Provided by explosiveskull https://twitter.com/kaboomskull
♪ Set us free - ♪
♪ Set us free ♪
♪ In this dark ♪
♪ I will need ♪
♪ A light our way back home Comin' in from the cold ♪
Can now everyone feel nature through the fingertips?
♪ Set us free ♪
- ♪ Set us free ♪ - We're all family.
We're all energy.
We're all as one.
♪ I will need ♪
♪ A light our way back home ♪
♪ Comin' in from the cold ♪
♪ And we'll be all set free ♪
♪ Let us go ♪
You know that the self-help industry
is a $12 billion business?
Televangelists are actually making hundreds
of millions of dollars from their flock.
Three million Americans are actual cult members.
That's 1% of our population.
What was the purpose of your project?
If we could prevent 100 or 50
or even one person from going down this road,
well, then we've done something good here.
It was a great concept.
Great.
We would create a larger than life character
with a unique self-help program.
And then, you know, just document the process.
You don't feel responsible
for duping people?
Duping?
No, we were helping people.
This was investigative filmmaking.
Look at this, huh?
Look at Angel.
You are all made of the same energy
and I pass it to you and you pass it to the next.
The original idea was we end the documentary
with this big moment where we show the footage,
all the behind the scenes stuff,
let them see behind the curtain.
And then they see that it was all fake and staged.
Why not just make a documentary
about fake self-help gurus?
Documentaries observe from the outside.
By creating this plastic shaman,
we gave people an opportunity to peer behind the curtains
to look inside the proverbial sausage factory.
No.
That's why I'm asking-
Why don't we cut?
Tell slate and then cut.
Tell Slate.
That was quite perfect.
Perfect. Let's roll.
One take three. A only. Mark.
Hello.
Humankind has been infected with a mind virus.
And it's coming from advertising
and social media and all this noise.
So is there a way to stop the noise and clean the mind?
My name is Gordon St. Pierre,
and I am the founder of Reboot Camp.
A spa for the mind and a womb for adults.
Let me take you on a journey and be your guide to healing,
by finding the light of love
and being at peace together.
Does this man hold the answer to everlasting happiness?
Dozens of his followers seem to think so.
Members of his Reboot Camp,
which he insists is not a cult,
swear that he is the new messiah of wellbeing.
To be honest, I feel like a change has come over me.
You know, the mind can play tricks
but this doesn't feel like that.
This feels real.
And shake it out to the left.
And shake it out to the right.
I feel determined
and I feel like I'm on the right path.
Yes.
I did. Thank you.
- Thank you. - Excellent.
Ja.
Ja, I want you to talk to yourself now.
This is you at 14.
What do you want to tell you at 14?
What the fuck are you doing?
You're out here, you're selling drugs.
You're having sex with grown women.
Straighten out.
Straighten up right now before it's too late.
Stop fucking and stop selling drugs.
Can I be a 14-year-old him?
All right.
Oh guys, this is fantastic.
I see that. I like that.
- This is beautiful. - You're good, guru.
- You're good. - I like this.
You're fucking A1, man.
I'm a reflection of yourself, you know?
Somehow, I just never broke character.
It's weird.
Once I got into Gordon, it's like I was him.
When I was 16, my friends and I skipped school
everyday for a week to go to the beach.
When my dad found out, he went crazy, threw me out.
I've been on my own ever since.
And then I met Gordon.
My whole life changed.
He was someone who really led us to this path of freedom.
I call this exercise, rattle and um!
Shake it. This is the rattle.
And then we let it out with a, hum!
Hum!
Shanti. Shanti.
I love Gordon.
He's truly an inspiration to so many people.
He's changed my life.
The general belief is that only weak people
fall for false profits and gurus.
But in reality, almost anyone is susceptible
at the right or wrong moment in their lives.
People who've lost jobs, families, runaways,
they find themselves seeking answers.
I'm not stupid.
I'm very smart.
I have a college education.
I just felt like something was missing.
Gordon, he had all the answers.
Anita, this may be a coffin,
but it is a safe coffin, okay?
The problem starts with the infection in the mind.
It's the virus telling me about the future.
Right. I can't stop. How do you stop it?
- I can't stop it. - All right.
Everything that he said made sense to me.
It still does.
Third time's a charm.
- Okay. One more time. - Okay.
I'm gonna need another class after this class.
You don't know how I can contact him, do you?
I'm curious about the name?
- Gordon St. Pierre? - Yeah.
It had a nice ring to it.
I mean, it was branding really?
We were naming a product.
Aha!
- Matsumoto. - Matsumoto?
Think we'll get in trouble on that one.
What about St. Pierre?
Gordon St. Pierre.
The spiritual guide, the leader.
What do you think?
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Except it's Gordon.
- Ooh - St. Pierre from Quebec.
Seymour used to work in tech.
So a lot of personal information to use.
Plus, his wife's French-Canadian.
Who has been reprogrammed by American culture.
So what does he need?
He needs a new operating system.
Oh, yes, yes, yes. I love it.
He needs to reboot the operating system.
- Reboot? - Reboot.
Mike, are you gettin' this on film?
- That's good. - Because this is stuff.
- Reboot. - Yes.
Hello.
My name is Gordon St. Pierre.
Welcome to the Reboot Camp.
If that's not a guru, I don't know what is.
I'm gonna work on the accent.
- But yeah. - a little bit.
See my family, is.
I want to tell you a story, okay?
It was a time I was playing with my three-year-old nephew
and I realized he was closer to bliss than I was.
In fact, I am contaminating him.
So I go to the outback.
You went to the steakhouse?
Not the steakhouse, John.
The Australia, and I study with the Aborigine
and they teach me how to fix the hardware
by reinstalling the software.
This is the gift they give me
and I bring this gift to you.
Are you ready to receive this gift?
Nay or yay?
Yay!
Are we ready to do whatever it take
no matter how crazy or stupid or bizarre?
Nay or yay?
Yay!
Then let's reboot.
Come on! Let's reboot.
Gordon was a trip.
He had this four-step program or was it five?
I'm really bad with numbers.
Step one was all about getting off. You know?
No.
Like switching everything off.
No, no, no.
I can't do the small spaces.
I can't. I can't.
Lisa, you're okay?
Hello. Hello.
I'm fine. It was very pink in there.
- Eric, how you feel though? - I can't do the small spaces.
Okay, but now you appreciate life, huh?
- You see? - I do feel alive.
- Hey, hey, hey. - Come on.
It's good.
And then step two was all like talking.
Or wait. No, no, no, no.
That was step three.
Step two was group activities.
The second stage of the psychosexual development
is the anal stage.
We have been programmed since children to keep it in,
to be retentive.
We don't show how we feel.
We don't show love.
We are programmed not to show these things
and keep it inside, but where do we go?
There's no room.
It take up the heart, it take up the stomach
and it take up the head, the brain.
So today, we're going to dump the virus
and the malware into the toilet.
Dump into the toilet.
Hey, hey, hey.
No, no, no.
It's a figurative dump.
- Don't... - Of course, not really.
Don't take the dump in the toilet. My God.
I think that one guy took it literally
and actually pooped.
My wife convinced me to go to one of the events.
When I saw the guy in the skirt and sandals,
I knew he was a fraud.
Gordon was very nice.
And what he had to say made a lot of sense.
We are all infected.
Yeah.
Was the Reboot Camp a cult?
The Reboot Camp was not a cult when I was there.
Did you have rules
about what was acceptable,
about lines you wouldn't cross?
Absolutely.
We would not separate people from their families
and we wouldn't take money from anyone.
Several people claim
they gave money to the camp.
Well, I never asked anyone for money.
The whole purpose of this was to show
the mechanics of the con.
That's it.
The term cult gets thrown around a lot in pop culture.
But a cult is not just a close knit group.
Many organizations have cult-like elements.
A sense of belonging, the inclusiveness, certain rules,
but that's any athletic club or military organization.
One of the things that make cults, cults,
is that they have a charismatic leader
who claims to have all the answers.
We have another kind of noise that is louder.
The noise in my head.
What should I be?
Who should I be?
And the big question, what is my...
Purpose?
What is my purpose?
Now, my great ability
may be a gift from God, from Buddha, from the light,
is to take these complex question of life
and simplify them for you.
Yes.
I was in a cult when I was a teen.
Reboot Camp wasn't a cult.
It was freaking Disneyland.
Cults are supposed to be dark and controlling,
but Reboot Camp was nothing like that.
Freestyle means you do whatever you want.
You want to be a chicken, you're a chicken.
You want to fly, you fly.
Whoever you are, take it.
I'm feeling the movements of the earth.
The rhythm.
The rhythm of the earth.
- Go, Anita. - I always wanted to do this.
- Ribbon dancing. - Yes, the ribbon.
With your own stuff right there.
Now, I understand how all of these reality shows work,
because that was one of our big worries.
Like, what's gonna happen with these cameras?
What are people gonna say?
Nobody had an issue.
We jump and we love and we take it in.
Excellent.
So love bombing is basically overwhelming new recruits
with attention, praise and love.
That's the early phase right when they join.
So happy you invited me.
I'm so happy you're here, love and light.
You know, usually I wait to do this with a camper,
but you, I want to try something, okay?
- Yeah, anything. - It's okay?
Uh-huh.
I want to bring in another camper
and have you teach him.
Do you think I'm ready?
You are ready, my love.
Really? Okay.
- Okay? - Okay.
Hello, John.
This is Maisey.
Maisey, this is John.
Hi, John.
Maisey.
Tell John that he is loved.
John, you are loved.
John, tell Maisey that you feel the love.
Maisey, I feel the love.
Excellent.
Now, Maisey, tell John you want to give him the love.
Come on. Tell him.
John, I wanna give you the love.
Yes, give him the love.
Give him the love.
Yes. Give him the love.
It's so good.
Okay. I'm really not comfortable with this.
Oh, take the love, John.
Take it.
- Just feel it, John. - It's good love.
This was good for John.
It loosened him right up.
The guy had an erection.
Stop it.
Not everyone walks around with a boner.
Gordon made everyone feel loved.
Yeah, I felt the love, all right.
We love Jimmy, we love Jimmy, we love Jimmy.
Love.
I don't care who you are.
Two dozen people hugging you, telling you they love you,
showering you with affection over and over.
It is supremely powerful.
My dad was a preacher.
He loved his congregation.
But at home he was cold as ice.
And whenever my mom would show me any sign of affection,
he'd yell at her and tell her that she was making me weak.
Why you treat him like that?
You're gonna make him gay.
I guess the joke's on you, dad.
At Reboot Camp, everyone was just so nice.
Jimmy!
Everyone genuinely cared and Gordon encouraged it.
This is your family.
This is people who love you.
I've never really had a family before.
You have a family now, man, come on.
Come on. You gotta get out.
It's like a drug.
You want more.
And so you stick around because now you've been primed
to receive the gospel.
Because this guy has all the answers.
Because, look at how good you feel.
♪ Why would you look outside yourself ♪
- Thank you so much. - Thank you so much.
♪ All of the world inside ♪
♪ One, two, three, four ♪
Release the feathers.
Take the feathers and thrust the feathers to the gang.
Now, try to catch the feathers, try to catch them.
Can you catch them?
No, you can't, right?
- No. - This is the same thing
with the mind virus, guys.
You cannot stop the infection.
You are infected.
The first time he called us no bots,
I thought I misheard.
But then he kept using the phrase,
and, I don't know, I liked it.
You know, it made me feel special.
'cause we weren't robots.
We were no bots.
I have two friends here I want you to meet.
We have Henry. Hello, Henry.
And the beautiful, Chantal.
Ooh, la, la. Okay.
So the thing about Henry and Chantal
that they're very good at is they can look at each other
and they don't talk.
The virus come from the noise.
The mind viruses, the noise is coming,
it's coming, it's coming.
We're going to take it out.
Bobby, excellent.
We're going on a 24-hour, we're diet everyone.
You know, you have the food diet,
you don't eat.
This is you don't talk.
Shh!
Excellent, my no bots.
You are fantastic.
I have a question.
Shh!
I went up to him, I said, "Look, I'm a talker.
That's just what I do.
And not talking is just not gonna cut it."
He laughed.
He said it was especially important for me.
So he challenged me to do it for 48 hours.
I lasted 40 minutes.
This is good, my no bots.
This is excellent.
Take in the sun.
Don't worry about the blower.
Gordon had all these interesting terms.
Huh?
We make up the word.
Oh, okay.
So it's a new way of communication, okay?
Like that?
John, what is she telling you with that word?
Be quiet.
I felt more at peace with myself.
That was all a lot of fluff for me.
She was finally happy, so I was happy.
when you say finally happy...
Well, there was infidelity.
We don't need to get into that.
Well, I had an affair with the dry cleaner.
She caught the yellow fever.
Stop.
You can't say that.
That is racist.
Sure I can. He was Korean.
You should probably go on another word diet, you know?
Okay? All right.
Our whole belief system was in turning off noise.
And cleaning ourselves of these inner viruses.
And we did this through all kinds of exercises,
mostly outdoor activities like yoga.
Louder, louder.
Moving on into the elephant tusk.
Take a deep breath in, take your tusks out.
Oh, it's a good elephant.
Good elephant, Lilian.
And we're gonna squat down.
We are going to use our root chakra
with a little bit of a pelvic thrust.
Come on, everyone.
Well, you know what he got me into.
He got me back in my driving lust
I have for my wife.
Two cows having sex in the woods.
It's okay.
Okay, she can't hear.
Okay?
That's the only complaint I really have.
It's the fact she's sleeping with my best friend.
Besides that, I'm fine.
I'm not really fine.
- Eric. - Yes.
Breathe with me. Come on.
The first word you want to say to let out is what?
Shit!
- Say it again. - Shit!
- One more time, louder. - Shit!
This thing about reconnect,
I didn't even know we were disconnected.
He made us draw these.
He said our drawings help us identify our viruses.
I told him that crap didn't work for me.
He told us the best was yet to come.
Did he specify what the best was?
He called it the rebooted bliss.
Success, love, money,
a deeper understanding of life,
a sense of purpose.
Every guru has a different promise.
Ours was the bliss.
The bliss is just around the corner.
If you could just wait a little longer,
then the clouds will break open
and the bliss will rain down upon you
and you'll prove all the naysayers wrong
as you lead this life of bliss.
If you could just be a little more patient.
That's what my wife used to tell me.
Just be a little more patient.
That and to visualize my intentions.
What she didn't visualize was the divorce.
Seymour wasn't like the other boys I grew up with.
He was deeper, more intense.
I was instantly attracted to him.
He got a job in Silicon Valley
and I became a housewife straight out of college.
One day, Seymour told me that his company
was paying for a self-improvement seminar
and that spouses were welcome.
So I went out of sheer boredom.
At first, I thought it was gonna be
this new age, hippy mumbo jumbo,
but I actually loved it.
I was just happy she had something to do.
'cause I was working all the time.
Crazy hours, weekends.
It was very action-oriented.
We had assignments and I was hooked.
I think paying for these seminars
lessened the guilt of just not being around.
I was addicted.
I must've taken 100 seminars.
And she never put what she learned into practice. Right?
Because she was almost there, almost ready,
but needed one more class or like this ultimate retreat.
That would be it.
I saw all of them.
The local guys, the Robbins, Chopra.
And I had no idea what these gurus were charging.
Do you know...
Like, okay.
Like a two day seminar could be two or $3,000.
Some of these retreats were in the tens of thousands.
And then one day I came back
from a spiritual retreat in Brazil
and there was a bank statement on the kitchen table.
So Grace blew through all our money,
our retirement fund,
and accumulated over 90 grand in credit card debt.
I had spent over $300,000.
And here we were worse off than when we graduated college.
Seymour shut down completely.
And it wasn't even the money.
I just felt betrayed.
It was 10:00 p.m.
I'm already sleeping
'cause I have an early call time the next morning.
There's a knock on my door.
It's my brother.
Seymour just disappeared.
Gone.
Didn't show up for work.
I waited and waited.
I didn't hear a peep.
A week turns into a month.
And before you knew it, we were roommates.
I didn't know what to do.
So I called my coach.
He was really helpful.
So Danny helped me out.
He got me some extra work on these commercials.
And somehow that segued into me doing voiceover work.
I'm in the recording studio one day
and I bump into this old college buddy.
And he tells me he bumped into Grace,
with a guy.
Apparently, she started seeing her self-help coach.
Seymour is a calm guy.
This, I had never seen him so mad.
She sided with the enemy.
Can I get an amen?
Danny and I booked this gig
doing a promo for this televangelist.
Yes. Can I get an amen?
Thank you, Jesus. Whoa!
The preacher was a perfect con artist.
Suave and sleazy, but condescending.
If planes had existed when Jesus was around,
he would have flown from Bethlehem to Nazareth
and all over Galilee.
People have dreams.
I have a dream and my dream is to touch my flock
as often as possible.
And this here aeroplane helps me do that.
This, this is God's plane.
After the shoot from hell,
Danny and I go out for drinks with the crew.
And voila.
The idea for the Reboot Camp was born.
We change keys to
You know, most people, they try to life.
They wake up one day, oh, I'm in a nightmare.
I don't know what I need.
- I think I'm in a nightmare and I don't know what I need. - A-Ha!
Last week I got fired from my job.
I came home early from work and I find my girlfriend
in the tub with our neighbor, Laryssa.
Oh!
They were drinking margaritas
in the middle of the day for lunch.
I was in such a state I forgot to put my car into park
and it rolled into the garage, crashed into the shelf
and killed my boa constrictor, little Herbie junior.
No.
Yeah.
And I didn't know what to do.
So, I understand you blame the neighbor.
I guess I blame Marissa, my girlfriend.
Both of 'em.
Laryssa, is the girlfriend?
No. Marissa is the girlfriend.
Marissa?
- Yeah. - Is the girlfriend?
Yes.
Of Laryssa?
Well, she said no, but I think maybe she's lying.
We're going to do an exercise outside together.
- Really? - Yeah.
We're going to fix it, okay.
- We are? - Yes, we're going to fix it.
Okay.
People responded to Seymour.
They worshiped him.
It didn't matter what he said or did,
they just lapped it all up.
We're going to put you back in the womb
to the moment you come through the placenta
and you will be in bliss.
- We're wrapping him up. - Okay, Johnny.
Let's put him on the ground.
Let's go, guys.
We're gonna put it down.
Reboot Camp is fucking awesome.
It's pretty amazing actually.
Sometimes, he didn't even say anything.
Gordon,
will you please tell her how the world works?
Look at her.
She's beautiful.
But with the right breasts, she'd be unstoppable.
I'm not getting implants, mom.
I don't need a rich asshole to support me.
Hey, it's your father you're talking about.
I can't get through to her.
Hopefully you can help me.
No, leave him out of it.
No, he's here to help us.
You're worth more than your boobs.
What about butt cheeks?
The guy solved people's problems
without even uttering a word.
My God, mom.
Just get it right.
It drove her crazy that Gordon wasn't interested in her
or her boobs.
If he was such a saint, why did he get you these?
Because he was proving a point.
I mean, I look like Nicki Minaj.
You do not.
You look like Barbie.
I looked ridiculous.
You know, I actually knew from the beginning
that he was a fake.
I knew it.
This whole project is about fakeness and fake people, mom.
It's a pretty powerful message
if you get it.
Can I just add a note here?
I do feel like I got a lot out of this.
What'd you get?
High with Ja Rule?
Yeah, but that's not what I was talking about.
I mean that, I don't think you need to get implants at all.
Are you serious?
Yes.
Thank you, mom.
- I love you. - I love you too.
I think you're perfect the way you are.
And even with your implants, I think you're perfect, too.
Just a little more perfect.
What's funny is our teachings actually worked.
Word got out, people just started showing up.
Now we see that with heart,
I take it and I dip it.
Hello.
This is Keith. I'm Ysabel.
This is my fiancé.
He's got multiple phobias.
No. No, I don't.
I don't.
He has got Eurotophobia.
Fear of vagina.
- Okay. That's fine. - Kayla maybe some privacy,
and I talk to you later, love and light.
Hey, love and light.
What is that?
Why is there a camera?
We are recording so we may see the growth
and then play it back to teach you.
- Great. Fine. - Exactly.
You know, we were supposed to get married last year
and three months before the wedding,
he developed all these phobias.
Okay. Tell me about the phobia.
It's phobiae.
Pardon?
The plural of phobia is not phobias or phobia.
- Not phobias. - It's phobiae.
- Phobiae? - Say it with me.
You're French. Okay.
- Phobiae. - Phobiae, hey.
- Phobiae. - That's it.
- Yeah, okay. - Just get it right.
Some healer.
He's been in a wheelchair for three months.
- He's afraid of walking. - I'm not.
I don't understand why,
and ask him how long it's been since we've had sex.
Okay, how long has it been since-
- Nine months. - Nine months.
- That's how long. - That's okay.
- No. It's not okay. - No. Not okay.
- It's okay. - Nine weeks maybe.
But I'm just saying it's...
Yeah, and that's not okay.
His teachings were eccentric.
Everybody knew that though.
Everybody knew his teachings were eccentric.
I think the important thing to focus on
is the fact that it works.
Come on. One, two, three.
Go, go.
Excellent. Okay.
Are you okay?
Very good.
Keith is already in Shavasana.
It's a good pose.
It's a meditative pose.
We're going to find him in cobra.
Come on with me, Isabel.
Feet together, toes together and up.
Through the light.
Exhale through the heart center.
We wing over, bend down.
Excellent.
Push up.
Now, he's peaceful.
Shh.
Let the peace and love in.
Fuck shit, motherfucker.
Fuck, cocksucker. Fuck!
Oh, that felt good.
That's good.
Try that.
You go.
Motherfucker, cocksucker, shit balls and vagina.
Excellent, Ysabel.
Excellent. Keith, you go.
No.
I'm not doing this fucking shit.
It's fucking stupid.
Hey, it actually feels really great.
- No. - Okay, Keith.
We have to have a talk.
What?
Listen, there are two kinds of yoga.
We have the restorative, meditative,
peaceful Shavasana like you are doing.
And then we have the angry yoga where we let it out.
And we do fist unicorn.
Fuck shit, cocksucker, motherfucker.
Yeah, fuck that shit.
Excellent, Ysabel.
Okay. Come on, Ysabel.
Come on, we go.
What do you mean?
- What? - We go.
- What about Keith? - What?
It's okay.
Hey.
You have to let out the anger, Keith.
Until then, bye bye.
What do you mean bye bye?
Where are you going?
Bye bye.
Let out your anger.
I'm not angry.
I just can't walk.
You're taking a wheelchair from a man who can't walk.
Okay, bye bye.
What?
You're gonna stand there.
A couple of pricks, man.
Really?
Is this fun for you?
They just left me there.
Gordon had a program and you did not participate.
But I did.
I want you to talk to mini Keith here
and say the things that you've been afraid to say.
Don't hold back.
Everything that you're feeling towards Keith
that you want to say,
you say it to him, to mini Keith.
If we don't have sex for another nine months,
I mean, I would much prefer that that doesn't happen.
But my point is that it doesn't matter.
And I just want you to be happy.
And I want you to laugh again,
because you're the funniest person I know.
I love you so much.
The stupider the approach, the more people loved it.
And the more people loved it, the better it worked for them.
It was unbelievable.
Oh my God!
- Keith, you're walking. - Easy, easy.
Legs, legs, legs, legs.
- You're walking. - Yes, I'm walking.
He is a genius.
Yeah, we're doing sexual things.
Yes, we are. We're doing.
Did you at any point
believe you had the power to heal?
And I give you the light here.
Are you ready to receive it?
Look, you have all these people
who are changing in front of your very eyes,
you start to believe your own hype.
Oh, wow!
Wow!
I really wanna do that.
Did you believe that he could heal people?
Why not?
People like him often have special powers.
People flocked to the camp.
I mean, at the beginning we wanted to make
a small documentary with a handful of people.
Now we're getting dozens.
And we're getting amazing footage.
But Seymour, he started believing his own BS.
The Renaissance.
The most fantastic periods in humankind
because it took us from the dark ages,
the time of repression, oppression and depression.
And it let us out to expression.
Now, the words
in English mean rebirth.
So today, we are going to have a rebirth.
I want to thank miss Nicole over here.
She was the inspiration for this work of art,
our own renaissance period.
And I'm going to present to you,
the masterpiece, Nicole's vagina.
Being a gay man, I've never been around a vagina.
I mean, I haven't really been around a lot.
Hey, Jimmy you're okay.
Come on, Layla.
We're gonna go break through
the mental placenta and rebirth.
I took the plunge, went up the slide
and I shot right out.
And I was like, this is what it feels like
to be back in my mom's womb and coming out.
But I actually think I was a C-section baby.
So I'm not really sure if that really relates to that.
Go, go, go.
Ooh, la, la.
Ooh, la, la, come on down the slide.
Go.
He'd commissioned an artist to sculpt the vagina
in the liking of a famous porn star.
$25,000.
I'm really proud of this.
I love Gordon and I love Reboot.
I'm really, really happy to support his work with my art.
But he was blowing through our budget.
How bad was it?
It's never good when you gotta call the producer
and ask for more.
But as we know from the secret,
when you need something, it magically appears.
Don't you worry, Coop.
We'll take good care of her.
Okay. Bye.
- So we have her for the shoot. - No freaking way, man.
- It's not that big a deal. - Dude, we give in now,
we've lost the whole damn project.
You're being a little dramatic.
- Dramatic? - Yeah.
It's the same producer shit as always.
Dangle the money and dance monkey dance.
Come on. She's just an actress.
- Oh, an actress. - Plus she has
- production experience. - Come on!
She's a failed actress and a wannabe producer.
She's a charity case, gonna poke her nose in our shit.
So you got something to hide, 'cause I don't.
Seymour, she's his niece.
You know the rule.
What do you care?
We always have a line producer.
- So she's the line producer. - Horrible idea.
Look, every leader has a strong second.
A lieutenant.
Someone working things behind the scenes.
Seymour loved the idea of having a fluffer.
Not everyone has the luxury
of just shooting and directing.
Someone had to manage this whole charade.
That was good.
You must be Seymour, which must make you Danny.
Gordon St. Pierre at your service, madame.
Dear Lord.
I'm sorry. Why are you filming?
That's how documentaries are made.
Yeah, I didn't sign up for a reality TV show.
Okay. Let's take it back.
No.
We're making a groundbreaking documentary film here.
It's amazing footage.
You're gonna freak out when you see it.
Okay, let me clarify something.
I'm doing Cooper a favor.
I don't need this.
I had a recurring role on "Whistleblowers."
I was a guest star on "Donnie B. English"
and a judge on "Canadian Beacon."
Canadian bacon?
- "Canadian Beacon." - Wow! What's that?
That's funny.
Claire, we're so happy to have you honestly.
All your experience we could use.
We're so happy.
Experience.
We said from the beginning
it'd be just him and I and a second camera guy.
No PAs, no crew that could leak information.
We couldn't afford a single slip up.
I thought the producer was gonna pull the plug
if we didn't hire her.
Isn't that great? Isn't that what we always wanted?
I saw that.
Dude, what the hell is wrong with you?
What, man?
She's gonna fuck shit up.
We need the money. Remember?
Air is what we're going to work on today.
Because from air come?
- Life. - Life. Excellent.
We are going to not only take in air,
but we're going to take in energy.
The white light is gonna come through with the breathing.
Everyone toes together, eyes closed, palms out
and breathe in.
Breathe in the energy and the white light
and come to heart center, exhale.
Again, breathe in.
And exhale to heart center.
Claire, come on, come on.
You have to get a lung full, huh?
I'm just gonna take a look at it.
Claire,.
Take off the shoes, huh?
Let's feel the earth, everyone.
Grab with the toes the grass.
Feel it as we take another lung full.
Claire, come on.
Dig into the ground and go.
Claire, come on.
Deep breath in.
Again, heart center, blow out.
Deep breath in.
Again on your own. Claire, come on.
And together.
Everyone, Claire is officially a member of the camp now.
She did it as a sign.
Come on. What do we say to Claire?
We say, love and light.
Claire definitely had a broomstick up her bum.
I am so sorry.
Are you serious right now?
- You almost wet my book. - I'm very sorry.
This is a very important book.
My mother gave this to me.
I hate using that word, but she was a raging bitch.
We had to get Claire on board.
Campers were complaining.
Danny was going nuts.
Look, I know she's your niece and everything.
But if we could please just remove her from the project.
She's really messing it up, dude.
No can do.
No can do, compadre.
She is family.
She's jeopardizing the entire project, Coop.
Look, I know she can be a tough cookie
but she can be a great asset.
She's fighting with the campers.
I just saw her inside.
She was fighting with this dude, Herbert.
Fine.
I'll talk to her, okay?
But you guys have to win her over.
Just tell Seymour to sprinkle some of his guru magic on her.
A little to the left.
What?
Not you, her.
Oh, no.
I am not having a romantic dinner with you.
Okay, it's not a romantic dinner.
Hey, hey.
I will make a deal with you.
Give me three guesses about you and your life.
For everyone I get right,
you take a step forward towards me.
I get all three right, then you stay.
I get even one wrong, you can go.
Deal?
Okay, fine.
Okay.
You pride yourself as being this great independent thinker
but you actually don't trust anyone or anything
unless you have definitive proof.
Sometimes, not always,
you doubt the choices you've made in life.
Yes. Even confident Claire.
You have like this unbelievable amount of unused potential
that somehow you haven't taken advantage of.
Okay, Ms. Cleo.
You got me.
Thank you for humoring me.
God, is it really that simple?
A sucker born every day.
Look, were not psychics.
But, yeah.
I mean, if we can show that not even just suckers,
but regular people, smart, freethinking people
can be susceptible to these con men and con women,
well, we'll have made something great, wouldn't we have?
And what about you?
You're an actress, right?
Why not have the perfect role for yourself?
I'll make you a deal.
You teach a session tomorrow, see how it feels.
If you like it, you stay.
If you don't, you go.
Okay.
I will.
Was this like closing the deal for you?
I just don't eat carbs.
Oh! Right.
Mistake numero uno.
Are you going to just stand there and resist everything?
Because if that's what you're gonna do,
you might as well sit down.
I just can't look at you.
- Get up. - Okay.
Do you always do what people tell you to do?
I don't know.
What uncomfortable thing are you willing to do
to get closer to your bliss?
Oh, God!
I'll sing.
Because you're afraid of what people will think?
No, I just really hate my voice.
Are we going to make Anita feel bad?
- No. - Come on, gang.
We love Anita.
We love you.
We love Anita.
- So, Anita, what song are you going to sing? - Deep breath.
♪ Hello, my honey ♪
♪ Hello, my baby ♪
♪ Hello, my ragtime gal ♪
♪ Send me a kiss by wire ♪
♪ Baby, my heart's on fire ♪
♪ If you release me ♪
♪ Baby, you'll lose me ♪
♪ Hey, you'll be left alone ♪
♪ Oh baby cell phone ♪
♪ And tell me I'm your own ♪
Oh, and big finish.
Yeah, Anita.
It's fantastic.
Fantastic. Fantastic.
- Sit on down. - Excellent effort.
Let me get the visor.
- Excellent. Excellent. - All right, who's next?
You.
From that point on, she was in.
I mean, she pulled a complete 180.
Herbert has something very important
he'd like to share.
I did what you told me.
I left Marissa.
Here. Take it.
I don't want it anymore.
Throw it away.
No more viruses for me.
And I'm moving in.
Yeah, reboot 24/7.
That's what I need.
I'm staying.
Okay.
We'll talk about this.
Okay, Herbert?
Come on, Herbie.
Chop, Chop.
Lots of things to do.
Danny thinks Claire put Herbert up to it.
Did his presence in the house
affect your project?
Well, not at first, but in hindsight,
we should never let him move in.
Why?
Because it gave Claire her first disciple.
At that point, we'd been running the camp,
shooting the documentary for months.
I was exhausted.
Seymour was exhausted.
Claire just turned it up a notch.
You really don't know how lucky you are
to have access to Gordon.
I mean, he really is much more enlightened than he leads on.
I really shouldn't be telling you this story
but Gordon saved my leg.
I was in the middle of a nasty divorce
and my ex had taken all my savings
and changed the lock to our apartment.
So I had lunch at a diner.
I ended up reading a book that someone had left.
It's funny how sometimes books find us, don't they?
Yeah.
This one was called, "I Love Dick."
It was about female struggle for power.
It inspired me to go for a hike
through the national park where I met some hikers
that invited me to come with them
to a designated dark sky area,
which is basically a spot with no light pollution.
All of a sudden, something scraped across my legs.
Something bit me.
So I jumped up and fell right back down.
In the matter of minutes, I had a 100-degree fever.
I was shivering and we were one full day hike away
from my car and right there,
I just lost all feeling in my legs and just passed out.
Turns out Gordon was one of the hikers.
No way.
And he performed a cleansing ritual on my leg.
And the next morning I woke up feeling brand new.
It's amazing.
If it weren't for Gordon, I'd be in a wheelchair.
And here I am.
- Wow. - Yeah.
The more unbelievable the stories
about the leader's greatness,
the more followers believe it
because it confirms their dedication.
It tells them, I'm in the presence of greatness.
Fantastic.
Fantastic. Yeah.
Yeah.
Life-changing.
My mates told me you could fix my problems.
Stand up onto this...
Stand up.
- What? On this thing? - Oh yeah.
Yeah, go on.
Do I look the same or do I look different?
Oh, now you look small, 'cause I'm looking at-
Aha!
Now sit again.
Breathin' and standing on a sofa is not gonna fix it.
It's the women.
There's too many.
I think the problem is the talking.
The talking.
They talk, I can't shut 'em up.
You cannot hear if you are talking.
If we change the way we look at things,
the things we look at, they change.
- Are you all right? - How do you feel?
It was my pleasure to help you.
Love and light.
What?
That's the answer.
Stand on a sofa.
Yes.
He explained to me that standing on a sofa
can change everything.
Everything.
And that's why
you're standing on a sofa now?
Because he healed me.
To most of us, he was more than just a guy.
He was our spiritual leader.
Feel nature through the fingertips.
Bless you, my son.
- Yeah, thank you. - Bless you.
So much love for all of you.
You're fantastic all of you.
Claire approached me about doing this special effect.
She wanted to have Gordon walk on water.
It's ridiculous.
I mean, it's easy.
You use some clear plexi and whatever
but I told her it's too hokey.
Danny was becoming more and more negative.
If we can feature her a little more.
- Sex sells. - Oh, guys.
That's all I'm saying.
Boy, do I have a surprise for you?
Check it out.
What the hell is this?
It's called "Rebooting Your Bliss."
Yeah, I can read, Claire.
What's it supposed to be?
Okay, chill.
Every organization has its manual.
That's all it is.
Manual? Where do you get all the materials for this?
Oh, Seymour was kind enough to give me his notes.
Right, Seymour?
You knew about this, bro?
We could use handouts.
Handouts? This is a fucking hard cover.
I mean, anything Claire said, he would just shut it down.
One day, I went out to get some equipment
but I left my wallet.
So I went back.
He was glistening like a stuck pig.
Were they having an affair?
He sure loved the attention.
An affair?
No.
I mean, not really.
Danny thinks you might have.
He was pawing her like a horny little shitzu.
It was embarrassing.
It went on like that for awhile.
I tried to reason with my brother.
He was not listening.
But then, I ran into Grace.
Danny was really concerned about Seymour.
He felt that Claire was taking over the project
and he didn't know what to do.
He didn't want to abandon his brother.
And she sends me this photo, this stupid cat photo.
I sent him this photo.
But I hung in there.
Can't believe I sent him that.
This lady beside me, she had this little case.
And inside that case where two chihuahuas.
Two male chihuahuas.
And those two chihuahuas,
they started fornicatin' right there on the plane.
And I'm saying, "God, how can I concentrate on the gospel?
How can I concentrate on my sermon
when I'm sitting here witnessing gay canine fornication?"
And he said, "Son, here's what you need to do.
You need to get yourself your own aeroplane."
I said, "God, I'm a man of simple means.
I can't afford an aeroplane, God."
And he said, "Talk to your congregation."
Sects sell.
They're financed through member contributions.
The lifestyles of some of these plastic shamans
are extraordinary.
Exotic car collections, private jets.
They heard what God said, and they reached down deep
and they provided.
They provided me with this aeroplane,
and here we are today with mags and I can get there faster.
I can get there before the fornicators.
I can get there before the demons
and I can spread God's good word.
And if they're designated a religion, it's even tax-free.
How many copies did you make?
- A thousand. - A thousand?
- Uh-huh. - What for?
$24 and 99 cents per copy.
We'll be making 25 grand selling these puppies.
We are not making money off these people.
Period. It's part of the rules.
Rules are meant to be broken.
If ethical issues aren't enough, think legal, Claire.
All right, let's just hear her out.
- Yes. - I'm not hearing her out.
Do you both have a major malfunction?
This is a documentary, Seymour.
It's not real. Get your head straight.
What if Cooper pulls funding?
Would you do it then?
We are not making money off these people.
Period.
You're not helping very much when you're ripping them off.
But how can you help people unless you have the time
and the gift to help and it takes your life?
We were proving our premise way beyond the original idea.
The key rule was, do not take their money.
And isn't that what film is about?
Pushing the boundaries?
Make sure you get this.
Hey, Seymour.
Hey, bro.
How's it going?
Good, good, good.
Good.
Look, see.
It's time to pull the plug, man.
You know what, Danny? You're bringing everybody down.
Maybe it's you should take a few weeks off.
We're going down a very slippery path.
Well, good, 'cause that's what art is.
It's slippery. It's challenging.
Don't fucking patronize me, Seymour.
I know what art is.
Well then, you know we're doing
something groundbreaking here.
Nobody's shot anything like this.
Isn't that what we're doing here?
To make something groundbreaking?
It was groundbreaking.
Now you're standing here in this weird ass pose
holding a dolphin?
Fuck off, Danny.
I'm not the bad guy here.
To be honest, I had my doubts about Seymour at first.
Danny, no.
He was the real deal.
You know, he had that filmmaker's obsession.
We always liked Danny.
I feel like you really connected with Danny.
Who's Danny?
Danny loved cameras.
He was a quiet boy.
Didn't do a sport like the other kids.
We mostly ran around the backyard
doing these little short films.
When he got into the film school,
the first person that he called was Sims.
That's what he called his brother.
He was so proud when he got into Cal Arts.
I mean, Danny was gonna be the next Tim Burton.
Dropping out of Cal Arts was a huge blow for him.
His dad was pushing his buttons, so he left.
He sleep in our guest room for months.
He ended up in production, but local production.
You know, like commercial for a car dealership, furniture.
To Danny, Reboot Camp was his way out
of furniture commercial hell.
I couldn't let him give that up.
We always had differences of opinion, man.
I mean, it's part of the creative process,
but I did wanna make a groundbreaking film.
So I decided to remain open-minded,
take some time off, clear my head.
However, I left a couple hidden cameras behind.
Yeah.
Why, hello. It's so good to see you.
Oh, nice to see you.
Hello, monsieur Ja.
How you doing, man?
Hello. Hello, Mr. Koech.
- How are you? - How are you?
- Good, good. - So good to see you.
I'm happy you can make it today.
Heard so many things about you.
Yes, thank you.
Yes, from this young lady. It's fantastic.
She's my angel, Claire.
She really talked you up.
I'll tell you that.
She's really the brains behind the operation.
It's been really wonderful.
It's actually Cooper's house.
Yeah, nice. I'm feeling the love. Look at those eyes.
And then let's go, like, let's do like a thing...
There's a heightened level of narcissism
with celebrities, that everybody's looking at me
and everyone's talking about me.
So I think it was especially effective for celebrities.
You know, Hollywood is a tough town.
It's very hard.
And you gotta take any advantage you can get.
And you know, some of the things you were saying last night
and like that some of the things you've done
and working with some of my friends,
it seems to have elevated their career.
And so I'm looking to possibly level up.
We don't get to what we want, and it's hey!
I have a lot of anger.
- A lot of anger? - Yeah.
And how do you deal with this anger?
I'll break things.
I hate my neighbor and I'll break shit of his.
I learned something very important about anger.
All right, here it comes.
There was a mosquito on my testicle.
Now, the first reaction is, oh, there's a mosquito.
You don't want to hit your balls.
And I learned on that day,
do not respond to anger with violence.
Took me six months to recover from that mosquito.
I had a similar incident.
Yes, please.
I put like Bengay too close to my leg
and it got to my balls.
Yeah. Worst feeling in the world.
It is the fire, huh.
Yeah, yeah.
Fire on the balls.
Yeah. Fire on the balls.
It's not good. Not good.
Not good.
- This is why we're talking. - This is why I came
to you, guru, because I have anger issues too, guru.
I wanna get rid of the anger once and for all.
What we're gonna do is we're gonna make the angry face.
Okay.
- All right. - Let's make the angry face.
All the shit, which we want to get rid of,
I'm gonna put it on the Polaroid
and we're gonna throw the paper away.
Just like that?
Just like this. Okay?
Well, I'm going to start with you, Mr. Koech.
Oh, that was a fantastic face.
- Mr. Ja. - I was not happy at all.
Oh, that's a good face.
I like it.
It is nice.
This is your Polaroid.
So guys, this may take a few seconds to start up.
Yeah. Yeah.
I want to work on an exercise for you.
It's been very effective for the people in the camp.
I'm going to demonstrate.
It's very simple.
We bring in the white light.
And as we exhale.
Fuck shit. Fuck shit, motherfucker.
Fuck shit, fuck!
Fuck, motherfucker.
Cocksucker.
Fuck shit, cocksucker.
- Shit, bitch. - Let it out. Come on, Koech.
Fucking shit, cocksucker.
Yeah!
Motherfucker you shit bitch cunt shit.
Motherfucking, cock-sucking son of a bitch.
Fuck you!
- Oh, guys. - Love it.
High five, high five.
Fantastic!
Wow, that was effective.
And I didn't know if this stuff was gonna work, but it did.
I think angry yoga really worked.
I mean, I think Ja Rule and David Koechner especially
had a complete breakthrough with the angry yoga.
Okay, let us see now where the picture's at.
Can I see the angry face?
Ja, what do you see?
What do you see when you look at this angry face?
I see...
♪ I see dreams of blue ♪
♪ And colors of white ♪
♪ And as I see ♪
♪ The darkness of night ♪
♪ And I think to myself ♪
Fuck shit, fuck shit, fuck shit.
- Motherfucker. - Fuck shit up, motherfucker.
We're gonna fuck shit up.
One.
Two.
Three.
Fuck shit!
Funny enough, the reality stars were a problem.
Poo!
This is shit and this is what you need.
More shit.
I don't know what it is
with that particular group of people.
I couldn't quite crack them.
- Yes. Okay. - Do another color.
I'm getting there.
- Yes, there. - I might cry.
I've noticed a common theme from your painting,
and that is the poo poo.
What is your obsession with the poopoo?
I feel like people really let go of things
through the anus.
- The anus? - Yes.
People are telling me you're fighting on the TV.
Why are you fighting?
See, the thing is is that I'm always right?
And people think that I'm wrong, but I'm always right.
It is more important to be happy
than to be right.
I'm happy when I poop.
You are a wonderful human being.
Thank you.
And don't let the virus clog the mind
of the things that you think are right or wrong,
but just be okay with right now,
who you are in this moment.
I'm really hot.
Yes. You're very nice.
I love myself.
Self-love is good.
I think they are just on another level
of narcissistic way of life
that even I couldn't crack.
This Johnny Bananas was quite bananas.
Trust.
- Gordon, you want gum? - Johnny, it's not nice.
- What are you doing? - All this gum right here.
No, I can't take your gum.
Hey, Johnny.
No, I'm also a germaphobe.
She want gum.
You want me to stop?
No. This needs to fucking stop.
- This is all fake. - This is my true brother.
There's no one way like fake your fucking accent.
Listen, you guys are all being conned.
You're better off lighting $500 on fire.
This is a sleep-away camp of morons, all right?
Okay, go. Bye. Bye.
Namaste this, motherfuckers.
I thought, Jeez.
I think this guy is like ready to go with me.
And luckily we got them out of there pretty quickly
before they could infect the rest of the camp.
Thank you for being part of this world now with us.
We look forward to having you around.
Oh, we're part of this world?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
No, yeah. We're in this.
We're in this.
It's great.
Yes, listen to your husband.
You know, we can give him a ride down the vagina slide
in a preparation for what's coming out of the stomach
through the canal.
You could really channel your child.
That'll help me get over my fear.
You know the fear of the, fear of all the...
It's a baby.
It is a fantastic experience.
Oh, the brownies are nice, huh?
Where is sugar that brown again.
Oh, looking nice, looking brownies.
Yeah, very nice.
Don't mind if I do.
Oh,.
I may take one.
I really needed to get me a brownie
before that camera gets here.
Wait, wait, wait.
♪ Let me show you who I am ♪
♪ Time to live it up ♪
♪ You can give it up for one more night ♪
♪ Feeling getting higher ♪
I'd taken a few weeks off to clear my head.
When I was finally ready to come back,
I didn't tell anyone.
I wanted it to be a surprise.
Oh my God.
- That was so close. - Oh my God, Danny.
Danny.
Danny, where you been, bro?
Good to see you.
Hey.
Marissa and Laryssa, who? Huh?
- Danny. - Danny.
Oh my God. We missed you.
I knew you'd come back.
- Hey, come into the party. - You're just in time
for the party, come on.
♪ Say whatever 'cause it's still right behind me ♪
- Babe. - What?
You're pregnant.
Oh yeah.
Cheers.
Hey, man.
What is this?
We have celebrities now?
Hey.
Yeah, Claire thought it would be good for the documentary.
Hello.
So she's directing the film now?
Come on, man. You've been gone for two weeks.
Gordon! Gordon, come here.
Okay,.
I'm gonna go over there.
Have a nice time.
Hey, guys.
Hello. Hello.
Seymour basically let Claire take over.
We had created a cult.
Seymour wasn't Gordon anymore.
He was now the Sherpa.
What's funny is, he didn't even see the irony.
She renamed him.
He's a Sherpa?
Well, that's what I thought
you camp members called him.
Oh, I thought a Sherpa helps you summit Everest.
But didn't you climb some of your problems?
Oh, that's interesting.
Wow. I hadn't thought of it that way.
Yeah.
Cult leaders often rename members
to strip them of their identity.
It has a very deep, psychological side effect
because our parents name us.
So assigning names asserts the leader as a parent.
It's very powerful.
I think that's what happened with Claire.
You know, she's so strikingly beautiful
and powerful and smart
that she just seems special and amazing.
And she makes you feel special and amazing.
Sherpa Gordon is now going to lead us
through a very spiritual meditation.
- Oh my God. - Thank you so much.
I want you to raise the arms as one, up into the air.
And then Seymour showed me some footage
they captured during my absence.
He was quite proud of it.
Anita, what color do you have under there?
I have on black.
Good. Take off your blouse.
You knew today was black day.
We don't want any color pollution.
- Right? - Oh, I'm sorry.
But I thought that I could just kinda...
Take it off.
All right, everyone.
We are all going to do a fantastic exercise-
Claire, I'm sorry.
I'm actually really not comfortable with that.
Reboot Camp only works if everyone is 100% on board.
Am I right?
Gordon pushed us past our comfort zones,
but she was a drill sergeant.
She actually enjoyed bossing people around.
Especially me.
We're gonna take a deep inhale
from all the way down.
Deep inhale.
And as we exhale, we're gonna go, reboot.
Reboot.
Inhale.
- Reboot. - Reboot.
Inhale. Keep going.
Reboot.
Faster.
Reboot.
Keep going.
Reboot.
And faster.
Reboot.
- Faster. - Reboot.
Is this normal to you?
'cause this is not normal, Seymour.
It's like the Stanford experiment.
Fuck the Stanford experiment.
We've proven plenty of points.
- It's time to end this. - All right, take a breath.
Guys, guys, guys.
You don't realize what you've created here.
Oh God.
Deepak Chopra is worth $100 million.
Tony Robbins, half a billion.
So? What's your point?
The Moonies guy's worth a billion.
Doesn't mean we should create a cult to get rich.
Not a cult.
A real self-help organization.
I don't know about you guys, but I am sick and tired
of chasing the carrot.
I am sick and tired of begging Cooper for a job.
I'm done with the bit parts.
Guys, we have great footage here.
This documentary is gonna do very well.
This is not funny.
Oh yeah? And what if it flops?
You wanna go back to shooting furniture commercials?
Listen, think about it.
Books.
Events.
Retreats.
It'll fund your future.
You can shoot whatever film you want
without some asshole producer telling you what to do.
And the best part, we're actually helping people.
It's the ultimate win-win.
Did you consider ditching the film project
and continuing the cult?
You mean the self-help empire?
Danny thinks she did.
Danny's an amazing kid.
You know?
I don't think he's got a bad bone in his body.
And that's the worst part for me.
Losing my brother over this.
Claire was doing to me
what I was doing to these poor people.
I just didn't wanna see it.
To capture that,
that was pure luck.
Danny showed me the footage.
She's fleecing people and he's seeing
a cinematic masterpiece unfolding in front of his eyes.
And what does he do?
He goes and shows Claire the hidden camera footage.
He betrayed you?
I think he underestimated Claire's capacity
for self preservation.
All the love, let it out.
Let it out.
In the state of California, it is unlawful
for any person to videotape film
or digitally record another person
without that person's consent.
Claire, you're in my shot.
In a bathroom, bedroom or any location
where a person has a reasonable expectation of privacy.
And especially if the person is urinating, defecating,
undressing, nude, or involved in sexual intercourse.
- Hey, what? - Hey, hey.
What's going on here?
Your little brother's a pervert. That's what's going on.
What?
This is bullshit.
Oh yeah? And how do you explain this?
He set up hidden cameras in the bathroom
and recorded people doing all kinds of stuff.
Yeah, right.
No, I didn't, Sims.
Dude, why would you...
This is disgusting.
I didn't do that.
I didn't believe it.
I still don't believe it.
He was such a nice, quiet boy.
Yeah, they usually are.
They were making a documentary
and he was taping people having sex.
That's what they say.
But to me, he was just-
One word.
Peeping Tom.
That's two words.
Everything happens for a reason.
What does that even mean?
It means don't do the crime if you can't-
Shut up.
Shut up?
Never underestimate the power of stupid people
in large groups.
Oh yeah.
Well, you joined too, asshole.
Anyway, Danny was an awesome guy.
I mean, super talented.
He had to have been set up.
That's right.
- It's just that simple. - Absolutely.
Live by the sword, die by the sword.
Right?
Where else can you hike in the middle of a major city?
Do you believe Danny was set up by Claire?
Do you see that haze?
That's not small.
That's the spirit of all the dreams of everyone
that comes here looking for success.
God, I love LA.
I still had all this unresolved stuff with Grace, right?
Because she was my wife and I trusted her.
But then I discovered all this crap.
And I figured, well, she lied to me.
So why not Danny?
She Photoshopped the background,
made it look like I installed the cameras.
It's pretty good.
Why didn't you show it to Seymour?
He sided with the enemy, man.
And I was love bombed.
Claire love bombed me
and turned me into one of her disciples.
I was done?
I was done.
The whole project turned into a con.
But it was a con from the very beginning.
You must have seen the irony.
He's my brother, and I took her side.
And that's just wrong.
♪ I've been waiting here ♪
♪ Chicken scratch bears come to pass ♪
♪ As I have ripped the last of me ♪
♪ Can't you see ♪
♪ I've been wasting here ♪
♪ And I've been wasting here ♪
♪ I forgot how to breathe ♪
There's this saying.
You don't know you're in a cult until the last 10 minutes.
My last 10 minutes happened a few days after Danny left.
I have some very shocking news, but I feel like,
I can't keep the secret much longer,
but I spotted Danny placing some cameras
all over the mansion and look,
it turns out he's...
- Oh my God. - He's quite the pervert.
- Oh my gosh. - I have the pictures
- and videos to prove it. - No, you don't.
No, you don't.
Wait a second. I think this is very inappropriate.
No, don't even look at it.
It hurts out as much as you do.
Danny's a dear friend of mine.
Danny's a good friend of mine, I love Danny.
So I finally put all the pieces together and realized
that she doctored this footage and set Danny up.
The original plan was we were gonna end this documentary
with a bang.
Have this big screening where we show the film
to the campers and then reveal that it was all fake,
and let them peek behind the curtain
and see all this behind the scenes footage.
Now, I had to improvise.
Maisey, I wanted to talk to you first,
because you are my most loyal camper.
Really, truly.
I'm not Sherpa Gordon.
My name is Seymour Barr.
And none of this is real.
Thank you, Sherpa.
No, no, no.
I'm not the Sherpa.
I'm a filmmaker.
Do you understand?
Look, I've got some footage here.
I'm really sorry.
You.
Oh, you are one sly fox, Sherpa Gordon.
What? No.
This is it, isn't it?
- No. - This is it, right?
This is the big virus removal.
No, listen, this is a documentary.
This is just a film.
- Thank you. - And this, the Reboot Camp...
Thank you.
Yeah.
You really are the best.
No.
I can't believe that I made it.
I made it up, Maisey.
I've been working so hard and you've been helping me
every step of the way.
I can't believe this.
And this accent on you is amazing.
No, this is me.
- The other guy was the accent. - Thank you.
I approached two other members.
Same thing.
They would not believe me.
They thought it was all part of the reboot.
So I called Claire in for a meeting.
How do you explain Stockholm syndrome?
They are weak.
They wanna be told what to do.
Our product is telling them what to do.
Books, videos, seminars, retreats.
They pay every antivirus session, 200 bucks.
And then, you're gonna love this.
We expand the reboot diet
with fricking reboot supplements.
That's genius.
Well, we're gonna have to change locations
'cause it's Cooper's house.
You can get acreage for cheap
around Kagel Canyon.
We'll build a wellness ranch.
What do we do about Cooper?
About the documentary?
Don't worry about Cooper.
He loved the documentary, but he loves money even more.
I say, "Claire, big idea.
Let's get everyone together,
make a big announcement of how we're moving
to our permanent location.
And she bought it.
So, the plan was once she had everybody out there,
I would then reveal the truth.
The problem is, Maisey spoke to her first.
Hello, Reboot Campers.
We have gathered here today because we have a very big
and important announcement to make.
We have decided to move our beautiful retreat
to a permanent new location.
Thank you.
We have a very big secret to reveal today.
And that secret is...
Is that this is all just an illusion.
My name is not Gordon St. Pierre.
It's Seymour Barr.
And this is just a documentary film.
It's not real.
I mean, I can show you everything.
We've got it on tape from how I came up with the name,
Gordon St. Pierre, to this outfit that is definitely not me.
This is more me.
And even how we came up with the whole Reboot Camp idea.
I'm sorry, but this is a scam.
So just come with me inside.
I'm gonna show you guys some footage
and you'll understand how this whole thing went down.
And again, I'm really sorry.
Bravo!
Bravo, Sherpa Gordon.
- You just blow us away. - No, no.
- No, don't listen to her. - Final reboot.
- No, no, guys. - There you go.
Guys, listen to me.
- I'm American. - Thank you so much.
Let's all give him a hug. Come on.
There is no Gordon.
There is no Sherpa.
Sherpa!
- Sherpa! - No.
- Sherpa! - No Sherpa.
- Sherpa! - There's no Sherpa.
- Sherpa! - Not Sherpa.
Sherpa!
You guys, come on.
Sherpa!
Anita, what was your reaction
when you found out that Gordon was a fake?
I really wish people would stop saying that.
It's so silly.
I got excited because I knew.
Something tingled inside me that said, this is it.
This is the level up.
Okay. Let's go.
Let's power through this.
Which camera can I look in? This one?
Go fuck yourself, Sherpa Gordon.
You took something away from me that I thought was real,
and it wasn't.
That was the beginning,
when I was just turning 30.
Yeah.
Yeah. Good times.
We're younger and skinnier.
A lot skinnier.
Me.
You look the same.
No. Well...
So anyway, Seymour called me that night desperate,
asked me to pick him up.
Yes, and I told her everything.
I didn't show him that hang in there kitty photo.
Thank God.
It's funny that it took a riff with his brother
for actually to reconnect.
So are you two back together again?
No, no, no, no. We're just friends.
Yeah, just friends.
But she is paying me back some of the money she owes me.
Yes, Grace is a life...
- Coach. - Coach, a life coach.
That's a thing.
And apparently pays a lot of money.
I actually get to use everything I learned
at those seminars.
So it wasn't all bullshit.
No. Not all of it.
Just most of it?
Just a little bit.
Seymour, how long has it been
since you last spoke to your brother?
It's been a little while.
You know, I'm the big brother.
I should have taken his side no matter what,
and I did not.
It's just, Claire showed me this bathroom footage
and it was so incriminating.
I didn't know what to do with it.
I spoke to him recently
and he doesn't blame you for what happened.
I just thought he should tell you himself.
Look at this guy.
That the face of a cult leader or what?
You look good, little bro.
You too, man.
Oh, dude.
I'm sorry, man.
I'm really sorry I let someone get between us.
Shut up, man.
We both fucked up.
Yeah.
Danny, do you maintain your innocence?
We both ended up doing the exact opposite
of what we intended.
We're both guilty of that.
No, I meant recording people
in the bathroom.
I was played. Plain and simple.
Those were my cameras.
Just wasn't me who planted them.
Yeah. He was played.
Come here. I wanna show you something.
So, the cult is now over 300 members.
Look at this shit.
Wow.
Yeah.
- Crazy. - Right?
She calls it the Reboot Collective.
It's got a nice ring to it.
So brother man.
Yeah.
Let's say you and I finish what we started here.
- You took the last drive. - Hell yeah!
What, did you think I was gonna leave it there?
I'm assuming Cooper's out of the picture.
Cooper is out, but we have a new executive producer
who's much prettier.
Yeah.
Grace decided not to pay me back
the money she owes me in cash,
but she is funding the completion of our documentary.
Wow!
Thank you. Thank you.
It's the least I can do.
I'm a little verklempt over here.
Sir?
Sir, good morning, sir.
Looking for your wide emotional baggage?
No.
So we found out that they were proselytizing
at this supermarket parking lot.
Now, proselytizing has two values for cult leaders.
One, obviously it gets them new recruits,
but the other is the art of pitching
actually connects the camper more to the whole thing.
And here we go.
We can't talk to you.
What?
- Crystal, come on, it's me. - I'm sorry.
- Listen. - We can't talk to you.
Hey.
Hey. Hey.
We approached over 100 people.
No one wanted to hear what we had to say.
Who the fuck is this guy?
Is he a bodyguard or something?
She got bodyguards now?
She got bodyguard? Jesus.
What is that? Look at this car.
All right, all right.
He's taking off.
Wait, so that's Claire.
Let's go.
Holy shit.
Claire!
Hey, Claire.
Claire, can we talk?
Hey, pervert.
We even had a drone fly over and drop off flyers,
and nothing.
Did anyone talk to you?
Okay, there's someone.
Who is it?
Looks like Herbert.
- Is that Herb? - Yeah.
- Hey, Herb. - Hey, bud.
How are you?
Hi.
What's up, brother?
Herb.
How may I help you gentlemen?
Well, Herb, it's us.
Thank you, we're all stocked up here
and we don't take solicitations.
No, Herbert it's me, Seymour and Danny.
We wanna talk to you, man.
With all due respect, I must go.
Have an enchanted day.
And love and light.
- Herbert, come on, man. - Herb, are you joking?
Dude...
It's a scam, Herbert.
Don't listen to her.
Herb, it's not real.
Come on, dude. Just talk to us.
Herb.
He's gone, man.
Let's just go.
We'll come back.
After everything you went through,
what is your biggest takeaway?
Don't hire the producer's cousin.
- Niece. - Niece, cousin, whatever.
Don't hire any family members, period.
To me, we played God and it bit us in the ass.
You can't mess with people, even if it's for a good cause.
And the irony is, this documentary is now about us.
And I think we've proven in a very painful roundabout way
that anyone, including yours truly,
can fall prey to a charismatic leader.
And in the process we created a cult.
In breaking news,
Gordon St. Pierre came clean today,
revealing that Reboot Camp was fake
and created to make a documentary about it.
While some of his former members
were upset by this announcement,
many others still remain in the camp,
which is now being led by a mysterious woman
who goes by the name of Claire.
Welcome to the Reboot Collective.
A spa for your mind, a womb for adults,
where I will personally guide you
to become the best version of your blissful self.
Claire's a bitch, Gordon's a god
and Danny needs to be a freed man.
Danny is not in prison.
What?
Are you still in Claire's Reboot Collective?
Of course.
I love Claire. She's awesome.
I offered Claire my vagina free of charge
and she didn't want it.
Vagina.
We found a way to reconnect.
I do not have time for this shit.
My time with Gordon is over.
My time with my father is over,
and it is time for my time with my mother, Claire.
And what would I say to Claire?
♪ Hello, my baby ♪
♪ Hello, my honey ♪
♪ Hello, my ragtime gal ♪
Take that, Claire.
It's a hall of fame vagina.
I don't get it.
She should have kept it.
I feel the power of enlightenment.
Fuck that shit, motherfucker.
Thank you. I feel the power.
Right?
It's powerful stuff.
Trash, just like this stupid class.
Where do you go from here?
Is it always standing on a sofa now?
Well, I have to buy a sofa
because I don't have a sofa.
So this where I go from here is probably the store.
You gotta get free.
Yeah?
So that's what this is about.
Please, Amazon, get your copy.
You're with another self-help group?
Notmycult.org.
It's people who've had bad experiences with groups.
And, you know, we do like yoga things in the park
and we all have these blue, sky blue shirts that we wear.
It's really great. It's been really helpful.
Can't you-
Can't you tell how it has affected me?
Well, I never knew you prior to this,
but you seem happy, enlightened.
Motherfucker, I used to be loud and shit.
Now, I'm like cool, calm.
You see how quickly I brought that back?
- Wow. - You see what he did?
This is what the guru has done for me.
You see, these cult leaders are very charming.
Cult leader?
Yes.
It's not a cult. It's a club.
I don't think he's even French.
Yo, how many producers does it take
to change a light bulb?
How many?
Good answer?
How many gurus does it take to change a light bulb?
Answer?
None.
Because change must come from within.
Love and light.
♪ Set us free ♪
♪ In this dark ♪
♪ I will need ♪
♪ A light our way back home ♪
♪ Comin' in from the cold ♪
♪ And we'll be all set free ♪
♪ Set us free ♪
♪ In this dark ♪
♪ I will need ♪
♪ A light our way back home ♪
♪ Comin' in from the cold ♪
♪ And we'll be all set free ♪
♪ Let us go ♪
♪ And set us free ♪
♪ Give us what we really need ♪
♪ A little love got you whole ♪
♪ We're burning our souls ♪
♪ And we'll be all set free ♪
♪ So, set us free ♪
♪ Set us free ♪
♪ And give us a walk ♪
♪ That we all need ♪
♪ Light our way back home ♪
♪ Comin' in from the cold ♪
♪ And we'll be all set free ♪
♪ Set us free ♪
I have another joke.
What do you call a woody that likes to peck?
Woody, woodpecker.
I'm going to work on this one.
No idea.
It came out of my ass.
So we're going to continue with the vagina jokes
for your therapy.
What'd you call a Roman with a big smile
and a pubic hair between the teeth.
I don't know.
Gladiator.
Glad he ate her.
I have a telephone call from Mike.
Mike who?
Hunt.
Mike Hunt.
Telephone call for Mike Hunt.
Okay.
Mike Hunt.
That was for porkies.
The diner.
♪ I just bought a new one ♪
♪ Spinning caught the thousand just to cruise in ♪
♪ Shorty say she love me ♪
♪ But I swear she never prove it ♪
♪ I never tell her but I put it in the music ♪
♪ Well, that's okay ♪
♪ All I wanna do is make the best of my whole day ♪
♪ Thank the Lord up above ♪
♪ Get the cream on his side ♪
♪ Make you'd have to know it ♪
♪ That's the stuff that I love ♪
♪ We can be friends if you wanna ♪
♪ We can just talk if you wanna ♪
♪ We could hold hands if you wanna ♪
♪ Hey, tell me what you wanna do ♪
♪ We could just laugh if you wanna ♪
♪ Laying eyes on the stars of you wanna ♪
♪ We could just kiss if you wanna ♪
♪ Hey, tell me what you wanna do ♪
♪ It's like the story of my life ♪
♪ Best friend, but we're rocking all the same things ♪
♪ So you need me but you really trying to change lanes ♪
♪ Well, I don't even care ♪
♪ Live my life, I don't got it with no fair ♪
♪ Fighting dragons, always been a real one ♪
♪ Hate you saying you showing love ♪
♪ You a real chameleon ♪
♪ Get the facts freaking straight ♪
♪ Always RNP ♪
♪ We could be friends if you wanna ♪
♪ We can just talk if you wanna ♪
♪ We could hold hands if you wanna ♪
♪ Hey, tell me what you wanna do ♪
♪ We could just laugh if you wanna ♪
♪ Laying eyes on the stars if you wanna ♪
♪ We could just kiss if you wanna ♪
♪ Hey, tell me what you wanna do ♪
So would you recommend Reboot Camp to others?
I would.
Actually, I would.
You're a true convert of Reboot Camp.
Thank you, man.
I appreciate you, man.
All right, all right.
Reboot Camp, baby.
Reboot this bitch.
Provided by explosiveskull https://twitter.com/kaboomskull