1 00:00:06,000 --> 00:00:09,458 [automated voice] Now serving D46 at counter three. 2 00:00:09,541 --> 00:00:12,958 Now serving D46 at counter three. 3 00:00:13,041 --> 00:00:15,500 Ugh, the DMV fucking sucks. 4 00:00:15,583 --> 00:00:17,166 [chuckles] Totally, Van. 5 00:00:17,250 --> 00:00:20,541 What a hot and sexy take. Say more. 6 00:00:20,625 --> 00:00:22,166 What's up with you today? 7 00:00:22,250 --> 00:00:24,041 [laughing] Nothing-uh. 8 00:00:24,125 --> 00:00:28,583 I mean, Van is just, like, so fascinating. No? I-I think so. 9 00:00:28,666 --> 00:00:29,791 Take it easy, Emmy. 10 00:00:29,875 --> 00:00:33,750 -Oh, I'm very easy. Everybody knows it. -[phone chimes] 11 00:00:33,833 --> 00:00:37,333 -Ugh, it's Ben. -Ooh, it's Ben! The urinal guy! 12 00:00:37,416 --> 00:00:38,958 [Emmy] "You around tonight?" 13 00:00:39,041 --> 00:00:42,041 "Wanna martini emoji?" [laughs] 14 00:00:42,125 --> 00:00:43,833 All right, we need an excuse. 15 00:00:43,916 --> 00:00:47,000 You're out of town. You've got an aunt thing in Colorado. 16 00:00:47,083 --> 00:00:49,916 -Got it. "Aunt thing." -Wait. What's an "aunt thing"? 17 00:00:50,000 --> 00:00:52,958 No one knows. It sounds specific, but it conveys nothing. 18 00:00:53,041 --> 00:00:55,041 We've used it to bail on so many people. 19 00:00:55,125 --> 00:00:58,041 Yeah, no, no, it makes sense. Aunts are frail. 20 00:00:58,125 --> 00:01:01,250 Um, but couldn't we also just get the drink with Ben? 21 00:01:01,333 --> 00:01:02,208 Definitely not. 22 00:01:02,291 --> 00:01:05,500 But the dong did respectable work, and he was sweet. 23 00:01:05,583 --> 00:01:06,500 Mmm, nah. 24 00:01:06,583 --> 00:01:10,250 -Now serving D47 at counter nine. -Oh, that's me. Aunt thing sent. 25 00:01:10,333 --> 00:01:16,041 Cool. Uh, we'll just be here then. Uh, me and Van's exposed clavicle. 26 00:01:16,125 --> 00:01:17,500 [both chuckle] 27 00:01:17,583 --> 00:01:21,000 So, how have you been? Since the last time I… Since-- Since we-- 28 00:01:21,083 --> 00:01:23,500 -Since we kissed? -Kissed, yes kissed. 29 00:01:23,583 --> 00:01:24,833 We-- When we were kissing. 30 00:01:24,916 --> 00:01:27,083 I've been good. And kissing's fun. 31 00:01:27,166 --> 00:01:30,833 I must say, I do find you oddly compelling. 32 00:01:30,916 --> 00:01:36,125 And I find you to be the prettiest lady rock in the history of the world. 33 00:01:36,208 --> 00:01:37,708 But you're too into me, 34 00:01:37,791 --> 00:01:40,875 and I don't do your Lovebug relationship thingies. 35 00:01:40,958 --> 00:01:44,916 Well, that's cool, I'm not even interested in a relationship, bro. 36 00:01:45,000 --> 00:01:47,833 -Let's get married. -Absolutely. Let's do it in Santa Barbara. 37 00:01:47,916 --> 00:01:48,958 See? Too into me. 38 00:01:49,041 --> 00:01:51,875 [laughing] Okay, okay. We're not getting married. 39 00:01:51,958 --> 00:01:54,041 But, uh, can we still make out? 40 00:01:54,125 --> 00:01:56,708 We'll see. But right now I gotta go help Sarah. 41 00:01:56,791 --> 00:02:00,375 Okay, I'll be here, not wanting a relationship. 42 00:02:00,458 --> 00:02:04,083 Little do you know, I am such a good kisser, 43 00:02:04,166 --> 00:02:06,458 you will want to marry me. 44 00:02:06,541 --> 00:02:08,208 [cackles] Woo-woo! 45 00:02:08,291 --> 00:02:10,208 ♪ That's just the way you make me feel ♪ 46 00:02:10,291 --> 00:02:12,583 ♪ That's just the way you make me feel ♪ 47 00:02:12,666 --> 00:02:16,041 -♪ That's just the way you make me feel ♪ -♪ That's just the way you make me feel ♪ 48 00:02:16,125 --> 00:02:18,750 ♪ A-ha So good, so good, so fuckin' real ♪ 49 00:02:18,833 --> 00:02:20,916 -♪ So good, so good, so fuckin' real ♪ -♪ A-ha ♪ 50 00:02:21,000 --> 00:02:22,791 ♪ That's just the way you make me feel ♪ 51 00:02:22,875 --> 00:02:24,958 ♪ That's just the way you make me feel ♪ 52 00:02:25,041 --> 00:02:30,125 ♪ It's like I'm powerful With a little bit of tender ♪ 53 00:02:30,208 --> 00:02:34,291 ♪ An emotional, sexual bender ♪ 54 00:02:34,375 --> 00:02:38,708 ♪ Mess me up, yeah But no one does it better ♪ 55 00:02:38,791 --> 00:02:40,583 ♪ There's nothing better ♪ 56 00:02:40,666 --> 00:02:42,958 ♪ That's just the way you make me feel ♪ 57 00:02:44,875 --> 00:02:47,000 -First day. You nervous? -No. 58 00:02:47,083 --> 00:02:48,500 -Well, don't be. -I'm not. 59 00:02:48,583 --> 00:02:51,833 Good, because it's just an internship. It doesn't even count. 60 00:02:51,916 --> 00:02:54,500 I mean, it's like you're barely even a Shame Wizard. 61 00:02:54,583 --> 00:02:57,000 -I am too a Shame Wizard. -Okay, fine. 62 00:02:57,083 --> 00:02:59,500 -You said you'd respect my choice. -It's a bad choice though. 63 00:02:59,583 --> 00:03:00,875 -You promised. -I know. 64 00:03:00,958 --> 00:03:02,708 Hey! Shut the hell up! 65 00:03:02,791 --> 00:03:07,083 Montel, I think you're gonna be a lovely Shame Wizard. 66 00:03:07,166 --> 00:03:09,458 Thank you, Connie Mommy. You're my favorite. 67 00:03:09,541 --> 00:03:12,375 -Goes without saying. -"Goes without saying." Blech. 68 00:03:13,250 --> 00:03:15,000 -There they are. -[cheering] 69 00:03:15,083 --> 00:03:16,750 -All right! -It's our coach. 70 00:03:16,833 --> 00:03:20,375 That's right. Happy softball season, A-Rods and A-Holes. 71 00:03:20,458 --> 00:03:23,416 -And there's our star slugger. -Say, Joe, knuckle me a donut. 72 00:03:23,500 --> 00:03:25,625 Mm-hmm. Here comes a heater. [spits] 73 00:03:26,125 --> 00:03:27,333 -[grunts] -[cheering] 74 00:03:27,416 --> 00:03:28,416 -Yeah. -There you go. 75 00:03:28,500 --> 00:03:31,458 And that's how we're gonna do it this season. But with a ball. 76 00:03:31,541 --> 00:03:32,583 [Mona] Hell yeah! 77 00:03:32,666 --> 00:03:34,791 So there's an office softball league? 78 00:03:34,875 --> 00:03:37,458 -Yeah. -How very pre-gig-economy. 79 00:03:37,541 --> 00:03:40,875 Your mother is actually a pretty legendary hitter. 80 00:03:40,958 --> 00:03:45,291 Back in the Jazz Age, she hit a ball so hard, it shat itself. 81 00:03:45,375 --> 00:03:46,791 [Walter] Now approaching the plate, 82 00:03:46,875 --> 00:03:50,375 that hotsy-totsy dame they call Lil Syphilis. 83 00:03:50,458 --> 00:03:52,041 That's right, because her swing, 84 00:03:52,125 --> 00:03:55,500 just like the infection, is lethal in this era. 85 00:03:56,166 --> 00:03:57,125 [ball farts] 86 00:03:57,208 --> 00:03:59,708 [Kitty] What in the F. Scott Shitzgerald? 87 00:03:59,791 --> 00:04:03,291 Oh my God, it's a Great Shatsby. 88 00:04:03,375 --> 00:04:07,041 That moment gave us all a little hope in a time of… 89 00:04:07,125 --> 00:04:08,416 so much jazz. 90 00:04:08,500 --> 00:04:11,375 There you are. My uncompensated protégé. 91 00:04:11,458 --> 00:04:14,750 -Tell me, can you play shortstop? -Whatever you need, boss. 92 00:04:14,833 --> 00:04:16,750 -[groans] -Connie Mommy, look. 93 00:04:16,833 --> 00:04:19,708 I'm a hot little slice of Americana, just like you. 94 00:04:19,791 --> 00:04:23,416 Oh, you play on whichever team you want, okay, baby? 95 00:04:23,500 --> 00:04:24,708 Okay. 96 00:04:24,791 --> 00:04:26,083 But if you play against me, 97 00:04:26,166 --> 00:04:29,166 I'll make you shit like a ball. 98 00:04:29,250 --> 00:04:31,791 -Oh. -Have a good first day, kiddo. 99 00:04:32,375 --> 00:04:34,625 -Um, are you guys in there again? -[moaning] 100 00:04:34,708 --> 00:04:37,625 -Get your stupid staples later, Ethan. -[Ethan] Well, maybe I will. 101 00:04:37,708 --> 00:04:39,000 -[sighs] -[chuckles] 102 00:04:39,083 --> 00:04:42,125 -You're naughty. -Not naughty, Pete. Hateful. 103 00:04:42,208 --> 00:04:43,666 I hate Dante. 104 00:04:43,750 --> 00:04:46,083 -Ooh! [laughs] -I hate that glitter-titted Hope. 105 00:04:46,166 --> 00:04:47,208 Oh God, yeah. 106 00:04:47,291 --> 00:04:51,833 And I hate that you're still wearing that dorky little outfit of yours. 107 00:04:51,916 --> 00:04:52,958 [chomps, gulps] 108 00:04:53,041 --> 00:04:55,666 Oh, uh… [chuckles] That was a $30 tie, 109 00:04:55,750 --> 00:04:57,541 but, you know what, whatever the lady likes. 110 00:04:57,625 --> 00:05:01,583 Well, the lady would like you dick naked and cheeks up, now. 111 00:05:01,666 --> 00:05:03,083 [yells] 112 00:05:03,666 --> 00:05:05,375 -Hoo! [chuckles] -[exhales] 113 00:05:05,458 --> 00:05:08,000 Now that's what I call intercourse. [chuckles] 114 00:05:08,083 --> 00:05:09,250 All right, Pete. I'm out. 115 00:05:09,333 --> 00:05:11,625 Bring that rubble butt back here at lunchtime. 116 00:05:11,708 --> 00:05:13,833 [chuckles] Um… [clears throat] 117 00:05:13,916 --> 00:05:18,083 Speaking of my buttocks, I was thinking about, uh, you know, 118 00:05:18,166 --> 00:05:21,916 other things you could bite, like, I don't know, a nice meal sometime? 119 00:05:22,000 --> 00:05:22,833 [scoffs] A what? 120 00:05:22,916 --> 00:05:25,000 Well, uh, maybe even two meals. [chuckles] 121 00:05:25,083 --> 00:05:26,666 Vigorous coitus demands nutrients. 122 00:05:26,750 --> 00:05:29,125 No dates. That's not how hate-fucking works. 123 00:05:29,208 --> 00:05:31,375 Oh, uh, "hate-fucking." I see. 124 00:05:31,458 --> 00:05:34,208 Look, when you're a worm, all fuckin' is hate-fuckin'. 125 00:05:34,291 --> 00:05:36,000 -It's not personal. -Oh! Heh. 126 00:05:36,083 --> 00:05:39,625 "Not personal." Uh, so you don't hate me? 127 00:05:39,708 --> 00:05:42,208 -Not particularly. -Well, heh, cool beans then. 128 00:05:42,291 --> 00:05:44,083 Yeah, cool beans, Pete. 129 00:05:44,166 --> 00:05:48,000 Okay, well, I'm gonna, uh, go urinate, so I don't get a UTI. 130 00:05:48,083 --> 00:05:49,458 I suggest you do the same. 131 00:05:49,541 --> 00:05:51,375 [humming] 132 00:05:51,458 --> 00:05:53,041 Hey, Pete, do these shiny lips 133 00:05:53,125 --> 00:05:56,083 make you wanna kiss and eventually marry me? 134 00:05:56,166 --> 00:05:58,541 -Uh… -I mean, if you were Van. 135 00:05:58,625 --> 00:06:02,416 Ohh, I see. Sounds like you two are getting serious. 136 00:06:02,500 --> 00:06:05,916 Oh, you know. [giggles] Kinda serious. 137 00:06:06,000 --> 00:06:08,666 I mean, she keeps telling me she doesn't want a relationship, 138 00:06:08,750 --> 00:06:10,416 but I'm gonna show her how wrong she is. 139 00:06:10,500 --> 00:06:12,250 -We're cute. -Well, cheers. [chuckles] 140 00:06:12,333 --> 00:06:16,250 You know, incidentally, I also have romantic news about Rochelle. 141 00:06:16,333 --> 00:06:18,083 Shut up. Tell me everything. Shut up! 142 00:06:18,166 --> 00:06:19,791 Okay, okay, I'll tell you two things. 143 00:06:19,875 --> 00:06:23,375 Supply closet and… [whispering] …ten minutes ago. 144 00:06:23,458 --> 00:06:24,708 [laughs] 145 00:06:24,791 --> 00:06:26,875 -Holy holy shit! -[chuckles] 146 00:06:26,958 --> 00:06:28,916 Yeah. It's all happening. 147 00:06:29,000 --> 00:06:32,875 Me in the relationship I've always wanted, you getting back out there. Look at us go. 148 00:06:32,958 --> 00:06:34,625 We're thriving this season. 149 00:06:34,708 --> 00:06:37,875 Everything is coming up Pete and Emmy. [chuckles] 150 00:06:37,958 --> 00:06:40,250 All right. Well, I'll let you return to your seduction. 151 00:06:40,333 --> 00:06:43,541 And I'll let you get back to humping in storage. 152 00:06:43,625 --> 00:06:45,958 Man, I love a sexy office romance. 153 00:06:46,041 --> 00:06:48,166 Wait. "Office romance"? 154 00:06:48,250 --> 00:06:50,750 -Huh? -Oh my God, that's exactly what it is. 155 00:06:50,833 --> 00:06:53,125 Emmy! Emmy! We have to get to Creature Administrations 156 00:06:53,208 --> 00:06:55,000 and report our workplace liaisons. 157 00:06:55,083 --> 00:06:57,625 Cool, I'll meet you down there. Hope there are forms. 158 00:06:57,708 --> 00:07:01,500 Ho-ho, you won't be disappointed, friend. There are so many forms. 159 00:07:01,583 --> 00:07:03,333 Yeah, no, I'm goin' this way. 160 00:07:03,833 --> 00:07:05,583 Yeah, that's it, Black Cloaks, 161 00:07:05,666 --> 00:07:09,541 get better at the thing you'll do in the game. 162 00:07:09,625 --> 00:07:11,666 -You know, the-- the thing. -[chuckles] 163 00:07:11,750 --> 00:07:12,750 Pathetic. 164 00:07:12,833 --> 00:07:14,250 [chitters] 165 00:07:14,333 --> 00:07:17,000 Of course they're not a real threat, Moneyballs. 166 00:07:17,083 --> 00:07:19,916 -But a little intel never hurts. -[Lionel] Oh! 167 00:07:20,000 --> 00:07:21,375 What's this now? 168 00:07:21,458 --> 00:07:23,625 [Lionel] Yes, Montel. Never stop. 169 00:07:23,708 --> 00:07:24,958 Oh, shit. 170 00:07:25,041 --> 00:07:26,291 [whistles] 171 00:07:26,375 --> 00:07:27,750 [Maury pants] 172 00:07:27,833 --> 00:07:29,833 -Uh, here. You're gonna need all of this. -Mm? 173 00:07:29,916 --> 00:07:33,458 HGH? Bull steroids? What is all this shit for? 174 00:07:33,541 --> 00:07:36,416 It's Montel. They're good. Uh, too good. 175 00:07:36,500 --> 00:07:38,958 They might even be a better softball player than y-- 176 00:07:39,041 --> 00:07:40,083 How dare! 177 00:07:40,166 --> 00:07:44,625 Hey, if you're mad, then why did you do the sexiest possible thing to me? 178 00:07:44,708 --> 00:07:46,166 -Ah! -[grunts] 179 00:07:46,250 --> 00:07:48,958 It's all incredibly hot. I-- I-- I don't know what to tell you. 180 00:07:49,041 --> 00:07:51,958 Well, I don't need your stupid pills to win this game. 181 00:07:52,041 --> 00:07:53,583 -But, Connie-- -Please observe. 182 00:07:53,666 --> 00:07:57,375 Hey, Sonya, one softball shit on the rocks, please. 183 00:07:57,458 --> 00:07:59,875 Uh, we don't have softball shit. 184 00:07:59,958 --> 00:08:02,583 Oh, my mistake and my apologies. 185 00:08:02,666 --> 00:08:05,458 Why, pray tell, don't you have softball shit? 186 00:08:05,541 --> 00:08:10,541 Because it hasn't existed since the 1920s when you hit that homer. 187 00:08:10,625 --> 00:08:12,541 That will be all, Sonya. Thank you. 188 00:08:12,625 --> 00:08:16,333 Point taken, okay? You're the best, and I should not have questioned that. 189 00:08:16,416 --> 00:08:17,250 Thank you, Maury. 190 00:08:17,333 --> 00:08:21,125 Well, if you really wanna thank me, you'll slap me around some more. 191 00:08:21,208 --> 00:08:23,041 Maybe step on my nuts? 192 00:08:23,125 --> 00:08:24,125 Yeah, all right. 193 00:08:24,208 --> 00:08:28,166 Get those suckers on the bar, and I'll get my Doc Martens. 194 00:08:28,250 --> 00:08:30,083 [amusing music playing] 195 00:08:30,166 --> 00:08:31,333 [snores] 196 00:08:31,416 --> 00:08:33,666 Oh, hello, sleepy Sarah. 197 00:08:33,750 --> 00:08:35,958 -Hello, random sex man. -[Van chuckles] 198 00:08:36,041 --> 00:08:37,333 And, oh, hey, Van. 199 00:08:37,416 --> 00:08:41,458 Fancy meeting you here with my lips all glossed up and kissable. 200 00:08:41,541 --> 00:08:43,791 They do look very wet. 201 00:08:43,875 --> 00:08:46,000 But they're really just sticky. 202 00:08:46,083 --> 00:08:47,375 -[phone vibrates] -[gasps, sighs] 203 00:08:47,458 --> 00:08:49,125 -Time to skedaddle? -Right. Skedaddle. 204 00:08:49,208 --> 00:08:51,500 We skedaddle because we, as a collective, 205 00:08:51,583 --> 00:08:53,666 don't give a shit about relationships, 206 00:08:53,750 --> 00:08:56,666 even though it is nice to have a partner to share your life with. 207 00:08:56,750 --> 00:08:57,750 Emmy… 208 00:08:57,833 --> 00:09:02,208 What? I'm not talking about us. I meant theoretically. 209 00:09:02,791 --> 00:09:05,291 [groans] Where the hell is the door? Ow! 210 00:09:05,375 --> 00:09:07,041 Oh my God. Shit. I-I'm so sorry. 211 00:09:07,125 --> 00:09:10,041 I was getting water. I didn't even see you. Sarah? 212 00:09:10,125 --> 00:09:11,416 -Ben? -It's Ben! Ben's here! 213 00:09:11,500 --> 00:09:12,791 [both] What the fuck? 214 00:09:12,875 --> 00:09:16,041 What the fuck me? Uh, this is… [chuckles] …my home. 215 00:09:16,125 --> 00:09:18,291 So what the fuck you, actually. 216 00:09:18,375 --> 00:09:20,916 Wha… Oh God, this is the same apartment. 217 00:09:21,000 --> 00:09:25,125 Which we could not have known. Every dude lives in this apartment. 218 00:09:25,208 --> 00:09:28,458 Uh, so, are you stalking me or something? 219 00:09:28,541 --> 00:09:30,708 Ew, no! I-- I was just… 220 00:09:30,791 --> 00:09:31,916 I, um… 221 00:09:32,000 --> 00:09:32,875 [babbles] 222 00:09:32,958 --> 00:09:35,833 …went home with some guy, 223 00:09:35,916 --> 00:09:39,625 and it turns out he's your roommate. 224 00:09:39,708 --> 00:09:41,625 Oh, wow. With Cody? 225 00:09:41,708 --> 00:09:43,250 Yep, I know. I'm an asshole. 226 00:09:43,333 --> 00:09:45,500 -Uh, I'm getting an Uber and leaving. -[sighs] 227 00:09:45,583 --> 00:09:49,875 So I guess your "aunt thing" was just not wanting to hang out with me? 228 00:09:49,958 --> 00:09:52,875 -Aw, Sarah, he's sad. -Who cares? 229 00:09:52,958 --> 00:09:57,041 Shit. Um… It's a 57-minute wait and it's raining. 230 00:09:57,125 --> 00:10:00,083 Can I take this CVS bag so I can put it on my head? 231 00:10:00,166 --> 00:10:01,250 [groans] 232 00:10:01,333 --> 00:10:02,666 Wow. Fine. Keep it. 233 00:10:02,750 --> 00:10:05,708 No, that's not what I… Look, I'll just give you a ride. 234 00:10:05,791 --> 00:10:09,333 I'm sorry. I like him. I like when they provide services. 235 00:10:09,416 --> 00:10:11,500 [thunderclap] 236 00:10:11,583 --> 00:10:13,375 You know, you could have sat up front. 237 00:10:13,458 --> 00:10:16,833 It's cool. Just thought I'd keep it professional. 238 00:10:16,916 --> 00:10:20,875 Ugh, I really am sorry about the "aunt thing" thing. 239 00:10:20,958 --> 00:10:22,208 Ew, why are you apologizing? 240 00:10:22,291 --> 00:10:26,291 And if it makes you feel any better, Cody sucks at sex. 241 00:10:26,375 --> 00:10:29,041 [chuckles] That-- That does help a little bit. 242 00:10:29,125 --> 00:10:31,916 -You should talk to him about that. -Actually, I don't think I will. 243 00:10:32,000 --> 00:10:32,833 [laughs] 244 00:10:32,916 --> 00:10:35,583 -Vibe. Sarah, the vibe is back. -Is not, shut up. 245 00:10:35,666 --> 00:10:37,875 Hey, can I ask you something weird? 246 00:10:37,958 --> 00:10:38,958 Uh, okay? 247 00:10:39,041 --> 00:10:42,333 That night that we were together, did you steal my deodorant? 248 00:10:42,416 --> 00:10:45,000 -She did. She's wearing it. -That's crazy and weird. 249 00:10:45,083 --> 00:10:47,125 Why-- Why would I want your deodorant? 250 00:10:47,208 --> 00:10:49,958 I-- I don't know. Why would you be in my kitchen at 1:00 a.m.? 251 00:10:50,041 --> 00:10:52,500 -Like, are you obsessed with me…? -Definitely not, dude. 252 00:10:52,583 --> 00:10:54,291 Or do you wanna murder me? 253 00:10:54,375 --> 00:10:57,208 -We don't. You're hot. -I promise it's neither. 254 00:10:57,291 --> 00:11:01,625 But this ride was very kind, and I guess I'm glad I ran into you. 255 00:11:01,708 --> 00:11:03,541 [navigation voice] Arriving at your destination. 256 00:11:03,625 --> 00:11:06,958 -Okay, well, uh, have a good-- -We should try one date. 257 00:11:07,041 --> 00:11:09,583 -[all] What?! -Wait, right? I can't tell anymore. 258 00:11:09,666 --> 00:11:14,916 Knowing you has been very confusing, but I find you… oddly compelling. 259 00:11:15,000 --> 00:11:17,458 -[gasps] Oh my God. -It's a coincidence. 260 00:11:17,541 --> 00:11:18,625 Bitch, say yes. 261 00:11:18,708 --> 00:11:20,458 -Nope. No, thank you. -Um... I-- I don't kno-- 262 00:11:20,541 --> 00:11:22,083 -Ow! I-- I have to think. -Nope. Come on. 263 00:11:22,166 --> 00:11:23,666 -Good night. -I'll text you. 264 00:11:23,750 --> 00:11:25,666 [sighs] Yeah, I'm sure you will. 265 00:11:25,750 --> 00:11:27,125 I know you can't hear me, sir, 266 00:11:27,208 --> 00:11:29,791 but I am gonna do everything in my damn power 267 00:11:29,875 --> 00:11:32,625 to help you double-dip that dick in my girl. 268 00:11:32,708 --> 00:11:33,625 [Pete] Good morning. 269 00:11:33,708 --> 00:11:37,750 I, uh, seek formal approval to continue a workplace romance. 270 00:11:37,833 --> 00:11:39,958 You'll find I've completed all mandatory forms. 271 00:11:40,041 --> 00:11:42,958 Oh, great. And now I get to process them. 272 00:11:43,041 --> 00:11:44,208 Ugh, okay. 273 00:11:44,291 --> 00:11:47,916 Concerned parties. Pete Doheny. Rochelle Hillcrest. 274 00:11:48,000 --> 00:11:48,958 Hillhurst. 275 00:11:49,041 --> 00:11:51,708 The gorgeous, highly accomplished worm on floor three. [chuckles] 276 00:11:51,791 --> 00:11:53,791 I know what you're thinking, how did I get so lucky? 277 00:11:53,875 --> 00:11:57,250 I'm not thinking. Confirm that you are not Ms. Hillhurst's supervisor. 278 00:11:57,333 --> 00:11:58,166 Confirmed. 279 00:11:58,250 --> 00:12:00,708 -Has there been any harassment? -Oh, not at all. 280 00:12:00,791 --> 00:12:05,416 Uh, although, her ass meant a great deal to me when I first saw it. 281 00:12:05,500 --> 00:12:07,166 -[chuckles] -Please, sir. I have a migraine. 282 00:12:07,250 --> 00:12:09,208 -Sorry. -Now, is this an exclusive relationship? 283 00:12:09,291 --> 00:12:10,916 Oh, uh… Well, no. 284 00:12:11,000 --> 00:12:14,125 I would welcome that, of course, but she's still getting over her-- 285 00:12:14,208 --> 00:12:17,500 Do you discuss confidential client information on dates? 286 00:12:17,583 --> 00:12:19,250 "Dates," you said? [chuckles] 287 00:12:19,333 --> 00:12:20,541 -[worker sighs] -Dates. 288 00:12:20,625 --> 00:12:23,166 Um, well, see, the thing is, Rochelle would happily starve 289 00:12:23,250 --> 00:12:24,833 before she'd sit in a restaurant with me. 290 00:12:24,916 --> 00:12:26,250 That has been made clear. 291 00:12:26,333 --> 00:12:30,791 So frankly, Mr. Questions, I'm not sure to which "dates" you refer. 292 00:12:30,875 --> 00:12:34,041 [groans] Okay, man. I think you filled out the wrong form. 293 00:12:34,125 --> 00:12:35,958 Okay, well, now you're embarrassing yourself 294 00:12:36,041 --> 00:12:38,333 because I do not fill out incorrect forms. 295 00:12:38,416 --> 00:12:44,333 So please process my Form 7413B for a Workplace Romance. 296 00:12:44,416 --> 00:12:49,500 No, because you're supposed to fill out a 7413D 297 00:12:49,583 --> 00:12:54,083 for Sad Little Fuck-Puppets Getting Used For Sex By Their Coworker. 298 00:12:54,166 --> 00:12:56,916 [scoffs] It can't possibly say that on the… 299 00:12:57,000 --> 00:12:58,125 Oh my God, it does. 300 00:12:58,208 --> 00:12:59,916 Please leave if you're going to cry. 301 00:13:00,000 --> 00:13:02,375 My union says I don't have to look at that. 302 00:13:02,458 --> 00:13:06,125 [to the tune of the US National Anthem] ♪ O, spray tans are free ♪ 303 00:13:06,208 --> 00:13:09,666 ♪ At the place near my house ♪ 304 00:13:09,750 --> 00:13:12,958 ♪ When you pay for nine tans ♪ 305 00:13:13,041 --> 00:13:17,083 ♪ Then the tenth one is gratis ♪ 306 00:13:17,166 --> 00:13:20,541 ♪ And the girl's name is Claire ♪ 307 00:13:20,625 --> 00:13:23,500 ♪ And she has shiny hair ♪ 308 00:13:23,583 --> 00:13:26,916 ♪ She went to school with my mom ♪ 309 00:13:27,000 --> 00:13:30,791 ♪ But they weren't super close ♪ 310 00:13:30,875 --> 00:13:34,458 ♪ O, Claire doesn't ever ♪ 311 00:13:34,541 --> 00:13:40,166 ♪ Remember my name ♪ 312 00:13:40,250 --> 00:13:44,833 ♪ But her spray tans look sweet ♪ 313 00:13:44,916 --> 00:13:51,083 ♪ So I help pay her student loans ♪ 314 00:13:51,166 --> 00:13:52,666 -Well done, Mr. Rick. -[applause] 315 00:13:52,750 --> 00:13:54,750 Let's play some basketball! 316 00:13:54,833 --> 00:13:56,125 -USA! -Woo-hoo! 317 00:13:56,208 --> 00:13:59,625 This pitcher throws a sinker, so remember, keep your eye on the ball. 318 00:13:59,708 --> 00:14:02,708 She could even throw a change-up, in which case, remember, 319 00:14:02,791 --> 00:14:04,583 keep your eye on the ball. 320 00:14:04,666 --> 00:14:06,125 I got it. [gasps] 321 00:14:06,208 --> 00:14:07,041 The hell? 322 00:14:07,125 --> 00:14:08,791 Oh, hey, Mamas. [spits] 323 00:14:08,875 --> 00:14:13,125 Lionel's got Montel pitching now too? That filthy cheat. 324 00:14:13,208 --> 00:14:16,541 That was not in the game plan I stole from his office. 325 00:14:16,625 --> 00:14:18,875 [Walter, over PA] Here comes the first pitch. 326 00:14:18,958 --> 00:14:20,291 -[grunts] -Strike one. 327 00:14:20,375 --> 00:14:21,708 Oh, my. 328 00:14:22,333 --> 00:14:23,416 Strike two. 329 00:14:23,500 --> 00:14:26,125 Connie can't strike out, right? I mean, she never strikes out. 330 00:14:26,208 --> 00:14:28,750 You know what she should do? Keep her eye on-- 331 00:14:28,833 --> 00:14:29,958 -She knows that, Gil. -Ahh! 332 00:14:30,041 --> 00:14:33,500 All right, I hope you enjoyed playtime, baby. 333 00:14:33,583 --> 00:14:36,291 Because Mama's gonna put you to bed now. 334 00:14:36,375 --> 00:14:37,458 -[grunts] -Oh! 335 00:14:37,541 --> 00:14:39,833 -Strike three! -Oh, my gosh! 336 00:14:39,916 --> 00:14:43,583 [laughs] Holy shit! Mom, did you see that? 337 00:14:43,666 --> 00:14:45,000 'Cause if you did, 338 00:14:45,083 --> 00:14:46,250 you should've hit it. 339 00:14:46,333 --> 00:14:48,333 Wow, just wow. 340 00:14:48,416 --> 00:14:54,291 The unflappable Connie LaCienega very much flapped at the top of the game. 341 00:14:54,375 --> 00:14:57,500 Tyler! How can you eat nachos at a time like this? 342 00:14:57,583 --> 00:14:59,208 They're jalapeño nachos. 343 00:14:59,291 --> 00:15:02,833 They make my semen muy picante. 344 00:15:02,916 --> 00:15:04,958 Oh my God! I struck out. 345 00:15:05,041 --> 00:15:09,541 That little fuckin' nobody's trying to steal my game. 346 00:15:09,625 --> 00:15:11,625 -You should have kept your eye-- -Don't you… 347 00:15:11,708 --> 00:15:13,166 [choking] I know you're mad, 348 00:15:13,250 --> 00:15:16,208 but you're making me hard in front of the team. 349 00:15:17,375 --> 00:15:19,916 -Okay, let's see here. -Could we make this a quickie? 350 00:15:20,000 --> 00:15:22,583 I want to get back for the 7th-inning stretch-out-your-asshole. 351 00:15:22,666 --> 00:15:24,750 -You got it, Mona. -You called this meeting? 352 00:15:24,833 --> 00:15:28,708 Why, yes, I did, and by the end of it, you're gonna wanna go on a date. 353 00:15:28,791 --> 00:15:30,541 Really? With you? 354 00:15:30,625 --> 00:15:35,125 No, I meant Ben and Sarah, but it's good to know you wanna date me. 355 00:15:35,208 --> 00:15:37,916 -You're relentless. -And a little delusional. 356 00:15:38,000 --> 00:15:40,500 -[chuckles] -Sarah and Ben. 357 00:15:40,583 --> 00:15:43,125 What the fuck? Emmy made a PowerPoint? 358 00:15:43,208 --> 00:15:46,625 They've had not one, but two meet-cutes. 359 00:15:46,708 --> 00:15:49,833 Some would call that a meet-two-t. 360 00:15:49,916 --> 00:15:51,416 Some would call it fate. 361 00:15:51,500 --> 00:15:54,916 Well, some would call fate "very not real." 362 00:15:55,000 --> 00:15:57,208 Logical objections, naturally. 363 00:15:57,291 --> 00:16:00,166 All of which I've addressed in my upcoming slides. 364 00:16:00,250 --> 00:16:02,750 I'll show 'em to you, if you ask nicely. 365 00:16:02,833 --> 00:16:04,750 All right, Boss Baby Emmy. 366 00:16:04,833 --> 00:16:06,875 Show me your slides please. 367 00:16:06,958 --> 00:16:08,166 What's going on with you two? 368 00:16:08,250 --> 00:16:10,250 Why are you breathing at each other so much? 369 00:16:10,333 --> 00:16:14,375 As you can see in slide two, human life is short, 370 00:16:14,458 --> 00:16:18,000 which by Van's own logic, means humans should, uh… 371 00:16:18,083 --> 00:16:22,583 -What was that rule again? -Minimize pain, maximize pleasure. 372 00:16:22,666 --> 00:16:26,291 Exactly. Well, guess what I find pleasurable. 373 00:16:26,375 --> 00:16:27,208 Love. 374 00:16:27,291 --> 00:16:29,750 You think the urinal guy is true love? 375 00:16:29,833 --> 00:16:32,000 Oh, no, no, no, no, no. 376 00:16:32,083 --> 00:16:34,250 I think he's new love. 377 00:16:34,333 --> 00:16:37,750 Floaty, buzzy horniness 378 00:16:37,833 --> 00:16:40,750 that's so loud you can't taste food. 379 00:16:40,833 --> 00:16:43,458 -That's maximum pleasure. -Yes to the date! 380 00:16:43,541 --> 00:16:46,708 I got a pulse in my vag too. Let's text what's-his-face. 381 00:16:46,791 --> 00:16:51,291 Damn, Em. I had no idea you could be so analytical. 382 00:16:51,375 --> 00:16:55,208 Oh, it's always my pleasure to analyze this. 383 00:16:55,291 --> 00:16:59,041 Sexy fucking movie! Fist each other right now, or I quit. 384 00:16:59,125 --> 00:17:02,333 So, Van, what do you say? One date? 385 00:17:02,416 --> 00:17:05,791 All right, one date. But just to shut you up. 386 00:17:05,875 --> 00:17:07,208 Baby, I'll take it. 387 00:17:07,291 --> 00:17:12,625 Clits ahoy! Stick around, lesbians. After this, more softball. 388 00:17:12,708 --> 00:17:15,583 [Walter] It's the bottom of the fourth, and the Black Cloaks, 389 00:17:15,666 --> 00:17:17,125 well, they could use a rally, honey. 390 00:17:17,208 --> 00:17:21,250 All right, let's go, Black Cloaks. Come on. Let's see her. 391 00:17:21,333 --> 00:17:22,500 [Kitty] It's a pop fly. 392 00:17:22,583 --> 00:17:25,166 [Walter] But there seems to be an open fly in the outfield. 393 00:17:25,250 --> 00:17:26,333 -[moans] -[splash] 394 00:17:26,416 --> 00:17:29,041 -[Tyler] Lo siento, grass. -Tyler! Eyes up, dick down. 395 00:17:29,125 --> 00:17:30,041 Oh! 396 00:17:30,625 --> 00:17:31,541 [Kitty] He's safe. 397 00:17:31,625 --> 00:17:34,291 With that, the Black Cloaks have three Wizards on base. 398 00:17:34,375 --> 00:17:37,291 Not unlike Les Claypool, Sir Paul McCartney, 399 00:17:37,375 --> 00:17:39,875 and Flea from the Red Hot Chili Peppers. 400 00:17:39,958 --> 00:17:41,250 That's three wizards… 401 00:17:41,333 --> 00:17:42,750 [imitates bass notes] 402 00:17:42,833 --> 00:17:44,416 …on bass. [laughs] 403 00:17:44,500 --> 00:17:49,000 Oh God. The time has come. Gil, hand me my anal beads. [groans] 404 00:17:49,083 --> 00:17:51,458 Hail Mary, full of grace, the long dong is with thee. 405 00:17:51,541 --> 00:17:54,791 [Kitty] Montel LaBeverley steps up to the plate. 406 00:17:54,875 --> 00:17:56,875 Do your thing, rookie. 407 00:17:56,958 --> 00:18:00,416 Psst! Montel! I hear Joe's gonna throw a slider. 408 00:18:00,500 --> 00:18:01,750 [blows kiss] Good luck, sugar. 409 00:18:01,833 --> 00:18:03,958 Aw, thanks, Connie Mommy. 410 00:18:04,041 --> 00:18:06,083 You lyin', big-haired bitch. 411 00:18:06,166 --> 00:18:10,166 [grunting in slow-motion] 412 00:18:10,250 --> 00:18:11,791 [triumphant music playing] 413 00:18:11,875 --> 00:18:16,291 [Walter] Geena Davis Christ, the ball seems to be shitting. 414 00:18:16,375 --> 00:18:18,083 -[ball farting] -[Kitty] And pissing. 415 00:18:18,166 --> 00:18:19,916 This is a softball first. 416 00:18:20,000 --> 00:18:21,458 It's going, going, 417 00:18:21,541 --> 00:18:23,875 it's in a toxic-onscreen-marriage-to-Ben-Affleck, 418 00:18:23,958 --> 00:18:25,125 Gone Girl! 419 00:18:25,208 --> 00:18:27,416 Grand slam, thank you, ma'am! 420 00:18:27,500 --> 00:18:31,375 I'm God! Sports are everything to me! 421 00:18:31,458 --> 00:18:32,833 Oh, hey, Mama M. 422 00:18:32,916 --> 00:18:35,833 [groans] Gil, put these back in my ass, please. 423 00:18:35,916 --> 00:18:40,000 Hey, Tyler. Get over here, and bring your spicy sack with you. 424 00:18:40,083 --> 00:18:40,958 Okay. 425 00:18:41,041 --> 00:18:42,750 Mama got a plan. 426 00:18:42,833 --> 00:18:45,083 I love your choice of venue. 427 00:18:45,666 --> 00:18:47,583 -[barking] -Very romantic. 428 00:18:47,666 --> 00:18:51,125 Yeah, I hope it isn't weird that I used to fuck a lot of these dogs. 429 00:18:51,208 --> 00:18:54,041 Hey, New York's a small town. It was bound to happen. 430 00:18:54,125 --> 00:18:55,041 [both laugh] 431 00:18:55,125 --> 00:18:58,875 Okay, Ben. Rolling with the bestiality joke. 432 00:18:58,958 --> 00:19:01,166 [chuckles] I guess he is kinda fun. 433 00:19:01,250 --> 00:19:04,041 [chuckles] Do you do that sleeve thing every time? 434 00:19:04,125 --> 00:19:06,041 The windshield wipe? Oh, yeah. 435 00:19:06,125 --> 00:19:08,458 I've always prided myself on a clean mustache. 436 00:19:08,541 --> 00:19:10,708 -Since sixth grade. -Hang on. Sixth grade? 437 00:19:10,791 --> 00:19:13,791 -Eleven years old, full Tom Selleck. -[Sarah laughs] 438 00:19:13,875 --> 00:19:16,583 Oh, this is very gorgeous. 439 00:19:16,666 --> 00:19:18,458 Oh, yeah. Pediatricians were puzzled. 440 00:19:18,541 --> 00:19:20,083 -Someone wrote a paper about me. -[barks] 441 00:19:20,166 --> 00:19:21,708 -Whoa, buddy. -Oh, shit. 442 00:19:21,791 --> 00:19:24,291 [chuckles] Gotta keep that thing clean, right? 443 00:19:25,875 --> 00:19:30,708 Yes! Hell yes! Cute. Hot. Admit. 444 00:19:30,791 --> 00:19:34,375 Admit what? That fate is real, and love conquers all? 445 00:19:34,458 --> 00:19:38,833 No, none of that. Relax. I just meant tonight's a good night. 446 00:19:38,916 --> 00:19:42,791 Okay, yeah… I guess Sarah is having a good time. 447 00:19:42,875 --> 00:19:45,291 -Just Sarah? -Well, me too. 448 00:19:45,375 --> 00:19:47,375 [romantic music playing] 449 00:19:48,625 --> 00:19:53,041 [chuckles] You want real tween tragedy? Strap in for my emo phase. 450 00:19:53,125 --> 00:19:54,750 [Ben laughs] 451 00:19:54,833 --> 00:19:55,833 Very spooky. 452 00:19:55,916 --> 00:19:59,041 I got mall-arrested for stealing that spiky bracelet. 453 00:19:59,125 --> 00:19:59,958 Oh, wow. 454 00:20:00,041 --> 00:20:02,916 My mom made me wear pastels for a month as a punishment. 455 00:20:03,000 --> 00:20:06,666 -Diabolical. I like your mom. -[chuckles] Yeah. 456 00:20:06,750 --> 00:20:07,958 Wait. What did he say? 457 00:20:08,041 --> 00:20:11,250 Oh, uh, unless… no? Do we hate her? 458 00:20:11,333 --> 00:20:12,666 Dude, none of your business. 459 00:20:12,750 --> 00:20:16,000 What? What's going on? Why is my mouth empty? 460 00:20:16,083 --> 00:20:19,291 Yeah, my-- my mom and I… Can we-- Can we talk about something else, please? 461 00:20:19,375 --> 00:20:23,250 Oh, of course. No, uh, sorry. A-Absolutely. 462 00:20:23,333 --> 00:20:26,875 -I'm just gonna… -Oh, right. I'll… I can un-touch you. 463 00:20:26,958 --> 00:20:29,416 Wait, Sarah, what's the drama with your mama? 464 00:20:29,500 --> 00:20:31,750 -Not now, Emmy. -But you're being so weird. 465 00:20:31,833 --> 00:20:34,083 -We were having a good time. Wait, what? -[thud] 466 00:20:34,166 --> 00:20:37,458 [groans] This was stupid. So stupid. 467 00:20:37,541 --> 00:20:39,333 Fucking dog shit everywhere. 468 00:20:39,416 --> 00:20:42,583 Van? No. What the hell are you doing with those rocks? 469 00:20:42,666 --> 00:20:45,916 -Everything's fine. Just rela-- -Don't fucking tell me to relax. 470 00:20:46,000 --> 00:20:47,666 Okay, fine. 471 00:20:47,750 --> 00:20:52,458 Well, folks, the Stiff Sox have clawed their way back to the lead 472 00:20:52,541 --> 00:20:54,916 and are just one out away from victory. 473 00:20:55,000 --> 00:20:56,291 [Kitty] But with a big hit, 474 00:20:56,375 --> 00:21:00,041 Montel LaBeverley could win it all for the Black Cloaks. 475 00:21:00,125 --> 00:21:02,416 Hey, batter, batter, batter! I love you, but please fuck up. 476 00:21:02,500 --> 00:21:05,375 -Batter, batter, batter! -Come on, intern! Play like we pay you. 477 00:21:05,458 --> 00:21:07,291 -[Kitty] Here comes the-- -Hey, slugger. 478 00:21:07,375 --> 00:21:09,583 -Tyler? -Hot-sauce delivery. 479 00:21:09,666 --> 00:21:14,375 It's from my balls. [echoes] 480 00:21:15,333 --> 00:21:18,541 [in slow-motion] No! 481 00:21:19,541 --> 00:21:20,916 [gasping] 482 00:21:21,000 --> 00:21:22,458 -[sizzling] -Why?! Why?! 483 00:21:22,541 --> 00:21:23,875 [Kitty] Oh, jizz in the face. 484 00:21:24,458 --> 00:21:26,625 -You're out. -Oh, is that allowed? 485 00:21:26,708 --> 00:21:28,833 How are there seeds in it?! 486 00:21:28,916 --> 00:21:30,416 Unbelievable! 487 00:21:30,500 --> 00:21:33,791 The Hormone Monsters have Nancied their Kerrigan 488 00:21:33,875 --> 00:21:35,083 and won it all. 489 00:21:35,166 --> 00:21:37,291 We did it, Connie. Great plan. 490 00:21:37,375 --> 00:21:39,875 Was that a gooey Gillooly or what? 491 00:21:39,958 --> 00:21:40,791 Nice work, kid. 492 00:21:40,875 --> 00:21:44,333 Oh my God, Connie, you saved the day! I mean, you won the game! 493 00:21:44,416 --> 00:21:47,875 I mean, you had our child attacked, which is awful. 494 00:21:47,958 --> 00:21:49,750 See? I-- I-- I got there. I got there. 495 00:21:50,833 --> 00:21:53,250 [gulps, sighs] 496 00:21:53,333 --> 00:21:54,708 Another raspberry. 497 00:21:54,791 --> 00:21:58,208 -You sure about that, big guy? -Of course. Hey, I'm celebrating. 498 00:21:58,291 --> 00:22:01,875 I'm Rochelle's certified rent-a-hole, so cheers to me. 499 00:22:01,958 --> 00:22:04,625 Oh, by all means, stare. 500 00:22:04,708 --> 00:22:08,916 Look me in the eyes, please, because Lord knows Rochelle won't. 501 00:22:09,000 --> 00:22:12,041 Hey, Pete, I think I know what's gonna happen when I ask this, 502 00:22:12,125 --> 00:22:13,958 but, you okay? 503 00:22:14,041 --> 00:22:17,166 [sobs] 504 00:22:17,250 --> 00:22:18,875 Yeah. What I thought. 505 00:22:18,958 --> 00:22:22,458 I know some people look at me and see some big tough rock 506 00:22:22,541 --> 00:22:24,416 with huge muscles that are also rocks… 507 00:22:24,500 --> 00:22:25,333 Sure. 508 00:22:25,416 --> 00:22:28,500 …but underneath that, I'm actually a pretty sensitive guy. 509 00:22:28,583 --> 00:22:30,000 I do see that now. 510 00:22:30,083 --> 00:22:33,416 A sensitive guy and a Hate Worm. That's tricky math. 511 00:22:33,500 --> 00:22:35,958 Yeah, so what do you think I should do 512 00:22:36,041 --> 00:22:39,541 if I want a real romance but she only wants hate sex? 513 00:22:39,625 --> 00:22:40,708 -Get a doll? -What? 514 00:22:40,791 --> 00:22:43,916 You know, a doll that looks like her, and I pretend it says nice things. 515 00:22:44,000 --> 00:22:46,541 I think what you do is tell her the truth, Pete. 516 00:22:46,625 --> 00:22:47,458 Say what you need. 517 00:22:47,541 --> 00:22:50,541 But… she could say no and I could lose her entirely. 518 00:22:50,625 --> 00:22:52,166 Well, that's the risk. 519 00:22:52,250 --> 00:22:54,666 If you don't wanna take it, you can just keep being 520 00:22:54,750 --> 00:22:56,875 a "Sad Little Fuck-Puppet." 521 00:22:57,458 --> 00:23:01,500 No, Pete Doheny is more than a 7413D. 522 00:23:01,583 --> 00:23:03,250 I'm gonna tell her how I feel. 523 00:23:03,333 --> 00:23:05,083 -[laughs] That's what I'm talking about. -Hoo! 524 00:23:05,166 --> 00:23:07,666 That felt good. I, uh, do have other hard copies. 525 00:23:07,750 --> 00:23:11,083 Plus digital backups, both cloud and local, but, uh… Hoo! 526 00:23:11,166 --> 00:23:13,333 -All right. Hey! -Yeah! 527 00:23:13,416 --> 00:23:16,583 Victory circle jerk. Let's go, you two. 528 00:23:16,666 --> 00:23:20,833 Be right with you, Joe. I, uh, wanna go shake hands with the losers first. 529 00:23:20,916 --> 00:23:23,291 Not me, I wanna jack off my teammates. 530 00:23:23,375 --> 00:23:26,041 [Connie] Got you a Shamey Temple. Your fav-- 531 00:23:26,125 --> 00:23:27,375 How dare! 532 00:23:27,458 --> 00:23:31,875 How could you, Connie, pay him, Tyler, 533 00:23:31,958 --> 00:23:34,541 to I, Tonya me, Montel? 534 00:23:34,625 --> 00:23:37,541 Oh my God. Stop, stop, stop. 535 00:23:37,625 --> 00:23:41,500 Don't even try shaming me. It is not gonna work. 536 00:23:41,583 --> 00:23:44,333 [stammers] Pardon me. Professional curiosity. 537 00:23:44,416 --> 00:23:48,958 You're not ashamed for temporarily blinding your own child? 538 00:23:49,041 --> 00:23:50,916 -No, I am not. -[groans] 539 00:23:51,000 --> 00:23:54,333 -Monty, I love you, and I love lovin' you. -[gentle music playing] 540 00:23:54,416 --> 00:23:58,708 But today, you almost surpassed me at something I care about, 541 00:23:58,791 --> 00:24:01,375 and I just couldn't let that happen. 542 00:24:01,458 --> 00:24:05,541 Because if I surpassed you, you'd have to stop lovin' me? 543 00:24:05,625 --> 00:24:07,000 Exactly. 544 00:24:07,083 --> 00:24:12,041 So I took a hit out on you, and now we can be a family again. 545 00:24:12,125 --> 00:24:15,875 -Come here, honey. -[chuckles] Oh, this is very fucked up. 546 00:24:15,958 --> 00:24:20,625 Somehow, I feel shame for ever being good at softball. 547 00:24:20,708 --> 00:24:22,791 [gasps] How did you do that? 548 00:24:22,875 --> 00:24:26,166 -You got all your talent from me, baby. -Oh! 549 00:24:26,250 --> 00:24:28,833 I love you, you psycho bitch. 550 00:24:28,916 --> 00:24:34,958 So, yeah, that's why I stopped cutting my own hair. 551 00:24:35,041 --> 00:24:36,416 -[Van groans] -[chuckles] 552 00:24:36,500 --> 00:24:38,291 -Crazy, right? -Yeah, crazy. 553 00:24:38,375 --> 00:24:41,625 Come on, Sarah. Why are you shutting him out? 554 00:24:41,708 --> 00:24:44,875 [clears throat] I'm sorry again about before, 555 00:24:44,958 --> 00:24:46,791 if I pried about your mom. 556 00:24:46,875 --> 00:24:50,666 -It's fine. You didn't do anything wrong. -Yeah, exactly. He's a good man. 557 00:24:50,750 --> 00:24:53,291 -A mighty, mighty good man. -Jesus, can you talk normal? 558 00:24:53,375 --> 00:24:55,666 I'm just saying, I don't get what the problem is. 559 00:24:55,750 --> 00:24:57,041 Maybe you're the problem. 560 00:24:57,125 --> 00:25:01,041 Me? You're building a wall. A literal emotional wall. 561 00:25:01,125 --> 00:25:02,875 Is it made of you, by the way? 562 00:25:02,958 --> 00:25:05,458 Or are you pooing it? I don't know, I feel like that would hurt. 563 00:25:05,541 --> 00:25:07,541 Sarah, we never should've listened to her. I'm sorry. 564 00:25:07,625 --> 00:25:10,041 Whoa, hi. I'm right here. 565 00:25:10,125 --> 00:25:12,958 Look, I don't know what the big deal about your mom is, but-- 566 00:25:13,041 --> 00:25:15,833 [grunts] It's not about her mom. 567 00:25:15,916 --> 00:25:17,291 So drop it, Emmy, okay? 568 00:25:17,375 --> 00:25:20,958 Look, I-- I'm sorry if I pushed too hard. I just… 569 00:25:21,458 --> 00:25:23,625 I wanted something great for you. 570 00:25:23,708 --> 00:25:26,416 I wanted something great for all of us. 571 00:25:26,500 --> 00:25:29,041 -[groans] -I-- I really thought it could be great. 572 00:25:29,125 --> 00:25:30,583 Well, you thought wrong. 573 00:25:30,666 --> 00:25:34,458 What's happening? Why are you being so mean? 574 00:25:34,541 --> 00:25:37,250 ♪ Fuck feelings Swear that shit ruined my life ♪ 575 00:25:37,333 --> 00:25:39,208 ♪ All they ever do is just waste my time ♪ 576 00:25:39,291 --> 00:25:41,875 ♪ Fuck feelings Swear that shit ruined my life ♪ 577 00:25:41,958 --> 00:25:43,500 ♪ No, they never do me right ♪ 578 00:25:43,583 --> 00:25:48,333 ♪ Fuck feelings How I do when I'm feeling it for you ♪ 579 00:25:48,416 --> 00:25:50,625 ♪ Fuck feelings, fuck feelings ♪ 580 00:25:50,708 --> 00:25:53,208 ♪ Fuck feelings, fuck what I'm feeling ♪ 581 00:25:53,291 --> 00:25:57,750 ♪ I can't help myself when you're around ♪ 582 00:25:57,833 --> 00:26:02,333 ♪ Baby, I'm just tryna figure you out ♪ 583 00:26:02,416 --> 00:26:06,625 ♪ I don't wanna watch you turn me down ♪ 584 00:26:06,708 --> 00:26:11,500 ♪ So I'm just gonna turn back And go now, go now ♪ 585 00:26:11,583 --> 00:26:15,458 ♪ I can't just let go No, it's not like that ♪ 586 00:26:16,333 --> 00:26:20,250 ♪ I know if I see you I'll run right back ♪