1
00:00:14,793 --> 00:00:18,251
{\an8}‪(路易斯安那州費里迪,1956年)

2
00:00:27,126 --> 00:00:28,501
‪(RCA唱片公司)

3
00:00:28,501 --> 00:00:34,543
‪(貓王)

4
00:00:40,126 --> 00:00:41,334
‪-加百列
‪-爸爸!

5
00:00:41,876 --> 00:00:45,084
‪你今晚不是要上電視佈道嗎?

6
00:00:45,084 --> 00:00:46,626
‪對啊

7
00:00:46,626 --> 00:00:51,668
‪今晚主題是耶穌與沙漠中的惡魔決鬥

8
00:00:51,668 --> 00:00:53,959
‪然後耶穌贏了

9
00:00:53,959 --> 00:00:55,251
‪多虧了空手道

10
00:00:55,251 --> 00:00:56,668
‪等等,真的嗎?

11
00:00:56,668 --> 00:01:00,376
‪但我並不曉得回到家

12
00:01:00,376 --> 00:01:05,668
‪會聽到我家正在播撒旦的音樂

13
00:01:05,668 --> 00:01:08,126
‪這...我發誓不會再發生了

14
00:01:08,876 --> 00:01:11,668
{\an8}‪天啊,我可以保證

15
00:01:20,709 --> 00:01:25,043
‪我將這張惡魔的黑膠驅逐至火...

16
00:01:25,876 --> 00:01:27,209
‪很好...糟了

17
00:01:28,084 --> 00:01:29,001
‪爸爸!

18
00:01:29,501 --> 00:01:31,251
‪可惡的聚酯纖維!

19
00:01:38,918 --> 00:01:39,751
‪爸爸!

20
00:01:48,459 --> 00:01:49,293
‪貓王!

21
00:01:50,043 --> 00:01:55,084
‪你害我爸著火並淹死了!

22
00:02:04,668 --> 00:02:06,418
‪妳看吧?我是怎麼說的?

23
00:02:06,418 --> 00:02:08,376
{\an8}‪這裡挺不錯的

24
00:02:08,376 --> 00:02:11,543
{\an8}‪我答應過要花更多時間經營婚姻
‪從現在開始算

25
00:02:12,043 --> 00:02:13,959
‪我好像在哪聽過這句話

26
00:02:13,959 --> 00:02:16,168
‪妳不相信我吧

27
00:02:16,168 --> 00:02:17,709
‪冒昧打擾...

28
00:02:17,709 --> 00:02:19,459
‪但你還是明知故犯

29
00:02:19,459 --> 00:02:20,584
‪我只想打個招呼

30
00:02:20,584 --> 00:02:22,668
‪那你成功了,大哥,做得好

31
00:02:22,668 --> 00:02:24,501
‪對了,我是加百列沃爾夫

32
00:02:24,501 --> 00:02:26,501
‪沃爾夫世界通訊社的總裁

33
00:02:26,501 --> 00:02:28,168
‪我很期待你的演唱會

34
00:02:28,168 --> 00:02:31,459
‪這是全球首次由衛星直播的演唱會

35
00:02:31,459 --> 00:02:33,084
‪怎麼可能不期待?

36
00:02:33,918 --> 00:02:37,751
‪我們有競標轉播權
‪但輸給了全國廣播公司,可惡

37
00:02:37,751 --> 00:02:38,793
‪魚與熊掌不可兼得

38
00:02:38,793 --> 00:02:42,001
‪加百列,根據我的個人生活經驗

39
00:02:42,001 --> 00:02:43,501
‪其實是辦得到的

40
00:02:43,501 --> 00:02:44,459
‪請讓我們靜一靜

41
00:02:46,168 --> 00:02:47,209
‪當然

42
00:02:47,209 --> 00:02:48,459
‪祝你明天好運

43
00:02:50,126 --> 00:02:52,418
‪嘿,你一定猜不到我剛才遇到誰

44
00:02:52,418 --> 00:02:54,668
‪確實猜不到,也不想猜

45
00:02:54,668 --> 00:02:57,668
‪《檀島警騎》的傑克勞德

46
00:02:58,501 --> 00:03:01,793
‪順帶一提,他不喜歡在男廁擁抱

47
00:03:01,793 --> 00:03:04,418
‪他來這裡拍戲,你也知道我是鐵粉

48
00:03:04,418 --> 00:03:06,418
‪傑克現在也知道了

49
00:03:06,418 --> 00:03:10,293
‪說到粉絲,你的粉絲越來越多了

50
00:03:11,459 --> 00:03:12,626
‪介意我去打個招呼嗎?

51
00:03:12,626 --> 00:03:14,626
‪喔,我習慣了

52
00:03:14,626 --> 00:03:16,084
‪馬上回來

53
00:03:17,459 --> 00:03:18,459
‪好

54
00:03:19,293 --> 00:03:20,126
‪是的,女士

55
00:03:20,126 --> 00:03:21,126
‪(貓王競選總統)

56
00:03:23,126 --> 00:03:24,876
‪非常感謝

57
00:03:25,459 --> 00:03:26,584
‪妳在這裡做什麼?

58
00:03:26,584 --> 00:03:30,668
‪我以為我在排隊拿何大來的簽名

59
00:03:30,668 --> 00:03:32,126
‪看來我要失望了

60
00:03:32,126 --> 00:03:33,293
‪過來

61
00:03:34,293 --> 00:03:37,334
‪如果妳是來挽留我的,別做夢了

62
00:03:37,876 --> 00:03:41,876
‪有人很狂妄自大呢,很好

63
00:03:41,876 --> 00:03:42,959
‪我是認真的

64
00:03:42,959 --> 00:03:45,668
‪提醒一下,這世界不是繞著你轉

65
00:03:46,293 --> 00:03:47,834
‪(我能懷上你的孩子嗎?)

66
00:03:47,834 --> 00:03:48,751
‪要打賭嗎?

67
00:03:49,418 --> 00:03:52,459
‪嘿,普太太,妳和貓王玩得開心嗎?

68
00:03:52,459 --> 00:03:53,834
‪幫我個忙,柏蒂

69
00:03:53,834 --> 00:03:55,584
‪如果他在那忙完了

70
00:03:55,584 --> 00:03:57,918
‪跟他說我搭飛機回孟菲斯了

71
00:03:58,918 --> 00:04:00,126
‪我才不管

72
00:04:00,126 --> 00:04:01,501
‪隨便你怎麼想

73
00:04:01,501 --> 00:04:03,876
‪你們離我遠一點

74
00:04:03,876 --> 00:04:04,834
‪沒問題

75
00:04:05,751 --> 00:04:06,959
‪請問一下...

76
00:04:06,959 --> 00:04:09,751
‪不,我不知道何大來住哪裡

77
00:04:09,751 --> 00:04:12,543
‪特務貓王

78
00:04:17,834 --> 00:04:21,126
{\an8}‪說到麻雀雖小,五臟俱全
‪下一個節目

79
00:04:21,126 --> 00:04:24,543
{\an8}‪新《007》電影的演員赫夫維勒查澤

80
00:04:24,543 --> 00:04:27,501
{\an8}‪來我們攝影棚接受獨家採訪

81
00:04:27,501 --> 00:04:29,334
{\an8}‪我在室內抽煙

82
00:04:29,959 --> 00:04:31,293
{\an8}‪這是在搞什麼鬼?

83
00:04:31,293 --> 00:04:32,501
{\an8}‪我現在才看到他

84
00:04:32,501 --> 00:04:36,084
{\an8}‪我兩天前叫他去大廳幫我拿洋芋片

85
00:04:36,626 --> 00:04:38,376
{\an8}‪看來他忘了拿洋芋片

86
00:04:38,376 --> 00:04:39,584
{\an8}‪他還活著嗎?

87
00:04:39,584 --> 00:04:40,501
{\an8}‪不知道

88
00:04:41,001 --> 00:04:42,334
{\an8}‪嘿,妳有看到普莉希拉嗎?

89
00:04:42,334 --> 00:04:45,084
{\an8}‪對,說到這...

90
00:04:46,626 --> 00:04:50,251
{\an8}‪不行,想都別想,可惡!

91
00:04:55,834 --> 00:04:56,959
‪(貓王夏威夷演唱會)

92
00:05:01,293 --> 00:05:04,501
{\an8}‪-什麼?
‪-我認得出你的追車臉

93
00:05:04,501 --> 00:05:08,293
{\an8}‪你要放下秘密特務的事,記得嗎?

94
00:05:09,543 --> 00:05:10,709
{\an8}‪普莉希拉呢?

95
00:05:10,709 --> 00:05:13,126
{\an8}‪-她必須搭飛機回孟菲斯
‪-真的嗎?

96
00:05:13,126 --> 00:05:17,084
{\an8}‪她臨時有事,你最好晚點打給她

97
00:05:17,084 --> 00:05:19,709
{\an8}‪但現在你得準備出門

98
00:05:19,709 --> 00:05:22,251
{\an8}‪巴比雷很快就會回來接你

99
00:05:22,251 --> 00:05:23,251
{\an8}‪從哪裡回來?

100
00:05:23,251 --> 00:05:24,959
{\an8}‪-他去接孩子
‪-什麼孩子?

101
00:05:24,959 --> 00:05:26,334
{\an8}‪那孩子

102
00:05:26,334 --> 00:05:30,918
{\an8}‪美好的一天,放下車頂
‪讓風吹過頭髮,是不是很棒?

103
00:05:32,043 --> 00:05:36,459
{\an8}‪對,我以為你會喜歡
‪讓我盡點心意,因為你知道的...

104
00:05:36,459 --> 00:05:38,501
{\an8}‪等一下,我們已經在拍了嗎?

105
00:05:38,501 --> 00:05:40,418
{\an8}‪等等,後座那是我的啤酒嗎?

106
00:05:44,209 --> 00:05:45,668
{\an8}‪我跟你說

107
00:05:45,668 --> 00:05:48,918
{\an8}‪你給我帶來了啟發

108
00:05:48,918 --> 00:05:51,584
{\an8}‪你是活生生的例子,既使氣管破裂

109
00:05:51,584 --> 00:05:54,293
{\an8}‪肺部塌陷、沒有脾臟、剩下半顆腎臟

110
00:05:54,293 --> 00:05:56,668
{\an8}‪總是有一絲希望

111
00:05:57,334 --> 00:06:00,793
{\an8}‪我不知道你有什麼希望
‪但至少你能見到貓王

112
00:06:00,793 --> 00:06:02,793
{\an8}‪見幾秒鐘而已,不能保證什麼

113
00:06:02,793 --> 00:06:03,793
{\an8}‪要喝啤酒嗎?

114
00:06:03,793 --> 00:06:06,084
{\an8}‪試音完後,回來這裡

115
00:06:06,084 --> 00:06:08,251
{\an8}‪我是說直接回到這裡

116
00:06:08,251 --> 00:06:10,126
{\an8}‪我感覺到妳有話要說

117
00:06:10,126 --> 00:06:12,751
{\an8}‪我昨晚看到你跟那個女人說話

118
00:06:12,751 --> 00:06:14,626
{\an8}‪穿小比基尼的無腦花瓶

119
00:06:14,626 --> 00:06:16,584
{\an8}‪好吧,這或許聽起來很糟

120
00:06:16,584 --> 00:06:18,668
{\an8}‪但妳得描述地更具體一點

121
00:06:19,251 --> 00:06:20,376
‪就拜託你們了

122
00:06:20,376 --> 00:06:21,418
‪你們所有人

123
00:06:21,418 --> 00:06:24,418
‪西西、《檀島警騎》的傑克勞德

124
00:06:24,418 --> 00:06:26,459
‪沒有人比你更熟悉這座島了

125
00:06:26,459 --> 00:06:28,543
‪實力派演員赫夫維勒查澤

126
00:06:28,543 --> 00:06:31,543
‪是時候好好利用你嬌小玲瓏的身型

127
00:06:31,543 --> 00:06:35,084
‪把任務搞定,否則數以百萬人會喪命

128
00:06:35,084 --> 00:06:37,876
‪所以沒有壓力,太好了,謝啦

129
00:06:37,876 --> 00:06:39,084
‪有其他有趣的消息嗎?

130
00:06:39,084 --> 00:06:42,334
‪另一件事,我們一直在找的壞人

131
00:06:42,334 --> 00:06:43,584
‪我們終於有名字了

132
00:06:43,584 --> 00:06:46,376
‪我們逮到拿著那張藍圖的混蛋時

133
00:06:46,376 --> 00:06:47,751
‪他只說了一個詞

134
00:06:47,751 --> 00:06:49,126
‪馬勒斯

135
00:06:49,126 --> 00:06:50,751
‪他還戴著這個

136
00:06:50,751 --> 00:06:52,793
‪那是他的手指嗎?

137
00:06:52,793 --> 00:06:55,209
‪我拿別人的手指要幹嘛?

138
00:06:55,209 --> 00:06:57,209
‪要是那樣就太扯了

139
00:07:02,626 --> 00:07:04,459
‪妳好啊,布奇熊

140
00:07:04,459 --> 00:07:06,668
‪不要那樣叫我,妳來這裡做什麼?

141
00:07:06,668 --> 00:07:09,501
‪怎麼了?女生不能來夏威夷玩嗎?

142
00:07:09,501 --> 00:07:11,793
‪跟那個自負的混蛋?

143
00:07:11,793 --> 00:07:12,918
‪不行

144
00:07:13,959 --> 00:07:15,626
‪他是不是很棒?

145
00:07:15,626 --> 00:07:18,418
‪我們最近重燃舊火

146
00:07:18,418 --> 00:07:20,168
‪我們在越南巧遇

147
00:07:20,168 --> 00:07:23,959
‪在那之後我就被他迷住了

148
00:07:23,959 --> 00:07:27,043
‪-等一下
‪-簡直就像童話故事

149
00:07:27,043 --> 00:07:29,876
‪我是指假如童話故事有

150
00:07:29,876 --> 00:07:32,418
‪更多伏特加通寧和口交

151
00:07:33,084 --> 00:07:34,251
‪天啊

152
00:07:35,043 --> 00:07:36,209
‪妳還好嗎?

153
00:07:36,209 --> 00:07:38,501
‪閉嘴,重燃舊火是什麼意思?

154
00:07:38,501 --> 00:07:41,668
‪我們在妳還沒出生前交往了一陣子

155
00:07:41,668 --> 00:07:44,459
‪妳要是跟我說羅伯特高勒特是我父親

156
00:07:44,459 --> 00:07:46,459
‪我就開槍殺了你們兩個

157
00:07:46,459 --> 00:07:47,751
‪不停反覆開槍

158
00:07:47,751 --> 00:07:50,501
‪放輕鬆,不可能的

159
00:07:50,501 --> 00:07:51,459
‪我不這麼認為

160
00:07:54,834 --> 00:07:58,543
‪媽的!

161
00:07:59,209 --> 00:08:00,459
‪媽的

162
00:08:00,459 --> 00:08:01,376
‪我要走了

163
00:08:01,376 --> 00:08:04,459
‪我跟你說
‪傑克勞德算是這座島的市長

164
00:08:04,459 --> 00:08:07,001
‪他還住在這裡
‪我能帶你去看他的房子

165
00:08:07,001 --> 00:08:10,793
‪但只能從車上看
‪保護令上寫得很清楚

166
00:08:16,584 --> 00:08:18,126
‪嘿,西西,東西的西

167
00:08:18,709 --> 00:08:20,209
‪不要啊!

168
00:08:21,959 --> 00:08:23,918
‪哇靠!

169
00:08:23,918 --> 00:08:26,084
‪不!赫夫!小心車子!

170
00:08:28,251 --> 00:08:29,376
‪有話快說

171
00:08:30,751 --> 00:08:32,459
‪搞屁啊?兩個都被撞?

172
00:08:34,251 --> 00:08:35,084
‪(阿羅哈)

173
00:08:35,084 --> 00:08:38,501
‪我想嚐嚐阿羅哈塔可餅

174
00:08:38,501 --> 00:08:40,376
‪送你一輛凱迪拉克,大哥

175
00:08:40,376 --> 00:08:42,043
‪好的,先生

176
00:08:42,043 --> 00:08:44,001
‪還想點什麼嗎,普里斯萊先生?

177
00:08:44,001 --> 00:08:46,668
‪來份卑鄙小人當配菜

178
00:08:46,668 --> 00:08:50,168
‪等一下,算了,我身邊就有一個

179
00:08:50,834 --> 00:08:51,668
‪滾邊去

180
00:08:51,668 --> 00:08:54,751
‪你就這麼迎接老朋友嗎?

181
00:08:54,751 --> 00:08:56,918
‪你哪算老朋友,滾開

182
00:08:56,918 --> 00:08:59,501
‪來問候一下,看看你過得如何,兄弟

183
00:08:59,501 --> 00:09:03,959
‪我要在全世界面前
‪演出我這輩子最大的演唱會

184
00:09:03,959 --> 00:09:06,501
‪-哇
‪-沒有你,我也過得很好

185
00:09:07,293 --> 00:09:09,626
‪對啊,我要請你幫個忙

186
00:09:09,626 --> 00:09:11,293
‪滾開

187
00:09:11,293 --> 00:09:12,584
‪我都聽得懂

188
00:09:12,584 --> 00:09:15,501
‪但假如我告訴你
‪你的演唱會有問題呢?

189
00:09:16,001 --> 00:09:17,168
‪-把話說清楚
‪-好

190
00:09:17,834 --> 00:09:20,459
‪記得我們一直在找的聲波武器嗎?

191
00:09:20,459 --> 00:09:23,251
‪我們追蹤了武器的輻射分子...

192
00:09:23,251 --> 00:09:24,584
‪說得更簡潔一點

193
00:09:24,584 --> 00:09:25,584
‪...追到外太空

194
00:09:25,584 --> 00:09:27,001
‪你在說什麼?

195
00:09:27,001 --> 00:09:29,084
‪聽到這就有興趣了吧

196
00:09:29,793 --> 00:09:30,876
‪好喔

197
00:09:30,876 --> 00:09:33,459
‪吸附在直播演唱會的衛星上

198
00:09:33,459 --> 00:09:35,334
‪供數百萬名貓王歌迷觀賞...

199
00:09:35,334 --> 00:09:36,709
‪更像是數十億

200
00:09:37,709 --> 00:09:39,043
‪這數字聽起來有點高

201
00:09:39,043 --> 00:09:43,293
‪你的演唱會和音樂將感染全世界觀眾

202
00:09:43,293 --> 00:09:47,251
‪將他們變成兇殘的瘋子
‪這將是全球性的大屠殺

203
00:09:47,251 --> 00:09:50,501
‪那你還坐在這裡幹嘛?快去處理

204
00:09:50,501 --> 00:09:51,709
‪所以我才需要你

205
00:09:51,709 --> 00:09:52,834
‪你有其他手下

206
00:09:52,834 --> 00:09:54,584
‪我有手下嗎?猜猜看

207
00:09:54,584 --> 00:09:57,918
‪兩個手下在停車場
‪被你的白痴朋友開車碾過

208
00:09:57,918 --> 00:09:59,668
‪該死的巴比雷

209
00:09:59,668 --> 00:10:01,293
‪我沒有信任的人了

210
00:10:01,293 --> 00:10:02,584
‪你在說什麼?

211
00:10:02,584 --> 00:10:05,126
‪TCB有內鬼、叛徒

212
00:10:05,126 --> 00:10:07,668
‪-什麼?
‪-遭竊的聲波科技武器

213
00:10:07,668 --> 00:10:09,418
‪一定是內鬼做的

214
00:10:14,001 --> 00:10:15,043
‪再過不了多久

215
00:10:15,584 --> 00:10:16,918
‪我的壓軸好戲

216
00:10:16,918 --> 00:10:20,251
‪今晚過後,貓王再也不會受到愛戴

217
00:10:20,251 --> 00:10:21,543
‪他會被世人唾棄

218
00:10:22,209 --> 00:10:25,001
‪你問我為何不讓你
‪在青商會頒獎典禮上殺了他

219
00:10:25,001 --> 00:10:26,209
‪今天就是原因

220
00:10:27,918 --> 00:10:29,501
‪貓王將遺臭萬年

221
00:10:29,501 --> 00:10:32,043
‪他的音樂導致數百萬人死去

222
00:10:32,043 --> 00:10:34,959
‪全世界終於要像我一樣厭惡貓王

223
00:10:34,959 --> 00:10:36,793
‪因為《聖經》預言

224
00:10:36,793 --> 00:10:40,084
‪“唱著傷風敗俗的歌
‪服裝華麗、穿斗篷的男人

225
00:10:40,084 --> 00:10:42,501
‪終於要被打敗了”

226
00:10:42,501 --> 00:10:45,084
‪《利未記》4:12,我很確定

227
00:10:46,543 --> 00:10:48,001
‪我覺得都差不多

228
00:10:49,834 --> 00:10:51,209
‪讓我把話說清楚

229
00:10:51,751 --> 00:10:53,751
‪你讓我被徵召入伍

230
00:10:53,751 --> 00:10:56,918
‪好讓你根據我的DNA
‪創造出心智控制的裝置

231
00:10:56,918 --> 00:10:57,959
‪後來你還搞丟

232
00:10:57,959 --> 00:11:01,459
‪現在卻落在一顆
‪即將毀滅世界的衛星上

233
00:11:01,459 --> 00:11:03,584
‪你還想要我去處理?

234
00:11:04,293 --> 00:11:07,543
‪真曲折離奇,但沒錯

235
00:11:07,543 --> 00:11:11,168
‪你知道你是要我
‪拯救自己摧毀的世界嗎?

236
00:11:11,168 --> 00:11:14,084
‪對,如果不是這場演唱會
‪就是下一場

237
00:11:14,084 --> 00:11:16,293
‪可惡,你知道嗎?

238
00:11:16,293 --> 00:11:18,793
‪在我遇見你之前,我過得更好

239
00:11:19,751 --> 00:11:23,001
‪省省吧,你以前兼差當小混混

240
00:11:23,001 --> 00:11:24,293
‪超可悲的

241
00:11:24,293 --> 00:11:26,209
‪我將你打造成國際巨星,小子

242
00:11:26,209 --> 00:11:29,543
‪不,你的狗屁點子將我打進無底深淵

243
00:11:29,543 --> 00:11:32,209
‪對,後來你對我開了兩槍後辭職

244
00:11:32,209 --> 00:11:33,459
‪我為你做了那麼多

245
00:11:33,459 --> 00:11:35,459
‪這教我情何以堪?

246
00:11:35,459 --> 00:11:36,501
‪算了吧

247
00:11:36,501 --> 00:11:40,376
‪-我的感情被雞奸了
‪-這是哪來的比喻?

248
00:11:40,376 --> 00:11:41,959
‪編輯室吧,我哪知

249
00:11:41,959 --> 00:11:44,084
‪重點是,你到底要不要幫我?

250
00:11:44,084 --> 00:11:45,709
‪我們快沒時間了

251
00:11:49,751 --> 00:11:51,251
‪好,我去

252
00:11:51,251 --> 00:11:53,251
‪但不是因為你要我去

253
00:11:53,251 --> 00:11:56,626
‪而因為這些混蛋不能毀了我的節目

254
00:11:56,626 --> 00:12:00,793
‪還有“貓王拯救世界”聽起來挺威風的

255
00:12:01,459 --> 00:12:03,668
‪我還沒跟你說最棒的部分

256
00:12:14,459 --> 00:12:16,959
‪你的心思有這麼好猜嗎?

257
00:12:17,543 --> 00:12:18,376
‪妳說什麼?

258
00:12:18,376 --> 00:12:20,584
‪我就知道你會愛上噴射背包

259
00:12:20,584 --> 00:12:21,793
‪他來這裡做什麼?

260
00:12:21,793 --> 00:12:24,168
‪我的洋芋片呢?

261
00:12:24,709 --> 00:12:27,584
‪抱歉,我得借用你的小朋友
‪我們需要他

262
00:12:27,584 --> 00:12:28,959
‪-為什麼?
‪-因為這個

263
00:12:31,418 --> 00:12:33,751
‪太空艙是特地為了讓赫夫

264
00:12:33,751 --> 00:12:36,876
‪飛上衛星解除聲波武器而設計的

265
00:12:36,876 --> 00:12:39,793
‪但既然赫夫正在停車場血流不止

266
00:12:39,793 --> 00:12:41,959
‪我們就得退而求其次

267
00:12:42,543 --> 00:12:44,168
‪記得美國太空總署的混帳嗎?

268
00:12:44,168 --> 00:12:47,334
‪他們因為合理的原因開除了你

269
00:12:47,334 --> 00:12:50,876
‪你要藉這個機會證明他們錯了
‪打起精神來

270
00:12:53,793 --> 00:12:54,626
‪好吧

271
00:12:55,418 --> 00:12:57,001
‪不可能會搞砸的

272
00:13:06,709 --> 00:13:08,793
‪一路順風,小醉猴

273
00:13:08,793 --> 00:13:10,084
‪一路順風

274
00:13:14,709 --> 00:13:16,251
‪柏蒂,妳在...

275
00:13:20,043 --> 00:13:21,084
‪史卡特沒事嗎?

276
00:13:21,084 --> 00:13:23,293
‪他沒事,這是火箭的遙測

277
00:13:23,293 --> 00:13:25,543
‪我們知道島上某處有個信號站

278
00:13:25,543 --> 00:13:28,459
‪入侵了衛星,現在知道在哪了

279
00:13:29,751 --> 00:13:31,876
‪那我們還等什麼?

280
00:13:35,126 --> 00:13:38,501
‪從拉斯維加斯開始
‪貓王就有你的電擊槍

281
00:13:39,001 --> 00:13:39,834
‪他很喜歡

282
00:13:41,459 --> 00:13:44,126
‪-我也越來越喜歡它了
‪-等等

283
00:13:44,126 --> 00:13:45,793
‪等等,好吧

284
00:13:45,793 --> 00:13:49,709
‪首先,我現在有點性奮
‪說說而已啦,再來...

285
00:13:49,709 --> 00:13:50,751
‪-閉嘴!
‪-收到

286
00:13:50,751 --> 00:13:53,209
‪我們家貓王在哪裡?

287
00:13:54,001 --> 00:13:55,709
‪做他註定要做的事

288
00:13:55,709 --> 00:13:59,168
‪我不會再讓你毀了那男孩的人生

289
00:13:59,168 --> 00:14:00,459
‪毀了他的人生?

290
00:14:01,001 --> 00:14:03,501
‪那傢伙現在正要拯救世界

291
00:14:03,501 --> 00:14:06,584
‪而妳卻要他去他媽的試音

292
00:14:09,543 --> 00:14:12,793
‪他最好毫髮無傷,不然就有你好看的

293
00:14:12,793 --> 00:14:14,543
‪到底有什麼好看?

294
00:14:16,209 --> 00:14:20,626
‪好吧,如果妳再不放下那玩意
‪會有兩種下場

295
00:14:25,001 --> 00:14:26,793
‪不知道另一種是什麼

296
00:14:31,709 --> 00:14:35,293
‪看來我們的目標是超大的M字

297
00:14:41,001 --> 00:14:42,334
‪(馬鈴薯片)

298
00:14:55,126 --> 00:14:56,376
‪壞人都跑去哪了?

299
00:14:57,959 --> 00:15:00,293
‪妳就是非問不可嗎?

300
00:15:12,209 --> 00:15:13,168
‪媽的!

301
00:15:18,876 --> 00:15:21,001
‪快樂的時間總是過得特別快

302
00:15:28,126 --> 00:15:31,751
‪老實說,我不知道哪個比較好
‪瞄準能力或入場方式

303
00:15:32,751 --> 00:15:33,668
‪謝謝你相救

304
00:15:33,668 --> 00:15:34,668
‪不客氣

305
00:15:34,668 --> 00:15:36,459
‪什麼?你居然救了我?

306
00:15:37,418 --> 00:15:38,543
‪沒問題

307
00:15:38,543 --> 00:15:41,084
‪朋友,你現在要去演唱會表演

308
00:15:41,084 --> 00:15:44,001
‪先拿出那個硬碟才行

309
00:15:44,001 --> 00:15:47,293
‪去表演吧,我會處理的,相信我

310
00:15:48,626 --> 00:15:50,418
‪你知道嗎?我不相信

311
00:15:52,459 --> 00:15:53,793
‪你在做什麼?

312
00:15:53,793 --> 00:15:57,001
‪你忘了檢查火箭砲手柄

313
00:15:57,001 --> 00:15:58,376
‪可惡

314
00:15:58,376 --> 00:16:00,376
‪他們把愚蠢的M印在所有東西上

315
00:16:00,376 --> 00:16:02,751
‪搞得像是在賣分時度假權

316
00:16:02,751 --> 00:16:05,043
‪所以你就是那個叛徒

317
00:16:05,043 --> 00:16:07,209
‪叛徒這個詞真難聽

318
00:16:07,209 --> 00:16:08,793
‪精準,但難聽

319
00:16:15,001 --> 00:16:17,501
‪好個自大的混蛋

320
00:16:17,501 --> 00:16:18,626
‪更正

321
00:16:18,626 --> 00:16:21,584
‪獲得東尼獎肯定的自大混蛋!

322
00:16:21,584 --> 00:16:23,251
‪差別可大了

323
00:16:26,293 --> 00:16:28,293
‪好吧,爛透了

324
00:16:28,293 --> 00:16:30,584
‪拜託,別這樣

325
00:16:31,751 --> 00:16:33,709
‪有趣的部分正要開始呢

326
00:16:33,709 --> 00:16:35,001
‪對我來說啦

327
00:16:36,001 --> 00:16:37,709
‪記得從軍時

328
00:16:37,709 --> 00:16:40,251
‪指揮官對你進行的實驗嗎?

329
00:16:41,293 --> 00:16:42,501
‪我也在場

330
00:16:44,168 --> 00:16:47,001
‪當時我是指揮官的左右手

331
00:16:48,876 --> 00:16:52,834
‪我親眼看見你變成一頭野獸
‪你應該要死的

332
00:16:53,501 --> 00:16:56,209
‪-抱歉讓你失望了
‪-然後你復出了

333
00:16:56,793 --> 00:16:59,793
‪大搖大擺走進TCB,彷彿是你家開的

334
00:16:59,793 --> 00:17:05,334
‪還有你的油頭、有稜有角的下顎線

335
00:17:05,334 --> 00:17:08,043
‪微翹且誘人的嘴唇

336
00:17:08,876 --> 00:17:11,209
‪我開始覺得這跟別的事有關

337
00:17:12,001 --> 00:17:13,959
‪好像你還沒擁有一切

338
00:17:13,959 --> 00:17:16,168
‪才華、成群的粉絲

339
00:17:16,168 --> 00:17:17,834
‪美妙的音樂

340
00:17:17,834 --> 00:17:19,251
‪那樣還不夠嗎?

341
00:17:19,251 --> 00:17:23,126
‪你還要把TCB從我身邊搶走?

342
00:17:24,834 --> 00:17:26,418
‪所以你喜歡我的音樂

343
00:17:27,626 --> 00:17:30,251
‪你只聽到那句話嗎?

344
00:17:32,626 --> 00:17:35,209
‪嘿!你不是應該在上我媽嗎?

345
00:17:38,501 --> 00:17:39,501
‪你沒事吧?

346
00:17:40,084 --> 00:17:40,918
‪沒事

347
00:17:40,918 --> 00:17:43,584
‪-那是怎麼回事?
‪-該死的高勒特

348
00:17:43,584 --> 00:17:45,793
‪有趣的臨終遺言

349
00:17:45,793 --> 00:17:48,126
‪但至少我有參與到

350
00:17:56,459 --> 00:17:59,751
‪我有錯過什麼嗎?妳幹嘛這麼做?

351
00:17:59,751 --> 00:18:02,751
‪信不信由你,他可能是我爸

352
00:18:03,793 --> 00:18:05,084
‪那又如何?

353
00:18:22,709 --> 00:18:24,084
‪搞什麼?

354
00:18:38,459 --> 00:18:41,209
‪(警告,氧氣不足,剩下6%)

355
00:18:42,543 --> 00:18:45,626
‪妳的超級好爸爸不介意我借來用吧?

356
00:18:45,626 --> 00:18:46,543
‪閉嘴

357
00:18:53,168 --> 00:18:55,293
‪不...

358
00:18:55,876 --> 00:19:00,001
‪以耶穌和他的七位小矮人使者之名

359
00:19:00,001 --> 00:19:01,709
‪我發誓絕不會善罷甘休

360
00:19:03,001 --> 00:19:04,376
‪該死的高勒特

361
00:19:04,376 --> 00:19:06,251
‪你是認真的嗎?他是內鬼?

362
00:19:06,251 --> 00:19:07,209
‪沒錯

363
00:19:07,209 --> 00:19:10,626
‪這些年來我一直都說這傢伙是人渣

364
00:19:11,209 --> 00:19:14,168
‪不管怎樣,做得很好

365
00:19:14,168 --> 00:19:16,793
‪等史卡特回來,我們得去接他

366
00:19:16,793 --> 00:19:19,751
‪回來?你在想...

367
00:19:19,751 --> 00:19:22,501
‪那是單程旅行,他會被困在那裡

368
00:19:22,501 --> 00:19:24,459
‪你到底在說什麼?

369
00:19:24,459 --> 00:19:26,751
‪換做是赫夫也會這麼說

370
00:19:26,751 --> 00:19:28,293
‪所以我也沒告訴他

371
00:19:31,126 --> 00:19:33,584
‪-你要去哪裡?
‪-去機場,該死!

372
00:19:35,501 --> 00:19:37,501
‪天啊,我喜歡他的憤怒能量

373
00:19:38,084 --> 00:19:40,793
‪讓我搞清楚
‪假冒阿波羅號登陸月球後

374
00:19:40,793 --> 00:19:44,334
‪你感到非常嫉妒,於是花了數百萬元

375
00:19:44,334 --> 00:19:47,501
‪將這輛飛機改造成半吊子的太空船?

376
00:19:48,376 --> 00:19:52,001
‪妳這樣說聽起來有點可悲

377
00:20:06,126 --> 00:20:07,876
‪你還帶了你的葛萊美獎?

378
00:20:10,584 --> 00:20:13,043
‪那是...洋芋片嗎?

379
00:20:14,084 --> 00:20:15,751
‪那個小混蛋

380
00:20:16,334 --> 00:20:17,168
‪等一下

381
00:20:17,751 --> 00:20:18,668
‪搞屁啊?

382
00:20:31,751 --> 00:20:33,793
‪(警告,氧氣不足,剩下0%)

383
00:20:40,918 --> 00:20:43,001
‪那真是太噁了

384
00:20:43,001 --> 00:20:44,293
‪我要去救他

385
00:20:45,251 --> 00:20:48,751
‪你剛好有尼爾阿姆斯壯的太空服?

386
00:20:49,918 --> 00:20:51,543
‪算是吧

387
00:20:51,543 --> 00:20:52,543
‪等一下

388
00:20:52,543 --> 00:20:56,709
‪你們這兩個笨蛋
‪竟然想開這爛東西去月球?

389
00:20:59,251 --> 00:21:00,334
‪快醒醒,可惡

390
00:21:00,334 --> 00:21:03,126
‪我覺得你應該要嘴對嘴人工呼吸

391
00:21:03,126 --> 00:21:05,376
‪雖然有得到性病的風險

392
00:21:13,626 --> 00:21:15,584
‪為什麼會這樣?

393
00:21:15,584 --> 00:21:17,209
‪天啊,我們能回家嗎?

394
00:21:17,209 --> 00:21:19,709
‪對了,說到回家

395
00:21:19,709 --> 00:21:20,959
‪不幸的是,不行

396
00:21:20,959 --> 00:21:22,376
‪你在說什麼?

397
00:21:22,376 --> 00:21:24,376
‪防熱罩出了點小問題

398
00:21:25,376 --> 00:21:26,959
‪什麼小問題?

399
00:21:26,959 --> 00:21:28,668
‪我還沒裝

400
00:21:28,668 --> 00:21:30,376
‪我們會在重返時起火燃燒

401
00:21:30,376 --> 00:21:33,959
‪說出來之後,這好像比小問題還嚴重

402
00:21:33,959 --> 00:21:35,293
‪天啊...老天

403
00:21:35,876 --> 00:21:38,501
‪等等,什麼?你瘋了嗎?

404
00:21:42,501 --> 00:21:43,334
‪等等,貓王

405
00:21:44,334 --> 00:21:45,251
‪你不能這麼做

406
00:21:45,251 --> 00:21:47,501
‪你不能充當人肉防熱罩

407
00:21:47,501 --> 00:21:48,668
‪你會被活活燒死!

408
00:21:48,668 --> 00:21:51,334
‪老大,你確定嗎?

409
00:21:51,334 --> 00:21:52,959
‪我要上台表演,兄弟

410
00:21:52,959 --> 00:21:54,834
‪永遠不能讓座無虛席的觀眾等待

411
00:21:54,834 --> 00:21:55,876
‪嘿,看著我

412
00:21:55,876 --> 00:21:57,668
‪別這麼做!

413
00:21:57,668 --> 00:21:58,668
‪聽著

414
00:21:59,459 --> 00:22:00,918
‪我起碼得試試看

415
00:22:01,876 --> 00:22:03,251
‪你們最好繫上安全帶

416
00:22:07,043 --> 00:22:08,168
‪你知道嗎?

417
00:22:08,168 --> 00:22:11,043
‪我剛剛才發現,我還沒打給普莉希拉

418
00:22:11,043 --> 00:22:13,001
‪那大概不是個好現象

419
00:22:13,001 --> 00:22:14,668
‪先顧好你自己吧

420
00:22:15,168 --> 00:22:18,709
‪但就感情來說,這不是個好現象

421
00:22:45,626 --> 00:22:50,626
‪霍華,我要請你繼續進行複製人研究

422
00:22:52,001 --> 00:22:53,459
‪你有要我停下來喔?

423
00:22:54,043 --> 00:22:57,626
‪對,我們可能需要新的貓王

424
00:24:02,168 --> 00:24:05,293
‪字幕翻譯:張瀛