1 00:00:02,745 --> 00:00:04,728 ♪ Kentucky bourbon flight ♪ 2 00:00:04,747 --> 00:00:06,246 -♪ Kentuck... Kentuck... ♪ -(yawns) Hey. 3 00:00:06,340 --> 00:00:08,248 Oh, hey, sorry, did I wake you? 4 00:00:08,400 --> 00:00:11,159 (yawns) No. Snowball either puked up her dinner, 5 00:00:11,178 --> 00:00:13,754 or she's going through a Jackson Pollock phase. 6 00:00:13,906 --> 00:00:16,164 Well, at least it wasn't in my slippers this time. 7 00:00:16,258 --> 00:00:19,576 That was a squishy 2:00 a.m. trip to the bathroom. 8 00:00:19,595 --> 00:00:21,169 What were you playing? 9 00:00:21,263 --> 00:00:22,412 Oh, a song I'm working on. 10 00:00:22,431 --> 00:00:24,097 I want something new for when that producer 11 00:00:24,174 --> 00:00:25,415 comes to see me play. 12 00:00:25,434 --> 00:00:26,600 Well, if you need a beatboxer, 13 00:00:26,752 --> 00:00:28,435 I just finished Doug E. Fresh's MasterClass. 14 00:00:28,529 --> 00:00:30,587 -(beatboxing) -Oh. 15 00:00:30,680 --> 00:00:32,180 That was on there? (groans) 16 00:00:32,199 --> 00:00:35,092 And I wasted three hours listening to Melinda Gates 17 00:00:35,110 --> 00:00:37,369 teach me about impactful giving. 18 00:00:37,596 --> 00:00:39,020 Play your song for me. 19 00:00:39,114 --> 00:00:41,431 -It's not done. I don't... -Oh, come on. 20 00:00:41,450 --> 00:00:42,857 I mean, if you get stuck on a rhyme, 21 00:00:42,951 --> 00:00:44,268 I'm pretty good. 22 00:00:44,436 --> 00:00:45,786 Salad, valid. 23 00:00:45,938 --> 00:00:48,288 I was saving it for a birthday card, but you can have it. 24 00:00:48,440 --> 00:00:49,790 (laughs) 25 00:00:49,884 --> 00:00:52,885 Okay, all right. (stammers) It's a work in progress, though. 26 00:00:53,112 --> 00:00:54,553 (clears throat) 27 00:00:59,118 --> 00:01:02,286 ♪ A friend from way back when ♪ 28 00:01:02,304 --> 00:01:04,971 ♪ Who came around again ♪ 29 00:01:05,124 --> 00:01:08,216 ♪ I can't believe it took so long ♪ 30 00:01:08,235 --> 00:01:11,070 ♪ But you were worth ♪ 31 00:01:11,297 --> 00:01:12,629 ♪ The wait.... ♪ 32 00:01:12,722 --> 00:01:16,316 I'm a friend from way back when. Is this song about me? 33 00:01:16,468 --> 00:01:18,059 My mother says I wasn't worth the wait, 34 00:01:18,153 --> 00:01:19,820 but maybe Max disagrees. 35 00:01:19,972 --> 00:01:22,915 ♪ Tousled hair and shining eyes ♪ 36 00:01:23,066 --> 00:01:25,918 ♪ Couldn't lose me if you tried ♪ 37 00:01:26,111 --> 00:01:29,313 ♪ I look at you, and I'm at home ♪ 38 00:01:29,331 --> 00:01:32,332 ♪ 'Cause you were worth ♪ 39 00:01:32,426 --> 00:01:33,650 ♪ The wait ♪ 40 00:01:33,743 --> 00:01:35,502 My hair's always tousled. 41 00:01:35,654 --> 00:01:38,839 I haven't gotten a comb through this thing in years. 42 00:01:38,933 --> 00:01:41,249 ♪ Karaoke nights ♪ 43 00:01:41,268 --> 00:01:44,103 ♪ Kentucky bourbon flights ♪ 44 00:01:44,330 --> 00:01:46,163 ♪ Singin' Billy Joel ♪ 45 00:01:46,181 --> 00:01:49,775 ♪ Until we saw the dawn ♪ 46 00:01:49,926 --> 00:01:53,170 ♪ 'Cause you were worth ♪ 47 00:01:53,263 --> 00:01:54,446 ♪ The wait. ♪ 48 00:01:54,598 --> 00:01:57,432 Okay, that's me because that happened. 49 00:01:57,526 --> 00:01:59,618 Move over, "Layla" and "Billie Jean," 50 00:01:59,769 --> 00:02:02,529 I just got my own song. 51 00:02:03,682 --> 00:02:05,849 (sighs) That's as far as I've gotten so far. 52 00:02:05,868 --> 00:02:07,459 -That is amazing. -Mm-hmm. 53 00:02:07,611 --> 00:02:09,461 You painted such a vivid picture, 54 00:02:09,688 --> 00:02:11,463 I felt like I was there. 55 00:02:11,615 --> 00:02:13,507 Because I was. 56 00:02:14,376 --> 00:02:16,193 Well, it's got a long way to go, 57 00:02:16,286 --> 00:02:18,362 but I'm glad you like it. 58 00:02:18,380 --> 00:02:20,097 I love it. 59 00:02:25,479 --> 00:02:26,794 -Hey, um... -Mm? 60 00:02:26,889 --> 00:02:28,205 Since we're both up, you, uh, 61 00:02:28,223 --> 00:02:29,481 want to have a little fun on the couch? 62 00:02:29,633 --> 00:02:32,058 Oh, fun on the couch, I like the sound of that. 63 00:02:32,135 --> 00:02:33,801 Yeah? Do you like the sound of this? 64 00:02:33,896 --> 00:02:36,638 -(beatboxing) -Oh. 65 00:02:36,732 --> 00:02:38,139 ♪ Me, oh, my, oh, my, oh, me ♪ 66 00:02:38,233 --> 00:02:40,617 ♪ Nothin' wrong with you but I'd rather be me. ♪ 67 00:02:41,495 --> 00:02:42,494 -Hi. -Hi. 68 00:02:42,646 --> 00:02:45,313 I can't help but notice you've bonded 69 00:02:45,407 --> 00:02:46,981 with Meow-im Bialik. (laughs) 70 00:02:47,001 --> 00:02:50,294 What can I say, I lost a bet to the writers. 71 00:02:51,079 --> 00:02:52,654 Just so you know, 72 00:02:52,748 --> 00:02:55,156 all of our cats are available for rescue. 73 00:02:55,176 --> 00:02:57,158 If you're interested, 74 00:02:57,252 --> 00:02:58,677 just fill out this application 75 00:02:58,846 --> 00:03:00,679 and answer a few simple questions. 76 00:03:00,848 --> 00:03:02,406 Great, I'd love to. 77 00:03:02,499 --> 00:03:04,666 Your cat spends the morning on a carefree frolic in the garden. 78 00:03:04,685 --> 00:03:05,759 Later, you notice red hives 79 00:03:05,853 --> 00:03:07,427 on its belly. What do you do? 80 00:03:07,579 --> 00:03:09,229 What do you do?! 81 00:03:10,098 --> 00:03:11,264 Take her to the vet? 82 00:03:11,358 --> 00:03:12,249 Good answer. 83 00:03:12,267 --> 00:03:13,934 Sorry I got all up in your face. 84 00:03:14,010 --> 00:03:16,195 I just wanted to simulate the high-intensity experience 85 00:03:16,363 --> 00:03:17,921 of cat ownership. You did great. 86 00:03:17,923 --> 00:03:19,606 There's a box you can check for 87 00:03:19,683 --> 00:03:21,849 "don't want to talk to this one again." 88 00:03:22,761 --> 00:03:25,186 Go ahead and try and bring me down, but, uh, 89 00:03:25,280 --> 00:03:27,522 my boyfriend is writing a song about me. 90 00:03:27,616 --> 00:03:30,617 Really? What did he rhyme with "settling"? 91 00:03:30,694 --> 00:03:33,045 Hey, guys. Sorry I'm late. 92 00:03:33,196 --> 00:03:34,862 Carter's son is coming over for the weekend, 93 00:03:34,957 --> 00:03:36,289 so I went out and bought a bunch of things 94 00:03:36,442 --> 00:03:37,941 I thought a 14-year-old boy might like. 95 00:03:38,034 --> 00:03:39,626 I didn't know the grocery store sold 96 00:03:39,778 --> 00:03:41,703 marijuana and boobs. 97 00:03:41,797 --> 00:03:43,388 I'm gonna be his stepmom soon, 98 00:03:43,540 --> 00:03:45,206 so I want him to come over and have fun, 99 00:03:45,226 --> 00:03:47,300 and then go home and tell his mom that he likes me more 100 00:03:47,453 --> 00:03:48,952 and that I'm prettier. 101 00:03:48,971 --> 00:03:52,456 Well, if you want, I can help you put the "step" in stepmom. 102 00:03:52,474 --> 00:03:54,691 (grunting) 103 00:03:56,570 --> 00:03:58,128 (grunts) 104 00:03:59,131 --> 00:04:02,241 February was Black History Month on MasterClass. 105 00:04:02,392 --> 00:04:03,992 (grunts) 106 00:04:06,822 --> 00:04:08,472 -Hey, Randi. -Hey, baby. 107 00:04:08,490 --> 00:04:10,307 Little man. 108 00:04:10,400 --> 00:04:12,567 All right, I'm loving this. 109 00:04:12,644 --> 00:04:14,327 Wow, okay, still going. 110 00:04:14,480 --> 00:04:15,645 Yeah, okay, 111 00:04:15,664 --> 00:04:16,813 not feeling left out at all. 112 00:04:16,832 --> 00:04:19,675 Starting to feel a little left out. 113 00:04:20,986 --> 00:04:22,577 CJ, I got all your favorite foods. 114 00:04:22,596 --> 00:04:24,488 I got chicken nuggets, chicken fingers, 115 00:04:24,581 --> 00:04:25,747 chicken patties, 116 00:04:25,841 --> 00:04:27,248 and something called Beyond Chicken 117 00:04:27,268 --> 00:04:28,658 that they said tastes like real chicken, 118 00:04:28,677 --> 00:04:30,385 but it really doesn't taste like chicken. 119 00:04:30,512 --> 00:04:33,105 Just eat your broccoli and be sad, vegans. 120 00:04:33,332 --> 00:04:34,998 I was kind of feeling Taco Bell. 121 00:04:35,017 --> 00:04:36,683 Oh, tacos are cool, too. Let's go. 122 00:04:36,760 --> 00:04:39,594 Uh, hold up. Now, I love Taco Bell just as much as anyone. 123 00:04:39,613 --> 00:04:42,430 In fact, I'm the one who got the Mexican Pizza back on the menu. 124 00:04:42,524 --> 00:04:44,190 My grandfather marched on Washington, 125 00:04:44,343 --> 00:04:45,600 I marched on Chalupa Boulevard. 126 00:04:45,619 --> 00:04:48,954 But Randi bought 200 bucks worth of groceries, 127 00:04:49,123 --> 00:04:50,938 so we're eating here. 128 00:04:50,958 --> 00:04:53,775 -Fine. -Buzzkill. He always buzzkilling. 129 00:04:53,794 --> 00:04:56,295 Oh, no, no, I'm a part of this one. 130 00:04:56,522 --> 00:04:58,297 (laughs) 131 00:04:58,524 --> 00:05:00,373 Yeah. Uh-uh-uh. 132 00:05:00,526 --> 00:05:02,526 Okay, which one's the producer? 133 00:05:02,544 --> 00:05:04,377 Oh, it's the guy in the cowboy hat, isn't it? 134 00:05:04,454 --> 00:05:06,046 (country accent): Sure do like your songs, Max. 135 00:05:06,198 --> 00:05:08,031 I understand your pretty little filly here 136 00:05:08,050 --> 00:05:09,549 does a mean beatbox. (laughs) 137 00:05:09,718 --> 00:05:11,217 It's actually Kelsey Morgan, 138 00:05:11,312 --> 00:05:13,053 the woman in the pantsuit. 139 00:05:13,205 --> 00:05:14,704 Ugh, damn the patriarchy. 140 00:05:14,723 --> 00:05:17,574 -I've got so much to unlearn. -(chuckles) 141 00:05:17,576 --> 00:05:18,984 I'm gonna take my seat. 142 00:05:19,135 --> 00:05:21,061 -Wish me luck. -Break a leg. And if you get nervous, 143 00:05:21,229 --> 00:05:22,487 just picture the audience naked, 144 00:05:22,639 --> 00:05:24,990 except Randi, I can't compete with that. 145 00:05:26,493 --> 00:05:27,475 You got this, brother. 146 00:05:27,569 --> 00:05:29,745 (laughs) Yes. 147 00:05:32,148 --> 00:05:34,407 Everyone has one but me. 148 00:05:34,560 --> 00:05:36,668 Thanks for coming out. Where's CJ? 149 00:05:36,895 --> 00:05:38,228 At a movie with a friend. 150 00:05:38,230 --> 00:05:40,413 It's rated R, but I taught him how to buy a ticket 151 00:05:40,566 --> 00:05:41,915 for another movie and sneak in. 152 00:05:42,067 --> 00:05:44,992 Who's the best stepmom now, Gabrielle Union? 153 00:05:45,012 --> 00:05:46,178 (laughs) 154 00:05:46,405 --> 00:05:48,088 Hey, everybody, I'm Max Kingbird. 155 00:05:48,215 --> 00:05:49,831 Uh, so glad to be here. 156 00:05:49,850 --> 00:05:51,999 I'm gonna start with something new. 157 00:05:52,094 --> 00:05:55,354 Uh, it's a little different, but very personal to me. 158 00:05:55,581 --> 00:05:57,171 -This is it. This is my song. -(guitar playing) 159 00:05:57,265 --> 00:05:59,524 I'm the "person" in "personal." 160 00:06:01,420 --> 00:06:04,846 ♪ A friend from way back when ♪ 161 00:06:04,865 --> 00:06:07,257 ♪ Who came around again ♪ 162 00:06:07,275 --> 00:06:10,443 ♪ I can't believe it took so long ♪ 163 00:06:10,596 --> 00:06:14,539 ♪ But you were worth the wait... ♪ 164 00:06:14,766 --> 00:06:16,449 Wow, this is beautiful. 165 00:06:16,526 --> 00:06:17,784 Don't be jealous. 166 00:06:17,878 --> 00:06:19,436 Just kidding, be totally jealous. 167 00:06:19,529 --> 00:06:22,363 ♪ Up all night we drank champagne ♪ 168 00:06:22,457 --> 00:06:25,458 ♪ Dancin' in the Paris rain ♪ 169 00:06:25,627 --> 00:06:28,703 ♪ You're the reason, ma cherie ♪ 170 00:06:28,797 --> 00:06:32,206 ♪ But you were worth the wait ♪ 171 00:06:32,300 --> 00:06:34,134 When did you guys go to Paris? 172 00:06:34,286 --> 00:06:35,619 Uh, we didn't, but, 173 00:06:35,637 --> 00:06:36,970 you know, uh... 174 00:06:37,139 --> 00:06:39,806 (French accent): Louisville is the "Par-ee" of Kentucky. 175 00:06:39,900 --> 00:06:40,882 (laughs) 176 00:06:40,901 --> 00:06:43,293 ♪ I want to hold you near ♪ 177 00:06:43,386 --> 00:06:45,887 ♪ Whisper "je t'aime" in your ear... ♪ 178 00:06:45,981 --> 00:06:48,407 You don't speak French. I know 179 00:06:48,558 --> 00:06:50,634 because in high school you insisted 180 00:06:50,636 --> 00:06:53,161 on taking Klingon instead. 181 00:06:55,991 --> 00:06:57,307 ♪ Takin' off our clothes ♪ 182 00:06:57,400 --> 00:07:00,660 ♪ In Fontaine Saint-Michel ♪ 183 00:07:00,829 --> 00:07:04,756 ♪ My sexy mademoiselle... ♪ 184 00:07:04,908 --> 00:07:06,240 Huh... 185 00:07:06,260 --> 00:07:08,168 We never went skinny-dipping. 186 00:07:08,262 --> 00:07:11,012 It's because this song is about me. 187 00:07:11,840 --> 00:07:12,597 Brigitte? 188 00:07:12,824 --> 00:07:13,506 Oui. 189 00:07:13,600 --> 00:07:15,175 When Max and I were together, 190 00:07:15,343 --> 00:07:16,843 we skinny-dipped all the time. 191 00:07:16,995 --> 00:07:19,679 In Saint-Tropez, in Rome, at Normandy. 192 00:07:19,831 --> 00:07:22,649 It was a different kind of D-Day. 193 00:07:35,622 --> 00:07:37,514 I eat lots of ice cream, 194 00:07:37,532 --> 00:07:40,292 but I'm still very thin. 195 00:07:40,443 --> 00:07:42,610 Yeah, well, I don't gain weight from it either 196 00:07:42,629 --> 00:07:44,445 'cause I'm lactose intolerant. 197 00:07:44,465 --> 00:07:45,780 (door opens) 198 00:07:45,799 --> 00:07:48,467 You're not gonna believe it. I talked to Kelsey, 199 00:07:48,618 --> 00:07:51,970 and she wants to record with me. (laughs) 200 00:07:52,121 --> 00:07:53,713 Why aren't you jumping up and down with me? 201 00:07:53,865 --> 00:07:56,975 It's weird for a grown man to be jumping up and down by himself. 202 00:07:58,312 --> 00:08:00,720 Max, why did you change the song you wrote about me 203 00:08:00,872 --> 00:08:01,813 to be about Brigitte? 204 00:08:01,965 --> 00:08:04,374 Oh, Kat, I think we both know why. 205 00:08:05,060 --> 00:08:08,010 The song's not about anyone specifically. I just made it up. 206 00:08:08,137 --> 00:08:10,213 Oh, so you didn't go skinny-dipping with Brigitte 207 00:08:10,232 --> 00:08:11,973 in La Fontaine Saint-Michel? 208 00:08:12,034 --> 00:08:14,400 I think you're focusing on the wrong thing here. 209 00:08:14,553 --> 00:08:16,495 Kelsey Morgan is working on songs 210 00:08:16,646 --> 00:08:18,479 for Chris Stapleton's next album. 211 00:08:18,499 --> 00:08:20,499 Can't you just be excited for me? 212 00:08:20,667 --> 00:08:21,983 Well, it's kind of hard to be excited 213 00:08:22,002 --> 00:08:23,409 when you started writing a song about me 214 00:08:23,562 --> 00:08:26,153 and ran out of things to say 20 seconds in. 215 00:08:26,173 --> 00:08:27,580 And what would he say? 216 00:08:27,733 --> 00:08:31,343 "Oh, Kat, I love your fruit with the googly eyes"? 217 00:08:31,494 --> 00:08:33,086 I was so excited to tell you my good news, 218 00:08:33,238 --> 00:08:35,680 and you're kind of crapping all over it. 219 00:08:35,907 --> 00:08:38,475 It is because she ate ice cream. 220 00:08:41,504 --> 00:08:44,748 Yes! Winner, winner, chicken dinner. 221 00:08:44,750 --> 00:08:46,249 And breakfast and lunch. 222 00:08:46,268 --> 00:08:47,859 Seriously, y'all, I bought a buttload of chicken. 223 00:08:48,028 --> 00:08:51,679 All right, Junior, time for bed. It's a school night. 224 00:08:51,773 --> 00:08:53,198 Aw, give him a break. 225 00:08:53,349 --> 00:08:55,942 I've been taking him to school these last six games. 226 00:08:56,094 --> 00:08:57,869 Oh, it's on. 227 00:08:58,021 --> 00:09:00,021 No, it's off. 228 00:09:00,115 --> 00:09:02,115 -Aw, man. -Boo. 229 00:09:02,267 --> 00:09:03,375 Night, little man. 230 00:09:03,526 --> 00:09:04,859 You might want to sleep on your stomach 231 00:09:04,878 --> 00:09:07,103 after that spanking I just gave you. 232 00:09:07,122 --> 00:09:08,454 What are you doing? 233 00:09:08,607 --> 00:09:11,198 -What are you talking about? -Last night with dinner, 234 00:09:11,218 --> 00:09:12,458 tonight with video games, 235 00:09:12,611 --> 00:09:14,127 you keep making me the bad cop with CJ. 236 00:09:14,279 --> 00:09:16,112 I'm trying to be Chris Tucker in Rush Hour, 237 00:09:16,131 --> 00:09:18,782 you got me looking like Denzel in Training Day. 238 00:09:18,800 --> 00:09:20,800 Well, what's the big deal if I want to spoil him a little? 239 00:09:20,952 --> 00:09:23,469 I want him to know that he's gonna have a cool stepmom. 240 00:09:23,564 --> 00:09:25,397 But that means I have to be the hard-ass, 241 00:09:25,473 --> 00:09:27,974 and that's his mom's job. She's Denzel. 242 00:09:28,068 --> 00:09:32,529 Trust me, King Kong ain't got nothing on her! 243 00:09:33,723 --> 00:09:35,481 SHEILA: Hello, dear. 244 00:09:35,634 --> 00:09:37,576 What are you doing here? 245 00:09:37,761 --> 00:09:39,411 You can't get rid of any more of my clothes. 246 00:09:39,562 --> 00:09:41,580 I never even got to wear those orange Crocs. 247 00:09:41,807 --> 00:09:44,657 I know you had a rough night, so I brought some Chardonnay. 248 00:09:44,826 --> 00:09:47,234 You do realize it's noon? 249 00:09:47,312 --> 00:09:50,404 I know, I'm sorry. I slept in this morning. 250 00:09:50,498 --> 00:09:52,165 How you doing? 251 00:09:52,259 --> 00:09:53,666 Oh, great. 252 00:09:53,819 --> 00:09:56,744 My boyfriend wrote a song about his perfect ex-girlfriend, 253 00:09:56,838 --> 00:09:57,912 and I'm having full-fledged 254 00:09:57,931 --> 00:09:59,747 imaginary conversations with her. 255 00:09:59,766 --> 00:10:01,341 It is torturous for me, too. 256 00:10:01,435 --> 00:10:04,102 I look this good, and no one else can see me. 257 00:10:04,329 --> 00:10:07,997 As you know, I've had a tune or two written about me. 258 00:10:08,016 --> 00:10:09,999 I was there the morning Lionel Richie 259 00:10:10,093 --> 00:10:11,276 wrote "All Night Long." 260 00:10:11,353 --> 00:10:12,777 And...? 261 00:10:12,929 --> 00:10:16,097 And nothing. It's just hard to work that into conversations. 262 00:10:16,116 --> 00:10:19,100 Max says this is just the way he writes, 263 00:10:19,119 --> 00:10:20,285 but I can't shake the feeling 264 00:10:20,436 --> 00:10:22,120 that he'd rather be with Brigitte. 265 00:10:22,271 --> 00:10:23,529 How can you blame him? 266 00:10:23,698 --> 00:10:27,241 He's riding the tea cups after le Splash Mountain. 267 00:10:28,203 --> 00:10:30,629 Sweetheart, he's lucky to have you. 268 00:10:30,780 --> 00:10:32,538 You're generous and thoughtful 269 00:10:32,633 --> 00:10:34,115 and loving. 270 00:10:34,134 --> 00:10:35,541 But that's boring. 271 00:10:35,694 --> 00:10:38,378 I want to be sexy and fun and adventurous. 272 00:10:38,472 --> 00:10:41,547 Well, if you want to inspire him, 273 00:10:41,700 --> 00:10:43,475 lean into your wild side. 274 00:10:43,668 --> 00:10:44,959 Do something daring 275 00:10:44,978 --> 00:10:46,536 and a little reckless. 276 00:10:46,554 --> 00:10:49,630 Ooh, like Olivia Newton-John at the end of Grease. 277 00:10:49,724 --> 00:10:52,466 She got a perm, put on those tight leather pants, 278 00:10:52,544 --> 00:10:54,043 and rode off in a convertible. 279 00:10:54,062 --> 00:10:55,636 That's a wild girl car. 280 00:10:55,805 --> 00:10:59,549 I was thinking a drug-fueled weekend in Vegas with you, Max, 281 00:10:59,567 --> 00:11:03,403 and an open-minded Cirque du Soleil acrobat, 282 00:11:03,555 --> 00:11:04,996 but you do you. 283 00:11:08,818 --> 00:11:10,076 Ooh, grab a controller. 284 00:11:10,170 --> 00:11:12,745 Can't. I'm meeting a friend at the library to study. 285 00:11:12,839 --> 00:11:14,506 How are you supposed to get better at video games 286 00:11:14,733 --> 00:11:17,233 if you keep going to the library on a Saturday? 287 00:11:17,252 --> 00:11:19,678 See, this is why China is kicking our ass. 288 00:11:19,829 --> 00:11:21,680 I've got a project. 289 00:11:21,831 --> 00:11:22,588 Okay. 290 00:11:22,683 --> 00:11:23,831 (bottles clinking) 291 00:11:24,000 --> 00:11:26,351 Wait, what's clinking around in your backpack? 292 00:11:26,502 --> 00:11:27,668 Nothing. 293 00:11:27,688 --> 00:11:29,262 Boy, I'm from Detroit, 294 00:11:29,414 --> 00:11:32,524 smuggling beer in a backpack is called a Motown Special. 295 00:11:32,600 --> 00:11:34,359 Wh... 296 00:11:34,510 --> 00:11:35,768 What is wrong with you? 297 00:11:35,921 --> 00:11:37,937 They weren't for me. My friend Preston wanted them, 298 00:11:38,031 --> 00:11:40,106 but if he's pressuring me to drink, 299 00:11:40,258 --> 00:11:42,258 I see now he's not a real friend at all. 300 00:11:42,351 --> 00:11:44,610 Save that weak-ass line for your dad. 301 00:11:44,763 --> 00:11:47,280 -Oh, what? You're gonna tell him? -Of course I am. 302 00:11:47,432 --> 00:11:49,098 If I told him that Drake slid into my DMs, 303 00:11:49,233 --> 00:11:50,283 I'm gonna tell him this. 304 00:11:50,452 --> 00:11:51,859 -But Randi... -Uh-uh, go to your room 305 00:11:51,878 --> 00:11:54,528 or time-out or whatever that crap is that parents say. 306 00:11:54,622 --> 00:11:56,606 If you tell my dad, then he's gonna tell my mom, 307 00:11:56,624 --> 00:11:57,549 and she's gonna go nuts. 308 00:11:57,700 --> 00:11:58,775 (sighs) 309 00:11:58,868 --> 00:12:00,944 I guess you're not as cool as I thought. 310 00:12:00,962 --> 00:12:01,886 CJ... 311 00:12:02,113 --> 00:12:03,555 Whatever. 312 00:12:06,042 --> 00:12:08,709 Okay, fine, fine. I won't tell him. 313 00:12:08,729 --> 00:12:10,286 Seriously? You're the best. 314 00:12:10,379 --> 00:12:12,972 I know. I know. Just make sure your mom knows, too. 315 00:12:13,066 --> 00:12:14,807 And if you could somehow work into the conversation 316 00:12:14,901 --> 00:12:16,793 that I know Drake, even better. 317 00:12:16,811 --> 00:12:19,904 I will. Thank you so much. 318 00:12:20,741 --> 00:12:24,617 And just so you know, you wrap the bottles in a towel, fool. 319 00:12:27,305 --> 00:12:30,064 Is it hot in here or is it just me? 320 00:12:30,158 --> 00:12:32,417 Trick question, it's both. 321 00:12:33,828 --> 00:12:35,754 Hey. Whoa, you look amazing. 322 00:12:35,905 --> 00:12:37,146 Ooh, 323 00:12:37,165 --> 00:12:38,998 sex candles. Race you to naked. 324 00:12:39,150 --> 00:12:40,500 This counts as foreplay. 325 00:12:40,652 --> 00:12:43,152 -No, no, no, no. Not yet. We'll get there. -Oh. Oh... 326 00:12:43,171 --> 00:12:45,004 Because it's our anniversary 327 00:12:45,098 --> 00:12:47,599 that I did not forget. 328 00:12:47,750 --> 00:12:50,417 I ordered your gift, but, you know, supply chain. 329 00:12:50,495 --> 00:12:53,087 Well, it's not our anniversary. 330 00:12:53,106 --> 00:12:55,515 I wanted to do something to celebrate your good news 331 00:12:55,667 --> 00:12:57,275 about the producer with a romantic night 332 00:12:57,426 --> 00:12:59,018 of spontaneous adventure where 333 00:12:59,170 --> 00:13:01,279 -anything can happen. -Aw, cool. 334 00:13:01,430 --> 00:13:03,281 -Well, we could go b... -No, no, no, no, 335 00:13:03,508 --> 00:13:05,008 a romantic night of spontaneous adventure 336 00:13:05,101 --> 00:13:06,451 that I have completely planned out. 337 00:13:06,602 --> 00:13:09,195 A real adventure or a Kat adventure? 338 00:13:09,289 --> 00:13:10,847 Because a Kat adventure always means 339 00:13:10,849 --> 00:13:14,017 I have to look up words I don't know, like ornithology. 340 00:13:14,110 --> 00:13:15,943 Just say we're going bird-watching, 341 00:13:15,962 --> 00:13:17,444 so I can get high first. 342 00:13:17,464 --> 00:13:20,023 Well, tonight, we're gonna get high 343 00:13:20,116 --> 00:13:22,634 on excitement and temerity. 344 00:13:23,878 --> 00:13:25,211 It means recklessness. 345 00:13:25,363 --> 00:13:28,765 Now, go put on some clothes for getting cr-azy. 346 00:13:29,976 --> 00:13:32,385 You really think you can compete with me? 347 00:13:33,146 --> 00:13:36,481 After tonight, Max will be so inspired by me, 348 00:13:36,708 --> 00:13:38,708 he will never think of you again. 349 00:13:38,801 --> 00:13:40,109 So... 350 00:13:43,898 --> 00:13:46,074 Step off. 351 00:13:54,150 --> 00:13:56,576 Okay, here we are. 352 00:13:56,670 --> 00:13:58,169 Okay, get ready. 353 00:13:58,362 --> 00:14:00,730 One... 354 00:14:00,748 --> 00:14:02,081 -two. I did it on two. -Whoa. 355 00:14:02,250 --> 00:14:04,250 Temerity. (laughs) 356 00:14:04,344 --> 00:14:05,902 Water tower? 357 00:14:05,995 --> 00:14:08,495 -You gonna whack me? -No. 358 00:14:08,515 --> 00:14:11,257 We're gonna sneak in this locked gate. 359 00:14:11,409 --> 00:14:14,243 Uh, whoa, rebellious much? 360 00:14:14,262 --> 00:14:17,430 Climb this bad boy, take in a spectacular view, 361 00:14:17,582 --> 00:14:19,582 and then write our names on a little heart 362 00:14:19,601 --> 00:14:20,841 for all the world to see. 363 00:14:20,935 --> 00:14:23,119 You're not exactly dressed for climbing. 364 00:14:23,179 --> 00:14:25,846 Hey, if my mother can do a 5K walk in heels 365 00:14:25,940 --> 00:14:27,699 to support bringing back quaaludes, 366 00:14:27,926 --> 00:14:29,442 I can climb this water tower. 367 00:14:29,594 --> 00:14:31,761 Right. 368 00:14:31,854 --> 00:14:34,188 Just get in here like this. 369 00:14:34,207 --> 00:14:36,190 -Here we go. Oh! -Oh. 370 00:14:36,209 --> 00:14:38,376 Uh-oh. Ow. Uh, my hair's caught. 371 00:14:38,527 --> 00:14:40,712 Well, not my hair, my extensions. 372 00:14:40,863 --> 00:14:42,363 They're polyester like my dress. 373 00:14:42,382 --> 00:14:44,531 I guess my theme tonight is "flammable." (laughs) 374 00:14:44,551 --> 00:14:47,051 -I got you. Ready? -(stammers) Ow! Ow. No. Ow. 375 00:14:47,278 --> 00:14:48,945 That's actually making it worse. Let me just-- I got it. 376 00:14:48,963 --> 00:14:51,280 -Okay? Just let me get it. -Okay. 377 00:14:51,299 --> 00:14:52,298 Ow. Ah. 378 00:14:52,392 --> 00:14:53,725 (screams) 379 00:14:55,729 --> 00:14:57,896 Oh, my God, are you okay? 380 00:14:58,047 --> 00:14:59,305 I'm good. 381 00:14:59,457 --> 00:15:02,025 What a spontaneous moment. 382 00:15:02,961 --> 00:15:05,128 All right, let me just, uh, 383 00:15:05,146 --> 00:15:07,554 let me just wipe my hands off on this garbage 384 00:15:07,723 --> 00:15:08,648 and then the, uh, 385 00:15:08,800 --> 00:15:11,200 the fun will begin. (laughs) 386 00:15:13,729 --> 00:15:14,987 -Hey, baby. -Hey. 387 00:15:15,140 --> 00:15:18,324 Guess who ate 76 olives in under a minute? 388 00:15:18,476 --> 00:15:20,309 I don't know, but he sounds like an idiot. 389 00:15:20,403 --> 00:15:22,645 Yeah, yeah, that Darren. (laughs) 390 00:15:22,664 --> 00:15:24,313 He sure is stupid. 391 00:15:24,407 --> 00:15:26,090 Hey, I was thinking, uh, tomorrow, 392 00:15:26,317 --> 00:15:27,442 we take CJ to Dave & Buster's. 393 00:15:27,444 --> 00:15:29,576 Seal the deal that you the coolest stepmom. 394 00:15:29,596 --> 00:15:32,488 S-So, listen, something happened earlier, 395 00:15:32,548 --> 00:15:35,099 and I felt like I did the right thing at the time, 396 00:15:35,326 --> 00:15:38,752 but... now I kind of feel like I should tell you about it. 397 00:15:38,846 --> 00:15:41,013 Damn it, is Drake's light-skinned ass 398 00:15:41,166 --> 00:15:42,589 texting you again? 399 00:15:42,684 --> 00:15:44,943 It's not that. 400 00:15:45,094 --> 00:15:47,928 -I caught CJ stealing beer. -What? 401 00:15:47,948 --> 00:15:49,280 But I promised him that I wouldn't tell, 402 00:15:49,507 --> 00:15:50,281 so you can't do anything about it. 403 00:15:50,508 --> 00:15:51,932 He stole a bottle of my beer, 404 00:15:52,026 --> 00:15:54,010 I'm gonna open up a can of my whoop-ass. 405 00:15:54,028 --> 00:15:55,678 But if you snitch on me being a snitch 406 00:15:55,697 --> 00:15:57,146 then we both gonna get stitches, 407 00:15:57,148 --> 00:15:59,348 and it's a new year, so I know you're not even close 408 00:15:59,367 --> 00:16:00,700 to fulfilling your deductible. 409 00:16:00,852 --> 00:16:02,443 Look, drinking is different 410 00:16:02,462 --> 00:16:04,704 than fast food for dinner or video games. 411 00:16:04,856 --> 00:16:06,355 If you let him slide on this, 412 00:16:06,449 --> 00:16:07,690 he's gonna think he can get away with anything. 413 00:16:07,709 --> 00:16:10,259 Yeah, Drake said the same thing. 414 00:16:11,454 --> 00:16:13,454 I just don't want him to hate me. 415 00:16:13,506 --> 00:16:14,955 I get it. 416 00:16:15,049 --> 00:16:17,458 You're about to be a stepmom to a teenager, that isn't easy. 417 00:16:17,477 --> 00:16:19,702 This is the hardest part about being a parent. 418 00:16:19,721 --> 00:16:21,754 If they don't hate you every now and then, 419 00:16:21,889 --> 00:16:24,190 it means you're not doing it right. 420 00:16:25,393 --> 00:16:26,709 Okay. 421 00:16:26,802 --> 00:16:28,544 I guess we should just go talk to him. 422 00:16:28,637 --> 00:16:31,155 I'll do it by myself, take the heat off of you. 423 00:16:31,382 --> 00:16:33,640 No, no, I want to be there. 424 00:16:33,693 --> 00:16:35,702 So, do we use your belt or mine? 425 00:16:36,645 --> 00:16:38,538 Kidding. Right? 426 00:16:41,893 --> 00:16:43,909 -(wind whistling) -Oh, wow. 427 00:16:44,062 --> 00:16:45,411 This is incredible. 428 00:16:45,563 --> 00:16:47,321 I've never seen the city from up here. 429 00:16:47,415 --> 00:16:50,233 Yeah, and this high up, you can barely smell the sulfur 430 00:16:50,251 --> 00:16:52,401 from the tire factory. 431 00:16:52,495 --> 00:16:55,829 This is, this is our home town. (laughs) 432 00:16:55,998 --> 00:16:58,182 Wow! (spits) 433 00:16:58,409 --> 00:17:01,185 I feel like Beyoncé in "Crazy In Love." 434 00:17:01,337 --> 00:17:02,687 I, uh, 435 00:17:02,856 --> 00:17:06,507 wrote you a poem for tonight. 436 00:17:06,675 --> 00:17:08,026 Just... Oh! 437 00:17:08,253 --> 00:17:11,587 Oh! Crap. There it goes. 438 00:17:11,606 --> 00:17:13,680 You'll have to trust me, it was really good. 439 00:17:13,700 --> 00:17:16,034 I rhymed "salad" and "valid." 440 00:17:16,185 --> 00:17:19,445 I don't need a poem. Come here. 441 00:17:19,597 --> 00:17:21,205 Oh... 442 00:17:21,357 --> 00:17:24,709 My heel's caught. (stammers, shrieks) 443 00:17:24,860 --> 00:17:26,285 Oh. 444 00:17:26,437 --> 00:17:27,937 (sighs) 445 00:17:27,955 --> 00:17:29,772 You okay? 446 00:17:29,865 --> 00:17:31,440 I've never been better. 447 00:17:31,459 --> 00:17:33,959 -(siren chirps) -OFFICER: This is the Louisville Police. 448 00:17:34,054 --> 00:17:35,386 You are trespassing. 449 00:17:35,496 --> 00:17:37,055 (screams) 450 00:17:37,206 --> 00:17:38,372 Oh, my God, I'm so sorry. 451 00:17:38,466 --> 00:17:41,951 Oh, it's okay. Just another memory. 452 00:17:41,969 --> 00:17:44,937 We'll be right down. 453 00:17:45,973 --> 00:17:48,291 Our night ended in handcuffs, too, 454 00:17:48,309 --> 00:17:51,152 but not in the same way. 455 00:18:03,249 --> 00:18:05,641 Sorry tonight was such a fail. 456 00:18:05,734 --> 00:18:09,662 Only song you could write about this would be "Womp Womp." 457 00:18:10,815 --> 00:18:13,925 I kind of thought that's what this was about. 458 00:18:14,152 --> 00:18:16,485 Why are you trying to compete with a song? 459 00:18:16,504 --> 00:18:20,156 Because your relationship with Brigitte was so passionate 460 00:18:20,174 --> 00:18:24,251 and exciting and chock-full of public nudity. 461 00:18:24,329 --> 00:18:26,086 Well, so is a night on ecstasy, 462 00:18:26,164 --> 00:18:28,255 but when you wake up naked under an overpass, 463 00:18:28,274 --> 00:18:30,516 you wish you'd never done it. 464 00:18:30,610 --> 00:18:32,193 I have heard. 465 00:18:33,521 --> 00:18:36,531 I'm not with Brigitte for a reason. 466 00:18:38,267 --> 00:18:41,160 I just want to be exciting for you. 467 00:18:41,955 --> 00:18:44,513 You are. 468 00:18:44,532 --> 00:18:47,625 And if what you really need is a song 469 00:18:47,776 --> 00:18:50,369 that's all about you, 470 00:18:50,521 --> 00:18:53,464 I can't think of anything easier to write. 471 00:18:56,861 --> 00:18:59,971 Would it help if I laid down a fresh funky beat? 472 00:19:01,215 --> 00:19:03,516 -It would not. -(laughs) 473 00:19:05,536 --> 00:19:07,294 (sighs) 474 00:19:07,313 --> 00:19:09,372 ♪ I've been different people ♪ 475 00:19:09,465 --> 00:19:11,874 ♪ As years have passed ♪ 476 00:19:11,893 --> 00:19:13,800 ♪ Didn't know who I was ♪ 477 00:19:13,820 --> 00:19:15,862 ♪ So nothing could last ♪ 478 00:19:16,731 --> 00:19:18,230 ♪ But you fit in my arms ♪ 479 00:19:18,324 --> 00:19:20,807 ♪ Like you fit in my heart ♪ 480 00:19:20,885 --> 00:19:23,219 ♪ There was never a doubt ♪ 481 00:19:23,237 --> 00:19:26,555 ♪ You were always you from the start ♪ 482 00:19:26,574 --> 00:19:28,224 ♪ I didn't know me ♪ 483 00:19:28,242 --> 00:19:31,252 ♪ Till I met you. ♪ 484 00:19:36,067 --> 00:19:38,734 ♪ When you didn't sing about me ♪ 485 00:19:38,827 --> 00:19:40,903 ♪ It made me a little bitchy ♪ 486 00:19:40,922 --> 00:19:42,405 (laughs) 487 00:19:42,423 --> 00:19:44,164 ♪ I think it's 'cause my mom ♪ 488 00:19:44,184 --> 00:19:47,576 ♪ Had sex all night with Lionel Richie ♪ 489 00:19:48,354 --> 00:19:51,672 ♪ She's beautiful in every sense ♪ 490 00:19:51,766 --> 00:19:55,526 ♪ And her hair's still hanging from that fence ♪ 491 00:19:57,012 --> 00:20:00,105 ♪ When we finally reached the top ♪ 492 00:20:00,200 --> 00:20:04,260 ♪ I felt the wind on my new bald spot ♪ 493 00:20:04,278 --> 00:20:07,688 ♪ And every time I see her ♪ 494 00:20:07,782 --> 00:20:11,358 ♪ There's always something new ♪ 495 00:20:11,436 --> 00:20:13,285 ♪ But the one thing ♪ 496 00:20:13,438 --> 00:20:16,272 ♪ That stays the same ♪ 497 00:20:16,290 --> 00:20:18,716 ♪ My everything ♪ 498 00:20:20,611 --> 00:20:23,638 ♪ I love you. ♪ 499 00:20:26,583 --> 00:20:28,517 You love me? 500 00:20:29,729 --> 00:20:32,396 You need me to sing it again? 501 00:20:32,565 --> 00:20:35,149 Every day. 502 00:20:38,629 --> 00:20:41,197 I love you, too. 503 00:20:42,725 --> 00:20:44,575 (chuckles) 504 00:20:47,413 --> 00:20:49,580 (both moaning) 505 00:20:51,084 --> 00:20:53,542 -Hey. -(sighs) 506 00:20:54,479 --> 00:20:57,313 You ever done it in a cop car? 507 00:20:57,331 --> 00:20:59,164 Uh... 508 00:20:59,300 --> 00:21:00,833 No? 509 00:21:00,985 --> 00:21:02,635 (laughs) 510 00:21:07,008 --> 00:21:08,099 (applause) 511 00:21:08,250 --> 00:21:10,434 (marching band playing) 512 00:21:14,440 --> 00:21:16,691 ♪ ♪ 513 00:21:27,269 --> 00:21:30,362 Captioning sponsored by WARNER BROS. TELEVISION 514 00:21:30,439 --> 00:21:33,749 Captioned by Media Access Group at WGBH access.wgbh.org