1 00:00:07,791 --> 00:00:09,500 [doorbell rings] 2 00:00:09,583 --> 00:00:11,583 [triumphant music playing] 3 00:00:11,666 --> 00:00:12,625 Ahh! 4 00:00:12,708 --> 00:00:14,375 -Simon! -Darling. 5 00:00:14,458 --> 00:00:16,416 You're finally here. 6 00:00:16,500 --> 00:00:19,166 I've been looking forward to this weekend for so long. 7 00:00:19,250 --> 00:00:20,333 Me too. 8 00:00:20,416 --> 00:00:21,916 Oh, and I got you a gift. 9 00:00:22,000 --> 00:00:24,791 [gasps] I had a feeling you were gonna get me that, 10 00:00:24,875 --> 00:00:26,791 so I got you somewhere to put it. 11 00:00:26,875 --> 00:00:28,583 -Oh, Walty. -Oh! 12 00:00:28,666 --> 00:00:30,708 Yes, unwrap me! 13 00:00:30,791 --> 00:00:32,708 I adore making love in a bubble bath. 14 00:00:32,791 --> 00:00:36,791 -It's so dirty. -And yet so clean. 15 00:00:36,875 --> 00:00:38,166 Oh, Simon! 16 00:00:38,250 --> 00:00:40,833 I can't believe we're having sex everywhere but your bedroom. 17 00:00:40,916 --> 00:00:45,250 Ooh, let's do it in the shared laundry room next. 18 00:00:45,333 --> 00:00:46,625 [moaning] 19 00:00:46,708 --> 00:00:48,541 Uh, hey, are you wearing my sweater? 20 00:00:48,625 --> 00:00:51,791 You're not supposed to leave your laundry unattended. 21 00:00:51,875 --> 00:00:56,250 I can't believe we've been making love for 48 hours. 22 00:00:56,333 --> 00:00:58,916 I can't believe you can Postmates a chocolate fountain. 23 00:00:59,000 --> 00:01:02,666 Yeah, it's very romantic. And convenient. 24 00:01:02,750 --> 00:01:05,125 Hey, Walter, what's going on in that noggin? 25 00:01:05,208 --> 00:01:10,125 It's just the weekend's almost over, and long distance is so hard. 26 00:01:10,208 --> 00:01:12,541 I… I wish you didn't have to go. 27 00:01:12,625 --> 00:01:15,083 -Well, what if I didn't? -What do you mean? 28 00:01:15,166 --> 00:01:18,500 Well, humans in New Zealand have socialized sex, 29 00:01:18,583 --> 00:01:21,541 so Hormone Monsters are basically redundant. 30 00:01:21,625 --> 00:01:23,916 -Really? -And I could use a change of scenery. 31 00:01:24,000 --> 00:01:25,250 -So you'd move here? -Yeah. 32 00:01:25,333 --> 00:01:26,333 -Relocate? -Gladly. 33 00:01:26,416 --> 00:01:28,500 Change your address to my address? 34 00:01:28,583 --> 00:01:31,791 Why not? Who wouldn't want to feel this happy all the time? 35 00:01:31,875 --> 00:01:35,083 Holy shit! I've wanted this for so long. 36 00:01:35,166 --> 00:01:36,375 We're gonna be a real couple, 37 00:01:36,458 --> 00:01:38,333 like Mickey the Mouse and Minnie the Mouse. 38 00:01:38,416 --> 00:01:42,125 Now, baby, let's go back to the laundry room and get goofy. 39 00:01:42,208 --> 00:01:44,416 -[moans] -Oh, Simon. 40 00:01:44,500 --> 00:01:46,083 -Ohh-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo! -[Simon moans] 41 00:01:46,166 --> 00:01:48,083 ♪ That's just the way you make me feel ♪ 42 00:01:48,166 --> 00:01:50,416 ♪ That's just the way you make me feel ♪ 43 00:01:50,500 --> 00:01:53,916 -♪ That's just the way you make me feel ♪ -♪ That's just the way you make me feel ♪ 44 00:01:54,000 --> 00:01:56,625 ♪ A-ha So good, so good, so fuckin' real ♪ 45 00:01:56,708 --> 00:01:58,791 -♪ So good, so good, so fuckin' real ♪ -♪ A-ha ♪ 46 00:01:58,875 --> 00:02:00,666 ♪ That's just the way you make me feel ♪ 47 00:02:00,750 --> 00:02:02,875 ♪ That's just the way you make me feel ♪ 48 00:02:02,958 --> 00:02:08,000 ♪ It's like I'm powerful With a little bit of tender ♪ 49 00:02:08,083 --> 00:02:12,166 ♪ An emotional, sexual bender ♪ 50 00:02:12,250 --> 00:02:16,458 ♪ Mess me up, yeah But no one does it better ♪ 51 00:02:16,541 --> 00:02:18,583 ♪ There's nothing better ♪ 52 00:02:18,666 --> 00:02:20,875 ♪ That's just the way you make me feel ♪ 53 00:02:23,125 --> 00:02:25,666 Paul, we are killing it. 54 00:02:25,750 --> 00:02:28,916 I've got a new hubby, and you've got a new hobby. 55 00:02:29,000 --> 00:02:31,041 Yeah, I even got it over the net this time. 56 00:02:31,125 --> 00:02:33,416 And the teacher seemed less mad at me, right? 57 00:02:33,500 --> 00:02:38,291 And I'm loving your hairy legs in these itty-bitty tennis shorts. 58 00:02:38,375 --> 00:02:41,000 Yeah, I-I think they're the little alligator brand. 59 00:02:41,083 --> 00:02:41,958 Aww! 60 00:02:42,041 --> 00:02:44,625 Those are from CVS and that is a snail. 61 00:02:44,708 --> 00:02:47,166 -But go off, honey. -[woman grunts] 62 00:02:47,875 --> 00:02:48,875 -[grunts] -Oh! 63 00:02:48,958 --> 00:02:50,208 She's good. 64 00:02:50,875 --> 00:02:51,958 -[grunts] -Hmm. 65 00:02:52,041 --> 00:02:53,583 -[woman] Paul! Paul! -Oh. 66 00:02:53,666 --> 00:02:55,083 -Paul? -Paul! 67 00:02:55,166 --> 00:02:56,708 My name is Paul. 68 00:02:56,791 --> 00:03:00,500 I feel kinda weird. Like I drank soda too fast. 69 00:03:00,583 --> 00:03:03,291 It's called getting horny. 70 00:03:03,375 --> 00:03:04,750 Maury? Is that you? 71 00:03:04,833 --> 00:03:07,458 Paul, you old scamp, I haven't seen you in forever. 72 00:03:07,541 --> 00:03:09,083 How are we fucking Evelyn tonight? 73 00:03:09,166 --> 00:03:13,125 For the love of God, Maury, read your client's files. 74 00:03:13,208 --> 00:03:14,958 Evelyn passed away last year. 75 00:03:15,041 --> 00:03:17,000 -Yikes. My condolences. -Ugh. 76 00:03:17,083 --> 00:03:18,708 But, uh, congrats on being horny. 77 00:03:18,791 --> 00:03:21,875 That's nice. That's good for you, right? It's good to-- It's fun to be hard. 78 00:03:21,958 --> 00:03:25,833 Oh, I guess I am rather aroused. Is-- Is that okay? 79 00:03:25,916 --> 00:03:27,708 It is most certainly not okay. 80 00:03:27,791 --> 00:03:30,333 Yeah, that's right. Your wife's corpse is still warm. 81 00:03:30,416 --> 00:03:31,333 Oh God. 82 00:03:31,416 --> 00:03:35,166 And your wrinkly old balls are dripping out of your snail shorts. 83 00:03:35,250 --> 00:03:36,125 Oh, come on! 84 00:03:36,208 --> 00:03:39,833 What? His whole situation looks like a sad turkey. 85 00:03:39,916 --> 00:03:43,333 Hey, just because he's old and gross, doesn't mean he can't be horny. 86 00:03:43,416 --> 00:03:46,416 -Uh, thank you? -And what are you even doing here? 87 00:03:46,500 --> 00:03:47,708 I'm his protégé. 88 00:03:47,791 --> 00:03:51,791 Yes, they're shadowing me, so that I might mold them in my image. 89 00:03:51,875 --> 00:03:55,583 -Eww! -Montel is the clay and I, the potter. 90 00:03:55,666 --> 00:03:58,541 -[retches] Stop it, please. -Everybody, shut it. 91 00:03:58,625 --> 00:04:01,708 Paul has grieved, and now his penis is erect, 92 00:04:01,791 --> 00:04:06,375 so let's all work together to figure out what to do with this boner, okay? 93 00:04:06,458 --> 00:04:10,000 He could stick it in the ground with his dead wife. 94 00:04:10,083 --> 00:04:13,666 [laughs] Oh, Montel, you sure "served" him. 95 00:04:13,750 --> 00:04:15,083 Oh, for fuck's sake. 96 00:04:15,166 --> 00:04:18,291 Well, the good news is I'm not erect anymore. 97 00:04:18,375 --> 00:04:20,250 No, that's terrible news. 98 00:04:20,333 --> 00:04:22,583 We want you like the Saturday crossword. 99 00:04:22,666 --> 00:04:24,416 Always hard. 100 00:04:24,500 --> 00:04:25,750 [keyboard clacking] 101 00:04:25,833 --> 00:04:29,125 -Ugh, troubled sigh. -Something wrong, Emmy? 102 00:04:29,208 --> 00:04:32,083 Well, if you must know, it's my client, Sarah. 103 00:04:32,166 --> 00:04:34,958 -She's totally ignoring me. -Well, I'm sure that brings her peace. 104 00:04:35,041 --> 00:04:39,000 Ever since I asked her about her mother, she and Van have been shutting me out. 105 00:04:39,083 --> 00:04:41,375 And Van built a wall around her. 106 00:04:41,458 --> 00:04:44,750 A wall, wow. That's something I wish my cubicle had. 107 00:04:44,833 --> 00:04:46,791 Pete, help me. 108 00:04:46,875 --> 00:04:50,333 [sighs] Okay, I give up. What's the deal with Sarah's mom? 109 00:04:50,416 --> 00:04:52,458 I don't know. I mean, she won't say. 110 00:04:52,541 --> 00:04:54,583 And I assume you already tried the Memory Bank? 111 00:04:54,666 --> 00:04:58,541 [mockingly] No, I didn't try the Memory Bank. 112 00:04:58,625 --> 00:04:59,750 Why are you mad at me? 113 00:04:59,833 --> 00:05:04,875 Because it's a good idea, and I don't wanna do it. 114 00:05:04,958 --> 00:05:09,166 Ugh! Emmy! Now my outgoing is mixed with my incoming. 115 00:05:09,250 --> 00:05:11,708 All right, time for my three-o'clock yogurt, 116 00:05:11,791 --> 00:05:13,208 the bridge to dinner. 117 00:05:13,291 --> 00:05:17,250 [gasps] Hold on now. My special yogurt, it's not in its special place. 118 00:05:17,333 --> 00:05:18,208 [groans] 119 00:05:18,291 --> 00:05:21,916 How am I to get an old man hard on an empty stomach? 120 00:05:22,541 --> 00:05:25,333 I'm telling you, Walter, it's a good suggestion. 121 00:05:25,416 --> 00:05:26,708 I'm so sorry I'm late. 122 00:05:26,791 --> 00:05:30,041 I just got some very disturbing news right before I walked in here. 123 00:05:30,125 --> 00:05:33,666 Uh-huh. Well, your child and Lionel were just suggesting 124 00:05:33,750 --> 00:05:37,875 that maybe Paul should lop off his penis and throw it into an incinerator. 125 00:05:37,958 --> 00:05:39,375 The incinerator was my idea. 126 00:05:39,458 --> 00:05:41,291 What? We're not gonna incinerate it. 127 00:05:41,375 --> 00:05:44,833 We're gonna take pictures of it. Put it on the apps. Make it a star. 128 00:05:44,916 --> 00:05:47,791 Okay, I love where your head's at, Maury, 129 00:05:47,875 --> 00:05:51,291 but maybe instead of dick pics, we try online dating? 130 00:05:51,375 --> 00:05:54,083 I think we're saying the same thing, but sure, yeah. 131 00:05:54,166 --> 00:05:56,458 -Online dating? -Paul's gonna get catfished. 132 00:05:56,541 --> 00:05:59,458 What if he ends up in a shipping container with no kidneys? 133 00:05:59,541 --> 00:06:02,041 No, no, no, no, no. He's gonna meet new people, 134 00:06:02,125 --> 00:06:03,416 and it'll be great. 135 00:06:03,500 --> 00:06:06,791 Yeah. He's gonna fuck new people, and it'll be anal. 136 00:06:06,875 --> 00:06:08,666 It's not gonna be great or anal. 137 00:06:08,750 --> 00:06:11,750 -It's gonna be awkward. -And terrifying. 138 00:06:11,833 --> 00:06:14,125 Also, his body is weird now. 139 00:06:14,208 --> 00:06:17,708 Indeed, nobody wants to fornicate with a clammy old man. 140 00:06:17,791 --> 00:06:20,125 Wrong. Old people sex is the best. 141 00:06:20,208 --> 00:06:21,625 You already know what you're doing, 142 00:06:21,708 --> 00:06:25,333 and everyone's skin is so loose, it's way easier to eat ass. 143 00:06:25,416 --> 00:06:27,250 No, thank you. I'll stick to my yogurt. 144 00:06:27,333 --> 00:06:29,666 Whoa, whoa, whoa. Stop the clock. Is that my yogurt? 145 00:06:29,750 --> 00:06:34,000 Well, it wasn't labeled, you see. I assumed it was up for grabs. 146 00:06:34,083 --> 00:06:37,833 What? Nothing in an office fridge is "up for grabs." That would be weird. 147 00:06:37,916 --> 00:06:39,125 Oh, relax, Mama Maury. 148 00:06:39,208 --> 00:06:41,708 -That's a weird thing to say. -It's just a yogurt. 149 00:06:41,791 --> 00:06:43,583 What a weird fucking guy. 150 00:06:43,666 --> 00:06:46,166 All right, we're all a little on edge here, 151 00:06:46,250 --> 00:06:47,958 but let's just calm down, 152 00:06:48,041 --> 00:06:51,666 do the online dating thing, and never talk about yogurt again. 153 00:06:51,750 --> 00:06:53,625 It's actually quite delicious. 154 00:06:53,708 --> 00:06:56,291 -Here you go, Montel. Open wide. -Mmm! 155 00:06:56,375 --> 00:06:57,541 Oh, boysenberry. 156 00:06:57,625 --> 00:07:01,916 Okay, I'm not gonna sit here and watch you feed my child my yogurt. 157 00:07:02,000 --> 00:07:04,916 And you better believe I'm gonna slam this door. 158 00:07:05,000 --> 00:07:06,416 -[slams] -Damn it, guys. 159 00:07:06,500 --> 00:07:08,833 Now I don't even remember what we were talking about. 160 00:07:08,916 --> 00:07:11,125 Oh, Paul's old, weird body. 161 00:07:11,208 --> 00:07:12,541 [amusing music playing] 162 00:07:12,625 --> 00:07:14,708 Honey, I'm home. 163 00:07:14,791 --> 00:07:18,083 [giggles] Oh my God, I've always wanted to say that. 164 00:07:18,166 --> 00:07:19,916 And I've always wanted to hear it. 165 00:07:20,000 --> 00:07:20,916 [kissing, moaning] 166 00:07:21,000 --> 00:07:26,791 Uh, Simon, honey, did you eat hot chili out of my grandmother's china? 167 00:07:26,875 --> 00:07:30,208 Yes. It had paintings of trees on it, and I could not resist. 168 00:07:30,291 --> 00:07:32,500 -Is that okay, baby? -Oh, of course. 169 00:07:32,583 --> 00:07:33,750 [chuckles] It's just a bowl. 170 00:07:33,833 --> 00:07:36,458 An irreplaceable antique bowl that I'm not obsessed with in any way. 171 00:07:36,541 --> 00:07:37,500 Marvelous. 172 00:07:37,583 --> 00:07:41,500 Now, let's have wet and wild sex on your suede couch. 173 00:07:41,583 --> 00:07:42,666 Oh! [chuckles] 174 00:07:42,750 --> 00:07:44,166 Simon. 175 00:07:44,250 --> 00:07:46,166 -[kissing] -Oh! 176 00:07:46,250 --> 00:07:48,666 -[coughs] -Oh, sorry about my follicle leavings. 177 00:07:48,750 --> 00:07:51,208 It's, uh, my monthly pube shedding. 178 00:07:51,291 --> 00:07:54,583 Monthly? Oh dear, and it got in the chocolate fountain. 179 00:07:54,666 --> 00:07:56,291 Oh, yeah, I guess a little bit did. 180 00:07:56,375 --> 00:07:58,458 Well, I just won't look at it. 181 00:07:58,541 --> 00:08:00,791 I have the best night planned for us. 182 00:08:00,875 --> 00:08:02,333 I picked up some Thai food, 183 00:08:02,416 --> 00:08:05,875 and Bachelor in Paradise is about to start. 184 00:08:05,958 --> 00:08:08,625 -[sighs] -Ooh, I don't watch human television. 185 00:08:08,708 --> 00:08:10,333 Oh my God. Why? 186 00:08:10,416 --> 00:08:12,958 Well, I suppose because their shows are utter garbage. 187 00:08:13,041 --> 00:08:16,250 -What? -Uh, I just find them to be cringe. 188 00:08:16,333 --> 00:08:17,666 -Cringe? -Cringe. 189 00:08:17,750 --> 00:08:19,166 -Cringe? -Yeah, it's just cringe. 190 00:08:19,250 --> 00:08:22,083 -Does that mean you don't like it? -Maybe you just record it. 191 00:08:22,166 --> 00:08:26,250 Mmm, but if I don't watch it live, I can't participate in the group chat, 192 00:08:26,333 --> 00:08:28,000 and I'm really funny in there. 193 00:08:28,083 --> 00:08:30,250 But, baby, I put on my sexy T-shirt. 194 00:08:30,333 --> 00:08:34,125 [gasps] It is your sexy T-shirt. It says so right there. 195 00:08:34,208 --> 00:08:37,208 -Hey, now, what's going on in that noggin? -Nothing. 196 00:08:37,291 --> 00:08:39,166 Nothing. Let's… [inhales] 197 00:08:39,250 --> 00:08:42,166 …skip the show and have soul-shattering sex again. 198 00:08:42,250 --> 00:08:44,291 -Outstanding. -[kissing] 199 00:08:45,083 --> 00:08:46,333 -[sighs] -[phone chimes] 200 00:08:46,416 --> 00:08:48,250 Cassie fell off a boat? 201 00:08:48,333 --> 00:08:50,875 Shit. I got jokes for that. 202 00:08:50,958 --> 00:08:51,875 [Paul] "Widowr." 203 00:08:51,958 --> 00:08:57,416 "The app for people of a certain age, dating in their final stage of life." 204 00:08:57,500 --> 00:09:00,166 Oh, that's you! You're almost dead. 205 00:09:00,250 --> 00:09:01,708 Indeed! Ha ha! 206 00:09:01,791 --> 00:09:04,250 No, not "ha ha." What's the first question, Paul? 207 00:09:04,333 --> 00:09:07,666 Well, the thing wants to know what's my best feature? 208 00:09:07,750 --> 00:09:09,041 Your high cholesterol? 209 00:09:09,125 --> 00:09:11,000 Your, uh, decomposing wife? 210 00:09:11,083 --> 00:09:13,416 No. It's your sweet hog. Your dong. 211 00:09:13,500 --> 00:09:14,875 Your five-dollar footlong, 212 00:09:14,958 --> 00:09:17,375 packed with ham and turkey and shaved-up lettuce. 213 00:09:17,458 --> 00:09:18,750 I'm sorry. What? 214 00:09:18,833 --> 00:09:22,708 I'm hungry because someone stole my three-o'clock yogurt. 215 00:09:22,791 --> 00:09:24,333 Wasn't labeled. 216 00:09:24,416 --> 00:09:26,375 All right, all right, all right. How about this? 217 00:09:26,458 --> 00:09:32,083 "I'm a six-foot-tall man, and I am looking for a lady." 218 00:09:32,166 --> 00:09:34,083 -[phone chimes] -Holy moly! 219 00:09:34,166 --> 00:09:36,333 -I already got a match! -Whoo-hoo-hoo! 220 00:09:36,416 --> 00:09:38,541 -All right, Paulie! You got a date. -Yes! 221 00:09:38,625 --> 00:09:40,666 It's so fuckin' easy for tall guys. 222 00:09:41,541 --> 00:09:43,083 Hi. Um… 223 00:09:43,166 --> 00:09:46,500 Welcome to the Memory Bank, where you can always bank on us. 224 00:09:46,583 --> 00:09:48,041 Aw, that's cute. I need-- 225 00:09:48,125 --> 00:09:51,041 Scan your badge. The memories are through there. We close at six. 226 00:09:51,125 --> 00:09:54,500 Oh, well, actually, I've never been here alone, 227 00:09:54,583 --> 00:09:56,916 so could you maybe find the stuff I'm looking for, 228 00:09:57,000 --> 00:09:59,000 and I'll wait here and play on my phone? [chuckles] 229 00:09:59,083 --> 00:10:00,166 Also, do you have a charger? 230 00:10:00,250 --> 00:10:05,250 Young lady, I am quite busy keeping track of every memory in the history of forever. 231 00:10:05,333 --> 00:10:06,166 But do-- 232 00:10:06,250 --> 00:10:10,250 Simply say the memory you're looking for, and walk through a door. 233 00:10:10,333 --> 00:10:13,375 If you're not a complete imbecile, it should be there. 234 00:10:13,458 --> 00:10:16,916 Okay, um… Sarah's past. Woo! 235 00:10:17,000 --> 00:10:19,583 Oh, stop that. Just open it. 236 00:10:19,666 --> 00:10:21,666 All right, all right. 237 00:10:21,750 --> 00:10:22,791 [magical music playing] 238 00:10:22,875 --> 00:10:25,958 Yeah, I hope it isn't weird that I used to fuck a lot of these dogs. 239 00:10:26,041 --> 00:10:28,583 Damn, this one's way too recent. Um… 240 00:10:28,666 --> 00:10:30,958 Younger Sarah! 241 00:10:31,458 --> 00:10:33,250 Oh, good. I had to pee anyway. 242 00:10:33,333 --> 00:10:36,708 Yeah, my favorite classic rock band is Vampire Weekend. 243 00:10:36,791 --> 00:10:40,708 Aw, look at you, in your cute little emo phase. 244 00:10:40,791 --> 00:10:42,875 But I need to see you with your mom. 245 00:10:42,958 --> 00:10:45,583 Sarah's mom memories! 246 00:10:46,666 --> 00:10:49,000 Ooh, fun! Spin cycle. 247 00:10:49,083 --> 00:10:50,875 Whoa! 248 00:10:50,958 --> 00:10:53,666 What the fuck? Where am I? 249 00:10:53,750 --> 00:10:54,916 Um… 250 00:10:55,000 --> 00:10:56,458 Sarah's mom big fight. 251 00:10:56,541 --> 00:10:57,708 -[buzzer rings] -Hmm. 252 00:10:57,791 --> 00:11:00,416 Um, mom plus bitch plus Sarah? 253 00:11:00,500 --> 00:11:01,875 -[buzzer rings] -Ugh! 254 00:11:01,958 --> 00:11:05,833 Mr. Memory Banker, sir? Your bank sucks dick. 255 00:11:05,916 --> 00:11:09,000 My bank most certainly does not "suck dick." 256 00:11:09,083 --> 00:11:10,666 Oh my God. Can you feel this? 257 00:11:10,750 --> 00:11:12,666 Ohh, my face! My brain! 258 00:11:12,750 --> 00:11:14,666 Oh, shit! I-I'm so sorry. 259 00:11:14,750 --> 00:11:17,500 -I'm fine. It's hologram humor. -Oh. [chuckles] 260 00:11:17,583 --> 00:11:18,458 L-O-L. 261 00:11:18,541 --> 00:11:19,750 What do you need? 262 00:11:19,833 --> 00:11:23,875 There's a glitch. I-I keep asking for memories about Sarah's mom, 263 00:11:23,958 --> 00:11:25,750 but all I get is this empty void. 264 00:11:25,833 --> 00:11:29,291 That means the memories are buried. You'll need to dig. 265 00:11:29,375 --> 00:11:32,333 -[shovel thuds] -Oh, so, like, manual labor? 266 00:11:32,416 --> 00:11:34,583 Get on with it, we close at six. 267 00:11:34,666 --> 00:11:35,666 Come on! 268 00:11:35,750 --> 00:11:37,083 I mean, my arms are pretty, 269 00:11:37,166 --> 00:11:39,583 but I'll tell you, there's no muscles in there. 270 00:11:40,291 --> 00:11:41,250 Ugh! 271 00:11:41,333 --> 00:11:43,708 There's pubies in my Tumi. 272 00:11:43,791 --> 00:11:47,333 Oh yeah. Pretty exciting about you and Simon Sex. 273 00:11:47,416 --> 00:11:50,416 Yeah, he's a real catch and a thorough lover. 274 00:11:50,500 --> 00:11:51,958 You must be very excited. 275 00:11:52,041 --> 00:11:54,875 Yes, of course. So excited. 276 00:11:54,958 --> 00:11:58,666 But if I'm being honest, having Simon in my space all the time 277 00:11:58,750 --> 00:12:00,958 is a little different than him just visiting. 278 00:12:01,041 --> 00:12:03,208 -Hello, love. -Oh! Simon! 279 00:12:03,291 --> 00:12:06,375 [laughs] My boo. Yay! 280 00:12:06,458 --> 00:12:08,916 Well, I just finished my interview with Grace. 281 00:12:09,000 --> 00:12:11,000 And I'm gonna be honest. I nailed it. 282 00:12:11,083 --> 00:12:13,500 Right. The office transfer. 283 00:12:13,583 --> 00:12:17,125 You know, when it goes through, we'll be eating lunch together every day. 284 00:12:17,208 --> 00:12:19,708 Yes… [chuckles] …because in addition to living together, 285 00:12:19,791 --> 00:12:22,041 we will also be working together. 286 00:12:22,125 --> 00:12:24,208 Spending every waking moment together. 287 00:12:24,291 --> 00:12:27,250 Like Gilligan, and his husband, Mr. Skipper. 288 00:12:27,333 --> 00:12:29,791 We can even carpool. Just us two. 289 00:12:29,875 --> 00:12:31,958 Simon and Walter. Walter and Simon. 290 00:12:32,041 --> 00:12:34,375 Together forever, no interruptions. 291 00:12:34,458 --> 00:12:36,958 Hey, Walter, what's going on in that noggin? 292 00:12:37,041 --> 00:12:39,916 I, uh… Hoo, it's suddenly very hot in here. 293 00:12:40,000 --> 00:12:41,666 [Connie] Walter, baby. 294 00:12:41,750 --> 00:12:44,583 -You okay? -Yeah, what's going on in that noggin? 295 00:12:44,666 --> 00:12:47,583 -What the fuck? -Looks like you need a bubble bath. 296 00:12:47,666 --> 00:12:49,458 Ahh! I-- I gotta go. 297 00:12:49,541 --> 00:12:51,250 -Ah! [gasps] -What's going on in that noggin? 298 00:12:51,333 --> 00:12:53,750 -What's going on in that noggin? -[panting] 299 00:12:53,833 --> 00:12:56,083 -Ahh! -What's going on in that noggin? 300 00:12:56,166 --> 00:12:59,625 Stop it, all of you! Leave me alone! 301 00:12:59,708 --> 00:13:01,666 [screams] 302 00:13:01,750 --> 00:13:04,291 -Die! Die! Die! Die! -What's going on in that noggin? 303 00:13:04,375 --> 00:13:05,458 Die! 304 00:13:05,541 --> 00:13:08,916 Darling, you've completely destroyed your luxury lunch bag. 305 00:13:09,000 --> 00:13:13,500 -What's going on in that noggin? -Nothing. Just blowing off some steam. 306 00:13:13,583 --> 00:13:16,208 You know me. I love to stab to relax. 307 00:13:16,291 --> 00:13:20,125 Same. The blade in your hand is so soothing. 308 00:13:20,208 --> 00:13:21,708 Yeah, stabbing's nice. 309 00:13:21,791 --> 00:13:24,958 -Hello, Maurice. -What the hell do you two want? 310 00:13:25,041 --> 00:13:28,416 Montel explained that consuming unlabeled food 311 00:13:28,500 --> 00:13:29,833 is bad fridge etiquette, 312 00:13:29,916 --> 00:13:33,416 so I got you these yogurts to replace the one I ate. 313 00:13:33,500 --> 00:13:36,583 No! Fuck off! Those aren't even the right ones. 314 00:13:36,666 --> 00:13:41,083 Come on, now. I want my daddy and my idol to get along. 315 00:13:41,166 --> 00:13:44,958 Whoa, whoa, I thought he was your mentor. Idol seems much bigger than mentor. 316 00:13:45,041 --> 00:13:47,458 I mean, well, what do you call someone you worship 317 00:13:47,541 --> 00:13:50,041 and ultimately wanna be exactly like? 318 00:13:50,125 --> 00:13:52,875 -Me. You should wanna be like me. -[dish shatters] 319 00:13:52,958 --> 00:13:54,583 Well, it seems Montel has spoken. 320 00:13:54,666 --> 00:13:59,541 I am their idol, and they want you and their idol, which is me, to get along. 321 00:13:59,625 --> 00:14:01,875 -So what do you say? -I say… 322 00:14:01,958 --> 00:14:04,916 -Fuck your yogurt, shitty wizard bitch. -[all gasping] 323 00:14:05,000 --> 00:14:07,125 Very mature, Dad. 324 00:14:07,208 --> 00:14:09,625 -Now, Maury-- -Don't "Now, Maury" me. 325 00:14:09,708 --> 00:14:11,833 He thinks I want his stupid apology yogurt? 326 00:14:11,916 --> 00:14:15,000 Is it possible this isn't about the yogurt at all, 327 00:14:15,083 --> 00:14:17,625 but really about Lionel stealing your child? 328 00:14:17,708 --> 00:14:21,000 You sound so fucking stupid right now, Connie. 329 00:14:21,083 --> 00:14:21,916 Okay. 330 00:14:22,000 --> 00:14:23,833 This is about my yogurt, 331 00:14:23,916 --> 00:14:27,625 and giving an old man a big fat bone-dog, okay? [grunts] 332 00:14:27,708 --> 00:14:29,375 Fucking Lionel! 333 00:14:29,458 --> 00:14:32,083 Yes, Simon, you can adjust the thermostat. 334 00:14:32,166 --> 00:14:34,041 Sixty-nine degrees is fine. 335 00:14:34,125 --> 00:14:36,416 -Yes, I get it. -[clears throat] 336 00:14:36,500 --> 00:14:38,333 -I, uh, I gotta go. -[Simon] Walter, my l-- 337 00:14:38,416 --> 00:14:40,166 Hey, Grace, what's up? 338 00:14:40,250 --> 00:14:43,083 I'm here for Simon's recommendation for his transfer. 339 00:14:43,166 --> 00:14:45,833 But if it's a bad time, we still have to do it. 340 00:14:45,916 --> 00:14:48,666 Yes, of course. His transfer. 341 00:14:48,750 --> 00:14:51,041 This is really just a formality, 342 00:14:51,125 --> 00:14:54,333 so just give me your A-okay, and I'll stamp the paperwork. 343 00:14:54,416 --> 00:14:56,041 My A-okay? 344 00:14:56,125 --> 00:15:00,250 We'll be together always. Cringe. At home and at work. Cringe. 345 00:15:00,333 --> 00:15:03,791 Your days of reality television are over. Cringe. 346 00:15:03,875 --> 00:15:05,333 Cringe! Cringe! 347 00:15:05,416 --> 00:15:06,500 He's an embezzler. 348 00:15:06,583 --> 00:15:07,625 An embezzler? 349 00:15:07,708 --> 00:15:13,250 Yes. A thief. A stealer. He steals. Company money specifically. 350 00:15:13,333 --> 00:15:14,541 -And then he hides it. -Really? 351 00:15:14,625 --> 00:15:17,541 In his defense, it is to pay for needle drugs. 352 00:15:17,625 --> 00:15:18,458 Jesus! 353 00:15:18,541 --> 00:15:22,583 -So, do you need anything else? -No, I don't think so. 354 00:15:22,666 --> 00:15:25,791 Well, arson too, if you need it. 355 00:15:25,875 --> 00:15:27,625 -[shovel clangs] -[grunting] 356 00:15:27,708 --> 00:15:28,791 [Emmy] Jesus, Sarah, 357 00:15:28,875 --> 00:15:31,916 why'd you bury these memories so deep? 358 00:15:32,000 --> 00:15:33,291 -[shovel clangs] -Ooh! 359 00:15:33,375 --> 00:15:37,083 [speaking like a pirate] Me thinks me found me buried treasure. [laughs] 360 00:15:37,166 --> 00:15:39,666 -[rumble] -[screams] 361 00:15:40,625 --> 00:15:42,000 Wait, wait, wait! Whoa. 362 00:15:42,083 --> 00:15:43,041 Make a wish. 363 00:15:43,125 --> 00:15:45,250 -[laughs] -Oh! That must be the mom. 364 00:15:45,333 --> 00:15:46,958 Shh. Don't tell your dad. 365 00:15:47,041 --> 00:15:48,166 Best mom ever. 366 00:15:48,250 --> 00:15:50,916 -Where do I look? Cheese. -Mom, no, just smile. 367 00:15:51,000 --> 00:15:52,333 [both giggle] 368 00:15:52,416 --> 00:15:53,916 We look ridiculous. 369 00:15:54,000 --> 00:15:56,000 What's Sarah's problem with her? 370 00:15:56,083 --> 00:16:00,958 The doctor says, with chemo and radiation, I should make a full recovery. 371 00:16:01,041 --> 00:16:02,041 Okay. Promise? 372 00:16:02,125 --> 00:16:03,833 Hun, we gotta trust the doctor. 373 00:16:03,916 --> 00:16:06,500 She's right. I've got a good feeling about this. 374 00:16:06,583 --> 00:16:08,333 Oh no. I kinda don't. 375 00:16:08,416 --> 00:16:11,000 Yeah, we're gonna try another kind of chemo, 376 00:16:11,083 --> 00:16:13,500 and they feel really hopeful about it. 377 00:16:13,583 --> 00:16:15,083 Well, that's-- that's good. 378 00:16:15,166 --> 00:16:17,125 And I'm sorry work's been so crazy, 379 00:16:17,208 --> 00:16:20,458 but I'm-- I'm gonna take the train up and I'm-- I'll see you soon, okay? 380 00:16:20,541 --> 00:16:21,458 I-I promise. 381 00:16:21,541 --> 00:16:23,000 Fuck work, see her now. 382 00:16:23,083 --> 00:16:26,875 I just, uh… I don't wanna see my mom in a hospital bed. 383 00:16:26,958 --> 00:16:29,125 [Emmy] No, no, you have to go in. 384 00:16:29,208 --> 00:16:31,208 Like with the tubes and everything. 385 00:16:31,291 --> 00:16:33,416 Hey, she wouldn't want you to see her like that. 386 00:16:33,500 --> 00:16:35,583 Yeah, it's okay. She'll be home in a couple of weeks. 387 00:16:35,666 --> 00:16:36,625 No, Sarah. 388 00:16:36,708 --> 00:16:39,791 Exactly. You don't have to put yourself through that right now. 389 00:16:39,875 --> 00:16:42,666 -You'll see her when she's home. -[Emmy] Wait. Don't leave! 390 00:16:42,750 --> 00:16:44,125 [electricity crackling] 391 00:16:44,208 --> 00:16:45,458 -[phone buzzes] -Hey, Dad. 392 00:16:45,541 --> 00:16:47,166 Um, yeah, can I call you back? 393 00:16:47,750 --> 00:16:51,041 What? No. No, no, no, that's not possible. 394 00:16:51,125 --> 00:16:53,333 No, she was supposed to come home next week. 395 00:16:53,416 --> 00:16:55,666 -Fuck. -No, no, no, no, no. 396 00:16:55,750 --> 00:16:57,375 No. What are you talking about? 397 00:16:57,458 --> 00:16:58,458 [Hope] Mmm. 398 00:16:58,541 --> 00:17:00,583 I am so sorry, baby. 399 00:17:01,583 --> 00:17:03,583 Whoa! Ow! 400 00:17:04,291 --> 00:17:05,458 [Sarah sobbing] 401 00:17:05,541 --> 00:17:07,083 Oh my God, Sarah. 402 00:17:07,791 --> 00:17:10,000 You never got to say goodbye. 403 00:17:10,083 --> 00:17:11,791 -[somber music plays] -[sighs] 404 00:17:14,000 --> 00:17:16,708 Oh, boy. Oh, boy. Why am I so nervous? 405 00:17:16,791 --> 00:17:18,875 It's just eating dinner. I do this every night. 406 00:17:18,958 --> 00:17:22,791 Yeah, but it's not every night you have Sexy Stranger for dessert. 407 00:17:22,875 --> 00:17:25,750 Paul, I don't want to alarm you, but if you get another boner in here, 408 00:17:25,833 --> 00:17:27,458 you will get MeToo'd, 409 00:17:27,541 --> 00:17:29,625 and you're too old to start jail. 410 00:17:29,708 --> 00:17:33,083 Oh my God, you're right. I-I don't think I can do this. 411 00:17:33,166 --> 00:17:35,708 Nor should you. Don't you agree, Evelyn? 412 00:17:35,791 --> 00:17:38,666 [in female voice] Who, me? His dead wife who he forgot? 413 00:17:38,750 --> 00:17:41,791 I'd rather he not have gross sex with a stranger. 414 00:17:41,875 --> 00:17:43,458 Paul, don't listen to them. I-- 415 00:17:43,541 --> 00:17:45,291 I know that kid. That's-- That's not Evelyn. 416 00:17:45,375 --> 00:17:46,833 Uh, Walter, what do you think? 417 00:17:46,916 --> 00:17:52,250 Um, well, I think sometimes it's completely okay to bail on a situation, 418 00:17:52,333 --> 00:17:55,666 even if you have to make up outrageous lies to, um, do so. 419 00:17:55,750 --> 00:17:57,958 -Yeah. You're right. I should bail. -Let's bail. 420 00:17:58,041 --> 00:18:00,625 Bailing feels good right now. Let's go. 421 00:18:00,708 --> 00:18:02,583 -Paul? Is that you? -[Tito] Oh, shit! 422 00:18:02,666 --> 00:18:05,125 -She's here! She's here! -Um… 423 00:18:05,208 --> 00:18:06,625 -Deb? -Were you just leaving? 424 00:18:06,708 --> 00:18:10,583 No, no, I-I was just stretching my back. 425 00:18:10,666 --> 00:18:11,958 Okay. 426 00:18:12,041 --> 00:18:14,375 I should probably stretch my back too. 427 00:18:14,458 --> 00:18:16,125 Oh, wait. I'm dead. 428 00:18:17,208 --> 00:18:19,833 -Uh, hey, guys. -Oh, hi, Emmy. 429 00:18:19,916 --> 00:18:22,166 Are you here for some more true-love bullshit? 430 00:18:22,250 --> 00:18:27,000 No, uh, actually, I-I just came to say I understand. 431 00:18:27,083 --> 00:18:30,291 Sarah, I dug a hole in your brain, and I get it now. 432 00:18:30,375 --> 00:18:33,625 -What are you talking about? -I found out about your mom. 433 00:18:33,708 --> 00:18:36,166 -Ugh. -That must've been so horrible. 434 00:18:36,250 --> 00:18:39,000 Of course it was horrible. She was my best friend. 435 00:18:39,083 --> 00:18:42,375 No, don't listen to her, Sarah. She's just trying to make you feel shitty. 436 00:18:42,458 --> 00:18:45,250 -You know what? Let's just get outta here. -Wait, no! 437 00:18:45,333 --> 00:18:47,083 I-I'm just trying to help. 438 00:18:47,166 --> 00:18:49,416 -Hi. I'm Paul. -Well, hi. 439 00:18:49,500 --> 00:18:52,250 -Welcome to dinner. -Nice to vigorously shake your hand. 440 00:18:52,333 --> 00:18:56,083 Ooh! A handshake, the doorknob to sex. 441 00:18:56,166 --> 00:18:58,541 Please rest your thighs. 442 00:18:58,625 --> 00:19:01,500 [chuckling] Yeah, sure. That's how humans talk. 443 00:19:01,583 --> 00:19:04,541 Okay, okay. A little host, I see. 444 00:19:04,625 --> 00:19:08,166 So, you are a woman in the world. [chuckles] 445 00:19:08,250 --> 00:19:11,125 This date is bad. You're a bad dater, Paul. 446 00:19:11,208 --> 00:19:13,625 Shit. Maybe-- Maybe we should've rehearsed this? 447 00:19:13,708 --> 00:19:17,250 I am a woman in the world, and you're a man, 448 00:19:17,333 --> 00:19:21,041 but that's about all I know since your profile was so mysterious. 449 00:19:21,125 --> 00:19:25,083 Ooh, you're a mystery, Paul. Tell her your balls are a clue. 450 00:19:25,166 --> 00:19:28,208 Don't talk about your balls. Ball talk is a one-way ticket to jail. 451 00:19:28,291 --> 00:19:29,791 Okay, everyone quiet! 452 00:19:29,875 --> 00:19:32,791 I'm sorry. [chuckles nervously] I'm a little nervous. 453 00:19:32,875 --> 00:19:35,125 I-I don't really know what to say. 454 00:19:35,208 --> 00:19:39,916 This is my, uh, first first date in 40 years. 455 00:19:40,000 --> 00:19:42,791 -Oh, Big Daddy Paul, I get it. -Wait. You do? 456 00:19:42,875 --> 00:19:44,291 -Of course. -Really? 457 00:19:44,375 --> 00:19:46,916 I was so nervous on my first first date, 458 00:19:47,000 --> 00:19:50,666 I ended up showing the guy pictures from my husband Robert's funeral. 459 00:19:50,750 --> 00:19:52,791 [chuckles] That's a relief! 460 00:19:52,875 --> 00:19:55,000 You know, I've actually been trying really hard 461 00:19:55,083 --> 00:19:57,875 not to say my dead wife's name since you got here. 462 00:19:57,958 --> 00:20:01,291 -Paul, you wanna say it real quick? -I do. It's Evelyn. Thank you. 463 00:20:01,375 --> 00:20:03,041 [chuckles] Feels good, huh? 464 00:20:03,125 --> 00:20:05,416 -[both chuckle] -Okay, this is actually very sweet. 465 00:20:05,500 --> 00:20:09,375 Now, order the meatballs, so you can see how wide her mouth goes. 466 00:20:09,458 --> 00:20:11,125 Sarah, please stop. 467 00:20:11,208 --> 00:20:13,041 I-- I know you're sad about your mom. 468 00:20:13,125 --> 00:20:15,166 Shut up! [grunts] 469 00:20:15,250 --> 00:20:17,375 What the fuck? You're throwing rocks at me now? 470 00:20:17,458 --> 00:20:18,708 You're so immature. 471 00:20:18,791 --> 00:20:19,833 Just go away. 472 00:20:19,916 --> 00:20:22,166 No, Sarah needs me. She needs her Lovebug. 473 00:20:22,250 --> 00:20:23,375 -Ugh. Move! -No! 474 00:20:23,458 --> 00:20:24,375 -Move! -No! 475 00:20:24,458 --> 00:20:25,625 -Sarah! -Tell her to stop. 476 00:20:25,708 --> 00:20:27,750 No, tell her to stop. 477 00:20:27,833 --> 00:20:29,541 -[laughter] -What the fuck? 478 00:20:30,625 --> 00:20:34,875 To Robert and Evelyn. May they not smite us from heaven. 479 00:20:34,958 --> 00:20:37,416 Evelyn might be, but Robert? I don't know if Robert's in heaven. 480 00:20:37,500 --> 00:20:38,750 -[door opens] -[both chuckle] 481 00:20:38,833 --> 00:20:39,916 -Dad? -Sarah. 482 00:20:40,000 --> 00:20:40,958 -[Emmy] Wait. -Sweetie. 483 00:20:41,041 --> 00:20:42,291 That's her dad? 484 00:20:42,375 --> 00:20:46,041 Yeah. [hiccups] His dead wife is her dead mom. 485 00:20:46,125 --> 00:20:48,125 Does nobody read the files? 486 00:20:48,208 --> 00:20:50,958 Hi. What-- What, uh… What are you doing here? 487 00:20:51,041 --> 00:20:53,125 What am I doing here? What are you doing here? 488 00:20:53,208 --> 00:20:56,333 Uh, well, I'm kind of, uh, on-- on a date. 489 00:20:56,416 --> 00:20:59,125 Oh, a date! Cool. 490 00:20:59,208 --> 00:21:02,958 Yeah, this is Deb. Uh, I met her on the Internet. 491 00:21:03,041 --> 00:21:06,083 -Well, that's fucking gross. -Oh, no she didn't! 492 00:21:06,166 --> 00:21:07,958 [chuckling] I actually think she did. 493 00:21:08,041 --> 00:21:09,250 I'm sorry, Internet lady. 494 00:21:09,333 --> 00:21:12,000 I'm sure you're probably… very nice, 495 00:21:12,083 --> 00:21:14,541 but, Dad, how could you do this to Mom? 496 00:21:14,625 --> 00:21:16,416 -Sarah. -I thought your wife was dead. 497 00:21:16,500 --> 00:21:19,291 She is, right? I've been duped before, I will not be duped again. 498 00:21:19,375 --> 00:21:21,833 I'm sorry, Deb. I-- I gotta handle this. 499 00:21:21,916 --> 00:21:23,333 Yeah, sure. 500 00:21:23,416 --> 00:21:26,458 Your profile didn't say you had kids either. 501 00:21:26,958 --> 00:21:29,833 -I can't believe-- I can't believe him. -Sarah, please stop. 502 00:21:29,916 --> 00:21:33,208 Ple-- Honey, it was never my intention to hurt you. 503 00:21:33,291 --> 00:21:36,708 Hurt? I'm not hurt, Dad. I'm pissed. Mom just died. 504 00:21:36,791 --> 00:21:39,541 -Oh, sweetie, it's been almost a year. -[scoffs] 505 00:21:39,625 --> 00:21:42,000 And I miss her every day. 506 00:21:42,083 --> 00:21:43,666 -I miss you too. -Don't do that. 507 00:21:43,750 --> 00:21:47,250 Now I call you and text you all the time, but you never respond. 508 00:21:47,333 --> 00:21:49,333 And, you know, I get it. I get it. 509 00:21:49,416 --> 00:21:52,458 You feel bad about everything with Mom. 510 00:21:52,541 --> 00:21:53,416 Please, just stop. 511 00:21:53,500 --> 00:21:56,875 No, no, your mom knew you wanted to be there, kiddo. 512 00:21:56,958 --> 00:21:59,000 I don't wanna talk about it, okay? 513 00:21:59,083 --> 00:22:01,208 So good for you. You're moving on. 514 00:22:01,291 --> 00:22:03,000 Have fun with your sexy new life. 515 00:22:03,083 --> 00:22:05,083 -Uh, no. Sarah, please. -Bye, Dad. 516 00:22:05,166 --> 00:22:07,708 -Nice work, Sarah. -What? No, it wasn't. 517 00:22:07,791 --> 00:22:09,333 Hey, Paul. 518 00:22:09,416 --> 00:22:11,583 This is a lot for a first date, 519 00:22:11,666 --> 00:22:14,875 so I gots to go, and we gots to go Dutch. 520 00:22:14,958 --> 00:22:17,250 Uh, yeah, yeah, okay. Sure. 521 00:22:17,333 --> 00:22:19,125 Ain't no man just gonna leave me with the bill. 522 00:22:19,208 --> 00:22:21,666 Nuh-uh, not this time. I joke, but I don't play. 523 00:22:21,750 --> 00:22:24,125 Not me, Mr. Tall Tennis Man. 524 00:22:24,208 --> 00:22:27,750 Sarah, go back and talk to him. He's your dad. He loves you. 525 00:22:27,833 --> 00:22:29,166 -Don't listen to her. -[sobs] 526 00:22:29,250 --> 00:22:32,791 She was wrong about Ben, she snuck her way into your memories-- 527 00:22:32,875 --> 00:22:35,833 Only because you guys wouldn't tell me about her mom. 528 00:22:35,916 --> 00:22:37,375 Stop talking about her. 529 00:22:37,458 --> 00:22:39,041 See? She's a shitty Lovebug. 530 00:22:39,125 --> 00:22:42,958 Okay, yeah, I am a shitty Lovebug sometimes. 531 00:22:43,041 --> 00:22:46,416 But I am good enough to know that you really loved your mom. 532 00:22:46,500 --> 00:22:49,166 -Jesus! She did it again. -Sarah, please. 533 00:22:49,250 --> 00:22:51,333 Just stay away from me, Emmy. Okay? I'm done. 534 00:22:51,416 --> 00:22:52,916 Done? What does that mean? 535 00:22:53,000 --> 00:22:54,750 -It means you're fired. -[dramatic music] 536 00:22:54,833 --> 00:22:58,291 -What? You can't do that. -Honey, I think she just did. 537 00:22:58,375 --> 00:22:59,666 But you need me. 538 00:22:59,750 --> 00:23:03,291 Oh, everything's a mess! 539 00:23:03,375 --> 00:23:07,083 This is what happens when you let people get too close. 540 00:23:07,166 --> 00:23:08,250 -Uh… -Sorry. 541 00:23:08,333 --> 00:23:10,250 I'm going through some personal stuff. 542 00:23:10,333 --> 00:23:11,833 [sighs] 543 00:23:12,833 --> 00:23:14,833 -Maurice? -Oh, hello, Lionel. 544 00:23:14,916 --> 00:23:16,833 What are you doing in my office? 545 00:23:16,916 --> 00:23:20,708 I realize I may have overreacted a little bit about the yogurt. 546 00:23:20,791 --> 00:23:24,208 -Yeah, I'll say. -And while you may be Montel's mentor-- 547 00:23:24,291 --> 00:23:25,875 -Idol. Thank you. -Whatever. 548 00:23:25,958 --> 00:23:30,041 I will always be their father, and you cannot take that away from me. 549 00:23:30,125 --> 00:23:31,583 Yes, well, if you say so. 550 00:23:31,666 --> 00:23:34,625 -And so, I am sorry. -Oh! 551 00:23:34,708 --> 00:23:37,958 Well, that's very, uh… that's very mature of you, Maurice. 552 00:23:38,041 --> 00:23:39,875 Yes, well, I'm very mature. 553 00:23:39,958 --> 00:23:42,833 And now, out of respect, I shall back out of your office, 554 00:23:42,916 --> 00:23:45,916 never showing my rear, clenching ever so tightly. 555 00:23:46,000 --> 00:23:47,333 Uh, hang on, Maurice. 556 00:23:47,416 --> 00:23:50,250 One of my Nazi dildos seems to be missing. 557 00:23:50,333 --> 00:23:51,291 Oh? 558 00:23:51,375 --> 00:23:54,750 Yes, Adolf Tickler, I believe. Di-- Did you-- 559 00:23:54,833 --> 00:23:58,250 What? Steal your favorite dildo and stick it up my ass? 560 00:23:58,333 --> 00:23:59,166 Yes. 561 00:23:59,250 --> 00:24:02,375 And then offer you a fake apology with said dildo still in my ass? 562 00:24:02,458 --> 00:24:03,666 -Precisely. -And then, what? 563 00:24:03,750 --> 00:24:08,666 Uh, proceed to walk out ass-backwards, leaving you none the wiser? 564 00:24:08,750 --> 00:24:11,708 I am the wiser. You obviously did all of that. 565 00:24:11,791 --> 00:24:15,125 Anyway, it's getting late, so toodle-oo. Gotta go. 566 00:24:15,208 --> 00:24:16,583 Oh, very good. 567 00:24:16,666 --> 00:24:20,416 Maurice, those are purely decorative, for display only! 568 00:24:20,500 --> 00:24:21,416 [sighs] 569 00:24:21,500 --> 00:24:23,000 It's worth nothing now. 570 00:24:23,083 --> 00:24:24,166 [playful music plays] 571 00:24:24,250 --> 00:24:27,166 Honey… [sighs] …I'm home. 572 00:24:27,250 --> 00:24:30,666 -Walter, we need to talk. -Oh, um, okay. 573 00:24:30,750 --> 00:24:34,000 So I just spoke with Grace, and, apparently, 574 00:24:34,083 --> 00:24:36,958 you gave me a very weird recommendation. 575 00:24:37,041 --> 00:24:40,125 What? No. You are so random. 576 00:24:40,208 --> 00:24:42,000 Now, I may be cuckoo bananas, 577 00:24:42,083 --> 00:24:44,791 but it seems like you don't really want me here. 578 00:24:44,875 --> 00:24:47,000 Oh, sweetie, that's not it. 579 00:24:47,083 --> 00:24:51,541 It's just that I worry if you stay, I'm going to kill you. 580 00:24:51,625 --> 00:24:55,708 Okay, but I don't wanna be with someone who wants to murder me. 581 00:24:55,791 --> 00:24:58,958 Not again, at least. It's a very stressful kink. 582 00:24:59,041 --> 00:25:01,708 Well, if it helps, I don't want to kill you. 583 00:25:01,791 --> 00:25:05,916 But having you all up in my space makes me, uh… cringe? 584 00:25:06,000 --> 00:25:07,083 Am I using it right? 585 00:25:07,166 --> 00:25:08,333 -You're not. -Shit. 586 00:25:08,416 --> 00:25:11,916 I'm just confused, Walter, because I thought this was what you wanted. 587 00:25:12,000 --> 00:25:13,541 I thought so too. 588 00:25:13,625 --> 00:25:17,833 I guess it's easier for me to do intimacy 48 hours at a time. 589 00:25:17,916 --> 00:25:22,208 You gotta let people in, Walter. And not just on the weekends. 590 00:25:22,291 --> 00:25:26,750 I know, but, for now, can we just go back to the way things were? 591 00:25:26,833 --> 00:25:28,708 I'm sorry. I can't. 592 00:25:28,791 --> 00:25:32,125 I only go backwards if I'm hiding a dildo up my ass. 593 00:25:32,208 --> 00:25:34,125 -[sighs] Yeah. That makes sense. -[sighs] 594 00:25:34,208 --> 00:25:36,958 And again, I'm sorry about all the pubies. 595 00:25:37,041 --> 00:25:39,000 I'm not used to cleaning up after myself. 596 00:25:39,083 --> 00:25:41,958 -Usually my butler does all that. -I'm sorry. Your butler? 597 00:25:42,041 --> 00:25:44,791 Oh, Walter, it's number eight, my favorite chopper. 598 00:25:44,875 --> 00:25:46,625 My pilot is so nice. 599 00:25:46,708 --> 00:25:48,541 Your pilot? Hold up. 600 00:25:48,625 --> 00:25:50,333 Wait, wait, wait. [chuckles] You rich? 601 00:25:50,416 --> 00:25:53,041 I'm gonna miss that noggin! 602 00:25:53,125 --> 00:25:55,708 Damn, I fucked up. He rich! 603 00:25:55,791 --> 00:25:57,708 ♪ My booty worth a billion ♪ 604 00:25:57,791 --> 00:25:59,666 ♪ My kisses worth a million ♪ 605 00:25:59,750 --> 00:26:01,375 ♪ My goodies worth a trillion ♪ 606 00:26:01,458 --> 00:26:03,458 ♪ So, bitch, I'm rich forever! ♪ 607 00:26:03,541 --> 00:26:05,375 ♪ My booty is a Louis ♪ 608 00:26:05,458 --> 00:26:07,291 ♪ My coochie is a Gucci ♪ 609 00:26:07,375 --> 00:26:09,000 ♪ My bawdy is so boujie ♪ 610 00:26:09,083 --> 00:26:11,375 ♪ So, bitch, I'm rich forever! ♪ 611 00:26:11,458 --> 00:26:15,250 ♪ I ain't got no car But, boy, I'll drive you crazy ♪ 612 00:26:15,333 --> 00:26:19,125 ♪ I don't need your heart Just keys to the Mercedes ♪ 613 00:26:19,208 --> 00:26:22,916 ♪ I can't give you cash Just ass pics on the daily ♪ 614 00:26:23,000 --> 00:26:26,291 ♪ You just gotta ask I'll be your sugar baby ♪ 615 00:26:26,375 --> 00:26:28,291 ♪ These abs, they six figures ♪ 616 00:26:28,375 --> 00:26:30,041 ♪ In Forbes for being fine ♪ 617 00:26:30,125 --> 00:26:31,916 ♪ They say "twerk," I work, bitch ♪ 618 00:26:32,000 --> 00:26:33,750 ♪ Like I signed a W-9 ♪ 619 00:26:33,833 --> 00:26:37,583 ♪ Why would I cook in the kitchen When my body's a whole meal? ♪ 620 00:26:37,666 --> 00:26:40,916 ♪ And when they ask me for my number I tell 'em-- ♪