1
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{\an8}‪(南越德浪河谷
‪1971年1月15日)

2
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‪他媽的,你能相信嗎?

3
00:00:24,001 --> 00:00:27,834
‪後勤混蛋搞錯了,只給我一隻襪子

4
00:00:28,418 --> 00:00:31,918
‪搞錯?嘿,美軍不會犯錯,德魯

5
00:00:33,001 --> 00:00:35,709
‪是嗎?只有一隻襪子要怎麼穿?

6
00:00:35,709 --> 00:00:38,626
‪借我你妹的照片,我示範你看

7
00:00:38,626 --> 00:00:39,918
‪去你的

8
00:00:56,501 --> 00:00:59,293
‪勞軍演唱會,能不能介紹一下?

9
00:00:59,293 --> 00:01:01,376
‪很榮幸能為我們的弟兄們演奏

10
00:01:01,376 --> 00:01:03,959
‪你覺得這場戰爭怎麼樣?

11
00:01:03,959 --> 00:01:08,043
‪我要保留我的個人觀點

12
00:01:08,043 --> 00:01:10,709
‪我只是個藝人,所以不方便評論

13
00:01:12,043 --> 00:01:12,918
‪跟我來

14
00:01:12,918 --> 00:01:15,668
‪-你為什麼不回答問題?
‪-戰爭的問題?

15
00:01:15,668 --> 00:01:18,501
‪有幾個原因
‪大部分都是因為這跟別人無關

16
00:01:18,501 --> 00:01:21,668
‪別這樣,你是個大人物
‪大家都想知道你的想法

17
00:01:21,668 --> 00:01:23,418
‪我從來不懂為什麼

18
00:01:23,418 --> 00:01:26,126
‪我可以幫你打草稿,怎麼樣?

19
00:01:26,126 --> 00:01:27,834
‪我們似乎在鬼打牆

20
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‪考慮一下

21
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‪考慮完了

22
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‪我還是不想說
‪但如果有人想討論表演...

23
00:01:34,959 --> 00:01:38,584
‪說到這,她們是不是超正點的?

24
00:01:39,168 --> 00:01:40,418
‪誰?脫衣舞孃?

25
00:01:40,418 --> 00:01:42,418
‪請稱她們為舞者

26
00:01:42,418 --> 00:01:45,043
‪演唱會的舞者,服裝是我自己設計的

27
00:01:45,043 --> 00:01:49,001
‪你覺得讓那些女人
‪出現在美國大兵面前是個好主意?

28
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‪他們獨自在叢林裡生活了一年耶

29
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‪這叫作秀

30
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‪不,那其實是反問句

31
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‪你好,我打擾兩位了嗎?

32
00:01:59,959 --> 00:02:02,168
‪羅伯特高勒特在這裡做什麼?

33
00:02:02,168 --> 00:02:04,209
‪他沒告訴你嗎?

34
00:02:04,209 --> 00:02:06,418
‪我也在勞軍演唱會名單上

35
00:02:06,418 --> 00:02:08,293
‪有些人認為是重頭戲

36
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‪軍人受的折磨還不夠嗎?

37
00:02:10,793 --> 00:02:15,126
‪我想獲得東尼獎肯定的
‪百老匯明星正是醫生開的良方

38
00:02:15,126 --> 00:02:17,084
‪那要看是什麼醫生

39
00:02:17,084 --> 00:02:20,876
‪來我家除草的小子,笨得要命

40
00:02:20,876 --> 00:02:23,959
‪智商只有六年級,他是你的歌迷

41
00:02:23,959 --> 00:02:27,334
‪他前幾天在廣播裡聽你的搖滾樂

42
00:02:27,334 --> 00:02:28,709
‪朗朗上口,有些...

43
00:02:28,709 --> 00:02:32,543
‪還記得是18首冠軍單曲中哪一首嗎?

44
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‪聽不出來,歌詞有狗或監獄之類的

45
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‪整個分不清楚

46
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‪-謝了
‪-不客氣

47
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‪別這麼說,謝謝你提醒我
‪你為什麼老是惹我不爽

48
00:02:45,251 --> 00:02:50,293
‪嫉妒會以神秘的方式呈現,對吧?

49
00:02:50,293 --> 00:02:51,918
‪趁我還沒忘記

50
00:02:51,918 --> 00:02:55,834
‪歡迎來到TCB,很高興有你加入

51
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‪等等,真的嗎?

52
00:02:56,918 --> 00:02:59,876
‪才怪,他們叫我這麼說

53
00:03:01,168 --> 00:03:02,668
‪我才不鳥你

54
00:03:04,293 --> 00:03:05,668
‪居然有高勒特?

55
00:03:05,668 --> 00:03:08,001
‪你管理的是什麼半吊子組織?

56
00:03:08,001 --> 00:03:10,251
‪我們現在是半吊子?有進步

57
00:03:10,251 --> 00:03:11,751
‪對了,我喜歡脫衣舞孃

58
00:03:11,751 --> 00:03:14,001
‪她們不是脫衣舞孃,媽的

59
00:03:14,001 --> 00:03:16,793
‪對啦,抱歉,“醫學生”

60
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‪特務貓王

61
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‪德浪河谷

62
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{\an8}‪上週幾名軍人被自己人射傷
‪狀況不尋常

63
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{\an8}‪非常不尋常

64
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{\an8}‪打擾我介紹任務
‪我是怎麼跟你說的?

65
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{\an8}‪千萬別這麼做

66
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{\an8}‪還有呢?

67
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{\an8}‪除非我不喜歡我的左睪丸,長官

68
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{\an8}‪這似乎很直白

69
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{\an8}‪也很明確

70
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{\an8}‪好,我說到哪了?對,被自己人射傷

71
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{\an8}‪那起事件加上訊號攔截

72
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{\an8}‪讓我們相信
‪你們在阿爾塔蒙特看到的武器在這裡

73
00:03:55,834 --> 00:03:57,793
{\an8}‪我們到底要應付什麼?

74
00:03:57,793 --> 00:04:00,376
{\an8}‪這種聲波武器會讓人變得

75
00:04:00,376 --> 00:04:02,084
{\an8}‪-野蠻
‪-野蠻?

76
00:04:02,084 --> 00:04:03,626
{\an8}‪對那些敏感的人來說

77
00:04:03,626 --> 00:04:06,168
{\an8}‪但好消息是,不是所有人都會受影響

78
00:04:06,168 --> 00:04:08,001
{\an8}‪效果有五成

79
00:04:08,001 --> 00:04:09,793
{\an8}‪只有一半的人會受影響

80
00:04:09,793 --> 00:04:11,209
{\an8}‪差不多吧

81
00:04:11,209 --> 00:04:12,168
{\an8}‪粗略的數字

82
00:04:12,168 --> 00:04:14,543
{\an8}‪你似乎很瞭解這個武器

83
00:04:14,543 --> 00:04:18,126
{\an8}‪我們幾年前試驗過這項技術

84
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{\an8}‪操控聲波,繞過有意識的心智

85
00:04:20,918 --> 00:04:22,834
{\an8}‪並控制潛意識

86
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{\an8}‪等等,你是在說心智控制嗎?

87
00:04:25,043 --> 00:04:27,293
{\an8}‪對,他媽的好主意

88
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{\an8}‪我也是這麼說的

89
00:04:29,168 --> 00:04:31,959
{\an8}‪但我們遇到了一些問題
‪不得不終止計劃

90
00:04:31,959 --> 00:04:34,793
{\an8}‪然後有人偷走你的玩具
‪把它變成武器?

91
00:04:34,793 --> 00:04:37,709
{\an8}‪沒錯,你們兩個要去拿回來

92
00:04:37,709 --> 00:04:41,001
{\an8}‪你們要搭船前往上游
‪到時會有TCB聯絡人接應

93
00:04:41,001 --> 00:04:41,918
{\an8}‪聯絡人是誰?

94
00:04:41,918 --> 00:04:44,543
{\an8}‪那是個...驚喜

95
00:04:44,543 --> 00:04:48,918
{\an8}‪顯然不喜歡左睪丸的多爾說得對

96
00:04:49,418 --> 00:04:50,543
{\an8}‪你們去了就知道

97
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{\an8}‪只要我來得及回來參加青商會

98
00:04:53,251 --> 00:04:54,668
{\an8}‪青商會是什麼?

99
00:04:54,668 --> 00:04:58,293
{\an8}‪青年商會,簡稱青商會

100
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{\an8}‪他們要頒年度最佳青年獎給我

101
00:05:00,834 --> 00:05:03,126
{\an8}‪原因很明顯

102
00:05:03,126 --> 00:05:04,834
{\an8}‪我們會盡全力送你過去

103
00:05:04,834 --> 00:05:08,251
{\an8}‪很好,因為我不可能不去,大哥

104
00:05:08,251 --> 00:05:09,668
‪真奇怪

105
00:05:10,209 --> 00:05:13,168
‪那聽起來像是你在告訴我該怎麼做

106
00:05:13,168 --> 00:05:14,751
‪很高興我們的想法一致

107
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‪先把話說清楚

108
00:05:17,001 --> 00:05:18,834
‪這裡由我發號施令

109
00:05:18,834 --> 00:05:20,584
‪你替我工作,貓王

110
00:05:20,584 --> 00:05:23,376
‪我想你把我和那傢伙搞混了

111
00:05:23,376 --> 00:05:25,376
‪你老愛拿他的睪丸來說嘴

112
00:05:25,876 --> 00:05:28,293
‪睪丸的事的確有點過頭了

113
00:05:34,043 --> 00:05:35,251
‪爽啦!

114
00:05:35,251 --> 00:05:36,876
‪(天生殺人狂)

115
00:05:36,876 --> 00:05:41,584
‪天啊!能不能拜託你別害死我們?

116
00:05:41,584 --> 00:05:42,501
‪放輕鬆

117
00:05:42,501 --> 00:05:45,584
‪讓巴比雷開心一下吧,他不會害死人

118
00:05:45,584 --> 00:05:48,959
‪沒錯,我們會被那混帳東西害死

119
00:05:50,043 --> 00:05:51,834
‪太座打來了

120
00:05:56,209 --> 00:05:57,918
‪嘿,親愛的,妳在忙什麼?

121
00:05:57,918 --> 00:05:59,043
‪沒什麼

122
00:05:59,043 --> 00:06:01,334
‪只是在準備一人份晚餐

123
00:06:01,334 --> 00:06:04,709
‪對不起,我知道我最近經常不在家

124
00:06:04,709 --> 00:06:06,751
‪我保證會找時間過兩人世界

125
00:06:06,751 --> 00:06:08,543
‪你要說話算話喔

126
00:06:08,543 --> 00:06:09,459
‪一定會

127
00:06:13,001 --> 00:06:14,418
‪可惡,史卡特!

128
00:06:14,418 --> 00:06:16,459
‪讓那可憐的東西解脫吧

129
00:06:18,501 --> 00:06:21,084
‪-好好享受吧
‪-好的,親愛的

130
00:06:22,126 --> 00:06:23,918
‪一開始不太順利

131
00:06:23,918 --> 00:06:25,126
‪小心

132
00:06:29,126 --> 00:06:30,251
‪謝謝你相助

133
00:06:30,251 --> 00:06:31,751
‪老實說,多爾

134
00:06:31,751 --> 00:06:33,793
‪由於你的工作和貼身伺候我

135
00:06:33,793 --> 00:06:37,251
{\an8}‪你死於非命的機率簡直爆表

136
00:06:37,251 --> 00:06:39,168
‪但今天不行,兄弟,那不在計劃內

137
00:06:39,168 --> 00:06:41,709
‪好,說到我的工作

138
00:06:41,709 --> 00:06:44,293
‪你有沒有考慮要讓我...

139
00:06:44,293 --> 00:06:46,793
‪-我們討論過了,多爾
‪-沒錯,長官,可是...

140
00:06:46,793 --> 00:06:48,626
‪我知道你想當外勤特務

141
00:06:48,626 --> 00:06:51,709
‪但我需要你那像強迫症般的組織能力

142
00:06:51,709 --> 00:06:52,793
‪助我一臂之力

143
00:06:52,793 --> 00:06:56,626
‪謝謝,長官,但當特務是我的夢想

144
00:06:57,459 --> 00:06:59,251
‪那就繼續做夢吧,有夢最美

145
00:06:59,251 --> 00:07:00,459
‪因為在現實生活中

146
00:07:00,459 --> 00:07:04,418
‪任何有理智的人都會認為
‪你不是外勤特務的料

147
00:07:04,418 --> 00:07:06,126
‪-抱歉,兄弟
‪-長官,請容我...

148
00:07:06,126 --> 00:07:08,793
‪不是因為你有孩童般的肌肉量

149
00:07:08,793 --> 00:07:11,459
‪而是因為你毫無警覺心,多爾

150
00:07:11,459 --> 00:07:13,709
‪外勤特務必須做好萬全的準備

151
00:07:13,709 --> 00:07:16,459
‪要是有飛碟降落,太空龍衝出來

152
00:07:16,459 --> 00:07:18,709
‪拿假老二打死你

153
00:07:18,709 --> 00:07:21,251
‪你必須要有先見之明

154
00:07:23,126 --> 00:07:25,626
‪老實說,先生
‪我想我可能會讓你大吃一驚

155
00:07:30,334 --> 00:07:32,459
‪話說回來,你可能不會

156
00:07:34,251 --> 00:07:37,043
‪妳知道我們要見的人是誰嗎?

157
00:07:37,043 --> 00:07:39,501
‪不,希望他們知道自己在做什麼

158
00:07:39,501 --> 00:07:40,793
‪不會有事的

159
00:07:40,793 --> 00:07:41,709
‪是嗎?

160
00:07:41,709 --> 00:07:44,834
‪你看到周遭的綠色東西?
‪他媽的死亡陷阱

161
00:07:44,834 --> 00:07:49,001
‪別激動,西西,東西的西
‪這只是叢林,很久以前就有了

162
00:07:49,001 --> 00:07:50,376
‪斑疹傷寒也是

163
00:07:50,376 --> 00:07:53,751
‪順便提醒一下
‪半數蚊子肯定是帶原體

164
00:07:53,751 --> 00:07:57,501
‪嘿,你知道那很有可能是機油吧?

165
00:07:58,793 --> 00:08:01,709
‪讓他喝吧,這艘船開起來很順

166
00:08:01,709 --> 00:08:04,626
‪靠,要是我知道軍隊有這麼屌的裝備

167
00:08:04,626 --> 00:08:06,293
‪我就不會逃避兵役了

168
00:08:06,293 --> 00:08:07,459
‪你說什麼?

169
00:08:07,459 --> 00:08:09,501
‪那傢伙抱膝跳水是不是很厲害?

170
00:08:09,501 --> 00:08:10,709
‪你逃避兵役?

171
00:08:10,709 --> 00:08:12,543
‪聽我說

172
00:08:12,543 --> 00:08:16,293
‪我有三個表親被徵召
‪回來的只有兩個半

173
00:08:16,293 --> 00:08:17,626
‪真遺憾

174
00:08:17,626 --> 00:08:21,209
‪我驗出淋病後,他們根本不想找我

175
00:08:21,209 --> 00:08:22,793
‪你假裝得了淋病?

176
00:08:22,793 --> 00:08:27,001
‪不,我花錢召妓,直到我得到淋病

177
00:08:27,001 --> 00:08:28,543
‪花的時間比想像中還要久

178
00:08:28,543 --> 00:08:29,876
‪我對你很失望

179
00:08:29,876 --> 00:08:31,501
‪拜託,你怎麼能怪他?

180
00:08:31,501 --> 00:08:33,126
‪這場戰爭是個爛主意

181
00:08:33,126 --> 00:08:36,834
‪從什麼時候開始
‪在世界各地散佈自由是爛主意?

182
00:08:36,834 --> 00:08:39,584
‪自從幾年前爭取自由的戰爭結束後

183
00:08:39,584 --> 00:08:41,876
‪現在只是昏庸的政客

184
00:08:41,876 --> 00:08:44,251
‪將剛才看到的跳水帥哥

185
00:08:44,251 --> 00:08:46,709
‪抓去屠宰場送死

186
00:08:46,709 --> 00:08:48,918
‪也許妳該搭下一班飛機回家

187
00:08:48,918 --> 00:08:53,084
‪找一份把美國國旗燒到爽的工作

188
00:08:54,376 --> 00:08:56,834
‪不,可惡,那工作不是真的

189
00:08:57,959 --> 00:08:59,168
‪告訴我你看到什麼

190
00:08:59,668 --> 00:09:01,709
‪乍看之下

191
00:09:01,709 --> 00:09:03,876
‪低碳水的菜有點少

192
00:09:03,876 --> 00:09:06,834
‪不是叫你看菜單,笨蛋
‪警覺心,記得嗎?

193
00:09:06,834 --> 00:09:08,543
‪你的周遭有什麼?

194
00:09:08,543 --> 00:09:10,459
‪也對

195
00:09:11,251 --> 00:09:13,418
‪附近有陸軍在喝...

196
00:09:13,418 --> 00:09:15,959
‪-他們是海軍
‪-真的嗎?很難分辨

197
00:09:15,959 --> 00:09:17,918
‪-最好別跟他們說
‪-知道了

198
00:09:18,501 --> 00:09:19,459
‪拿來,白痴

199
00:09:20,501 --> 00:09:21,834
‪不做筆記,有道理

200
00:09:21,834 --> 00:09:25,251
‪其中一名海軍不只是海軍

201
00:09:25,251 --> 00:09:26,209
‪是喔

202
00:09:27,126 --> 00:09:28,126
‪等等,然後呢?

203
00:09:28,126 --> 00:09:30,084
‪其中一位是我們的秘密聯絡人

204
00:09:30,084 --> 00:09:31,626
‪讚啦!哪一個?

205
00:09:31,626 --> 00:09:33,959
‪嘿,想當特務的人是你

206
00:09:33,959 --> 00:09:35,001
‪你說呢?

207
00:09:35,918 --> 00:09:38,084
‪-那個大鬍子?
‪-賓果

208
00:09:38,084 --> 00:09:39,876
‪天啊,我辦到了!

209
00:09:40,543 --> 00:09:41,376
‪等等

210
00:09:41,876 --> 00:09:44,126
‪我為什麼突然呼吸這麼急促?

211
00:09:44,126 --> 00:09:45,168
‪這正常嗎?

212
00:09:45,168 --> 00:09:48,334
‪不正常,你最好去給人檢查一下

213
00:09:51,209 --> 00:09:53,126
‪哇靠

214
00:09:53,126 --> 00:09:56,168
‪老天終於對巴比雷仁慈一回了

215
00:09:56,168 --> 00:09:59,043
‪這是在開什麼玩笑?

216
00:09:59,043 --> 00:10:01,584
‪-什麼?
‪-我們的TCB聯絡人

217
00:10:01,584 --> 00:10:02,543
‪妳說她喔?

218
00:10:02,543 --> 00:10:05,668
‪對啦,難怪指揮官不說聯絡人是誰

219
00:10:05,668 --> 00:10:07,126
‪-有問題嗎?
‪-有一些

220
00:10:07,126 --> 00:10:09,251
‪首先,她是我媽

221
00:10:10,501 --> 00:10:12,376
‪等等,真的嗎?

222
00:10:12,376 --> 00:10:14,334
‪是的,一切問題的源頭

223
00:10:14,334 --> 00:10:16,626
‪我對她有心理障礙

224
00:10:19,334 --> 00:10:20,709
‪西西

225
00:10:20,709 --> 00:10:21,793
‪媽

226
00:10:21,793 --> 00:10:23,251
‪妳看起來真棒

227
00:10:24,001 --> 00:10:25,834
‪罕見的正向獎勵

228
00:10:25,834 --> 00:10:27,876
‪不過瀏海是個有趣的選擇

229
00:10:27,876 --> 00:10:29,418
‪又回到老樣子

230
00:10:29,418 --> 00:10:31,168
‪多久沒見了?一年?

231
00:10:31,168 --> 00:10:32,209
‪更像是四年

232
00:10:32,209 --> 00:10:34,918
‪妳真是太無理取鬧了

233
00:10:35,709 --> 00:10:40,126
‪要不要介紹一下這位
‪高大、黝黑的性感帥哥?

234
00:10:40,126 --> 00:10:41,793
‪天啊

235
00:10:41,793 --> 00:10:43,251
‪-妳沒事吧?
‪-沒事

236
00:10:43,251 --> 00:10:45,251
‪只是忍不住想嘔吐

237
00:10:45,251 --> 00:10:47,293
‪嗨,我是貓王

238
00:10:47,293 --> 00:10:48,918
‪我是洛珊萊德探員

239
00:10:48,918 --> 00:10:52,334
‪人稱西西的媽媽
‪我會帶你們去荒郊野外

240
00:10:52,334 --> 00:10:53,751
‪原來是西西的媽媽

241
00:10:53,751 --> 00:10:57,001
‪我還以為是妹妹呢,但我相信妳說的

242
00:10:57,001 --> 00:11:00,876
‪眼睛湛藍又有魅力?

243
00:11:00,876 --> 00:11:03,209
‪越來越讓人欲罷不能了

244
00:11:03,209 --> 00:11:05,251
‪可以不要嗎?就這次

245
00:11:05,251 --> 00:11:08,876
‪其實我自願跟你搭檔,而不是跟西西

246
00:11:08,876 --> 00:11:09,959
‪我受寵若驚

247
00:11:09,959 --> 00:11:12,959
‪對,太好勝的媽媽都會對

248
00:11:12,959 --> 00:11:15,293
‪-不想要的女兒這麼做
‪-別理她

249
00:11:15,293 --> 00:11:18,168
‪那句話概括了我的童年

250
00:11:19,501 --> 00:11:20,501
‪仔細聽好

251
00:11:22,043 --> 00:11:24,668
‪我要你悄悄把紙條交給我們的聯絡人

252
00:11:25,334 --> 00:11:27,834
‪這是你展示間諜技巧的機會

253
00:11:27,834 --> 00:11:29,376
‪我不會讓你失望的,長官

254
00:11:29,376 --> 00:11:30,918
‪凡事都有第一次

255
00:11:30,918 --> 00:11:31,876
‪交給我來辦

256
00:11:37,334 --> 00:11:39,084
‪有什麼能幫忙的嗎?

257
00:11:40,334 --> 00:11:41,293
‪搞什麼?

258
00:11:41,959 --> 00:11:43,543
‪你是癲癇發作了嗎?

259
00:11:43,543 --> 00:11:45,376
‪看紙條就對了

260
00:11:47,209 --> 00:11:52,251
‪“親愛的混蛋,‘永遠忠誠’
‪在拉丁文是‘人渣’的意思嗎?”

261
00:11:53,834 --> 00:11:54,668
‪等等,什麼?

262
00:12:14,834 --> 00:12:17,418
‪幹得好,多爾,站起來,士兵

263
00:12:24,168 --> 00:12:27,668
‪TCB算是家族事業嗎?

264
00:12:27,668 --> 00:12:29,459
‪我們絕對不是一家人

265
00:12:29,459 --> 00:12:31,043
‪不是傳統的家庭

266
00:12:31,043 --> 00:12:32,501
‪也不是健康的家庭

267
00:12:32,501 --> 00:12:37,418
‪但沒錯,我大學一畢業就加入TCB
‪幾年後有了西西

268
00:12:37,418 --> 00:12:40,293
‪那是在放蕩匿名性行為之後

269
00:12:40,293 --> 00:12:42,293
‪不是匿名的

270
00:12:42,293 --> 00:12:44,543
‪若妳不知道我爸是誰就是

271
00:12:44,543 --> 00:12:47,168
‪那不代表他沒有名字,布奇熊

272
00:12:48,709 --> 00:12:49,834
‪“布奇熊”?

273
00:12:49,834 --> 00:12:52,043
‪她小時候我叫她的暱稱

274
00:12:52,043 --> 00:12:53,084
‪才不是

275
00:12:53,084 --> 00:12:56,251
‪妳從來沒有叫我可愛的暱稱
‪別再假裝正常了

276
00:12:56,251 --> 00:12:57,793
‪妳年紀太小,不記得了

277
00:12:57,793 --> 00:12:58,751
‪妳說得對

278
00:12:58,751 --> 00:13:02,418
‪我倒是記得妳叫我“體外射精警惕”

279
00:13:02,418 --> 00:13:07,834
‪我們跟那個誰吃晚餐時
‪我跟妳道歉了

280
00:13:07,834 --> 00:13:09,751
‪-克雷格
‪-克雷格是誰?

281
00:13:09,751 --> 00:13:12,209
‪前男友,我有一次帶他回家吃晚餐

282
00:13:12,209 --> 00:13:15,168
‪我記得媽帶了她有趣的對象

283
00:13:15,168 --> 00:13:16,751
‪重度酗酒

284
00:13:17,334 --> 00:13:18,918
‪-安靜
‪-妳才要安靜

285
00:13:19,709 --> 00:13:22,209
‪廣播地點在空地的另一邊

286
00:13:22,209 --> 00:13:24,043
‪很好,謝謝,妳可以走了

287
00:13:24,043 --> 00:13:26,959
‪聽著,我懂,妳不想看到我

288
00:13:26,959 --> 00:13:31,001
‪我是爛媽媽,妳想逼我割腕嗎?

289
00:13:31,001 --> 00:13:32,501
‪沒有

290
00:13:32,501 --> 00:13:34,918
‪但一點皮肉傷也許很不錯

291
00:13:37,709 --> 00:13:38,793
‪大家蹲低

292
00:13:38,793 --> 00:13:42,543
‪慢慢來,好好欣賞風景

293
00:13:43,043 --> 00:13:43,959
‪能不能別鬧了?

294
00:13:43,959 --> 00:13:46,501
‪什麼?他的屁股像法國小鮮肉一樣

295
00:13:46,501 --> 00:13:50,043
‪我不想破壞妳的興致,但我已婚了

296
00:13:50,043 --> 00:13:54,334
‪好吧,相信我,這不代表她...靠

297
00:13:57,168 --> 00:13:59,334
‪也許妳最好蹲下來,布奇熊

298
00:14:03,418 --> 00:14:06,209
‪-我不確定我適合這份工作
‪-你在開玩笑嗎?

299
00:14:06,209 --> 00:14:08,001
‪-你做得很好
‪-真的嗎?

300
00:14:08,001 --> 00:14:10,459
‪天啊,才不是!你是白痴嗎?

301
00:14:10,459 --> 00:14:11,376
‪抱歉

302
00:14:11,376 --> 00:14:12,626
‪嘿,看著我

303
00:14:12,626 --> 00:14:15,126
‪當外勤特務的第一條規則?
‪永遠不要道歉

304
00:14:15,126 --> 00:14:16,043
‪好

305
00:14:16,043 --> 00:14:19,251
‪第二條規則
‪看到對街穿白西裝的人了嗎?

306
00:14:21,668 --> 00:14:23,793
‪對,就是他,我要你殺了他

307
00:14:23,793 --> 00:14:25,084
‪現在去

308
00:14:25,084 --> 00:14:26,584
‪什麼?現在?

309
00:14:26,584 --> 00:14:28,918
‪也許先穿上衣服

310
00:14:29,501 --> 00:14:31,751
‪我不會,但多數人都會

311
00:14:37,459 --> 00:14:41,043
‪請告訴我巴比雷聽到了
‪正在呼叫空中支援

312
00:14:44,459 --> 00:14:47,084
‪你知道嗎?
‪我吃不出凝固汽油彈的味道

313
00:14:55,501 --> 00:15:00,293
‪好吧,說這裡爛透了的人也許有道理

314
00:15:08,626 --> 00:15:10,668
‪那些傢伙是什麼人?

315
00:15:10,668 --> 00:15:14,418
‪不知道,但他們絕對不是當地人

316
00:15:15,459 --> 00:15:17,834
‪妳們兩個在這裡等,我馬上回來

317
00:15:17,834 --> 00:15:20,084
‪-掩護我
‪-好的

318
00:15:27,751 --> 00:15:31,001
‪來吃晚餐的男朋友怎麼了?克雷格?

319
00:15:31,001 --> 00:15:32,918
‪妳跟他在廁所打砲

320
00:15:53,751 --> 00:15:57,751
‪這就是我們這行所謂的“大功告成”

321
00:15:57,751 --> 00:15:58,959
‪哪一行?

322
00:15:58,959 --> 00:16:02,209
‪這麼說很酷,別想太多

323
00:16:02,793 --> 00:16:04,751
‪這需要慶祝一番

324
00:16:04,751 --> 00:16:06,209
‪誰想喝幾杯?

325
00:16:06,209 --> 00:16:08,543
‪也許做出一些錯誤的決定

326
00:16:08,543 --> 00:16:12,043
‪天啊,媽,妳把情慾抹在他衣服上

327
00:16:13,918 --> 00:16:15,709
‪-搞什麼?
‪-遮住耳朵!

328
00:16:30,709 --> 00:16:32,584
‪天啊,你看到了嗎?

329
00:16:32,584 --> 00:16:33,834
‪把人變得野蠻

330
00:16:34,709 --> 00:16:36,293
‪我們必須去找她

331
00:16:37,084 --> 00:16:38,293
‪有必要嗎?

332
00:16:39,793 --> 00:16:40,626
‪可惡

333
00:16:42,126 --> 00:16:44,209
‪越共隧道系統

334
00:16:44,709 --> 00:16:45,709
‪跟緊了

335
00:16:55,918 --> 00:16:57,793
‪看到了嗎?我就說她很爛

336
00:16:57,793 --> 00:16:59,584
‪她被那個裝置影響了

337
00:16:59,584 --> 00:17:02,751
‪對,但最大的收穫是她還是很爛

338
00:17:06,876 --> 00:17:09,168
‪好吧,好人隊長,讓我來

339
00:17:16,501 --> 00:17:17,334
‪什麼...

340
00:17:18,001 --> 00:17:19,459
‪發生什麼事?

341
00:17:23,751 --> 00:17:25,918
‪別動

342
00:17:25,918 --> 00:17:26,876
‪他說得對

343
00:17:28,501 --> 00:17:30,543
‪至少等我們走了再動,走吧

344
00:17:30,543 --> 00:17:31,668
‪等等,什麼?

345
00:17:31,668 --> 00:17:35,501
‪等等,我們不會把妳母親留在這裡
‪她站在地雷上

346
00:17:35,501 --> 00:17:37,209
‪聽這位性感朋友的話

347
00:17:37,209 --> 00:17:38,959
‪任務優先,媽

348
00:17:38,959 --> 00:17:40,501
‪-是妳教我的
‪-我有嗎?

349
00:17:40,501 --> 00:17:43,251
‪當然沒有!妳什麼都沒教我

350
00:17:43,251 --> 00:17:46,251
‪只教我狂抽寶馬香菸
‪和在廁所做伏特加

351
00:17:46,251 --> 00:17:47,209
‪天啊

352
00:17:47,209 --> 00:17:49,668
‪但妳不能把我留在這裡,西西

353
00:17:49,668 --> 00:17:52,251
‪是嗎?給我一個好理由

354
00:17:52,251 --> 00:17:54,668
‪因為這樣妳永遠不會知道妳父親是誰

355
00:17:55,459 --> 00:17:57,251
‪-等等,妳知道?
‪-對

356
00:17:57,251 --> 00:17:59,334
‪妳幹嘛不告訴我?

357
00:17:59,334 --> 00:18:01,709
‪我不知道,妳要我說什麼?

358
00:18:01,709 --> 00:18:03,793
‪我對當好媽媽一無所知?

359
00:18:03,793 --> 00:18:05,543
‪廢話,看看我

360
00:18:05,543 --> 00:18:08,001
‪我試著在各方面打敗我女兒

361
00:18:08,001 --> 00:18:10,001
‪這麼做根本沒有原因

362
00:18:10,001 --> 00:18:14,001
‪是不是因為我讓妳想起
‪年華老去、人皆有一死?

363
00:18:15,168 --> 00:18:17,293
‪我已經站在地雷上了,好嗎?

364
00:18:17,293 --> 00:18:19,751
‪我已經夠慘了,不需要落井下石

365
00:18:23,959 --> 00:18:25,126
‪小心

366
00:18:28,918 --> 00:18:30,084
‪謝謝妳

367
00:18:30,084 --> 00:18:32,584
‪噁心,別謝我,快說我爸是誰

368
00:18:32,584 --> 00:18:35,959
‪那個啊,不,我不知道

369
00:18:35,959 --> 00:18:38,376
‪妳他媽的騙我

370
00:18:38,376 --> 00:18:41,584
‪我從妳包尿布開始就在騙妳,所以...

371
00:18:42,626 --> 00:18:44,334
‪現在停下來感覺有點奇怪

372
00:18:56,751 --> 00:18:58,251
‪長官,我覺得我辦不到

373
00:18:58,251 --> 00:19:00,668
‪那個人是美國大使館裡的間諜

374
00:19:00,668 --> 00:19:02,834
‪-現在你的任務是除掉他
‪-怎麼除掉?

375
00:19:02,834 --> 00:19:04,543
‪用我給你的武器

376
00:19:04,543 --> 00:19:05,543
‪武器?

377
00:19:06,209 --> 00:19:09,709
‪這是沙拉叉子,很陽春的那種

378
00:19:09,709 --> 00:19:10,751
‪看著我

379
00:19:10,751 --> 00:19:15,043
‪我要你回想起那些說你沒用的人

380
00:19:15,043 --> 00:19:17,501
‪-可悲的失敗者
‪-我不確定這有幫助

381
00:19:17,501 --> 00:19:21,334
‪無性關係、只有單顆睪丸的宅男
‪註定要悽慘落魄

382
00:19:21,334 --> 00:19:25,251
‪接著你利用那股憤怒
‪讓他們知道他們錯了

383
00:19:33,918 --> 00:19:34,918
‪安全詞

384
00:19:42,543 --> 00:19:43,459
‪貓王

385
00:19:43,459 --> 00:19:45,043
‪天啊,老大,你還好嗎?

386
00:19:45,043 --> 00:19:47,251
‪不太好,兄弟

387
00:20:03,084 --> 00:20:05,168
‪我跟你說,這是本世紀的獨家新聞

388
00:20:05,168 --> 00:20:07,543
‪不過文件的名字很蠢

389
00:20:07,543 --> 00:20:10,751
‪就叫五角大廈文件好了

390
00:20:10,751 --> 00:20:13,168
‪聽起來有個性,我喜歡

391
00:20:13,168 --> 00:20:15,584
‪我愛你們,保重

392
00:20:44,501 --> 00:20:46,376
‪你和你的脫衣舞秀

393
00:20:49,043 --> 00:20:52,501
‪聲波武器在後台,來人啊,快去摧毀

394
00:21:28,709 --> 00:21:32,918
‪各位,只有我這麼想
‪還是我媽還在下面很好笑?

395
00:21:34,293 --> 00:21:36,543
‪好吧,只有我這麼想,瞭解

396
00:21:38,293 --> 00:21:42,793
{\an8}‪(美國青商會年度最佳青年獎
‪1971年1月16日)

397
00:21:42,793 --> 00:21:44,168
‪你在這裡幹嘛?

398
00:21:44,168 --> 00:21:45,543
‪你以為我錯過這幕?

399
00:21:45,543 --> 00:21:48,168
‪我可是確保你贏得這蠢獎項的人呢

400
00:21:48,168 --> 00:21:50,084
‪什麼?這是什麼?

401
00:21:50,084 --> 00:21:53,376
‪我冒昧地準備了幾句話修飾你的講稿

402
00:21:53,376 --> 00:21:55,001
‪一些和戰爭有關的話

403
00:21:55,001 --> 00:21:57,126
‪我跟你說過我不喜歡那樣

404
00:21:57,126 --> 00:21:59,376
‪對,我知道你說過,但相信我

405
00:21:59,376 --> 00:22:02,334
‪-我們上次不是討論過了?
‪-討論過什麼?

406
00:22:02,334 --> 00:22:04,918
‪我不會聽從你的命令

407
00:22:14,918 --> 00:22:17,668
‪(中止任務...)

408
00:22:17,668 --> 00:22:19,293
‪(新計劃)

409
00:22:19,293 --> 00:22:22,959
‪(“阿羅哈行動”)

410
00:23:18,043 --> 00:23:20,834
‪字幕翻譯:張瀛