1
00:00:25,859 --> 00:00:26,944
Fucking hell.
2
00:00:29,863 --> 00:00:31,156
All right, let's go.
3
00:00:31,156 --> 00:00:32,573
It's 4:00 a.m.
4
00:00:32,573 --> 00:00:34,701
Yeah. We start at 4:00 a.m.
5
00:00:34,701 --> 00:00:35,911
I thought you were joking.
6
00:00:35,911 --> 00:00:37,162
How is that a joke?
7
00:00:37,162 --> 00:00:38,580
'Cause it's 4:00 a.m.
8
00:00:39,581 --> 00:00:42,835
We start at 4:00, so you can do
three workouts a day instead of two.
9
00:00:43,836 --> 00:00:46,296
Okay, but it's 4:00 a.m.
10
00:00:46,880 --> 00:00:48,590
Do you wanna be better than Zava or not?
11
00:00:50,676 --> 00:00:52,719
Well, how are we gonna see? It's dark out.
12
00:00:54,721 --> 00:00:56,431
Fucking hell.
13
00:00:56,932 --> 00:00:59,560
Now get dressed.
Or I start flicking your balls.
14
00:01:00,811 --> 00:01:01,854
This is perverse.
15
00:01:34,720 --> 00:01:35,721
Whoops.
16
00:01:51,403 --> 00:01:52,529
There you go.
17
00:02:06,293 --> 00:02:07,669
Good morning, Sassy Smurf.
18
00:02:09,295 --> 00:02:11,173
Good morning, Marlboro Man.
19
00:02:12,007 --> 00:02:14,218
You know, you snored all night.
20
00:02:15,093 --> 00:02:16,178
I'm sorry about that.
21
00:02:16,678 --> 00:02:18,764
That's all right.
It's actually very soothing.
22
00:02:18,764 --> 00:02:20,057
Sounded like the sea.
23
00:02:20,057 --> 00:02:22,768
Well, I'm glad
you didn't hear any boat horns,
24
00:02:22,768 --> 00:02:25,604
given all the fried yams I ate last night.
25
00:02:30,943 --> 00:02:34,446
Hey, I was thinking.
We have a good time together, yeah?
26
00:02:34,446 --> 00:02:37,157
They're called simultaneous orgasms,
Ted, yes.
27
00:02:37,866 --> 00:02:39,743
Yeah, well, but I mean
28
00:02:39,743 --> 00:02:43,247
also all the talking and laughing
and all that stuff. Yeah?
29
00:02:43,247 --> 00:02:46,500
Sure.
Well, apart from all your dreadful puns.
30
00:02:47,376 --> 00:02:48,752
Right. Well, it's tough.
31
00:02:48,752 --> 00:02:51,797
Sometimes I just see 'em there,
and I gotta take a swing at 'em, you know?
32
00:02:52,881 --> 00:02:55,634
No, I-- Well, what I'm getting at is...
33
00:02:58,262 --> 00:02:59,930
Well, I was just thinking maybe...
34
00:03:01,181 --> 00:03:03,308
we could go on an actual date sometime.
35
00:03:04,101 --> 00:03:05,769
You know? You and me, together.
36
00:03:07,604 --> 00:03:08,814
God, no.
37
00:03:10,357 --> 00:03:12,442
Well, I appreciate you taking the time
to consider it.
38
00:03:12,442 --> 00:03:14,736
Ted, we can't date.
39
00:03:14,736 --> 00:03:15,737
Why not?
40
00:03:16,530 --> 00:03:19,074
- You're a mess.
- I'm a mess?
41
00:03:19,658 --> 00:03:20,701
Course you are.
42
00:03:20,701 --> 00:03:24,162
I'm a mess too, but I'm a mess
three years further on than you,
43
00:03:24,162 --> 00:03:26,582
so I'm more of a slight disarray.
44
00:03:26,582 --> 00:03:28,792
More like a slight disarray of sunshine,
if you ask me.
45
00:03:28,792 --> 00:03:30,210
Oh, God.
46
00:03:30,210 --> 00:03:33,839
- Sorry.
- Ted, on the day my ex got remarried,
47
00:03:33,839 --> 00:03:36,675
I drank a bottle of red wine
through a straw
48
00:03:37,426 --> 00:03:39,887
and told my Uber driver
I was in love with him.
49
00:03:39,887 --> 00:03:43,682
Then, when he dropped me home,
I puked so much,
50
00:03:43,682 --> 00:03:46,768
my mouth was like an elevator
from the goddamn Shining.
51
00:03:47,436 --> 00:03:49,646
Knocked my rating down to a 3.9.
52
00:03:49,646 --> 00:03:50,939
3.9?
53
00:03:51,982 --> 00:03:54,151
Fuck you. Why? What's yours?
54
00:03:55,819 --> 00:03:58,197
Oh, God, you're a five, aren't you?
55
00:03:59,156 --> 00:04:01,742
Course you're a five.
How the fuck are you a five?
56
00:03:59,156 --> 00:04:01,742
Course you're a five.
How the fuck are you a five?
57
00:04:01,742 --> 00:04:04,703
I don't know. I'm tidy.
I say "Please" and "Thank you."
58
00:04:04,703 --> 00:04:06,788
Sometimes I offer to drive
if they look tired.
59
00:04:08,373 --> 00:04:10,417
You are such a mess.
60
00:04:13,670 --> 00:04:16,380
Ted, I like our status.
61
00:04:18,257 --> 00:04:22,012
Friends with benefits,
like Natalie Portman and Ashton Kutcher.
62
00:04:22,596 --> 00:04:25,224
No.
I think you're thinking of 2011's other
63
00:04:25,224 --> 00:04:27,392
good-friends-turned-casual-lovers
based rom-com.
64
00:04:29,937 --> 00:04:30,771
No Strings Attached.
65
00:04:31,605 --> 00:04:34,650
Friends with Benefits
was Mila Kunis and Justin Timberlake.
66
00:04:35,234 --> 00:04:38,237
Wow. 2011, friends be fuckin'.
67
00:04:38,237 --> 00:04:39,363
Yeah.
68
00:04:39,363 --> 00:04:42,449
So, let's keep things 2011.
Cool and breezy.
69
00:04:42,950 --> 00:04:44,326
Like an Arab Spring.
70
00:04:49,206 --> 00:04:51,124
And good luck
against West Ham this weekend.
71
00:04:51,750 --> 00:04:52,751
Fuck Rupert
72
00:04:52,751 --> 00:04:56,046
and that shriveled raisin-pouch
he calls a nutsack.
73
00:05:11,812 --> 00:05:13,146
Hello! Here for Flo?
74
00:05:13,146 --> 00:05:14,940
- You can jump in, love.
- Lovely, thank you.
75
00:05:16,066 --> 00:05:18,819
This is nice. Gray seats? Yes, please.
76
00:05:18,819 --> 00:05:20,863
...West Ham. This is the real opportunity
77
00:05:20,863 --> 00:05:22,573
for the Wonder Kid
to become the Wonder Man...
78
00:05:22,573 --> 00:05:24,074
101.
79
00:05:25,409 --> 00:05:26,410
100.
80
00:05:26,910 --> 00:05:28,996
Ninety-nine.
81
00:05:33,542 --> 00:05:35,127
Why do you only sleep with a top on?
82
00:05:36,879 --> 00:05:39,006
Because I get cold upstairs
and hot downstairs.
83
00:05:40,132 --> 00:05:41,133
I get that.
84
00:05:44,469 --> 00:05:45,721
Mornin'.
85
00:06:08,368 --> 00:06:10,120
Listen to what Rupert said in this one.
86
00:06:10,120 --> 00:06:14,041
"I truly look forward
to seeing my old club again.
87
00:06:14,041 --> 00:06:16,335
Richmond are top-class."
88
00:06:16,919 --> 00:06:19,588
- What a soggy, wet piece of shit.
- Thank you.
89
00:06:20,881 --> 00:06:24,801
Right, I'm off to the training ground.
Thanks again for the opportunity.
90
00:06:25,385 --> 00:06:27,846
Babe, you earned it.
91
00:06:27,846 --> 00:06:31,058
{\an8}Shandy came up with
this super fun Bantr promo.
92
00:06:31,058 --> 00:06:33,185
{\an8}It uses all the single players
on the team.
93
00:06:33,185 --> 00:06:34,436
{\an8}Yeah.
94
00:06:34,436 --> 00:06:38,524
{\an8}The anonymous man you're Bantr-ing with
could be a professional footballer.
95
00:06:39,983 --> 00:06:41,818
{\an8}That's great.
96
00:06:41,818 --> 00:06:44,613
{\an8}And that's all the single players,
you say?
97
00:06:44,613 --> 00:06:48,700
{\an8}So, it's, like,
Colin and Dani and Sam, et cetera?
98
00:06:48,700 --> 00:06:50,953
{\an8}Yeah, although I don't think
Sam's doing it anymore.
99
00:06:51,912 --> 00:06:54,373
- No.
- So fun.
100
00:06:56,208 --> 00:06:58,168
- Ms. Jones.
- Hello, Barbara.
101
00:06:58,168 --> 00:07:00,128
- All right there, Barbs?
- It's "Barbara."
102
00:06:58,252 --> 00:07:00,128
- All right there, Barbs?
- It's "Barbara."
103
00:07:00,796 --> 00:07:04,925
{\an8}If possible, could I get two tickets
for the Richmond-West Ham match?
104
00:07:04,925 --> 00:07:07,052
{\an8}Jack might be coming to London
this weekend.
105
00:07:07,052 --> 00:07:08,303
Of course.
106
00:07:09,763 --> 00:07:10,764
Who's Jack?
107
00:07:12,683 --> 00:07:13,600
Jack Danvers.
108
00:07:14,977 --> 00:07:18,105
{\an8}The head of the VC
that funded your company.
109
00:07:19,231 --> 00:07:20,691
{\an8}Our boss.
110
00:07:23,318 --> 00:07:27,030
{\an8}Yes. That Jack. Of course.
111
00:07:28,240 --> 00:07:29,908
{\an8}That's not a problem, Barbara.
112
00:07:30,659 --> 00:07:32,703
{\an8}I can let you have some seats in my suite.
113
00:07:34,496 --> 00:07:35,497
{\an8}Lovely.
114
00:07:35,497 --> 00:07:38,750
{\an8}Thank you so much, Rebecca.
That's so kind of you and so efficient.
115
00:07:41,420 --> 00:07:42,254
{\an8}Keeley.
116
00:07:44,840 --> 00:07:46,300
{\an8}Thanks, Barbara.
117
00:07:48,760 --> 00:07:52,931
{\an8}So, the one thing we cannot do
against West Ham is the False Nine.
118
00:07:52,931 --> 00:07:54,892
{\an8}- 'Cause that's Nate's shit.
- Exactly.
119
00:07:54,892 --> 00:07:57,269
{\an8}So, we decided to go with
our classic 4-4-2.
120
00:07:57,269 --> 00:07:59,521
{\an8}Which is exactly what
that prick expects us to do.
121
00:07:59,521 --> 00:08:02,399
{\an8}So, we do the opposite.
Five up front. Full-on attack.
122
00:07:59,605 --> 00:08:02,399
{\an8}So, we do the opposite.
Five up front. Full-on attack.
123
00:08:02,399 --> 00:08:05,944
{\an8}But Nate knows we're gonna do that,
124
00:08:05,944 --> 00:08:09,990
{\an8}because Nate knows that we're trying to
outthink him by thinking like him.
125
00:08:10,824 --> 00:08:14,786
{\an8}Well, fuck Nate, fuck thinking
and fuck fucking Socrates.
126
00:08:14,786 --> 00:08:17,122
{\an8}So, we gotta stop thinking like Nate
and start thinking
127
00:08:17,122 --> 00:08:19,917
{\an8}like Nate would think we would think
if Nate were thinking like us,
128
00:08:19,917 --> 00:08:22,085
{\an8}and then do the last thing
that Nate thinking like us
129
00:08:22,085 --> 00:08:25,172
{\an8}thinking like Nate thinking like us
would ever expect us to do.
130
00:08:26,089 --> 00:08:30,677
{\an8}Have Zava drop back
and play Nate's False Nine.
131
00:08:30,677 --> 00:08:31,970
{\an8}Voi-fucking-là.
132
00:08:33,096 --> 00:08:34,222
{\an8}Brilliant.
133
00:08:34,222 --> 00:08:36,475
{\an8}- It's mostly Beard's idea.
- Nah, it was a group effort.
134
00:08:36,475 --> 00:08:37,601
{\an8}I do have one question.
135
00:08:37,601 --> 00:08:38,977
{\an8}- Of course.
- Who fucking cares?
136
00:08:40,270 --> 00:08:41,813
{\an8}Do you think Zava'll do it?
137
00:08:48,737 --> 00:08:49,863
Fuck!
138
00:08:51,573 --> 00:08:53,158
- Good mornin'.
- Hey.
139
00:08:55,118 --> 00:08:57,871
- Uh-oh, what's wrong?
- Roy doesn't think we can beat Nate.
140
00:08:57,871 --> 00:09:01,667
- Higgins doesn't think so either!
- Beard said it to me first.
141
00:08:57,955 --> 00:09:01,667
- Higgins doesn't think so either!
- Beard said it to me first.
142
00:09:01,667 --> 00:09:04,795
- You throw me under the bus? How dare--
- You walked in here this morning--
143
00:09:04,795 --> 00:09:08,257
{\an8}- You're gonna sell me out?
- Whoa! Whoa.
144
00:09:08,257 --> 00:09:11,093
{\an8}Y'all pointin' more fingers
than Ganesha givin' directions.
145
00:09:11,093 --> 00:09:14,596
{\an8}Now look, you fellas need to calm down
and just kiss.
146
00:09:17,224 --> 00:09:18,225
{\an8}He's right.
147
00:09:20,352 --> 00:09:21,687
{\an8}Keep it simple, smartypants.
148
00:09:22,479 --> 00:09:24,439
{\an8}An answer will show up. Don't worry.
149
00:09:25,107 --> 00:09:29,403
{\an8}But until it does,
here's a question for y'all: Am I a mess?
150
00:09:32,322 --> 00:09:34,908
{\an8}Sassy ended up
spending the night last night and--
151
00:09:35,492 --> 00:09:38,287
{\an8}No, hush your butts.
That ain't the headline.
152
00:09:38,287 --> 00:09:40,455
{\an8}Well, I asked her out
on a proper date this morning.
153
00:09:40,455 --> 00:09:44,668
{\an8}She turned me down cold. She said I was--
and I quote-- "a mess."
154
00:09:46,587 --> 00:09:51,383
{\an8}- Yeah.
- Sounds like a case for the Diamond Dogs!
155
00:09:51,383 --> 00:09:52,843
Release the hounds.
156
00:09:52,843 --> 00:09:55,053
Yeah, here we go! Let's do it.
157
00:09:59,057 --> 00:10:00,893
Fuck's sakes.
158
00:09:59,057 --> 00:10:00,893
Fuck's sakes.
159
00:10:05,898 --> 00:10:06,732
Yes.
160
00:10:07,816 --> 00:10:09,651
-"Yes" what?
- Yes, you're a mess.
161
00:10:09,651 --> 00:10:11,486
Okay. Expound.
162
00:10:11,486 --> 00:10:12,696
{\an8}We're playing Nate this week,
163
00:10:12,696 --> 00:10:14,323
{\an8}and you're acting like
it's not a big deal.
164
00:10:15,199 --> 00:10:16,867
{\an8}Nothing's different. He didn't hurt you.
165
00:10:16,867 --> 00:10:18,827
{\an8}Hey, look,
we ain't talking about Nate right now.
166
00:10:18,827 --> 00:10:21,914
{\an8}I'm asking you if you think I'm a mess.
All right?
167
00:10:21,914 --> 00:10:23,081
{\an8}Higgy pie, what do you think?
168
00:10:23,081 --> 00:10:26,919
{\an8}I think I don't understand
how you're not pissed off with Nate.
169
00:10:28,295 --> 00:10:30,714
We have a saying
in Co-Dependents Anonymous.
170
00:10:30,714 --> 00:10:33,509
- Y-- What?
- Jane makes me go with her.
171
00:10:34,092 --> 00:10:35,344
Yeah.
172
00:10:35,344 --> 00:10:36,887
{\an8}Pain is like carbon monoxide.
173
00:10:37,429 --> 00:10:40,891
{\an8}Expressing it to the person
who hurt you is like opening a vent,
174
00:10:40,891 --> 00:10:43,185
{\an8}but holding it in will poison you.
175
00:10:44,144 --> 00:10:46,772
{\an8}I like that.
But Nate didn't hurt me.
176
00:10:46,772 --> 00:10:47,940
Bullshit!
177
00:10:49,775 --> 00:10:52,069
Roy, did you wanna get in
on this Diamond Dog situation?
178
00:10:52,069 --> 00:10:54,738
- Hey, Roy! Hey, Roy.
- Hey, Roy. Here, Roy.
179
00:10:54,738 --> 00:10:56,907
Here, Roy. Come here, Roy.
180
00:10:56,907 --> 00:10:58,951
La, la, la, la, la!
181
00:10:58,951 --> 00:11:02,996
{\an8}So, the match of the week
is clearly Richmond and West Ham.
182
00:10:59,034 --> 00:11:02,996
{\an8}So, the match of the week
is clearly Richmond and West Ham.
183
00:11:02,996 --> 00:11:05,791
Now, it's been a strong start
to the season for both of these teams,
184
00:11:05,791 --> 00:11:09,002
but I think the Hammers are favorites,
going into the London derby,
185
00:11:09,002 --> 00:11:13,090
based on the tactical acumen
of the Wonder Kid, Nathan Shelley.
186
00:11:14,633 --> 00:11:17,261
Yeah, Shelley is brilliant,
there's no doubt about that,
187
00:11:17,261 --> 00:11:20,889
but Zava, he is a genius.
I like the Greyhounds for this one.
188
00:11:20,889 --> 00:11:22,266
That's my guy!
189
00:11:22,266 --> 00:11:24,226
No, you can't have him. He's mine.
190
00:11:26,645 --> 00:11:29,064
- Let's move on, shall we, to Sunday's--
- Hey, look. Guys, guys.
191
00:11:29,064 --> 00:11:30,232
Who cares, right?
192
00:11:31,525 --> 00:11:33,318
Now come on, we've got work to do.
Let's go.
193
00:11:34,152 --> 00:11:35,320
He is correct.
194
00:11:37,990 --> 00:11:42,619
We must ignore these talking faces.
Even when they are in our favor.
195
00:11:43,161 --> 00:11:44,663
Thank you, "Zorro."
196
00:11:45,247 --> 00:11:48,250
Exactly,
but it's actually pronounced "Zoreaux."
197
00:11:51,795 --> 00:11:52,796
Why?
198
00:11:54,923 --> 00:11:57,467
I don't know. Because that's how
my parents say it, I guess?
199
00:11:59,136 --> 00:12:04,057
My friend, you can be
whoever you want to be.
200
00:11:59,136 --> 00:12:04,057
My friend, you can be
whoever you want to be.
201
00:12:05,475 --> 00:12:09,688
I let all of my children name themselves
once they reach the age of seven.
202
00:12:11,481 --> 00:12:13,984
That is why my eldest is called
"Smingus Dingus."
203
00:12:16,069 --> 00:12:19,323
Dream big, and you may never wake up.
204
00:12:23,410 --> 00:12:24,995
Thank you.
205
00:12:24,995 --> 00:12:26,413
Jesus.
206
00:12:26,413 --> 00:12:30,626
I can't believe I'm about to say this,
but hey, lads, I agree with Zava.
207
00:12:30,626 --> 00:12:33,754
Yes, it's a big fucking game,
but we've just gotta focus, do what we do,
208
00:12:33,754 --> 00:12:35,464
- do you know what I mean?
- Yeah. He's right.
209
00:12:35,464 --> 00:12:36,673
And don't forget, yeah?
210
00:12:40,761 --> 00:12:43,972
- Believe in "Believe."
- Yes.
211
00:12:45,015 --> 00:12:45,933
What the--
212
00:12:46,517 --> 00:12:47,768
What?
213
00:12:48,477 --> 00:12:49,895
- Oh, shit.
- What?
214
00:12:55,317 --> 00:12:57,611
- Why the fuck did you do that?
- I was just checking
215
00:12:57,611 --> 00:12:59,571
if I acquired the ability
to chop things in half.
216
00:13:00,072 --> 00:13:01,073
Yeah, and what if you had?
217
00:13:02,950 --> 00:13:04,743
Sorry, bruv. I didn't think it through.
218
00:13:06,787 --> 00:13:09,873
Fellas. Someone ripped this in half.
219
00:13:09,873 --> 00:13:11,416
What the fuck? What?
220
00:13:12,292 --> 00:13:13,293
What the fuck?
221
00:13:14,086 --> 00:13:15,254
You're joking
222
00:13:18,382 --> 00:13:19,383
What the fuck?
223
00:13:42,948 --> 00:13:43,949
Hello...
224
00:13:44,741 --> 00:13:45,993
Jade.
225
00:13:48,537 --> 00:13:49,538
Nathan.
226
00:13:51,540 --> 00:13:52,541
Shelley.
227
00:13:54,543 --> 00:13:56,003
Lovely to see you again.
228
00:13:56,003 --> 00:13:57,296
Okay.
229
00:13:58,881 --> 00:14:00,299
Sorry I've not been around much.
230
00:13:58,881 --> 00:14:00,299
Sorry I've not been around much.
231
00:14:01,550 --> 00:14:02,676
You haven't?
232
00:14:02,676 --> 00:14:06,722
No. No, I've been really busy
with my new job.
233
00:14:06,722 --> 00:14:11,476
Big new job just keeping me very busy.
234
00:14:12,060 --> 00:14:15,105
Sounds silly. Maybe you should quit
your big new busy job.
235
00:14:17,482 --> 00:14:19,693
Anyway, just here to pick up my takeaway.
236
00:14:19,693 --> 00:14:21,945
I bought lunch for my whole staff.
237
00:14:21,945 --> 00:14:24,072
Apart from the trainers,
'cause they eat like cows.
238
00:14:25,449 --> 00:14:28,160
Sorry, that sounds-- No, they're love--
I mean, they're lovely people.
239
00:14:28,160 --> 00:14:29,494
They're just vegetarians.
240
00:14:34,208 --> 00:14:35,751
No way.
241
00:14:36,502 --> 00:14:40,964
Look who's here. No fucking way!
242
00:14:41,548 --> 00:14:43,842
- Do you know who this is?
- Jason Jelly.
243
00:14:43,842 --> 00:14:45,886
- That's right.
- No, "Nathan Shelley."
244
00:14:45,886 --> 00:14:47,888
That's right, Nathan Shelley,
245
00:14:47,888 --> 00:14:50,891
manager of West Ham United,
in my restaurant!
246
00:14:52,309 --> 00:14:53,769
- Big week, my guy.
- Yep.
247
00:14:53,769 --> 00:14:57,814
Big fucking week.
I'm Derek. I'm the manager here.
248
00:14:58,440 --> 00:15:00,359
Anything you need, you got it.
249
00:14:58,440 --> 00:15:00,359
Anything you need, you got it.
250
00:15:01,026 --> 00:15:03,570
- Okay.
- From one manager to another.
251
00:15:04,071 --> 00:15:05,864
Yeah, well, it's not quite the same, but--
252
00:15:06,907 --> 00:15:08,492
Facing your team this week.
253
00:15:09,034 --> 00:15:10,410
That's gotta be hard-core, right?
254
00:15:11,370 --> 00:15:13,830
I mean, you talked a lot of shit
about them in the press.
255
00:15:13,830 --> 00:15:17,793
- Didn't ya? I loved it.
- Sorry, can I pay?
256
00:15:18,377 --> 00:15:24,591
No.
This is on me, okay? On me. Understand?
257
00:15:24,591 --> 00:15:27,094
This man's money is no good here.
258
00:15:27,719 --> 00:15:31,181
Never charge. Except for booze.
Gotta charge for booze.
259
00:15:31,181 --> 00:15:32,891
I didn't order any booze. It's 12:30.
260
00:15:35,269 --> 00:15:37,563
Knock 'em dead. Go Hammers!
261
00:15:40,858 --> 00:15:43,944
No way. Oi, do you know who this is?
262
00:15:49,616 --> 00:15:50,784
All right, okay. Bye.
263
00:16:05,549 --> 00:16:06,592
And cut!
264
00:16:06,592 --> 00:16:08,552
Lovely, Colin. Thank you.
265
00:16:08,552 --> 00:16:11,346
All right. Okay, Dani, you're up.
266
00:16:12,973 --> 00:16:13,849
I'm very nervous.
267
00:16:13,849 --> 00:16:16,852
No. Don't be nervous. Look, just sit here.
Look into the camera
268
00:16:16,852 --> 00:16:18,854
and pretend you're talking
to an old friend.
269
00:16:18,854 --> 00:16:20,189
My oldest friend is Javiar.
270
00:16:20,189 --> 00:16:22,691
Great. How long have you known Javiar?
271
00:16:22,691 --> 00:16:26,278
Only a couple of months,
but he turns 108 years old next week.
272
00:16:27,738 --> 00:16:29,615
- Perfect.
- Yeah.
273
00:16:30,699 --> 00:16:31,825
Final checks.
274
00:16:33,702 --> 00:16:34,703
Thank you.
275
00:16:36,914 --> 00:16:38,123
- Hello, Keeley.
- Hi.
276
00:16:38,123 --> 00:16:41,919
Yeah.
Just scoot to your left a little bit.
277
00:16:41,919 --> 00:16:45,172
Yeah, that's it. Okay, off you go, Dani.
278
00:16:45,756 --> 00:16:49,760
{\an8}You may not know who I am, but I think
the most beautiful parts of a woman
279
00:16:50,511 --> 00:16:51,803
{\an8}are her flaws.
280
00:16:52,471 --> 00:16:55,807
And cut! Thank you, Dani. Next!
281
00:16:55,807 --> 00:16:56,892
Okay.
282
00:17:00,854 --> 00:17:02,689
- Brought you coffee.
- Yeah.
283
00:17:02,689 --> 00:17:04,900
- How's it going?
- Oh, my God. This is great.
284
00:17:04,900 --> 00:17:06,234
- Yeah?
- They're great.
285
00:17:06,234 --> 00:17:08,529
I just-- I love being the boss.
286
00:17:08,529 --> 00:17:10,614
- Cheers to that. Yeah.
- Cheers to that.
287
00:17:10,614 --> 00:17:11,990
You ready, Zoreaux?
288
00:17:12,532 --> 00:17:14,660
Yeah,
but I actually go by "Van Damme" now.
289
00:17:15,285 --> 00:17:17,704
{\an8}Okay, great. Action, Van Damme.
290
00:17:19,205 --> 00:17:20,665
{\an8}You don't know who I am,
291
00:17:20,665 --> 00:17:23,377
{\an8}but I'm looking for someone
who likes short walks on the beach,
292
00:17:23,377 --> 00:17:26,964
{\an8}so we can spend more time, you know...
293
00:17:32,177 --> 00:17:33,720
And cut.
294
00:17:33,720 --> 00:17:36,515
Great, thanks, Van Damme. Next!
295
00:17:38,058 --> 00:17:40,018
- Van Damme?
- Yeah. It's my new name.
296
00:17:40,602 --> 00:17:42,229
Cool. Why?
297
00:17:42,813 --> 00:17:44,106
Because I love Jean-Claude Van Damme,
298
00:17:44,106 --> 00:17:46,149
and Zava told me
I should be whoever I wanna be.
299
00:17:47,401 --> 00:17:49,611
- Okay, yeah. Cool.
- All right, Van Damme.
300
00:17:49,611 --> 00:17:51,321
- All right, boys.
- Take it easy.
301
00:17:52,656 --> 00:17:54,074
He's so fucking hot.
302
00:17:55,200 --> 00:17:58,954
- What's his story?
- Jamie? He's so cocky.
303
00:18:00,414 --> 00:18:02,374
But I guess you have to be at this level.
304
00:18:03,333 --> 00:18:04,751
But he only thinks about himself.
305
00:18:07,129 --> 00:18:08,505
At least, he used to.
306
00:18:08,505 --> 00:18:11,049
Joking. No.
307
00:18:11,049 --> 00:18:14,469
But he's not accountable for his actions
and what they do to others.
308
00:18:15,637 --> 00:18:19,391
Except he is getting better
at making apologies.
309
00:18:21,435 --> 00:18:23,687
Still, he only thinks with his dick.
310
00:18:25,189 --> 00:18:29,109
And yet, I don't think
he's seen anyone in ages.
311
00:18:31,528 --> 00:18:33,780
I just wanna know if I can bang him, babe.
312
00:18:37,826 --> 00:18:39,036
I don't know.
313
00:18:39,620 --> 00:18:41,580
You should probably ask him,
it's his dick.
314
00:18:41,580 --> 00:18:43,916
Cool. Off you go, Jamie.
315
00:18:52,508 --> 00:18:53,842
What are y'all still doing here?
316
00:18:53,842 --> 00:18:55,844
Coach, you're gonna wanna watch this.
317
00:18:55,844 --> 00:18:57,137
Is it one of them videos
318
00:18:57,137 --> 00:18:59,306
of a military parent
coming home after a long tour?
319
00:18:59,306 --> 00:19:01,600
'Cause if so, I'm gonna be eating tears
and snot for dinner.
320
00:18:59,389 --> 00:19:01,600
'Cause if so, I'm gonna be eating tears
and snot for dinner.
321
00:19:01,600 --> 00:19:02,684
Not quite.
322
00:19:45,894 --> 00:19:46,895
Here we go.
323
00:19:55,153 --> 00:19:56,738
Where'd this come from?
324
00:19:56,738 --> 00:19:59,366
This fucking legend
thought to pull the security footage
325
00:19:59,366 --> 00:20:00,868
when we told him about the sign.
326
00:19:59,449 --> 00:20:00,868
when we told him about the sign.
327
00:20:00,868 --> 00:20:02,661
I guess you can take the boy
out of journalism
328
00:20:02,661 --> 00:20:04,329
but you can't take journalism
out of the boy.
329
00:20:04,329 --> 00:20:06,373
Right, you fucking ruined it now.
The point is,
330
00:20:06,373 --> 00:20:08,876
the answer we were looking for
has arrived.
331
00:20:09,459 --> 00:20:10,627
What are you talking about?
332
00:20:10,627 --> 00:20:14,047
A video like this could motivate a team, perhaps.
333
00:20:17,718 --> 00:20:19,011
Thank you for your help, Trent.
334
00:20:19,511 --> 00:20:21,805
May a young Robert Redford
portray you in a film someday.
335
00:20:22,389 --> 00:20:23,599
Probably Dustin Hoffman.
336
00:20:23,599 --> 00:20:24,850
- Good night.
- Good night.
337
00:20:26,393 --> 00:20:28,270
Go home, guys. Get some sleep.
338
00:20:29,605 --> 00:20:30,814
Okay.
339
00:20:30,814 --> 00:20:32,566
- Good night, Ted. Night, Beard.
- Good night.
340
00:20:32,566 --> 00:20:33,650
Night, Coach.
341
00:20:40,949 --> 00:20:42,117
Coach.
342
00:20:42,951 --> 00:20:46,038
I was thinking about your Sassy situation.
343
00:20:46,622 --> 00:20:47,581
Yeah.
344
00:20:47,581 --> 00:20:49,124
Jane's sister is in town.
345
00:20:49,124 --> 00:20:51,210
- No, thank you, Coach.
- That's the right answer.
346
00:21:10,896 --> 00:21:13,106
Burning the midnight oil, I see.
347
00:21:14,858 --> 00:21:16,944
Yeah. Sorry for the smell.
348
00:21:18,779 --> 00:21:20,489
The oil burning.
349
00:21:22,616 --> 00:21:25,452
So, you're feeling confident
about this weekend?
350
00:21:26,119 --> 00:21:27,788
Yeah, no, I think so.
351
00:21:30,832 --> 00:21:33,210
Yeah, no. Go-- Yeah.
We're gonna destroy, right?
352
00:21:34,002 --> 00:21:35,212
Good.
353
00:21:35,212 --> 00:21:37,422
No, it's just, I--
354
00:21:39,675 --> 00:21:41,885
I just haven't seen Ted since I left and...
355
00:21:43,887 --> 00:21:46,014
We didn't leave on the best of terms and...
356
00:21:47,766 --> 00:21:50,018
I feel like I owe him
an apology or something.
357
00:21:50,018 --> 00:21:52,312
You did what was best for you.
358
00:21:52,896 --> 00:21:54,314
What were you meant to do?
359
00:21:54,314 --> 00:21:57,025
Hang around,
supporting Ted for the rest of your life?
360
00:21:57,025 --> 00:21:58,610
I don't think so.
361
00:22:05,117 --> 00:22:07,911
You've done nothing wrong, Nathan,
I promise you.
362
00:22:09,872 --> 00:22:11,540
You earned this job.
363
00:22:14,585 --> 00:22:16,545
Well, so what do I say when I see him?
364
00:22:17,462 --> 00:22:19,756
You say nothing, apart from "hello."
365
00:22:21,091 --> 00:22:23,510
You look him in the eye.
You shake his hand.
366
00:22:25,053 --> 00:22:26,763
And then you beat him.
367
00:22:29,183 --> 00:22:30,851
And then we go and celebrate.
368
00:22:32,186 --> 00:22:33,187
Okay.
369
00:22:33,854 --> 00:22:34,730
Good night, Nathan.
370
00:22:37,900 --> 00:22:40,986
Good night, Rupert. Thank you.
371
00:22:42,446 --> 00:22:43,572
Mr. Mannion.
372
00:23:33,705 --> 00:23:34,706
Hey.
373
00:23:35,374 --> 00:23:37,042
Working late? Or hardly working?
374
00:23:37,042 --> 00:23:39,294
Well, I don't think
that's how the joke goes.
375
00:23:39,294 --> 00:23:40,504
What joke?
376
00:23:41,588 --> 00:23:42,798
Never mind. What's up?
377
00:23:46,051 --> 00:23:47,636
I really want to win this one.
378
00:23:48,929 --> 00:23:50,013
I know.
379
00:23:57,354 --> 00:23:58,522
Everything okay?
380
00:24:04,987 --> 00:24:06,238
Am I a mess?
381
00:24:06,238 --> 00:24:07,823
Of course you are.
That's why we get along.
382
00:24:11,326 --> 00:24:16,373
And I wish I could tell you
to ignore Sass, but she's usually right.
383
00:24:18,041 --> 00:24:20,919
So, Sassy already told you
about the-- Of course. Girl talk.
384
00:24:21,587 --> 00:24:22,588
Girl talk.
385
00:24:25,757 --> 00:24:28,218
So, is everything all right?
386
00:24:30,012 --> 00:24:31,013
Yeah, I'm good.
387
00:24:31,013 --> 00:24:32,139
Oklahoma?
388
00:24:40,314 --> 00:24:41,982
I'm a work in "progmess."
389
00:24:48,071 --> 00:24:49,072
Good night, Ted.
390
00:24:53,118 --> 00:24:54,328
You already won, you know?
391
00:24:56,914 --> 00:24:58,457
You got that turkey out of your life.
392
00:25:02,878 --> 00:25:03,879
Beat them.
393
00:25:07,216 --> 00:25:08,300
Good night, boss.
394
00:25:54,930 --> 00:25:56,890
Oi, do I look all right?
395
00:25:56,890 --> 00:25:58,600
Of course you do. Why?
396
00:25:58,600 --> 00:26:00,018
Well, if Jack actually shows up,
397
00:25:58,684 --> 00:26:00,018
Well, if Jack actually shows up,
398
00:26:00,018 --> 00:26:03,272
I want him to think that I look
mysterious and powerful.
399
00:26:03,272 --> 00:26:04,690
Dynamic, you know?
400
00:26:04,690 --> 00:26:09,570
- All of that.
- You are mysterious, powerful and dynamic.
401
00:26:12,990 --> 00:26:14,157
Shit, I'm nervous.
402
00:26:15,826 --> 00:26:17,828
I think I need to go
and reapply my lip liner.
403
00:26:19,955 --> 00:26:21,790
- I'll see you upstairs in the suite.
- Yep.
404
00:26:25,377 --> 00:26:27,045
Hey, Rebecca!
405
00:26:27,045 --> 00:26:29,590
- Rupert.
- Wonderful to see you.
406
00:26:30,382 --> 00:26:33,218
- Bex. Love the new hair.
- Hi.
407
00:26:33,802 --> 00:26:35,012
I haven't changed my hair.
408
00:26:35,012 --> 00:26:37,139
Nor should you. It's perfection.
409
00:26:38,640 --> 00:26:40,142
So, how's the little one?
410
00:26:40,142 --> 00:26:44,271
Oh, yeah, Diane. She's already walking.
Can you believe that?
411
00:26:44,271 --> 00:26:47,191
Yeah.
Drooling and pooing around the house.
412
00:26:47,691 --> 00:26:48,901
Takes after her father.
413
00:26:51,195 --> 00:26:54,114
Well. Hey, take it easy on us today.
414
00:26:54,990 --> 00:26:56,366
No promises.
415
00:27:08,879 --> 00:27:10,005
Oh, shit.
416
00:27:21,391 --> 00:27:22,476
Excuse me.
417
00:27:22,476 --> 00:27:24,978
I've got a bit of a situation here.
418
00:27:28,649 --> 00:27:31,818
Thank you. But it's actually not that.
419
00:27:35,155 --> 00:27:36,532
You're a lifesaver!
420
00:27:37,950 --> 00:27:39,284
Usually I'm like clockwork,
421
00:27:39,284 --> 00:27:42,037
but because I've been so stressed,
I've come on early.
422
00:27:43,455 --> 00:27:46,375
I'm so happy that it's a super
and not a skinny.
423
00:27:46,375 --> 00:27:48,126
Who are those even for?
424
00:27:48,126 --> 00:27:51,672
It's not like my vagina is on a diet,
I'm on my fucking period.
425
00:27:53,340 --> 00:27:54,883
Oi, thanks for helping me.
426
00:27:54,883 --> 00:27:56,385
And I love your shoes!
427
00:27:56,385 --> 00:28:00,681
- Yeah. Thanks. Pay it forward.
- Yeah.
428
00:27:56,468 --> 00:28:00,681
- Yeah. Thanks. Pay it forward.
- Yeah.
429
00:28:07,771 --> 00:28:09,398
Sorry. Excuse me.
430
00:28:11,775 --> 00:28:12,776
Hi.
431
00:28:14,778 --> 00:28:15,779
Boy, you're tall.
432
00:28:16,613 --> 00:28:18,282
Is your dad a tree or something?
433
00:28:19,116 --> 00:28:20,284
No, I'm screwing around.
434
00:28:21,618 --> 00:28:23,787
Hey, speaking of trees,
who are y'all rooting for today?
435
00:28:23,787 --> 00:28:24,913
West Ham.
436
00:28:25,414 --> 00:28:27,249
Yeah, no, that makes sense. Yeah.
437
00:28:33,338 --> 00:28:36,300
Go ahead. Yeah. Going down one more floor.
438
00:28:36,300 --> 00:28:38,552
- Thank you.
- Yeah, of course.
439
00:28:39,928 --> 00:28:41,096
Best of luck out there.
440
00:28:57,571 --> 00:28:59,156
Hey, Nate. That you?
441
00:29:01,366 --> 00:29:02,784
Hi. I didn't see you there.
442
00:29:02,784 --> 00:29:05,954
- That's okay. How you been, man?
- Yeah, okay.
443
00:29:06,455 --> 00:29:08,457
Yeah. Good.
444
00:29:14,296 --> 00:29:15,297
Listen, Ted.
445
00:29:16,298 --> 00:29:19,676
I just wanna say that the way I left--
446
00:29:19,676 --> 00:29:22,971
Nathan. There you are.
447
00:29:24,264 --> 00:29:25,265
Yeah.
448
00:29:31,939 --> 00:29:33,398
Hey, Rupert.
449
00:29:34,107 --> 00:29:36,485
- Ted.
- Nice to see you again.
450
00:29:38,403 --> 00:29:39,446
Good luck.
451
00:29:44,117 --> 00:29:46,828
- Keeley? Yeah.
- She's absolutely fantastic.
452
00:29:47,412 --> 00:29:48,372
Here she is now.
453
00:29:49,081 --> 00:29:52,584
- Hey. Yeah.
- Keeley? This is Jack Danvers.
454
00:29:52,584 --> 00:29:53,794
Hello.
455
00:29:55,003 --> 00:29:57,130
I believe you have something of mine.
456
00:29:59,383 --> 00:30:01,677
Oh, fuck. You're Jack?
457
00:29:59,383 --> 00:30:01,677
Oh, fuck. You're Jack?
458
00:30:03,554 --> 00:30:05,055
This is a bit embarrassing.
459
00:30:05,055 --> 00:30:07,891
- No.
- Yeah. We all thought you were a man.
460
00:30:07,891 --> 00:30:09,768
Yeah, that too.
461
00:30:10,394 --> 00:30:11,478
It's like that old riddle.
462
00:30:11,478 --> 00:30:13,939
- What riddle?
- You know, always a tricky one, this one.
463
00:30:13,939 --> 00:30:15,566
A father and son are in a car wreck.
464
00:30:15,566 --> 00:30:19,403
Dad dies instantly, the son is rushed
to an emergency room.
465
00:30:19,403 --> 00:30:21,446
A surgeon walks in and says,
466
00:30:21,446 --> 00:30:24,241
"I can't operate on this boy.
He's my son."
467
00:30:24,241 --> 00:30:25,784
How is it possible?
468
00:30:26,702 --> 00:30:28,120
- Because she's a woman.
- She's gay.
469
00:30:28,120 --> 00:30:30,163
- Sperm donor.
- He lives in a simulation?
470
00:30:30,831 --> 00:30:33,709
Right.
Yeah, I guess that's a bit dated now.
471
00:30:35,002 --> 00:30:37,588
So, I assume "Jack" is short
for "Jacqueline," right?
472
00:30:37,588 --> 00:30:39,506
No. It's short for my father wanted a boy.
473
00:30:41,633 --> 00:30:45,721
I'm gonna go and sit down now, outside. Now.
474
00:30:46,680 --> 00:30:48,015
Jack, welcome.
475
00:30:48,015 --> 00:30:50,601
We are not allowed to take drinks
to our seats.
476
00:30:50,601 --> 00:30:53,061
So if you want to get plastered,
we should probably do that now.
477
00:30:53,562 --> 00:30:54,563
Okay.
478
00:30:55,856 --> 00:30:57,566
Well, after you.
479
00:31:00,777 --> 00:31:02,654
You're so funny, Rebecca.
480
00:31:05,157 --> 00:31:07,242
Barbara's obsessed with Rebecca.
481
00:31:08,160 --> 00:31:11,330
I hope she doesn't try and kill her
and wear her skin as a suit.
482
00:31:15,918 --> 00:31:17,252
What the fuck?
483
00:31:17,252 --> 00:31:19,171
Cheers. It's gonna be a good day.
484
00:31:19,796 --> 00:31:21,757
- All right, Baz.
- Oi!
485
00:31:22,925 --> 00:31:25,093
This is a Richmond pub.
486
00:31:26,178 --> 00:31:27,804
It's all right, Mae. He's with me.
487
00:31:32,643 --> 00:31:34,228
Get the fuck out!
488
00:31:39,525 --> 00:31:40,859
Come on, Richmond!
489
00:31:40,859 --> 00:31:43,612
Come on, Richmond! Come on, Richmond!
490
00:31:43,612 --> 00:31:45,447
It's a full house for today's battle
491
00:31:45,447 --> 00:31:49,451
between West Ham United
and Zava's AFC Richmond.
492
00:31:49,451 --> 00:31:53,121
A win would take either team
to the top spot in the table,
493
00:31:53,121 --> 00:31:56,250
knocking mighty Manchester City
off number one.
494
00:31:56,792 --> 00:31:58,961
Should be a tight match, Chris.
Any predictions?
495
00:31:58,961 --> 00:32:00,838
I stopped making predictions, Arlo.
496
00:31:59,044 --> 00:32:00,838
I stopped making predictions, Arlo.
497
00:32:00,838 --> 00:32:02,256
Because I was never wrong.
498
00:32:02,256 --> 00:32:05,592
Got to the point I was worried
I was the one making things happen.
499
00:32:05,592 --> 00:32:07,010
Well, that's interesting.
500
00:32:07,010 --> 00:32:08,178
I knew you'd say that.
501
00:32:08,178 --> 00:32:10,681
They fade and die
502
00:32:10,681 --> 00:32:14,768
Fortune's always hiding
503
00:32:14,768 --> 00:32:18,522
I've looked everywhere
504
00:32:18,522 --> 00:32:22,442
I'm forever blowing bubbles
505
00:32:22,442 --> 00:32:26,405
Pretty bubbles in the air
506
00:32:26,405 --> 00:32:29,116
United! United!
507
00:32:29,116 --> 00:32:32,160
United! United!
508
00:32:32,160 --> 00:32:34,997
United! United!
509
00:32:36,373 --> 00:32:37,374
Nate.
510
00:32:39,293 --> 00:32:41,128
Let's have fun out there today, yeah?
511
00:33:06,695 --> 00:33:09,156
West Ham are quite happy
to just soak up the pressure.
512
00:33:09,156 --> 00:33:12,659
Not taking any risks at all
against Richmond,
513
00:33:12,659 --> 00:33:14,661
of all teams, at home.
514
00:33:15,412 --> 00:33:18,874
- A sign of how far Richmond have come.
- It's all right. We're okay.
515
00:33:18,874 --> 00:33:20,459
What a threat Zava is.
516
00:33:20,459 --> 00:33:23,837
Richmond! To the right!
Tight! Don't get scared.
517
00:33:28,175 --> 00:33:32,012
And it stays nil-nil,
thanks to an amazing save by Zoreaux.
518
00:33:32,012 --> 00:33:34,223
- Van Damme.
- Van Damme!
519
00:33:34,223 --> 00:33:36,183
I hear he wants
to be called "Van Damme" now.
520
00:33:36,183 --> 00:33:37,100
Why?
521
00:33:37,100 --> 00:33:39,686
Well, we'd probably have to dive
into his childhood for that answer.
522
00:33:40,938 --> 00:33:44,650
Richmond need the key pass
to unlock the Hammers' defense.
523
00:33:44,650 --> 00:33:45,734
That could be the one.
524
00:33:47,402 --> 00:33:48,946
- Tartt hits the woodwork.
- No!
525
00:33:48,946 --> 00:33:51,031
- That was close.
- Zava was wide open.
526
00:33:54,284 --> 00:33:55,953
For Zava!
527
00:33:56,828 --> 00:34:00,791
There'll be two more minutes
in the first half of this scoreless,
528
00:33:56,828 --> 00:34:00,791
There'll be two more minutes
in the first half of this scoreless,
529
00:34:00,791 --> 00:34:02,918
but pulsating, London derby.
530
00:34:04,586 --> 00:34:07,464
- Obisanya caught in possession.
- No.
531
00:34:07,464 --> 00:34:09,675
And here come West Ham on the break.
532
00:34:10,467 --> 00:34:12,386
Armando bearing down on goal.
533
00:34:14,471 --> 00:34:15,639
- Yeah!
- Yes!
534
00:34:15,639 --> 00:34:18,266
And it's there. Right under Van Damme.
535
00:34:18,266 --> 00:34:21,228
The Canadian keeper apparently
not as unstoppable
536
00:34:21,228 --> 00:34:23,105
as the Muscles from Brussels.
537
00:34:23,105 --> 00:34:25,983
That's not fair, Arlo. Nobody is.
538
00:34:25,983 --> 00:34:27,943
- We've been here before. Come on.
- Come on, lads.
539
00:34:27,943 --> 00:34:31,487
The Hammers go up 1-nil
just before halftime.
540
00:34:32,072 --> 00:34:34,032
Fuck it.
541
00:34:34,032 --> 00:34:37,077
All right, guys. Come on, now.
Let's end this half strong!
542
00:34:38,328 --> 00:34:39,204
Huddle.
543
00:34:42,623 --> 00:34:43,958
What's this shit?
544
00:34:45,043 --> 00:34:46,128
I don't know.
545
00:34:46,128 --> 00:34:48,880
- Lower. Move it right. Five.
- Brilliant.
546
00:34:48,880 --> 00:34:51,257
- Right now, come on. Five.
- Ref, just blow the fucking whistle.
547
00:34:55,429 --> 00:34:56,554
West Ham pressing now.
548
00:34:56,554 --> 00:34:58,515
- No.
- A new tactic from the Hammers
549
00:34:58,515 --> 00:35:00,642
in the closing seconds of the first half.
550
00:34:58,599 --> 00:35:00,642
in the closing seconds of the first half.
551
00:35:00,642 --> 00:35:02,561
It's never too late to change, Arlo.
552
00:35:04,938 --> 00:35:07,816
- No!
- Fuck! Fuck you! Fuck!
553
00:35:07,816 --> 00:35:11,028
And it's 2-nil. Oh, deary me.
554
00:35:15,616 --> 00:35:16,617
Excuse me.
555
00:35:20,829 --> 00:35:22,206
How did that happen?
556
00:35:24,124 --> 00:35:25,542
We go to halftime.
557
00:35:25,542 --> 00:35:27,586
Richmond have dominated possession,
558
00:35:27,586 --> 00:35:31,757
but out of absolutely nowhere,
it's 2-nil to the Hammers.
559
00:35:31,757 --> 00:35:33,634
We don't deserve that.
560
00:35:33,634 --> 00:35:35,135
What the fuck just happened?
561
00:35:35,636 --> 00:35:36,803
I don't know.
562
00:35:39,681 --> 00:35:41,475
Hey, fellas. I'll be right back. Okay?
563
00:35:41,475 --> 00:35:42,768
The fuck are you going?
564
00:35:42,768 --> 00:35:45,729
- I'll just be a minute or two, okay?
- What do we tell the team?
565
00:35:45,729 --> 00:35:47,064
I don't know. Surprise me.
566
00:35:53,195 --> 00:35:55,489
Hey, boss. What you doing down here?
567
00:35:55,489 --> 00:35:58,659
I just wanted to tell you
that I believe in you, Ted.
568
00:35:58,659 --> 00:35:59,826
Uh-huh?
569
00:35:59,826 --> 00:36:02,955
And I know that I've been
putting an awful lot of pressure on you
570
00:35:59,910 --> 00:36:02,955
And I know that I've been
putting an awful lot of pressure on you
571
00:36:02,955 --> 00:36:07,793
to win today, but I just want you
to forget all about that.
572
00:36:07,793 --> 00:36:11,588
Just be yourself and have fun.
573
00:36:13,048 --> 00:36:14,049
- Okay.
- Yeah.
574
00:36:14,049 --> 00:36:16,009
Okay. Well, thank you.
575
00:36:17,803 --> 00:36:19,555
I believe in you, Ted.
576
00:36:20,889 --> 00:36:21,890
And it's intense.
577
00:36:24,268 --> 00:36:26,395
- I better go. All right.
- Off you pop.
578
00:36:28,897 --> 00:36:32,317
Remember, have fun!
579
00:36:34,403 --> 00:36:37,906
Yes! This is so exciting!
580
00:36:43,370 --> 00:36:44,413
No.
581
00:36:52,838 --> 00:36:54,173
This is your surprise, huh?
582
00:36:54,715 --> 00:36:57,885
A minute ago, they were catatonic.
Now look at them.
583
00:36:59,761 --> 00:37:02,472
- They're killers.
- Frankly, Ted, sometimes that's good.
584
00:36:59,761 --> 00:37:02,472
- They're killers.
- Frankly, Ted, sometimes that's good.
585
00:37:18,989 --> 00:37:21,200
Oh, my. Richmond coming out of the tunnel
586
00:37:21,200 --> 00:37:23,452
with a palpable chip on their shoulder.
587
00:37:24,036 --> 00:37:28,207
Wow. A real tension on the pitch.
I think we're in for an exciting half.
588
00:37:28,207 --> 00:37:31,335
We begin the second half
with Richmond looking for a strong start.
589
00:37:31,335 --> 00:37:33,587
- Come on, boys. Fucking kill 'em.
- Fucking kill 'em.
590
00:37:33,587 --> 00:37:34,963
- Here we go!
- Kill!
591
00:37:38,258 --> 00:37:40,052
That's an awful tackle.
592
00:37:40,052 --> 00:37:41,845
- He would be fortunate to escape...
- Oh, fuck.
593
00:37:41,845 --> 00:37:43,180
...with just a yellow.
594
00:37:43,180 --> 00:37:45,098
It's a deserved red, and Richmond
595
00:37:45,098 --> 00:37:48,393
will play almost the entire second half
with ten men.
596
00:37:49,686 --> 00:37:51,730
He's actually a very sweet young man.
597
00:37:53,273 --> 00:37:54,942
Here come West Ham.
598
00:37:58,445 --> 00:38:00,197
And now Van Damme has been sent off.
599
00:37:58,445 --> 00:38:00,197
And now Van Damme has been sent off.
600
00:38:00,197 --> 00:38:02,783
- We're playing like Italians.
- I know.
601
00:38:03,534 --> 00:38:04,451
It's awesome.
602
00:38:07,329 --> 00:38:08,914
Oh, dear.
603
00:38:20,592 --> 00:38:22,845
It's getting a touch spicy out there.
604
00:38:22,845 --> 00:38:26,139
Spicy, Arlo? This is vintage vindaloo.
605
00:38:28,559 --> 00:38:29,434
No.
606
00:38:41,780 --> 00:38:45,784
Montlaur has lost his mind,
and Richmond have lost a third player.
607
00:38:55,294 --> 00:38:57,004
Fucking come on.
608
00:38:57,588 --> 00:39:00,591
Richmond have completely lost the plot.
609
00:38:57,588 --> 00:39:00,591
Richmond have completely lost the plot.
610
00:39:01,508 --> 00:39:05,137
Zava must be wondering
what he's done to deserve this.
611
00:39:10,601 --> 00:39:11,602
Yes!
612
00:39:12,144 --> 00:39:14,104
And it's 4-1 to the Hammers.
613
00:39:14,104 --> 00:39:17,024
It went from evenly matched
to unevenly matched
614
00:39:17,024 --> 00:39:21,069
to light a match on fire
and put it into a can of petrol.
615
00:39:21,069 --> 00:39:23,488
That second half should've come
with a trigger warning.
616
00:39:23,488 --> 00:39:27,826
One extraordinary goal by Zava
did not make it any less tough to watch.
617
00:39:27,826 --> 00:39:31,496
Richmond showed a side of themselves
we've never seen before.
618
00:39:31,496 --> 00:39:34,082
They played angry, dirty and ugly.
619
00:39:34,082 --> 00:39:37,127
Which are also the names
of Zava's three youngest kids.
620
00:39:37,753 --> 00:39:39,213
Shit.
621
00:39:41,798 --> 00:39:42,799
Shit.
622
00:39:44,092 --> 00:39:45,135
Shit.
623
00:39:45,135 --> 00:39:47,262
- Hey, it's okay.
- Shit.
624
00:39:52,059 --> 00:39:53,310
Did you guys have fun?
625
00:39:53,310 --> 00:39:54,394
Yeah.
626
00:39:54,394 --> 00:39:57,439
The violence was quite entertaining,
wasn't it? In a way.
627
00:40:05,197 --> 00:40:07,324
Sending off Van Damme was a mistake.
628
00:40:08,033 --> 00:40:09,326
He played with passion.
629
00:40:10,536 --> 00:40:13,080
"Passion" is a word we use
when we talk about love.
630
00:40:14,706 --> 00:40:17,960
It is also a word we use
to describe a crime.
631
00:40:19,670 --> 00:40:21,213
Sometimes it is also a fruit.
632
00:40:25,759 --> 00:40:27,094
Oh, gosh. I'm so sorry.
633
00:40:48,782 --> 00:40:51,368
- We fucked up.
- We overcorrected and played with hate.
634
00:40:54,162 --> 00:40:56,957
- Be great if you yelled at us a bit.
- Please.
635
00:40:58,750 --> 00:41:01,170
- Call us pieces of shit or something.
- Now.
636
00:40:58,750 --> 00:41:01,170
- Call us pieces of shit or something.
- Now.
637
00:41:02,671 --> 00:41:03,881
You can hit us.
638
00:41:03,881 --> 00:41:05,132
Get it over with.
639
00:41:06,967 --> 00:41:09,011
Tried something new. It didn't work.
Big whoop.
640
00:41:11,388 --> 00:41:13,432
I will take that thumb drive
one of y'all's got.
641
00:41:22,441 --> 00:41:25,319
Shake it off, fellas.
Lot of football left this season.
642
00:41:29,323 --> 00:41:31,491
- What a fucking arsehole.
- I know.
643
00:41:31,491 --> 00:41:34,453
You have to feel pretty good
about yourself after that win, yeah?
644
00:41:34,453 --> 00:41:36,788
Well, yeah. Richmond were clearly rattled.
645
00:41:37,873 --> 00:41:39,833
It was easier than I expected,
if I'm honest.
646
00:41:40,375 --> 00:41:41,376
What about Ted?
647
00:41:41,376 --> 00:41:44,254
Quite a snub not to shake his hand
at the end of the game.
648
00:41:45,464 --> 00:41:48,842
Did I not? I didn't mean to.
649
00:41:48,842 --> 00:41:53,096
I-- Guess I just got caught up
in the excitement of it all. Yeah.
650
00:41:55,140 --> 00:41:56,183
Excuse me a minute. I just...
651
00:42:08,570 --> 00:42:11,323
Coach Shelley,
Mr. Mannion asked me to give you this.
652
00:42:13,158 --> 00:42:14,701
{\an8}He'll meet you there in an hour.
653
00:42:17,829 --> 00:42:18,664
Thank--
654
00:42:36,390 --> 00:42:39,017
- It's so good to see you, Rebecca.
- You too, Bex.
655
00:42:39,017 --> 00:42:40,978
Oh, Rebecca, my dear.
656
00:42:40,978 --> 00:42:44,731
- So sorry for your loss.
- Thank you.
657
00:42:44,731 --> 00:42:47,150
Come on, old man.
It's way past your bedtime.
658
00:42:51,363 --> 00:42:52,364
Lovely to see you.
659
00:42:53,699 --> 00:42:55,284
I saw you with your assistant.
660
00:42:56,660 --> 00:42:58,912
Your daughter deserves better,
and so does Bex.
661
00:42:59,997 --> 00:43:01,248
Stop fucking around.
662
00:42:59,997 --> 00:43:01,248
Stop fucking around.
663
00:43:10,007 --> 00:43:11,008
Here you go.
664
00:43:12,259 --> 00:43:15,012
We are normally a lot better than that.
And nicer.
665
00:43:15,012 --> 00:43:19,808
Well, it's never great when your team
gets more red cards than goals, is it?
666
00:43:19,808 --> 00:43:20,726
No.
667
00:43:22,227 --> 00:43:23,854
What a shit show.
668
00:43:25,856 --> 00:43:28,025
Anyway, good news. Bantr's trending.
669
00:43:28,025 --> 00:43:29,151
- It is?
- Yeah.
670
00:43:29,151 --> 00:43:32,154
Pretty sure
the change to the bio line helped.
671
00:43:32,696 --> 00:43:33,947
What are you talking about?
672
00:43:38,368 --> 00:43:39,620
Who did this?
673
00:43:39,620 --> 00:43:42,956
I did. This afternoon,
when I uploaded the vids.
674
00:43:43,457 --> 00:43:44,833
You're welcome.
675
00:43:46,335 --> 00:43:47,628
- Shandy.
- Yeah.
676
00:43:49,213 --> 00:43:53,634
This is the opposite
of what Bantr is trying to do.
677
00:43:53,634 --> 00:43:55,969
Are you joking? They're gonna love it.
678
00:43:55,969 --> 00:43:58,555
I've literally tripled their subscribers
in an hour.
679
00:43:59,848 --> 00:44:03,227
You need to change this back, now. Please.
680
00:43:59,848 --> 00:44:03,227
You need to change this back, now. Please.
681
00:44:04,394 --> 00:44:05,395
Yeah.
682
00:44:07,481 --> 00:44:09,441
It was really lovely to meet you.
683
00:44:10,192 --> 00:44:12,486
- You too.
- Excuse me.
684
00:44:18,283 --> 00:44:20,869
Hey. Here he is!
685
00:44:21,995 --> 00:44:24,456
The Wonder Kid himself.
686
00:44:27,000 --> 00:44:28,919
The man of the hour!
687
00:44:29,670 --> 00:44:31,380
Thank you very much, Mr. Mannion.
688
00:44:31,964 --> 00:44:34,341
Please, no. "Rupert."
689
00:44:35,259 --> 00:44:36,510
Nathan.
690
00:44:37,511 --> 00:44:39,221
Thanks, Ms. Kakes. That's...
691
00:44:39,221 --> 00:44:43,642
And Nathan,
allow me to introduce Anastasia.
692
00:44:45,185 --> 00:44:46,186
Huge fan.
693
00:44:49,439 --> 00:44:50,816
Oh, my God. You're famous.
694
00:44:50,816 --> 00:44:52,234
So are you.
695
00:44:57,990 --> 00:44:59,741
Congratulations to your victory.
696
00:45:00,701 --> 00:45:01,994
Yeah. Thank you.
697
00:45:10,544 --> 00:45:12,504
Come on, Tartt! One more before dinner!
698
00:45:15,382 --> 00:45:16,550
Let's go, Coach.
699
00:45:22,973 --> 00:45:24,516
That was hard to watch.
700
00:45:24,516 --> 00:45:28,437
Thierry, West Ham's domination today
saw Ted Lasso being totally exposed
701
00:45:28,437 --> 00:45:30,522
by his former assistant Nate Shelley.
702
00:45:30,522 --> 00:45:33,942
Gary, I love this quote
from a Chinese philosopher, Laozi,
703
00:45:33,942 --> 00:45:36,612
"When the student is ready,
the teacher will appear.
704
00:45:36,612 --> 00:45:40,157
When the student is truly ready,
the teacher will disappear."
705
00:45:40,157 --> 00:45:41,241
The Greyhounds...
706
00:46:10,938 --> 00:46:12,022
- Hi, Ted.
- Hey.
707
00:46:12,606 --> 00:46:13,649
Sorry about the match.
708
00:46:13,649 --> 00:46:16,151
No. That's all right. It was a tough one.
709
00:46:16,151 --> 00:46:18,320
Henry's not here right now.
He's at a birthday party,
710
00:46:18,320 --> 00:46:19,404
- but I'll--
- No, that's okay.
711
00:46:19,404 --> 00:46:22,991
I was actually hoping just
to chat with you. You got a minute?
712
00:46:23,659 --> 00:46:25,744
Sure. Is everything okay?
713
00:46:25,744 --> 00:46:31,583
Yeah. Well-- No. You know, I just...
714
00:46:33,001 --> 00:46:35,045
I wanted to say something real quick.
715
00:46:37,965 --> 00:46:38,966
Look, I...
716
00:46:39,716 --> 00:46:44,054
I know that you and I aren't, you know,
together anymore.
717
00:46:44,596 --> 00:46:47,140
And I respect that. Okay? I do.
718
00:46:52,938 --> 00:46:55,649
But, Well, you know,
719
00:46:55,649 --> 00:46:59,152
this whole thing with you and Dr. Jacob
really ticks me off.
720
00:47:01,029 --> 00:47:04,324
And I'm upset that we didn't ever really
get to talk about it
721
00:47:04,324 --> 00:47:06,159
before it all started.
722
00:47:07,911 --> 00:47:08,912
Yeah.
723
00:47:08,912 --> 00:47:13,625
And look,
I understand that me saying all this,
724
00:47:14,293 --> 00:47:17,129
might be the wrong thing to do, but...
725
00:47:19,339 --> 00:47:22,926
I just feel like not saying it...
726
00:47:26,346 --> 00:47:27,472
isn't the...
727
00:47:29,975 --> 00:47:31,602
Well, wouldn't be the right thing either.
728
00:47:35,480 --> 00:47:37,774
'Cause we gotta raise
this little boy together, you know?
729
00:47:40,110 --> 00:47:42,571
We're stuck with each other.
We're gonna share grandkids.
730
00:47:49,203 --> 00:47:50,787
I love you, Michelle.
731
00:47:53,624 --> 00:47:54,958
And I love Henry.
732
00:47:59,838 --> 00:48:01,548
And I love our family.
733
00:47:59,838 --> 00:48:01,548
And I love our family.
734
00:48:03,759 --> 00:48:05,177
No matter what it looks like.
735
00:48:12,184 --> 00:48:13,185
Okay?
736
00:48:16,230 --> 00:48:17,231
Of course.
737
00:48:21,818 --> 00:48:24,196
Well, I'll talk to y'all soon.
738
00:48:25,155 --> 00:48:27,741
Have a good night. Tell Henry I love him.
739
00:48:28,575 --> 00:48:29,618
Good night, Ted.