1
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{\an8}‪(1956年 路易斯安那州 费里迪)

2
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‪(胜利唱片)

3
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‪(埃尔维斯)

4
00:00:40,126 --> 00:00:41,334
‪-加百列!
‪-父亲!

5
00:00:41,876 --> 00:00:45,084
‪你今晚不是要上电视讲道吗?

6
00:00:45,084 --> 00:00:46,626
‪没错 我去了

7
00:00:46,626 --> 00:00:51,668
‪我讲了耶稣在旷野里
‪与魔鬼对抗的典故

8
00:00:51,668 --> 00:00:53,959
‪最后耶稣赢了!

9
00:00:53,959 --> 00:00:55,251
‪多亏了空手道

10
00:00:55,251 --> 00:00:56,668
‪等等 是真的吗?

11
00:00:56,668 --> 00:01:00,376
‪只是我没想到回到家后

12
00:01:00,376 --> 00:01:05,668
‪会听到家里竟然播放着撒旦的音乐!

13
00:01:05,668 --> 00:01:08,126
‪这是...我发誓以后再也不敢了!

14
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{\an8}‪小子 这种事以后再也不会发生了

15
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‪我把这个魔鬼的唱片都放进...

16
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‪神圣的火...糟糕!

17
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‪父亲!

18
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‪该死的聚酯纤维!

19
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‪父亲!

20
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‪埃尔维斯!

21
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‪你把我父亲给“烧淹”死了!

22
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‪瞧我跟你说的

23
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{\an8}‪挺不错的嘛

24
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{\an8}‪我答应过要多花时间陪你的
‪就从这一刻开始吧

25
00:02:12,043 --> 00:02:13,959
‪这句话我好像听过了

26
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‪相信我嘛

27
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‪打扰一下

28
00:02:17,709 --> 00:02:19,459
‪知道打扰还是不想停下来 对吧?

29
00:02:19,459 --> 00:02:20,584
‪我只是想打声招呼

30
00:02:20,584 --> 00:02:22,668
‪那你已经做到了 好样的

31
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‪对了 我叫加百列·沃夫

32
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‪野狼世界通讯社的总裁

33
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‪非常期待你的演唱会

34
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‪第一次通过卫星向全球广播

35
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‪不令人期待才怪

36
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‪我们也参与了
‪这场演出的广播权招标项目

37
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‪可惜输给了NBC电视台
‪凡事都有赢有输 对吧?

38
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‪加百列 按照我的人生经历

39
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‪其实“人生胜利组”是存在的

40
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‪失陪了

41
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‪好的

42
00:02:47,209 --> 00:02:48,459
‪祝你明天演出顺利

43
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‪你肯定猜不到我刚刚撞见了谁

44
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{\an8}‪放心吧 我连猜也不想猜

45
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‪是《檀岛警骑》的男主角杰克·劳德

46
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‪我到现在才知道
‪他讨厌在厕所里被人拥抱

47
00:03:01,793 --> 00:03:04,418
‪他目前在城里拍剧
‪你也知道我是他的铁粉了

48
00:03:04,418 --> 00:03:06,418
‪看来杰克如今也知道你是他的粉丝了

49
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‪提到粉丝
‪聚在那边的猫王粉丝越来越多了

50
00:03:11,459 --> 00:03:12,626
‪介意我过去打招呼吗?

51
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‪我都习惯了

52
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‪我去去就回来

53
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‪好的

54
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‪好的 这位女士

55
00:03:20,126 --> 00:03:21,334
‪(支持猫王竞选总统)

56
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‪十分感谢你们的支持

57
00:03:25,459 --> 00:03:26,584
‪你来干吗?

58
00:03:26,584 --> 00:03:30,668
‪我还以为这是跟唐霍要签名的队伍

59
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‪看来我要失望了

60
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‪过来

61
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‪如果你来是为了叫我回去
‪那你就放弃吧

62
00:03:37,876 --> 00:03:41,876
‪还真以为自己是天下第一 挺好的

63
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‪我是认真的

64
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‪提醒你 这个世界不是围着你打转的

65
00:03:46,293 --> 00:03:47,834
‪(夏威夷欢迎你
‪可以为你生个孩子吗?)

66
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‪要打赌吗?

67
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‪普雷斯特太太
‪你和埃尔维斯玩得开心吗?

68
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‪贝蒂 帮我个忙

69
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‪等他忙完后

70
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‪麻烦你转告他
‪我已经搭飞机回去孟菲斯了

71
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‪我不管

72
00:04:00,126 --> 00:04:01,501
‪随你怎么想

73
00:04:01,501 --> 00:04:03,876
‪总之你们离我远点

74
00:04:03,876 --> 00:04:04,834
‪好吧

75
00:04:05,751 --> 00:04:06,959
‪问个问题...

76
00:04:06,959 --> 00:04:09,751
‪别问我 我不知道唐霍住在哪里

77
00:04:09,751 --> 00:04:12,543
‪片名:特务猫王

78
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‪所谓“外表不能代表一切” 紧接下来

79
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{\an8}‪最新《007》电影的主演之一
‪赫夫·维勒查泽

80
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{\an8}‪今天来到了直播室接受我们的专访

81
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{\an8}‪我在室内抽烟呢

82
00:04:29,959 --> 00:04:31,293
{\an8}‪这是什么情况?

83
00:04:31,293 --> 00:04:33,876
{\an8}‪两天前我叫它到酒店大厅要些薯片后

84
00:04:33,876 --> 00:04:36,084
{\an8}‪它就失踪到现在才出现

85
00:04:36,626 --> 00:04:38,376
‪看来它忘记去要薯片了

86
00:04:38,376 --> 00:04:39,584
‪重点是它还活着吗?

87
00:04:39,584 --> 00:04:40,501
{\an8}‪不清楚

88
00:04:41,001 --> 00:04:42,334
{\an8}‪你有没有看到普瑞希拉?

89
00:04:42,334 --> 00:04:45,084
‪说到普瑞希拉 你听我说

90
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{\an8}‪别去 想也别想 真他妈的!

91
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‪(猫王 夏威夷欢迎你)

92
00:05:00,834 --> 00:05:01,709
{\an8}‪怎么?

93
00:05:01,709 --> 00:05:04,501
{\an8}‪看你表情我就知道你在想象追车戏码

94
00:05:04,501 --> 00:05:08,293
{\an8}‪你已经放下秘密特工的身份了
‪你忘了吗?

95
00:05:09,209 --> 00:05:10,709
{\an8}‪你刚刚说普瑞希拉怎么来着?

96
00:05:10,709 --> 00:05:13,126
{\an8}‪-她搭飞机回去孟菲斯了
‪-真的吗?

97
00:05:13,126 --> 00:05:17,084
{\an8}‪那边出了事
‪你一会儿还是给她打个电话吧

98
00:05:17,084 --> 00:05:19,709
{\an8}‪但现在你要准备一下了

99
00:05:19,709 --> 00:05:22,251
{\an8}‪鲍比·雷马上就来接你

100
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{\an8}‪他去了哪里?

101
00:05:23,251 --> 00:05:24,959
{\an8}‪-他去接了那个孩子
‪-哪个孩子?

102
00:05:24,959 --> 00:05:26,334
{\an8}‪“那个孩子”

103
00:05:26,334 --> 00:05:30,918
{\an8}‪天气晴朗 开敞篷车出门
‪让秀发随风飞扬 感觉很棒吧?

104
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{\an8}‪我就知道你会喜欢的

105
00:05:33,876 --> 00:05:36,459
{\an8}‪那件事发生后
‪这是我起码能为你做的事

106
00:05:36,459 --> 00:05:38,501
{\an8}‪等等 开拍了吗 ?

107
00:05:38,501 --> 00:05:40,418
{\an8}‪等一下 那是我的啤酒吗?

108
00:05:44,209 --> 00:05:45,668
{\an8}‪跟你说件事

109
00:05:45,668 --> 00:05:48,918
{\an8}‪你给了我很大的鼓励

110
00:05:48,918 --> 00:05:50,251
{\an8}‪你是活生生的见证

111
00:05:50,251 --> 00:05:54,293
{\an8}‪就算气管断裂 肺部损坏
‪脾脏功能尽失 只剩半个肾脏

112
00:05:54,293 --> 00:05:56,668
{\an8}‪人生还是存有一线光明

113
00:05:57,334 --> 00:06:00,793
{\an8}‪我不懂“一线光明”是什么意思
‪但起码你可以亲自会一会猫王

114
00:06:00,793 --> 00:06:02,793
{\an8}‪可能只有区区几秒钟
‪不能打包票答应你

115
00:06:02,793 --> 00:06:03,793
{\an8}‪喝不喝啤酒?

116
00:06:03,793 --> 00:06:06,084
{\an8}‪测试音响后 就马上回酒店

117
00:06:06,084 --> 00:06:08,251
{\an8}‪我是指直接回酒店

118
00:06:08,251 --> 00:06:10,126
{\an8}‪总觉得你话中带话

119
00:06:10,126 --> 00:06:12,751
{\an8}‪我昨晚看到你跟那个女人说话

120
00:06:12,751 --> 00:06:14,626
{\an8}‪那个比基尼美女

121
00:06:14,626 --> 00:06:16,584
{\an8}‪好吧 这么问你可能很不妥 可是...

122
00:06:16,584 --> 00:06:18,668
{\an8}‪你得说得更具体点才行

123
00:06:19,251 --> 00:06:20,376
‪靠你了

124
00:06:20,376 --> 00:06:21,418
‪都靠你们了

125
00:06:21,418 --> 00:06:24,418
‪茜茜
‪以及《檀岛警骑》的杰克·劳德

126
00:06:24,418 --> 00:06:26,459
‪没人比你更熟悉这座岛

127
00:06:26,459 --> 00:06:28,543
‪还有性格演员赫夫·维勒查泽

128
00:06:28,543 --> 00:06:31,543
‪你惊奇的骨骼终于派上用场了

129
00:06:31,543 --> 00:06:35,084
‪赶紧去完成任务
‪否则就有数以百计的人丧命

130
00:06:35,084 --> 00:06:37,751
‪说得好像很容易似的 很好 谢了

131
00:06:37,751 --> 00:06:39,084
‪还有其他有趣的消息吗?

132
00:06:39,084 --> 00:06:41,918
‪还有一件事 我们追逐的这帮坏人

133
00:06:41,918 --> 00:06:43,584
‪我们终于查到他们的组织名称了

134
00:06:43,584 --> 00:06:46,376
‪抓到掌握这张蓝图的混账时

135
00:06:46,376 --> 00:06:47,751
‪他只说了一个字

136
00:06:47,751 --> 00:06:49,126
‪“坏”

137
00:06:49,126 --> 00:06:50,751
‪当时他就戴着这枚戒指

138
00:06:50,751 --> 00:06:52,793
‪我的妈啊 这是那家伙的手指吗?

139
00:06:52,793 --> 00:06:54,751
‪总之不是随便一个人的手指就对了

140
00:06:55,293 --> 00:06:57,209
‪换成别人的手指 这手指早就变形了

141
00:07:02,626 --> 00:07:04,459
‪嗨 布奇熊

142
00:07:04,459 --> 00:07:06,668
‪我们还不至于那么熟 你来干吗?

143
00:07:06,668 --> 00:07:09,501
‪怎么?我堂堂一个大美女
‪就不能来到夏威夷玩吗?

144
00:07:09,501 --> 00:07:11,793
‪是跟那个自以为是的人渣一起来吗?

145
00:07:11,793 --> 00:07:12,918
‪不行

146
00:07:13,959 --> 00:07:15,626
‪他是不是很棒呢?

147
00:07:15,626 --> 00:07:18,418
‪我们旧情复燃了

148
00:07:18,418 --> 00:07:20,168
‪不久前我们在越南重逢

149
00:07:20,168 --> 00:07:23,959
‪从那以后 他就对我倾倒不已

150
00:07:23,959 --> 00:07:27,043
‪-天啊 等一下
‪-简直就像童话般的爱情

151
00:07:27,043 --> 00:07:32,418
‪前提是童话里有大量伏特加汤力
‪以及口交戏码

152
00:07:33,084 --> 00:07:34,251
‪天啊

153
00:07:35,043 --> 00:07:36,209
‪你没事吧?

154
00:07:36,209 --> 00:07:38,501
‪别说了 你们旧情复燃?怎么说?

155
00:07:38,501 --> 00:07:41,668
‪我们很多年前有过短暂的恋情
‪那年你还没出生呢

156
00:07:41,668 --> 00:07:44,459
‪如果你打算告诉我
‪罗伯特·顾雷特是我亲爹

157
00:07:44,459 --> 00:07:46,459
‪我就一枪射死你们俩

158
00:07:46,459 --> 00:07:47,751
‪后面还会再补几枪!

159
00:07:47,751 --> 00:07:50,501
‪别激动 怎么可能?

160
00:07:50,501 --> 00:07:51,459
‪起码我认为不是

161
00:07:54,834 --> 00:07:58,543
‪该死的!

162
00:07:59,209 --> 00:08:00,459
‪该死的!

163
00:08:00,459 --> 00:08:01,376
‪不理你们了

164
00:08:01,376 --> 00:08:04,459
‪不说你不知道
‪杰克·劳德可以说是岛主了

165
00:08:04,459 --> 00:08:07,001
‪他就住在岛上
‪我可以带你去看看他的私宅

166
00:08:07,001 --> 00:08:10,793
‪但只能从车上看
‪侵权警告函上写得很清楚了

167
00:08:16,584 --> 00:08:18,126
‪是茜茜 “茜草”的“茜”!

168
00:08:18,709 --> 00:08:20,209
‪不要!

169
00:08:21,959 --> 00:08:23,918
‪我的妈啊!

170
00:08:23,918 --> 00:08:26,084
‪小心 赫夫 看车!

171
00:08:28,251 --> 00:08:29,376
‪说人话 快说

172
00:08:30,751 --> 00:08:32,459
‪什么?两个都没了?

173
00:08:34,043 --> 00:08:35,084
‪(夏威夷欢迎你)

174
00:08:35,084 --> 00:08:38,501
‪我就尝尝“阿罗哈卷饼”吧

175
00:08:38,501 --> 00:08:40,376
‪以后送你一辆凯迪拉克跑车 老板

176
00:08:40,376 --> 00:08:42,043
‪好啊

177
00:08:42,043 --> 00:08:44,001
‪普雷斯利先生 您还有什么需要吗?

178
00:08:44,001 --> 00:08:46,668
‪再来一大份“人中之渣”

179
00:08:46,668 --> 00:08:50,168
‪等一下 算了 原来我身边就有一个

180
00:08:50,834 --> 00:08:51,668
‪滚远点

181
00:08:51,668 --> 00:08:54,751
‪见到老朋友
‪有必要劈头就说这种话吗?

182
00:08:54,751 --> 00:08:56,918
‪没必要 问题是你不是我的老朋友
‪滚远点

183
00:08:56,918 --> 00:08:59,501
‪我只是想来探望你一下
‪想看你最近过得好不好

184
00:08:59,501 --> 00:09:03,959
‪我即将为全球观众演出一场
‪毕生最盛大的演唱会

185
00:09:03,959 --> 00:09:06,501
‪-天啊
‪-没有你 我也过得很好

186
00:09:07,293 --> 00:09:09,626
‪看得出来 话说我是来向你求助的

187
00:09:09,626 --> 00:09:11,293
‪给我滚远点

188
00:09:11,293 --> 00:09:12,584
‪理解

189
00:09:12,584 --> 00:09:15,501
‪如果我告诉你
‪这事攸关你的演唱会呢?

190
00:09:16,001 --> 00:09:17,168
‪-解释清楚
‪-好的

191
00:09:17,834 --> 00:09:20,459
‪记得我们先前追踪的声波武器吗?

192
00:09:20,459 --> 00:09:23,251
‪我们追踪了武器撒发出来的微粒子
‪结果发现源自...

193
00:09:23,251 --> 00:09:24,584
‪解释快点

194
00:09:24,584 --> 00:09:25,584
‪...外太空

195
00:09:25,584 --> 00:09:27,001
‪怎么说?

196
00:09:27,001 --> 00:09:29,084
‪瞧谁突然感兴趣起来了

197
00:09:29,084 --> 00:09:30,876
‪很好 是这样的

198
00:09:30,876 --> 00:09:33,459
‪武器就安装在即将广播
‪你这场全球演唱会的卫星上

199
00:09:33,459 --> 00:09:35,334
‪到时有数以百万计的猫王粉会观赏...

200
00:09:35,334 --> 00:09:36,709
‪应该是“数以亿万计”才对

201
00:09:37,709 --> 00:09:39,043
‪没差多少

202
00:09:39,043 --> 00:09:43,293
‪你的演出和音乐
‪将让世界各地的人受到干扰

203
00:09:43,293 --> 00:09:47,251
‪导致他们变成嗜血的杀人狂
‪到时全球各地势必迎来一场浴血杀戮

204
00:09:47,251 --> 00:09:50,501
‪那你还他妈的坐在这里干吗?
‪快去处理啊!

205
00:09:50,501 --> 00:09:51,709
‪所以我才来向你求助

206
00:09:51,709 --> 00:09:52,834
‪你有的是手下

207
00:09:52,834 --> 00:09:54,584
‪我有的是手下?听好

208
00:09:54,584 --> 00:09:57,918
‪你两个脑残的朋友在停车场
‪把我两个手下撞倒了

209
00:09:57,918 --> 00:09:59,668
‪该死的鲍比·雷

210
00:09:59,668 --> 00:10:01,293
‪我能信任的人已经不多了

211
00:10:01,293 --> 00:10:02,584
‪怎么说?

212
00:10:02,584 --> 00:10:05,126
‪TCB有个内鬼 这个人内外勾结

213
00:10:05,126 --> 00:10:07,668
‪-什么?
‪-造成声波武器被盗

214
00:10:07,668 --> 00:10:09,418
‪肯定是内鬼干的

215
00:10:14,001 --> 00:10:15,043
‪快了

216
00:10:15,584 --> 00:10:16,918
‪我的大结局就快来了

217
00:10:16,918 --> 00:10:20,084
‪今晚以后 埃尔维斯·普雷斯利
‪将失去所有人的爱戴

218
00:10:20,084 --> 00:10:21,543
‪成为众人唾骂的过街老鼠

219
00:10:22,209 --> 00:10:25,001
‪你问我为什么不让你
‪在青年商会颁奖礼上干掉他

220
00:10:25,001 --> 00:10:26,209
‪今天就让你知道为什么

221
00:10:27,918 --> 00:10:29,501
‪今天埃尔维斯将成为历史上

222
00:10:29,501 --> 00:10:32,043
‪用音乐害死数以百万计无辜者的人

223
00:10:32,043 --> 00:10:34,959
‪从今以后 全世界都会跟我一样
‪对埃尔维斯恨之入骨

224
00:10:34,959 --> 00:10:36,793
‪正如《圣经》的记载

225
00:10:36,793 --> 00:10:40,084
‪“那个披着谜样披风
‪发出鬼魅歌声的男子

226
00:10:40,084 --> 00:10:42,501
‪终于屈服了”

227
00:10:42,501 --> 00:10:45,084
‪我敢肯定
‪这是利未记第4章12节的记载

228
00:10:46,543 --> 00:10:48,001
‪差不多吧

229
00:10:49,834 --> 00:10:51,209
‪我来理清整件事的脉络

230
00:10:51,751 --> 00:10:53,751
‪当年我被征召入伍是你的安排

231
00:10:53,751 --> 00:10:56,626
‪目的是汲取我的基因
‪来打造一部能操控人心的仪器

232
00:10:56,626 --> 00:10:57,959
‪那部仪器给你弄丢了

233
00:10:57,959 --> 00:11:01,459
‪辗转被安装在一个卫星上
‪眼看全世界即将迎来末日

234
00:11:01,459 --> 00:11:03,584
‪所以你跑来向我求助?

235
00:11:04,293 --> 00:11:07,543
‪你说得略嫌冗长
‪但事情差不多是这样

236
00:11:07,543 --> 00:11:11,168
‪你知道你在要求我拯救
‪即将被我自己毁灭的世界 对吧?

237
00:11:11,168 --> 00:11:14,084
‪没错 如果这场演唱会没成功
‪敌人就会放眼下一场演唱会

238
00:11:14,084 --> 00:11:16,293
‪真他妈的 听好

239
00:11:16,293 --> 00:11:18,793
‪认识你以后
‪我的人生就变得颠沛流离

240
00:11:19,751 --> 00:11:23,001
‪得了吧
‪你私下都在扮演无名英雄的角色

241
00:11:23,001 --> 00:11:24,293
‪太可悲了

242
00:11:24,293 --> 00:11:26,209
‪是我把你带往世界各地的

243
00:11:26,209 --> 00:11:29,543
‪你搞错了你只是把我推入深渊
‪底下都是你的臭屎

244
00:11:29,543 --> 00:11:32,209
‪是啊 后来你对我开了两枪后
‪决定辞职不干

245
00:11:32,209 --> 00:11:33,459
‪亏我为你牺牲了这么多

246
00:11:33,459 --> 00:11:35,459
‪你说我有什么感受?

247
00:11:35,459 --> 00:11:36,501
‪你会放下的

248
00:11:36,501 --> 00:11:40,376
‪-我感觉自己的情绪被鸡奸了
‪-你怎么会有这种错觉?

249
00:11:40,376 --> 00:11:41,959
‪问编剧吧 我怎么知道?

250
00:11:41,959 --> 00:11:44,084
‪重点是 你到底帮不帮我?

251
00:11:44,084 --> 00:11:45,709
‪时间不多了

252
00:11:49,751 --> 00:11:51,251
‪好吧 我去

253
00:11:51,251 --> 00:11:53,251
‪但绝不是因为听你的

254
00:11:53,251 --> 00:11:56,626
‪我可不想让那群狗杂种
‪毁掉我的演唱会

255
00:11:56,626 --> 00:12:00,793
‪还有“猫王拯救世界”这句话挺顺耳的

256
00:12:01,459 --> 00:12:03,668
‪我还没把最好玩的部分告诉你呢

257
00:12:14,459 --> 00:12:16,959
‪你的心思也太容易被人看穿了
‪这样真的好吗?

258
00:12:17,543 --> 00:12:18,376
‪你说什么?

259
00:12:18,376 --> 00:12:20,584
‪我就知道你会为了喷气背包
‪而加入我们

260
00:12:20,584 --> 00:12:21,793
‪斯盖特怎么来了?

261
00:12:21,793 --> 00:12:24,168
‪还有我的薯片呢?

262
00:12:24,709 --> 00:12:27,584
‪不好意思 借你的朋友一用
‪我们需要它

263
00:12:27,584 --> 00:12:28,959
‪-为什么?
‪-为了那个东西

264
00:12:31,418 --> 00:12:33,751
‪那个太空舱
‪原本是按照赫夫的体型设计的

265
00:12:33,751 --> 00:12:36,876
‪目的是登陆卫星解除声波武器

266
00:12:36,876 --> 00:12:39,793
‪但有鉴于赫夫正在停车场流血不止

267
00:12:39,793 --> 00:12:41,959
‪我们只好退而求其次

268
00:12:42,543 --> 00:12:44,168
‪记得宇航局那群王八蛋吗?

269
00:12:44,168 --> 00:12:47,334
‪他们竟然用几个争议性的理由
‪将你逐出任务

270
00:12:47,334 --> 00:12:50,876
‪这就是你证明他们看走眼的机会
‪好好把握

271
00:12:53,793 --> 00:12:54,626
‪很好

272
00:12:55,418 --> 00:12:57,001
‪一定会成功的

273
00:13:06,709 --> 00:13:08,793
‪一路顺风 醉后大猩猩

274
00:13:08,793 --> 00:13:10,084
‪一路顺风

275
00:13:14,709 --> 00:13:16,251
‪贝蒂 你怎么...

276
00:13:20,043 --> 00:13:21,084
‪斯盖特还好吗?

277
00:13:21,084 --> 00:13:23,293
‪它没事 这是火箭的遥测控制台

278
00:13:23,293 --> 00:13:25,543
‪我们收到消息 岛上有座信号站

279
00:13:25,543 --> 00:13:28,459
‪正在对卫星发送秘密信号
‪如今得知信号站的位置了

280
00:13:29,751 --> 00:13:31,876
‪那我们还在等什么呢?

281
00:13:35,126 --> 00:13:38,501
‪埃尔维斯从拉斯维加斯带回了
‪你的电击枪

282
00:13:39,001 --> 00:13:39,834
‪他非常喜欢

283
00:13:41,459 --> 00:13:44,126
‪-我也越来越欲罢不能了
‪-等等 等一下

284
00:13:44,126 --> 00:13:45,793
‪等一下 好吧

285
00:13:45,793 --> 00:13:49,709
‪瞧我被你说得嗨起来了

286
00:13:49,709 --> 00:13:50,751
‪-闭嘴
‪-知道了

287
00:13:50,751 --> 00:13:53,209
‪我家埃尔维斯呢?

288
00:13:54,001 --> 00:13:55,709
‪去完成他的使命

289
00:13:55,709 --> 00:13:59,168
‪我不会再让你摧毁他的人生了

290
00:13:59,168 --> 00:14:00,459
‪摧毁他的人生?

291
00:14:01,001 --> 00:14:03,501
‪那个男人是在拯救世界啊

292
00:14:03,501 --> 00:14:06,584
‪你呢?
‪你只是想要他去测试音响 不会吧?

293
00:14:09,543 --> 00:14:12,793
‪他身上最好别多一条伤疤 不然...

294
00:14:12,793 --> 00:14:14,543
‪不然呢?

295
00:14:16,209 --> 00:14:20,626
‪听好 再不放下这玩意
‪迟早会闹出一两件大事来

296
00:14:25,001 --> 00:14:26,793
‪另一件大事是什么来着?

297
00:14:31,709 --> 00:14:35,293
‪看来目标是那个滑稽的“M”字符号

298
00:14:41,001 --> 00:14:42,334
‪(薯片)

299
00:14:55,126 --> 00:14:56,376
‪坏人都跑到哪儿去了?

300
00:14:57,959 --> 00:15:00,293
‪不问不就得了!

301
00:15:12,209 --> 00:15:13,168
‪该死的!

302
00:15:18,876 --> 00:15:21,001
‪欢乐的时刻总是很短暂

303
00:15:28,126 --> 00:15:31,751
‪说真的 真不知道是我枪术
‪还是出场更精彩

304
00:15:32,751 --> 00:15:33,668
‪谢了

305
00:15:33,668 --> 00:15:34,668
‪不客气

306
00:15:34,668 --> 00:15:36,459
‪怎么?竟然跑来救我?

307
00:15:37,418 --> 00:15:38,543
‪我不介意

308
00:15:38,543 --> 00:15:41,084
‪话说你还得赶去演出呢

309
00:15:41,084 --> 00:15:44,001
‪要摧毁整个接收器才能走吧

310
00:15:44,001 --> 00:15:47,293
‪你放心去演出吧
‪接收器交给我好了 相信我

311
00:15:48,626 --> 00:15:50,418
‪听好 我就是放心不下

312
00:15:52,459 --> 00:15:53,793
‪你干吗?

313
00:15:53,793 --> 00:15:57,001
‪忘记检查火箭筒的把手了吧?

314
00:15:57,001 --> 00:15:58,084
‪真他妈的

315
00:15:58,084 --> 00:16:00,376
‪他们把这个难看的“M”字符号
‪印在所有东西上

316
00:16:00,376 --> 00:16:02,751
‪搞得好像每件东西只能分时使用似的

317
00:16:02,751 --> 00:16:05,043
‪原来你就是那个内鬼

318
00:16:05,043 --> 00:16:07,209
‪“内鬼”这个说法不好听

319
00:16:07,209 --> 00:16:08,793
‪是内鬼没错 只是不好听

320
00:16:15,001 --> 00:16:17,501
‪自以为是的社会败类!

321
00:16:17,501 --> 00:16:18,626
‪纠正一下

322
00:16:18,626 --> 00:16:21,584
‪是有托尼奖加持的社会败类!

323
00:16:21,584 --> 00:16:23,251
‪两者差之千里!

324
00:16:26,293 --> 00:16:28,293
‪真够倒霉的

325
00:16:28,293 --> 00:16:30,584
‪得了吧 别气馁嘛

326
00:16:31,751 --> 00:16:33,709
‪好戏才刚开始呢

327
00:16:33,709 --> 00:16:35,001
‪这句话是对我说的

328
00:16:36,001 --> 00:16:40,251
‪记得你服役期间
‪指挥官对你进行的一连串实验吗?

329
00:16:41,293 --> 00:16:42,501
‪我也在场

330
00:16:44,168 --> 00:16:47,001
‪当时我是指挥官的得力助手

331
00:16:48,876 --> 00:16:52,834
‪我眼看着你转变成一头野兽
‪你当时就应该一命呜呼了

332
00:16:53,501 --> 00:16:56,209
‪-抱歉让你失望了
‪-结果你没死

333
00:16:56,793 --> 00:16:59,793
‪还昂首阔步地踏入TCB
‪当总部是你自己家

334
00:16:59,793 --> 00:17:05,334
‪还顶着一头精致的发型
‪一条清晰的下颔线

335
00:17:05,334 --> 00:17:08,043
‪以及一个令人蠢蠢欲动的桃心唇

336
00:17:08,876 --> 00:17:11,209
‪我开始感到你对我抱有私仇

337
00:17:12,001 --> 00:17:13,959
‪说得你好像还不满足似的

338
00:17:13,959 --> 00:17:16,168
‪你才华洋溢、一大堆粉丝

339
00:17:16,168 --> 00:17:17,834
‪以及海量金曲

340
00:17:17,834 --> 00:17:19,251
‪你拥有的还不够吗?

341
00:17:19,251 --> 00:17:23,126
‪就连TCB你也要从我身边夺走?

342
00:17:24,834 --> 00:17:26,418
‪所以你确实欣赏我的音乐

343
00:17:27,626 --> 00:17:30,251
‪我说了这么多
‪你就只注意到这点吗?

344
00:17:33,209 --> 00:17:35,209
‪你不是在跟我妈厮混吗?

345
00:17:38,501 --> 00:17:39,501
‪你没事吧?

346
00:17:40,084 --> 00:17:40,918
‪我没事

347
00:17:40,918 --> 00:17:43,584
‪-刚刚怎么回事?
‪-该死的顾雷特

348
00:17:43,584 --> 00:17:45,793
‪这就是你的遗言吗?有意思

349
00:17:45,793 --> 00:17:48,126
‪但起码你的遗言中有我的名字

350
00:17:56,459 --> 00:17:59,751
‪我是不是缺席了哪个会议?
‪为什么要救他?

351
00:17:59,751 --> 00:18:02,751
‪信不信由你 他可能是我的生父

352
00:18:03,793 --> 00:18:05,084
‪那又怎样?

353
00:18:22,709 --> 00:18:24,084
‪到底什么情况?

354
00:18:38,459 --> 00:18:41,209
‪(警告 氧气剩下6%)

355
00:18:42,543 --> 00:18:45,626
‪你说你这位超级好爸爸
‪介不介意借我这玩意?

356
00:18:45,626 --> 00:18:46,543
‪闭嘴

357
00:18:53,168 --> 00:18:55,293
‪不要!

358
00:18:55,876 --> 00:19:01,709
‪我对耶稣和祂七个侏儒门徒起誓
‪这一切还没结束呢

359
00:19:03,001 --> 00:19:04,376
‪该死的顾雷特

360
00:19:04,376 --> 00:19:06,251
‪不会吧?他就是内鬼?

361
00:19:06,251 --> 00:19:07,209
‪确实是他

362
00:19:07,209 --> 00:19:10,626
‪这么多年以来
‪我都到处跟人说这家伙是人渣

363
00:19:11,209 --> 00:19:14,168
‪总之大功告成了

364
00:19:14,168 --> 00:19:16,793
‪我们还没把斯盖特带回地球呢

365
00:19:16,793 --> 00:19:19,751
‪带回地球?你在...

366
00:19:19,751 --> 00:19:22,501
‪那是个一去不回的行程
‪它永远回不来了

367
00:19:22,501 --> 00:19:24,459
‪你胡扯什么?

368
00:19:24,459 --> 00:19:26,751
‪如果赫夫还活着 他也会说这句话

369
00:19:26,751 --> 00:19:28,293
‪重点是他也被蒙在鼓里

370
00:19:31,126 --> 00:19:33,584
‪-你要上哪儿去?
‪-去机场 真他妈的

371
00:19:35,501 --> 00:19:37,501
‪天啊 我好喜欢他生气时的气场

372
00:19:38,084 --> 00:19:40,793
‪我搞清楚一下
‪你为阿波罗号登月一事

373
00:19:40,793 --> 00:19:44,334
‪感到嫉妒不已 于是豪花百万美元

374
00:19:44,334 --> 00:19:47,501
‪将这架飞机改造成半桶水的太空梭?

375
00:19:48,376 --> 00:19:52,001
‪你把我说得有点小气

376
00:20:06,126 --> 00:20:07,876
‪你竟然把艾美奖座也带上飞机?

377
00:20:10,584 --> 00:20:13,043
‪这些都是薯片吗?

378
00:20:14,084 --> 00:20:15,751
‪那个狗娘养的小东西

379
00:20:16,334 --> 00:20:17,168
‪等一下

380
00:20:17,751 --> 00:20:18,668
‪搞什么?

381
00:20:31,751 --> 00:20:33,793
‪(警告 氧气剩下%)

382
00:20:40,918 --> 00:20:43,001
‪好恶心

383
00:20:43,001 --> 00:20:44,293
‪我去救他

384
00:20:45,251 --> 00:20:48,751
‪你竟然有
‪尼尔·阿姆斯特朗的航天服?

385
00:20:49,918 --> 00:20:51,543
‪是啊 没错

386
00:20:51,543 --> 00:20:52,543
‪等一下

387
00:20:52,543 --> 00:20:56,709
‪你们两个傻逼竟然想过
‪要开着这架飞机飞往月球?

388
00:20:59,251 --> 00:21:00,334
‪快醒醒 真他妈的

389
00:21:00,334 --> 00:21:03,126
‪你应该给它做人工呼吸才对吧

390
00:21:03,126 --> 00:21:05,376
‪虽然它显然是染上了性病

391
00:21:13,626 --> 00:21:15,584
‪怎么变得更大了?

392
00:21:15,584 --> 00:21:17,209
‪天啊 可以回地球了吗?

393
00:21:17,209 --> 00:21:19,709
‪说到回地球这事

394
00:21:19,709 --> 00:21:20,959
‪可惜我们回不去了

395
00:21:20,959 --> 00:21:22,376
‪怎么说?

396
00:21:22,376 --> 00:21:24,376
‪隔热板有点小问题

397
00:21:25,376 --> 00:21:26,959
‪那个小问题是什么?

398
00:21:26,959 --> 00:21:28,668
‪我还没装好

399
00:21:28,668 --> 00:21:30,376
‪我们都会在重返大气层时被烧死

400
00:21:30,376 --> 00:21:33,959
‪此话一出口
‪感觉上问题比想象中还要严重

401
00:21:33,959 --> 00:21:35,293
‪天啊!

402
00:21:35,876 --> 00:21:38,501
‪等等 什么?你脑袋是不是进水了?

403
00:21:42,501 --> 00:21:43,334
‪等一下 埃尔维斯

404
00:21:44,334 --> 00:21:45,251
‪你不能这么做

405
00:21:45,251 --> 00:21:47,501
‪你不能把自己伪装成人肉隔热板

406
00:21:47,501 --> 00:21:48,668
‪你会被活活烧死的!

407
00:21:48,668 --> 00:21:51,334
‪头儿 你确定要这么做吗?

408
00:21:51,334 --> 00:21:52,959
‪老兄 我还要赶去演唱会呢

409
00:21:52,959 --> 00:21:54,834
‪总不能让全场观众等我吧

410
00:21:54,834 --> 00:21:55,876
‪看着我

411
00:21:55,876 --> 00:21:57,668
‪别去!

412
00:21:57,668 --> 00:21:58,668
‪听好

413
00:21:59,459 --> 00:22:00,918
‪起码要试试才知道

414
00:22:01,876 --> 00:22:03,251
‪你们最好坐稳了

415
00:22:07,043 --> 00:22:08,168
‪你们知道吗?

416
00:22:08,168 --> 00:22:11,043
‪我刚意识到
‪我还没打去安抚普瑞希拉呢

417
00:22:11,043 --> 00:22:13,001
‪这搞不好是个不祥的预兆

418
00:22:13,001 --> 00:22:14,668
‪你先顾好自己吧

419
00:22:15,168 --> 00:22:18,709
‪感情方面 确实是个不祥的预兆

420
00:22:45,626 --> 00:22:50,626
‪霍华德 听好
‪我要你重启复制人研究计划

421
00:22:52,001 --> 00:22:53,459
‪这项研究计划喊停过吗?

422
00:22:54,043 --> 00:22:57,626
‪没错 我们可能需要一个新的猫王了

423
00:24:02,168 --> 00:24:05,293
‪字幕翻译:张庆龄