How many clients have you seen this week? Five or six.
You take the cash before anything happens? Yes, I do. Yes.
And count it? Yes, I always count it in front of them.
Yeah, I would find that embarrassing if I was an escort.
I'm not, but Caroline is more mercenary.
This programme contains some strong language,
scenes which some viewers may find upsetting, and some scenes of a sexual nature
I'm ready.
I just wanted to say...
..that I belong to you.
I'm yours.
But I want to give myself to another man for an hour,
so I just wondered if you could give me away to him.
OK, darling. Yes. I give you away to Dave for the hour.
Yeah. Thank you.
For several months, I had been spending time with women
around Britain who legally sell sex for a living.
Fuelled by websites and social media, a new economy has emerged,
bringing a world of transactional sex
to people who might never previously have considered it.
"A splendidly satisfactory young lady."
Wow, that one's almost, I don't know, written in... Eloquent.
..sort of Victorian English. Yeah.
But the act still carries a weight of stigma
and many view it as damaging and degrading...
People say, like, I'm a bad mum and stuff like that
cos I do what I do.
But, you know, we're just providing a service.
That's what we're doing.
..raising the question of whether selling sex
can ever be a healthy way to make money.
"I'm very relaxed and will give you a genuine, not acted
"real girlfriend experience.
"I promise you that we will have a time you will never forget."
In Nottingham, I had a breakfast appointment.
KNOCKING
Hi, Louis. Hello. Are you Victoria?
I am. Nice to meet you. And you. Can we come in? Yeah, come on in.
What do you want, you lot? Who's having toast?
At 33 years old, Victoria - her working name -
is a single mum and sole provider for her family.
No! Yeah!
For the last four and a half years, she's worked in the sex industry.
How many children do you have? Four.
Socks would be a bonus at some point, wouldn't they?
Listen to Mummy. You need to go put your socks on.
Yay! OK, bye. Bye. Bye.
I'll let you sit on the comfy chair.
Like an increasing number of women who sell sex,
Victoria finds her clients through social media
and a website called AdultWork.
So, I'll show you my profile.
Is that you? That's me. Yeah.
Classy Filth 69.
"I'm a very honest, caring, upfront and extremely classy lady
"who enjoys all the finer things in life.
"But when it comes to the bedroom, I'm the most naughtiest,
"filthiest lady you would ever meet."
What do you think? It's the yin and the yang.
I like it. Yeah.
And how many bookings would you expect to get
on a day when you are on?
I normally get about four.
So, that... Four in one day? Yeah.
So you've got to understand,
I still like to take the children to school,
so, and then I'll try and do my bookings,
majority of them, while the children are at school.
It's important to you to be around for the kids. Yeah.
So I always say, like, my main job is to be a mother.
Then the second is obviously work.
That's why this is a perfect job for me, you know?
Flexible.
Victoria never takes bookings at home.
She does most of her appointments at hotels around Nottingham,
charging around £250 an hour.
How much do we know about this guy? This client?
I've seen him practically, like, once a week, he sees me.
He's a single guy.
He can just keep going and going and going and going.
Are you aware of there being a degree of danger involved in the work?
There's a danger in anything, isn't there?
I think that this is a lot less dangerous
than me on a night out being drunk and meeting somebody
and going back to a hotel with somebody.
But I think you just have to be on guard.
Have you worked in this one before? Yes.
You need to get into your... I need to get changed.
I need to jump in the shower. You need to get into game mode. Yeah.
TRICKLING WATER
PHONE PINGS
I'm coming. PHONE PINGS
Going and going, isn't it?
INDISTINCT
That's all the jobs coming in. Is it?
It's popping off. Yeah, it's dinner time.
Dinner time? Yeah. Break time. Right.
People on their lunch break... Yeah. ..popping out for a quickie. Yeah.
KNOCKING
With the client arriving, it was time for me to leave.
The exchange of sex for money is legal in Britain,
so long as it doesn't involve coercion, exploitation
or any kind of public nuisance.
And with the advent of social media and specialist websites,
it is on the rise.
Technology has made sexual services more accessible than ever before,
with every taste catered to.
Users can see photos, check reviews and offer feedback.
But the age-old issue of whether sex should ever be traded remains.
A growing number of those involved are said to be students
trying to make ends meet while they pursue an education.
In southwest London, I was meeting a 23-year-old
in her final year of art school.
Hello. Are you Ashley? That's me.
Louis. How do you do? Can we hug instead? Of course.
For several years,
Ashley had streamed live sex shows from home for money.
Six weeks earlier, she'd taken the step of opening an account
on an industry website.
Welcome. I like it. Top floor.
Ashley also has Asperger's.
She lives with her best friend, Georgina.
It's really nice. It's got so much character.
So I understand you've got a booking tonight.
Yeah, at eight o'clock. Did it come through AdultWork?
Yeah. So I put myself as available at about three o'clock today.
And this guy messaged me being like,
"I'm in Fulham. Can you come out for an hour?"
And he was like, "I'm 25. 5ft 10. Same height as you. Clean."
Like, I know. Like, it's going... Yeah. It should be fine.
Have you got reviews of the guy? That I'm going to see? Yeah.
OK, let me... Have you looked at them? No. Let me go and look.
Well, they were all positive so, like, that was fine. Oh, I see.
If you go on it and they're all positive, there's not really a...
He's got 498. GASPS
Reviews? Yeah.
"Good guy, big cock, knows how to use it."
Aah! LAUGHS
"One hour full of orgasms and pleasure.
"Kiss, kiss, kiss."
"Expected someone coy, was instead surprised by a real man,
"someone who genuinely taught me so much about my own body."
Wow! Maybe I'm in for a wild ride tonight.
"Handsome and possessed great skill." Who knows?
Maybe I'll come out a different woman.
Sounds like you've got someone who's been around the block a few times.
I'm ready for it. Bring it on, bitch.
THEY LAUGH
Vroom, vroom! Can I get dressed? Yeah, please.
I'm getting nervous, sorry.
I'm going to be really late.
Well, let's just go then. Let's go.
Just being like... SHE PANTS
How are you feeling?
I'm fine, to be honest. I'm, like, excited.
It's quite fun.
Like, it's like going out, but without the commitment
cos it's only one hour and I can leave.
How many bookings would you say you've had
in the six weeks you've been doing it? Oh, gosh...
50?
Yeah, maybe. Yeah.
It's quite a lot, isn't it?
I know that a lot of people say, like,
"Oh, you don't have to do this."
Like, you know, saviour complex. Like, I don't need to be saved.
I'm doing it on my own terms and I'm actually in power
in this situation and I feel empowered by it.
And if that's how I feel, then that's all that matters, really. You know what I mean?
Would you expect to have an orgasm if you...? No.
I think that I'm, like, a bit closed off
with letting myself have the enjoyment.
It's more about the scenario.
I will orgasm if I'm in a scenario where I feel calm and comfortable
as opposed to, like, the actual pleasure.
But you'd expect to be aroused.
Well, I just get aroused by being touched. Do you?
Yeah. Like, if you're to put your arm on my leg right now,
I'd probably be aroused.
Like, people always "compliment" me, I guess, being like,
"Oh, you're always so wet, you must be so into it."
And I'm just like, "Honey, I'm always wet."
Like, I'm just aroused a lot of the time. Yeah.
LAUGHS
OK, then. LAUGHS
Let me just have a cigarette.
With a moment to myself, I reflected on the strangeness
of what was taking place.
Behind a closed door, Ashley was providing
what is usually understood to be the most intimate physical act
to a stranger, for money.
I wondered whether she was safe and how she really felt
about what was happening.
An hour later, she re-emerged.
How was it?
It was great. I don't know, he was like...
I'm 23. He was like 25.
And he had, like, nice hair and he was kind of cool, I guess.
I was just like, "I would date you.
"I don't know what you're paying me
"cos I would go on a date with you."
And I said... I said to him, I was like,
"Why don't... Why do you use AdultWork?
"Like, why not just go on Tinder or whatever?"
He was like, "On the weekend, it's popping off on Tinder.
"During the week, not so much.
"Everyone's got a job, so got to get on the old AdultWork
"and it's less commitment, isn't it?"
I'm just conscious that you are six weeks in.
It's still really... Early days. Exactly.
I've been so lucky with the clients that I've got
and the way that, like, it's gone for me.
So now you are feeling... What's in your...? I feel great.
I've got money in my bag.
I've been sexually satisfied.
I'm going to go home and order a pizza.
Probably chain smokes some Marlboro cigarettes.
Menthol at the moment.
The common criticism of selling sex -
that the act is necessarily intimate and should not be traded -
is made even more real when the person involved
is in a relationship.
I was curious to meet a woman participating in the sexual economy
but who is part of a committed couple.
Hello. Hi. Can I come in? Come in. How are you?
In West Sussex I was with Caroline - who describes herself as an escort -
and her husband of 44 years, Graham, a chartered surveyor.
On my wedding day was one of the first times I discovered
that I loved being the centre of attention. Mm.
How old were you both? I was 19 and Graham was 23.
And you were both virgins? Mm-hm. Yeah.
Because you'd come from quite a religious upbringing,
both of you. Yes. Yeah.
It wasn't the done thing to have sex before you got married.
Graham would have done it if I'd let him.
But must have been quite difficult -
neither of you with any sexual experience
attempting to have sex for the first time. Yeah.
Yes. It was interesting. Did it work? No.
THEY LAUGH It didn't go very well?
Didn't go very well. It wasn't a revelatory experience. No.
Do you remember it? Vaguely.
Not very well. No. Erm...
It was just on the M1, wasn't it?
Trying to get north. Newport Pagnell.
Oh, yeah. Is that a metaphor? No, it was Newport.
We went to the Lake District for our honeymoon,
so we stopped halfway in a Travel Lodge overnight.
It took a while for you to get comfortable with your sexuality.
Definitely. Yeah. I mean, it took quite a few years, in fact.
Quite a few years.
Put your head down...
Downstairs, Caroline and Graham had arranged a photo shoot
for Caroline's social media to attract more clients.
What sort of work did you do before this, Caroline?
Erm, dental nursing.
I'm still a qualified dental nurse
but I don't really do it much any more.
Do you want to do an explicit one with your bra off? OK.
When you decided to do it, was it for the money or the adventure
or the pleasure of the sex?
I never thought about being an escort until we met some friends
on holiday when we were in the south of France
and she told us that she was an escort.
Probably took me about a year to come to the decision.
When she first said it, Graham said, "Oh, you ought to do that."
I was being... I was joking, to be honest.
He was joking, but 1% serious.
You know, I struggle with...
Or I have done over the years, with my self-esteem.
So this helps me to see myself in a better light
when I can see that lots of men want to come and see me.
And they fancy me.
It makes me feel better about myself.
And now Graham's my biggest encourager.
Right, now, turn round to face the mirror.
Yeah, that's great.
I was back in Nottingham with Victoria.
I'd been curious to get to know a little more about her.
I knew she'd had to rebuild her life five years earlier
when she'd left the father of her children.
Tell me if you need a hand...
She'd also told me she'd had a difficult upbringing,
moving out of the family home at 14.
I wondered how that had affected her later on.
She was getting her kitbag ready for an appointment.
I'm so disorganised.
What were you looking for?
A stocking. I only had one stocking. Oh.
This is going to sound like
a really weird open ended question, OK?
But what do you think is the right way of doing it?
What's the right way of doing sex? Mm.
Everybody's different.
Everybody's different, aren't they?
So... For you, then. For me?
I see having a cuddle as sex.
I've had, like, so many bad sexual experiences.
Like, people just abusing me, taking everything from me from being 14.
I just think there's nothing...
I can just easily do it. There's nothing.
There's no good connection there, through sex.
So I've turned it around.
So I've got an ability to be able to have sex with anybody
and it not mean anything
so I can easily go do my job.
You know what I mean? So I just look at it in a positive way.
Is that bad? CHUCKLES
Does it feel bad?
No, no. I'm not doing anything...
..wrong or illegal or anything that...
..people don't want to do.
People want to do this. People come to me, you know?
I just use it as an advantage.
Do you see what I mean?
So... Were you abused when you were...
Before you were 14, were you abused? No. 14.
I was just a stray of a kid, really. I was everywhere.
So people took advantage.
Especially one guy in particular, who was 25.
Erm, obviously, he just seen me as vulnerable, but...
Yeah. Someone who took advantage of you? Yeah, yeah.
But when you're young and when you're vulnerable,
and when you've got nowhere to go and nothing to do,
you don't go to school
and you don't have, really, a home...
..and somebody shows an interest, you don't realise it's just sexual.
You'd think that they care about you and stuff like that.
You know, so...
I used to do all these crazy sexual things to keep him happy.
Yeah, sex is just not the same for me as most people.
I think that's the best way to word it, I think.
So... Is that all that's coming? I can carry that. Are you sure? Yeah.
Must be good for something.
Is that it? That's it. All done.
The revelation of Victoria's abuse
seemed to put her decision to sell sex in a different light.
It now seemed a side effect of her upbringing,
but whether that made it the wrong lifestyle for her
was a different question.
We were on our way to another hotel.
One of her regulars had agreed to speak to me
with his identity protected.
KNOCKING Hello.
How are you doing? Nervous. Yeah, I can imagine.
Victoria was saying that you've...
You've been seeing each other for a couple of months.
Couple of months, yeah.
How did you first find out about her?
It was through an online site, actually.
Looked at Victoria's profile.
I went really, really deep into the research of, like, what she's like.
As I understand it, you were coming out of a relationship.
Yes, that's correct.
It had kind of gone dead, effectively.
There was no contact any more. No physical side to it.
No physical side to it, no emotional side to it.
I was kind of crying out for...basically some attention. Mm.
Is the aim to get back to a kind of girlfriend relationship?
I don't know what I want at the minute.
I think I'm trying to find my way of reconnecting with new people again.
And this, this has been kind of a big help for that.
It's actually been a big boost of confidence for me.
I think this is, like, a bit of fresh air.
A breath of fresh air. Do you know what I mean?
And I think without that, that could...you could spiral
down into depression.
I could... Like, from...
I don't know. That's my thing from... Oh, yeah. No, I know.
I could have spiralled out really badly.
Is it important for you that
Victoria enjoys having sex with you?
Oh, God, yeah.
I only want us to do things that we both want to do together.
I'm not interested in meeting somebody who's just...
..there to please me in that kind of way
and then leave it at that.
But at the same time, we have to acknowledge
that she would not be having sex with you
were it not for the professional arrangement.
Right? I would assume so. Yeah.
It's not something I've actually given a lot of thought to.
I don't know where I sit with her at the minute.
I was surprised at the apparent vulnerability of Victoria's client,
and also by him failing to consider
whether Victoria might not enjoy the sex.
I wondered about the impact on her
of having to impersonate a level of intimacy she didn't feel.
CHILD LAUGHS
You can have your TV on for a little bit.
Later that day, back at home,
it was time for the evening routine with the kids.
Who's in this one, then?
This is like being on a submarine, this one. Yeah!
Whoa! It's quite long, isn't it?
It's huge.
Uh-oh, there's a ninja.
He's got a special way of ninja-walking.
He's so quiet when he's ninja-walking.
VICTORIA LAUGHS
He's ninja-walked away.
Victoria had told me she planned to tell her boys
what she does when they're older,
but she's made no secret of it in the wider community.
Show me around. What have we got in here?
Among those in the know is her daughter, 14-year-old Sapphire,
who she told a year ago.
We talked a little bit downstairs, didn't we, about escorting?
What's your view of it?
I think if she wants to do it, then it's her choice.
Nobody should, like...
..not accept that, or nobody should say anything bad about it,
because it's her decision.
Do you understand why some people don't like it?
Yeah. It's just a job that people see as a negative job.
Like, if you're... If you're in a bank, that's a good job.
If you... If you're a cleaner, that's seen as a bad job.
It's just one of the jobs that people don't like.
And I think that, because she has children as well,
people are like, "That's setting a bad example for your kids."
But we don't mind.
Well, I don't mind anyway.
She's come from, like, not having a lot
to having everything that she needs, and a lot more. So...
..yeah, really proud of her.
She seems like she's a really good mum.
She is. She is a really good mum.
Bring me your Lego box.
What? What Lego box?
I left Victoria,
struck by the contrast between a happy and stable home
and the way that many would view the work that was underpinning it.
It's hard to know how much the cost of selling sex
stems from the sense of judgment it brings with it...
..but it's been suggested that younger people
may take a less critical view.
I wondered what Ashley's friends thought about her lifestyle,
and so had arranged to meet some of them at a parent's house,
where they were discussing a joint art project.
We wanted to show the extremes of, like, the sex work stuff.
Luisa is our designer.
I've been brought on... Costumes. ..just to do costumes. Yeah.
I'm not performing.
Are you curious how, um... how Ashley's found it so far?
The sex work?
Yeah, kind of.
I mean, I presume you're happy.
Yeah, I'm fine. Yeah. There you go.
If I was upset, they'd both be able to tell, for one.
And, like, they just won't pry.
Like, if I say I'm fine, they know that's just it - I'm fine.
They don't need to ask questions. So they're both very supportive.
And I've fucked her over millions of times.
So many times. I've been so horrible to her in the past.
I think a lot of people in your life have, like, come against a struggle
or something that's difficult about your friendship
and just cut you off.
And just been like, "Do you know what? I don't need it."
Are you saying that a friendship with Ashley
comes with a certain amount of drama?
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. THEY LAUGH
Hell yeah. That's putting it lightly.
No, no. That's like... That's a teaspoon.
Oh, some person in one of my other friendship groups
that I'm friends with has decided to book me for his birthday.
So I'm going to have sex with, like, one of my friends for his birthday.
It sounds potentially quite confusing,
I would have thought. No?
What's confusing? ASHLEY LAUGHS
HE SIGHS
I don't know. He's just my friend,
who's going to come around and have sex on his birthday.
I'm offering a service, he wants the service,
and that's how it's going, and nothing's going to come of it.
It's actually better doing it this way
because if there wasn't an exchange happening, like, financially,
then that would be more confusing, surely. Yeah.
And then afterwards he'll go back to being your friend? Yeah.
I guess that... I guess that can work. Yeah. I don't know.
I mean, that's sex. That's kind of what our generation are like anyway.
Really? I mean, if you look in many friendship groups,
most people have had sex with each other.
Not every friendship group, like, definitely.
Yeah. It's what happens. But I think sex now,
even compared to, like, 20 years ago is just so liberal.
Like, just like... And, like, quite meaningless to a lot of people.
Dating apps have come almost to fill the need
of how we have sex with each other in these days.
How long do you think you're going to do it for?
I can't see myself in the future having a real job.
A real job - I mean, like a nine-to-five,
is what I mean when I say real job.
Like "standard", as in nine-to-five.
Just because of, like, my head.
If I was making enough money from just doing art stuff, then fab.
But, like, I'm fine working like everyone else to get my money
to pay for things. I don't expect it to be given to me.
It's good, isn't it?
ASHLEY LAUGHS
It was reassuring to see Ashley in the midst of a caring peer group.
I was struck by their view
that sex was something that could be freely traded
between acquaintances and strangers without consequences.
Though I also had the impression
of them wanting to make a show of support
for a friend they viewed as a little bit vulnerable.
For those who are close to someone selling sex,
I could only imagine there must be a balance between,
on the one hand, respecting their choice
and, on the other, wanting to save them
from a lifestyle many still view as damaging.
And for those in a committed relationship, even more so.
In West Sussex, I was back with Caroline and Graham.
Is that all right for you, Louis?
Une noisette pour vous. Merci beaucoup.
Ca va.
Mmm. No idea what that meant.
What time is the client coming?
He's coming at ten.
What can you tell me about him?
Um, nice guy.
Middle aged. Mm-hm.
Meaning 60? 50?
Um, 50s. Mm-hm.
He's someone you've...? I've met him quite a few times.
He's a regular? He's a regular, yeah.
One other thing I wanted to just, um...
..say is, there's a song where the words really struck me
and are quite meaningful to me personally.
So I'll just quickly read them through.
"Run away," they say
No-one will love you as you are
But I won't let them break me down to dust
I know that there's a place for us
For we are glorious...
It's making me all emotional. Why's that?
When the... Why's that, babe? Come on, just...
Let me just finish it. OK, sorry.
I am bruised
I am who I'm meant to be
This is me
Look out, cos here I come
And I'm marching on to the beat I drum
I'm not scared to be seen
I make no apologies
This is me.
And... Sorry.
SHE SNIFFS
You were great.
Why does that mean something to you?
Hm? Cos, um...
..basically, for most of my life, I've hidden myself away and, um...
..I have not wanted to be in the foreground at all.
And I feel like, you know, this sort of sexual freedom
that I've moved into is the real me.
So, when I'm around, I'll often do this.
Well, I know the dress I like.
From what you've told me about him, he'll like that.
SHE SIGHS I'm ready.
Well, you have a great time.
Enjoy yourself.
With the client en route,
Graham and I left for a local pub to give them some space.
It would also be a chance to talk to him about his marriage.
When, um...
When she became a little bit emotional back at the house,
what was behind that?
She was brought up to believe that women should be seen...
Well, probably not even seen. Not seen and not heard.
And that was her upbringing,
and she just carried it on into her adult life.
I knew, for example, sexually, she was pretty, um...
..suppressed, to put it mildly. So that was an issue.
Meaning what?
Well, she just didn't want to have sex. At all? No.
So, if I'd been different,
I would have probably been a guy who would go and see escorts.
So I kept on thinking, you know, "How can I...?
"How can I initiate her? How can I...?
"Maybe she might change."
I never dreamt that Caroline would take it this far.
Really? Oh, never.
No, I didn't have the endgame in mind
that the final part of this is where Caroline would be an escort.
It sounds as though, having sort of nudged her along the way,
now she's taken off like a rocket.
And you're now in the position, slightly paradoxically, of, um...
..being less certain about where you are.
Yes. If we've had a row or if things haven't gone right,
or if I feel that I haven't been thought of
or considered in some way or another,
then I can feel something negative coming out of me.
Or I can feel maybe a bit jealous or a bit irritated.
It's... About what? What she's doing, sometimes.
Having sex with another guy? Yeah.
We'd have these great big flare-ups,
but, of course, then I would threaten...
You know, it'd be the end of our sexually free lifestyle,
the end of everything. And then, of course...
..four hours later, we'll be fine.
I want her to be absolutely successful
as a woman in her own right cos she's never been in her own right.
I want her to be happy and have pleasure.
I really do.
You know, in every way, not just sexually.
Hello, gorgeous.
How are you? Mm, good.
How was it? Yeah, great, thank you. Yeah.
Great time.
Would you like a glass of wine?
Well, sure, I'll have a little one. Why not?
So it was good, was it? Mm.
Good? Very good? Spectacular?
No, it was... Awful? Professional job?
No, no. It wasn't a professional job.
It was... It was a good time. It was, um...
..enjoyable. Mm.
Several months into filming
and I was still conflicted about the nature of the transaction
at the heart of the sexual economy.
Whether it was a choice freely made like any other
or a symptom of a society
in which vulnerable women were traded and controlled.
CAMERA CLICKS
That's better - I'm smiling.
CAMERA CLICKS
In Nottingham, Victoria had invited me to a porn shoot she'd organised,
creating online content to sell to fans and clients.
CAMERA CLICKS
OK? Better.
I can tell you're doing a terrific job. Thank you, Louis.
I'm going to go for a medium then a close.
She'd told me of a plan to do more porn
and move away from private bookings.
Did you get that? THEY LAUGH
You prefer the porn over the escorting, don't you?
Yeah. I don't have to be so close and personal to people.
Yeah. Yeah.
Give less of yourself.
Yeah, yeah, definitely.
And I'm just wondering whether,
just in general as a sensual experience,
leaving the professionalism to one side,
whether it's pleasurable.
Um, yeah. It can be.
Just not today.
It can... No... HE LAUGHS
It's so hard for me to answer this question because it's...
Oh, it's sex - I do it all day, every day.
Loitering on set, I reflected on the paradox
of leveraging the after-effects of trauma into financial opportunity...
..and whether it represented a kind of power,
or its opposite.
The same new websites
that have induced some women to enter the sexual marketplace
are also bringing that world to clients
who, in the past, might never have thought of doing it.
In Croydon, South London, I was meeting Hugh.
Hello. Hi. How are you? Fine, thank you.
Louis. Nice to meet you.
At age 16, Hugh had been diagnosed with muscular dystrophy.
He lost his virginity at 30,
but, after that, his sexual experiences had dwindled away.
Can I make you one? By all means, yes.
You don't have kids, is that right? No. Never been married?
Never been married, no. Not interested?
I know people say, "He never met the right person."
But, yeah, I just never met...
..someone who would have me. HE CHUCKLES
I mean, in the perfect world, I-I...
I've always wanted a...
It seems unfair, but I've always wanted an able-bodied girlfriend
or not so disabled that she couldn't...
..well, get on top, essentially.
OK? Yeah.
Hugh had an appointment that evening -
a carer arrived to get him ready.
One year earlier,
Hugh had set up an account on the main sex industry website.
How's it going in there?
Well, thank you, yeah.
You'd like to look your best for your date?
HUGH LAUGHS Yes.
My-my-my...appointment.
How many women have you seen since you started?
Nine.
The eldest, 51.
Youngest was about 21.
Was there a moment, or something that prompted you to take that step?
I think it was the realisation I was getting to a certain age
and that if I didn't do drastic action,
I'd go to my grave never having sex again. Mm.
Can you characterise for me how much it's meant to you?
I mean, it's pleasurable, it's expensive,
it doesn't ruin my life.
I'd rather have a girlfriend.
But it just hasn't worked out for me, for whatever reason.
Be that my disability, be that my winning personality, I don't know.
I think a lot of women...
..understandably...
..see me and put me in the "too complicated" category.
He was seeing someone he'd booked twice before -
a woman selling sex to supplement her income.
Would you say you've got to know each other a little bit?
I enjoy her company very much.
But you have to be realistic, don't you? Yeah.
About what's actually taking place.
Exactly. Which is what?
Which is what?
We're enjoying each other's company in exchange for money.
I think I would be less happy...
..if I hadn't explored this avenue.
But, um...probably...
Well, I feel better for it, yes. Mm.
There's a little bit of guilt.
I suppose paying for it was an admission of failure on my part.
I wasn't sure how to judge Hugh's choice.
I was conscious of how much I didn't know about the young woman's story.
At the same time, his desire for a life made a little more full
by the ability to buy sex seemed completely understandable.
In my time among women selling sex, the only one for whom the work
was not mainly motivated by money was Caroline.
Caroline had also been the only one to say clearly
she enjoyed sex with clients.
Hello.
Going to find my friends downstairs.
Hi. Nice to see you. You too.
But even with all the time we'd spent together, there were aspects
of her relationship with Graham I didn't really understand.
Hoping to find out more, I was meeting them again.
There's something I wanted to show you.
Go on.
Hot Wives. Yeah. You've got two there.
And who have we got here?
She looks familiar. SHE LAUGHS
That's you. Yeah. They put me on the cover.
That's nice, isn't it? Yeah. So I'm quite proud of that.
I thought that I could wear one of these.
I like that idea. Or there's this one as well.
Look - got a zip down the front.
How's it going between the two of you?
Up and down.
Are you in a good place?
Um... HE CLEARS HIS THROAT
Yes and no. It depends what time of the day you catch me.
But, I mean, how much of any of this
is to do with either insecurity or mixed feelings
or jealousy around Caroline's work?
Do you know, generally, I don't think it's that.
The best way I can say it, for me...
LOCK CLICKS ..is that...
To be continued.
Whuh-oh! GRAHAM LAUGHS
Police!
Now, we always need to do the feel test.
It's an important part. Yeah. So... What do you think?
Do you like the feel? Oh, I like that. It's nice and smooth.
I'll have a walk around.
You look gorgeous.
Yeah, I like it. Great. OK. We'll get this.
I think I've probably spent half my life
standing outside changing rooms.
What were you going to say before we were interrupted?
I want more attention from her.
I would just like to spend
more intimate communication time with Caroline.
And that's something I didn't think through -
it's started to develop inside me.
At a nearby coffee shop, the conversation moved on
to the subject of Caroline's childhood.
My upbringing was quite Victorian, but also mixed with religion.
I was brought up to believe that sex was dirty, it was wrong.
I went into our marriage with, I think, the same attitude.
And you feel that, having led this life,
or certainly had this upbringing,
where men were dictating what you should do... Yeah.
..you feel that, now, this is very different.
You are calling the shots, deciding what you want to do.
Absolutely. Yes. Yeah.
There's been a process, over the last few years particularly...
..that I've really been discovering who I am
and what I want and need.
And the experience I've had with other men
helps me have a better sex life with Graham.
You're quite happy with your sex life with Caroline?
She's everything I think I want and dream of,
which is not something I would've said a few years ago.
Forgive me for pushing a certain idea,
and I just want to get it out there,
but do you think there's a sense in which, you know,
this was a sort of fantasy that you had?
I'm as surprised as...
..as anybody could be, as to where we've landed up,
and where Caroline's ended up. Mm.
Being an escort was entirely my choice,
and Graham never at any point told me I needed to be,
or anything like that.
I'm proud of her, and I think it's amazing,
and I constantly want to be sure
that she's doing what she wants to do. Mm.
I worry far more about that than maybe you know.
Yeah. That you really want to do this. Yeah.
Well, some days I don't.
Some days I wake up and I...
I don't really feel like doing that today.
Um...
..but then, at the same time,
I think, well...
..you know, I want to be committed to doing a good job,
and I don't have anything else to do.
So, you know, I'll do it!
But then in the process of that, I'll enjoy it
so then I'll get into it.
It was incongruous,
but Caroline seemed to have gained a sense of self
from embracing a role as a sexual commodity.
Controlled in her childhood and now finding satisfaction
fulfilling the desires of men on terms that were more her own.
Graham, for his part, seemed happy to endure some insecurity
as the price of a more sexually adventurous marriage.
In a way, Caroline's age and maturity were reassuring.
It was with those who were younger
that I found myself tempted to take a more protective attitude.
At a pub near her flat in South West London,
I was meeting Ashley.
Louis!
Hello!
How are you? Good, how are you?
I'm OK. Sorry, I'm a bit sweaty, cos I'm like...
You've changed your hair again. I know!
Wow. But I look great. Nice to see you.
Nice to see you. How are you? Good. Good.
Let's go inside. Have you had a haircut?
Yes, I'm afraid so. Looks great.
You know I asked you to bring some photos. Yeah.
Did you bring them? Yeah, I brought my baby photos.
Aww, so cute. I know! I'm so cute.
Your parents were very young when they had you. Yeah, so,
I think my mum got pregnant at 15.
Really? Had me... But it wasn't like your dad was much older, though?
No, I think my dad was 16.
So, that's your dad. That's my dad.
He looks like a child himself.
1995, my dude. Was it '95?
That's when I was born.
But they didn't stay together that long, is that right?
Yeah, they stayed together till I was about three or four, I think.
So, three or four years. Yeah.
I don't ever remember them being together.
He wasn't the most...the kindest man when I was growing up,
or the most supportive.
And I've tried so hard to form a relationship with my dad.
Like, so hard, for so many years,
and I just - I'm not doing it any more.
I've given up, cos it's heartbreaking to try.
Do you know what I mean?
It's almost a cliche of women involved in sex work
that they have complicated or strained relationships...
With their father.
I don't know if it is, completely.
I can only speak for myself.
I'm so desperate for people to, like...not even like me,
just, like, acknowledge my existence,
and I think that I only see my existence
as a sum of my, like...
The pleasure that I can give other people.
No-one wants to be around me just for who I am.
People want to be around me for what I can give to them.
And, like, for most men, what I can give to them is sex.
Between the ages of six to twelve,
I was sexually abused by someone that was really close to me.
So, I think I...I'm just very hypersexualised because of that,
and I just value a lot of my, like...
That was the time that I felt wanted,
because they didn't care about me otherwise.
Oh, it was really rough.
It was really, really, really rough.
And then when he stopped,
I basically just assumed that he hated me.
Does that make sense?
So, then, when he stopped, it made...
It just made everything worse, basically.
Sorry.
But I'm over it, I think.
I say that as I cry.
I'm over it. It's fine.
Like, it happens. Shit happens.
You just have to try and turn that into something
that you can make yourself a better person with.
So I'm using that experience to not let myself be in situations
where I'm going to feel vulnerable and feel like my self-worth
is down to my sexual actions.
Does that make sense?
Are you all right? Yeah, I'm honestly fine. OK.
I'm just a big crier. Sorry.
What occurs to me is that you've got a lot going on inside your head. Mm.
I've heard you say more than once
that you don't appreciate a sort of...saviour mentality. No.
And I think I respect you too much
to presume to judge your choices, right? Yeah.
But at the same time, I'm also aware that with everything going on,
it's actually screaming out, isn't it? Yeah.
That's true. The fact that you've embraced a kind of work
that involves a lot of emotional and physical self exposure.
Yeah, 100%. You must have thought about that a lot.
Definitely, and I think that because I was just so used to it,
I don't see it as a big deal. Right.
Because... Which doesn't necessarily mean it isn't a big deal.
Yeah, exactly.
Is there part of you that's wondering whether...
..it's the right kind of work?
No, I'm fine with the work.
I think it gives you, like, a numbness.
But I think... To it. A numbness - OK, that's a good way of putting.
It's just like, I always say this to my mum,
like, I don't like sex, I like affection
and you get affection from sex,
and I seem to think that's the only way I'm going to get it,
so I'm, like, trapped in this...
But I don't think I'm going to get affection
from these men on AdultWork.
I know for a fact that it's, like, not sustainable,
and I know that that's not going to cure me.
I'm cute, aren't I?
I'm so fat - look at my cheeks!
It seemed clear Ashley was drawn to selling sex, at least in part,
because of a background of abuse and ill treatment.
How her new life would contribute to her recovery
I found almost impossible to know.
More than ever, I was struck by the difficult position
of many of those selling sex,
taking part in an economy viewed by some as immoral
and others as coerced and unhealthy...
..feeling judged on both sides.
But I was also troubled by the question
of whether they were being completely open with me
about the cost of what they did.
Back in Nottingham for one last visit,
I was with Victoria and Sapphire on an outing to the nail salon.
What shall I have?
Have a blue or something. I don't like blue.
I like blue, it looks nice on you.
Well, not silver, cos you always get silver.
I have to get pink.
I love pink, silver and white, and glitter.
But I think the two of you are quite close, aren't you?
Yeah. Yeah, we're very close, I think. Yeah.
But she's still at that age now where...
..she's got her own little life
and she wants to go out with her friends, as well. Mm.
Do you think having had the experiences you had growing up,
that that's made you more careful as a mum?
Oh, God, yeah, definitely.
I mean, Sapphire will tell you,
I've put trackers on her phone and everything, haven't I?
You're very protective -
but that's a good thing.
I know I complain about it a lot
but it is a good thing, really, isn't it?
It is, yeah.
In an alternate reality, if Sapphire was a different person,
and wanted to pursue work like you do,
adult work, what would be your view?
No, I wouldn't want that.
You know, of course I wouldn't.
It's just the judgment around it,
especially when everybody else is questioning you
and saying, you know, stuff about you...
Then you're battling with yourself
thinking, "Am I doing the right thing? Am I not?" You know.
I think that's why girls don't last long in this industry, as well.
I guess it's a whole stigma.
Goodbye!
SHE LAUGHS
See ya! Bye!
Driving back, I thought about Victoria's choices.
For all the difficulty they'd created in her life,
it was also true that they'd allowed her to give her children
an upbringing very different from the one she'd had.
Hello. Oh, thank you!
See ya!
Look what we've got!
Wait! Don't all grab.
Don't be rude. I'm going to put it on a plate for you.
They bring you a dipping sauce, as well.
That's quite handy, isn't it?
Come on. Let's go and get you in bed. Shoes off.
Come on, then. Do your teeth.
Do you want a book? Yeah.
"Paw Patrol pups love spending time playing outdoors."
Goodnight.
With the kids in bed, it was a chance to speak more candidly.
You talked about getting out of escorting...
Yeah. ..and just doing adult film and appearances,
things like that. Yeah.
Are you winding it down?
I'm being a lot more picky, yeah. Definitely.
Even, to be honest, on certain shoots and stuff like that.
I've just said, "No, I'm not doing that any more."
I don't need to do that.
Spreading myself too thinly, I'm just wearing myself out.
Doing this sort of work doesn't make you feel anything against men?
Men are just...
Well...!
Well, I always refer to them as very simple creatures, pretty much.
They're not complex, like us. They're not...
You know, they're very simple.
The majority of men are not nice!
There's a big percentage that, you know,
I don't agree with, I don't think are nice,
I don't think are respectable.
And what are you basing that on?
The fact that the way men have treated you in your personal life
or the way your clients are
or both? Both.
I think it takes a lot for me to be able to...
..I don't know, trust a man, or whatever.
When we were talking before,
there was this question of
can it be healthy sort of psychologically, I suppose?
What I hear from you is that, actually, doing sex work
is emotionally complicated.
Yeah.
I mean, ideally, I'd love a normal relationship,
you know, but, I mean, the situation I'm in at the minute...
..it's just a relationship with me and the children,
do you know what I mean?
But, erm, obviously, I don't want to be like this forever.
FOOTSTEPS UPSTAIRS
One of the kids is up!
Let me go and ask him to settle down.
Whether because of prejudice
or the unique nature of physical intimacy,
we have, for centuries, tended to judge those who trade sex for money.
My time among those working in the new sexual economy
had shown me women escaping lives of repression and abuse
who believed they were using trauma to empower themselves.
With some, I'd worried about the possibility
of making vulnerabilities worse...
..but it was also true that for at least one
faced with few other options,
it had made a precarious position more manageable
for her and her family.