1 00:00:06,715 --> 00:00:07,090 . 2 00:00:07,132 --> 00:00:07,674 - What's the damage? 3 00:00:08,633 --> 00:00:09,718 - It's on the house. 4 00:00:09,759 --> 00:00:11,386 - Oh, Dad, I know business has been slow-- 5 00:00:11,428 --> 00:00:12,721 - $4.50. 6 00:00:14,889 --> 00:00:16,016 - Keep the change. 7 00:00:16,057 --> 00:00:17,183 - 50ยข? 8 00:00:17,225 --> 00:00:19,644 That's your tip? 9 00:00:19,686 --> 00:00:21,229 - Well, yeah, that's, like, 15%. 10 00:00:21,271 --> 00:00:23,648 - It's 11%. 11 00:00:23,690 --> 00:00:27,318 I'm glad I'm not stripping for you. 12 00:00:27,360 --> 00:00:29,738 I'd have to go home with change in my panties. 13 00:00:36,161 --> 00:00:37,287 Warmer. 14 00:00:45,295 --> 00:00:47,047 [bell clanging] 15 00:00:47,088 --> 00:00:49,424 Big tipper here! We got a big tipper! 16 00:00:51,217 --> 00:00:53,845 - * It's true * 17 00:00:53,887 --> 00:00:57,974 * The marriage that we once had now is through * 18 00:00:58,016 --> 00:01:01,978 * And now we're doing all that we can do * 19 00:01:02,020 --> 00:01:06,608 * To keep us all together as a crew * 20 00:01:06,649 --> 00:01:10,403 * Just do as we say, not as we do * 21 00:01:10,445 --> 00:01:14,407 * We really thought that we were done * 22 00:01:14,449 --> 00:01:16,785 * But we've just begun * 23 00:01:18,828 --> 00:01:20,163 [buzzer blares] 24 00:01:20,205 --> 00:01:21,748 - And that's 14 losses in a row 25 00:01:21,790 --> 00:01:24,918 for the Boston Celtics, a terrible losing streak. 26 00:01:24,959 --> 00:01:28,046 Trey Taylor, upset on the sideline. 27 00:01:28,088 --> 00:01:29,381 - Poor Trey. 28 00:01:29,422 --> 00:01:31,591 - Forget Trey. Look around! 29 00:01:31,633 --> 00:01:33,802 This losing streak is bad for my business. 30 00:01:33,843 --> 00:01:36,888 - Maybe if you had a TV that was made this century. 31 00:01:36,930 --> 00:01:38,348 - Who can afford a new TV? 32 00:01:38,390 --> 00:01:39,891 I'm thinking about selling the one I got. 33 00:01:39,933 --> 00:01:42,268 - Whoa, Dad, no one's gonna buy that old TV. 34 00:01:42,310 --> 00:01:44,938 - Hey, before you go. 35 00:01:44,979 --> 00:01:46,272 It's 50 bucks. 36 00:01:46,314 --> 00:01:47,816 Small dent, but it's something. 37 00:01:47,857 --> 00:01:51,152 - Oh, Dad, please, that-- that money wasn't a loan. 38 00:01:51,194 --> 00:01:52,612 It was a gift. I don't need it back. 39 00:01:52,654 --> 00:01:56,658 - Oh! You don't need three grand, Rockefeller? 40 00:01:56,700 --> 00:01:58,827 Must be nice. 41 00:01:58,868 --> 00:02:00,578 I've never been in debt in my life, 42 00:02:00,620 --> 00:02:02,163 and it's weighing on me. Just take it. 43 00:02:02,205 --> 00:02:03,623 - You sold your blood? 44 00:02:03,665 --> 00:02:06,084 - I donated, and they gave me money. 45 00:02:06,126 --> 00:02:08,503 - When you donate something and they give you money, 46 00:02:08,545 --> 00:02:11,589 that's called selling something. 47 00:02:11,631 --> 00:02:13,591 - What else am I gonna do with my blood? 48 00:02:13,633 --> 00:02:17,095 It's just swishing around in my arteries, doing nothing. 49 00:02:17,137 --> 00:02:18,805 - I'm not taking your literal blood money. 50 00:02:18,847 --> 00:02:21,474 - Take it. I wish my body made it faster, 51 00:02:21,516 --> 00:02:23,560 but I can get you more next week. 52 00:02:23,601 --> 00:02:24,978 - Things will turn around. 53 00:02:25,020 --> 00:02:27,272 I-if there's anything I can do, just say the word. 54 00:02:27,313 --> 00:02:29,899 - Now that you mention it, 55 00:02:29,941 --> 00:02:32,193 I need Trey to do me a favor. 56 00:02:32,235 --> 00:02:33,987 - Dad, we can't ask Trey for money. 57 00:02:34,029 --> 00:02:35,405 - I'm not asking for money. 58 00:02:35,447 --> 00:02:37,240 I need him to send a player over here 59 00:02:37,282 --> 00:02:39,325 for a meet and greet. 60 00:02:39,367 --> 00:02:41,786 You said, "Say the word." 61 00:02:41,828 --> 00:02:43,788 - Yeah, but I can't start asking Trey for favors. 62 00:02:43,830 --> 00:02:47,500 - You just now said, "Say the word." 63 00:02:47,542 --> 00:02:49,419 - I should have excluded the words 64 00:02:49,461 --> 00:02:50,628 "Trey," "favor," and "ask." 65 00:02:50,670 --> 00:02:52,505 - It'd be good for him too. 66 00:02:52,547 --> 00:02:55,800 He sends a player over, it creates community goodwill. 67 00:02:55,842 --> 00:02:57,135 It's a win-win. 68 00:02:57,177 --> 00:02:59,971 I'd ask him myself, but I can't go hat in hand. 69 00:03:00,013 --> 00:03:02,974 - But it's okay for me to go hat in hand? 70 00:03:03,016 --> 00:03:04,684 - It's not you asking. 71 00:03:04,726 --> 00:03:05,727 I'm asking. 72 00:03:05,769 --> 00:03:07,270 Just put the words in your mouth, 73 00:03:07,312 --> 00:03:08,688 you go over there, open your mouth, 74 00:03:08,730 --> 00:03:10,732 the words come out, and they're from me. 75 00:03:12,692 --> 00:03:13,985 - Let me think about it. I don't like 76 00:03:14,027 --> 00:03:16,029 mixing family with...family. 77 00:03:16,071 --> 00:03:17,572 - Hey, wait. 78 00:03:18,740 --> 00:03:21,117 That's 3 bucks towards the next 50. 79 00:03:21,159 --> 00:03:24,204 [upbeat rock music] 80 00:03:24,245 --> 00:03:25,705 - Grace, dinner's here! 81 00:03:25,747 --> 00:03:27,791 You're sure you won't stay for a slice? 82 00:03:27,832 --> 00:03:29,668 - Yeah, Dad, you can have some of mine. 83 00:03:29,709 --> 00:03:32,128 - Mm, thanks, but Dad's watching his tummy, 84 00:03:32,170 --> 00:03:34,714 and I'd rather not watch it explode. 85 00:03:34,756 --> 00:03:37,550 - Mom, I just beat these two at Monopoly so bad. 86 00:03:37,592 --> 00:03:39,302 At one point, Dad had to borrow money from me 87 00:03:39,344 --> 00:03:41,096 so he could pay me rent. - What? 88 00:03:41,137 --> 00:03:43,223 - Yes, your daughter's quite the loan shark. 89 00:03:43,264 --> 00:03:45,308 The vig is 20%. 90 00:03:45,350 --> 00:03:47,143 She now owns my blue cashmere sweater. 91 00:03:47,185 --> 00:03:49,813 - So soft. 92 00:03:49,854 --> 00:03:51,690 - When I couldn't pay rent on Marvin Gardens, 93 00:03:51,731 --> 00:03:53,608 she made me bark like a dog. 94 00:03:54,734 --> 00:03:56,611 - Please be kind to each other. 95 00:03:58,321 --> 00:04:00,281 - She's not the person you think she is. 96 00:04:00,323 --> 00:04:01,282 - Yes, I am. 97 00:04:01,324 --> 00:04:03,618 Sit, Jimmy. Sit. 98 00:04:03,660 --> 00:04:06,538 - So how's Trey holding up? 99 00:04:06,579 --> 00:04:07,706 - How do you mean? 100 00:04:07,747 --> 00:04:09,374 - Well, Celtics are in the toilet, 101 00:04:09,416 --> 00:04:12,627 and you consoling him has become a meme. 102 00:04:14,254 --> 00:04:15,588 - He's fine. 103 00:04:15,630 --> 00:04:16,965 You know, but when he gets here, 104 00:04:17,007 --> 00:04:19,259 let's try not to mention the team, okay? 105 00:04:19,300 --> 00:04:20,760 You know, don't say "Celtics," 106 00:04:20,802 --> 00:04:22,095 "basketball," "basket," or "ball." 107 00:04:22,137 --> 00:04:24,055 Don't say "lose," "lost," "losing," or "loss." 108 00:04:24,097 --> 00:04:26,224 Don't say "dog," "wallet," "keys," or "virginity"-- 109 00:04:26,266 --> 00:04:27,267 anything he's lost. 110 00:04:27,308 --> 00:04:28,435 [door closes] 111 00:04:28,476 --> 00:04:31,229 And don't give him any advice. 112 00:04:31,271 --> 00:04:34,441 - The coach has gotta work on basic skills with them. 113 00:04:34,482 --> 00:04:38,153 Shooting drills, passing drills, and conditioning. 114 00:04:38,194 --> 00:04:41,031 - Thank you, Jimmy, but they're all pretty fit. 115 00:04:41,072 --> 00:04:43,033 - Hey, why don't you just get all-new players? 116 00:04:45,535 --> 00:04:48,079 - I'll give that some thought, Grace. 117 00:04:48,121 --> 00:04:49,914 - Why don't you two be kind, go in the living room, 118 00:04:49,956 --> 00:04:51,624 be kind, finish your pizza, be kind. 119 00:04:53,126 --> 00:04:54,502 Hey, hon. - Hi, baby. 120 00:05:01,509 --> 00:05:03,845 - B-T-dubs, loving that beard, bro. 121 00:05:03,887 --> 00:05:06,348 - Thanks, homeslice. Um... 122 00:05:06,389 --> 00:05:08,975 but it's not for style. 123 00:05:09,017 --> 00:05:10,268 It's for good juju. 124 00:05:10,310 --> 00:05:12,979 So no shaving 125 00:05:13,021 --> 00:05:14,981 until we snap this losing streak. 126 00:05:15,023 --> 00:05:16,483 - I wouldn't get too worried about it. 127 00:05:16,524 --> 00:05:17,942 All teams have unlucky stretches. 128 00:05:17,984 --> 00:05:19,527 - And I've been praying every night 129 00:05:19,569 --> 00:05:20,737 that things will turn around. 130 00:05:20,779 --> 00:05:22,572 - Yeah, well, pray extra hard, 131 00:05:22,614 --> 00:05:24,908 because Boston's not happy. 132 00:05:24,949 --> 00:05:26,493 Today, I walked into Dunkin' Donuts, 133 00:05:26,534 --> 00:05:28,745 and they just said, "Nope." 134 00:05:29,954 --> 00:05:32,082 - That shirt is really good on you. 135 00:05:35,502 --> 00:05:36,628 - What do you want? 136 00:05:36,670 --> 00:05:37,921 - Look, you know that I have 137 00:05:37,962 --> 00:05:39,547 never asked you for anything before, 138 00:05:39,589 --> 00:05:41,675 even though I drove you home from your colonoscopy, 139 00:05:41,716 --> 00:05:44,010 which I was glad to do, you know, for you 140 00:05:44,052 --> 00:05:46,346 and your colon. 141 00:05:46,388 --> 00:05:47,347 - Spit it out, Jim. 142 00:05:47,389 --> 00:05:48,515 - Okay. 143 00:05:48,556 --> 00:05:50,141 Business has been slow at my dad's bar, 144 00:05:50,183 --> 00:05:52,102 so he wants you to send a player down 145 00:05:52,143 --> 00:05:55,105 for a meet and greet--but hey, it's a win for you too. 146 00:05:55,146 --> 00:05:57,691 Dad gets a Celtic, and you get community goodwill. 147 00:05:59,984 --> 00:06:02,821 Okay, it's in no way a win for you. 148 00:06:02,862 --> 00:06:05,407 The truth is, last month, I threw my dad 149 00:06:05,448 --> 00:06:06,741 a few grand to cover some bills. 150 00:06:06,783 --> 00:06:08,702 It was a gift, not a loan, 151 00:06:08,743 --> 00:06:10,370 but he insists on paying me back. 152 00:06:10,412 --> 00:06:11,705 It's--it's maddening. 153 00:06:11,746 --> 00:06:12,956 If we were Vikings, I would have 154 00:06:12,997 --> 00:06:14,457 pushed him off a cliff a long time ago. 155 00:06:15,875 --> 00:06:17,627 - Jim, I just don't have the bandwidth. 156 00:06:17,669 --> 00:06:19,713 - Look, my dad has been selling his blood. 157 00:06:19,754 --> 00:06:22,590 And I'm not sure how much blood he even has anymore. 158 00:06:24,300 --> 00:06:26,720 - All right, I guess I could send over Yuri Kobilska. 159 00:06:26,761 --> 00:06:29,723 - There's a Celtic named Kobilska? 160 00:06:29,764 --> 00:06:32,809 Does he come on a roll with mustard? 161 00:06:32,851 --> 00:06:34,936 - He's a new guy, Slovakian. 162 00:06:34,978 --> 00:06:36,312 I was gonna send him back to the G League, 163 00:06:36,354 --> 00:06:38,356 but you know what, I'll keep him one more week 164 00:06:38,398 --> 00:06:39,357 just for you. 165 00:06:39,399 --> 00:06:40,775 - For my dad. 166 00:06:40,817 --> 00:06:42,610 Uh, so his name again was Yuri... 167 00:06:42,652 --> 00:06:44,070 - Kobilska. 168 00:06:44,112 --> 00:06:45,572 - [spits] Done. 169 00:06:57,125 --> 00:06:57,542 . 170 00:06:57,584 --> 00:06:58,460 - That good beard juju kicked in. 171 00:06:59,586 --> 00:07:01,463 Kobilska's led us to eight straight wins. 172 00:07:01,504 --> 00:07:04,174 - Yet still no shaving. 173 00:07:04,215 --> 00:07:06,509 - Obviously, if I shave now, we'd lose again. 174 00:07:06,551 --> 00:07:08,845 I mean, that's Juju 101. 175 00:07:08,887 --> 00:07:11,056 - Syracuse didn't offer a degree in juju. 176 00:07:11,097 --> 00:07:12,557 [mellow rock music] 177 00:07:12,599 --> 00:07:14,392 - Yuri, you dominated tonight-- 178 00:07:14,434 --> 00:07:16,811 a triple-double, including 14 assists. 179 00:07:16,853 --> 00:07:18,772 - I think we played well as a team, 180 00:07:18,813 --> 00:07:22,025 but all glory goes to God. 181 00:07:22,067 --> 00:07:24,361 - So Yuri's coming. Dad's gonna have a big night. 182 00:07:24,402 --> 00:07:26,446 It's Linsanity all over again. 183 00:07:26,488 --> 00:07:28,740 - We market tested "Yur-insanity." 184 00:07:28,782 --> 00:07:30,909 It looked better on paper. 185 00:07:30,950 --> 00:07:37,040 * * 186 00:07:37,082 --> 00:07:38,708 We messed with the juju. 187 00:07:40,377 --> 00:07:41,753 - Honey, I'm sorry. 188 00:07:41,795 --> 00:07:44,589 I just wanted to kiss you without getting lacerations. 189 00:07:44,631 --> 00:07:46,549 - Can you not see there's a causal connection 190 00:07:46,591 --> 00:07:48,009 between us losing last night 191 00:07:48,051 --> 00:07:50,679 and me trimming my beard to now resemble an Amish elder? 192 00:07:52,639 --> 00:07:54,557 - Is that thy carriage parked outside? 193 00:07:54,599 --> 00:07:57,268 Because thy horse has pooped. 194 00:07:57,310 --> 00:07:58,520 - It's not funny. 195 00:07:58,561 --> 00:07:59,729 - What's the matter with him? 196 00:07:59,771 --> 00:08:01,731 - Trey thinks the Celtics lost last night 197 00:08:01,773 --> 00:08:03,108 because he trimmed his beard. 198 00:08:03,149 --> 00:08:05,819 - The juju's been disrupted. 199 00:08:05,860 --> 00:08:07,320 - Don't sweat it. It was one game. 200 00:08:07,362 --> 00:08:09,739 - If I would have just left the hair on my face alone, 201 00:08:09,781 --> 00:08:11,449 there was a clear path to a title. 202 00:08:11,491 --> 00:08:14,035 But no, you wanted a kiss. 203 00:08:16,121 --> 00:08:18,081 - I think we're gonna go. 204 00:08:18,123 --> 00:08:19,916 Um, come on, let's get you a donut. 205 00:08:19,958 --> 00:08:22,627 I'm buying. - You're gonna have to buy. 206 00:08:24,796 --> 00:08:26,965 - There's three grand. We're square. 207 00:08:27,007 --> 00:08:28,591 - Wow, you're-- you're pulling in that much? 208 00:08:28,633 --> 00:08:29,718 - Piece of cake! 209 00:08:29,759 --> 00:08:31,344 I got a $20 cover. 210 00:08:31,386 --> 00:08:32,721 Drinks cost double tonight. 211 00:08:32,762 --> 00:08:36,016 It's called dynamic pricing. 212 00:08:36,057 --> 00:08:39,185 You see, son, some people just have a natural business sense. 213 00:08:39,227 --> 00:08:41,604 No matter what ups and downs the economy takes, 214 00:08:41,646 --> 00:08:43,606 they can still turn a buck. 215 00:08:43,648 --> 00:08:45,734 And it happens to be the Kid. 216 00:08:48,236 --> 00:08:49,946 We got a problem. 217 00:08:51,698 --> 00:08:54,993 - Thank God you got that natural business sense, Kid. 218 00:08:55,035 --> 00:08:56,953 - Yuri won't come out of the walk-in cooler. 219 00:08:56,995 --> 00:08:58,913 If he thinks he's gonna get a piece of the action, 220 00:08:58,955 --> 00:09:00,331 he can forget it. - Whoa, whoa, Dad, Dad. 221 00:09:00,373 --> 00:09:02,125 I'll--I'll talk to him. - I'lltalk to him. 222 00:09:02,167 --> 00:09:05,003 I'm not afraid of some 6'3" Slovakian. 223 00:09:05,045 --> 00:09:06,421 - He's 6'11". 224 00:09:06,463 --> 00:09:09,132 - Better you go alone. 225 00:09:09,174 --> 00:09:12,135 * * 226 00:09:12,177 --> 00:09:14,304 - Oh. Hey, there. 227 00:09:14,346 --> 00:09:17,474 Um, hope I'm not interrupting. 228 00:09:17,515 --> 00:09:19,476 Uh, we haven't officially met. 229 00:09:19,517 --> 00:09:21,144 Uh, I'm Jim Kearney. 230 00:09:21,186 --> 00:09:22,979 My dad owns the bar. 231 00:09:23,021 --> 00:09:26,316 Uh, wonder if I could have a quick word with you, Yuri. 232 00:09:26,358 --> 00:09:27,942 Oh, may I call you Yuri? 233 00:09:31,029 --> 00:09:33,656 Your--your fans are really excited to see you. 234 00:09:33,698 --> 00:09:35,325 Uh, they--they love you. 235 00:09:35,367 --> 00:09:36,826 - When I score. 236 00:09:36,868 --> 00:09:39,120 But last night, I blow game. 237 00:09:39,162 --> 00:09:40,663 We lost because of me. 238 00:09:40,705 --> 00:09:42,499 I began to believe those who say, 239 00:09:42,540 --> 00:09:43,875 "Yuri is a baller. 240 00:09:43,917 --> 00:09:45,960 Yuri is the shizzle." 241 00:09:46,002 --> 00:09:47,629 And you see what happened? 242 00:09:47,671 --> 00:09:49,547 I let God down. 243 00:09:49,589 --> 00:09:51,883 - Oh, no, pfft. God's not let down. 244 00:09:51,925 --> 00:09:53,176 God's fine. [chuckles] 245 00:09:53,218 --> 00:09:54,803 God's got other stuff on his mind. 246 00:09:56,596 --> 00:09:58,473 - Before I come to America, 247 00:09:58,515 --> 00:10:00,767 I was studying to become a priest. 248 00:10:00,809 --> 00:10:03,019 But in the seminary intramural league, 249 00:10:03,061 --> 00:10:05,605 I discovered hidden ability to play. 250 00:10:05,647 --> 00:10:06,815 - Uh, I don't know about "hidden." 251 00:10:06,856 --> 00:10:08,775 Uh, you're very tall. 252 00:10:08,817 --> 00:10:11,403 - When I start to have success in NBA, 253 00:10:11,444 --> 00:10:13,488 I lose sight of God. 254 00:10:13,530 --> 00:10:15,031 I have failed. 255 00:10:15,073 --> 00:10:16,366 - Oh, no, no. 256 00:10:16,408 --> 00:10:18,243 You--you didn't fail. 257 00:10:18,284 --> 00:10:20,370 Look, you know, we all-- we all love the big guy. 258 00:10:20,412 --> 00:10:24,916 You know, uh, I mean, he-- he turned water into wine, 259 00:10:24,958 --> 00:10:26,668 and, uh... [strains] 260 00:10:26,710 --> 00:10:28,878 That whole parting of the Red Sea thing, 261 00:10:28,920 --> 00:10:32,632 that was, uh-- that was pretty cool. 262 00:10:32,674 --> 00:10:33,883 Um... 263 00:10:33,925 --> 00:10:36,636 uh, bubonic plague was a misstep. 264 00:10:38,179 --> 00:10:40,557 But he bounced back with the Matterhorn-- 265 00:10:40,598 --> 00:10:43,268 both the mountain and the ride. 266 00:10:43,309 --> 00:10:44,936 - God is so amazing. 267 00:10:44,978 --> 00:10:47,897 - Yes, and he gets plenty of praise and attention for it. 268 00:10:47,939 --> 00:10:50,442 Uh, uh, temples, mosques, churches, 269 00:10:50,483 --> 00:10:54,612 Chick-fil-A is closed on Sunday, all for him. 270 00:10:54,654 --> 00:10:56,072 And you honor him too. 271 00:10:56,114 --> 00:10:57,741 Uh, What do you say in your postgame interviews? 272 00:10:57,782 --> 00:10:59,034 - Glory goes to God. 273 00:10:59,075 --> 00:11:01,244 - Yeah, right. So what happens to you 274 00:11:01,286 --> 00:11:03,079 is part of God's plan. 275 00:11:03,121 --> 00:11:05,999 Those free throws you ganked the other night? 276 00:11:06,041 --> 00:11:08,293 That's on him, not you. 277 00:11:08,335 --> 00:11:10,295 - I never think like this way before. 278 00:11:10,337 --> 00:11:13,465 - Well, start thinking like this way, my friend. 279 00:11:13,506 --> 00:11:15,675 It's all a part of his plan. 280 00:11:15,717 --> 00:11:19,137 - You are very wise, Jim Kearney. 281 00:11:19,179 --> 00:11:21,348 Can we speak more about this sometime? 282 00:11:21,389 --> 00:11:22,891 - Uh, sure we can, out there, 283 00:11:22,932 --> 00:11:24,726 uh, after we meet, uh, and greet, 284 00:11:24,768 --> 00:11:26,478 which are, admittedly, the same thing. 285 00:11:26,519 --> 00:11:28,188 Um, so let's get you out there 286 00:11:28,229 --> 00:11:30,648 and meeting your adoring public. 287 00:11:30,690 --> 00:11:32,650 So--oh, oh, goodness. Okay. 288 00:11:32,692 --> 00:11:33,902 Um... 289 00:11:35,236 --> 00:11:38,156 - Even your head is like basketball. 290 00:11:38,198 --> 00:11:39,407 * * 291 00:11:39,449 --> 00:11:42,369 [crowd cheering] 292 00:11:47,374 --> 00:11:48,458 - Who's the Kid now? 293 00:11:48,500 --> 00:11:50,251 - Thank you, son. 294 00:11:53,004 --> 00:11:55,256 - Hey, Yuri, what happened last night? 295 00:11:55,298 --> 00:11:58,426 You were the opposite of clutch. 296 00:11:58,468 --> 00:11:59,844 - I do not like to lose, 297 00:11:59,886 --> 00:12:02,222 but sometimes losing is a part of God's plan. 298 00:12:02,263 --> 00:12:04,808 - But you bricked the two free throws. 299 00:12:04,849 --> 00:12:06,017 That would've made the difference. 300 00:12:06,059 --> 00:12:08,103 - Your math is correct. 301 00:12:08,144 --> 00:12:10,730 My intention is always to score. 302 00:12:10,772 --> 00:12:12,357 But once the ball leaves my hand, 303 00:12:12,399 --> 00:12:14,109 the outcome is not up to me. 304 00:12:14,150 --> 00:12:16,569 So if people do not like the outcome, 305 00:12:16,611 --> 00:12:18,655 people should not blame me. 306 00:12:18,697 --> 00:12:21,324 You should blame God. 307 00:12:31,835 --> 00:12:32,002 . 308 00:12:32,043 --> 00:12:33,044 - Oof! Another Monopoly beatdown, Jimmy. 309 00:12:34,129 --> 00:12:36,047 Pennsylvania Avenue with three houses? 310 00:12:36,089 --> 00:12:38,133 [clicks tongue] Next game, you're gonna owe me a thousand. 311 00:12:38,174 --> 00:12:40,844 - Dad, tell her debts don't carry over to the next game. 312 00:12:40,885 --> 00:12:42,971 - Well, yes, they do. 313 00:12:43,013 --> 00:12:44,806 Unless-- - I'm not barking. 314 00:12:44,848 --> 00:12:46,307 - Jimmy, you're my brother. 315 00:12:46,349 --> 00:12:47,934 I wouldn't make you bark. 316 00:12:47,976 --> 00:12:49,310 Can you roll over? 317 00:12:49,352 --> 00:12:50,395 - Mom. 318 00:12:51,896 --> 00:12:53,857 - Kids, be kind to each other. 319 00:12:53,898 --> 00:12:56,818 One day, your father and I will be dead. 320 00:12:56,860 --> 00:12:59,362 - Such a lovely thought. 321 00:12:59,404 --> 00:13:02,782 - Might we grab you for a little confab in the kitchen? 322 00:13:02,824 --> 00:13:04,451 - Okay, I'll take what money you got, 323 00:13:04,492 --> 00:13:05,618 plus you have to roll over. 324 00:13:05,660 --> 00:13:06,661 - I'm not doing it. - [scoffs] 325 00:13:06,703 --> 00:13:08,079 [baby voice] Who's a good boy? 326 00:13:08,121 --> 00:13:09,664 - Stop. - Who's a good boy? 327 00:13:09,706 --> 00:13:11,499 - I need to have a word with you, bro. 328 00:13:11,541 --> 00:13:13,460 - Why is he looking at me like something is my fault? 329 00:13:13,501 --> 00:13:15,462 - Because something is your fault, Jim. 330 00:13:15,503 --> 00:13:18,423 - Word has gotten out about Mr. Kobilska's comments 331 00:13:18,465 --> 00:13:21,134 last night, and there have been some feelings. 332 00:13:21,176 --> 00:13:23,511 - They're not positive feelings, Jim. 333 00:13:23,553 --> 00:13:26,556 - People are not happy that Yuri threw God under the bus. 334 00:13:26,598 --> 00:13:29,517 - God is already under the bus. 335 00:13:29,559 --> 00:13:30,977 He's everywhere. 336 00:13:33,229 --> 00:13:35,648 - People are protesting outside of TD Garden. 337 00:13:35,690 --> 00:13:37,692 - Who the hell is protesting? - People who believe 338 00:13:37,734 --> 00:13:38,860 that God has been insulted-- 339 00:13:38,902 --> 00:13:40,945 and there's a lot of them. 340 00:13:40,987 --> 00:13:42,364 - Well, this is America. 341 00:13:42,405 --> 00:13:44,324 People are entitled to their religious beliefs, 342 00:13:44,366 --> 00:13:45,825 but that stuff has nothing to do with me. 343 00:13:45,867 --> 00:13:47,827 - Oh, really? 344 00:13:47,869 --> 00:13:50,038 Because an hour ago, I asked Mr. Kobilska 345 00:13:50,080 --> 00:13:51,456 how he arrived at the conclusion 346 00:13:51,498 --> 00:13:54,209 that the Lord Almighty is somehow to blame 347 00:13:54,250 --> 00:13:55,877 for his laughable free throw skills... 348 00:13:55,919 --> 00:13:57,462 - And guess what he said? 349 00:13:57,504 --> 00:14:00,382 - "I really should practice my free throws"? 350 00:14:00,423 --> 00:14:02,467 - No, he said he received guidance 351 00:14:02,509 --> 00:14:05,053 from his spiritual advisor. 352 00:14:05,095 --> 00:14:06,471 - I was just trying to get him out of the cooler. 353 00:14:06,513 --> 00:14:08,390 - I should have never agreed to send Yuri! 354 00:14:08,431 --> 00:14:11,393 - You only kept Yuri because I asked for the favor. 355 00:14:11,434 --> 00:14:12,435 Ha! - Ha? 356 00:14:12,477 --> 00:14:14,062 You don't get to "ha" him! 357 00:14:14,104 --> 00:14:16,690 - I'm gonna need to re-borrow. 358 00:14:16,731 --> 00:14:18,066 - Where the hell did you come from? 359 00:14:18,108 --> 00:14:19,651 - From my God-blaming bar, 360 00:14:19,693 --> 00:14:21,069 where people are demanding refunds. 361 00:14:21,111 --> 00:14:22,404 - Refunds? For what? 362 00:14:22,445 --> 00:14:23,988 - That's what I said. 363 00:14:24,030 --> 00:14:26,825 I told 'em, no way I'm paying for beers they already drank. 364 00:14:26,866 --> 00:14:28,910 They threatened to set fire to the building. 365 00:14:28,952 --> 00:14:31,496 So we compromised, and I gave 'em refunds. 366 00:14:31,538 --> 00:14:33,206 I had no choice! 367 00:14:33,248 --> 00:14:35,542 All because this guy's star player 368 00:14:35,583 --> 00:14:38,003 is a God-blaming blasphemer! 369 00:14:39,254 --> 00:14:40,797 - I told Yuri you'd want to counsel him 370 00:14:40,839 --> 00:14:42,424 in his time of strife. - Uh, I'm having 371 00:14:42,465 --> 00:14:44,426 my own time of strife. 372 00:14:44,467 --> 00:14:47,012 I do not want to be repaid, Dad. 373 00:14:47,053 --> 00:14:48,847 You're not allowed to repay me. 374 00:14:48,888 --> 00:14:53,226 - If I have to sell a kidney, you'll get every penny back. 375 00:14:53,268 --> 00:14:57,647 - Nobody wants your 71-year-old kidneys. 376 00:14:57,689 --> 00:15:01,359 - You wish your pee stream was as strong as mine. 377 00:15:01,401 --> 00:15:04,988 I'll put a frozen rope into that sink from right here! 378 00:15:08,575 --> 00:15:10,535 - Please don't. 379 00:15:10,577 --> 00:15:11,953 [doorbell rings] 380 00:15:11,995 --> 00:15:14,372 - All right, Jim, you're up. 381 00:15:14,414 --> 00:15:15,957 - He's here? Why is he here? 382 00:15:15,999 --> 00:15:17,876 - Because there are people protesting 383 00:15:17,917 --> 00:15:20,253 outside of TD Garden! 384 00:15:21,671 --> 00:15:22,964 - What am I supposed to say? 385 00:15:23,006 --> 00:15:24,299 - Oh, bestow your wisdom 386 00:15:24,341 --> 00:15:26,426 about the nature of God and the universe. 387 00:15:26,468 --> 00:15:27,719 - I know next to nothing 388 00:15:27,761 --> 00:15:29,304 about the nature of God and the universe. 389 00:15:29,346 --> 00:15:30,388 I'm a layman. 390 00:15:30,430 --> 00:15:32,265 - Jim, this is impacting Trey's business, 391 00:15:32,307 --> 00:15:34,100 all because your father can't accept your generosity 392 00:15:34,142 --> 00:15:36,436 like a normal human being! 393 00:15:36,478 --> 00:15:39,689 - I'm not gonna take money from my own son! 394 00:15:39,731 --> 00:15:42,233 Well, except this check. 395 00:15:42,275 --> 00:15:43,735 - Listen up, Reverend Jim. 396 00:15:43,777 --> 00:15:46,654 You asked for the favor, and you are going to fix this! 397 00:15:46,696 --> 00:15:47,989 - All right. Here we go. 398 00:15:48,031 --> 00:15:49,324 - Well, well, well. 399 00:15:49,366 --> 00:15:51,743 If it isn't the human hand grenade. 400 00:15:51,785 --> 00:15:53,078 - Not helpful, Dad. 401 00:15:53,119 --> 00:15:55,288 - Mr. Taylor said you wanted to talk to me. 402 00:15:55,330 --> 00:15:57,832 - Yeah. Yeah, I--I-- 403 00:15:57,874 --> 00:16:00,960 I think you may have taken something I said yesterday 404 00:16:01,002 --> 00:16:02,003 the wrong way. 405 00:16:02,045 --> 00:16:03,838 - No, I understand completely. 406 00:16:03,880 --> 00:16:05,590 Your message is so simple: 407 00:16:05,632 --> 00:16:07,801 God has a plan. 408 00:16:07,842 --> 00:16:11,930 - Jim, why don't you illuminate us and Mr. Kobilska 409 00:16:11,971 --> 00:16:14,307 about the concept of free will 410 00:16:14,349 --> 00:16:18,144 and how it fits within God's plan? 411 00:16:18,186 --> 00:16:21,773 - Yuri, my clumsy inarticulations 412 00:16:21,815 --> 00:16:25,318 have, uh, led you astray... 413 00:16:25,360 --> 00:16:27,028 my son. 414 00:16:27,070 --> 00:16:29,864 Uh, and as a--a good shepherd, 415 00:16:29,906 --> 00:16:32,909 uh, who tends his flock, 416 00:16:32,951 --> 00:16:35,370 I must bring you back into the-- 417 00:16:35,412 --> 00:16:36,371 - Herd. 418 00:16:39,749 --> 00:16:41,960 - Flock. 419 00:16:46,089 --> 00:16:49,259 Each sheep, uh, grows wool, 420 00:16:49,300 --> 00:16:54,889 uh, for-- for making socks and, uh... 421 00:16:54,931 --> 00:16:56,933 - Mittens. - Yes, mittens. 422 00:16:56,975 --> 00:16:58,476 - People need mittens. - Yes. 423 00:16:58,518 --> 00:17:01,646 Uh, and sometimes you--you give your mittens to someone-- 424 00:17:01,688 --> 00:17:03,565 a family member, perhaps-- 425 00:17:03,606 --> 00:17:06,568 and they think they need to give you those mittens back, 426 00:17:06,609 --> 00:17:09,112 even though you repeatedly-- repeatedly-- 427 00:17:09,154 --> 00:17:12,532 tell them you do not want them back. 428 00:17:12,574 --> 00:17:16,953 So you, uh, ask someone who has, uh, an extra sheep 429 00:17:16,995 --> 00:17:19,789 to--to loan you a--a sheep, 430 00:17:19,831 --> 00:17:23,043 uh, so that the aforementioned family member 431 00:17:23,084 --> 00:17:25,962 can gather their own wool, 432 00:17:26,004 --> 00:17:30,550 so they can make their own mittens. 433 00:17:30,592 --> 00:17:34,763 - So we need you, Yuri, to clarify... 434 00:17:34,804 --> 00:17:35,930 - That when you play poorly... 435 00:17:35,972 --> 00:17:37,265 - It's not God's fault. 436 00:17:37,307 --> 00:17:40,226 Does that make sense? - Not really. 437 00:17:40,268 --> 00:17:42,187 - Pray on it, and it will. 438 00:17:42,228 --> 00:17:45,273 - Job 36:11, "If they hear and serve him, 439 00:17:45,315 --> 00:17:47,984 "they will end their days in prosperity 440 00:17:48,026 --> 00:17:49,694 and their years in pleasures." 441 00:17:49,736 --> 00:17:51,071 - I love that one. 442 00:17:51,112 --> 00:17:53,782 - 12 years of Catholic school. [chuckles] 443 00:17:59,245 --> 00:17:59,412 . 444 00:17:59,454 --> 00:18:00,038 [mellow rock music] 445 00:18:01,289 --> 00:18:02,457 - Trey will go first. 446 00:18:02,499 --> 00:18:03,958 A quick statement on behalf of the team, 447 00:18:04,000 --> 00:18:05,502 and then throw it to Mr. Kobilska. 448 00:18:05,543 --> 00:18:07,754 Just read the statement exactly as I wrote it, 449 00:18:07,796 --> 00:18:09,005 and everything will be fine. 450 00:18:09,047 --> 00:18:11,424 - I'm quite nervous. 451 00:18:11,466 --> 00:18:13,551 - I'd like to offer a few words to my disciple-- 452 00:18:13,593 --> 00:18:15,553 - No, no, no. 453 00:18:15,595 --> 00:18:17,889 You--I think you've said enough, all right? 454 00:18:17,931 --> 00:18:20,392 You're gonna be fine. This is just a clarification. 455 00:18:20,433 --> 00:18:22,560 That's all-- to finish what you started. 456 00:18:24,187 --> 00:18:25,355 - All right. Go get 'em. 457 00:18:25,397 --> 00:18:26,981 - Hey, how's everybody doing? 458 00:18:27,023 --> 00:18:28,733 Thank you for coming out. 459 00:18:28,775 --> 00:18:31,611 Um, good afternoon. 460 00:18:31,653 --> 00:18:34,572 While the Celtics organization respects religious freedom, 461 00:18:34,614 --> 00:18:37,575 we recognize that there are appropriate times 462 00:18:37,617 --> 00:18:39,411 for its expression. 463 00:18:39,452 --> 00:18:42,580 To that end, Mr. Kobilska has, uh, prepared a statement. 464 00:18:42,622 --> 00:18:45,667 - [clears throat] I wish to apologize 465 00:18:45,709 --> 00:18:48,837 for any offense I have caused to the people of Boston, 466 00:18:48,878 --> 00:18:51,297 America, and around the world. 467 00:18:51,339 --> 00:18:54,968 My intention was never to-- 468 00:19:01,975 --> 00:19:04,436 I believe God has a plan. 469 00:19:04,477 --> 00:19:06,438 But up until a few moments ago, 470 00:19:06,479 --> 00:19:09,357 I was uncertain of my part in it. 471 00:19:09,399 --> 00:19:12,110 Then my wise employer, Mr. Taylor, 472 00:19:12,152 --> 00:19:15,655 counseled me to finish what I started. 473 00:19:15,697 --> 00:19:19,617 I believe his message is a message from God. 474 00:19:19,659 --> 00:19:23,079 So today, I am resigning from the Celtics 475 00:19:23,121 --> 00:19:27,292 to return to Slovakia to finish my studies in the seminary. 476 00:19:27,334 --> 00:19:29,669 I wish to thank the Celtics organization 477 00:19:29,711 --> 00:19:31,713 for the opportunity to play. 478 00:19:31,755 --> 00:19:33,298 Glory to God. 479 00:19:33,340 --> 00:19:35,967 [reporters clamoring] 480 00:19:36,009 --> 00:19:39,095 - Man, you really got to watch what you say to this guy. 481 00:19:39,137 --> 00:19:42,057 * * 482 00:19:42,098 --> 00:19:43,850 [buzzer blares] 483 00:19:43,892 --> 00:19:45,060 - And that'll do it. 484 00:19:45,101 --> 00:19:47,812 Miami Heat, 123; Celtics, 102. 485 00:19:47,854 --> 00:19:49,939 And the boys in green have once again found themselves 486 00:19:49,981 --> 00:19:52,609 in the middle of an embarrassing losing streak. 487 00:19:52,650 --> 00:19:56,029 Dear God, could the Celtics have used Kobilska tonight. 488 00:19:57,155 --> 00:19:58,782 - There's another 100-- 489 00:19:58,823 --> 00:20:00,367 50 from donating blood, 490 00:20:00,408 --> 00:20:03,828 and another 50 from donating more blood. 491 00:20:03,870 --> 00:20:07,832 I found a workaround, and I gave him a fake ID. 492 00:20:07,874 --> 00:20:09,459 - Okay, we gotta talk about this. 493 00:20:09,501 --> 00:20:12,128 This whole money thing never should've even been a thing. 494 00:20:12,170 --> 00:20:14,047 You know, and it somehow became another thing 495 00:20:14,089 --> 00:20:15,840 that really complicated a bigger thing, 496 00:20:15,882 --> 00:20:18,385 and that was not fun. 497 00:20:18,426 --> 00:20:20,220 Dad, I gave you that money because you're my father, 498 00:20:20,261 --> 00:20:22,514 and what's mine is yours. 499 00:20:22,555 --> 00:20:25,225 Okay. This is a list of all the times 500 00:20:25,266 --> 00:20:27,394 that you paid for stuff that you didn't need to. 501 00:20:29,062 --> 00:20:30,689 - Senior prom, 80; 502 00:20:30,730 --> 00:20:32,148 new snow tires, 250; 503 00:20:32,190 --> 00:20:34,818 parking tickets, 150. 504 00:20:34,859 --> 00:20:36,986 This adds up to three grand? 505 00:20:37,028 --> 00:20:39,322 - On the nose. 506 00:20:39,364 --> 00:20:42,283 - You're a good son. 507 00:20:42,325 --> 00:20:45,203 Three-card monte, 100 bucks? - [chuckles] 508 00:20:45,245 --> 00:20:48,498 - I thought it was 250. 509 00:20:48,540 --> 00:20:50,792 - Pretty sure it was a-- a flat hundred. 510 00:20:50,834 --> 00:20:53,628 Anyway, I just wanted to square our books. 511 00:20:53,670 --> 00:20:56,256 - It was 250. 512 00:20:58,049 --> 00:21:01,052 - Um, well, I'm--I'm saying, you owe me nothing, so... 513 00:21:01,094 --> 00:21:02,887 - That loan I floated you in college, 514 00:21:02,929 --> 00:21:05,098 that was 700, not 500. 515 00:21:06,933 --> 00:21:10,270 - Huh. Memory's a-- a funny thing, isn't it? 516 00:21:10,311 --> 00:21:12,230 So let's just say we're square. 517 00:21:12,272 --> 00:21:13,565 - [chuckles] 518 00:21:13,606 --> 00:21:16,735 That there is an amended total. 519 00:21:16,776 --> 00:21:17,736 - This looks like-- 520 00:21:17,777 --> 00:21:20,488 - You owe me 2,110. 521 00:21:22,449 --> 00:21:24,284 - What? - I don't need it right away. 522 00:21:24,325 --> 00:21:26,619 End of the month is fine. 523 00:21:26,661 --> 00:21:28,663 * *