as much.

976
00:41:42,614 --> 00:41:44,250
And you told me‐‐

977
00:41:44,317 --> 00:41:46,922
[ laughs ]

978
00:42:27,236 --> 00:42:29,307
[ laughs ]

979
00:42:31,779 --> 00:42:33,549
No, that's funny...

980
00:42:40,429 --> 00:42:42,500
Women have so much more
to worry about, huh?

981
00:42:42,567 --> 00:42:44,337
This summer I'm walking
with my boyfriend.

982
00:42:44,404 --> 00:42:46,876
He says to me,
"Gee, it's a beautiful night."

983
00:42:46,942 --> 00:42:49,848
Let's go down by the river."

984
00:42:49,915 --> 00:42:52,721
[ laughs ] I said,
"What are you, nuts?

985
00:42:52,788 --> 00:42:55,259
"I'm not going down
by the river. It's midnight.

986
00:42:55,325 --> 00:42:58,065
"I'm wearing jewelry.
I'm carrying money.

987
00:42:58,131 --> 00:43:00,603
I have a vagina with me."

988
00:43:00,670 --> 00:43:02,674
[ laughter ]

989
00:43:02,741 --> 00:43:05,547
[ cheers, applause,
and whistles ]

990
00:43:05,613 --> 00:43:08,018
Wouldn't it be great
if you would just leave

991
00:43:08,085 --> 00:43:11,157
your pussy at home sometimes?
‐ [ laughter ]

992
00:43:11,224 --> 00:43:12,828
Just think of the freedom
that you will have.

993
00:43:12,894 --> 00:43:14,363
You'd get home from work.

994
00:43:14,430 --> 00:43:16,034
It's getting
a little dark outside.

995
00:43:16,101 --> 00:43:18,171
You're like, ooh, I would like
to go for a jog, but...

996
00:43:18,238 --> 00:43:19,541
[ clicks teeth ]
it's getting too dark.

997
00:43:19,608 --> 00:43:21,478
Oh, I'll just leave it at home.

998
00:43:21,545 --> 00:43:22,581
And you..

999
00:43:22,647 --> 00:43:24,083
[ laughter ]

1000
00:43:24,150 --> 00:43:26,689
And you're out jogging.
Yeah, it could be pitch‐black.

1001
00:43:26,756 --> 00:43:30,195
You still out there,
just jogging, enjoying yourself.

1002
00:43:30,262 --> 00:43:32,500
You know, if some crazy guy
just jumps out the bushes,

1003
00:43:32,567 --> 00:43:36,341
like, "Ahh!" You're like,
Oh! I left it at home."

1004
00:43:36,408 --> 00:43:37,544
[ laughter ]

1005
00:43:37,611 --> 00:43:40,416
[ cheers and applause ]

1006
00:43:40,482 --> 00:43:43,689
I didn't wanna fuck
any of the guys.

1007
00:43:43,756 --> 00:43:45,259
I hung out with them.

1008
00:43:45,325 --> 00:43:47,496
I heard every fucking shit
they said about women

1009
00:43:47,564 --> 00:43:50,570
and minorities and Jews
and gay‐‐you know.

1010
00:43:50,637 --> 00:43:52,306
And I was like, okay, great.
Whatever.

1011
00:43:52,373 --> 00:43:56,582
I just wanted to be good
at my craft.

1012
00:43:56,649 --> 00:44:02,426
I didn't let them or anything
get in the way.

1013
00:44:02,493 --> 00:44:13,448
♪♪♪♪♪♪

1014
00:44:13,516 --> 00:44:16,789
‐ How was it?
‐ Ugh. I don't know.

1015
00:44:16,856 --> 00:44:17,924
I'm‐‐I've been on the road.
I don't know what's happening.

1016
00:44:17,991 --> 00:44:19,393
Where‐‐Where have you been?

1017
00:44:19,460 --> 00:44:22,834
‐ I was on, uh, I was at Acme.
‐ Oh, I love Acme.

1018
00:44:22,901 --> 00:44:24,036
I love Acme, too.
It was great.

1019
00:44:24,103 --> 00:44:25,573
I saw your name on the‐‐
on the thing.

1020
00:44:25,640 --> 00:44:26,809
‐ Oh, on the list?
‐ Yeah, yeah.

1021
00:44:26,876 --> 00:44:28,245
On the thing
on the dressing room?

1022
00:44:28,311 --> 00:44:30,583
Yeah. It was fun. Um, but I
just feel disconnected.

1023
00:44:30,650 --> 00:44:32,386
Whenever I come back,
I'm like, exhausted.

1024
00:44:32,453 --> 00:44:34,758
Oh, I know.
You gotta take Sunday off.

1025
00:44:34,825 --> 00:44:36,127
Like, you gotta enjoy the work.

1026
00:44:36,194 --> 00:44:37,196
‐ Yeah.
‐ You know what I mean?

1027
00:44:37,263 --> 00:44:40,435
‐ Yeah.
‐ And you‐‐you wouldn't be

1028
00:44:40,502 --> 00:44:42,674
on the stage if you
didn't deserve to be.

1029
00:44:42,741 --> 00:44:45,780
Yeah. I gotta remember that.
I didn't trick anybody.

1030
00:44:45,847 --> 00:44:48,553
‐ Right. You're not a fraud.
‐ [ laughs ] Yeah.

1031
00:44:48,619 --> 00:44:51,457
You got in here, and you‐‐
do you think the guys, ever,

1032
00:44:51,525 --> 00:44:52,761
when they get in here,
are, like...

1033
00:44:52,828 --> 00:44:54,565
‐ No.
‐ Never.

1034
00:44:54,631 --> 00:44:55,867
You earned that time.
It's your time.

1035
00:44:55,934 --> 00:44:57,537
‐ Yeah.
‐ Don't‐‐

1036
00:44:57,604 --> 00:44:59,641
Don't let them in your head.
It's a process.

1037
00:44:59,708 --> 00:45:00,810
Thank you.

1038
00:45:00,877 --> 00:45:02,046
How long have you been
doing it?

1039
00:45:02,112 --> 00:45:03,583
I appreciate that so much.

1040
00:45:03,649 --> 00:45:05,520
Confidence is only a question
that we only ask women about

1041
00:45:05,587 --> 00:45:09,327
because it's just a given
that men will have it.

1042
00:45:09,393 --> 00:45:11,632
We're always telling unconfident
women to be confident,

1043
00:45:11,699 --> 00:45:13,301
and then when
they get confident,

1044
00:45:13,368 --> 00:45:14,638
we're like, "Why are you
so confident? Tone it down.

1045
00:45:14,705 --> 00:45:16,441
"That's making us feel
less confident.

1046
00:45:16,508 --> 00:45:18,613
Okay. Oh, let's build you
back up, knock you back down."

1047
00:45:18,679 --> 00:45:21,251
We have an obsession
with monitoring

1048
00:45:21,317 --> 00:45:24,123
women's confidence
and their hubris.

1049
00:45:24,190 --> 00:45:25,994
I truly believe
our society operates

1050
00:45:26,060 --> 00:45:28,164
on a currency
of women's insecurities.

1051
00:45:28,231 --> 00:45:29,601
Multibillion‐dollar industries
thriving on, like,

1052
00:45:29,668 --> 00:45:32,139
"Just make them feel like
their bodies are unacceptable

1053
00:45:32,206 --> 00:45:34,477
and then, like,
sell them some shit."

1054
00:45:34,545 --> 00:45:36,247
Look at any magazine.
"Like, you're amazing,

1055
00:45:36,314 --> 00:45:38,886
"but you need to lose,
like, 10 pounds.

1056
00:45:38,953 --> 00:45:40,088
"Love your body. Love your hair.
Whatever you've done is wrong.

1057
00:45:40,155 --> 00:45:41,992
You look like a sea monster."

1058
00:45:42,059 --> 00:45:43,428
[ laughter ]

1059
00:45:43,495 --> 00:45:45,065
Everything's got, like,
a weird mixed message

1060
00:45:45,132 --> 00:45:47,169
and a weird, like,
whore‐y undertone.

1061
00:45:47,236 --> 00:45:48,471
Like, "Be a bad girl.
Own your sexuality,

1062
00:45:48,539 --> 00:45:49,541
but if you fuck more than
one dude, you're a whore."

1063
00:45:49,608 --> 00:45:52,614
Like, everything's wrong.
‐ [ laughter ]

1064
00:45:52,681 --> 00:45:53,583
It's not easy. It's not.

1065
00:45:53,649 --> 00:45:55,954
And men and women
are different, you know?

1066
00:45:56,020 --> 00:45:58,024
Do you ever notice, like, women,
whenever we look in the mirror,

1067
00:45:58,091 --> 00:46:00,897
we're insecure,
we judge ourselves?

1068
00:46:00,964 --> 00:46:02,701
Or just we tear ourselves
apart.

1069
00:46:02,767 --> 00:46:04,437
Just, "Look at me. Look."

1070
00:46:04,503 --> 00:46:06,040
Like, even if you're stunning,
look at my eyes.

1071
00:46:06,107 --> 00:46:10,650
They're like a different shape.
I'm so‐‐Ugh, I hate my hair.

1072
00:46:10,717 --> 00:46:11,752
So unattractive.

1073
00:46:11,819 --> 00:46:14,090
This is how most men
look in the mirror,

1074
00:46:14,156 --> 00:46:16,127
no matter how
horribly unattractive they are.

1075
00:46:16,194 --> 00:46:25,780
[ laughter and applause ]

1076
00:46:25,847 --> 00:46:28,552
I'm fucking hot.

1077
00:46:28,619 --> 00:46:30,523
[ laughter ]

1078
00:46:34,297 --> 00:46:36,434
I know I'm smart.
I know I'm funny.

1079
00:46:36,501 --> 00:46:39,240
I don't question those things.
I do question that I'm pretty.

1080
00:46:39,307 --> 00:46:43,048
And it's so stupid.
It's so stupid to say.

1081
00:46:43,114 --> 00:46:45,252
Um, and it's so sad.

1082
00:46:45,319 --> 00:46:48,291
I know. I wish I could just
accept myself,

1083
00:46:48,358 --> 00:46:53,068
but, um, I was, uh,
I just have really low self‐esteem

1084
00:46:53,134 --> 00:46:57,376
because I was born a woman,
and so, um,

1085
00:46:57,443 --> 00:47:00,082
maybe I was born with it.
Maybe it's Maybelline.

1086
00:47:00,148 --> 00:47:03,188
‐ It'll just be...
‐ Yeah, that's good.

1087
00:47:03,254 --> 00:47:05,560
It's so much easier to be a man.

1088
00:47:05,627 --> 00:47:08,666
I mean, you get it.
You're, like, you see‐‐

1089
00:47:08,733 --> 00:47:12,439
you work with all‐‐
like, mostly men on camera.

1090
00:47:12,506 --> 00:47:15,245
You see what work goes into them
being on camera versus‐‐

1091
00:47:15,312 --> 00:47:16,447
As we sit here
in hair and makeup?

1092
00:47:16,515 --> 00:47:18,018
‐ Yeah.
‐ Yeah, I get it.

1093
00:47:18,084 --> 00:47:20,322
Grateful for you
and what you do,

1094
00:47:20,389 --> 00:47:22,861
but, you know,
ultimately resent it.

1095
00:47:22,927 --> 00:47:24,430
‐ Um...
‐ You are just fed

1096
00:47:24,497 --> 00:47:30,108
from the day‐‐at least I was
from day one, that looks matter.

1097
00:47:30,175 --> 00:47:31,344
Photo shoots
send me into depressions.

1098
00:47:31,411 --> 00:47:33,683
Anything that makes me
focus on my vanity‐‐

1099
00:47:33,749 --> 00:47:37,356
that's what really make me
have anxiety.

1100
00:47:37,423 --> 00:47:39,895
My dad used to tell me
I was so beautiful,

1101
00:47:39,961 --> 00:47:41,532
and I was an ugly child.

1102
00:47:41,598 --> 00:47:42,567
Like, I legit was.
I was diagnosed as one

1103
00:47:42,634 --> 00:47:44,170
at the age of 11
by a caricature artist

1104
00:47:44,236 --> 00:47:46,507
at a Six Flags.

1105
00:47:46,575 --> 00:47:48,679
‐ [ laughter ]
‐ So I have the documentation.

1106
00:47:48,746 --> 00:47:50,148
♪♪♪♪♪♪

1107
00:47:50,215 --> 00:47:52,186
Men look for looks.
Remember that.

1108
00:47:52,252 --> 00:47:54,624
Don't waste your time
learning to read a book.

1109
00:47:54,691 --> 00:47:56,361
[ laughter ]

1110
00:47:56,427 --> 00:47:58,899
I wanna congratulate you. You've
taken off a lot of weight.

1111
00:47:58,966 --> 00:47:59,801
‐ Yeah.
‐ Your hair's different.

1112
00:47:59,868 --> 00:48:02,807
Everything about you
is different.

1113
00:48:02,874 --> 00:48:04,210
♪♪♪♪♪♪

1114
00:48:04,276 --> 00:48:06,180
A lot of really established
comedians‐‐men‐‐

1115
00:48:06,247 --> 00:48:09,020
would say,
"Don't be so pretty.

1116
00:48:09,086 --> 00:48:10,590
"You can't be too pretty.
You can't be too pretty,

1117
00:48:10,656 --> 00:48:12,026
because they're gonna be mad."

1118
00:48:12,092 --> 00:48:14,030
♪♪♪♪♪♪

1119
00:48:14,096 --> 00:48:16,869
"The women will be jealous
because you're so beautiful.

1120
00:48:16,935 --> 00:48:18,505
"The men will just wanna
have sex with you,

1121
00:48:18,572 --> 00:48:22,046
so don't be too pretty.
A beautiful women is a threat."

1122
00:48:22,112 --> 00:48:23,783
♪♪♪♪♪♪

1123
00:48:23,849 --> 00:48:27,757
If you see any patches
of archaic sadness,

1124
00:48:27,824 --> 00:48:29,661
just blot them.

1125
00:48:29,728 --> 00:48:34,738
Just keep plastering
this lie on me.

1126
00:48:34,805 --> 00:48:37,476
Yeah, have some, like,
little dickhead in my head

1127
00:48:37,544 --> 00:48:41,317
that's like, "Hey, you look fat
in that shot."

1128
00:48:41,384 --> 00:48:42,620
So I wish I didn't have
those thoughts.

1129
00:48:42,687 --> 00:48:46,829
All I do is just bat them away
as much as I can.

1130
00:48:46,895 --> 00:48:49,634
You're smart. You're funny.
You're just a little insecure.

1131
00:48:49,701 --> 00:48:51,204
That's all.

1132
00:48:51,270 --> 00:48:52,974
♪♪♪♪♪♪

1133
00:48:53,041 --> 00:48:54,477
My mom was a girly girl,

1134
00:48:54,544 --> 00:48:56,515
so she wanted me
to dress more feminine,

1135
00:48:56,582 --> 00:49:00,455
so she started shopping for me,
and for some reason,

1136
00:49:00,523 --> 00:49:03,228
she started putting me
in these power suits.

1137
00:49:03,294 --> 00:49:04,998
[ laughter ]

1138
00:49:05,065 --> 00:49:10,342
Yeah, like a pantsuit, which is
just an older version of gay.

1139
00:49:10,409 --> 00:49:13,749
I looked like
a 50‐year‐old woman lawyer,

1140
00:49:13,816 --> 00:49:16,755
just going to court
in my power suit.

1141
00:49:16,822 --> 00:49:21,264
Like, who's ready to litigate,
ladies?

1142
00:49:21,330 --> 00:49:23,702
[ laughter ]

1143
00:49:23,769 --> 00:49:25,305
Of course I'm gonna get
called fat.

1144
00:49:25,372 --> 00:49:28,879
I'm gonna get called a dude.
I'm gonna get called whatever.

1145
00:49:28,946 --> 00:49:32,754
You just kinda go, "Huh, okay,"
and move on.

1146
00:49:32,821 --> 00:49:34,558
But I don't understand
shoulder pads.

1147
00:49:34,624 --> 00:49:36,360
Were people just like,

1148
00:49:36,427 --> 00:49:38,465
"Oh, your shoulders
hadn't come in yet.

1149
00:49:38,532 --> 00:49:41,170
Let's get you some pads"?

1150
00:49:41,237 --> 00:49:43,475
But I'm never gonna be like,

1151
00:49:43,542 --> 00:49:46,982
"Oh, God, I felt so fat
up there."

1152
00:49:47,049 --> 00:49:48,853
[ blows raspberry ] Who cares?

1153
00:49:48,919 --> 00:49:52,192
I have achieved more peace
in my body as I've gotten older,

1154
00:49:52,259 --> 00:49:55,298
but it took a long time
to get there.

1155
00:49:55,365 --> 00:49:57,269
Once upon a time,
I had my own TV show

1156
00:49:57,336 --> 00:49:59,473
called "All‐American Girl."

1157
00:49:59,541 --> 00:50:03,448
[ cheers and applause ]

1158
00:50:03,516 --> 00:50:06,622
I got a phone call
from the producer of the show

1159
00:50:06,688 --> 00:50:10,763
that, "The network is concerned.

1160
00:50:10,830 --> 00:50:13,869
"They think that
you're really overweight,

1161
00:50:13,936 --> 00:50:15,740
"and you're gonna have to do
something about it.

1162
00:50:15,807 --> 00:50:19,246
"If you wanna be a star,
if you wanna have a show,

1163
00:50:19,313 --> 00:50:21,083
you're gonna have to do
something."

1164
00:50:21,150 --> 00:50:22,821
I wanted to be a success
at this,

1165
00:50:22,887 --> 00:50:24,724
and I‐I was just willing to do
whatever,

1166
00:50:24,791 --> 00:50:27,296
and if that meant don't eat,
don't eat,

1167
00:50:27,362 --> 00:50:29,400
I just was fine with that.

1168
00:50:29,466 --> 00:50:31,805
I lost 30 pounds in 2 weeks.

1169
00:50:31,872 --> 00:50:33,041
[ audience gasps ]

1170
00:50:33,107 --> 00:50:36,214
And my kidneys collapsed.

1171
00:50:36,280 --> 00:50:37,550
It happened on the set
of the show.

1172
00:50:37,617 --> 00:50:40,690
I guess the network had decided
that my face

1173
00:50:40,756 --> 00:50:45,031
could now fit on the screen.

1174
00:50:45,098 --> 00:50:49,106
The first episode was
about my character,

1175
00:50:49,173 --> 00:50:50,509
and I do stand‐up comedy

1176
00:50:50,576 --> 00:50:53,816
and publicly embarrass
my family.

1177
00:50:53,883 --> 00:50:56,955
So at the end of the episode,
I learned my lesson,

1178
00:50:57,022 --> 00:50:58,258
I go back onstage,

1179
00:50:58,324 --> 00:51:04,704
and I vow never to publicly
embarrass my family again.

1180
00:51:04,771 --> 00:51:07,577
Quentin Tarantino,
who I was dating at the time,

1181
00:51:07,644 --> 00:51:10,315
called me up straightaway.

1182
00:51:10,382 --> 00:51:12,252
"What the fuck was that?"

1183
00:51:12,319 --> 00:51:13,756
[ laughter ]

1184
00:51:13,822 --> 00:51:16,227
"That is so fucking wrong!
I can't believe you!

1185
00:51:16,294 --> 00:51:20,101
You fucking live to publicly
embarrass your family."

1186
00:51:20,168 --> 00:51:22,974
[ laughter ]

1187
00:51:23,041 --> 00:51:27,115
"What's wrong with you?
They took away your voice.

1188
00:51:27,182 --> 00:51:28,351
"Don't let them do that.

1189
00:51:28,418 --> 00:51:32,794
Don't let them take away
your voice!"

1190
00:51:32,860 --> 00:51:36,067
I didn't get it.

1191
00:51:36,133 --> 00:51:40,075
I was like, "But I'm a size 4."

1192
00:51:40,141 --> 00:51:45,085
[ laughter ]

1193
00:51:45,151 --> 00:51:51,430
All those years of too tall,
too loud, too Jewish, too gay‐‐

1194
00:51:51,497 --> 00:51:54,804
it took me so long to realize
I am angry.

1195
00:51:54,871 --> 00:51:56,407
<i>‐ No one's funnier than us.</i>
<i>‐ No one!</i>

1196
00:51:56,474 --> 00:51:58,879
‐ Kathy Griffin.
‐ Sarah Silverman.

1197
00:51:58,946 --> 00:51:59,714
BOTH: Fuck you!

1198
00:51:59,781 --> 00:52:01,050
But a woman can't be angry,

1199
00:52:01,117 --> 00:52:04,524
'cause if she's angry,
she's mentally ill.

1200
00:52:04,591 --> 00:52:07,129
She's hysterical.
She's a bitch.

1201
00:52:07,195 --> 00:52:09,433
Or diva or nag.

1202
00:52:09,500 --> 00:52:11,672
Difficult, bitchy,
hard to work with.

1203
00:52:11,738 --> 00:52:12,907
When women, like, go crazy,

1204
00:52:12,974 --> 00:52:14,544
it's because people chip away
at you,

1205
00:52:14,611 --> 00:52:18,318
and then you snap,
and it's like, see? Crazy.

1206
00:52:18,384 --> 00:52:19,955
If someone's crazy,

1207
00:52:20,021 --> 00:52:21,424
of course you don't have
to listen to them

1208
00:52:21,490 --> 00:52:23,428
or heed their warnings
or take them seriously.

1209
00:52:23,494 --> 00:52:24,831
You write 'em off.

1210
00:52:24,898 --> 00:52:27,637
Male comics are often
really, really celebrated

1211
00:52:27,704 --> 00:52:29,641
for their very famous anger.

1212
00:52:29,708 --> 00:52:32,245
You fucking bitch!
How do you live with yourself?!

1213
00:52:32,312 --> 00:52:34,651
You piece of shit!

1214
00:52:34,718 --> 00:52:36,454
Yeah, you‐‐
Yeah, you fucking cunt!

1215
00:52:36,521 --> 00:52:38,257
You fucking bitch!

1216
00:52:38,324 --> 00:52:40,930
That gives me carte blanche!

1217
00:52:44,069 --> 00:52:46,474
Shut up! I'll let go
when you shut up.

1218
00:52:46,541 --> 00:52:48,979
Girl, I'll shake this weave
out your hair.

1219
00:52:49,046 --> 00:52:53,856
I don't give a fuck.
Shut up! Shut the fuck up!

1220
00:52:53,922 --> 00:52:57,162
Talking about hitting women,
sweetheart.

1221
00:52:57,229 --> 00:52:59,934
And I think you just added
another reason.

1222
00:53:00,001 --> 00:53:02,940
We're not allowed to show that
we're angry, even though we are.

1223
00:53:03,007 --> 00:53:06,180
Women are filled with rage,
but we have to keep a smile

1224
00:53:06,247 --> 00:53:08,819
and not show it because
of wrinkles and likeability.

1225
00:53:08,886 --> 00:53:12,660
So we shove it down.
Shove it down.

1226
00:53:12,727 --> 00:53:15,866
But it comes out.
It finds a way like water.

1227
00:53:18,037 --> 00:53:21,243
It was always very hard
to talk about trauma in comedy

1228
00:53:21,310 --> 00:53:26,120
because audiences don't want
the dailyness of tragedy

1229
00:53:26,187 --> 00:53:29,126
to encroach upon
when they are laughing.

1230
00:53:29,193 --> 00:53:30,796
And I find it
really interesting that

1231
00:53:30,863 --> 00:53:34,503
this is becoming‐‐that‐‐that
kind of admission of trauma

1232
00:53:34,571 --> 00:53:38,177
is part of comedy's venue
these days.

1233
00:53:38,244 --> 00:53:41,083
Yeah, and nowadays,
it's become really a testament

1234
00:53:41,150 --> 00:53:45,225
to comedians' skill to use that
suffering in a way as, like,

1235
00:53:45,291 --> 00:53:48,464
almost like colors that
you would paint with, you know?

1236
00:53:48,532 --> 00:53:52,005
Like, to use all of that
darkness to, um,

1237
00:53:52,072 --> 00:53:54,510
I guess contrast
to the lightness.

1238
00:53:54,577 --> 00:54:05,666
♪♪♪♪♪♪

1239
00:54:05,733 --> 00:54:14,116
[ indistinct conversations,
laughter ]

1240
00:54:14,183 --> 00:54:15,619
Well...

1241
00:54:18,458 --> 00:54:21,130
‐ It's an 8‐minute.
‐ What are you gonna talk about?

1242
00:54:21,197 --> 00:54:23,067
How I was diagnosed
with breast cancer.

1243
00:54:23,134 --> 00:54:25,573
‐ What?
‐ Aw.

1244
00:54:25,639 --> 00:54:27,509
I don't remember anything
about this.

1245
00:54:27,577 --> 00:54:29,614
‐ Mwah.
‐ Yeah, but I'm gonna be fine.

1246
00:54:29,681 --> 00:54:31,551
But you're gonna talk about it
onstage?

1247
00:54:31,618 --> 00:54:33,154
You're gonna be fine.

1248
00:54:33,221 --> 00:54:35,893
That is so brave you can talk
about it onstage.

1249
00:54:35,960 --> 00:54:37,195
I love that. What'd you say?
To be‐‐

1250
00:54:37,262 --> 00:54:39,066
So brave! She gets to talk
about it onstage.

1251
00:54:39,133 --> 00:54:40,703
Most people who get
breast cancer

1252
00:54:40,770 --> 00:54:44,510
have to, like, live with it
in the torture inside.

1253
00:54:44,577 --> 00:54:46,848
‐ You get to...
‐ Marina...

1254
00:54:50,054 --> 00:54:52,527
‐ [ laughter ]
‐ I know. What?

1255
00:54:52,593 --> 00:54:54,531
‐ All right. Here we go.
‐ Have fun.

1256
00:54:54,597 --> 00:54:56,568
Let's see if‐‐
if it doesn't work‐‐

1257
00:54:56,635 --> 00:54:59,173
[ laughter ]

1258
00:54:59,239 --> 00:55:00,709
Oh, Judy.

1259
00:55:00,776 --> 00:55:03,682
What would I do without you?

1260
00:55:03,749 --> 00:55:05,853
Hard to do in an 8‐minute set,
though.

1261
00:55:05,920 --> 00:55:10,195
Like, "I have breast cancer,"
and I'm out.

1262
00:55:10,261 --> 00:55:11,631
‐ Bye.
‐ Bye.

1263
00:55:11,698 --> 00:55:13,635
♪♪♪♪♪♪

1264
00:55:20,583 --> 00:55:26,393
When I found out my diagnosis,
everything flashed before me,

1265
00:55:26,460 --> 00:55:28,164
and I thought about...

1266
00:55:28,231 --> 00:55:29,868
[ voice breaking ]
when I was in high school,

1267
00:55:29,934 --> 00:55:32,907
what I wanted to be,

1268
00:55:32,974 --> 00:55:35,913
and then I thought
about my career

1269
00:55:35,980 --> 00:55:40,523
and where it was
and where it wasn't.

1270
00:55:40,589 --> 00:55:41,658
and I thought
about all of things

1271
00:55:41,725 --> 00:55:44,631
that I wanted for my life.

1272
00:55:44,697 --> 00:55:48,672
By the time I got
to the comedy club,

1273
00:55:48,739 --> 00:55:51,277
tears were gone.

1274
00:55:51,343 --> 00:55:52,914
I was calm.

1275
00:55:52,980 --> 00:55:55,719
[ singsongy ] Marina Franklin!

1276
00:55:55,786 --> 00:55:57,322
Oh, yeah!

1277
00:55:57,389 --> 00:56:01,631
[ cheers and applause ]

1278
00:56:01,698 --> 00:56:03,167
Not getting a hug. That's okay.

1279
00:56:03,234 --> 00:56:05,238
These guys these days,
you know...

1280
00:56:05,305 --> 00:56:06,708
‐ [ laughter ]
‐ They‐‐They're so‐‐

1281
00:56:06,775 --> 00:56:07,777
It's all right.
It works for my act,

1282
00:56:07,844 --> 00:56:09,213
so that's fine.
‐ [ laughter ]

1283
00:56:09,279 --> 00:56:12,018
No, 'cause they're not
giving us hugs.

1284
00:56:12,085 --> 00:56:13,187
It's the Me Too Movement.

1285
00:56:13,254 --> 00:56:14,991
'Cause this is how
they're hugging.

1286
00:56:15,058 --> 00:56:16,160
They're hugging like...Well,
I didn't even get one from him.

1287
00:56:16,227 --> 00:56:17,697
[ laughter ]

1288
00:56:17,763 --> 00:56:19,500
You know,
and I'm hugging like that.

1289
00:56:19,567 --> 00:56:21,070
‐ [ laughter ]
‐ Oh, yeah, no,

1290
00:56:21,136 --> 00:56:23,642
I'll give you a good vag hug.
That's right.

1291
00:56:23,709 --> 00:56:29,353
'Cause I was with this brother,
and he came quick, and, um,

1292
00:56:29,419 --> 00:56:31,457
I was laying there,
and he was asleep,

1293
00:56:31,525 --> 00:56:35,666
and I started feeling myself,
and, uh, and I felt something.

1294
00:56:35,733 --> 00:56:37,202
And this is not the funny part,
actually.

1295
00:56:37,269 --> 00:56:40,008
I don't want you to accidentally
laugh in the unfunny part.

1296
00:56:40,074 --> 00:56:41,076
‐ [ laughter ]
‐ But I have... [ laughs ]

1297
00:56:41,143 --> 00:56:42,713
'Cause I‐‐This is new material.

1298
00:56:42,780 --> 00:56:47,823
But, uh, I had‐‐I had a lump,
and, uh, it was breast cancer.

1299
00:56:47,890 --> 00:56:50,228
But... [ laughs ]
You guys are like, "Oh."

1300
00:56:50,295 --> 00:56:52,265
‐ [ laughter ]
‐ "Where is she going?"

1301
00:56:52,332 --> 00:56:55,338
Uh, the thing is,
is I caught it early,

1302
00:56:55,405 --> 00:56:57,175
so I'm gonna be good, yeah.
Yeah, you can applaud that.

1303
00:56:57,242 --> 00:56:59,413
‐ You can. You can. Yes.
‐ [ cheers and applause ]

1304
00:56:59,479 --> 00:57:00,950
Caught it early.

1305
00:57:01,016 --> 00:57:02,787
[ cheers and applause
continues ]

1306
00:57:02,853 --> 00:57:07,262
'Cause of the bad lay
that I had, apparently.

1307
00:57:07,329 --> 00:57:09,166
If I hadn't had a bad lay...
[ laughs ]

1308
00:57:09,233 --> 00:57:11,470
I would never have caught it
early.

1309
00:57:11,538 --> 00:57:13,040
‐ [ laughter ]
‐ So you guys are actually‐‐

1310
00:57:13,107 --> 00:57:15,511
you don't realize it,
you're providing a service.

1311
00:57:15,579 --> 00:57:17,850
[ laughter ]

1312
00:57:17,917 --> 00:57:20,255
‐ So I guess come quick.
‐ [ laughter ]

1313
00:57:20,321 --> 00:57:23,996
Thank you.
I like that extra laugh.

1314
00:57:24,062 --> 00:57:26,935
Okay. You guys were really good
for me,

1315
00:57:27,002 --> 00:57:29,172
uh, trying this material out.

1316
00:57:29,239 --> 00:57:33,414
Um, I'll say, how do I get
out of cancer material?

1317
00:57:33,481 --> 00:57:34,884
[ laughter ]

1318
00:57:34,951 --> 00:57:37,055
It's not easy, I'm‐a tell you.

1319
00:57:37,122 --> 00:57:38,659
Okay, this is another new one.
Fertility.

1320
00:57:38,725 --> 00:57:43,200
I gotta do fertility stuff.
That's aggressive coming at men,

1321
00:57:43,267 --> 00:57:46,942
'cause I need sperm.
That's kinda creepy.

1322
00:57:47,008 --> 00:57:49,179
Just, "I need your sp‐‐
I don't even need you."

1323
00:57:49,246 --> 00:57:51,116
[ laughter ]
I was like, Louis C. K.

1324
00:57:51,183 --> 00:57:54,022
is actually useful right now.

1325
00:57:54,089 --> 00:57:56,695
‐ [ laughter ]
‐ It's like, "You know that..."

1326
00:57:56,761 --> 00:57:58,130
[ laughter ]

1327
00:57:58,197 --> 00:57:59,299
"You know that thing you do?

1328
00:57:59,366 --> 00:58:01,805
If you could do that into a cup,
please."

1329
00:58:01,871 --> 00:58:06,046
[ laughter ]

1330
00:58:06,113 --> 00:58:09,453
Hey, you guys were amazing.
Thank you so much.

1331
00:58:09,520 --> 00:58:13,595
[ cheers and applause ]

1332
00:58:13,662 --> 00:58:19,306
♪♪♪♪♪♪

1333
00:58:19,373 --> 00:58:21,377
[ exhales deeply ]
I did it.

1334
00:58:21,443 --> 00:58:23,147
I was scared.
I'm not gonna lie.

1335
00:58:23,214 --> 00:58:25,385
I was really scared to share it.

1336
00:58:25,451 --> 00:58:30,729
‐ It worked so good. My God.
‐ Weren't they crazy?

1337
00:58:30,796 --> 00:58:32,432
♪♪♪♪♪♪

1338
00:58:32,499 --> 00:58:34,737
It was so good for me,

1339
00:58:34,804 --> 00:58:37,710
and I could see that I was
actually reaching people.

1340
00:58:37,777 --> 00:58:43,555
♪♪♪♪♪♪

1341
00:58:43,622 --> 00:58:45,559
The things that we're talking
about as comics,

1342
00:58:45,626 --> 00:58:48,965
like, this is your experience
on this planet.

1343
00:58:49,032 --> 00:58:52,138
And comics are here to just
hold up that mirror

1344
00:58:52,205 --> 00:58:54,176
to be, like, "This is us."

1345
00:58:54,242 --> 00:58:57,082
I think it was George Carlin,
you know, who calls us,

1346
00:58:57,148 --> 00:58:58,518
comedians,
modern‐day philosophers.

1347
00:58:58,585 --> 00:59:00,956
We're also whistle‐blowers.

1348
00:59:01,023 --> 00:59:03,528
You're standing up for what
you believe is right,

1349
00:59:03,595 --> 00:59:04,964
and you're calling things out.

1350
00:59:05,031 --> 00:59:08,137
[ cheers and applause ]

1351
00:59:08,204 --> 00:59:09,406
I mean, it's my job
to stand up there alone

1352
00:59:09,473 --> 00:59:13,648
in the dark and tell you
where I see bullshit.

1353
00:59:13,715 --> 00:59:17,556
♪♪♪♪♪♪

1354
00:59:17,623 --> 00:59:18,992
So it should be more straight up
like that?

1355
00:59:19,059 --> 00:59:20,863
‐ No, it's gotta be center.
‐ No, more...

1356
00:59:20,929 --> 00:59:22,933
‐ There you go. Just like that.
‐ I got it.

1357
00:59:23,000 --> 00:59:25,071
<i>It all started when</i>
<i>celebrity photographer</i>

1358
00:59:25,138 --> 00:59:28,210
<i>Tyler Shields released</i>
<i>this video of Griffin</i>

1359
00:59:28,277 --> 00:59:31,885
<i>slowly lifting up what resembles</i>
<i>the head of Donald Trump</i>

1360
00:59:31,951 --> 00:59:33,555
<i>for all to see.</i>

1361
00:59:33,622 --> 00:59:37,630
After she, uh, was photographed
holding up Trump's head,

1362
00:59:37,697 --> 00:59:40,602
there was such a huge backlash.

1363
00:59:40,669 --> 00:59:44,811
When that photo when live
in March 30, 2017,

1364
00:59:44,877 --> 00:59:46,246
I lost everything
within 12 hours.

1365
00:59:46,313 --> 00:59:48,150
I was in the middle
of a 50‐city tour,

1366
00:59:48,217 --> 00:59:50,088
and the last 25 cities
of the tour

1367
00:59:50,154 --> 00:59:51,858
were all canceled.

1368
00:59:51,925 --> 00:59:53,862
A comedian is dealing
with the aftermath

1369
00:59:53,929 --> 00:59:56,634
of what she now describes
as a mistake.

1370
00:59:56,701 --> 00:59:59,206
I'm a comic. I crossed the line.
I moved the line,

1371
00:59:59,272 --> 01:00:02,112
and then I cross it.
I went way too far.

1372
01:00:02,178 --> 01:00:05,284
For the first time in history
that we are aware of,

1373
01:00:05,351 --> 01:00:06,855
the President
of the United States

1374
01:00:06,921 --> 01:00:12,365
and his family is personally
attempting to ruin a comedian.

1375
01:00:12,432 --> 01:00:16,039
It was all so much bullshit.
She got so railroaded.

1376
01:00:16,106 --> 01:00:17,475
You know, I'm sorry,
but Kathy Griffin‐‐

1377
01:00:17,543 --> 01:00:20,516
people‐‐men haven't liked her
for years.

1378
01:00:20,582 --> 01:00:25,291
Many male artists have created
far more disturbing imagery.

1379
01:00:25,358 --> 01:00:27,028
A Marilyn Manson music video

1380
01:00:27,095 --> 01:00:30,134
shows him beheading
a Trump figure.

1381
01:00:30,201 --> 01:00:32,505
The band Municipal Waste
has an image of Trump

1382
01:00:32,573 --> 01:00:35,344
with a bloody gunshot
to his head.

1383
01:00:35,411 --> 01:00:39,554
The band GWAR has had
violent images like this

1384
01:00:39,620 --> 01:00:42,325
for president after president
for years.

1385
01:00:42,392 --> 01:00:45,298
They're all just considered
bad boys.

1386
01:00:45,364 --> 01:00:46,901
They would never treat
a male comedian that way.

1387
01:00:46,968 --> 01:00:48,404
I've never seen that.

1388
01:00:48,471 --> 01:00:51,477
Even male comedians
who threaten gang rape

1389
01:00:51,544 --> 01:00:54,382
don't get that kind of shit.
[ laughs ]

1390
01:00:54,449 --> 01:00:58,023
I am a woman in
a very male‐dominated field.

1391
01:00:58,090 --> 01:00:59,961
And I think it's important
to have

1392
01:01:00,027 --> 01:01:01,998
comics that do
super clean comedy,

1393
01:01:02,065 --> 01:01:03,802
comics that do
political commentary,

1394
01:01:03,869 --> 01:01:05,873
prop comics, all of it.

1395
01:01:05,939 --> 01:01:07,008
You don't have to like me,

1396
01:01:07,075 --> 01:01:08,645
but you shouldn't silence
a comic.

1397
01:01:08,712 --> 01:01:10,883
Joan Rivers would have done
the same thing.

1398
01:01:10,949 --> 01:01:13,655
Kathy, Joan, just fearlessness‐‐

1399
01:01:13,722 --> 01:01:15,191
fearlessness in a way
that I don't have.

1400
01:01:15,258 --> 01:01:17,395
Like, that girl that was onstage

1401
01:01:17,462 --> 01:01:20,301
when Harvey Weinstein
was in the room‐‐

1402
01:01:20,368 --> 01:01:24,409
that was the type of thing
I watched, and I was like,

1403
01:01:24,476 --> 01:01:26,413
I don't know if I could have
done that.

1404
01:01:26,480 --> 01:01:28,284
Harvey Weinstein's trip
to a comedy show

1405
01:01:28,350 --> 01:01:32,158
ends in a Me Too confrontation
that's gone viral.

1406
01:01:32,225 --> 01:01:33,160
<i>He's accused</i>
<i>of sexual misconduct</i>

1407
01:01:33,227 --> 01:01:35,298
<i>by more than 80 women.</i>

1408
01:01:35,364 --> 01:01:37,101
Right before I got onstage,
I was asking

1409
01:01:37,168 --> 01:01:38,872
all the people around me,

1410
01:01:38,939 --> 01:01:40,274
"You know that's
Harvey Weinstein, right?

1411
01:01:40,341 --> 01:01:42,980
"Like, I need to say something.
I'm a comic, like, right?

1412
01:01:43,047 --> 01:01:44,851
I should say something"?

1413
01:01:44,917 --> 01:01:46,521
And a well‐dressed woman

1414
01:01:46,588 --> 01:01:49,493
drinking a martini at the bar
next to me went,

1415
01:01:49,560 --> 01:01:54,469
"No, don't say anything.
Are you kidding? Like, no."

1416
01:01:54,537 --> 01:01:57,509
And I was like, oh,
she's not gonna like this.

1417
01:01:57,576 --> 01:02:01,016
‐ [ applause ]
‐ I'm feeling a little tense.

1418
01:02:01,083 --> 01:02:02,953
‐ Anybody else? No?
‐ [ laughter ]

1419
01:02:03,020 --> 01:02:06,594
‐ I'm a comic.
‐ [ laughter ]

1420
01:02:06,661 --> 01:02:11,136
And it's our job to name, uh,
the elephant in the room.

1421
01:02:11,203 --> 01:02:13,107
Do we know what that is?

1422
01:02:13,173 --> 01:02:15,444
♪♪♪♪♪♪

1423
01:02:15,511 --> 01:02:18,919
I saw the show where
this great female comic

1424
01:02:18,985 --> 01:02:20,221
was, like, really, like,
calling out

1425
01:02:20,288 --> 01:02:21,691
the elephant in the room

1426
01:02:21,758 --> 01:02:23,595
with Harvey Weinstein
being in the room,

1427
01:02:23,662 --> 01:02:26,834
and I'm like, oh, my God,
that is really badass.

1428
01:02:26,901 --> 01:02:29,472
I didn't know that
we had to bring our own mace

1429
01:02:29,540 --> 01:02:32,646
and, uh, rape whistles
to Actor's Hour.

1430
01:02:32,713 --> 01:02:35,318
[ booing ]

1431
01:02:35,384 --> 01:02:37,756
Have them be booing you
and still stick to it?

1432
01:02:37,823 --> 01:02:39,961
I mean, it was one
of the coolest things

1433
01:02:40,027 --> 01:02:41,698
I've ever seen.

1434
01:02:41,764 --> 01:02:42,833
‐ Now‐‐
‐ Shut up!

1435
01:02:42,900 --> 01:02:44,002
Now‐‐

1436
01:02:44,069 --> 01:02:46,240
Someone said, "Shut up,"

1437
01:02:46,306 --> 01:02:48,444
and that's
the most triggering thing.

1438
01:02:48,510 --> 01:02:49,279
Oh, shut up?

1439
01:02:49,346 --> 01:02:53,254
Just felt like I kinda saw red.

1440
01:02:53,320 --> 01:02:55,759
That's the part
that is difficult in the room,

1441
01:02:55,826 --> 01:02:59,266
continuing to say,
"Mmm, you're booing me,

1442
01:02:59,332 --> 01:03:02,640
"but I'm gonna keep...

1443
01:03:02,706 --> 01:03:07,348
I'm gonna keep my composure
and say another funny thing."

1444
01:03:07,415 --> 01:03:10,789
This kills at, uh, group therapy
for rape survivors.

1445
01:03:10,856 --> 01:03:12,960
They love it. Yeah.

1446
01:03:13,027 --> 01:03:15,666
‐ Whoo, whoo! Yes!
‐ Yeah!

1447
01:03:15,732 --> 01:03:16,968
‐ Whoo!
‐ Tell us! Whoo!

1448
01:03:17,035 --> 01:03:20,374
I have been raped, surprisingly
by no one in this room,

1449
01:03:20,441 --> 01:03:25,117
but, um, I never got to confront
those guys, so...

1450
01:03:27,957 --> 01:03:29,092
Yes, girl!

1451
01:03:29,159 --> 01:03:33,434
‐ [ cheers and applause ]
‐ Um...

1452
01:03:33,500 --> 01:03:36,641
That is nothing less than an act
of civil disobedience.

1453
01:03:36,708 --> 01:03:40,582
So for anyone out there,
and including the women

1454
01:03:40,649 --> 01:03:44,189
that are saying, "Oh, couldn't
she have been more ladylike?

1455
01:03:44,255 --> 01:03:45,993
Couldn't she have said it
in a softer tone?"

1456
01:03:46,059 --> 01:03:48,932
I go, oh, my gosh, we're still
hearing that stuff.

1457
01:03:48,999 --> 01:03:50,569
‐ All right, thank you.
‐ [ cheers and applause ]

1458
01:03:50,636 --> 01:03:53,842
I wrote her and told her, like,
"You've changed the way

1459
01:03:53,908 --> 01:03:57,583
that I've thought
and behaved onstage,"

1460
01:03:57,650 --> 01:03:59,452
and she's someone who just
started in comedy.

1461
01:03:59,520 --> 01:04:02,358
That's how cool that is that,
like, someone who's

1462
01:04:02,425 --> 01:04:05,899
just starting out can, like,
make me feel so empowered.

1463
01:04:05,966 --> 01:04:10,007
The fact that these women can
get onstage and talk about rape,

1464
01:04:10,074 --> 01:04:14,917
that...that is‐‐
that's feminism.

1465
01:04:14,984 --> 01:04:18,490
Because you know what?
Women have been silent

1466
01:04:18,558 --> 01:04:22,866
about this for hundreds of‐‐
thousands of years.

1467
01:04:26,674 --> 01:04:29,512
I'm so grateful to this
new generation of women.

1468
01:04:29,580 --> 01:04:30,949
They came along
and they're like,

1469
01:04:31,016 --> 01:04:33,253
"Hey, have you been getting
sexually harassed like this

1470
01:04:33,320 --> 01:04:35,124
your whole lives?"
And we're like,

1471
01:04:35,191 --> 01:04:36,259
"Oh, yeah."

1472
01:04:36,326 --> 01:04:39,499
[ laughter ]

1473
01:04:39,567 --> 01:04:42,205
And they're like, "Yeah, you
wanna do something about that?"

1474
01:04:42,271 --> 01:04:45,679
And we're like..."Oh, yeah!"

1475
01:04:45,746 --> 01:04:49,152
‐ [ laughter ]
‐ "That's a very good idea."

1476
01:04:49,219 --> 01:04:51,490
‐ [ applause ]
‐ They're like, "Yeah, yeah."

1477
01:04:51,557 --> 01:04:54,930
We're like, oh,
we're so used to it, you know?

1478
01:04:54,997 --> 01:04:58,370
You're at work, and you're like,
"Ugh, I have to, like,

1479
01:04:58,437 --> 01:05:00,341
"make every guy think
that we also might fuck

1480
01:05:00,408 --> 01:05:01,944
and do a good job."

1481
01:05:02,011 --> 01:05:04,817
[ laughter ]

1482
01:05:04,884 --> 01:05:09,827
♪♪♪♪♪♪

1483
01:05:09,894 --> 01:05:15,037
What I do like is now I'm seeing
comics speak up.

1484
01:05:15,104 --> 01:05:19,512
I'm seeing a lot of badass girls
get into this field now.

1485
01:05:19,580 --> 01:05:23,588
I feel like they're equipped
more‐‐more than we were.

1486
01:05:23,655 --> 01:05:25,959
I do just wanna confess,
like, the fame grab

1487
01:05:26,026 --> 01:05:28,297
for a second, though.
Like, I wanna fully confess it.

1488
01:05:28,363 --> 01:05:31,403
Um, when I was getting raped
five years ago...

1489
01:05:31,470 --> 01:05:33,507
‐ [ laughter ]
‐ I remember thinking to myself,

1490
01:05:33,575 --> 01:05:36,480
"I can't wait!"
‐ [ laughter ]

1491
01:05:36,547 --> 01:05:40,989
"I can't wait to use this
to get ahead in comedy."

1492
01:05:41,056 --> 01:05:42,626
[ laughter ]

1493
01:05:42,693 --> 01:05:46,534
I think what people like
about my narrative right now

1494
01:05:46,601 --> 01:05:49,573
is that I'm like
David and Goliath, giant slayer.

1495
01:05:49,640 --> 01:05:54,617
This nobody little girl stood up
to the Big, Bad Wolf,

1496
01:05:54,683 --> 01:05:59,927
and once you yourself
stand up against power,

1497
01:05:59,994 --> 01:06:02,766
then the narrative changes.

1498
01:06:02,833 --> 01:06:12,853
♪♪♪♪♪♪

1499
01:06:12,920 --> 01:06:16,426
♪♪ White guys ♪♪

1500
01:06:16,493 --> 01:06:17,863
♪♪ White guys ♪♪

1501
01:06:17,930 --> 01:06:21,771
[ laughter ]

1502
01:06:21,838 --> 01:06:24,042
You guys have had
a pretty bad year.

1503
01:06:24,109 --> 01:06:25,879
[ laughter ]

1504
01:06:25,946 --> 01:06:26,948
[ cheers and applause ]

1505
01:06:27,014 --> 01:06:28,718
I blow my husband
whenever he wants,

1506
01:06:28,785 --> 01:06:30,454
so I do do that. I just‐‐
if he wants a blow job,

1507
01:06:30,522 --> 01:06:32,793
I just give it to him.
I don't know why.

1508
01:06:32,860 --> 01:06:36,133
I know I love propping up
the patriarchy, you know?

1509
01:06:36,199 --> 01:06:37,769
[ laughter ]

1510
01:06:37,836 --> 01:06:39,305
No, that's what he calls
his balls.

1511
01:06:39,372 --> 01:06:41,644
Maybe the Me Too Movement
didn't exactly

1512
01:06:41,711 --> 01:06:43,147
open more doors for women.

1513
01:06:43,213 --> 01:06:45,986
I mean, people were saying it's
gonna close doors for women.

1514
01:06:46,052 --> 01:06:48,825
You know, men aren't gonna
wanna work with women anymore,

1515
01:06:48,892 --> 01:06:50,962
and it's like,
oh, go fuck yourself, you know?

1516
01:06:51,029 --> 01:06:53,267
Really? We're supposed to put up
with that

1517
01:06:53,333 --> 01:06:55,471
so that everybody
feels comfortable?

1518
01:06:55,539 --> 01:06:58,945
But on the other hand,
it really‐‐I feel like

1519
01:06:59,012 --> 01:07:00,582
there was a definite shift,

1520
01:07:00,649 --> 01:07:03,688
and we stopped competing
with one another,

1521
01:07:03,755 --> 01:07:05,391
and we went, you know what?
This is it.

1522
01:07:05,457 --> 01:07:06,894
We're in it together.

1523
01:07:06,961 --> 01:07:11,002
Kathy, I'm in a car with some‐‐
with New York's finest.

1524
01:07:11,069 --> 01:07:12,338
[ laughter ]

1525
01:07:12,405 --> 01:07:14,409
Amy Schumer sent me
this really great video

1526
01:07:14,476 --> 01:07:16,146
the day the Trump photo
went live

1527
01:07:16,213 --> 01:07:17,850
and the walls were caving in,

1528
01:07:17,916 --> 01:07:20,187
and I get this, you know,
this video,

1529
01:07:20,254 --> 01:07:22,258
and she's
with three other comics,

1530
01:07:22,325 --> 01:07:24,028
and it was so supportive.

1531
01:07:24,095 --> 01:07:27,903
We just wanna say we fucking
love you and we're with you.

1532
01:07:27,970 --> 01:07:28,972
‐ We're with you. We're‐‐
‐ You're hysterical.

1533
01:07:29,038 --> 01:07:30,441
‐ You're hilarious.
‐ And you looked

1534
01:07:30,508 --> 01:07:32,078
fucking great in that picture,
by the way.

1535
01:07:32,144 --> 01:07:33,681
‐ Yeah.
‐ Gorgeous. All the way.

1536
01:07:33,748 --> 01:07:36,353
So hot, and we love you,
and you make us laugh so much.

1537
01:07:36,419 --> 01:07:37,890
We love you.

1538
01:07:37,956 --> 01:07:39,793
I felt very supported by it,
very supported,

1539
01:07:39,860 --> 01:07:41,731
especially at that time
where it was... [ scoffs ]

1540
01:07:41,797 --> 01:07:44,770
not exactly popular
to support me.

1541
01:07:45,772 --> 01:07:47,809
Like, people just started going
to each other's shows anyway,

1542
01:07:47,876 --> 01:07:49,613
just hanging out
with each other,

1543
01:07:49,680 --> 01:07:51,884
and it's really remarkable
when you do stuff like that,

1544
01:07:51,951 --> 01:07:56,727
how much it grows,
and not to sound too corny,

1545
01:07:56,794 --> 01:08:00,735
but that's how movements happen,
and that's what I feel like

1546
01:08:00,802 --> 01:08:02,573
is happening right now
with women in comedy.

1547
01:08:02,639 --> 01:08:07,114
It's like we're all‐‐
we're all fueling each other,

1548
01:08:07,181 --> 01:08:09,820
and it's becoming
something bigger, you know?

1549
01:08:09,887 --> 01:08:11,356
It's‐‐It's made me closer
to women

1550
01:08:11,423 --> 01:08:13,795
and feel better about being
a woman.

1551
01:08:13,861 --> 01:08:15,397
'Cause we've all been
in the same hotels.

1552
01:08:15,464 --> 01:08:17,903
You know, we've been,
like, depressed

1553
01:08:17,970 --> 01:08:19,607
at the same Howard Johnson's
in Toledo.

1554
01:08:19,673 --> 01:08:20,775
‐ Yeah.
‐ Yeah.

1555
01:08:20,842 --> 01:08:22,411
And you guys have been there.

1556
01:08:22,478 --> 01:08:25,184
I've learned to become
super supportive

1557
01:08:25,251 --> 01:08:28,123
of other female comics
because people did that for me.

1558
01:08:28,190 --> 01:08:30,695
Like, Amy Schumer.
Look at "Inside Amy Schumer."

1559
01:08:30,762 --> 01:08:32,933
There's so many female comics.

1560
01:08:33,000 --> 01:08:34,068
Now I know what
you're all thinking.

1561
01:08:34,135 --> 01:08:35,772
You wanna see the doctors
right away,

1562
01:08:35,839 --> 01:08:37,241
but you're just gonna have
to settle

1563
01:08:37,308 --> 01:08:40,982
for the unsung heroes up here
who do all the real work.

1564
01:08:41,049 --> 01:08:42,586
Doctors can be
very unapproachable.

1565
01:08:42,653 --> 01:08:44,957
It's like, we get it,
Your Grace.

1566
01:08:45,024 --> 01:08:47,028
‐ You're super busy.
‐ And we're not busy?

1567
01:08:47,094 --> 01:08:48,731
Thank you.

1568
01:08:48,798 --> 01:08:51,604
"Inside Amy Schumer"‐‐
Comedy Central used to say

1569
01:08:51,671 --> 01:08:54,309
our demographic is men,
and it's gotta be a man

1570
01:08:54,375 --> 01:08:59,085
of this age, so Amy changed
that, you know, dramatically.

1571
01:08:59,152 --> 01:09:01,757
[ cheers and applause ]

1572
01:09:01,824 --> 01:09:05,599
It really does take one person
in a position of power.

1573
01:09:05,665 --> 01:09:08,705
Once they anoint you
in this business,

1574
01:09:08,771 --> 01:09:10,875
it helps tremendously.

1575
01:09:10,942 --> 01:09:15,785
I had been coming up
against a bunch of walls

1576
01:09:15,852 --> 01:09:16,954
of people not knowing
what to do with me.

1577
01:09:17,021 --> 01:09:20,027
I was different.
I looked different,

1578
01:09:20,094 --> 01:09:24,268
and Chelsea Handler was
the first person who got it.

1579
01:09:24,335 --> 01:09:27,609
You have two lesbians already.
A third one would not kill you.

1580
01:09:27,676 --> 01:09:28,911
[ laughter ]

1581
01:09:28,978 --> 01:09:31,182
We'll be like
the lesbian Destiny's Child.

1582
01:09:31,249 --> 01:09:33,086
[ cheers and applause ]

1583
01:09:33,153 --> 01:09:35,892
Yeah! Yeah!

1584
01:09:35,959 --> 01:09:38,631
Tina Fey gave me some
really cool opportunities,

1585
01:09:38,698 --> 01:09:41,369
which led to getting
on "The Mindy Project."

1586
01:09:41,436 --> 01:09:43,140
They definitely all got
their arm back,

1587
01:09:43,206 --> 01:09:45,912
lifting people up.

1588
01:09:45,979 --> 01:09:49,052
I could hook you up if you wanna
be an Uber driver.

1589
01:09:49,118 --> 01:09:51,189
I'm good. I already have a job,
thank you very much.

1590
01:09:51,256 --> 01:09:53,728
I think women are becoming
a lot more powerful.

1591
01:09:53,795 --> 01:09:55,832
I also think it's gonna take
a long time.

1592
01:09:55,899 --> 01:09:58,905
But I've seen that the more
and more that we come together,

1593
01:09:58,971 --> 01:10:00,909
the more work
everyone's getting,

1594
01:10:00,976 --> 01:10:03,982
and the more money
everyone's making.

1595
01:10:04,850 --> 01:10:06,119
You have a new special out.

1596
01:10:06,186 --> 01:10:08,290
Yeah, I have a special
called "Bangin',"

1597
01:10:08,357 --> 01:10:09,927
and I'm really proud of it.

1598
01:10:09,994 --> 01:10:11,797
I've been doing this forever,
and now I'm like,

1599
01:10:11,864 --> 01:10:14,469
graduating from clubs
to, like, actual theaters.

1600
01:10:14,536 --> 01:10:15,705
The other thing
people might know you from

1601
01:10:15,772 --> 01:10:17,108
is how good you are at roasts.

1602
01:10:17,174 --> 01:10:19,212
I just did‐‐Yeah, I did
the "Roast of Alec Baldwin."

1603
01:10:19,278 --> 01:10:20,514
I've done
the "Roast of Bruce Willis,"

1604
01:10:20,582 --> 01:10:21,884
and I did
the "Roast of Rob Lowe."

1605
01:10:21,951 --> 01:10:24,222
I feel like it's my thing now.

1606
01:10:24,288 --> 01:10:25,925
You are fucking funny.

1607
01:10:25,992 --> 01:10:28,263
♪♪♪♪♪♪

1608
01:10:28,330 --> 01:10:30,401
There's so many types of women

1609
01:10:30,467 --> 01:10:32,304
doing so many types
of comedy now.

1610
01:10:32,371 --> 01:10:35,277
And there's more of an appetite.

1611
01:10:35,344 --> 01:10:37,014
I hope that when women
see me on the stage

1612
01:10:37,081 --> 01:10:40,387
they can go,
"Wow. I think I can, too."

1613
01:10:40,454 --> 01:10:42,793
Our new co‐host
Sherri Shepherd!

1614
01:10:42,859 --> 01:10:44,395
‐ [ cheers and applause ]
‐ Fist bump. Put it in.

1615
01:10:44,462 --> 01:10:47,669
But I wanna‐‐
I wanna see more women.

1616
01:10:47,736 --> 01:10:50,608
I want to see a woman
in a burqa get onstage

1617
01:10:50,675 --> 01:10:52,946
and tell her truth.

1618
01:10:53,013 --> 01:10:54,883
Like, I followed, uh,
a white comedian

1619
01:10:54,950 --> 01:10:58,858
talking about horses
the other day.

1620
01:10:58,925 --> 01:11:01,797
No, it was great material.
It was funny shit.

1621
01:11:01,864 --> 01:11:04,202
It was‐‐It was great material
about horses.

1622
01:11:04,268 --> 01:11:08,210
I was so jealous.
'Cause I knew. I was like,

1623
01:11:08,276 --> 01:11:10,582
I‐I know I can't get away
with that.

1624
01:11:10,648 --> 01:11:11,917
[ laughter ]

1625
01:11:11,984 --> 01:11:14,590
Like, if I was up here
talking about horses

1626
01:11:14,656 --> 01:11:16,861
for, like, an hour,
you guys would be like,

1627
01:11:16,927 --> 01:11:18,531
"This bitch know
what's going on?"

1628
01:11:18,598 --> 01:11:20,267
[ laughter ]

1629
01:11:20,334 --> 01:11:23,541
Do you feel like there's been
a blossoming of voices,

1630
01:11:23,608 --> 01:11:25,745
of women and women of color?

1631
01:11:25,812 --> 01:11:28,283
[ exhales deeply ]

1632
01:11:28,350 --> 01:11:30,889
Mm.

1633
01:11:30,955 --> 01:11:33,694
I think it's definitely going
in the right direction

1634
01:11:33,761 --> 01:11:35,865
for comedy for Black women.

1635
01:11:35,932 --> 01:11:39,071
I think they are getting
a lot more attention now.

1636
01:11:39,138 --> 01:11:42,546
But I think there are still
some roadblocks.

1637
01:11:42,612 --> 01:11:51,463
♪♪♪♪♪♪

1638
01:11:51,530 --> 01:11:55,037
I wanna see a female comic
get a deal at Netflix

1639
01:11:55,104 --> 01:11:58,343
that's a $50 million deal
like all of the other men.

1640
01:11:58,410 --> 01:12:00,715
I don't know any woman
that has done that.

1641
01:12:00,782 --> 01:12:09,633
♪♪♪♪♪♪

1642
01:12:09,700 --> 01:12:11,469
I probably earned
about $75 million

1643
01:12:11,537 --> 01:12:13,674
over the course of my career.

1644
01:12:13,741 --> 01:12:15,177
Believe it or not,
it's still for real, like,

1645
01:12:15,244 --> 01:12:18,518
a tenth of what my male
counterparts have earned.

1646
01:12:18,584 --> 01:12:21,524
Like, I'm not even gonna‐‐
I have to be honest about that.

1647
01:12:21,590 --> 01:12:23,360
I brought a death threat
for you.

1648
01:12:23,426 --> 01:12:25,698
"Go to hell, Kathy." And then
this is what I want you to know

1649
01:12:25,765 --> 01:12:27,334
about the Trumpers,
like, how random they are.

1650
01:12:27,401 --> 01:12:30,274
"You are no different
than Bill Cosby."

1651
01:12:30,340 --> 01:12:40,427
[ laughter ]

1652
01:12:40,494 --> 01:12:42,532
I can think of one way, but...

1653
01:12:42,599 --> 01:12:43,801
[ laughter ]

1654
01:12:43,868 --> 01:12:45,572
We still have a lot of work
to do.

1655
01:12:45,638 --> 01:12:48,945
As much as there's progress,
if you notice the progress,

1656
01:12:49,011 --> 01:12:51,650
it's not really a trajectory
for all women.

1657
01:12:51,717 --> 01:12:54,690
It's kind of like we're still
in a period of fits and starts.

1658
01:12:54,756 --> 01:12:56,560
[ applause ]

1659
01:12:56,627 --> 01:12:59,232
It's very rare and unusual

1660
01:12:59,298 --> 01:13:03,808
to see a female comic
perform pregnant

1661
01:13:03,875 --> 01:13:08,383
because female comics
don't get pregnant.

1662
01:13:08,450 --> 01:13:10,053
[ laughter ]

1663
01:13:10,120 --> 01:13:12,792
Once they do get pregnant,
they generally disappear.

1664
01:13:12,859 --> 01:13:14,997
That's not the case
with male comics.

1665
01:13:15,063 --> 01:13:17,736
Once they have a baby,
they'll get up onstage

1666
01:13:17,802 --> 01:13:20,107
a week afterwards,
and they'll be like,

1667
01:13:20,173 --> 01:13:22,779
"Guys, I just had
this fucking baby.

1668
01:13:22,846 --> 01:13:25,017
"That baby's
a little piece of shit.

1669
01:13:25,083 --> 01:13:28,023
"It's so annoying and boring,"
and all these other shitty dads

1670
01:13:28,089 --> 01:13:32,431
in the audience are like,
"That's hilarious. I identify,"

1671
01:13:32,498 --> 01:13:35,404
and their fame just swells,
because they become

1672
01:13:35,470 --> 01:13:39,078
this relatable family funny man
all of a sudden.

1673
01:13:39,145 --> 01:13:42,519
Meanwhile, the mom is at home,
chapping her nipples,

1674
01:13:42,586 --> 01:13:44,055
feeding the fucking baby,

1675
01:13:44,121 --> 01:13:47,862
and wearing a frozen diaper
'cause her pussy needs to heal

1676
01:13:47,929 --> 01:13:51,570
from the baby's head
shredding it up. She's busy.

1677
01:13:51,637 --> 01:13:52,939
[ laughter ]

1678
01:13:57,147 --> 01:14:00,588
‐ Okay. Oh, oh, oh, oh.
‐ [ baby crying ]

1679
01:14:00,655 --> 01:14:01,991
‐ Here you go.
‐ [ baby fusses ]

1680
01:14:02,057 --> 01:14:03,995
She's one month old.

1681
01:14:04,061 --> 01:14:05,430
Be right back.
Just wanted you to meet her.

1682
01:14:05,497 --> 01:14:08,604
I mean, I'm scared about how
I'm gonna juggle

1683
01:14:08,671 --> 01:14:10,575
being a mother
and doing stand‐up,

1684
01:14:10,642 --> 01:14:13,079
and I'm sure I'll fuck up a lot.

1685
01:14:13,146 --> 01:14:16,419
Uh, I know it's been
helpful to me

1686
01:14:16,486 --> 01:14:19,760
to listen to other comics
talk about being a mom.

1687
01:14:19,826 --> 01:14:22,431
I‐I just relate more when
I can hear other female comics

1688
01:14:22,498 --> 01:14:24,368
talk about juggling here.

1689
01:14:26,840 --> 01:14:28,544
So, no, I have a daughter.
She's my world.

1690
01:14:28,611 --> 01:14:31,917
She's my everything. She's like
5 or 12 or something like that,

1691
01:14:31,984 --> 01:14:33,320
and, um...
‐ [ laughter ]

1692
01:14:33,386 --> 01:14:35,123
I did take my daughter
on the road with me

1693
01:14:35,190 --> 01:14:39,165
when I‐‐when she was little,
when she could fly for free.

1694
01:14:39,231 --> 01:14:40,500
I mean, literally,
she was, like, 6 months old

1695
01:14:40,568 --> 01:14:43,173
when I started taking her,
and I'd just hand her over

1696
01:14:43,239 --> 01:14:44,910
to somebody in the green room.

1697
01:14:44,977 --> 01:14:46,245
The opening act
in the green room,

1698
01:14:46,312 --> 01:14:48,083
and I say, "Read her a book
until I get offstage,"

1699
01:14:48,149 --> 01:14:50,053
and they were so nervous.

1700
01:14:50,120 --> 01:14:52,157
You're gonna save
your chopsticks?

1701
01:14:52,224 --> 01:14:53,426
‐ This one or this one?
‐ When I was a kid,

1702
01:14:53,493 --> 01:14:56,032
we used to shave‐‐
save our chopsticks.

1703
01:14:56,099 --> 01:14:57,869
‐ Oh, Daddy forgot his‐‐
‐ We have chopsticks at home.

1704
01:14:57,936 --> 01:14:59,673
I know, but I'm just...

1705
01:14:59,740 --> 01:15:01,476
We were poor.

1706
01:15:01,543 --> 01:15:03,614
So are we.

1707
01:15:03,681 --> 01:15:13,400
♪♪♪♪♪♪

1708
01:15:13,466 --> 01:15:15,370
Hello!

1709
01:15:15,437 --> 01:15:17,141
‐ How you doing?
‐ Okay.

1710
01:15:17,207 --> 01:15:19,378
Good. Do you wanna play
a little bit of cards

1711
01:15:19,445 --> 01:15:20,848
while these people are here?
‐ If you want.

1712
01:15:20,915 --> 01:15:22,084
Okay.

1713
01:15:22,151 --> 01:15:24,388
I started working on
all the traumas

1714
01:15:24,455 --> 01:15:29,733
that I've had in my life,
and it's been fucking hard.

1715
01:15:29,800 --> 01:15:33,841
But I think this is good for me,
'cause it's making me face

1716
01:15:33,908 --> 01:15:38,249
literally all the stuff I've
never faced in my whole life.

1717
01:15:38,316 --> 01:15:39,485
I decided to retire
from stand‐up

1718
01:15:39,553 --> 01:15:41,255
about two, three years ago.

1719
01:15:41,322 --> 01:15:44,896
I wanna do something
that has a clear message

1720
01:15:44,963 --> 01:15:46,499
to make people feel better
about themselves.

1721
01:15:46,567 --> 01:15:50,173
Lisa quit. Lisa Lampanelli quit,

1722
01:15:50,240 --> 01:15:52,077
and I fucking love
that she quit.

1723
01:15:52,144 --> 01:15:53,714
And now she does self‐help.

1724
01:15:53,781 --> 01:15:55,350
I do not want
any transgender kid,

1725
01:15:55,417 --> 01:15:57,421
any gay kid,
any African American person,

1726
01:15:57,488 --> 01:15:59,893
to feel like the jokes are real,
so I said,

1727
01:15:59,960 --> 01:16:01,396
you know what? It's all gone.
‐ Yep.

1728
01:16:01,462 --> 01:16:02,999
I'm gonna
send a message of love

1729
01:16:03,066 --> 01:16:05,437
in a funny way, and that's, uh,
how it's gonna be.

1730
01:16:05,504 --> 01:16:07,676
She told me she's never
been happier,

1731
01:16:07,742 --> 01:16:10,280
and I was like, "God, someday,
I'm right behind you."

1732
01:16:10,347 --> 01:16:12,384
I wanna go do self‐help
because I love‐‐

1733
01:16:12,451 --> 01:16:15,157
that's what my act
is turning into.

1734
01:16:15,223 --> 01:16:17,094
That's the fucked up thing
about being a woman,

1735
01:16:17,161 --> 01:16:19,031
is that I did
the "Roast of Alec Baldwin,"

1736
01:16:19,098 --> 01:16:20,500
and everyone called me old,
and the thing is,

1737
01:16:20,568 --> 01:16:23,641
these men are twice my age
calling me old.

1738
01:16:23,708 --> 01:16:24,876
But to them, I truly am old.

1739
01:16:24,943 --> 01:16:27,281
I'm literally older
than all of their wives,

1740
01:16:27,347 --> 01:16:28,551
so, like, they're not wrong.
‐ [ laughter ]

1741
01:16:28,617 --> 01:16:32,124
I wanna, like, make other women
feel less alone.

1742
01:16:32,191 --> 01:16:33,326
That's why I talk about sex
all the time.

1743
01:16:33,393 --> 01:16:36,199
If you would have asked me,
like, a year ago,

1744
01:16:36,265 --> 01:16:38,904
"Nikki, will you ever eat ass
in your life?"

1745
01:16:38,971 --> 01:16:40,541
‐ [ laughter ]
‐ I would've been like,

1746
01:16:40,608 --> 01:16:41,877
"Yeah, I did two years ago,"

1747
01:16:41,944 --> 01:16:44,148
but if you would've asked me
four years ago,

1748
01:16:44,215 --> 01:16:45,985
like, I would've been like,
never.

1749
01:16:46,052 --> 01:16:47,622
My whole life,
I'll go without eating ass.

1750
01:16:47,689 --> 01:16:49,860
But one time I got horny enough
that I was just, like,

1751
01:16:49,926 --> 01:16:53,032
it was right there by my nose,
and I was like, I'm going in.

1752
01:16:53,099 --> 01:16:55,538
And I went in,
and I've only done it once,

1753
01:16:55,605 --> 01:16:57,876
and I haven't done it since,
but because I've eaten ass,

1754
01:16:57,942 --> 01:17:01,249
I know I am a woman
who can do anything.

1755
01:17:01,315 --> 01:17:05,223
‐ Like, I can do anything...
‐ [ cheers and applause ]

1756
01:17:05,290 --> 01:17:07,428
...except be president
'cause I'm a woman.

1757
01:17:07,494 --> 01:17:09,298
[ applause ]

1758
01:17:09,365 --> 01:17:11,436
♪♪♪♪♪♪

1759
01:17:17,147 --> 01:17:19,251
Whatever this life has in store,
whether it's kids

1760
01:17:19,318 --> 01:17:21,957
or having a movie career
or something bad happens,

1761
01:17:22,024 --> 01:17:25,330
there's always comedy
to be mined from that,

1762
01:17:25,397 --> 01:17:28,002
and that's why I love
stand‐up comedy.

1763
01:17:28,069 --> 01:17:30,273
[ nasally voice ] Amazing.

1764
01:17:30,340 --> 01:17:33,279
I'm offering up myself
in an effort to find myself,

1765
01:17:33,346 --> 01:17:35,985
hoping that in doing so,
you will also find yourself.

1766
01:17:36,052 --> 01:17:38,056
[ cheering ]

1767
01:17:38,123 --> 01:17:39,526
Stand‐up helped me immensely.

1768
01:17:39,593 --> 01:17:42,364
Please laugh at all my jokes.
I have a heart murmur.

1769
01:17:42,431 --> 01:17:45,538
Just to write a joke
and share it with somebody,

1770
01:17:45,605 --> 01:17:49,613
that's really just opened me up
as a person.

1771
01:17:49,679 --> 01:17:50,948
I believe in Jesus.

1772
01:17:51,015 --> 01:17:53,621
Um, just kidding.
I don't, I don't. Um...

1773
01:17:53,687 --> 01:17:56,894
I mean, I do, like, sometimes,
like,

1774
01:17:56,960 --> 01:17:58,731
when there's turbulence,
oh, my God.

1775
01:17:58,798 --> 01:18:00,167
[ laughter ]

1776
01:18:00,233 --> 01:18:01,703
I do feel success.

1777
01:18:01,770 --> 01:18:04,943
I do feel like things
are really happening.

1778
01:18:05,010 --> 01:18:07,816
But I don't think that I will
ever get that hole filled,

1779
01:18:07,882 --> 01:18:09,418
and I think that's a good thing

1780
01:18:09,485 --> 01:18:11,657
because it'll make me
keep doing stand‐up.

1781
01:18:11,723 --> 01:18:14,996
Like, once you're content
and happy, then what?

1782
01:18:15,063 --> 01:18:16,533
♪♪♪♪♪♪

1783
01:18:16,600 --> 01:18:20,373
I'm so glad that I've been
talking about breast cancer.

1784
01:18:20,440 --> 01:18:22,377
And I started talking about it
on my podcast.

1785
01:18:22,444 --> 01:18:24,883
And so I would get
these emails from women.

1786
01:18:24,950 --> 01:18:26,620
They were like,
"After your podcast,

1787
01:18:26,687 --> 01:18:29,358
"I'm like, driving
to get a mammogram.

1788
01:18:29,425 --> 01:18:31,763
I'm going now.
Me and my mom are going."

1789
01:18:31,830 --> 01:18:35,370
And I was like, okay,
this is why you do this.

1790
01:18:35,437 --> 01:18:38,711
That's me as an ice cream.
[ laughs ]

1791
01:18:38,777 --> 01:18:42,284
When I discovered who I was
and found my place in L. A.,

1792
01:18:42,351 --> 01:18:44,321
found comedy, I found myself.

1793
01:18:44,388 --> 01:18:47,595
Even if you don't like
gay people,

1794
01:18:47,662 --> 01:18:51,168
maybe I'll make you laugh,
and if that‐‐if that makes you

1795
01:18:51,235 --> 01:18:56,045
feel less hate
towards gay people, then great.

1796
01:18:56,112 --> 01:18:59,051
I'm doing something right.

1797
01:18:59,118 --> 01:19:01,355
I finally get the courage
to tell her.

1798
01:19:01,422 --> 01:19:05,397
I'm like, "Mom, I'm gay,"
and her face just drops.

1799
01:19:05,463 --> 01:19:08,604
She becomes silent.
She looks stern.

1800
01:19:08,671 --> 01:19:10,340
I don't know
what she's thinking,

1801
01:19:10,407 --> 01:19:12,344
and this goes on
for what feels like an eternity.

1802
01:19:12,411 --> 01:19:13,647
I'm like, oh, my God.
What's happening?

1803
01:19:13,714 --> 01:19:17,120
Like, is this the end
of our relationship?

1804
01:19:17,187 --> 01:19:20,093
Does she hate me?
And finally, my mom gets up,

1805
01:19:20,160 --> 01:19:22,231
very sternly,
and she grabs her purse.

1806
01:19:22,297 --> 01:19:26,038
She goes, "Let's go!
We're going to Hooters,

1807
01:19:26,105 --> 01:19:28,509
and we're gonna tell 'em
it's your birthday."

1808
01:19:28,577 --> 01:19:30,615
‐ [ laughter ]
‐ And I was like, yes!

1809
01:19:30,681 --> 01:19:32,552
[ cheers and applause ]

1810
01:19:32,619 --> 01:19:35,758
[ laughter ]

1811
01:19:35,825 --> 01:19:40,801
I think that we changed
the landscape of what is comedy,

1812
01:19:40,868 --> 01:19:42,471
and I really appreciate that.

1813
01:19:42,538 --> 01:19:43,506
‐ [ cheers and applause ]
‐ I am not gonna die

1814
01:19:43,574 --> 01:19:45,811
because I failed
as someone else.

1815
01:19:45,878 --> 01:19:51,155
I'm gonna succeed as myself,
and I'm gonna stay here

1816
01:19:51,222 --> 01:19:54,461
and rock the mic
until the next Korean American

1817
01:19:54,529 --> 01:19:58,469
fag hag, shit starter,
girl comic, trash talker

1818
01:19:58,537 --> 01:20:01,777
comes up and takes my place!

1819
01:20:01,843 --> 01:20:10,728
[ loud cheers and applause ]

1820
01:20:10,795 --> 01:20:27,327
♪♪♪♪♪♪

1821
01:20:27,394 --> 01:20:31,670
I'm producing this show called
"Locally Grown Comedy."

1822
01:20:31,737 --> 01:20:37,047
It's a grass roots community
that I've created.

1823
01:20:37,114 --> 01:20:38,550
So there's food in there.

1824
01:20:38,617 --> 01:20:41,556
I want my comedians
to feel very cared for.

1825
01:20:41,623 --> 01:20:44,328
‐ Don't fuck it up.
‐ [ laughs ]

1826
01:20:44,395 --> 01:20:45,831
I've written to each comedian
to thank them

1827
01:20:45,898 --> 01:20:50,240
for doing my show and telling
them how awesome they are

1828
01:20:50,307 --> 01:20:53,279
and how much I appreciate them.

1829
01:20:53,346 --> 01:20:55,785
'Cause that's what I would
wanna hear.

1830
01:20:55,851 --> 01:20:59,793
I'm excited about finding
female comics for my show.

1831
01:20:59,859 --> 01:21:02,130
And one time I had
all females on the show,

1832
01:21:02,197 --> 01:21:03,634
and I didn't say anything
about it.

1833
01:21:03,701 --> 01:21:07,240
Like, I didn't say,
"This is a female comedy show."

1834
01:21:07,307 --> 01:21:08,744
It just was.

1835
01:21:08,811 --> 01:21:11,850
♪♪♪♪♪♪

1836
01:21:11,917 --> 01:21:15,323
We're not just‐‐
it's not shallow laughter.

1837
01:21:15,390 --> 01:21:17,795
It's not jokes
just for the sake of jokes.

1838
01:21:17,862 --> 01:21:20,868
It's about a connection.
It's about sharing a story,

1839
01:21:20,935 --> 01:21:23,206
and that's
a very spiritual thing for me.

1840
01:21:23,272 --> 01:21:25,076
It's like, it is a religion.

1841
01:21:25,143 --> 01:21:27,381
I love the fact that you guys
are laughing at this.

1842
01:21:27,447 --> 01:21:29,786
‐ It's important.
‐ [ laughter ]

1843
01:21:29,853 --> 01:21:31,188
♪♪♪♪♪♪

1844
01:21:31,255 --> 01:21:33,994
This is an occupation where
you get to really find yourself

1845
01:21:34,061 --> 01:21:35,698
and you get to get strong.

1846
01:21:35,765 --> 01:21:37,602
♪♪♪♪♪♪

1847
01:21:37,668 --> 01:21:39,639
You get on that stage,
and you go,

1848
01:21:39,706 --> 01:21:44,582
"I can say something.
I can change opinions."

1849
01:21:44,649 --> 01:21:47,922
I think that's the power
of comedy.

1850
01:21:47,989 --> 01:21:50,761
Kids would go with their parents
to see my show

1851
01:21:50,828 --> 01:21:53,834
and then come out to their
parents afterwards, you know?

1852
01:21:53,901 --> 01:21:56,005
And that to me was
the greatest gift.

1853
01:21:56,072 --> 01:21:57,608
♪♪♪♪♪♪

1854
01:21:57,675 --> 01:21:59,411
Lot of long‐hand written ones.

1855
01:21:59,478 --> 01:22:02,618
Like, one time someone told me
that I'm the only person

1856
01:22:02,685 --> 01:22:04,522
that they've told
that they're trans.

1857
01:22:04,589 --> 01:22:08,630
You know, and they send me
pictures of their animals.

1858
01:22:08,697 --> 01:22:10,233
You know, people, like,
pour their hearts out into 'em.

1859
01:22:10,300 --> 01:22:13,072
♪♪♪♪♪♪

1860
01:22:13,139 --> 01:22:15,578
We're stalking you
while you're doing this, too.

1861
01:22:15,644 --> 01:22:18,784
‐ But you're so awesome.
‐ We fucking love you. Like‐‐

1862
01:22:18,851 --> 01:22:22,090
What I love about going
on the road and around the world

1863
01:22:22,157 --> 01:22:25,531
is seeing how my very human
observations apply to a person

1864
01:22:25,598 --> 01:22:27,200
that looks nothing like me
from a place I've never been to,

1865
01:22:27,267 --> 01:22:31,242
and it is
the coolest thing ever.

1866
01:22:31,308 --> 01:22:33,580
[ cheers and applause ]

1867
01:22:33,647 --> 01:22:36,620
At its core, we all want love.
We all wanna feel seen.

1868
01:22:36,686 --> 01:22:38,289
We all wanna feel acknowledged.

1869
01:22:38,356 --> 01:22:39,592
Nobody wants to feel bad
about themselves.

1870
01:22:39,659 --> 01:22:42,865
Everybody wants to be heard.

1871
01:22:42,932 --> 01:22:44,368
♪♪♪♪♪♪

1872
01:22:44,435 --> 01:22:46,873
If you don't stand up,
you get run over.

1873
01:22:46,940 --> 01:22:48,644
[ applause ]

1874
01:22:48,710 --> 01:22:50,380
♪♪♪♪♪♪

1875
01:22:50,447 --> 01:22:54,388
Hopefully, women in power
become so ubiquitous

1876
01:22:54,455 --> 01:22:56,258
that we don't have to talk
about it anymore.

1877
01:22:56,325 --> 01:22:59,198
[ cheering ]

1878
01:22:59,264 --> 01:23:02,404
I always tell women,
do self‐talk.

1879
01:23:02,471 --> 01:23:04,308
It's your time now.
Make a difference.

1880
01:23:04,374 --> 01:23:06,312
You're gonna change the world.

1881
01:23:06,378 --> 01:23:08,182
And don't sleep
with the other comics.

1882
01:23:08,249 --> 01:23:10,721
That's one thing. Don't‐‐Do not
sleep with the other comics.

1883
01:23:10,788 --> 01:23:13,938
It's just...
[ inhales sharply ] no good.

1884
01:23:16,265 --> 01:23:18,971
[ K. Flay's "I Like Myself
(Most of the Time)" playing ]

1885
01:23:19,037 --> 01:23:22,410
[ cheers and applause ]

1886
01:23:22,477 --> 01:23:24,783
Thank you tonight.
I love you. Mwah!

1887
01:23:24,849 --> 01:23:26,553
[ cheers and applause ]

1888
01:23:26,620 --> 01:23:28,891
<i>♪♪ Everybody wants to be</i>
<i>the girl ♪♪</i>

1889
01:23:28,957 --> 01:23:30,995
Good night!
Thank you for coming!

1890
01:23:31,061 --> 01:23:34,936
<i>♪♪ Everybody wants to be</i>
<i>extraordinarily beautiful ♪♪</i>

1891
01:23:35,003 --> 01:23:36,438
Thank you.

1892
01:23:36,505 --> 01:23:38,209
<i>♪♪ Everybody wants to rule</i>
<i>the world ♪♪</i>

1893
01:23:38,276 --> 01:23:41,616
<i>♪♪ Or the room, at least,</i>
<i>and assume that they'll be ♪♪</i>

1894
01:23:41,683 --> 01:23:44,321
<i>♪♪ The one</i>
<i>with a crowded funeral ♪♪</i>

1895
01:23:44,388 --> 01:23:45,925
[ laughter ]

1896
01:23:45,991 --> 01:23:48,296
<i>♪♪ Everybody wants to have</i>
<i>the time ♪♪</i>

1897
01:23:48,362 --> 01:23:49,398
Thank you very much. Bye‐bye.

1898
01:23:49,464 --> 01:23:50,901
Thank you and good night.

1899
01:23:50,968 --> 01:23:52,270
<i>♪♪ Everybody wants to count</i>
<i>their calories ♪♪</i>

1900
01:23:52,337 --> 01:23:54,474
Hey, my name's Adele Givens.

1901
01:23:54,542 --> 01:23:55,878
Thanks so much.

1902
01:23:55,945 --> 01:23:57,748
<i>♪♪ Baby,</i>
<i>my job is just to rhyme ♪♪</i>

1903
01:23:57,815 --> 01:24:00,119
‐ ♪♪ And I'm fine with that ♪♪
‐ God bless you.

1904
01:24:00,186 --> 01:24:02,491
<i>♪♪ I'll concern myself with all</i>
<i>of the lives I might've had ♪♪</i>

1905
01:24:02,558 --> 01:24:04,161
You freakin' rock!

1906
01:24:04,228 --> 01:24:05,363
Thank you guys so much!

1907
01:24:05,430 --> 01:24:07,000
Thank you very much.

1908
01:24:07,067 --> 01:24:08,236
Thank you!

1909
01:24:08,302 --> 01:24:09,672
Good night, everybody!

1910
01:24:09,739 --> 01:24:11,943
‐ Thank you.
‐ Thank you.

1911
01:24:12,010 --> 01:24:13,479
Thank you.

1912
01:24:13,547 --> 01:24:15,518
‐ Thank you so much.
‐ Thank you, guys.

1913
01:24:15,584 --> 01:24:17,822
<i>♪♪ You only got one shot,</i>
<i>let her rip ♪♪</i>

1914
01:24:17,889 --> 01:24:19,391
‐ ♪♪ Take a dip, have a smoke ♪♪
‐ Good night.

1915
01:24:19,458 --> 01:24:20,861
Thank you.

1916
01:24:20,928 --> 01:24:22,999
<i>♪♪ Try to laugh at the jokes ♪♪</i>

1917
01:24:23,065 --> 01:24:27,307
<i>♪♪ Ha! I like myself</i>
<i>most of the time ♪♪</i>

1918
01:24:27,374 --> 01:24:28,744
<i>♪♪ Is that a crime? ♪♪</i>

1919
01:24:28,810 --> 01:24:31,950
<i>♪♪ Is that a crime? ♪♪</i>

1920
01:24:32,017 --> 01:24:33,520
♪♪♪♪♪♪

1921
01:24:33,587 --> 01:24:36,560
<i>♪♪ I like myself</i>
<i>most of the time ♪♪</i>

1922
01:24:36,626 --> 01:24:39,566
<i>♪♪ Is that a crime? ♪♪</i>

1923
01:24:39,632 --> 01:24:41,870
<i>♪♪ Is that a crime? ♪♪</i>

1924
01:24:41,937 --> 01:24:43,206
♪♪♪♪♪♪

1925
01:24:43,272 --> 01:24:47,347
<i>♪♪ Even planet Earth</i>
<i>took seven days ♪♪</i>

1926
01:24:47,414 --> 01:24:48,984
<i>♪♪ Even if it looks real ♪♪</i>

1927
01:24:49,051 --> 01:24:53,059
<i>♪♪ You can fake it</i>
<i>in a million different ways ♪♪</i>

1928
01:24:53,125 --> 01:24:55,263
<i>♪♪ Nobody chose</i>
<i>to have their face ♪♪</i>

1929
01:24:55,330 --> 01:24:57,000
<i>♪♪ But you're stuck with it ♪♪</i>

1930
01:24:57,067 --> 01:25:01,676
<i>♪♪ So rather than counting my</i>
<i>curses, I try to stay positive ♪♪</i>

1931
01:25:01,743 --> 01:25:03,647
<i>♪♪ I don't think I'm perfect ♪♪</i>

1932
01:25:03,714 --> 01:25:06,452
<i>♪♪ But I've got some things</i>
<i>together ♪♪</i>

1933
01:25:06,519 --> 01:25:07,889
<i>♪♪ I see photos of proposals ♪♪</i>

1934
01:25:07,955 --> 01:25:10,527
<i>♪♪ That I know</i>
<i>are empty gestures ♪♪</i>

1935
01:25:10,594 --> 01:25:13,099
♪♪ Get a grip ♪♪

1936
01:25:13,165 --> 01:25:15,336
<i>♪♪ You only got one shot,</i>
<i>let her rip ♪♪</i>

1937
01:25:15,403 --> 01:25:18,175
<i>♪♪ Take a dip, have a smoke ♪♪</i>

1938
01:25:18,242 --> 01:25:20,981
<i>♪♪ Try to laugh at the jokes,</i>
<i>ha! ♪♪</i>

1939
01:25:21,048 --> 01:25:24,121
<i>♪♪ I like myself</i>
<i>most of the time ♪♪</i>

1940
01:25:24,187 --> 01:25:27,260
<i>♪♪ Is that a crime? ♪♪</i>

1941
01:25:27,327 --> 01:25:31,001
<i>♪♪ Is that a crime? ♪♪</i>

1942
01:25:31,068 --> 01:25:34,474
<i>♪♪ I like myself</i>
<i>most of the time ♪♪</i>

1943
01:25:34,542 --> 01:25:36,846
<i>♪♪ Is that a crime? ♪♪</i>

1944
01:25:36,913 --> 01:25:39,217
<i>♪♪ Is that a crime? ♪♪</i>

1945
01:25:39,284 --> 01:25:43,059
<i>♪♪ Is that a crime? ♪♪</i>

1946
01:25:43,125 --> 01:25:44,361
<i>♪♪ Ha! ♪♪</i>

1947
01:25:44,428 --> 01:25:48,704
<i>♪♪ Is that a crime? ♪♪</i>

1948
01:25:48,770 --> 01:25:52,377
<i>♪♪ Is that a crime? ♪♪</i>

1949
01:25:52,444 --> 01:25:54,114
<i>♪♪ Ha! ♪♪</i>

1950
01:25:54,181 --> 01:25:55,918
<i>♪♪ Is that a crime? ♪♪</i>

1951
01:25:55,985 --> 01:25:59,692
♪♪♪♪♪♪

1952
01:25:59,759 --> 01:26:01,495
Some guys do this thing
in cars,

1953
01:26:01,563 --> 01:26:02,932
which is so disgusting.

1954
01:26:02,999 --> 01:26:05,303
They actually think
they'll get a woman to pull over

1955
01:26:05,370 --> 01:26:07,307
and go on a date with them.
Ready?

1956
01:26:07,374 --> 01:26:09,579
[ imitates horn honking ]
Aah!

1957
01:26:09,646 --> 01:26:12,752
‐ What the fuck is that?
‐ [ laughter ]

1958
01:26:12,818 --> 01:26:14,722
Can you imagine if a woman
was like...

1959
01:26:14,789 --> 01:26:18,329
[ imitates horn honking ]
Hi.

1960
01:26:18,396 --> 01:26:22,237
[ laughter ]

1961
01:26:22,304 --> 01:26:23,840
[ mouthing words ]

1962
01:26:23,907 --> 01:26:26,145
[ laughter ]

1963
01:26:26,211 --> 01:26:28,583
[ continues mouthing words ]

1964
01:26:28,650 --> 01:26:29,919
In Victoria's Secret
'cause they have

1965
01:26:29,986 --> 01:26:31,488
all the little silky stuff,
little silky things,

1966
01:26:31,556 --> 01:26:33,059
and they got the things
written on the back.

1967
01:26:33,125 --> 01:26:34,796
They got "PINK" written
on the back,

1968
01:26:34,862 --> 01:26:36,700
and I bought a pair
of "PINK" underwear,

1969
01:26:36,766 --> 01:26:38,102
so when you get a certain age,

1970
01:26:38,169 --> 01:26:40,841
your ass likes to eat up
all the letters on the...

1971
01:26:40,908 --> 01:26:44,414
So literally the panties just
said... [ crunching sound ]

1972
01:26:44,481 --> 01:26:47,020
[ laughter ]

1973
01:26:47,087 --> 01:26:48,255
It's a funny time period
after sex.

1974
01:26:48,322 --> 01:26:49,491
You just did this series

1975
01:26:49,559 --> 01:26:51,896
of preposterous things together,
really,

1976
01:26:51,963 --> 01:26:54,669
and then, men‐‐their bodies
were, like, important.

1977
01:26:54,736 --> 01:26:55,537
Like, 20 minutes ago,
you had this, like,

1978
01:26:55,604 --> 01:26:58,342
powerful, sexual man body

1979
01:26:58,409 --> 01:27:00,781
that was commanding things,
and now you're just

1980
01:27:00,848 --> 01:27:03,452
running those pointless,
like, post‐sex errands

1981
01:27:03,520 --> 01:27:06,158
around the room, just these...

1982
01:27:06,225 --> 01:27:10,667
flaccid errands
and just grabbing washcloths.

1983
01:27:10,734 --> 01:27:14,041
There's no dumber time
in all of life.

1984
01:27:14,107 --> 01:27:17,247
[ laughter ]

1985
01:27:17,313 --> 01:27:24,194
♪♪♪♪♪♪