1 00:00:01,835 --> 00:00:03,203        - My sister and I                 immigrated here          2 00:00:03,269 --> 00:00:05,672  because I caught the attention       of a man who helped us.     3 00:00:05,739 --> 00:00:07,941       - You and Amira were              part of our family.       4 00:00:08,008 --> 00:00:09,342   You just packed up and left.   5 00:00:09,409 --> 00:00:11,578        - Hydromorphone.            - If you have pain, Claire,    6 00:00:11,644 --> 00:00:12,746   that pain should be managed.   7 00:00:12,812 --> 00:00:14,581        We're going to make            an accountability plan      8 00:00:14,647 --> 00:00:17,484       for the painkillers.       So that they stay under control. 9 00:00:17,550 --> 00:00:21,755    - Yeah, I want kids, too.       I have no idea how I'd make     that work or if I can even...   10 00:00:22,522 --> 00:00:24,457    - I want you to think long         and hard about whether      11 00:00:24,524 --> 00:00:25,658   this is the right profession               for you.             12 00:00:25,725 --> 00:00:27,160       - Dr. Novak, I think             you made your point.       13 00:00:27,227 --> 00:00:29,796    - This mess is not a good           look for Trauma OR.        14 00:00:29,863 --> 00:00:31,831          - In that case,             you can have the future.     15 00:00:31,898 --> 00:00:35,001     June, say whatever you           want to Ryan, I am out.      16 00:00:35,802 --> 00:00:38,338 - This is an example of why you    didn't get the fellowship.     17 00:00:38,405 --> 00:00:41,207  This instinct to leap blindly.  18 00:00:41,274 --> 00:00:43,576      - Every time I think             I've built something,       19 00:00:43,643 --> 00:00:46,212        that feeling fades                 and I just run.         20 00:00:46,279 --> 00:00:49,082        - A heart may come               tomorrow or never.        21 00:00:49,149 --> 00:00:51,718       - This is good news.            - Like, I got the job?      22 00:00:51,785 --> 00:00:54,387  - Have any doubts or concerns?              - No, no.            23 00:00:54,454 --> 00:00:56,623    - There's a heart waiting        and it's a perfect match.     24 00:00:56,689 --> 00:00:58,258      I need you to confirm.      25 00:00:58,324 --> 00:01:01,094  Are you accepting this heart?   26 00:01:03,396 --> 00:01:07,100   - Yeah, I... I can be at the        hospital in 20 minutes.     27 00:01:07,167 --> 00:01:08,301          - Great news.           28 00:01:08,368 --> 00:01:10,670     I'll inform the surgeon           and connect with you        29 00:01:10,737 --> 00:01:13,173        once you get here.             Congratulations, Mags.      30 00:01:13,239 --> 00:01:14,707        - Thanks, Connie.         31 00:01:16,042 --> 00:01:18,678        Uh... I have to go.       32 00:01:18,745 --> 00:01:22,982      I just, uh... I just             matched with a heart.       33 00:01:26,753 --> 00:01:28,955           - Already?               - Yeah, I've been on a list    34 00:01:29,022 --> 00:01:31,624        for a few months.             - Sorry, you're leaving      35 00:01:31,691 --> 00:01:34,260        right now to go get              a heart transplant?       36 00:01:34,327 --> 00:01:38,465   - To do, uh, a pre-surgical     work-up before anything else.   37 00:01:38,531 --> 00:01:41,201   But, uh... What do I bring?    38 00:01:41,267 --> 00:01:43,169         I didn't ask what              I should bring. I...       39 00:01:43,236 --> 00:01:45,305      - You want us to come               with you? We--           40 00:01:45,371 --> 00:01:48,341             - No, no.                 It's like a sick joke.      41 00:01:48,408 --> 00:01:50,777      I'm like in the middle          of celebrating the thing     42 00:01:50,844 --> 00:01:54,614    I've wanted my whole life.       Why is this happening now?    43 00:01:54,681 --> 00:01:56,216              - Hey.              44 00:01:56,282 --> 00:01:57,917      It's going to be okay.      45 00:01:58,718 --> 00:02:00,653   - Thank you guys for coming.   46 00:02:02,455 --> 00:02:04,157             - Mags.              47 00:02:05,058 --> 00:02:07,827         Let me take you.               - No. No, it's okay.       48 00:02:07,894 --> 00:02:10,130    I think I just need to...     49 00:02:10,196 --> 00:02:12,298        Okay? Are you okay?       50 00:02:12,365 --> 00:02:14,200         - Shouldn't I be                 asking you that?         51 00:02:14,267 --> 00:02:19,339    - Uh, I... would not know            how to... answer.         52 00:02:20,507 --> 00:02:22,775       Are you on tomorrow?                   - Uh-huh.            53 00:02:22,842 --> 00:02:24,477          - Come see me.          54 00:02:31,518 --> 00:02:35,755    - In my head, where? How?               The tumour.            55 00:02:35,822 --> 00:02:39,425    - Uh, it's in the frontal           lobe of your brain.        56 00:02:39,993 --> 00:02:41,828      - Guess that explains                the headache.           57 00:02:41,895 --> 00:02:45,698 - Which you've had for how long?             - Months.            58 00:02:45,765 --> 00:02:48,902       Like I said when you              first examined me.        59 00:02:48,968 --> 00:02:51,204        What happens now?         60 00:02:51,271 --> 00:02:53,673     Hey, are you listening?      61 00:02:59,913 --> 00:03:01,347           - Hey, man.            62 00:03:01,414 --> 00:03:03,583   I saw your text and my admin        said you were waiting,      63 00:03:03,650 --> 00:03:05,418   but I'm pretty wall-to-wall        today so unless it's--       64 00:03:05,485 --> 00:03:07,887    - I was just in the middle         of talking to a patient     65 00:03:07,954 --> 00:03:09,589      and I realized that...      66 00:03:10,690 --> 00:03:13,193         I can't remember                the last 14 hours.        67 00:03:14,093 --> 00:03:16,996         (opening theme)          68 00:03:28,975 --> 00:03:32,111        It's like you know              when you drove home,       69 00:03:32,178 --> 00:03:34,080      but you don't remember                the journey.           70 00:03:34,147 --> 00:03:36,482    I... I zone out sometimes,    71 00:03:36,549 --> 00:03:38,885 but it's been at least two years        since it happened.        72 00:03:38,952 --> 00:03:42,789   - But it sounds like you got       walloped with some pretty         intense news yesterday.     73 00:03:42,855 --> 00:03:45,124    Not getting the ED job and       then this thing with Mags.    74 00:03:45,191 --> 00:03:47,227      - That's why she didn't         tell me because she knew     75 00:03:47,293 --> 00:03:49,929  I'd find a way to wear it. And    why she ended things with me.  76 00:03:49,996 --> 00:03:53,233 What's the point of the work we  do if this is still where I am?  77 00:03:53,299 --> 00:03:56,302  - I have a patient in my office who might not want to hear that. 78 00:03:56,369 --> 00:03:58,371      - Look, I didn't mean             to offend you, I--         79 00:03:58,438 --> 00:04:00,673   - You don't want this to be         happening, but it is.       80 00:04:00,740 --> 00:04:02,375    So focus on the practical.    81 00:04:02,442 --> 00:04:04,644   Make sure nothing got missed      with any of your patients,    82 00:04:04,711 --> 00:04:07,814       and tell your chief          that you need the afternoon       off for personal reasons.     83 00:04:07,880 --> 00:04:09,315  - You make it sound so simple.  84 00:04:09,382 --> 00:04:12,051   - If you want to talk more,        I can see you at 4 P.M.      85 00:04:14,120 --> 00:04:15,688      - The cath went well.       86 00:04:15,755 --> 00:04:17,523        No abnormalities               we weren't expecting.       87 00:04:17,590 --> 00:04:19,259        Pulmonary pressure                 was also fine.          88 00:04:19,325 --> 00:04:21,027     - How do you feel, Mags?     89 00:04:21,094 --> 00:04:24,530     - Um... You said "fine",         does that mean not good?     90 00:04:24,597 --> 00:04:26,132        - I get the impetus               to be the doctor,        91 00:04:26,199 --> 00:04:28,901  but today, that's my job. We'll make sure everything's in range. 92 00:04:28,968 --> 00:04:31,771        - Okay. But are you               saying it isn't?         93 00:04:31,838 --> 00:04:33,473 Because you both seem kind of--  94 00:04:33,539 --> 00:04:36,376     - There was a small flag            in your bloodwork.        95 00:04:36,442 --> 00:04:38,645       White cells at 13.             - Are you worried about      96 00:04:38,711 --> 00:04:39,779    infection or inflammation?    97 00:04:39,846 --> 00:04:42,315       That's not me trying                to be a doctor.         98 00:04:42,382 --> 00:04:44,083     That's just me being me.     99 00:04:44,150 --> 00:04:47,020   Will you start antibiotics?                - Yes.               100 00:04:47,086 --> 00:04:49,122      There's plenty of time             for you to respond.       101 00:04:49,188 --> 00:04:50,890   The donor heart hasn't even          been retrieved yet.        102 00:04:50,957 --> 00:04:52,759      - Assuming your count            is in range by then,        103 00:04:52,825 --> 00:04:54,894      we could be operating          as early as this evening.     104 00:04:54,961 --> 00:04:57,864  My team will need around seven      hours for the transplant.    105 00:04:57,930 --> 00:05:00,166      After that, you'll be             in CICU a few days.        106 00:05:00,233 --> 00:05:02,835 Then the ward for about a week.  107 00:05:02,902 --> 00:05:05,071        Save your strength,                 Dr. Leblanc.           108 00:05:05,138 --> 00:05:06,773        We'll speak soon.         109 00:05:06,839 --> 00:05:09,108         - Doesn't seem                to like me very much.       110 00:05:09,175 --> 00:05:11,311  - Mags, Andrew's the top guy.   111 00:05:11,377 --> 00:05:14,580  What he reserves in emotional   labour, he spends on the table.  112 00:05:14,647 --> 00:05:16,249         He's the one you                 want doing this.         113 00:05:16,316 --> 00:05:18,117   - Will the backup recipient          still be an option?        114 00:05:18,184 --> 00:05:19,752         If I'm ruled out                  from infection,         115 00:05:19,819 --> 00:05:22,422  will the heart still be of use? - Don't worry about any of that. 116 00:05:22,488 --> 00:05:25,758    I'll admit, I'm surprised          you said yes to this        117 00:05:25,825 --> 00:05:27,927 considering we weren't expecting         a match so soon.         118 00:05:27,994 --> 00:05:30,196 And when you found out you made    the list, you were unsure.     119 00:05:30,263 --> 00:05:33,700     - Am I allowed to ask how      the retrieval process works?   120 00:05:33,766 --> 00:05:35,001           - The donor's                in another hospital.       121 00:05:35,068 --> 00:05:36,669     When the family's ready,     122 00:05:36,736 --> 00:05:38,004  they'll withdraw life support.  123 00:05:38,071 --> 00:05:40,006        Retrieval doctor               will bring the heart,       124 00:05:40,073 --> 00:05:41,941           Andrew's team               will have you prepped.      125 00:05:42,008 --> 00:05:43,643  - How do people even do that?   126 00:05:43,710 --> 00:05:45,812  You know, just, wait without--  127 00:05:45,878 --> 00:05:47,680    - Driving themselves nuts.                 - Yeah.             128 00:05:47,747 --> 00:05:49,916  - It's mostly practical stuff.         Many of my patients       129 00:05:49,982 --> 00:05:52,085   aren't able to be as active       as you are at this stage,     130 00:05:52,151 --> 00:05:54,020    so they're already set up          for a long recovery.        131 00:05:54,087 --> 00:05:56,756  So maybe contact your family.   132 00:05:56,823 --> 00:05:58,257        Confirm care plans.       133 00:06:00,893 --> 00:06:03,162    - Cellulitis is on fluids            and antibiotics.          134 00:06:03,229 --> 00:06:05,298  Hip fracture is waiting on OR.  135 00:06:05,365 --> 00:06:07,233  And Dr. Thibeault hasn't come         back from imaging.         136 00:06:07,300 --> 00:06:09,869      - Okay, and Doctor...                - Thibeault.            137 00:06:09,936 --> 00:06:11,771        - Is he one of the                 new residents?          138 00:06:11,838 --> 00:06:15,041    - The thoracics guy from      upstairs? He's on call tonight,  139 00:06:15,108 --> 00:06:17,210 but came in with this suspected        gallbladder attack.        140 00:06:17,276 --> 00:06:19,078 You ordered a formal ultrasound.              - Yes!              141 00:06:19,145 --> 00:06:21,114   Yes, uh... Ultrasound. Um...   142 00:06:21,180 --> 00:06:25,151  And the lady with the tumour,        has oncology been in?       143 00:06:25,218 --> 00:06:29,055       Tanya, she was in E.              - She has a tumor?        144 00:06:29,822 --> 00:06:32,925    Holy crap. She came in with    a headache she couldn't shake,  145 00:06:32,992 --> 00:06:36,262   thinking she'd drunk herself       into oblivion. Her words.    146 00:06:36,329 --> 00:06:38,798   What made you order an MRI?       - Uh, just a lucky hunch.     147 00:06:38,865 --> 00:06:41,401      - Well, good on you.             I'll handle oncology.       148 00:06:41,467 --> 00:06:44,203   - Okay, and, uh, after that,         we're all caught up,       149 00:06:44,270 --> 00:06:46,105  there's nothing else pending?               - Nope.              150 00:06:46,172 --> 00:06:48,141       Is there something            you're worried we missed?     151 00:06:48,207 --> 00:06:50,243              - No.                           - Okay.              152 00:06:51,544 --> 00:06:52,912              (sigh)              153 00:06:52,979 --> 00:06:55,148         (phone ringing)          154 00:07:01,921 --> 00:07:03,556             - Hey.                          - Bashir.             155 00:07:03,623 --> 00:07:05,792           (in Arabic)            156 00:07:19,705 --> 00:07:23,776      - Well, don't keep us                in suspense.            157 00:07:28,915 --> 00:07:30,850             - Uh...              158 00:07:32,118 --> 00:07:34,821      No, nothing like that.      159 00:07:51,437 --> 00:07:58,177   - I, I guess I was just, um,        thinking about things.      160 00:08:04,150 --> 00:08:06,252          - Yeah, yeah.                Of course, of course.       161 00:08:06,319 --> 00:08:09,956             Um, yeah.                      Okay, salam.           162 00:08:10,022 --> 00:08:11,824          - Yeah, salam.          163 00:08:14,260 --> 00:08:16,829          (gentle music)          164 00:08:21,133 --> 00:08:23,035           - Dr. Novak,                 this is June Curtis,       165 00:08:23,102 --> 00:08:24,871    obviously, you know that.     166 00:08:24,937 --> 00:08:26,472   Were you screening my calls?   167 00:08:26,539 --> 00:08:27,974        Because that would                 be a dick move.         168 00:08:28,040 --> 00:08:29,442   Look, I just wanted to know    169 00:08:29,509 --> 00:08:31,744   if you're non-presence today           was intentional.         170 00:08:31,811 --> 00:08:34,013          I know we had                some words yesterday,       171 00:08:34,080 --> 00:08:36,782 but that's not uncommon for us.  But then you made that comment   172 00:08:36,849 --> 00:08:40,920  about me putting my stability     on you which isn't even...     173 00:08:40,987 --> 00:08:43,956      Can you please call me             when you get this?        174 00:08:44,023 --> 00:08:45,558            Thank you.            175 00:08:46,759 --> 00:08:48,961           - Hi, June.                         - Hi!               176 00:08:49,028 --> 00:08:51,564  - Thank you so much for this.         - Yeah, of course.         177 00:08:51,631 --> 00:08:54,934           - Yeah, hi.                         - Hi.               178 00:08:55,768 --> 00:08:59,405    - She said something about          having to get her...       179 00:08:59,472 --> 00:09:02,375  white blood cell count down,     do you think that's very bad?   180 00:09:02,441 --> 00:09:04,443      - Uh, not necessarily.        You know, when they're doing   181 00:09:04,510 --> 00:09:07,213 a heart transplant, sometimes--     - This is all she wanted?     182 00:09:07,280 --> 00:09:08,848         - I... think so.         183 00:09:08,915 --> 00:09:10,917         Uh, everything               from her bedroom floor.      184 00:09:10,983 --> 00:09:12,818             - Yeah.               - Exactly what she requested,   185 00:09:12,885 --> 00:09:15,388             I think.                I'll help you bring it up.    186 00:09:15,454 --> 00:09:18,190          - I'll be fine.              You're busy. I'm sure.      187 00:09:18,257 --> 00:09:20,726 - Yeah, if there's anything else      you need from the house     188 00:09:20,793 --> 00:09:23,129   or anything at all, then I--   - Well, her sister's coming too, 189 00:09:23,195 --> 00:09:25,464          so you can get                 back to your life.        190 00:09:26,265 --> 00:09:28,234             - Yeah.              191 00:09:30,703 --> 00:09:32,138               Oh.                192 00:09:34,907 --> 00:09:36,442             (gasps)              193 00:09:38,344 --> 00:09:39,579             - June?              194 00:09:40,813 --> 00:09:43,215       - Yeah, uh, it's...             - Is something wrong?       195 00:09:43,282 --> 00:09:44,984        - Oh, it's nothing.       196 00:09:45,051 --> 00:09:46,719        - Oh, it's all just               a lot, isn't it?         197 00:09:46,786 --> 00:09:48,020        If you're anything                like my daughter,        198 00:09:48,087 --> 00:09:49,388         I know how much                 she carries so...         199 00:09:49,455 --> 00:09:51,357       - No, it's not that.          I'm taking hormone therapy    200 00:09:51,424 --> 00:09:53,426     to stimulate ovulation,          and when that happens,       201 00:09:53,492 --> 00:09:56,529    I get this annoying pain.       - You're trying for a baby?    202 00:09:56,596 --> 00:09:58,364       - Thinking about it.       203 00:09:58,431 --> 00:09:59,966  I don't know if I can, but...   204 00:10:00,032 --> 00:10:01,867    - June, that's wonderful.     205 00:10:02,535 --> 00:10:04,670 It's the hardest and best thing          you'll ever do,          206 00:10:04,737 --> 00:10:06,339    loving someone that much.     207 00:10:08,007 --> 00:10:10,009            - Um, I...            208 00:10:10,810 --> 00:10:12,378     I'm feeling better now.      209 00:10:12,445 --> 00:10:15,214   - I should get back to Mags.              Thank you.            210 00:10:15,848 --> 00:10:17,650               - Oh.                  - Please don't touch me!     211 00:10:17,717 --> 00:10:20,186          - Is that Owen?             - Please don't touch me.     212 00:10:20,252 --> 00:10:22,421       - Every time we try           the BP cuff, he loses it.     213 00:10:22,488 --> 00:10:24,457   It's like it's hurting him.     - Well, that's because it is.   214 00:10:24,523 --> 00:10:27,727         Hey, Owen, Owen.            I'm Theo. You okay, buddy?    215 00:10:27,793 --> 00:10:30,563       About two years ago,           his family came in after            a boating accident.       216 00:10:30,630 --> 00:10:32,365  I'm going to get this blanket          off of you, okay?         217 00:10:32,431 --> 00:10:34,100     - Theo, he's shivering--                 - I know.            218 00:10:35,101 --> 00:10:37,003        Do you remember me?       219 00:10:37,069 --> 00:10:39,238        No, that's okay,              because I remember you.      220 00:10:39,305 --> 00:10:42,441   Let's dim the lights, guys.     And no sound on the monitors.   221 00:10:42,508 --> 00:10:44,477         Owen has sensory               processing disorder,       222 00:10:44,543 --> 00:10:46,779      so no one touches him           without checking, okay?      223 00:10:46,846 --> 00:10:48,547        Tell me everything          that's bothering you, buddy.   224 00:10:48,614 --> 00:10:51,183         - Can't breathe.                    Leg hurts.            225 00:10:51,250 --> 00:10:54,253     And somebody's deodorant            is making me itchy.       226 00:10:54,320 --> 00:10:56,322       - Alright, let's deal         with those in order, okay?    227 00:10:56,389 --> 00:10:57,823        We need to get you                onto our gurney.         228 00:10:57,890 --> 00:10:59,825 It's going to suck. But it'll be     quick and you can scream     229 00:10:59,892 --> 00:11:02,728  as loud as you need to, okay?               - Okay.              230 00:11:02,795 --> 00:11:04,363        - Alright, let's                 move this closer.         231 00:11:04,430 --> 00:11:06,499      It'll be on my count.       232 00:11:06,565 --> 00:11:09,602         One, two, three.                    (screaming)           233 00:11:09,669 --> 00:11:12,004        Good job, good job!       234 00:11:12,071 --> 00:11:14,640    Okay, look, this next step            needs a monitor.         235 00:11:14,707 --> 00:11:16,842     We have to stick these          little pads to you, okay?     236 00:11:16,909 --> 00:11:19,412       - Can I do it myself?         - Yeah, of course you can.    237 00:11:19,478 --> 00:11:21,514    Alright, under your shirt,       on your right chest, okay?    238 00:11:21,580 --> 00:11:25,151    And this one on the left.       And this one on your belly.    239 00:11:25,651 --> 00:11:27,453     Alright, can you tell me              what happened?          240 00:11:27,520 --> 00:11:30,322     - I rode into some dirt,     flipped over my bike handlebars. 241 00:11:30,389 --> 00:11:32,725   - Were you wearing a helmet?             That's good.           242 00:11:32,792 --> 00:11:35,628      I need you to put this           on your chest and take           a breath for me, okay?      243 00:11:35,695 --> 00:11:38,898           (wheezing)                  Okay, then this side.       244 00:11:40,199 --> 00:11:42,468    Okay, I'll take that back.    245 00:11:42,535 --> 00:11:44,036            (coughing)            246 00:11:44,870 --> 00:11:47,406        - He's super tachy.               192 and climbing.        247 00:11:47,473 --> 00:11:50,142        - Alright, Claire,              set up a chest tube.            Prep 30mg of ketamine.      248 00:11:50,209 --> 00:11:51,944     - Without a BP? Theo...        - Owen, the reason it hurts    249 00:11:52,011 --> 00:11:54,714     to breathe is probably         a partially collapsed lung.    250 00:11:54,780 --> 00:11:56,882        I need to fix that.          I also need to do an X-ray    251 00:11:56,949 --> 00:11:58,951 of your leg for the bone doctor.       It's going to require      252 00:11:59,018 --> 00:12:00,352  a lot of feeling around, okay?  253 00:12:00,419 --> 00:12:02,555       So can we make a plan          to get you through this?     254 00:12:03,889 --> 00:12:05,658  - Last time you made me sleep,  255 00:12:05,725 --> 00:12:07,326       even though I didn't                 want you to.           256 00:12:07,393 --> 00:12:10,262           - Yes, I did.              - Can you do that again?     257 00:12:10,329 --> 00:12:12,364    I think I rather be numb.     258 00:12:15,367 --> 00:12:18,304           - Yeah, um,                while Claire does that,      259 00:12:18,370 --> 00:12:21,006    the third thing you said is     that you were feeling itchy.   260 00:12:21,073 --> 00:12:23,075          - Forget that.                 I think it's okay.        261 00:12:23,142 --> 00:12:25,377         - Are you sure?           Because I'm here to help you.   262 00:12:25,444 --> 00:12:27,446      - I can't go anywhere.             I have no freedom.        263 00:12:27,513 --> 00:12:29,949     - Um, you know, not on        your bike for a little while,   264 00:12:30,015 --> 00:12:31,884    but when your leg heals...           - It's not enough.        265 00:12:31,951 --> 00:12:34,820 My mom's always busy. My friends        do stuff without me       266 00:12:34,887 --> 00:12:36,689  because... the subway's loud!   267 00:12:36,756 --> 00:12:39,258    I want my driver's licence              when I'm 16.           268 00:12:39,325 --> 00:12:41,026  - Well, okay, look, if you're        looking for a lesson,       269 00:12:41,093 --> 00:12:42,461         now might not be                the best time, pal.       270 00:12:42,528 --> 00:12:44,029           - A letter.            271 00:12:44,096 --> 00:12:45,531       Because of how I am.       272 00:12:45,598 --> 00:12:48,000         I need a doctor                 to say it's safe.         273 00:12:49,568 --> 00:12:52,271    Alright, let's get through            this first, okay?        274 00:13:03,115 --> 00:13:05,251              - Hi.                            - Hi.               275 00:13:05,317 --> 00:13:09,421        Um, Ms... Leblanc.        276 00:13:09,488 --> 00:13:10,990        Um, I'm Dr. Hamed.        277 00:13:11,056 --> 00:13:13,759       I'm here to give you               a status update,         278 00:13:13,826 --> 00:13:15,795 but I... don't know what it is.  279 00:13:15,861 --> 00:13:17,830  - I know I should've told you.  280 00:13:17,897 --> 00:13:20,166        It's just all been                so fast and weird        281 00:13:20,232 --> 00:13:21,834          with mushy odds                in every direction        282 00:13:21,901 --> 00:13:23,435           about whether                 it's worth the risk       283 00:13:23,502 --> 00:13:24,904      or if a heart was ever               going to come--         284 00:13:24,970 --> 00:13:27,072             - Mags.                    - I haven't even...             been sure how I feel.       285 00:13:27,139 --> 00:13:29,942    I mean, I'm barely letting         myself think about it.      286 00:13:30,009 --> 00:13:31,243       - It's okay. Really.       287 00:13:31,310 --> 00:13:34,013          I understand                why you didn't tell me.      288 00:13:34,079 --> 00:13:36,115      But I want to be here                 for you now            289 00:13:36,182 --> 00:13:38,651          in whatever way                you need me to be.        290 00:13:40,553 --> 00:13:42,087           - Thank you.           291 00:13:42,154 --> 00:13:43,656              (sigh)              292 00:13:47,693 --> 00:13:49,795      All of this is like...      293 00:13:50,496 --> 00:13:53,866 It's like it's happening to me.  294 00:13:55,000 --> 00:13:56,602        It's almost like...       295 00:13:56,669 --> 00:13:59,805      - Like you don't know              how you got here?         296 00:13:59,872 --> 00:14:01,373             - Yeah.              297 00:14:02,641 --> 00:14:04,743      And I'm trying to find             a way to tell Devi        298 00:14:04,810 --> 00:14:07,146  because she doesn't know that    I'll need at least six months   299 00:14:07,213 --> 00:14:08,480  to recover from major surgery.  300 00:14:08,547 --> 00:14:11,150      And who knows how many             concessions after.        301 00:14:14,753 --> 00:14:16,288          I don't know.           302 00:14:16,355 --> 00:14:18,557     Maybe I should just fall          on my sword and resign.     303 00:14:18,624 --> 00:14:20,759             - Don't.                 Don't volunteer to quit.     304 00:14:20,826 --> 00:14:22,995 - What else am I supposed to do?     Devi put her trust in me     305 00:14:23,062 --> 00:14:26,398       and I betrayed her             by not telling her that            this was happening.        306 00:14:27,333 --> 00:14:29,668          I think because                I couldn't face it.       307 00:14:29,735 --> 00:14:31,270          Or I wouldn't.          308 00:14:33,405 --> 00:14:36,041         - Hey, you could                 let me tell her.         309 00:14:36,675 --> 00:14:38,544      - Bash, it's not fair              to put that on--          310 00:14:38,611 --> 00:14:40,779   - I want to be here for you,         Mags. And I need to--      311 00:14:40,846 --> 00:14:42,348            - Bash...                  - Look, will you just       312 00:14:42,414 --> 00:14:43,949     let me do this for you?      313 00:14:44,016 --> 00:14:47,253           I'll run down              the medical facts to her     314 00:14:47,319 --> 00:14:49,688      and give her the space                 to respond.           315 00:14:51,957 --> 00:14:53,792          It'll be okay.          316 00:14:58,330 --> 00:15:01,800  (indistinct P.A. announcement)  317 00:15:06,171 --> 00:15:08,841 - Is this about ICU bed spacing?             - Uh, no.            318 00:15:08,908 --> 00:15:11,510      No, they cleared some.         I was looking at my shifts             for next week.          319 00:15:11,577 --> 00:15:13,846   And I remembered you asked       if I ever felt overloaded--    320 00:15:13,913 --> 00:15:17,182          - Holy Hell.                 - Is something wrong?       321 00:15:17,249 --> 00:15:20,252    - Uh... I was accidentally          copied on this email       322 00:15:20,319 --> 00:15:23,889    from our CMO at the board        saying that I have failed     323 00:15:23,956 --> 00:15:27,793    to address this situation        about this resident being        mistreated in Trauma OR.      324 00:15:27,860 --> 00:15:30,829      He didn't mean for me            to read this, right?        325 00:15:30,896 --> 00:15:34,099      - "One of us will have             to talk to Neeta."        326 00:15:34,166 --> 00:15:36,835       Was that about Novak             yelling at some kid?       327 00:15:36,902 --> 00:15:39,505  - And the man who didn't even     want me knowing about this     328 00:15:39,571 --> 00:15:41,941         is now blaming me           for the actions of the man    329 00:15:42,007 --> 00:15:44,209 who did this in the first place. 330 00:15:44,276 --> 00:15:47,112  Anyway. Um, what did you need?  331 00:15:47,179 --> 00:15:50,115  - Nothing. I'll figure it out.              - Thanks.            332 00:15:53,452 --> 00:15:56,689  - Dr. Thibeault, I understand      you are trying to make--      333 00:15:56,755 --> 00:15:58,924    - What's your ED passcode?         The system won't let me     334 00:15:58,991 --> 00:16:01,060       look at my imaging              and the tech wouldn't              tell me anything,         335 00:16:01,126 --> 00:16:02,494     even though he knows me.     336 00:16:02,561 --> 00:16:04,496       - It's against their             policy to diagnose--       337 00:16:04,563 --> 00:16:05,931      - Yeah, I already know            that it's gallstones.      338 00:16:05,998 --> 00:16:07,366        I just want to see                the extent of it.        339 00:16:07,433 --> 00:16:09,401       - There's actually            no evidence of gallstones     340 00:16:09,468 --> 00:16:11,937      or gallbladder injury        according to your ultrasound.   341 00:16:12,004 --> 00:16:13,806            - Show me.            342 00:16:15,741 --> 00:16:17,843             (groans)                    It makes no sense.        343 00:16:17,910 --> 00:16:19,578 This is a classic presentation.  344 00:16:19,645 --> 00:16:22,781     Acute pain that radiates         to the right after heavy            or high-fat foods.        345 00:16:22,848 --> 00:16:25,918    Pain between the shoulder        blades, nausea. Hold on.      346 00:16:25,985 --> 00:16:27,619        - Are you working              a lot of late shifts?       347 00:16:27,686 --> 00:16:30,522   You know, lack of sleep and     stress can affect gut health?   348 00:16:30,589 --> 00:16:32,825      - Let me just stop you             right there, okay?        349 00:16:32,891 --> 00:16:35,527   I've used the whole "what's     going on in your life" speech   350 00:16:35,594 --> 00:16:38,664    to patients who just want     to be reassured nothing's wrong         my whole career.          351 00:16:38,731 --> 00:16:40,933  Stressed, depressed, anxious?   352 00:16:41,000 --> 00:16:44,937     Sleep better. Eat better.     Hydrate. No, this is not that.  353 00:16:45,004 --> 00:16:48,607        It's more intense                 localized pain.          354 00:16:48,674 --> 00:16:50,876       - Look, as a doctor,       355 00:16:50,943 --> 00:16:53,479     I understand the impulse             to self-diagnose,        356 00:16:53,545 --> 00:16:56,081 but there is several documented    cases of stress and anxiety    357 00:16:56,148 --> 00:16:57,716        causing 10 out of--                    - Bud!              358 00:16:57,783 --> 00:17:00,119    I'm not here for therapy.           This isn't mental.         359 00:17:00,185 --> 00:17:02,654  - I will ask your radiologist       to review your report.       360 00:17:02,721 --> 00:17:04,490    - That's not good enough.             I want a HIDA.           361 00:17:04,556 --> 00:17:05,624    Do you know what that is?     362 00:17:05,691 --> 00:17:07,693          - Hepatobiliary             iminodiacetic acid scan?     363 00:17:07,760 --> 00:17:10,329    Yes, I know what that is.            I will refer you.         364 00:17:10,396 --> 00:17:13,098   It takes a couple of weeks.          - I want one today.        365 00:17:13,165 --> 00:17:15,401 - I'm not sure that's possible.       Radiology is at fu--        366 00:17:15,467 --> 00:17:17,469    - Well then, bump someone!      Okay, I'm on tonight anyway.   367 00:17:17,536 --> 00:17:19,004        I'll make the time.              - Dr. Thibeault...        368 00:17:19,071 --> 00:17:20,472   - You're a resident, right?    369 00:17:20,539 --> 00:17:21,774  - For a few more months, yes.   370 00:17:21,840 --> 00:17:23,275         - Yeah, I'm not.                So I'm telling you        371 00:17:23,342 --> 00:17:25,677          to do your job.               Get me on that list.       372 00:17:30,015 --> 00:17:31,450            (sighing)             373 00:17:32,317 --> 00:17:35,954  - I see you're still not quite    a fan of folding your things.  374 00:17:36,021 --> 00:17:38,791 - My bedroom clutter hasn't been     your problem in 15 years.    375 00:17:38,857 --> 00:17:40,793       Let's not regress.         - It's just if you want to feel  376 00:17:40,859 --> 00:17:42,127         presentable when                you have visitors.        377 00:17:42,194 --> 00:17:44,363   I don't know, maybe somebody           here has an iron.        378 00:17:44,430 --> 00:17:46,198  - Don't do that, please, Mom.   379 00:17:47,499 --> 00:17:50,536      Thank you for coming          to town so quickly, though.    380 00:17:50,602 --> 00:17:52,237           (in French)            381 00:17:52,304 --> 00:17:56,275       - Mom... Am I making           the right decision here?     382 00:17:56,341 --> 00:18:01,280  - Well, um, both your doctors   agree there is no other choice.  383 00:18:01,346 --> 00:18:03,715    And your surgeon mentioned            you were nervous         384 00:18:03,782 --> 00:18:05,250   and that it's normal to be,    385 00:18:05,317 --> 00:18:06,852        but he's done this               many times before.        386 00:18:06,919 --> 00:18:08,754          - They do have               to say that, you know?      387 00:18:08,821 --> 00:18:10,456         (clears throat)          388 00:18:11,056 --> 00:18:13,158     I wanted to ask if maybe         I could come to Montreal     389 00:18:13,225 --> 00:18:15,194          for a few weeks                once I'm out but--        390 00:18:15,260 --> 00:18:17,096        - Doesn't make any                 sense, does it?         391 00:18:17,162 --> 00:18:20,099 No, you need to be close to the    hospital and your doctors.     392 00:18:20,165 --> 00:18:22,401   I was sure you of all people          would have a whole        393 00:18:22,468 --> 00:18:24,636      flow chart mapped out              on the logistics.         394 00:18:24,703 --> 00:18:27,372         - Well, I don't.                So now I'm thinking       395 00:18:27,439 --> 00:18:29,975      that maybe you can come       to June's for a week or two.   396 00:18:30,042 --> 00:18:32,144         And then I'd get                a nurse, obviously.       397 00:18:32,211 --> 00:18:34,346     - Magalie, your father,        sister and I found a rental    398 00:18:34,413 --> 00:18:36,048 near the hospital, two bedrooms. 399 00:18:36,115 --> 00:18:38,350     We will trade on and off          all year if we need to.     400 00:18:38,417 --> 00:18:40,853     - I don't want you guys          disrupting your lives.       401 00:18:40,919 --> 00:18:43,122         - Don't be silly.               We're your family.        402 00:18:43,188 --> 00:18:45,724  I'll tell your father to speak        to the broker today.       403 00:18:46,725 --> 00:18:50,229  - There is an 80% success rate    in the first year, you know?   404 00:18:50,295 --> 00:18:53,232  That means starting the clock,      from tonight's operation,    405 00:18:53,298 --> 00:18:57,302 if they clear me for it, I have  a one-in-five chance of dying.   406 00:18:57,369 --> 00:18:59,037           (in French)            407 00:18:59,104 --> 00:19:02,074     - Yeah, I just... I need     to make sure that you understand 408 00:19:02,141 --> 00:19:03,475   what's happening here, Mom.    409 00:19:03,542 --> 00:19:05,711     - That is not a thought        any of us need in our heads    410 00:19:05,777 --> 00:19:07,279  right now, especially not you.  411 00:19:09,014 --> 00:19:11,283           (in French)            412 00:19:16,288 --> 00:19:18,090       - I asked to be here               when you woke up.        413 00:19:18,157 --> 00:19:20,692        Guess that message                wasn't received.         414 00:19:20,759 --> 00:19:23,795   Uh, but the traction is only         going to be 24 hours.      415 00:19:23,862 --> 00:19:25,564             - I know.                - Must be uncomfortable.     416 00:19:25,631 --> 00:19:27,466      Have to lie still with           all this stuff on you.      417 00:19:27,533 --> 00:19:30,002    But the bone doctors agree          to let you stay here,      418 00:19:30,068 --> 00:19:32,137        so I could get you              everything you need.       419 00:19:32,204 --> 00:19:33,839             - Thanks!                       (chuckles)            420 00:19:35,073 --> 00:19:37,376   - Owen, you said you flipped         over your handlebars.      421 00:19:38,143 --> 00:19:42,114   But the way your leg broke      made it look like you jumped.   422 00:19:42,181 --> 00:19:45,117         Now, what you...               talked about earlier       423 00:19:45,184 --> 00:19:48,420   about you having no freedom.   If you want to talk to someone-- 424 00:19:48,487 --> 00:19:51,957  - I found the good kind, bud.           - Thanks, Mac.           425 00:19:52,724 --> 00:19:54,760          - Dr. Hunter,               let's chat in the hall.      426 00:19:56,862 --> 00:20:01,166     You wanted him to talk           to somebody about what?      427 00:20:01,233 --> 00:20:04,403           - I'm sorry.                  Are you... family?        428 00:20:04,469 --> 00:20:07,706  - Mac Hinkley. I'm Owen's GP.      He asked me to come down.     429 00:20:07,773 --> 00:20:10,175     - Instead of his mother?       - Well, that's between them.   430 00:20:10,242 --> 00:20:13,245    But their relationship is,               uh, tough.            431 00:20:13,312 --> 00:20:15,814           - I remember.           - What you don't know about is  432 00:20:15,881 --> 00:20:18,183           his mass cell                activation syndrome.       433 00:20:18,250 --> 00:20:20,485         - Owen has MCAS?                    Since when?           434 00:20:20,552 --> 00:20:22,054    - Was diagnosed last year.    435 00:20:22,120 --> 00:20:25,524  I think maybe it factored into     the SPD, or accentuated it.   436 00:20:25,591 --> 00:20:29,294   There is so much they don't        know about it, though.       437 00:20:29,361 --> 00:20:32,664   - Would that explain today?           The racing heart?         438 00:20:32,731 --> 00:20:37,302 - Probably. MCAS means "severe,     unpredictable reactions".     439 00:20:37,369 --> 00:20:39,805    Cardiac, autoimmune, GI...    440 00:20:39,871 --> 00:20:42,341         to stimuli that's              constantly evolving.       441 00:20:42,407 --> 00:20:44,876 - He was afraid of being itchy   because of someone's deodorant,  442 00:20:44,943 --> 00:20:46,712      but then he just said                it was okay.            443 00:20:46,778 --> 00:20:50,015     - It's a new environment.     He never knows when he's safe.  444 00:20:50,082 --> 00:20:54,286     Which is why we're going        to limit the people coming         in and out of his room.     445 00:20:54,353 --> 00:20:56,722      - Because he lives in a        constant fear of triggers.    446 00:20:56,788 --> 00:20:58,624       - Are you asking him              to talk to a psych?       447 00:20:58,690 --> 00:21:01,493     - Well, Owen said that       he flipped over his handlebars,  448 00:21:01,560 --> 00:21:03,829         but his femur's                 fracture pattern,         449 00:21:03,895 --> 00:21:06,698    it... well, it said to me             that he jumped.          450 00:21:06,765 --> 00:21:09,001    - You never horsed around         when you were his age?       451 00:21:09,067 --> 00:21:12,771             (sighing)               Owen has challenges, sure.    452 00:21:12,838 --> 00:21:15,540       But he's still a kid               which means doing        453 00:21:15,607 --> 00:21:17,809     the same stupid things        and not wanting to cop to it.   454 00:21:17,876 --> 00:21:20,445    - Right, but what if that           isn't what happened        455 00:21:20,512 --> 00:21:23,415 and he intended to hurt himself?      - He wouldn't do that.      456 00:21:23,482 --> 00:21:27,819      You know, we started           a desensitization program          to help with the SPD.       457 00:21:27,886 --> 00:21:32,891      We're making progress.      - Um, does he have a specialist? 458 00:21:32,958 --> 00:21:34,860     Because I could give you              some referrals.         459 00:21:34,926 --> 00:21:36,662      - He's got an endless                list of them.           460 00:21:36,728 --> 00:21:40,666  But the only one who actually        knows the kid is me.        461 00:21:40,732 --> 00:21:43,902      If Owen wanted to hurt            himself, I'd know it.      462 00:21:43,969 --> 00:21:47,172           - He asked me               to help him make a plan        to get a driver's licence.    463 00:21:47,239 --> 00:21:49,274     - And you think because            I said no to that,         464 00:21:49,341 --> 00:21:51,376  he threw himself off a cliff?!  465 00:21:51,443 --> 00:21:54,246     I get he wants to drive             when he's of age.         466 00:21:54,313 --> 00:21:57,115    But he knows that it might            not be realistic.        467 00:21:57,182 --> 00:21:58,884       - And I'm not saying               he wants to die.         468 00:21:58,950 --> 00:22:00,719        Okay, bad feelings                can be fleeting,         469 00:22:00,786 --> 00:22:03,088   but there was a desperation              in the ask.            470 00:22:03,155 --> 00:22:05,057      Like he feels trapped.      471 00:22:05,123 --> 00:22:07,626   - You're wrong, Dr. Hunter.             You're wrong.           472 00:22:07,693 --> 00:22:10,862  And I don't want you bringing       this up with him again.      473 00:22:16,401 --> 00:22:18,403        - The good news is               it looks operable.        474 00:22:18,470 --> 00:22:22,240      And our surgeon said            that she has an opening         tonight for a craniotomy.     475 00:22:22,307 --> 00:22:25,110     - Tonight? Does it have            to happen so fast?         476 00:22:25,177 --> 00:22:27,879      - When they make time                 so quickly,            477 00:22:27,946 --> 00:22:29,514    waiting is not advisable.     478 00:22:29,581 --> 00:22:31,550             - Okay.                         (ripping)             479 00:22:35,454 --> 00:22:38,156      When my son was born,             something changed.         480 00:22:38,223 --> 00:22:42,094         I was, um, sad.                   All the time.           481 00:22:42,160 --> 00:22:47,966        I started drinking            to self-medicate, and...          the headaches started.      482 00:22:48,033 --> 00:22:50,502          My therapist                 called it depression.       483 00:22:50,569 --> 00:22:53,138         Another one said              "new mother syndrome".      484 00:22:53,205 --> 00:22:55,307     And my friends called it                "Wine Mom".           485 00:22:55,374 --> 00:22:59,911  Except, they were all wrong and it was only ever a brain tumour. 486 00:22:59,978 --> 00:23:03,815    So... all the work I did,         the endless counseling,      487 00:23:03,882 --> 00:23:06,485         the A.A. meetings               was just pointless?       488 00:23:06,551 --> 00:23:08,720     - It sounds like you did           everything you could       489 00:23:08,787 --> 00:23:10,455  with the information you had.   490 00:23:12,057 --> 00:23:14,326    (man): You call yourself a       mother, you selfish bitch!    491 00:23:14,393 --> 00:23:16,728        This is beyond...                I've had enough.          492 00:23:16,795 --> 00:23:19,197      I'm calling the police.        Never try seeing us again.    493 00:23:19,264 --> 00:23:21,767 - My ex came to pick up our son  494 00:23:21,833 --> 00:23:24,669    and he found me passed out              in the yard.           495 00:23:24,736 --> 00:23:27,672     My little boy had locked        himself up in the bathroom    496 00:23:27,739 --> 00:23:30,709 because he was terrified of me.  497 00:23:32,811 --> 00:23:35,313          I miss my son.          498 00:23:37,382 --> 00:23:41,553    - Hey. Tumours like this,           they affect memory,        499 00:23:41,620 --> 00:23:45,957   decision-making, personality.   This is not your fault, Tanya.  500 00:23:46,024 --> 00:23:48,326    - But the damage is done.     501 00:23:48,393 --> 00:23:53,231      I ruined my marriage             and scarred my child.       502 00:23:58,470 --> 00:24:01,807      - ...went out on a limb      with a specific plan that Mags          was essential to.        503 00:24:01,873 --> 00:24:04,009    And you're telling me that        she knew this was a risk?    504 00:24:04,075 --> 00:24:05,410         - Uh, Dr. Devi--         505 00:24:05,477 --> 00:24:07,012          - Obviously,                I'm concerned about her      506 00:24:07,078 --> 00:24:08,980           from a health                 perspective, but...       507 00:24:09,047 --> 00:24:12,184 How did you expect me to respond      to what you just said?      508 00:24:12,250 --> 00:24:15,620        - Um, which part of               what I just said?        509 00:24:15,687 --> 00:24:22,093   - Look, you and I both have     other things to do, I'm sure.   510 00:24:22,160 --> 00:24:24,296      Give my best to Mags.       511 00:24:24,362 --> 00:24:26,131      - I will but regarding              her job, I just--        512 00:24:26,198 --> 00:24:29,668     - I'm sorry, Dr. Hamed,       but that's gonna have to stay         between me and her.        513 00:24:36,875 --> 00:24:39,177            (giggling)            514 00:24:39,244 --> 00:24:41,246          (clear throat)                        - Oh.              515 00:24:41,313 --> 00:24:42,914              - Hi!                          - Sorry.              516 00:24:42,981 --> 00:24:46,685   We're busy, come back later.      - Oh. I'm so sorry, Doctor.   517 00:24:46,751 --> 00:24:48,753           Um, Doctor?                       - Curtis.             518 00:24:48,820 --> 00:24:50,522    - I'm Della. And this is--    519 00:24:50,589 --> 00:24:52,791        - Hartley. Hello.                 - Hi, Hartley.           520 00:24:52,858 --> 00:24:54,659        - I hear this is            a hernia-related emergency.    521 00:24:54,726 --> 00:24:57,596    - So Hartley developed one            about a year ago         522 00:24:57,662 --> 00:25:00,131        and he was supposed                to get it fixed         523 00:25:00,198 --> 00:25:03,268 at one of those private clinics.         - Trauma Hotels.         524 00:25:03,335 --> 00:25:05,604   - Okay, I take that to mean        it didn't happen. Why?       525 00:25:05,670 --> 00:25:08,406       - He has a phobia of               being put under.         526 00:25:08,473 --> 00:25:11,243       Have you heard of it?          - Tomophobia. Good word.     527 00:25:11,309 --> 00:25:13,345           Bad feeling.                - Which we figured out      528 00:25:13,411 --> 00:25:15,380           when he bit                 the anesthesiologist.       529 00:25:15,447 --> 00:25:16,781 - I bit three anesthesiologists. 530 00:25:16,848 --> 00:25:19,351    - No, it was one on three           separate occasions.        531 00:25:19,417 --> 00:25:21,119        - Okay... Is he...        532 00:25:21,186 --> 00:25:23,388      Are you feeling scared             right now, Hartley?       533 00:25:23,455 --> 00:25:27,592    - So here is where it gets          maybe a little weird.      534 00:25:27,659 --> 00:25:30,462       Um... So last night,            he was in so much pain      535 00:25:30,529 --> 00:25:32,063  and the thing started bulging   536 00:25:32,130 --> 00:25:34,766     which the internet said        could mean "incarceration"?    537 00:25:34,833 --> 00:25:38,570       - So she drugged me.         - She drugged you with what?   538 00:25:39,271 --> 00:25:40,939            - Ecstasy.                       - Ecstasy?            539 00:25:41,006 --> 00:25:43,208       - I know! But he was              resistant to coming       540 00:25:43,275 --> 00:25:46,144   and I knew that we needed to.   - She slipped it in my coffee.  541 00:25:46,211 --> 00:25:48,847  How lucky am I to have someone        like this in my life?      542 00:25:48,914 --> 00:25:50,916 - Okay, so you gave him ecstasy      without his knowledge?       543 00:25:50,982 --> 00:25:52,951   - No, he tolerates it fine.             We used to...           544 00:25:53,018 --> 00:25:55,220         - Hartley, hi!                  - ...be partyers.         545 00:25:55,287 --> 00:25:58,123     Pills usually lose their            potency over time.        546 00:25:58,189 --> 00:26:00,292     We had one laying around        the house for over a year.    547 00:26:00,358 --> 00:26:03,628    And so I figured it would         just mellow him enough.      548 00:26:03,695 --> 00:26:06,164 - You know this is gonna show up     on his urinalysis, right?    549 00:26:06,231 --> 00:26:07,999 - I didn't know what else to do. 550 00:26:08,066 --> 00:26:09,968  Okay, he was in so much pain,   551 00:26:10,035 --> 00:26:13,204  and every time he gets close,           he just can't.           552 00:26:13,271 --> 00:26:16,141    He's gonna be okay, right?        I mean, you can help me,                can't you?            553 00:26:16,207 --> 00:26:17,809        - If we're going                 to repair this...         554 00:26:17,876 --> 00:26:20,011      - If? No, you have to.      555 00:26:20,078 --> 00:26:21,780  What's your fear level at now?  556 00:26:21,846 --> 00:26:23,315        On a scale of one                 to... "bitey".           557 00:26:23,381 --> 00:26:25,817   - Doubt I'll ever be afraid         again thanks to you.        558 00:26:25,884 --> 00:26:27,819      - I'll be right back.       559 00:26:30,255 --> 00:26:32,557        So that guy needs            an emergency hernioplasty     560 00:26:32,624 --> 00:26:34,192   except he's high on ecstasy    561 00:26:34,259 --> 00:26:36,161 because his wife gave it to him      without his knowledge.       562 00:26:36,227 --> 00:26:37,796         I'm not sure of              the ethics of all this.      563 00:26:37,862 --> 00:26:38,964     - It's actually a crime,     564 00:26:39,030 --> 00:26:40,565        so if he wants us              to call the police...       565 00:26:40,632 --> 00:26:42,434           - Pretty sure              he thinks it's romantic.     566 00:26:42,500 --> 00:26:44,669   - I heard Novak's gone AWOL.                - Yeah.             567 00:26:44,736 --> 00:26:46,471   - I think we should use this              as a reason           568 00:26:46,538 --> 00:26:48,373  to move him out of Trauma OR.   569 00:26:49,307 --> 00:26:51,209       - Like, permanently?       570 00:26:52,711 --> 00:26:54,379        Is it even possible              for him to be AWOL?       571 00:26:54,446 --> 00:26:55,780     Technically, he answers                to himself.            572 00:26:55,847 --> 00:26:57,148      - Which is a problem!       573 00:26:57,215 --> 00:26:59,217     He has no accountability           and he's unreliable.       574 00:26:59,284 --> 00:27:03,188    - He's like unpredictable.          - He is toxic chaos.       575 00:27:03,254 --> 00:27:04,789      And I have a job to do             in this department.       576 00:27:04,856 --> 00:27:07,859   - Well, if this about making         an example of him...       577 00:27:07,926 --> 00:27:09,361       - He has dug himself                 into a hole,           578 00:27:09,427 --> 00:27:11,262  and I can't for the life of me           understand you          579 00:27:11,329 --> 00:27:13,932     and why you defend him.        - I get it, okay. I get it.    580 00:27:13,999 --> 00:27:15,934    He's got blind spots, yes.           But him and I built       581 00:27:16,001 --> 00:27:18,169        something together           in Trauma OR and I just...    582 00:27:18,236 --> 00:27:21,006        I don't feel right                 blowing it up.          583 00:27:21,506 --> 00:27:23,408      - Outstanding patients              in the last hour?        584 00:27:23,475 --> 00:27:26,211 - Um, no, I gave the tumor lady        a surgical update,         585 00:27:26,277 --> 00:27:28,113        but I think I got                distracted after.         586 00:27:28,179 --> 00:27:30,915  - Wait, was that why she left?            - Tanya left?          587 00:27:30,982 --> 00:27:32,217        - You didn't know?        588 00:27:32,283 --> 00:27:34,486     They wanted her upstairs             for pre-op stuff,        589 00:27:34,552 --> 00:27:36,287          but she told me                you told her to go.       590 00:27:36,354 --> 00:27:39,124   - No, I would never have...          Is she coming back?        591 00:27:39,190 --> 00:27:42,427  - Should I tell OR to cancel?            - No, no, no.           592 00:27:42,494 --> 00:27:44,829 Call her first. Try every number         we have for her.         593 00:27:44,896 --> 00:27:47,198      - Bash. Did something           happen between you two?      594 00:27:47,265 --> 00:27:48,633     - No, nothing happened.      595 00:27:48,700 --> 00:27:50,001          Just grab me                 if you get her, okay?       596 00:27:50,068 --> 00:27:51,536             - Okay.                         - Thanks.             597 00:27:51,603 --> 00:27:53,538      - Well, the only other              actionable thing              in the last hour was--      598 00:27:53,605 --> 00:27:55,407    - Bashir, we need to talk       about Dr. Ruston Thibeault.    599 00:27:55,473 --> 00:27:57,142          - Yeah, that.            - You booked an urgent consul   600 00:27:57,208 --> 00:27:58,910          to my office,               but Rusty was expecting      601 00:27:58,977 --> 00:28:00,345     a HIDA scan, not psych.      602 00:28:00,412 --> 00:28:02,247      And he was very upset              when I showed up.         603 00:28:02,313 --> 00:28:04,482  I made space. You already knew      I was wall-to-wall today.    604 00:28:04,549 --> 00:28:06,685        - Wait, wait, wait.              Rusty's waiting for                 more imaging?          605 00:28:06,751 --> 00:28:09,254   Did I get that wrong, Bash?       Because I could've sworn      606 00:28:09,320 --> 00:28:11,923      you asked me to set up      a psych referral. Yeah, you did. 607 00:28:11,990 --> 00:28:13,091             At least,                that's what I have here.     608 00:28:13,158 --> 00:28:15,527     - No, Arnold, you didn't              get that wrong.         609 00:28:15,593 --> 00:28:17,962             Thanks.                         - Okay...             610 00:28:19,898 --> 00:28:23,234       - It happened again.                   (sighing)            611 00:28:23,301 --> 00:28:25,170      - Do you remember what             you said to Rusty?        612 00:28:25,236 --> 00:28:27,405     - He convinced himself           that he has gallstones,      613 00:28:27,472 --> 00:28:29,541    but all the medical facts     pointed to an anxiety reaction,  614 00:28:29,607 --> 00:28:31,409            so I just--               - You wanted him to take     615 00:28:31,476 --> 00:28:33,078     the steps that you were               refusing to?            616 00:28:33,144 --> 00:28:34,813     I told you this morning                 to accept             617 00:28:34,879 --> 00:28:37,015   that this was happening and    to take yourself off the floor.  618 00:28:37,082 --> 00:28:39,517 - I was about to go talk to Devi      about it like you said,     619 00:28:39,584 --> 00:28:41,753      but then Mags needed me         to talk to Devi as well,     620 00:28:41,820 --> 00:28:43,188 so I wanted to be there for her. 621 00:28:43,254 --> 00:28:44,422 - You risked your own wellbeing, 622 00:28:44,489 --> 00:28:46,024         not to mention                your other patients'.       623 00:28:46,091 --> 00:28:47,759       - With the exception           of sending Rusty to you,     624 00:28:47,826 --> 00:28:49,928   I only saw one patient, who       I was with when I gapped!     625 00:28:49,994 --> 00:28:51,563           - Bashir...               - No, she was saying that     626 00:28:51,629 --> 00:28:52,964       she was having these              personality changes       627 00:28:53,031 --> 00:28:54,499        due to depression,               but it was actually       628 00:28:54,566 --> 00:28:56,334    because of a giant tumour              in her head.            629 00:28:56,401 --> 00:28:58,002  - Bash, do you hear yourself?   630 00:28:58,069 --> 00:29:00,205  You say our work is pointless,          ignore my advice,        631 00:29:00,271 --> 00:29:02,340     and then demand for help              on your terms?          632 00:29:03,808 --> 00:29:05,410            (sighing)             633 00:29:06,311 --> 00:29:08,613       Do you remember what            your patient was saying         when you were triggered?     634 00:29:08,680 --> 00:29:10,782     - Yeah, that the damage               had been done           635 00:29:10,849 --> 00:29:12,484  and it was too late to fix it,  636 00:29:12,550 --> 00:29:14,552      and I guess that just            made me feel like...        637 00:29:14,619 --> 00:29:18,690     Look, when I came back to     myself, I was talking to Devi.  638 00:29:19,991 --> 00:29:21,893            And, uh...            639 00:29:21,960 --> 00:29:23,495    And now, my patient's gone    640 00:29:23,561 --> 00:29:25,997   and I may have really messed          things up for Mags.       641 00:29:26,064 --> 00:29:27,899        - You need to take                 responsibility          642 00:29:27,966 --> 00:29:31,402      for your actions today.      Or I'll have to do it for you.  643 00:29:31,469 --> 00:29:34,172   You know, it might be a good     idea if I get you an Ativan.   644 00:29:35,140 --> 00:29:37,642        - When it happened                  this morning,          645 00:29:39,177 --> 00:29:41,546     I texted my friend Saleh                 in Syria.            646 00:29:41,613 --> 00:29:46,084       And I guess I offered      to sponsor both him and his wife        to come to Canada.        647 00:29:46,151 --> 00:29:47,752  Even though I can't afford it.  648 00:29:47,819 --> 00:29:49,554      And then everything's           so uncertain right now,      649 00:29:49,621 --> 00:29:51,523       what was I thinking?             - That you miss him.       650 00:29:51,589 --> 00:29:53,925      That you deserve love               and friendship.          651 00:29:53,992 --> 00:29:56,494    Because you're not broken          and some part of you        652 00:29:56,561 --> 00:29:58,029     actually believes that.      653 00:30:06,004 --> 00:30:09,174         I need it off!           - Owen, you need to stay still.  654 00:30:09,240 --> 00:30:11,509           (screaming)            655 00:30:12,410 --> 00:30:15,446  - I need to scratch, it hurts!             It itches.            656 00:30:15,513 --> 00:30:16,548      - Okay, what happened?      657 00:30:16,614 --> 00:30:18,316          - Who has been                 in here besides me?       658 00:30:18,383 --> 00:30:21,753   He's reacting to something.      - Well, I don't see a rash.    659 00:30:21,820 --> 00:30:23,188  - Sometimes he just feels it.             (screaming)            660 00:30:23,254 --> 00:30:24,789 - Okay, Owen, what do you need?  661 00:30:24,856 --> 00:30:26,491      What can we do to make              you feel better?         662 00:30:26,558 --> 00:30:27,826 - You don't really want to know. 663 00:30:27,892 --> 00:30:29,093    You'll use it as a reason     664 00:30:29,160 --> 00:30:31,596   to stop me from doing things             I want to do.          665 00:30:31,663 --> 00:30:34,132 - Owen, I just want to help you.         - Nothing helps!         666 00:30:34,199 --> 00:30:37,569  Nothing ever helps! I'm stuck       this way and I hate it!      667 00:30:37,635 --> 00:30:39,704   Make me sleep again, please!   668 00:30:39,771 --> 00:30:43,107          Make me numb.               I just want to be numb!      669 00:30:43,174 --> 00:30:46,678        (breathing heavily)       670 00:30:47,445 --> 00:30:49,180    - I'll get you a sedative.    671 00:30:51,549 --> 00:30:54,419    - Hey, Theo, can you cover     the rest of my patients today?  672 00:30:54,485 --> 00:30:56,621  - Uh, yeah, sure, I think so.            Just one sec.           673 00:30:56,688 --> 00:30:58,256 Arnold, I need 30mg of ketamine  674 00:30:58,323 --> 00:30:59,858        and 10 cetirizine                 for Owen, stat.          675 00:30:59,924 --> 00:31:01,960 - On it, I'll meet you in there.       - What's this about?       676 00:31:02,026 --> 00:31:03,494         This about Mags?                     She okay?            677 00:31:03,561 --> 00:31:04,996      I've been texting you         for info, but you haven't--    678 00:31:05,063 --> 00:31:07,365     - No, no, no, it's not.       It's not. I'll explain later.   679 00:31:07,432 --> 00:31:09,601     Arnold, can you help him        with the patient transfer?    680 00:31:09,667 --> 00:31:11,002             - Yeah.              681 00:31:13,204 --> 00:31:15,273 - Dr. Thibeault, I wanted to...  682 00:31:15,340 --> 00:31:16,574       You don't look so...       683 00:31:16,641 --> 00:31:18,176             Hey, hey.                      Have a seat.           684 00:31:18,243 --> 00:31:20,245          Are you okay?                       - Yes.               685 00:31:20,311 --> 00:31:22,080     It's a rash, it's fine.      686 00:31:22,146 --> 00:31:25,016     You're going to tell me        that's all in my head, too.    687 00:31:25,083 --> 00:31:27,819    - The psych consult could        have been handled better.     688 00:31:27,886 --> 00:31:30,021             (sighing)                    - Damn straight.         689 00:31:30,088 --> 00:31:32,690    - But I never said it was        all in your head, Rusty.      690 00:31:32,757 --> 00:31:35,693        Gallstones or not,          what you're feeling is real.   691 00:31:35,760 --> 00:31:37,295             May I?                           - Yeah.              692 00:31:37,362 --> 00:31:38,963            - Breathe.            693 00:31:41,332 --> 00:31:43,701       Are you experiencing             airway constriction?       694 00:31:43,768 --> 00:31:46,070   Because your lips look like      they're starting to swell.     695 00:31:46,137 --> 00:31:49,040        - Yeah. I think so.                  - With me.            696 00:31:49,741 --> 00:31:53,144   Anaphylaxis is not a symptom            of gallstones.          697 00:31:53,211 --> 00:31:55,046  Are you allergic to anything?   698 00:31:55,113 --> 00:31:58,549    - No, radioactive imaging,         tracer dye apparently.      699 00:31:58,616 --> 00:32:01,119      - Wait, did you inject              yourself with it?        700 00:32:01,185 --> 00:32:02,654      - You wouldn't get me                a HIDA scan,            701 00:32:02,720 --> 00:32:04,122      I had to take matters             into my own hands!         702 00:32:04,188 --> 00:32:06,190      - So in order to prove          that you had gallstones,     703 00:32:06,257 --> 00:32:08,359 your plan was to scan yourself.  704 00:32:08,426 --> 00:32:09,861            That's...             705 00:32:09,928 --> 00:32:11,729        Lie back, please.         706 00:32:11,796 --> 00:32:13,064            (sighing)             707 00:32:15,166 --> 00:32:17,335     Okay, one, two, three...     708 00:32:19,103 --> 00:32:20,872    We'll give it two minutes.    709 00:32:20,939 --> 00:32:23,841      We're going to get you         on fluids, antihistamines,    710 00:32:23,908 --> 00:32:26,311      and steroids to flush         the dye out of your system.    711 00:32:26,377 --> 00:32:28,046    And then you should start           to feel much better        712 00:32:28,112 --> 00:32:31,282 if you want to go back to work.       - No, not like this.        713 00:32:31,349 --> 00:32:33,985        - Would you like me             to let someone know?       714 00:32:34,052 --> 00:32:36,587  - I don't want anyone knowing      that I do this to myself.     715 00:32:38,589 --> 00:32:42,293    Maybe calling psych wasn't      the worst idea in the world.   716 00:32:48,199 --> 00:32:50,802             - Hey.                      - Did you get it?         717 00:32:50,868 --> 00:32:54,105  - Uh-huh. Aren't you supposed    to be in bed on antibiotics?    718 00:32:54,172 --> 00:32:56,674    - Yeah, the infusion went        through. Is that for me?               Can I see it?           719 00:32:56,741 --> 00:32:58,943      - You don't have to act      like a spy. They're your labs.  720 00:32:59,010 --> 00:33:00,812    - Yeah, my surgeon already          thinks I'm a problem.      721 00:33:00,878 --> 00:33:02,914 But you know, I read his review         on "Rate My MD",          722 00:33:02,981 --> 00:33:05,516     and one of his patients          said that he didn't go             through the risks,         723 00:33:05,583 --> 00:33:08,619    and another that he changed   course and she wasn't consented. 724 00:33:08,686 --> 00:33:10,388        My white blood cell               count is normal.         725 00:33:10,455 --> 00:33:12,490          - That's good.          - If you're just gonna spit back 726 00:33:12,557 --> 00:33:15,093   out things I already know...            - Do you know?          727 00:33:15,159 --> 00:33:17,495     Because you're not acting      like somebody who's relieved       that they're good to go.     728 00:33:17,562 --> 00:33:19,530        Or that they have              an excellent surgeon.       729 00:33:19,597 --> 00:33:22,200   - Have you seen Bash? He was   supposed to talk to Devi for me, 730 00:33:22,266 --> 00:33:25,403     but he never came back           and I need to know what           she says before I...        731 00:33:25,470 --> 00:33:28,039          - Before what?                     - Before...           732 00:33:28,873 --> 00:33:30,842     - Before you go through                with this?             733 00:33:30,908 --> 00:33:34,245 Are you trying to get out of it?               - No.              734 00:33:34,312 --> 00:33:36,047             - Mags.              735 00:33:36,114 --> 00:33:37,648         - I don't know.          736 00:33:39,017 --> 00:33:42,286  Even if I was, it's obviously         out of my control.         737 00:33:42,353 --> 00:33:45,223            (beeping)             738 00:33:46,524 --> 00:33:47,725            (sighing)             739 00:33:47,792 --> 00:33:50,695   - Novak started a firestorm         and then he vanished.       740 00:33:50,762 --> 00:33:53,564      And now Devi wants me              to sell him out.          741 00:33:53,631 --> 00:33:56,067            Which is...                 really not important       742 00:33:56,134 --> 00:33:57,869  considering what you're going         through right now.         743 00:33:57,935 --> 00:34:00,138      - Please don't say it.      744 00:34:00,204 --> 00:34:01,739    - I'm just trying to help.    745 00:34:01,806 --> 00:34:04,542     - Yeah, well, you just...      you take it all for granted.   746 00:34:04,609 --> 00:34:06,677              - What?             - Yeah, you're out of residency. 747 00:34:06,744 --> 00:34:08,446  You've got everything you've     wanted right in front of you.   748 00:34:08,513 --> 00:34:10,915    Meanwhile, the exact date           that I get the job         749 00:34:10,982 --> 00:34:13,251    I nearly killed myself for,    I found out that this happens.  750 00:34:13,317 --> 00:34:15,319          And if I say no                to the transplant,        751 00:34:15,386 --> 00:34:17,055     my dumb defective heart           that I was born with        752 00:34:17,121 --> 00:34:19,524 could just give out at anytime.    Or maybe never, who knows!     753 00:34:19,590 --> 00:34:22,226 And now, apparently, I'm moving     back in with my parents.      754 00:34:22,827 --> 00:34:27,732 - You're moving out of my house?   - My mom, she rented a place   755 00:34:27,799 --> 00:34:30,601       behind my back, yeah.      - She's probably just trying to, 756 00:34:30,668 --> 00:34:34,672 you know, help you not have to   worry about things and, like...  757 00:34:34,739 --> 00:34:36,641   - Why are you defending her?   758 00:34:37,608 --> 00:34:41,312     - You know, not all of us       have people just lining up        trying to love us, Mags!     759 00:34:41,379 --> 00:34:45,049 - June. Uh, your hernia patient. 760 00:34:45,116 --> 00:34:47,185          He's come down,             his heart rate's racing.     761 00:34:47,251 --> 00:34:50,588        And he's febrile...                    - Um...             762 00:34:50,655 --> 00:34:55,193 Can you prep him for Trauma OR?              - Yeah.              763 00:34:55,259 --> 00:34:56,994      Uh, Mags, is she okay?      764 00:34:58,329 --> 00:34:59,931              - No.               765 00:35:07,004 --> 00:35:08,639     and kidnap me this time!               - Oh, c'mon.           766 00:35:08,706 --> 00:35:11,275    We waited too long and now       he won't get in the chair.    767 00:35:11,342 --> 00:35:12,977          - Just relax.           768 00:35:13,044 --> 00:35:14,979       Hartley, look at me.       769 00:35:15,046 --> 00:35:16,914    The situation is serious.     770 00:35:16,981 --> 00:35:18,916  Your hernia's strangulated and   a prolonged lack of blood flow  771 00:35:18,983 --> 00:35:20,785    could cause organ failure             or even death.           772 00:35:20,852 --> 00:35:22,620   So you do need the surgery.           - Not if it means         773 00:35:22,687 --> 00:35:24,021        I have to go under.                    - Babe!             774 00:35:24,088 --> 00:35:26,057    What happened to you never          feeling afraid again?      775 00:35:26,124 --> 00:35:27,692          - The drugs you              forced on me wore off.      776 00:35:27,758 --> 00:35:30,194   Why would you do that to me?          How could you think               that would help?         777 00:35:30,261 --> 00:35:32,830   - I don't know. I couldn't       stand seeing you like that!    778 00:35:32,897 --> 00:35:34,632       - Oh, so you made it                about you, huh?         779 00:35:34,699 --> 00:35:36,634          - No! I... God,           why couldn't we just do this   780 00:35:36,701 --> 00:35:38,202    when he was feeling good?     781 00:35:38,269 --> 00:35:39,570       - Because that would              have been a crime.        782 00:35:39,637 --> 00:35:41,172       - See Dell, why does              literally everyone        783 00:35:41,239 --> 00:35:42,740   understand that except you?    784 00:35:42,807 --> 00:35:44,475    There must be some kind of          medicine we can try.       785 00:35:44,542 --> 00:35:46,377     - There isn't! You need        to face this like an adult.    786 00:35:46,444 --> 00:35:48,546         Get in the chair!              - Della, you can't--       787 00:35:48,613 --> 00:35:49,780  - Well, I can't watch him die!  788 00:35:49,847 --> 00:35:51,249         Hartley, get in                  the damn chair!          789 00:35:51,315 --> 00:35:52,650            - Never!                        - Let's go!            790 00:35:52,717 --> 00:35:54,619           (screaming)            791 00:35:54,685 --> 00:35:56,621   - June, you need help here?                - Yeah.              792 00:35:56,687 --> 00:35:57,855           - He bit me!           793 00:35:57,922 --> 00:35:59,390         - She drugged me                without my consent!       794 00:35:59,457 --> 00:36:01,626      - Alright, both of you            calm down right now.       795 00:36:03,361 --> 00:36:05,096            - Great.              796 00:36:06,664 --> 00:36:07,932          - Is he dead?           797 00:36:07,999 --> 00:36:10,801      - Nope, just in shock.                   - Good.             798 00:36:10,868 --> 00:36:13,371      Can we do the surgery             before he wakes up?        799 00:36:17,742 --> 00:36:19,143            (sighing)             800 00:36:20,178 --> 00:36:21,479   - The first time it happened   801 00:36:21,546 --> 00:36:23,080    it was with my old chief,               Dr. Bishop.            802 00:36:23,147 --> 00:36:25,883   He saw me, he asked me to go       to therapy and it helped.    803 00:36:25,950 --> 00:36:27,952 It hasn't happened in two years. 804 00:36:28,019 --> 00:36:32,990        - Okay... I'm sure               it's not been easy        805 00:36:33,057 --> 00:36:34,825     experiencing that again.     806 00:36:34,892 --> 00:36:39,130  - I know, I should've stopped    seeing patients immediately,    807 00:36:39,197 --> 00:36:41,966      but I really thought            I had it under control.      808 00:36:42,033 --> 00:36:45,503    - We get that feeling like        the walls are closing in,    809 00:36:45,570 --> 00:36:48,739     sometimes, our instincts             betray us and...         810 00:36:48,806 --> 00:36:51,509        create blind spots.       811 00:36:53,377 --> 00:36:55,379    Thank you for telling me.     812 00:36:57,715 --> 00:36:59,617  If there's anything you need--  813 00:36:59,684 --> 00:37:03,688           - Dr. Devi.             Hear me out about Mags again.   814 00:37:03,754 --> 00:37:08,059    If she was the right person   before, she still will be after. 815 00:37:08,125 --> 00:37:11,562      - That's what you said               last time, too.         816 00:37:11,629 --> 00:37:13,831            (sighing)             817 00:37:15,833 --> 00:37:19,036           (knocking)                  - Feeling any better?       818 00:37:19,103 --> 00:37:20,705           - A little.            819 00:37:21,806 --> 00:37:24,375   Is Mac going to stop trying     to help me after what I said?   820 00:37:24,442 --> 00:37:27,178    Because I don't feel like           that all the time.         821 00:37:27,245 --> 00:37:29,080   - No, Owen, definitely not.    822 00:37:29,146 --> 00:37:32,450     - But he's never going         to let me drive after this.    823 00:37:33,384 --> 00:37:35,419     - Let me see your phone.                  - Why?              824 00:37:35,486 --> 00:37:38,189     - Trust me. I'm not going       to read any of your texts.    825 00:37:41,359 --> 00:37:43,761        Do you know about                Kids Help Phone?          826 00:37:44,462 --> 00:37:46,797        So in those moments         when you feel out of control   827 00:37:46,864 --> 00:37:49,800       and you need someone              to talk to or text,       828 00:37:49,867 --> 00:37:52,503     it is totally anonymous      829 00:37:52,570 --> 00:37:55,139       and someone's always               there to respond.        830 00:38:00,578 --> 00:38:02,046            (sighing)             831 00:38:05,316 --> 00:38:08,452         - My plan was to                 phase out at 65.         832 00:38:08,519 --> 00:38:11,989      Barely anyone has room         in their practice anymore.    833 00:38:12,056 --> 00:38:14,592  I feel like I'd be abandoning          all those people          834 00:38:14,659 --> 00:38:16,394     I've known for so long.      835 00:38:16,460 --> 00:38:19,830     For some, it's not bad,            but kids like Owen,        836 00:38:19,897 --> 00:38:23,234   they're the reason I wanted       to do this kind of work.      837 00:38:23,968 --> 00:38:26,070         - Hard to turn               your back on a calling.      838 00:38:26,137 --> 00:38:28,506   - As long as I'm still doing         more good than harm.       839 00:38:29,173 --> 00:38:32,510      - I wrote up a letter              for his licence.          840 00:38:32,576 --> 00:38:35,579        See what you think?        - You saw what happened today.  841 00:38:35,646 --> 00:38:38,215 If that happened on the road...      - There's risks, yeah.       842 00:38:38,282 --> 00:38:41,686       But Owen is thinking         about his future which means           he wants to live.        843 00:38:42,253 --> 00:38:43,587    Look, it's your call, Mac.    844 00:38:43,654 --> 00:38:45,589      But I think we should                both sign it.           845 00:38:54,265 --> 00:38:55,599            (knocking)            846 00:38:57,535 --> 00:39:01,005      - Hey, I got that note             about the statement            you wanted me to sign.      847 00:39:01,072 --> 00:39:03,441    - Yeah, one of the weirder            incident reports         848 00:39:03,507 --> 00:39:05,476        I've had to fill.                     - Yeah.              849 00:39:05,543 --> 00:39:07,345       - How's our "biter?"               - Uh, apparently,        850 00:39:07,411 --> 00:39:09,246       losing consciousness              is a stroke of luck       851 00:39:09,313 --> 00:39:11,048    because we are not allowed             to let you die.         852 00:39:11,115 --> 00:39:13,417    So his hernia's fixed, and     now he's awake and he's happy,  853 00:39:13,484 --> 00:39:15,319   and they are in love again.    854 00:39:15,386 --> 00:39:16,954            (laughing)            855 00:39:17,021 --> 00:39:18,823        - What's that hair               metal song called?        856 00:39:18,889 --> 00:39:22,393    Uh... "Love hurts". Yeah.     857 00:39:22,460 --> 00:39:24,295         Those guys knew.         858 00:39:25,262 --> 00:39:29,467      - That was an intense         dad voice you used earlier.    859 00:39:30,868 --> 00:39:33,003           How's Henry?                       - Great.             860 00:39:33,070 --> 00:39:36,407        - Yeah? And... you?       861 00:39:36,474 --> 00:39:38,542            (sighing)                 - You know, it's funny.      862 00:39:38,609 --> 00:39:43,280  You and me were together all    that time and now we're just...  863 00:39:43,347 --> 00:39:46,884        passing each other          once in a while in the hall.   864 00:39:46,951 --> 00:39:48,853     - I guess that's on me.      865 00:39:49,754 --> 00:39:52,590     I feel really bad about            how I played that.         866 00:39:53,791 --> 00:39:58,129       Actually, about how           I've managed to screw up         most of my relationships.     867 00:39:58,195 --> 00:40:01,699   - Hey. Ours was on me, too.    868 00:40:04,168 --> 00:40:07,371         - No, it wasn't.                     (chuckle)            869 00:40:20,718 --> 00:40:22,586       - So what's supposed                to happen next?         870 00:40:22,653 --> 00:40:24,655     - They'll be retrieving       the donor heart late tonight.   871 00:40:24,722 --> 00:40:27,324   First thing in the morning,           we'll get going.          872 00:40:27,391 --> 00:40:30,528            - Magalie.                - What if I can't do it?     873 00:40:46,010 --> 00:40:47,578            (sighing)             874 00:40:51,382 --> 00:40:52,716              Okay.               875 00:40:59,056 --> 00:41:01,492         (phone ringing)          876 00:41:04,695 --> 00:41:05,963           - Hi, Sam.                       - Hi, June.            877 00:41:06,030 --> 00:41:07,932    Just letting you know that         everything's in order,      878 00:41:07,998 --> 00:41:09,333   so green light from our end    879 00:41:09,400 --> 00:41:11,602         if you want to do               your IUI tomorrow.        880 00:41:17,475 --> 00:41:19,109            (knocking)            881 00:41:20,711 --> 00:41:23,247   - Thanks for not cancelling              my surgery.            882 00:41:23,314 --> 00:41:25,950 And for the concerned messages.  883 00:41:26,016 --> 00:41:27,418     - I'm glad you're back.      884 00:41:27,485 --> 00:41:29,320        - They're coming                 to shave my head.         885 00:41:29,386 --> 00:41:30,921    What girl says no to that?    886 00:41:30,988 --> 00:41:33,023  - Do you have anyone with you?  887 00:41:33,090 --> 00:41:35,025   - My brother is on his way.    888 00:41:35,092 --> 00:41:36,427              - Hey.              889 00:41:36,494 --> 00:41:39,797     Weird question, but it's          been that kind of day.      890 00:41:40,798 --> 00:41:44,201      What did I say to you            that made you leave?        891 00:41:44,268 --> 00:41:47,037 - Made me leave and got me back. 892 00:41:47,104 --> 00:41:50,107       You said it was okay                 to be scared.          893 00:41:50,174 --> 00:41:54,211         That I just had            to let myself sit with that          and really feel it.        894 00:41:54,278 --> 00:41:56,480        And that somewhere,                in all of this,         895 00:41:56,547 --> 00:41:59,016 there's a way to find the light. 896 00:42:02,219 --> 00:42:03,954        - I'm here, Bash.         897 00:42:04,021 --> 00:42:06,857 Say what you want to say to me.  898 00:42:08,826 --> 00:42:11,428         - So many things                have happened to me       899 00:42:11,495 --> 00:42:13,497   that were out of my control.   900 00:42:13,564 --> 00:42:17,001     Been thinking about you             bringing us here,         901 00:42:17,067 --> 00:42:19,003    finding us in Crete and...    902 00:42:19,069 --> 00:42:21,105        After I got me and               my sister stuck...        903 00:42:21,171 --> 00:42:22,773  - You wish you hadn't let me?   904 00:42:22,840 --> 00:42:24,775        - No, not at all.         905 00:42:24,842 --> 00:42:28,646        Elliot, you, opened              your family to us.        906 00:42:30,114 --> 00:42:32,550        Disappearing from             your life, that was me.      907 00:42:32,616 --> 00:42:34,351     That was me being scared     908 00:42:34,418 --> 00:42:36,020      that I'd never be able             to build anything.        909 00:42:36,086 --> 00:42:39,156     Trying to control it and       getting mad when I couldn't.   910 00:42:40,591 --> 00:42:42,393            I'm sorry.            911 00:42:44,828 --> 00:42:49,233   But what I wanted to do was    to thank you for that properly.  912 00:42:50,234 --> 00:42:52,469          And to tell you                that we wouldn't be       913 00:42:52,536 --> 00:42:54,705 where we are today without you.  914 00:43:01,779 --> 00:43:04,081               (♪♪)               915 00:43:20,798 --> 00:43:23,934        Subtitles: difuze