1 00:00:15,808 --> 00:00:19,770 -(crowd whooping and cheering) -(players clamoring) 2 00:00:23,274 --> 00:00:25,151 There's just something about a man covered in paint. 3 00:00:25,359 --> 00:00:28,446 -Mmm. -Dude, are you studying at a tailgate? 4 00:00:28,529 --> 00:00:29,989 Yeah, but only because I'm failing Econ. 5 00:00:30,072 --> 00:00:31,824 Maybe you'd be doing better if you didn't spend 6 00:00:31,907 --> 00:00:33,993 -so much time railing Leighton's brother. -Okay. 7 00:00:34,118 --> 00:00:35,411 (imitating squeaking bedframe) 8 00:00:35,494 --> 00:00:37,955 Bela! You just spilled beer all over my textbook! 9 00:00:38,038 --> 00:00:39,915 Oh, my God. I'm so sorry. 10 00:00:39,999 --> 00:00:42,752 And Nico's bed doesn't squeak like that. 11 00:00:42,835 --> 00:00:44,712 It thuds. Like bam, bam bam... 12 00:00:44,795 --> 00:00:45,713 Hello, ladies. 13 00:00:45,796 --> 00:00:47,131 -Hi, Leighton. -Hi, Leighton. 14 00:00:47,631 --> 00:00:49,550 Wait. Why did you stop talking when I showed up? 15 00:00:51,177 --> 00:00:52,344 Is it my glasses? 16 00:00:52,428 --> 00:00:55,097 I know they're ugly, but my fucking mom forgot to send my contacts. 17 00:00:55,181 --> 00:00:58,017 No, it's just surprising that you came. 18 00:00:58,684 --> 00:01:01,479 Well, I'm not really jazzed to watch soccer, 19 00:01:01,562 --> 00:01:02,897 but I did want to come and support Whitney. 20 00:01:02,980 --> 00:01:04,315 You like Whitney? 21 00:01:04,398 --> 00:01:06,484 Yes, I like Whitney. She's our roommate. 22 00:01:06,567 --> 00:01:07,568 Do you like me? 23 00:01:09,069 --> 00:01:11,405 I guess. Stop asking me if I like people. Everyone's fine. 24 00:01:11,489 --> 00:01:12,740 Anyway, I can't stay long. 25 00:01:12,823 --> 00:01:15,159 I have to plan a surprise party for my brother's birthday. 26 00:01:15,326 --> 00:01:16,368 Oh, my God. 27 00:01:16,452 --> 00:01:18,913 I didn't know Nico's birthday was coming up. That's so cool. 28 00:01:18,996 --> 00:01:20,289 Yeah. I always plan his party, 29 00:01:20,372 --> 00:01:22,875 and I have some really good surprises in store this time. 30 00:01:22,958 --> 00:01:24,001 It'd be really great for me 31 00:01:24,084 --> 00:01:26,545 if I could get the Catullan writers in for an exclusive event. 32 00:01:26,921 --> 00:01:29,882 Yeah, I'm sure my brother would love to have eight nerdy writers hanging around. 33 00:01:29,965 --> 00:01:31,008 No, plus-ones. 34 00:01:31,425 --> 00:01:33,511 But we are invited. 35 00:01:36,347 --> 00:01:37,473 -Sure. -(both) Yes! 36 00:01:38,140 --> 00:01:39,475 Great, they're pulling in. 37 00:01:39,642 --> 00:01:40,935 (all cheering) 38 00:01:42,895 --> 00:01:44,772 Oh, my God. It's Whitney! Hey, girl! 39 00:01:44,855 --> 00:01:45,856 (Bela) Whitney! 40 00:01:46,857 --> 00:01:47,858 You came? 41 00:01:48,150 --> 00:01:49,819 Of course we came. We love you! 42 00:01:49,985 --> 00:01:52,905 Also, we ran out of mixers. Can we have some of your team's Gatorade? 43 00:01:52,988 --> 00:01:53,989 No! 44 00:01:54,073 --> 00:01:56,784 -No worries, we'll see you inside! -Whoo! 45 00:01:56,909 --> 00:01:58,744 Go, Whitney! 46 00:01:58,828 --> 00:02:01,872 (announcer) And the score is tied 2-2 as we enter overtime. 47 00:02:03,207 --> 00:02:04,667 (cheering) 48 00:02:06,919 --> 00:02:08,212 -Es... -...sex! 49 00:02:08,295 --> 00:02:09,296 -Es... -...sex! 50 00:02:09,463 --> 00:02:10,464 -Es... -...sex! 51 00:02:10,589 --> 00:02:11,590 -Es... -...sex! 52 00:02:11,715 --> 00:02:12,716 -Es... -...sex! 53 00:02:12,800 --> 00:02:13,801 -Es... -...sex! 54 00:02:13,884 --> 00:02:15,719 (man) Let's go! 55 00:02:17,054 --> 00:02:19,181 Hey, do either of you ever get this thing 56 00:02:19,265 --> 00:02:21,058 where you feel like you have to pee but nothing comes out? 57 00:02:21,141 --> 00:02:22,393 Bitch, you have a UTI! 58 00:02:23,102 --> 00:02:24,353 Oh, my God, no. 59 00:02:24,436 --> 00:02:25,855 Did you forget to pee after sex? 60 00:02:25,938 --> 00:02:27,106 Are you supposed to do that? 61 00:02:27,189 --> 00:02:29,316 Someone didn't read the vagina's manual. 62 00:02:29,400 --> 00:02:31,777 Wait, are you having sex with someone? Who? 63 00:02:31,986 --> 00:02:36,365 Me, Kimberly Finkle, having casual sex? That's a laugh. 64 00:02:36,448 --> 00:02:37,950 There are a lot of other ways to get a UTI. 65 00:02:38,033 --> 00:02:39,994 You probably sat on a wet library chair for too long. 66 00:02:40,077 --> 00:02:41,245 Right. That's probably it. 67 00:02:41,328 --> 00:02:43,873 Anyway, these cold bleachers are really helping numb the area. 68 00:02:43,956 --> 00:02:46,500 Just a reminder, my friend Maya's visiting this week, 69 00:02:46,584 --> 00:02:49,003 so if we could talk less about infected genitals. 70 00:02:49,086 --> 00:02:50,129 No promises. 71 00:02:50,212 --> 00:02:51,714 -(crowd clamoring) -Something's happening! 72 00:02:51,797 --> 00:02:53,465 Run, bitch! Run! 73 00:02:58,470 --> 00:02:59,513 (all cheering) 74 00:03:00,890 --> 00:03:03,183 Get the goal! 75 00:03:03,267 --> 00:03:04,518 Go, Whitney, go, Whitney, go! 76 00:03:06,437 --> 00:03:07,354 (crowd groans) 77 00:03:07,938 --> 00:03:09,481 -(grunts) -(whistle blows) 78 00:03:10,316 --> 00:03:11,442 (all gasp) 79 00:03:11,984 --> 00:03:15,446 Don't take her hand, Whitney. Slap her in the fucking mouth! 80 00:03:16,447 --> 00:03:19,658 (announcer) Yellow card number 12. Penalty kick for Essex. 81 00:03:23,329 --> 00:03:24,914 Hey, no pressure, 82 00:03:25,414 --> 00:03:28,000 but if you make this shot, we go to the NCAA tournament. 83 00:03:29,418 --> 00:03:31,045 Make the damn shot. 84 00:03:31,128 --> 00:03:32,129 You got this. 85 00:03:32,504 --> 00:03:33,505 -Yes. -Yeah. 86 00:03:33,589 --> 00:03:34,590 (referee) All right, here we go. 87 00:03:34,673 --> 00:03:35,674 Ready? 88 00:03:36,258 --> 00:03:41,221 Await my fire but no one sees. 89 00:03:44,808 --> 00:03:46,560 Let's dream of something away from here 90 00:03:46,769 --> 00:03:48,437 You got this, Whitney! 91 00:03:53,317 --> 00:03:55,319 -Yeah! -Yeah! 92 00:03:55,903 --> 00:03:57,279 (announcer) The Golden Goal scored 93 00:03:57,363 --> 00:04:00,574 by number 21 Whitney Chase. Essex wins! 94 00:04:02,451 --> 00:04:03,577 (all cheering) 95 00:04:15,756 --> 00:04:18,842 ... stop until it's gone 96 00:04:21,470 --> 00:04:24,765 ... our eye on the horizon 97 00:04:28,227 --> 00:04:29,228 (clock beeps) 98 00:04:31,522 --> 00:04:32,523 It is 11:00 a.m. 99 00:04:32,606 --> 00:04:36,986 That is 100 community service hours. I am out of here. 100 00:04:37,069 --> 00:04:40,364 We knew you'd be excited, so Ginger made you cupcakes! 101 00:04:40,447 --> 00:04:44,326 They're allergen-free, but full of love and carob chips. 102 00:04:44,785 --> 00:04:45,828 Thank you. 103 00:04:45,911 --> 00:04:47,746 Do you wanna stay for the rest of today's meeting? 104 00:04:47,830 --> 00:04:49,164 Not at all, actually, but thank you. 105 00:04:49,248 --> 00:04:53,377 Alicia, Ginger, Tova, I will cherish all of the lessons you have taught me. 106 00:04:53,669 --> 00:04:56,588 And to the rest of you... I think one of you is named Rebecca. 107 00:04:56,672 --> 00:04:57,840 Oh, both of you. 108 00:04:57,923 --> 00:04:59,049 Don't forget your cupcakes. 109 00:04:59,133 --> 00:05:01,135 You know what, Ginger, I'll take one. 110 00:05:03,554 --> 00:05:05,222 I'm free, bitches! 111 00:05:05,305 --> 00:05:06,432 -Whoo! -(chuckles) 112 00:05:13,731 --> 00:05:14,648 (Bela) Wow! 113 00:05:15,774 --> 00:05:19,278 One small step for a South Asian woman, one giant leap... 114 00:05:19,361 --> 00:05:20,738 New writer alert! 115 00:05:20,821 --> 00:05:23,532 Carla? What are you doing here? Did you get tapped too? 116 00:05:23,615 --> 00:05:25,868 Yeah, I worked really flippin' hard on my submission. 117 00:05:25,951 --> 00:05:27,536 I guess they really flippin' liked it. 118 00:05:29,204 --> 00:05:30,205 Well, cool. 119 00:05:31,248 --> 00:05:32,541 So fun that you're here. 120 00:05:36,295 --> 00:05:37,296 Ladies first. 121 00:05:44,720 --> 00:05:45,971 (Bela) Holy crap! 122 00:05:46,055 --> 00:05:47,473 This is incredible! 123 00:05:49,558 --> 00:05:50,684 (Carla) Check it out. 124 00:05:51,185 --> 00:05:54,855 This is gonna be me and you one day, best friends and co-editors. 125 00:05:55,856 --> 00:05:57,399 -I'm gonna take a seat. -Me too. 126 00:05:58,609 --> 00:06:00,319 (Eric) All right. Come on, guys. Let's get started. 127 00:06:00,944 --> 00:06:03,739 First off, congratulations to our new Catullan writers. 128 00:06:03,822 --> 00:06:05,199 (all clapping softly) 129 00:06:05,282 --> 00:06:08,452 I'm sure we're witnessing the start of some very successful comedy careers. 130 00:06:08,827 --> 00:06:10,871 Until you have kids and turn into complacent hacks. 131 00:06:11,914 --> 00:06:16,043 It's a tradition for new writers to submit a piece on their first day. 132 00:06:16,126 --> 00:06:21,048 And in an age-old practice dating back to... 2013, 133 00:06:21,131 --> 00:06:23,884 the best piece will be featured on our Instagram. 134 00:06:23,967 --> 00:06:25,052 Pieces are due at midnight. 135 00:06:25,135 --> 00:06:27,096 Maybe it'd be cool if we wrote something together. 136 00:06:27,179 --> 00:06:28,180 I'm sure that's not allowed. 137 00:06:28,263 --> 00:06:31,141 Evangeline, Bela and I wanna co-write a piece. Is that cool? 138 00:06:31,225 --> 00:06:32,476 We don't have to. Really, it's-- 139 00:06:32,559 --> 00:06:36,647 Sure. Bela and Carla will be writing one together. You can work in groups. 140 00:06:36,730 --> 00:06:41,276 Shaweet! Very nice. My wife. Have you seen Borat? 141 00:06:41,360 --> 00:06:43,445 -Obviously. -I'm sure it's so good. 142 00:06:43,695 --> 00:06:46,782 Never thought that I could take these steps 143 00:06:47,407 --> 00:06:49,660 But I kept the focus on myself 144 00:06:49,785 --> 00:06:52,871 Your first UTI. I remember mine well. 145 00:06:52,955 --> 00:06:56,542 I had just conned my way into a birthright trip into Israel. 146 00:06:56,625 --> 00:06:58,585 Thanks, Lila, but I'm trying to ignore it. 147 00:06:58,669 --> 00:07:01,380 A UTI is a rite of passage. You gotta wear it like a crown. 148 00:07:01,463 --> 00:07:02,464 Right. 149 00:07:02,548 --> 00:07:04,716 An uncomfortable scratchy crown that you can't wait to take off. 150 00:07:04,800 --> 00:07:05,968 (all chuckle) 151 00:07:06,385 --> 00:07:07,970 Hey, guys, I seriously have no idea 152 00:07:08,053 --> 00:07:10,556 what to get Nico for his birthday, and I'm stressing. 153 00:07:10,639 --> 00:07:13,183 Well, I think it's pretty obvious. You gotta get him a sexy gift. 154 00:07:13,267 --> 00:07:14,893 Oh, like silky boxers? 155 00:07:14,977 --> 00:07:16,562 No. But something erotic. Like a cock ring. 156 00:07:16,645 --> 00:07:18,063 -A what? -She's wrong. 157 00:07:18,147 --> 00:07:20,691 Get Nico something nice, but slightly impersonal, 158 00:07:20,774 --> 00:07:22,067 so he doesn't think you're trying too hard. 159 00:07:22,151 --> 00:07:23,152 Maybe a nice journal? 160 00:07:23,235 --> 00:07:25,988 A journal? Hot guys don't journal. 161 00:07:26,071 --> 00:07:28,699 They just let their thoughts fade away. It's what makes them hot. 162 00:07:28,782 --> 00:07:31,410 I just wanna get him something small and meaningful, 163 00:07:31,493 --> 00:07:32,786 but something I know he'll like. 164 00:07:32,870 --> 00:07:35,914 As long as you pair it with a nasty handwritten card, something like, 165 00:07:35,998 --> 00:07:40,294 "Happy birthday, Nico. I love that thick dick. Regards, Kimberly." 166 00:07:40,377 --> 00:07:42,171 Boom. You're welcome. Shakespeare. 167 00:07:42,254 --> 00:07:44,214 Hey! So you going to this party tomorrow too? 168 00:07:44,298 --> 00:07:45,299 Yeah. Are you? 169 00:07:45,382 --> 00:07:46,383 Nah. I already have plans. 170 00:07:46,466 --> 00:07:48,760 Hanging out with Darius for a bit and then meeting up with you 171 00:07:48,844 --> 00:07:50,929 -when you leave the party early. -Oh! Hmm. 172 00:07:51,013 --> 00:07:53,432 -Sound good? -I might be available for that. 173 00:07:53,515 --> 00:07:54,516 Cool. 174 00:07:54,850 --> 00:07:56,602 So, you guys are gonna work or... 175 00:07:56,685 --> 00:07:59,438 -I am. -I'm sick. I have a UTI. 176 00:08:00,189 --> 00:08:02,024 Well, good luck with that. 177 00:08:02,107 --> 00:08:04,151 -Thank you. -Poor baby girl. Drink up. 178 00:08:05,736 --> 00:08:06,862 Hey, you wanted to see me? 179 00:08:06,945 --> 00:08:07,946 Yeah. Come on in. 180 00:08:08,197 --> 00:08:09,281 Let me guess. 181 00:08:09,364 --> 00:08:12,409 After the other night, companies are reaching out about endorsing me? 182 00:08:12,951 --> 00:08:14,077 I'll hold out for Adidas. 183 00:08:15,204 --> 00:08:19,499 Well, it has come to my attention that Coach Dalton has been having 184 00:08:19,583 --> 00:08:22,419 an inappropriate sexual relationship with a player. 185 00:08:22,502 --> 00:08:23,503 What? 186 00:08:24,087 --> 00:08:26,256 That's crazy and gross. 187 00:08:26,381 --> 00:08:30,052 Well, I have to ask. I mean, do you know anything about this or... 188 00:08:30,135 --> 00:08:32,930 Me? No. I can't even imagine it. 189 00:08:33,013 --> 00:08:35,307 -Dalton's so old, he's still on Facebook. -(chuckles) 190 00:08:35,390 --> 00:08:39,269 Okay, well, if you hear anything, let me know. 191 00:08:39,686 --> 00:08:42,397 Obviously, we have to take this very seriously. 192 00:08:42,940 --> 00:08:43,982 Of course. 193 00:08:44,358 --> 00:08:47,069 I'll think on it and let you know if anything comes to mind. 194 00:08:48,862 --> 00:08:50,948 I assume you already talked to Becky? 195 00:08:51,031 --> 00:08:54,618 I'm not implying anything, but I did see them share a PowerBar once. 196 00:08:54,701 --> 00:08:56,828 You are not the first person to mention that. 197 00:08:57,496 --> 00:08:59,790 All right. Well, that's very helpful. Thank you. 198 00:09:01,333 --> 00:09:02,376 You can go. 199 00:09:02,584 --> 00:09:03,669 Oh, all right. 200 00:09:08,548 --> 00:09:11,718 Remember to call me when you're 201 00:09:11,802 --> 00:09:13,262 (phone ringing) 202 00:09:13,595 --> 00:09:16,807 Hi, you've reached Dalton. Please leave a message and I'll call you back. 203 00:09:16,890 --> 00:09:17,933 Shit. 204 00:09:18,809 --> 00:09:21,853 ...go on and speak your truth... 205 00:09:23,063 --> 00:09:25,315 Oh, my God. I just thought about what our piece should be. 206 00:09:25,857 --> 00:09:26,858 Cool. What is it? 207 00:09:26,942 --> 00:09:31,154 What if we write a piece about what TV characters say when they orgasm? 208 00:09:31,238 --> 00:09:33,657 I don't think we want people to picture Fred Flintstone getting off. 209 00:09:34,199 --> 00:09:36,159 Right. It's cringey. I'll think of something else. 210 00:09:36,827 --> 00:09:39,788 No rush. Sometimes the best ideas take a while to find. 211 00:09:41,623 --> 00:09:44,418 You know you're like the only person at the Catullan who's nice to me. 212 00:09:44,501 --> 00:09:46,503 I'm sure that'll change with time. 213 00:09:46,586 --> 00:09:47,838 Eric's not that bad. 214 00:09:47,921 --> 00:09:50,924 Eric? The only time I've seen Eric smile was when I tripped on a cord. 215 00:09:51,008 --> 00:09:52,009 (both chuckle) 216 00:09:52,092 --> 00:09:53,260 Well, he's better than Ryan. 217 00:09:56,471 --> 00:09:58,015 Hey, I have an idea for a piece. 218 00:09:58,098 --> 00:10:01,268 What about a Tinder profile for the John Essex statue? 219 00:10:01,351 --> 00:10:03,437 Ryan showed me his dick... 220 00:10:04,771 --> 00:10:06,064 in a bad way. 221 00:10:06,940 --> 00:10:07,941 Are you serious? 222 00:10:08,358 --> 00:10:11,194 He called me into his office to talk about piece formatting, 223 00:10:11,278 --> 00:10:12,779 and then he took it out. 224 00:10:13,196 --> 00:10:16,074 And it's all I can think about whenever I'm at the Catullan. 225 00:10:16,742 --> 00:10:18,618 -Are you gonna tell anyone? -I don't know. 226 00:10:19,286 --> 00:10:21,663 Everybody already thinks I'm so weird. 227 00:10:23,999 --> 00:10:26,084 Has he ever done anything like that to you? 228 00:10:26,168 --> 00:10:27,210 Ryan? 229 00:10:28,253 --> 00:10:29,921 No. Not at all. 230 00:10:30,005 --> 00:10:31,048 Yeah. 231 00:10:32,466 --> 00:10:33,675 Forget I said anything. 232 00:10:34,176 --> 00:10:35,427 Let's write your funny idea. 233 00:10:37,220 --> 00:10:39,348 -Yeah. -Yeah. 234 00:10:43,685 --> 00:10:45,562 This is for my brother's 21st birthday. 235 00:10:45,729 --> 00:10:48,315 I will need a crepe station option that is both sweet and savory. 236 00:10:49,107 --> 00:10:52,527 But in my head, in my head 237 00:10:54,821 --> 00:10:57,491 Well, then I will await your manager's call at this number. 238 00:10:58,867 --> 00:10:59,826 Oh. 239 00:10:59,910 --> 00:11:02,579 You serving me some rich mommy party planner. 240 00:11:02,662 --> 00:11:04,289 I'm very into that. 241 00:11:05,540 --> 00:11:10,087 Hey, what is with your neighbor with the red hair? 242 00:11:10,170 --> 00:11:12,005 She was staring at me while I was waiting at the door. 243 00:11:12,089 --> 00:11:14,341 Oh, she's my best friend. I'm kidding. 244 00:11:14,424 --> 00:11:17,094 I don't talk to my neighbors. Do you think I'm insane? 245 00:11:17,594 --> 00:11:21,098 Dude, planning a party in Vermont is challenging. 246 00:11:21,181 --> 00:11:22,516 No one has taste. 247 00:11:22,599 --> 00:11:26,353 Yeah. About that, am I, like, invited to this or... 248 00:11:26,436 --> 00:11:28,397 I figured you wouldn't wanna go. 249 00:11:28,480 --> 00:11:30,649 And don't you think you coming as my plus-one 250 00:11:30,732 --> 00:11:32,484 would be like this whole thing? 251 00:11:32,567 --> 00:11:33,777 There it is. 252 00:11:34,986 --> 00:11:36,029 What? 253 00:11:36,113 --> 00:11:38,490 You don't want me there because you're worried people will figure you out. 254 00:11:38,573 --> 00:11:43,036 Hey, it is a birthday party for my brother who you have met, like, once. 255 00:11:43,328 --> 00:11:46,164 Okay, can we please not make this into a bigger thing than it has to be? 256 00:11:47,249 --> 00:11:48,250 It's not about the party. 257 00:11:49,584 --> 00:11:53,672 I just want to know that you and me can exist outside of this one room. 258 00:11:55,048 --> 00:11:57,509 -We can. -Okay. 259 00:12:01,012 --> 00:12:03,265 Cool. Well, this got weird. 260 00:12:04,307 --> 00:12:05,350 I'm gonna go. 261 00:12:08,770 --> 00:12:11,064 I'm gonna text you later, okay? 262 00:12:12,774 --> 00:12:13,775 Sure. 263 00:12:13,859 --> 00:12:20,323 You say you can't hold anything back, it's a habit 264 00:12:21,408 --> 00:12:26,204 You say what's on your mind, hmm 265 00:12:26,788 --> 00:12:32,461 Whatever's on your mind, hmm 266 00:12:32,794 --> 00:12:34,671 Willow, I am freaking out. 267 00:12:34,754 --> 00:12:37,757 Yeah, I would be too. This shit is crazy. Have you talked to Dalton? 268 00:12:37,841 --> 00:12:40,051 No, he's not answering any of my calls or texts. 269 00:12:40,135 --> 00:12:42,762 Both on my phone or on this burner I just bought. 270 00:12:42,846 --> 00:12:45,182 You bought a burner? Whitney, what the fuck? 271 00:12:45,265 --> 00:12:46,475 You're going full-blown Homeland. 272 00:12:46,558 --> 00:12:47,934 What was I supposed to do? 273 00:12:48,018 --> 00:12:49,060 I can't have this come out. 274 00:12:49,144 --> 00:12:51,813 "Black senator's daughter has inappropriate relationship with coach." 275 00:12:51,897 --> 00:12:52,898 That gets aired on Fox News. 276 00:12:52,981 --> 00:12:54,357 Okay, you're not wrong. 277 00:12:54,441 --> 00:12:57,486 Like, I would watch that. But I think you can chill. 278 00:12:57,569 --> 00:13:00,906 I talked to Coach Woods and she thinks Dalton was sleeping with Jena. 279 00:13:00,989 --> 00:13:02,616 Jena? Why would she think that? 280 00:13:02,699 --> 00:13:05,452 Because I told her I thought it was Jena. She didn't mention you once. 281 00:13:05,535 --> 00:13:06,995 Did you find out where this is coming from? 282 00:13:07,078 --> 00:13:11,041 Apparently, Dalton's wife called her when she found a box of condoms in his car. 283 00:13:11,124 --> 00:13:12,501 And a Google search on his iPad 284 00:13:12,584 --> 00:13:14,920 that said, "Is it illegal for a coach to sleep with a player?" 285 00:13:15,003 --> 00:13:16,421 God, he's such a fucking idiot. 286 00:13:16,505 --> 00:13:18,381 Well, you weren't fucking him for his amazing brain. 287 00:13:18,465 --> 00:13:22,511 But you just need to lay low, and this will blow over. 288 00:13:22,594 --> 00:13:24,179 There's nothing pointing to you. 289 00:13:25,305 --> 00:13:29,226 Wow, thank you so much for helping me with my chemistry homework! 290 00:13:29,309 --> 00:13:31,019 I understand covalent bonds now. 291 00:13:31,102 --> 00:13:33,063 -Relax. She already knows. -Oh. 292 00:13:33,146 --> 00:13:36,066 The head coach found out Dalton was sleeping with someone on the team. 293 00:13:36,483 --> 00:13:38,068 Shit. Do they know it's you? 294 00:13:38,151 --> 00:13:40,111 No, you're the only two people who do 295 00:13:40,195 --> 00:13:42,906 and I trust you both/will murder you if you say anything. 296 00:13:42,989 --> 00:13:45,283 Okay, but having witnessed some white-collar crime over the years, 297 00:13:45,367 --> 00:13:47,619 if I were you, I'd reset my phone to factory settings and wipe my hard drive. 298 00:13:47,702 --> 00:13:49,079 She doesn't need to do that. 299 00:13:49,162 --> 00:13:50,664 -I already did both. -Smart girl. 300 00:13:50,747 --> 00:13:53,542 So you rich people are just naturally good at covering shit up, aren't you? 301 00:13:53,625 --> 00:13:54,960 -Yes. -Yeah. 302 00:13:55,085 --> 00:13:57,212 Got a little bit of sunshine 303 00:13:57,295 --> 00:13:59,798 I'm not always such a downer doll 304 00:13:59,881 --> 00:14:01,633 Kinda landed in a goldmine 305 00:14:02,050 --> 00:14:04,302 Ever since I had the good times roll 306 00:14:05,220 --> 00:14:06,263 How's the studying going? 307 00:14:06,638 --> 00:14:08,181 Good. Productive. I like it. 308 00:14:11,184 --> 00:14:13,895 Have you... earned a break? 309 00:14:23,697 --> 00:14:27,450 I want you on top... 'cause my arms are kinda wrecked right now. 310 00:14:27,534 --> 00:14:29,119 (chuckles) 311 00:14:30,245 --> 00:14:31,246 Okay. 312 00:14:33,540 --> 00:14:34,833 But can I ask you something first? 313 00:14:35,500 --> 00:14:36,501 What's up? 314 00:14:37,836 --> 00:14:38,837 You play guitar. 315 00:14:38,920 --> 00:14:43,925 Hypothetically speaking, would a gift card to, like, a guitar website 316 00:14:44,009 --> 00:14:46,094 be a birthday gift you'd be excited about? 317 00:14:46,177 --> 00:14:47,304 You don't have to get me a gift. 318 00:14:47,387 --> 00:14:48,388 Are you kidding? 319 00:14:48,471 --> 00:14:50,015 Gift-giving is in the Finkle DNA. 320 00:14:50,098 --> 00:14:53,226 Did you not see my mom slinging around purse hooks at Parents Weekend? 321 00:14:53,310 --> 00:14:58,106 Your mom's cute, but seriously, you don't have to give me a gift. 322 00:15:05,280 --> 00:15:06,656 Okay, let's do it, but let's be quick, 323 00:15:06,740 --> 00:15:08,700 'cause I have a lot of work I have to catch up on. 324 00:15:08,783 --> 00:15:11,745 -Hey, Siri, set me a timer for 45 seconds. -(chuckles softly) 325 00:15:11,870 --> 00:15:12,996 I'm not 326 00:15:13,872 --> 00:15:15,415 'cause I've soul 327 00:15:16,124 --> 00:15:21,004 Where you go lie, why not just soar? 328 00:15:21,087 --> 00:15:24,633 And for a while, I'm on a roll 329 00:15:24,799 --> 00:15:28,637 Well, I'm loving those eyes, that's all I know 330 00:15:28,720 --> 00:15:29,929 Are you just now getting home? 331 00:15:31,014 --> 00:15:32,807 Wait, is this a walk of shame? 332 00:15:33,350 --> 00:15:35,185 So you are sleeping with someone? 333 00:15:35,268 --> 00:15:38,063 I mean, is it a walk of shame if I stayed up all night in the library 334 00:15:38,146 --> 00:15:40,857 hooking up with my textbook? Like... (exclaims) 335 00:15:41,650 --> 00:15:42,776 We are so different. 336 00:15:43,943 --> 00:15:45,278 Are you excited for the party tonight? 337 00:15:45,362 --> 00:15:47,155 I'm so excited, I bought a new outfit for it, 338 00:15:47,238 --> 00:15:49,866 and these footpad things that make fancy shoes more comfy. 339 00:15:51,493 --> 00:15:54,245 Okay, I'm gonna grab my towel to shower to wake myself up. 340 00:15:54,329 --> 00:15:56,748 Okay. Oh, when you go in the bathroom, 341 00:15:56,831 --> 00:15:58,708 my friend Maya is in there, the one who's visiting. 342 00:15:58,792 --> 00:16:01,670 Oh, fun. My friend Kelsey from home wants to visit at some point. 343 00:16:01,753 --> 00:16:03,296 She's, like, really into anime. 344 00:16:03,963 --> 00:16:05,757 I look forward to discussing that with her. 345 00:16:07,801 --> 00:16:09,928 -So what was your idea? -So basically there is... 346 00:16:10,011 --> 00:16:11,721 Okay, everyone, I have two announcements. 347 00:16:11,805 --> 00:16:13,014 The first is for everybody. 348 00:16:13,098 --> 00:16:15,725 -Jeff, use spell check. -Okay. 349 00:16:16,976 --> 00:16:18,687 Secondly, Carla has decided to quit. 350 00:16:18,770 --> 00:16:20,021 -What? -Yeah. 351 00:16:20,105 --> 00:16:21,231 Wait, why would she quit? 352 00:16:21,314 --> 00:16:23,191 Who knows? Unlike every other conversation 353 00:16:23,274 --> 00:16:25,193 I've ever had with her, she didn't go into detail. 354 00:16:25,318 --> 00:16:26,361 (all laugh) 355 00:16:26,444 --> 00:16:28,905 Anyway, now's the moment you've all been waiting for. 356 00:16:28,988 --> 00:16:32,117 The announcement of which new writer's piece will be featured on our Instagram. 357 00:16:32,200 --> 00:16:35,078 Which is an account followed by multiple Emmy-nominated writers. 358 00:16:35,161 --> 00:16:36,246 And the winner is... 359 00:16:36,913 --> 00:16:41,501 the John Essex Statue's Tinder Profile written by Bela Malhotra. 360 00:16:42,252 --> 00:16:44,045 -Thank you. -(all clapping) 361 00:16:44,212 --> 00:16:46,923 But I actually co-wrote that piece with Carla. 362 00:16:47,006 --> 00:16:49,634 She said in her email it was mostly you, so, enjoy that sole credit. 363 00:16:49,718 --> 00:16:51,094 All right, we're done here. Good job, guys. 364 00:16:51,261 --> 00:16:52,262 All right. 365 00:16:52,345 --> 00:16:53,346 Congrats. 366 00:16:54,222 --> 00:16:56,891 Bela, oh, my gosh. So proud of you. 367 00:16:56,975 --> 00:16:58,977 Hey, nice work. 368 00:17:06,234 --> 00:17:08,069 Holy hell! Are you Maya? 369 00:17:08,403 --> 00:17:10,155 You're gorgeous. 370 00:17:10,655 --> 00:17:12,574 I'm Kimberly. I'm one of Leighton's roommates. 371 00:17:12,657 --> 00:17:13,908 Nice to meet you, Kimberly. 372 00:17:13,992 --> 00:17:16,453 Seriously, you smell like a fancy spa. 373 00:17:16,536 --> 00:17:17,787 Sorry to double compliment. 374 00:17:17,871 --> 00:17:21,708 I didn't sleep much last night, and my brain isn't fully working yet. 375 00:17:21,791 --> 00:17:24,502 Ooh, sounds like you had a fun night. Get it, girl. 376 00:17:24,586 --> 00:17:27,589 I did get it, and then some. I have a hickey on my boob. 377 00:17:27,672 --> 00:17:29,716 My boyfriend gave me one of those when we first started dating. 378 00:17:29,799 --> 00:17:30,925 What's with these guys? 379 00:17:31,009 --> 00:17:32,886 Right? Hey, I need to go help Leighton 380 00:17:32,969 --> 00:17:35,096 set up for this party, but I'll see you there? 381 00:17:35,180 --> 00:17:36,181 Totally. 382 00:17:36,264 --> 00:17:38,933 Yeah, let me see you go to town, yeah 383 00:17:39,100 --> 00:17:41,686 Go down, go down, go down 384 00:17:41,895 --> 00:17:43,438 Yeah, yeah 385 00:17:46,483 --> 00:17:48,568 Baby, why don't we go to town? 386 00:17:51,029 --> 00:17:52,155 Yeah 387 00:17:52,238 --> 00:17:53,281 (phone chimes) 388 00:17:54,032 --> 00:17:56,117 Let me see you go to town, baby 389 00:17:56,201 --> 00:17:57,535 Go to town, yeah 390 00:17:57,619 --> 00:17:59,788 Baby, let me watch you go to town 391 00:17:59,913 --> 00:18:01,247 {\an8} If you want a chance, baby... 392 00:18:03,583 --> 00:18:05,335 Yeah, yeah 393 00:18:06,878 --> 00:18:09,672 Go down, go down, go down 394 00:18:10,298 --> 00:18:12,592 Yeah, let me see you go to town 395 00:18:13,051 --> 00:18:15,512 Go down, go down, go down 396 00:18:15,762 --> 00:18:18,306 Yeah, let me see you go to town 397 00:18:18,723 --> 00:18:21,184 Go down, go down, go down 398 00:18:21,267 --> 00:18:23,603 Yeah, let me see you go to town 399 00:18:24,979 --> 00:18:26,231 Bela - 8:52 PM 400 00:18:26,314 --> 00:18:30,109 Hey Carla. There's something I want to talk to you about. 401 00:18:30,193 --> 00:18:33,154 Go to town with it and she shaved it all off 402 00:18:33,238 --> 00:18:34,322 Charlie Brown with it 403 00:18:34,489 --> 00:18:36,574 Looking all around all the other girl sound fishy 404 00:18:37,992 --> 00:18:41,162 Hey, are you ready to black out with your rack out or whatever it is 405 00:18:41,246 --> 00:18:42,997 -you're always saying to us? -Yeah, let's do it. 406 00:18:43,081 --> 00:18:44,707 Let's crunk out with our junk out. 407 00:18:44,791 --> 00:18:45,792 Yeah! 408 00:18:46,376 --> 00:18:48,545 (Kimberly) I'm wearing underwear that's so sexy, it's insane. 409 00:18:48,628 --> 00:18:50,129 Also, it kind of hurts. 410 00:18:50,505 --> 00:18:51,631 Come on now 411 00:18:53,633 --> 00:18:55,593 Let's go, come spread the... 412 00:18:58,429 --> 00:18:59,722 ...baby I need you 413 00:18:59,806 --> 00:19:01,558 Those are a lot of gifts. 414 00:19:01,641 --> 00:19:04,853 The only thing my friends got me for my last birthday was a Chipotle gift card. 415 00:19:04,978 --> 00:19:07,313 Holy shit. Did someone buy him a snowboard? 416 00:19:07,397 --> 00:19:10,358 I got him sour candy, because I know he likes sour candy. 417 00:19:10,441 --> 00:19:11,693 That's really sweet. 418 00:19:12,694 --> 00:19:14,070 I need a drink, stat. 419 00:19:14,153 --> 00:19:16,197 Hell, yes. Let's get shots. 420 00:19:16,281 --> 00:19:18,074 I need to start with a glass of water. 421 00:19:18,157 --> 00:19:21,077 I have to take my UTI medicine and the pill is so huge. 422 00:19:22,245 --> 00:19:23,371 Hey, they just pulled up. 423 00:19:23,663 --> 00:19:24,914 Everyone, quiet. He's here. 424 00:19:24,998 --> 00:19:27,333 Okay, everyone, shut up. Be quiet. 425 00:19:28,418 --> 00:19:30,295 Come on, he's coming. Shh! 426 00:19:35,216 --> 00:19:37,760 (Nico) Are we almost there? This blindfold does not smell good. 427 00:19:41,973 --> 00:19:44,851 -(all) Surprise! -Oh, shit! 428 00:19:44,934 --> 00:19:46,269 This is amazing! 429 00:19:47,562 --> 00:19:48,938 Leighton, this is so cool of you. 430 00:19:49,063 --> 00:19:51,274 -Happy birthday, bro. -Oh, man. 431 00:19:51,357 --> 00:19:53,985 And I have one more surprise for you. 432 00:19:54,527 --> 00:19:55,570 Surprise, babe! 433 00:19:55,653 --> 00:19:57,530 Maya? You're here. 434 00:19:57,614 --> 00:20:00,658 I flew in from Barcelona for you. Happy birthday. 435 00:20:02,285 --> 00:20:03,953 (all) Ooh! 436 00:20:12,712 --> 00:20:16,007 -Kimberly, hey. -Did you guys know? 437 00:20:16,090 --> 00:20:18,509 Oh, my God. No. I would have told you. 438 00:20:18,593 --> 00:20:20,219 I didn't know either. I'm so sorry. 439 00:20:20,303 --> 00:20:22,263 Kimberly, can we talk for a minute? 440 00:20:22,347 --> 00:20:24,057 Dude, I cannot believe you. 441 00:20:24,140 --> 00:20:25,475 I'm Bela, by the way. We've met a few times. 442 00:20:25,558 --> 00:20:27,143 I enjoy your parties and hope to keep coming to them. 443 00:20:27,644 --> 00:20:29,854 But on a personal level, I think you suck. 444 00:20:29,938 --> 00:20:31,522 Yeah. You're a prep school douchebag 445 00:20:31,606 --> 00:20:33,191 who thinks he can get away with anything he wants. 446 00:20:33,274 --> 00:20:34,567 Can I talk to Kimberly alone for a minute? 447 00:20:34,651 --> 00:20:36,778 It's okay. You guys go back inside. 448 00:20:36,861 --> 00:20:38,488 We're watching you, bro. 449 00:20:38,571 --> 00:20:40,573 Sleazeball. (whispers) Thanks again for the invite. 450 00:20:41,407 --> 00:20:42,575 Sleazeball! 451 00:20:47,830 --> 00:20:49,999 -I can explain. -Nico, this is so fucked up. 452 00:20:50,083 --> 00:20:52,669 -Don't be like that. -Don't be like what? 453 00:20:52,752 --> 00:20:56,381 Heartbroken that the first guy I met in college has a secret girlfriend. 454 00:20:56,464 --> 00:20:57,674 Maya has been studying abroad. 455 00:20:57,757 --> 00:20:59,425 She wasn't even supposed to be back until January. 456 00:20:59,884 --> 00:21:02,679 So you were going to tell me, you were just going to wait several more months. 457 00:21:02,762 --> 00:21:04,681 -Cool. -Look, it got out of hand. 458 00:21:07,642 --> 00:21:08,810 I don't know what to say. 459 00:21:08,893 --> 00:21:10,561 Well, I do. Fuck you. 460 00:21:10,645 --> 00:21:12,355 I wasted two months on you. 461 00:21:12,689 --> 00:21:14,148 My grades are in the fucking trash. 462 00:21:14,232 --> 00:21:17,193 And I have a UTI and it's fucking burning down there right now. 463 00:21:17,276 --> 00:21:18,277 Okay, I'm done. 464 00:21:21,572 --> 00:21:23,533 And now I'm about to cry, too. Fuck! 465 00:21:23,658 --> 00:21:24,659 Kimberly, please. 466 00:21:26,202 --> 00:21:27,578 (music playing) 467 00:21:28,371 --> 00:21:30,164 (people chattering indistinctly) 468 00:21:36,212 --> 00:21:37,672 Are you sure you want to be here right now? 469 00:21:37,755 --> 00:21:40,299 Definitely. I want to stay here and ruin his night 470 00:21:40,383 --> 00:21:43,302 and make him think that I might say something to his actual girlfriend. 471 00:21:50,685 --> 00:21:51,686 Damn, girl. 472 00:21:53,730 --> 00:21:56,441 Okay, actually, on second thought, I think I'm gonna go. 473 00:21:56,524 --> 00:21:59,152 But I don't want to make this some big dramatic exit. 474 00:21:59,235 --> 00:22:01,320 So, please, the two of you stay. 475 00:22:14,083 --> 00:22:15,168 What the fuck? 476 00:22:38,983 --> 00:22:41,444 Do you think my boobs have gotten bigger since the beginning of college? 477 00:22:41,527 --> 00:22:42,487 They feel bigger. 478 00:22:43,029 --> 00:22:46,199 Hey, Whit. Hey, can I talk to you for a sec, in private? 479 00:22:46,365 --> 00:22:47,700 Would you mind getting us drinks? 480 00:22:47,784 --> 00:22:48,785 Gladly. 481 00:22:50,870 --> 00:22:52,121 Dude, there's trouble. 482 00:22:52,455 --> 00:22:54,707 Apparently, our bus driver told Coach Woods 483 00:22:54,791 --> 00:22:56,084 they saw Dalton kissing a player. 484 00:22:56,959 --> 00:22:57,960 Okay. 485 00:22:58,044 --> 00:23:01,380 A Black player. And we're the only two Black girls on the team. 486 00:23:01,464 --> 00:23:02,465 Fuck! 487 00:23:02,548 --> 00:23:04,717 I think you need to talk to Coach, like, now. 488 00:23:04,801 --> 00:23:06,969 Just come clean and hope for the best. 489 00:23:08,137 --> 00:23:11,641 Okay. Yeah, I got to go do this. 490 00:23:25,321 --> 00:23:26,823 Carla - 10:15 PM 491 00:23:26,906 --> 00:23:29,367 Gonna miss hanging with you, but hope you have fun! 492 00:23:29,450 --> 00:23:31,077 You've to live like this... 493 00:23:41,712 --> 00:23:42,630 One sec. 494 00:23:43,756 --> 00:23:44,924 Dude, you okay? 495 00:23:45,299 --> 00:23:46,676 Yeah. Why do you ask? 496 00:23:46,759 --> 00:23:49,387 Because you're staring at your phone like a psycho. 497 00:23:49,762 --> 00:23:52,431 Leighton, I think I fucked up and I don't know how to fix it. 498 00:23:52,932 --> 00:23:54,976 Can I interest you ladies in some shots? 499 00:23:55,059 --> 00:23:56,352 Dude, fuck off. 500 00:23:56,561 --> 00:23:57,520 What happened? 501 00:23:57,603 --> 00:23:59,397 You know that guy Ryan who showed me porn? 502 00:24:00,189 --> 00:24:01,440 He kinda got me alone the other day 503 00:24:01,524 --> 00:24:03,234 and then pushed his dick up against my back. 504 00:24:03,985 --> 00:24:04,986 Oh, my God. 505 00:24:05,069 --> 00:24:06,362 I laughed and brushed it off, 506 00:24:06,654 --> 00:24:10,116 but then I found out that he did it to this other girl, too. 507 00:24:10,199 --> 00:24:14,078 And when she told me about it, I lied to her and stayed quiet. 508 00:24:15,204 --> 00:24:17,081 And I think I silenced her. 509 00:24:21,836 --> 00:24:23,880 It's okay, okay? 510 00:24:27,049 --> 00:24:28,134 Did you just hug me? 511 00:24:28,217 --> 00:24:29,635 I already regret doing that. 512 00:24:30,178 --> 00:24:31,179 Come on, let's go. 513 00:24:31,596 --> 00:24:32,638 Come on. 514 00:24:36,809 --> 00:24:42,940 {\an8} You got another thing going thinking it's gonna be easy 515 00:24:43,149 --> 00:24:46,527 We are so high 516 00:24:47,737 --> 00:24:49,280 Where is down? 517 00:24:51,157 --> 00:24:52,158 Hi. Are you... 518 00:24:52,241 --> 00:24:54,076 Her wife? Yes, I am. 519 00:24:55,369 --> 00:24:57,121 Gert, you got a visitor. 520 00:24:59,540 --> 00:25:02,835 Coach, I promise you, it is totally over. 521 00:25:02,919 --> 00:25:04,378 We ended things weeks ago. 522 00:25:04,462 --> 00:25:06,839 So, if there's any way we could just forget about this... 523 00:25:06,923 --> 00:25:08,257 -Whitney-- -Coach, please. 524 00:25:09,383 --> 00:25:12,887 My mom is a public figure, and if this gets out... 525 00:25:15,056 --> 00:25:17,099 My stories don't go away the way other people's do. 526 00:25:17,183 --> 00:25:19,310 Chase, I already gave my statement. 527 00:25:20,228 --> 00:25:21,229 All right? 528 00:25:22,521 --> 00:25:23,940 I told them I couldn't give a name. 529 00:25:24,232 --> 00:25:25,524 It's none of their business. 530 00:25:26,317 --> 00:25:27,526 You're 18. 531 00:25:27,902 --> 00:25:30,529 You don't need this following you around for the rest of your life. 532 00:25:30,613 --> 00:25:31,739 Thank you. 533 00:25:33,157 --> 00:25:34,492 Thank you so much. 534 00:25:44,502 --> 00:25:47,797 Canaan, we're leaving. Are you coming with or not? 535 00:25:49,382 --> 00:25:50,633 Yeah, let's go. 536 00:25:52,426 --> 00:25:54,428 You really gotta cut down on your screen time though, 537 00:25:54,512 --> 00:25:57,473 'cause you're literally always on that thing, which is kinda sick. 538 00:26:02,937 --> 00:26:04,814 -Hey. -Thank you for coming. 539 00:26:05,022 --> 00:26:06,691 Yeah, of course. 540 00:26:13,906 --> 00:26:18,661 Hey, guys, my name is Alicia, and I know that this is very scary, 541 00:26:18,744 --> 00:26:21,330 but you're totally safe here. 542 00:26:21,831 --> 00:26:25,710 No matter what you say, I'm your ally, okay? 543 00:26:26,460 --> 00:26:27,461 I'm your ally. 544 00:26:32,425 --> 00:26:34,218 So they say... 545 00:26:34,802 --> 00:26:36,637 They say your name 546 00:26:43,185 --> 00:26:44,478 {\an8} ... it's a shame 547 00:26:50,318 --> 00:26:53,821 The hail turned to rain 548 00:26:54,363 --> 00:26:56,824 {\an8} Ain't coming down 549 00:27:00,995 --> 00:27:03,205 And as far as we go... 550 00:27:03,331 --> 00:27:04,373 Hey, Whit. 551 00:27:09,086 --> 00:27:11,088 All right, ladies. Gather up. 552 00:27:11,922 --> 00:27:14,091 I'm Coach Hansen, the women's ice hockey coach. 553 00:27:14,175 --> 00:27:15,676 Now, I can't go into details, 554 00:27:15,760 --> 00:27:17,970 but Coach Woods and Coach Dalton have been dismissed. 555 00:27:18,054 --> 00:27:19,430 -What? -I'll be leading you through 556 00:27:19,513 --> 00:27:20,514 the rest of the tournament. 557 00:27:20,598 --> 00:27:23,893 Now can someone explain to me how off-sides works in soccer? 558 00:27:27,521 --> 00:27:28,522 Anyone? 559 00:27:28,647 --> 00:27:30,066 Her heart is beating 560 00:27:30,441 --> 00:27:32,401 Through her chest 561 00:27:32,526 --> 00:27:36,238 Hesitate to pull the trigger she wants to 562 00:27:36,822 --> 00:27:38,074 Like a bullet 563 00:27:38,491 --> 00:27:40,826 Through the shadows 564 00:27:40,910 --> 00:27:44,538 Contemplating the sense of what's right or wrong 565 00:27:44,622 --> 00:27:47,249 She never got to tell you that 566 00:27:47,333 --> 00:27:48,918 And said she was in chains 567 00:27:49,001 --> 00:27:52,088 She never acted like it's all in vain 568 00:27:52,922 --> 00:27:57,176 And everybody else is only playing by the rules 569 00:27:57,551 --> 00:28:00,179 She always wanted to keep the cool 570 00:28:01,389 --> 00:28:04,308 She always wanted to keep the cool 571 00:28:13,317 --> 00:28:15,111 She is burning 572 00:28:21,784 --> 00:28:24,078 Through the shame 573 00:28:29,959 --> 00:28:31,710 She's dying 574 00:28:32,169 --> 00:28:33,379 She's dying 575 00:28:38,509 --> 00:28:40,261 Through the shadow 576 00:28:40,719 --> 00:28:42,096 Through the shadow.