1
00:00:01,126 --> 00:00:03,462
Jeff, we just got this in.
Do we have time to run this?
2
00:00:03,462 --> 00:00:05,506
- Stand by, camera one.
- In four, three, two...
3
00:00:05,506 --> 00:00:07,424
- Yeah, got it.
- All right, let's go then.
4
00:00:09,718 --> 00:00:11,553
{\an8}Hello, and welcome to Soccer Saturday.
5
00:00:11,553 --> 00:00:14,181
{\an8}I'm Jeff Stelling,
here with George Cartrick
6
00:00:14,181 --> 00:00:15,265
and Clinton Morrison.
7
00:00:15,933 --> 00:00:18,769
{\an8}Now, the hottest team in the country
is clearly Richmond
8
00:00:18,769 --> 00:00:25,275
{\an8}on a ten-game winning streak on the back
of some inspired play by Sam Obisanya.
9
00:00:25,275 --> 00:00:29,488
{\an8}Jeff, you have to think Sam Obisanya
will make his Nigeria debut,
10
00:00:29,488 --> 00:00:31,156
{\an8}or the world's gone truly mad.
11
00:00:32,115 --> 00:00:33,617
{\an8}But our top story:
12
00:00:33,617 --> 00:00:36,954
{\an8}the mysterious managerial vacancy
at West Ham United.
13
00:00:36,954 --> 00:00:41,375
{\an8}The club has suddenly parted ways
with the Wonder Kid, Nathan Shelley.
14
00:00:41,375 --> 00:00:43,669
{\an8}It's a shocker, Jeff.
They were having a great season.
15
00:00:43,669 --> 00:00:47,714
{\an8}Yeah, but look, Nate Shelley isn't
the reason West Ham are in second place.
16
00:00:47,714 --> 00:00:50,634
{\an8}I mean, "Wonder Kid"? Come on.
17
00:00:50,634 --> 00:00:53,303
{\an8}He was my kit man, for God's sake.
18
00:00:53,303 --> 00:00:56,640
{\an8}No, Rupert Mannion is the brains
behind this whole operation.
19
00:00:57,766 --> 00:01:00,811
{\an8}Okay. Let's turn our attention
to the international break.
20
00:01:00,811 --> 00:01:03,146
{\an8}National squad announcements
are trickling in.
21
00:01:03,146 --> 00:01:06,525
{\an8}Which players will get the honor
of representing their country?
22
00:01:10,320 --> 00:01:11,947
All right, fellas,
great play out there today.
23
00:01:11,947 --> 00:01:14,783
Congratulations on
yet another victorious outcome!
24
00:01:17,619 --> 00:01:18,620
That's right.
25
00:01:19,496 --> 00:01:21,039
Hey, quick reminder.
26
00:01:21,039 --> 00:01:23,667
Because of the break in our schedule
due to international play,
27
00:01:23,667 --> 00:01:26,003
there is no game next week, all right?
28
00:01:28,172 --> 00:01:30,299
All right.
Hey, look, kind of hurts my feelings
29
00:01:30,299 --> 00:01:33,051
y'all don't want to spend next weekend
with me, if I'm being honest.
30
00:01:33,051 --> 00:01:35,804
But I am the strong silent type,
so I ain't gonna let you know.
31
00:01:35,804 --> 00:01:38,682
But I'm also loud and weak,
because I, like all humans,
32
00:01:38,682 --> 00:01:40,309
contain multitudes. Am I right?
33
00:01:41,143 --> 00:01:42,436
Great speech.
34
00:01:42,436 --> 00:01:45,606
Anyhoo, we want to say good night
and good luck to the fellas on our squad
35
00:01:45,606 --> 00:01:48,358
that have been chosen to represent
their home country next week.
36
00:01:48,358 --> 00:01:49,943
Coach, who we talking about?
37
00:01:49,943 --> 00:01:54,364
Just up the way at Wembley,
making his debut for England, Jamie Tartt!
38
00:01:56,200 --> 00:01:57,034
Go!
39
00:02:01,163 --> 00:02:04,791
Taking the plane to Toronto
to play goal for Canada, Van Damme!
40
00:02:04,791 --> 00:02:06,210
He's got a plane ticket.
41
00:02:06,210 --> 00:02:10,005
Who will be going up against Mexico
and Dani Rojas!
42
00:02:14,510 --> 00:02:15,511
Oh, boy.
43
00:02:16,011 --> 00:02:18,388
Bumbercatch holding it down
for Switzerland.
44
00:02:19,348 --> 00:02:20,390
My guy!
45
00:02:20,974 --> 00:02:23,852
- Wait, hold on. Bumbercatch, you're Swiss?
- Yeah. Look at me.
46
00:02:23,852 --> 00:02:25,395
No, you're right. Yeah. All right.
47
00:02:26,396 --> 00:02:29,149
- And repping Wales, Colin Hughes!
- Hey, there he is.
48
00:02:30,067 --> 00:02:31,193
Let's go, boyo.
49
00:02:34,905 --> 00:02:35,906
Is that it?
50
00:02:36,657 --> 00:02:37,658
And that's it.
51
00:02:42,496 --> 00:02:46,500
Okay. All right, well, let's go ahead
and wish our friends safe travels
52
00:02:46,500 --> 00:02:47,835
and Godspeed,
53
00:02:47,835 --> 00:02:51,255
or whatever narcotic your deity
chooses to self-medicate with.
54
00:02:51,255 --> 00:02:53,131
Rest of y'all, see ya on Monday.
55
00:03:04,935 --> 00:03:06,270
Oi, 24.
56
00:03:06,270 --> 00:03:07,813
They fucked you, man. I'm sorry.
57
00:03:08,772 --> 00:03:09,606
It's okay.
58
00:03:09,606 --> 00:03:11,525
Hey, congrats to you though.
59
00:03:14,194 --> 00:03:15,362
Listen. You good, yeah?
60
00:03:15,362 --> 00:03:16,822
Yeah. Of course.
61
00:03:24,955 --> 00:03:26,707
Hey, yo. Congrats, bro.
62
00:03:30,169 --> 00:03:31,253
I am not your bro.
63
00:03:32,421 --> 00:03:35,841
We are now enemies,
and soon, you will be my bitch.
64
00:03:44,099 --> 00:03:45,309
What the f--
65
00:04:07,456 --> 00:04:09,625
So you're telling me it only shows up
once a month?
66
00:04:10,876 --> 00:04:13,170
- And it never skips a month?
- Only if you're pregnant.
67
00:04:14,046 --> 00:04:16,507
{\an8}Well, shoot. I got to check out
this wine delivery service.
68
00:04:16,507 --> 00:04:18,132
{\an8}Sounds like a real corker. Yes.
69
00:04:19,051 --> 00:04:20,052
Did you hear about Nathan?
70
00:04:20,052 --> 00:04:22,179
- I did.
- What do we think happened there?
71
00:04:22,804 --> 00:04:26,225
{\an8}Well, boss, I'm like an incomplete list
of Madeline Kahn's best films:
72
00:04:26,225 --> 00:04:27,309
I ain't got no clue.
73
00:04:28,268 --> 00:04:29,978
And it ain't really
none of my business anyhow.
74
00:04:29,978 --> 00:04:32,981
Ted, look,
I mean this in the nicest way possible,
75
00:04:33,565 --> 00:04:35,234
but you suck at girl talk.
76
00:04:35,234 --> 00:04:37,027
I know. I just don't like gossip.
77
00:04:37,778 --> 00:04:40,989
{\an8}It's not gossip, Ted. It's speculation.
78
00:04:41,490 --> 00:04:44,493
I've actually been hearing rumblings
of inappropriate workplace behavior
79
00:04:44,493 --> 00:04:47,496
- over at West Ham.
- See? Excellent girl talk.
80
00:04:48,622 --> 00:04:51,458
{\an8}So, chaps, what do we think?
81
00:04:52,376 --> 00:04:55,254
{\an8}Is Nathan capable of being involved
in something like that?
82
00:04:56,463 --> 00:04:58,090
- No.
- Nah.
83
00:04:58,090 --> 00:04:59,758
{\an8}- Good morning.
- Hello, Leslie.
84
00:04:59,758 --> 00:05:02,803
{\an8}So, I heard some interesting scuttlebutt
last night.
85
00:05:03,554 --> 00:05:06,014
{\an8}I don't like gossip,
but my butt don't mind a little scuttle.
86
00:05:06,014 --> 00:05:07,474
Go on, Leslie.
87
00:05:07,474 --> 00:05:09,810
Edwin Akufo's back in town.
88
00:05:09,810 --> 00:05:11,311
What now?
89
00:05:11,311 --> 00:05:12,646
Apparently, he's sniffing around
90
00:05:12,646 --> 00:05:15,732
about trying to create
a Super League of some sort.
91
00:05:15,732 --> 00:05:16,942
Where did you hear this?
92
00:05:16,942 --> 00:05:19,611
Well, Rebecca,
I am the director of Football Operations.
93
00:05:20,612 --> 00:05:23,532
And a bunch of us DFOs
have a little jazz jam band
94
00:05:23,532 --> 00:05:26,743
we call "The Directors of Beboperations."
95
00:05:27,452 --> 00:05:29,079
{\an8}Akufo came up at rehearsal.
96
00:05:30,622 --> 00:05:31,957
{\an8}This is not good.
97
00:05:33,166 --> 00:05:35,961
{\an8}I'm sorry. Why is it so bad
that a billionaire wants to put together
98
00:05:35,961 --> 00:05:37,546
{\an8}a bunch of superheroes to fight crime?
99
00:05:38,130 --> 00:05:39,965
{\an8}Ted,
you're thinking of the Justice League.
100
00:05:39,965 --> 00:05:41,425
{\an8}God, dang it. Yeah, I am.
101
00:05:42,009 --> 00:05:44,761
{\an8}Super League is when
the world's biggest and wealthiest teams
102
00:05:44,761 --> 00:05:46,096
{\an8}decide to compete against each other.
103
00:05:46,096 --> 00:05:49,766
{\an8}So, not only would
David never get to face Goliath,
104
00:05:49,766 --> 00:05:52,811
{\an8}the Davids could
cease to exist altogether.
105
00:05:53,395 --> 00:05:54,396
{\an8}Wow.
106
00:05:54,396 --> 00:05:56,899
{\an8}You know, I wouldn't be surprised
if Rupert was involved in this.
107
00:06:00,194 --> 00:06:01,612
{\an8}Speak of the devil.
108
00:06:11,371 --> 00:06:13,498
- It was Rupert.
- Yes.
109
00:06:13,498 --> 00:06:15,834
Sorry. Okay. I thought it was
the actual devil for a second.
110
00:06:15,834 --> 00:06:16,919
- Oh, yeah.
- Yeah.
111
00:06:28,639 --> 00:06:29,640
Are you alive?
112
00:06:30,224 --> 00:06:31,892
{\an8}Unfortunately, yeah.
113
00:06:34,144 --> 00:06:35,145
You're okay.
114
00:06:38,524 --> 00:06:39,525
Am I an idiot?
115
00:06:39,525 --> 00:06:41,151
Sometimes, yes.
116
00:06:41,151 --> 00:06:44,905
No, I meant for quitting my job.
117
00:06:47,074 --> 00:06:48,825
Do you wish you hadn't?
118
00:06:51,495 --> 00:06:52,663
Then there's your answer.
119
00:06:57,918 --> 00:06:59,294
{\an8}I just don't know what I'm gonna do.
120
00:07:00,003 --> 00:07:01,255
Do you need me to stay?
121
00:07:02,840 --> 00:07:06,009
{\an8}No. No, that's-- No, I'm okay.
122
00:07:08,011 --> 00:07:09,680
Do you want to come to Poland with me?
123
00:07:10,681 --> 00:07:12,933
You can help me and my family
screw in light bulbs.
124
00:07:14,017 --> 00:07:15,978
- That's very funny.
- Why is it funny?
125
00:07:18,981 --> 00:07:20,732
I don't know. Sorry. I-- No.
126
00:07:25,529 --> 00:07:27,948
- I'll see you in a few days.
- Thank you.
127
00:07:55,893 --> 00:07:57,436
Can you tell us about Coach Shelley?
128
00:08:00,647 --> 00:08:02,149
Hey, Nate! Nate!
129
00:08:17,122 --> 00:08:18,123
- Hi.
- Sorry.
130
00:08:18,123 --> 00:08:19,333
- It's all right.
- Thanks.
131
00:08:21,793 --> 00:08:22,794
Shit.
132
00:08:32,554 --> 00:08:35,640
Keeley,
you are the nicest boss I've ever had.
133
00:08:36,265 --> 00:08:37,267
Thank you, Dan.
134
00:08:37,267 --> 00:08:40,102
And definitely the hottest.
135
00:08:40,854 --> 00:08:42,438
That's a complicated compliment.
136
00:08:43,774 --> 00:08:44,775
Thank you.
137
00:08:44,775 --> 00:08:45,859
Yeah.
138
00:08:49,863 --> 00:08:52,074
Barbara, what's going on?
Are we being slowly robbed?
139
00:08:53,617 --> 00:08:56,119
Wait. I'm sorry.
You haven't spoken with Jack?
140
00:08:56,119 --> 00:08:58,163
I haven't heard from Jack in weeks.
141
00:08:58,163 --> 00:09:03,377
But she emailed me last night to say that
she was gonna reach out and tell you.
142
00:09:03,377 --> 00:09:05,045
Tell me what, Barbara?
143
00:09:10,801 --> 00:09:14,555
The board of the VC
have decided to pull funding.
144
00:09:17,057 --> 00:09:18,767
They're shutting down KJPR.
145
00:09:20,978 --> 00:09:21,979
What?
146
00:09:23,772 --> 00:09:24,606
When?
147
00:09:24,606 --> 00:09:27,276
Oh, well, don't worry,
we've got plenty of time.
148
00:09:27,276 --> 00:09:30,320
- We don't have to be out till Friday.
- It's Wednesday.
149
00:09:31,363 --> 00:09:34,366
Yeah. I suppose that is quite soon,
isn't it?
150
00:09:35,075 --> 00:09:37,369
Especially if you didn't get
the email last night.
151
00:10:06,732 --> 00:10:10,402
I mean, if he doesn't want to coach
West Ham for millions, I'll bloody do it.
152
00:10:13,238 --> 00:10:14,406
What a wanker.
153
00:10:30,172 --> 00:10:32,925
Pineapple juice or apple juice?
154
00:10:38,180 --> 00:10:39,431
Hi.
155
00:10:41,475 --> 00:10:42,601
Hey, Dani!
156
00:10:45,020 --> 00:10:46,271
Dani, what's up, man?
157
00:10:47,606 --> 00:10:48,774
He's my teammate.
158
00:10:54,154 --> 00:10:57,074
Dani, you want some chips?
159
00:11:26,186 --> 00:11:27,896
Boy, oh, boy.
160
00:11:27,896 --> 00:11:31,191
Tell you what, Sam had himself a case
of the mean reds out there today, yeah?
161
00:11:31,191 --> 00:11:32,734
I don't fucking blame him.
162
00:11:32,734 --> 00:11:35,237
It's hard to see the ball
when your eyes are full of tears.
163
00:11:36,989 --> 00:11:38,031
Hey, Sam!
164
00:11:38,782 --> 00:11:40,993
Hey, look,
I know this week ain't been easy on ya.
165
00:11:40,993 --> 00:11:44,162
But don't forget,
even the great Michael Jordan himself
166
00:11:44,162 --> 00:11:46,164
didn't make his high school varsity
basketball team.
167
00:11:46,164 --> 00:11:47,332
- Yeah?
- Yes, Coach.
168
00:11:48,458 --> 00:11:50,878
But wasn't that because
he was only a 5'10" sophomore
169
00:11:50,878 --> 00:11:53,755
and the team was in need of height,
so they sent him to the junior varsity
170
00:11:53,755 --> 00:11:55,424
with the hope that
he would develop physically?
171
00:11:55,424 --> 00:11:57,843
Which he did,
growing 5 inches the very next summer.
172
00:11:58,552 --> 00:11:59,928
I mean, if you know all the details,
173
00:11:59,928 --> 00:12:01,847
it does render the story
a little less motivational,
174
00:12:01,847 --> 00:12:03,432
but my point still stands.
175
00:12:03,432 --> 00:12:05,017
Keep your head up. Be a goldfish.
176
00:12:05,017 --> 00:12:06,685
- All right?
- Okay.
177
00:12:11,481 --> 00:12:12,482
Boom!
178
00:12:13,108 --> 00:12:16,361
Tonight, me and Jane have reserved
an axe-throwing lane at Hatchet and Rye.
179
00:12:16,945 --> 00:12:18,697
You fellas care to join the festivities?
180
00:12:19,281 --> 00:12:22,284
That sounds equal parts fun
and dangerous. What are y'all celebrating?
181
00:12:22,284 --> 00:12:25,245
Karma's speedy delivery of a shit sandwich
to the Wonder Turd.
182
00:12:25,913 --> 00:12:27,039
Here, Jane made targets.
183
00:12:31,960 --> 00:12:34,963
Don't you feel it's bad karma
to celebrate someone else's bad karma?
184
00:12:34,963 --> 00:12:36,882
No. You in?
185
00:12:36,882 --> 00:12:40,177
I'd love to, but I've got a thing.
186
00:12:43,639 --> 00:12:44,806
Here we go.
187
00:12:44,806 --> 00:12:45,974
Hey, Janey baby!
188
00:12:46,475 --> 00:12:50,521
Yeah, we're all set. Could you remember
to bring my throwing axe, please?
189
00:12:50,521 --> 00:12:53,607
No, not that one.
The one with the leather sleeve.
190
00:12:53,607 --> 00:12:55,150
You know what? Just bring 'em all.
191
00:12:57,569 --> 00:12:58,570
Yeah, we are.
192
00:12:58,570 --> 00:12:59,988
Okay. Love you too.
193
00:13:02,449 --> 00:13:03,784
How many axes you got now?
194
00:13:03,784 --> 00:13:05,911
Seventeen.
But they're not all for throwing.
195
00:13:05,911 --> 00:13:08,580
Right. But they're all here in the UK?
196
00:13:08,580 --> 00:13:11,458
Oh, yeah. Couldn't imagine being
in a different country than my axes.
197
00:13:12,626 --> 00:13:14,336
She's gonna have trouble carrying that.
198
00:13:21,593 --> 00:13:23,720
- Hey, Sam.
- Hey.
199
00:13:25,597 --> 00:13:28,934
I'm so sorry about the national team.
200
00:13:30,018 --> 00:13:33,146
Well, you know.
I guess I could have worked harder.
201
00:13:34,398 --> 00:13:36,775
Well, I think you're wonderful.
202
00:13:38,694 --> 00:13:40,112
Thank you, Rebecca.
203
00:13:45,117 --> 00:13:46,326
- See you.
- Yeah.
204
00:13:56,211 --> 00:13:57,212
Hello, Rebecca.
205
00:13:58,505 --> 00:14:00,132
Where's the Hockney I gave you?
206
00:14:01,175 --> 00:14:03,927
Got rid of it. Sorry. W--
How did you get past security?
207
00:14:04,636 --> 00:14:05,846
My old mate, Renee.
208
00:14:06,638 --> 00:14:08,265
The creepy old man
that lives in the sewers?
209
00:14:08,265 --> 00:14:09,808
Oh, Rebecca, that's rude.
210
00:14:10,475 --> 00:14:11,852
He only works in the sewer.
211
00:14:11,852 --> 00:14:14,855
Right. Well, maybe next time
you could make an appointment.
212
00:14:17,191 --> 00:14:18,233
Of course.
213
00:14:18,775 --> 00:14:21,528
So, what do you want?
214
00:14:21,528 --> 00:14:25,115
To invite you to this meeting
for the Akufo League.
215
00:14:26,742 --> 00:14:27,743
Why?
216
00:14:27,743 --> 00:14:31,163
I've wanted to extend an olive branch.
217
00:14:31,163 --> 00:14:33,749
And I think it's important
that you're part of this.
218
00:14:35,250 --> 00:14:36,793
Could be great for the game.
219
00:14:37,669 --> 00:14:40,088
Well, I will give it some thought.
220
00:14:40,672 --> 00:14:41,882
Good.
221
00:14:42,466 --> 00:14:47,888
Sneaking in here today reminded me of
the first match I ever saw at Nelson Road.
222
00:14:48,472 --> 00:14:49,890
When they used to play by candlelight.
223
00:14:52,309 --> 00:14:54,228
I look forward to hearing from you.
224
00:14:58,398 --> 00:15:00,025
What happened with Nathan Shelley?
225
00:15:03,487 --> 00:15:06,031
Some people just aren't ready
when they get their shot.
226
00:15:16,834 --> 00:15:19,002
Happy Uncle Day!
227
00:15:21,338 --> 00:15:23,924
- You know it's not a real holiday, right?
- Yes, it is.
228
00:15:24,424 --> 00:15:25,300
Right, Mummy?
229
00:15:25,300 --> 00:15:28,136
Any day that annoys Roy, holiday for me.
230
00:15:29,972 --> 00:15:31,473
I'll get it.
231
00:15:33,559 --> 00:15:36,436
Phoe told me that Uncle's Day
is her favorite holiday of the year.
232
00:15:36,436 --> 00:15:37,855
- Fuck off.
- Yeah, seriously.
233
00:15:37,855 --> 00:15:42,109
It was Uncle's Day, Uncle Roy's birthday,
and then Perchtenlaufen,
234
00:15:42,109 --> 00:15:44,778
the German holiday
where people dress up as evil spirits
235
00:15:44,778 --> 00:15:48,657
and roam the streets
in order to scare winter away.
236
00:15:48,657 --> 00:15:52,119
She might be an old soul, but
she's a proper fucking dweeb, isn't she?
237
00:15:52,119 --> 00:15:53,620
Is that your Range Rover outside?
238
00:15:53,620 --> 00:15:56,081
- No, it's my mum's.
- Oh, right, all right.
239
00:15:56,081 --> 00:15:57,624
Hey, how you doing? You all right?
240
00:15:57,624 --> 00:15:59,877
- Sorry I'm late.
- It's okay.
241
00:15:59,877 --> 00:16:02,379
You can just sit down next to Uncle Roy.
242
00:16:02,379 --> 00:16:03,422
Hello, Uncle Roy.
243
00:16:03,422 --> 00:16:05,132
What the fuck is he doing here?
244
00:16:05,883 --> 00:16:07,718
I had to invite your best friend.
245
00:16:07,718 --> 00:16:09,595
- He's not my best friend.
- He isn't my best friend.
246
00:16:10,387 --> 00:16:15,559
Well, you talk about him a lot,
and you spend every day together.
247
00:16:15,559 --> 00:16:16,894
Well, he's not.
248
00:16:17,644 --> 00:16:19,521
So, who's your best friend, Jamie?
249
00:16:20,105 --> 00:16:20,939
Probably Isaac.
250
00:16:20,939 --> 00:16:23,108
- Fuck off.
- He is.
251
00:16:23,108 --> 00:16:26,111
- That's a pound, Uncle Roy.
- Bill me.
252
00:16:26,737 --> 00:16:29,114
Okay. Now, open Jamie's gift.
253
00:16:29,907 --> 00:16:33,076
It's stupid. It's dumb. I don't know.
254
00:16:33,076 --> 00:16:34,161
Here.
255
00:16:37,581 --> 00:16:40,501
It's your original England kit
from the 2014 World Cup.
256
00:16:42,377 --> 00:16:44,004
Your name's on the back there.
257
00:16:48,592 --> 00:16:50,719
I got 'em to change the E to a U.
258
00:17:00,437 --> 00:17:01,772
I love it.
259
00:17:08,737 --> 00:17:10,614
Yeah. You owe me a pound, Jamie.
260
00:17:11,323 --> 00:17:12,532
But I didn't say nothing.
261
00:17:12,532 --> 00:17:17,037
No, but you made me think it,
and that's basically the same thing.
262
00:17:19,830 --> 00:17:21,083
Yeah, fair play.
263
00:17:22,125 --> 00:17:23,292
Okay, my turn.
264
00:17:23,961 --> 00:17:24,962
All right.
265
00:17:25,462 --> 00:17:26,713
Who's that?
266
00:17:27,923 --> 00:17:28,924
Good wrapping, that.
267
00:17:33,720 --> 00:17:35,055
I made it at school.
268
00:17:35,639 --> 00:17:39,935
The colors spell your name.
Red, orange, yellow. Roy.
269
00:17:41,937 --> 00:17:45,232
She's been very excited to give it to you.
270
00:17:45,232 --> 00:17:46,358
What do you think?
271
00:17:47,526 --> 00:17:49,319
Well, I mean, I fucking love it.
272
00:17:51,113 --> 00:17:52,447
It was worth it.
273
00:18:00,038 --> 00:18:01,248
Thank you.
274
00:18:03,333 --> 00:18:06,795
Okay. Mum and I are going to put
our costumes on for the performance.
275
00:18:08,088 --> 00:18:10,424
Heads-up, team. There is an intermission.
276
00:18:17,264 --> 00:18:20,058
- Your sister is fit.
- I will cut your eyes out.
277
00:18:33,197 --> 00:18:35,449
Simi, what's going on?
I thought we were fully booked.
278
00:18:35,449 --> 00:18:37,034
All the reservations bailed.
279
00:18:37,618 --> 00:18:39,077
Well, except one.
280
00:18:40,829 --> 00:18:43,457
Hey, you. Look who it is.
281
00:18:44,166 --> 00:18:45,501
It is Pinky Dick.
282
00:18:47,461 --> 00:18:48,462
Sorry. I mean Sam.
283
00:18:49,296 --> 00:18:50,839
Of course you remember Francis.
284
00:18:51,715 --> 00:18:54,134
Charles, this is Pinky Dick.
285
00:18:54,134 --> 00:18:55,594
I mean Sam.
286
00:18:55,594 --> 00:18:58,472
Pinky-Dick-I-mean-Sam,
this is Charles Siziba,
287
00:18:58,472 --> 00:19:01,391
- food blogger for The Times.
- It is nice to meet you.
288
00:19:02,100 --> 00:19:04,311
Edwin has told me awful things about you.
289
00:19:05,646 --> 00:19:08,941
Charles is helping me find
the best West African chef in London
290
00:19:09,441 --> 00:19:14,404
because I'm starting my own Nigerian
restaurant but 20 meters from here.
291
00:19:14,404 --> 00:19:15,781
You're doing what?
292
00:19:16,281 --> 00:19:19,117
We are going to serve
the finest Nigerian cuisine,
293
00:19:19,117 --> 00:19:23,247
along with Chicago-style hot dogs,
because it's my favorite food.
294
00:19:24,456 --> 00:19:26,875
Oh, Sam. I mean Pinky Dick.
295
00:19:27,376 --> 00:19:30,629
Mr. Akufo found a tiny piece of glass
in his food.
296
00:19:30,629 --> 00:19:32,798
I assume our meal will be complimentary?
297
00:19:33,549 --> 00:19:35,384
Yeah, sure. Whatever.
298
00:19:35,384 --> 00:19:36,468
Good man.
299
00:19:37,594 --> 00:19:42,766
It is nice to put a name
to such an ugly, horrible face.
300
00:19:47,771 --> 00:19:50,524
I'm so sorry to see
that business is not going well.
301
00:19:50,524 --> 00:19:52,442
No. Actually, we were fully booked.
302
00:19:52,442 --> 00:19:54,069
We just had
a few last-second cancellations.
303
00:19:54,069 --> 00:19:57,114
That's because
all the reservations were me.
304
00:19:58,156 --> 00:20:00,784
Hello. Ola's Chop Life?
305
00:20:00,784 --> 00:20:03,954
Can I make a reservation for eight
for Wiafe.
306
00:20:04,454 --> 00:20:07,040
David Ettlemen, party of six.
307
00:20:07,040 --> 00:20:09,418
Starkey, party of four. Fab four.
308
00:20:09,918 --> 00:20:13,255
Table for 12, please. Last name Picard.
309
00:20:13,255 --> 00:20:17,718
And please, bring out
all of your finest African cheeses.
310
00:20:21,597 --> 00:20:23,807
- Good to see you, Edwin.
- Isn't it?
311
00:20:30,689 --> 00:20:35,694
Yes, I was so sad to hear that you were
not selected for Nigeria's national team.
312
00:20:36,612 --> 00:20:40,115
But I was happy to hear that
the Nigerian government was pleased
313
00:20:40,115 --> 00:20:45,787
to accept a free $20 million check from me
to keep you off the team.
314
00:20:47,247 --> 00:20:51,793
I will never stop, you Nigerian turd.
315
00:20:52,669 --> 00:20:55,881
Never ever.
316
00:20:57,049 --> 00:20:59,760
No, never.
317
00:21:15,734 --> 00:21:17,069
Please don't do this, Francis.
318
00:21:56,817 --> 00:21:59,444
- Stop right there.
- Sorry.
319
00:21:59,444 --> 00:22:01,321
- What's the emergency?
- Nathan?
320
00:22:01,321 --> 00:22:02,406
Yeah.
321
00:22:02,406 --> 00:22:04,950
Never mind, Officer. My son is home.
322
00:22:07,619 --> 00:22:08,871
You moved the key.
323
00:22:08,871 --> 00:22:10,080
Jesus Christ.
324
00:22:11,957 --> 00:22:13,041
Hey, Mum.
325
00:22:15,377 --> 00:22:16,753
Do you want anything to eat, dear?
326
00:22:16,753 --> 00:22:19,673
No, thank you.
I just wanna sleep actually.
327
00:22:25,012 --> 00:22:26,805
Well, if you're cooking,
I could eat something.
328
00:22:26,805 --> 00:22:28,182
Lloyd, stop.
329
00:22:28,182 --> 00:22:29,266
What?
330
00:23:03,133 --> 00:23:04,051
Leslie?
331
00:23:05,677 --> 00:23:09,181
- Sorry, I didn't mean to startle you.
- It's okay. It's not too bad.
332
00:23:10,807 --> 00:23:11,808
Damn.
333
00:23:15,521 --> 00:23:16,522
How can I help, Rebecca?
334
00:23:17,439 --> 00:23:18,732
I just need some advice.
335
00:23:20,025 --> 00:23:21,777
- Keeley didn't text you back?
- She did not.
336
00:23:21,777 --> 00:23:23,237
- Ted?
- Can't find him.
337
00:23:23,237 --> 00:23:25,405
- Sassy?
- On a plane with no Wi-Fi.
338
00:23:25,405 --> 00:23:27,449
- Can you imagine that?
- Disgusting.
339
00:23:27,449 --> 00:23:29,535
- How about your mother?
- Are you fucking with me?
340
00:23:30,118 --> 00:23:32,871
I am flattered. Okay, let's do this shit.
341
00:23:36,708 --> 00:23:38,710
I don't want to be
part of the Akufo League.
342
00:23:39,294 --> 00:23:41,588
Why? Because he's
an emotionally erratic billionaire
343
00:23:41,588 --> 00:23:43,757
with the temperament
of one of those kids in Willy Wonka
344
00:23:43,757 --> 00:23:45,676
that gets murdered
at the chocolate factory?
345
00:23:46,760 --> 00:23:48,178
I don't think that's what happens, Leslie.
346
00:23:49,012 --> 00:23:52,683
I hate to break it to you, Rebecca,
but those children are dead.
347
00:23:54,476 --> 00:23:57,229
I think the only reason
Rupert has invited me in
348
00:23:57,229 --> 00:24:00,232
is because I'm a woman
and it'll make them look good.
349
00:24:01,733 --> 00:24:03,735
Who cares why Rupert invited you?
350
00:24:03,735 --> 00:24:05,404
You've got a seat at the table.
351
00:24:06,238 --> 00:24:07,739
So go and see what's what.
352
00:24:14,872 --> 00:24:16,164
Thank you, Leslie.
353
00:24:17,624 --> 00:24:21,253
And if any of the other people
start disappearing one by one
354
00:24:21,253 --> 00:24:25,549
due to a series of unfortunate accidents
seemingly caused by their own hubris,
355
00:24:25,549 --> 00:24:27,509
you get the hell out of there.
Do you hear me?
356
00:25:07,508 --> 00:25:09,134
Everything all right, dear?
357
00:25:09,134 --> 00:25:10,844
Everything? Fuck no.
358
00:25:12,221 --> 00:25:15,098
What is it called when you have
the opposite of the Midas touch?
359
00:25:15,766 --> 00:25:18,393
- The Midas shits.
- That's it. That's what I have.
360
00:25:18,936 --> 00:25:20,270
Everything I touch turns to shit.
361
00:25:21,855 --> 00:25:23,774
Shit helps things grow, love.
362
00:25:25,192 --> 00:25:26,610
Oy, I'm Keeley. What's your name?
363
00:25:29,988 --> 00:25:32,491
- Mae.
- Mae? I wasn't expecting that.
364
00:25:33,200 --> 00:25:34,284
That's a really nice name.
365
00:25:35,118 --> 00:25:36,954
- Short for anything?
- Maybe.
366
00:25:36,954 --> 00:25:38,705
And is this your place, Maybe?
367
00:25:40,374 --> 00:25:41,834
Little over 40 years.
368
00:25:42,501 --> 00:25:44,878
Wow, that's impressive.
369
00:25:46,463 --> 00:25:48,507
It's hard though, right? Being a boss?
370
00:25:49,550 --> 00:25:50,634
It has its moments.
371
00:25:52,553 --> 00:25:54,763
But for some,
it's better to follow your gut
372
00:25:55,556 --> 00:25:58,475
than pretend to be excited
by following someone else's.
373
00:26:01,937 --> 00:26:04,273
What would you do
if someone took it all away from you?
374
00:26:06,650 --> 00:26:07,651
Like the man once said,
375
00:26:08,527 --> 00:26:10,612
"Once you make it
to the top of the mountain,
376
00:26:10,612 --> 00:26:13,365
what's left for you but lightning?"
377
00:26:18,328 --> 00:26:23,041
Wait, is the lightning
a good thing or a bad thing?
378
00:26:25,794 --> 00:26:28,255
Depends whether
you're ready for it or not.
379
00:26:30,757 --> 00:26:33,135
Now, I'm gonna get you some food.
380
00:26:34,386 --> 00:26:38,098
'Cause I can't have another sad,
skinny girl pass out in my pub.
381
00:26:38,724 --> 00:26:40,184
Fucks me Yelp rating.
382
00:27:35,656 --> 00:27:36,698
Bocce balls.
383
00:27:42,913 --> 00:27:46,124
Ted! Ted!
384
00:27:53,966 --> 00:27:54,967
Hey.
385
00:28:22,202 --> 00:28:23,203
Ye--
386
00:28:41,096 --> 00:28:44,141
You know, Lanny,
when Mexico comes up here in our kitchen,
387
00:28:44,141 --> 00:28:45,809
the record books go right out the window.
388
00:28:45,809 --> 00:28:47,060
Well, for sure, Bruce.
389
00:28:47,060 --> 00:28:49,605
It's a tough game,
but there's a begrudging mutual respect
390
00:28:49,605 --> 00:28:50,606
between the two teams, hey?
391
00:28:51,190 --> 00:28:55,611
- They go together like nachos and poutine.
- Now you've made me hungry. Oh, no.
392
00:28:57,196 --> 00:28:59,323
- Mexico gains possession.
- Here we go!
393
00:28:59,323 --> 00:29:02,868
Dani Rojas is on the loose,
face-to-face with Van Damme. And--
394
00:29:04,995 --> 00:29:07,873
Oh, no! Right in the nose.
395
00:29:07,873 --> 00:29:10,375
Straight in the sniffer.
That almost seemed deliberate.
396
00:29:10,375 --> 00:29:11,668
Dani kicked the crap out of it too.
397
00:29:11,668 --> 00:29:14,546
For sure, Bruce.
He's a different fella in a Mexico shirt.
398
00:29:14,546 --> 00:29:17,007
That's a lot of blood, for gosh sakes.
399
00:29:17,007 --> 00:29:18,717
I apologize for the language there, folks.
400
00:30:09,309 --> 00:30:10,310
Hey.
401
00:30:11,645 --> 00:30:12,646
Twins.
402
00:30:13,814 --> 00:30:15,649
Fuck's sake.
403
00:32:21,608 --> 00:32:23,652
All right, go on in.
404
00:32:27,030 --> 00:32:29,366
- Have a nice day, Uncle Roy.
- You too.
405
00:32:29,366 --> 00:32:30,367
You look nice.
406
00:32:31,326 --> 00:32:32,870
- Sure.
- Bye!
407
00:32:38,750 --> 00:32:39,960
It's Coach Kent.
408
00:32:43,630 --> 00:32:45,632
- Hello, Ms. Bowen.
- You don't have to call me Ms. Bowen.
409
00:32:45,632 --> 00:32:47,718
- You can use my first name.
- Okay...
410
00:32:49,178 --> 00:32:50,387
You don't know it, do you?
411
00:32:51,805 --> 00:32:52,890
No.
412
00:32:52,890 --> 00:32:55,267
- Leann.
- Hello, Leann.
413
00:32:55,267 --> 00:32:56,476
I like your T-shirt.
414
00:32:57,394 --> 00:32:58,812
You off to protest the Vietnam War?
415
00:33:00,772 --> 00:33:02,024
Phoebe made it for me.
416
00:33:05,027 --> 00:33:07,321
- You look different.
- Well, yeah.
417
00:33:07,321 --> 00:33:10,032
I don't normally dress
like a fucking clown.
418
00:33:10,032 --> 00:33:11,742
No, I don't mean the T-shirt. I mean you.
419
00:33:11,742 --> 00:33:14,161
You seem lighter
than the last time I saw you.
420
00:33:14,161 --> 00:33:17,664
Less... stuck.
421
00:33:18,248 --> 00:33:20,542
- Stuck?
- Yeah, stuck.
422
00:33:21,919 --> 00:33:22,961
Hold on.
423
00:33:24,338 --> 00:33:27,508
Weren't you flirting with me
last time I saw you?
424
00:33:29,343 --> 00:33:31,261
I teach kids.
I don't mind cleaning up a mess.
425
00:33:33,347 --> 00:33:35,849
I just hope that mess
didn't cause too much damage.
426
00:33:47,277 --> 00:33:50,030
Fudge.
427
00:33:53,909 --> 00:33:55,494
- It's good to see you.
- Yeah, you too.
428
00:34:01,875 --> 00:34:03,585
"I don't mind cleaning up a mess."
429
00:34:04,086 --> 00:34:05,295
Smooth move, fuckwitch.
430
00:34:07,130 --> 00:34:08,590
All right, kids, let's go!
431
00:34:13,178 --> 00:34:14,346
Hi, Barbara.
432
00:34:14,346 --> 00:34:15,681
That's a nice outfit.
433
00:34:16,181 --> 00:34:19,101
Thank you. Yes.
I like clothes that tell the truth.
434
00:34:22,771 --> 00:34:24,022
I got you something.
435
00:34:34,741 --> 00:34:36,368
Thank you for all your help.
436
00:34:41,248 --> 00:34:43,458
I really wish
that we could have worked together longer.
437
00:34:43,458 --> 00:34:44,543
You're fun.
438
00:34:45,878 --> 00:34:47,504
- I am?
- Yeah.
439
00:34:51,675 --> 00:34:52,592
Thank you.
440
00:34:56,679 --> 00:34:59,349
It's just that
I have to buy the snow globe,
441
00:34:59,349 --> 00:35:00,434
or it doesn't really count.
442
00:35:02,311 --> 00:35:03,312
Okay.
443
00:35:05,063 --> 00:35:07,733
- Do you have any cash on you?
- Yes.
444
00:35:10,736 --> 00:35:12,070
It was actually 60 quid.
445
00:35:15,115 --> 00:35:17,492
I think you paid a bit too much there.
446
00:35:22,956 --> 00:35:24,124
Thank you for this.
447
00:35:26,543 --> 00:35:27,544
You're welcome.
448
00:35:29,588 --> 00:35:30,923
I'm gonna need the receipt.
449
00:35:31,715 --> 00:35:35,469
- Of course. Can I email it to you?
- Yeah, email's great.
450
00:35:35,469 --> 00:35:37,137
- Sooner the better.
- I'll get on it.
451
00:36:03,330 --> 00:36:07,125
{\an8}Nathan, your father and I are headed
to the farmers' market for a few hours.
452
00:36:07,125 --> 00:36:09,169
We love you, sweetheart.
453
00:36:20,472 --> 00:36:21,640
Hello, there. Good morning.
454
00:36:23,892 --> 00:36:25,102
- Hello, madam.
- Hello there.
455
00:36:25,102 --> 00:36:27,271
- Can I take your coat?
- Oh, yes, absolutely.
456
00:36:28,897 --> 00:36:29,898
- Thank you.
- Thank you.
457
00:36:36,446 --> 00:36:37,823
Hello, Rebecca.
458
00:36:39,741 --> 00:36:40,659
Rupert.
459
00:36:40,659 --> 00:36:43,620
Thank you for accepting my invitation.
460
00:36:44,538 --> 00:36:46,790
How could I resist the chance
of having a bunch of old men
461
00:36:46,790 --> 00:36:47,875
speak directly to my chest?
462
00:36:50,586 --> 00:36:53,088
Mr. Mannion,
you left your phone in the car.
463
00:36:54,214 --> 00:36:56,842
And your fecalist emailed your results.
464
00:36:57,467 --> 00:36:59,970
Two big thumbs up as expected.
465
00:37:00,554 --> 00:37:01,430
Wonderful.
466
00:37:02,306 --> 00:37:05,142
Ms. Bread, Rebecca Welton.
467
00:37:05,142 --> 00:37:08,187
Rebecca, this is my assistant, Ms. Bread.
468
00:37:08,770 --> 00:37:10,022
Nice to meet you.
469
00:37:16,695 --> 00:37:18,030
Excuse me.
470
00:37:22,659 --> 00:37:24,536
- New assistant?
- Yeah.
471
00:37:25,662 --> 00:37:28,415
What happened
to the corporate pixie dream girl?
472
00:37:29,208 --> 00:37:31,043
Skewed. Dramatic.
473
00:37:34,046 --> 00:37:35,380
- Shall we?
- Yes.
474
00:37:38,509 --> 00:37:40,677
So, gentlemen, hello.
475
00:37:40,677 --> 00:37:45,098
I believe most of you know Rebecca,
owner of AFC Richmond.
476
00:37:46,141 --> 00:37:49,353
It's been my title since we got divorced,
and I took the only thing he ever loved.
477
00:37:50,687 --> 00:37:51,688
Wonderful.
478
00:37:53,398 --> 00:37:55,150
- Rebecca.
- Hello, Robert.
479
00:37:55,150 --> 00:37:57,611
When Rupert told me
you were joining us today,
480
00:37:57,611 --> 00:37:59,029
I was truly excited.
481
00:38:00,072 --> 00:38:04,868
Then when you walked in, in that outfit,
I remember why.
482
00:38:09,164 --> 00:38:10,499
Greetings to you all!
483
00:38:10,499 --> 00:38:12,459
And thank you for coming.
484
00:38:13,335 --> 00:38:14,378
Francis.
485
00:38:20,717 --> 00:38:22,344
- Rebecca.
- Mr. Akufo,
486
00:38:22,344 --> 00:38:24,346
how wonderful to see you again.
487
00:38:24,346 --> 00:38:26,807
Yes, I'm very glad that you are here.
488
00:38:28,141 --> 00:38:30,811
It's nice to not be
the only minority in the room, eh?
489
00:38:33,105 --> 00:38:38,443
Gentlemen and lady, I'm sure
you're all very anxious to get started.
490
00:38:38,986 --> 00:38:41,363
But as my father would say,
491
00:38:41,363 --> 00:38:44,741
"Never talk business on an empty stomach."
492
00:38:44,741 --> 00:38:45,909
So...
493
00:38:48,620 --> 00:38:53,834
Please take your seats and let us
enjoy some delicious Ghanaian bites
494
00:38:53,834 --> 00:38:56,295
as well as some Chicago-style hot dogs,
495
00:38:56,295 --> 00:38:59,965
as enjoyed by the likes of Scottie Pippen,
Obama and Ferris Bueller.
496
00:38:59,965 --> 00:39:01,049
Please.
497
00:39:03,177 --> 00:39:05,220
Yes, please. Please sit down. Sit down.
498
00:40:30,305 --> 00:40:31,306
Thanks.
499
00:40:39,439 --> 00:40:44,236
So, now that our bellies are full,
let us talk business.
500
00:40:44,236 --> 00:40:48,031
But first,
there is one thing to take care of.
501
00:41:03,213 --> 00:41:06,341
It's okay. I will leave now.
502
00:41:06,341 --> 00:41:09,469
Yeah, no, thank you, Nicolay.
It's just easier for everybody--
503
00:41:09,469 --> 00:41:11,722
No. I get it.
504
00:41:12,431 --> 00:41:15,893
It's just the whole Russia thing.
You know, it's not a good look right now.
505
00:41:17,519 --> 00:41:19,229
You-- It's a "pull."
506
00:41:20,147 --> 00:41:21,565
You have to pull. It's a--
507
00:41:21,565 --> 00:41:25,694
It's a-- You're pushing.
It's a pu-- You have to pull the door.
508
00:41:25,694 --> 00:41:26,945
What you're doing is obviously w--
509
00:41:28,113 --> 00:41:30,324
You're pushing, and you have to pull.
510
00:41:30,324 --> 00:41:31,909
There. Okay, goodbye.
511
00:41:31,909 --> 00:41:34,953
Okay, gentlemen. And one woman.
512
00:41:34,953 --> 00:41:39,958
I invited you here to tell you
about the Akufo League.
513
00:41:39,958 --> 00:41:45,130
A global football league
made up of only the best teams.
514
00:41:45,130 --> 00:41:50,594
Yes, it will cost the fans a bit more,
and some may not be able to afford it.
515
00:41:50,594 --> 00:41:54,890
But those who can will see
the cream of the crop.
516
00:41:54,890 --> 00:41:57,893
Each matchup, a clash of titans.
517
00:41:58,393 --> 00:42:01,355
Each game, an undried dream.
518
00:42:02,189 --> 00:42:05,943
Now, in the beginning,
some people will hate it
519
00:42:06,443 --> 00:42:09,154
because some people hate change.
520
00:42:09,738 --> 00:42:14,368
But remember, at one time,
we only rode horses
521
00:42:14,368 --> 00:42:16,870
and hated the idea of automobiles.
522
00:42:17,621 --> 00:42:19,790
Now we can't live without our cars,
523
00:42:19,790 --> 00:42:23,710
and the hot dogs we just ate
are 85% horse meat.
524
00:42:24,545 --> 00:42:26,880
Change is inevitable.
525
00:42:26,880 --> 00:42:29,716
Why should football not change?
526
00:42:29,716 --> 00:42:31,593
Why should it not evolve?
527
00:42:31,593 --> 00:42:35,597
Why should your profits
not grow exponentially?
528
00:42:38,225 --> 00:42:42,479
Yes, the fans will protest.
They will whine.
529
00:42:42,479 --> 00:42:46,233
They will make up mean-spirited
but admittedly clever parody songs
530
00:42:46,233 --> 00:42:50,028
using our surnames and sing them outside
the buildings that we own.
531
00:42:50,696 --> 00:42:56,910
But in time, they will come to embrace
the superior product.
532
00:42:56,910 --> 00:43:01,707
Just as we have all embraced
the automobile...
533
00:43:03,375 --> 00:43:04,376
the smartphone...
534
00:43:06,170 --> 00:43:07,504
the squatty potty.
535
00:43:09,381 --> 00:43:13,427
The Akufo League
is the future of football.
536
00:43:14,178 --> 00:43:16,263
And the future is now.
537
00:43:19,933 --> 00:43:23,020
Francis will pass out the projections
for the first five years.
538
00:43:23,520 --> 00:43:26,690
Please take a moment to peruse.
539
00:43:37,993 --> 00:43:38,869
Thank you.
540
00:43:41,371 --> 00:43:42,372
Thank you.
541
00:44:05,646 --> 00:44:06,647
Okay.
542
00:44:36,844 --> 00:44:38,053
- Yeah.
- Yes.
543
00:44:38,053 --> 00:44:42,099
Well, makes sense to me. I'm in.
544
00:44:42,850 --> 00:44:44,184
Wonderful.
545
00:44:49,147 --> 00:44:52,943
Rebecca, what do you think?
546
00:44:56,697 --> 00:44:58,782
Is this a fucking joke?
547
00:45:00,909 --> 00:45:02,035
Excuse me?
548
00:45:14,548 --> 00:45:17,342
What do you think you're doing?
Just stop it!
549
00:45:19,386 --> 00:45:21,930
I mean, how much more money
do any of you really need?
550
00:45:24,308 --> 00:45:28,187
Why would you ever consider
taking something away from people
551
00:45:28,187 --> 00:45:30,480
that means so much to them?
552
00:45:31,106 --> 00:45:32,524
This isn't a game.
553
00:45:34,568 --> 00:45:36,820
Football isn't just a game.
554
00:45:36,820 --> 00:45:39,031
England dominating. No surprise.
555
00:45:39,031 --> 00:45:44,494
{\an8}It's one of those amazing things in life
that can make you feel shit one moment...
556
00:45:44,494 --> 00:45:47,581
You'd expect Southgate
to be looking at his bench about now,
557
00:45:47,581 --> 00:45:49,625
and we do have a substitution.
558
00:45:49,625 --> 00:45:53,420
AFC Richmond's Jamie Tartt
winning his first cap for England.
559
00:45:54,046 --> 00:45:56,215
{\an8}An unforgettable moment
and well-earned.
560
00:45:57,424 --> 00:46:01,011
And then,
like it's Christmas morning the next.
561
00:46:01,011 --> 00:46:02,304
{\an8}Tartt's wearing 24,
562
00:46:02,304 --> 00:46:06,016
{\an8}a nod to his Richmond teammate,
the spectacular Sam Obisanya.
563
00:46:06,016 --> 00:46:09,978
It has the ability to make
heroes and villains out of ordinary men.
564
00:46:20,072 --> 00:46:22,324
People love this game.
565
00:46:22,991 --> 00:46:25,035
My father loved this game.
566
00:46:25,953 --> 00:46:28,288
You all used to love this game.
567
00:46:28,997 --> 00:46:30,207
I'm sure of it.
568
00:46:35,379 --> 00:46:40,217
I knew this little boy. Working-class.
From Richmond.
569
00:46:42,261 --> 00:46:47,224
And he loved football so much,
he used to sneak into the matches
570
00:46:47,224 --> 00:46:50,477
because his family
just couldn't afford the tickets.
571
00:46:51,854 --> 00:46:55,357
And one afternoon, he finally got caught.
572
00:46:58,110 --> 00:47:03,198
And the security guard smacked him
round the face, knocked him on the ground.
573
00:47:05,659 --> 00:47:09,705
But that little boy stood up, smiled,
574
00:47:11,498 --> 00:47:13,709
kicked the security guard in the bollocks
and ran away.
575
00:47:15,210 --> 00:47:16,211
Never to return.
576
00:47:17,546 --> 00:47:22,342
Until 25 years later, when he walked in
and bought the entire club.
577
00:47:24,386 --> 00:47:26,722
And on his first day as owner,
578
00:47:26,722 --> 00:47:29,933
he went and found that same security guard
579
00:47:30,434 --> 00:47:33,645
and gave him a pay rise
without any explanation.
580
00:47:37,816 --> 00:47:42,779
Just because we own these teams
doesn't mean they belong to us.
581
00:47:47,034 --> 00:47:49,453
And I don't want to be part of something
582
00:47:49,453 --> 00:47:53,665
that could possibly destroy
this beautiful game.
583
00:47:55,042 --> 00:47:59,546
Because I would hate for all
those little kids and grown-ups out there
584
00:47:59,546 --> 00:48:06,386
to ever lose access to that beautiful,
passionate part of themselves.
585
00:48:10,432 --> 00:48:12,434
What a lovely speech.
586
00:48:16,522 --> 00:48:19,149
Now, who wants to make a lot of money?
587
00:48:55,727 --> 00:48:56,937
Jesus fucking Christ!
588
00:48:58,188 --> 00:48:59,773
Hey, sorry.
589
00:49:01,316 --> 00:49:02,401
I thought you'd gone out.
590
00:49:02,401 --> 00:49:06,238
I did. But my acid reflux
started playing up, so I came home.
591
00:49:07,531 --> 00:49:08,699
I didn't know you had acid reflux.
592
00:49:09,867 --> 00:49:10,868
I don't.
593
00:49:11,451 --> 00:49:14,037
But your mother knows
I like my alone time.
594
00:49:15,998 --> 00:49:17,416
Sorry if I disturbed you.
595
00:49:18,834 --> 00:49:20,002
No, not at all.
596
00:49:22,462 --> 00:49:24,047
I really miss hearing you play.
597
00:49:26,341 --> 00:49:27,384
You do?
598
00:49:27,384 --> 00:49:28,510
Of course.
599
00:49:30,179 --> 00:49:31,930
Thought you hated it when I played.
600
00:49:33,599 --> 00:49:35,017
Why on earth would you think that?
601
00:49:36,685 --> 00:49:38,854
'Cause you literally said that
to me once, Dad.
602
00:49:39,438 --> 00:49:41,023
You said I wouldn't practice enough.
603
00:49:41,023 --> 00:49:44,610
How I was squandering my potential
and wasting my privilege.
604
00:49:48,238 --> 00:49:50,240
You were given opportunities I never had,
605
00:49:51,241 --> 00:49:53,076
and so I expected a lot from you.
606
00:49:55,245 --> 00:49:57,039
Well, it scared the shit out of me.
607
00:49:58,373 --> 00:49:59,541
I know that now.
608
00:50:00,501 --> 00:50:01,793
And I'm sorry.
609
00:50:03,879 --> 00:50:06,089
I didn't know how to parent a genius.
610
00:50:08,509 --> 00:50:09,510
What?
611
00:50:10,594 --> 00:50:11,595
A genius.
612
00:50:13,263 --> 00:50:14,473
You're brilliant, Son.
613
00:50:16,099 --> 00:50:18,143
You've always seen
things other people couldn't,
614
00:50:18,727 --> 00:50:19,728
and that's a blessing.
615
00:50:22,773 --> 00:50:24,983
Yeah, I know it must also be a curse too.
616
00:50:27,361 --> 00:50:28,362
But you're right.
617
00:50:30,489 --> 00:50:33,492
I pushed you to be the best at everything,
even at violin.
618
00:50:36,078 --> 00:50:37,829
'Cause I thought that's what I had to do.
619
00:50:39,665 --> 00:50:41,041
I thought that's what you wanted.
620
00:50:44,002 --> 00:50:46,880
I just liked playing.
621
00:50:49,550 --> 00:50:52,135
Nathan, be successful,
don't be successful.
622
00:50:53,178 --> 00:50:54,805
I never cared about any of that.
623
00:50:56,431 --> 00:50:58,308
I just want my son to be happy.
624
00:51:27,045 --> 00:51:29,756
Well, that was all very interesting.
625
00:51:30,382 --> 00:51:31,633
Lunch soon?
626
00:51:31,633 --> 00:51:32,593
Yeah, sure.
627
00:51:32,593 --> 00:51:35,888
Rebecca, you still look lovely.
628
00:51:39,725 --> 00:51:40,934
You know,
629
00:51:40,934 --> 00:51:44,021
the last time I saw you two alone
in a room together,
630
00:51:44,605 --> 00:51:45,814
was right after your wedding.
631
00:51:48,317 --> 00:51:50,277
You really wanted me to leave.
632
00:51:56,366 --> 00:51:59,453
Hey, remember when we--
633
00:51:59,953 --> 00:52:02,539
we both snuck
into a Richmond game together?
634
00:52:03,290 --> 00:52:04,291
I do.
635
00:52:05,042 --> 00:52:08,879
Although you were the owner of the club,
so the stakes were a little bit lower.
636
00:52:11,173 --> 00:52:14,092
You got-- May I?
637
00:52:14,092 --> 00:52:15,177
Oh, yeah.
638
00:52:26,438 --> 00:52:27,648
Rupert.
639
00:52:57,886 --> 00:53:00,889
- Oi, what you doing there?
- Jesus fucking Christ!
640
00:53:01,515 --> 00:53:03,225
Look at you in color.
641
00:53:03,225 --> 00:53:05,936
- What are you doing here?
- I live here.
642
00:53:05,936 --> 00:53:07,521
But it's the middle of the day.
643
00:53:09,231 --> 00:53:10,274
What's that?
644
00:53:11,358 --> 00:53:12,901
It's for you.
645
00:53:17,698 --> 00:53:20,325
- You don't have to look now. You can--
- I don't mind.
646
00:53:35,424 --> 00:53:37,467
I still can't read your handwriting.
647
00:53:48,562 --> 00:53:52,149
"Dear Keeley,
I want you to know something.
648
00:53:53,317 --> 00:53:57,654
You never did anything wrong.
It was all me.
649
00:53:59,364 --> 00:54:02,826
I was stuck. Stuck in my own shit.
650
00:54:03,493 --> 00:54:07,372
And I didn't wanna cause you
any harm with it, so I pulled away.
651
00:54:09,583 --> 00:54:10,959
But you are..."
652
00:54:18,675 --> 00:54:24,181
You are and always will be
Keeley fucking Jones.
653
00:54:28,727 --> 00:54:30,521
And if I ever did anything--
654
00:54:32,940 --> 00:54:35,442
anything at all--
655
00:54:35,442 --> 00:54:37,861
that made you feel like that wasn't true...
656
00:54:40,405 --> 00:54:41,782
I'm so sorry.
657
00:54:45,452 --> 00:54:46,620
I love you.
658
00:54:53,252 --> 00:54:55,587
"Sincerely yours, Roy Kent. XOXO."
659
00:55:03,720 --> 00:55:05,347
You are the only Roy I know.
660
00:55:05,931 --> 00:55:09,142
- Well, I didn't want to assume.
- No.
661
00:55:18,110 --> 00:55:19,111
Thank you.
662
00:55:28,996 --> 00:55:29,997
Okay.
663
00:55:44,386 --> 00:55:45,387
I win.
664
00:55:46,555 --> 00:55:47,848
Come on.
665
00:55:51,560 --> 00:55:52,561
Come on.
666
00:56:03,655 --> 00:56:04,740
Have you been shot?
667
00:56:04,740 --> 00:56:07,284
I just convinced
a roomful of Rupert's dickhead friends
668
00:56:07,284 --> 00:56:08,827
to pull out of the Akufo League.
669
00:56:08,827 --> 00:56:11,705
- Oh, no!
- Oh, no, it's very good. Hug me.
670
00:56:11,705 --> 00:56:14,625
Oh, yes! I'm so proud of you!
671
00:56:14,625 --> 00:56:16,543
Even though I don't totally get it.
672
00:56:16,543 --> 00:56:18,462
Thank you. Wait.
673
00:56:18,462 --> 00:56:21,548
Now that I know that you're actually
alive, I'm very cross with you.
674
00:56:21,548 --> 00:56:22,925
Where the hell have you been?
675
00:56:24,718 --> 00:56:26,470
And they just pulled your funding?
676
00:56:27,304 --> 00:56:30,057
Arseholes. Why didn't you tell me?
677
00:56:31,183 --> 00:56:32,684
Well, I couldn't find the right time.
678
00:56:34,311 --> 00:56:35,687
And the right way.
679
00:56:36,939 --> 00:56:38,273
And I didn't want to.
680
00:56:39,733 --> 00:56:41,735
Well, they are idiots.
681
00:56:41,735 --> 00:56:44,655
Because you, Keeley Jones,
are a bloody marvel.
682
00:56:47,616 --> 00:56:49,076
How much money were they putting in?
683
00:56:50,077 --> 00:56:53,121
No. I'm not letting you do that.
It's a lot.
684
00:56:53,121 --> 00:56:56,416
Oh, shut up. My money, my choice.
Come on, tell me.
685
00:57:03,841 --> 00:57:04,842
What are you doing?
686
00:57:04,842 --> 00:57:07,344
This is how they do it in the movies.
687
00:57:16,228 --> 00:57:17,688
Are you joking?
688
00:57:18,480 --> 00:57:19,439
I told you.
689
00:57:20,649 --> 00:57:22,484
I think I have
that much money on me in cash.
690
00:57:23,110 --> 00:57:24,611
- No.
- Yes.
691
00:57:24,611 --> 00:57:26,154
- No!
- Yes.
692
00:57:27,197 --> 00:57:28,282
Thank you!
693
00:57:31,660 --> 00:57:33,912
- Rupert tried to kiss me.
- What?
694
00:57:35,038 --> 00:57:36,206
Did your lips touch?
695
00:57:36,206 --> 00:57:38,125
No, I pulled back straightaway.
696
00:57:39,960 --> 00:57:43,380
And I just looked at him
and made it all so clear.
697
00:57:45,549 --> 00:57:48,177
Babe, that's huge.
698
00:57:50,554 --> 00:57:55,058
Jesus. Can you imagine if you fell for it,
and you got back with Rupert?
699
00:57:55,058 --> 00:57:59,563
After all that floppy cock has done,
you would have to be insane.
700
00:57:59,563 --> 00:58:02,399
You would have to be
at the bottom of your emotional barrel
701
00:58:02,399 --> 00:58:04,318
to do something that dumb, right?
702
00:58:19,541 --> 00:58:20,626
Hi.
703
00:59:00,332 --> 00:59:01,750
Thanks, Renee.
704
00:59:08,006 --> 00:59:09,591
We've done some restructuring,
705
00:59:09,591 --> 00:59:16,223
but KJPR would still love to help you
take your sunglasses global, Ms. Jayye.
706
00:59:18,600 --> 00:59:22,437
I would maybe say
"ambitious nightmare" over "crazy."
707
00:59:22,437 --> 00:59:25,065
But yes, we have parted ways with Shandy.
708
00:59:25,732 --> 00:59:30,195
Okay. Of course. Great.
Yeah, talk to you soon.
709
00:59:32,030 --> 00:59:33,907
- Nice. Okay.
- Ms. Jones.
710
00:59:36,910 --> 00:59:39,580
Barbara, hi. What are you doing here?
711
00:59:41,623 --> 00:59:44,585
I need to give this back to you.
712
00:59:48,422 --> 00:59:50,549
I've given Jack my resignation,
713
00:59:50,549 --> 00:59:55,053
and I only buy a snow globe
when I leave a job.
714
00:59:56,638 --> 00:59:59,308
I mean, that is,
if you're looking for a CFO.
715
00:59:59,308 --> 01:00:01,393
I mean, I might not-- It's--
716
01:00:11,904 --> 01:00:13,030
Would you mind loosening your grip?
717
01:00:13,030 --> 01:00:15,657
'Cause I need to get the receipt
so you can reimburse me.
718
01:00:15,657 --> 01:00:17,034
Thank you.
719
01:00:26,960 --> 01:00:27,961
How are you?
720
01:00:34,885 --> 01:00:35,761
Hola, amigo.
721
01:00:37,095 --> 01:00:38,430
Hola.
722
01:00:38,430 --> 01:00:40,098
How's your nose feeling, man?
723
01:00:41,391 --> 01:00:42,226
It feels broken.
724
01:00:44,311 --> 01:00:45,687
It was such a crazy game, right?
725
01:00:46,271 --> 01:00:48,106
I mean, yeah. Yeah, it was.
726
01:00:48,941 --> 01:00:50,359
So many memories.
727
01:00:52,152 --> 01:00:55,614
He's hit the ball with his nose.
Top ten moments in sports history.
728
01:00:55,614 --> 01:00:57,574
- You good?
- Hey. Yeah, not bad.
729
01:01:21,431 --> 01:01:22,975
So where are you from originally?
730
01:01:23,809 --> 01:01:24,810
None of your business.
731
01:01:24,810 --> 01:01:27,396
Yeah, it is a bit personal.
732
01:01:55,549 --> 01:01:56,633
I'm from Peoria.
733
01:02:06,143 --> 01:02:08,312
- Morning, boss.
- Good morning, Ted.
734
01:02:08,812 --> 01:02:11,106
That's cool! Did you draw that?
735
01:02:12,608 --> 01:02:14,151
No, Ted, that's a David Hockney.
736
01:02:14,151 --> 01:02:16,111
Oh, well, he's a very talented little boy.
737
01:02:16,737 --> 01:02:17,988
There you go.
738
01:02:20,741 --> 01:02:25,370
Ted, I want to share something with you
that I've realized recently.
739
01:02:25,370 --> 01:02:27,831
How weird it is that Margherita pizza
doesn't have alcohol in it?
740
01:02:27,831 --> 01:02:28,790
I'm with you, sister.
741
01:02:28,790 --> 01:02:33,504
No, Ted. I've realized
I no longer care if I beat Rupert.
742
01:02:34,421 --> 01:02:35,923
- Oh, yeah?
- Yeah.
743
01:02:36,632 --> 01:02:38,133
I mean, I still want to win.
744
01:02:39,384 --> 01:02:40,636
But for all of us.
745
01:02:43,180 --> 01:02:44,348
For Richmond.
746
01:02:45,849 --> 01:02:47,184
I wanna win for us too.
747
01:02:53,023 --> 01:02:55,067
It just feels like it's ceremonial
at this point.
748
01:02:55,067 --> 01:02:58,403
As long as none of that tree piss gets
in my mouth, I'm actually okay with it.