1 00:00:01,894 --> 00:00:03,836 [Bobby Pickett's "Monster Mash"] 2 00:00:03,912 --> 00:00:06,230 [all cheering] 3 00:00:06,232 --> 00:00:08,232 - ♪ Four Barbaritas for la mesa ♪ 4 00:00:08,234 --> 00:00:10,083 That's "table" in Spanish. - All right. 5 00:00:10,236 --> 00:00:12,753 - ♪ It's time to get this fiesta started, ladies ♪ 6 00:00:12,905 --> 00:00:14,329 - It hasn't already started? 7 00:00:14,331 --> 00:00:16,998 We've yelled "woo" like five times. 8 00:00:17,018 --> 00:00:19,018 OK. I do love a pink drink. 9 00:00:19,094 --> 00:00:21,245 Reminds me of middle school. 10 00:00:21,247 --> 00:00:22,095 - I too love a fancy drink. 11 00:00:22,172 --> 00:00:23,522 And I hate to be a party pooper, 12 00:00:23,673 --> 00:00:26,083 but I need to take photos of Nan's house for the website 13 00:00:26,101 --> 00:00:27,251 before the sun goes down. 14 00:00:27,269 --> 00:00:29,010 You know? Play hard, work harder. 15 00:00:29,088 --> 00:00:30,029 Right, boss? 16 00:00:30,105 --> 00:00:31,846 - Who are you calling boss? [laughs] 17 00:00:31,924 --> 00:00:33,866 I'm off the clock, and so are you. 18 00:00:33,942 --> 00:00:34,808 You can take the pictures tomorrow. 19 00:00:34,960 --> 00:00:36,851 It's spooky night. 20 00:00:36,904 --> 00:00:38,428 What is spooky night? 21 00:00:38,447 --> 00:00:40,097 It's something that I used to do with my girlfriends, 22 00:00:40,099 --> 00:00:41,948 AKA "The Coven" back in the Pomp 23 00:00:42,101 --> 00:00:43,525 to get in the spirit of Halloween. 24 00:00:43,544 --> 00:00:45,936 Now I'm doing it with my new girlfriends here in Flatch. 25 00:00:45,938 --> 00:00:47,379 First thing we did-- 26 00:00:47,531 --> 00:00:49,456 witchy manicures. 27 00:00:49,608 --> 00:00:51,383 [growls] 28 00:00:51,460 --> 00:00:54,261 - Spooky gals. 29 00:00:58,467 --> 00:01:00,450 Poo gas. 30 00:01:00,452 --> 00:01:03,287 - I asked for something natural and low-key and got these. 31 00:01:03,305 --> 00:01:06,732 [chuckles] Still having lots of fun, though. 32 00:01:06,809 --> 00:01:08,125 all: To spooky night! 33 00:01:08,143 --> 00:01:10,127 - Woo! - Yes, witch! 34 00:01:10,145 --> 00:01:11,628 - [chuckles] - Mm-mm. 35 00:01:11,647 --> 00:01:12,963 - Just trying it out. 36 00:01:12,965 --> 00:01:14,648 - Spooky night is awesome. 37 00:01:14,800 --> 00:01:16,909 I mean, it's so fun hanging out with Barb outside work. 38 00:01:17,060 --> 00:01:18,635 She's so cool and fun. 39 00:01:18,637 --> 00:01:21,972 Did you hear when she was like, "Who you calling boss?" 40 00:01:21,990 --> 00:01:23,307 I think if I play my cards right, 41 00:01:23,325 --> 00:01:25,084 we could be like, best friends. 42 00:01:25,235 --> 00:01:28,903 And like, I've never had one of those other than Shrub. 43 00:01:28,981 --> 00:01:31,481 Oh, my God. He'd be so--bestie-rita. 44 00:01:31,483 --> 00:01:33,834 I just made that up. I gotta go tell Barb. 45 00:01:33,928 --> 00:01:35,836 - Who is that? 46 00:01:35,930 --> 00:01:37,245 - Oh, that's Rick. 47 00:01:37,323 --> 00:01:39,156 But everybody calls him the Hot Hermit 48 00:01:39,174 --> 00:01:41,416 'cause he lives off the grid and he's hot. 49 00:01:41,435 --> 00:01:42,993 - Yeah, he is. 50 00:01:43,011 --> 00:01:43,994 He's like one of the hottest men 51 00:01:44,087 --> 00:01:45,771 I've ever seen in my life, and I-- 52 00:01:45,848 --> 00:01:46,921 I was a judge at the Mr. Pompano 53 00:01:46,941 --> 00:01:48,849 Beach apron-only grilling competition. 54 00:01:49,001 --> 00:01:50,167 - Enjoy. 55 00:01:50,185 --> 00:01:52,185 - Did Hot Hermit just pay in soup? 56 00:01:52,338 --> 00:01:53,503 - Bone broth. 57 00:01:53,597 --> 00:01:55,856 He's a live-off-the-land type, but he comes in 58 00:01:55,932 --> 00:01:57,783 once a week to buy Fruity Pebbles. 59 00:01:57,860 --> 00:01:59,934 - Mm. - Kay. 60 00:01:59,954 --> 00:02:01,845 OK. That's it. 61 00:02:01,864 --> 00:02:02,979 I'm putting it out there. 62 00:02:03,015 --> 00:02:04,289 I want a new man. 63 00:02:04,366 --> 00:02:06,700 It's time to get over Bert and hop under a hermit. 64 00:02:06,852 --> 00:02:08,460 [car horn honks] 65 00:02:10,022 --> 00:02:11,188 - [screams] [both scream] 66 00:02:11,206 --> 00:02:13,023 So for Halloween this year, me, Beth, 67 00:02:13,041 --> 00:02:15,359 and Mickey are actually doing a throuple costume, 68 00:02:15,361 --> 00:02:16,526 which at first I really was not excited about. 69 00:02:16,545 --> 00:02:19,471 But then I thought about it, and it turns out 70 00:02:19,623 --> 00:02:21,306 that there's actually a ton of really cool costumes 71 00:02:21,458 --> 00:02:23,425 that you can only do with three people. 72 00:02:23,535 --> 00:02:26,145 You know, like Bella, Edward, Jacob. 73 00:02:26,221 --> 00:02:29,389 Plug, socket, surge protector. 74 00:02:29,541 --> 00:02:30,315 Rock, paper-- 75 00:02:30,392 --> 00:02:30,983 - Cowgirl. 76 00:02:31,134 --> 00:02:33,543 So you two are my horse. 77 00:02:33,562 --> 00:02:35,154 - When was this decided? 78 00:02:35,381 --> 00:02:38,215 - I think it was when my dad let us use the jacuzzi. 79 00:02:38,233 --> 00:02:40,993 - Wait, you guys were in a Jacuzzi together without me? 80 00:02:41,069 --> 00:02:43,144 - So I'm the cowgirl, 81 00:02:43,164 --> 00:02:44,888 and Mickey's the front of the horse, and you're the back. 82 00:02:44,907 --> 00:02:47,315 - Uh, you mean the butt. [chuckles] Um... 83 00:02:47,334 --> 00:02:48,558 Right. 84 00:02:48,577 --> 00:02:50,060 Well, what if Mickey is the butt actually? 85 00:02:50,078 --> 00:02:52,412 'Cause he has an amazing rump. 86 00:02:52,414 --> 00:02:54,398 - Well, thank you, but think about the optics of 87 00:02:54,416 --> 00:02:56,008 a Black man being the butt of a horse. 88 00:02:56,201 --> 00:02:57,659 Not the message that we want to send. 89 00:02:57,678 --> 00:02:58,844 - [sighs] 90 00:02:58,995 --> 00:03:01,663 - Here, horsey. - Oh, thank you. 91 00:03:01,740 --> 00:03:05,142 I'd give you some, but your part doesn't have a face. 92 00:03:10,933 --> 00:03:12,173 - I love Halloween. 93 00:03:12,251 --> 00:03:14,359 It's one of my favorite holidays. 94 00:03:14,511 --> 00:03:17,938 All the candy, and the pumpkin-themed stuff, 95 00:03:18,090 --> 00:03:19,756 all the scares. 96 00:03:19,758 --> 00:03:21,107 [screams] [laughs] 97 00:03:21,184 --> 00:03:23,685 And I found all my old A-Men stuff. 98 00:03:23,762 --> 00:03:25,762 A lot of memories in here. 99 00:03:25,764 --> 00:03:28,598 A lot of panties, too. 100 00:03:28,600 --> 00:03:32,285 Christian Teen Idol and all, it was huge in Germany. 101 00:03:32,438 --> 00:03:33,103 Yeah. 102 00:03:33,105 --> 00:03:34,788 I was, uh, very good for 103 00:03:34,882 --> 00:03:36,882 the unmentionables industry. 104 00:03:36,959 --> 00:03:38,625 [chuckles] 105 00:03:38,777 --> 00:03:39,885 Oh, yeah. 106 00:03:39,962 --> 00:03:41,795 I remember that show. 107 00:03:41,947 --> 00:03:43,296 - So much fun, guys. 108 00:03:43,373 --> 00:03:47,709 So now for the best part of spooky night, a psychic. 109 00:03:47,728 --> 00:03:49,061 - Oh, yeah. I'm out. 110 00:03:49,212 --> 00:03:50,971 I don't--I don't do psychics. 111 00:03:51,047 --> 00:03:52,397 - What? - Oh, come on, Mandy. 112 00:03:52,474 --> 00:03:54,808 Psychics aren't real. - [sighs] No. 113 00:03:54,960 --> 00:03:56,068 I don't mess with psychics. 114 00:03:56,219 --> 00:03:58,795 Plus I saw that guy at the drugstore. 115 00:03:58,814 --> 00:04:02,148 Dude tries on the Chapsticks and then puts them back. 116 00:04:02,301 --> 00:04:04,317 That's pervert behavior. 117 00:04:04,470 --> 00:04:06,653 - I'm going to ask who my next lover is going to be 118 00:04:06,805 --> 00:04:08,655 because, honey, it is time. 119 00:04:08,732 --> 00:04:10,415 - Honey, it is time. 120 00:04:10,567 --> 00:04:12,142 [smooches] 121 00:04:12,144 --> 00:04:13,568 I'll leave that honey stuff to you. 122 00:04:13,645 --> 00:04:17,147 - Girl, it is time for you to get back on that horse. 123 00:04:17,165 --> 00:04:19,332 - Yeah, it is. [chuckles] 124 00:04:19,409 --> 00:04:21,242 - I'm seeing that your next big love is going to be 125 00:04:21,262 --> 00:04:24,429 someone sexy but a little bit spicy. 126 00:04:24,656 --> 00:04:27,099 - Ooh. I like spicy. - But not your usual type. 127 00:04:27,250 --> 00:04:28,750 - That's really good because Bert was my type, 128 00:04:28,769 --> 00:04:32,253 and apparently the entire brokerage is as well. 129 00:04:32,273 --> 00:04:34,472 So when--when am I going to meet this person? 130 00:04:34,625 --> 00:04:36,016 - Soon. - Oh, OK. 131 00:04:36,168 --> 00:04:39,836 - But keep an eye out for someone unexpected. 132 00:04:39,838 --> 00:04:41,262 - Oh, my God. OK. 133 00:04:41,282 --> 00:04:42,188 This is good. This is good. 134 00:04:42,341 --> 00:04:43,523 - But buckle up-- - What? 135 00:04:43,600 --> 00:04:44,932 - Because it's going to be intense. 136 00:04:44,952 --> 00:04:46,934 - [groans] God. OK. 137 00:04:47,012 --> 00:04:48,011 [chuckles] Thank you. 138 00:04:48,104 --> 00:04:49,529 - Your turn, babe. 139 00:04:49,681 --> 00:04:50,864 - Thanks, babe. 140 00:04:50,940 --> 00:04:51,939 [retches] I don't-- I don't say "babe." 141 00:04:51,959 --> 00:04:53,199 - Ooh. Ooh. 142 00:04:53,352 --> 00:04:54,442 Oh, my. 143 00:04:54,461 --> 00:04:56,628 You're going to be like extremely frightened 144 00:04:56,780 --> 00:04:58,297 really soon. 145 00:04:58,448 --> 00:04:59,614 - No. 146 00:04:59,691 --> 00:05:00,690 That's not possible. 147 00:05:00,709 --> 00:05:01,875 I literally don't get scared. 148 00:05:01,951 --> 00:05:03,318 I saw "The Exorcist" when I was four, 149 00:05:03,378 --> 00:05:06,305 and I went home and slept like a baby, 'cause I was one. 150 00:05:06,532 --> 00:05:08,381 - I'm telling you you're going to be terrified. 151 00:05:08,458 --> 00:05:10,200 - And I'm telling you I need to get you a mic. 152 00:05:10,202 --> 00:05:12,218 You're a comedian. - Ow. 153 00:05:12,371 --> 00:05:13,053 - Sorry. 154 00:05:13,205 --> 00:05:16,523 - And last but not least... 155 00:05:18,319 --> 00:05:19,985 Oh, OK. 156 00:05:20,062 --> 00:05:21,969 [chuckles] Not what I was expecting. 157 00:05:21,989 --> 00:05:24,214 Glam in the front, granola in the back. 158 00:05:24,307 --> 00:05:26,049 I see you, miss mullet. 159 00:05:26,051 --> 00:05:27,384 So what do you want to know? 160 00:05:27,386 --> 00:05:29,903 - Well, why don't you just tell me something? 161 00:05:29,997 --> 00:05:31,997 Oh, well, if I ask you a question, 162 00:05:32,148 --> 00:05:33,557 you'll know what I want to hear. 163 00:05:33,575 --> 00:05:34,891 Then how am I going to know if you're 164 00:05:34,893 --> 00:05:37,485 really telling my fortune or you're just a fake? 165 00:05:37,563 --> 00:05:38,503 - Mm. OK. 166 00:05:38,580 --> 00:05:41,231 Your attitude is not appreciated. 167 00:05:41,249 --> 00:05:42,507 I don't go to your job and say the news is fake. 168 00:05:42,734 --> 00:05:44,918 - Well, actually, that's a big problem in journalism 169 00:05:45,070 --> 00:05:46,511 right now. - You're cool. 170 00:05:46,738 --> 00:05:48,071 You're cool. 171 00:05:48,073 --> 00:05:49,181 You both get free herb baths. - Thank you. 172 00:05:49,332 --> 00:05:50,740 - Thank you. - No herb bath for you. 173 00:05:50,759 --> 00:05:51,908 You're not cool. Get out. 174 00:05:51,927 --> 00:05:53,593 Bye-bye. 175 00:05:53,670 --> 00:05:55,854 - When people are rude, it is more a reflection of them 176 00:05:55,931 --> 00:05:58,748 than it is of you. 177 00:05:58,750 --> 00:05:59,858 Wait. 178 00:06:00,009 --> 00:06:01,768 How did he know I work in news? 179 00:06:01,920 --> 00:06:04,404 [dog howling, barking] 180 00:06:07,776 --> 00:06:08,867 - What do besties do? 181 00:06:09,094 --> 00:06:10,202 They let you know if you have a boog hanging out. 182 00:06:10,237 --> 00:06:11,536 They have your back in a prank war. 183 00:06:11,613 --> 00:06:15,949 Most importantly, be a good wing woman. 184 00:06:16,101 --> 00:06:17,209 If Barb likes that Hot Hermit, 185 00:06:17,360 --> 00:06:19,603 I'm serving up Hot Hermit on a platter. 186 00:06:19,621 --> 00:06:21,104 Mickey? 187 00:06:21,106 --> 00:06:25,384 - Imagine your body is on the crest of a wave. 188 00:06:25,535 --> 00:06:31,223 As you inhale, the tide goes out, and you notice-- 189 00:06:31,299 --> 00:06:33,207 - Dude, what are you doing? - Oh. 190 00:06:33,227 --> 00:06:34,876 - Your grandma said you were in the closet, 191 00:06:34,953 --> 00:06:35,894 but I thought she was being old. 192 00:06:36,045 --> 00:06:37,454 - Oh, I'm just making a recording 193 00:06:37,472 --> 00:06:38,638 for my Meditate With Mickey app. 194 00:06:38,807 --> 00:06:41,048 The acoustics in here are incredible, thanks to 195 00:06:41,068 --> 00:06:43,627 my extensive hand-knit woolen cap collection. 196 00:06:43,645 --> 00:06:44,903 Listen to this. 197 00:06:45,054 --> 00:06:46,796 I feel it's my duty to make use of my... 198 00:06:46,798 --> 00:06:50,391 [slowly] Soothing voice instrument. 199 00:06:50,411 --> 00:06:52,652 So what brings you to my studio, Kel-dawg? 200 00:06:52,729 --> 00:06:54,804 - Well, Mick dog, I'm actually here because I need to borrow 201 00:06:54,806 --> 00:06:56,898 your drone to make a sick video of Nan's house 202 00:06:56,917 --> 00:06:58,083 for Barb. 203 00:06:58,160 --> 00:06:59,233 - Ah. 204 00:06:59,369 --> 00:07:00,977 A drone is the perfect tool for that job, 205 00:07:00,996 --> 00:07:02,979 though I have two very important rules. 206 00:07:02,981 --> 00:07:04,606 Are you listening? - Yes. 207 00:07:04,666 --> 00:07:06,833 - One is that you be careful with Sharon Drone. 208 00:07:06,985 --> 00:07:09,428 Rule number two is very important. 209 00:07:09,579 --> 00:07:13,673 It's that you adhere to all federal privacy regulations. 210 00:07:13,825 --> 00:07:14,841 No spying. 211 00:07:14,918 --> 00:07:17,177 - Dude, we are on the same page. 212 00:07:17,271 --> 00:07:19,604 Literally was going to say no spying. 213 00:07:19,681 --> 00:07:21,589 Oh, we're definitely spying. 214 00:07:21,667 --> 00:07:23,183 As Barb's employee, I need to get 215 00:07:23,259 --> 00:07:25,351 those photos for the website. 216 00:07:25,504 --> 00:07:28,688 But as her wing woman, I need to check out the Hot Hermit. 217 00:07:28,840 --> 00:07:30,949 See if he's Barb material. 218 00:07:31,100 --> 00:07:33,601 I'm like a Barb bouncer. 219 00:07:33,679 --> 00:07:36,846 If you want to get into Barb, you've got to go through me. 220 00:07:36,940 --> 00:07:38,439 - Damn it. 221 00:07:38,517 --> 00:07:40,016 [groans] 222 00:07:40,035 --> 00:07:41,442 - I hired you to do some touch-ups, 223 00:07:41,462 --> 00:07:44,946 but that is some angry painting you're doing. 224 00:07:45,023 --> 00:07:46,189 - [sighs] I'm sorry. 225 00:07:46,191 --> 00:07:48,800 I'm just like super frustrated right now. 226 00:07:48,877 --> 00:07:50,785 Having throuple trouble. 227 00:07:50,862 --> 00:07:52,362 - What's going on? 228 00:07:52,380 --> 00:07:55,198 - Beth and Mickey are making me be like an actual butt 229 00:07:55,200 --> 00:07:56,308 for Halloween. 230 00:07:56,459 --> 00:07:58,310 Like, we're doing like a cowgirl and a horse, 231 00:07:58,461 --> 00:08:02,481 and they took the good parts of the costume, obviously. 232 00:08:02,632 --> 00:08:04,224 Always, actually. 233 00:08:04,376 --> 00:08:06,710 - Huh, sounds to me like you're getting pushed around. 234 00:08:06,712 --> 00:08:08,153 - Right? Yes. Thank you. 235 00:08:08,230 --> 00:08:10,063 It's like no one ever listens to me, 236 00:08:10,215 --> 00:08:11,490 and I'm feeling like a third wheel. 237 00:08:11,566 --> 00:08:13,883 It's like I--I really honestly can't even tell you 238 00:08:13,902 --> 00:08:15,401 if Beth even likes me anymore 239 00:08:15,554 --> 00:08:17,721 or if she just likes being part of a very complicated calendar. 240 00:08:17,739 --> 00:08:19,146 - I hear you. 241 00:08:19,166 --> 00:08:20,740 I mean, I've had a few throuple experiences myself. 242 00:08:20,892 --> 00:08:22,000 - Oh, yeah? 243 00:08:22,077 --> 00:08:23,651 - They were more like threesomes. 244 00:08:23,729 --> 00:08:25,504 Um... 245 00:08:25,580 --> 00:08:27,731 You want my advice? 246 00:08:27,733 --> 00:08:29,323 - Absolutely. 247 00:08:29,343 --> 00:08:32,326 - A throuple is only as strong as its weakest link. 248 00:08:32,420 --> 00:08:34,161 You got to put your foot down. - Right. 249 00:08:34,181 --> 00:08:35,162 - Make it clear that you will not 250 00:08:35,331 --> 00:08:36,740 be pushed around, 'cause right now, 251 00:08:36,758 --> 00:08:38,074 it's just a Halloween costume. 252 00:08:38,093 --> 00:08:39,017 But the next thing you know, you are pushed out 253 00:08:39,168 --> 00:08:40,293 of the family plan and a 22 year old 254 00:08:40,445 --> 00:08:41,745 is wearing your at-home wig. 255 00:08:41,855 --> 00:08:44,689 And I will tell you what I told that girl from Tallahassee. 256 00:08:44,766 --> 00:08:46,115 I said that is my damn waterbed, 257 00:08:46,117 --> 00:08:47,675 and Barb is not an appetizer. 258 00:08:47,677 --> 00:08:49,176 She is the whole damn meal. 259 00:08:49,196 --> 00:08:52,847 - Well, that is--that's really great advice. 260 00:08:52,866 --> 00:08:54,199 To be completely honest with you, 261 00:08:54,276 --> 00:08:55,925 I don't know what most of Barb's advice means. 262 00:08:55,927 --> 00:08:59,854 But I do know that when someone with a waterbed talks, 263 00:08:59,873 --> 00:09:01,856 you listen. 264 00:09:01,933 --> 00:09:03,190 - Hey, look. 265 00:09:03,210 --> 00:09:05,043 All my fan letters from my A-Men days. 266 00:09:05,120 --> 00:09:07,045 - Aw. - People were so thoughtful. 267 00:09:07,196 --> 00:09:10,531 One woman named her Boston Terrier after me. 268 00:09:10,609 --> 00:09:13,610 Fan mail, panties, 269 00:09:13,628 --> 00:09:16,037 fan mail, panties. 270 00:09:16,114 --> 00:09:17,055 Oh, hey. Look. 271 00:09:17,206 --> 00:09:19,373 The remote from my first apartment. 272 00:09:19,467 --> 00:09:20,708 [chuckles] 273 00:09:20,727 --> 00:09:21,951 More panties. 274 00:09:21,970 --> 00:09:23,136 - I forgot about the sheer volume-- 275 00:09:23,212 --> 00:09:24,729 - Ooh. - Of panties. 276 00:09:24,806 --> 00:09:27,415 - Look at this. 277 00:09:27,492 --> 00:09:28,900 The puka shells. 278 00:09:29,127 --> 00:09:31,236 The girls went crazy for this thing. 279 00:09:31,313 --> 00:09:35,131 Hey, Cheryl, can you handle the heat? 280 00:09:35,150 --> 00:09:37,133 - I remember the first time 281 00:09:37,135 --> 00:09:40,637 I saw that necklace in the video for the song 282 00:09:40,655 --> 00:09:42,488 "Take My Body and Eat It." 283 00:09:42,583 --> 00:09:47,660 Those, uh, puka shells all covered in sweat and... 284 00:09:47,737 --> 00:09:49,754 just bouncing up and down on his chest 285 00:09:49,831 --> 00:09:52,257 as he danced. 286 00:09:55,929 --> 00:09:57,578 What were you talking about? 287 00:09:57,598 --> 00:10:00,515 [animals chittering] 288 00:10:02,010 --> 00:10:03,509 [drone beeps] 289 00:10:03,586 --> 00:10:05,437 - Hey, thanks for taking me out here and showing me the ropes. 290 00:10:05,439 --> 00:10:07,497 Wouldn't want to risk slamming this puppy into a house 291 00:10:07,499 --> 00:10:08,940 on its first flight, right? - Of course. 292 00:10:09,167 --> 00:10:10,834 Well, the only person who lives out here 293 00:10:10,836 --> 00:10:11,835 is Rick the Hot Hermit. 294 00:10:11,895 --> 00:10:13,778 - Really? The hot what? 295 00:10:14,005 --> 00:10:15,614 I didn't know anyone lived out here. 296 00:10:15,765 --> 00:10:16,948 Who is that guy? 297 00:10:17,100 --> 00:10:18,358 - [stutters] Kelly, what did I say? 298 00:10:18,510 --> 00:10:21,119 This is spying. - That was the wind. OK? 299 00:10:21,196 --> 00:10:23,121 It's not spying if the wind wants to do it. 300 00:10:23,198 --> 00:10:25,773 The wind is really curious what Rick's up to. 301 00:10:25,792 --> 00:10:27,851 Weird, but OK, wind. 302 00:10:27,853 --> 00:10:29,702 [display beeps] 303 00:10:29,855 --> 00:10:30,870 Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. 304 00:10:31,022 --> 00:10:32,355 That's like a lot of axes, right? 305 00:10:32,374 --> 00:10:34,132 Like, what's a normal amount of axes to have? 306 00:10:34,283 --> 00:10:35,133 Seven? 307 00:10:35,302 --> 00:10:37,360 - Any number of axes is our cue to go. 308 00:10:37,362 --> 00:10:38,361 - Do you think he's like an ax murderer? 309 00:10:38,363 --> 00:10:39,529 - If he is, that's his business, 310 00:10:39,531 --> 00:10:41,030 and it's his right to keep that private. 311 00:10:41,049 --> 00:10:41,881 And it is my right to stay alive. 312 00:10:42,033 --> 00:10:43,049 So I will take back-- - No. 313 00:10:43,201 --> 00:10:45,201 It is my business if he's a killer. OK? 314 00:10:45,220 --> 00:10:47,053 As Barb's potential best friend, 315 00:10:47,205 --> 00:10:48,763 I don't want her hooking up with someone dangerous. 316 00:10:48,798 --> 00:10:50,223 - Wait. Rick is Barb's boyfriend? 317 00:10:50,299 --> 00:10:53,134 - He could be if he plays his cards right, 318 00:10:53,211 --> 00:10:54,377 like having a good explanation 319 00:10:54,379 --> 00:10:57,213 for his really creepy yard, right? 320 00:10:57,232 --> 00:10:58,715 - You ready for lunch? 321 00:10:58,733 --> 00:11:00,216 - Ugh, lunch? Right. 322 00:11:00,218 --> 00:11:01,976 Yeah, OK. Give me two minutes. 323 00:11:01,995 --> 00:11:04,220 I have had a day. 324 00:11:04,222 --> 00:11:06,313 First, the dishwasher broke down, 325 00:11:06,391 --> 00:11:09,000 and then the chickens mistook my nails for talons 326 00:11:09,077 --> 00:11:11,002 and tried to peck me to death. 327 00:11:11,154 --> 00:11:12,837 I'm a little concerned that Emily Chickenson 328 00:11:12,989 --> 00:11:14,339 might have enjoyed it. 329 00:11:14,490 --> 00:11:16,916 - [sighs] You know what's happening, right? 330 00:11:17,068 --> 00:11:18,510 That psychic put a curse on you. 331 00:11:18,586 --> 00:11:19,827 - Oh. 332 00:11:19,846 --> 00:11:21,846 No, it's-- it's just a bad day. 333 00:11:21,998 --> 00:11:23,923 None of that woo-woo stuff is real. 334 00:11:24,000 --> 00:11:25,332 - Did you tell the psychic that? 335 00:11:25,410 --> 00:11:27,744 - Uh, I may have implied it. - Come on. 336 00:11:27,762 --> 00:11:29,595 Let's go. Let's--hurry up. 337 00:11:29,690 --> 00:11:33,525 - OK, I just need to check the paper today. 338 00:11:36,863 --> 00:11:39,864 [gasps] Oh, no! 339 00:11:39,941 --> 00:11:42,850 They forgot to print the front page? 340 00:11:42,869 --> 00:11:44,944 That's never happened before. 341 00:11:45,096 --> 00:11:46,687 - So let me get this straight. 342 00:11:46,707 --> 00:11:47,931 You want me to wear this, 343 00:11:47,949 --> 00:11:49,949 and you added a muscle suit for Mickey? 344 00:11:50,026 --> 00:11:51,192 - Well, it's nothing personal, Shrub. 345 00:11:51,211 --> 00:11:52,544 Do you want a muscle butt? - Yeah. 346 00:11:52,695 --> 00:11:55,196 Of course I want a muscle butt. I'm only human, Beth. 347 00:11:55,215 --> 00:11:57,623 But it's about having to ask, guys. 348 00:11:57,700 --> 00:11:58,942 I'm like-- 349 00:11:58,944 --> 00:12:00,109 - Comrades, I do hate to rush us. 350 00:12:00,111 --> 00:12:01,461 But I need to get back to protecting my drone. 351 00:12:01,537 --> 00:12:03,613 - What are you talking about? - Well, throuple focus. 352 00:12:03,631 --> 00:12:04,797 Cowgirl assemble. 353 00:12:04,950 --> 00:12:07,041 It's time to jaunty walk. 354 00:12:07,118 --> 00:12:08,709 Ready? OK. 355 00:12:08,729 --> 00:12:11,378 Here we go. 356 00:12:11,398 --> 00:12:13,139 - OK. Shrub, you need to get lower. 357 00:12:13,291 --> 00:12:15,141 The head shouldn't be on the same plane as the butt. 358 00:12:15,218 --> 00:12:16,568 - I'm trying, Mickey. 359 00:12:16,719 --> 00:12:18,461 I have a lot of back problems for a young man, actually. 360 00:12:18,463 --> 00:12:20,888 - If the butt talks, it ruins the illusion. 361 00:12:20,966 --> 00:12:24,133 - Yes, as our sweet Beth aptly put it, shush your tush. 362 00:12:24,152 --> 00:12:26,244 - Well, I'm not going to shush my tush, OK? 363 00:12:26,395 --> 00:12:28,154 This butt has something to say, 364 00:12:28,231 --> 00:12:30,081 and it's that you guys never listen to me. 365 00:12:30,233 --> 00:12:31,565 No one ever cares how I feel, 366 00:12:31,643 --> 00:12:33,326 and all the good stuff always goes to Mickey. 367 00:12:33,402 --> 00:12:34,978 And it's like, what? Now you don't want me to talk? 368 00:12:34,996 --> 00:12:36,755 Are you kidding me? 369 00:12:36,831 --> 00:12:38,331 That is so stupid. 370 00:12:38,483 --> 00:12:39,482 You know what? 371 00:12:39,651 --> 00:12:43,428 I'm out of this costume and the throuple. 372 00:12:45,748 --> 00:12:46,990 Gah. Whatever! 373 00:12:47,008 --> 00:12:50,584 Just--you know, Shrub is not an appetizer, OK? 374 00:12:50,604 --> 00:12:53,420 I'm the whole dang meal. 375 00:12:53,498 --> 00:12:55,440 [door slams] 376 00:12:55,517 --> 00:12:56,666 - [screams] 377 00:12:56,668 --> 00:12:57,925 - Cheryl! Are you OK? 378 00:12:58,003 --> 00:12:59,885 - I think I'm having an allergic reaction. 379 00:13:00,038 --> 00:13:01,279 So Mandy gave me this oil 380 00:13:01,430 --> 00:13:03,097 that she got at a gas station in New Orleans. 381 00:13:03,174 --> 00:13:04,449 And she swears that that's why 382 00:13:04,600 --> 00:13:06,785 she hasn't had bad luck in like six years. 383 00:13:06,936 --> 00:13:08,102 No, I haven't been cursed. 384 00:13:08,121 --> 00:13:10,179 [chuckles] That's ridiculous. 385 00:13:10,198 --> 00:13:13,016 She just--she wouldn't take no for an answer. 386 00:13:13,034 --> 00:13:14,867 Oh, these are good for that. 387 00:13:14,944 --> 00:13:16,519 [sighs] 388 00:13:16,538 --> 00:13:18,021 She thinks that the psychic put a curse on me, 389 00:13:18,039 --> 00:13:20,873 which is ridiculous, obviously. 390 00:13:21,026 --> 00:13:22,708 - I totally believe in curses. 391 00:13:22,785 --> 00:13:24,210 I also believe in elves. 392 00:13:24,362 --> 00:13:27,213 And if you cross your eyes long enough, they'll stay that way. 393 00:13:27,290 --> 00:13:30,383 And that quicksand is everywhere. 394 00:13:30,459 --> 00:13:34,037 - I mean, minus the axes, it's a really beautiful property. 395 00:13:34,055 --> 00:13:35,721 - Kelly, I've been looking for you everywhere. 396 00:13:35,798 --> 00:13:37,131 What are you doing here? 397 00:13:37,208 --> 00:13:38,966 We're supposed to meet at Nan's house. 398 00:13:38,985 --> 00:13:40,968 - Rick. It's Rick. 399 00:13:41,046 --> 00:13:42,712 Oh, my God. What is he doing? 400 00:13:42,805 --> 00:13:44,489 [gasps] - Oh! 401 00:13:44,640 --> 00:13:46,049 [drone beeping] 402 00:13:46,067 --> 00:13:48,475 - Sharon! [crash] 403 00:13:48,495 --> 00:13:49,410 Sharon! 404 00:13:52,666 --> 00:13:53,665 - Been thinking about my new guy. 405 00:13:53,816 --> 00:13:55,149 You can't go fishing without a pole. 406 00:13:55,226 --> 00:13:57,651 And by fishing, I mean snagging a man. 407 00:13:57,729 --> 00:14:00,821 And by pole, I mean me. 408 00:14:00,899 --> 00:14:02,340 - Hey, Barb. You look nice today. 409 00:14:03,401 --> 00:14:04,658 - Look, I know Joe's with Cheryl, 410 00:14:04,827 --> 00:14:07,512 but there do seem to be quite a few weird arrangements 411 00:14:07,547 --> 00:14:09,238 in this town. 412 00:14:09,240 --> 00:14:11,407 Maybe I should be open to one, too. 413 00:14:11,409 --> 00:14:14,668 You know, the psychic did say "unexpected." 414 00:14:14,746 --> 00:14:17,522 Hey, you too. 415 00:14:17,673 --> 00:14:18,931 You look great. 416 00:14:19,084 --> 00:14:20,224 - Oh. - What are you-- 417 00:14:20,226 --> 00:14:21,842 what are you--how are you? 418 00:14:21,862 --> 00:14:23,436 - [sighs] Great. Yeah. 419 00:14:23,530 --> 00:14:25,012 I'm just picking up some anti-itch cream for some boils 420 00:14:25,031 --> 00:14:27,365 that started to ooze. 421 00:14:27,516 --> 00:14:29,183 - Oh. 422 00:14:29,260 --> 00:14:31,327 - Well, got to go. - Yeah, me too. 423 00:14:32,931 --> 00:14:34,597 - Told you. 424 00:14:34,616 --> 00:14:36,165 Catnip. 425 00:14:39,695 --> 00:14:41,695 [knocking] 426 00:14:41,715 --> 00:14:43,272 - [exclaims] - Hell--oh. 427 00:14:43,274 --> 00:14:46,033 Hello, sir. How are you doing today? 428 00:14:46,111 --> 00:14:47,627 - Are you spying on me? 429 00:14:47,703 --> 00:14:49,554 - No. No, man. 430 00:14:49,705 --> 00:14:51,130 [laughs nervously] Seriously. 431 00:14:51,282 --> 00:14:53,207 We're going to look back on this and just laugh up a storm. 432 00:14:53,226 --> 00:14:54,467 OK? 433 00:14:54,619 --> 00:14:58,379 We were just curious why you have so many axes. 434 00:14:58,398 --> 00:15:00,306 - I have axes because I chop stuff. 435 00:15:00,383 --> 00:15:02,642 - Look, if we could just get the drone back, we will be-- 436 00:15:02,794 --> 00:15:04,810 - Invading my privacy again? 437 00:15:04,929 --> 00:15:06,812 Mm-mm, I don't think so, 438 00:15:06,965 --> 00:15:08,948 because I am so pissed off right now 439 00:15:09,058 --> 00:15:10,316 that you're not getting this back. 440 00:15:10,393 --> 00:15:13,411 I am so angry that I'm making myself more angry 441 00:15:13,562 --> 00:15:15,396 thinking about being angry right now. 442 00:15:15,415 --> 00:15:18,082 And I'm not supposed to get that angry. 443 00:15:18,234 --> 00:15:20,643 And I got a damn stress-induced ulcer. 444 00:15:20,662 --> 00:15:21,978 [groans] - OK. 445 00:15:21,996 --> 00:15:24,071 - I'm going to hack this to bits just to calm down. 446 00:15:24,165 --> 00:15:27,150 - Great idea, but real quick-- 447 00:15:27,152 --> 00:15:30,595 have you ever heard of Meditate With Mickey? 448 00:15:33,767 --> 00:15:35,324 - It's an app... 449 00:15:35,326 --> 00:15:37,894 [slowly, smoothly] For relaxation. 450 00:15:39,088 --> 00:15:40,329 - You know, the strangest thing happened 451 00:15:40,423 --> 00:15:43,349 when I was out picking up your anti-itch cream. 452 00:15:43,501 --> 00:15:46,110 I think Barb Flatch was hitting on me. 453 00:15:46,262 --> 00:15:48,004 Must be the puka power. 454 00:15:48,006 --> 00:15:50,615 - Yeah, OK. Fine. 455 00:15:50,766 --> 00:15:52,408 I have been cursed. 456 00:15:54,512 --> 00:15:55,286 - Hey. 457 00:15:55,438 --> 00:15:56,788 Sorry about that. 458 00:15:56,864 --> 00:16:00,941 I just had to, uh, dip out for a quick throuple thing. 459 00:16:00,961 --> 00:16:03,519 The last throuple thing, actually. 460 00:16:03,538 --> 00:16:06,706 Yeah, I took your advice, and I ended it with Beth and Mick. 461 00:16:06,708 --> 00:16:08,132 [pops mouth] - Wow. 462 00:16:08,209 --> 00:16:10,359 - Yeah. - Well, good for you, Shrub. 463 00:16:10,420 --> 00:16:11,302 - Eh. 464 00:16:11,379 --> 00:16:12,637 - I have to say that is certainly 465 00:16:12,788 --> 00:16:16,432 not what I was...expecting. 466 00:16:18,219 --> 00:16:21,479 - [smoothly] And you're walking by a babbling brook 467 00:16:21,630 --> 00:16:24,965 in a peaceful meadow. 468 00:16:24,985 --> 00:16:28,802 Some lovely birds are chirping. 469 00:16:28,880 --> 00:16:35,142 A meadow mouse pops up to say hello, and the mouse-- 470 00:16:35,161 --> 00:16:37,720 - [smoothly] And the mouse thinks 471 00:16:37,739 --> 00:16:40,164 you should go on a date 472 00:16:40,316 --> 00:16:46,653 with a strong, hot real estate woman. 473 00:16:46,731 --> 00:16:48,247 So when Rick started yelling, 474 00:16:48,399 --> 00:16:50,491 I was like, this dude's a psychopath. 475 00:16:50,568 --> 00:16:52,493 Like, I don't want him anywhere near Barb. 476 00:16:52,495 --> 00:16:55,071 Friends do not let friends date psychopaths. 477 00:16:55,089 --> 00:16:58,241 But then he sort of committed to working on himself, 478 00:16:58,243 --> 00:16:59,666 and Barb loves a project. 479 00:16:59,744 --> 00:17:01,244 That girl always has her glue sticks out, you know? 480 00:17:01,262 --> 00:17:03,746 If anyone can fix him, it's Barb. 481 00:17:03,839 --> 00:17:05,264 So yeah. I'm back on Rick for Barb. 482 00:17:05,341 --> 00:17:07,734 I think it could be great. You know? 483 00:17:07,843 --> 00:17:09,935 But he's on really thin ice. 484 00:17:10,012 --> 00:17:12,196 - And find something to focus on, 485 00:17:12,348 --> 00:17:16,092 bringing your attention back to the room. 486 00:17:16,110 --> 00:17:17,702 And that concludes today's session 487 00:17:17,853 --> 00:17:19,095 of Meditate With Mickey. 488 00:17:19,097 --> 00:17:20,446 Namaste. 489 00:17:20,598 --> 00:17:22,782 - I accept. 490 00:17:22,934 --> 00:17:25,376 - Uh, you accept what? 491 00:17:25,528 --> 00:17:27,378 - Your offer. 492 00:17:27,455 --> 00:17:31,774 With a strong hot woman in real estate, right? 493 00:17:31,793 --> 00:17:32,942 - Oh. Uh... 494 00:17:32,944 --> 00:17:34,126 [chuckles nervously] 495 00:17:34,279 --> 00:17:37,963 - How many pounds of frozen meat can you lift? 496 00:17:38,116 --> 00:17:41,284 - [imitates cracking] [screams, gasps] 497 00:17:41,302 --> 00:17:42,709 That was Rick falling through the ice, 498 00:17:42,729 --> 00:17:46,439 though I can't blame him for catching feelings. 499 00:17:50,478 --> 00:17:51,294 - Mandy! 500 00:17:51,312 --> 00:17:52,478 You're right. 501 00:17:52,555 --> 00:17:53,963 I was cursed, and now the curse is coming 502 00:17:53,965 --> 00:17:55,406 for Joe and I. 503 00:17:55,633 --> 00:17:57,817 What do we do? 504 00:17:57,893 --> 00:17:59,577 - We go confront that psychic. 505 00:17:59,728 --> 00:18:02,729 Son of a witch gave it to you. That means he can reverse it. 506 00:18:02,807 --> 00:18:04,082 - Yes! - Yeah. 507 00:18:04,233 --> 00:18:05,975 Oh. Mm. Are those oven mitts? 508 00:18:05,993 --> 00:18:07,159 - Oh, yeah. 509 00:18:07,236 --> 00:18:08,419 They help me stop itching, the hives. 510 00:18:08,571 --> 00:18:10,404 Also, can you drive? 511 00:18:10,423 --> 00:18:12,739 I had real trouble shifting on the way out here. 512 00:18:12,759 --> 00:18:14,817 - I got you. I know. It's--yeah. 513 00:18:14,819 --> 00:18:16,427 I got you. Don't worry. 514 00:18:16,504 --> 00:18:19,413 [sultry music] 515 00:18:19,432 --> 00:18:20,914 ♪ ♪ 516 00:18:20,934 --> 00:18:22,600 - To the unexpected. - Oh. 517 00:18:22,751 --> 00:18:25,344 Those are really pretty. 518 00:18:25,496 --> 00:18:28,180 - You are drinking a Barbarita. - Mm. 519 00:18:28,333 --> 00:18:30,683 - [chuckles] Like how that tastes? 520 00:18:30,759 --> 00:18:32,092 - Uh-huh. 521 00:18:32,112 --> 00:18:36,430 It is way better than my nan's Banananana colada. 522 00:18:36,524 --> 00:18:38,098 - Here. 523 00:18:38,176 --> 00:18:40,785 Let me. Let me help you. 524 00:18:40,936 --> 00:18:45,531 ♪ ♪ 525 00:18:45,608 --> 00:18:50,110 I used to work summers for the neighbor, who was a handyman. 526 00:18:50,163 --> 00:18:55,708 He taught me all of his secrets. 527 00:18:55,860 --> 00:18:58,952 [both grunting, gasping] 528 00:18:58,972 --> 00:19:00,972 - Close your mouth some. 529 00:19:01,123 --> 00:19:03,032 Come here. Come here. 530 00:19:03,050 --> 00:19:04,200 - [moaning] Oh. 531 00:19:04,202 --> 00:19:06,051 [door slams] [crash] 532 00:19:06,128 --> 00:19:07,553 [fabric rips] Oh! 533 00:19:07,647 --> 00:19:08,795 OK, you got to pull hard. 534 00:19:08,873 --> 00:19:10,022 I couldn't get the tail off either. 535 00:19:13,153 --> 00:19:14,226 - Well, I didn't get back on the horse, 536 00:19:14,320 --> 00:19:16,487 but I got back on the back of the horse. 537 00:19:16,639 --> 00:19:18,731 [chuckles] Oh. 538 00:19:18,883 --> 00:19:21,384 And it was intense. [chuckles] 539 00:19:21,386 --> 00:19:24,220 Oh, Shrub is surprisingly good at taking direction. 540 00:19:24,222 --> 00:19:26,813 - [exclaims] I lost my virginity 541 00:19:26,833 --> 00:19:28,332 three and a half times! 542 00:19:28,409 --> 00:19:30,651 Yeah, turns out there is a ton of stuff you can do, 543 00:19:30,728 --> 00:19:32,819 and it all counts as sex. 544 00:19:32,839 --> 00:19:34,821 Um... 545 00:19:34,899 --> 00:19:36,582 Lots of twists and turns, though. 546 00:19:36,734 --> 00:19:38,158 Few red herrings. 547 00:19:38,178 --> 00:19:39,868 - OK. Bye, Rick. - Wait, wait, wait, hey. 548 00:19:39,904 --> 00:19:41,570 - Bye. - Please. 549 00:19:41,572 --> 00:19:42,922 Please take some soup. 550 00:19:42,998 --> 00:19:45,257 - Oh. Thank you. - Thank you. 551 00:19:45,410 --> 00:19:48,911 - And, Kelly, let me know if you ever change your mind. 552 00:19:48,930 --> 00:19:50,429 - Sweetheart. - Bye. 553 00:19:50,581 --> 00:19:51,764 - [chuckles] - Thank you. 554 00:19:51,916 --> 00:19:53,674 - Yeah. Go, go, go. - Uh, he kills his own meat? 555 00:19:53,693 --> 00:19:57,195 - I don't know, but I don't think we should eat this soup. 556 00:19:57,422 --> 00:19:58,587 - OK. 557 00:19:58,606 --> 00:20:00,865 - [whispers] Hey, dude. Look, look, look, look. 558 00:20:00,867 --> 00:20:02,591 - [gasps] Sharon Drone! - Shh! 559 00:20:02,610 --> 00:20:03,684 - [laughs] 560 00:20:03,761 --> 00:20:05,494 - Yeah, I did that. 561 00:20:07,690 --> 00:20:08,948 Spy. 562 00:20:09,024 --> 00:20:10,190 - You need to remove the curse that you 563 00:20:10,268 --> 00:20:12,935 put on me right now or else. 564 00:20:12,954 --> 00:20:14,861 - Or else you'll bake me a pie? 565 00:20:14,956 --> 00:20:16,789 - All right. That's enough. 566 00:20:16,883 --> 00:20:18,532 No one makes fun of my weird friends. 567 00:20:18,551 --> 00:20:19,792 - Yeah! 568 00:20:19,868 --> 00:20:21,794 - I got one word for you-- Chapstick. 569 00:20:21,870 --> 00:20:24,388 Two words, lickin' Chapstick. 570 00:20:24,540 --> 00:20:26,057 You, drugstore. 571 00:20:26,133 --> 00:20:28,117 Seen it, filmed it. 572 00:20:28,119 --> 00:20:29,876 That's a bunch of two words. 573 00:20:29,896 --> 00:20:31,637 Scared? 574 00:20:31,789 --> 00:20:35,882 Wonder what would happen to your business if that got out. 575 00:20:35,960 --> 00:20:37,293 - You know what? 576 00:20:37,386 --> 00:20:40,053 Let me get that curse removal done on the house. 577 00:20:40,073 --> 00:20:42,073 - Got you, babe. - Give me your mitts. 578 00:20:42,224 --> 00:20:43,574 - Say goodbye to the puks, babe. 579 00:20:43,726 --> 00:20:45,359 - Yup. That's the past. 580 00:20:45,470 --> 00:20:47,136 - I can't be going around town breaking girls hearts. 581 00:20:47,138 --> 00:20:50,322 Besides, Cheryl's my only lady. 582 00:20:50,399 --> 00:20:52,641 - Maybe we keep them out. 583 00:20:52,660 --> 00:20:54,418 Just for tonight. 584 00:20:56,071 --> 00:20:57,421 - I knew that psychic was bunk. OK? 585 00:20:57,573 --> 00:21:00,091 Literally nothing that scared me all day long. 586 00:21:00,167 --> 00:21:02,334 Even went to the psycho hermit's house. 587 00:21:02,411 --> 00:21:03,335 And like, between us, 588 00:21:03,429 --> 00:21:06,097 I'm like 5% sure that dude is a murderer. 589 00:21:06,173 --> 00:21:07,006 [drone beeps] Guess I'm unscareable. 590 00:21:07,082 --> 00:21:09,058 Let's do this. 591 00:21:12,330 --> 00:21:15,064 If I know Barb, she loves a window detail. 592 00:21:16,684 --> 00:21:19,360 [drone buzzing] 593 00:21:20,929 --> 00:21:22,763 [dog howls] 594 00:21:22,840 --> 00:21:25,265 [screams] 595 00:21:25,285 --> 00:21:26,859 [drone beeping] [crash] 596 00:21:26,935 --> 00:21:28,844 - Sharon Drone! 597 00:21:28,846 --> 00:21:30,413 [sobs]