1 00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:07,000 Downloaded from YTS.MX 2 00:00:08,000 --> 00:00:13,000 Official YIFY movies site: YTS.MX 3 00:00:17,333 --> 00:00:19,166 ‪陪审团的女士们先生们 4 00:00:19,833 --> 00:00:25,458 ‪我的委托人要求 ‪正义的天平要偏向于他 5 00:00:28,000 --> 00:00:29,708 ‪陪审团的女士们先生们 6 00:00:30,625 --> 00:00:33,916 ‪是时候揭开眼罩 7 00:00:34,666 --> 00:00:36,750 ‪让正义看见 8 00:00:41,250 --> 00:00:44,208 ‪抱歉 宝贝 你真的顺风顺水 ‪但我十分钟后要上庭了 所以… 9 00:00:45,125 --> 00:00:46,875 ‪我喜欢第二个版本 10 00:00:46,958 --> 00:00:50,250 ‪嘿 谢谢 我应该多利用 ‪地下室的女厕所 11 00:00:51,208 --> 00:00:52,875 ‪那是一切奇迹发生的地方 12 00:00:55,541 --> 00:01:00,916 ‪这本该是杰罗姆·约翰逊的黄金岁月 13 00:01:01,875 --> 00:01:04,250 ‪一名鳏夫 又开始约会了 14 00:01:05,000 --> 00:01:07,125 ‪心愿单上的事项也在一个个完成 15 00:01:07,208 --> 00:01:11,083 ‪比如骑着电动摩托车在城里飞驰 16 00:01:11,833 --> 00:01:15,250 ‪他的愿望清单里可没有 17 00:01:15,333 --> 00:01:18,208 ‪在派克街被一辆公共巴士撞 ‪造成髋部骨折 18 00:01:19,083 --> 00:01:21,958 ‪西雅图交通管理局打压受害者 19 00:01:22,041 --> 00:01:24,750 ‪他们用令人困惑 ‪毫无休止的繁文缛节 20 00:01:24,958 --> 00:01:28,750 ‪来阻止受害者拿到赔偿 21 00:01:29,250 --> 00:01:33,708 ‪他们指望正义对此被蒙蔽 22 00:01:34,625 --> 00:01:35,625 ‪但是时候 23 00:01:36,500 --> 00:01:38,791 ‪撕掉眼罩 24 00:01:39,791 --> 00:01:41,291 ‪让正义看见 25 00:01:47,375 --> 00:01:49,250 ‪你挽救了我的屁屁 孩子 26 00:01:49,750 --> 00:01:51,250 ‪我会找办法报答你 27 00:01:51,500 --> 00:01:53,708 ‪-我保证 ‪-别担心 28 00:01:54,041 --> 00:01:55,125 ‪平安回家 29 00:01:55,791 --> 00:01:56,625 ‪好的 30 00:02:01,208 --> 00:02:03,125 ‪不 我跟她断绝了联系 她走了 31 00:02:04,583 --> 00:02:05,708 ‪空心球 32 00:02:10,625 --> 00:02:11,833 {\an8}‪打搅 你… 33 00:03:22,125 --> 00:03:24,541 {\an8}‪-嘿 妹妹 情况如何? ‪-嘿 34 00:03:24,875 --> 00:03:26,166 {\an8}‪好人得一分 35 00:03:26,416 --> 00:03:27,916 {\an8}‪-恭喜 ‪-谢谢 36 00:03:28,000 --> 00:03:31,583 {\an8}‪想要过来庆祝吗? ‪吉迪恩正在教奥利弗做披萨 37 00:03:34,041 --> 00:03:35,458 {\an8}‪我们可能会预定那个披萨 38 00:03:36,375 --> 00:03:38,875 {\an8}‪你知道 我想来 ‪但我就是非常累 39 00:03:38,958 --> 00:03:41,833 {\an8}‪我的收件箱都满了 ‪所以改天好吗? 40 00:03:42,291 --> 00:03:43,333 {\an8}‪周五游戏之夜 41 00:03:43,708 --> 00:03:44,916 {\an8}‪是的 当然 42 00:03:45,000 --> 00:03:47,541 {\an8}‪这周《大富翁》里的钞票 ‪是我唯一能看见的钱 43 00:03:49,416 --> 00:03:50,333 ‪-再见 ‪-再见 44 00:03:53,791 --> 00:03:56,250 {\an8}‪-我预定达美乐比萨了 ‪-明智的决定 45 00:04:55,916 --> 00:04:56,833 ‪早上好 西雅图 46 00:04:56,916 --> 00:05:00,416 ‪天气预告就是雨啊雨 没错 更多的雨 47 00:05:01,875 --> 00:05:04,625 ‪现在请收听KNVB电台的交通报道 48 00:05:09,125 --> 00:05:09,958 ‪好的 49 00:05:10,458 --> 00:05:12,458 ‪不 卡普小姐 说慢一点 50 00:05:12,625 --> 00:05:13,875 ‪好的 怎么回事? 51 00:05:15,958 --> 00:05:18,750 ‪不 你的房东 ‪不能在你的前门上装挂锁 52 00:05:18,833 --> 00:05:21,416 ‪尼克的双倍浓缩咖啡 ‪苏珊的南瓜拿铁 53 00:05:21,500 --> 00:05:23,375 ‪对 对 我确定 54 00:05:24,208 --> 00:05:26,750 ‪对 不 我不在乎通知上怎么写 55 00:05:27,416 --> 00:05:28,250 ‪我很肯定 56 00:05:28,916 --> 00:05:31,416 ‪这不仅仅是不道德 而且是违法的 57 00:05:31,750 --> 00:05:34,041 ‪对 好的 等我一回到办公室 58 00:05:34,125 --> 00:05:35,875 ‪我们会跟他的律师谈这件事 59 00:05:36,791 --> 00:05:39,708 ‪对 我很抱歉发生这种事 ‪你知道 这不是… 60 00:05:40,375 --> 00:05:42,208 ‪真是对不起 我没看见你 61 00:05:42,583 --> 00:05:44,250 ‪我想他们忘记把我加入对话中了 62 00:05:46,291 --> 00:05:47,125 ‪好 63 00:05:47,791 --> 00:05:49,041 ‪不 我还在 64 00:05:49,416 --> 00:05:51,666 ‪对 我会尽快联络你 65 00:05:55,166 --> 00:05:56,708 ‪你知道这是骗局 是吗? 66 00:05:57,708 --> 00:05:58,541 ‪什么? 67 00:05:58,916 --> 00:06:01,250 ‪南瓜拿铁 里面根本没有南瓜 68 00:06:01,708 --> 00:06:02,875 ‪只是南瓜口味 69 00:06:03,875 --> 00:06:05,750 ‪每年秋天 咖啡行业表现地好像 70 00:06:05,833 --> 00:06:08,166 ‪大丰收的南瓜到货了 71 00:06:08,333 --> 00:06:10,208 ‪所以他们可以向大众兜售他们的饮品 72 00:06:10,708 --> 00:06:11,875 ‪你喝的是一个谎言 73 00:06:12,916 --> 00:06:14,458 ‪你为什么还在和我说话? 74 00:06:14,541 --> 00:06:16,458 ‪我没有 我们去的是同一个方向吗? 75 00:06:16,541 --> 00:06:18,500 ‪比起尴尬的沉默 ‪聊天不是更好吗 对不? 76 00:06:18,583 --> 00:06:21,333 ‪不是这样 这是尴尬的聊天 77 00:06:21,416 --> 00:06:23,250 ‪那么两者皆有 78 00:06:32,291 --> 00:06:35,583 ‪-你到底有什么事? ‪-是这个门?我有9点的预约 79 00:06:37,958 --> 00:06:40,083 ‪-欢迎来惠特克联合律师事务所 ‪-谢谢 80 00:06:43,541 --> 00:06:45,166 ‪恭喜你 81 00:06:50,958 --> 00:06:51,791 ‪好的… 82 00:06:51,875 --> 00:06:53,583 ‪饮水机要搬到哪里去? 83 00:06:53,958 --> 00:06:56,250 ‪我们做人浪部分为了恭喜 ‪部分是障眼法 84 00:06:56,375 --> 00:07:00,083 ‪原来公益服务的拉丁语 ‪是自来水的意思 85 00:07:00,291 --> 00:07:03,166 ‪如果你还是接官司不收费 ‪我必须削减预算 86 00:07:03,250 --> 00:07:04,416 ‪-再见 ‪-再见 87 00:07:04,500 --> 00:07:05,333 ‪再见 88 00:07:06,208 --> 00:07:07,041 ‪你好 89 00:07:08,541 --> 00:07:09,500 ‪是我生日吗? 90 00:07:10,375 --> 00:07:12,708 ‪你肯定是尼克·埃文斯 ‪尼克是你9点钟的客户 91 00:07:13,500 --> 00:07:14,375 ‪现在这就尴尬了 92 00:07:16,583 --> 00:07:20,291 ‪那么要我怎么帮你 埃文斯先生? 93 00:07:20,375 --> 00:07:22,083 ‪我需要一位律师 94 00:07:22,166 --> 00:07:25,583 ‪城里在公交车座椅上宣传的律师中 95 00:07:25,666 --> 00:07:27,125 ‪你在最优秀的那一群中 96 00:07:27,208 --> 00:07:28,916 ‪我从来没在公交座椅上做过广告 97 00:07:29,000 --> 00:07:30,375 ‪抱歉 那叫什么? 98 00:07:30,458 --> 00:07:32,875 ‪冷血讼棍律师?是这么称呼吗? 99 00:07:32,958 --> 00:07:35,500 ‪-民权律师就可以 ‪-民权律师 100 00:07:35,583 --> 00:07:37,625 ‪很酷 好的 你收费多少? 101 00:07:37,708 --> 00:07:40,500 ‪-我们先聊聊你的起诉 ‪-好的 102 00:07:45,291 --> 00:07:46,958 ‪我想控告恋爱保证 103 00:07:47,041 --> 00:07:48,875 ‪-那个约会网站? ‪-对 104 00:07:49,333 --> 00:07:51,791 ‪好的 你在约会时受到威胁了吗? 105 00:07:52,083 --> 00:07:53,208 ‪跟踪?伤害? 106 00:07:53,291 --> 00:07:55,083 ‪更糟 我是诈骗受害者 107 00:07:56,250 --> 00:07:58,708 ‪-你说什么? ‪-恋爱保证打着 108 00:07:58,791 --> 00:08:00,250 ‪“你会找到爱 保证”的旗号 109 00:08:00,333 --> 00:08:02,791 ‪每个月从每名用户那里 ‪抢劫29,95美元 110 00:08:03,000 --> 00:08:05,291 ‪我进行过986次不同的约会 111 00:08:05,375 --> 00:08:07,708 ‪没有一次向我证明爱的存在 112 00:08:07,958 --> 00:08:11,500 ‪986次约会… 113 00:08:12,125 --> 00:08:13,500 ‪跟真正的人类女人? 114 00:08:13,583 --> 00:08:16,416 ‪对 用户协议的附属细则称 115 00:08:16,500 --> 00:08:20,125 ‪一名用户必须进行1000次 ‪不同的约会才能获得保证 116 00:08:20,750 --> 00:08:23,375 ‪他们的律师显然觉得 ‪没人能做到 但是… 117 00:08:23,583 --> 00:08:24,458 ‪我做到了 118 00:08:26,083 --> 00:08:28,708 ‪反正进入冲刺阶段了 ‪我还有差不多12次 119 00:08:28,958 --> 00:08:30,166 ‪嗯 我就是… 120 00:08:30,666 --> 00:08:32,041 ‪有点想知道 121 00:08:32,250 --> 00:08:36,375 ‪你总共986次约会的细节 122 00:08:36,708 --> 00:08:38,125 ‪这怎么可能呢? 123 00:08:39,000 --> 00:08:42,166 ‪问得好 早餐 午餐和晚餐约会 124 00:08:43,000 --> 00:08:44,375 ‪-我就是这么做的 ‪-好吧 125 00:08:44,458 --> 00:08:45,500 ‪人总得吃饭 对吗? 126 00:08:45,583 --> 00:08:47,958 ‪你有没有想过也许 127 00:08:48,250 --> 00:08:51,166 ‪你永远找不到真爱 ‪因为没有女人想听到 128 00:08:51,375 --> 00:08:52,750 ‪“人总得吃饭 对吗?” 129 00:08:52,833 --> 00:08:56,208 ‪我约会的时候不会这么说 ‪我不会说:“嘿 人总得吃饭” 130 00:08:56,291 --> 00:08:59,541 ‪我不会那么说 ‪我没那么说过 我就在心里想 131 00:08:59,791 --> 00:09:02,166 ‪听我说 问题是 我有个官司 132 00:09:02,625 --> 00:09:04,250 ‪好吧 能赢的官司 133 00:09:04,333 --> 00:09:06,333 ‪我昨天没通过律师考试 134 00:09:06,916 --> 00:09:08,458 ‪我知道这是怎么回事 135 00:09:09,291 --> 00:09:10,208 ‪怎么回事? 136 00:09:10,500 --> 00:09:13,000 ‪这是经典的“逮到你了”诉讼 137 00:09:13,250 --> 00:09:15,291 ‪找个漏洞 轻松赚钱 138 00:09:16,041 --> 00:09:18,000 ‪想想你要什么 但恋爱保证 139 00:09:18,083 --> 00:09:20,458 ‪利用世界上孤独的灵魂赚钱 140 00:09:20,708 --> 00:09:21,666 ‪这不对 141 00:09:21,750 --> 00:09:23,958 ‪这是对人心的鲁莽伤害 142 00:09:24,041 --> 00:09:25,500 ‪我不会支持的 143 00:09:25,583 --> 00:09:27,250 ‪人心 对啊 144 00:09:27,333 --> 00:09:28,166 ‪很好 145 00:09:29,458 --> 00:09:32,333 ‪所以预付费用是多少? 146 00:09:32,750 --> 00:09:36,916 ‪首先我要对你的官司价值进行评估 147 00:09:37,000 --> 00:09:39,000 ‪请便 别花太久 148 00:09:40,458 --> 00:09:41,791 ‪非常确定你的团队 149 00:09:41,916 --> 00:09:44,583 ‪会想要拿回饮水机 150 00:10:05,833 --> 00:10:06,666 ‪情况怎么样? 151 00:10:06,750 --> 00:10:08,416 ‪有些人看起来可以喝杯鸡尾酒 152 00:10:08,500 --> 00:10:10,375 ‪-现在才9点15分 ‪-永远无法阻止我 153 00:10:10,458 --> 00:10:12,125 ‪哦 我们还有什么? 154 00:10:12,208 --> 00:10:13,708 ‪账单 账单 155 00:10:13,791 --> 00:10:15,791 ‪看看啊 更多账单 156 00:10:16,166 --> 00:10:18,916 ‪巴哈尔先生想再延期一个月付款 157 00:10:19,291 --> 00:10:22,083 ‪房东寄来一个看起来很吓人的信封 158 00:10:22,166 --> 00:10:25,750 ‪但我的确准备一些 ‪家居商城优惠券 所以不全是坏消息 159 00:10:25,833 --> 00:10:28,083 ‪-你是在做上帝的工作 丹妮丝 ‪-谢谢 160 00:10:28,291 --> 00:10:29,750 ‪他提高了租金 161 00:10:30,250 --> 00:10:31,208 ‪-又一次 ‪-这只是小问题 162 00:10:31,666 --> 00:10:32,583 ‪我们会没事的 163 00:10:33,708 --> 00:10:34,541 ‪说点什么 164 00:10:34,625 --> 00:10:35,875 ‪我们的金鱼还好吗? 165 00:10:36,291 --> 00:10:37,250 ‪他在睡觉 166 00:10:47,375 --> 00:10:48,208 ‪他在睡觉? 167 00:10:49,458 --> 00:10:50,875 ‪她对我了如指掌 168 00:10:52,458 --> 00:10:55,375 ‪为什么我感觉有一天 ‪我会看见你上法庭呢? 169 00:10:56,291 --> 00:10:57,875 ‪好吧 你感觉如何? 170 00:10:59,500 --> 00:11:01,583 ‪-我要死了 全身都疼 ‪-哦 好姐妹 171 00:11:01,958 --> 00:11:04,500 ‪我的容光焕发哪里去了? ‪有人保证我会容光焕发 172 00:11:04,583 --> 00:11:06,416 ‪-你看起来很棒 ‪-我胖了 173 00:11:06,666 --> 00:11:09,416 ‪但你看起来真的是很健康的胖 ‪你知道吗? 174 00:11:09,500 --> 00:11:10,791 ‪像个小牛油果 175 00:11:13,458 --> 00:11:16,625 ‪我用慢动作放下我的脱咖啡因咖啡 ‪你可别介意 176 00:11:17,041 --> 00:11:18,208 ‪约会网站? 177 00:11:18,291 --> 00:11:19,333 ‪为了一个官司 178 00:11:19,416 --> 00:11:21,833 ‪哇 你这么接到这个官司的 179 00:11:21,916 --> 00:11:23,000 ‪不 他就是客户 180 00:11:23,333 --> 00:11:25,166 ‪-火辣的客户 ‪-恶心的客户 181 00:11:25,250 --> 00:11:26,375 ‪火辣恶心的客户 182 00:11:26,458 --> 00:11:30,458 ‪讨厌 恶心 ‪只有某些绝望的女人觉得火辣的客户 183 00:11:30,541 --> 00:11:33,041 ‪反正还在审查客户的我不觉得 184 00:11:34,916 --> 00:11:36,166 ‪嘿 各位 185 00:11:36,833 --> 00:11:38,291 ‪-爸爸 ‪-谁想要班杰利? 186 00:11:38,750 --> 00:11:40,875 ‪别再孩子面前说 ‪否则我们必须分享 187 00:11:41,458 --> 00:11:43,958 ‪-分享什么? ‪-没什么 小子 过来 188 00:11:44,041 --> 00:11:46,125 ‪-他身上还残留着晚饭 ‪-是的 我看见了 189 00:11:46,958 --> 00:11:48,666 ‪好吧 洗澡了 儿子 快点 190 00:11:49,041 --> 00:11:50,416 ‪跟你苏珊阿姨击掌道晚安 191 00:11:51,041 --> 00:11:52,291 ‪好小子 晚安 192 00:11:52,875 --> 00:11:53,875 ‪你到底吃了什么? 193 00:11:54,958 --> 00:11:57,125 ‪我姐夫可能是个真正的圣人 194 00:11:58,875 --> 00:12:01,750 ‪圣吉迪恩 ‪并没有像冰冻的飞机马桶水一样 195 00:12:01,833 --> 00:12:03,625 ‪奇迹般地从天上掉下来 196 00:12:04,041 --> 00:12:04,875 ‪知道我们怎么认识的吗? 197 00:12:04,958 --> 00:12:06,666 ‪-我知道 在线约会 ‪-对 198 00:12:07,041 --> 00:12:10,083 ‪你相不相信 ‪这家伙马上要完成1000次约会了? 199 00:12:10,500 --> 00:12:13,208 ‪-你说真的吗? ‪-他是个钻空子的老手 200 00:12:13,541 --> 00:12:16,958 ‪他在公司细则的一个小细节上做文章 201 00:12:18,291 --> 00:12:20,000 ‪-有趣的官司 ‪-荒谬的官司 202 00:12:20,083 --> 00:12:22,541 ‪我是说 我的任务是帮助无助的人 203 00:12:22,625 --> 00:12:24,625 ‪他不是无助 他是无耻 204 00:12:25,500 --> 00:12:26,750 ‪无耻的人买单 205 00:12:27,833 --> 00:12:31,333 ‪也就是说我的雇员不用去找工作 206 00:12:32,000 --> 00:12:34,708 ‪罗伯托的电脑开着 ‪简历就显示在屏幕上 207 00:12:35,208 --> 00:12:36,291 ‪我帮他改了一个错误 208 00:12:38,250 --> 00:12:39,333 ‪你当然会改 209 00:13:04,041 --> 00:13:06,916 ‪-喂? ‪-埃文斯先生 嗨 我是苏珊·惠特克 210 00:13:09,583 --> 00:13:10,916 ‪我们明天可以开始 211 00:13:35,916 --> 00:13:36,791 ‪好的 各位 212 00:13:36,875 --> 00:13:39,500 ‪我们首先要做的是深入了解 213 00:13:39,583 --> 00:13:44,250 ‪尼古拉斯·埃文斯先生 ‪奇怪又丰富的约会生活 214 00:13:44,333 --> 00:13:45,958 ‪终于接到有意思的官司了 215 00:13:46,041 --> 00:13:48,458 ‪这个官司不会是轻松愉快的活 216 00:13:48,541 --> 00:13:50,958 ‪恋爱保证的拥有者不是别人 217 00:13:51,041 --> 00:13:52,416 ‪正是塔玛拉·泰勒 218 00:13:53,791 --> 00:13:54,791 ‪我们中大奖了 219 00:13:55,875 --> 00:13:57,125 ‪抱歉 蒂芙尼什么? 220 00:13:57,208 --> 00:13:59,583 ‪塔玛拉·泰勒 那位生活方式大师 221 00:13:59,666 --> 00:14:02,541 ‪让女人只吃泡过的杏仁 ‪然后蒸她们的… 222 00:14:02,625 --> 00:14:03,583 ‪我很忙 223 00:14:03,666 --> 00:14:07,500 ‪她是福布斯500强富豪 ‪也就是说她会请律师 224 00:14:07,583 --> 00:14:09,208 ‪我们的官司必须无懈可击 225 00:14:10,416 --> 00:14:13,708 ‪你们知道 ‪我一直期待着会一会恋爱保证 226 00:14:14,000 --> 00:14:16,000 ‪嗨 我是财务罗伯托 227 00:14:16,750 --> 00:14:18,250 ‪你要长篇大论进行演讲吗? 228 00:14:18,333 --> 00:14:21,208 ‪如果如果你那么做 ‪我必须先用洗手间 229 00:14:21,291 --> 00:14:23,000 ‪所有那些大公司肥猫 230 00:14:23,083 --> 00:14:26,083 ‪和他们价值200美元的发型 ‪以及他们的名表 231 00:14:26,166 --> 00:14:28,000 ‪他们甚至不知道被什么打击到 232 00:14:28,083 --> 00:14:29,125 ‪我应该走了 是吗? 233 00:14:29,208 --> 00:14:30,791 ‪-你该走了 ‪-不 好的 抱歉 234 00:14:30,875 --> 00:14:33,708 ‪没有长篇演讲 ‪要用洗手间请便 会议结束 235 00:14:33,791 --> 00:14:36,708 ‪这太让人兴奋了 为小人物发声 236 00:14:37,125 --> 00:14:39,541 ‪在线约会就是会让人心灵破碎 237 00:14:39,625 --> 00:14:41,833 ‪我不知道 很幸运我从来没尝试过 238 00:14:42,125 --> 00:14:43,166 ‪什么? 239 00:14:43,625 --> 00:14:45,750 ‪抱歉 你从来没有在网上约会过? 240 00:14:46,000 --> 00:14:46,916 ‪没有 有什么大不了? 241 00:14:47,000 --> 00:14:50,125 ‪你对这件事一无所知怎么能打赢官司 242 00:14:50,208 --> 00:14:51,458 ‪我们必须把你放到网上 243 00:14:51,541 --> 00:14:52,375 ‪-嗯 ‪-不要 244 00:14:53,000 --> 00:14:54,208 ‪不要 245 00:14:54,291 --> 00:14:55,583 ‪不要 我没时间约会 246 00:14:55,666 --> 00:14:57,375 ‪这不是约会 247 00:14:57,750 --> 00:14:59,875 ‪如果这是研究呢?你知道 248 00:14:59,958 --> 00:15:02,708 ‪可能会决定本案的成败 249 00:15:03,125 --> 00:15:04,583 ‪你在这里干什么? 250 00:15:04,666 --> 00:15:06,625 ‪-创建你的档案 ‪-我以为你的小便要憋不住了 251 00:15:06,708 --> 00:15:08,416 ‪-可以等等 ‪-这真有意思 252 00:15:09,208 --> 00:15:11,708 ‪好的 好啊 但听好了 ‪要让我先审查一遍 253 00:15:12,291 --> 00:15:13,291 ‪别写得太离谱了 254 00:15:13,375 --> 00:15:15,208 ‪别担心 我们明白 255 00:15:17,125 --> 00:15:19,541 ‪你们开心就好 ‪你们考虑用什么照片… 256 00:15:19,625 --> 00:15:20,541 ‪快走吧 257 00:15:22,583 --> 00:15:24,041 ‪哦 这个我喜欢 258 00:15:25,208 --> 00:15:26,041 ‪对吗? 259 00:15:26,125 --> 00:15:27,625 ‪-我不知道男人喜不喜欢 ‪-哦 260 00:15:28,541 --> 00:15:30,833 ‪既有用又有点奇怪 261 00:15:30,916 --> 00:15:33,958 ‪你详细记录了所有的约会情况 262 00:15:34,791 --> 00:15:37,666 ‪谢谢 我就想着需要纸质的证明 263 00:15:39,541 --> 00:15:41,375 ‪整夜谈论猫的女性? 264 00:15:41,458 --> 00:15:43,166 ‪对 她都不养猫 265 00:15:44,000 --> 00:15:46,083 ‪约会时带父母来的女性? 266 00:15:46,166 --> 00:15:48,833 ‪对 她一个字都没说 但她爸很棒 267 00:15:49,333 --> 00:15:52,625 ‪我们聊了好几个小时的棒球 ‪非常的棒 268 00:15:53,041 --> 00:15:54,375 ‪我希望我当时问他要号码了 269 00:15:54,458 --> 00:15:56,916 ‪需要对象 ‪一起参加她姐姐婚礼的女性? 270 00:15:57,291 --> 00:16:00,916 ‪对 两张去夏威夷的票 ‪对于约会备胎来说似乎有点多了 271 00:16:02,125 --> 00:16:04,416 ‪喝醉而且想和服务员打架的女性? 272 00:16:04,750 --> 00:16:06,416 ‪准确地说 我喝了潘趣酒 273 00:16:06,500 --> 00:16:09,666 ‪好的 尼克 你不能用《老友记》 ‪剧名的风格给女性取名字 274 00:16:09,750 --> 00:16:12,916 ‪这是区分她们的唯一办法 ‪你知道我跟多少个克洛伊约会过吗? 275 00:16:13,000 --> 00:16:13,833 ‪14个 276 00:16:14,208 --> 00:16:17,333 ‪再加上12个艾玛 还有6个佐伊 277 00:16:17,416 --> 00:16:20,666 ‪好吧 请有点责任感 ‪你是那个和很多人约会的人 278 00:16:21,375 --> 00:16:23,500 ‪你知道 这起官司不仅仅和我有关 279 00:16:23,833 --> 00:16:25,916 ‪恋爱保证也在利用她们 280 00:16:26,000 --> 00:16:27,375 ‪如果我们胜诉你打算怎么办? 281 00:16:27,500 --> 00:16:30,208 ‪你会跟一千位不同的女性 ‪分享赔偿金吗? 282 00:16:30,291 --> 00:16:31,666 ‪不 这笔钱的用途我有打算 283 00:16:31,750 --> 00:16:32,583 ‪我想也是 284 00:16:34,500 --> 00:16:37,375 ‪就告诉你 在她们面前 ‪我一直是一位完美绅士 285 00:16:37,458 --> 00:16:39,041 ‪我让这些女士有了优雅的约会 286 00:16:39,125 --> 00:16:40,541 ‪在丹尼斯餐厅各自付账? 287 00:16:40,625 --> 00:16:44,375 ‪不是说对它的大满贯早饭有意见 ‪但要给别人一点信任 好吗? 288 00:16:44,666 --> 00:16:48,500 ‪早饭在八客餐厅 中饭在粉门餐厅 ‪晚饭在珊瑚餐厅 289 00:16:48,583 --> 00:16:50,250 ‪珊瑚餐厅?那地方很赞 290 00:16:50,333 --> 00:16:52,375 ‪是的 每次都是我付钱 291 00:16:52,916 --> 00:16:54,000 ‪好吧 让我印象深刻 292 00:16:54,083 --> 00:16:56,416 ‪你真是时间管理大师 293 00:16:56,500 --> 00:16:58,791 ‪是吗?大多数约会都在一小时内 294 00:16:59,125 --> 00:17:00,250 ‪比换机油的时间都快 295 00:17:00,333 --> 00:17:01,500 ‪好吧 你有心吗? 296 00:17:01,583 --> 00:17:03,666 ‪或者那个位置是空的 ‪你用来放车钥匙? 297 00:17:04,916 --> 00:17:05,750 ‪对 是空的 298 00:17:08,250 --> 00:17:09,916 ‪-我得走了 ‪-燃情约会? 299 00:17:10,416 --> 00:17:11,583 ‪-对 ‪-什么? 300 00:17:11,666 --> 00:17:13,250 ‪那是个拙劣的笑话 ‪现在才早上10点 301 00:17:13,333 --> 00:17:15,416 ‪对 早饭 午饭和晚饭都约会 302 00:17:15,916 --> 00:17:16,750 ‪这个是早饭 303 00:17:29,000 --> 00:17:31,291 ‪你这个可怜可怜的姑娘 304 00:17:34,291 --> 00:17:37,291 ‪我知道我结婚了 ‪但我想在我的房间里看见她 305 00:17:37,375 --> 00:17:38,625 ‪为了做简报 306 00:17:41,541 --> 00:17:42,750 ‪他是一个机会主义者 307 00:17:42,833 --> 00:17:44,958 ‪接这个官司我们应该觉得羞耻 308 00:17:46,250 --> 00:17:48,458 ‪-喂 ‪-在这个游戏里一点都不丢人 309 00:17:49,000 --> 00:17:51,125 ‪贵重物品通过 310 00:17:52,791 --> 00:17:54,458 ‪我喜欢我们新的付钱客户 311 00:17:54,541 --> 00:17:55,666 ‪我们走着瞧 312 00:17:56,708 --> 00:17:58,166 ‪-那是什么? ‪-文件 313 00:17:58,250 --> 00:17:59,458 ‪尼克的约会资料 314 00:17:59,541 --> 00:18:00,833 ‪为了让这个官司起飞 315 00:18:01,375 --> 00:18:04,750 ‪所有人必须得到证实 ‪所以祝你们好运 316 00:18:08,041 --> 00:18:09,125 ‪新邮件 317 00:18:10,625 --> 00:18:11,500 ‪怎么回事? 318 00:18:11,958 --> 00:18:13,125 ‪我们刚刚上线 319 00:18:13,208 --> 00:18:15,708 ‪-你在说什么? ‪-你在恋爱保证上的收件箱 320 00:18:15,791 --> 00:18:17,833 ‪你们应该先让我审阅的 321 00:18:19,666 --> 00:18:21,458 ‪你们为什么要用这张照片? 322 00:18:21,541 --> 00:18:24,041 ‪这是我们能找到的 ‪唯一一张你没在工作的照片 323 00:18:24,125 --> 00:18:27,583 ‪那是我在托提拉弗拉特 ‪过生日的照片 烂醉如泥 324 00:18:28,125 --> 00:18:30,333 ‪喝醉的苏珊是充满魅力的苏珊 325 00:18:31,166 --> 00:18:33,083 ‪我真的用薯条来蘸蛋黄酱 326 00:18:34,291 --> 00:18:36,500 ‪我真的喜欢老狗胜过小狗 327 00:18:36,833 --> 00:18:39,000 ‪等等 你们怎么知道我的这些事? 328 00:18:39,083 --> 00:18:41,458 ‪-长时间的加班 ‪-我翻看过你的垃圾 329 00:18:41,708 --> 00:18:43,208 ‪它们就像跑道上的飞机一样闪闪发光 330 00:18:45,500 --> 00:18:47,375 ‪不行 不行 有可能 331 00:18:47,458 --> 00:18:49,583 ‪不 现在不行 不 332 00:18:49,666 --> 00:18:51,541 ‪我必须采访尼克的约会对象 ‪拿到证词 333 00:18:51,625 --> 00:18:55,000 ‪你自己约会的时候 ‪能做什么 研究 334 00:18:55,083 --> 00:18:58,000 ‪隔壁的杨先生愿意 ‪为你提供朋友和家人的午餐折扣 335 00:18:58,083 --> 00:18:59,083 ‪我真的很喜欢杨氏餐厅 336 00:18:59,666 --> 00:19:01,375 ‪他和我们一样奇怪 337 00:19:02,125 --> 00:19:03,083 ‪为了研究 338 00:19:07,208 --> 00:19:09,708 ‪这个穿法兰绒的怎么样? 339 00:19:10,291 --> 00:19:11,500 ‪看起来像伐木工人 340 00:19:12,000 --> 00:19:14,458 ‪-看起来像是受过教育的伐木工人 ‪-没有这种人 341 00:19:15,250 --> 00:19:17,583 ‪-伐木型男 ‪-哦 这个靠谱 342 00:19:20,583 --> 00:19:22,958 ‪你好 我叫苏珊·惠特克 343 00:19:23,041 --> 00:19:25,041 {\an8}‪我是本地律师 344 00:19:25,166 --> 00:19:28,958 {\an8}‪我就是想知道 ‪你和尼古拉斯·埃文斯约会过吗? 345 00:19:29,583 --> 00:19:33,000 ‪是的 我记得他 ‪因为他跟照片上看起来一样 346 00:19:33,750 --> 00:19:35,583 ‪有些约会对象和照片上不一样? 347 00:19:55,083 --> 00:19:55,916 ‪真的吗? 348 00:19:56,791 --> 00:19:57,875 ‪约会怎么样? 349 00:19:58,208 --> 00:20:01,166 {\an8}‪-是我经历过最好的约会 ‪-嗯 350 00:20:01,541 --> 00:20:03,166 {\an8}‪希望他当时问我要了号码 351 00:20:03,250 --> 00:20:07,000 {\an8}‪尼克是最棒的 ‪就是个心善的正常小伙 352 00:20:07,083 --> 00:20:08,708 {\an8}‪就是非常正常 353 00:20:08,791 --> 00:20:10,833 ‪有些约会对象不正常? 354 00:20:13,375 --> 00:20:16,166 ‪所以是间歇性断食吗? 355 00:20:16,750 --> 00:20:17,583 ‪对 356 00:20:18,416 --> 00:20:20,333 ‪你就是故意不吃东西? 357 00:20:21,000 --> 00:20:24,291 ‪-我现在每天断食20个小时 ‪-哇 358 00:20:26,000 --> 00:20:28,416 ‪这没有危险吗 或者… 359 00:20:28,500 --> 00:20:31,166 ‪不会 对你的健康很有益处 360 00:20:32,041 --> 00:20:33,166 ‪实际上… 361 00:20:40,833 --> 00:20:45,000 ‪穴居人就是这么…吃的 362 00:20:46,083 --> 00:20:49,208 ‪穴居人的预期寿命不是只有25岁吗? 363 00:20:52,125 --> 00:20:52,958 ‪买单 364 00:20:53,250 --> 00:20:55,833 ‪所以跟我聊聊 ‪你的约会对象尼克·埃文斯 365 00:20:56,375 --> 00:20:59,125 {\an8}‪约会不错 大那我知道他不适合我 ‪我能感觉到 366 00:20:59,208 --> 00:21:00,875 ‪哪种感觉? 367 00:21:00,958 --> 00:21:03,750 ‪就是尼克相信 他真的在寻找真爱 368 00:21:04,041 --> 00:21:06,375 ‪但他一直在努力证明真爱并不存在 369 00:21:10,291 --> 00:21:12,291 ‪那你找到人跟你一起参加婚礼了吗? 370 00:21:12,750 --> 00:21:13,916 ‪婚礼取消了 371 00:21:14,500 --> 00:21:17,458 ‪结果新郎爱上了我妈 不是我姐姐 372 00:21:17,541 --> 00:21:18,458 ‪是不是要死? 373 00:21:19,208 --> 00:21:22,208 ‪放假的时候你家肯定很有意思 374 00:21:22,291 --> 00:21:23,625 ‪至少尼克露面了 375 00:21:23,708 --> 00:21:25,791 ‪我前一个网上约会对象 ‪彻底跟我玩失踪 376 00:21:25,875 --> 00:21:27,958 ‪有些人就不露面吗? 377 00:21:44,791 --> 00:21:46,250 ‪(个人资料不可用) 378 00:21:49,291 --> 00:21:52,750 ‪各位 我不知道尼克是怎么做到的 379 00:21:53,041 --> 00:21:53,875 ‪我做不到 380 00:21:54,458 --> 00:21:57,875 ‪我约会了两个人 一个没出现 ‪我已经累死了 381 00:21:58,500 --> 00:22:02,208 ‪你为什么认为两周后 ‪我要向丹特求婚?外面是丛林 382 00:22:02,666 --> 00:22:06,041 ‪-海里的鱼多得是 ‪-也有很多垃圾 383 00:22:06,458 --> 00:22:08,333 ‪要尼克签字的宣誓书 384 00:22:08,416 --> 00:22:09,250 ‪我开车送过去 385 00:22:09,333 --> 00:22:11,625 ‪我可以发电子邮件 ‪他可以在网上签 386 00:22:11,708 --> 00:22:14,625 ‪你开玩笑吗? ‪我很好奇这家伙在哪里工作 387 00:22:14,708 --> 00:22:16,458 ‪我打赌他是混合健身教练 388 00:22:16,541 --> 00:22:19,000 ‪也许在停车场外面 ‪组织非法的扑克游戏 389 00:22:19,333 --> 00:22:20,750 ‪惊喜 你们两个都错了 390 00:22:31,625 --> 00:22:33,458 ‪(西雅图西部康复中心) 391 00:22:49,083 --> 00:22:52,333 ‪-加油 ‪-也许有人认为这是虐待老人 392 00:22:53,791 --> 00:22:56,083 ‪-再快点 好吗? ‪-好 393 00:22:57,583 --> 00:22:58,833 ‪一旦我能走路了 394 00:22:59,333 --> 00:23:01,791 ‪我要邀请那边的唐娜去跳舞 嘿 唐娜 395 00:23:02,583 --> 00:23:05,000 ‪你跳过阿根廷探戈吗? 396 00:23:06,583 --> 00:23:08,125 ‪小心点 她是母老虎 397 00:23:08,208 --> 00:23:09,916 ‪哦 有希望了 398 00:23:10,166 --> 00:23:11,458 ‪杰罗姆 你真调皮 399 00:23:16,375 --> 00:23:17,833 ‪等等 怎么… 400 00:23:19,166 --> 00:23:20,916 ‪怎么回事? 401 00:23:21,000 --> 00:23:23,291 ‪我的正义卫士 402 00:23:24,583 --> 00:23:26,916 ‪好的 所以很多事情最后都说得通了 403 00:23:29,333 --> 00:23:30,750 ‪我不知道你还上门服务 404 00:23:30,833 --> 00:23:33,000 ‪我就是来做尽职调查 405 00:23:33,083 --> 00:23:34,458 ‪对 调查我 406 00:23:34,541 --> 00:23:36,958 ‪-差不多吧 ‪-确保我是一个正直公民 407 00:23:37,333 --> 00:23:39,291 ‪他正在让我成为一个 ‪站得正直的公民 408 00:23:40,333 --> 00:23:42,000 ‪好的 喜剧演员 我们周四见 409 00:23:42,083 --> 00:23:44,083 ‪两秒后我和你见面 410 00:23:45,083 --> 00:23:47,791 ‪所以我是靠你找到新客户的 411 00:23:47,875 --> 00:23:49,458 ‪告诉你我不会忘记 412 00:23:49,541 --> 00:23:51,708 ‪把生意丢给你 惊喜吧? 413 00:23:52,208 --> 00:23:53,916 ‪尼克是个惊喜 414 00:23:54,166 --> 00:23:56,833 ‪医生说 我的舞台生涯结束了 415 00:23:57,208 --> 00:23:58,750 ‪尼克说 胡说八道 416 00:23:59,583 --> 00:24:01,208 ‪尼克把时间花在这里 417 00:24:01,291 --> 00:24:03,708 ‪为了像我这样 ‪负担不起物理治疗的老家伙 418 00:24:04,125 --> 00:24:06,208 ‪他是个好蛋 跟你一样 419 00:24:06,291 --> 00:24:07,916 ‪两个好蛋做成一个煎蛋卷 420 00:24:08,708 --> 00:24:09,541 ‪唐娜 421 00:24:13,375 --> 00:24:15,500 ‪好的 那么有什么事? 422 00:24:16,416 --> 00:24:19,208 ‪有些东西要你签字 423 00:24:20,416 --> 00:24:22,000 ‪即使底下这里 424 00:24:22,083 --> 00:24:23,083 ‪哦 猜怎么着? 425 00:24:23,166 --> 00:24:24,583 ‪-什么? ‪-就在明天 426 00:24:24,666 --> 00:24:26,041 ‪我的第1000次约会 427 00:24:27,125 --> 00:24:27,958 ‪-哇 ‪-是的 428 00:24:29,875 --> 00:24:31,333 ‪-恭喜你 ‪-谢谢 429 00:24:33,916 --> 00:24:36,666 ‪所以让我看看她的资料 430 00:24:37,250 --> 00:24:38,833 ‪-我的约会对象? ‪-是的 431 00:24:38,916 --> 00:24:41,875 ‪-我觉得这不是个好主意 ‪-为什么? 432 00:24:42,375 --> 00:24:44,291 ‪-我不知道 奇怪 ‪-为了官司 433 00:24:44,708 --> 00:24:45,958 ‪-为了官司? ‪-当然 434 00:24:46,541 --> 00:24:48,125 ‪当然 好的 那么… 435 00:24:49,291 --> 00:24:50,166 ‪这个 436 00:24:50,708 --> 00:24:52,000 ‪-这个?好的 ‪-往下拉 437 00:24:52,666 --> 00:24:53,541 ‪潘 438 00:24:54,541 --> 00:24:56,458 ‪潘32岁 439 00:24:56,875 --> 00:25:00,166 ‪她是五年级老师 喜欢远足和园艺 440 00:25:01,458 --> 00:25:02,625 ‪她看起来很讨人喜欢 441 00:25:02,708 --> 00:25:05,083 ‪讨人喜欢是头号危险信号 442 00:25:05,416 --> 00:25:08,416 ‪网上任何好得难以置信的东西 ‪都是谎言 443 00:25:08,500 --> 00:25:09,500 ‪这点我注意到了 444 00:25:09,583 --> 00:25:10,875 ‪嗯 那么祝我好运吧 445 00:25:10,958 --> 00:25:12,375 ‪似乎不合适 446 00:25:14,833 --> 00:25:15,666 ‪对 447 00:25:17,541 --> 00:25:19,166 ‪-因为官司 ‪-对 448 00:25:29,000 --> 00:25:33,125 ‪我不吃糖 醋 奶制品 ‪谷蛋白 瓜子或茄科蔬菜 449 00:25:37,000 --> 00:25:38,666 ‪等的时候来一杯酒怎么样? 450 00:25:38,750 --> 00:25:40,041 ‪请来一杯黑比诺 451 00:25:40,166 --> 00:25:42,083 ‪碧根果金枪鱼里面含坚果吗? 452 00:25:42,166 --> 00:25:44,166 ‪它是以碧根果包裹 453 00:25:45,208 --> 00:25:46,125 ‪对 454 00:25:47,125 --> 00:25:48,500 ‪最好拿整瓶的来 455 00:26:07,750 --> 00:26:08,583 ‪见鬼 456 00:26:14,708 --> 00:26:17,375 ‪说真的 这个菜单敢不敢 ‪再多放一些贝壳类的菜? 457 00:26:17,708 --> 00:26:21,541 ‪哪怕只吃了一个软体动物 ‪我也会像象人一样全身长满湿疹 458 00:26:21,625 --> 00:26:24,375 ‪你听说过贪婪的蛤蜊吗? 459 00:26:25,625 --> 00:26:26,958 ‪他就是一个小的软体动物 460 00:26:35,583 --> 00:26:36,666 ‪一个小软体动物 461 00:26:43,541 --> 00:26:44,458 ‪晚上好 462 00:26:49,333 --> 00:26:50,166 ‪几个人? 463 00:26:54,000 --> 00:26:54,833 ‪让人震惊 464 00:27:02,458 --> 00:27:05,375 ‪照烧鸡应该不错 ‪如果我带了过敏注射笔来 465 00:27:06,500 --> 00:27:07,500 ‪不过我没带 466 00:27:10,625 --> 00:27:13,375 ‪好的 去领英上找我 467 00:27:19,583 --> 00:27:22,166 ‪嘿 我认识你 468 00:27:24,291 --> 00:27:25,166 ‪苏珊 469 00:27:26,250 --> 00:27:27,166 ‪嘿 470 00:27:27,625 --> 00:27:29,375 ‪不 天哪 不 471 00:27:29,750 --> 00:27:30,625 ‪苏珊 472 00:27:37,208 --> 00:27:38,041 ‪苏珊 473 00:27:38,125 --> 00:27:39,125 ‪对 是我 474 00:27:39,833 --> 00:27:42,041 ‪是苏珊 各位 我们曾经约会过 475 00:27:42,791 --> 00:27:43,625 ‪我知道 476 00:27:45,000 --> 00:27:46,208 ‪-小心 ‪-我能否… 477 00:27:47,916 --> 00:27:48,750 ‪请你喝杯酒? 478 00:27:48,833 --> 00:27:51,250 ‪你在这里干什么? ‪你不是应该断食的吗? 479 00:27:55,541 --> 00:27:56,833 ‪现在是我吃东西的时段 480 00:27:56,916 --> 00:27:58,541 ‪闻起来是你喝酒的时段 481 00:27:59,250 --> 00:28:01,791 ‪也喝了一些酒 你知道 482 00:28:03,875 --> 00:28:06,916 ‪不 483 00:28:10,041 --> 00:28:11,083 ‪你能听我说话吗? 484 00:28:11,541 --> 00:28:13,541 ‪你需要三明治和睡眠 485 00:28:13,875 --> 00:28:16,166 ‪数到三 一 二… 486 00:28:23,875 --> 00:28:26,833 ‪也许我等下给你发私信 487 00:28:26,916 --> 00:28:27,750 ‪恶心 488 00:28:34,250 --> 00:28:37,125 ‪-那是谁? ‪-我的律师 489 00:28:41,833 --> 00:28:46,125 ‪我是说 这些女人 ‪她们可能会被传讯 490 00:28:46,208 --> 00:28:50,375 ‪我得确保你不是故意搞砸这些约会 491 00:28:50,458 --> 00:28:51,833 ‪-你一直在监视我 ‪-没有 492 00:28:52,250 --> 00:28:53,250 ‪-你就是 ‪-没有 493 00:28:54,208 --> 00:28:56,208 ‪有点吧 专业的 494 00:28:56,916 --> 00:28:59,375 ‪-“专业的” ‪-抱歉 我毁了你的约会 是吗? 495 00:28:59,458 --> 00:29:00,958 ‪没关系 本来就很糟糕 496 00:29:01,500 --> 00:29:02,625 ‪真的 她也知道 497 00:29:04,250 --> 00:29:06,000 ‪-你效率很高 尼克 ‪-不 我不是… 498 00:29:06,708 --> 00:29:07,791 ‪哦 随便了 499 00:29:08,208 --> 00:29:09,250 ‪你想点什么? 500 00:29:09,916 --> 00:29:10,750 ‪哦 我很好 501 00:29:10,833 --> 00:29:12,125 ‪-谢谢 ‪-请吧 502 00:29:12,458 --> 00:29:13,375 ‪我饿了 503 00:29:15,791 --> 00:29:16,916 ‪稍等 504 00:29:17,375 --> 00:29:19,791 ‪是的 珊瑚汉堡和炸薯条 谢谢 505 00:29:20,333 --> 00:29:21,583 ‪-就这些? ‪-是的 506 00:29:22,791 --> 00:29:24,000 ‪没有特别的要求? 507 00:29:24,416 --> 00:29:25,416 ‪多加蛋黄酱 508 00:29:26,916 --> 00:29:27,875 ‪我喜欢这个 509 00:29:31,000 --> 00:29:33,750 ‪这里就是一切发生的地方 510 00:29:34,125 --> 00:29:35,625 ‪对 这是我的幸运桌子 511 00:29:37,166 --> 00:29:38,000 ‪真的吗? 512 00:29:38,666 --> 00:29:39,791 ‪实际上不是 513 00:29:40,416 --> 00:29:42,500 ‪这桌子被诅咒了 我们坐其他地方去 514 00:29:42,583 --> 00:29:43,458 ‪-我们走 ‪-嗯 515 00:29:43,833 --> 00:29:45,833 ‪我唯一想做的就是打球 516 00:29:47,125 --> 00:29:50,625 ‪但然后我滑到本垒 前交叉韧带撕裂 517 00:29:52,625 --> 00:29:53,833 ‪你知道 这很好笑 518 00:29:54,666 --> 00:29:57,208 ‪一眨眼你的人生就改变了 519 00:29:58,666 --> 00:30:00,041 ‪太糟糕了 我很遗憾 520 00:30:00,750 --> 00:30:03,208 ‪唯一帮我度过难关的 ‪是我的物理理疗师拉希德 521 00:30:03,625 --> 00:30:05,416 ‪这家伙太逗了 522 00:30:06,000 --> 00:30:08,375 ‪他真的激励我 ‪去做艰苦的工作来治愈自己 523 00:30:08,458 --> 00:30:09,291 ‪很好 524 00:30:09,708 --> 00:30:11,791 ‪所以我决定自己成为物理理疗师 525 00:30:12,250 --> 00:30:13,166 ‪做同样的事 526 00:30:13,666 --> 00:30:14,833 ‪通过幽默获得灵感 527 00:30:14,916 --> 00:30:16,791 ‪不 我很刻薄 我大吼大叫 528 00:30:19,625 --> 00:30:21,166 ‪你呢?我打赌你是 529 00:30:21,250 --> 00:30:23,333 ‪-那种正义卫士 ‪-什么? 530 00:30:23,416 --> 00:30:26,875 ‪将社区里不公平的捉迷藏游戏终极 531 00:30:26,958 --> 00:30:28,208 ‪你怎么知道它们不公平? 532 00:30:29,666 --> 00:30:31,958 ‪不 我觉得你说的对 没错 533 00:30:32,041 --> 00:30:33,708 ‪我真觉得有些事情 534 00:30:33,791 --> 00:30:36,125 ‪自打我出生就固定下来 我就想 535 00:30:36,375 --> 00:30:37,666 ‪为小人物战斗 536 00:30:37,750 --> 00:30:39,458 ‪我很小的时候有一次 537 00:30:39,541 --> 00:30:41,458 ‪我父母带我去看电影《亡命天涯》 538 00:30:42,041 --> 00:30:44,291 ‪我非常伤心 539 00:30:44,375 --> 00:30:47,291 ‪他们给一个无辜的人定罪 ‪我现在还是很伤心 540 00:30:48,750 --> 00:30:50,833 ‪但我必须去大厅里等 无法忍受 541 00:30:52,416 --> 00:30:53,250 ‪你说真的? 542 00:30:53,333 --> 00:30:56,750 ‪我爸爸想让我回到影厅 但我做不到 543 00:30:56,916 --> 00:30:59,166 ‪所以我到现在还没看过结局 544 00:30:59,541 --> 00:31:01,125 ‪-你没看完《亡命天涯》? ‪-没有 545 00:31:01,250 --> 00:31:02,291 ‪你从来没看到过独臂人 546 00:31:02,375 --> 00:31:04,291 ‪如果是《亡命天涯》里面的 没有 547 00:31:05,208 --> 00:31:06,375 ‪在审判结束前 548 00:31:06,458 --> 00:31:08,458 ‪我们一起看《亡命天涯》如何? 549 00:31:08,958 --> 00:31:09,791 ‪这是约会 550 00:31:10,875 --> 00:31:12,458 ‪但…也不是 551 00:31:13,375 --> 00:31:15,125 ‪-我明白你的意思 对 ‪-你懂了 552 00:31:16,416 --> 00:31:17,250 ‪很好 553 00:31:21,750 --> 00:31:22,791 ‪实际上… 554 00:31:24,041 --> 00:31:26,541 ‪很长一段时间以来 ‪这是我吃过最棒的晚餐 555 00:31:28,416 --> 00:31:29,333 ‪我也一样 556 00:31:31,666 --> 00:31:35,250 ‪所以我的全部爱情生活你都了解了 557 00:31:36,166 --> 00:31:37,541 ‪为什么不告诉我你的? 558 00:31:38,500 --> 00:31:39,875 ‪没什么好说的 559 00:31:39,958 --> 00:31:41,416 ‪我觉得你这话不可信 560 00:31:42,250 --> 00:31:44,583 ‪我开了一家律师事务所 561 00:31:45,291 --> 00:31:48,500 ‪很多事情 我现在就是没时间 ‪维持一段关系 562 00:31:49,791 --> 00:31:52,333 ‪总有一天我会的 ‪但不是今天 563 00:31:54,166 --> 00:31:55,125 ‪还必须有个对象 564 00:31:55,708 --> 00:31:57,708 ‪当然得有个对象 565 00:31:58,166 --> 00:32:00,291 ‪当然 法学院的时候 他叫乔什 566 00:32:00,375 --> 00:32:04,041 ‪我们以为会结婚 ‪有小孩 养狗 所有的事 但… 567 00:32:04,958 --> 00:32:06,625 ‪我不知道 他有其他计划 568 00:32:08,750 --> 00:32:09,708 ‪哪种计划? 569 00:32:09,791 --> 00:32:12,625 ‪就是没有我的计划 570 00:32:15,875 --> 00:32:17,375 ‪说真的 你的车停的有多远? 571 00:32:17,458 --> 00:32:21,625 ‪好的 珊瑚餐厅的代客泊车? ‪12美元?简直是拦路抢劫 572 00:32:21,708 --> 00:32:22,541 ‪对 573 00:32:27,333 --> 00:32:28,375 ‪所以这是你的车 574 00:32:28,541 --> 00:32:30,208 ‪对 这是佐罗 575 00:32:30,500 --> 00:32:32,916 ‪-很好 佐罗 好甜蜜 ‪-甜蜜? 576 00:32:33,000 --> 00:32:37,416 ‪不 佐罗是打击残忍坏蛋的义侠 577 00:32:37,791 --> 00:32:39,875 ‪-比她的外面更强悍吗? ‪-是的 578 00:32:40,083 --> 00:32:42,041 ‪-我帮你开门吧 ‪-不用 我自己搞定 579 00:32:43,708 --> 00:32:44,583 ‪真的搞定了 580 00:32:47,583 --> 00:32:50,875 ‪你充满惊喜 581 00:32:51,333 --> 00:32:52,166 ‪你也是 582 00:32:55,000 --> 00:32:56,375 ‪-握手 ‪-对 583 00:32:57,083 --> 00:32:59,541 ‪这是我结束约会的标志性动作 584 00:33:00,250 --> 00:33:03,208 ‪这是我表达再见 祝你好运 ‪生活愉快的方式 585 00:33:04,375 --> 00:33:06,041 ‪所以是个很有效的方式 586 00:33:06,375 --> 00:33:07,208 ‪没错 587 00:33:08,791 --> 00:33:11,791 ‪那么告诉我 ‪如果你会按照《老友记》剧名的风格 588 00:33:11,875 --> 00:33:14,375 ‪给今晚的约会命名 ‪你会给我按什么头衔? 589 00:33:17,125 --> 00:33:18,541 ‪“我没想到会来的女性” 590 00:33:22,291 --> 00:33:23,166 ‪晚安 591 00:33:24,333 --> 00:33:25,333 ‪晚安 苏珊 592 00:33:38,375 --> 00:33:40,875 ‪-你车上那是谁的歌? ‪-哦 是蒂芙尼 593 00:33:41,416 --> 00:33:42,416 ‪-蒂芙尼? ‪-对 594 00:33:43,416 --> 00:33:44,375 ‪没听过 595 00:33:44,875 --> 00:33:45,708 ‪什么? 596 00:33:47,333 --> 00:33:50,083 ‪蒂芙尼 她是80年代 ‪最大牌的歌手之一 597 00:33:50,833 --> 00:33:53,250 ‪-哦 那个蒂芙尼啊 ‪-没错 蒂芙尼 598 00:33:53,333 --> 00:33:55,166 ‪对 还是不知道 我毫无头绪 599 00:33:55,250 --> 00:33:56,500 ‪你肯定有 就是… 600 00:33:57,750 --> 00:33:59,125 ‪你在开玩笑吗?我拿不准 601 00:34:00,000 --> 00:34:00,833 ‪有可能 602 00:34:01,291 --> 00:34:02,166 ‪晚安 尼克 603 00:34:03,041 --> 00:34:04,041 ‪晚安 蒂芙尼 604 00:34:18,500 --> 00:34:20,916 ‪卡普尔小姐 你可以自己叫灭虫员 605 00:34:21,833 --> 00:34:23,083 ‪对 绝对的 606 00:34:23,750 --> 00:34:26,583 ‪房客法规定 ‪你有权住一间没有害虫的公寓内 607 00:34:26,666 --> 00:34:27,500 ‪绝对… 608 00:34:29,000 --> 00:34:31,416 ‪好的 让我知道进展 卡小姐 609 00:34:31,500 --> 00:34:32,333 ‪谢谢 610 00:34:33,083 --> 00:34:35,750 ‪罗伯托 有种概念叫做敲门 611 00:34:35,916 --> 00:34:38,333 ‪-你握紧拳头 你往回拉… ‪-好的 好吧 612 00:34:39,750 --> 00:34:42,041 ‪-恋爱保证在二线 ‪-你可以接进来 613 00:34:44,291 --> 00:34:45,125 ‪苏珊·惠特克 614 00:34:48,500 --> 00:34:49,333 ‪嗯 615 00:34:51,541 --> 00:34:52,375 ‪啊哈 616 00:34:54,500 --> 00:34:55,666 ‪对 绝对的 617 00:34:57,166 --> 00:34:58,333 ‪我们很期待 618 00:35:01,250 --> 00:35:03,916 ‪比尔·琼斯打来的 ‪他是恋爱保证的首席律师 619 00:35:04,000 --> 00:35:07,166 ‪他邀请我们去他们总部 ‪和塔玛拉·泰勒 620 00:35:07,500 --> 00:35:08,666 ‪开会 621 00:35:33,583 --> 00:35:34,750 ‪看好了 622 00:35:37,291 --> 00:35:39,291 ‪(恋爱保证 在线) 623 00:35:39,416 --> 00:35:41,208 ‪哦 温馨 624 00:35:41,541 --> 00:35:42,375 ‪对吗? 625 00:35:44,708 --> 00:35:48,208 ‪嗨 苏珊·惠特克 ‪和尼古拉斯·埃文斯找塔玛拉·泰勒 626 00:35:48,666 --> 00:35:51,125 ‪请在这里签名 四楼顶层公寓 627 00:35:52,333 --> 00:35:55,916 ‪对 布拉德和维罗妮卡 ‪是在恋爱保证认识的 628 00:35:57,166 --> 00:35:59,083 ‪布拉德和维罗妮卡显然是模特 629 00:36:00,250 --> 00:36:02,333 ‪他们很有吸引力 630 00:36:02,416 --> 00:36:04,500 ‪并不意味着他们是付费模特 631 00:36:04,583 --> 00:36:07,083 ‪你对这个世界上 ‪任何好的东西没信心吗? 632 00:36:07,708 --> 00:36:10,041 ‪当然有 但对布拉德和维罗妮卡没有 633 00:36:11,125 --> 00:36:12,666 ‪他们是虚假的 伪造的 634 00:36:13,666 --> 00:36:15,666 ‪看看他们的牙齿 太白 635 00:36:18,083 --> 00:36:19,625 ‪到之前定一下基本规矩 636 00:36:19,708 --> 00:36:24,000 ‪我来说话 你 ‪不要咆哮 不要窃笑 不要哼哼 637 00:36:24,875 --> 00:36:25,750 ‪哼哼? 638 00:36:26,375 --> 00:36:29,375 ‪对 当你想忍住笑 ‪你就发出那种声音 有点像… 639 00:36:30,458 --> 00:36:32,333 ‪-这个声音一点不像我 ‪-就是你 640 00:36:32,416 --> 00:36:33,833 ‪-不是 ‪-我们走着瞧 641 00:36:39,000 --> 00:36:39,916 ‪惠特克小姐 642 00:36:40,833 --> 00:36:43,375 ‪-比尔·琼斯 ‪-我的客户 尼克·埃文斯 643 00:36:46,916 --> 00:36:47,750 ‪请吧 644 00:36:50,125 --> 00:36:50,958 ‪好 645 00:36:57,833 --> 00:36:58,916 ‪我们准备好见她了 646 00:37:10,500 --> 00:37:13,166 ‪扎西德勒 你们去哪里啊 ‪西藏打招呼的方式 合十礼 647 00:37:13,500 --> 00:37:14,833 ‪有人给你们倒喝的了吗? 648 00:37:14,916 --> 00:37:17,541 ‪经过过滤的溪水? ‪我从智利空运过来的 649 00:37:17,958 --> 00:37:18,958 ‪我很好 650 00:37:19,458 --> 00:37:20,916 ‪-我们很好 ‪-弥迦 给他们端水 651 00:37:25,291 --> 00:37:26,125 ‪好 652 00:37:27,791 --> 00:37:30,375 ‪我很震惊也很失望 听说 653 00:37:30,458 --> 00:37:32,375 ‪你对恋爱保证不满 654 00:37:32,833 --> 00:37:36,666 ‪根据《欺诈贸易行为法》 655 00:37:36,750 --> 00:37:39,125 ‪公司不得为了推销产品 656 00:37:39,541 --> 00:37:42,500 ‪进行虚假宣传和诱骗广告 657 00:37:42,583 --> 00:37:46,208 ‪以及其他欺诈行为 658 00:37:46,291 --> 00:37:47,583 ‪所以…我们来了 659 00:37:47,666 --> 00:37:50,458 ‪惠特克小姐 ‪你去过西藏的班公错吗? 660 00:37:51,333 --> 00:37:52,166 ‪没有 661 00:37:52,833 --> 00:37:54,916 ‪那是一个能改变人的地方 662 00:37:55,000 --> 00:37:58,333 ‪我去了两个人 赤足在高原上行走 663 00:37:58,416 --> 00:37:59,458 ‪扪心自问 664 00:37:59,541 --> 00:38:01,041 ‪“我在世界上的目的是什么?” 665 00:38:01,541 --> 00:38:04,500 ‪有一天 一只寂寞的小鸟 ‪从空中俯冲而过 666 00:38:04,583 --> 00:38:08,041 ‪我的内心深处感到了孤独 ‪我开始思考 667 00:38:08,666 --> 00:38:10,000 ‪“我要解决孤独的问题” 668 00:38:10,666 --> 00:38:14,166 ‪我的网站给大众带来了希望 恋爱 669 00:38:14,250 --> 00:38:17,458 ‪联系 快乐 幸福 生活 670 00:38:17,541 --> 00:38:21,416 ‪只不过你不是在兜售 ‪恋爱 欢乐和希望 671 00:38:21,500 --> 00:38:23,750 ‪你是在兜售恋爱保证 672 00:38:24,208 --> 00:38:27,958 ‪这里的每个人都知道 ‪这种语言是有法律约束力的 673 00:38:28,833 --> 00:38:29,666 ‪所以 674 00:38:30,000 --> 00:38:33,333 ‪我们有个官司 你们都知道了 ‪你们能提供什么? 675 00:38:35,416 --> 00:38:36,250 ‪比尔? 676 00:38:37,666 --> 00:38:42,166 ‪我们可以提供一个 ‪非常丰厚的和解条件 677 00:38:43,041 --> 00:38:46,583 ‪签下保密协议 就能拿10万美金 678 00:38:46,875 --> 00:38:48,250 ‪我们今天就能付款 679 00:38:48,333 --> 00:38:51,875 ‪10万美元都不够支付 680 00:38:51,958 --> 00:38:53,250 ‪我客户约会的花费 681 00:38:53,625 --> 00:38:56,166 ‪我们要求50万美元的赔偿 682 00:38:56,250 --> 00:38:59,833 ‪你们公司还要承诺 ‪从网站和广告中撤下 683 00:38:59,916 --> 00:39:01,916 ‪所有语言种类的恋爱保证字样 684 00:39:02,000 --> 00:39:05,208 ‪而且很明显在我的客户 ‪签署任何保密协议前 我都要审查 685 00:39:05,833 --> 00:39:08,500 ‪抱歉 这不是讨价还价 686 00:39:08,583 --> 00:39:11,291 ‪我们调查过你 惠特克小姐 我们发现 687 00:39:11,375 --> 00:39:14,875 ‪你热心的精品小律所举步维艰 ‪你正在坠落 688 00:39:15,708 --> 00:39:16,750 ‪这种爱做好事小善意 689 00:39:16,833 --> 00:39:19,625 ‪正义卫士的态度 ‪可能会给你的客户留下深刻印象 690 00:39:19,708 --> 00:39:21,708 ‪但对我没有任何效果 691 00:39:22,625 --> 00:39:23,625 ‪我… 692 00:39:25,250 --> 00:39:28,916 ‪幸运的是 ‪我们在这里不是谈我的情况 693 00:39:29,000 --> 00:39:31,000 ‪我们来是讨论这个官司的 694 00:39:31,083 --> 00:39:32,708 ‪那么接受和解 695 00:39:33,500 --> 00:39:34,583 ‪机会就这么一次 696 00:39:34,666 --> 00:39:35,541 ‪佛曰 697 00:39:36,041 --> 00:39:38,166 ‪“没人可以踏进同一条河两次” 698 00:39:40,416 --> 00:39:41,625 ‪你知道为什么我雇苏珊吗? 699 00:39:41,708 --> 00:39:44,166 ‪-尼克 不要 ‪-因为她和你正好相反 700 00:39:44,458 --> 00:39:45,291 ‪好吗? 701 00:39:45,916 --> 00:39:49,041 ‪她有个性有原则 702 00:39:49,708 --> 00:39:51,375 ‪还知道基本的礼节 703 00:39:51,791 --> 00:39:52,625 ‪谢谢 704 00:39:53,125 --> 00:39:55,333 ‪我有10亿美元的帝国要打理 705 00:39:55,416 --> 00:39:57,541 ‪所以签了吧 我们付钱让你们走人 706 00:39:57,625 --> 00:39:59,333 ‪这个小公关麻烦也烟消云散了 707 00:40:08,208 --> 00:40:09,041 ‪不行 708 00:40:10,333 --> 00:40:12,458 ‪我们法庭上见 709 00:40:12,541 --> 00:40:16,166 ‪到时候我们的赔偿金会是100万美元 710 00:40:16,625 --> 00:40:18,541 ‪哦 顺便提下 711 00:40:18,625 --> 00:40:20,541 ‪那句话是赫拉克利特说的 不是佛陀 712 00:40:21,083 --> 00:40:21,916 ‪什么? 713 00:40:22,000 --> 00:40:23,875 ‪那个什么河的?对 714 00:40:24,416 --> 00:40:28,750 ‪那些鼓舞人心的冰箱贴 ‪上面有非常小的字 715 00:40:29,208 --> 00:40:31,083 ‪真的要仔细读 716 00:40:33,708 --> 00:40:34,541 ‪砰 717 00:40:36,083 --> 00:40:37,541 ‪这个水好难喝 718 00:40:43,375 --> 00:40:44,625 ‪他们盯着我们吗? 719 00:40:46,750 --> 00:40:47,666 ‪对 所有人 720 00:40:48,000 --> 00:40:49,625 ‪-应该走楼梯的 ‪-对 721 00:41:01,250 --> 00:41:03,250 ‪-什么?我是说… ‪-那个… 722 00:41:04,958 --> 00:41:08,041 ‪不管怎么样 ‪谁想出恋爱保证这个愚蠢的主意的? 723 00:41:08,291 --> 00:41:09,541 ‪我今天要解雇谁? 724 00:41:11,333 --> 00:41:12,541 ‪你 725 00:41:13,125 --> 00:41:14,000 ‪弥迦 你被解雇了 726 00:41:17,333 --> 00:41:18,875 ‪-真棒 ‪-如果塔玛拉·泰勒觉得 727 00:41:18,958 --> 00:41:21,458 ‪她能把我们压得喘不过气来 ‪她应该再想想 728 00:41:21,541 --> 00:41:24,375 ‪嗯…考虑 729 00:41:25,041 --> 00:41:27,041 ‪-再考虑 ‪-不 想想 就是 730 00:41:27,250 --> 00:41:28,291 ‪再想想 731 00:41:29,375 --> 00:41:31,083 ‪不 考虑 732 00:41:31,583 --> 00:41:33,041 ‪你老是要争个对错吗? 733 00:41:33,125 --> 00:41:34,875 ‪在其他人错的情况下 734 00:41:42,000 --> 00:41:44,000 ‪嘿 谢谢 735 00:41:44,916 --> 00:41:47,791 ‪刚才为我挺身而出 ‪真的对我意义重大 736 00:41:48,875 --> 00:41:51,375 ‪你整天为其他人挺身而出 ‪得有人做你的后援 737 00:41:55,916 --> 00:41:57,791 ‪你真的喜欢那首歌 是吗? 738 00:41:59,041 --> 00:42:02,375 ‪实际上是磁带卡在播放器里了 739 00:42:02,458 --> 00:42:04,666 ‪-对 ‪-从80年代到现在 740 00:42:05,125 --> 00:42:07,375 ‪音量旋钮也坏了 741 00:42:07,666 --> 00:42:10,041 ‪所以佐罗自行决定 ‪什么时候播 什么时候停 742 00:42:11,625 --> 00:42:13,291 ‪所以你的车被蒂芙尼占据了 743 00:42:13,375 --> 00:42:14,833 ‪-基本上是的 ‪-太棒了 744 00:42:15,666 --> 00:42:18,833 ‪-你为什么不送去修? ‪-哦 它在我的待办清单上 745 00:42:19,458 --> 00:42:20,291 ‪谢谢 746 00:42:20,500 --> 00:42:21,625 ‪你的清单有多长? 747 00:42:23,291 --> 00:42:24,250 ‪你有时间听吗? 748 00:42:31,083 --> 00:42:32,375 ‪所以苏珊说 749 00:42:32,458 --> 00:42:34,666 ‪“不是佛陀 是赫拉克利特说的” 750 00:42:35,166 --> 00:42:36,583 ‪-那是谁? ‪-不知道 751 00:42:36,958 --> 00:42:38,958 ‪重点是 她太棒了 752 00:42:39,208 --> 00:42:42,291 ‪我是说 我这辈子没见过这样的人 753 00:42:42,708 --> 00:42:45,916 ‪她美丽 她沉着 754 00:42:46,000 --> 00:42:49,125 ‪你知道 对于一个 ‪约会过1000次的男人来说 755 00:42:49,416 --> 00:42:50,750 ‪你是零游戏那方 756 00:42:51,708 --> 00:42:53,083 ‪你在说什么? 757 00:42:53,583 --> 00:42:54,916 ‪我在说苏珊 758 00:42:55,208 --> 00:42:57,750 ‪苏…不 759 00:42:57,833 --> 00:42:58,708 ‪苏珊… 760 00:42:59,541 --> 00:43:02,750 ‪那是我的律师 她…不行 免谈 761 00:43:03,125 --> 00:43:05,833 ‪上次我查看 她首先是个女人 762 00:43:06,041 --> 00:43:09,000 ‪一位聪明美丽有激情恶女人 763 00:43:14,375 --> 00:43:16,666 ‪我不知道 杰罗姆 那是… 764 00:43:16,750 --> 00:43:17,958 ‪什么让你犹豫不前? 765 00:43:18,375 --> 00:43:21,833 ‪你刚完成1000次约会 ‪你害怕再多一次吗? 766 00:43:23,041 --> 00:43:25,250 ‪对 但苏珊跟其他人不一样 767 00:43:25,791 --> 00:43:26,625 ‪没错 768 00:43:27,750 --> 00:43:28,583 ‪很可怕吧? 769 00:43:29,958 --> 00:43:32,708 ‪你一直在浅水区游 很安全 770 00:43:32,916 --> 00:43:34,791 ‪但在那里你找不到真爱 771 00:43:35,083 --> 00:43:37,750 ‪要找到真爱 你得去深水区 772 00:43:40,916 --> 00:43:41,916 ‪如果我淹死了呢? 773 00:43:43,041 --> 00:43:44,083 ‪如果你会游泳呢? 774 00:43:58,041 --> 00:43:59,375 ‪苏珊·惠特克? 775 00:43:59,750 --> 00:44:01,416 ‪查尔斯·吉尔伯特 《西雅图差报》 776 00:44:01,500 --> 00:44:03,083 ‪你计划要怎么拿下恋爱保证? 777 00:44:03,166 --> 00:44:05,250 ‪你真觉得尼克·埃文斯有证据? 778 00:44:06,041 --> 00:44:07,666 ‪-你从哪里听说我… ‪-这周新闻不多 779 00:44:07,750 --> 00:44:09,666 ‪我一直在翻法庭的案卷 中奖 780 00:44:09,750 --> 00:44:12,875 ‪前职业球员起诉一家约会网站 ‪这个大家会感兴趣 781 00:44:14,583 --> 00:44:15,625 ‪无可奉告 782 00:44:16,041 --> 00:44:17,708 ‪惠特克小姐 再给我点时间… 783 00:44:18,583 --> 00:44:21,000 ‪一名记者刚刚跟我聊尼克的官司 784 00:44:21,083 --> 00:44:22,666 ‪我知道 难道不让人兴奋吗? 785 00:44:22,916 --> 00:44:24,708 ‪-你怎么说? ‪-无可奉告 786 00:44:25,083 --> 00:44:26,166 ‪非常酷 787 00:44:26,708 --> 00:44:29,625 ‪但听好了 ‪我们需要集中精神准备审判的事 788 00:44:29,708 --> 00:44:31,458 ‪而不是在媒体前玩弄这个官司 789 00:44:31,541 --> 00:44:33,541 ‪你真是无趣 比尔·琼斯打过电话来 790 00:44:34,125 --> 00:44:35,458 ‪我们定了开庭日期 791 00:44:37,041 --> 00:44:38,458 ‪只有六周了 792 00:44:38,833 --> 00:44:40,791 ‪好的 我们能做到 我们必须全力以赴 793 00:44:40,875 --> 00:44:42,375 ‪晚上和周末都要加班 794 00:44:44,583 --> 00:44:46,958 ‪丹妮丝 海鹰队比赛时点亮蜡烛 795 00:44:47,041 --> 00:44:48,208 ‪为球队付出一切 796 00:44:54,541 --> 00:44:55,750 ‪海鹰队 797 00:45:20,458 --> 00:45:21,458 ‪加油 集中精神 798 00:45:56,333 --> 00:45:57,958 ‪哦 你去哪里 老大? 799 00:45:58,041 --> 00:46:01,125 ‪恋爱保证绝对会追着尼克的性格打 800 00:46:01,208 --> 00:46:03,166 ‪我们负担不起任何惊喜 801 00:46:03,250 --> 00:46:05,041 ‪所以我到网上搜索了一下 802 00:46:05,625 --> 00:46:06,625 ‪你发现黑料了? 803 00:46:06,708 --> 00:46:09,708 ‪我不希望你那么做 ‪但老实说 我喜欢黑料 804 00:46:09,791 --> 00:46:10,916 ‪是的 所以 看 805 00:46:11,625 --> 00:46:15,083 ‪尼克已经退出所有社交媒体了 ‪但我还是找到一些踪迹 806 00:46:15,916 --> 00:46:17,375 ‪她的名字叫阿丽安娜·西尔弗 807 00:46:18,083 --> 00:46:20,333 ‪-她不在那1000个约会对象里 ‪-是的 808 00:46:21,041 --> 00:46:23,250 ‪我们要确保胜利 所以… 809 00:46:23,833 --> 00:46:25,500 ‪我今天要去和她见面 810 00:46:26,083 --> 00:46:28,291 ‪-天哪 她很美 ‪-我想也是 811 00:46:28,375 --> 00:46:31,125 ‪如果你喜欢超模的话 812 00:46:31,583 --> 00:46:32,833 ‪-大家都喜欢 ‪-大多数人都喜欢 813 00:46:32,916 --> 00:46:33,916 ‪好的 把电话还给我 814 00:46:37,625 --> 00:46:38,458 ‪干吗? 815 00:47:33,041 --> 00:47:33,875 ‪见鬼 816 00:47:35,625 --> 00:47:37,500 ‪嗨 你肯定是苏珊 817 00:47:38,333 --> 00:47:39,208 ‪我是阿丽安娜 818 00:47:47,833 --> 00:47:48,958 ‪-谢谢 ‪-谢谢 819 00:47:51,791 --> 00:47:53,166 ‪尼克·埃文斯 820 00:47:53,625 --> 00:47:56,458 ‪我有段时间没听过这个名字了 ‪小尼怎么样? 821 00:47:56,875 --> 00:47:58,416 ‪尼克很好 822 00:47:59,208 --> 00:48:00,833 ‪他正在起诉一家约会网站 823 00:48:00,916 --> 00:48:01,916 ‪指控后者虚假宣传 824 00:48:02,000 --> 00:48:04,375 ‪如同我在电话里跟你说的 ‪我是他的律师 825 00:48:04,458 --> 00:48:05,500 ‪听起来是尼克的风格 826 00:48:05,833 --> 00:48:07,250 ‪总是要把骗子揪出来 827 00:48:11,125 --> 00:48:15,083 ‪反正我在调查他的约会史 828 00:48:16,375 --> 00:48:19,375 ‪分手后我就没有听到他的消息了 ‪他分得很坚决 829 00:48:20,625 --> 00:48:21,458 ‪非常坚决 830 00:48:21,916 --> 00:48:24,333 ‪所以你没有跟他保持联系 831 00:48:25,208 --> 00:48:26,791 ‪我们是两年前分手的 832 00:48:27,958 --> 00:48:30,083 ‪我的错 最后很不好看 833 00:48:31,500 --> 00:48:32,791 ‪从那以后就没联系过 834 00:48:33,875 --> 00:48:36,541 ‪对 但你说两年 835 00:48:39,500 --> 00:48:42,375 ‪谢谢你和我见面 ‪你们的关系发生在我的官司之前 836 00:48:45,750 --> 00:48:46,625 ‪等等 837 00:48:47,750 --> 00:48:49,125 ‪如果尼克没跟你说起过我 838 00:48:49,791 --> 00:48:50,791 ‪你怎么找到我的? 839 00:48:51,250 --> 00:48:53,666 ‪就是一些旧的社交媒体账号 840 00:48:54,083 --> 00:48:55,500 ‪你一直在深挖 841 00:48:56,875 --> 00:48:58,916 ‪为了办案 当然 842 00:48:59,000 --> 00:48:59,833 ‪当然 843 00:49:01,208 --> 00:49:02,541 ‪我自己出去吧 844 00:49:06,625 --> 00:49:07,458 ‪厨房 845 00:49:40,041 --> 00:49:41,208 ‪(你起来了吗?) 846 00:49:47,125 --> 00:49:49,666 ‪(你在跟我求欢吗?) 847 00:49:52,333 --> 00:49:55,291 ‪(不 为什么?我做了什么?) 848 00:49:56,708 --> 00:49:57,541 ‪哦 不 849 00:50:05,125 --> 00:50:05,958 ‪喂? 850 00:50:06,291 --> 00:50:08,250 ‪现在还有秘密短信代码了? 851 00:50:09,291 --> 00:50:11,791 ‪你现在有两个 ‪差不多三个网上约会对象了 852 00:50:11,875 --> 00:50:14,083 ‪-你还没学会这些黑话吗? ‪-显然没有 853 00:50:14,166 --> 00:50:20,916 ‪我就是想知道如果你醒了 ‪要给你探讨几件事 854 00:50:21,875 --> 00:50:23,875 ‪探讨…等等 你还在工作吗? 855 00:50:24,541 --> 00:50:25,375 ‪所以呢? 856 00:50:25,750 --> 00:50:27,750 ‪你不是一个正常的人类 857 00:50:28,166 --> 00:50:29,458 ‪好吧 那么明天怎么样? 858 00:50:29,833 --> 00:50:30,833 ‪明天是周六 859 00:50:31,458 --> 00:50:32,375 ‪你想说什么? 860 00:50:35,833 --> 00:50:37,375 ‪我想说的是明天是周六 861 00:50:38,541 --> 00:50:40,500 ‪吃纸的女性 862 00:50:40,875 --> 00:50:42,458 ‪-对 所有类型 ‪-什么? 863 00:50:42,708 --> 00:50:45,708 ‪-不 ‪-是的 餐巾纸 厕纸 864 00:50:47,916 --> 00:50:49,333 ‪-纸牌 ‪-不 865 00:50:49,625 --> 00:50:51,833 ‪不开玩笑 折纸… 866 00:50:52,125 --> 00:50:53,583 ‪我不相信你 867 00:50:53,666 --> 00:50:57,333 ‪但我很期待 ‪和这个可能是虚构的人见面 868 00:51:02,583 --> 00:51:05,666 ‪你不是我认为那种虚伪的骗子 869 00:51:05,958 --> 00:51:06,958 ‪-哦 是吗? ‪-嗯 870 00:51:07,416 --> 00:51:09,833 ‪你也不是我以为的 ‪那种脾气不好的律师 871 00:51:11,583 --> 00:51:13,208 ‪很高兴自己错了一次 872 00:51:13,958 --> 00:51:15,333 ‪错了?好吧 873 00:51:15,625 --> 00:51:18,250 ‪-就享受其中吧 抱歉 ‪-嗯 那么… 874 00:51:20,000 --> 00:51:21,666 ‪但你也许有那么一点是对的 875 00:51:23,125 --> 00:51:23,958 ‪哦 是吗? 876 00:51:26,375 --> 00:51:29,791 ‪我早上起床的第一件事是查看手机 877 00:51:30,125 --> 00:51:32,500 ‪甚至在起床前就回复邮件 878 00:51:33,000 --> 00:51:34,375 ‪整天泡在办公室 879 00:51:34,916 --> 00:51:38,541 ‪然后我回家 ‪做完所有在办公室没做完的事 880 00:51:38,625 --> 00:51:40,000 ‪然后我上床 881 00:51:40,708 --> 00:51:42,083 ‪带着我的手机 882 00:51:43,458 --> 00:51:47,000 ‪然后又再来一遍 这是恶性周期 883 00:51:49,166 --> 00:51:50,000 ‪循环 884 00:51:51,416 --> 00:51:52,958 ‪-什么? ‪-这是恶性循环 885 00:51:53,041 --> 00:51:55,416 ‪-是这么说的 ‪-不 是恶性周期 886 00:51:55,833 --> 00:51:57,833 ‪-恶性周期?听起来像… ‪-是的 887 00:51:58,500 --> 00:52:00,083 ‪几何老师的摇滚乐队 888 00:52:01,791 --> 00:52:03,500 ‪恶性周期乐队 889 00:52:07,041 --> 00:52:08,125 ‪你怎么发现的? 890 00:52:09,500 --> 00:52:12,041 ‪她告诉我的 ‪她说她有一个想象中的朋友 891 00:52:12,250 --> 00:52:14,625 ‪她带着他去任何地方 ‪带他去参加约会 892 00:52:14,708 --> 00:52:16,083 ‪我希望他过得愉快 893 00:52:16,166 --> 00:52:18,500 ‪她说他很愉快 他什么都没吃 894 00:52:20,375 --> 00:52:23,625 ‪哇 你有足够一星期的食物 895 00:52:24,083 --> 00:52:25,041 ‪没错 896 00:52:25,125 --> 00:52:28,208 ‪这样做 在下个周末之前 ‪我就不用想着订购食物 897 00:52:28,291 --> 00:52:29,333 ‪我喜欢你的逻辑 898 00:52:31,000 --> 00:52:32,125 ‪我也喜欢你的家 899 00:52:32,208 --> 00:52:33,333 ‪-谢谢 ‪-很好 900 00:52:33,416 --> 00:52:36,166 ‪吉迪恩的家族实际上拥有这座大楼 901 00:52:36,583 --> 00:52:40,666 ‪他是世界上最慷慨的姐夫 ‪也是最糟糕的房东 902 00:52:40,750 --> 00:52:41,958 ‪如果我自己不提房租 903 00:52:42,041 --> 00:52:44,375 ‪我想他可能会让我免费住 904 00:52:46,791 --> 00:52:49,750 ‪要跟你说件事 905 00:52:53,333 --> 00:52:55,166 ‪我去见了阿丽安娜 906 00:52:56,250 --> 00:52:59,125 ‪但我意识到 ‪你们的关系在我们官司之前 907 00:52:59,208 --> 00:53:00,041 ‪我就离开了 908 00:53:00,416 --> 00:53:02,750 ‪好的 但你不需要我 909 00:53:03,208 --> 00:53:06,750 ‪到处扒前女友的旧伤口 910 00:53:07,708 --> 00:53:08,541 ‪对不起 911 00:53:10,833 --> 00:53:11,833 ‪未婚妻 912 00:53:12,083 --> 00:53:13,583 ‪-什么? ‪-对 913 00:53:15,416 --> 00:53:19,583 ‪离我们的婚礼还有两个月 ‪当我在工作的时候 914 00:53:20,958 --> 00:53:21,791 ‪她突然起身离开了 915 00:53:23,000 --> 00:53:25,666 ‪没有警告 没有信件 916 00:53:28,291 --> 00:53:31,833 ‪对 结果就是她在外面有人了 917 00:53:33,500 --> 00:53:36,250 ‪已经好了几个月了 918 00:53:37,875 --> 00:53:40,333 ‪随意…对 919 00:53:52,625 --> 00:53:53,458 ‪梅勒妮 920 00:53:57,625 --> 00:53:59,875 ‪梅儿 梅儿 你没事吧? 921 00:53:59,958 --> 00:54:01,458 ‪嗯 我的羊水破了 922 00:54:02,333 --> 00:54:04,625 ‪-一切都好 ‪-好吧 不过我们听见了尖叫 923 00:54:04,708 --> 00:54:05,833 ‪对 那是吉迪恩 924 00:54:06,333 --> 00:54:07,875 ‪我们得马上去医院 925 00:54:07,958 --> 00:54:10,541 ‪我已经规划好了路线 ‪车钥匙在哪里? 926 00:54:11,083 --> 00:54:13,208 ‪-你肯定是尼克 ‪-是的 927 00:54:13,291 --> 00:54:15,125 ‪-很高兴见到你 ‪-苏珊整天都在谈论你 928 00:54:15,208 --> 00:54:16,958 ‪-不 我没有 ‪-是的 实际上你有 929 00:54:17,041 --> 00:54:19,541 ‪-她当然有 我是她最喜欢的客户 ‪-不 那是杰罗姆 930 00:54:19,625 --> 00:54:20,458 ‪杰罗姆? 931 00:54:20,666 --> 00:54:22,708 ‪我的魅力比杰罗姆高十倍 932 00:54:22,791 --> 00:54:25,541 ‪他就是个脾气暴躁的可爱小老头 933 00:54:26,000 --> 00:54:29,208 ‪没错 对 他身上的确有那些老的东西 934 00:54:29,875 --> 00:54:33,041 ‪我就喜欢这种你来我往的戏谑 935 00:54:33,125 --> 00:54:36,041 ‪-但我要去生小孩了 ‪-对 好 好的 936 00:54:36,125 --> 00:54:39,083 ‪吉迪恩 我想在车里生 937 00:54:39,166 --> 00:54:40,166 ‪车是租来的 938 00:54:41,375 --> 00:54:43,916 ‪-我找不到车钥匙了 ‪-看看你的左手 939 00:54:45,333 --> 00:54:46,583 ‪-对 ‪-好 940 00:54:46,666 --> 00:54:48,916 ‪你觉得生孩子的事我们没经历过吗? 941 00:54:49,000 --> 00:54:50,583 ‪-你能行 ‪-好的 宝贝 942 00:54:50,875 --> 00:54:52,791 ‪记得我们的约定吗? ‪你好好陪着苏珊阿姨 943 00:54:52,875 --> 00:54:54,500 ‪-好的 ‪-好 944 00:54:54,583 --> 00:54:57,041 ‪我的宫缩频率到五分钟一次了 ‪如果我们不马上出发 945 00:54:57,125 --> 00:54:59,791 ‪我们就要以她出生时的 ‪高速路给她取名了 946 00:54:59,875 --> 00:55:01,791 ‪-好的 I90是个糟糕的名字 ‪-再见 947 00:55:01,916 --> 00:55:03,250 ‪-我们走 ‪-爱你 948 00:55:03,333 --> 00:55:06,375 ‪哦 我们还不认识 ‪嗨 我叫吉迪恩 很高兴… 949 00:55:06,458 --> 00:55:07,291 ‪-尼克 ‪-哦 抱歉 950 00:55:07,375 --> 00:55:08,958 ‪-快走 ‪-好的 再见 951 00:55:09,041 --> 00:55:09,916 ‪-再见 ‪-再见 各位 952 00:55:10,000 --> 00:55:11,541 ‪-好好的 ‪-记得拍照 953 00:55:11,875 --> 00:55:13,083 ‪或者…不要了 954 00:55:14,375 --> 00:55:16,583 ‪-真让人兴奋 ‪-那个…是啊 955 00:55:16,916 --> 00:55:19,708 ‪我就是一直觉得登陆日最终来时 ‪我应该在上班 956 00:55:20,333 --> 00:55:22,416 ‪你知道我留下来帮忙 957 00:55:23,041 --> 00:55:25,250 ‪不用 你根本不知道 ‪自己惹上了什么麻烦 958 00:55:26,916 --> 00:55:27,958 ‪-他吗? ‪-嗯 959 00:55:28,250 --> 00:55:29,125 ‪简单 960 00:55:41,500 --> 00:55:42,958 ‪好啊 961 00:55:49,041 --> 00:55:50,000 ‪怎么回事? 962 00:55:50,083 --> 00:55:51,541 ‪好啊 963 00:55:52,458 --> 00:55:55,375 ‪他刚才还像是冯·特拉普家的孩子 ‪现在完全变成饥饿游戏了 964 00:55:59,125 --> 00:55:59,958 ‪我吓到了 965 00:56:07,125 --> 00:56:08,625 ‪-奥利弗 ‪-干吗? 966 00:56:09,166 --> 00:56:12,708 ‪奥利弗 我们需要聊聊睡觉的事情 967 00:56:13,375 --> 00:56:15,041 ‪你在用律师的口气 ‪和四岁小朋友说话? 968 00:56:15,125 --> 00:56:16,791 ‪我愿意做出让步 969 00:56:17,500 --> 00:56:18,958 ‪好的 我马上回来 970 00:56:19,041 --> 00:56:19,916 ‪好的 971 00:56:20,958 --> 00:56:23,583 ‪你想要干吗? ‪你就说你想要干吗? 972 00:56:24,125 --> 00:56:25,666 ‪好的 谁想要冰淇淋 973 00:56:25,750 --> 00:56:27,500 ‪-我 ‪-好的 974 00:56:27,583 --> 00:56:31,083 ‪冰淇淋来了 ‪但首先躺到床上去 975 00:56:31,583 --> 00:56:32,416 ‪快点 976 00:56:33,875 --> 00:56:34,708 ‪给你 977 00:56:36,500 --> 00:56:37,333 ‪享用吧 978 00:56:38,250 --> 00:56:39,208 ‪搞定 979 00:56:39,291 --> 00:56:40,958 ‪一直以来你都用这招? 980 00:56:41,041 --> 00:56:42,916 ‪对 这是贿赂 ‪历史上最古老的招数 981 00:56:44,166 --> 00:56:45,375 ‪-晚安 孩子 ‪-晚安 982 00:56:52,250 --> 00:56:55,458 ‪哦 天哪 下次 我要带圣水来 983 00:57:02,125 --> 00:57:03,000 ‪是吉迪恩 984 00:57:05,125 --> 00:57:06,833 ‪“艾米莉亚宝宝在此 985 00:57:06,916 --> 00:57:09,541 ‪六斤四两 母女平安 986 00:57:09,625 --> 00:57:12,083 ‪-爸爸需要喝酒” ‪-哇 987 00:57:12,166 --> 00:57:13,791 ‪看看啊 988 00:57:14,041 --> 00:57:15,583 ‪太不可思议了 是吗? 989 00:57:16,666 --> 00:57:19,041 ‪你的生活瞬间会发生多大的改变? 990 00:57:19,833 --> 00:57:20,666 ‪嗯 991 00:57:27,958 --> 00:57:28,791 ‪我最好走了 992 00:57:29,708 --> 00:57:32,416 ‪嗯 我明早很早 ‪有个物理康复治疗要做 993 00:57:32,875 --> 00:57:33,708 ‪所以… 994 00:57:35,333 --> 00:57:36,583 ‪特别的地方 是吗? 995 00:57:37,083 --> 00:57:38,125 ‪哦 是的 996 00:57:38,916 --> 00:57:41,500 ‪一旦我们赢了官司 就会更好了 997 00:57:41,916 --> 00:57:42,750 ‪为何会那样? 998 00:57:43,416 --> 00:57:46,000 ‪我把诉讼收益都捐给了… 999 00:57:46,500 --> 00:57:47,541 ‪新的儿童部门 1000 00:57:48,166 --> 00:57:50,000 ‪那里的儿童数量会让你惊讶 1001 00:57:51,166 --> 00:57:52,625 ‪你从来没告诉过我 1002 00:57:53,333 --> 00:57:54,208 ‪你从来没问 1003 00:57:58,708 --> 00:57:59,916 ‪抱歉我对你妄加评判 1004 00:58:00,750 --> 00:58:02,750 ‪不用 我也对你做过同样的事 1005 00:58:03,416 --> 00:58:04,416 ‪南瓜拿铁? 1006 00:58:11,708 --> 00:58:13,083 ‪今晚我过得很愉快 1007 00:58:13,500 --> 00:58:14,333 ‪我也是 1008 00:58:21,791 --> 00:58:23,333 ‪嘿 给我一个拥抱 1009 00:58:24,458 --> 00:58:25,916 ‪-我们可以拥抱 ‪-对吗? 1010 00:58:27,083 --> 00:58:28,291 ‪-对 ‪-嗯 1011 00:58:32,666 --> 00:58:34,208 ‪你的气味不像律师 1012 00:58:54,750 --> 00:58:55,666 ‪晚安 苏珊 1013 00:58:57,291 --> 00:58:58,125 ‪晚安 1014 00:59:08,125 --> 00:59:10,333 ‪她在执行任务时失踪了 ‪她从来没有这样过 1015 00:59:10,666 --> 00:59:12,791 ‪首先她昨天请了假陪宝宝 1016 00:59:12,875 --> 00:59:15,375 ‪那宝宝根本不是客户 ‪今天她还迟到? 1017 00:59:15,458 --> 00:59:17,125 ‪我们要发安珀警报吗? 1018 00:59:17,791 --> 00:59:19,791 ‪我想中午前在公交车上看到她的名字 1019 00:59:29,750 --> 00:59:31,916 ‪-她喘不上气吗? ‪-我觉得那是傻笑 1020 00:59:32,250 --> 00:59:34,250 ‪她听起来就像是 ‪吃下第二颗安眠药的我 1021 00:59:36,125 --> 00:59:38,541 ‪-嘿 苏珊 ‪-从高处倒 1022 00:59:39,333 --> 00:59:40,458 ‪你感觉如何? 1023 00:59:43,541 --> 00:59:45,208 ‪你知道吗?好的不能再好了 1024 00:59:45,875 --> 00:59:47,000 ‪不 这杯是新鲜的 1025 00:59:48,750 --> 00:59:49,875 ‪你真好 1026 00:59:53,625 --> 00:59:55,375 ‪回去工作吧 1027 00:59:59,958 --> 01:00:02,291 ‪-我没闻出她白天喝酒了 ‪-伏特加闻不出来 1028 01:00:03,125 --> 01:00:04,958 ‪-你的我就能闻出 ‪-闭嘴 1029 01:00:07,125 --> 01:00:08,541 ‪惠特克联合律师事务所 1030 01:00:09,708 --> 01:00:10,666 ‪请稍等 1031 01:00:12,958 --> 01:00:13,791 ‪是比尔·琼斯 1032 01:00:18,333 --> 01:00:20,083 ‪-哦 嘿 你 ‪-好 1033 01:00:20,541 --> 01:00:23,083 ‪怎么回事?你不介意我没有敲门了 1034 01:00:23,875 --> 01:00:26,041 ‪我很感激你的热情工作 1035 01:00:26,416 --> 01:00:28,916 ‪我对你很感激 罗伯托 1036 01:00:30,958 --> 01:00:31,958 ‪好 1037 01:00:34,083 --> 01:00:35,833 ‪-比尔·琼斯在一号线 ‪-好 1038 01:00:39,541 --> 01:00:41,666 ‪-琼斯先生 ‪-惠特克小姐 1039 01:00:41,750 --> 01:00:45,291 ‪我必须通知你我们最后时刻 ‪决定要传唤一名证人 1040 01:00:46,458 --> 01:00:47,875 ‪阿丽安娜·西尔弗 1041 01:00:50,041 --> 01:00:51,125 ‪你们怎么找到她的? 1042 01:00:51,208 --> 01:00:53,958 ‪挖黑料的不止你一个 惠特克小姐 1043 01:00:54,375 --> 01:00:56,375 ‪我们一直在当勤劳的小蜜蜂 1044 01:00:57,583 --> 01:01:00,458 ‪忙着调查尼克·埃文斯的恋爱史 1045 01:01:02,250 --> 01:01:06,416 ‪看起来你和客户相处地越来越好了 1046 01:01:06,875 --> 01:01:10,416 ‪幸运的事 我的个人生活 ‪和这件官司无关 1047 01:01:11,458 --> 01:01:13,458 ‪这一点我现在无法确定了 1048 01:01:13,958 --> 01:01:14,833 ‪你看 1049 01:01:15,958 --> 01:01:18,250 ‪恋爱保证实际上声称 1050 01:01:18,333 --> 01:01:22,041 ‪注册用户将通过恋爱保证找到真爱 1051 01:01:22,583 --> 01:01:26,000 ‪它并没有规定必须在网站上安排约会 1052 01:01:26,750 --> 01:01:29,791 ‪只是说因为网站注册用户能找到真爱 1053 01:01:32,916 --> 01:01:33,916 ‪你还在吗? 1054 01:01:36,833 --> 01:01:38,291 ‪-在 ‪-我想也是 1055 01:01:39,958 --> 01:01:42,375 ‪这是你接受和解的最后机会 1056 01:01:42,750 --> 01:01:45,750 ‪否则的话会输得很难看 1057 01:01:45,833 --> 01:01:47,916 ‪对你和你的客户来说… 1058 01:01:49,416 --> 01:01:51,250 ‪西雅图律师女士 1059 01:01:53,750 --> 01:01:54,625 ‪再见 1060 01:02:20,958 --> 01:02:22,583 ‪(尼克·埃文斯) 1061 01:02:46,500 --> 01:02:48,875 ‪嗨 你接通了苏珊的电话 请留言 1062 01:02:49,208 --> 01:02:50,958 ‪嘿 我是尼克 你今晚有空吗? 1063 01:02:51,166 --> 01:02:53,791 ‪我刚搞到了《亡命天涯》的DVD 1064 01:02:55,250 --> 01:02:58,250 ‪我太兴奋了 我都忘了 ‪我家已经没有DVD播放器五年了 1065 01:02:58,333 --> 01:02:59,666 ‪你有DVD播放器吗? 1066 01:03:00,208 --> 01:03:01,041 ‪有人有吗? 1067 01:03:02,375 --> 01:03:03,458 ‪好吧 回我电话 1068 01:03:17,666 --> 01:03:20,208 ‪-你必须和他谈 ‪-告诉他什么? 1069 01:03:21,208 --> 01:03:24,791 ‪因为我注册了那个可笑的网站 ‪我们的官司可能输掉? 1070 01:03:26,916 --> 01:03:29,333 ‪如果尼克找到了真爱 ‪这只是个小问题 1071 01:03:29,666 --> 01:03:30,500 ‪对吗?所以… 1072 01:03:31,458 --> 01:03:33,500 ‪你们一起工作的时候就踩下刹车 1073 01:03:33,583 --> 01:03:36,041 ‪那就是问题 我不想踩刹车 1074 01:03:36,125 --> 01:03:38,333 ‪我第一次想更进一步 1075 01:03:38,625 --> 01:03:40,250 ‪-那很好啊 ‪-不好 1076 01:03:40,791 --> 01:03:41,708 ‪不 不好 1077 01:03:42,333 --> 01:03:45,208 ‪如果恋爱保证发现尼克… 1078 01:03:46,083 --> 01:03:49,041 ‪喜欢上我 ‪他们会在法庭上用这个攻击我们 1079 01:03:49,750 --> 01:03:51,583 ‪我们会输掉这场官司 1080 01:03:51,666 --> 01:03:54,625 ‪他就无法捐任何钱 ‪给康复中心 然后… 1081 01:04:04,541 --> 01:04:05,833 ‪好的 爱你 妹妹 1082 01:04:07,750 --> 01:04:08,583 ‪喂? 1083 01:04:08,666 --> 01:04:11,208 ‪你去哪里了? ‪我给你留了五通留言 1084 01:04:11,291 --> 01:04:13,000 ‪就是准备上庭的东西 1085 01:04:13,500 --> 01:04:15,416 ‪嗯 你想要帮忙吗? 1086 01:04:15,791 --> 01:04:16,958 ‪不 我能搞定 1087 01:04:17,458 --> 01:04:18,291 ‪好 1088 01:04:19,458 --> 01:04:21,708 ‪点个满满一份 ‪泰式炒金边粉外卖怎么样? 1089 01:04:22,208 --> 01:04:23,625 ‪剩下的可以放入你的收藏中 1090 01:04:23,708 --> 01:04:25,250 ‪我这里很好 谢谢 1091 01:04:26,750 --> 01:04:28,208 ‪你没事吧?你听上去不对劲 1092 01:04:29,000 --> 01:04:29,833 ‪就是很忙 1093 01:04:29,916 --> 01:04:32,250 ‪离上庭只有两周了 1094 01:04:35,000 --> 01:04:35,875 ‪好吧 1095 01:04:38,333 --> 01:04:40,458 ‪等你要出来透气就通知我 1096 01:04:44,833 --> 01:04:47,458 ‪尼克 我觉得现在我们不应该见面 1097 01:04:47,750 --> 01:04:50,958 ‪我需要专注于官司 ‪这是我的当务之急 1098 01:04:54,666 --> 01:04:55,791 ‪这是你想要的吗? 1099 01:04:57,333 --> 01:05:01,083 ‪我们不能总是做我们想做的 ‪有时候我们需要做正确的 1100 01:05:03,625 --> 01:05:04,791 ‪你为什么要这么做? 1101 01:05:06,041 --> 01:05:07,791 ‪你想赢 是不是? 1102 01:05:09,250 --> 01:05:11,708 ‪这就是整个官司的关键 ‪所以你雇用我 是吗? 1103 01:05:11,791 --> 01:05:12,625 ‪是的 1104 01:05:13,750 --> 01:05:16,583 ‪让我做我专长的 ‪对我们都有好处 好吗? 1105 01:05:21,708 --> 01:05:25,083 ‪好 法庭上见 1106 01:05:36,541 --> 01:05:37,541 ‪看起来我淹死了 1107 01:07:06,541 --> 01:07:09,375 ‪一家网站能保证恋爱吗? 1108 01:07:09,750 --> 01:07:11,083 ‪我们马上就能发现 1109 01:07:11,500 --> 01:07:12,916 ‪她来了 泰勒小姐 1110 01:07:13,000 --> 01:07:15,000 ‪祝福你们 1111 01:07:15,375 --> 01:07:17,250 ‪访问我的生活方式博客 1112 01:07:21,833 --> 01:07:22,666 ‪嗨 1113 01:07:23,375 --> 01:07:25,125 ‪是新外套吗?看起来很棒 1114 01:07:26,000 --> 01:07:27,333 ‪我们让好戏开演吧 1115 01:07:27,416 --> 01:07:29,583 ‪惠特克小姐和埃文斯先生 请稍等 1116 01:07:29,666 --> 01:07:32,083 ‪埃文斯先生 你进行了多少次约会? 1117 01:07:33,083 --> 01:07:35,291 ‪-你有什么想说的吗? ‪-有声明吗 埃文斯先生? 1118 01:07:35,625 --> 01:07:36,958 ‪为了找到真爱 1119 01:07:37,041 --> 01:07:39,333 ‪你们愿意付出什么代价? 1120 01:07:46,041 --> 01:07:47,875 ‪几乎一切 对吗? 1121 01:07:48,958 --> 01:07:49,791 ‪那么… 1122 01:07:51,000 --> 01:07:55,458 ‪每月支付29,95美元 ‪包括使用网站和应用 1123 01:07:55,708 --> 01:08:01,125 ‪恋爱保证保证你会找到真爱 1124 01:08:01,916 --> 01:08:04,125 ‪你要做的就是进行1000次约会 1125 01:08:06,000 --> 01:08:09,541 ‪没错 跟1000个人约会 1126 01:08:10,791 --> 01:08:14,708 ‪我参加了两次半恋爱保证的约会 1127 01:08:14,791 --> 01:08:17,708 ‪对我来说足够了 谢谢 1128 01:08:19,541 --> 01:08:22,250 ‪我的客户 尼古拉斯·埃文斯 1129 01:08:23,083 --> 01:08:24,208 ‪遵循了这条规则 1130 01:08:24,291 --> 01:08:27,500 ‪他完成了1000次约会 但是… 1131 01:08:28,291 --> 01:08:32,750 ‪恋爱保证没有实现他们的承诺 1132 01:08:35,791 --> 01:08:37,625 ‪尼克·埃文斯没有找到真爱 1133 01:08:41,208 --> 01:08:43,916 ‪在审判过程中 证据将会证明 1134 01:08:44,250 --> 01:08:48,791 ‪恋爱保证更关心的是自己的利润 ‪而不是他们会员的 1135 01:08:48,875 --> 01:08:50,041 ‪幸福 1136 01:08:51,083 --> 01:08:51,958 ‪尼古拉斯·埃文斯 1137 01:08:52,041 --> 01:08:55,666 ‪要求恋爱保证 1138 01:08:56,208 --> 01:08:57,583 ‪为你们的错误行为负责 1139 01:08:58,666 --> 01:08:59,500 ‪谢谢 1140 01:09:01,291 --> 01:09:03,500 ‪琼斯先生 轮到你了 1141 01:09:03,583 --> 01:09:04,708 ‪谢谢 法官大人 1142 01:09:07,708 --> 01:09:11,416 ‪我们作为被告 ‪支持恋爱保证的品牌信息 1143 01:09:12,208 --> 01:09:15,833 ‪真正寻找的人保证能得到爱 1144 01:09:16,833 --> 01:09:19,750 ‪在这个审判期间 被告将会证明 1145 01:09:20,166 --> 01:09:23,375 ‪尼克·埃文斯根本不想寻找真爱 1146 01:09:24,833 --> 01:09:29,708 ‪这起诉讼与贸易惯例或虚假广告无关 1147 01:09:30,625 --> 01:09:33,291 ‪这是一次低劣的“逮到你了”诉讼 1148 01:09:33,625 --> 01:09:35,458 ‪就是为了钱 1149 01:09:36,125 --> 01:09:38,583 ‪现在证据将显示尼克·埃文斯 1150 01:09:38,916 --> 01:09:41,375 ‪曾经被爱灼伤 1151 01:09:42,000 --> 01:09:44,083 ‪再也不想寻找真爱 1152 01:09:44,583 --> 01:09:48,541 ‪没错 埃文斯先生 ‪也许完成了1000次约会 1153 01:09:49,083 --> 01:09:54,125 ‪但证据将表明 ‪他只是为了拿钱而完成任务 1154 01:09:55,083 --> 01:09:57,375 ‪所以在审判结束时 1155 01:09:58,166 --> 01:10:01,583 ‪陪审团里的好人会发现 ‪爱是有保证的 1156 01:10:02,625 --> 01:10:03,916 ‪并驳回所有指控 1157 01:10:05,416 --> 01:10:06,250 ‪谢谢 1158 01:10:08,583 --> 01:10:09,458 ‪谢谢 1159 01:10:10,833 --> 01:10:14,125 ‪罗斯莫尔博士 为了记录在案 ‪你的专业领域是什么? 1160 01:10:15,083 --> 01:10:17,083 ‪我拥有心理学博士学位 1161 01:10:17,166 --> 01:10:21,000 ‪我在大学里教授人类行为和科学 1162 01:10:21,750 --> 01:10:24,458 ‪我的专业是依恋和关系 1163 01:10:25,000 --> 01:10:27,458 ‪主要是爱的科学 1164 01:10:28,416 --> 01:10:30,583 ‪按照你的专业观点 1165 01:10:31,000 --> 01:10:35,083 ‪有什么已知的方法来保证爱情吗? 1166 01:10:35,166 --> 01:10:37,708 ‪所有结论都同意没有方法 1167 01:10:37,791 --> 01:10:40,166 ‪来预测爱情 更别说保证了 1168 01:10:41,958 --> 01:10:43,083 ‪没有问题了 1169 01:10:43,500 --> 01:10:44,666 ‪你为什么不反对? 1170 01:10:45,000 --> 01:10:48,166 ‪那位博士是专家证人 ‪没什么可以反对的 1171 01:10:49,666 --> 01:10:52,125 ‪-你为什么老是打我? ‪-因为你喜欢 1172 01:10:55,541 --> 01:10:56,375 ‪不 我不喜欢 1173 01:10:56,958 --> 01:10:58,666 ‪约会的情况怎么样? 1174 01:10:59,125 --> 01:11:00,750 ‪尼科一直在问我的情况 1175 01:11:01,208 --> 01:11:03,916 ‪网上约会这是第一次 1176 01:11:04,000 --> 01:11:05,041 ‪对吗 女士们? 1177 01:11:08,875 --> 01:11:13,833 ‪你有没有觉得尼克只是装模作样? 1178 01:11:22,333 --> 01:11:24,041 ‪-没有 他人真的很好 ‪-谢谢 1179 01:11:24,125 --> 01:11:26,000 ‪-好啊 ‪-宝贝女儿 1180 01:11:26,458 --> 01:11:28,166 ‪你怎么离开的? 1181 01:11:28,833 --> 01:11:31,583 ‪尼克坚持他来付钱 ‪并护送我到车旁边 1182 01:11:31,666 --> 01:11:33,125 ‪和我握手 跟我道晚安 1183 01:11:33,208 --> 01:11:34,250 ‪完美的绅士 1184 01:11:35,166 --> 01:11:36,666 ‪谢谢你今天抽出时间 1185 01:11:37,208 --> 01:11:38,291 ‪有请被告提问 1186 01:11:39,500 --> 01:11:40,333 ‪别这样 1187 01:11:41,333 --> 01:11:45,333 ‪你指望我们相信 ‪出来赚快钱先生 1188 01:11:45,750 --> 01:11:47,916 ‪没有故意放弃约会? 1189 01:11:48,000 --> 01:11:49,916 ‪没有 正如我说的 完美的绅士 1190 01:11:50,416 --> 01:11:53,250 ‪那你为什么没有再出去? 1191 01:11:53,916 --> 01:11:57,250 ‪这是互联网与会 点击移动 ‪这就是它的运作方式 1192 01:11:57,333 --> 01:12:02,666 ‪不 问题是尼克·埃文斯 ‪无意寻找真爱 1193 01:12:02,750 --> 01:12:05,000 ‪-他操纵了… ‪-反对 法官大人 1194 01:12:05,500 --> 01:12:06,458 ‪反对有效 1195 01:12:07,166 --> 01:12:08,458 ‪实际上 我能回答吗? 1196 01:12:09,708 --> 01:12:12,083 ‪尼克和我约会过一次 1197 01:12:12,500 --> 01:12:14,708 ‪不可能知道他内心想什么 1198 01:12:15,250 --> 01:12:18,666 ‪但我希望他有一天能找到真爱 ‪因为他值得拥有 1199 01:12:19,583 --> 01:12:20,458 ‪我们都值得拥有 1200 01:12:28,083 --> 01:12:29,500 ‪没有问题了 1201 01:12:30,500 --> 01:12:32,916 ‪他表现地就像个圣人 ‪你的计划是什么? 1202 01:12:33,000 --> 01:12:34,416 ‪-别担心 ‪-别碰我 1203 01:12:34,500 --> 01:12:35,375 ‪好吧 1204 01:12:35,458 --> 01:12:38,416 ‪明天我们将通过深入研究 ‪他的人际关系 1205 01:12:38,500 --> 01:12:40,708 ‪撕开尼克的性格和动机 1206 01:12:40,958 --> 01:12:43,500 ‪包括现在的和过往的 1207 01:12:48,208 --> 01:12:49,500 ‪看 他们来了 1208 01:12:49,583 --> 01:12:51,375 ‪泰勒小姐 ‪我是《闪亮西雅图》的记者 1209 01:12:51,458 --> 01:12:52,416 ‪你有话要说吗? 1210 01:12:52,500 --> 01:12:53,541 ‪是的 这是愚蠢的诉讼 1211 01:12:53,625 --> 01:12:55,958 ‪我们依然是你们可以注册的 ‪最佳约会网站 1212 01:12:56,041 --> 01:12:58,041 ‪请访问我的生活方式博客 ‪查看今日小点子 1213 01:12:58,125 --> 01:13:00,166 ‪不含麸质 不含乳制品 ‪不含小麦 不含糖 不含… 1214 01:13:00,250 --> 01:13:03,916 ‪狠揍对方 点名 ‪全程看起来很凶 1215 01:13:04,000 --> 01:13:05,041 ‪搞定 1216 01:13:06,333 --> 01:13:07,291 ‪我不知道 1217 01:13:07,708 --> 01:13:10,291 ‪我就是不能让比尔·琼斯 ‪毁了尼克的名声 1218 01:13:12,458 --> 01:13:13,291 ‪等等 1219 01:13:14,708 --> 01:13:16,458 ‪-等等? ‪-等什么? 1220 01:13:21,000 --> 01:13:21,833 ‪尼克 1221 01:13:22,750 --> 01:13:23,583 ‪嗨 1222 01:13:24,750 --> 01:13:25,791 ‪听着 我… 1223 01:13:26,666 --> 01:13:29,541 ‪我有个主意 有点另类 但是… 1224 01:13:30,625 --> 01:13:33,125 ‪明天我想传唤阿丽安娜 1225 01:13:33,791 --> 01:13:34,625 ‪为什么? 1226 01:13:35,250 --> 01:13:36,958 ‪反正她都会被传唤 1227 01:13:37,416 --> 01:13:40,916 ‪我们最好掌控她的证词 ‪而不是被动应对 1228 01:13:44,000 --> 01:13:46,458 ‪所以我们可以打击恋爱保证的信心 1229 01:13:47,416 --> 01:13:50,791 ‪我没办法知道阿丽安娜会说什么 1230 01:13:50,875 --> 01:13:54,208 ‪但这能向法庭证明你会就此罢休 1231 01:13:56,958 --> 01:13:59,958 ‪你是个值得尊敬的人 ‪尼克 你会撑过去的 1232 01:14:00,791 --> 01:14:01,625 ‪谢谢 1233 01:14:06,291 --> 01:14:07,208 ‪苏珊… 1234 01:14:11,375 --> 01:14:12,500 ‪明天见 1235 01:14:51,416 --> 01:14:54,666 ‪我讨厌你 蒂芙尼 1236 01:15:04,125 --> 01:15:06,750 ‪在传唤尼古拉斯·埃文斯作证前 1237 01:15:08,166 --> 01:15:11,000 ‪原告想先传唤阿丽安娜·西尔弗小姐 1238 01:15:11,208 --> 01:15:14,208 ‪-反对 那是我的证人 ‪-好的 律师 1239 01:15:14,750 --> 01:15:16,083 ‪请到前面来 1240 01:15:17,875 --> 01:15:20,666 ‪你不能这么做 阿丽安娜·西尔弗 ‪是被告方的证人 1241 01:15:20,750 --> 01:15:23,250 ‪你会有足够的时间进行交叉询问 1242 01:15:23,333 --> 01:15:25,250 ‪她向偷走我的证人 1243 01:15:25,333 --> 01:15:26,291 ‪好的 听好了 1244 01:15:27,083 --> 01:15:32,083 ‪如果惠特克小姐觉得 ‪被告方的证人能对她的官司有帮助 1245 01:15:32,583 --> 01:15:35,125 ‪那么她有权传唤任何人 1246 01:15:35,583 --> 01:15:38,083 ‪正如她指出的 琼斯先生 1247 01:15:38,416 --> 01:15:40,791 ‪交叉询问中你有机会提问 1248 01:15:41,500 --> 01:15:43,833 ‪所以可以 我允许她传唤 1249 01:15:45,166 --> 01:15:46,000 ‪你们回去继续吧 1250 01:15:47,166 --> 01:15:48,250 ‪这不公平 1251 01:15:50,166 --> 01:15:51,625 ‪谢谢 法官大人 1252 01:15:52,375 --> 01:15:55,375 ‪原告传唤阿丽安娜·西尔弗上庭 1253 01:16:17,708 --> 01:16:20,208 ‪你发誓提供的证据属实 ‪并且完全真实 唯有真实? 1254 01:16:20,291 --> 01:16:21,125 ‪我发誓 1255 01:16:28,333 --> 01:16:32,375 ‪西尔弗小姐 ‪你是怎么认识埃文斯先生的? 1256 01:16:33,541 --> 01:16:34,708 ‪他是我的前未婚夫 1257 01:16:37,333 --> 01:16:40,875 ‪下面这个问题大家都想问 1258 01:16:41,333 --> 01:16:42,166 ‪出了什么事? 1259 01:16:43,041 --> 01:16:43,875 ‪我离开了他 1260 01:16:44,750 --> 01:16:45,625 ‪为了另外一个人 1261 01:16:46,958 --> 01:16:49,250 ‪我下个月要结婚了 1262 01:16:50,041 --> 01:16:50,958 ‪恭喜你 1263 01:16:51,708 --> 01:16:53,916 ‪坦率地说 西尔弗小姐 1264 01:16:54,500 --> 01:16:58,291 ‪我假设是辩方把你列为证人是希望 1265 01:16:58,375 --> 01:17:03,208 ‪你能提供证据 ‪显示埃文斯先生个性中不好的一面 1266 01:17:04,458 --> 01:17:06,083 ‪我跟琼斯先生谈的时候 1267 01:17:06,458 --> 01:17:10,208 ‪关于出庭作证 我的确提到我觉得 1268 01:17:11,458 --> 01:17:13,208 ‪尼克是在舔舐自己的伤口 1269 01:17:13,750 --> 01:17:16,958 ‪我是说 1000次约会 ‪你找不到新的对象? 1270 01:17:18,291 --> 01:17:19,416 ‪我觉得有点可疑 1271 01:17:22,000 --> 01:17:25,833 ‪你还是有同样的感受吗? 1272 01:17:33,000 --> 01:17:34,250 ‪实际上没有了 1273 01:17:37,708 --> 01:17:38,750 ‪尼克是个很棒的人 1274 01:17:39,666 --> 01:17:41,166 ‪他很诚实 1275 01:17:41,916 --> 01:17:45,083 ‪所以我认为 ‪这次诉讼建立在诚实真诚上 1276 01:17:48,625 --> 01:17:49,791 ‪我只希望他一切安好 1277 01:17:50,458 --> 01:17:52,291 ‪谢谢你抽出时间前来 西尔弗小姐 1278 01:17:53,375 --> 01:17:54,375 ‪被告方询问证人 1279 01:17:56,666 --> 01:17:57,500 ‪没有问题 1280 01:17:58,083 --> 01:17:59,833 ‪如果没有问题 1281 01:17:59,916 --> 01:18:01,875 ‪证人可以退下了 1282 01:18:02,416 --> 01:18:04,416 ‪原告出庭作证前 1283 01:18:04,500 --> 01:18:07,291 ‪我们休庭15分钟 1284 01:18:11,500 --> 01:18:12,583 ‪阿丽安娜 1285 01:18:16,333 --> 01:18:19,583 ‪我只是想谢谢你 1286 01:18:21,416 --> 01:18:23,166 ‪抱歉我们两个的事是这样的结局 1287 01:18:24,875 --> 01:18:25,750 ‪是我的错 1288 01:18:27,166 --> 01:18:28,166 ‪我没有因此自豪 1289 01:18:29,458 --> 01:18:30,666 ‪但我的确吸取了教训 1290 01:18:31,583 --> 01:18:33,208 ‪我现在找对人了 1291 01:18:33,750 --> 01:18:34,666 ‪我为你开心 1292 01:18:37,083 --> 01:18:38,250 ‪我也为你开心 1293 01:18:39,958 --> 01:18:42,000 ‪-你在说什么? ‪-我知道那种眼神 1294 01:18:42,583 --> 01:18:44,083 ‪你爱上了你的律师 1295 01:18:46,750 --> 01:18:50,041 ‪我就是希望在一切都太迟以前 ‪你要对自己承认这一点 1296 01:18:54,458 --> 01:18:56,208 ‪但如果她不爱我呢? 1297 01:18:58,708 --> 01:18:59,958 ‪如果我再次受伤呢? 1298 01:19:01,291 --> 01:19:03,250 ‪恋爱中没有保障 尼克 1299 01:19:04,125 --> 01:19:05,875 ‪不就是这样的吗? 1300 01:19:10,750 --> 01:19:13,666 ‪你发誓提供的证据属实 ‪并且完全真实 唯有真实? 1301 01:19:14,083 --> 01:19:14,916 ‪我发誓 1302 01:19:24,041 --> 01:19:24,958 ‪埃文斯先生 1303 01:19:25,291 --> 01:19:28,000 ‪请用你自己的语言 1304 01:19:28,791 --> 01:19:33,750 ‪告诉法庭恋爱保证是如何用虚假承诺 1305 01:19:34,541 --> 01:19:36,583 ‪欺骗和伤害你的 1306 01:19:47,625 --> 01:19:49,833 ‪想到什么就说什么 1307 01:20:00,916 --> 01:20:03,291 ‪当我开始这整件事的时候 1308 01:20:05,166 --> 01:20:06,541 ‪我出来是为了正义 1309 01:20:08,583 --> 01:20:11,833 ‪爱情不是你能保证的东西 1310 01:20:13,083 --> 01:20:14,333 ‪好像披萨外送那样 1311 01:20:15,166 --> 01:20:16,416 ‪抱歉 你在干什么? 1312 01:20:17,291 --> 01:20:18,458 ‪爱情是不可预测的 1313 01:20:20,083 --> 01:20:21,083 ‪它能伤害你 1314 01:20:24,000 --> 01:20:25,625 ‪但也能让你获得惊喜 1315 01:20:26,458 --> 01:20:27,958 ‪用最显著的方式 1316 01:20:31,375 --> 01:20:32,833 ‪结果我真的找到了爱情 1317 01:20:35,583 --> 01:20:37,041 ‪我爱上了我的律师 1318 01:20:42,625 --> 01:20:45,791 ‪惠特克小姐自己说过 ‪她注册了恋爱保证 1319 01:20:46,500 --> 01:20:48,375 ‪如果尼克·埃文斯爱上了她 1320 01:20:48,458 --> 01:20:50,125 ‪这项诉讼可以撤销了 1321 01:20:50,541 --> 01:20:53,166 ‪各位 法庭内保持秩序 1322 01:20:54,375 --> 01:20:56,958 ‪不需要撤销 法官大人 1323 01:20:58,291 --> 01:20:59,541 ‪我不起诉了 1324 01:21:03,291 --> 01:21:04,416 ‪琼斯先生说得对 1325 01:21:05,333 --> 01:21:09,916 ‪我没有通过这个网站认识苏珊 ‪但我因为这个网站认识了她 1326 01:21:11,500 --> 01:21:14,166 ‪我承诺过要说真话 1327 01:21:17,875 --> 01:21:22,500 ‪比起今天在法庭上赢 ‪我更愿意在生活中有爱 1328 01:21:24,541 --> 01:21:28,125 ‪找到一个懂你 你也懂她的人 1329 01:21:29,166 --> 01:21:30,583 ‪是一件很美妙的事 1330 01:21:32,916 --> 01:21:34,583 ‪哪怕她们是对的 你是错的 1331 01:21:36,458 --> 01:21:39,375 ‪结果俗话说“你应该再想想” 1332 01:21:40,125 --> 01:21:42,541 ‪真的是这样 我上网查了 奇怪 1333 01:21:46,333 --> 01:21:48,791 ‪一位有智慧的老人 ‪曾经告诉我要深潜下去 所以… 1334 01:21:51,541 --> 01:21:52,375 ‪就这么做 1335 01:21:55,291 --> 01:21:57,291 ‪我意识到 1336 01:21:58,583 --> 01:22:00,958 ‪我不想要保证 1337 01:22:02,000 --> 01:22:03,208 ‪或者是安全网 1338 01:22:05,208 --> 01:22:06,208 ‪我想要的 1339 01:22:09,125 --> 01:22:10,583 ‪是有机会和你在一起 1340 01:22:12,958 --> 01:22:14,125 ‪爱上某人不是风险 1341 01:22:17,500 --> 01:22:18,375 ‪不爱才是风险 1342 01:22:28,083 --> 01:22:29,166 ‪我爱你 苏珊 1343 01:22:30,833 --> 01:22:31,833 ‪你也爱我吗? 1344 01:22:35,250 --> 01:22:37,541 ‪惠特克小姐 回答问题 1345 01:22:40,500 --> 01:22:41,416 ‪我爱 1346 01:22:58,250 --> 01:23:00,541 ‪我把一切功劳都归功于你 真的 1347 01:23:02,875 --> 01:23:04,583 ‪-我为你感到非常自豪 ‪-我的兄弟 1348 01:23:04,666 --> 01:23:06,416 ‪-你一身酒气 ‪-有点 1349 01:23:09,666 --> 01:23:11,291 ‪-惠特克小姐? ‪-是我 1350 01:23:11,375 --> 01:23:12,958 ‪泰勒小姐想和你谈谈 1351 01:23:13,041 --> 01:23:13,875 ‪拜托 1352 01:23:23,875 --> 01:23:25,875 ‪我在西藏跟喇嘛学习的时候 他说 1353 01:23:25,958 --> 01:23:30,125 ‪“过去的几千个辉煌成就 ‪无法再为今天的目的服务” 1354 01:23:31,875 --> 01:23:33,166 ‪抱歉 我没听懂 1355 01:23:33,250 --> 01:23:36,416 ‪我会支付你的法律费用 ‪我还会捐25万到你的医院 1356 01:23:37,583 --> 01:23:40,375 ‪只要你们两个成为 ‪恋爱保证网站的新面孔 1357 01:23:42,708 --> 01:23:43,833 ‪你为什么要这么做? 1358 01:23:43,916 --> 01:23:45,125 ‪一个老套的爱情故事 1359 01:23:45,208 --> 01:23:47,708 ‪完成了一个浪漫的法庭认罪? 1360 01:23:48,041 --> 01:23:49,166 ‪人们喜欢这样的东西 1361 01:23:49,666 --> 01:23:50,500 ‪我是说… 1362 01:23:50,583 --> 01:23:53,541 ‪这能让我在社交媒体上形象良好 ‪不难 但是… 1363 01:23:53,625 --> 01:23:55,958 ‪这比我们现在看到的 ‪海报上的假情侣好多了 1364 01:23:56,041 --> 01:23:57,083 ‪我就知道 1365 01:23:57,500 --> 01:23:58,750 ‪布拉德和维罗妮卡 1366 01:23:58,875 --> 01:24:01,166 ‪-他看穿了 他就是那么称呼他们的 ‪-我就那样称呼 1367 01:24:02,000 --> 01:24:03,291 ‪对于这家医院来说 1368 01:24:03,375 --> 01:24:07,625 ‪25万是一大笔钱 ‪但我们追求的损失费是100万 1369 01:24:07,708 --> 01:24:10,000 ‪让我们面对吧 ‪我们本来能拥有的 所以… 1370 01:24:10,083 --> 01:24:11,208 ‪但你没有 1371 01:24:11,291 --> 01:24:14,333 ‪-不过我们本来可以的 ‪-50万怎么样? 1372 01:24:19,541 --> 01:24:20,375 ‪成交 1373 01:24:22,208 --> 01:24:23,041 ‪哇 1374 01:24:23,666 --> 01:24:27,875 ‪陪审团还在讨论 ‪约会网站是否能保证爱情 1375 01:24:28,333 --> 01:24:31,541 ‪但恋爱保证有了一个美满结局 1376 01:24:34,625 --> 01:24:37,250 ‪那么现在我们怎么办? ‪进行第一次正式约会? 1377 01:24:38,250 --> 01:24:39,791 ‪除了第一次约会 干什么都行 1378 01:24:45,750 --> 01:24:49,375 {\an8}‪(他没想到的女性) 1379 01:25:12,958 --> 01:25:15,000 {\an8}‪(免责声明:爱是无法保证的) 1380 01:25:15,083 --> 01:25:18,083 {\an8}‪(副作用可能包括 ‪心痛 易怒 压力 紧张) 1381 01:25:18,166 --> 01:25:20,666 {\an8}‪(偎依 睡眠不佳 眩晕 ‪兴高采烈 分享炸薯条) 1382 01:25:20,750 --> 01:25:23,375 {\an8}‪(通货紧缩 体重增加 说孩子气的话 ‪生孩子 突然的情绪变化) 1383 01:25:23,458 --> 01:25:26,458 ‪(在对方亲戚家度假 ‪睡沙发 游戏之夜) 1384 01:25:26,583 --> 01:25:28,583 ‪(温暖的感觉 金融危机 ‪夏威夷 亲吻脖子…) 1385 01:29:58,208 --> 01:30:00,208 ‪字幕翻译:陈向伟