1 00:00:01,957 --> 00:00:03,959 - Vicki. Vicki, come in! 2 00:00:04,003 --> 00:00:06,005 Vicki. [indistinct] 3 00:00:06,049 --> 00:00:06,919 [in Russian accent] - This is fun. 4 00:00:06,962 --> 00:00:08,703 Where are we going? 5 00:00:08,747 --> 00:00:11,010 - Vicki! Vicki! 6 00:00:11,054 --> 00:00:12,055 Vicki, come in! 7 00:00:12,098 --> 00:00:13,360 Vicki, do you copy? 8 00:00:13,404 --> 00:00:15,145 Shit, her signal's dead. 9 00:00:15,188 --> 00:00:17,321 - Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck. 10 00:00:17,364 --> 00:00:20,106 Okay, Checkers, looks like Vicki is forcing us 11 00:00:20,150 --> 00:00:21,542 to go with plan B. 12 00:00:21,586 --> 00:00:23,109 And I'm not talking about the morning-after pill, 13 00:00:23,153 --> 00:00:25,677 which I have used several times after one night stands 14 00:00:25,720 --> 00:00:27,853 and a few times with long-term relationships 15 00:00:27,896 --> 00:00:28,941 in which I just wasn't ready 16 00:00:28,984 --> 00:00:30,203 to make that kind of commitment yet. 17 00:00:30,247 --> 00:00:32,205 But no, the other plan B, 18 00:00:32,249 --> 00:00:34,120 an alternate plan to plan A, 19 00:00:34,164 --> 00:00:35,861 which Vicki just fucking torpedoed 20 00:00:35,904 --> 00:00:37,123 like a Russian U-boat. 21 00:00:37,167 --> 00:00:38,298 - Right. 22 00:00:38,342 --> 00:00:39,560 - Ooh, driving fast. 23 00:00:39,604 --> 00:00:40,909 - Got her. 24 00:00:40,953 --> 00:00:42,476 They're in a black SUV heading east on Bayshore. 25 00:00:42,520 --> 00:00:44,913 - Shit, Checkers, meet at the Miata, stat! 26 00:00:44,957 --> 00:00:47,916 [dramatic music] 27 00:00:47,960 --> 00:00:52,138 ♪ 28 00:00:52,182 --> 00:00:54,749 Vicky, Vicky, do you copy? 29 00:00:54,793 --> 00:00:56,011 Do you copy? 30 00:00:56,055 --> 00:00:57,187 Vicky, do you copy? 31 00:00:57,230 --> 00:00:58,275 - Oh, thank God. [coughs] 32 00:00:58,318 --> 00:01:00,103 I copy. [clears throat] 33 00:01:00,146 --> 00:01:01,408 [in Russian accent] Sorry, I just 34 00:01:01,452 --> 00:01:02,801 have to clear my throat. 35 00:01:02,844 --> 00:01:03,889 - Oh, gotcha, Vicki! 36 00:01:03,932 --> 00:01:05,499 Okay, look, we lost your 20. 37 00:01:05,543 --> 00:01:08,676 So any information you could sneak us would be a big help. 38 00:01:10,591 --> 00:01:13,203 - [clears throat] ♪ Going down the street 39 00:01:13,246 --> 00:01:15,596 ♪ Going straight, straight, straight ♪ 40 00:01:15,640 --> 00:01:19,513 ♪ And left, left, left, and straight again ♪ 41 00:01:19,557 --> 00:01:21,167 - Keep it down back there. 42 00:01:21,211 --> 00:01:22,429 [in Russian accent] - Sorry. 43 00:01:22,473 --> 00:01:25,563 I get carsick if I don't sing to myself 44 00:01:25,606 --> 00:01:27,347 in an American accent. 45 00:01:27,391 --> 00:01:28,740 - Doing a great job, Vick. 46 00:01:28,783 --> 00:01:31,830 But can you give us anything more specific? 47 00:01:31,873 --> 00:01:33,266 - [rapping] ♪ The road's got a lump 48 00:01:33,310 --> 00:01:34,746 ♪ And a bump and a thumpity-thump ♪ 49 00:01:34,789 --> 00:01:37,792 ♪ And we hit a gravel patch, y'all ♪ 50 00:01:37,836 --> 00:01:39,925 ♪ So I think it's only natural ♪ 51 00:01:39,968 --> 00:01:42,754 ♪ To assume we're off the main road ♪ 52 00:01:42,797 --> 00:01:43,885 - Gravel road? 53 00:01:43,929 --> 00:01:45,104 She must've left downtown. 54 00:01:45,148 --> 00:01:46,279 - All right, that's great, Vick. 55 00:01:46,323 --> 00:01:47,933 You're in silver medal territory, 56 00:01:47,976 --> 00:01:50,022 but we're going for the gold. 57 00:01:50,065 --> 00:01:51,371 - Got it. [clears throat] 58 00:01:51,415 --> 00:01:54,461 ♪ And when you cross the train tracks ♪ 59 00:01:54,505 --> 00:01:57,638 ♪ And you hear that crunching metal ♪ 60 00:01:57,682 --> 00:02:03,209 ♪ That's the end of the road for us ♪ 61 00:02:03,253 --> 00:02:05,124 ♪ Us 62 00:02:05,168 --> 00:02:06,169 [tires squeak] 63 00:02:06,212 --> 00:02:08,214 ♪ 'Cause we stopped 64 00:02:08,258 --> 00:02:09,172 - I know where she is. 65 00:02:09,215 --> 00:02:10,260 - Nice, Checkers. 66 00:02:10,303 --> 00:02:12,000 Vicki, we're on our way. 67 00:02:12,044 --> 00:02:16,353 ♪ 68 00:02:16,396 --> 00:02:17,571 - There's only one active rail line 69 00:02:17,615 --> 00:02:19,051 near the old wrecking yard. 70 00:02:19,094 --> 00:02:20,879 This has to be the place. 71 00:02:20,922 --> 00:02:23,838 ♪ 72 00:02:23,882 --> 00:02:24,970 Bingo. 73 00:02:25,013 --> 00:02:26,711 They must've already taken her inside. 74 00:02:26,754 --> 00:02:28,016 - Shit! 75 00:02:28,060 --> 00:02:29,322 All right, Checkers. 76 00:02:29,366 --> 00:02:31,019 Time to pump the bump. 77 00:02:31,063 --> 00:02:34,240 - MacGruber, we have no idea what we're up against in there. 78 00:02:34,284 --> 00:02:35,807 I think it's time to call the cavalry. 79 00:02:35,850 --> 00:02:37,504 - Checkers... 80 00:02:37,548 --> 00:02:40,812 we are the fucking cavalry. 81 00:02:42,379 --> 00:02:44,250 I overextended it. Hang on. 82 00:02:44,294 --> 00:02:45,904 Let me get the key in here. 83 00:02:45,947 --> 00:02:48,863 [dramatic music] 84 00:02:48,907 --> 00:02:55,870 ♪ 85 00:03:08,318 --> 00:03:13,192 - ♪ MacGruber 86 00:03:13,236 --> 00:03:16,239 [fire crackles] 87 00:03:16,282 --> 00:03:17,892 [dark ominous music] 88 00:03:17,936 --> 00:03:18,980 - [gasps] 89 00:03:19,024 --> 00:03:20,852 - Dr. Poliskaya. - [sighs] 90 00:03:20,895 --> 00:03:23,637 - It is a pleasure to finally meet you. 91 00:03:25,509 --> 00:03:27,119 - [with Russian accent] And a very pleasure 92 00:03:27,162 --> 00:03:29,904 to meet you, Mr. 93 00:03:29,948 --> 00:03:33,256 - I've been such a fan of yours since Oslo. 94 00:03:35,170 --> 00:03:37,434 - [laughs nervously] Oslo. 95 00:03:40,219 --> 00:03:43,178 Well, we should probably get to work. 96 00:03:43,222 --> 00:03:45,311 - Great. Let me show you to the lab. 97 00:03:47,357 --> 00:03:49,315 - Vicki, we made it inside. 98 00:03:49,359 --> 00:03:51,448 Look, this may be your last chance. 99 00:03:51,491 --> 00:03:53,624 We can provide cover fire, okay? 100 00:03:53,667 --> 00:03:56,409 So just make a break for it and head for us. 101 00:03:56,453 --> 00:03:58,846 We're roughly, like, 10 feet above you, right? 102 00:03:58,890 --> 00:04:01,327 At your, like, 7:00 a.m. Pacific Standard Time. 103 00:04:01,371 --> 00:04:02,981 No, no, no, no, no, like, 6:00 a.m.? 104 00:04:03,024 --> 00:04:05,636 So 7:00 a.m. Mountain Standard Time. 105 00:04:05,679 --> 00:04:07,159 No, Checkers, would you say this is 7:00? 106 00:04:07,202 --> 00:04:08,378 - We're upstairs. 107 00:04:08,421 --> 00:04:10,293 - Checkers, don't confuse her! 108 00:04:10,336 --> 00:04:12,077 Vicki, I am so sorry about him. 109 00:04:12,120 --> 00:04:15,428 So, like, 7:00-ish and maybe 12 feet. 110 00:04:15,472 --> 00:04:17,082 [static whines] Wait, wait, wait, Vicki! 111 00:04:17,125 --> 00:04:19,171 Vicki, Vicki, Vicki, Vicki! 112 00:04:19,214 --> 00:04:21,260 Vicki, Vicki, Vicki, Vicki! 113 00:04:21,304 --> 00:04:23,131 Vicki, Vicki, Vicki! 114 00:04:23,175 --> 00:04:24,872 Vicki, Vicki, Vicki! 115 00:04:24,916 --> 00:04:26,309 Vicki, Vicki, Vicki! 116 00:04:26,352 --> 00:04:27,571 Vicki, Vicki--shit! 117 00:04:27,614 --> 00:04:29,050 She turned off her ear thingy. 118 00:04:29,094 --> 00:04:30,225 Oh, no, damn it! 119 00:04:30,269 --> 00:04:31,357 Nice going, Checkers! 120 00:04:31,401 --> 00:04:32,619 - Sorry. 121 00:04:32,663 --> 00:04:33,968 - I think you'll find that everything 122 00:04:34,012 --> 00:04:36,667 is exactly to your specifications. 123 00:04:36,710 --> 00:04:38,059 - Yes. 124 00:04:38,103 --> 00:04:40,714 I very hope it's acceptable. 125 00:04:40,758 --> 00:04:43,369 - Mm-hmm. 126 00:04:43,413 --> 00:04:46,546 - Ah, little refrigerator. 127 00:04:46,590 --> 00:04:47,852 [alarm beeping] 128 00:04:47,895 --> 00:04:50,463 Nope. Hmm. Something else. 129 00:04:50,507 --> 00:04:52,987 - [chuckles] 130 00:04:53,031 --> 00:04:56,295 - These are good for looking at small things. 131 00:04:56,339 --> 00:04:58,515 - Mm-hmm. 132 00:04:58,558 --> 00:05:02,345 - Use a lot of cabinets for my... 133 00:05:02,388 --> 00:05:04,172 tubes. 134 00:05:04,216 --> 00:05:06,349 Ah, this is... 135 00:05:06,392 --> 00:05:08,002 missing, um, s-- 136 00:05:08,046 --> 00:05:09,700 oh! 137 00:05:09,743 --> 00:05:11,528 There it is. [laughs] 138 00:05:11,571 --> 00:05:12,964 [tense music] 139 00:05:13,007 --> 00:05:16,359 Then I guess we are, as you say, 140 00:05:16,402 --> 00:05:20,493 very...set to jet. 141 00:05:20,537 --> 00:05:22,365 - Shit. What's the play here? 142 00:05:22,408 --> 00:05:23,757 What's the fucking play? 143 00:05:23,801 --> 00:05:25,280 - Maybe we just stand down. 144 00:05:25,324 --> 00:05:26,543 It looks like it's working. 145 00:05:26,586 --> 00:05:28,501 - What happens when she destroys Brimstone? 146 00:05:28,545 --> 00:05:29,633 They'll kill her! 147 00:05:29,676 --> 00:05:30,938 - I know this is difficult, 148 00:05:30,982 --> 00:05:33,898 but like you said, Vicki's a soldier. 149 00:05:33,941 --> 00:05:35,203 This is her call. 150 00:05:35,247 --> 00:05:42,167 ♪ 151 00:05:42,210 --> 00:05:43,211 - No! 152 00:05:43,255 --> 00:05:44,387 - MacGruber! 153 00:05:44,430 --> 00:05:46,954 Where are you going? 154 00:05:46,998 --> 00:05:48,391 Shit. 155 00:05:48,434 --> 00:05:51,437 - So where is the item? 156 00:05:51,481 --> 00:05:53,221 - I thought you'd never ask. 157 00:05:53,265 --> 00:05:56,224 [dramatic music] 158 00:05:56,268 --> 00:06:02,840 ♪ 159 00:06:02,883 --> 00:06:04,581 - [gasps] 160 00:06:20,379 --> 00:06:22,425 - Freeze! 161 00:06:22,468 --> 00:06:23,600 Make one more move 162 00:06:23,643 --> 00:06:25,471 and I'll blow your fucking hands off 163 00:06:25,515 --> 00:06:27,430 and then use the remaining bullets 164 00:06:27,473 --> 00:06:28,909 to explode your fucking head! 165 00:06:28,953 --> 00:06:31,912 Put your fucking hands up, woman! 166 00:06:31,956 --> 00:06:35,263 And not a move from anyone else. 167 00:06:35,307 --> 00:06:38,832 Hello, Lon, Baker, Bex, 168 00:06:38,876 --> 00:06:41,879 other assorted pieces of fucking shit. 169 00:06:41,922 --> 00:06:44,403 That woman is not who you think she is. 170 00:06:44,447 --> 00:06:48,799 She's not a Russian scientist, but rather an American soldier. 171 00:06:48,842 --> 00:06:50,757 - That man is insane. 172 00:06:50,801 --> 00:06:54,065 He does not know what he's talking about. 173 00:06:54,108 --> 00:06:56,720 - Her sole intention is to get ahold of Brimstone 174 00:06:56,763 --> 00:06:57,938 and destroy it. 175 00:06:57,982 --> 00:06:59,418 And unless you want that to happen, 176 00:06:59,462 --> 00:07:01,942 you will do exactly as I say. 177 00:07:01,986 --> 00:07:06,294 Now, Lon, slowly raise your gun and point it at Vicki's head. 178 00:07:06,338 --> 00:07:08,340 ♪ 179 00:07:08,383 --> 00:07:09,950 Point your gun at her head 180 00:07:09,994 --> 00:07:12,475 or I will shoot her in the head! 181 00:07:12,518 --> 00:07:15,129 Slowly. Good boy. 182 00:07:15,173 --> 00:07:16,435 Nice job. 183 00:07:16,479 --> 00:07:18,481 Now, if she so much as breathes 184 00:07:18,524 --> 00:07:20,047 in the direction of that canister, 185 00:07:20,091 --> 00:07:22,528 you empty those clips into her, all right? 186 00:07:22,572 --> 00:07:25,618 - [whimpers] - Hang on. BRB. 187 00:07:25,662 --> 00:07:30,144 ♪ 188 00:07:30,188 --> 00:07:32,190 - [gasps] 189 00:07:32,233 --> 00:07:33,147 All right. - Jesus. 190 00:07:33,191 --> 00:07:34,322 - Yeah, yeah. 191 00:07:34,366 --> 00:07:36,368 What's this here, you wonder. 192 00:07:36,411 --> 00:07:38,979 This is the real Irina Poliskaya! 193 00:07:39,023 --> 00:07:41,547 Yeah, we were able to switch her out at the hotel. 194 00:07:41,591 --> 00:07:44,681 And you dumb pieces of shit had no idea. 195 00:07:44,724 --> 00:07:47,771 Yeah, we fucking pwned you so hard. 196 00:07:47,814 --> 00:07:50,295 Now I propose a little trade. 197 00:07:50,338 --> 00:07:52,515 So what do you say, you wanna let Vicki go? 198 00:07:52,558 --> 00:07:54,342 Continue Queeth's evil plan? 199 00:07:54,386 --> 00:07:56,301 Or you wanna kill Vicki 200 00:07:56,344 --> 00:07:58,999 and make me kill Irina and probably most of you, 201 00:07:59,043 --> 00:08:01,219 and then everyone's gotta go to a bunch of funerals? 202 00:08:01,262 --> 00:08:04,439 - How do we know she's the real scientist? 203 00:08:04,483 --> 00:08:06,267 - Say some fucking science shit. 204 00:08:07,617 --> 00:08:08,966 - Weaponizing the compounds 205 00:08:09,009 --> 00:08:11,664 depends on the practical aerosolization, 206 00:08:11,708 --> 00:08:16,190 which is synthesis of exactly 0.74 207 00:08:16,234 --> 00:08:17,757 microns per million. 208 00:08:17,801 --> 00:08:19,367 - Checks out. 209 00:08:19,411 --> 00:08:21,674 - Now you go. 210 00:08:21,718 --> 00:08:26,418 - Cooking an egg is a science. 211 00:08:26,461 --> 00:08:29,856 Folding towels is a science. 212 00:08:29,900 --> 00:08:32,685 - Okay, you can have her. 213 00:08:32,729 --> 00:08:35,079 Send over the real scientist first. 214 00:08:35,122 --> 00:08:36,471 - No fucking way! 215 00:08:36,515 --> 00:08:38,909 You send Vicki first, then I send the scientist. 216 00:08:38,952 --> 00:08:41,215 - No deal. - Fuck! 217 00:08:41,259 --> 00:08:43,261 Okay, same timesies? 218 00:08:43,304 --> 00:08:45,785 - Fine, but if anything funny happens... 219 00:08:45,829 --> 00:08:47,395 [cocks gun] She's dead. 220 00:08:47,439 --> 00:08:49,920 - You took the words right out of my mouth. 221 00:08:49,963 --> 00:08:51,965 I mean, I was literally about to say, 222 00:08:52,009 --> 00:08:54,664 "If anything funny happens, the scientist dies." 223 00:08:54,707 --> 00:08:56,622 I mean, it's not exactly the same, but same gist. 224 00:08:56,666 --> 00:08:58,363 - Let's get on with this! 225 00:08:58,406 --> 00:09:00,800 - Okay, so, ladies, let's start walking 226 00:09:00,844 --> 00:09:04,412 in three, two, one. 227 00:09:04,456 --> 00:09:05,588 Walk. 228 00:09:05,631 --> 00:09:07,459 - He said, "Walk." 229 00:09:07,502 --> 00:09:10,418 [suspenseful music] 230 00:09:10,462 --> 00:09:11,768 ♪ 231 00:09:11,811 --> 00:09:13,291 - [in American accent] You don't have to do this. 232 00:09:13,334 --> 00:09:14,292 - Go to hell. 233 00:09:14,335 --> 00:09:16,076 - [gasps] Eat a toilet sandwich! 234 00:09:16,120 --> 00:09:17,469 - What? - I don't know. 235 00:09:17,512 --> 00:09:20,385 - Run, Vicki! [gunfire] 236 00:09:23,083 --> 00:09:24,607 [screaming] 237 00:09:24,650 --> 00:09:25,608 Vicki, stay down! 238 00:09:25,651 --> 00:09:26,652 You're safe now! 239 00:09:26,696 --> 00:09:31,091 ♪ 240 00:09:31,135 --> 00:09:32,353 [gun clicking] Oh, oh, oh! 241 00:09:32,397 --> 00:09:35,008 Checkers, Checkers, we're out of ammo! 242 00:09:35,052 --> 00:09:36,227 Where the hell are you? 243 00:09:37,794 --> 00:09:40,710 God damn it, Checkers, we're sitting ducks here! 244 00:09:42,712 --> 00:09:44,278 What's the fucking play here? 245 00:09:44,322 --> 00:09:46,106 [guns cocking] 246 00:09:46,150 --> 00:09:47,673 Hey, Lon! 247 00:09:47,717 --> 00:09:49,675 You better check yourself! 248 00:09:49,719 --> 00:09:52,069 We got, uh, plenty of bullets over here! 249 00:09:52,112 --> 00:09:53,461 - No, we don't! He's lying! 250 00:09:53,505 --> 00:09:55,028 - Vicki! 251 00:09:55,072 --> 00:09:57,117 [laughs] You're gonna believe her? 252 00:09:57,161 --> 00:10:00,512 A known liar who just lied to your face? 253 00:10:00,555 --> 00:10:02,949 Or are you gonna believe this? 254 00:10:02,993 --> 00:10:06,997 [imitating gunshots] 255 00:10:14,744 --> 00:10:16,180 - Kill them. 256 00:10:17,181 --> 00:10:20,488 [both screaming] - Oh, fuck! 257 00:10:20,532 --> 00:10:22,229 We're gonna die! 258 00:10:22,273 --> 00:10:23,361 [screaming] 259 00:10:23,404 --> 00:10:25,885 [crying] Checkers! 260 00:10:25,929 --> 00:10:27,321 [tires squealing] 261 00:10:27,365 --> 00:10:31,325 ♪ 262 00:10:31,369 --> 00:10:32,413 - Lon, no! 263 00:10:32,457 --> 00:10:34,720 Lon! Lon, no! 264 00:10:34,764 --> 00:10:35,939 - Get in! 265 00:10:35,982 --> 00:10:39,333 - [imitating gunshots] - [screams] 266 00:10:42,772 --> 00:10:44,512 - Oh, my God, Checkers! 267 00:10:44,556 --> 00:10:45,688 Did you break my Club? 268 00:10:45,731 --> 00:10:47,690 - Just get in the fucking car! 269 00:10:47,733 --> 00:10:49,169 - It's my car, I'm driving! 270 00:10:49,213 --> 00:10:52,390 - Jesus Christ! - [imitating gunshots] 271 00:10:52,433 --> 00:10:53,434 Ow! 272 00:10:53,478 --> 00:10:58,831 ♪ 273 00:10:58,875 --> 00:11:00,354 - What the hell are you doing? 274 00:11:00,398 --> 00:11:01,529 - Oh, my God, MacGruber! 275 00:11:01,573 --> 00:11:04,707 - Why are we going backwards? 276 00:11:04,750 --> 00:11:05,838 - MacGruber, what are you doing? 277 00:11:05,882 --> 00:11:07,187 We should be going after Brimstone! 278 00:11:07,231 --> 00:11:08,754 - Yeah, we can't let them escape! 279 00:11:08,798 --> 00:11:09,842 - Relax. 280 00:11:09,886 --> 00:11:11,496 They're not going anywhere. 281 00:11:16,893 --> 00:11:20,157 [laughs] [helicopter blades whirring] 282 00:11:26,511 --> 00:11:29,557 They got a whirlybird. 283 00:11:29,601 --> 00:11:31,472 A helicopter. 284 00:11:31,516 --> 00:11:34,432 [unsettling music] 285 00:11:34,475 --> 00:11:38,392 ♪ 286 00:11:38,436 --> 00:11:39,785 Shit. 287 00:11:51,797 --> 00:11:54,365 - Thought we were gonna lose you there for a second. 288 00:11:54,408 --> 00:11:55,845 Glad you're okay. 289 00:11:57,847 --> 00:11:58,804 - I'm out. 290 00:11:58,848 --> 00:11:59,892 - Out? 291 00:11:59,936 --> 00:12:02,155 What--what do you mean "out"? 292 00:12:02,199 --> 00:12:03,548 - I'm finished. I'm off the mission. 293 00:12:03,591 --> 00:12:06,116 - But Vicki, we had them right where we want them. 294 00:12:06,159 --> 00:12:07,334 Running scared. 295 00:12:07,378 --> 00:12:09,336 - I almost had Brimstone! 296 00:12:09,380 --> 00:12:11,077 I almost stopped this entire thing! 297 00:12:11,121 --> 00:12:12,470 - And you would've died! 298 00:12:12,513 --> 00:12:14,472 - Yeah, and now millions of people are gonna die 299 00:12:14,515 --> 00:12:16,126 because you didn't let me do my job! 300 00:12:16,169 --> 00:12:17,518 - I couldn't let you do that. 301 00:12:17,562 --> 00:12:19,390 - That wasn't your decision to make! 302 00:12:21,827 --> 00:12:23,524 No, I'm not gonna do this anymore. 303 00:12:23,568 --> 00:12:25,004 It's time to bring in the government. 304 00:12:25,048 --> 00:12:26,440 - Oh, I see. 305 00:12:26,484 --> 00:12:28,747 So when the going gets tough, the tough run back 306 00:12:28,791 --> 00:12:30,575 to their floppy-dicked husbands. 307 00:12:30,618 --> 00:12:31,706 - Okay, I am not gonna have you talk 308 00:12:31,750 --> 00:12:32,925 about my husband like that anymore. 309 00:12:32,969 --> 00:12:34,709 - Come on, he's a friggin' dirty diaper 310 00:12:34,753 --> 00:12:36,842 with arms, legs, and half a brain. 311 00:12:36,886 --> 00:12:40,585 - Barrett is a good man who is kind and decent 312 00:12:40,628 --> 00:12:42,108 and good at what he does. 313 00:12:42,152 --> 00:12:44,284 And you know what, unlike you, he actually listens to me. 314 00:12:44,328 --> 00:12:46,069 You could learn something from him. 315 00:12:46,112 --> 00:12:47,418 - Well, look at that. 316 00:12:47,461 --> 00:12:49,550 I'm having déjà vu. 317 00:12:49,594 --> 00:12:50,595 - What is that supposed to mean? 318 00:12:50,638 --> 00:12:52,379 - It means you've left me before. 319 00:12:52,423 --> 00:12:54,773 And I remember how it feels. 320 00:12:54,817 --> 00:12:58,211 Sitting in prison, scared, lonely, 321 00:12:58,255 --> 00:13:01,258 and a man in a suit comes to deliver me divorce papers? 322 00:13:01,301 --> 00:13:02,694 Yeah, that was fun. 323 00:13:02,737 --> 00:13:05,349 - You ended our marriage when you pointed at me 324 00:13:05,392 --> 00:13:07,568 during your murder trial and said, "She did it!" 325 00:13:07,612 --> 00:13:09,919 - But you did do it, Vicki! 326 00:13:09,962 --> 00:13:12,443 You stole my heart and you aided and abetted 327 00:13:12,486 --> 00:13:14,662 in making me the happiest man on Earth. 328 00:13:14,706 --> 00:13:16,751 But they mistook my words as an accusation 329 00:13:16,795 --> 00:13:18,318 'cause it came so close to the question 330 00:13:18,362 --> 00:13:20,973 the judge had just asked about how I pleaded. 331 00:13:21,017 --> 00:13:22,409 [somber music] 332 00:13:22,453 --> 00:13:24,803 - Goodbye, MacGruber. 333 00:13:24,847 --> 00:13:27,240 ♪ 334 00:13:27,284 --> 00:13:28,676 - You know what, Vicki? 335 00:13:30,461 --> 00:13:33,420 Maybe I was wrong about you. 336 00:13:33,464 --> 00:13:35,858 Maybe you are just a housewife. 337 00:13:35,901 --> 00:13:39,644 ♪ 338 00:13:39,687 --> 00:13:41,472 - You know, for years, 339 00:13:41,515 --> 00:13:43,866 whenever anyone ever said anything bad about you-- 340 00:13:43,909 --> 00:13:45,215 and they did-- 341 00:13:45,258 --> 00:13:48,044 I defended you. 342 00:13:48,087 --> 00:13:50,568 So maybe I was wrong about you. 343 00:13:50,611 --> 00:13:53,527 Maybe you have lost it. 344 00:13:53,571 --> 00:13:55,442 Heck, maybe you never had it in the first place. 345 00:13:55,486 --> 00:14:02,493 ♪ 346 00:14:09,674 --> 00:14:11,197 - And then there were two. 347 00:14:11,241 --> 00:14:13,069 - I'm out. - Checkers, no! 348 00:14:13,112 --> 00:14:15,288 - MacGruber, this whole operation has gone worse 349 00:14:15,332 --> 00:14:16,768 than I ever imagined. 350 00:14:16,811 --> 00:14:18,683 And I had imagined it going horribly. 351 00:14:19,989 --> 00:14:20,990 This is over. 352 00:14:22,426 --> 00:14:25,037 Checkers--sorry, Piper, Piper! 353 00:14:25,081 --> 00:14:26,952 Look, Piper. 354 00:14:26,996 --> 00:14:28,475 Please. 355 00:14:28,519 --> 00:14:30,390 Queeth destroyed my father. 356 00:14:30,434 --> 00:14:32,479 He killed my mother. 357 00:14:32,523 --> 00:14:35,830 You gotta help me stop him. 358 00:14:35,874 --> 00:14:37,963 - Look, I can't do anything about your family. 359 00:14:38,007 --> 00:14:40,966 But if you love this country as much as you say you do, 360 00:14:41,010 --> 00:14:42,968 you'll go to Fasoose and tell him everything. 361 00:14:43,012 --> 00:14:44,796 - But Vicki's already doing that. 362 00:14:46,015 --> 00:14:48,974 - Then I guess I'll see her there. 363 00:14:49,018 --> 00:14:52,021 [Crash Test Dummies' "Mmm Mmm Mmm Mmm"] 364 00:14:52,064 --> 00:14:54,980 [somber rock ballad] 365 00:14:55,024 --> 00:14:59,419 ♪ 366 00:14:59,463 --> 00:15:03,293 - ♪ Once there was this kid 367 00:15:03,336 --> 00:15:06,861 ♪ Who got into an accident 368 00:15:06,905 --> 00:15:08,994 ♪ And couldn't come to school ♪ 369 00:15:09,038 --> 00:15:14,695 ♪ But when he finally came back ♪ 370 00:15:14,739 --> 00:15:17,916 ♪ His hair 371 00:15:17,960 --> 00:15:21,006 ♪ Had turned from black into bright white ♪ 372 00:15:21,050 --> 00:15:24,009 ♪ 373 00:15:24,053 --> 00:15:26,925 -She was beautiful, wasn't she? 374 00:15:26,969 --> 00:15:28,579 - She was. 375 00:15:28,622 --> 00:15:30,363 Hello, Father. 376 00:15:30,407 --> 00:15:32,887 - Hello, son. 377 00:15:32,931 --> 00:15:35,455 - ♪ Mmm mmm mmm mmm 378 00:15:35,499 --> 00:15:37,544 - Didn't think I'd ever see you again. 379 00:15:37,588 --> 00:15:40,025 - So you got my letter. 380 00:15:40,069 --> 00:15:41,635 - I did. 381 00:15:41,679 --> 00:15:43,376 It was hard to read. 382 00:15:43,420 --> 00:15:47,032 - Yeah, there was a lot of emotional stuff in there. 383 00:15:47,076 --> 00:15:50,035 - No, I mean your handwriting was barely legible. 384 00:15:50,079 --> 00:15:51,167 - Sounds like me. 385 00:15:51,210 --> 00:15:52,516 - [laughs] 386 00:15:59,436 --> 00:16:01,960 - I miss her. 387 00:16:02,004 --> 00:16:03,614 - I miss her too. 388 00:16:06,399 --> 00:16:09,011 - Daddy... 389 00:16:09,054 --> 00:16:11,100 do you think I'm good at what I do? 390 00:16:11,143 --> 00:16:12,884 - Why? 391 00:16:12,927 --> 00:16:14,016 What's going on? 392 00:16:14,059 --> 00:16:15,800 - [sobs] 393 00:16:15,843 --> 00:16:20,413 - Oh. [shushing] 394 00:16:20,457 --> 00:16:21,632 What's wrong? - [sobbing] 395 00:16:21,675 --> 00:16:22,633 I screwed up. 396 00:16:22,676 --> 00:16:24,417 I screwed up big-time! 397 00:16:24,461 --> 00:16:26,724 I basically gave the friggin' bad guys 398 00:16:26,767 --> 00:16:29,857 everything they need to destroy the fucking world! 399 00:16:29,901 --> 00:16:32,469 And now Piper and Vicki have left the mission. 400 00:16:32,512 --> 00:16:35,689 They even told me they think I've lost it. 401 00:16:35,733 --> 00:16:37,430 And I don't know. 402 00:16:37,474 --> 00:16:39,432 Maybe they're right. 403 00:16:39,476 --> 00:16:42,261 And the worst part about it... 404 00:16:42,305 --> 00:16:44,046 it's Queeth, Daddy. 405 00:16:44,089 --> 00:16:47,049 It's fucking Queeth! 406 00:16:47,092 --> 00:16:49,660 - There, there. 407 00:16:49,703 --> 00:16:52,924 Let it all out. 408 00:16:52,967 --> 00:16:55,579 We'll get through this together. 409 00:16:55,622 --> 00:16:58,103 [sentimental guitar music] 410 00:16:58,147 --> 00:17:01,759 - I just--you know, I always wanted to make you proud. 411 00:17:01,802 --> 00:17:03,630 But I failed. 412 00:17:03,674 --> 00:17:07,069 And I'm so sorry for letting you down. 413 00:17:07,112 --> 00:17:08,331 - Look at me. 414 00:17:08,374 --> 00:17:09,332 - [inhales deeply] 415 00:17:09,375 --> 00:17:10,768 - Look at me. 416 00:17:12,335 --> 00:17:15,120 You never let me down. 417 00:17:15,164 --> 00:17:16,861 In fact... 418 00:17:16,904 --> 00:17:18,950 I always felt like I let you down. 419 00:17:18,993 --> 00:17:20,778 - No. No. 420 00:17:20,821 --> 00:17:24,303 You lift me up higher than the highest mountaintop. 421 00:17:24,347 --> 00:17:26,000 Daddy, you're my hero. 422 00:17:26,044 --> 00:17:28,307 - MacGruber, can I get real with you? 423 00:17:28,351 --> 00:17:31,136 Like, really, really real? 424 00:17:31,180 --> 00:17:32,311 - [sniffs] 425 00:17:32,355 --> 00:17:34,792 - You're my hero. 426 00:17:34,835 --> 00:17:37,099 And you always have been. 427 00:17:37,142 --> 00:17:38,143 - What? 428 00:17:38,187 --> 00:17:40,493 - You're my good boy. 429 00:17:40,537 --> 00:17:43,844 And I'm so proud to be your daddy. 430 00:17:43,888 --> 00:17:46,586 - Well, I'm about to make you even prouder. 431 00:17:46,630 --> 00:17:47,805 - What are you doing? 432 00:17:47,848 --> 00:17:49,633 - I'm going after Queeth. 433 00:17:49,676 --> 00:17:52,331 - No. No, please. It's too dangerous. 434 00:17:52,375 --> 00:17:53,767 - I have to do something! 435 00:17:53,811 --> 00:17:55,029 - Yes, you do! 436 00:17:55,073 --> 00:17:57,336 And I think you already know what it is. 437 00:17:57,380 --> 00:17:58,381 Turn yourself in. 438 00:17:58,424 --> 00:17:59,991 - You know I can't do that! 439 00:18:00,034 --> 00:18:01,558 - You have no other choice! 440 00:18:01,601 --> 00:18:02,689 - What, you want me to just give up? 441 00:18:02,733 --> 00:18:04,038 You want Queeth to win? 442 00:18:04,082 --> 00:18:06,519 - I want Queeth to burn in hell for eternity! 443 00:18:06,563 --> 00:18:08,217 - Then why won't you let me do this? 444 00:18:08,260 --> 00:18:10,044 - Because I already had to bury your mother, 445 00:18:10,088 --> 00:18:13,700 and I don't wanna bury you too. 446 00:18:13,744 --> 00:18:17,313 Turn yourself in, son. 447 00:18:17,356 --> 00:18:20,359 Only way I'll know Queeth can't get to my baby boy. 448 00:18:20,403 --> 00:18:22,709 [somber music] 449 00:18:22,753 --> 00:18:25,364 Please do this. 450 00:18:25,408 --> 00:18:27,932 For me. 451 00:18:27,975 --> 00:18:29,063 For her. 452 00:18:29,107 --> 00:18:36,027 ♪ 453 00:18:37,289 --> 00:18:39,161 - Okay. 454 00:18:39,204 --> 00:18:41,772 Okay. 455 00:18:41,815 --> 00:18:43,774 - She would be so proud of you. 456 00:18:43,817 --> 00:18:46,516 ♪ 457 00:18:46,559 --> 00:18:48,735 Now go be Daddy's little hero. 458 00:18:49,954 --> 00:18:52,826 [dramatic patriotic music] 459 00:18:52,870 --> 00:19:00,007 ♪ 460 00:19:18,112 --> 00:19:20,506 [suspenseful music] 461 00:19:20,550 --> 00:19:21,594 [elevator chimes] 462 00:19:21,638 --> 00:19:25,119 ♪ 463 00:19:30,603 --> 00:19:32,301 - Hm. 464 00:19:34,912 --> 00:19:36,348 - They say that the footsteps 465 00:19:36,392 --> 00:19:38,872 of the "Apollo" astronauts will stay there on the moon 466 00:19:38,916 --> 00:19:40,918 for 100 million years. 467 00:19:40,961 --> 00:19:43,225 And it makes you think, 468 00:19:43,268 --> 00:19:45,531 wonder where we'll be then. 469 00:19:47,490 --> 00:19:49,622 Guess you know why I'm here. 470 00:19:52,712 --> 00:19:54,584 Thought I'd save you the trouble. 471 00:19:59,197 --> 00:20:01,765 Shall we? 472 00:20:01,808 --> 00:20:03,288 - Soldier! 473 00:20:07,597 --> 00:20:09,729 You know, Victoria and Dixon Piper 474 00:20:09,773 --> 00:20:11,340 paid me a visit earlier. 475 00:20:11,383 --> 00:20:14,299 They told me about how you led Queeth's team to the weapon. 476 00:20:14,343 --> 00:20:15,953 How you gave it up without a fight. 477 00:20:15,996 --> 00:20:18,695 How you personally put the enemy in a position 478 00:20:18,738 --> 00:20:20,392 to synthesize it. 479 00:20:20,436 --> 00:20:23,003 - That's exactly what happened. 480 00:20:23,047 --> 00:20:26,093 - They also told me... 481 00:20:26,137 --> 00:20:27,791 that you put yourself in harm's way, 482 00:20:27,834 --> 00:20:29,967 risked your own life to save Victoria's. 483 00:20:30,010 --> 00:20:31,142 Is that accurate? 484 00:20:31,185 --> 00:20:32,622 - Yes. 485 00:20:32,665 --> 00:20:35,407 - Mac, as a career military man, 486 00:20:35,451 --> 00:20:36,800 I'm forced to look at your actions 487 00:20:36,843 --> 00:20:39,411 as complete and utter insubordination. 488 00:20:39,455 --> 00:20:43,807 An offense which requires your immediate court-martial. 489 00:20:43,850 --> 00:20:45,374 But as a husband... 490 00:20:45,417 --> 00:20:48,202 [solemn music] 491 00:20:48,246 --> 00:20:50,204 I thank you from the bottom of my heart. 492 00:20:50,248 --> 00:20:54,208 ♪ 493 00:20:54,252 --> 00:20:57,864 [handcuffs jingling] 494 00:20:57,908 --> 00:20:59,083 Let's just call it even. 495 00:20:59,126 --> 00:21:02,347 ♪ 496 00:21:02,391 --> 00:21:04,218 - Sir, I'm so sorry. 497 00:21:04,262 --> 00:21:06,612 I'd never forgive myself if I didn't ask, though. 498 00:21:06,656 --> 00:21:09,441 Is there any way I can be of service? 499 00:21:09,485 --> 00:21:11,225 - MacGruber-- - Look, I know I've been 500 00:21:11,269 --> 00:21:12,618 a bit of a loose cannon. 501 00:21:12,662 --> 00:21:14,359 But what if I was a tight cannon? 502 00:21:14,403 --> 00:21:16,230 Operating under your command 503 00:21:16,274 --> 00:21:18,363 in whatever capacity you see fit. 504 00:21:18,407 --> 00:21:20,147 Hell, I'd take you to the fucking prom 505 00:21:20,191 --> 00:21:21,366 if it helped bring down Queeth. 506 00:21:21,410 --> 00:21:22,846 - I'm sorry, Mac. 507 00:21:25,544 --> 00:21:27,372 - Fuck! 508 00:21:27,416 --> 00:21:29,722 ♪ 509 00:21:29,766 --> 00:21:31,245 You have any idea what it's like 510 00:21:31,289 --> 00:21:32,943 to see your mother's brains splatter 511 00:21:32,986 --> 00:21:35,467 all over your face and cake? 512 00:21:35,511 --> 00:21:37,556 Or what it's like to come back from deployment 513 00:21:37,600 --> 00:21:40,298 to find your dad giving hand jobs to crack dealers 514 00:21:40,342 --> 00:21:42,866 for his next crack rock? 515 00:21:42,909 --> 00:21:45,521 Queeth fucking broke us! 516 00:21:45,564 --> 00:21:47,827 [sobbing] He broke us. 517 00:21:49,786 --> 00:21:51,048 Please! 518 00:21:51,091 --> 00:21:53,180 I'm begging you! 519 00:21:53,224 --> 00:21:56,009 I am fucking begging you. 520 00:21:56,053 --> 00:21:57,837 Please. 521 00:21:57,881 --> 00:22:00,884 [sobbing] 522 00:22:02,755 --> 00:22:05,018 [screams] 523 00:22:05,062 --> 00:22:11,938 ♪ 524 00:22:14,245 --> 00:22:15,638 I'll jack you off. 525 00:22:15,681 --> 00:22:17,335 Just right here. 526 00:22:17,379 --> 00:22:18,771 You can come on my face. 527 00:22:18,815 --> 00:22:20,425 All right? Is that what you want? 528 00:22:20,469 --> 00:22:21,644 Then I want it too. 529 00:22:21,687 --> 00:22:22,906 All right, come on, please. 530 00:22:22,949 --> 00:22:24,821 [spits] Come on, please. 531 00:22:24,864 --> 00:22:25,909 Come on me. 532 00:22:25,952 --> 00:22:27,127 Come on my face. 533 00:22:27,171 --> 00:22:29,434 Come on my face. 534 00:22:29,478 --> 00:22:31,741 - Hi, General! - Hey, yeah! Hey, Jerry. 535 00:22:31,784 --> 00:22:33,525 - Why won't you just come on me? 536 00:22:33,569 --> 00:22:35,440 - Good to see you. Good night. 537 00:22:35,484 --> 00:22:37,442 - [sobbing] 538 00:22:37,486 --> 00:22:39,749 I'm begging you! 539 00:22:39,792 --> 00:22:41,228 - Get up, Mac. 540 00:22:41,272 --> 00:22:43,535 [ominous music] 541 00:22:43,579 --> 00:22:45,407 You didn't get those from me. 542 00:22:45,450 --> 00:22:49,541 ♪ 543 00:22:49,585 --> 00:22:51,108 - Queeth's location? 544 00:22:51,151 --> 00:22:52,457 - It's a dead zone, and yet, 545 00:22:52,501 --> 00:22:54,590 there's a persistent heat signature that suggests 546 00:22:54,633 --> 00:22:57,723 the presence of anywhere from 50 to 100 hostiles. 547 00:22:57,767 --> 00:23:00,944 Tomorrow, we've scheduled a drone strike at 2100 hours. 548 00:23:03,555 --> 00:23:05,470 That's 9:00 p.m. - 9:00 p.m., yep! 549 00:23:05,514 --> 00:23:07,559 Yes, yes. 9:00 p.m. 550 00:23:07,603 --> 00:23:09,431 Prime time. - Sure, whatever. 551 00:23:09,474 --> 00:23:11,868 Listen, Mac, if you get yourself in there, 552 00:23:11,911 --> 00:23:13,565 Queeth's almost as good as yours. 553 00:23:13,609 --> 00:23:15,524 But that strike is gonna happen no matter what. 554 00:23:15,567 --> 00:23:18,744 We are not going to risk Queeth escaping a second time. 555 00:23:18,788 --> 00:23:19,919 You hear me? 556 00:23:19,963 --> 00:23:22,139 - I don't know what to say, General. 557 00:23:22,182 --> 00:23:23,836 But if I did... 558 00:23:23,880 --> 00:23:26,186 probably sound a lot like thank you. 559 00:23:26,230 --> 00:23:28,580 - After everything that you've done for our country, 560 00:23:28,624 --> 00:23:31,278 the least we can do is offer you a chance 561 00:23:31,322 --> 00:23:33,280 to get some closure. 562 00:23:33,324 --> 00:23:35,108 - I won't let you down. 563 00:23:35,152 --> 00:23:37,110 [dramatic music] 564 00:23:37,154 --> 00:23:39,069 [safe beeping] 565 00:23:41,463 --> 00:23:44,509 [assorted guns cocking] 566 00:23:44,553 --> 00:23:48,992 ♪ 567 00:23:52,038 --> 00:23:53,475 [gun clatters to ground] 568 00:24:05,138 --> 00:24:06,357 [grunts] 569 00:24:17,803 --> 00:24:20,284 [foreboding musical sting] 570 00:24:20,327 --> 00:24:23,461 - [snoring] 571 00:24:29,859 --> 00:24:31,513 - [sighs] 572 00:24:35,908 --> 00:24:36,909 [sighs] 573 00:24:41,087 --> 00:24:42,480 [gasps] 574 00:24:42,524 --> 00:24:43,829 - Hello, Vicki. 575 00:24:43,873 --> 00:24:45,831 - MacGruber, you shouldn't be-- - Vicki, wait. 576 00:24:45,875 --> 00:24:47,790 There are a few things I need to get off my chest, 577 00:24:47,833 --> 00:24:49,531 and I don't have much time. 578 00:24:51,054 --> 00:24:52,185 - I'm listening. 579 00:24:52,229 --> 00:24:54,492 - I need you to know... 580 00:24:54,536 --> 00:24:56,363 that I'm sorry. 581 00:24:56,407 --> 00:24:57,669 I mean, the only reason 582 00:24:57,713 --> 00:24:59,715 that I lied about you in court 583 00:24:59,758 --> 00:25:03,022 was 'cause I wanted you there in prison with me. 584 00:25:03,066 --> 00:25:06,025 Because I didn't know how to live without you. 585 00:25:06,069 --> 00:25:08,593 - [sighs] 586 00:25:08,637 --> 00:25:10,377 - There are so many things I wish I could change 587 00:25:10,421 --> 00:25:12,510 about the past, but I can't. 588 00:25:12,554 --> 00:25:14,164 You're not my property. 589 00:25:14,207 --> 00:25:15,774 Not anymore. 590 00:25:17,210 --> 00:25:18,429 - Thank you for saying that. 591 00:25:18,472 --> 00:25:20,083 - We had an electric love. 592 00:25:20,126 --> 00:25:21,867 But that was years ago. 593 00:25:21,911 --> 00:25:23,869 And I'm so happy that you've moved on 594 00:25:23,913 --> 00:25:25,392 and found new love with Barrett. 595 00:25:25,436 --> 00:25:27,003 - I have moved on. 596 00:25:27,046 --> 00:25:29,396 And I'm happy that you've realized that. 597 00:25:29,440 --> 00:25:30,876 - I do. - I mean, it's not like 598 00:25:30,920 --> 00:25:32,443 I think about you every night and pine for your touch. 599 00:25:32,486 --> 00:25:33,923 - No. 600 00:25:33,966 --> 00:25:35,446 - Staring into my husband's eyes 601 00:25:35,489 --> 00:25:37,100 wishing they were yours. 602 00:25:37,143 --> 00:25:39,624 Kissing him and imagining your perfect lips 603 00:25:39,668 --> 00:25:41,757 and tongue dancing with mine... 604 00:25:41,800 --> 00:25:44,847 flicking, groping, asking... 605 00:25:44,890 --> 00:25:46,718 answering. - Of course not. 606 00:25:46,762 --> 00:25:49,678 - Tongues intertwined, twisted, 607 00:25:49,721 --> 00:25:52,637 coiled liked two serpents. 608 00:25:52,681 --> 00:25:54,726 Like the two snakes on that medical doctor symbol. 609 00:25:54,770 --> 00:25:55,901 - I don't know that one. 610 00:25:55,945 --> 00:25:57,642 - When I'm intimate with my husband, 611 00:25:57,686 --> 00:25:59,775 I do not yearn for your sharp scent. 612 00:25:59,818 --> 00:26:00,776 - No. 613 00:26:00,819 --> 00:26:02,255 - I don't close my eyes 614 00:26:02,299 --> 00:26:04,257 and trace Barrett's testicles with my tongue, 615 00:26:04,301 --> 00:26:07,086 remembering every wrinkle and pimple on yours. 616 00:26:07,130 --> 00:26:08,827 - No. - And I don't round the horn 617 00:26:08,871 --> 00:26:11,438 with my mouth and nose, hoping to helplessly fall down 618 00:26:11,482 --> 00:26:12,918 your rabbit hole like... 619 00:26:12,962 --> 00:26:15,312 Alice in the looking glass, forgetting myself, 620 00:26:15,355 --> 00:26:16,922 forgetting everything, 621 00:26:16,966 --> 00:26:18,837 becoming at once tiny and giant, 622 00:26:18,881 --> 00:26:21,274 losing myself in your musky, 623 00:26:21,318 --> 00:26:23,712 damp, verdant... 624 00:26:23,755 --> 00:26:25,539 life-giving earth. 625 00:26:25,583 --> 00:26:26,976 - You don't do any of those things. 626 00:26:27,019 --> 00:26:28,281 - I feel free. 627 00:26:28,325 --> 00:26:30,370 I'm so happy that you feel that same freedom. 628 00:26:30,414 --> 00:26:31,676 - Praise be. - Amen. 629 00:26:31,720 --> 00:26:34,070 - Now before I go, 630 00:26:34,113 --> 00:26:36,202 there's something I want you to have. 631 00:26:37,856 --> 00:26:41,033 [soft sentimental music] 632 00:26:41,077 --> 00:26:43,819 - Your locket? 633 00:26:43,862 --> 00:26:46,560 - It's saved my life countless times. 634 00:26:46,604 --> 00:26:47,997 Look inside. 635 00:26:48,040 --> 00:26:52,175 ♪ 636 00:26:52,218 --> 00:26:55,178 - Are these-- - Your pubic hairs? 637 00:26:55,221 --> 00:26:56,919 Yes. 638 00:26:56,962 --> 00:26:58,921 - MacGruber. 639 00:26:58,964 --> 00:27:00,966 - After the first night we made love, 640 00:27:01,010 --> 00:27:04,143 I found a bunch of those bad boys in your underpants. 641 00:27:04,187 --> 00:27:07,233 So one by one, I plucked out the freshest, 642 00:27:07,277 --> 00:27:10,019 and I bought that beautiful locket to house them. 643 00:27:10,062 --> 00:27:13,065 I've worn that around my neck ever since. 644 00:27:13,109 --> 00:27:16,852 Every time the world feels like it's caving in around me, 645 00:27:16,895 --> 00:27:19,289 I just touch that locket, 646 00:27:19,332 --> 00:27:20,986 think about what's inside 647 00:27:21,030 --> 00:27:23,032 and the woman they were attached to. 648 00:27:23,075 --> 00:27:24,337 - Me. 649 00:27:24,381 --> 00:27:25,861 - And I'm whole again. 650 00:27:27,732 --> 00:27:30,256 That's the power you have. 651 00:27:30,300 --> 00:27:31,867 You did that. 652 00:27:31,910 --> 00:27:32,955 You! 653 00:27:32,998 --> 00:27:33,956 [sniffs] 654 00:27:35,044 --> 00:27:38,569 But that locket, that's not mine anymore. 655 00:27:38,612 --> 00:27:41,006 That's Barrett's locket now. 656 00:27:41,050 --> 00:27:42,834 And I want you to give that to him 657 00:27:42,878 --> 00:27:44,880 and tell him the story that I just told you 658 00:27:44,923 --> 00:27:47,578 word-for-word when you do. 659 00:27:49,232 --> 00:27:50,450 - I will. 660 00:27:50,494 --> 00:27:52,104 - Well... 661 00:27:54,585 --> 00:27:57,022 Smell you later, Vick. 662 00:27:57,066 --> 00:28:00,547 And I mean that with every fiber of my being. 663 00:28:00,591 --> 00:28:03,507 I will smell you later. 664 00:28:03,550 --> 00:28:10,644 ♪ 665 00:28:13,560 --> 00:28:16,520 [dramatic music] 666 00:28:16,563 --> 00:28:23,657 ♪ 667 00:28:32,405 --> 00:28:35,278 [helicopter blades whirring] 668 00:28:41,937 --> 00:28:44,113 Hope you motherfuckers are ready. 669 00:28:44,156 --> 00:28:47,029 'Cause MacGruber's coming for you. 670 00:28:47,072 --> 00:28:48,552 Later today. 671 00:28:48,595 --> 00:28:49,814 Or, uh, tonight. 672 00:28:49,858 --> 00:28:51,816 Night's probably better. Probably tonight. 673 00:28:51,860 --> 00:28:53,949 Probably tonight.