1 00:00:23,793 --> 00:00:25,793 ["Home For The Holidays" playing] 2 00:00:31,293 --> 00:00:38,293 ♪ Oh there's no place like home For the holidays ♪ 3 00:00:39,084 --> 00:00:45,043 ♪ 'Cause no matter How far away you roam ♪ 4 00:00:45,126 --> 00:00:47,084 -[woman] Merry Christmas. -Merry Christmas. 5 00:00:47,168 --> 00:00:52,668 [on radio] ♪ …Pine for the sunshine Of a friendly gaze ♪ 6 00:00:53,876 --> 00:00:58,543 ♪ For the holidays, you can't beat home Sweet home ♪ 7 00:00:58,626 --> 00:00:59,459 [scoffs] 8 00:00:59,543 --> 00:01:00,959 [chattering] 9 00:01:02,084 --> 00:01:05,418 [male agent] And our kitchen connects to a little dining room right over there. 10 00:01:05,501 --> 00:01:07,626 Now you mentioned you wanted an open concept. 11 00:01:07,709 --> 00:01:10,793 -Cool, I am obsessed with open concept. -Yes. [chuckles] 12 00:01:10,876 --> 00:01:12,793 Open is my favorite concept. 13 00:01:12,876 --> 00:01:15,834 Well, here they are, Pam and Jeff McKenzie, the owners. 14 00:01:15,918 --> 00:01:18,918 I was just telling the Breckins that they could probably knock down 15 00:01:19,001 --> 00:01:22,293 some of these walls and make it one, big, open space. 16 00:01:22,376 --> 00:01:24,334 -Not mad at that. [laughs] -Yes. 17 00:01:24,418 --> 00:01:26,168 Well, you just wanna be careful, 18 00:01:26,251 --> 00:01:29,043 'cause if those are load-baring walls and you knock one down, 19 00:01:29,126 --> 00:01:30,584 the whole place could collapse. 20 00:01:30,668 --> 00:01:31,876 -Mmm. Bummer. -Really? 21 00:01:31,959 --> 00:01:34,959 Um, it's not a Jenga tower, Jeff. 22 00:01:36,209 --> 00:01:38,418 [laughing] It's not a Jenga tower, Jeff. 23 00:01:39,418 --> 00:01:42,543 And Pam is a teacher at Winnetka Elementary. 24 00:01:42,626 --> 00:01:45,251 Am I right? Yes. The schools here are amazing. 25 00:01:46,043 --> 00:01:47,418 Correct, Jeff? 26 00:01:47,501 --> 00:01:52,751 Um, yeah. Some of the best in the state. They are totally lit. 27 00:01:53,251 --> 00:01:54,459 -Aw. -Oh. [chuckles] 28 00:01:54,543 --> 00:01:57,501 Especially since they put in new metal detectors. 29 00:01:58,126 --> 00:01:59,626 -Oh. -Okay. 30 00:01:59,709 --> 00:02:01,709 Jeff. What are you doing? 31 00:02:01,793 --> 00:02:03,168 Uh, Jeff, uh, 32 00:02:03,251 --> 00:02:06,001 could you go get some more bottled water to everyone. 33 00:02:06,084 --> 00:02:07,293 Yep. 34 00:02:10,168 --> 00:02:11,834 Can you get some more bottled water? 35 00:02:11,918 --> 00:02:13,626 Ooh. Mm-hmm. Yep. 36 00:02:14,418 --> 00:02:16,334 [scoffs] Jeff. 37 00:02:16,418 --> 00:02:20,501 -[boy] Mum, I really have to pee. -I cannot believe you need to go again. 38 00:02:20,584 --> 00:02:23,084 I told you to use the restroom in the coffee shop. 39 00:02:23,168 --> 00:02:26,001 After Uncle Stu had been in there? Really? 40 00:02:26,084 --> 00:02:28,668 Did you see how many deviled eggs he had for lunch? 41 00:02:28,751 --> 00:02:30,459 Oh, goodness. Um. 42 00:02:30,543 --> 00:02:32,459 You'll just have to wait till we get home. 43 00:02:32,543 --> 00:02:34,709 You sure about that? Do the maths. 44 00:02:34,793 --> 00:02:39,626 Six soda refills into one, tiny, ten-year-old's bladder does not go. 45 00:02:39,709 --> 00:02:41,209 I'm-- [sighs] 46 00:02:41,293 --> 00:02:42,918 [groaning] 47 00:02:43,001 --> 00:02:44,001 [sighs] 48 00:02:46,459 --> 00:02:49,293 -Okay. I've got an idea. -What? 49 00:02:49,376 --> 00:02:51,293 You're gonna have to pretend with Mummy. 50 00:02:51,376 --> 00:02:54,001 We're gonna have to pretend we're going to buy a house. 51 00:02:55,668 --> 00:02:57,376 [toilet flushes] 52 00:03:01,793 --> 00:03:03,793 Ooh! Can I get one of those? 53 00:03:03,876 --> 00:03:06,001 Uh, that might be a question for your parents, 54 00:03:06,084 --> 00:03:08,084 just 'cause there's a lot of sugar in them, so… 55 00:03:08,168 --> 00:03:09,168 Oh. Fine. 56 00:03:09,918 --> 00:03:13,376 Wow, you're so tall. You almost look like Frankenstein. 57 00:03:13,959 --> 00:03:18,084 Oh, you mean Frankenstein's monster. Frankenstein is the doctor, FYI. 58 00:03:18,584 --> 00:03:19,793 [grunts] 59 00:03:19,876 --> 00:03:22,793 Uh. Cool dolls. 60 00:03:22,876 --> 00:03:25,501 [chuckles] Well, they're not mine. 61 00:03:25,584 --> 00:03:27,376 Um. They belonged to my mother. 62 00:03:28,543 --> 00:03:29,376 Sure they did. 63 00:03:30,334 --> 00:03:32,918 Oh! What's wrong with this one? 64 00:03:33,709 --> 00:03:34,959 Yeah, I don't know. 65 00:03:35,043 --> 00:03:39,709 But they're very delicate, so why don't we just leave them right there. 66 00:03:40,209 --> 00:03:42,459 Oh. Little boy doesn't wanna share his dolly? 67 00:03:43,418 --> 00:03:44,334 Excuse me? 68 00:03:44,418 --> 00:03:46,876 Ah, I get it. You're one of those guys. 69 00:03:47,626 --> 00:03:49,876 -What do you mean? -I don't know. You tell me. 70 00:03:50,584 --> 00:03:52,459 -There you are. -Oh! Hi, Mom. 71 00:03:52,543 --> 00:03:54,584 Doesn't he look like Frankenstein to you? 72 00:03:55,293 --> 00:03:58,126 I-- Max. I am so sorry. 73 00:03:58,209 --> 00:04:00,584 No, he doesn't look like Frankenstein. 74 00:04:00,668 --> 00:04:02,709 He looks like Frankenstein's monster. 75 00:04:02,793 --> 00:04:04,626 I'm sorry. Has he been bothering you? 76 00:04:04,709 --> 00:04:06,501 No. He's a delight. 77 00:04:07,043 --> 00:04:08,834 Aw, well, he has his moments. 78 00:04:08,918 --> 00:04:11,168 Ooh! Is that a Schneider Kinder? 79 00:04:11,251 --> 00:04:14,751 I saw these on Treasure Trunk, that antiques show. I love that show. 80 00:04:15,876 --> 00:04:20,543 There was this elderly lady who'd bought one at a garage sale for about $10. 81 00:04:20,626 --> 00:04:23,168 And then it ended up going for about $5,000. 82 00:04:23,251 --> 00:04:27,043 Wow, 5,000 bucks for an ugly, little porcelain kid. 83 00:04:27,584 --> 00:04:30,168 I didn't get half that for selling my real kids. 84 00:04:30,251 --> 00:04:31,168 [groans] 85 00:04:31,251 --> 00:04:32,293 [chuckles] 86 00:04:33,376 --> 00:04:34,376 Yeah? 87 00:04:34,459 --> 00:04:36,501 -I think we should go home. -Oh, yay. 88 00:04:36,584 --> 00:04:41,418 I can't wait to go home and share one toilet with nine bloomin' cousins. 89 00:04:41,501 --> 00:04:44,584 Maxwell Johan Mercer. What is with you today, hmm? 90 00:04:44,668 --> 00:04:46,876 Carol Ellen Mercer, take a guess? 91 00:04:46,959 --> 00:04:50,793 You know what? How's about we just spend Christmas in Tokyo without you? 92 00:04:50,876 --> 00:04:53,251 -Great idea. -[Carol] I'll leave Grammy with you. 93 00:04:53,334 --> 00:04:55,793 -[Max] Oh, yes, Grammy. -[Carol] Then you'll have to go to bed 94 00:04:55,876 --> 00:04:58,168 at 6:00 p.m. every evening and help her with her bath. 95 00:04:58,251 --> 00:05:00,751 Oh, that sounds great. Where do I sign up? 96 00:05:01,834 --> 00:05:03,876 No McDonald's for you on the way home. 97 00:05:03,959 --> 00:05:05,334 What? Mum. 98 00:05:06,001 --> 00:05:08,376 You can't promise a kid McDonald's and not deliver. 99 00:05:08,459 --> 00:05:09,876 Ooh. 100 00:05:09,959 --> 00:05:11,459 What a McShame. 101 00:05:13,668 --> 00:05:14,668 [sighs] 102 00:05:16,043 --> 00:05:17,251 [drink lid pops] 103 00:05:20,876 --> 00:05:22,959 Ooh. That's good. 104 00:05:25,334 --> 00:05:27,918 -[grunts] -Darling, home. Car. Now. Come on. 105 00:05:40,709 --> 00:05:43,543 I'm sorry I lashed out at you, but I just don't see why 106 00:05:43,626 --> 00:05:46,709 we have to share our house with every stupid relative we have. 107 00:05:46,793 --> 00:05:48,501 I mean, it's Christmas. 108 00:05:48,584 --> 00:05:51,834 Exactly, and Christmas is all about spending time with family. 109 00:05:52,876 --> 00:05:56,418 Even if everything they do makes you anxious or furious and insane. 110 00:05:57,668 --> 00:05:59,751 Because that is the meaning of Christmas. 111 00:06:00,334 --> 00:06:01,168 [sighs] 112 00:06:01,959 --> 00:06:03,043 [chuckles] 113 00:06:07,376 --> 00:06:09,793 All right, McKenzies. We have chummed the-- 114 00:06:10,293 --> 00:06:13,918 Chummed the waters. And I think we've gotten a couple of nibbles. 115 00:06:14,001 --> 00:06:16,376 Now I know you guys wanna sell as soon as possible, 116 00:06:16,459 --> 00:06:18,709 but I don't think we're gonna get any major bites 117 00:06:18,793 --> 00:06:20,293 until after the holiday season. 118 00:06:21,209 --> 00:06:22,209 I don't know. 119 00:06:22,293 --> 00:06:26,418 The guy Jeff saw looking through my underwear drawer seemed interested, no? 120 00:06:27,168 --> 00:06:30,709 Yes, but I don't think in buying the house. But don't worry. 121 00:06:30,793 --> 00:06:33,959 The Breckins are circling the boat, so I'll stay on top of them. 122 00:06:34,501 --> 00:06:35,834 [vehicle honks, laughing] 123 00:06:36,376 --> 00:06:37,543 The kids are home. 124 00:06:38,168 --> 00:06:40,751 What's happening? Why are we scared of the kids? 125 00:06:40,834 --> 00:06:42,668 We haven't told them we're selling the house. 126 00:06:46,084 --> 00:06:47,418 Hey! 127 00:06:48,001 --> 00:06:48,918 Oh, hi. 128 00:06:49,543 --> 00:06:52,376 Hi, guys. I thought you were gonna call after the movie was over. 129 00:06:52,459 --> 00:06:54,584 Oh, no, we just took an Uber. 130 00:06:57,876 --> 00:06:59,418 -You good? -Oh, yeah. 131 00:06:59,959 --> 00:07:01,876 Yeah, I'm doing some thinking, you know? 132 00:07:01,959 --> 00:07:04,376 This is a very good spot for thinking. 133 00:07:05,959 --> 00:07:06,959 Hmm. 134 00:07:07,876 --> 00:07:09,876 -Mm-hmm. -Mm-hmm. 135 00:07:10,501 --> 00:07:12,751 -I love this space. -Oh. 136 00:07:13,251 --> 00:07:14,376 Who are you? 137 00:07:15,376 --> 00:07:19,126 -I'm, uh-- -This is Gavin. And he is, um-- 138 00:07:19,209 --> 00:07:20,793 Your personal trainer. That-- Yes. 139 00:07:20,876 --> 00:07:24,668 -I'm gonna be training your flabby dad. -Hmm? 140 00:07:25,251 --> 00:07:26,084 Balloons? 141 00:07:26,168 --> 00:07:29,626 These are a gesture to say congratulations for taking your first step. 142 00:07:29,709 --> 00:07:32,001 Congratulations, man. You got to take care of yourself. 143 00:07:32,084 --> 00:07:34,543 We're gonna get rid of that jelly belly, Dad. Am I right? 144 00:07:34,626 --> 00:07:36,293 Get rid of the jelly belly. 145 00:07:36,376 --> 00:07:38,959 We're gonna put some muscle on that flat, pancake butt. 146 00:07:39,043 --> 00:07:40,751 -Thank you, Gavin. -Yeah. 147 00:07:40,834 --> 00:07:43,918 I'm just gonna take off real quick, and I'm gonna see y'all later. 148 00:07:44,001 --> 00:07:46,334 And I'm looking forward to that butt. 149 00:07:47,501 --> 00:07:49,334 [children shouting, chattering] 150 00:07:51,543 --> 00:07:52,543 [man shouts] 151 00:07:52,626 --> 00:07:53,584 [children arguing] 152 00:07:53,668 --> 00:07:56,918 -Can I have a go? Can I have a go? -You do it! 153 00:07:57,001 --> 00:07:58,584 -Please? -No, you! 154 00:07:59,459 --> 00:08:01,584 -Please, just one quick go. -[shrieks] Ow! 155 00:08:02,251 --> 00:08:05,584 -Max, clean up all this crap right now. -Sorry, Dad. 156 00:08:05,668 --> 00:08:06,918 I just stepped on a Lego. 157 00:08:07,001 --> 00:08:09,209 It's the most painful thing in the world. 158 00:08:09,709 --> 00:08:12,043 -[video game blasting] -[boy] I'm winning over here. 159 00:08:12,126 --> 00:08:14,209 -[TV blaring] -[children squealing] 160 00:08:14,293 --> 00:08:18,126 I understand that our flight was canceled and rebooked. 161 00:08:18,209 --> 00:08:21,626 No, my problem is that you have split our family onto two separate flights. 162 00:08:21,709 --> 00:08:22,709 [children arguing] 163 00:08:22,793 --> 00:08:25,876 I'm sorry, can you speak up, please? It's very loud in here. 164 00:08:25,959 --> 00:08:28,626 [boy 2] You can never catch me. Jerk! 165 00:08:29,126 --> 00:08:30,709 -[distant screaming] -[grunts] 166 00:08:30,793 --> 00:08:33,001 Don't touch me, perv. I'm your sister. 167 00:08:33,084 --> 00:08:34,126 [children screaming] 168 00:08:35,793 --> 00:08:38,709 -Homebot, what year is it in Japan? -[machine beeps] 169 00:08:38,793 --> 00:08:40,543 [Homebot speaking German] 170 00:08:40,626 --> 00:08:43,626 Guys, seriously, who keeps swapping the Homebot to German? 171 00:08:43,709 --> 00:08:45,543 -Hey! -Homebot, nein! Nein! 172 00:08:45,626 --> 00:08:46,626 Ha ha! 173 00:08:46,709 --> 00:08:49,084 -Guys, Homebot is not a toy-- -[toy gun rattling] 174 00:08:49,168 --> 00:08:52,251 No, no, stop! Stop it! Homebot is not a toy! 175 00:08:52,334 --> 00:08:54,084 I'm sick of this bullsh-- 176 00:08:57,001 --> 00:09:00,834 We don't have to tell Santa about that, right, Goobie? 177 00:09:01,501 --> 00:09:03,876 -[children yelling] -You need to project when you speak. 178 00:09:04,459 --> 00:09:07,376 -Sir, I am not taking a tone with you. -Mum. 179 00:09:07,459 --> 00:09:11,584 I'm simply saying that you have put me on a different flight to my children. 180 00:09:11,668 --> 00:09:13,459 -Mum. -The computer won't let you? 181 00:09:13,543 --> 00:09:15,959 -What is the computer? Is it God? -[man] Guys, guys-- 182 00:09:16,043 --> 00:09:18,709 -Mum. Mum! -[man] Guess what? Spanking's on the menu! 183 00:09:18,793 --> 00:09:22,501 Max, please! You are not the only person in this house, darling. 184 00:09:23,709 --> 00:09:24,876 I wish I was. 185 00:09:24,959 --> 00:09:27,918 Boys, don't make me run. I have tendinitis. 186 00:09:28,001 --> 00:09:29,293 Move, Max. 187 00:09:29,376 --> 00:09:32,001 -Lay down your arms! -[Carol] Americans, please! 188 00:09:32,084 --> 00:09:34,209 [children shrieking] 189 00:09:34,293 --> 00:09:35,918 -[sighs] -[Carol] Pizza! Lovely. 190 00:09:36,001 --> 00:09:38,251 -How many do you have? -Three pepperonis and three pineapples. 191 00:09:38,334 --> 00:09:40,001 -Let's just get-- -Everybody loves pineapple. 192 00:09:40,084 --> 00:09:42,293 [woman] I've still gotta do some packing and some laundry. 193 00:09:42,376 --> 00:09:44,168 [Carol] Everybody, pizza! 194 00:09:44,251 --> 00:09:48,876 Can you come and eat, please? Seriously. We're gonna be up at 5:00 a.m. 195 00:09:48,959 --> 00:09:50,543 [faintly] Stop, please! 196 00:09:50,626 --> 00:09:52,626 [Carol and children arguing] 197 00:09:56,959 --> 00:10:00,001 [Carol] Stop. You'll break your neck. And look at your suitcases. 198 00:10:01,043 --> 00:10:02,293 [sighs] 199 00:10:16,584 --> 00:10:18,168 -[crashing] -[chuckling] 200 00:10:18,251 --> 00:10:20,834 We expect major, major delays at the airport. 201 00:10:20,918 --> 00:10:23,293 We don't know when O'Hare is gonna be able to get back… 202 00:10:23,376 --> 00:10:25,584 What was that today? Metal detectors? 203 00:10:25,668 --> 00:10:29,959 What? They have them. I'm sorry. Is that not "lit"? 204 00:10:30,043 --> 00:10:33,918 Okay, we are trying to sell the house, Jeff. 205 00:10:34,001 --> 00:10:36,209 You're the one who said it's our only option, 206 00:10:36,293 --> 00:10:38,126 so I need you on my team, okay? 207 00:10:38,959 --> 00:10:41,251 I know. I know. I just-- 208 00:10:41,334 --> 00:10:45,626 Today, it felt real, and I didn't like it. 209 00:10:45,709 --> 00:10:47,168 You think I do? 210 00:10:47,251 --> 00:10:50,126 I always thought we'd get old and weird in this house. 211 00:10:50,209 --> 00:10:52,459 We've done the math. We can't afford it on my salary alone. 212 00:10:52,543 --> 00:10:55,334 Yeah, but I crushed my interview with IBM. 213 00:10:55,418 --> 00:10:58,043 You crushed it. Crushed it! 214 00:10:58,793 --> 00:11:00,501 But that was three months ago. 215 00:11:00,584 --> 00:11:04,918 Any company with a brain needs a good data migration manager, okay? 216 00:11:05,001 --> 00:11:07,751 I wouldn't trust an algorithm to port over a MySQL database 217 00:11:07,834 --> 00:11:10,168 to a new server without any human oversight. 218 00:11:11,918 --> 00:11:13,668 -[sighs] -Me neither. 219 00:11:14,501 --> 00:11:17,334 But it might take a while to find another job. 220 00:11:17,418 --> 00:11:20,626 You said it yourself. The data migration boom is over. 221 00:11:21,918 --> 00:11:23,084 It's the cloud. 222 00:11:24,501 --> 00:11:25,584 The cloud. 223 00:11:27,001 --> 00:11:30,293 So I need you to get on board, okay? 224 00:11:31,209 --> 00:11:34,209 Come on. It's our last Christmas here. 225 00:11:34,293 --> 00:11:36,293 Let's try to enjoy it. 226 00:11:39,168 --> 00:11:41,543 Tons of fun. 227 00:11:41,626 --> 00:11:42,876 [blows raspberry] 228 00:11:43,626 --> 00:11:45,168 [snoring softly] 229 00:11:46,084 --> 00:11:48,251 [phone ringing] 230 00:11:48,334 --> 00:11:50,084 [snoring continues] 231 00:11:55,459 --> 00:11:57,293 [phone vibrating] 232 00:11:58,043 --> 00:11:59,668 [grumbles] 233 00:12:03,709 --> 00:12:04,709 Hunter? 234 00:12:04,793 --> 00:12:08,959 [Hunter] Hey, Pama-lama-ding-dong! Guess what? We're outside! 235 00:12:09,043 --> 00:12:10,501 [line disconnects] 236 00:12:11,418 --> 00:12:13,043 -Get up. -[groans] Queen Latifah. 237 00:12:13,126 --> 00:12:15,084 -Get up. Your brother's here. -[grunts] 238 00:12:15,168 --> 00:12:16,584 [groans] 239 00:12:16,668 --> 00:12:17,668 God. 240 00:12:23,668 --> 00:12:24,501 [horn honks] 241 00:12:24,584 --> 00:12:26,084 [sighs] 242 00:12:29,626 --> 00:12:31,459 [groans] Damn it. 243 00:12:33,584 --> 00:12:35,001 Gosh, I miss the snow! 244 00:12:35,959 --> 00:12:38,834 -Hey. What are you doing-- -Doing here? 245 00:12:38,918 --> 00:12:41,793 We flew in early to get ahead of snowpocalypse or whatever. 246 00:12:41,876 --> 00:12:43,459 Snowmageddon. 247 00:12:43,543 --> 00:12:45,376 Snowpocalypse is better. 248 00:12:45,459 --> 00:12:47,626 Hey, babe. Hurry up. 249 00:12:48,793 --> 00:12:50,293 -Coming, baby! -Who's that? Aah. 250 00:12:50,376 --> 00:12:52,376 Pamuel L. Jackson! Bring it in. 251 00:12:52,459 --> 00:12:53,959 Hi, Hunter. Hi. 252 00:12:54,709 --> 00:12:56,626 Here she is! 253 00:12:57,334 --> 00:12:59,209 -[woman gasps] -[Hunter] Oh. Careful. 254 00:13:10,168 --> 00:13:11,334 -Okay! Hey. -Oh! 255 00:13:11,418 --> 00:13:14,418 Oh, we would've called, but we thought it would be fun to surprise you. 256 00:13:14,501 --> 00:13:15,584 -Yeah. -Are you surprised? 257 00:13:15,668 --> 00:13:18,084 We are surprised. We're very surprised. 258 00:13:18,168 --> 00:13:19,626 I know. It's so cute here. 259 00:13:19,709 --> 00:13:21,709 -[girl] Aunt Mei! -So quaint-- Hi! 260 00:13:21,793 --> 00:13:22,793 Hi, my adorables. 261 00:13:22,876 --> 00:13:24,501 I didn't think you were coming till tomorrow. 262 00:13:24,584 --> 00:13:25,584 I'm here now. 263 00:13:25,668 --> 00:13:29,293 We all thought she was coming tomorrow, but she's come in the dead of night. 264 00:13:30,001 --> 00:13:31,793 -Hey, Ollie, look who it is. -[music playing] 265 00:13:31,876 --> 00:13:35,293 -It's Uncle Jeff. Hey. [laughs] -Hey, buddy! 266 00:13:35,376 --> 00:13:37,084 -Ollie, look! Snow! -[Ollie coughing] 267 00:13:38,001 --> 00:13:39,209 Good to see you, buddy. 268 00:13:39,293 --> 00:13:40,834 He has gotten so big. 269 00:13:40,918 --> 00:13:42,209 Okay! 270 00:13:42,293 --> 00:13:44,501 Oh, my gosh, I'm so sorry. 271 00:13:44,584 --> 00:13:47,418 It's the last one. It's the last one. I promise, okay? 272 00:13:48,084 --> 00:13:49,293 That's enough. 273 00:13:49,376 --> 00:13:52,126 Mind giving our luggage a tuggage? I wanna get that guy situated. 274 00:13:53,459 --> 00:13:54,543 [Jeff sighs] 275 00:13:57,376 --> 00:13:58,501 Wow. 276 00:13:59,376 --> 00:14:00,918 Yeah, we had a great year. 277 00:14:02,126 --> 00:14:04,084 Oh, great arm, buddy! 278 00:14:04,168 --> 00:14:06,709 -Ollie, that is not a toy. -I'll get it. 279 00:14:06,793 --> 00:14:08,126 [speaking Spanish] 280 00:14:09,459 --> 00:14:11,001 We're teaching him Spanish! 281 00:14:11,084 --> 00:14:13,459 What did I tell you about taking other people's stuff? 282 00:14:13,543 --> 00:14:16,876 -Where do you have us set up? -Oh, in the den on the pullout. 283 00:14:16,959 --> 00:14:20,751 [laughs] Okay. In the den on the pullout. Yeah, okay. 284 00:14:42,376 --> 00:14:44,876 Wow, that lady wasn't kidding. 285 00:14:48,209 --> 00:14:49,168 What? 286 00:15:02,209 --> 00:15:05,001 -[doll cries] -What-- Where is it? 287 00:15:06,626 --> 00:15:08,084 [panting] 288 00:15:10,459 --> 00:15:14,626 That brat kid stole my doll. My mom's doll. 289 00:15:16,251 --> 00:15:17,334 [sighs] 290 00:15:18,251 --> 00:15:19,626 How am I gonna find this kid? 291 00:15:20,543 --> 00:15:22,251 Maxwell Johan Mercer. 292 00:15:22,334 --> 00:15:23,793 Carol Ellen Mercer. 293 00:15:24,918 --> 00:15:26,168 Bingo. 294 00:15:39,043 --> 00:15:41,418 [woman through GPS] You have arrived at your destination. 295 00:15:41,501 --> 00:15:43,668 [man] Get in the car! 296 00:15:44,293 --> 00:15:47,834 You need to get in a car now. We are so late. You have no idea. 297 00:15:47,918 --> 00:15:50,043 -[boy] Gotcha! -What was that for? 298 00:15:50,126 --> 00:15:51,543 -[man] I legit might cry right now. -Don't! 299 00:15:51,626 --> 00:15:53,334 I need that for cheerleading, you cretin. 300 00:15:53,418 --> 00:15:54,918 [man] Son of a sandwich! 301 00:15:55,001 --> 00:15:58,251 -Get in the car! -[horn honking] 302 00:15:58,334 --> 00:16:00,626 [distant] We're gonna miss the flight, you guys. Come on! 303 00:16:00,709 --> 00:16:03,001 Uh, hi, my dude. Um... 304 00:16:03,084 --> 00:16:04,668 Is Carol Mercer home? 305 00:16:04,751 --> 00:16:06,751 No, Carol took the early flight. She booked the cars. 306 00:16:06,834 --> 00:16:09,209 That's why they're in her name. These are our cars. We need to go. 307 00:16:09,293 --> 00:16:10,876 Will you be a mensch? 308 00:16:10,959 --> 00:16:12,668 -Put that in the back for us, huh? -Uh… 309 00:16:12,751 --> 00:16:15,501 Bethany, is this a good time for a selfie in front of an Uber? 310 00:16:15,584 --> 00:16:17,793 -#ill-judged. -[sighs] 311 00:16:19,293 --> 00:16:21,251 Text that to me. Okay, guys, get in the car! 312 00:16:21,334 --> 00:16:22,709 Give your stuff to the driver. 313 00:16:22,793 --> 00:16:25,126 -If I miss the duty-free shop… -I'm not the driver. 314 00:16:25,209 --> 00:16:27,334 …I am going to shave somebody's head. That's real. 315 00:16:27,418 --> 00:16:29,668 Blake, you do realize they sell alcohol in Japan? 316 00:16:29,751 --> 00:16:31,251 Hey, big news, Stu. 317 00:16:31,334 --> 00:16:33,584 Duty-free shops sell three-foot Toblerones. 318 00:16:33,668 --> 00:16:36,543 Hey, buddy. I'm gonna give that to you and ask you to take real good care of it. 319 00:16:36,626 --> 00:16:38,543 It's got my sleep apnea machine in there. 320 00:16:38,626 --> 00:16:41,668 Do you know if Carol's son, Max, is home? 321 00:16:42,376 --> 00:16:45,376 If you don't see him, he's halfway to Tokyo by now. All right. 322 00:16:47,293 --> 00:16:49,876 Is that everyone? The cars are leaving now. 323 00:16:53,126 --> 00:16:54,418 [typing] 324 00:16:54,501 --> 00:16:55,584 [phone chimes] 325 00:16:56,126 --> 00:16:57,793 [girl] Everybody, say cheese. 326 00:16:58,501 --> 00:16:59,918 Everybody, wave. 327 00:17:11,959 --> 00:17:14,126 Somebody that lives here, what's the code? 328 00:17:14,209 --> 00:17:16,001 -Your mamma! -Thank you, Ricky! 329 00:17:16,084 --> 00:17:18,293 Guess who's number one to get his head shaved? 330 00:17:19,126 --> 00:17:20,251 It's Ricky! Code! 331 00:17:20,334 --> 00:17:23,459 -One, one, one, two. -One, one, one, two. Brilliant. 332 00:17:23,543 --> 00:17:24,751 That's a bad code. 333 00:17:27,418 --> 00:17:28,418 [electronic voice] Armed. 334 00:17:28,501 --> 00:17:29,668 [groans] 335 00:17:31,751 --> 00:17:33,293 Here we go. All right. 336 00:17:36,501 --> 00:17:38,501 I'm sorry, but I really do need to talk to Carol. 337 00:17:38,584 --> 00:17:42,584 Yes. Don't worry. I'll make sure that Carol gives you five stars in the app. 338 00:17:42,668 --> 00:17:44,001 Reputation is everything. 339 00:17:45,501 --> 00:17:48,584 Oh, hey, wait! Wait! 340 00:17:50,543 --> 00:17:51,626 [groans] 341 00:17:55,751 --> 00:17:57,626 What the heck are you looking at? 342 00:17:59,668 --> 00:18:00,876 [grunts] 343 00:18:04,376 --> 00:18:06,834 I'm sorry. I'm having a bad day. 344 00:18:15,626 --> 00:18:16,668 There it is. 345 00:18:19,293 --> 00:18:21,168 Oh, my… 346 00:18:24,918 --> 00:18:26,793 One, one, one, two. 347 00:18:34,209 --> 00:18:35,793 [heart thumping] 348 00:18:40,293 --> 00:18:41,543 [siren blares] 349 00:18:48,668 --> 00:18:51,793 -[radio: "Mele Kalikimaka" playing] -[horn honks] 350 00:18:57,418 --> 00:18:58,918 Okay, it's just a dog. 351 00:18:59,001 --> 00:19:01,418 I'm being ridiculous. I've gone insane. 352 00:19:01,501 --> 00:19:04,001 I'm a good, normal man. I'm gonna talk to Pam. 353 00:19:04,709 --> 00:19:05,709 Pam. 354 00:19:05,793 --> 00:19:07,418 I'm just a neighbor helping. 355 00:19:07,501 --> 00:19:09,668 I water their dogs-- plants. 356 00:19:09,751 --> 00:19:13,334 I'm a friend of Carol's. A friend of-- Carol Ellen Mercer is her name. 357 00:19:13,418 --> 00:19:14,418 I gotta call Pam. 358 00:19:17,834 --> 00:19:19,001 [chattering] 359 00:19:22,334 --> 00:19:23,668 Where is he? 360 00:19:23,751 --> 00:19:25,126 I'm not sure where he is. 361 00:19:33,293 --> 00:19:34,418 Oh, great. 362 00:19:35,584 --> 00:19:36,751 I'm sorry. Sorry. 363 00:19:37,626 --> 00:19:38,751 [Hunter] Oh. 364 00:19:38,834 --> 00:19:41,084 -Here we go. Sorry. Hi. -Is everything okay? 365 00:19:41,168 --> 00:19:43,334 -Yeah, fine. Thank you. -What are you wearing? 366 00:19:43,418 --> 00:19:45,418 -I didn't have time to change. -You look ridiculous. 367 00:19:45,501 --> 00:19:48,084 -Thank you. -[conductor] Season's greetings, seniors. 368 00:19:48,168 --> 00:19:51,001 I apologize for the delay, but we all saw the reason why. 369 00:19:51,084 --> 00:19:54,793 My D-flat has decided that the world runs on his time. 370 00:19:55,668 --> 00:19:59,084 Without further ado, I give you the Ne'er-Do-Bells. 371 00:19:59,168 --> 00:20:00,793 Hands on bells. 372 00:20:02,043 --> 00:20:04,126 -Raise the bells. -[bells ring lightly] 373 00:20:04,959 --> 00:20:06,668 Two, three, four. 374 00:20:06,751 --> 00:20:09,376 [bells ring] 375 00:20:09,459 --> 00:20:11,084 [singing "Rudolph The Red-Nosed Reindeer"] 376 00:20:11,168 --> 00:20:12,793 -So did you get my voice mail? -Yes. 377 00:20:12,876 --> 00:20:14,918 All of this happened in the last two hours? 378 00:20:15,001 --> 00:20:17,459 Yeah, the doll is in that house. I saw it in his jacket. 379 00:20:17,543 --> 00:20:19,959 -Why didn't you tell me this? -I thought I would handle it myself. 380 00:20:20,043 --> 00:20:22,418 And your way of handling it was breaking and entering? 381 00:20:22,501 --> 00:20:23,793 Just entering. I had the key. 382 00:20:23,876 --> 00:20:26,501 -It's still against the law, Jeff. -[shouting] Like a lightbulb. 383 00:20:26,584 --> 00:20:28,334 Oh, my gosh. This is so terrible. 384 00:20:28,418 --> 00:20:30,418 [carolers] ♪ All of the other reindeer ♪ 385 00:20:30,501 --> 00:20:32,084 But that's why I didn't do it, Columbo. 386 00:20:32,168 --> 00:20:33,251 Well, good. 387 00:20:33,334 --> 00:20:35,251 -Like Pinocchio. -Pinocchio. 388 00:20:35,334 --> 00:20:36,959 What are we gonna do now? We need that doll. 389 00:20:37,043 --> 00:20:39,084 I know we do, okay? Just let me think. 390 00:20:39,168 --> 00:20:42,459 ♪ Join in any reindeer games ♪ 391 00:20:42,543 --> 00:20:44,084 -[stammers] Uh, like Monopoly! -Yeah. 392 00:20:44,168 --> 00:20:45,543 -That's too late. -Yeah. 393 00:20:45,626 --> 00:20:47,584 -Boo. Sounds like garbage. -[singing resumes] 394 00:20:47,668 --> 00:20:49,709 -Herman, no. None of that. -Well, it does. 395 00:20:50,626 --> 00:20:51,793 You stink. 396 00:20:51,876 --> 00:20:53,501 ♪ Santa came to say ♪ 397 00:20:53,584 --> 00:20:54,834 Here's what we're gonna do. 398 00:20:54,918 --> 00:20:57,251 We will wait until they come back from vacation, 399 00:20:57,334 --> 00:21:00,501 and then I will go over there. I will tell the mom everything, 400 00:21:00,584 --> 00:21:02,084 and we'll get the doll back. 401 00:21:02,668 --> 00:21:03,918 [whispers] Get it together. 402 00:21:04,001 --> 00:21:05,626 Are you sure we should wait? 403 00:21:05,709 --> 00:21:09,001 Yes, Jeff. I don't want my husband spending Christmas in jail. 404 00:21:09,084 --> 00:21:10,168 -[clears throat] Yippee! -Hey! 405 00:21:10,251 --> 00:21:11,751 Wow. 406 00:21:11,834 --> 00:21:14,209 But the-- Our future is in that house, Pam. 407 00:21:14,293 --> 00:21:17,584 Come on. What could happen to it in an empty house? 408 00:21:17,668 --> 00:21:21,793 -[singing ends] -[bell rings continuously] 409 00:21:21,876 --> 00:21:22,959 It's okay, Martha. 410 00:21:24,209 --> 00:21:26,418 Don't blame her. That's you. 411 00:21:26,501 --> 00:21:27,626 Sorry. 412 00:21:27,709 --> 00:21:30,959 -Shame on you. This is my life choice. -[bell rings lightly] 413 00:21:34,126 --> 00:21:35,251 [groans] 414 00:21:43,251 --> 00:21:45,626 [Max] Hello? 415 00:21:46,834 --> 00:21:47,918 Mum? 416 00:21:50,293 --> 00:21:51,376 Dad? 417 00:21:53,709 --> 00:21:54,834 Uncle Blake? 418 00:21:56,168 --> 00:21:57,501 Uncle Stu? 419 00:22:09,959 --> 00:22:12,043 It's a Christmas miracle. 420 00:22:13,793 --> 00:22:14,876 [chuckles] 421 00:22:18,334 --> 00:22:21,543 -[game character screams] -[groans] Oh, come on, mate! 422 00:22:26,668 --> 00:22:28,293 ["Christmas All Over Again" playing] 423 00:22:28,376 --> 00:22:30,751 ♪ Well it's Christmas time ♪ 424 00:22:30,834 --> 00:22:31,834 [laughs] 425 00:22:31,918 --> 00:22:33,168 ♪ Again ♪ 426 00:22:34,043 --> 00:22:35,043 Ugh. 427 00:22:35,126 --> 00:22:38,668 ♪ Decorations are all hung by the fire ♪ 428 00:22:38,751 --> 00:22:39,834 Oh! 429 00:22:40,626 --> 00:22:44,418 All right, Internet. Show me your worst. 430 00:22:44,501 --> 00:22:45,959 [monitor beeps] 431 00:22:46,501 --> 00:22:47,918 Well played, Mum and Dad. 432 00:22:48,001 --> 00:22:49,043 ♪ Ringing out ♪ 433 00:22:49,126 --> 00:22:52,626 ♪ And it's Christmas ♪ 434 00:22:52,709 --> 00:22:57,418 ♪ All over again ♪ 435 00:22:59,168 --> 00:23:01,209 ♪ Yeah again ♪ 436 00:23:04,209 --> 00:23:06,626 ♪ And all over town ♪ 437 00:23:07,376 --> 00:23:09,834 ♪ Little kids gonna get down ♪ 438 00:23:09,918 --> 00:23:10,918 [moans] 439 00:23:11,626 --> 00:23:14,543 [screaming] 440 00:23:17,001 --> 00:23:18,168 ♪ Hey ♪ 441 00:23:24,834 --> 00:23:27,126 ♪ Everybody's singing ♪ 442 00:23:28,334 --> 00:23:30,668 ♪ All the bells are ringing out ♪ 443 00:23:30,751 --> 00:23:33,168 [screams] 444 00:23:34,334 --> 00:23:37,168 ♪ All over ♪ 445 00:23:37,251 --> 00:23:38,418 [moans] 446 00:23:38,501 --> 00:23:40,168 ♪ Again ♪ 447 00:23:40,251 --> 00:23:41,501 [people chatter] 448 00:23:41,584 --> 00:23:45,168 [Jeff] Pam, that doll is worth $238,000, 449 00:23:45,251 --> 00:23:49,084 and is it really a crime to steal something that was stolen from you? 450 00:23:49,168 --> 00:23:52,959 Yes, that's what O.J. got in trouble for. The second time. 451 00:23:53,043 --> 00:23:55,793 -Okay, I just think-- -Look, I know that you wanna save the day 452 00:23:55,876 --> 00:23:58,084 because you feel bad about losing your job. 453 00:23:58,168 --> 00:23:59,668 What's wrong with that? 454 00:23:59,751 --> 00:24:02,668 The fact that you will feel a lot worse telling your kids you're… 455 00:24:03,668 --> 00:24:05,668 [whispers] in jail for committing a felony. 456 00:24:05,751 --> 00:24:08,418 No, it's a misdemeanor. Yeah, I looked it up. 457 00:24:08,501 --> 00:24:11,251 That is evidence. Do you know how to clear your search history? 458 00:24:11,334 --> 00:24:13,626 [chuckles] Yeah. I mean, well, I probably-- 459 00:24:13,709 --> 00:24:15,543 -I-I'm sure I could figure it out. -Okay, listen. 460 00:24:15,626 --> 00:24:18,501 We made a plan. Let's just stick to it, okay? 461 00:24:18,584 --> 00:24:20,209 -[girl] Mom, Dad, look at us. -[Hunter] Hey! 462 00:24:20,293 --> 00:24:22,084 -Hey! -You like 'em? Look at Ollie. 463 00:24:22,168 --> 00:24:23,209 He's a little elf. 464 00:24:23,293 --> 00:24:26,043 He's so smart. We handed 'em to him. He put 'em right on. 465 00:24:26,126 --> 00:24:27,293 Oh, amazing. 466 00:24:27,376 --> 00:24:30,418 Um, could I get some, uh, reindeer antlers for Pam 467 00:24:31,001 --> 00:24:33,584 and a pair of the little elf glasses for my brother? 468 00:24:33,668 --> 00:24:35,751 [train whistles, sings] 469 00:24:37,751 --> 00:24:39,834 -Ollie, we need big smiles from you, okay? -Look at Mommy. 470 00:24:39,918 --> 00:24:41,876 -[cries] -[Hunter] Big smiles, Ollie. Big smiles. 471 00:24:41,959 --> 00:24:44,084 Little guy comes alive in front of the camera. 472 00:24:44,168 --> 00:24:45,251 [Ollie wails] 473 00:24:45,334 --> 00:24:48,084 Um, okay, cute photo much? 474 00:24:48,168 --> 00:24:50,251 [chuckles] I mean, come on. Look at that. 475 00:24:50,334 --> 00:24:52,918 Look at what's happened there. It's an adorable image. 476 00:24:53,001 --> 00:24:55,376 -It's cute. It's super cute. -[crying continues] 477 00:24:55,459 --> 00:24:56,959 It's a special memory. 478 00:24:57,043 --> 00:24:59,418 And since we are paper-free at the North Pole, 479 00:24:59,501 --> 00:25:00,876 you can actually use this code 480 00:25:00,959 --> 00:25:03,418 to download that special memory right from the cloud. 481 00:25:03,501 --> 00:25:07,709 Wh-- So, you're not even using solid-state storage on-site? 482 00:25:07,793 --> 00:25:10,876 -I don't know what that means. -[Jeff] I'll tell you what it means. 483 00:25:10,959 --> 00:25:13,709 What it means is, you're entirely at the whim of a hosted service provider 484 00:25:13,793 --> 00:25:15,293 for virtualization and backup. 485 00:25:15,376 --> 00:25:16,751 Sir, I'm not a woman in tech. 486 00:25:16,834 --> 00:25:19,126 -I'm a woman in memories. -You know, it's not a video game. 487 00:25:19,209 --> 00:25:20,501 -She doesn't care. -I don't understand 488 00:25:20,584 --> 00:25:22,876 why you'd be so cavalier with something this important. 489 00:25:22,959 --> 00:25:24,001 [girl] What is this? 490 00:25:25,084 --> 00:25:28,168 [Mei] New fashion, honey. We gotta-- We gotta switch up these colors. 491 00:25:28,251 --> 00:25:32,043 -[gasps] Mom, look at how cute this is. -So cute. 492 00:25:32,126 --> 00:25:34,334 -[chuckles] Can I get it? -Oh. 493 00:25:35,293 --> 00:25:37,543 Oh, honey, no. I'm sorry, that's way too much. 494 00:25:37,626 --> 00:25:40,876 Okay, no, no, no. I can't stand the thought of you not having that. 495 00:25:40,959 --> 00:25:43,918 Consider it an early Christmas present from Auntie Mei-Mei. 496 00:25:44,001 --> 00:25:45,501 You're gonna look so hot. Come on. 497 00:25:45,584 --> 00:25:47,918 -Mei. -[girl giggling] Are you kidding? 498 00:25:48,418 --> 00:25:49,418 [phone beeps] 499 00:25:49,501 --> 00:25:50,709 [Mei] This, please. 500 00:25:53,501 --> 00:25:54,668 [Mei] A top for you. 501 00:25:59,168 --> 00:26:02,959 [man on TV] I'll tell you what I am gonna give you, Snakes. 502 00:26:03,043 --> 00:26:06,626 I'm gonna give you 'til the count of ten 503 00:26:07,418 --> 00:26:11,709 to get your ugly, yellow, no-good keister… 504 00:26:11,793 --> 00:26:13,959 -Ugh, this is garbage. -…off my spaceship… 505 00:26:14,043 --> 00:26:16,918 I don't know why they're always trying to remake the classics. 506 00:26:17,001 --> 00:26:18,668 Never as good as the originals. 507 00:26:18,751 --> 00:26:20,209 You want some more P-corn, C-Train? 508 00:26:20,293 --> 00:26:21,793 -Oh, yeah, that'd be great. -All right. 509 00:26:23,209 --> 00:26:26,084 -[man on TV] One, two… -I don't remember this guy. 510 00:26:27,126 --> 00:26:28,959 Whoa! Ho, ho! 511 00:26:29,043 --> 00:26:32,084 Nearly lost your house there, Pama-lama-ding-dong. 512 00:26:42,126 --> 00:26:44,168 ["Somewhere In My Memory" playing] 513 00:26:51,834 --> 00:26:53,126 [Jeff] Hey, honey. 514 00:26:53,209 --> 00:26:55,376 -Put the topper on. -Should we put it on together? 515 00:26:55,459 --> 00:26:57,918 -Yeah. -One, two, three. [gasps] 516 00:26:58,001 --> 00:26:59,751 [girl] Santa came! Santa came! 517 00:26:59,834 --> 00:27:02,459 [boy] Santa came! Santa came! Santa came! 518 00:27:02,543 --> 00:27:03,918 I'm so excited. 519 00:27:04,001 --> 00:27:05,793 Santa came! 520 00:27:05,876 --> 00:27:07,209 -Oh, my God! -Santa came. 521 00:27:07,293 --> 00:27:08,626 -Come here. -Oh, my God! 522 00:27:12,709 --> 00:27:14,293 Home sweet home. 523 00:27:16,418 --> 00:27:18,418 Mom, you gotta save our house. 524 00:27:18,501 --> 00:27:20,418 Seriously, Mom, will you just get the doll? 525 00:27:20,501 --> 00:27:22,543 It's just entering, Pam. We have the key. 526 00:27:22,626 --> 00:27:24,459 Pam, you have to call me. 527 00:27:24,543 --> 00:27:26,043 -Hi, Gavin… -Come and get me. 528 00:27:26,126 --> 00:27:28,334 Now, Fräulein. Now! 529 00:27:29,793 --> 00:27:32,084 I will, you ugly, little boy! 530 00:27:32,168 --> 00:27:35,126 [man on TV] Keep the change, ya filthy earthling. 531 00:27:35,209 --> 00:27:37,293 Well, I think you're very handsome. 532 00:27:39,876 --> 00:27:41,084 Let's go. 533 00:27:41,168 --> 00:27:42,876 -Where are we going? -To get some milk. 534 00:27:42,959 --> 00:27:45,126 Oh, well, there's plenty of milk in the fridge, Pammy. 535 00:27:45,209 --> 00:27:48,334 No, you guys have a ton of milk. You're all set on milk. 536 00:27:48,418 --> 00:27:50,709 Uh, eggnog. We need-- We're gonna get some eggnog. 537 00:27:50,793 --> 00:27:53,418 -You've seen the weather, right? -[Mei] It's snowmageddon out there. 538 00:27:53,501 --> 00:27:55,543 Yeah, snowpocalypse, babe. Snowpocalypse is better. 539 00:27:55,626 --> 00:28:00,043 -Are you gonna be okay to drive? -Yes, yes, yes, yes. 540 00:28:01,209 --> 00:28:03,209 Yes. We are okay to drive. 541 00:28:03,293 --> 00:28:05,001 [wind howling] 542 00:28:06,543 --> 00:28:08,293 [Pam] Honey, your instincts were right. 543 00:28:08,376 --> 00:28:11,834 We can't leave a winning lottery ticket in some stranger's house. 544 00:28:11,918 --> 00:28:15,168 Yeah, yeah. We are doing this. 545 00:28:15,251 --> 00:28:17,209 Oh, honey, that's Beechtree. 546 00:28:17,293 --> 00:28:18,376 [tires screeching] 547 00:28:18,459 --> 00:28:21,501 [both yelling] 548 00:28:21,584 --> 00:28:23,126 [both yell] 549 00:28:23,209 --> 00:28:26,959 Honey, steer into the slide. 550 00:28:27,043 --> 00:28:29,626 N-No, y-you steer into a skid. 551 00:28:37,251 --> 00:28:40,918 Pam, I watched an episode of Locked Up earlier today on demand, 552 00:28:41,001 --> 00:28:42,001 and… 553 00:28:42,876 --> 00:28:44,668 I can't go to jail, honey. 554 00:28:44,751 --> 00:28:47,293 I wouldn't last 30 seconds in gen pop. 555 00:28:48,084 --> 00:28:49,293 Gen pop? 556 00:28:49,876 --> 00:28:51,084 General population. 557 00:28:51,668 --> 00:28:53,459 It's where fresh fish get got. 558 00:28:56,418 --> 00:28:57,418 Jeff. 559 00:28:58,959 --> 00:29:01,043 I need you to focus. 560 00:29:01,126 --> 00:29:04,709 Nobody here is getting got. 561 00:29:04,793 --> 00:29:09,376 The only thing getting got is that doll. 562 00:29:09,459 --> 00:29:12,876 So let's go get it! 563 00:29:14,959 --> 00:29:16,001 [door bangs] 564 00:29:17,126 --> 00:29:18,668 -Can you unlock the door? -Yeah. 565 00:29:18,751 --> 00:29:20,251 -[lock clicks] -Sorry. 566 00:29:20,959 --> 00:29:22,168 [door closes] 567 00:29:27,626 --> 00:29:28,668 [Pam exhales] 568 00:29:30,043 --> 00:29:31,209 Don't move. 569 00:29:34,459 --> 00:29:35,751 Why are we standing still? 570 00:29:35,834 --> 00:29:39,918 Because the light is motion-activated, and if we stand still, it'll turn off. 571 00:29:40,001 --> 00:29:43,668 Yeah, but it's just gonna turn back on when we move again. 572 00:29:43,751 --> 00:29:46,043 So, why are we standing still now? 573 00:29:46,126 --> 00:29:48,293 I don't know. I'm not good at this. 574 00:29:48,376 --> 00:29:49,376 I know. 575 00:29:51,126 --> 00:29:52,668 [Jeff groans] 576 00:29:53,293 --> 00:29:55,084 [Jeff grunts, inhales shakily] 577 00:30:02,043 --> 00:30:03,418 [machine beeps] 578 00:30:04,126 --> 00:30:05,168 And we're criminals. 579 00:30:05,251 --> 00:30:07,376 -[Pam] Go. -[Alarm rings, buzzes] 580 00:30:07,459 --> 00:30:08,793 [electronic voice] Alarm. 581 00:30:09,543 --> 00:30:10,668 It's loud. 582 00:30:10,751 --> 00:30:12,584 [alarm beeping, buzzing continues] 583 00:30:12,668 --> 00:30:13,668 [electronic voice] Alarm. 584 00:30:13,751 --> 00:30:15,959 [Jeff] Two, two, two, one. 585 00:30:16,043 --> 00:30:17,501 Be careful. Don't slip. 586 00:30:17,584 --> 00:30:19,293 -[Jeff whispers] Okay. -[beeps] 587 00:30:20,918 --> 00:30:22,959 [Pam] They did leave in a hurry. 588 00:30:23,043 --> 00:30:24,501 [beeps] 589 00:30:24,584 --> 00:30:26,626 -Where'd you see the kid's jacket? -It was right here. 590 00:30:27,293 --> 00:30:29,126 Well, we tried. 591 00:30:29,209 --> 00:30:32,001 A jacket can't just get up and walk away. It has to be here somewhere. 592 00:30:32,084 --> 00:30:34,543 Hey, don't bail on me. 593 00:30:35,376 --> 00:30:36,959 We're a team. 594 00:30:37,043 --> 00:30:38,084 O-Okay. 595 00:30:38,876 --> 00:30:41,834 Him? I knew he was weird. 596 00:30:41,918 --> 00:30:45,626 All we have to do is find that ugly, little boy. 597 00:30:45,709 --> 00:30:50,626 And then some crazy, old lady will pay us $200,000 for him. 598 00:30:50,709 --> 00:30:53,668 Two-hundred grand just to put him in a room, 599 00:30:53,751 --> 00:30:57,418 clean him off with her little brushes, and show him off to all her friends. 600 00:30:57,501 --> 00:31:04,209 [laughs] May I feed him a piece of this gross, old lady candy? 601 00:31:04,293 --> 00:31:06,168 Of course. That's all he eats. 602 00:31:06,251 --> 00:31:07,584 [groans] 603 00:31:07,668 --> 00:31:09,043 -[laughing] -[retches] 604 00:31:09,126 --> 00:31:10,793 Oh, Gertrude. He's perfect. 605 00:31:10,876 --> 00:31:12,709 Worth every penny. 606 00:31:13,334 --> 00:31:15,168 -[Max retches] -[grunts, laughs] 607 00:31:15,251 --> 00:31:18,126 [laughing] 608 00:31:18,209 --> 00:31:21,126 [whimpers] 609 00:31:23,334 --> 00:31:26,293 Five grand for an ugly, porcelain kid. 610 00:31:26,376 --> 00:31:29,751 I didn't get half that for my real kids. 611 00:31:31,043 --> 00:31:33,418 We're not leaving here without him. 612 00:31:33,501 --> 00:31:35,001 I don't think so. 613 00:31:37,459 --> 00:31:38,626 [floorboards creaking] 614 00:31:40,668 --> 00:31:41,668 The jacket. 615 00:31:42,918 --> 00:31:45,418 -Homebot, call the police. -[Homebot beeps] 616 00:31:45,501 --> 00:31:49,001 [Homebot speaking German] 617 00:31:49,084 --> 00:31:50,334 There's someone home. 618 00:31:50,418 --> 00:31:52,834 [Homebot speaking German] 619 00:31:52,918 --> 00:31:54,543 And she's German. 620 00:31:54,626 --> 00:31:57,501 [Homebot speaking German] 621 00:31:57,584 --> 00:31:58,918 [Jeff repeats German] 622 00:31:59,001 --> 00:32:01,793 Okay, on three, we run. One. 623 00:32:06,709 --> 00:32:07,751 [grunts] 624 00:32:08,251 --> 00:32:09,418 -Ow, ow. -[siren wails] 625 00:32:11,626 --> 00:32:13,126 Whoa, that was fast. 626 00:32:13,209 --> 00:32:16,209 -[siren wailing continues] -[Homebot speaking German] 627 00:32:20,209 --> 00:32:23,793 [radio chatter] 628 00:32:30,168 --> 00:32:31,501 Evening. 629 00:32:31,584 --> 00:32:32,584 Hi. 630 00:32:36,084 --> 00:32:37,334 Hello, Officer. 631 00:32:38,001 --> 00:32:40,209 [scoffs] Did somebody slip and fall? [chuckles] 632 00:32:41,459 --> 00:32:43,459 Ha! Busted. 633 00:32:43,543 --> 00:32:45,126 Is this your residence? 634 00:32:45,209 --> 00:32:47,126 Well, I certainly hope so. 635 00:32:47,209 --> 00:32:51,834 Otherwise, I've been cleaning somebody else's sinks for the past 14 years. 636 00:32:51,918 --> 00:32:53,043 [chuckles] 637 00:32:53,126 --> 00:32:54,376 [chuckles] Sinks. 638 00:32:54,459 --> 00:32:56,168 Is there a problem, Officer? 639 00:32:56,251 --> 00:32:58,334 Honey, why don't you go warm up the car? 640 00:33:00,001 --> 00:33:03,459 We got a call. Your home alarm's been triggered. 641 00:33:04,084 --> 00:33:07,293 Yeah, well, the code is our anniversary, so… 642 00:33:08,043 --> 00:33:10,668 you think he's gonna remember that? [chuckles] 643 00:33:11,501 --> 00:33:14,918 I'm sure you never forget your anniversary, do you, Officer? 644 00:33:15,001 --> 00:33:17,918 -Oh, no, no. [chuckles] -[car door closes] 645 00:33:18,918 --> 00:33:20,834 -No ring on this finger, ma'am. -[engine starts] 646 00:33:20,918 --> 00:33:23,251 No one's been able to tame this wild stallion. 647 00:33:23,334 --> 00:33:24,418 [sniffs] 648 00:33:24,501 --> 00:33:28,126 Well, I envy the filly who eventually ropes you in. 649 00:33:29,543 --> 00:33:31,376 Another time, another place. 650 00:33:33,043 --> 00:33:35,918 A whole lot of what-ifs, Officer. 651 00:33:36,001 --> 00:33:39,876 [chuckles] Anyway, I'm so sorry we wasted your time. 652 00:33:41,418 --> 00:33:43,918 Is there anything else I can help you with tonight? 653 00:33:44,668 --> 00:33:46,168 No, don't worry 'bout it. No. 654 00:33:47,168 --> 00:33:50,668 Unless you want me to arrest your husband for missing your anniversary, huh? 655 00:33:50,751 --> 00:33:52,043 [both laugh] 656 00:33:52,126 --> 00:33:55,876 Is it bad if a part of me says, "Yeah, I do want that"? 657 00:33:55,959 --> 00:33:58,251 [both laughing] 658 00:33:58,334 --> 00:33:59,626 What's so funny? 659 00:33:59,709 --> 00:34:01,376 -[Pam laughs] -Get it? 660 00:34:02,543 --> 00:34:04,876 What are you waiting for? Detain them. 661 00:34:04,959 --> 00:34:06,543 -Now-- -[Max, faintly] Detain them! 662 00:34:07,793 --> 00:34:08,834 What was that? 663 00:34:16,793 --> 00:34:18,793 Nah, nah, we're all good. 664 00:34:20,418 --> 00:34:24,459 What say you and your hubby have a nice holiday. 665 00:34:25,501 --> 00:34:26,543 And a good night. 666 00:34:26,626 --> 00:34:28,876 -Wait, you're letting them get away. -[sirens wailing] 667 00:34:30,043 --> 00:34:32,543 And-- And then those people broke into my house, 668 00:34:32,626 --> 00:34:34,001 -and I-I-I-- -Whoa, whoa. 669 00:34:34,084 --> 00:34:37,418 -…think they're trying to kidnap me or-- -Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. 670 00:34:37,501 --> 00:34:41,834 Are you saying your parents left you home alone? 671 00:34:41,918 --> 00:34:44,834 -Alone? Alone? Alone? -[bars sliding] 672 00:34:46,084 --> 00:34:48,709 [pants] 673 00:34:48,793 --> 00:34:51,251 [whispers] Why did you have to tell anyone, Max? 674 00:34:51,334 --> 00:34:54,668 Why did you have to open your big mouth? 675 00:34:54,751 --> 00:34:56,626 [pants] 676 00:34:56,709 --> 00:34:58,459 [cries] 677 00:34:59,543 --> 00:35:01,626 Maybe the police is a bad idea. 678 00:35:06,334 --> 00:35:07,334 Nice couple. 679 00:35:08,751 --> 00:35:09,918 [Max] You know what? 680 00:35:10,709 --> 00:35:14,959 This whole house-to-myself thing might not have been the best idea, Homebot. 681 00:35:15,043 --> 00:35:16,793 [Homebot beeps, speaks in German] 682 00:35:17,376 --> 00:35:19,751 [groans] How do you switch back to English? 683 00:35:19,834 --> 00:35:21,668 Changing language to English. 684 00:35:21,751 --> 00:35:23,501 Oh, that was easy. 685 00:35:24,084 --> 00:35:27,043 Homebot, call Mum. 686 00:35:27,126 --> 00:35:31,668 I'm sorry. Voice calling is not available on this Homebot device. 687 00:35:31,751 --> 00:35:33,376 [Max] So what do I do, Homebot? 688 00:35:33,459 --> 00:35:36,543 I can't call my mum, and if I tell the police or anyone else, 689 00:35:36,626 --> 00:35:38,543 they'll put my parents in jail. 690 00:35:38,626 --> 00:35:43,084 A blue whale's veins are big enough for an adult human to swim through. 691 00:35:43,168 --> 00:35:45,543 How is that supposed to help? 692 00:35:45,626 --> 00:35:47,959 What time is it in Tokyo? 693 00:35:48,043 --> 00:35:52,959 It is 11:37 a.m. tomorrow in Tokyo, Japan. 694 00:35:53,626 --> 00:35:54,793 Night, Homebot. 695 00:35:55,626 --> 00:35:56,876 [Homebot] Good night, Max. 696 00:35:58,209 --> 00:35:59,834 [Carol shouting] What? 697 00:35:59,918 --> 00:36:02,084 Wha-- Are you-- Are you serious? 698 00:36:02,168 --> 00:36:04,084 So at no point you thought to check with me? 699 00:36:04,168 --> 00:36:06,418 You just assumed that Max was on the other flight? 700 00:36:06,501 --> 00:36:08,668 We didn't take a census. I-- 701 00:36:08,751 --> 00:36:11,918 Stu, did you assume he was on the plane? 702 00:36:12,001 --> 00:36:15,251 [Stu] Carol, I swear to you. That boy was not in the house when we left. 703 00:36:15,334 --> 00:36:17,501 And where do you think he was, Stu? 704 00:36:17,584 --> 00:36:20,251 At the-- At the Four freaking Seasons? 705 00:36:20,334 --> 00:36:21,709 He had fish curry on the plane. 706 00:36:21,793 --> 00:36:24,043 We probably got a hard 30 before we're gonna see Stu. 707 00:36:24,126 --> 00:36:26,584 You do realize that, because of you, I'm in Japan, 708 00:36:26,668 --> 00:36:30,876 and my ten-- ten-year-old son is at home by himself? 709 00:36:30,959 --> 00:36:33,876 Yeah, but-- but first-world problems, you know? [chuckles] 710 00:36:33,959 --> 00:36:36,709 -First-world problems? -Stop it. Listen, listen, stop it! 711 00:36:36,793 --> 00:36:37,959 I got that at Brookstone. 712 00:36:38,918 --> 00:36:40,043 Dad's five minutes away. 713 00:36:40,126 --> 00:36:42,959 He's at the travel desk and could only get one ticket home. 714 00:36:43,043 --> 00:36:45,584 -Yes, hello. Beechtree Lane. -[gasps] 715 00:36:45,668 --> 00:36:46,959 -With two-- -Beech with two E's. 716 00:36:47,043 --> 00:36:48,501 Can you send an officer right away? 717 00:36:48,584 --> 00:36:50,334 [Stu] Did somebody call the house? 718 00:36:50,418 --> 00:36:53,709 No, because we don't have a landline. Nobody has a landline anymore. 719 00:36:53,793 --> 00:36:57,376 Yes, Stu, nobody has a landline anymore because it's not 1993. 720 00:36:57,459 --> 00:37:02,126 What's your next idea? Should I beep him after I listen to the new MC Hammer joint? 721 00:37:02,209 --> 00:37:04,209 What about the neighbors? Call one of the neighbors. 722 00:37:04,293 --> 00:37:07,084 -Activate the prayer chain. -We don't know the neighbors, Blake. 723 00:37:07,168 --> 00:37:10,293 We only moved there two months ago. I don't think we even know their names. 724 00:37:10,376 --> 00:37:13,043 Everybody we know is back in London. 725 00:37:13,126 --> 00:37:14,543 Well, Mum, where are you going? 726 00:37:14,626 --> 00:37:18,668 I'm going to go to the airport, darling, because I can't sit here while my son is-- 727 00:37:18,751 --> 00:37:20,668 I mean-- God, where is my passport? 728 00:37:20,751 --> 00:37:23,418 -It's in your hand. -It's in my hand. It's in my hand. 729 00:37:23,501 --> 00:37:27,168 See, Carol? Under stress, people make mistakes that we should forgive. 730 00:37:27,251 --> 00:37:29,834 You know? People forget passports. People forget-- 731 00:37:29,918 --> 00:37:31,834 -[yells] No! -Stop it. 732 00:37:31,918 --> 00:37:35,001 Oh, darling, happy Christmas. Mummy loves you very much. Okay? 733 00:37:35,084 --> 00:37:36,959 [Stu] Uh, what's happening? Did Carol leave? 734 00:37:37,043 --> 00:37:38,168 Travel safe. 735 00:37:38,251 --> 00:37:39,584 [Stu] What-- What's going on? 736 00:37:44,418 --> 00:37:45,543 [laughs] 737 00:37:45,626 --> 00:37:46,793 -[man grunts] -[laughs] 738 00:37:46,876 --> 00:37:49,626 [male dispatcher] Car 18, car 18. You near Lincoln Heights? 739 00:37:49,709 --> 00:37:52,543 We got a call about a minor, one Maxwell Mercer. 740 00:37:52,626 --> 00:37:55,584 Parents are on vacation and think he might have been left behind. 741 00:37:55,668 --> 00:37:58,584 -Address is 36 Beechtree Lane. -Oh, you gotta be kidding me. 742 00:37:59,459 --> 00:38:00,959 [clears throat] Um… 743 00:38:01,959 --> 00:38:05,793 You can ignore that. That is a prank call. Over. 744 00:38:05,876 --> 00:38:07,543 -[male dispatcher] Prank call? -Yep. 745 00:38:08,501 --> 00:38:12,751 Listen, when I was a kid, my family went on vacation. 746 00:38:13,376 --> 00:38:16,001 We forgot my little brother Kevin. 747 00:38:17,584 --> 00:38:18,626 Twice. 748 00:38:20,251 --> 00:38:24,418 He called in the 289 to mess with me. The idiot does it every year. 749 00:38:25,251 --> 00:38:27,126 [male dispatcher] Are, uh, you sure about that? 750 00:38:27,209 --> 00:38:28,626 Yes, I'm sure about that! 751 00:38:28,709 --> 00:38:34,376 I know for a fact that there is no forgotten child at that address. 752 00:38:34,459 --> 00:38:38,126 I was just there for a bogus home-alarm call, okay? 753 00:38:39,168 --> 00:38:43,959 Guess what? The place had a McCallister Home Alarm system. 754 00:38:44,043 --> 00:38:48,834 Oh, gee, a coincidence? I don't think so. 755 00:38:50,001 --> 00:38:55,334 [male dispatcher] Yeah. So can you just drive by and check it out? 756 00:38:59,126 --> 00:39:01,501 [Officer McCallister] Ten-four. I'm on my way now. 757 00:39:08,334 --> 00:39:12,501 Nice try, Kevin. Nice try. 758 00:39:13,418 --> 00:39:14,793 Trout sniffer. 759 00:39:24,793 --> 00:39:26,834 [chattering] 760 00:39:26,918 --> 00:39:28,043 Hey, guys. 761 00:39:29,084 --> 00:39:31,668 Hey. We saved you some seats 'cause you were running late. 762 00:39:31,751 --> 00:39:33,584 -People are still coming in. -[Jeff] Hi. 763 00:39:33,668 --> 00:39:36,334 Hey, we saved you a seat 'cause you were running late to church. 764 00:39:36,418 --> 00:39:37,418 Yep. Thanks. 765 00:39:37,501 --> 00:39:39,251 I've got an app that will ping your assistant, 766 00:39:39,334 --> 00:39:41,376 let you know when you're running late. I'll send it to you. 767 00:39:41,459 --> 00:39:43,001 -Great. -Okay. Thank you. 768 00:39:45,334 --> 00:39:48,001 Hey, so that dress is really… 769 00:39:49,251 --> 00:39:50,251 Hmm? 770 00:39:50,334 --> 00:39:52,459 -Her shoulder is so bare. -You see the full-- 771 00:39:52,543 --> 00:39:53,959 -You see her full shoulder. -Yeah. 772 00:39:54,043 --> 00:39:57,293 -They grow up so fast, don't they? -Oh, Gavin. What are you doing here? 773 00:39:57,376 --> 00:39:59,793 Well, it's Christmas Eve. It's the day that everybody goes to church. 774 00:39:59,876 --> 00:40:00,876 -Am I right? -Yeah. 775 00:40:00,959 --> 00:40:04,043 Peace be unto you. Peace be unto you. Is that how you say it? Peace be unto-- 776 00:40:04,126 --> 00:40:05,126 Oh, this is nice. 777 00:40:26,959 --> 00:40:29,293 You dudes have been ghosting me. What up with that? 778 00:40:29,876 --> 00:40:31,793 -No, we're-- -But I've got some news. 779 00:40:31,876 --> 00:40:34,376 Houston, we have an offer. 780 00:40:34,959 --> 00:40:36,168 -What? -Um. [clears throat] 781 00:40:36,876 --> 00:40:40,501 Um, it's an offer for your dad's, uh, personal training. 782 00:40:40,584 --> 00:40:42,501 And since you already paid for that jelly belly, 783 00:40:42,584 --> 00:40:44,959 I'm gonna throw in some abs and thighs. That's what that is. 784 00:40:45,543 --> 00:40:47,251 -Thank you. -Great. 785 00:40:47,334 --> 00:40:53,251 Hey, Chris, honey, why don't you go put that, uh, toy in the toy-drive area. 786 00:40:53,334 --> 00:40:55,709 Yeah, we're so proud of you. We really are. 787 00:40:57,251 --> 00:40:58,251 [gasps] 788 00:40:59,584 --> 00:41:02,876 Well, I'm definitely a child in need. Need of this. 789 00:41:02,959 --> 00:41:04,334 -Can I help you? -Oh, yes. 790 00:41:04,418 --> 00:41:06,168 Can I get a shopping cart, please? 791 00:41:06,251 --> 00:41:08,168 -Mmm? -Shopping cart. 792 00:41:09,293 --> 00:41:10,626 Oh! [laughs] 793 00:41:10,709 --> 00:41:12,043 No, sweetheart. 794 00:41:12,126 --> 00:41:15,501 These toys are for children less fortunate than you. 795 00:41:15,584 --> 00:41:19,293 Ah, okay. Thought it was too good to be true. 796 00:41:19,376 --> 00:41:21,084 [Max] Whoa, cool. 797 00:41:21,168 --> 00:41:22,751 Thank you, young man. 798 00:41:22,834 --> 00:41:26,834 And I hope you both have a very, very happy Christmas. 799 00:41:26,918 --> 00:41:29,501 -That's unlikely. -Why? What's wrong? Parent trouble? 800 00:41:29,584 --> 00:41:30,751 [sighs] Yeah. 801 00:41:30,834 --> 00:41:32,168 [scoffs] Tell me about it. 802 00:41:32,251 --> 00:41:34,376 They think I don't notice that they're stressed, 803 00:41:34,459 --> 00:41:36,001 but it's super obvious. 804 00:41:36,084 --> 00:41:39,876 Some weird guy keeps showing up pretending to be a personal trainer. 805 00:41:39,959 --> 00:41:41,959 So? What do you say? 806 00:41:42,043 --> 00:41:44,418 -What-- Who-- Who made this offer? -Oh, the Breckins. 807 00:41:44,501 --> 00:41:46,501 Remember the young couple from the city? 808 00:41:46,584 --> 00:41:49,584 Yeah, so they need to sign the contract before the new year. 809 00:41:49,668 --> 00:41:51,584 Something about a tax thing. 810 00:41:51,668 --> 00:41:53,834 -We can't do that. -That's impossible. 811 00:41:53,918 --> 00:41:56,584 Yeah, rich people. Am I right? We're the worst. 812 00:41:57,168 --> 00:42:00,876 [sighs] But listen, we're not gonna get a better offer than this. 813 00:42:00,959 --> 00:42:04,376 So, why don't you take the holiday, think it over and get back to me. 814 00:42:04,459 --> 00:42:07,793 All right? No presh. Well, maybe a little presh. 815 00:42:07,876 --> 00:42:11,043 [chuckles] All right, you know, it's a lot of presh, actually. 816 00:42:11,126 --> 00:42:13,126 All right, cool. Merry Christmas. 817 00:42:13,209 --> 00:42:15,709 You know what? Can I give you a couple of my business cards? 818 00:42:15,793 --> 00:42:17,918 Yeah. Gavin Washington. I do real estate. 819 00:42:18,001 --> 00:42:20,043 At least you're with your mum and dad. 820 00:42:20,126 --> 00:42:23,251 Mine have gone to Tokyo. I'm totally on my own. 821 00:42:23,334 --> 00:42:24,876 That's the coolest thing ever. 822 00:42:24,959 --> 00:42:29,959 I thought it would be, and for about an hour, it was. 823 00:42:30,043 --> 00:42:33,793 But now I'm just lonely. 824 00:42:34,501 --> 00:42:36,668 Here. Have this. 825 00:42:36,751 --> 00:42:39,168 Sounds like you deserve it as much as anybody. 826 00:42:39,251 --> 00:42:41,376 -Merry Christmas. -You too. 827 00:42:41,459 --> 00:42:44,668 Enjoy it with your family. That's what makes it special. 828 00:42:47,584 --> 00:42:48,709 Nice kid. 829 00:42:50,209 --> 00:42:54,084 Thank you. You're a kind little boy. 830 00:42:54,168 --> 00:42:57,918 I think that Santa's gonna bring you everything you want this year. 831 00:42:58,001 --> 00:43:01,043 That'd be nice, but to be honest, 832 00:43:01,126 --> 00:43:04,251 all I really want is my mum and dad back. 833 00:43:04,334 --> 00:43:08,043 Oh, dear. Well, when did you lose them? 834 00:43:08,126 --> 00:43:09,959 Um, two days ago. 835 00:43:10,043 --> 00:43:14,793 Oh. Right at Christmas? You poor little thing. 836 00:43:14,876 --> 00:43:16,751 [stammers] But who's taking care of you? 837 00:43:16,834 --> 00:43:21,376 Uh, it's just me and Goobie at home, but we're getting by all right. 838 00:43:21,459 --> 00:43:24,293 [priest] For Zion's sake, I will not keep silent… 839 00:43:24,376 --> 00:43:26,084 Pam. Pam, it's the kid. 840 00:43:26,709 --> 00:43:28,001 [Pam gasps] 841 00:43:28,668 --> 00:43:31,584 You're right. It is. Who's the old lady? 842 00:43:32,251 --> 00:43:34,459 Oh, at the open house, the kid's mom said 843 00:43:34,543 --> 00:43:37,584 she was gonna leave the kid behind with the grandmother. 844 00:43:37,668 --> 00:43:39,626 I can't believe she went through with that. 845 00:43:39,709 --> 00:43:42,793 So grandma's the German. 846 00:43:42,876 --> 00:43:45,126 Grandma's the German. 847 00:43:47,084 --> 00:43:48,793 [Jeff] All right. So what's the plan? 848 00:43:48,876 --> 00:43:52,751 It's perfect. We go now while they're not home and get our doll back. 849 00:43:52,834 --> 00:43:56,293 The way old ladies drive, we'll be in and out before they leave the parking lot. 850 00:43:57,126 --> 00:44:00,501 [tires screeching] 851 00:44:01,084 --> 00:44:04,293 Wow, I need to come to church more often. 852 00:44:13,334 --> 00:44:14,376 [people chatter] 853 00:44:17,793 --> 00:44:19,584 [Pam] The street's too hot right now. 854 00:44:19,668 --> 00:44:21,043 We'll wait till it gets dark. 855 00:44:21,126 --> 00:44:22,543 We'll go around back. 856 00:44:23,168 --> 00:44:25,168 Okay, Axel Foley. 857 00:44:25,668 --> 00:44:26,709 [crowd chatters] 858 00:44:26,793 --> 00:44:29,876 [PA: ticket agent] Standby... [continues in Japanese] 859 00:44:29,959 --> 00:44:31,543 [baby laughing] 860 00:44:33,793 --> 00:44:36,084 [baby babbling, laughing] 861 00:44:37,626 --> 00:44:43,709 -[PA system dings] -Standby. [continues in Japanese] 862 00:44:43,793 --> 00:44:45,834 -Sorry, did you just hear stand-- standby? -Huh? 863 00:44:46,418 --> 00:44:50,876 Sorry, sorry, sorry. Excuse me, excuse me, excuse me. Sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry. 864 00:44:50,959 --> 00:44:52,001 Um… 865 00:44:53,834 --> 00:44:56,418 Sorry, uh, sorry. Uh, konnichiwa. 866 00:44:56,501 --> 00:44:57,584 [stammers] 867 00:44:57,668 --> 00:45:02,209 When will the-- [stammers] the stand-- the standby seats, 868 00:45:02,293 --> 00:45:04,459 um, be announced? When? 869 00:45:04,543 --> 00:45:05,793 A-Announced? 870 00:45:05,876 --> 00:45:07,459 [microphone feedback] 871 00:45:07,543 --> 00:45:11,334 Ma'am, I'd be more than happy to help you after you stand in the line behind you. 872 00:45:11,418 --> 00:45:13,543 Thank you, and happy season. 873 00:45:15,293 --> 00:45:19,126 I am trying to get home to my son, 874 00:45:19,209 --> 00:45:22,293 who's alone and scared, and he needs his mother. 875 00:45:22,376 --> 00:45:24,751 So I need you to answer my question right now. 876 00:45:27,001 --> 00:45:30,209 Standby seat assignments will be announced after the check-in window closes 877 00:45:30,293 --> 00:45:32,459 approximately one hour before departure. 878 00:45:34,418 --> 00:45:35,543 Thank you. 879 00:45:36,043 --> 00:45:37,043 And sorry. 880 00:45:37,876 --> 00:45:38,918 And sorry. 881 00:45:39,001 --> 00:45:42,918 Oh, not a problem. Thank you for flying with us. 882 00:45:44,626 --> 00:45:45,626 Hi. 883 00:45:46,251 --> 00:45:47,459 So we're doing this? 884 00:45:47,543 --> 00:45:48,918 Yeah, just act casual. 885 00:45:50,459 --> 00:45:51,876 -Just going for a walk. -Yeah. 886 00:45:51,959 --> 00:45:56,168 [Jeff] It's just a stroll through people's backyards a-at night. 887 00:45:56,251 --> 00:45:58,168 Through some undergrowth. 888 00:45:58,251 --> 00:46:00,459 -It's the most natural thing in the world. -Yeah. 889 00:46:03,168 --> 00:46:04,959 [Jeff] Do you know where you're going? 890 00:46:05,043 --> 00:46:06,626 Yes. Now follow me. 891 00:46:08,043 --> 00:46:11,043 [priest] …you shall be a crown of beauty in the hands of the Lord. 892 00:46:11,126 --> 00:46:12,334 -[phone beeps] -Hey, where are they? 893 00:46:12,418 --> 00:46:15,751 "Forgot to preheat the oven. Be back soon." 894 00:46:16,334 --> 00:46:18,626 -That's a two-person job? -I don't know. 895 00:46:18,709 --> 00:46:20,459 -[woman] Shh. -Oh, look. It's starting. 896 00:46:20,543 --> 00:46:23,418 -Oh, here we go. -Oh, look at Abby. She looks so good. 897 00:46:23,501 --> 00:46:25,709 [choir singing] ♪ O, holy night! ♪ 898 00:46:25,793 --> 00:46:30,334 ♪ The stars are brightly shining ♪ 899 00:46:30,418 --> 00:46:32,251 ♪ It is the night… ♪ 900 00:46:32,334 --> 00:46:33,334 This is it. 901 00:46:33,418 --> 00:46:37,709 ♪ Of the dear Savior's birth ♪ 902 00:46:37,793 --> 00:46:39,584 [Jeff] Why's the wall so high? 903 00:46:39,668 --> 00:46:42,376 It's not like it's Buckingham Palace. 904 00:46:42,459 --> 00:46:44,376 Okay. Here's what we'll do. 905 00:46:44,459 --> 00:46:47,668 I'm gonna boost you up, and then when you get to the top, you'll lift me up. 906 00:46:47,751 --> 00:46:49,793 -Do you think you can do that? -Yeah. 907 00:46:49,876 --> 00:46:50,876 Okay. 908 00:46:50,959 --> 00:46:52,793 -[Jeff grunts] -Okay, okay. 909 00:46:52,876 --> 00:46:53,876 [Pam] Okay. Ready? 910 00:46:53,959 --> 00:46:55,501 -[Pam] Okay. -[both groan] 911 00:46:55,584 --> 00:46:59,876 ♪ Fall on your knees ♪ 912 00:46:59,959 --> 00:47:01,793 -[Pam grunting] -[grunts] 913 00:47:01,876 --> 00:47:03,793 [Jeff speaks indistinctly] Just-- Whoa! 914 00:47:03,876 --> 00:47:05,251 -[Pam] Just-- Ow! -[grunts] 915 00:47:05,334 --> 00:47:08,793 ♪ The angel voices ♪ 916 00:47:08,876 --> 00:47:10,543 [Pam grunts] Okay. Just-- 917 00:47:13,459 --> 00:47:15,418 -[Jeff] One, two. -[Pam grunting] 918 00:47:15,501 --> 00:47:16,668 [Jeff farts] 919 00:47:16,751 --> 00:47:18,168 -Oh, my God. -I'm sorry. I'm sorry. 920 00:47:18,251 --> 00:47:20,126 -I'm sorry. -[Pam retches] 921 00:47:21,084 --> 00:47:22,459 Just get up there. 922 00:47:23,043 --> 00:47:25,501 [sighs] Okay. Three. 923 00:47:25,584 --> 00:47:26,793 [both grunt] 924 00:47:27,876 --> 00:47:29,959 -[Jeff] Now climb up me. -Okay. 925 00:47:30,043 --> 00:47:31,626 [Pam grunting] 926 00:47:34,001 --> 00:47:36,918 -[Pam pants, grunts] -[Jeff] Oh, no! 927 00:47:37,001 --> 00:47:39,126 [grunts] 928 00:47:39,918 --> 00:47:42,209 [Jeff straining] 929 00:47:42,293 --> 00:47:45,918 [Jeff screams, grunts] 930 00:47:46,001 --> 00:47:47,418 [Jeff] Take my hand. 931 00:47:48,001 --> 00:47:51,501 -[Pam grunts] -[Jeff screams] 932 00:47:51,584 --> 00:47:53,376 [grunts] 933 00:47:53,459 --> 00:47:56,793 ♪ His power ♪ 934 00:47:57,376 --> 00:47:58,834 Get up there. 935 00:47:58,918 --> 00:48:00,834 ♪ And glory ♪ 936 00:48:00,918 --> 00:48:03,626 [both groaning] 937 00:48:03,709 --> 00:48:04,918 Okay. 938 00:48:05,501 --> 00:48:06,501 I'm nearly up. 939 00:48:07,584 --> 00:48:09,501 [both grunt] 940 00:48:10,501 --> 00:48:11,709 [grunts] 941 00:48:11,793 --> 00:48:12,959 [sighs] 942 00:48:15,918 --> 00:48:17,418 [whimpers] 943 00:48:17,501 --> 00:48:18,751 [sighs] 944 00:48:20,584 --> 00:48:22,751 -It's okay, Pam. I-- [screams] -[singing fades] 945 00:48:23,501 --> 00:48:24,709 [grunts] 946 00:48:25,751 --> 00:48:26,959 Oh. 947 00:48:27,043 --> 00:48:28,209 A gate. 948 00:48:30,793 --> 00:48:33,334 [Jeff grunting] 949 00:48:34,876 --> 00:48:35,876 Oh. 950 00:48:35,959 --> 00:48:38,084 [Jeff] A side gate? Really? 951 00:48:38,793 --> 00:48:41,376 I'm sorry, but it's not like you saw the gate either. 952 00:48:41,459 --> 00:48:44,168 [groans] Oh, I'm-- I'm fine by the way. Thank you. 953 00:48:50,876 --> 00:48:52,334 Come on. 954 00:48:53,959 --> 00:48:55,293 [sighs] 955 00:48:58,043 --> 00:48:59,543 -[speaks indistinctly] -[Jeff] What? 956 00:49:03,251 --> 00:49:04,376 [phone beeps] 957 00:49:06,043 --> 00:49:08,584 [choir singing] 958 00:49:08,668 --> 00:49:10,709 Oh. 959 00:49:10,793 --> 00:49:12,668 [Pam] That's our little girl. 960 00:49:12,751 --> 00:49:14,501 [choir continues] 961 00:49:14,584 --> 00:49:16,418 -Try the door. -Okay. 962 00:49:25,084 --> 00:49:29,209 "…the difference being that the clothes are made to fit you, 963 00:49:29,293 --> 00:49:30,959 while you have to be made to fit the tree." 964 00:49:31,043 --> 00:49:33,084 [woman] Better not let your father hear you say that. 965 00:49:33,168 --> 00:49:34,293 Okay, Mom. 966 00:49:34,376 --> 00:49:36,168 [man] "…wanted to with their buckets. 967 00:49:36,251 --> 00:49:39,334 And how ardently they grew to love their…" 968 00:49:43,001 --> 00:49:46,459 -[sighs] The wrong house. That's on me. -Yeah, yeah. I get the sense it was. 969 00:49:46,543 --> 00:49:48,001 Okay, let's just go next door. 970 00:49:48,084 --> 00:49:50,084 That's where he lives. We're gonna check it out. 971 00:49:51,501 --> 00:49:54,959 [both screaming] 972 00:49:57,209 --> 00:49:59,293 We're in a swimming pool! [screams] 973 00:49:59,376 --> 00:50:01,209 We're freezing! [screams] 974 00:50:01,293 --> 00:50:04,293 [Pam] Pulling you up! Come here! [screams] 975 00:50:04,376 --> 00:50:06,668 -[Pam] Come on! -[Pam and Jeff grunting] 976 00:50:06,751 --> 00:50:08,793 -[Pam] What should I do? -Get on my back! 977 00:50:08,876 --> 00:50:10,751 [both groaning, screaming] 978 00:50:13,751 --> 00:50:17,043 [man] "…one step, they leapt into the sky toward Neverland." 979 00:50:17,126 --> 00:50:19,501 Why are man and lady drowning? 980 00:50:19,584 --> 00:50:22,334 No. They're not drowning. They're in the sky flying. 981 00:50:22,418 --> 00:50:25,543 -[Jeff] Okay. -[Pam] I'm up. I'm up. Okay. 982 00:50:27,126 --> 00:50:28,918 Swim. Swim to me. 983 00:50:29,001 --> 00:50:30,084 [Jeff grunts] 984 00:50:30,168 --> 00:50:31,168 [Pam] I got you. 985 00:50:31,751 --> 00:50:33,543 [Pam] Pull you up. Come here. 986 00:50:34,209 --> 00:50:35,751 [both grunting] 987 00:50:35,834 --> 00:50:37,293 [Pam grunts] And you're out. 988 00:50:37,376 --> 00:50:39,834 [both panting] 989 00:50:48,126 --> 00:50:49,543 What are we doing? 990 00:50:50,418 --> 00:50:51,626 I am a teacher. 991 00:50:52,584 --> 00:50:53,793 You're a data… 992 00:50:55,251 --> 00:50:57,918 -[Pam stammers] ...manager. -Migration manager. 993 00:50:59,959 --> 00:51:02,751 Maybe the universe is trying to tell us something, you know? 994 00:51:02,834 --> 00:51:05,126 I mean, maybe we should just cut our losses. 995 00:51:05,209 --> 00:51:06,793 -[Jeff screams] -[Pam grunts] 996 00:51:06,876 --> 00:51:09,168 -[grunts, pants] -[Jeff grunts] 997 00:51:09,251 --> 00:51:12,793 [both grunting, panting] 998 00:51:15,293 --> 00:51:16,293 No. 999 00:51:17,168 --> 00:51:18,543 We're not giving up. 1000 00:51:19,168 --> 00:51:20,543 We need a W, Pam. 1001 00:51:22,584 --> 00:51:24,001 A win. 1002 00:51:24,584 --> 00:51:25,626 Yeah. 1003 00:51:26,751 --> 00:51:28,209 We do deserve a W. 1004 00:51:29,959 --> 00:51:31,793 We're good people, Pam. 1005 00:51:31,876 --> 00:51:34,709 And we're gonna lose our home because Harry stinkin' Potter 1006 00:51:34,793 --> 00:51:38,543 comes into our house and steals the only thing that can fix our problems. 1007 00:51:39,584 --> 00:51:42,543 No. That's an injustice. 1008 00:51:43,918 --> 00:51:45,834 Yeah. That's not fair. 1009 00:51:45,918 --> 00:51:50,043 And-- And who are we if we give up now? I mean, what do we say to our kids? 1010 00:51:50,126 --> 00:51:51,959 "Oh, sorry we flushed your life down the toilet, 1011 00:51:52,043 --> 00:51:54,959 but life kept smacking us down with klepto kids 1012 00:51:55,043 --> 00:51:58,209 and German grandmothers and the stupid cloud." 1013 00:51:58,918 --> 00:52:01,584 I hate you, cloud. 1014 00:52:01,668 --> 00:52:03,084 Enough is enough. 1015 00:52:03,709 --> 00:52:09,376 Our W, our family's W, is in that house, and we're gonna get it. 1016 00:52:09,459 --> 00:52:12,001 Right now. 1017 00:52:12,668 --> 00:52:14,626 Well, I don't know about right now. Becau-- 1018 00:52:14,709 --> 00:52:16,418 I mean, they could come home at any second. 1019 00:52:16,501 --> 00:52:19,126 Also, my pants are starting to freeze. 1020 00:52:19,209 --> 00:52:20,709 Oh, mine too. 1021 00:52:21,793 --> 00:52:22,959 Like, I don't feel that. 1022 00:52:24,084 --> 00:52:25,293 At all. 1023 00:52:25,376 --> 00:52:29,293 So let's come back later, you know? Like after dinner, after b-bedtime even. 1024 00:52:29,376 --> 00:52:32,751 Midnight, you know? Like after-- after the old lady's gone to sleep. 1025 00:52:32,834 --> 00:52:34,501 Yeah, but what if the kid wakes up? 1026 00:52:34,584 --> 00:52:36,126 You know, kids are always running down 1027 00:52:36,209 --> 00:52:38,334 in the middle of the night to see if Santa came. 1028 00:52:39,668 --> 00:52:41,084 What if I dress as Santa? 1029 00:52:42,293 --> 00:52:44,668 He'll think I'm just Saint Nick. 1030 00:52:44,751 --> 00:52:46,209 But this Santa's gonna be leaving 1031 00:52:46,293 --> 00:52:49,626 with that $200,000 ugly little boy in his sack. 1032 00:52:50,334 --> 00:52:52,376 And that's how we win. [chuckles] 1033 00:52:53,376 --> 00:52:56,668 Okay. Midnight it is, Mr. Claus. 1034 00:53:05,918 --> 00:53:08,918 I'm not spending my best years in some old lady's bedroom. 1035 00:53:09,501 --> 00:53:11,834 -Homebot, search good booby traps. -[Homebot beeps] 1036 00:53:11,918 --> 00:53:16,043 [Homebot] I'm sorry, the parental controls of this system restrict the term "booby." 1037 00:53:16,126 --> 00:53:17,418 Never mind. 1038 00:53:18,918 --> 00:53:21,709 -I love this dress. -Ollie, Ollie, what is that? 1039 00:53:21,793 --> 00:53:23,834 -Hey, did you take that from the church? -Oh? 1040 00:53:23,918 --> 00:53:24,918 What-- 1041 00:53:25,418 --> 00:53:26,668 Oh. 1042 00:53:26,751 --> 00:53:29,876 [chuckling] Mom, Dad, where were you? 1043 00:53:29,959 --> 00:53:31,501 And wha-- what happened? 1044 00:53:31,584 --> 00:53:35,084 A car drove through a puddle and splashed us. 1045 00:53:35,168 --> 00:53:36,584 [Mei] What is-- 1046 00:53:36,668 --> 00:53:38,418 -Yuck. -[chuckles] Imagine that. 1047 00:53:39,251 --> 00:53:40,459 -Ew. -[Hunter] Hmm. 1048 00:53:41,043 --> 00:53:42,918 Well, we should get dinner ready, huh? 1049 00:53:43,001 --> 00:53:44,043 Yeah. 1050 00:53:47,251 --> 00:53:48,751 [airplane dings] 1051 00:54:12,209 --> 00:54:14,251 -Sorry. -Am I looking at your screen? 1052 00:54:14,334 --> 00:54:15,668 -Yes. -Oh, okay. 1053 00:54:15,751 --> 00:54:17,668 -Yes. -I didn't even realize I'm doing it. 1054 00:54:17,751 --> 00:54:19,626 -[chuckles] Classic. -[chuckling] Yeah. 1055 00:54:27,251 --> 00:54:29,251 -Sorry, you're doing it again. -I'm still doing it? 1056 00:54:29,334 --> 00:54:31,376 -Yes. -I just-- I just can't help it, you know? 1057 00:54:31,459 --> 00:54:33,668 This is my screen, and that's your screen, so… 1058 00:54:33,751 --> 00:54:36,668 -No, I know that. I know how screens work. -Yeah. 1059 00:54:37,293 --> 00:54:39,584 You know they got TV and films on there? 1060 00:54:39,668 --> 00:54:42,668 Yep, yep, fully aware. I'm just, um, eager to get home. 1061 00:54:43,251 --> 00:54:45,668 It's like watching a watched pot, though. It's not gonna boil. 1062 00:54:45,751 --> 00:54:48,918 Yeah, well, it might one day. 1063 00:54:49,001 --> 00:54:50,209 Okay. 1064 00:54:50,293 --> 00:54:52,709 -I'll just get some sleep. -Thank you. 1065 00:54:52,793 --> 00:54:55,334 -Would you like some of my blanket? Okay. -No. 1066 00:55:00,793 --> 00:55:03,543 -Sorry. I'm sorry. -Apology accepted. 1067 00:55:08,376 --> 00:55:11,043 So, Mei wanted to spend Christmas in Hawaii this year, 1068 00:55:11,126 --> 00:55:13,334 but I told her, we just gotta suck it up and come here 1069 00:55:13,418 --> 00:55:15,293 because I knew you guys would appreciate it. 1070 00:55:15,376 --> 00:55:16,918 [speaking in German] 1071 00:55:44,418 --> 00:55:46,501 He could be a model, and he's only-- 1072 00:55:46,584 --> 00:55:49,668 -How old are you? Four, right? -[Jeff] Like a runway model? 1073 00:55:49,751 --> 00:55:54,001 [Mei] Any kind of model. They say he has an incredible body for a boy his age. 1074 00:56:23,209 --> 00:56:25,918 ♪ Christmas time, so full of cheer ♪ 1075 00:56:26,001 --> 00:56:28,459 ♪ But not for the children Who live in fear ♪ 1076 00:56:28,543 --> 00:56:31,584 ♪ 'Cause it ain't about gifts and toys ♪ 1077 00:56:31,668 --> 00:56:35,543 ♪ For less fortunate girls and boys ♪ 1078 00:56:52,626 --> 00:56:55,251 [Mei singing] ♪ In a world so full of famine and wars ♪ 1079 00:56:55,334 --> 00:56:57,959 ♪ We all need a little more Santa Claus ♪ 1080 00:57:10,209 --> 00:57:12,084 -Here you go. Just for the kids. -Chris. 1081 00:57:13,126 --> 00:57:15,126 -[Chris and Abby gasp] -No. 1082 00:57:15,209 --> 00:57:17,043 That's not the most expensive thing we bought you. 1083 00:57:17,126 --> 00:57:19,001 [Pam] We can't keep those. Thank you. 1084 00:57:48,834 --> 00:57:50,376 [yawns] 1085 00:57:51,293 --> 00:57:54,084 Oh, look at those snuggly, little elves all ready for bed. 1086 00:57:54,168 --> 00:57:57,001 Only a half-hour left till Christmas. See you in the morning. 1087 00:57:58,209 --> 00:58:00,293 -[footsteps depart] -[door closes] 1088 00:58:16,418 --> 00:58:18,209 Locked and loaded. 1089 00:58:19,084 --> 00:58:20,334 [Pam] Okay, we have a plan. 1090 00:58:20,418 --> 00:58:23,793 If we stick to it, we'll be back before anyone will even notice. 1091 00:58:25,751 --> 00:58:27,709 -Honey, slow down. -[tires screech] 1092 00:58:28,668 --> 00:58:29,876 Babe, slow down. 1093 00:58:29,959 --> 00:58:32,293 I'm trying. It's so icy. 1094 00:58:32,376 --> 00:58:33,501 [Pam] Put on the brakes! 1095 00:58:33,584 --> 00:58:35,834 -Steer into the slide. -No. 1096 00:58:35,918 --> 00:58:39,293 You pump into a slide, and you steer into a skid. 1097 00:58:39,376 --> 00:58:40,959 -Which one is this? -I'm not sure. 1098 00:58:41,043 --> 00:58:42,834 -[tires screech] -[both scream] 1099 00:58:43,918 --> 00:58:45,793 [both yell] 1100 00:58:45,876 --> 00:58:48,168 [Jeff grunts] 1101 00:58:48,251 --> 00:58:49,834 [chuckles] Yes. 1102 00:58:50,334 --> 00:58:53,959 -[both groaning] -[airbags squeal] 1103 00:58:54,043 --> 00:58:56,418 -Okay. -[Jeff] Okay. It's all over. 1104 00:58:57,501 --> 00:58:59,501 -Could've been worse. Could've-- -Yeah. 1105 00:58:59,584 --> 00:59:00,709 [both scream] 1106 00:59:00,793 --> 00:59:02,001 [laughs] 1107 00:59:03,168 --> 00:59:04,334 [sighs] 1108 00:59:09,209 --> 00:59:10,251 [Jeff clears throat] 1109 00:59:10,334 --> 00:59:14,251 Okay. Let's shake that off and focus. 1110 00:59:15,001 --> 00:59:17,168 [Pam] We are doing this. 1111 00:59:17,251 --> 00:59:19,001 [Jeff] We are doing it. 1112 00:59:19,959 --> 00:59:21,626 We'll be in and out before you-- 1113 00:59:21,709 --> 00:59:22,793 -[screams] -[Pam grunts] 1114 00:59:22,876 --> 00:59:23,793 [winces] 1115 00:59:23,876 --> 00:59:26,793 -This is not going well. -[groans] 1116 00:59:27,626 --> 00:59:29,459 I think I shattered my coccyx. 1117 00:59:29,543 --> 00:59:30,709 [Pam grunts] 1118 00:59:30,793 --> 00:59:32,959 -Be careful, Jeff. It's slippery. -[groans] 1119 00:59:33,834 --> 00:59:36,626 -Oh, really? Thanks for letting me know. -[grunts] 1120 00:59:36,709 --> 00:59:40,209 [both grunt, groan] 1121 00:59:41,751 --> 00:59:43,793 [Jeff] I think I've worked out a good method. 1122 00:59:45,751 --> 00:59:46,751 How are you doing? 1123 00:59:46,834 --> 00:59:48,168 [Pam] Good. I'm getting there. 1124 00:59:48,251 --> 00:59:49,834 -I'm gonna make it. -[Jeff grunts] 1125 00:59:50,501 --> 00:59:51,959 All right. I'm doing this. 1126 00:59:52,043 --> 00:59:59,043 -I'm right behind you, babe. [yelling] -One more step and I got [elongated] it. 1127 00:59:59,668 --> 01:00:01,751 -[Jeff] Save me! -Okay. I got you. 1128 01:00:08,334 --> 01:00:09,334 [Jeff groans] 1129 01:00:10,626 --> 01:00:13,001 [shouts] The motion sensor. 1130 01:00:13,084 --> 01:00:15,043 -Hide. -[Jeff] Why is it so bright? 1131 01:00:16,001 --> 01:00:16,959 Why is it so dark? 1132 01:00:17,876 --> 01:00:19,168 [grunts, groans] 1133 01:00:19,251 --> 01:00:20,751 [chuckles] 1134 01:00:25,543 --> 01:00:27,209 [screams, groans] 1135 01:00:27,293 --> 01:00:28,376 [groans] 1136 01:00:28,459 --> 01:00:30,168 Come over here, honey. Come over here. 1137 01:00:30,251 --> 01:00:31,459 -Okay. -Quick, quick. 1138 01:00:31,543 --> 01:00:33,084 [screams, grunts] 1139 01:00:33,168 --> 01:00:34,293 -[Pam] Oh! -[Jeff grunts] 1140 01:00:34,376 --> 01:00:36,251 Yes! [chuckles] 1141 01:00:36,334 --> 01:00:38,626 What's the lumen count on that thing? 1142 01:00:38,709 --> 01:00:40,043 Oh, man. 1143 01:00:40,126 --> 01:00:43,334 Hey, what if they're awake? 1144 01:00:46,126 --> 01:00:47,209 Wait here. 1145 01:00:48,084 --> 01:00:49,168 -[Pam grunts] -[Jeff] Oh. 1146 01:00:49,793 --> 01:00:50,793 [chuckles] 1147 01:00:52,168 --> 01:00:53,543 Now it's re-tangling. 1148 01:00:53,626 --> 01:00:55,126 Go the other way. Now turn. Face. 1149 01:00:55,209 --> 01:00:57,209 -It's getting more wrapped up. -Rotate. 1150 01:00:58,209 --> 01:01:00,168 -[Pam] You're not helping. -[Jeff] Yes, I am. 1151 01:01:00,876 --> 01:01:02,334 -Okay. Yeah, I did it. -Okay. 1152 01:01:06,334 --> 01:01:07,584 I'm going round back. 1153 01:01:15,168 --> 01:01:16,376 Aw. 1154 01:01:23,334 --> 01:01:26,959 [Jeff] "Dear Santa. I tried waiting up for you, but I'm too sleepy. 1155 01:01:27,043 --> 01:01:28,418 Come on in!" 1156 01:01:28,501 --> 01:01:31,418 [chuckles] Aw. 1157 01:01:35,668 --> 01:01:36,668 Mmm. 1158 01:01:41,043 --> 01:01:42,251 [grunts] 1159 01:01:43,584 --> 01:01:45,876 [gags] Milk hot! 1160 01:01:46,584 --> 01:01:48,001 Why milk hot? 1161 01:01:48,084 --> 01:01:49,376 [screams] 1162 01:01:49,459 --> 01:01:51,793 [grunting] 1163 01:01:57,626 --> 01:01:58,668 [soda fizzes] 1164 01:02:01,251 --> 01:02:02,876 [soda bubbles, fizzes] 1165 01:02:02,959 --> 01:02:05,418 [soda bubbling] 1166 01:02:08,626 --> 01:02:11,793 [soda fizzing] 1167 01:02:13,043 --> 01:02:14,709 [soda fizzes] 1168 01:02:15,501 --> 01:02:16,501 Hmm. 1169 01:02:19,126 --> 01:02:21,084 [screaming] 1170 01:02:21,168 --> 01:02:22,084 [laughs] 1171 01:02:23,334 --> 01:02:24,751 Bombs away. 1172 01:02:26,834 --> 01:02:28,584 Stop! Stop! 1173 01:02:28,668 --> 01:02:32,584 [Pam grunting] 1174 01:02:33,168 --> 01:02:36,209 You know, I guess my mum was right. Soda is bad for you. 1175 01:02:36,293 --> 01:02:38,668 Wait! We just want our doll-- [grunts] 1176 01:02:38,751 --> 01:02:40,918 Stop! We can talk. 1177 01:02:41,418 --> 01:02:42,626 [grunts] We just want our-- 1178 01:02:44,709 --> 01:02:45,876 [grunts] 1179 01:02:45,959 --> 01:02:48,251 How the heck do you have so much soda? 1180 01:02:48,334 --> 01:02:51,668 My parents buy in bulk. It's more cost effective. 1181 01:02:53,209 --> 01:02:56,918 And forget about taking this $200,000 ugly boy. 1182 01:02:57,959 --> 01:02:59,376 We're not here to hurt you. 1183 01:03:00,418 --> 01:03:04,668 Please, just calm down, and we can talk about this rationally. 1184 01:03:06,584 --> 01:03:08,959 So easy on the soda, okay? 1185 01:03:09,043 --> 01:03:12,043 Ah. [screams] 1186 01:03:12,126 --> 01:03:15,793 [whimpers] 1187 01:03:15,876 --> 01:03:18,918 [screams] 1188 01:03:19,001 --> 01:03:20,084 [whimpers] 1189 01:03:20,168 --> 01:03:21,584 Ouch! Ouch! 1190 01:03:21,668 --> 01:03:23,793 Ow! Ow! Ooh! 1191 01:03:23,876 --> 01:03:25,751 [grunting] 1192 01:03:25,834 --> 01:03:28,918 [pants] 1193 01:03:37,334 --> 01:03:38,793 [machine beeps] 1194 01:03:42,001 --> 01:03:44,376 [alarm blaring] 1195 01:03:44,459 --> 01:03:45,543 [electronic voice] Alarm! 1196 01:03:47,209 --> 01:03:49,126 One, one, one, two-- 1197 01:03:49,209 --> 01:03:50,209 [groaning, cries] 1198 01:03:50,293 --> 01:03:51,751 -[keypad beeps] -[alarm stops] 1199 01:03:52,751 --> 01:03:55,584 Santa? Is that you? 1200 01:03:55,668 --> 01:03:57,043 [groans] 1201 01:03:57,126 --> 01:04:00,584 Ho! Ho! Ho! How are you, little boy? 1202 01:04:00,668 --> 01:04:02,626 Orange stripe, center pocket. 1203 01:04:02,709 --> 01:04:03,751 No! 1204 01:04:03,834 --> 01:04:04,834 [grunts] 1205 01:04:07,001 --> 01:04:10,584 Ooh! That did not sound right. [chuckles] 1206 01:04:18,876 --> 01:04:19,876 [pants] 1207 01:04:32,584 --> 01:04:36,751 [grunting] 1208 01:04:36,834 --> 01:04:40,043 So hot and so cold at the same time. [cries] 1209 01:04:42,501 --> 01:04:43,501 Jeff? 1210 01:04:44,834 --> 01:04:46,209 Jeff! 1211 01:04:52,001 --> 01:04:53,001 [grunts] 1212 01:04:54,584 --> 01:04:55,751 Where am I? 1213 01:04:55,834 --> 01:04:59,418 -[Jeff gasps] What? This-- [whimpers] -[dogs barking] 1214 01:04:59,501 --> 01:05:01,209 -[Jeff] I'm scared. -[bird shrieks] 1215 01:05:03,501 --> 01:05:04,751 What is this? 1216 01:05:06,126 --> 01:05:07,376 [Jeff groans] 1217 01:05:07,459 --> 01:05:10,709 Okay. I'm okay. I have all my parts. 1218 01:05:12,376 --> 01:05:15,043 [whimpers] 1219 01:05:15,751 --> 01:05:17,668 -Am I dead? Is this dead? -[bird shrieks] 1220 01:05:18,168 --> 01:05:19,043 [gasps] 1221 01:05:19,126 --> 01:05:20,418 [screams, whimpers] 1222 01:05:21,168 --> 01:05:22,834 That's too high! I'm too high. 1223 01:05:22,918 --> 01:05:25,168 [grunts, pants] 1224 01:05:25,251 --> 01:05:27,668 I don't like-- [whimpers] 1225 01:05:27,751 --> 01:05:29,501 Where have you taken me? 1226 01:05:30,209 --> 01:05:31,543 You can do this, McKenzie. 1227 01:05:31,626 --> 01:05:33,876 -[stones fall] -Okay, you just gotta make it across. 1228 01:05:33,959 --> 01:05:35,209 Just one small jump. 1229 01:05:36,459 --> 01:05:38,584 [whimpers] 1230 01:05:38,668 --> 01:05:43,543 One, two, three! 1231 01:05:44,293 --> 01:05:45,418 [groans] 1232 01:05:45,501 --> 01:05:47,959 [laughs] 1233 01:05:48,043 --> 01:05:51,459 [groaning] 1234 01:05:51,543 --> 01:05:52,543 [Pam] Jeff? 1235 01:05:52,626 --> 01:05:54,793 [groans] 1236 01:05:54,876 --> 01:05:55,959 Jeff? 1237 01:05:56,918 --> 01:05:58,043 Jeff! 1238 01:05:59,376 --> 01:06:00,751 [bangs] 1239 01:06:00,834 --> 01:06:03,584 [banging] 1240 01:06:04,168 --> 01:06:05,834 There's something blocking the door. 1241 01:06:05,918 --> 01:06:07,043 [grunts] 1242 01:06:08,418 --> 01:06:09,959 [banging] 1243 01:06:10,043 --> 01:06:11,168 [grunting] 1244 01:06:11,251 --> 01:06:12,376 [sound distorts] 1245 01:06:15,543 --> 01:06:17,084 -[Jeff groans] -[Pam gasps] 1246 01:06:17,168 --> 01:06:19,334 -Oh, honey. -[Jeff groans] 1247 01:06:21,209 --> 01:06:22,668 -[Pam gasps] -[Jeff groans] 1248 01:06:23,834 --> 01:06:25,709 He's hurting me, Pam. 1249 01:06:26,543 --> 01:06:28,834 Me too, baby. Me too. 1250 01:06:30,043 --> 01:06:33,334 Little, limey monster tried to set me on fire. 1251 01:06:33,418 --> 01:06:35,918 Why's he doing this to us, Pam? 1252 01:06:37,168 --> 01:06:39,501 He just told me our 200 grand is getting away. 1253 01:06:39,584 --> 01:06:42,709 He has our doll, and he knows what it's worth. 1254 01:06:42,793 --> 01:06:43,793 [sighs] 1255 01:06:44,334 --> 01:06:45,709 We have to get it back. 1256 01:06:47,959 --> 01:06:49,168 -[joints crack] -[groans] 1257 01:06:51,209 --> 01:06:52,209 [Pam grunts] 1258 01:06:55,709 --> 01:06:56,876 [metal scraping] 1259 01:06:57,626 --> 01:06:58,959 Ow! 1260 01:06:59,043 --> 01:07:02,709 Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! 1261 01:07:06,959 --> 01:07:08,459 [pants] 1262 01:07:08,543 --> 01:07:09,793 Ow! 1263 01:07:10,834 --> 01:07:14,793 [groans] The Eiffel Tower? Really? [grunts] 1264 01:07:14,876 --> 01:07:16,543 [Legos clattering] 1265 01:07:16,626 --> 01:07:21,334 [grunts] 1266 01:07:24,626 --> 01:07:27,918 [whispers] Don't you dare judge me. I'm doing this for my family. 1267 01:07:33,334 --> 01:07:34,334 [snores] 1268 01:07:34,418 --> 01:07:38,043 [sniffles] 1269 01:07:38,126 --> 01:07:40,251 [snores] 1270 01:07:41,001 --> 01:07:42,543 [Jeff] You learned anything? 1271 01:07:42,626 --> 01:07:45,501 Just that this kid owns a lot of Legos. 1272 01:07:45,584 --> 01:07:46,959 [footsteps] 1273 01:07:47,043 --> 01:07:48,334 [Jeff speaks German] 1274 01:07:48,418 --> 01:07:50,043 [in German] We are coming in… 1275 01:07:51,126 --> 01:07:52,668 [in English] I forgot the word for peace. 1276 01:07:52,751 --> 01:07:54,209 -Yeah, look it up. -Okay, let's see. 1277 01:07:55,001 --> 01:07:58,709 -[Jeff murmurs] -"Pancake." No. "Potato." "Paralysis." 1278 01:07:58,793 --> 01:08:00,334 -[Max] Up here. -[Jeff] Oh, hey. 1279 01:08:00,418 --> 01:08:04,043 Okay. So-- So listen. [stammers] We just wanna talk. 1280 01:08:04,126 --> 01:08:06,168 [screams, grunts] 1281 01:08:06,251 --> 01:08:08,834 Would you just stop and talk to us? 1282 01:08:08,918 --> 01:08:10,501 [screams, grunts] 1283 01:08:10,584 --> 01:08:14,043 -Please! -[speaks German] 1284 01:08:14,126 --> 01:08:16,626 We are coming in Frieden. 1285 01:08:17,418 --> 01:08:18,793 Frieden is peace. 1286 01:08:18,876 --> 01:08:20,834 [Max] Come on up and get me! 1287 01:08:21,959 --> 01:08:22,959 [grunts] 1288 01:08:23,043 --> 01:08:24,043 Ouch. 1289 01:08:24,126 --> 01:08:27,834 [screams, grunts] 1290 01:08:27,918 --> 01:08:30,751 [Pam] He put butter on the stairs. 1291 01:08:30,834 --> 01:08:35,709 Flour, milk and butter. 1292 01:08:35,793 --> 01:08:37,168 He's turning me into a cookie. 1293 01:08:37,251 --> 01:08:39,376 Well, you need sugar for a cookie. 1294 01:08:41,418 --> 01:08:44,626 [groans, cries] 1295 01:08:47,293 --> 01:08:49,751 Who raised this little monster? 1296 01:08:50,918 --> 01:08:52,459 I think we should go back home. 1297 01:08:53,126 --> 01:08:54,709 There is no going back. 1298 01:08:54,793 --> 01:08:56,584 This is who we are now. 1299 01:08:57,376 --> 01:08:59,084 This is the life we've chosen. 1300 01:09:00,709 --> 01:09:02,168 We've gone to the other side. 1301 01:09:07,209 --> 01:09:08,626 You'll never find me. 1302 01:09:10,459 --> 01:09:12,751 [grunts] 1303 01:09:26,084 --> 01:09:29,834 [screams] 1304 01:09:35,668 --> 01:09:38,126 Harry Potter turned me into a pincushion. 1305 01:09:43,543 --> 01:09:46,459 Good job, honey. I'll be right there. 1306 01:09:48,084 --> 01:09:52,418 [groans] 1307 01:09:52,501 --> 01:09:53,501 [grunts] 1308 01:09:54,251 --> 01:09:55,376 Or not. 1309 01:09:59,376 --> 01:10:02,501 [whirring] 1310 01:10:02,584 --> 01:10:03,876 Well, hello. 1311 01:10:12,751 --> 01:10:13,709 Catch. 1312 01:10:15,043 --> 01:10:18,918 Oh, no. You hit me with the incredibly soft yoga ball. 1313 01:10:19,001 --> 01:10:20,543 [grunts] 1314 01:10:21,376 --> 01:10:24,293 [screams] 1315 01:10:24,376 --> 01:10:25,751 [Jeff screams] 1316 01:10:25,834 --> 01:10:30,876 [Pam screams, grunts] 1317 01:10:32,668 --> 01:10:33,668 [sighs] 1318 01:10:35,668 --> 01:10:37,168 Go get him, Jeff. 1319 01:10:37,251 --> 01:10:38,459 [groans] 1320 01:10:40,918 --> 01:10:43,668 [Max] Given up yet? Or are you thirsty for more? 1321 01:10:43,751 --> 01:10:44,918 [breathing heavily] 1322 01:10:45,001 --> 01:10:46,209 [joints crack] 1323 01:10:52,584 --> 01:10:55,751 Eight ball. Your face. 1324 01:11:00,251 --> 01:11:02,459 There's nowhere to run now, little man. 1325 01:11:04,001 --> 01:11:05,418 [Max] We'll see about that. 1326 01:11:09,376 --> 01:11:10,376 See ya. 1327 01:11:15,668 --> 01:11:17,793 Pam, he jumped off the balcony! 1328 01:11:18,709 --> 01:11:19,834 Good. 1329 01:11:20,459 --> 01:11:21,459 [pants] 1330 01:11:23,126 --> 01:11:24,168 The jacket. 1331 01:11:26,584 --> 01:11:28,543 Oh, no. A ladder. 1332 01:11:29,584 --> 01:11:32,418 [chuckles] You really think I'm that stupid? 1333 01:11:41,126 --> 01:11:42,501 [groans] 1334 01:11:43,168 --> 01:11:46,334 Yes. Yes, I do. 1335 01:11:46,959 --> 01:11:50,418 [whispers] Dolly? [pants] 1336 01:11:57,501 --> 01:11:58,501 What? 1337 01:11:59,918 --> 01:12:01,126 [groans] 1338 01:12:03,626 --> 01:12:05,084 Aw. 1339 01:12:09,543 --> 01:12:12,418 That's it. Time's up, little guy. 1340 01:12:19,251 --> 01:12:21,793 [whimpering] 1341 01:12:26,876 --> 01:12:28,751 [whimpers] 1342 01:12:29,376 --> 01:12:32,084 [screams, groans] 1343 01:12:33,126 --> 01:12:34,209 No! 1344 01:12:35,084 --> 01:12:36,501 [whimpers] 1345 01:12:36,584 --> 01:12:40,251 [growls] 1346 01:12:41,376 --> 01:12:42,584 [Pam] That's far enough. 1347 01:12:44,376 --> 01:12:45,876 Well, hello there. 1348 01:12:47,584 --> 01:12:49,418 -[Jeff whimpers] -I'll do it. 1349 01:12:49,501 --> 01:12:52,459 Please, please, please no more pool balls. 1350 01:12:52,543 --> 01:12:54,376 Drop the gun. 1351 01:12:54,459 --> 01:12:57,251 Not a chance. 1352 01:12:57,334 --> 01:13:00,209 -[gun cocks] -I'm not playing around, lady. 1353 01:13:00,293 --> 01:13:03,751 [whimpers] He's not. He-- He shot me with several pool balls tonight. 1354 01:13:03,834 --> 01:13:05,043 Enough! 1355 01:13:05,126 --> 01:13:06,668 This stops here. 1356 01:13:08,251 --> 01:13:10,418 You picked the wrong mom to mess with. 1357 01:13:22,959 --> 01:13:24,209 [screams] 1358 01:13:24,959 --> 01:13:26,168 [screams] 1359 01:13:26,251 --> 01:13:27,876 -[grunts] -[Jeff] Honey, are you okay? 1360 01:13:28,876 --> 01:13:32,959 Please, no more Legos or fire 1361 01:13:33,043 --> 01:13:36,251 or freaking thumbtacks. We just wanna talk. 1362 01:13:36,334 --> 01:13:38,834 Yeah, right. I heard your plan. 1363 01:13:38,918 --> 01:13:41,168 You wanna kidnap "the ugly boy" 1364 01:13:41,251 --> 01:13:44,251 and sell me to some old lady for 200 large. 1365 01:13:44,334 --> 01:13:45,168 What? 1366 01:13:45,959 --> 01:13:46,959 What? [scoffs] 1367 01:13:47,043 --> 01:13:50,751 And I'm not ugly. My mum says I've got character. 1368 01:13:51,918 --> 01:13:53,043 You thought-- 1369 01:13:53,126 --> 01:13:54,418 [stammers] 1370 01:13:54,501 --> 01:13:57,334 Is that why you made this death maze? 1371 01:13:57,418 --> 01:13:59,376 Kid, we just want our doll back. 1372 01:13:59,459 --> 01:14:00,584 What doll? 1373 01:14:00,668 --> 01:14:05,376 The one you stole from our house. The boy with the bad face. The ugly boy. 1374 01:14:05,459 --> 01:14:08,168 That? I didn't steal that. 1375 01:14:09,668 --> 01:14:12,293 I'm ten years old. Why on earth would I want a doll? 1376 01:14:15,584 --> 01:14:20,209 Oh, no. This is bad. 1377 01:14:21,334 --> 01:14:22,543 We did a bad thing. 1378 01:14:23,668 --> 01:14:26,251 One of the worst bads we could've done. 1379 01:14:28,084 --> 01:14:31,251 I think we need to wake up your grandma. 1380 01:14:31,334 --> 01:14:33,834 You wanna call my grandma in England? 1381 01:14:33,918 --> 01:14:37,293 No. The grandma who's staying here. 1382 01:14:38,168 --> 01:14:39,459 From Germany. 1383 01:14:40,209 --> 01:14:41,543 [speaks German] 1384 01:14:42,584 --> 01:14:44,334 My grandma's not staying with me. 1385 01:14:45,334 --> 01:14:46,918 Well, then who is? 1386 01:14:54,834 --> 01:14:57,709 No one. It's just me. 1387 01:14:59,584 --> 01:15:00,709 What? 1388 01:15:00,793 --> 01:15:02,709 Wait, where are your parents? 1389 01:15:05,501 --> 01:15:06,959 Tokyo. 1390 01:15:07,626 --> 01:15:13,001 Oh. Sweetie, I am so sorry. 1391 01:15:13,834 --> 01:15:16,751 If we had known you were staying here by yourself, 1392 01:15:16,834 --> 01:15:19,293 we would've handled things a lot differently. 1393 01:15:20,668 --> 01:15:23,418 We wouldn't have broken into your home even once. 1394 01:15:23,501 --> 01:15:26,543 This was just a huge misunderstanding. 1395 01:15:26,626 --> 01:15:29,584 Now, why don't you just put that heavy gun down? 1396 01:15:30,668 --> 01:15:33,084 Oh, sweetie, come here. 1397 01:15:33,168 --> 01:15:34,668 You're safe now. 1398 01:15:34,751 --> 01:15:36,918 We'll take care of you, okay? 1399 01:15:38,126 --> 01:15:39,418 Okay. 1400 01:15:44,043 --> 01:15:48,709 [all scream] 1401 01:15:48,793 --> 01:15:52,251 [Jeff whimpers, screams] 1402 01:15:53,209 --> 01:15:55,001 [pants] 1403 01:15:55,084 --> 01:15:58,209 Okay, I know what it looks like… 1404 01:15:59,501 --> 01:16:01,834 But that was genuinely an accident. 1405 01:16:01,918 --> 01:16:03,459 Well, I hope so. 1406 01:16:03,543 --> 01:16:05,834 Because-- [screams] No. 1407 01:16:05,918 --> 01:16:08,959 I gotta go take a-- I'm gonna go sit down. 1408 01:16:09,876 --> 01:16:13,584 Okay. Let's call your parents and let them know that you're okay. 1409 01:16:13,668 --> 01:16:16,084 You can stay with us till they get back. 1410 01:16:17,043 --> 01:16:19,501 I'm gonna be in so much trouble. 1411 01:16:19,584 --> 01:16:21,334 [clicks tongue] No, honey. 1412 01:16:21,418 --> 01:16:25,126 Your mom is just gonna be happy to see you. I promise. 1413 01:16:25,209 --> 01:16:26,334 [Jeff] At first. 1414 01:16:26,834 --> 01:16:29,543 But-- But then you'll be in trouble. 1415 01:16:29,626 --> 01:16:31,709 Pretty bad, I would-- I would imagine. 1416 01:16:31,793 --> 01:16:35,501 I think we're all gonna have quite a bit of explaining to do. 1417 01:16:38,084 --> 01:16:43,584 Okay, so, you go to this kid's house, because you think he stole the doll… 1418 01:16:43,668 --> 01:16:45,793 -[stammers] -…and on the way there, you hit a tree, 1419 01:16:45,876 --> 01:16:46,834 which is why… 1420 01:16:46,918 --> 01:16:47,918 Yeah. 1421 01:16:48,001 --> 01:16:50,334 And then when you get to this kid's house, he's home alone? 1422 01:16:51,043 --> 01:16:53,251 -Yes. Pretty much, yeah. Yes. -Mm-hmm. 1423 01:16:53,334 --> 01:16:55,293 [clicks tongue] Wow. 1424 01:16:55,376 --> 01:16:57,293 How about your mom? Have you talked to her? 1425 01:16:57,376 --> 01:16:59,668 Yeah, we called her when she landed. 1426 01:16:59,751 --> 01:17:03,084 She cried happy tears. I didn't even know you could do that. 1427 01:17:03,168 --> 01:17:06,418 So, are we moving? 1428 01:17:12,334 --> 01:17:13,793 I'm sorry, guys… 1429 01:17:15,126 --> 01:17:17,876 But we got an offer on the house, 1430 01:17:17,959 --> 01:17:21,459 and we can't afford not to take it. 1431 01:17:23,751 --> 01:17:25,084 But it's okay, 1432 01:17:25,168 --> 01:17:29,501 because what makes this house so special to us is us. 1433 01:17:30,168 --> 01:17:31,168 Right? 1434 01:17:34,209 --> 01:17:35,959 Your mum speaks a lot of sense. 1435 01:17:37,209 --> 01:17:41,751 Without my mum and dad, my house really didn't feel like home. 1436 01:17:46,376 --> 01:17:50,293 Oh, babe, what if one of those open house poacher people took the doll? 1437 01:17:50,376 --> 01:17:52,168 -Mmm, yes. -Jeff, have you heard about this? 1438 01:17:52,251 --> 01:17:55,418 They just come into your house and take all of your valuables. It's crazy. 1439 01:17:55,501 --> 01:17:57,834 Greta Van Susteren did a thing about it on 60 Minutes. 1440 01:17:57,918 --> 01:17:59,626 -Full hour. Yeah. -Full hour. 1441 01:17:59,709 --> 01:18:01,668 -Who knows? -Greta Van Susteren knows. 1442 01:18:01,751 --> 01:18:05,709 But it's gone now, and, you know, we need to-- 1443 01:18:09,959 --> 01:18:11,126 Ollie? 1444 01:18:12,126 --> 01:18:13,209 Doll. 1445 01:18:14,876 --> 01:18:18,043 Ollie, angel, do not move. 1446 01:18:18,793 --> 01:18:21,501 [speaks Spanish] 1447 01:18:21,584 --> 01:18:27,584 -["Carol of the Bells" playing] -[no audible dialogue] 1448 01:18:43,834 --> 01:18:45,626 [music continues] 1449 01:19:03,751 --> 01:19:05,834 [music continues] 1450 01:19:20,668 --> 01:19:23,168 [music fades] 1451 01:19:23,251 --> 01:19:24,251 [grunts] 1452 01:19:24,876 --> 01:19:26,334 -[groans] -That was incredible. 1453 01:19:26,418 --> 01:19:27,626 [stammers] Are you okay? 1454 01:19:27,709 --> 01:19:28,751 [chuckles] 1455 01:19:28,834 --> 01:19:31,751 Yeah. Yeah, I think we both are. 1456 01:19:32,251 --> 01:19:35,334 Hey, who would've thought Ollie was gonna save the day, right? 1457 01:19:35,418 --> 01:19:38,501 -[Mei] Yay, baby. Good job, my love. -[Hunter] Good job, buddy. 1458 01:19:38,584 --> 01:19:39,668 [doorbell rings] 1459 01:19:41,418 --> 01:19:42,668 [gasps] 1460 01:19:47,793 --> 01:19:48,793 Mum! 1461 01:19:49,751 --> 01:19:51,126 [bag thuds] 1462 01:19:51,709 --> 01:19:54,918 Max. Mmm. 1463 01:19:55,584 --> 01:19:58,834 Oh. I'm so sorry we left you, darling. 1464 01:19:58,918 --> 01:20:04,293 [chuckles] Let me look at you. [laughs] 1465 01:20:04,376 --> 01:20:05,709 You've got a great kid. 1466 01:20:07,626 --> 01:20:10,209 Yeah. Yeah, I really do. 1467 01:20:11,834 --> 01:20:14,959 He's very creative. 1468 01:20:15,043 --> 01:20:19,876 Creative. Yes. He's so creative. 1469 01:20:19,959 --> 01:20:23,043 Thank you. That's nice to, um-- 1470 01:20:23,126 --> 01:20:24,126 Oh. 1471 01:20:25,418 --> 01:20:27,334 Wow, that really was some fender bender. 1472 01:20:27,418 --> 01:20:28,709 -[chuckles] -[Pam] Mmm. 1473 01:20:28,793 --> 01:20:30,251 You should see the tree. 1474 01:20:35,376 --> 01:20:36,876 [gasps] Oh. 1475 01:20:36,959 --> 01:20:38,334 Do-- Do you wanna stay? 1476 01:20:38,418 --> 01:20:39,918 Because we have a lot of eggnog. 1477 01:20:40,001 --> 01:20:41,751 They got more nog than they know what to do with. 1478 01:20:41,834 --> 01:20:44,751 Oh. Uh, uh, thank you, but, uh, no. 1479 01:20:44,834 --> 01:20:46,418 I-- I, um… 1480 01:20:46,501 --> 01:20:49,043 I just wanna get this guy home now. [chuckles] 1481 01:20:49,126 --> 01:20:50,834 Never been so excited to see my house. 1482 01:20:50,918 --> 01:20:52,293 -[Carol chuckles] -Actually-- 1483 01:20:52,376 --> 01:20:54,543 -Yes! Home. -Mm-mmm. 1484 01:20:54,626 --> 01:20:56,459 Home is where the heart is. 1485 01:20:57,209 --> 01:20:58,543 "Sweet Home Alabama." 1486 01:20:59,584 --> 01:21:01,501 Homer's Odyssey. 1487 01:21:01,584 --> 01:21:04,168 -Where do they wind up at the end? -Home. 1488 01:21:04,251 --> 01:21:05,251 Spoiler alert. 1489 01:21:05,334 --> 01:21:07,793 You're probably too young to have read it, but they end up at home. 1490 01:21:07,876 --> 01:21:09,168 [Carol] Yeah, that's lovely. 1491 01:21:09,251 --> 01:21:11,668 -There is no place like home. Thank you. -Thank you. 1492 01:21:13,251 --> 01:21:14,668 Come on, you. 1493 01:21:18,209 --> 01:21:19,501 Merry Christmas, Max. 1494 01:21:20,668 --> 01:21:21,959 Be good. 1495 01:21:22,043 --> 01:21:23,084 You too. 1496 01:21:24,043 --> 01:21:25,876 [Carol] Ooh. I need another hug. 1497 01:21:25,959 --> 01:21:26,959 Aw. 1498 01:21:27,793 --> 01:21:29,209 -I missed you so much. -[Max chuckles] 1499 01:21:29,293 --> 01:21:31,459 [Carol] Hey, I hope the house isn't a mess. 1500 01:21:34,043 --> 01:21:35,584 -[Jeff whispers indistinctly] -Wow. 1501 01:21:37,834 --> 01:21:39,376 -[Jeff groans] -Wow. 1502 01:21:39,459 --> 01:21:42,209 -She must be so happy to finally be home. -Yeah. 1503 01:21:44,501 --> 01:21:49,168 Because I guess home is just another word for family, right? 1504 01:21:49,251 --> 01:21:51,501 So, does that mean we get to stay here? 1505 01:21:56,376 --> 01:21:58,834 -Yeah, sweetie. It does. -[Chris] Yes. 1506 01:21:58,918 --> 01:22:01,084 -Yeah. -[Pam chuckles] 1507 01:22:01,709 --> 01:22:03,168 -[Chris chuckles] -[grunting] 1508 01:22:03,251 --> 01:22:06,918 Mommy's ribs. Mommy's ribs are sore. 1509 01:22:07,001 --> 01:22:08,501 So glad they're not poor anymore. 1510 01:22:08,584 --> 01:22:10,668 -It made me so uncomfortable. -It was so awkward. 1511 01:22:11,501 --> 01:22:13,334 Hey, what do you say we open some presents? 1512 01:22:13,418 --> 01:22:14,709 -[Chris gasps] Yes! -Yes! 1513 01:22:16,209 --> 01:22:18,543 -[Abby] Can I open the big one? -[Chris] Oh, my gosh! 1514 01:22:18,626 --> 01:22:20,543 -Merry Christmas. -Merry Christmas. 1515 01:22:20,626 --> 01:22:22,126 -[Abby] I call opening first. -Me first. 1516 01:22:22,209 --> 01:22:24,251 [Pam] Okay, guys. One at a time. 1517 01:22:24,334 --> 01:22:26,001 -[Chris] Thank you, Dad. -[Abby] Thank you. 1518 01:22:26,084 --> 01:22:27,084 I love it. 1519 01:22:27,168 --> 01:22:28,376 [all laugh] 1520 01:22:28,459 --> 01:22:30,501 [Carol] You wouldn't believe how much I missed you. 1521 01:22:30,584 --> 01:22:32,959 It's just gonna be two of us for Christmas, hey? 1522 01:22:33,043 --> 01:22:34,918 -That'll be nice, won't it? -Mm-hmm. 1523 01:22:35,001 --> 01:22:36,501 [Carol] Oh, dear. What a day. 1524 01:22:37,251 --> 01:22:38,418 [Carol grunts] 1525 01:22:38,501 --> 01:22:40,001 -Home sweet home. -[machine beeps] 1526 01:22:48,668 --> 01:22:51,126 -There's a very reasonable explanation. -[cracking] 1527 01:22:57,459 --> 01:22:59,459 [chattering, laughing] 1528 01:22:59,543 --> 01:23:01,709 [Carol] I think he looks like a little politician. 1529 01:23:01,793 --> 01:23:03,834 -[Max] Mum, please. -[Katie] He looks like a politician. 1530 01:23:03,918 --> 01:23:07,293 [Abby] Part of it's the sweater vest. He does look like a politician. 1531 01:23:07,376 --> 01:23:09,918 -I like it. I actually like it. -Mum. 1532 01:23:10,001 --> 01:23:13,543 -I don't even know anything about… -Okay, everybody, time to eat. 1533 01:23:13,626 --> 01:23:15,543 Oh, this looks incredible. 1534 01:23:15,626 --> 01:23:18,751 Thank you so much, and the house looks so beautiful. 1535 01:23:18,834 --> 01:23:20,668 Oh, don't thank me. 1536 01:23:20,751 --> 01:23:21,876 Thank that creepy doll. 1537 01:23:21,959 --> 01:23:26,084 Selling that paid for everything. Our mortgage, our trip to Europe… 1538 01:23:26,168 --> 01:23:28,043 And your new chandelier. 1539 01:23:28,126 --> 01:23:30,376 -[Carol] Thank you. -And don't forget the drywall. 1540 01:23:30,459 --> 01:23:31,459 Oh, yeah. Well-- 1541 01:23:31,543 --> 01:23:34,543 I always thought the house could've done with a little remodeling anyway. So… 1542 01:23:34,626 --> 01:23:38,251 Keep it on those settings, Terry. All right. Take it easy. All right. Sorry. 1543 01:23:38,334 --> 01:23:40,334 Sorry, everybody. That was work. Apologies. 1544 01:23:40,418 --> 01:23:41,626 On Christmas Day? 1545 01:23:41,709 --> 01:23:45,376 Jeff has been promoted to District Manager. 1546 01:23:45,459 --> 01:23:47,751 There's no Christmas for the cloud, Mike. 1547 01:23:47,834 --> 01:23:49,293 The cloud never sleeps. 1548 01:23:49,376 --> 01:23:52,376 And I provide 24-7 cloud management services. And that includes-- 1549 01:23:52,459 --> 01:23:54,001 [clears throat] Dad. 1550 01:23:54,501 --> 01:23:55,626 Oh. 1551 01:23:55,709 --> 01:23:56,876 Let's make a toast. 1552 01:23:56,959 --> 01:24:00,043 -Yes. -Oh, um, can I get one of those? 1553 01:24:04,959 --> 01:24:07,084 You know, they're quite sugary. 1554 01:24:07,168 --> 01:24:08,834 I think we should let him have the soda. 1555 01:24:09,918 --> 01:24:11,668 Remember what happened last time? 1556 01:24:11,751 --> 01:24:13,418 [all laugh] 1557 01:24:15,959 --> 01:24:17,626 -There you go, buddy. -Thanks. 1558 01:24:17,709 --> 01:24:19,876 -Huh? Oh. [chuckles] -[all laugh] 1559 01:24:19,959 --> 01:24:21,126 Cheers. 1560 01:24:22,626 --> 01:24:23,918 To new friends. 1561 01:24:24,001 --> 01:24:26,043 -And family. -Mmm. 1562 01:24:26,126 --> 01:24:28,751 And me having no permanent neurological damage. 1563 01:24:28,834 --> 01:24:31,459 -[all laugh] -Yeah, that's good. 1564 01:24:31,543 --> 01:24:35,043 And here's to Max for bringing us all together. 1565 01:24:35,626 --> 01:24:36,793 Merry Christmas, everybody. 1566 01:24:36,876 --> 01:24:38,668 -Merry Christmas! -[Mike] Cheers. 1567 01:24:38,751 --> 01:24:41,043 -[Carol] Merry Christmas, darling. -[chattering] 1568 01:24:41,126 --> 01:24:42,459 Merry Christmas. Cheers, darling. 1569 01:24:43,584 --> 01:24:46,251 -[Jeff] Merry Christmas, everyone! -[glasses clinking]