1 00:00:02,066 --> 00:00:04,634 Okay. One, two, three. 2 00:00:04,677 --> 00:00:06,070 [grunting] 3 00:00:06,114 --> 00:00:08,986 That was a tie if I've ever seen one. 4 00:00:09,030 --> 00:00:10,596 Not that I can see that far. 5 00:00:10,640 --> 00:00:12,337 -I really shouldn't be driving. -[chuckles] 6 00:00:12,381 --> 00:00:14,078 Good job. 7 00:00:14,122 --> 00:00:16,341 How 'bout that? My former crush, Max, 8 00:00:16,385 --> 00:00:19,562 and my boyfriend, Oscar, getting along like gangbusters. 9 00:00:19,605 --> 00:00:23,087 Hey. Want to try my homemade salsa? 10 00:00:23,131 --> 00:00:24,871 You just poured it out of a jar. 11 00:00:24,915 --> 00:00:27,657 Hey. Want to try my home-poured salsa? 12 00:00:27,700 --> 00:00:29,267 [chuckling] 13 00:00:29,311 --> 00:00:30,964 Mm. Speaking of salsa, 14 00:00:31,008 --> 00:00:33,141 do you want to go salsa dancing with me sometime? 15 00:00:33,184 --> 00:00:34,838 Um, yes! 16 00:00:34,881 --> 00:00:36,318 And be warned... 17 00:00:36,361 --> 00:00:38,668 [chuckles]: I am a great salsa dancer! 18 00:00:38,711 --> 00:00:40,365 At sleepaway camp, I had to choose 19 00:00:40,409 --> 00:00:42,846 between salsa and archery, and I chose salsa, 20 00:00:42,889 --> 00:00:44,456 'cause Hunger Games hadn't come out yet 21 00:00:44,500 --> 00:00:46,154 and we didn't know how cool archery could be. 22 00:00:46,197 --> 00:00:48,112 Well, I am excited to go dancing with you. 23 00:00:48,156 --> 00:00:49,374 I used to go with my ex-girlfriend all the time. 24 00:00:49,418 --> 00:00:50,462 We had a lot of fun. 25 00:00:51,681 --> 00:00:53,422 I hope that's not weird, to bring up my ex. 26 00:00:53,465 --> 00:00:55,250 No! Of course not. 27 00:00:55,293 --> 00:00:56,773 Everybody has a past. 28 00:00:56,816 --> 00:00:58,340 I ain't scared of no ghost. [chuckles] 29 00:00:58,383 --> 00:01:00,168 What do you mean, "ghost"? She's not dead. 30 00:01:00,211 --> 00:01:02,996 No, she's not. I have no idea why I said that. 31 00:01:05,173 --> 00:01:07,044 Oh, Katharine. 32 00:01:07,088 --> 00:01:10,003 You found a real winner with this Oscar. 33 00:01:10,047 --> 00:01:11,701 KAT: He and I are gonna go salsa dancing. 34 00:01:11,744 --> 00:01:13,485 Do you remember when I did salsa at sleepaway camp? 35 00:01:13,529 --> 00:01:14,791 Polka. 36 00:01:14,834 --> 00:01:16,445 No, it was salsa. 37 00:01:16,488 --> 00:01:18,055 It was polka. 38 00:01:18,099 --> 00:01:19,535 I remember the recital. 39 00:01:19,578 --> 00:01:21,493 I had to buy you lederhosen. 40 00:01:23,016 --> 00:01:24,366 Oh. 41 00:01:24,409 --> 00:01:25,889 That's right. 42 00:01:25,932 --> 00:01:27,978 They chafed. [hisses] 43 00:01:28,021 --> 00:01:30,067 ♪ 44 00:01:34,027 --> 00:01:35,942 Hey. 45 00:01:35,986 --> 00:01:37,466 I'm about to do a thing 46 00:01:37,509 --> 00:01:39,163 where I keep bugging you until I get what I want. 47 00:01:39,207 --> 00:01:41,339 So it's just a normal day then? 48 00:01:41,383 --> 00:01:44,037 I got a Groupon for a beginner salsa class, 49 00:01:44,081 --> 00:01:46,518 and I didn't realize I have to bring my own partner. 50 00:01:46,562 --> 00:01:49,521 I thought "BYOP" meant "bring your own paella." 51 00:01:50,522 --> 00:01:52,176 Couple things. Uh, that's something you should be doing 52 00:01:52,220 --> 00:01:54,004 with your boyfriend, and... 53 00:01:54,047 --> 00:01:55,571 No, it's just the one thing. 54 00:01:55,614 --> 00:01:57,486 Well, I can't ask Oscar. 55 00:01:57,529 --> 00:01:59,401 I'm trying to get good at it before I go dancing with him. 56 00:01:59,444 --> 00:02:01,185 You can't ask the person you're trying to impress 57 00:02:01,229 --> 00:02:02,839 to help you impress them. 58 00:02:02,882 --> 00:02:04,319 Max, please? 59 00:02:04,362 --> 00:02:06,190 You'll be fine. You're a good dancer. 60 00:02:06,234 --> 00:02:07,844 Yeah, but I've never done salsa. 61 00:02:07,887 --> 00:02:09,802 And he used to do it with his ex-girlfriend, 62 00:02:09,846 --> 00:02:12,414 so, in my mind, it's like she's challenged me to a dance battle, 63 00:02:12,457 --> 00:02:14,242 which I cannot lose. 64 00:02:14,285 --> 00:02:16,200 I'm really sorry, Kat, but I'm already a good salsa dancer. 65 00:02:16,244 --> 00:02:18,811 So taking a beginner class sounds muyboring. 66 00:02:18,855 --> 00:02:20,639 Wait, you salsa? 67 00:02:20,683 --> 00:02:22,511 Mm-hmm. I picked it up when I was living in Barcelona. 68 00:02:22,554 --> 00:02:24,948 Brigitte and I would hit the salsa clubs all the time. 69 00:02:24,991 --> 00:02:27,472 We were known as les meilleurs à la salsa. 70 00:02:27,516 --> 00:02:29,866 Wh-What does that mean? 71 00:02:29,909 --> 00:02:32,260 It means our chemistry electrified the dance floor 72 00:02:32,303 --> 00:02:33,609 and people would stare, 73 00:02:33,652 --> 00:02:35,611 wishing they were us. 74 00:02:35,654 --> 00:02:37,526 That little phrase means all that? 75 00:02:40,268 --> 00:02:42,531 Well, if you're so advanced, why don't you teach me then? 76 00:02:42,574 --> 00:02:44,097 You've been saying you want to do more tutoring. 77 00:02:44,141 --> 00:02:45,229 Tutor away! 78 00:02:45,273 --> 00:02:46,404 Show me all your salsa moves-- 79 00:02:46,448 --> 00:02:48,667 mild, medium and extra spicy. 80 00:02:48,711 --> 00:02:50,016 Come on, Max. 81 00:02:50,060 --> 00:02:51,235 Just, like, two lessons. 82 00:02:51,279 --> 00:02:52,758 Uh, I don't think so. 83 00:02:54,151 --> 00:02:55,761 Oh, I get it. 84 00:02:55,805 --> 00:02:56,893 Get what? 85 00:02:56,936 --> 00:02:58,895 You don't know how to salsa. 86 00:02:58,938 --> 00:03:01,027 -[scoffs] -You lied about it to get out 87 00:03:01,071 --> 00:03:03,595 of going to the class and now you're just doubling down. 88 00:03:03,639 --> 00:03:04,944 I know how to salsa. 89 00:03:04,988 --> 00:03:06,468 Yeah, I-I don't think you do. 90 00:03:06,511 --> 00:03:08,383 I mean, I've watched a lot of videos, 91 00:03:08,426 --> 00:03:11,168 and you can just tell when someone has that salsa de fuego. 92 00:03:11,212 --> 00:03:13,257 Oh, I have the salsa de fuego, 93 00:03:13,301 --> 00:03:14,998 and it is muy caliente. 94 00:03:15,041 --> 00:03:16,347 Tonight. 95 00:03:16,391 --> 00:03:17,348 At 8:00. 96 00:03:17,392 --> 00:03:18,654 Okay then. 97 00:03:18,697 --> 00:03:20,264 Tonight at 8:00. 98 00:03:20,308 --> 00:03:21,787 I'll believe it when I see it. 99 00:03:21,831 --> 00:03:24,050 [chuckles] 100 00:03:25,226 --> 00:03:28,011 Randi, honey, I'd be careful drinking that much caffeine. 101 00:03:28,054 --> 00:03:32,320 That's how we induce labor if a sow's past her due date. 102 00:03:32,363 --> 00:03:34,191 I didn't sleep at all last night. 103 00:03:34,235 --> 00:03:35,627 I tried counting sheep, 104 00:03:35,671 --> 00:03:37,063 but then they all had Daniel's face, 105 00:03:37,107 --> 00:03:38,848 and I got so mad. 106 00:03:38,891 --> 00:03:41,285 You want one of my mama's sleeping pills? 107 00:03:41,329 --> 00:03:43,287 She left some at my house. 108 00:03:43,331 --> 00:03:45,202 I always wait till she's zonked-out on one 109 00:03:45,246 --> 00:03:48,031 before I cut her toenails or she might kick me. 110 00:03:48,074 --> 00:03:49,293 See this tooth? 111 00:03:49,337 --> 00:03:50,555 Fake. 112 00:03:52,078 --> 00:03:54,298 I'm willing to try anything at this point. 113 00:03:54,342 --> 00:03:55,691 Okay, I'll bring some tomorrow. 114 00:03:55,734 --> 00:03:57,127 But you be careful. 115 00:03:57,170 --> 00:03:59,129 I took one on a flight to Lubbock. 116 00:03:59,172 --> 00:04:00,826 I thought I went to the bathroom. 117 00:04:00,870 --> 00:04:02,698 I actually peed in the middle of the aisle. 118 00:04:02,741 --> 00:04:04,613 Had to spend the rest of the flight zip-tied 119 00:04:04,656 --> 00:04:06,136 to my tray table. 120 00:04:07,790 --> 00:04:09,487 Hey, Randi. Check it out. 121 00:04:09,531 --> 00:04:12,447 I just got the cutest dress to go dancing with Oscar. 122 00:04:12,490 --> 00:04:14,362 Ooh, that's hot. 123 00:04:14,405 --> 00:04:16,538 But you know that thing's not gonna make you dance any better. 124 00:04:16,581 --> 00:04:18,496 It's not like the suit from Iron Man. 125 00:04:18,540 --> 00:04:20,411 Yes, I've got that covered. 126 00:04:20,455 --> 00:04:22,065 Max is gonna teach me. 127 00:04:22,108 --> 00:04:24,372 Uh, do you really think that's a good idea, 128 00:04:24,415 --> 00:04:26,199 considering that you've had a crush on Max 129 00:04:26,243 --> 00:04:28,027 -for the past two decades? -[sighs] 130 00:04:28,071 --> 00:04:30,203 I've given it a lot of thought, and here's why it's fine. 131 00:04:30,247 --> 00:04:32,249 I'm completely falling for Oscar. 132 00:04:32,293 --> 00:04:34,207 So, right now, every other man in the world 133 00:04:34,251 --> 00:04:36,732 is just a sexless "blech" in a baseball cap. 134 00:04:37,907 --> 00:04:39,387 Oh, uh, not you. 135 00:04:39,430 --> 00:04:40,518 Not him. 136 00:04:40,562 --> 00:04:41,998 He's not a sexless "blech." 137 00:04:42,041 --> 00:04:44,217 -[mouths] -[Phil shrieks] 138 00:04:44,261 --> 00:04:45,828 Oh, my Lord, child, it's a miracle. 139 00:04:45,871 --> 00:04:47,525 -What, Phil? -What's a miracle? 140 00:04:47,569 --> 00:04:50,485 This bun looks exactly like the Holy Mother herself. 141 00:04:51,486 --> 00:04:52,922 Looks like Dolly Parton. 142 00:04:52,965 --> 00:04:53,923 Exactly! 143 00:04:53,966 --> 00:04:56,142 That's what I said. 144 00:04:56,186 --> 00:04:57,492 Did you bake it like that on purpose? 145 00:04:57,535 --> 00:05:00,495 No! She just magically appeared. 146 00:05:00,538 --> 00:05:02,192 The spitting image 147 00:05:02,235 --> 00:05:06,805 of Dolly from the October 1978 cover of Playboy. 148 00:05:06,849 --> 00:05:08,590 I remember, 'cause that's the only time 149 00:05:08,633 --> 00:05:10,679 -I bought that filthy magazine. -[Kat chuckles] 150 00:05:13,421 --> 00:05:15,597 [salsa music playing softly] 151 00:05:16,902 --> 00:05:18,426 Now, 152 00:05:18,469 --> 00:05:19,949 I want you to imagine a string coming out 153 00:05:19,992 --> 00:05:21,603 of the top of your head, like a puppet. 154 00:05:21,646 --> 00:05:23,300 Ooh, I like marionettes. 155 00:05:23,344 --> 00:05:24,910 I still have my favorite, Lady Juniper, upstairs. 156 00:05:24,954 --> 00:05:26,259 -Kat, I don't care. -Okay. 157 00:05:26,303 --> 00:05:27,696 Now... 158 00:05:27,739 --> 00:05:29,872 [inhales] think about the string 159 00:05:29,915 --> 00:05:30,873 and look at me. 160 00:05:30,916 --> 00:05:32,744 [laughs] 161 00:05:32,788 --> 00:05:34,398 -What? -I'm sorry. 162 00:05:34,442 --> 00:05:36,269 I'm just having a laugh. 163 00:05:36,313 --> 00:05:37,662 'Cause, like, I'm looking at you but, like, we're staring... 164 00:05:37,706 --> 00:05:39,098 Kat, be serious. 165 00:05:39,142 --> 00:05:41,013 With salsa, eye contact is the way 166 00:05:41,057 --> 00:05:42,711 -to connect with your partner. -Okay. 167 00:05:42,754 --> 00:05:44,452 -[inhales] -Huh? 168 00:05:44,495 --> 00:05:45,931 -I'm gonna be looking at you... -Mm-hmm. 169 00:05:45,975 --> 00:05:47,629 but I'm gonna be thinking about cats. 170 00:05:47,672 --> 00:05:49,935 -Don't think about cats. -Oh, it's already happening. 171 00:05:49,979 --> 00:05:50,980 ♪ 172 00:05:51,023 --> 00:05:52,590 Focus. 173 00:05:52,634 --> 00:05:53,852 Listen to the music. 174 00:05:53,896 --> 00:05:55,419 Okay. 175 00:05:55,463 --> 00:05:56,942 There you go. You're getting it. 176 00:05:56,986 --> 00:05:58,553 Oh, look at me. 177 00:05:58,596 --> 00:06:00,163 Making my salsa. 178 00:06:00,206 --> 00:06:01,512 Chopping my onions. 179 00:06:01,556 --> 00:06:03,384 Adding my lime juice. [giggling] 180 00:06:03,427 --> 00:06:05,429 What did I say about jokes? 181 00:06:05,473 --> 00:06:07,126 Not to make them. 182 00:06:07,170 --> 00:06:09,172 And what did I say about eye contact? 183 00:06:09,215 --> 00:06:11,087 To have it. 184 00:06:11,130 --> 00:06:12,218 Good. 185 00:06:12,262 --> 00:06:14,090 Now... 186 00:06:14,133 --> 00:06:15,874 keep the hips moving in time. 187 00:06:15,918 --> 00:06:18,050 Feel the rhythm 188 00:06:18,094 --> 00:06:20,836 and let my body tell your body where it should go. 189 00:06:20,879 --> 00:06:22,403 ♪ 190 00:06:25,362 --> 00:06:27,625 ["Swift Cubano" by Juan Zavala and Eddie Grey playing] 191 00:06:34,589 --> 00:06:36,242 ♪ 192 00:06:46,339 --> 00:06:48,864 Remember when I didn't think Max teaching me would be a problem? 193 00:06:48,907 --> 00:06:50,953 I'm starting to see the problem. 194 00:06:51,910 --> 00:06:53,869 Problem solved. 195 00:06:53,912 --> 00:06:56,001 [pants] Where'd that come from? 196 00:06:56,045 --> 00:06:57,307 From me. 197 00:06:57,350 --> 00:06:58,743 Feeling the rhythm, 198 00:06:58,787 --> 00:07:00,528 telling my body where it should go. 199 00:07:00,571 --> 00:07:02,225 -[chuckles] -[grunts] 200 00:07:07,665 --> 00:07:09,711 Randi, it's 1:00 in the morning. What are you doing out here? 201 00:07:09,754 --> 00:07:12,627 [chuckles] I couldn't sleep, so I figured I'd go for a run. 202 00:07:12,670 --> 00:07:14,585 Sounds like you got ex-somnia. 203 00:07:14,629 --> 00:07:16,413 Don't you mean "insomnia"? 204 00:07:16,457 --> 00:07:19,155 If you're thinking about your ex, it's ex-somnia. 205 00:07:19,198 --> 00:07:21,636 Yeah, well, then that's what I got. 206 00:07:21,679 --> 00:07:23,551 You know, I've been trying online blackjack 207 00:07:23,594 --> 00:07:25,117 for my ex-somnia. 208 00:07:25,161 --> 00:07:26,858 Getting my drink on helps a little bit, too. 209 00:07:26,902 --> 00:07:28,686 Yeah. 210 00:07:28,730 --> 00:07:30,471 You might be right. 211 00:07:30,514 --> 00:07:32,081 I think I'm gonna go check out this cute little bar 212 00:07:32,124 --> 00:07:33,604 that's still open down the street. 213 00:07:33,648 --> 00:07:36,302 -Jog your ass in here. -[chuckles] 214 00:07:38,566 --> 00:07:41,351 Mother, did you get my message about Phil's Dolly bun? 215 00:07:41,394 --> 00:07:42,744 Why do you think I'm here? 216 00:07:42,787 --> 00:07:45,529 Oh, Phil, my pageant friend Jeannie 217 00:07:45,573 --> 00:07:47,444 is Dolly's new publicist, 218 00:07:47,488 --> 00:07:49,533 so I shared the picture with her on Insta, 219 00:07:49,577 --> 00:07:51,448 and she showed it to Dolly. 220 00:07:51,492 --> 00:07:52,623 Oh, Sheila. 221 00:07:52,667 --> 00:07:54,495 If you are pulling my leg, 222 00:07:54,538 --> 00:07:58,542 I'll cut yours off and slap you across the face with it. 223 00:07:58,586 --> 00:08:00,370 I am not kidding! 224 00:08:00,413 --> 00:08:02,720 And she said Dolly's performing tonight at the Opry 225 00:08:02,764 --> 00:08:04,330 and if we can get down to Nashville, 226 00:08:04,374 --> 00:08:06,985 she'll take a picture with us and the bun 227 00:08:07,029 --> 00:08:08,465 after the show. 228 00:08:08,509 --> 00:08:10,554 Meeting Dolly's on my whistle list. 229 00:08:10,598 --> 00:08:12,774 I worship the ground she walks on. 230 00:08:12,817 --> 00:08:15,167 [squealing] 231 00:08:15,211 --> 00:08:17,605 Oh, Kat! Please, can I leave? 232 00:08:17,648 --> 00:08:21,130 Of course. You can't pass up an opportunity like that. 233 00:08:21,173 --> 00:08:23,175 And don't forget to tell Dolly Parton about Dolly Purr-ton. 234 00:08:23,219 --> 00:08:24,568 PHIL: Oh, thank you! 235 00:08:24,612 --> 00:08:27,005 Thank you, thank you! 236 00:08:27,049 --> 00:08:28,877 -Hey. -Hey. 237 00:08:28,920 --> 00:08:30,879 I'm, uh, literally sore. 238 00:08:30,922 --> 00:08:32,358 Like I worked out last night. 239 00:08:32,402 --> 00:08:34,099 -Like I did leg day. -[chuckles] 240 00:08:34,143 --> 00:08:35,579 Can you stop smiling at me like that? 241 00:08:35,623 --> 00:08:37,189 You're making me feel exposed. 242 00:08:37,233 --> 00:08:38,582 I'll try. 243 00:08:38,626 --> 00:08:40,584 -Nope, not possible. -[laughs] 244 00:08:40,628 --> 00:08:43,195 Uh, and I have class tonight, so I won't see you. 245 00:08:43,239 --> 00:08:44,327 But I will be thinking of you 246 00:08:44,370 --> 00:08:45,807 and thinking of last night. 247 00:08:45,850 --> 00:08:47,460 Well, I can't stop you from thinking, 248 00:08:47,504 --> 00:08:48,897 so think away. 249 00:08:48,940 --> 00:08:50,681 [chuckles] 250 00:08:50,725 --> 00:08:52,770 Randi. Randi. 251 00:08:52,814 --> 00:08:54,685 Can I run a moral quandary by you? 252 00:08:54,729 --> 00:08:57,166 You know how I had that salsa lesson with Max last night? 253 00:08:57,209 --> 00:08:59,124 -Uh-huh. -Well, afterward, 254 00:08:59,168 --> 00:09:03,389 I had a particularly sensual, consensual evening with Oscar. 255 00:09:03,433 --> 00:09:05,478 Kat, we're roomies. I heard everything. 256 00:09:05,522 --> 00:09:07,132 It sounded like y'all was installing hardwood floors 257 00:09:07,176 --> 00:09:08,133 in there. 258 00:09:08,177 --> 00:09:09,918 Okay. 259 00:09:09,961 --> 00:09:11,441 Not embarrassed by that at all. 260 00:09:11,484 --> 00:09:13,051 Well, I-I'm feeling a little guilty 261 00:09:13,095 --> 00:09:15,097 because I think I may have transferred some 262 00:09:15,140 --> 00:09:17,360 of the spiciness of salsa with Max to Oscar. 263 00:09:17,403 --> 00:09:18,709 It was just really... 264 00:09:18,753 --> 00:09:20,363 Wh-What was that for? 265 00:09:20,406 --> 00:09:21,843 I told you you were playing with fire. 266 00:09:21,886 --> 00:09:23,409 I had to put you out. 267 00:09:24,410 --> 00:09:26,108 Okay, but I-I don't want to be with Max. 268 00:09:26,151 --> 00:09:27,631 I want to be with Oscar. 269 00:09:27,675 --> 00:09:29,502 The problem is you didn't tell Oscar 270 00:09:29,546 --> 00:09:30,895 that you were dancing with Max. 271 00:09:30,939 --> 00:09:32,636 -[sighs] -Or getting heated up by Max. 272 00:09:32,680 --> 00:09:34,333 And unless you're planning a surprise party, 273 00:09:34,377 --> 00:09:36,335 you should hide nothing from your partner. 274 00:09:36,379 --> 00:09:37,336 Okay, but what... 275 00:09:37,380 --> 00:09:39,034 Nothing. 276 00:09:41,036 --> 00:09:42,167 Hey, teach. 277 00:09:42,211 --> 00:09:43,865 Great dance lesson last night. 278 00:09:43,908 --> 00:09:46,215 Thank you, thank you. Great learning last night. 279 00:09:46,258 --> 00:09:48,086 [chuckles] 280 00:09:48,130 --> 00:09:50,480 -I actually have to cancel... -I have to cancel tonight. 281 00:09:50,523 --> 00:09:52,482 -Why can't you make... [laughs] -Why can't you make... [laughs] 282 00:09:52,525 --> 00:09:54,005 You go first. 283 00:09:54,049 --> 00:09:56,007 Well, honestly... 284 00:09:56,051 --> 00:09:58,531 it felt a little bit like I was cheating on Oscar. 285 00:09:58,575 --> 00:10:00,011 Like, 'cause I was dancing 286 00:10:00,055 --> 00:10:02,013 with another guy. Even though it's you. 287 00:10:02,057 --> 00:10:03,754 Yeah, no, that makes sense. I felt a little weird, too. 288 00:10:03,798 --> 00:10:05,408 -Especially 'cause it's salsa. -[exhales] 289 00:10:05,451 --> 00:10:07,236 Exactly. Like, if it were polka, 290 00:10:07,279 --> 00:10:09,194 we wouldn't even be having this conversation, you know? 291 00:10:09,238 --> 00:10:11,806 Polka's a lot more oom-pah-pah, a lot less "ooh, papi." 292 00:10:11,849 --> 00:10:13,677 [chuckles] 293 00:10:14,722 --> 00:10:16,071 You know what would be great? 294 00:10:16,114 --> 00:10:17,768 -Hmm? -Is if you had a girlfriend 295 00:10:17,812 --> 00:10:19,683 and the four of us could all go dancing together. 296 00:10:19,727 --> 00:10:20,771 You know? Get on that. 297 00:10:20,815 --> 00:10:21,816 Get yourself a girlfriend. 298 00:10:21,859 --> 00:10:23,426 Well, I'm working on it. 299 00:10:23,469 --> 00:10:26,168 -Oh, really? With who? -With Brigitte. 300 00:10:26,211 --> 00:10:28,431 I'm actually making a little progress on that front. 301 00:10:28,474 --> 00:10:30,651 Oh. That's great. 302 00:10:30,694 --> 00:10:32,478 Yeah, in fact, I'm thinking about surprising her 303 00:10:32,522 --> 00:10:33,654 in Paris this summer. 304 00:10:33,697 --> 00:10:34,742 Like... [inhales] 305 00:10:34,785 --> 00:10:36,569 Like, a big, grand gesture. 306 00:10:36,613 --> 00:10:38,223 Probably something on the Eiffel Tower. 307 00:10:38,267 --> 00:10:40,269 Wow, that sounds so romantic. 308 00:10:40,312 --> 00:10:42,271 That way, if she rejects me, you know, I can just... 309 00:10:42,314 --> 00:10:43,533 boop. 310 00:10:44,534 --> 00:10:46,231 You're gonna push her off? 311 00:10:46,275 --> 00:10:48,233 I'm just saying, it gets windy up there. 312 00:10:48,277 --> 00:10:50,235 [laughs] 313 00:10:50,279 --> 00:10:52,542 Your friend says that when we get to the Opry, 314 00:10:52,585 --> 00:10:54,936 we give the password to the security guard. 315 00:10:54,979 --> 00:10:57,025 "Hard Candy Christmas." 316 00:10:57,068 --> 00:10:58,722 Then we can pull 317 00:10:58,766 --> 00:11:00,855 right up to her tour bus! [chuckles] 318 00:11:00,898 --> 00:11:02,334 [both squeal] 319 00:11:02,378 --> 00:11:03,858 -[chuckles] -You know, I never told 320 00:11:03,901 --> 00:11:05,468 Katharine, but... 321 00:11:05,511 --> 00:11:08,036 I had a bit of the baby blues after I had her. 322 00:11:08,079 --> 00:11:09,733 So I would play Dolly's 323 00:11:09,777 --> 00:11:11,953 "I Will Always Love You" on a loop 324 00:11:11,996 --> 00:11:15,304 to remind me how I was supposed to feel about my baby. 325 00:11:15,347 --> 00:11:18,873 And eventually, I did. 326 00:11:18,916 --> 00:11:22,485 The song that got to me was "Coat of Many Colors." 327 00:11:22,528 --> 00:11:24,052 If I ever opened a bakery, 328 00:11:24,095 --> 00:11:27,011 I was gonna call it Coat of Many Crullers. 329 00:11:28,534 --> 00:11:30,406 Guess what our hours were gonna be. 330 00:11:30,449 --> 00:11:31,755 9:00 to 5:00? 331 00:11:31,799 --> 00:11:33,496 Bingo. [laughing] 332 00:11:33,539 --> 00:11:35,716 [laughs] 333 00:11:35,759 --> 00:11:37,500 Oh, oh. Uh-oh. 334 00:11:37,543 --> 00:11:39,632 Looks like we're hitting a bit of traffic. 335 00:11:39,676 --> 00:11:41,417 Oh, it's probably just a bend in the road. 336 00:11:41,460 --> 00:11:43,419 Nothing to worry about. 337 00:11:43,462 --> 00:11:45,508 [siren wailing] 338 00:11:49,991 --> 00:11:51,514 Nope. 339 00:11:51,557 --> 00:11:53,908 Still not gonna worry. 340 00:11:55,126 --> 00:11:57,694 [sighs] I have been watching salsa videos 341 00:11:57,738 --> 00:11:59,217 for the past three hours. 342 00:11:59,261 --> 00:12:00,784 It started with instructional videos, 343 00:12:00,828 --> 00:12:02,699 but then it turned into salsa fails. 344 00:12:02,743 --> 00:12:04,875 I watched a guy try and salsa with a kangaroo. 345 00:12:04,919 --> 00:12:06,964 The kangaroo was not having it. 346 00:12:07,008 --> 00:12:09,706 Grabbed that guy by the collar, kicked him right in the nuts. 347 00:12:09,750 --> 00:12:11,664 Ooh, that sounds horrible. 348 00:12:11,708 --> 00:12:13,405 Can you send me that video? 349 00:12:13,449 --> 00:12:15,407 Yeah, no problem. 350 00:12:15,451 --> 00:12:17,670 Every time I close my eyes, I see salsa fails. 351 00:12:17,714 --> 00:12:19,194 I don't know how I'm gonna get to sleep. 352 00:12:19,237 --> 00:12:20,804 Oscar's working. 353 00:12:20,848 --> 00:12:23,154 I don't know why I'm looking in the fridge. 354 00:12:23,198 --> 00:12:24,416 Hey, do you want to watch 355 00:12:24,460 --> 00:12:25,896 a movie with the sound off 356 00:12:25,940 --> 00:12:27,550 and make the people say whatever we want? 357 00:12:27,593 --> 00:12:29,639 Uh, no, I'm okay. I'm gonna go for a run. 358 00:12:29,682 --> 00:12:31,206 They've been helping me relax. 359 00:12:31,249 --> 00:12:32,903 Hmm. I don't like you running at night. 360 00:12:32,947 --> 00:12:34,731 You know, I have a holiday sweater 361 00:12:34,775 --> 00:12:36,646 that has real lights on it that you could wear. 362 00:12:36,689 --> 00:12:38,256 Oh, but then you'd be running in an itchy sweater. 363 00:12:38,300 --> 00:12:39,867 Never mind. Have fun. 364 00:12:39,910 --> 00:12:41,520 [chuckles]: Don't worry, I'm not going that far. 365 00:12:41,564 --> 00:12:43,305 And if you're having problems getting to sleep, 366 00:12:43,348 --> 00:12:45,960 why don't you take one of Phil's mama's sleeping pills. 367 00:12:46,003 --> 00:12:47,744 -Oh. All right. -All right. 368 00:12:47,788 --> 00:12:49,180 -Have a good time. -[door opens] 369 00:12:49,224 --> 00:12:51,008 -Have a good night. Bye. -Be safe. 370 00:12:53,706 --> 00:12:55,491 "Take as needed"? 371 00:12:55,534 --> 00:12:57,232 Hmm. 372 00:12:59,887 --> 00:13:03,716 [snoring] 373 00:13:03,760 --> 00:13:05,762 BRIGITTE: Wake up, cheater. 374 00:13:07,764 --> 00:13:09,331 Brigitte? 375 00:13:09,374 --> 00:13:10,985 What are you doing here? 376 00:13:11,028 --> 00:13:12,595 I am very mad at you. 377 00:13:12,638 --> 00:13:16,207 You have been dancing with my boyfriend. 378 00:13:23,258 --> 00:13:25,869 I told him I am not dancing with him anymore. 379 00:13:25,913 --> 00:13:27,523 Oh! 380 00:13:27,566 --> 00:13:29,481 I even told him that I wished that you were here 381 00:13:29,525 --> 00:13:30,874 so we could all hang out together. 382 00:13:30,918 --> 00:13:32,397 That is very generous. 383 00:13:32,441 --> 00:13:35,096 I like you on sleeping pills. [chuckles] 384 00:13:35,139 --> 00:13:36,967 I don't think they're working. I'm not even tired. 385 00:13:37,011 --> 00:13:39,143 Mm. 386 00:13:39,187 --> 00:13:40,666 You know, I found your therapy website. 387 00:13:40,710 --> 00:13:43,191 I see your name. I see your e-mail address. 388 00:13:43,234 --> 00:13:44,801 But I don't see any pictures of you 389 00:13:44,845 --> 00:13:46,585 'cause Max said you have so many stalkers. 390 00:13:46,629 --> 00:13:49,937 Yes. I even tried to post a weird one of me mid-sneeze. 391 00:13:49,980 --> 00:13:52,156 -But no. The stalking continued. -Mm. 392 00:13:52,200 --> 00:13:54,028 I see a picture, oh, of a happy couple 393 00:13:54,071 --> 00:13:55,290 staring at a waterfall. 394 00:13:55,333 --> 00:13:57,074 You know... [smacks lips] 395 00:13:57,118 --> 00:13:58,684 That makes me thirsty. That makes me want root beer. 396 00:13:58,728 --> 00:14:00,208 Do you want some root beer? I got a guy. 397 00:14:00,251 --> 00:14:01,687 I would love root beer 398 00:14:01,731 --> 00:14:02,863 -if it tastes like wine. -You know what? 399 00:14:02,906 --> 00:14:04,690 I'll just get you some wine. 400 00:14:04,734 --> 00:14:06,736 Then you are picking up what I am putting down. 401 00:14:06,779 --> 00:14:07,955 [laughs] 402 00:14:10,566 --> 00:14:11,828 [horns honking] 403 00:14:11,872 --> 00:14:13,221 -[phone chimes] -Ah. 404 00:14:13,264 --> 00:14:14,831 Oh, your friend says 405 00:14:14,875 --> 00:14:17,051 that Dolly is halfway through her set. 406 00:14:17,094 --> 00:14:20,750 If things pick up, we could still make it. 407 00:14:20,793 --> 00:14:23,622 -I'm starving, Phil. -Me, too. 408 00:14:23,666 --> 00:14:25,581 I have an antacid 409 00:14:25,624 --> 00:14:27,888 that I was not gonna tell you about. 410 00:14:29,019 --> 00:14:31,413 But I will split it with you. 411 00:14:31,456 --> 00:14:35,156 You know, if we're stuck here much longer, we could... 412 00:14:35,199 --> 00:14:37,158 Do not even think about it, Sheila. 413 00:14:37,201 --> 00:14:40,509 I'll slice you like a Honey Baked Ham. 414 00:14:42,337 --> 00:14:45,122 You just lost your half. 415 00:14:49,083 --> 00:14:50,562 Okay, so, 416 00:14:50,606 --> 00:14:52,216 -you have to split those eights. -Okay. 417 00:14:52,260 --> 00:14:53,435 Okay, now hit here. 418 00:14:53,478 --> 00:14:55,959 Stay. Now hit this one. 419 00:14:56,003 --> 00:14:57,918 -Ooh, that's what I'm talking about. -[chuckles] 420 00:14:57,961 --> 00:14:59,963 Told you. My grandpa taught me how to play blackjack. 421 00:15:00,007 --> 00:15:02,313 It's how I put myself through grade school. 422 00:15:02,357 --> 00:15:04,228 [chuckles] I kept trying to get Daniel 423 00:15:04,272 --> 00:15:05,751 to go down to the riverboat with me, but he kept saying, 424 00:15:05,795 --> 00:15:07,753 "Gambling is a frivolous waste of money." 425 00:15:07,797 --> 00:15:09,668 You know, the more I think about it, 426 00:15:09,712 --> 00:15:12,541 the more I realize that he had a big old stick up his butt. 427 00:15:12,584 --> 00:15:14,499 You need to be with somebody easygoing 428 00:15:14,543 --> 00:15:16,284 and knows how to have fun like you do. 429 00:15:16,327 --> 00:15:18,242 Mm-mm. Randi doesn't need to be 430 00:15:18,286 --> 00:15:20,418 with anybody but Randi right now. 431 00:15:20,462 --> 00:15:22,594 I get that. And Carter is only dating Carter 432 00:15:22,638 --> 00:15:24,857 -for a while. -[chuckles]: And why is that? 433 00:15:24,901 --> 00:15:27,077 'Cause CJ can't stand his mom's new boyfriend. 434 00:15:27,121 --> 00:15:28,731 And listening to him complain about that dude 435 00:15:28,774 --> 00:15:30,080 is the best part of my weekend. 436 00:15:30,124 --> 00:15:31,821 -[laughs] -Yeah. I can't 437 00:15:31,864 --> 00:15:32,996 get a girlfriend and give Stephanie 438 00:15:33,040 --> 00:15:34,737 that same satisfaction. 439 00:15:34,780 --> 00:15:36,652 Yeah. Yeah. You know, I just need 440 00:15:36,695 --> 00:15:39,960 to start having some fun where feelings don't ruin it. 441 00:15:40,961 --> 00:15:43,615 Like a friends with benefits type situation? 442 00:15:43,659 --> 00:15:47,924 Well, I don't know if that ever really works out for anybody. 443 00:15:47,968 --> 00:15:51,232 Yeah. It's the kind of thing you dream about, though. 444 00:15:51,275 --> 00:15:52,798 [banging at door] 445 00:15:54,539 --> 00:15:55,976 Uh-oh, busted. 446 00:16:00,241 --> 00:16:01,938 Hey, Kat. What's going on? 447 00:16:01,982 --> 00:16:03,766 RANDI: Hey. 448 00:16:03,809 --> 00:16:06,073 Uh, are you okay, Kat? 449 00:16:06,116 --> 00:16:08,597 ♪ Everybody dance now.♪ 450 00:16:10,947 --> 00:16:12,253 Uh... 451 00:16:20,261 --> 00:16:21,610 Kat. 452 00:16:21,653 --> 00:16:23,046 You don't even see me. 453 00:16:23,090 --> 00:16:26,006 ♪ Root beer is the best beer.♪ 454 00:16:27,833 --> 00:16:29,922 Uh-oh. She must have taken 455 00:16:29,966 --> 00:16:31,185 one of Phil's mama's sleeping pills, 456 00:16:31,228 --> 00:16:32,316 and she's having a reaction. 457 00:16:32,360 --> 00:16:34,623 You mean tripping her balls off. 458 00:16:34,666 --> 00:16:35,972 I'm gonna make sure she gets home okay. 459 00:16:36,016 --> 00:16:37,974 Okay. Okay. 460 00:16:38,018 --> 00:16:39,628 Damn. 461 00:16:39,671 --> 00:16:42,370 I just got Kat-blocked. 462 00:16:49,812 --> 00:16:51,770 Hey. I brought you some coffee. 463 00:16:51,814 --> 00:16:53,729 What happened in here? 464 00:16:53,772 --> 00:16:55,470 Uh, you did. 465 00:16:55,513 --> 00:16:58,081 You were sleepwalking last night. 466 00:16:58,125 --> 00:17:00,388 After my run, I found you trying to get into the Middle C. 467 00:17:00,431 --> 00:17:02,042 I was sleepwalking? 468 00:17:02,085 --> 00:17:04,174 Yeah, you were. And then, when I brought you back, 469 00:17:04,218 --> 00:17:06,220 you insisted that we bring all the cats upstairs 470 00:17:06,263 --> 00:17:07,873 because they had never seen your room 471 00:17:07,917 --> 00:17:10,267 and you wanted to sleep under a cat blanket. 472 00:17:11,964 --> 00:17:14,010 Uh, it must have been the sleeping pills, 473 00:17:14,054 --> 00:17:15,925 'cause I don't remember any of that. 474 00:17:15,968 --> 00:17:17,796 Any of it? 475 00:17:17,840 --> 00:17:19,581 Like, like, none of it? 476 00:17:19,624 --> 00:17:22,149 I vaguely remember braiding Brigitte's hair, 477 00:17:22,192 --> 00:17:23,628 but that's it. 478 00:17:23,672 --> 00:17:25,587 Wait, Max's ex-girlfriend, Brigitte? 479 00:17:25,630 --> 00:17:28,546 Never mind. Hey, Mr. Mousekers, this is my hand-carved bed. 480 00:17:28,590 --> 00:17:30,026 It's been passed down for generations. 481 00:17:30,070 --> 00:17:31,593 And you remember Randi. 482 00:17:31,636 --> 00:17:33,682 [yawning]: From downstairs. 483 00:17:36,119 --> 00:17:39,122 I can't believe we missed her. 484 00:17:39,166 --> 00:17:41,994 I can't believe we urinated in front of each other. 485 00:17:42,038 --> 00:17:44,084 Twice. 486 00:17:45,694 --> 00:17:48,827 I'm still hungry, Phil. 487 00:17:48,871 --> 00:17:50,655 Me, too. I'm so delirious, 488 00:17:50,699 --> 00:17:53,745 I thought I saw Dolly in the mirror a minute ago. 489 00:17:53,789 --> 00:17:56,618 Maybe she was sending us a sign. 490 00:17:56,661 --> 00:17:59,273 She'd want us to eat her. 491 00:18:08,282 --> 00:18:10,197 -Mmm. -Mmm. 492 00:18:10,240 --> 00:18:12,677 -She's inside of us now. -Mm-hmm. 493 00:18:12,721 --> 00:18:14,549 She's nourishing us 494 00:18:14,592 --> 00:18:18,161 like she nourished us our entire lives. 495 00:18:18,205 --> 00:18:20,511 It'll remind us to be more like Dolly. 496 00:18:20,555 --> 00:18:21,991 To be kinder. 497 00:18:22,034 --> 00:18:23,427 To be more generous. 498 00:18:23,471 --> 00:18:24,646 [phone chimes] 499 00:18:24,689 --> 00:18:26,909 Oh. It's Jeannie. 500 00:18:26,952 --> 00:18:29,172 Mm. Oh, she says Dolly's decided to do 501 00:18:29,216 --> 00:18:30,956 a second night at the Opry. 502 00:18:31,000 --> 00:18:33,655 Mm, so we can take our time getting there. 503 00:18:33,698 --> 00:18:35,700 Spit it out. 504 00:18:35,744 --> 00:18:37,876 -Hmm? -Spit it out right now, 505 00:18:37,920 --> 00:18:39,835 or I'll reach in there and I'll pull it out. 506 00:18:39,878 --> 00:18:40,966 [squeals]: What? 507 00:18:41,010 --> 00:18:42,664 I'm gonna put her back together. 508 00:18:42,707 --> 00:18:45,754 -Mm. -I will use your saliva as the glue. 509 00:18:45,797 --> 00:18:49,627 -Mm-mm. [mutters] -Spit it out, Sheila. 510 00:18:52,195 --> 00:18:55,242 -So, you going for a run tonight? -I haven't decided. 511 00:18:55,285 --> 00:18:56,852 So, I shouldn't read too much into the fact 512 00:18:56,895 --> 00:18:58,767 that you drew a heart in my foam? 513 00:18:58,810 --> 00:19:01,117 [chuckles] It just does that when you pull the milk away. 514 00:19:01,161 --> 00:19:03,075 -Mm-hmm. -[chuckles] 515 00:19:03,119 --> 00:19:04,686 KAT: Hey. 516 00:19:04,729 --> 00:19:06,253 -Hey. You look good. -Thanks. 517 00:19:06,296 --> 00:19:07,732 -Yeah. -RANDI: Ooh! 518 00:19:07,776 --> 00:19:09,473 Kat, you look incredible, 519 00:19:09,517 --> 00:19:12,215 -whether you can salsa or not. -KAT [chuckles]: Thanks. 520 00:19:12,259 --> 00:19:13,956 I'm actually feeling really positive 521 00:19:13,999 --> 00:19:15,436 about my salsa dancing abilities. 522 00:19:15,479 --> 00:19:17,046 The lesson with Max, 523 00:19:17,089 --> 00:19:18,352 all those videos that I watched, 524 00:19:18,395 --> 00:19:19,918 it really sunk into my brain. 525 00:19:19,962 --> 00:19:21,442 Like, I woke up this morning able to do moves 526 00:19:21,485 --> 00:19:23,183 I couldn't even do yesterday. Like this. 527 00:19:23,226 --> 00:19:24,880 -RANDI: Ooh. -[chuckles] 528 00:19:24,923 --> 00:19:26,621 Ooh, and, uh, and this. 529 00:19:26,664 --> 00:19:28,710 Whoo! [chuckles] 530 00:19:28,753 --> 00:19:31,191 -Oh, hey, Max. -What the hell did you do? 531 00:19:31,234 --> 00:19:32,975 Oh, I just dipped a cat. [chuckles] 532 00:19:33,018 --> 00:19:34,803 Brigitte called me and said some American woman 533 00:19:34,846 --> 00:19:37,414 wrote her a long e-mail about how I'm a mess without her 534 00:19:37,458 --> 00:19:39,721 and I'm gonna go declare my love for her on the Eiffel Tower, 535 00:19:39,764 --> 00:19:42,419 and if she rejects me, I'm gonna push her off. 536 00:19:42,463 --> 00:19:45,466 A-And you think I did that? I didn't do that. 537 00:19:45,509 --> 00:19:46,858 Really? Because the letter was signed, 538 00:19:46,902 --> 00:19:49,470 "Have a meow-tastic day, Kat Silver." 539 00:19:50,645 --> 00:19:53,256 Well, that does very specifically narrow down 540 00:19:53,300 --> 00:19:55,911 the suspects, but how would I... 541 00:19:55,954 --> 00:19:57,304 Oh. 542 00:19:57,347 --> 00:19:58,827 I took sleeping pills last night. 543 00:19:58,870 --> 00:20:01,003 Girl, check your e-mail sent folder. 544 00:20:01,046 --> 00:20:02,483 -Oh. -[sighs] 545 00:20:03,440 --> 00:20:06,835 Oh, my gosh. Max, I am so sorry. 546 00:20:06,878 --> 00:20:09,141 Just tell her I was on drugs. It didn't mean anything. 547 00:20:09,185 --> 00:20:11,013 Well, I-I would, except she told me 548 00:20:11,056 --> 00:20:12,493 never to contact her again. 549 00:20:12,536 --> 00:20:14,103 Well, do you want me to e-mail her? 550 00:20:14,146 --> 00:20:15,583 Are you out of your mind? 551 00:20:15,626 --> 00:20:18,716 I want you to stay out of my business, Kat. 552 00:20:18,760 --> 00:20:21,676 And you know what really pisses me off? 553 00:20:21,719 --> 00:20:24,287 I tried to help you with your relationship, 554 00:20:24,331 --> 00:20:26,158 and you blew mine up. 555 00:20:31,338 --> 00:20:33,035 -I'm so sorry, Kat. -[door closes] 556 00:20:33,078 --> 00:20:34,732 I can't believe I did that. 557 00:20:34,776 --> 00:20:36,995 Well, it's not your fault. Honestly, it's Phil's. 558 00:20:37,039 --> 00:20:38,780 He's the one that gave us those damn pills 559 00:20:38,823 --> 00:20:40,303 that made him whip his wiener out on a plane 560 00:20:40,347 --> 00:20:41,565 and pee in the aisle. 561 00:20:41,609 --> 00:20:43,088 What? 562 00:20:43,132 --> 00:20:45,003 You didn't tell me that happened. 563 00:20:45,047 --> 00:20:46,527 Well, I just thought he had an overreaction 564 00:20:46,570 --> 00:20:48,268 because he's itty-bitty. 565 00:20:49,312 --> 00:20:50,835 I feel horrible. 566 00:20:50,879 --> 00:20:53,490 I've never seen Max that upset. 567 00:20:53,534 --> 00:20:55,536 What am I supposed to do? 568 00:20:55,579 --> 00:20:57,494 Hey, hey. 569 00:20:57,538 --> 00:21:00,802 Are you ready to get our salsa on? 570 00:21:01,846 --> 00:21:04,632 I just need un momento. 571 00:21:04,675 --> 00:21:07,635 ["Chipa y Fuego [salsa]" by El Swing de Nicky Catarey playing] 572 00:21:07,678 --> 00:21:09,724 ♪ 573 00:21:17,862 --> 00:21:21,344 ♪