1
00:00:03,415 --> 00:00:05,461
[snoring]

2
00:00:08,507 --> 00:00:11,249
Oh, hello.

3
00:00:13,034 --> 00:00:15,036
I must have overslept.

4
00:00:17,038 --> 00:00:19,301
Phil, Randi and I
had a really wild time

5
00:00:19,344 --> 00:00:20,824
at the café last night.

6
00:00:20,867 --> 00:00:22,347
And our next cat looking

7
00:00:22,391 --> 00:00:25,568
for her forever home
is Claw-dia Sniffer.

8
00:00:25,611 --> 00:00:27,396
What she lacks in hair,
she makes up for

9
00:00:27,439 --> 00:00:29,398
with her purr-fect complexion.

10
00:00:29,441 --> 00:00:32,662
Her secret?
She never stops grooming.

11
00:00:34,359 --> 00:00:37,145
Randi has built up
quite a social media following

12
00:00:37,188 --> 00:00:38,885
by livestreaming our events.

13
00:00:38,929 --> 00:00:40,800
She even put a GoPro camera
on Meghan Meow-kel

14
00:00:40,844 --> 00:00:44,500
so people online
can watch what she does all day.

15
00:00:44,543 --> 00:00:46,110
What is Meghan doing now?

16
00:00:46,154 --> 00:00:49,287
Still sitting on her ass
like the princess she is.

17
00:00:51,115 --> 00:00:52,856
So exciting.

18
00:00:52,899 --> 00:00:54,988
Doing what you love
with people you love

19
00:00:55,032 --> 00:00:56,773
is a business owner's dream.

20
00:00:56,816 --> 00:00:59,123
And Phil, Randi and I--
we're kind of a dream team.

21
00:00:59,167 --> 00:01:00,646
Speaking of dreams,

22
00:01:00,690 --> 00:01:03,214
I've been having a recurring one
about Max.

23
00:01:05,216 --> 00:01:07,436
You want a banana split?

24
00:01:07,479 --> 00:01:09,394
Where'd you get that?

25
00:01:09,438 --> 00:01:12,180
From that fly-thru
ice cream stand.

26
00:01:12,223 --> 00:01:14,312
You know what I'm thinking?

27
00:01:14,356 --> 00:01:17,359
That we should keep our eyes
peeled for a flying churro cart?

28
00:01:17,402 --> 00:01:19,926
That you're beautiful
in the moonlight.

29
00:01:23,539 --> 00:01:25,367
BOTH:
Oh!

30
00:01:25,410 --> 00:01:28,718
And that's the real reason
I overslept.

31
00:01:28,761 --> 00:01:30,807
And now, on with our show.

32
00:01:32,809 --> 00:01:34,941
♪

33
00:01:38,815 --> 00:01:41,078
[sing-songy]:
Guess what I had again.

34
00:01:41,122 --> 00:01:42,906
I told you when I took this job,

35
00:01:42,949 --> 00:01:45,038
there are three things I hate--
building IKEA furniture,

36
00:01:45,082 --> 00:01:47,911
picking up friends from
the airport and guessing games.

37
00:01:47,954 --> 00:01:50,783
It's true. She even put it
on her application.

38
00:01:50,827 --> 00:01:53,221
I had the flying dream
about Max again.

39
00:01:53,264 --> 00:01:56,528
It was so wonderfully real,
to finally touch a cloud,

40
00:01:56,572 --> 00:01:59,401
take in a bird's-eye view
of the city, and wonder,

41
00:01:59,444 --> 00:02:02,882
if I pooped on someone,
would they think it was lucky?

42
00:02:02,926 --> 00:02:04,841
Probably not.

43
00:02:04,884 --> 00:02:06,973
So did you kiss him?

44
00:02:07,017 --> 00:02:08,975
I don't dream kiss-and-tell.

45
00:02:09,019 --> 00:02:11,152
No.

46
00:02:11,195 --> 00:02:14,198
Here's an idea. Why don't you
just tell Max about the dream?

47
00:02:14,242 --> 00:02:15,982
Get his reaction.

48
00:02:16,026 --> 00:02:17,984
Gauge whether he wants
to try to kiss you in real life.

49
00:02:18,028 --> 00:02:19,812
He's still hung up
on his ex-girlfriend Brigitte.

50
00:02:19,856 --> 00:02:21,336
Well, she lives in France,
and his penis is here.

51
00:02:21,379 --> 00:02:23,164
That's all I'm saying.

52
00:02:23,207 --> 00:02:25,992
Randi, please.
There are kittens in here.

53
00:02:26,036 --> 00:02:28,038
And to be honest,

54
00:02:28,081 --> 00:02:30,910
the real joy of a crush is
that it's one-sided.

55
00:02:30,954 --> 00:02:33,609
It's all mine to do with
as I wish,

56
00:02:33,652 --> 00:02:35,828
without his pesky feelings
getting in the way.

57
00:02:35,872 --> 00:02:37,265
So you're gonna do nothing

58
00:02:37,308 --> 00:02:38,614
because you're afraid
he'll reject you?

59
00:02:38,657 --> 00:02:40,746
-There's that, too.
-Mm.

60
00:02:40,790 --> 00:02:42,226
Excuse me.

61
00:02:42,270 --> 00:02:44,228
Hello. How can I help you,
kind patron?

62
00:02:44,272 --> 00:02:45,882
[Southern accent]:
This lemon chiffon cake
is so good,

63
00:02:45,925 --> 00:02:47,405
it made me want
to call my daddy,

64
00:02:47,449 --> 00:02:49,668
and I haven't talked
to him in 15 years.

65
00:02:49,712 --> 00:02:51,279
I know, it's pretty great,
right?

66
00:02:51,322 --> 00:02:53,237
And I can brag
'cause I didn't make it.

67
00:02:53,281 --> 00:02:56,197
But I was smart enough to hire
the guy who did, so, yay me.

68
00:02:56,240 --> 00:02:59,896
Well, I'm getting married soon,
and I was wondering

69
00:02:59,939 --> 00:03:01,854
if you'd be able
to make it into a wedding cake.

70
00:03:01,898 --> 00:03:04,030
Maybe to serve about 60 people?

71
00:03:04,074 --> 00:03:06,337
Um, I'll have to check
with our baker,

72
00:03:06,381 --> 00:03:08,296
but I'm pretty sure
he'll be on board.

73
00:03:08,339 --> 00:03:09,993
Here's all my info.

74
00:03:10,036 --> 00:03:12,517
Look forward to your baker
giving me a jingle.

75
00:03:12,561 --> 00:03:14,780
All right, we'll be in touch.
Have a Kitty-Rific Day.

76
00:03:14,824 --> 00:03:16,129
Thank you.

77
00:03:16,173 --> 00:03:18,001
Yes!

78
00:03:18,044 --> 00:03:19,611
It starts with one wedding cake,

79
00:03:19,655 --> 00:03:21,526
and pretty soon,
we're the official pastry bakers

80
00:03:21,570 --> 00:03:24,790
for the Kentucky Derby and royal
weddings all across the globe.

81
00:03:24,834 --> 00:03:26,401
You really can dream, can't you?

82
00:03:27,924 --> 00:03:29,491
-I'm back.
-KAT: Oh, Phil,

83
00:03:29,534 --> 00:03:30,970
I have huge news.

84
00:03:31,014 --> 00:03:32,842
You finally kissed Max
in your dream.

85
00:03:32,885 --> 00:03:35,192
Less huge. You just missed
a customer who asked

86
00:03:35,236 --> 00:03:37,281
if you could make your lemon
chiffon cake for his wedding.

87
00:03:37,325 --> 00:03:39,501
Are you squeezing my piping bag?

88
00:03:39,544 --> 00:03:41,024
Somebody wants to eat my cake

89
00:03:41,067 --> 00:03:43,331
as an extension of their love?

90
00:03:43,374 --> 00:03:46,943
Does the phrase "eat my cake"
sound dirty to anyone else?

91
00:03:46,986 --> 00:03:50,903
Did you not just hear,
"squeezing my piping bag"?

92
00:03:50,947 --> 00:03:52,731
Here's his information.

93
00:03:52,775 --> 00:03:55,081
As soon as we calculate
the price for the larger cake,

94
00:03:55,125 --> 00:03:56,692
I'll call and confirm.

95
00:03:56,735 --> 00:03:59,869
Get ready for the wedding cake
of your life!

96
00:03:59,912 --> 00:04:01,958
"Lane Gaffney"?

97
00:04:02,001 --> 00:04:03,351
Oh, no.

98
00:04:03,394 --> 00:04:04,961
Are you okay, Phil?

99
00:04:05,004 --> 00:04:07,833
Yeah, you look pale.
I mean, paler than usual.

100
00:04:07,877 --> 00:04:11,794
Lane Gaffney is the name
of the boy Marty left me for.

101
00:04:11,837 --> 00:04:16,364
Well, I-I'm sure it's got
to be a different Lane Gaffney.

102
00:04:16,407 --> 00:04:19,454
I bet
that he wrote his name wrong,

103
00:04:19,497 --> 00:04:21,238
because
when he introduced himself,

104
00:04:21,282 --> 00:04:23,719
he said his name was
"Waynes Taffney."

105
00:04:23,762 --> 00:04:26,287
You know, when gay marriage
was made legal,

106
00:04:26,330 --> 00:04:28,376
Marty said it was a conspiracy

107
00:04:28,419 --> 00:04:31,117
by the wedding industry
to get our gay dollars.

108
00:04:31,161 --> 00:04:34,686
But in reality, I guess
he just didn't want to marry me.

109
00:04:34,730 --> 00:04:36,253
RANDI:
Well, doesn't Marty's boyfriend

110
00:04:36,297 --> 00:04:37,907
know that you work here?
I think it's kind of

111
00:04:37,950 --> 00:04:40,039
cruel for him to ask you
to make his cake.

112
00:04:40,083 --> 00:04:42,215
See, "make his cake"
also sounds dirty to me.

113
00:04:42,259 --> 00:04:45,001
Marty suggested
after the breakup

114
00:04:45,044 --> 00:04:46,959
that we not communicate

115
00:04:47,003 --> 00:04:50,528
because he couldn't understand
me through my blubbering.

116
00:04:51,486 --> 00:04:54,402
Well, I-I'm...
I'm just gonna call Lane...

117
00:04:54,445 --> 00:04:56,360
I mean Waynes, and tell him

118
00:04:56,404 --> 00:05:00,103
that we cannot make that cake
because of an egg shortage.

119
00:05:00,146 --> 00:05:01,931
Due to a chicken shortage.

120
00:05:01,974 --> 00:05:04,107
And we just don't know
which came first.

121
00:05:04,150 --> 00:05:06,109
Yeah, you shouldn't have
to make your ex's cake.

122
00:05:06,152 --> 00:05:08,241
You've given him enough
of your frosting.

123
00:05:08,285 --> 00:05:10,722
Okay, that is just filthy.

124
00:05:11,723 --> 00:05:13,508
You want to help me drink
this expired bourbon?

125
00:05:13,551 --> 00:05:16,380
-Does bourbon expire?
-Do you want to help me or not?

126
00:05:16,424 --> 00:05:18,904
I'm in, even though
bourbon gives me weird dreams.

127
00:05:18,948 --> 00:05:21,211
Couldn't be any weirder
than the dream I keep having.

128
00:05:22,212 --> 00:05:24,606
If he says
it's about us flying together,

129
00:05:24,649 --> 00:05:26,434
I'm going to rip my shirt off
right now.

130
00:05:26,477 --> 00:05:29,132
Funny. I've been having
crazy dreams, too.

131
00:05:29,175 --> 00:05:30,699
What's yours about?

132
00:05:30,742 --> 00:05:33,571
Okay, let's see.
I'm in a horse-drawn carriage.

133
00:05:33,615 --> 00:05:35,660
Okay, I guess
I'm leaving this on.

134
00:05:35,704 --> 00:05:37,749
Were you driving,
or was someone else driving it?

135
00:05:37,793 --> 00:05:39,664
I was driving it,
and wearing medieval armor.

136
00:05:39,708 --> 00:05:41,710
And then, suddenly,
I get a flat.

137
00:05:41,753 --> 00:05:43,146
But when I get out
to take a look at it,

138
00:05:43,189 --> 00:05:44,539
instead of normal
carriage wheels,

139
00:05:44,582 --> 00:05:46,584
I have big monster-truck tires.

140
00:05:46,628 --> 00:05:48,804
Monster-truck tires
on a horse-drawn carriage.

141
00:05:48,847 --> 00:05:50,414
Lot of themes, lot of themes.

142
00:05:50,458 --> 00:05:52,242
Yeah. And when I try
to change the tire,

143
00:05:52,285 --> 00:05:53,983
it turns into a giant pizza.

144
00:05:54,026 --> 00:05:57,073
But just as I'm about
to take a bite... I wake up.

145
00:05:57,116 --> 00:05:58,683
Oh, that's frustrating.

146
00:05:58,727 --> 00:06:00,163
I've had it three nights
in a row.

147
00:06:00,206 --> 00:06:01,512
So what's it trying
to tell me?

148
00:06:01,556 --> 00:06:05,647
Okay, you want
to go back in time

149
00:06:05,690 --> 00:06:08,650
when you felt protected,
ergo the armor,

150
00:06:08,693 --> 00:06:11,827
and suckle at the teat of pizza.

151
00:06:11,870 --> 00:06:13,916
-Well, I do love pizza.
-[laughs]

152
00:06:13,959 --> 00:06:16,353
-What's yours about?
-Mm.

153
00:06:16,397 --> 00:06:18,181
Hmm?

154
00:06:18,224 --> 00:06:20,401
Your crazy dream--
what's it about?

155
00:06:22,925 --> 00:06:25,318
Well, funnily enough, Max,
you are featured in it.

156
00:06:25,362 --> 00:06:27,843
-Really?
-Yup. It's a flying dream.

157
00:06:27,886 --> 00:06:29,627
-I love those.
-Yeah, me, too.

158
00:06:29,671 --> 00:06:31,934
We're flying over Louisville,
sharing a banana split...

159
00:06:31,977 --> 00:06:33,805
I'm more of a savory guy,
but go on.

160
00:06:33,849 --> 00:06:36,025
And we're holding hands so
that we don't lose each other.

161
00:06:36,068 --> 00:06:37,287
And then we decide
to see if we can--

162
00:06:37,330 --> 00:06:38,462
here goes nothing--

163
00:06:38,506 --> 00:06:40,508
kiss in the air while flying.

164
00:06:40,551 --> 00:06:42,118
-And can we?
-We cannot.

165
00:06:42,161 --> 00:06:44,468
-Ah.
-The wind keeps
pushing us apart.

166
00:06:44,512 --> 00:06:46,514
It's such a hater.

167
00:06:46,557 --> 00:06:48,516
Anyway, I think
that's why it's recurring,

168
00:06:48,559 --> 00:06:49,865
because there's no closure.

169
00:06:49,908 --> 00:06:51,693
You know, same for you.

170
00:06:51,736 --> 00:06:55,436
I never eat the pizza so I keep
dreaming about the pizza.

171
00:06:55,479 --> 00:06:57,394
Exactly.

172
00:07:01,529 --> 00:07:03,705
There. Maybe now
you can get back to dreaming

173
00:07:03,748 --> 00:07:06,621
about something more fun
than boring old me.

174
00:07:08,623 --> 00:07:12,278
Expired bourbon...
is the best bourbon.

175
00:07:17,327 --> 00:07:19,155
Good morning. I hope
you're enjoying your coffee

176
00:07:19,198 --> 00:07:22,201
and that
we're meeting your expectations.

177
00:07:22,245 --> 00:07:24,465
-Guess what?
-I told you when
I took this job,

178
00:07:24,508 --> 00:07:26,597
there are three things I hate--
building IKEA furniture...

179
00:07:26,641 --> 00:07:29,208
I told Max about my dream,
and he kissed me.

180
00:07:29,252 --> 00:07:31,428
[gasps]
A long kiss or a short kiss?

181
00:07:31,472 --> 00:07:34,605
Hard to tell
because time stood still.

182
00:07:34,649 --> 00:07:36,128
What do you think it means?

183
00:07:36,172 --> 00:07:37,652
PHIL:
It means be careful.

184
00:07:38,653 --> 00:07:41,133
Love will put rocks
in your pockets

185
00:07:41,177 --> 00:07:43,962
and lure you
to the deep end of the creek.

186
00:07:44,963 --> 00:07:47,966
Katharine...
you must feel terrible.

187
00:07:48,010 --> 00:07:49,402
About what?

188
00:07:49,446 --> 00:07:51,448
Well, I was drinking
my morning coffee

189
00:07:51,492 --> 00:07:54,016
and reading your Yelp reviews,
as I do every morning.

190
00:07:54,059 --> 00:07:57,280
I had no idea.
That's kind of sweet.

191
00:07:57,323 --> 00:08:00,675
And I saw you'd gotten
your first one-star review.

192
00:08:00,718 --> 00:08:03,199
Ooh, if that's because
I spelled that guy's name wrong

193
00:08:03,242 --> 00:08:05,244
on his cup, I'm gonna fire back.

194
00:08:05,288 --> 00:08:08,421
If it sounds like an "F," it
should be spelled with an "F."

195
00:08:08,465 --> 00:08:10,902
No, no, it was because you're...

196
00:08:10,946 --> 00:08:12,730
homophobic.

197
00:08:12,774 --> 00:08:14,427
Huh?

198
00:08:14,471 --> 00:08:16,212
I found the review.

199
00:08:16,255 --> 00:08:17,648
[yelps]

200
00:08:17,692 --> 00:08:19,694
Did you just yelp
while reading Yelp? Wait.

201
00:08:19,737 --> 00:08:22,174
Is that why they call it that?

202
00:08:22,218 --> 00:08:24,437
"The pastries
at Kat's Cat Café are wonderful,

203
00:08:24,481 --> 00:08:26,439
"but they are not
a welcoming business.

204
00:08:26,483 --> 00:08:28,790
"I discovered this after
they refused to bake a cake

205
00:08:28,833 --> 00:08:31,793
for my wedding
because I'm gay. Lane G."

206
00:08:31,836 --> 00:08:35,710
-What the...?!
-He's evil!

207
00:08:35,753 --> 00:08:38,234
The guy Phil's ex is marrying
asked

208
00:08:38,277 --> 00:08:39,975
if we would bake
their wedding cake.

209
00:08:40,018 --> 00:08:41,890
Oh, well,
that's certainly awkward.

210
00:08:41,933 --> 00:08:44,370
Exactly. So, I told him
we couldn't do it.

211
00:08:44,414 --> 00:08:47,330
-This is all my fault.
-KAT: No, it's not.

212
00:08:47,373 --> 00:08:50,681
I mean, who would bake a cake
for their ex's wedding

213
00:08:50,725 --> 00:08:52,596
and not put a laxative in it?

214
00:08:53,858 --> 00:08:56,208
Damn. A bunch of people
shared that review on Insta,

215
00:08:56,252 --> 00:08:58,167
and we've already lost
200 followers.

216
00:08:58,210 --> 00:09:01,126
We had 200 followers?! Yes!

217
00:09:01,170 --> 00:09:03,999
Kat, I don't want you
to lose customers.

218
00:09:04,042 --> 00:09:05,391
Then you need to call Lane back

219
00:09:05,435 --> 00:09:07,002
and tell him
to take that review down

220
00:09:07,045 --> 00:09:08,438
and explain to him
the real reason

221
00:09:08,481 --> 00:09:10,396
we're not baking that cake.

222
00:09:10,440 --> 00:09:12,442
But if I do that, then Marty
will know, while he's moved on,

223
00:09:12,485 --> 00:09:15,053
I'm in the same broken place.

224
00:09:17,752 --> 00:09:20,668
Look, maybe we're overreacting.

225
00:09:20,711 --> 00:09:22,974
You know, we know in our hearts
that we weren't discriminating.

226
00:09:23,018 --> 00:09:24,976
Well, you were discriminating.

227
00:09:25,020 --> 00:09:28,023
Not because he's gay.
Because he's a homewrecker.

228
00:09:28,066 --> 00:09:31,156
Even so, maybe,

229
00:09:31,200 --> 00:09:34,029
instead of defending ourselves
against this one situation,

230
00:09:34,072 --> 00:09:36,901
we need to show people that...
that we welcome everyone.

231
00:09:36,945 --> 00:09:39,382
Ooh, how about I showcase
Neil Cat-rick Harris

232
00:09:39,425 --> 00:09:40,557
as our cat of the month?

233
00:09:40,601 --> 00:09:42,124
Yes, do that.

234
00:09:42,167 --> 00:09:43,995
And I can go pick up
some rainbow balloons

235
00:09:44,039 --> 00:09:46,694
so everybody will know that this
is a place where love grows.

236
00:09:46,737 --> 00:09:48,783
Oh.

237
00:09:51,699 --> 00:09:54,397
If everyone can't see
how accepting we are,

238
00:09:54,440 --> 00:09:56,878
they can get the heck out!

239
00:09:56,921 --> 00:09:59,663
Well, I see you've gone
from sad to bitter.

240
00:09:59,707 --> 00:10:01,404
I like this side more.

241
00:10:01,447 --> 00:10:05,016
And I see you've put the GoPro
on Neil Cat-rick Harris.

242
00:10:05,060 --> 00:10:06,801
Yup. I'm calling it
"Gay Cat Cam"

243
00:10:06,844 --> 00:10:08,977
so people can see
how inclusive we are.

244
00:10:09,020 --> 00:10:11,457
Plus, we can see where the hell
Neil Cat-rick goes all day.

245
00:10:11,501 --> 00:10:13,459
Have you noticed
he kind of disappears?

246
00:10:13,503 --> 00:10:15,592
Maybe he got left
by some tomcat,

247
00:10:15,636 --> 00:10:18,987
and he goes to a safe space
to lick his wounds.

248
00:10:19,030 --> 00:10:20,858
If by "wounds,"
you mean "butt,"

249
00:10:20,902 --> 00:10:21,859
you're probably right.

250
00:10:21,903 --> 00:10:23,034
[chuckles]

251
00:10:23,078 --> 00:10:25,471
Okay, let's see where he goes.

252
00:10:34,567 --> 00:10:36,265
Hello, my liege.

253
00:10:36,308 --> 00:10:39,181
Hey. Don't tell me that's
the princess hat you bought

254
00:10:39,224 --> 00:10:41,183
when we went to the Highland
Ren Fair senior year.

255
00:10:41,226 --> 00:10:43,446
When you challenged that wizard
to a turkey leg eating contest

256
00:10:43,489 --> 00:10:44,795
and then you threw up in my car?

257
00:10:44,839 --> 00:10:46,275
The very same.

258
00:10:46,318 --> 00:10:47,711
And pizza?

259
00:10:47,755 --> 00:10:49,321
I did not have my dream
last night,

260
00:10:49,365 --> 00:10:51,149
and I slept like a baby.

261
00:10:51,193 --> 00:10:53,282
I also dreamt about babies.
They looked just like him,

262
00:10:53,325 --> 00:10:55,023
stubble and everything.
It was weird.

263
00:10:56,024 --> 00:10:59,027
By making my dream come true,
you broke the cycle.

264
00:10:59,070 --> 00:11:00,550
So I thought
I would do the same for you.

265
00:11:00,593 --> 00:11:02,247
Henceforth,

266
00:11:02,291 --> 00:11:04,075
-your tire.
-Aw, man.

267
00:11:04,119 --> 00:11:05,860
Mikey's Pizza.
Thank you.

268
00:11:05,903 --> 00:11:07,470
CARTER:
Yeah. Thanks, Kat.

269
00:11:07,513 --> 00:11:08,993
I love it when people bring food
from other places

270
00:11:09,037 --> 00:11:11,300
into my restaurant.

271
00:11:11,343 --> 00:11:12,736
Well, don't be too mad,
'cause I'm hoping

272
00:11:12,780 --> 00:11:14,738
I can request a favor
from you both.

273
00:11:14,782 --> 00:11:16,871
A favor from both of us
but the pizza's for him?

274
00:11:16,914 --> 00:11:18,481
Not very well-played, Kat.

275
00:11:18,524 --> 00:11:21,092
Not very well-played.

276
00:11:21,136 --> 00:11:22,877
Please?

277
00:11:22,920 --> 00:11:25,531
The guy Phil's ex is marrying
left a brutal Yelp review

278
00:11:25,575 --> 00:11:27,055
because we wouldn't bake
his wedding cake.

279
00:11:27,098 --> 00:11:28,665
So I was hoping you both

280
00:11:28,709 --> 00:11:31,015
could write glowing reviews
to drown his out.

281
00:11:31,059 --> 00:11:34,279
And bonus points if you pretend
to be a gay couple.

282
00:11:34,323 --> 00:11:35,846
Wouldn't be the first time.

283
00:11:35,890 --> 00:11:38,719
Got us backstage
at the Elton John concert.

284
00:11:38,762 --> 00:11:40,329
But I get half that pizza.

285
00:11:41,286 --> 00:11:43,027
Yeah, we'll write a review.

286
00:11:43,071 --> 00:11:44,812
And this was so nice of you.

287
00:11:44,855 --> 00:11:46,596
Oh, wait, there's more.

288
00:11:46,639 --> 00:11:48,554
In order to continue making
your dreams come true,

289
00:11:48,598 --> 00:11:50,121
I got us...

290
00:11:50,165 --> 00:11:52,558
two tickets to the monster truck
show Saturday!

291
00:11:52,602 --> 00:11:54,386
No way. [announcer voice]:
"This Saturday,

292
00:11:54,430 --> 00:11:57,607
Saturday, Saturday,
prepare to be annihilated!"

293
00:11:57,650 --> 00:11:59,043
Is that a yes?

294
00:11:59,087 --> 00:12:01,132
"I have to ask Carter,
Carter, Carter

295
00:12:01,176 --> 00:12:04,657
for the night off.
I'll let you know ASAP!"

296
00:12:04,701 --> 00:12:06,442
Ow. That hurts my throat.

297
00:12:07,791 --> 00:12:09,010
The guy that does
those commercials

298
00:12:09,053 --> 00:12:10,402
must have no larynx left.

299
00:12:10,446 --> 00:12:12,622
Okeydoke.
Well, I shall await

300
00:12:12,665 --> 00:12:14,102
your response by carrier pigeon.

301
00:12:14,145 --> 00:12:16,757
I bid you adieu.

302
00:12:18,410 --> 00:12:20,804
Uh, by "carrier pigeon,"
I just mean "text."

303
00:12:20,848 --> 00:12:22,545
You can just shoot me a text.
Okay.

304
00:12:22,588 --> 00:12:24,199
Huzzah!

305
00:12:24,242 --> 00:12:26,723
Hey, is it cool
if I take Saturday night off?

306
00:12:26,767 --> 00:12:28,507
Kat asked me to the monster
truck show that night.

307
00:12:28,551 --> 00:12:31,075
Oh. Well, if you got plans
with your girlfriend,

308
00:12:31,119 --> 00:12:32,729
I can try and make that happen.

309
00:12:32,773 --> 00:12:34,600
She's not my girlfriend.

310
00:12:34,644 --> 00:12:36,341
Does she know that?

311
00:12:38,474 --> 00:12:41,303
Ooh, nice balloons.
I feel so welcome here.

312
00:12:41,346 --> 00:12:42,826
What are y'all doing?

313
00:12:42,870 --> 00:12:44,523
Watching Neil Cat-rick Harris.

314
00:12:44,567 --> 00:12:46,917
He got into the air vent
and he's wandering around.

315
00:12:46,961 --> 00:12:48,658
Well, it's clearly not
his first time up there.

316
00:12:48,701 --> 00:12:51,922
There's his plush sushi toy,
his catnip hedgehog.

317
00:12:51,966 --> 00:12:53,968
Ooh, and my lucky scrunchie.

318
00:12:54,011 --> 00:12:55,404
Ooh, he's right over
the Middle C.

319
00:12:55,447 --> 00:12:56,927
I can see Max and Carter
through the vent.

320
00:12:56,971 --> 00:12:59,408
Ooh, turn up the volume.
To be a fly on the wall.

321
00:12:59,451 --> 00:13:01,279
-Or a cat in the vent,
as they say.
-[laughter]

322
00:13:01,323 --> 00:13:03,151
CARTER:
She brought you a pizza.

323
00:13:03,194 --> 00:13:05,153
The last girl that brought me
a pizza I married.

324
00:13:05,196 --> 00:13:06,850
Plus, what was all that

325
00:13:06,894 --> 00:13:08,678
"You helped me with my dream"
business?

326
00:13:08,721 --> 00:13:11,550
Oh, she told me about this dream
where we almost kissed,

327
00:13:11,594 --> 00:13:15,990
so, I don'’t know, it was late,
and I just kind of kissed her.

328
00:13:16,033 --> 00:13:17,426
On the lips?

329
00:13:17,469 --> 00:13:18,906
It was a peck.

330
00:13:18,949 --> 00:13:21,778
Last girl I pecked
I put a baby inside.

331
00:13:23,171 --> 00:13:24,563
I may have picked up
a bad habit in Europe.

332
00:13:24,607 --> 00:13:26,304
Everybody kisses
everybody there.

333
00:13:26,348 --> 00:13:28,785
My landlady kissed me
for paying my rent on time.

334
00:13:28,829 --> 00:13:30,265
With tongue.

335
00:13:30,308 --> 00:13:31,962
Well, welcome to America, buddy.

336
00:13:32,006 --> 00:13:33,616
Unless you plan on giving
your friend some benefits,

337
00:13:33,659 --> 00:13:35,487
you better check yourself.

338
00:13:35,531 --> 00:13:37,533
I'm telling you, girlfriend
wants to be your girlfriend.

339
00:13:37,576 --> 00:13:39,404
Oh, no.
We've been friends forever.

340
00:13:39,448 --> 00:13:41,537
I could never date Kat.

341
00:13:44,932 --> 00:13:47,412
Oh, honey, I'm so sorry.

342
00:13:47,456 --> 00:13:50,067
Maybe the hat was a bit much.

343
00:13:57,118 --> 00:13:59,860
KAT:
I'll make this quick
and painless.

344
00:14:06,301 --> 00:14:08,912
His memory will live on
in our margaritas.

345
00:14:10,087 --> 00:14:12,046
Marty and Max should
both be shot out of a cannon

346
00:14:12,089 --> 00:14:14,178
and I'll light the wick.

347
00:14:14,222 --> 00:14:16,441
At least you had something
real with Marty.

348
00:14:16,485 --> 00:14:18,313
The only romance
I've ever had with Max

349
00:14:18,356 --> 00:14:21,142
was the one in my mind,
and now I don't even have that.

350
00:14:21,185 --> 00:14:22,621
Well, you can still
fantasize about him.

351
00:14:24,797 --> 00:14:26,756
I'm sorry,
did you say something?

352
00:14:26,799 --> 00:14:28,366
Nope.

353
00:14:28,410 --> 00:14:29,454
Oh.

354
00:14:32,109 --> 00:14:34,372
Actually, I don't think I can.

355
00:14:35,373 --> 00:14:37,114
What are you doing?

356
00:14:37,158 --> 00:14:38,942
[chuckles]:
Ooh, sorry.

357
00:14:38,986 --> 00:14:41,423
Daniel's in Lexington for work
and he wanted a photo.

358
00:14:41,466 --> 00:14:42,859
Things have been going
really great with us,

359
00:14:42,903 --> 00:14:44,078
but I didn't want
to make a big to-do

360
00:14:44,121 --> 00:14:46,471
because, well, look at y'all.

361
00:14:48,517 --> 00:14:50,214
Well, I'm happy for you.

362
00:14:50,258 --> 00:14:51,694
I'm just trying to figure out
how to be around Max

363
00:14:51,737 --> 00:14:53,870
and keep what I overheard
a secret.

364
00:14:53,914 --> 00:14:58,309
All you have to do is set your
internal thermostat on ice cold.

365
00:14:58,353 --> 00:15:00,921
That's what my mama did
to our neighbor lady

366
00:15:00,964 --> 00:15:04,185
after she called the cops
for a wellness check

367
00:15:04,228 --> 00:15:06,665
'cause us kids
were running around the yard

368
00:15:06,709 --> 00:15:08,885
without our shirts on.

369
00:15:08,929 --> 00:15:10,713
Wait, someone called the cops
on you for that?

370
00:15:10,756 --> 00:15:12,889
Mm. But it might've been
'cause one of my sisters

371
00:15:12,933 --> 00:15:14,717
was 22 at the time.

372
00:15:18,895 --> 00:15:20,897
Hey. Just here
for my dinner order.

373
00:15:20,941 --> 00:15:23,117
Yep. Right here.

374
00:15:23,160 --> 00:15:24,640
-All ready for you.
-Cool.

375
00:15:24,683 --> 00:15:25,989
Cool beans.
Yeah, Randi, Phil and I

376
00:15:26,033 --> 00:15:27,512
are having a threesome tonight.

377
00:15:27,556 --> 00:15:29,906
That's what I call
three people hanging out.

378
00:15:29,950 --> 00:15:31,734
I'm trying to take words
with sexual connotation

379
00:15:31,777 --> 00:15:33,040
and make them clean again.

380
00:15:33,083 --> 00:15:34,258
Great.

381
00:15:34,302 --> 00:15:35,999
Oh, and, uh, by the way,

382
00:15:36,043 --> 00:15:38,262
sadly, I can't go to the
monster truck show this weekend.

383
00:15:38,306 --> 00:15:40,308
Carter needs me to work.

384
00:15:41,439 --> 00:15:43,050
Oh, well,
that's actually a relief,

385
00:15:43,093 --> 00:15:45,052
because I can't go, either.

386
00:15:45,095 --> 00:15:46,662
But it was your idea.

387
00:15:46,705 --> 00:15:48,446
Yeah. I know,
but I do some volunteer work

388
00:15:48,490 --> 00:15:50,709
for the police department
and they have a new cold case

389
00:15:50,753 --> 00:15:52,711
-that they need me to look at.
-Really?

390
00:15:52,755 --> 00:15:54,757
Yeah, yeah. They call me
the Wolf down at the station

391
00:15:54,800 --> 00:15:56,280
'cause I always catch the sheep.

392
00:15:58,326 --> 00:16:01,459
-Uh, quick question, Max.
-Yeah.

393
00:16:01,503 --> 00:16:03,853
What does
"I could never date Kat" mean?

394
00:16:03,896 --> 00:16:06,595
I mean, I don't mean
to make you uncomfortable,

395
00:16:06,638 --> 00:16:08,771
it's just, uh, it's
an interesting choice of words.

396
00:16:08,814 --> 00:16:11,339
"I could never."
Because, you know, technically,

397
00:16:11,382 --> 00:16:14,516
uh, someone could do
anything that they want to.

398
00:16:14,559 --> 00:16:16,170
Did Carter say something to you?

399
00:16:16,213 --> 00:16:18,085
No.

400
00:16:18,128 --> 00:16:19,956
Neil Cat-rick Harris
was up in the vents

401
00:16:20,000 --> 00:16:21,610
and he was wearing a GoPro,

402
00:16:21,653 --> 00:16:24,265
so I caught your entire
conversation with Carter.

403
00:16:24,308 --> 00:16:25,831
Kat, that's a little hard
to believe.

404
00:16:25,875 --> 00:16:28,051
-[cat meows]
-Easier now.

405
00:16:28,095 --> 00:16:30,097
Neil, go home.

406
00:16:33,752 --> 00:16:35,580
I love you, Kat.

407
00:16:35,624 --> 00:16:37,408
There's never a dull moment
when we hang out.

408
00:16:37,452 --> 00:16:38,931
You make everything fun.

409
00:16:38,975 --> 00:16:40,759
Plus, you're crazy smart

410
00:16:40,803 --> 00:16:46,287
and a really generous person,
but...

411
00:16:46,330 --> 00:16:48,550
I hate the word "but."

412
00:16:48,593 --> 00:16:51,074
I just see you as a friend.

413
00:16:51,118 --> 00:16:54,295
And-and considering
my dating history,

414
00:16:54,338 --> 00:16:57,037
my friendships last a lot longer
than my relationships,

415
00:16:57,080 --> 00:16:59,387
so that's actually a much
better category to be in.

416
00:16:59,430 --> 00:17:03,608
Because I hope
that we'll be friends forever.

417
00:17:03,652 --> 00:17:06,046
Then why'd you just
cancel on me?

418
00:17:07,090 --> 00:17:08,874
I didn't want to lead you on.

419
00:17:10,311 --> 00:17:11,964
I mean, is that what
a real friend would do?

420
00:17:12,008 --> 00:17:13,792
Or-or would
they have a-an honest

421
00:17:13,836 --> 00:17:16,099
and-and perhaps difficult talk?

422
00:17:17,144 --> 00:17:18,536
Because, you know, avoiding me

423
00:17:18,580 --> 00:17:20,756
is-is a sure way
to ruin our friendship.

424
00:17:22,714 --> 00:17:24,325
[sighs]
In that case,

425
00:17:24,368 --> 00:17:26,240
I would love to go
to the monster truck show

426
00:17:26,283 --> 00:17:29,069
with you this weekend,
if the offer still stands.

427
00:17:30,287 --> 00:17:34,074
[announcer voice]:
'Cause we'll have a blast!

428
00:17:35,510 --> 00:17:37,468
Well, let me just see
if I can, uh,

429
00:17:37,512 --> 00:17:39,688
reschedule that police work
and, um,

430
00:17:39,731 --> 00:17:41,951
I'll get back to you.

431
00:17:41,994 --> 00:17:45,302
One could argue
that was still pretty cool.

432
00:17:45,346 --> 00:17:46,477
Oh...

433
00:17:48,479 --> 00:17:52,440
I'd like to place
a dinner order to go.

434
00:17:52,483 --> 00:17:54,050
Hey, guess what.

435
00:17:54,094 --> 00:17:55,921
Ooh, what's going on here?

436
00:17:55,965 --> 00:17:57,749
Unfortunately, Twitter decided

437
00:17:57,793 --> 00:17:59,795
the Neil Cat-rick Harris thing
was a PR stunt

438
00:17:59,838 --> 00:18:01,797
rather than an attempt
at a meaningful conversation,

439
00:18:01,840 --> 00:18:05,148
so they're calling for a boycott
of the café on Saturday.

440
00:18:05,192 --> 00:18:06,976
PHIL:
But do not worry.

441
00:18:07,019 --> 00:18:08,456
I'm gonna make this right
for you, Kat.

442
00:18:08,499 --> 00:18:10,936
Randi is fixing
to film my statement.

443
00:18:10,980 --> 00:18:13,200
I'm gonna tell Lane and Marty
and all our followers

444
00:18:13,243 --> 00:18:16,159
that I'm the reason
we cannot make that cake.

445
00:18:16,203 --> 00:18:18,161
Phil, I can't let you do that.

446
00:18:18,205 --> 00:18:20,729
Oh, hallelujah.

447
00:18:20,772 --> 00:18:24,124
Thank you so much. That's what
I was hoping you'd say.

448
00:18:24,167 --> 00:18:25,908
But what you are gonna do

449
00:18:25,951 --> 00:18:27,388
is bake that wedding cake
for Lane and Marty.

450
00:18:27,431 --> 00:18:30,478
-But I don't...
-No, listen.

451
00:18:30,521 --> 00:18:32,175
Look, I just saw Max,

452
00:18:32,219 --> 00:18:34,221
and I thought
it was gonna be so painful

453
00:18:34,264 --> 00:18:36,440
now that I know
we'll only ever be friends.

454
00:18:36,484 --> 00:18:40,488
But when I left the Middle C,
I felt amazing.

455
00:18:40,531 --> 00:18:42,577
Like I could really fly.

456
00:18:42,620 --> 00:18:44,535
Like I had just been set free
from something

457
00:18:44,579 --> 00:18:46,668
that had been holding me back
and, Phil,

458
00:18:46,711 --> 00:18:48,452
I want to set you free, too.

459
00:18:48,496 --> 00:18:51,499
But even if I made that cake,
it wouldn't taste right.

460
00:18:51,542 --> 00:18:53,370
I have to bake
with love in my heart

461
00:18:53,414 --> 00:18:56,460
and my heart is broke
plumb in two.

462
00:18:56,504 --> 00:18:58,070
Well, Phil, you love me,

463
00:18:58,114 --> 00:18:59,507
'cause look what you were
just about to do for me.

464
00:18:59,550 --> 00:19:01,639
And you love Randi
a-and the café.

465
00:19:01,683 --> 00:19:03,511
And all the cats.

466
00:19:03,554 --> 00:19:07,254
And my mama.
My seven brothers and sisters.

467
00:19:07,297 --> 00:19:09,386
My baby ducks.

468
00:19:09,430 --> 00:19:12,128
You are surrounded
by love, Phil.

469
00:19:12,172 --> 00:19:15,436
I mean, the ducks thing is
kind of weird, but we got you.

470
00:19:15,479 --> 00:19:17,394
-Here.
-[line ringing]

471
00:19:20,571 --> 00:19:21,920
Hello?

472
00:19:21,964 --> 00:19:23,139
Hello, Lane?

473
00:19:24,227 --> 00:19:26,577
This is the baker
from Kat's Cat Café.

474
00:19:26,621 --> 00:19:28,840
I would be honored
to bake your wedding cake

475
00:19:28,884 --> 00:19:32,453
for you
and your soon-to-be husband.

476
00:19:32,496 --> 00:19:35,064
What'd I tell you? Dream team.

477
00:19:39,938 --> 00:19:41,810
God, you look beautiful tonight.

478
00:19:41,853 --> 00:19:43,986
-I know.
-[chuckles]

479
00:19:44,987 --> 00:19:46,336
Come here, you.

480
00:19:46,380 --> 00:19:48,512
-[screams]
-[grunts]

481
00:19:49,861 --> 00:19:51,559
What the...?

482
00:19:56,868 --> 00:19:58,348
♪

483
00:19:58,392 --> 00:20:00,045
♪ I want to say hello
to the world♪

484
00:20:00,089 --> 00:20:01,395
[applause, whooping]

485
00:20:01,438 --> 00:20:04,180
♪ And it feels so good...♪

486
00:20:04,224 --> 00:20:06,182
♪ Wave your hands and say♪

487
00:20:06,226 --> 00:20:08,576
♪ Hello to the world♪

488
00:20:08,619 --> 00:20:12,275
♪ Do the things
you always wish you would♪

489
00:20:12,319 --> 00:20:16,671
♪ Wave your hands
and say hello to the world♪

490
00:20:16,714 --> 00:20:18,542
♪

491
00:20:18,586 --> 00:20:20,762
♪ Hello to the world♪

492
00:20:20,805 --> 00:20:22,416
-♪ Feels so♪
-♪ Feels so good♪

493
00:20:22,459 --> 00:20:23,504
♪ Feels so♪

494
00:20:25,157 --> 00:20:28,857
♪ Do the things
you always wish you would♪

495
00:20:28,900 --> 00:20:31,512
♪ Wave your hands and say hello
to the world.♪