1 00:00:12,138 --> 00:00:15,850 -You fucking cheated? -But you're, like, a nerd. 2 00:00:15,933 --> 00:00:16,976 I don't know, guys. Is she? 3 00:00:17,226 --> 00:00:20,187 She's cheating on tests, trying to bang a dude on a teacher's desk. 4 00:00:20,271 --> 00:00:22,398 -True. -I think she's, like, a bad girl. 5 00:00:22,565 --> 00:00:24,942 Well, now I have a meeting with President Lacey and the Honor Board 6 00:00:25,025 --> 00:00:27,069 to plead my case so that they don't expel me. 7 00:00:27,737 --> 00:00:29,697 Damn, girl. Your life's a fucking mess right now. 8 00:00:29,780 --> 00:00:31,407 -Bela. -No, she's right. It is. 9 00:00:31,532 --> 00:00:34,910 Well, it is all gonna work itself out, okay? And if it doesn't... 10 00:00:38,748 --> 00:00:40,958 -Then what? -I don't know, okay? 11 00:00:41,083 --> 00:00:43,210 I thought you guys would jump in with something encouraging-- 12 00:00:43,294 --> 00:00:44,211 -Oh, my God. -Okay. 13 00:00:44,378 --> 00:00:46,380 Okay. Let's focus on the positives, right? 14 00:00:46,464 --> 00:00:47,923 Uh, midterms are over, 15 00:00:48,048 --> 00:00:51,218 and tonight we're gonna rage our brains out at the Anything But Clothes party. 16 00:00:51,343 --> 00:00:53,220 Yes. Yes. 17 00:00:53,304 --> 00:00:56,432 I, for one, will be making a tasteful but extremely revealing mini dress 18 00:00:56,515 --> 00:01:00,019 made out of caution tape, and caution, I will be showing some ass meat. 19 00:01:00,686 --> 00:01:02,730 Can you please not say ass meat while we are eating? 20 00:01:02,813 --> 00:01:03,939 Leighton, you're so repressed. 21 00:01:04,023 --> 00:01:08,319 Table poll. Is the phrase "ass meat" repulsive or charming? 22 00:01:09,612 --> 00:01:10,821 -I don't like it. -It's not great, Bela. 23 00:01:11,071 --> 00:01:13,157 -Thank you. -Okay. Well, here comes Nico. 24 00:01:13,491 --> 00:01:15,993 -I'll ask him. -Damn, he looks kind of mad. 25 00:01:16,494 --> 00:01:18,537 Leighton, I need to talk to you. 26 00:01:18,621 --> 00:01:21,624 -I'm kind of busy right now. Can it wait? -No, it can't. Let's go. 27 00:01:23,626 --> 00:01:24,585 Excuse me. 28 00:01:32,051 --> 00:01:34,678 -I mean, we're gonna go eavesdrop, right? -Yeah. One hundred. 29 00:01:45,397 --> 00:01:47,316 You had no right to say anything to Maya. 30 00:01:47,399 --> 00:01:50,569 You were cheating on two of my friends. I am not the one who is in the wrong here. 31 00:01:50,694 --> 00:01:52,238 I just don't understand why you would do this to me. 32 00:01:52,363 --> 00:01:56,033 Oh, please. No one did anything to you. You did this to yourself. 33 00:01:56,116 --> 00:01:57,409 I just put a stop to it. 34 00:01:57,535 --> 00:01:59,453 I just hate thinking that they're fighting about me. 35 00:01:59,537 --> 00:02:00,913 I don't think this is all about you. 36 00:02:00,996 --> 00:02:03,791 Because you fucked Kimberly, that's why. 37 00:02:03,874 --> 00:02:05,668 I mean, a good amount is about you. Sure. 38 00:02:05,751 --> 00:02:07,002 What would you know about this, anyway? 39 00:02:07,253 --> 00:02:09,964 You've literally never dated anyone seriously in your entire life. 40 00:02:10,339 --> 00:02:13,342 You were all about Cory, and then you go on one date with him and you ghost him. 41 00:02:13,592 --> 00:02:15,219 Uh, because he was boring. 42 00:02:15,594 --> 00:02:18,055 Have you seen his Instagram? It's all sunsets. 43 00:02:19,723 --> 00:02:21,767 Do you think they stopped? I can't hear anything anymore. 44 00:02:21,892 --> 00:02:22,810 It's so quiet. 45 00:02:24,270 --> 00:02:25,145 We just got here. 46 00:02:25,229 --> 00:02:27,106 I'm so sorry my hand grazed whatever it grazed. 47 00:02:29,859 --> 00:02:33,988 -Did you guys hear all that? -No, no. The doors are very thick. 48 00:02:34,280 --> 00:02:36,031 They're lying. I heard it from the bathroom. 49 00:02:45,332 --> 00:02:46,709 - Eric? - Up here. 50 00:02:48,419 --> 00:02:51,088 -You sure you wanna be here for this? -Yeah, I am. 51 00:02:55,384 --> 00:02:57,595 Uh... What's going on? 52 00:02:58,095 --> 00:03:00,389 -We know what you did to Bela. -And to Carla. 53 00:03:01,765 --> 00:03:04,310 Okay. Well, I don't know what you're talking about. 54 00:03:05,519 --> 00:03:07,730 -I didn't do anything. -Yes, you did. 55 00:03:08,397 --> 00:03:10,691 You assaulted both of us, and you know it. 56 00:03:11,066 --> 00:03:12,860 Look, you can deny it all you want, 57 00:03:13,193 --> 00:03:15,529 but we believe them and we made our decision. 58 00:03:16,113 --> 00:03:17,072 We're kicking you out. 59 00:03:18,365 --> 00:03:19,867 Wait. Can we slow down for a second? 60 00:03:21,160 --> 00:03:22,828 You're really gonna take her word over mine? 61 00:03:24,038 --> 00:03:27,499 -The girl who gave eight hand jobs? -Um, it was six hand jobs. 62 00:03:27,791 --> 00:03:29,627 And who cares how many fucking hand jobs she gave? 63 00:03:29,710 --> 00:03:31,420 It doesn't make her any less credible, you shit. 64 00:03:31,503 --> 00:03:32,755 Dude, you know I wouldn't do this. 65 00:03:32,838 --> 00:03:34,506 So two different women are just saying this 66 00:03:34,590 --> 00:03:36,091 to take you down for no reason? 67 00:03:36,216 --> 00:03:37,343 It doesn't make any sense. 68 00:03:37,426 --> 00:03:39,053 And we're not gonna ignore that. It's done. 69 00:03:39,136 --> 00:03:40,179 You can't just kick me out. 70 00:03:40,888 --> 00:03:42,473 -I'm a co-editor. -Oh, really? 71 00:03:47,978 --> 00:03:48,896 Looks like you're not anymore. 72 00:04:09,667 --> 00:04:14,213 -Now I see why you invited me over. -I'm using you for your body. 73 00:04:14,505 --> 00:04:15,631 -Mm-hmm? -Mm. 74 00:04:17,299 --> 00:04:18,300 What are you gonna do about it? 75 00:04:19,343 --> 00:04:21,261 I'm gonna go willingly. That's what I'm gonna do. 76 00:04:23,639 --> 00:04:25,557 I'm taking my shirt off. 77 00:04:25,641 --> 00:04:27,059 Uh... Sorry. 78 00:04:27,142 --> 00:04:29,895 It's just weird doing this in Kimberly's room. 79 00:04:30,354 --> 00:04:32,773 -Is that her big-ass bra behind you? -You could just ignore it... 80 00:04:33,482 --> 00:04:34,483 Mm-hmm? 81 00:04:34,566 --> 00:04:35,484 ...and look at my bra. 82 00:04:36,026 --> 00:04:39,989 Yes. It is a very, very good bra. 83 00:04:40,364 --> 00:04:41,532 Mm-hmm. 84 00:04:41,824 --> 00:04:43,659 -Should I take it off? -Mm-hmm. 85 00:04:44,410 --> 00:04:47,955 -Okay. Oh, my God, dude. -I'm sorry. I'm sorry. It's just weird. 86 00:04:48,080 --> 00:04:50,499 It's weird having sex in your coworker's room. 87 00:04:50,833 --> 00:04:53,794 Her stuffed panda is staring at me. 88 00:04:53,877 --> 00:04:56,714 -That's Penny. -Don't tell me Penny's name. 89 00:05:02,136 --> 00:05:05,055 Whitney? Whitney, are you in there? 90 00:05:05,222 --> 00:05:06,557 -Oh, my God. -What? 91 00:05:06,765 --> 00:05:07,766 My mom is here. 92 00:05:07,933 --> 00:05:09,727 -What? Oh! -My mom is at the fucking door. 93 00:05:09,810 --> 00:05:11,520 -Put your fucking shirt on. -Okay. 94 00:05:11,937 --> 00:05:14,523 -Don't got to throw it. -Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck. 95 00:05:14,940 --> 00:05:15,858 Fuck. 96 00:05:17,067 --> 00:05:19,319 Mom, what are you doing here? I thought you were on your book tour. 97 00:05:19,570 --> 00:05:23,657 I am. But I thought I'd make an extra stop over here to ask you about this. 98 00:05:25,576 --> 00:05:29,538 Okay. I just finished installing your antivirus software. Uh, all done. 99 00:05:29,663 --> 00:05:30,622 You put your shirt on backwards. 100 00:05:32,249 --> 00:05:35,753 -I-- -Mom, this is Canaan. He's-- Okay. 101 00:05:36,336 --> 00:05:38,338 -I'm gonna see you later. -Yep. 102 00:05:42,259 --> 00:05:43,969 Kimmy-bean. Perfect timing. 103 00:05:44,053 --> 00:05:46,388 Look who's at the store. It's your third-grade teacher, Mrs. Jarvis. 104 00:05:47,097 --> 00:05:50,142 -Hi, Mrs. Jarvis. -I can't see her. 105 00:05:52,144 --> 00:05:55,439 Aisle four. She's got a real deep cough. Very, very wet. 106 00:05:55,814 --> 00:05:59,068 -Dad, I need to talk to you. -Oh. Is everything okay? 107 00:05:59,902 --> 00:06:01,445 I kind of did something bad. 108 00:06:01,528 --> 00:06:03,197 Kimberly, whatever it is, you can tell me. 109 00:06:03,447 --> 00:06:05,783 There's nothing you could say that would make me disappointed in you. 110 00:06:06,742 --> 00:06:11,288 I cheated on a test and I got caught, and now I might get expelled. 111 00:06:11,622 --> 00:06:13,916 -Oh, Jesus fucking Christ. -Dad, I'm so sorry. 112 00:06:14,166 --> 00:06:17,211 I know I messed up. Just please don't be mad at me. 113 00:06:17,294 --> 00:06:20,005 Of course I'm mad. What the hell, Kimmy? This isn't like you. 114 00:06:20,089 --> 00:06:21,715 -I know. -What were you thinking? 115 00:06:21,882 --> 00:06:24,384 I wasn't. That's the problem. I'm so stupid. 116 00:06:24,927 --> 00:06:27,346 -I don't know how to tell Mom. -Oh, God. Don't do that. 117 00:06:28,138 --> 00:06:30,808 We can just keep this between us. She will lose her shit. 118 00:06:30,974 --> 00:06:32,976 Kimmy, it's okay to not be perfect for once. 119 00:06:33,060 --> 00:06:33,977 Lord knows I'm not perfect. 120 00:06:34,144 --> 00:06:37,648 Remember when I left Grandpa's ashes on the roof of the car and drove away? 121 00:06:39,775 --> 00:06:41,735 -I love you, Dad. -I love you, too. 122 00:06:41,819 --> 00:06:43,821 But you got to find a way to fix this. 123 00:06:46,031 --> 00:06:46,949 We'll see. 124 00:06:56,542 --> 00:06:58,752 Mom, why are you just showing up like this? 125 00:06:58,836 --> 00:06:59,711 You could have called. 126 00:06:59,795 --> 00:07:01,171 And you could have called me to tell me 127 00:07:01,255 --> 00:07:04,007 your team was involved in a full-blown sex scandal. 128 00:07:04,091 --> 00:07:07,052 Little suspicious I had to hear about it from Carl instead of you. 129 00:07:07,136 --> 00:07:08,428 Carl, what the hell? 130 00:07:08,512 --> 00:07:11,223 Okay. Yeah, well, Mom, you're wasting your time. 131 00:07:11,431 --> 00:07:13,809 -Everything's fine. -Everything is not fine. 132 00:07:14,184 --> 00:07:18,021 -One of the coaches was molesting a girl. -Oh, my God. No one was being molested. 133 00:07:21,358 --> 00:07:26,196 I'm just saying they were both adults. And it's over. He's fired. He's gone. 134 00:07:28,615 --> 00:07:32,536 Whitney, I cannot believe I'm going to ask you this, 135 00:07:33,662 --> 00:07:38,834 but since you don't tell me anything about your life, is it you? 136 00:07:40,294 --> 00:07:42,129 -No. -Well, then who was it? 137 00:07:42,462 --> 00:07:44,089 I need to make sure she's okay. 138 00:07:46,258 --> 00:07:47,426 You told her what? 139 00:07:51,847 --> 00:07:53,557 We're all running 140 00:07:54,725 --> 00:07:58,103 As fast as we can To the finish line 141 00:07:58,270 --> 00:08:01,732 But what do we get when it's over 142 00:08:03,066 --> 00:08:06,695 {\an8} Does winning even matter in the end 143 00:08:06,862 --> 00:08:08,989 {\an8} If it's over 144 00:08:09,698 --> 00:08:13,035 I'm done chasing tomorrow down 145 00:08:14,870 --> 00:08:18,749 Jeff, for the last time, pieces about your cousin are not funny. 146 00:08:18,874 --> 00:08:21,752 -Nobody knows who Emma is. -She's, like, crazy into horses. 147 00:08:22,085 --> 00:08:24,671 -There might be something there. -There's nothing there. 148 00:08:25,422 --> 00:08:27,007 Bela, your piece about Frankenstein 149 00:08:27,090 --> 00:08:29,718 being Jewish and going on birthright is pretty solid. Good work. 150 00:08:30,260 --> 00:08:32,471 Everyone else, please make sure you send in two more ideas by tomorrow 151 00:08:32,763 --> 00:08:35,474 and also be sure to CC our new co-editor, Evangeline. 152 00:08:35,807 --> 00:08:40,562 Uh, hello. You forgot to mention the first female co-editor in Catullan history. 153 00:08:40,938 --> 00:08:41,980 Come on, guys. 154 00:08:42,814 --> 00:08:44,024 Attagirl. 155 00:08:44,566 --> 00:08:46,109 Hey, I just wanna say, 156 00:08:46,235 --> 00:08:49,446 I think the way things went down with Ryan was kind of fucked up. 157 00:08:49,529 --> 00:08:51,323 And to be honest, some other people do, too. 158 00:08:51,406 --> 00:08:54,451 If you wanna defend a predator, maybe you should leave too. 159 00:08:54,534 --> 00:08:56,495 Whoa, whoa. I don't think we need to kick any more people out. 160 00:08:56,745 --> 00:08:58,997 It was Ryan's word against someone else's. 161 00:08:59,164 --> 00:09:00,832 Ryan's word didn't make any fucking sense. 162 00:09:00,916 --> 00:09:02,334 You have no idea what you're talking about. 163 00:09:02,417 --> 00:09:03,877 Says the girl who benefited from his exit. 164 00:09:04,002 --> 00:09:05,128 Are you fucking kidding me? 165 00:09:05,212 --> 00:09:07,130 All right, everyone, if we could calm down and get back to the meeting. 166 00:09:07,214 --> 00:09:10,008 -Actually, I'm gonna go. -You should stay. He should go. 167 00:09:10,092 --> 00:09:14,263 No, I wanna go. I came to Essex because of the Catullan. 168 00:09:15,097 --> 00:09:18,642 But I think it might suck. In two months, I've been called a slut, 169 00:09:18,767 --> 00:09:22,145 I've been hate-crimed by an alum, had some dude's dick jammed into my back. 170 00:09:22,562 --> 00:09:25,774 If this is what being on the Catullan is like, I'm sorry, I'm good without it. 171 00:09:25,857 --> 00:09:28,443 Baby, give me all you got 172 00:09:28,652 --> 00:09:30,028 Mmm 173 00:09:30,153 --> 00:09:33,448 And love'll make you fall to your knees and 174 00:09:33,532 --> 00:09:35,325 You'll fall again 175 00:09:35,409 --> 00:09:37,619 I don't really know where I'm going 176 00:09:37,995 --> 00:09:40,789 I've decided what I'm gonna tell the Disciplinary Committee. 177 00:09:40,998 --> 00:09:43,375 I'm gonna present them with a compelling, thoughtful, 178 00:09:43,458 --> 00:09:45,877 at times humorous statement on who I am 179 00:09:46,336 --> 00:09:48,588 and how I plan to learn from this experience. 180 00:09:48,714 --> 00:09:51,508 Bitch, I'm asleep. You can't go in there empty-handed. 181 00:09:51,591 --> 00:09:54,136 If you want them to go easy on you, you have to bring them something. 182 00:09:54,428 --> 00:09:56,430 -Like treats? -Like evidence, honey. 183 00:09:57,014 --> 00:09:58,515 -You stole that test from Theta, right? -Mm-hmm. 184 00:09:58,974 --> 00:10:01,059 Well, don't you think that the Honor Board would like to know 185 00:10:01,143 --> 00:10:04,229 about the large-scale cheating ring that's infecting their beloved university? 186 00:10:04,563 --> 00:10:07,941 -You think I should tattle? -Hell, yeah. It's them or you. 187 00:10:10,902 --> 00:10:14,114 -So Willow's gonna pretend to be straight? -Mm-hmm. 188 00:10:14,406 --> 00:10:15,532 Yeah, that's not gonna work. 189 00:10:15,615 --> 00:10:18,076 Hey, do any of you want my outfit for the Anything But Clothes party? 190 00:10:18,452 --> 00:10:19,828 -I'm not going. -What? 191 00:10:20,287 --> 00:10:21,621 You're not going to the party with us? 192 00:10:21,830 --> 00:10:24,583 You made Whitney go to the Caribbean night party when she had mono. 193 00:10:24,666 --> 00:10:27,711 -I had fluid in my lungs. -Bela, you have to go. We're all going. 194 00:10:27,919 --> 00:10:31,381 I can't. My soul is crushed. My comedy dreams are over. 195 00:10:31,548 --> 00:10:33,050 I guess now I'll just have to become a lame scientist 196 00:10:33,133 --> 00:10:34,301 who cures IBS or some shit. 197 00:10:34,384 --> 00:10:37,304 -You're fucking going. -Dude, it's just a party. 198 00:10:38,138 --> 00:10:39,097 It's not. 199 00:10:40,265 --> 00:10:42,017 I'm gonna steal the tests from Theta's closet 200 00:10:42,100 --> 00:10:43,852 and turn them over to the Disciplinary Committee. 201 00:10:43,935 --> 00:10:44,770 Holy shit. 202 00:10:44,853 --> 00:10:47,022 What? White collar criminals do this stuff all the time. 203 00:10:47,230 --> 00:10:50,317 Having grown up on the Upper East Side, I can confirm that is absolutely true. 204 00:10:50,859 --> 00:10:54,404 Look, I'm just freaking out, and I really want you guys to be there. 205 00:10:55,489 --> 00:10:59,618 All right. I'm in. I can't miss this shit. Let's go steal some test-- 206 00:11:00,660 --> 00:11:02,788 So which one of you guys wants to wrap this around my ass? 207 00:11:04,373 --> 00:11:06,875 -Nobody does. Stop. -She would love to do it. 208 00:11:14,341 --> 00:11:17,469 The next thing I knew, we were kissing in his truck. 209 00:11:18,095 --> 00:11:20,472 And not just kissing. Hand stuff, too. 210 00:11:21,640 --> 00:11:22,599 Ugh. 211 00:11:23,433 --> 00:11:26,353 You don't have to reveal any more than you want to. 212 00:11:26,478 --> 00:11:29,523 No. I think it's important that we all hear this. 213 00:11:30,607 --> 00:11:32,150 -He took my flower. -Wow. Okay. 214 00:11:32,234 --> 00:11:33,777 This is getting really personal. 215 00:11:34,194 --> 00:11:36,655 She's right. I don't want to overstep boundaries. 216 00:11:37,030 --> 00:11:39,825 But if you need anything, you let me know. 217 00:11:39,908 --> 00:11:44,037 All I need is to heal, but I'm on my way. 218 00:11:44,538 --> 00:11:48,417 Senator Chase. Hi. Could I please get a photo with you? 219 00:11:48,792 --> 00:11:50,419 Of course. Carl? 220 00:11:50,669 --> 00:11:51,962 -That's your mom? -Yeah. 221 00:11:53,046 --> 00:11:54,714 Carl, take a photo and use that good angle. 222 00:11:54,798 --> 00:11:55,799 He took your flower? 223 00:11:55,924 --> 00:11:58,510 I know. I'm deeply good at this. Should I do drama? 224 00:11:59,136 --> 00:12:02,431 You are shockingly great at this. And I appreciate you doing it. 225 00:12:02,639 --> 00:12:03,890 Oh, I'm just getting started. 226 00:12:03,974 --> 00:12:06,726 When your mama come back, I'm gonna make myself cry. 227 00:12:09,855 --> 00:12:11,189 Cheers. 228 00:12:13,483 --> 00:12:15,026 Bela, what was that? 229 00:12:15,402 --> 00:12:17,237 It's carrot cake schnapps. It was on clearance. 230 00:12:17,946 --> 00:12:19,114 Yeah, 'cause it tastes like shit. 231 00:12:19,531 --> 00:12:20,657 -I kind of liked it. -Right? 232 00:12:20,991 --> 00:12:22,367 I can't get the taste out of my mouth. 233 00:12:51,688 --> 00:12:54,733 Another classic I'm feeling fucking fantastic 234 00:12:54,858 --> 00:12:56,526 Normally wanna stay humble 235 00:12:56,735 --> 00:12:58,570 But y'all know for real I be mad, kid 236 00:12:58,862 --> 00:13:01,615 Hell, yes. We're gonna see some side dick tonight. 237 00:13:01,740 --> 00:13:03,366 I hope my mom doesn't show up. 238 00:13:03,533 --> 00:13:05,744 So she really bought that Willow is hooking up with him? 239 00:13:05,869 --> 00:13:07,162 I almost believed it. 240 00:13:07,287 --> 00:13:09,372 -Hello, bitches. -What? 241 00:13:09,456 --> 00:13:11,958 -Oh, my God. -Lila, that outfit is awesome. 242 00:13:12,083 --> 00:13:14,544 Thanks. It's 320 condoms from the student center, 243 00:13:14,628 --> 00:13:16,379 and I plan on using all of them tonight. 244 00:13:16,463 --> 00:13:18,590 Starting with you. Hello, sir. 245 00:13:19,799 --> 00:13:22,761 All the rumors that you heard about me are true 246 00:13:22,928 --> 00:13:26,473 I'm the best, best That you ever had in the crew 247 00:13:26,723 --> 00:13:29,017 Wanna get two shots each, pretend they're for friends? 248 00:13:29,434 --> 00:13:30,769 -Yes. -Boy. 249 00:13:31,353 --> 00:13:33,730 -Excuse me? Uh, hi. -What? 250 00:13:33,939 --> 00:13:39,486 Uh... Sorry if this feels creepy, um, but I've been watching you all night. 251 00:13:39,945 --> 00:13:41,530 I've been here for, like, six minutes. 252 00:13:41,655 --> 00:13:43,949 And those have been the best six minutes of my life. 253 00:13:44,032 --> 00:13:48,328 Look, you're really charming and all of this is very impressive. 254 00:13:48,411 --> 00:13:51,331 -I'm just not interested tonight. -Fair enough. 255 00:13:54,125 --> 00:13:56,962 Girl, if you say no to that, what the hell do you say yes to? 256 00:13:57,587 --> 00:13:58,964 He had, like, an eight-pack. 257 00:13:59,047 --> 00:14:00,924 -Okay. All right. Thank you. -You know me and abs. 258 00:14:01,049 --> 00:14:02,175 Thank you. 259 00:14:02,717 --> 00:14:05,929 Should we talk about your humiliating introduction to my mom? 260 00:14:06,054 --> 00:14:10,475 No. No. Let's actually never talk about that again, actually, ever. 261 00:14:10,934 --> 00:14:14,896 -Yeah. She is way too much. Sorry. -Doesn't seem like too much to me. 262 00:14:14,980 --> 00:14:16,898 She left her book tour to make sure you're okay. 263 00:14:17,148 --> 00:14:18,817 She obviously cares about you a lot. 264 00:14:22,654 --> 00:14:25,407 -Not to dampen the mood or anything-- -Yeah, yeah, yeah. We're gonna party. 265 00:14:26,700 --> 00:14:28,368 Hey, Bela, can we talk to you? 266 00:14:28,618 --> 00:14:32,455 Uh... Yeah. Is everything okay? How was the rest of the Catullan meeting? 267 00:14:32,539 --> 00:14:36,418 -It sort of ended right after you left. -So was everyone mad at me? 268 00:14:36,543 --> 00:14:41,798 Actually, after you quit, Jo and I started talking and we quit too. 269 00:14:41,923 --> 00:14:43,258 -Are you for real? -Yep. 270 00:14:43,592 --> 00:14:45,343 You were right. That place is awful. 271 00:14:45,427 --> 00:14:46,595 I give it two weeks 272 00:14:46,678 --> 00:14:50,140 before Jeff has a nervous breakdown and moves home to Connecticut. 273 00:14:50,223 --> 00:14:53,310 And how the fuck did it take till now for them to have a female editor? 274 00:14:53,435 --> 00:14:55,478 Yeah. So that's what we wanted to talk to you about. 275 00:14:56,229 --> 00:14:58,565 We wanted to start a new comedy thing with you. 276 00:14:58,857 --> 00:15:00,525 -Ladies only. -What do you think? 277 00:15:02,819 --> 00:15:04,738 Yes. Hell, yeah. 278 00:15:05,780 --> 00:15:06,990 -Yes. -Yes. 279 00:15:10,577 --> 00:15:13,079 I kind of wanna do it but I also don't wanna get in trouble. 280 00:15:13,204 --> 00:15:14,623 Okay. If you wanna do it, you gotta do it now. 281 00:15:14,706 --> 00:15:16,166 He's not looking. He's distracted. 282 00:15:17,167 --> 00:15:18,627 -Okay. Let's go. -Come on. 283 00:15:31,097 --> 00:15:32,140 Okay. Hurry up. 284 00:15:32,432 --> 00:15:34,476 It's a party. There's, like, a million people around. 285 00:15:34,643 --> 00:15:36,269 I've never done this before. I'm not Tom Cruise. 286 00:15:37,937 --> 00:15:39,564 -Here they are. -Okay. Take it. Let's go. 287 00:15:41,483 --> 00:15:44,319 Holy shit. Is that why you wore that bag? 288 00:15:44,569 --> 00:15:46,363 -Your girl knows how to scheme. -Okay. 289 00:15:48,907 --> 00:15:49,783 Shit. 290 00:15:52,952 --> 00:15:53,870 What the fuck? 291 00:15:56,665 --> 00:15:58,958 -What are you doing? -What does it look like? 292 00:16:00,752 --> 00:16:02,962 I'm gonna leave you both to it. 293 00:16:07,342 --> 00:16:08,551 Are you doing this 'cause you're mad at me? 294 00:16:08,885 --> 00:16:11,137 -I got caught cheating with one of these. -For real? 295 00:16:12,555 --> 00:16:14,516 -Oh, shit. -Yeah, it's not great. 296 00:16:15,058 --> 00:16:18,311 So I was gonna hand these in and try and save myself. 297 00:16:21,731 --> 00:16:24,359 -You should. -Seriously? 298 00:16:24,609 --> 00:16:26,820 If it helps you not get expelled then it's worth it. 299 00:16:28,363 --> 00:16:29,239 Thanks. 300 00:16:32,867 --> 00:16:34,911 I could also use some duct tape. 301 00:16:37,122 --> 00:16:39,249 So he just let you take the tests? 302 00:16:39,416 --> 00:16:40,959 -Yeah. -That's so cool. 303 00:16:41,334 --> 00:16:43,378 Yeah. That is surprisingly cool of him. 304 00:16:43,837 --> 00:16:46,631 Oh, my God. That's Eric. He really stood up for me today. 305 00:16:46,798 --> 00:16:50,301 Wait a minute. Eric. Eric. 306 00:16:51,636 --> 00:16:54,264 -Bela? What are you wearing? -Oh, it's caution tape. 307 00:16:54,889 --> 00:16:56,683 Yeah, I can see that. 308 00:16:57,058 --> 00:16:59,602 -So how's it going? -Bad. 309 00:16:59,894 --> 00:17:02,313 I had to irrevocably end my relationship with my best friend, 310 00:17:02,439 --> 00:17:05,316 and I have to move out of my apartment because it's his, 311 00:17:06,192 --> 00:17:07,193 and we lost all our good writers. 312 00:17:07,694 --> 00:17:11,030 -So not the best day. -Right. That makes sense. 313 00:17:11,948 --> 00:17:13,408 -Where are you gonna live? -I don't know. 314 00:17:13,491 --> 00:17:15,577 -I gotta ask my dads for rent money. -Dads? 315 00:17:15,744 --> 00:17:17,162 Yeah. I have two dads. 316 00:17:17,412 --> 00:17:19,539 -Oh, that's fun. -You think it's fun that I have two dads? 317 00:17:19,622 --> 00:17:22,667 -I do. -Yeah, I guess it's kind of fun. 318 00:17:23,668 --> 00:17:25,295 I should go. My friends are waiting for me. 319 00:17:25,378 --> 00:17:26,629 But maybe I'll see you around? 320 00:17:27,297 --> 00:17:28,423 -Yeah. -All right. 321 00:17:30,425 --> 00:17:32,051 Damn, I'm freezing my ass off. 322 00:17:47,442 --> 00:17:49,110 -Hey. -Hey. 323 00:17:49,861 --> 00:17:51,362 I'm sorry to show up unannounced. 324 00:17:53,990 --> 00:17:56,868 -Uh, can I come in? -I don't think that's a good idea. 325 00:17:57,702 --> 00:18:00,705 -Why? Is someone else here? -No. 326 00:18:01,164 --> 00:18:04,042 -I just don't think it's a good idea. -Okay. 327 00:18:07,170 --> 00:18:08,630 Well, uh, I just... 328 00:18:10,381 --> 00:18:12,467 I came to say that I, uh... 329 00:18:15,470 --> 00:18:16,387 That I really miss you. 330 00:18:17,931 --> 00:18:21,851 And this is where it would be great if you could say that you also miss me, too. 331 00:18:22,018 --> 00:18:25,772 I do miss you. But I also wanna move on. 332 00:18:25,855 --> 00:18:27,482 And like I said, I don't wanna go backwards. 333 00:18:27,607 --> 00:18:30,693 I can't. So, you need to move on too. 334 00:18:32,195 --> 00:18:36,074 So long, so long 335 00:18:37,075 --> 00:18:42,789 You're strong So tough, but so wrong 336 00:18:43,998 --> 00:18:46,000 And just to prove you right 337 00:18:46,084 --> 00:18:49,671 You wanted honeybear to come over tonight 338 00:18:50,088 --> 00:18:53,424 And so I look you up 339 00:18:56,886 --> 00:18:59,848 I prepared a statement. It's kind of long. 340 00:18:59,973 --> 00:19:02,934 It's okay, Kimberly. Let's just start with some questions. 341 00:19:03,393 --> 00:19:04,602 Um... 342 00:19:05,478 --> 00:19:07,605 Is it true that you cheated on Professor Bennett's midterm? 343 00:19:07,772 --> 00:19:08,648 Yes. 344 00:19:08,731 --> 00:19:10,024 And was Professor Bennett clear about 345 00:19:10,149 --> 00:19:12,861 what materials were and were not allowed during the test? 346 00:19:13,152 --> 00:19:14,028 Yes. 347 00:19:14,487 --> 00:19:16,155 So did you know that what you were doing was wrong? 348 00:19:16,447 --> 00:19:17,323 Yes. 349 00:19:18,116 --> 00:19:20,326 Boy, I don't like how these questions are making me look. 350 00:19:20,952 --> 00:19:24,706 Well, what you're describing is a clear violation of Essex Honor Code. 351 00:19:25,498 --> 00:19:28,585 -We take that very seriously. -I know. I messed up. 352 00:19:29,794 --> 00:19:30,837 But this isn't me. 353 00:19:31,254 --> 00:19:33,464 I've never been in trouble in my life before, 354 00:19:34,382 --> 00:19:36,509 but I'm just kind of struggling here. 355 00:19:36,718 --> 00:19:40,346 The classes are amazing, but they're hard. At least I think so. 356 00:19:40,930 --> 00:19:42,974 And I wanna do well. 357 00:19:43,516 --> 00:19:46,936 But I also work five days a week just so that I can afford to go here. 358 00:19:47,020 --> 00:19:51,524 And I don't mean to make excuses or complain about being poor, 359 00:19:51,649 --> 00:19:55,236 but you have no idea how hard it was for my family to send me here. 360 00:19:55,653 --> 00:19:58,156 My mom had to sell her piano, and that really sucked. 361 00:20:00,366 --> 00:20:03,912 And that's fine. It's fine. I'm fine. It's who we are. 362 00:20:05,705 --> 00:20:09,208 But I guess that's why I feel so much pressure to do well. 363 00:20:09,709 --> 00:20:12,211 I know what I did is wrong and I won't do it again. 364 00:20:12,962 --> 00:20:16,257 But my spot at Essex means everything to me. I can't lose it. 365 00:20:18,134 --> 00:20:20,345 I should have ended with the "I won't do this again" thing. 366 00:20:21,012 --> 00:20:21,930 I won't do this again. 367 00:20:26,935 --> 00:20:29,312 Okay. Thank you for your statement. 368 00:20:31,397 --> 00:20:32,815 Is there anything else you'd like to share? 369 00:20:33,942 --> 00:20:35,276 Actually, yes. 370 00:20:54,587 --> 00:20:56,255 Baby, I wanted to apologize. 371 00:20:56,881 --> 00:20:59,425 I saw that article and I assumed the worst of you. 372 00:20:59,509 --> 00:21:02,929 -It's okay, Mom. -No, it's not okay. 373 00:21:03,763 --> 00:21:06,099 I get scrutinized so much in my line of work. 374 00:21:06,182 --> 00:21:09,435 If I show half an inch of cleavage, I am a headline on Breitbart. 375 00:21:10,395 --> 00:21:13,481 And it makes me so much stricter on you, which isn't fair. 376 00:21:14,691 --> 00:21:16,818 You shouldn't have to pay the price for my career. 377 00:21:17,193 --> 00:21:19,612 -You are a good kid-- -I did it. It was me. 378 00:21:20,613 --> 00:21:22,198 I was the girl. 379 00:21:24,075 --> 00:21:24,951 Which girl? 380 00:21:27,453 --> 00:21:28,705 The one who had the affair with the coach. 381 00:21:30,289 --> 00:21:31,874 Willow was just pretending for me. 382 00:21:32,125 --> 00:21:33,418 -She's gay. -What? 383 00:21:33,584 --> 00:21:35,003 I know. She was very convincing. 384 00:21:35,128 --> 00:21:36,796 You know that's not what I was talking about. 385 00:21:37,714 --> 00:21:38,715 You had an-- 386 00:21:40,174 --> 00:21:42,969 You had an affair with your soccer coach? 387 00:21:43,177 --> 00:21:45,972 How could you have kept this from me and lied to me about it? 388 00:21:46,055 --> 00:21:47,557 I knew it was wrong, but I was in love with him. 389 00:21:47,682 --> 00:21:49,183 I am so upset. 390 00:21:50,727 --> 00:21:53,604 I know you're angry with me. Sorry. 391 00:21:54,522 --> 00:21:56,232 -I never-- -I'm not angry with you. 392 00:21:57,442 --> 00:22:00,236 -I'm angry with myself. -Mom, I didn't wanna disappoint you. 393 00:22:00,361 --> 00:22:01,696 How could I have let this happen? 394 00:22:02,613 --> 00:22:05,074 I'm your mother. I'm supposed to protect you. 395 00:22:05,616 --> 00:22:08,077 Instead, I made you feel like you had to keep this a secret. 396 00:22:09,370 --> 00:22:12,790 I just... I mean, I thought I could handle it by myself. 397 00:22:13,541 --> 00:22:17,211 Baby, you don't only have to tell me the good things. 398 00:22:17,879 --> 00:22:19,672 I'm also here when things are bad. 399 00:22:21,841 --> 00:22:24,552 Especially when things are bad. 400 00:22:35,980 --> 00:22:38,816 Listen. I don't have to leave for a while. 401 00:22:39,734 --> 00:22:42,070 Would you like to come back to my hotel and talk some more? 402 00:22:44,363 --> 00:22:46,657 -Yeah. That sounds good. -Okay. 403 00:22:49,202 --> 00:22:51,621 So you're trying to tell me your friend Willow is gay? 404 00:22:52,205 --> 00:22:54,248 I know. She's an amazing actress. 405 00:22:54,832 --> 00:22:57,543 How did the disciplinary hearing go? Did you cry? 406 00:22:58,127 --> 00:23:00,963 I cried a little. And then a lot on my way home. 407 00:23:02,048 --> 00:23:02,882 Kimberly. 408 00:23:03,966 --> 00:23:06,010 -You gave them the test, though, right? -Yeah. 409 00:23:08,554 --> 00:23:09,889 I think that it's gonna be fine. 410 00:23:10,681 --> 00:23:13,017 If Seasons 1 through 22 of SVU have taught me anything, 411 00:23:13,101 --> 00:23:14,393 it's that Chris Meloni can get it, 412 00:23:14,477 --> 00:23:16,229 and that turning over evidence always works. 413 00:23:17,396 --> 00:23:18,773 -I hope so. -Me too. 414 00:23:20,108 --> 00:23:23,069 All right. I am gonna go meet up with Evangeline and Jo. 415 00:23:23,152 --> 00:23:24,779 Okay. Where are the others? 416 00:23:25,071 --> 00:23:26,864 Whitney's out, and I think Leighton's still in bed. 417 00:23:27,156 --> 00:23:29,075 Leighton's still in bed? It's almost noon. 418 00:23:29,158 --> 00:23:30,034 Yeah. 419 00:23:37,959 --> 00:23:40,128 -Leighton? -Go away, please. 420 00:23:41,504 --> 00:23:44,132 -Are you crying? -I'm fine. 421 00:23:44,715 --> 00:23:46,092 What's going on? What's wrong? 422 00:23:47,635 --> 00:23:50,513 I was seeing someone and I fucked it up. 423 00:23:51,430 --> 00:23:53,391 I fucked it up because I am fucked up. 424 00:23:54,392 --> 00:23:56,644 I didn't even know you were seeing someone. 425 00:23:58,855 --> 00:23:59,814 But you're not fucked up. 426 00:24:01,149 --> 00:24:04,777 You're, like, the most together person I know. 427 00:24:06,362 --> 00:24:09,365 You're so pretty and you're so smart. 428 00:24:09,699 --> 00:24:12,577 And if this guy's too stupid to see that, then it's his loss. 429 00:24:14,912 --> 00:24:15,788 Okay? 430 00:24:17,874 --> 00:24:20,168 Don't cry. He's not worth it. 431 00:24:22,336 --> 00:24:25,423 It wasn't a guy. It was a girl. I'm gay. 432 00:24:28,968 --> 00:24:30,595 Oh, Leighton. 433 00:24:36,100 --> 00:24:37,226 Does anyone else know? 434 00:24:39,270 --> 00:24:40,104 No. 435 00:24:42,565 --> 00:24:47,195 -Wow. I'm surprised you're telling me. -Yeah. Well, me too. 436 00:24:48,946 --> 00:24:50,281 I'm really proud of you. 437 00:24:51,824 --> 00:24:55,703 I don't wanna be like this. Kimberly, it's terrifying. 438 00:24:56,704 --> 00:24:58,497 I don't want my whole life to change. 439 00:25:00,458 --> 00:25:03,711 I get it. Coming out seems really scary. 440 00:25:03,961 --> 00:25:05,713 Yeah. 441 00:25:06,047 --> 00:25:07,089 But I think... 442 00:25:08,591 --> 00:25:13,179 the only way you can be happy is if you're yourself. 443 00:25:20,269 --> 00:25:22,521 I will be there 444 00:25:22,605 --> 00:25:24,732 Don't you be scared 445 00:25:24,982 --> 00:25:26,651 I will be there 446 00:25:26,817 --> 00:25:28,444 Don't you be scared 447 00:25:28,527 --> 00:25:32,573 -You are a really good person. -So are you. 448 00:25:34,992 --> 00:25:36,744 You're not just telling me this because there's a chance 449 00:25:36,827 --> 00:25:38,204 I might get expelled soon, right? 450 00:25:39,038 --> 00:25:40,915 No. At least, not on any level that I realize. 451 00:25:41,082 --> 00:25:41,916 Okay. 452 00:25:51,425 --> 00:25:54,136 Remember that thick-necked hottie that hit on Leighton last night? 453 00:25:54,220 --> 00:25:58,140 Well, I am three years deep into his Insta, and I just found this. 454 00:25:59,267 --> 00:26:00,268 Oh, my God. 455 00:26:00,351 --> 00:26:03,104 Right? Leighton, you gotta ride this dude like a log flume. 456 00:26:04,021 --> 00:26:06,941 -I think Leighton can do better. -Do better? 457 00:26:07,775 --> 00:26:09,860 - Look at his V muscles. - Oh, shit. 458 00:26:10,069 --> 00:26:11,529 The email from the Honor Board came in. 459 00:26:14,323 --> 00:26:15,157 What does it say? 460 00:26:17,201 --> 00:26:18,786 -I'm not expelled. -Yes. 461 00:26:19,203 --> 00:26:20,121 Oh, my God. 462 00:26:20,204 --> 00:26:21,372 -You scared me. -That's great. 463 00:26:24,292 --> 00:26:26,502 What is wrong? Why aren't you happy? 464 00:26:27,878 --> 00:26:29,463 They revoked my scholarship. 465 00:26:32,174 --> 00:26:36,637 So I have to find an extra $23,000 a semester.