1
00:00:08,007 --> 00:00:09,217
I'm cold.

2
00:00:09,927 --> 00:00:11,177
How long now?

3
00:00:13,472 --> 00:00:14,722
Shouldn't be too long.

4
00:00:15,432 --> 00:00:16,772
[sighs]

5
00:00:18,602 --> 00:00:19,692
Hello.

6
00:00:21,271 --> 00:00:22,691
[mailbox door squeaks]

7
00:00:42,125 --> 00:00:45,245
Right, we should put my family down
as references 'cause your family hate me.

8
00:00:45,337 --> 00:00:47,417
That's not true-- entirely.

9
00:00:47,506 --> 00:00:49,416
I don't even really want to put mine down,
to be honest.

10
00:00:49,508 --> 00:00:52,678
-Who do you want to put then?
-People who don't know us as well.

11
00:00:53,971 --> 00:00:56,891
I thought this was just supposed to be
an initial registration form.

12
00:00:56,974 --> 00:00:58,934
Yeah, but there's space
for additional info,

13
00:00:59,017 --> 00:01:00,847
-so I thought I'd just really sell us.
-Oh, yeah?

14
00:01:00,936 --> 00:01:02,976
Well, everyone exaggerates.
It's like a CV.

15
00:01:03,063 --> 00:01:05,823
"I have a keen interest
in the economics of green energy."

16
00:01:05,899 --> 00:01:08,359
-What? I do.
-Really?

17
00:01:08,443 --> 00:01:11,573
-Yeah. I read a book about it.
-Which one? Which one was it?

18
00:01:12,447 --> 00:01:14,197
-Okay, an article.
-Right.

19
00:01:14,283 --> 00:01:17,373
-All right, fine, a tweet.
-"I'm a proficient cellist..."

20
00:01:17,452 --> 00:01:19,542
They're not gonna have a cello
in their office to check, are they?

21
00:01:19,621 --> 00:01:22,211
"...and have played volleyball
to a county standard."

22
00:01:22,291 --> 00:01:24,461
-Oh, God. Oh, God.
-What?

23
00:01:24,543 --> 00:01:25,793
We have to list past relationships.

24
00:01:25,878 --> 00:01:27,338
-Really?
-Yeah.

25
00:01:27,421 --> 00:01:30,301
-Why?
-Dunno. Suppose they just have to check.

26
00:01:30,382 --> 00:01:33,052
-[stammers] What are they checking for?
-Dunno, just check.

27
00:01:33,135 --> 00:01:34,925
-They're being thorough.
-Seems a bit excessive, don't it?

28
00:01:35,012 --> 00:01:37,062
Yeah, but the exes know secrets,
don't they?

29
00:01:37,931 --> 00:01:38,931
Yep.

30
00:01:47,691 --> 00:01:49,481
Okay, if you wanna flick
to the back of your books,

31
00:01:49,568 --> 00:01:52,398
you'll find, um, a good list
of irregular verbs.

32
00:01:52,487 --> 00:01:53,567
All right?

33
00:02:05,334 --> 00:02:06,924
Okay, what have you got?

34
00:02:07,002 --> 00:02:09,252
[chattering]

35
00:02:09,338 --> 00:02:11,718
-Thanks for the class.
-No worries. Yeah.

36
00:02:11,798 --> 00:02:14,678
-I enjoy it.
-"Enjoyed." "I enjoyed it."

37
00:02:14,760 --> 00:02:17,100
I mean, we literally just did
half an hour on that.

38
00:02:17,179 --> 00:02:18,639
-Oh. I got it.
-Yeah.

39
00:02:18,722 --> 00:02:21,142
-So I enjoyed it.
-You enjoyed it. Good.

40
00:02:21,225 --> 00:02:23,185
-Yeah. See you.
-All right, have a good one.

41
00:02:37,199 --> 00:02:39,239
Did I tell you I found her
having lunch in the greenhouse?

42
00:02:39,326 --> 00:02:40,326
Why?

43
00:02:40,869 --> 00:02:43,909
She said it was warm.
Made her feel like she was on holiday.

44
00:02:43,997 --> 00:02:44,997
[Nikki chuckles]

45
00:02:45,541 --> 00:02:47,381
You don't think
she's getting Alzheimer's, do you?

46
00:02:47,459 --> 00:02:50,379
No, Karen,
I think she's always been like that.

47
00:02:50,462 --> 00:02:51,512
Good.

48
00:02:52,464 --> 00:02:55,134
Don't know what I'd talk to Dad about
for the next 20 years.

49
00:02:55,217 --> 00:02:57,587
-[phone ringing]
-[Karen sighs]

50
00:02:59,972 --> 00:03:01,522
How's Scott?

51
00:03:01,598 --> 00:03:02,768
Oh, fine.

52
00:03:03,559 --> 00:03:05,519
Has he got a job at all or...

53
00:03:06,270 --> 00:03:09,400
Well, it's 11:30,
and he's called me five times now.

54
00:03:10,482 --> 00:03:12,032
On the plus side,

55
00:03:12,109 --> 00:03:14,399
I haven't missed a parcel delivery
in months. [chuckles]

56
00:03:15,487 --> 00:03:17,567
Did you tell him
about the vacancy at my place?

57
00:03:17,656 --> 00:03:18,696
Yeah.

58
00:03:18,782 --> 00:03:23,252
He didn't want to work in a call center.
He says he hasn't completely given up.

59
00:03:24,997 --> 00:03:27,077
Okay. Right.

60
00:03:28,375 --> 00:03:30,125
Well, who's paying the rent then?

61
00:03:30,544 --> 00:03:32,714
-It's just temporary.
-Okay.

62
00:03:33,547 --> 00:03:36,007
Okay. [sighs]

63
00:03:36,091 --> 00:03:39,051
Just as long as you feel empowered
as a person.

64
00:03:39,136 --> 00:03:41,596
You know, just be able to voice your needs
as well as thinking about--

65
00:03:41,680 --> 00:03:42,720
Okay. No, no, no.

66
00:03:42,806 --> 00:03:45,426
You're talking like an American again.
You know I hate it when you do that.

67
00:03:45,517 --> 00:03:46,727
[ship horn blows]

68
00:03:49,146 --> 00:03:52,016
-Don't mention anything when you see him.
-No, I won't.

69
00:03:54,985 --> 00:03:56,195
[Karen sighs]

70
00:03:56,278 --> 00:03:58,318
He says he's invented
a new type of cereal.

71
00:03:58,405 --> 00:04:02,325
So, you know,
maybe something will come of that.

72
00:04:03,327 --> 00:04:05,657
-Yeah.
-Hey, move over.

73
00:04:05,746 --> 00:04:08,036
Karen, why do you always have to walk
on the water side?

74
00:04:08,123 --> 00:04:09,713
Because I'm the oldest.

75
00:04:13,420 --> 00:04:16,340
Oh, I didn't tell you:
Scott's coming tonight.

76
00:04:16,423 --> 00:04:19,263
-Why can't my sister attract nice men?
-[cash register beeping]

77
00:04:19,343 --> 00:04:21,763
She's nice and clever.

78
00:04:21,845 --> 00:04:23,755
She's cleverer than me, and I have you.

79
00:04:24,681 --> 00:04:26,481
You listening?

80
00:04:26,558 --> 00:04:27,638
Yeah. What's tonight?

81
00:04:28,393 --> 00:04:30,603
-Dinner. Karen. You're coming.
-[groans]

82
00:04:30,687 --> 00:04:32,977
No, do not bail on me.
I'm not dealing with him on my own.

83
00:04:33,065 --> 00:04:34,935
-He's all right.
-He is not all right.

84
00:04:35,817 --> 00:04:38,237
He's a snob who thinks
he's better than we are.

85
00:04:38,695 --> 00:04:40,025
He doesn't even have a TV.

86
00:04:40,113 --> 00:04:42,573
And he's so proud of that,
as if it's an achievement.

87
00:04:42,658 --> 00:04:45,908
He's a pretentious prick
in a polo neck. It--

88
00:04:45,994 --> 00:04:48,254
-Are you listening?
-Yeah.

89
00:04:49,331 --> 00:04:51,921
Bet he owns a bloody record player.

90
00:04:53,710 --> 00:04:54,920
Yeah, well.

91
00:04:55,003 --> 00:04:56,003
[scanner beeps]

92
00:04:57,172 --> 00:04:59,682
-No, we're gonna pay with cash.
-Why?

93
00:05:00,259 --> 00:05:03,639
They can check our bank accounts.
They can see everything we do.

94
00:05:03,720 --> 00:05:05,260
-Who can?
-Adoption people.

95
00:05:06,181 --> 00:05:08,561
Things like alcohol, cigarettes,
we pay cash. No paper trail.

96
00:05:08,642 --> 00:05:10,772
Bloody hell. Should we get
some burner phones as well?

97
00:05:10,853 --> 00:05:12,313
-Do you have any ID?
-Yeah.

98
00:05:13,146 --> 00:05:14,726
Tell me, you're being serious, yeah?

99
00:05:15,148 --> 00:05:16,978
Well, you need ID for alcohol.

100
00:05:17,526 --> 00:05:18,856
Look at my face.

101
00:05:18,944 --> 00:05:20,404
No, I'm sorry, I need proof.

102
00:05:21,446 --> 00:05:22,906
My face is proof.

103
00:05:24,032 --> 00:05:25,032
Here.

104
00:05:25,450 --> 00:05:26,540
Thank you.

105
00:05:26,618 --> 00:05:28,288
What's the matter with you today?

106
00:05:38,547 --> 00:05:40,797
We need stuff that makes us look good.

107
00:05:41,550 --> 00:05:43,140
We should donate to a charity.

108
00:05:43,218 --> 00:05:45,348
-Then we can say we've donated to charity.
-Which one?

109
00:05:45,429 --> 00:05:47,309
Um, maybe a children's one?

110
00:05:47,931 --> 00:05:49,771
-Or is that a bit too obvious? Yeah.
-Bit obvious.

111
00:05:49,850 --> 00:05:51,270
-What about animals?
-Oh, God, no.

112
00:05:51,351 --> 00:05:53,731
Only awful people
donate to animal charities.

113
00:05:53,812 --> 00:05:55,652
-Help the Aged?
-Yeah, I like that.

114
00:05:55,731 --> 00:05:58,361
That says we're good people
but not in a "look at me" kind of way.

115
00:05:58,442 --> 00:05:59,532
I'll do it now.

116
00:05:59,610 --> 00:06:02,030
No, but don't give too much
that it makes them suspicious.

117
00:06:02,112 --> 00:06:04,622
Like we've been bad to an old person,
and now we feel guilty.

118
00:06:04,698 --> 00:06:05,908
Oh, we should join the National Trust.

119
00:06:05,991 --> 00:06:09,201
That suggests an air
of, um, calmness and dependability.

120
00:06:09,286 --> 00:06:11,246
-Yeah. I like that.
-Yeah.

121
00:06:11,997 --> 00:06:14,667
We're now fully catfishing
social services.

122
00:06:14,750 --> 00:06:18,130
No, we shouldn't think of this form
as a record of who we are,

123
00:06:18,212 --> 00:06:19,962
-but a picture of who we're gonna be.
-Mm.

124
00:06:20,047 --> 00:06:22,837
This is an aspirational form.

125
00:06:22,925 --> 00:06:24,835
-Very aspirational.
-It's fine.

126
00:06:24,927 --> 00:06:27,677
As long as we're these people
by the time they meet us, it's all good.

127
00:06:27,763 --> 00:06:29,563
Oh! Oh!

128
00:06:29,640 --> 00:06:32,850
We should make a list of all the flaws
that we want to iron out.

129
00:06:33,560 --> 00:06:36,860
Honestly, Jase, I am so impressed with us.

130
00:06:36,939 --> 00:06:39,399
I think we're gonna be amazing parents.

131
00:06:43,445 --> 00:06:45,155
Okay, this is good.

132
00:06:45,239 --> 00:06:47,489
-I'm feeling positive.
-Absolutely. Yeah.

133
00:06:47,574 --> 00:06:50,124
-You drink too much.
-What? That's--

134
00:06:51,036 --> 00:06:52,366
You think I've got a problem?

135
00:06:52,454 --> 00:06:54,874
It takes me two trips
to take the recycling out.

136
00:06:55,374 --> 00:06:56,964
Every parent I know drinks a lot.

137
00:06:57,042 --> 00:06:59,172
Maybe when we get the kid,
get back on the drink.

138
00:06:59,253 --> 00:07:02,013
But perhaps while we're being assessed,
just lay off it a little.

139
00:07:02,089 --> 00:07:03,919
-Yeah? All right.
-Okay.

140
00:07:06,552 --> 00:07:10,972
-"Sometimes occasionally
-Mm.

141
00:07:11,056 --> 00:07:17,686
drinks a bit too much?"

142
00:07:18,397 --> 00:07:19,397
-Okay?
-Yeah.

143
00:07:19,481 --> 00:07:22,611
-Well, you should stop smoking.
-[scoffs]

144
00:07:22,693 --> 00:07:24,533
There'll be a medical,
and, you know, you're older.

145
00:07:24,611 --> 00:07:27,281
-I'm three years older than you.
-You should know better, then,

146
00:07:27,364 --> 00:07:29,034
-shouldn't you?
-All right, fine. I'll stop.

147
00:07:29,116 --> 00:07:29,946
-Really?
-Yeah.

148
00:07:30,033 --> 00:07:32,243
It's not something I'm addicted to.
It's just something I do.

149
00:07:32,327 --> 00:07:33,537
Yeah, okay.

150
00:07:35,163 --> 00:07:37,083
-Also, I think that
-Mm.

151
00:07:37,165 --> 00:07:39,205
you need to work on your anger.

152
00:07:39,668 --> 00:07:40,668
My anger?

153
00:07:42,462 --> 00:07:44,132
My anger's fine, maybe.

154
00:07:44,214 --> 00:07:46,264
Okay. "Look at my face. My face is proof."

155
00:07:46,341 --> 00:07:48,341
-That was nothing.
-Yeah, to you, Jase.

156
00:07:48,427 --> 00:07:49,967
You've got-- You've got an angry energy.

157
00:07:50,053 --> 00:07:51,603
What are you talking about,
"angry energy"?

158
00:07:52,306 --> 00:07:53,386
[scoffs]

159
00:07:54,057 --> 00:07:57,517
-Fine, put it down. Yeah.
-"Angry energy."

160
00:07:57,603 --> 00:07:59,023
[Jason] Mm.

161
00:07:59,104 --> 00:08:00,814
Okay, what else?

162
00:08:04,026 --> 00:08:05,486
-No, go on.
-Nah, nothing.

163
00:08:05,569 --> 00:08:08,319
-It's all right. You can say.
-Okay.

164
00:08:09,823 --> 00:08:10,823
All right.

165
00:08:11,783 --> 00:08:14,333
Now, I want you to breathe.

166
00:08:14,411 --> 00:08:16,541
[chuckles]

167
00:08:16,622 --> 00:08:19,252
I think that you need
to get stronger emotionally.

168
00:08:21,460 --> 00:08:22,290
What?

169
00:08:23,795 --> 00:08:27,045
-See?
-I am strong. I am really strong.

170
00:08:27,132 --> 00:08:29,012
The last year's taken its toll, hasn't it?

171
00:08:29,092 --> 00:08:31,552
I just think you need to build up
a little bit more resilience.

172
00:08:31,637 --> 00:08:33,637
-That's all I'm saying.
-You don't think I'm resilient?

173
00:08:33,722 --> 00:08:36,232
Last week, you cried because you saw
a duck on its own in a pond.

174
00:08:36,308 --> 00:08:38,018
Yeah, because I'm a human with a heart.

175
00:08:38,101 --> 00:08:40,101
Just a little bit stronger,
that's all I'm saying.

176
00:08:40,187 --> 00:08:43,017
-I don't want to turn into a sociopath.
-A little more resilient.

177
00:08:43,106 --> 00:08:45,776
Yeah? Kids can put a lot of pressure
on people, can't they?

178
00:08:47,361 --> 00:08:49,031
Okay, well, that is true.

179
00:08:50,447 --> 00:08:52,697
-You know, I was talking to Erica.
-Yeah.

180
00:08:52,783 --> 00:08:54,543
-And she told me that her and Freddy,
-Uh-huh.

181
00:08:54,618 --> 00:08:58,368
they haven't had sex for six months.

182
00:08:59,331 --> 00:09:00,541
-Really?
-Yeah.

183
00:09:00,624 --> 00:09:01,794
-She said it's just gone cold.
-God.

184
00:09:01,875 --> 00:09:03,335
I think he was freaked out
by the pregnancy.

185
00:09:03,418 --> 00:09:04,668
-Shit.
-Hayley and Dan are the same.

186
00:09:04,753 --> 00:09:05,753
-No.
-Yeah.

187
00:09:05,838 --> 00:09:07,668
Christ, six months.

188
00:09:08,632 --> 00:09:09,842
Six.

189
00:09:10,467 --> 00:09:14,297
-Do you wanna know something really awful?
-What? Go on.

190
00:09:16,431 --> 00:09:19,521
I think our friends' marriage problems
makes me horny.

191
00:09:21,228 --> 00:09:23,728
-That's bad, isn't it?
-I mean, it's niche, yeah.

192
00:09:51,258 --> 00:09:55,678
Well done. All right then.
Let's get this in the postbox, shall we?

193
00:09:55,762 --> 00:09:58,222
-Oh, no, wait, wait, wait, wait.
-Wait for what? What now?

194
00:10:00,225 --> 00:10:02,895
Right, if you apply it directly,
it's too much.

195
00:10:02,978 --> 00:10:04,268
-So you spray...
-Yeah?

196
00:10:05,397 --> 00:10:06,607
delay...

197
00:10:08,192 --> 00:10:09,572
and walk away.

198
00:10:10,485 --> 00:10:12,105
-Come on!
-Aye.

199
00:10:13,405 --> 00:10:16,405
-Okay. Ready?
-Mm-hmm.

200
00:10:16,491 --> 00:10:19,121
-Let it go.
-No, you let it go. There.

201
00:10:48,398 --> 00:10:51,818
Being unemployed has just been
incredibly freeing, you know?

202
00:10:51,902 --> 00:10:58,582
I have so much more energy now
for life, philosophy, art, museums.

203
00:10:58,951 --> 00:11:02,001
Oh, we're going to a great
multimedia exhibition if you want to come.

204
00:11:02,079 --> 00:11:04,119
Oh, no.
I never really understand that stuff.

205
00:11:04,206 --> 00:11:08,036
It's not about understanding, is it?
It's about how it makes you feel.

206
00:11:08,126 --> 00:11:09,916
Well, it makes me feel stupid.

207
00:11:10,003 --> 00:11:13,173
No, don't say-- don't--
I hate it when people say that.

208
00:11:14,007 --> 00:11:20,177
You can't survive culturally
on Britain's Got Talent and Love Island.

209
00:11:20,264 --> 00:11:22,354
You should come
to one of my dinner parties.

210
00:11:22,975 --> 00:11:26,055
I style them as a sort of
modern-day salon littéraire.

211
00:11:26,144 --> 00:11:27,524
Oh, God. [laughs]

212
00:11:29,481 --> 00:11:32,071
Yeah. Yeah, great, yeah.

213
00:11:32,150 --> 00:11:34,740
[other patrons murmuring]

214
00:11:38,282 --> 00:11:41,202
-[Scott smacks lips, sighs]
-All right, so, dinner parties:

215
00:11:41,285 --> 00:11:43,785
Anyone living or dead,
who would you have?

216
00:11:43,871 --> 00:11:46,211
Probably my father.

217
00:11:47,416 --> 00:11:49,376
There were a lot of things left unsaid.

218
00:11:51,170 --> 00:11:52,170
Right.

219
00:11:55,048 --> 00:11:57,508
So, where's Jason?

220
00:11:57,593 --> 00:12:00,803
Yeah, sorry. He had to take a class.
He only told me last minute.

221
00:12:00,888 --> 00:12:03,018
-Mm.
-Yeah. [chuckles]

222
00:12:06,435 --> 00:12:09,305
-[pop music playing]
-[cheers and applause]

223
00:12:11,148 --> 00:12:12,148
[door opens]

224
00:12:17,738 --> 00:12:18,568
Hi.

225
00:12:25,078 --> 00:12:27,078
Couldn't have thought of somewhere new
for us to meet?

226
00:12:27,164 --> 00:12:29,374
-Evidently, no. [chuckles]
-[chuckles]

227
00:12:32,252 --> 00:12:33,462
So, why am I here?

228
00:12:35,797 --> 00:12:38,877
Then one of my year ten netball girls
throws a ball at my head.

229
00:12:38,967 --> 00:12:41,797
Cut my lip open.
Tells me I'm a shit coach.

230
00:12:41,887 --> 00:12:44,677
I said, "Well, you hit me,
so I must be doing something right."

231
00:12:44,765 --> 00:12:46,475
[laughs] Karen.

232
00:12:46,558 --> 00:12:49,388
I don't know how you both do it, you know?

233
00:12:49,478 --> 00:12:52,228
Every day, eight hours, week after week.

234
00:12:53,357 --> 00:12:55,277
How is the job search going?

235
00:12:55,567 --> 00:12:56,567
Uh...

236
00:12:57,236 --> 00:13:00,446
Yeah, nothing really, uh,
feels quite right at the moment,

237
00:13:00,531 --> 00:13:01,621
-you know?
-Huh.

238
00:13:01,698 --> 00:13:03,828
I'm really about life balance, and, um...

239
00:13:04,993 --> 00:13:09,463
I don't know, juggling work and
a social life, it's, uh, well, it's hard.

240
00:13:09,540 --> 00:13:11,750
His friend said
he could get him in at his bank.

241
00:13:11,834 --> 00:13:14,884
City, not High Street.
He went and talked to them.

242
00:13:14,962 --> 00:13:18,092
Mm. Yeah, I wanted to see if I could
really care about money,

243
00:13:18,173 --> 00:13:20,183
-like, on a fundamental level?
-Mm.

244
00:13:20,259 --> 00:13:23,179
Um, but [smacks lips], you know,
turns out I just can't.

245
00:13:24,179 --> 00:13:26,059
Right, and then the hospital thing,
that wasn't--

246
00:13:26,139 --> 00:13:29,429
I feel like hospital administration
is maybe a bit of a bubble.

247
00:13:29,518 --> 00:13:30,638
-Hmm.
-For me, it's really--

248
00:13:30,727 --> 00:13:34,767
it's just about finding
something meaningful in my life.

249
00:13:34,857 --> 00:13:37,027
Well, she teaches children to read.

250
00:13:37,109 --> 00:13:40,149
She does, yeah.
But I mean, like, on a more macro level.

251
00:13:42,114 --> 00:13:44,374
It's nice that you have a girlfriend
who will support you

252
00:13:44,449 --> 00:13:45,529
while you figure stuff out.

253
00:13:45,617 --> 00:13:47,037
Ah. Yeah, well [smacks lips]...

254
00:13:48,120 --> 00:13:51,750
I think if she forced me to do something
that I didn't really love, I would just...

255
00:13:51,832 --> 00:13:52,962
[inhales deeply]

256
00:13:53,041 --> 00:13:54,961
...end up resenting her for it.

257
00:13:56,336 --> 00:13:58,416
-[inhales sharply] So, shall we order?
-Yeah.

258
00:13:58,505 --> 00:14:00,255
Yeah. Don't worry, I know this place.
[snaps fingers]

259
00:14:00,340 --> 00:14:02,840
¡Chica! Yeah, you. Mm.

260
00:14:03,552 --> 00:14:04,972
You know this is tapas.

261
00:14:05,053 --> 00:14:07,063
They spit in your food,
they spit in all our food.

262
00:14:11,727 --> 00:14:14,977
-Okay. So, um...
-[Jane clears throat]

263
00:14:15,063 --> 00:14:17,773
Right. We're, um, we're adopting.

264
00:14:17,858 --> 00:14:20,188
Well, w-we're trying to adopt.

265
00:14:21,612 --> 00:14:27,782
And, um, later on, we're gonna need
references from ex-partners.

266
00:14:27,868 --> 00:14:29,238
-Wow.
-Yeah.

267
00:14:29,328 --> 00:14:31,578
And they're gonna be quite thorough.

268
00:14:31,663 --> 00:14:34,503
And if you put a foot wrong, then, uh,

269
00:14:34,583 --> 00:14:36,633
they can reject you, so...

270
00:14:37,628 --> 00:14:40,208
And you're worried that I hate you
and will ruin your life.

271
00:14:40,297 --> 00:14:42,797
-Basically, yeah. Yeah.
-[both laugh]

272
00:14:43,550 --> 00:14:44,680
Yeah.

273
00:14:45,135 --> 00:14:47,885
Okay, well, um, I'll talk to them, yeah.

274
00:14:47,971 --> 00:14:49,101
Okay, great.

275
00:14:49,890 --> 00:14:52,520
-Yeah.
-Great. Amazing.

276
00:14:52,601 --> 00:14:54,731
I can tell them about
your toxic masculinity

277
00:14:54,811 --> 00:14:56,401
and how unavailable you were emotionally.

278
00:14:56,480 --> 00:14:58,900
I'm not sure it's fair to criticize me
with phrases that didn't exist

279
00:14:58,982 --> 00:15:00,152
when we were going out, but--

280
00:15:00,234 --> 00:15:06,784
Oh, you'd rather I say you're dependable,
reliable, like an all-round great guy?

281
00:15:06,865 --> 00:15:10,695
-Right, ideally, yes.
-Okay, sure.

282
00:15:11,828 --> 00:15:12,828
All right.

283
00:15:14,498 --> 00:15:16,788
-So, you want me to lie?
-No, I'm not asking you to lie.

284
00:15:16,875 --> 00:15:18,835
-No, no one's lying.
-No one's lying? Really?

285
00:15:18,919 --> 00:15:20,169
No.

286
00:15:20,254 --> 00:15:22,134
You're gonna tell them
how you two got together?

287
00:15:23,549 --> 00:15:26,259
-I know I could have handled it better.
-Does she know?

288
00:15:26,343 --> 00:15:29,263
[stammering] Yeah, she knows
that there was a bit of an overlap.

289
00:15:29,346 --> 00:15:31,516
-Yeah.
-Shall we start calling it an affair?

290
00:15:31,598 --> 00:15:34,598
A bit y-young for that, weren't we?
I mean, it was--

291
00:15:34,685 --> 00:15:36,645
Adults have affairs.
It was a ten-day overlap.

292
00:15:36,728 --> 00:15:37,938
It was a ten-day affair.

293
00:15:38,981 --> 00:15:42,571
[stammering] I suppose I just thought it
was over a long time before it was over.

294
00:15:42,985 --> 00:15:44,315
-What's that supposed to mean?
-Come on.

295
00:15:44,403 --> 00:15:47,033
It was a six-month relationship
which lasted for three years

296
00:15:47,114 --> 00:15:49,784
because neither of us
had the guts to end it, all right?

297
00:15:49,867 --> 00:15:51,367
You checked out way before I met Nikki.

298
00:15:51,451 --> 00:15:54,871
I checked out to protect myself,
because I knew you'd screw me over.

299
00:15:54,955 --> 00:15:56,665
Well, that was never my intention.

300
00:15:56,748 --> 00:15:57,998
Well, that's what happened.

301
00:15:59,751 --> 00:16:00,841
Look.

302
00:16:02,629 --> 00:16:04,719
-I've changed, all right?
-[snickers]

303
00:16:09,595 --> 00:16:12,965
No, no. You haven't changed. No.

304
00:16:13,056 --> 00:16:15,016
You're gonna mess this one up
like you always do.

305
00:16:15,100 --> 00:16:17,560
You can't smoke in here.
It's not 2006.

306
00:16:25,819 --> 00:16:26,819
What?

307
00:16:30,490 --> 00:16:32,870
Bloody hell, she's doing it.

308
00:16:32,951 --> 00:16:34,701
[patrons laughing, talking]

309
00:16:34,786 --> 00:16:37,616
Peppers.
Peppers here are sensational.

310
00:16:37,706 --> 00:16:38,826
Mm.

311
00:16:38,916 --> 00:16:42,036
I mean, you wouldn't feed them to your dog
in Barcelona, but, uh, for here--

312
00:16:42,127 --> 00:16:43,957
[smacks lips] Muchas gracias.

313
00:16:44,463 --> 00:16:46,593
Oh, God. Can't eat all of those.

314
00:16:46,673 --> 00:16:48,723
-Well, I'll have yours.
-No, it's okay, I will.

315
00:16:48,800 --> 00:16:51,680
I'm a woman.
I just have to say that when food arrives.

316
00:16:51,762 --> 00:16:53,142
She's funny.

317
00:16:54,139 --> 00:16:57,889
And funny women, they're--
they're hard to find.

318
00:16:59,770 --> 00:17:00,600
Right.

319
00:17:01,480 --> 00:17:02,480
Toilet.

320
00:17:09,820 --> 00:17:11,410
God, I'm starving.

321
00:17:14,826 --> 00:17:16,866
Sorry, Karen.
Just give me two seconds.

322
00:17:25,587 --> 00:17:31,217
Um, okay, I just wanna say,
I think you've been pretty rude tonight.

323
00:17:31,301 --> 00:17:35,311
I know you know lots of things about lots
of things, but politeness costs nothing.

324
00:17:36,014 --> 00:17:37,314
Which is actually lucky for you,

325
00:17:37,391 --> 00:17:39,981
because you haven't had a job
in, like, six months.

326
00:17:40,060 --> 00:17:43,360
So maybe just have
a little think about that,

327
00:17:43,438 --> 00:17:46,478
and start treating my sister
with a bit more respect.

328
00:17:49,903 --> 00:17:52,993
And by the way,
you can't juggle work and a social life.

329
00:17:53,073 --> 00:17:56,703
That's two things.
That's the same number of things as hands.

330
00:17:56,785 --> 00:18:00,365
That's not juggling,
that's just holding things in your hands.

331
00:18:08,422 --> 00:18:09,972
-[Scott] Enjoy. Have a nice night.
-[man] Same to you.

332
00:18:25,230 --> 00:18:26,860
[Jane] You never answered my texts.

333
00:18:26,940 --> 00:18:29,780
[Jason] Well, there was a lot of them.
They were all in capitals.

334
00:18:29,860 --> 00:18:31,450
Yeah, well, I was angry.

335
00:18:31,528 --> 00:18:34,238
-You were always angry.
-I wonder why?

336
00:18:34,323 --> 00:18:35,703
It was all my fault, yeah.

337
00:18:35,782 --> 00:18:38,872
Well, I'm not angry at other people.

338
00:18:39,828 --> 00:18:41,998
I'm sorry.
You have to go outside to do that.

339
00:18:42,080 --> 00:18:44,210
-I am outside.
-You're inside.

340
00:18:44,291 --> 00:18:47,001
-Yeah, but my mouth is outside.
-A lot of the smoke's coming--

341
00:18:47,085 --> 00:18:50,415
You know what? I really feel like
this is a gray area, so...

342
00:19:07,689 --> 00:19:11,399
-[Karen] Right, then. See you soon.
-[Nikki] Okay.

343
00:19:12,152 --> 00:19:13,572
-Good luck.
-Thank you.

344
00:19:13,654 --> 00:19:14,954
So, when are you gonna hear back?

345
00:19:15,030 --> 00:19:17,450
We literally just posted it,
so I don't know.

346
00:19:18,534 --> 00:19:19,624
They're gonna love you.

347
00:19:20,994 --> 00:19:23,124
-You're brilliant.
-Oh.

348
00:19:23,205 --> 00:19:25,825
-Karen, that's so--
-Okay, I'll see you then.

349
00:19:25,916 --> 00:19:26,956
Okay.

350
00:19:27,709 --> 00:19:32,009
-Bye.
-[Karen] Oh, God. A baby. All right.

351
00:19:33,507 --> 00:19:34,507
Yeah.

352
00:19:35,467 --> 00:19:36,887
I am brilliant.

353
00:19:38,470 --> 00:19:39,890
-Hmm.
-[siren wailing]

354
00:19:50,315 --> 00:19:54,315
So, the Internet says that you're
in a relationship. Is that right?

355
00:19:54,403 --> 00:19:57,073
Yeah, you know,
I should update that, 'cause, um...

356
00:19:57,865 --> 00:20:00,655
Oh! He put a ring on it?

357
00:20:00,742 --> 00:20:02,492
-Yeah.
-Wow.

358
00:20:02,786 --> 00:20:06,826
Well, that's lovely.
That's really lovely. Lovely.

359
00:20:06,915 --> 00:20:08,875
What are you, um, doing now?

360
00:20:08,959 --> 00:20:11,089
-Still teaching English.
-At the language school?

361
00:20:11,170 --> 00:20:12,590
Yeah. Yeah.

362
00:20:12,671 --> 00:20:14,461
Wow. How long is this gap year
gonna last, Jason?

363
00:20:14,548 --> 00:20:15,968
[Jason laughs]

364
00:20:16,049 --> 00:20:18,259
Does that make enough money,
though, for kids?

365
00:20:18,343 --> 00:20:20,223
You know, we'll never be rich, but--

366
00:20:20,304 --> 00:20:22,644
Yeah, well, growing up rich ruins you.

367
00:20:22,723 --> 00:20:24,103
All the men cry after sex

368
00:20:24,183 --> 00:20:26,193
and all the women
have eating disorders, so...

369
00:20:28,478 --> 00:20:30,478
It's really nice to see you again, Jane.

370
00:20:31,315 --> 00:20:32,645
Yeah, you too.

371
00:20:32,733 --> 00:20:34,533
And I really have changed,
you know, honestly.

372
00:20:34,610 --> 00:20:37,360
In fact, today Nikki and I made a list

373
00:20:37,446 --> 00:20:39,446
of all the ways in which
we can improve ourselves.

374
00:20:39,531 --> 00:20:43,491
And you know you, um, always said
that I should get into mindfulness?

375
00:20:43,577 --> 00:20:46,707
Well, today I downloaded this app--

376
00:20:47,873 --> 00:20:50,753
What? Jane! Where you going?

377
00:20:51,460 --> 00:20:52,460
Jane!

378
00:20:55,047 --> 00:20:56,877
-Jane, wait! What?
-You! You!

379
00:20:57,591 --> 00:20:59,971
You are a real dick.

380
00:21:00,511 --> 00:21:02,551
-You know that?
-What? Why? Why?

381
00:21:02,638 --> 00:21:04,638
Do you know how hard it was
to be with you,

382
00:21:04,723 --> 00:21:07,393
-how impossible you were?
-I know, but I've just told you,

383
00:21:07,476 --> 00:21:10,016
-I'm a different person now.
-Yeah, of course you are.

384
00:21:10,103 --> 00:21:13,403
-You know, that's the worst part.
-I'm sorry. How's that?

385
00:21:13,482 --> 00:21:16,282
You're a better person
because you practiced on me.

386
00:21:17,110 --> 00:21:18,530
Yeah, but that wasn't my intention.

387
00:21:18,612 --> 00:21:20,412
-That's just life, isn't it?
-Oh, great.

388
00:21:20,489 --> 00:21:24,449
Well, I'm glad I was able to sacrifice
myself in the name of your self-discovery.

389
00:21:24,535 --> 00:21:26,535
You know,
I'm glad it wasn't all for nothing.

390
00:21:26,620 --> 00:21:29,040
So, you'd rather I was
the same old idiot I always used to be?

391
00:21:29,122 --> 00:21:30,212
Yes! Yes!

392
00:21:30,290 --> 00:21:32,500
Oh, my God!
That would be so much better.

393
00:21:33,585 --> 00:21:35,665
I know who that person was gonna be.

394
00:21:35,754 --> 00:21:39,054
You know, some sad, old,
secretary-shagging letdown.

395
00:21:39,466 --> 00:21:41,796
That would be fine.
I'd have dodged a bullet.

396
00:21:41,885 --> 00:21:44,805
But this? This is so much worse.

397
00:21:45,514 --> 00:21:46,604
But why?

398
00:21:47,850 --> 00:21:49,430
Because this is what I wanted.

399
00:21:51,812 --> 00:21:54,692
And it turns out
that you wanted what I wanted all along.

400
00:21:56,400 --> 00:21:57,570
Just not with me.

401
00:22:06,493 --> 00:22:09,833
Do you-- Do you know
what the most annoying thing is?

402
00:22:11,290 --> 00:22:13,500
You've become the person

403
00:22:14,334 --> 00:22:17,804
that you hated me for telling you
you could be.

404
00:22:22,176 --> 00:22:24,466
I mean, what did you even like about me?

405
00:22:30,392 --> 00:22:33,522
-Oh, my God, Jason. Think of one thing.
-I liked your strength.

406
00:22:33,604 --> 00:22:34,694
I liked your...

407
00:22:36,023 --> 00:22:37,023
your spirit.

408
00:22:38,358 --> 00:22:41,148
I liked your faith in people.

409
00:22:41,236 --> 00:22:43,696
I liked your laugh. I liked...

410
00:22:44,781 --> 00:22:47,031
I liked how I could always tell
that you were gonna make a joke

411
00:22:47,117 --> 00:22:48,657
'cause you got
the same little smile on your face.

412
00:22:48,744 --> 00:22:54,544
I liked how "MMMbop" was
the only Hanson song that you didn't like.

413
00:22:54,625 --> 00:22:58,295
I liked how you always said your name
when you answered your phone.

414
00:22:58,378 --> 00:23:00,458
-It's polite.
-It's a mobile.

415
00:23:00,547 --> 00:23:05,547
And I liked how you were genuinely happy
for other people.

416
00:23:07,137 --> 00:23:10,057
I liked lots of things, lots of things.

417
00:23:10,140 --> 00:23:13,060
And I'm really sorry
that you didn't know that.

418
00:23:18,023 --> 00:23:20,033
Didn't even need that much, you know?

419
00:23:21,109 --> 00:23:23,699
Just for you to hold my hand
every now and again.

420
00:23:23,779 --> 00:23:26,739
I know. I know.

421
00:23:29,368 --> 00:23:30,618
I have missed you.

422
00:23:32,579 --> 00:23:33,749
I missed you as well.

423
00:23:44,216 --> 00:23:45,426
[sighs]

424
00:23:46,510 --> 00:23:49,260
You can relax. I'm not gonna ruin
your chance to have a kid.

425
00:23:50,264 --> 00:23:52,064
I think you'd be a good dad.

426
00:23:52,140 --> 00:23:53,680
-Yeah?
-Yeah.

427
00:23:55,227 --> 00:23:57,307
Just, if you have a boy, Jason...

428
00:23:58,814 --> 00:24:01,154
just make sure
he doesn't grow up to be a dick.

429
00:24:02,901 --> 00:24:03,991
Do my best.

430
00:24:05,362 --> 00:24:06,362
Yeah.

431
00:24:09,825 --> 00:24:11,365
-[TV, indistinct]
-[door closes]

432
00:24:15,163 --> 00:24:16,163
Hiya.

433
00:24:16,665 --> 00:24:19,125
Mm. Hello.

434
00:24:19,751 --> 00:24:21,421
-All right?
-Yeah.

435
00:24:24,548 --> 00:24:28,178
Now, why do you smell
like booze and cigarettes?

436
00:24:29,094 --> 00:24:32,314
'Cause I met up with my ex,
and we spent the evening together.

437
00:24:32,389 --> 00:24:33,389
[Nikki snickers]

438
00:24:33,473 --> 00:24:36,233
[laughs] You're funny.

439
00:24:36,310 --> 00:24:38,310
[TV continues, indistinct]

440
00:24:42,983 --> 00:24:43,983
Ooh.

441
00:24:50,908 --> 00:24:52,618
[dog barking in distance]

442
00:24:54,203 --> 00:24:56,083
-Have you seen the list?
-[Nikki] What list?

443
00:24:56,163 --> 00:24:58,583
The list. You know, the one
with all of our issues on it.

444
00:24:58,665 --> 00:25:00,915
-I don't know.
-I want to pin it to the fridge,

445
00:25:01,001 --> 00:25:02,501
you know, to focus us.

446
00:25:02,586 --> 00:25:03,836
Table, maybe?

447
00:25:03,921 --> 00:25:05,511
No, I've looked on the table.
It's not there.

448
00:25:05,589 --> 00:25:06,719
[paper rustling]

449
00:25:06,798 --> 00:25:07,878
[Nikki sighs]

450
00:25:13,514 --> 00:25:15,854
I mean, yeah,
I definitely put it there.

451
00:25:20,521 --> 00:25:22,061
-You put it there?
-Yeah.

452
00:25:23,440 --> 00:25:25,820
It's just that's where
I picked up the form from.

453
00:25:29,154 --> 00:25:30,614
Did you write the list
on the back of the form?

454
00:25:30,697 --> 00:25:31,697
No.

455
00:25:34,368 --> 00:25:35,408
Hmm?

456
00:25:36,495 --> 00:25:38,365
-I mean, yeah.
-[paper rustling]

457
00:25:38,455 --> 00:25:40,115
It was-- It was thick. I thought it was--

458
00:25:40,207 --> 00:25:42,627
You know, we've got so much bits of paper
spread around everywhere.

459
00:25:42,709 --> 00:25:44,749
-Oh, my God.
-I like resting on loads of sheets.

460
00:25:44,837 --> 00:25:46,167
It makes my handwriting neater.

461
00:25:46,255 --> 00:25:47,415
-Shit!
-Shit! Shit! Shit!

462
00:25:47,506 --> 00:25:49,256
Why didn't you check
what you were writing on?

463
00:25:49,341 --> 00:25:52,011
I didn't think. Why did you
post a form with writing on the back?

464
00:25:52,094 --> 00:25:54,604
I didn't see it. You distracted me
spraying stuff all over it.

465
00:25:54,680 --> 00:25:58,060
We have sent an adoption agency
a list of all of our character flaws.

466
00:25:58,141 --> 00:25:59,521
It's all right.
We can just deny it was us.

467
00:25:59,601 --> 00:26:02,771
Jason, we literally signed our names
on the bottom of it!

468
00:26:09,653 --> 00:26:10,743
I'm cold.

469
00:26:11,530 --> 00:26:12,700
How long now?

470
00:26:14,992 --> 00:26:16,162
Shouldn't be too long.

471
00:26:16,952 --> 00:26:18,202
[sighs]

472
00:26:32,259 --> 00:26:34,929
Bye. I'm off. Okay.

473
00:26:38,682 --> 00:26:39,682
Oi.

474
00:26:45,856 --> 00:26:47,936
-[muttering]
-[bottles clinking]

475
00:26:49,985 --> 00:26:51,065
That's it.

476
00:26:51,153 --> 00:26:52,703
Here we go. Up, yeah.

477
00:26:53,280 --> 00:26:54,280
There now.

478
00:26:58,035 --> 00:26:59,035
[door closes]

479
00:26:59,119 --> 00:27:03,459
♪ And all of the others
Cancel out each other ♪

480
00:27:03,540 --> 00:27:06,590
♪ And it's always you left ♪

481
00:27:06,668 --> 00:27:12,418
♪ But you were my no sleep
Cried for weeks ♪

482
00:27:12,508 --> 00:27:15,008
♪ Favourite ex ♪

483
00:27:15,093 --> 00:27:16,643
[sighs]

484
00:27:19,598 --> 00:27:21,388
-Now, let me do the talking.
-Okay.

485
00:27:38,659 --> 00:27:41,409
Oh, shit.

486
00:27:43,455 --> 00:27:44,615
[sighs]