1 00:00:17,183 --> 00:00:17,392 . 2 00:00:17,434 --> 00:00:17,767 - Nothing? 3 00:00:19,269 --> 00:00:21,980 - * It's true * 4 00:00:22,022 --> 00:00:26,067 * The marriage that we once had now is through * 5 00:00:26,109 --> 00:00:30,321 * And now we're doing all that we can do * 6 00:00:30,363 --> 00:00:34,701 * To keep us all together as a crew * 7 00:00:34,743 --> 00:00:38,496 * Just do as we say, not as we do * 8 00:00:38,538 --> 00:00:42,500 * We really thought that we were done * 9 00:00:42,542 --> 00:00:45,128 * But we've just begun * 10 00:00:47,047 --> 00:00:48,214 - Has anybody heard from your mother? 11 00:00:48,256 --> 00:00:49,174 - Nope. - I've not. 12 00:00:49,215 --> 00:00:50,675 - Hmm. 13 00:00:50,717 --> 00:00:51,718 I gotta get to the Sons of Liberty reenactment. 14 00:00:51,760 --> 00:00:53,136 I can't be late. 15 00:00:53,178 --> 00:00:56,639 As you may have deduced, the redcoats are coming. 16 00:00:56,681 --> 00:00:59,100 - Something tells me it'll all be OK. 17 00:00:59,142 --> 00:01:02,228 - If Paul Revere doesn't ride, the entire course of history 18 00:01:02,270 --> 00:01:03,688 could be changed. 19 00:01:03,730 --> 00:01:05,607 By breakfast, we could all be subjects of the king. 20 00:01:06,483 --> 00:01:08,610 - I'll take my chances. 21 00:01:08,651 --> 00:01:10,904 - Um, what did you do with my whale oil lantern? 22 00:01:10,945 --> 00:01:12,030 - Oh, sorry. 23 00:01:12,072 --> 00:01:13,239 It's recharging in the hallway. 24 00:01:14,908 --> 00:01:16,951 - Seriously, how do I look? 25 00:01:16,993 --> 00:01:18,661 - Devastating. 26 00:01:18,703 --> 00:01:21,956 Betsy Ross is going to go all wobbly in her petticoats. 27 00:01:21,998 --> 00:01:23,500 - She isn't Betsy Ross yet. 28 00:01:23,541 --> 00:01:25,919 She's still Betsy Griscom, single and available. 29 00:01:25,960 --> 00:01:27,587 And last week at rehearsal, I couldn't tell 30 00:01:27,629 --> 00:01:29,464 if she was flirting with me or Ben Franklin. 31 00:01:30,507 --> 00:01:32,092 - Just ask her for her number. 32 00:01:32,133 --> 00:01:35,178 - Yes, as they would have in 1775. 33 00:01:36,304 --> 00:01:38,264 Oh, I know what this is. 34 00:01:38,306 --> 00:01:39,599 You're upset that I'm dating. 35 00:01:39,641 --> 00:01:42,519 - Dad, I'm thrilled that you're trying to date. 36 00:01:43,978 --> 00:01:44,938 - Good. 37 00:01:44,979 --> 00:01:46,356 I'm glad. 38 00:01:46,398 --> 00:01:48,525 - I might have suggested a clever online profile 39 00:01:48,566 --> 00:01:51,319 or an appealing photo or two, but whatever. 40 00:01:51,361 --> 00:01:53,822 If you're more comfortable with cosplay, God bless. 41 00:01:55,657 --> 00:01:56,574 - Thanks. 42 00:01:56,616 --> 00:01:58,451 Your opinion means a lot to me. 43 00:01:58,493 --> 00:02:01,121 - Truth is, dating gets harder the older you get. 44 00:02:01,162 --> 00:02:02,080 - Oh, it's never easy. 45 00:02:02,122 --> 00:02:03,623 Trust me. 46 00:02:03,665 --> 00:02:06,710 - I do not want to know why you just said that. 47 00:02:06,751 --> 00:02:08,461 - All right, Dad, I turned off the Bluetooth 48 00:02:08,503 --> 00:02:10,672 on your whale-oil lantern so it doesn't start 49 00:02:10,714 --> 00:02:11,798 playing Lil Nas X. 50 00:02:13,591 --> 00:02:15,135 - See? You get it. 51 00:02:15,176 --> 00:02:18,304 Verisimilitude is the backbone of historical fiction. 52 00:02:18,346 --> 00:02:20,890 My DNA is strong with this one. 53 00:02:20,932 --> 00:02:23,893 - Great news. 54 00:02:23,935 --> 00:02:25,645 - Well, I'm going to grab my musket, 55 00:02:25,687 --> 00:02:29,441 and then it's time to throw off the yoke of tyranny. 56 00:02:29,482 --> 00:02:31,151 Taxation without representation? 57 00:02:31,192 --> 00:02:32,944 I don't think so. 58 00:02:32,986 --> 00:02:35,572 Can I rely on you to man the fort, General Washington? 59 00:02:35,613 --> 00:02:36,614 - Man it? 60 00:02:36,656 --> 00:02:37,490 No. 61 00:02:37,532 --> 00:02:38,783 But I can woman it. 62 00:02:38,825 --> 00:02:39,826 - Even better. 63 00:02:39,868 --> 00:02:41,703 Woman it, then, please. 64 00:02:44,039 --> 00:02:48,626 - [laughs] 65 00:02:48,668 --> 00:02:50,503 I'm not even going to ask. 66 00:02:52,130 --> 00:02:54,341 I am looking at you... 67 00:02:54,382 --> 00:02:58,511 [laughing] 68 00:02:58,553 --> 00:03:04,225 Telling myself "I can get through this" without asking. 69 00:03:04,267 --> 00:03:06,227 It's not going to be easy. 70 00:03:08,730 --> 00:03:09,689 - Finished? 71 00:03:09,731 --> 00:03:13,276 - Hold on. 72 00:03:13,318 --> 00:03:15,528 OK. 73 00:03:15,570 --> 00:03:17,364 - Where's Julia? - Oh, she had a work emergency. 74 00:03:17,405 --> 00:03:18,406 - What kind of work emergency? 75 00:03:18,448 --> 00:03:19,616 - She didn't say, and I didn't ask. 76 00:03:19,657 --> 00:03:20,658 - Why not? 77 00:03:20,700 --> 00:03:23,078 - Because she texted, "Don't ask." 78 00:03:23,119 --> 00:03:25,413 - Your marriage just might work. 79 00:03:25,455 --> 00:03:26,998 But listen, I gotta head out, 'cause-- 80 00:03:27,040 --> 00:03:28,375 - No, no, no, no, no. 81 00:03:28,416 --> 00:03:30,126 Don't tell me. 82 00:03:30,168 --> 00:03:34,756 'Cause whatever it is, it won't be as good as my imagination. 83 00:03:34,798 --> 00:03:36,341 - Hey, Trey. - Hey, Gracie. 84 00:03:36,383 --> 00:03:37,717 What's up? 85 00:03:37,759 --> 00:03:39,052 - Dad, can I have a sleepover? - Ooh. 86 00:03:39,094 --> 00:03:40,095 I'm off duty. 87 00:03:40,136 --> 00:03:41,638 That's up to your mom. 88 00:03:41,680 --> 00:03:42,931 - Oh, I texted her, but her "do not disturb" is on. 89 00:03:42,972 --> 00:03:44,391 - That's OK. 90 00:03:44,432 --> 00:03:45,850 Your mom's entrusted full responsibility 91 00:03:45,892 --> 00:03:47,560 until she arrives to me. 92 00:03:47,602 --> 00:03:51,648 So as your future stepdad, I say, commence the sleepover. 93 00:03:51,690 --> 00:03:52,691 - Yay! 94 00:03:52,732 --> 00:03:54,234 Thank you, Trey. 95 00:03:54,275 --> 00:03:57,112 - Sleepovers are the best. 96 00:03:57,153 --> 00:04:00,740 - Bold move agreeing to a sleepover without any data. 97 00:04:00,782 --> 00:04:02,784 You don't know how many kids are coming. 98 00:04:02,826 --> 00:04:04,077 You don't know what parents-- 99 00:04:04,119 --> 00:04:05,120 - Uh, Grace, I need some data. 100 00:04:05,161 --> 00:04:06,871 How many kids are coming? 101 00:04:06,913 --> 00:04:08,540 - Just Katie. 102 00:04:08,581 --> 00:04:09,916 The Katie I brought to your suite at the Lakers game. 103 00:04:09,958 --> 00:04:11,001 - Oh, I love that Katie. 104 00:04:11,042 --> 00:04:12,711 Do you know that Katie, Jim? - I do. 105 00:04:12,752 --> 00:04:14,421 She's Grace's best friend since kindergarten. 106 00:04:14,462 --> 00:04:17,507 I've met her, conservatively, 9,000 times. 107 00:04:19,634 --> 00:04:23,263 - Hey, Paul, don't you have a midnight ride to get to? 108 00:04:23,304 --> 00:04:24,264 - Oh, my god! 109 00:04:24,305 --> 00:04:26,099 Paul Revere! 110 00:04:26,141 --> 00:04:28,268 [laughs] 111 00:04:28,309 --> 00:04:29,769 Thank God. 112 00:04:29,811 --> 00:04:31,354 I was about to ask for some Crunch Berries. 113 00:04:31,396 --> 00:04:33,356 [laughs] 114 00:04:33,398 --> 00:04:37,277 Aye, aye, Captain. 115 00:04:37,318 --> 00:04:40,655 [upbeat music] 116 00:04:40,697 --> 00:04:42,532 - Mr. Kearney, should be feeling the sedative 117 00:04:42,574 --> 00:04:43,950 take effect in a few minutes. 118 00:04:43,992 --> 00:04:46,244 Just lie back and relax. 119 00:04:46,286 --> 00:04:48,788 - Julia, this is an incredibly nice thing you're doing 120 00:04:48,830 --> 00:04:49,998 for your former father-in-law. 121 00:04:50,040 --> 00:04:51,332 - Oh. 122 00:04:51,374 --> 00:04:52,751 I may be divorced from your son, 123 00:04:52,792 --> 00:04:54,586 but you'll be my kids' grandpa for life, 124 00:04:54,627 --> 00:04:58,089 helping them, spoiling them, losing them in a crowd. 125 00:04:59,758 --> 00:05:04,679 - Hampton Beach is a very complicated beach. 126 00:05:04,721 --> 00:05:07,766 You know, thanks for keeping it a secret from Jim. 127 00:05:07,807 --> 00:05:11,019 If he ever heard I had a kidney stone, he'd be worried sick. 128 00:05:11,061 --> 00:05:12,520 - He loves you very much. 129 00:05:12,562 --> 00:05:13,980 - I blame myself. 130 00:05:14,022 --> 00:05:16,232 Once when he was a kid, I pretended I was dead 131 00:05:16,274 --> 00:05:19,235 for the entire afternoon. 132 00:05:19,277 --> 00:05:23,114 Best nap I ever had. 133 00:05:23,156 --> 00:05:25,408 - Drug's kicking in, Bobby? 134 00:05:25,450 --> 00:05:26,951 - Oh, yeah. 135 00:05:26,993 --> 00:05:29,162 I can't believe I ever judged junkies. 136 00:05:29,204 --> 00:05:31,831 They're on to something. 137 00:05:35,543 --> 00:05:35,752 . 138 00:05:35,794 --> 00:05:36,544 - [laughing] - Okey dokey. 139 00:05:37,671 --> 00:05:39,047 I hope Julia's emergency is short-lived. 140 00:05:39,089 --> 00:05:41,966 Oh, and I've gotta hit the, uh, little patriots room. 141 00:05:42,008 --> 00:05:43,009 Then I will be on my way. 142 00:05:43,051 --> 00:05:44,094 But you got this. 143 00:05:44,135 --> 00:05:45,095 - OK. 144 00:05:45,136 --> 00:05:46,221 [doorbell rings] 145 00:05:46,262 --> 00:05:49,140 Ooh. 146 00:05:49,182 --> 00:05:51,184 [exhales] 147 00:05:51,226 --> 00:05:52,394 Hey, Katie. What's up? 148 00:05:52,435 --> 00:05:53,895 - Hi. - Trey Taylor, remember? 149 00:05:53,937 --> 00:05:54,979 - [chuckles] 150 00:05:55,021 --> 00:05:56,147 Is Grace here? 151 00:05:56,189 --> 00:05:57,607 - Hey, Katie. How's it-- 152 00:05:57,649 --> 00:05:59,025 - Hi, Mr. Kearney. 153 00:05:59,067 --> 00:06:00,110 - Katie? - [sobbing] 154 00:06:00,151 --> 00:06:02,153 - What did you guys say to her? 155 00:06:02,195 --> 00:06:04,072 both: Nothing. 156 00:06:04,114 --> 00:06:06,449 - Derek just dumped me. 157 00:06:06,491 --> 00:06:07,492 - OK. 158 00:06:07,534 --> 00:06:09,285 OK, let's go to the kitchen. 159 00:06:09,327 --> 00:06:13,456 - [wailing] 160 00:06:13,498 --> 00:06:15,917 - Sleepovers are the best. 161 00:06:15,959 --> 00:06:18,878 [upbeat music] 162 00:06:18,920 --> 00:06:20,839 * * 163 00:06:20,880 --> 00:06:22,382 - Feeling any better now, Robert? 164 00:06:22,424 --> 00:06:23,883 - Flying high, Doc. 165 00:06:23,925 --> 00:06:26,511 - So to view the kidney stones, we will insert 166 00:06:26,553 --> 00:06:29,097 a camera into your urethra. 167 00:06:29,139 --> 00:06:30,807 - Perfect. 168 00:06:30,849 --> 00:06:32,684 - In my 40 years, this is the first time 169 00:06:32,726 --> 00:06:34,436 I have gotten that reaction. 170 00:06:37,397 --> 00:06:39,315 - Camera in my urethra. 171 00:06:39,357 --> 00:06:40,567 Simple in and out. 172 00:06:40,608 --> 00:06:43,028 Lickety-split. 173 00:06:43,069 --> 00:06:46,197 - Bobby, do you know what the urethra is? 174 00:06:46,239 --> 00:06:48,533 - I don't. 175 00:06:48,575 --> 00:06:51,828 But the doctor was wearing a Rolex, so he must. 176 00:06:52,662 --> 00:06:55,540 - The urethra is the tube that runs from your bladder 177 00:06:55,582 --> 00:06:58,793 to the tip of your...device. 178 00:06:58,835 --> 00:06:59,669 - Device? 179 00:06:59,711 --> 00:07:02,380 What, like my iPhone? 180 00:07:02,422 --> 00:07:05,342 - No, the tip of your-- your unit. 181 00:07:05,383 --> 00:07:06,718 - Unit? 182 00:07:06,760 --> 00:07:08,428 - Your device, your unit, your member? 183 00:07:08,470 --> 00:07:09,512 - I'm sorry. 184 00:07:09,554 --> 00:07:10,972 I was never good at "Pyramid." 185 00:07:12,557 --> 00:07:13,850 - Your penis? 186 00:07:13,892 --> 00:07:15,018 - My penis? 187 00:07:15,060 --> 00:07:17,187 What the hell's he doing down there? 188 00:07:17,228 --> 00:07:19,814 It's a kidney stone, not a penis stone. 189 00:07:19,856 --> 00:07:23,443 Tell that butcher he's gotta find another way in! 190 00:07:23,485 --> 00:07:24,569 - They're all set for you. 191 00:07:24,611 --> 00:07:27,655 - You guys are barbarians! 192 00:07:27,697 --> 00:07:29,157 - We may need a minute. 193 00:07:29,199 --> 00:07:32,369 [upbeat music] 194 00:07:32,410 --> 00:07:34,037 - Hey-hey, Revere. 195 00:07:34,079 --> 00:07:36,081 Where's your outfit? 196 00:07:36,122 --> 00:07:37,248 - I texted my understudy. 197 00:07:37,290 --> 00:07:38,291 He's going to go on. 198 00:07:38,333 --> 00:07:40,001 But it's gonna be a disaster. 199 00:07:40,043 --> 00:07:42,545 He knows nothing about being a silversmith. 200 00:07:42,587 --> 00:07:45,757 Or the needs of a woman like Betsy Ross. 201 00:07:45,799 --> 00:07:47,425 But I cannot leave you alone. 202 00:07:47,467 --> 00:07:48,468 - What are you talking about? 203 00:07:48,510 --> 00:07:49,719 I can handle a sleepover. 204 00:07:49,761 --> 00:07:51,888 You yourself said I got this. 205 00:07:51,930 --> 00:07:53,264 Me got this. 206 00:07:53,306 --> 00:07:54,599 - I said you got that. 207 00:07:54,641 --> 00:07:55,684 Now there's a crying girl involved. 208 00:07:55,725 --> 00:07:57,185 You do not got this. 209 00:07:57,227 --> 00:07:58,561 - So you got this? 210 00:07:58,603 --> 00:08:00,271 - I got this more than you got this. 211 00:08:00,313 --> 00:08:01,314 - Show me what you got. 212 00:08:01,356 --> 00:08:02,857 What are you going to do? 213 00:08:02,899 --> 00:08:05,235 - Nothing. 214 00:08:05,276 --> 00:08:07,153 - Yeah, I'm pretty sure I could've done nothing. 215 00:08:07,195 --> 00:08:08,655 - Mm. 216 00:08:08,697 --> 00:08:10,615 But could you do nothing in a strategic manner? 217 00:08:10,657 --> 00:08:12,283 These are young adult women-- 218 00:08:12,325 --> 00:08:13,952 people. 219 00:08:13,993 --> 00:08:17,288 So we're going to let them work it out while we monitor. 220 00:08:17,330 --> 00:08:18,873 - We're going to spy on them? 221 00:08:18,915 --> 00:08:22,752 - I prefer the term "compassionate surveillance." 222 00:08:22,794 --> 00:08:24,504 - I look terrible. 223 00:08:24,546 --> 00:08:26,297 - No, you look so beautiful. 224 00:08:26,339 --> 00:08:27,674 - No, I'm hideous. 225 00:08:27,716 --> 00:08:28,800 - It's not true. 226 00:08:28,842 --> 00:08:30,552 You are such a pretty crier. 227 00:08:32,095 --> 00:08:33,722 - Thank you. 228 00:08:33,763 --> 00:08:35,473 - And Derek doesn't know what he's doing. 229 00:08:35,515 --> 00:08:36,975 - He does. 230 00:08:37,017 --> 00:08:40,353 His last text was, "I know what I'm doing." 231 00:08:40,395 --> 00:08:42,272 Why are boys so stupid? 232 00:08:42,313 --> 00:08:45,025 - The universe made them that way to train us. 233 00:08:45,066 --> 00:08:46,943 - It did? 234 00:08:46,985 --> 00:08:48,278 - Yes. 235 00:08:48,319 --> 00:08:50,989 It's trying to build our resilience by preparing us 236 00:08:51,031 --> 00:08:53,074 for all the dumb stuff that men are going to do 237 00:08:53,116 --> 00:08:54,826 when we get older. 238 00:08:54,868 --> 00:08:57,620 - Oh, my god, she's right. 239 00:08:57,662 --> 00:08:59,330 - You gotta help me win him back, Grace. 240 00:08:59,372 --> 00:09:00,665 - No. 241 00:09:00,707 --> 00:09:01,583 That will only make you look weak. 242 00:09:01,624 --> 00:09:03,251 - But I am weak. 243 00:09:03,293 --> 00:09:04,294 - That's not true. 244 00:09:04,336 --> 00:09:05,503 You're stronger than him. 245 00:09:05,545 --> 00:09:07,422 - If I'm strong, why am I crying? 246 00:09:07,464 --> 00:09:09,424 - Because strong people have to cry. 247 00:09:09,466 --> 00:09:11,718 Because cr--crying is brave. 248 00:09:11,760 --> 00:09:13,595 - Since when? 249 00:09:13,636 --> 00:09:15,138 - Since always, but no one's ever told us. 250 00:09:15,180 --> 00:09:17,432 So I'm telling you that you are very 251 00:09:17,474 --> 00:09:18,683 strong to show your emotions. 252 00:09:18,725 --> 00:09:20,727 - Hmm. I need to lay down. 253 00:09:24,439 --> 00:09:27,192 - Uh, I believe these are indigenous to South America. 254 00:09:27,233 --> 00:09:28,610 - Really? 255 00:09:28,651 --> 00:09:31,571 I don't know what you're talking about. 256 00:09:33,448 --> 00:09:36,910 - OK, if we're going to surveil together, you better get wise. 257 00:09:36,951 --> 00:09:39,412 If and when our cover is blown, whatever I say, 258 00:09:39,454 --> 00:09:40,538 you have to go along with. 259 00:09:40,580 --> 00:09:43,833 The rule is "yes, and." 260 00:09:43,875 --> 00:09:45,543 You can't say, "Uh, I have no idea 261 00:09:45,585 --> 00:09:46,711 what you're talking about." 262 00:09:46,753 --> 00:09:48,546 That's how people get killed. 263 00:09:48,588 --> 00:09:50,757 - Got it. Learning as I go. 264 00:09:50,799 --> 00:09:53,385 [door rattling] 265 00:09:53,426 --> 00:09:55,720 What the hell is that? It looks like a boy. 266 00:09:55,762 --> 00:09:56,971 - Did you put him out there? 267 00:09:57,013 --> 00:09:59,808 - Did I put a boy on a balcony? 268 00:09:59,849 --> 00:10:01,226 What kind of question is that? 269 00:10:01,267 --> 00:10:03,770 I've been standing right here next to you. 270 00:10:03,812 --> 00:10:06,231 - Hi, Mr. Kearney. 271 00:10:11,903 --> 00:10:12,070 . 272 00:10:12,112 --> 00:10:12,987 - Um, Derek, this is Trey Taylor. 273 00:10:14,030 --> 00:10:14,823 - Of course. 274 00:10:14,864 --> 00:10:16,199 Hello, Mr. Taylor. 275 00:10:16,241 --> 00:10:17,283 Go, Celts. 276 00:10:17,325 --> 00:10:18,368 - Thank you. 277 00:10:18,410 --> 00:10:21,246 Always nice to meet a fan. 278 00:10:21,287 --> 00:10:23,707 - Easy, Sinatra. 279 00:10:23,748 --> 00:10:25,166 How did you get up here? 280 00:10:25,208 --> 00:10:27,043 - I took the elevator to the roof of the building 281 00:10:27,085 --> 00:10:28,503 next door. 282 00:10:28,545 --> 00:10:30,296 Then I parkoured from the roof over there to your roof. 283 00:10:30,338 --> 00:10:33,591 Then I came down the fire escape to your apartment. 284 00:10:33,633 --> 00:10:37,053 - When you say you parkoured-- 285 00:10:37,095 --> 00:10:38,221 - I vaulted. 286 00:10:38,263 --> 00:10:40,098 - You vaulted? 287 00:10:40,140 --> 00:10:42,058 - No Ring cameras out there, Jim? 288 00:10:42,100 --> 00:10:43,768 - No, Trey, there's no Ring cameras out there. 289 00:10:43,810 --> 00:10:45,186 This is the first time Spider-Man 290 00:10:45,228 --> 00:10:47,564 has paid us a visit. 291 00:10:47,605 --> 00:10:48,982 - Is Grace home? 292 00:10:49,024 --> 00:10:50,150 - Oh. 293 00:10:50,191 --> 00:10:52,027 Is that all you wanted to find out? 294 00:10:52,068 --> 00:10:53,695 Seems like an answer you could have got without free-soloing 295 00:10:53,737 --> 00:10:55,822 down our building. 296 00:10:55,864 --> 00:10:58,533 - I can't text her, because I skipped out on 297 00:10:58,575 --> 00:10:59,784 my National Honor Society meeting 298 00:10:59,826 --> 00:11:01,578 and left my phone in the bushes, 299 00:11:01,619 --> 00:11:03,788 so if my parents look me up on Life360, 300 00:11:03,830 --> 00:11:05,165 they'll still think I'm at the school. 301 00:11:05,206 --> 00:11:06,207 - Mm. 302 00:11:06,249 --> 00:11:08,043 Well, thank you for being honest 303 00:11:08,084 --> 00:11:09,961 about your dishonesty, Derek. 304 00:11:10,003 --> 00:11:12,213 - Derek, what-- what are you doing here? 305 00:11:12,255 --> 00:11:14,049 - Grace, can I talk to you in private? 306 00:11:14,090 --> 00:11:15,133 - Why? 307 00:11:15,175 --> 00:11:16,426 So I won't tell Katie that you're 308 00:11:16,468 --> 00:11:17,552 a careless, mean, stupid boy? 309 00:11:17,594 --> 00:11:18,887 Too late. 310 00:11:18,928 --> 00:11:20,388 - I didn't say or do anything mean. 311 00:11:20,430 --> 00:11:22,098 I tried to just be honest about what I felt. 312 00:11:22,140 --> 00:11:24,309 - Honesty. Yeah, that's always the excuse. 313 00:11:27,020 --> 00:11:28,521 Do I really gotta talk to you about this 314 00:11:28,563 --> 00:11:30,315 in front of your dad and the owner of the Celtics? 315 00:11:33,151 --> 00:11:36,738 - Yes, actually. - Bet your little tushy. 316 00:11:36,780 --> 00:11:39,991 - Dad, Trey, could you--could you give us a moment, please? 317 00:11:40,033 --> 00:11:41,326 - Oh. - Yeah, sure. 318 00:11:41,368 --> 00:11:42,827 - Yeah, it's, uh-- it's important to respect, 319 00:11:42,869 --> 00:11:44,162 uh, your space. 320 00:11:44,204 --> 00:11:47,624 - Give the privacy that you deserve. 321 00:11:47,665 --> 00:11:49,834 - Derek, what is going on? 322 00:11:49,876 --> 00:11:53,338 - I broke up with Katie, because I'm in love with you. 323 00:11:53,380 --> 00:11:55,298 - Wait. What? 324 00:11:55,340 --> 00:11:56,800 - I broke up with Katie, because I'm-- 325 00:11:56,841 --> 00:11:58,802 - No, don't say it again. 326 00:11:58,843 --> 00:12:00,261 - I've felt this way since the fifth grade, 327 00:12:00,303 --> 00:12:04,057 and I've never had the guts to say it till now. 328 00:12:04,099 --> 00:12:06,685 Thanks for hearing me say it. 329 00:12:06,726 --> 00:12:08,687 I need to go before I get grounded. 330 00:12:18,530 --> 00:12:19,572 - Uh, right here. 331 00:12:19,614 --> 00:12:20,907 See? 332 00:12:20,949 --> 00:12:23,827 Um, it says "refrigerate after opening." 333 00:12:23,868 --> 00:12:25,704 - Yes, and? 334 00:12:28,373 --> 00:12:30,458 Wh-wh-what else does it say, Jim? 335 00:12:34,045 --> 00:12:37,465 - "Use by October 12th." 336 00:12:37,507 --> 00:12:39,217 - Trey, could you get Jimmy to distract Katie 337 00:12:39,259 --> 00:12:40,343 for a few minutes? 338 00:12:40,385 --> 00:12:41,553 - Absolutely. 339 00:12:41,594 --> 00:12:43,263 You got this. 340 00:12:43,304 --> 00:12:46,224 [upbeat music] 341 00:12:46,266 --> 00:12:48,226 * * 342 00:12:48,268 --> 00:12:49,602 - Bobby? Open up. 343 00:12:49,644 --> 00:12:52,939 - I won't! I won't! I won't! 344 00:12:52,981 --> 00:12:55,483 - If your dad thinks urethral entry is scary now, 345 00:12:55,525 --> 00:12:58,069 wait till the drugs wear off. 346 00:12:58,111 --> 00:13:01,698 - Uh, he does think it's scary, and he's not my dad. 347 00:13:01,740 --> 00:13:05,285 And I can think of many other places I'd rather be. 348 00:13:05,326 --> 00:13:09,164 Thousands and thousands and millions of other sentences 349 00:13:09,205 --> 00:13:11,666 I'd rather be speaking than, "Your dink is not in danger!" 350 00:13:11,708 --> 00:13:14,961 [upbeat music] 351 00:13:15,003 --> 00:13:16,963 - Dad, I need your advice. 352 00:13:17,005 --> 00:13:19,424 Derek has been, like, the coolest guy ever 353 00:13:19,466 --> 00:13:20,675 since seventh grade. 354 00:13:20,717 --> 00:13:22,510 Every girl in school has had a crush on him. 355 00:13:22,552 --> 00:13:25,722 He's good at baseball, basketball, soccer. 356 00:13:25,764 --> 00:13:27,098 He's smart. 357 00:13:27,140 --> 00:13:28,600 - Eh... 358 00:13:28,641 --> 00:13:30,101 - Well-- and here's the problem. 359 00:13:30,143 --> 00:13:33,396 He said he likes me, and that's why he came here. 360 00:13:33,438 --> 00:13:37,901 And my head is spinning, 'cause the most popular guy in Boston 361 00:13:37,942 --> 00:13:39,402 just said he likes me. 362 00:13:39,444 --> 00:13:40,695 - Mm. 363 00:13:40,737 --> 00:13:42,197 Tom Brady is kind of popular. 364 00:13:42,238 --> 00:13:45,158 - Dad. 365 00:13:45,200 --> 00:13:47,911 - And you think you might like Derek back? 366 00:13:47,952 --> 00:13:49,579 - Well, you've met him. 367 00:13:49,621 --> 00:13:52,290 Wouldn't you? 368 00:13:52,332 --> 00:13:53,792 - Huh. 369 00:13:53,833 --> 00:13:54,834 Huh. 370 00:13:54,876 --> 00:13:56,252 Hmm. 371 00:13:56,294 --> 00:13:57,754 Isn't this a nice night for your mother 372 00:13:57,796 --> 00:14:00,674 to have a work emergency? 373 00:14:08,223 --> 00:14:08,431 . 374 00:14:08,473 --> 00:14:09,099 - You know what, Bobby? 375 00:14:09,974 --> 00:14:11,393 I regret coming here. 376 00:14:11,434 --> 00:14:12,769 - Why? 377 00:14:12,811 --> 00:14:14,604 - Because you obviously don't really 378 00:14:14,646 --> 00:14:15,855 think that highly of me. 379 00:14:15,897 --> 00:14:17,565 - Of course I do. 380 00:14:17,607 --> 00:14:19,901 - No, you don't, because if you did, you'd take my counsel. 381 00:14:19,943 --> 00:14:21,486 - My dad's stubborn like yours. 382 00:14:21,528 --> 00:14:24,155 - He's not my dad. 383 00:14:24,197 --> 00:14:26,324 I help people in crisis, Bobby. 384 00:14:26,366 --> 00:14:28,410 People pay me to help them when they 385 00:14:28,451 --> 00:14:29,744 are not thinking straight, as you 386 00:14:29,786 --> 00:14:31,162 are not thinking straight now. 387 00:14:31,204 --> 00:14:34,457 And while I don't want and would never accept a penny 388 00:14:34,499 --> 00:14:36,459 from you, I would appreciate the courtesy 389 00:14:36,501 --> 00:14:37,794 of you considering what I have to say, 390 00:14:37,836 --> 00:14:39,129 because I'm about to snap. 391 00:14:41,089 --> 00:14:44,175 I promise you, they do far worse things every year 392 00:14:44,217 --> 00:14:47,345 at the OB/GYN, and you don't hear a word of complaint. 393 00:14:47,387 --> 00:14:49,389 You wouldn't last 10 minutes as a woman. 394 00:14:49,431 --> 00:14:52,434 None of you would. 395 00:14:52,475 --> 00:14:55,478 So I want you to open that door, 396 00:14:55,520 --> 00:14:59,315 suck it up, and spread your urethra to the sunshine. 397 00:15:02,152 --> 00:15:04,112 - Well, when you put it like that-- 398 00:15:06,823 --> 00:15:09,451 - Gracie, we're kind of crossing the Rubicon here, 399 00:15:09,492 --> 00:15:11,453 aren't we? 400 00:15:11,494 --> 00:15:13,455 - I don't understand. 401 00:15:13,496 --> 00:15:14,622 - Um, Caesar. 402 00:15:14,664 --> 00:15:15,999 Uh, Julius Caesar. 403 00:15:16,041 --> 00:15:19,085 There was a river, and once he crossed it-- 404 00:15:19,127 --> 00:15:22,380 look, all right, this whole teenage romance thing 405 00:15:22,422 --> 00:15:23,923 is not usually my area of expertise. 406 00:15:23,965 --> 00:15:25,925 - Mine, either. 407 00:15:25,967 --> 00:15:28,136 - OK, but if I were to take a stab at it, 408 00:15:28,178 --> 00:15:30,930 um, I think one thing I would say is that, um-- 409 00:15:30,972 --> 00:15:32,474 one thing you should be aware of, uh, 410 00:15:32,515 --> 00:15:37,979 is that deep down, uh, all of us are awful people. 411 00:15:38,021 --> 00:15:39,397 - Dad. - No, no, no. 412 00:15:39,439 --> 00:15:41,024 Seriously, I've been working my way 413 00:15:41,066 --> 00:15:42,734 through this observation ever since I was-- 414 00:15:42,776 --> 00:15:43,818 well, ever since I was your age. 415 00:15:43,860 --> 00:15:47,238 Um, people are--are awful. 416 00:15:47,280 --> 00:15:48,740 Awful. 417 00:15:48,782 --> 00:15:51,659 I think that's why someone a long, long time ago, 418 00:15:51,701 --> 00:15:54,704 uh, came up with the whole concept of what we call values 419 00:15:54,746 --> 00:15:57,749 to make us think deeply about the consequences 420 00:15:57,791 --> 00:16:00,669 of our being awful. 421 00:16:00,710 --> 00:16:04,339 Values ask us to pause, uh, before taking a flamethrower 422 00:16:04,381 --> 00:16:07,550 to our happiness, to not do selfish, impulsive things, 423 00:16:07,592 --> 00:16:09,511 even though selfish, impulsive choices 424 00:16:09,552 --> 00:16:11,012 sometimes feel fantastic. 425 00:16:11,054 --> 00:16:12,222 - They really do. - Yes. 426 00:16:12,263 --> 00:16:13,807 I know. I know. 427 00:16:13,848 --> 00:16:15,266 Whenever I get the urge to do something 428 00:16:15,308 --> 00:16:17,310 selfish and impulsive, I get all tingly inside. 429 00:16:17,352 --> 00:16:19,604 I--I feel incredibly alive. 430 00:16:19,646 --> 00:16:22,482 And for whatever reasons-- none that make any sense-- 431 00:16:22,524 --> 00:16:24,818 we're made to-- to feel these drives 432 00:16:24,859 --> 00:16:27,195 and emotions and feelings that do not 433 00:16:27,237 --> 00:16:30,448 serve us in any way other than to mess up our lives. 434 00:16:31,950 --> 00:16:34,744 - I hate how we're made. 435 00:16:34,786 --> 00:16:36,788 - And it's not all the time, 436 00:16:36,830 --> 00:16:38,540 but right now, uh, what happened 437 00:16:38,581 --> 00:16:42,127 with Derek, an emotional, impulsive, selfish boy-- 438 00:16:42,168 --> 00:16:45,505 - He's so special. 439 00:16:45,547 --> 00:16:50,218 - Uh, Grace, I was eavesdropping on your talk 440 00:16:50,260 --> 00:16:51,720 with Katie. - Dad, no. 441 00:16:51,761 --> 00:16:52,721 That's so uncool. 442 00:16:52,762 --> 00:16:53,763 Why would you do that? 443 00:16:53,805 --> 00:16:56,057 - Because I'm awful. 444 00:16:56,099 --> 00:17:00,103 I do foolish, ill-advised, impulsive things, 445 00:17:00,145 --> 00:17:02,480 even though at my age, I should know better. 446 00:17:02,522 --> 00:17:04,607 When my conscience tells me, "Hey, hey, Jim, 447 00:17:04,649 --> 00:17:07,027 don't do that," sometimes I actually say, 448 00:17:07,068 --> 00:17:09,237 "Hey, why don't you take a load off there, Mr. Conscience? 449 00:17:09,279 --> 00:17:12,490 Tonight I'm ride or die with Captain Id." 450 00:17:12,532 --> 00:17:16,161 And I regret it almost every single time. 451 00:17:16,202 --> 00:17:18,663 But--but be that as it may, 452 00:17:18,705 --> 00:17:22,375 I was so proud of what you told Katie to console her. 453 00:17:22,417 --> 00:17:25,128 It just-- it came out of you in seconds, 454 00:17:25,170 --> 00:17:27,630 because it's who you are, 455 00:17:27,672 --> 00:17:29,591 a good friend, a good person 456 00:17:29,632 --> 00:17:33,428 who now finds herself possibly smitten 457 00:17:33,470 --> 00:17:36,264 with a boy who dumped her friend 458 00:17:36,306 --> 00:17:38,266 and who lies to his parents 459 00:17:38,308 --> 00:17:41,186 and who Cirque du Soleil'd his way onto our balcony 460 00:17:41,227 --> 00:17:44,105 just to talk to you. 461 00:17:45,690 --> 00:17:48,526 What would you call behavior like that? 462 00:17:48,568 --> 00:17:49,527 - I don't know. 463 00:17:49,569 --> 00:17:51,863 You tell me, Dad. 464 00:17:51,905 --> 00:17:55,325 - Maybe it's just the act of someone who hasn't necessarily 465 00:17:55,367 --> 00:17:58,036 thought everything through, 466 00:17:58,078 --> 00:18:00,789 like you might want to right now. 467 00:18:00,830 --> 00:18:01,831 - [sighs] 468 00:18:01,873 --> 00:18:03,541 I'm so messed up. 469 00:18:03,583 --> 00:18:06,336 - Uh, pivotal moments always seem to pop up unannounced, 470 00:18:06,378 --> 00:18:09,339 like a zit on the morning of your prom. 471 00:18:09,381 --> 00:18:12,425 You look in the mirror, and you're like, "Oh, come on." 472 00:18:14,886 --> 00:18:16,638 You're at a crossroad. 473 00:18:16,680 --> 00:18:18,139 Or is it "crossroads"? 474 00:18:18,181 --> 00:18:19,516 - It's "crossroads." - Yeah. 475 00:18:19,557 --> 00:18:20,350 - Plural. 476 00:18:20,392 --> 00:18:21,768 - Two roads crossing. 477 00:18:21,810 --> 00:18:24,437 You can only take one. 478 00:18:24,479 --> 00:18:26,981 I'm going to text Derek and tell him I'm not interested. 479 00:18:27,023 --> 00:18:28,608 - Mm, good choice. 480 00:18:28,650 --> 00:18:32,070 Uh, only problem is, he does not have his phone. 481 00:18:32,112 --> 00:18:34,656 His phone is in a bush by the school. 482 00:18:34,698 --> 00:18:37,450 - Oh, so his parents can't track him on Life360? 483 00:18:37,492 --> 00:18:38,326 Smart. 484 00:18:38,368 --> 00:18:41,454 I've done that move. 485 00:18:41,496 --> 00:18:43,248 - What? 486 00:18:43,289 --> 00:18:45,125 - I'm an awful, selfish, impulsive person 487 00:18:45,166 --> 00:18:46,710 sometimes too. 488 00:18:46,751 --> 00:18:49,713 - You get that from me. 489 00:18:49,754 --> 00:18:51,464 - Should I send it now? 490 00:18:51,506 --> 00:18:55,385 - Maybe reread whatever you wrote a couple of times and-- 491 00:18:59,889 --> 00:19:03,643 - He can read it when he gets back to the bush. 492 00:19:03,685 --> 00:19:06,688 Oh, and I love you. 493 00:19:06,730 --> 00:19:08,857 Beyond love. 494 00:19:08,898 --> 00:19:10,817 - I love you too. 495 00:19:17,115 --> 00:19:20,452 - [whispers] Hey, you did got this. 496 00:19:23,705 --> 00:19:26,666 [upbeat music] 497 00:19:28,001 --> 00:19:30,211 - Ohh. 498 00:19:33,882 --> 00:19:35,675 - How you feeling, Bobby? 499 00:19:35,717 --> 00:19:37,635 - Stones out? 500 00:19:37,677 --> 00:19:39,596 [stones clattering] 501 00:19:39,637 --> 00:19:41,264 Criminy Dutch! 502 00:19:41,306 --> 00:19:42,974 I had all these stones inside me? 503 00:19:43,016 --> 00:19:44,059 - Mm-hmm. 504 00:19:44,100 --> 00:19:45,518 - I'm like a freaking quarry. 505 00:19:47,062 --> 00:19:49,230 Y--you're not going to tell anyone about this, right? 506 00:19:49,272 --> 00:19:50,815 - No, because if I do, 507 00:19:50,857 --> 00:19:52,650 they'd know that I lied about where I've been. 508 00:19:52,692 --> 00:19:55,320 - And the kids will know their grandfather's not the force 509 00:19:55,362 --> 00:19:57,489 of nature they think I am. 510 00:19:57,530 --> 00:19:59,908 But luckily, their mom is. 511 00:19:59,949 --> 00:20:01,576 - When I have to be. 512 00:20:01,618 --> 00:20:05,747 - Any time you need me to go with you to the OB/GYN thing, 513 00:20:05,789 --> 00:20:07,332 just say the word. 514 00:20:07,374 --> 00:20:08,750 - I will never say that word. 515 00:20:10,001 --> 00:20:11,461 - Sorry I was such a baby. 516 00:20:11,503 --> 00:20:13,213 - Ah, you were worse than a baby. 517 00:20:13,254 --> 00:20:15,965 You were a cowardly, candy-ass infant. 518 00:20:16,007 --> 00:20:19,344 - Congratulations, Mr. Kearney. 519 00:20:19,386 --> 00:20:22,597 Your urinary tract is as clear as a bell. 520 00:20:22,639 --> 00:20:26,643 Just try not to ring it for a couple of days. 521 00:20:26,685 --> 00:20:27,727 - Gotcha. 522 00:20:27,769 --> 00:20:28,937 So no "Golden Girls"? 523 00:20:28,978 --> 00:20:32,816 - That's correct. 524 00:20:32,857 --> 00:20:34,317 And sign this. 525 00:20:34,359 --> 00:20:36,403 And as much as we are all going to miss him, 526 00:20:36,444 --> 00:20:38,113 your dad will be good to go. 527 00:20:38,154 --> 00:20:40,323 - He's not-- 528 00:20:43,159 --> 00:20:45,286 Yes, of course. 529 00:20:45,328 --> 00:20:48,998 [upbeat music] 530 00:20:49,040 --> 00:20:50,458 You know what? 531 00:20:50,500 --> 00:20:51,751 Uh, why don't you count to 50, then come in? 532 00:20:51,793 --> 00:20:53,169 Otherwise, it'll look too suspicious. 533 00:20:53,211 --> 00:20:54,170 - Got it. 534 00:20:54,212 --> 00:20:56,214 - OK. 535 00:20:56,256 --> 00:20:57,298 - Hey, hon. - Hi, Mom. 536 00:20:57,340 --> 00:20:59,426 - Hey. - Hey, guys. 537 00:21:01,219 --> 00:21:02,470 - So what'd everyone do tonight? 538 00:21:02,512 --> 00:21:05,140 - I had a sleepover with Katie. 539 00:21:05,181 --> 00:21:06,474 - Does Katie know? 540 00:21:06,516 --> 00:21:07,600 - She crashed early. 541 00:21:07,642 --> 00:21:08,768 Long story. 542 00:21:08,810 --> 00:21:11,730 both: Sleepovers are the best. - [laughs] 543 00:21:11,771 --> 00:21:13,606 Everything OK with your work emergency? 544 00:21:13,648 --> 00:21:15,900 - Yeah. - It was good she was there. 545 00:21:15,942 --> 00:21:18,111 I mean, it's always good when she's anywhere. 546 00:21:18,153 --> 00:21:20,613 [chuckles] 547 00:21:20,655 --> 00:21:22,490 - Help us pick a show to watch. - OK. 548 00:21:22,532 --> 00:21:25,035 - Anything but "Golden Girls." 549 00:21:25,076 --> 00:21:26,745 [upbeat music] 550 00:21:26,786 --> 00:21:28,747 Oh, boy. - OK.