1
00:00:06,375 --> 00:00:08,535
["Green, Green Grass of Home"
by Elvis Presley playing]
2
00:00:15,000 --> 00:00:18,000
♪ The old hometown looks the same ♪
3
00:00:18,083 --> 00:00:19,791
[snoring]
4
00:00:19,875 --> 00:00:21,666
♪ As I step down... ♪
5
00:00:21,750 --> 00:00:23,125
Oh, come on.
6
00:00:23,208 --> 00:00:25,833
I am bored out of my fucking mind here.
I know you're holding.
7
00:00:25,916 --> 00:00:27,541
Just give me a little something.
8
00:00:27,625 --> 00:00:30,708
Acid, shrooms, ludes,
dealer's choice, I'm not picky.
9
00:00:31,208 --> 00:00:34,333
That, or I'm gonna lick you like one
of those psychedelic frogs in the Amazon.
10
00:00:34,416 --> 00:00:35,500
Swear to God.
11
00:00:36,083 --> 00:00:38,875
♪ Down the road, I look ♪
12
00:00:38,958 --> 00:00:41,291
♪ And there runs Mary ♪
13
00:00:42,125 --> 00:00:43,958
Ugh. Damn, nothing.
14
00:00:44,041 --> 00:00:45,166
[snoring]
15
00:00:45,250 --> 00:00:46,416
[music playing on headphones]
16
00:00:46,500 --> 00:00:49,416
Have you seriously been
listening to yourself this whole trip?
17
00:00:49,500 --> 00:00:50,660
Don't know if you've noticed,
18
00:00:50,708 --> 00:00:53,500
but not a lot
of entertainment options around here.
19
00:00:54,333 --> 00:00:57,708
You know, Tom Jones does
a killer version of this song.
20
00:00:57,791 --> 00:01:00,416
I don't even know
why you bothered doing it.
21
00:01:00,500 --> 00:01:02,791
Don't you have something else
better to be doing?
22
00:01:02,875 --> 00:01:05,166
I guess I could try
licking Leary's face again.
23
00:01:05,250 --> 00:01:07,416
Tastes like old man balls, by the way.
24
00:01:07,500 --> 00:01:09,458
Thanks for the disturbing visuals.
25
00:01:10,416 --> 00:01:12,416
[psychedelic sitar music playing]
26
00:01:16,541 --> 00:01:17,833
[horse whinnies]
27
00:01:28,375 --> 00:01:30,666
[high-pitched giggling]
28
00:01:30,750 --> 00:01:33,041
[ominous music playing]
29
00:01:36,750 --> 00:01:38,666
[feedback squeals]
30
00:01:38,750 --> 00:01:41,250
- [psychedelic sitar music playing]
- [voices giggling]
31
00:01:44,500 --> 00:01:45,625
Hey, I know you, man.
32
00:01:45,708 --> 00:01:47,333
Everybody knows me.
33
00:01:47,416 --> 00:01:49,750
That's kind of how being me works, buddy.
34
00:01:49,833 --> 00:01:50,708
Now, you mind?
35
00:01:50,791 --> 00:01:52,041
No, you don't understand.
36
00:01:52,125 --> 00:01:54,250
I know the other you.
37
00:01:54,333 --> 00:01:57,333
[whispers]
I worked on you in Germany, man.
38
00:01:57,416 --> 00:01:59,333
Pretty sure you're tripping on something.
39
00:01:59,416 --> 00:02:02,166
[in normal voice]
Of course I am. It's kind of my job.
40
00:02:02,250 --> 00:02:05,416
I basically invented the whole
hallucinogenic business model.
41
00:02:05,500 --> 00:02:08,375
I'm like the Ray Kroc
of getting fucked up.
42
00:02:08,458 --> 00:02:09,916
Good luck with that.
43
00:02:10,000 --> 00:02:11,750
Now, if you'll excuse me.
44
00:02:12,791 --> 00:02:14,708
No, I know you.
45
00:02:15,333 --> 00:02:19,250
You're Tupelo. You're Project Tupelo, man.
46
00:02:19,333 --> 00:02:20,166
[grunts]
47
00:02:20,250 --> 00:02:21,541
Tupelo, man.
48
00:02:21,625 --> 00:02:23,585
[doctor] No, it's fine.
He won't remember a thing.
49
00:02:23,666 --> 00:02:24,833
[Elvis screams]
50
00:02:24,916 --> 00:02:27,375
Jesus Christ. What the hell?
51
00:02:27,458 --> 00:02:29,875
- Let me guess, flashbacks?
- What?
52
00:02:29,958 --> 00:02:31,625
[laughs] Yeah, I know.
53
00:02:31,708 --> 00:02:33,125
Those fuckers can be nasty.
54
00:02:34,000 --> 00:02:37,458
I tried to weed them out,
but I never got the formula quite right.
55
00:02:37,541 --> 00:02:40,041
Here, when you're
someplace safe and comfy,
56
00:02:40,125 --> 00:02:41,208
take one of these.
57
00:02:41,291 --> 00:02:43,625
Sugar cubes? What am I, a fucking horse?
58
00:02:43,708 --> 00:02:45,416
[laughs] Weirdly, yes.
59
00:02:45,500 --> 00:02:47,000
Sometimes.
60
00:02:47,083 --> 00:02:49,416
Oh, that's a good boy, good boy.
61
00:02:49,500 --> 00:02:51,000
Are you out of your goddamn mind?
62
00:02:51,083 --> 00:02:52,458
No, no, no, look.
63
00:02:52,541 --> 00:02:54,000
Those little magic carpet rides
64
00:02:54,083 --> 00:02:56,416
are dosed with my very own
Timothy Leary signature brand,
65
00:02:56,500 --> 00:02:59,250
organic, pharmacy-to-table, artisan LSD.
66
00:02:59,333 --> 00:03:00,893
It's the same batch I gave the Beatles.
67
00:03:00,958 --> 00:03:04,833
You do realize I'm a federal narcotics
officer, sort of, don't you?
68
00:03:04,916 --> 00:03:07,416
Oh, that bullshit Nixon photo-op?
69
00:03:07,500 --> 00:03:08,833
[laughs] Yeah, okay.
70
00:03:08,916 --> 00:03:10,500
It makes a great coffee mug.
71
00:03:10,583 --> 00:03:12,541
There's an Elvis/Nixon coffee mug?
72
00:03:12,625 --> 00:03:13,625
[chuckles]
73
00:03:13,666 --> 00:03:16,791
Wow, you need to get
a handle on your merchandising, Tupelo.
74
00:03:16,875 --> 00:03:18,291
[Elvis screaming]
75
00:03:19,041 --> 00:03:21,125
- Yeah.
- What is it? Another flashback?
76
00:03:21,208 --> 00:03:22,250
That is so weird.
77
00:03:22,333 --> 00:03:24,041
Something must be
triggering those, Tupelo.
78
00:03:24,125 --> 00:03:25,458
[screams]
79
00:03:25,541 --> 00:03:27,291
I bet it's the word "Tupelo."
80
00:03:27,375 --> 00:03:28,416
[screams]
81
00:03:28,500 --> 00:03:30,666
For God's sake,
will you stop saying "Tupelo"?
82
00:03:30,750 --> 00:03:32,208
[screams]
83
00:03:32,291 --> 00:03:33,958
Okay, that one's on you, Tu...
84
00:03:34,041 --> 00:03:35,333
[muffled dialogue]
85
00:03:35,416 --> 00:03:38,208
Listen, you have secrets deep inside you.
86
00:03:38,708 --> 00:03:42,125
Take the LSD and free your mind, brother.
87
00:03:42,208 --> 00:03:46,041
Free your mind, and your ass will follow.
88
00:03:46,125 --> 00:03:48,845
[flight attendant] Ladies and gentlemen,
please return to your seats.
89
00:03:48,916 --> 00:03:50,666
We will be landing in Memphis shortly.
90
00:03:53,041 --> 00:03:54,916
Okay, okay, listen up, people.
91
00:03:55,000 --> 00:03:58,083
When we get in the terminal,
form a perimeter around my Elvis,
92
00:03:58,166 --> 00:04:00,166
and no matter what, y'all keep moving.
93
00:04:00,250 --> 00:04:02,851
All right, whatever. As long as we stop
and grab a Goo Goo Cluster.
94
00:04:02,875 --> 00:04:04,333
I'm literally starving to death.
95
00:04:04,416 --> 00:04:05,916
Stopping's a bad idea.
96
00:04:06,000 --> 00:04:08,291
Yeah, that's when they swarm.
97
00:04:08,375 --> 00:04:09,208
Swarm?
98
00:04:09,291 --> 00:04:14,833
Swear to God, this man is like
Marvin Gaye to white people.
99
00:04:14,916 --> 00:04:17,875
I don't think the whole
swarming thing's gonna be a problem.
100
00:04:19,041 --> 00:04:21,000
Okay, now that's fucking trippy.
101
00:04:21,083 --> 00:04:23,000
Damn, my shit is good. Mwah.
102
00:04:24,291 --> 00:04:27,708
This week's the first-ever
Elvis convention at The Peabody.
103
00:04:27,791 --> 00:04:30,500
I guess that explains
all the extra mes walking around.
104
00:04:31,000 --> 00:04:33,125
Although I'm not sure it explains that.
105
00:04:37,666 --> 00:04:38,666
Welcome home, E.
106
00:04:38,708 --> 00:04:42,125
Got the Caddy waiting outside,
all shined up and ready to roll.
107
00:04:42,208 --> 00:04:46,083
Mm! These Goo Goo Clusters
are fucking amazing.
108
00:04:46,166 --> 00:04:47,958
Best thing to ever
come out of Tennessee.
109
00:04:48,041 --> 00:04:50,083
I think you're forgetting,
I came out of Tennessee.
110
00:04:50,166 --> 00:04:51,416
Mm, actually, I'm not.
111
00:04:52,500 --> 00:04:55,000
["Memphis" by Elvis Presley playing]
112
00:04:56,541 --> 00:05:00,583
♪ Long-distance information
Give me Memphis, Tennessee ♪
113
00:05:00,666 --> 00:05:02,041
[crowd screaming]
114
00:05:05,666 --> 00:05:07,125
Damn, it's good to be me.
115
00:05:11,833 --> 00:05:13,291
Listen up, all of you.
116
00:05:13,375 --> 00:05:16,375
Starting right now,
Graceland is off-limits for the weekend.
117
00:05:16,458 --> 00:05:18,375
I need some alone time with my Priscilla.
118
00:05:18,458 --> 00:05:21,333
Easy, tiger, it's not like
I want to hang out with you either.
119
00:05:21,416 --> 00:05:24,833
Professor and I are gonna
grab some ribs, see some sights.
120
00:05:24,916 --> 00:05:27,500
Oh, you got to see The Peabody ducks.
121
00:05:27,583 --> 00:05:29,375
Yeah, I read about those on the plane.
122
00:05:29,458 --> 00:05:31,125
Ducks in a hotel lobby.
123
00:05:31,208 --> 00:05:33,916
Sounds thrilling, as far as
giant health code violations go.
124
00:05:34,000 --> 00:05:35,416
I don't care what y'all do
125
00:05:35,500 --> 00:05:37,916
as long as
whatever you're doing ain't here.
126
00:05:38,000 --> 00:05:40,375
But yeah, you should
really check out the ducks.
127
00:05:41,708 --> 00:05:44,000
'Scilla, I'm home. Where are my girls?
128
00:05:44,083 --> 00:05:45,583
I'll be right down, baby.
129
00:05:45,666 --> 00:05:48,000
I had Patsy take Lisa for the weekend.
130
00:05:48,083 --> 00:05:50,458
I wanted you all to myself.
131
00:05:50,541 --> 00:05:52,416
I sure like the sound of that.
132
00:05:52,500 --> 00:05:55,041
Make yourself comfy
and put on the blindfold.
133
00:05:55,125 --> 00:05:57,291
[chuckles] I got a surprise for you.
134
00:05:57,875 --> 00:06:01,416
Lord Almighty,
I feel my temperature rising.
135
00:06:03,416 --> 00:06:05,250
[Priscilla] Take off that blindfold.
136
00:06:07,708 --> 00:06:09,958
It is seriously good to be me.
137
00:06:10,458 --> 00:06:12,500
[CeCe] Who the hell is Cowboy Jeb?
138
00:06:12,583 --> 00:06:15,958
[Bertie] Ah, sweet, beloved Cowboy Jeb.
139
00:06:16,041 --> 00:06:19,041
He had the number-one
children's show in Memphis.
140
00:06:19,125 --> 00:06:21,625
Cowboy Jeb's Jungle Gymboree!
141
00:06:22,125 --> 00:06:23,375
Everybody loved him.
142
00:06:24,125 --> 00:06:25,750
Then his show got canceled.
143
00:06:25,833 --> 00:06:28,500
Oh. If everybody loved him so much,
why'd he get canceled?
144
00:06:28,583 --> 00:06:32,500
Turns out old Jeb's idea of a jamboree
was getting blackout drunk
145
00:06:32,583 --> 00:06:36,291
and hosting wild orgies
with that fella from Hogan's Hero.
146
00:06:36,375 --> 00:06:38,166
[laughs] Okay.
147
00:06:38,250 --> 00:06:39,791
I love this guy.
148
00:06:39,875 --> 00:06:43,166
All right, so how does the chimp
fit into this Norman Rockwell painting?
149
00:06:43,250 --> 00:06:47,583
Well, it all started
when Scatter got kicked out of NASA.
150
00:06:47,666 --> 00:06:49,666
[bluegrass music playing]
151
00:06:51,833 --> 00:06:54,958
That damn fool couldn't keep
his monkey junk in his diaper.
152
00:06:55,041 --> 00:06:57,291
Knocked up one of the other space chimps.
153
00:06:57,375 --> 00:06:58,625
He was devastated.
154
00:06:58,708 --> 00:07:03,041
It took him
on a nasty spiral of drugs, drinking,
155
00:07:03,125 --> 00:07:05,375
and dumpster sex with strangers.
156
00:07:05,458 --> 00:07:06,458
[Scatter] Hmm?
157
00:07:07,000 --> 00:07:08,333
[growls]
158
00:07:11,875 --> 00:07:13,395
- [zipper rasps]
- [wet sucking sounds]
159
00:07:14,166 --> 00:07:15,726
- [groans]
- [tires squeal, car crashes]
160
00:07:15,750 --> 00:07:17,083
[steam hissing]
161
00:07:17,750 --> 00:07:21,625
[Bertie] All he ever wanted
was to be the first chimp on the moon.
162
00:07:22,208 --> 00:07:24,750
But he only made it as far as Memphis.
163
00:07:24,833 --> 00:07:26,375
[whimpering softly]
164
00:07:26,458 --> 00:07:29,000
- [gibbering]
- [Bertie] And when the money ran out,
165
00:07:29,083 --> 00:07:32,125
Scatter did photo shoots
for Barely Human magazine.
166
00:07:32,208 --> 00:07:34,208
Lordy, I pray for that monkey's soul.
167
00:07:34,291 --> 00:07:39,333
But every unholy sin he made
went to paying for his next fix.
168
00:07:41,166 --> 00:07:43,333
Jeb took him in and cleaned him up.
169
00:07:43,416 --> 00:07:45,625
[CeCe, scoffing]
Least he could do after pissing on him.
170
00:07:45,708 --> 00:07:48,708
[Bertie] He gave Scatter
a job as his sidekick,
171
00:07:48,791 --> 00:07:53,166
and that nasty-ass chimp
turned out to be a big hit with the kids.
172
00:07:53,250 --> 00:07:54,791
Things were great.
173
00:07:54,875 --> 00:07:58,833
But then the sponsors found out
about Cowboy Jeb's kinky side.
174
00:07:58,916 --> 00:08:01,083
[CeCe] And gave him a big, fat raise?
175
00:08:03,208 --> 00:08:05,375
[Bertie] Cowboy Jeb lost everything,
176
00:08:05,458 --> 00:08:07,125
ended up going bankrupt,
177
00:08:07,208 --> 00:08:10,083
and sold Scatter to Elvis for 200 bucks.
178
00:08:10,583 --> 00:08:11,791
Wow, cheap.
179
00:08:12,625 --> 00:08:14,166
How much did he pay for Bobby Ray?
180
00:08:15,083 --> 00:08:16,375
[sighs]
181
00:08:16,458 --> 00:08:18,916
- [romantic jazzy music playing]
- Baby... Baby, wait.
182
00:08:19,500 --> 00:08:22,291
Look, I got a little surprise for you.
183
00:08:22,375 --> 00:08:24,291
As sexy as you look right now,
184
00:08:24,375 --> 00:08:26,750
I was thinking
maybe we can connect on a...
185
00:08:27,416 --> 00:08:28,458
deeper level.
186
00:08:28,541 --> 00:08:31,791
Ooh, please tell me
that's lysergic acid diethylamide.
187
00:08:31,875 --> 00:08:35,083
Didn't realize
you're on a first-name basis with LSD.
188
00:08:35,791 --> 00:08:37,833
[psychedelic rock music playing]
189
00:08:40,875 --> 00:08:43,750
[Elvis] Didn't know you listened
to this kind of music either.
190
00:08:43,833 --> 00:08:45,916
Baby, it's groovy, don't you think?
191
00:08:46,000 --> 00:08:50,250
Well, it definitely fits
with the incense and black light posters,
192
00:08:50,333 --> 00:08:52,791
that I didn't even know we had,
by the way.
193
00:08:52,875 --> 00:08:57,458
I'll have you know I happen to be
a very cool and with-it chick,
194
00:08:57,541 --> 00:09:01,000
which maybe wouldn't be such a surprise
if you weren't gone so much.
195
00:09:01,083 --> 00:09:02,541
I know. I know. I know.
196
00:09:02,625 --> 00:09:03,625
I just...
197
00:09:05,125 --> 00:09:06,458
Are you sure you want to?
198
00:09:07,791 --> 00:09:09,875
I guess that answers that question.
199
00:09:13,875 --> 00:09:15,708
I'm still not feeling anything.
200
00:09:15,791 --> 00:09:17,458
Damn, me either.
201
00:09:17,541 --> 00:09:19,791
I think maybe it takes a while to kick in.
202
00:09:19,875 --> 00:09:21,833
[in gruff voice] Surprise, asshole. Ha-ha!
203
00:09:21,916 --> 00:09:23,416
How's this for kicking in?
204
00:09:23,500 --> 00:09:24,916
Buckle up, buttercup!
205
00:09:25,000 --> 00:09:26,000
What the fuck?
206
00:09:26,625 --> 00:09:27,833
[in normal voice] Exactly.
207
00:09:27,916 --> 00:09:29,458
I don't see what the big deal is.
208
00:09:29,541 --> 00:09:32,250
I thought we'd at least
see colors or something.
209
00:09:32,333 --> 00:09:33,625
[knocking on door]
210
00:09:33,708 --> 00:09:35,791
Shit, be right back.
211
00:09:41,166 --> 00:09:42,486
What the hell are you doing here?
212
00:09:42,541 --> 00:09:43,541
Well...
213
00:09:44,083 --> 00:09:46,416
- funny story.
- That I don't wanna hear.
214
00:09:46,500 --> 00:09:49,220
You know that barbecue place
you're always babbling about? Ray Ray's?
215
00:09:49,250 --> 00:09:51,625
Yeah, what does Ray Ray's
have to do with anything?
216
00:09:51,708 --> 00:09:52,868
Okay, well, here's the thing.
217
00:09:52,916 --> 00:09:55,791
Don't be mad,
but the restaurant is not there anymore.
218
00:09:55,875 --> 00:09:58,666
- What?
- I mean, as of a few minutes ago.
219
00:09:58,750 --> 00:10:00,666
I'm surprised you didn't see the fireball.
220
00:10:00,750 --> 00:10:02,083
What are you talking about?
221
00:10:02,166 --> 00:10:04,375
Those assholes followed us
back to the States,
222
00:10:04,458 --> 00:10:06,541
the ones from Algeria
who tried to take Leary.
223
00:10:06,625 --> 00:10:08,500
The Professor and I
had just ordered some ribs
224
00:10:08,583 --> 00:10:10,416
when they came
out of nowhere, and then we...
225
00:10:11,166 --> 00:10:13,666
- We kind of got into a little dust-up.
- Dust-up?
226
00:10:13,750 --> 00:10:14,750
Okay, fine, bloodbath.
227
00:10:14,833 --> 00:10:17,375
So, then you came here,
to my fucking home.
228
00:10:17,458 --> 00:10:19,666
Relax, nobody followed me.
229
00:10:20,958 --> 00:10:22,208
Wanna tell him that?
230
00:10:26,500 --> 00:10:30,125
Kill that motherfucker. Finish him.
Chew on his dead fucking eyeball.
231
00:10:30,208 --> 00:10:31,458
I'm not an animal!
232
00:10:31,541 --> 00:10:33,708
I'm not eating anybody's eyeball!
233
00:10:33,791 --> 00:10:35,916
- Uh, no one said anything, dude.
- Jesus.
234
00:10:36,625 --> 00:10:38,708
Oh. I'm losing it.
235
00:10:38,791 --> 00:10:42,083
Uh, yeah, by the way, Agent Overkill,
I'm pretty sure he's dead.
236
00:10:42,166 --> 00:10:43,166
Dear God.
237
00:10:44,375 --> 00:10:46,208
You're gonna pass on the eyeballs?
238
00:10:46,291 --> 00:10:47,666
[laughs] You little bitch.
239
00:10:47,750 --> 00:10:49,708
Jesus, you really are
a pussy motherfucker.
240
00:10:50,458 --> 00:10:53,291
I didn't mean to kill him.
I wasn't even trying to.
241
00:10:53,375 --> 00:10:55,916
Well, his pulverized head begs to differ.
242
00:10:56,000 --> 00:10:58,250
Ugh. It's like head soup.
243
00:10:58,333 --> 00:11:01,833
Would you get out of here, CeCe?
And take Professor Burn-out with you.
244
00:11:01,916 --> 00:11:05,250
Relax, we'll be out
of your weirdly precise hair in no time.
245
00:11:05,333 --> 00:11:08,250
Already called it in. TCB extraction team
will be here in a jiff.
246
00:11:08,333 --> 00:11:11,416
Screw jiff, you need to go.
Get out of here, now.
247
00:11:11,500 --> 00:11:13,166
Priscilla and I just took some LSD.
248
00:11:13,250 --> 00:11:14,500
Get the fuck out.
249
00:11:14,583 --> 00:11:19,041
Look at you being all hip and not square,
taking dangerous hallucinogenic drugs.
250
00:11:19,125 --> 00:11:21,250
I didn't take it to be cool, okay?
251
00:11:21,833 --> 00:11:23,458
Drugs aren't cool, kids.
252
00:11:24,333 --> 00:11:25,541
I'm doing research.
253
00:11:25,625 --> 00:11:27,166
Oh yeah. Yeah, I know.
254
00:11:27,250 --> 00:11:29,208
Me too, since junior high, actually.
255
00:11:29,291 --> 00:11:31,541
So, are you gonna hook me up, or...
256
00:11:31,625 --> 00:11:32,750
I got it from Leary.
257
00:11:32,833 --> 00:11:34,583
Hold the fucking phone!
258
00:11:34,666 --> 00:11:37,791
You have been holding out on me
this whole time, you piece of...
259
00:11:38,583 --> 00:11:40,500
Shit, okay, now I feel bad.
260
00:11:40,583 --> 00:11:42,583
[suspenseful music playing]
261
00:11:49,708 --> 00:11:50,750
[gunshot]
262
00:11:50,833 --> 00:11:53,125
Lucky shot, hillbilly.
263
00:11:53,208 --> 00:11:54,625
[romantic piano music playing]
264
00:11:54,708 --> 00:11:56,958
Everything okay out there?
265
00:11:57,041 --> 00:11:59,000
I think it's finally kicking in.
266
00:11:59,083 --> 00:12:00,083
Ooh!
267
00:12:00,125 --> 00:12:01,541
[children laughing]
268
00:12:03,333 --> 00:12:05,208
Make that definitely kicking in.
269
00:12:05,291 --> 00:12:06,583
[laughs]
270
00:12:06,666 --> 00:12:09,625
Paul McCartney just crawled out of the TV.
271
00:12:10,250 --> 00:12:12,375
Oh my, my...
272
00:12:12,458 --> 00:12:14,000
- my.
- Hello, love.
273
00:12:14,083 --> 00:12:16,625
It feels like I should be
freaking out right now.
274
00:12:16,708 --> 00:12:18,750
Oh relax. You'll be fine.
275
00:12:18,833 --> 00:12:20,541
You know, I've done this a million times.
276
00:12:20,625 --> 00:12:22,083
- Really?
- Oh yeah.
277
00:12:22,166 --> 00:12:24,791
People get high listening
to Beatles albums, and then blam,
278
00:12:25,375 --> 00:12:26,625
there I am.
279
00:12:26,708 --> 00:12:28,583
Ideally wearing clothes, you know.
280
00:12:28,666 --> 00:12:29,541
[Priscilla] Wait.
281
00:12:29,625 --> 00:12:32,083
People hallucinate you in the nude?
282
00:12:32,166 --> 00:12:35,041
They make me do things,
if you know what I mean.
283
00:12:35,125 --> 00:12:36,583
It's a bloody horror show, actually.
284
00:12:36,666 --> 00:12:39,958
So, are you the only
magical tour guide in these trips,
285
00:12:40,041 --> 00:12:41,708
or do other Beatles show up?
286
00:12:41,791 --> 00:12:44,916
Yeah, well, you know,
mostly people hallucinate either me...
287
00:12:45,000 --> 00:12:47,250
Or sometimes they hallucinate John...
288
00:12:47,333 --> 00:12:48,875
Or sometimes George.
289
00:12:49,875 --> 00:12:51,291
Ringo, not so much.
290
00:12:51,833 --> 00:12:55,083
You know, if the drugs are really shite,
you don't even get a Beatle.
291
00:12:55,166 --> 00:12:57,250
You get one of the fucking Monkees.
292
00:12:57,333 --> 00:12:59,000
Talk about a bloody horror show.
293
00:12:59,500 --> 00:13:02,083
[Jeb] Scatter, you old scamp, you!
294
00:13:02,166 --> 00:13:04,625
Oh, I've missed you, partner.
295
00:13:04,708 --> 00:13:06,166
[gibbers]
296
00:13:07,541 --> 00:13:09,125
I'm totally clean.
297
00:13:09,208 --> 00:13:11,250
Sober for two years now.
298
00:13:11,333 --> 00:13:13,625
They're even talking
about bringing the show back.
299
00:13:13,708 --> 00:13:16,041
- [gibbers]
- I know, right?
300
00:13:16,125 --> 00:13:19,125
I was kind of hoping you'd come back.
301
00:13:19,208 --> 00:13:20,958
Get the old team back together.
302
00:13:21,041 --> 00:13:21,875
What do you say?
303
00:13:21,958 --> 00:13:23,791
[coos]
304
00:13:24,750 --> 00:13:26,541
[crowd] Aw!
305
00:13:27,750 --> 00:13:29,708
Oh, this sucks.
306
00:13:29,791 --> 00:13:30,958
[sighs] I feel you, brother.
307
00:13:31,041 --> 00:13:33,583
You ever feel, you know, unappreciated?
308
00:13:34,083 --> 00:13:36,000
All the damn time.
309
00:13:36,083 --> 00:13:39,333
Sometimes it feels like I'm wasting
my life with this whole Elvis thing.
310
00:13:39,416 --> 00:13:41,083
You shut your damn talk hole.
311
00:13:41,166 --> 00:13:43,708
I saw you sing
at the airport Howard Johnson's.
312
00:13:43,791 --> 00:13:45,125
You are goddamn amazing.
313
00:13:45,208 --> 00:13:47,250
Don't pull my chain, man.
You really think so?
314
00:13:47,333 --> 00:13:50,291
Hey, I ain't going to shit down your neck
and tell you it's raining.
315
00:13:50,375 --> 00:13:52,000
Pretty sure I know that's not rain.
316
00:13:52,083 --> 00:13:56,125
I'm telling you, man. If I close my eyes,
I could have sworn you was Elvis.
317
00:13:56,208 --> 00:13:59,250
That's the problem.
No one closes their eyes.
318
00:13:59,333 --> 00:14:01,791
Maybe the world
just ain't ready for a Black Elvis.
319
00:14:01,875 --> 00:14:03,291
I haven't had a gig in months.
320
00:14:03,375 --> 00:14:05,416
Come on, I find that hard to believe.
321
00:14:05,916 --> 00:14:07,458
[scoffs] Believe it, brother.
322
00:14:07,541 --> 00:14:10,875
The only Elvis working less than me
is Orthodox Jewish Elvis.
323
00:14:10,958 --> 00:14:14,208
And that's only because he can't work
weekends starting sundown Friday night.
324
00:14:14,291 --> 00:14:15,500
Ain't that right, Sid?
325
00:14:15,583 --> 00:14:17,916
Shabbat, rattle and roll, my brother.
326
00:14:18,791 --> 00:14:20,125
Could be more coming here.
327
00:14:20,208 --> 00:14:22,458
Or not. Maybe try being more positive.
328
00:14:22,541 --> 00:14:23,901
- [objects crash]
- [glass tinkles]
329
00:14:23,958 --> 00:14:26,666
Okay, I'm positive
there's more coming here.
330
00:14:26,750 --> 00:14:28,625
[suspenseful music playing]
331
00:14:30,250 --> 00:14:31,833
[all yell and grunt]
332
00:14:35,083 --> 00:14:37,541
Oh! Really love
what you've done to the place.
333
00:14:37,625 --> 00:14:40,791
It's got that whole
mid-century modern warfare vibe.
334
00:14:40,875 --> 00:14:41,916
Who's your deco?
335
00:14:47,208 --> 00:14:48,500
Oh! Good call.
336
00:14:48,583 --> 00:14:51,708
Yes, I didn't like
that coffee table either, hideous.
337
00:14:51,791 --> 00:14:54,458
Shut the fuck up, asshole!
338
00:14:54,541 --> 00:14:57,750
Again, weird guy, didn't say anything.
339
00:14:57,833 --> 00:15:00,291
I wasn't talking to you.
I was talking to him.
340
00:15:00,375 --> 00:15:02,333
[laughs] She can't see me, Einstein.
341
00:15:02,416 --> 00:15:05,708
Do you not know how LSD trips work?
342
00:15:06,583 --> 00:15:09,041
[CeCe] Okay, cupcake,
how the fuck did you follow us?
343
00:15:09,916 --> 00:15:12,750
With the tracker
you left in our submarine.
344
00:15:12,833 --> 00:15:14,541
Thank you for that.
345
00:15:14,625 --> 00:15:15,458
Don't look at me.
346
00:15:15,541 --> 00:15:18,083
You're the one
who left the tracker on the sub, dumbass.
347
00:15:18,166 --> 00:15:19,958
Doesn't mean I want you looking at me.
348
00:15:20,041 --> 00:15:23,375
You have no idea what kind
of shitstorm is coming your way.
349
00:15:23,458 --> 00:15:25,041
We are legion.
350
00:15:25,125 --> 00:15:27,208
Uh-oh, sounds like
you fucked up, superspy,
351
00:15:27,291 --> 00:15:29,083
bringing your dirty work home with you.
352
00:15:29,791 --> 00:15:31,208
Wife's gonna be pissed.
353
00:15:31,291 --> 00:15:33,541
I'd be nervous if I were you,
and not just because
354
00:15:33,625 --> 00:15:36,375
Paul fucking McCartney's trying
to get in her pants in your basement.
355
00:15:36,458 --> 00:15:38,875
Talk about a British invasion.
356
00:15:38,958 --> 00:15:40,625
Side note, you may wanna duck now.
357
00:15:40,708 --> 00:15:42,375
[gunfire]
358
00:15:44,583 --> 00:15:46,083
Ooh-whee, I'm pretty!
359
00:15:46,833 --> 00:15:48,250
[plays flurry of notes]
360
00:15:48,333 --> 00:15:51,666
- Now, let's boogie-woogie, motherfucker.
- [swinging rock music playing]
361
00:15:51,750 --> 00:15:53,541
- [punches landing]
- [Paul McCartney laughs]
362
00:15:53,625 --> 00:15:55,385
[Paul McCartney]
Yeah, you know, great times.
363
00:15:55,416 --> 00:15:58,166
I did this in Hamburg once,
but it wasn't on a Twister board.
364
00:16:05,666 --> 00:16:09,333
I can't believe I'm gonna die
in your tacky jungle fantasy room.
365
00:16:09,416 --> 00:16:10,625
Tacky?
366
00:16:10,708 --> 00:16:14,625
What? What? What, like your jungle room's
way more refined or something?
367
00:16:14,708 --> 00:16:15,958
That's just it.
368
00:16:16,041 --> 00:16:18,625
No one else has a fucking jungle room.
369
00:16:19,750 --> 00:16:22,041
Uh, the waterfall's a tad much, King.
370
00:16:23,791 --> 00:16:26,375
Oh, you still don't get
how LSD works, do you?
371
00:16:26,458 --> 00:16:27,583
[grunts]
372
00:16:29,791 --> 00:16:31,666
So, this is what dying's like.
373
00:16:32,416 --> 00:16:33,750
Get used to it.
374
00:16:33,833 --> 00:16:35,500
You're in TCB, baby.
375
00:16:35,583 --> 00:16:39,083
You have a bright future in being dead.
376
00:16:42,125 --> 00:16:43,916
[indistinct chatter]
377
00:16:44,791 --> 00:16:46,041
[yells]
378
00:16:47,791 --> 00:16:50,041
I'm usually the peace and love guy
on these trips,
379
00:16:50,125 --> 00:16:53,291
but, uh, this gratuitous violence
is actually a nice change of pace.
380
00:16:53,375 --> 00:16:55,750
Ah! God, I love your accent.
381
00:16:58,791 --> 00:17:02,291
'Scilla, that was incredible.
Where'd you learn to do all that?
382
00:17:02,375 --> 00:17:04,166
I've been taking karate lessons,
383
00:17:04,250 --> 00:17:07,000
something you would know
if you were around more often.
384
00:17:07,083 --> 00:17:10,291
Ah, I "sense a"
trouble in paradise, pretty boy.
385
00:17:11,250 --> 00:17:12,458
Get it? [chuckles]
386
00:17:12,541 --> 00:17:14,041
Sense, sensei...
387
00:17:14,125 --> 00:17:16,000
You get the wordplay, anybody?
388
00:17:18,958 --> 00:17:21,833
How the hell am I gonna
explain all this to Priscilla, huh?
389
00:17:21,916 --> 00:17:24,125
Well, she's tripping her ass off,
so I wouldn't worry.
390
00:17:24,208 --> 00:17:26,500
And that's exactly why
you shouldn't eat meat.
391
00:17:26,583 --> 00:17:28,833
Those poor animals.
392
00:17:28,916 --> 00:17:31,041
- [groaning softly]
- [children laughing distantly]
393
00:17:31,541 --> 00:17:32,916
I'm serious.
394
00:17:33,000 --> 00:17:35,250
My house looks like a goddamn war zone.
395
00:17:35,333 --> 00:17:36,583
TCB has a cleanup crew.
396
00:17:36,666 --> 00:17:40,000
They'll get this place back
to all its cheesy splendor in no time.
397
00:17:40,083 --> 00:17:43,833
Um, side note,
we might want to take care of that first.
398
00:17:43,916 --> 00:17:46,666
If you follow us, she dies.
399
00:17:46,750 --> 00:17:48,750
[ominous music playing]
400
00:17:51,208 --> 00:17:52,208
[engine revs]
401
00:17:54,416 --> 00:17:56,541
Mind if I appropriate
this side of your neck?
402
00:17:56,625 --> 00:17:57,833
Get the hell off of me!
403
00:17:57,916 --> 00:18:00,208
Come on, man,
it's The Thing with Two Heads.
404
00:18:00,291 --> 00:18:02,083
Rosey Grier and Ray Milland.
405
00:18:02,166 --> 00:18:03,166
Great fucking movie.
406
00:18:03,250 --> 00:18:04,250
Didn't see it.
407
00:18:04,291 --> 00:18:05,666
Oh! Fucking classic.
408
00:18:05,750 --> 00:18:09,416
They transplant a white bigot's head
onto a Black man's body,
409
00:18:09,500 --> 00:18:11,875
and brilliance ensues, right?
410
00:18:11,958 --> 00:18:13,000
Somehow, I doubt that.
411
00:18:13,083 --> 00:18:14,416
Oh. Well. Excuse me.
412
00:18:14,500 --> 00:18:18,333
It might not reach the cinematic heights
of that piece-of-shit nun movie you made,
413
00:18:18,416 --> 00:18:19,416
but still.
414
00:18:22,041 --> 00:18:23,125
[grunts]
415
00:18:24,541 --> 00:18:26,375
[glass shatters]
416
00:18:28,791 --> 00:18:29,916
[tires squeal]
417
00:18:30,000 --> 00:18:31,708
[upbeat rockabilly music playing]
418
00:18:37,666 --> 00:18:40,166
I'm going after Priscilla.
You get the other two.
419
00:18:40,250 --> 00:18:41,583
You're not the boss of me.
420
00:18:41,666 --> 00:18:43,186
But yeah, okay, it sounds like a plan.
421
00:18:56,583 --> 00:18:58,125
[guests scream]
422
00:19:02,916 --> 00:19:04,333
[growls]
423
00:19:07,041 --> 00:19:08,125
[shrieks]
424
00:19:09,833 --> 00:19:12,000
[yells]
425
00:19:17,541 --> 00:19:18,708
[gunshot]
426
00:19:20,208 --> 00:19:21,791
[all scream]
427
00:19:21,875 --> 00:19:22,791
[elevator dings]
428
00:19:22,875 --> 00:19:24,375
[quacking]
429
00:19:32,708 --> 00:19:35,583
Okay, I get it.
They're pretty fucking great.
430
00:19:36,500 --> 00:19:37,833
[feedback squeals]
431
00:19:37,916 --> 00:19:41,041
Listen up,
some assholes kidnapped Priscilla.
432
00:19:41,125 --> 00:19:45,375
I got a brand-new Cadillac for whoever
grabs that fucker by the back door.
433
00:19:45,458 --> 00:19:46,791
You got this, my man.
434
00:19:47,291 --> 00:19:48,458
Hell yeah, I got this.
435
00:19:49,666 --> 00:19:51,916
Here's a song by Mr. Chuck Berry.
436
00:19:52,000 --> 00:19:53,000
Hit it, boys.
437
00:19:53,041 --> 00:19:54,416
[band playing "Memphis"]
438
00:19:54,500 --> 00:19:58,166
There you go, nice gesture letting
a brother show you how it's done.
439
00:19:58,250 --> 00:20:03,291
You do know that Chuck Berry is the true
king of rock and roll, right, King?
440
00:20:03,375 --> 00:20:06,916
I can't stress enough
how much I need you to shut the hell up.
441
00:20:07,000 --> 00:20:10,916
♪ Long-distance information
Give me Memphis, Tennessee ♪
442
00:20:12,500 --> 00:20:15,500
- Did they hurt you?
- I'm fine. Just go.
443
00:20:15,583 --> 00:20:17,708
You have to be the hero. I get it.
444
00:20:18,333 --> 00:20:19,333
[lips smack]
445
00:20:22,791 --> 00:20:25,166
Elvis, the schmucks went that way.
446
00:20:25,250 --> 00:20:27,125
Thanks, man. Dig the sideburns.
447
00:20:27,208 --> 00:20:28,833
- [whip cracking]
- [muffled moan]
448
00:20:28,916 --> 00:20:30,000
[crowd yelling angrily]
449
00:20:31,125 --> 00:20:34,291
♪ Oh help me, information ♪
450
00:20:34,375 --> 00:20:36,791
♪ Get in touch with my Marie... ♪
451
00:20:37,625 --> 00:20:38,625
[crowd shouting]
452
00:20:39,208 --> 00:20:40,458
[engine revs]
453
00:20:42,000 --> 00:20:45,333
Whoa! Goddamn!
Who do you think you are? Elvis Knelvis?
454
00:20:48,916 --> 00:20:53,291
Oh man, I know I've been giving you shit,
but that was pretty badass.
455
00:20:53,833 --> 00:20:55,083
[grunts]
456
00:20:55,166 --> 00:20:56,958
[suspenseful music playing]
457
00:21:03,833 --> 00:21:05,750
Finish him. Kill this asshole.
458
00:21:05,833 --> 00:21:06,916
[Elvis] Ah.
459
00:21:07,000 --> 00:21:07,916
I don't...
460
00:21:08,000 --> 00:21:09,875
[stammers] I don't know.
461
00:21:09,958 --> 00:21:11,666
I don't know what's real anymore.
462
00:21:11,750 --> 00:21:13,750
Ain't nothing more real
than a memorable beheading.
463
00:21:13,833 --> 00:21:14,875
Let's get shit done.
464
00:21:14,958 --> 00:21:16,541
[Elvis] I don't have to kill him.
465
00:21:16,625 --> 00:21:18,541
Maybe he's got a wife, kids...
466
00:21:18,625 --> 00:21:21,083
Motherfucker, you have a wife and kid.
467
00:21:21,166 --> 00:21:24,125
This animal came to your house,
held a gun to your wife's head.
468
00:21:24,208 --> 00:21:26,416
What if your little girl had been home?
Kill him!
469
00:21:27,041 --> 00:21:29,041
The extra head's got a point, honey.
470
00:21:29,125 --> 00:21:30,541
Maybe you should kill him.
471
00:21:30,625 --> 00:21:32,208
Normally I'd say kill him, boss,
472
00:21:32,291 --> 00:21:35,000
but, hell, I've hardly
been in this episode, so...
473
00:21:35,083 --> 00:21:36,500
Don't listen to Gomer Pyle.
474
00:21:36,583 --> 00:21:39,416
You're a killing machine.
You're my killing machine.
475
00:21:39,500 --> 00:21:40,625
No, goddamn it. No!
476
00:21:41,208 --> 00:21:42,041
No, I'm not.
477
00:21:42,125 --> 00:21:44,333
We don't...
478
00:21:44,416 --> 00:21:47,541
- We don't have to kill him.
- Don't have to kill him!
479
00:21:47,625 --> 00:21:49,625
♪ Goulet, Goulet, Goulet ♪
480
00:21:49,708 --> 00:21:53,125
Yes, we do!
481
00:21:54,708 --> 00:21:56,208
[Elvis screams]
482
00:21:58,375 --> 00:21:59,875
[blades slice]
483
00:22:00,875 --> 00:22:02,750
Damn, it's fucked up to be me.
484
00:22:02,833 --> 00:22:04,708
[upbeat bluegrass music playing]
485
00:22:06,791 --> 00:22:08,851
[Priscilla]
So, how long do you think this LSD lasts?
486
00:22:08,875 --> 00:22:11,125
Can't be over soon enough for me.
487
00:22:11,208 --> 00:22:13,500
Oh look, it's Scatter.
488
00:22:13,583 --> 00:22:14,791
He looks so cute.
489
00:22:15,666 --> 00:22:17,833
What? Hey, I thought I was the cute one.
490
00:22:17,916 --> 00:22:20,125
Oh fuck, look at the time. I gotta go.
491
00:22:20,208 --> 00:22:22,208
I'm late for Jack Nicholson's acid trip.
492
00:22:24,416 --> 00:22:27,041
Trust me, it gets dark fast.
493
00:22:31,000 --> 00:22:34,666
Now, you know that monkey was better off
with that freakshow cowboy, right?
494
00:22:34,750 --> 00:22:37,500
Just like I was better off
before you, asshole.
495
00:22:38,083 --> 00:22:40,125
[Bertie] Exactly how I found them.
496
00:22:40,208 --> 00:22:42,958
They've been sitting like that
going on 12 hours now.
497
00:22:43,041 --> 00:22:44,125
Jesus!
498
00:22:44,208 --> 00:22:46,083
And what the hell happened upstairs?
499
00:22:46,166 --> 00:22:48,958
Looks like I missed a hell of a party,
which is not like me.
500
00:22:49,041 --> 00:22:50,625
Well, that's the damnedest thing.
501
00:22:50,708 --> 00:22:51,958
You got to see this.
502
00:22:52,041 --> 00:22:56,875
That boy was beating his own self up
and shooting up his own goddamn house.
503
00:22:56,958 --> 00:22:58,916
What the hell did you give him?
504
00:22:59,000 --> 00:23:01,208
Ah, one of my custom blends.
505
00:23:01,291 --> 00:23:04,583
An earthy, full-bodied acid
with an oaky vanilla character.
506
00:23:05,166 --> 00:23:07,083
I'm surprised he's still alive, actually.
507
00:23:07,166 --> 00:23:08,291
[CeCe] Got any more?
508
00:23:08,375 --> 00:23:10,583
Oh come on. I'm bored out of my mind here.
509
00:23:10,666 --> 00:23:13,250
I know you're holding.
Just give me a little something.
510
00:23:15,666 --> 00:23:17,833
[upbeat rockabilly music playing]