1 00:00:58,475 --> 00:01:00,853 We've gone as far as we can go by road. 2 00:01:01,562 --> 00:01:03,063 We need a boat. 3 00:01:03,897 --> 00:01:06,608 Should only take a few days. 4 00:01:07,276 --> 00:01:09,027 We shouldn't be here. 5 00:01:09,403 --> 00:01:11,280 The jungle doesn't want us here. 6 00:01:12,072 --> 00:01:13,365 There is... 7 00:01:44,980 --> 00:01:46,899 We have to do this. 8 00:01:47,524 --> 00:01:49,943 What's waiting for us will change our lives. 9 00:01:52,654 --> 00:01:53,655 Fine. 10 00:01:54,531 --> 00:01:55,489 I'll go alone. 11 00:01:55,490 --> 00:01:56,408 Ana. 12 00:01:56,992 --> 00:01:57,951 Ana! 13 00:01:58,785 --> 00:02:00,037 Don't do this! 14 00:02:17,513 --> 00:02:18,263 It's her. 15 00:02:29,316 --> 00:02:30,734 Get to the boat! 16 00:02:39,243 --> 00:02:40,827 Come on! Let's go! 17 00:02:42,829 --> 00:02:43,747 - Hey! - Stop! 18 00:02:44,706 --> 00:02:45,415 Take my hand! 19 00:03:03,141 --> 00:03:04,935 We start tight on a full moon. 20 00:03:06,103 --> 00:03:08,355 Milky. Almost yellow. 21 00:03:09,606 --> 00:03:10,983 And we crane down 22 00:03:11,859 --> 00:03:16,071 to reveal an idyllic, suburban street. 23 00:03:16,989 --> 00:03:20,533 We float past a series of white picket fences, 24 00:03:20,534 --> 00:03:22,327 until we settle on a sewer grate. 25 00:03:23,495 --> 00:03:24,913 Pow! Flies open! 26 00:03:25,581 --> 00:03:28,416 Something big and scaly slithers out, 27 00:03:28,417 --> 00:03:31,711 fast, hungry, definitely not human, 28 00:03:31,712 --> 00:03:33,964 as a pulsating score kicks in. 29 00:03:43,265 --> 00:03:45,057 We're on the back of the beast 30 00:03:45,058 --> 00:03:48,228 as it slithers menacingly towards a little blue house. 31 00:04:01,617 --> 00:04:03,367 Wait. I'm sorry. 32 00:04:03,368 --> 00:04:06,412 This is our wedding video you're talking about? 33 00:04:06,413 --> 00:04:10,374 Yes, though I actually don't think of them as videos. They're more like short films. 34 00:04:10,375 --> 00:04:14,712 Yeah, because I'm not sure this is quite what we had in mind. 35 00:04:14,713 --> 00:04:16,963 Okay. I know. It's a little different than normal but-- 36 00:04:16,964 --> 00:04:19,967 We really liked the one you did for Karen and Bart. 37 00:04:19,968 --> 00:04:21,427 When they walk by the river 38 00:04:21,428 --> 00:04:23,763 - and jump up and high-five. - That jump was dope. 39 00:04:23,764 --> 00:04:25,223 And I loved that song they used. 40 00:04:25,224 --> 00:04:29,268 I don't want to wait For our lives to be over 41 00:04:29,269 --> 00:04:33,231 I want to know right now How does it feel 42 00:04:33,232 --> 00:04:36,108 - You know it. Yeah. - Guys. Here's the thing. 43 00:04:36,109 --> 00:04:39,195 I really like you guys. And you said you're horror fans, 44 00:04:39,196 --> 00:04:41,322 and I'm like, "I love horror so much." 45 00:04:41,323 --> 00:04:44,158 And I thought this could be special. You know what I mean? 46 00:04:44,159 --> 00:04:46,786 This is a film you're gonna watch for the rest of your lives. 47 00:04:46,787 --> 00:04:48,913 But this isn't a film, Doug. 48 00:04:48,914 --> 00:04:52,750 This is a wedding video, and we want one where they do a little jump. 49 00:04:52,751 --> 00:04:54,795 - Yeah. - Now, can you do that for us or not? 50 00:05:02,010 --> 00:05:03,427 Okay. 51 00:05:03,428 --> 00:05:06,556 And do you mind if I'm doing warm-ups? Is it okay? 52 00:05:06,557 --> 00:05:08,558 Oh, yeah. I've seen much crazier. 53 00:05:08,559 --> 00:05:09,642 Okay, good. 54 00:05:09,643 --> 00:05:12,186 Does it sound better to say my line, 55 00:05:12,187 --> 00:05:15,314 "His vision is blurry, which could suggest..." 56 00:05:15,315 --> 00:05:18,526 or, "His vision is blurry, which could suggest..." 57 00:05:18,527 --> 00:05:21,362 Or I could-- You know what? I could even do, like, an accent. I could do just... 58 00:05:21,363 --> 00:05:23,990 I think you just should do it the way you auditioned it, honey. 59 00:05:23,991 --> 00:05:25,074 - Yeah. - Yeah. 60 00:05:25,075 --> 00:05:28,911 It's been a while since I booked anything, and I just want it to go well. 61 00:05:28,912 --> 00:05:30,329 - Yeah. - I just... 62 00:05:30,330 --> 00:05:31,790 It's hard out there. 63 00:05:33,041 --> 00:05:34,125 Sorry. 64 00:05:34,126 --> 00:05:36,002 Doctor number 3, we're ready for you. 65 00:05:36,003 --> 00:05:37,211 Okay, knock 'em dead. 66 00:05:37,212 --> 00:05:38,921 Okay, thanks. Thank you, Donna. 67 00:05:38,922 --> 00:05:41,549 Hey, by the way, if you ever need anything from Lowe's, 68 00:05:41,550 --> 00:05:43,509 I will hook you up with my employee discount, 69 00:05:43,510 --> 00:05:44,720 no questions asked. 70 00:05:45,220 --> 00:05:46,555 - Okay? - Okay. 71 00:05:51,310 --> 00:05:54,020 Thanks. Ten more ccs of tramadol. 72 00:05:54,021 --> 00:05:55,771 Any idea what I'm looking at here? 73 00:05:55,772 --> 00:05:57,481 He said his vision was blurry, 74 00:05:57,482 --> 00:06:00,694 - so, you know, that could suggest-- - Optic neuritis. 75 00:06:01,486 --> 00:06:02,862 Already ruled that out. 76 00:06:02,863 --> 00:06:04,447 - Cut. - That's a cut! 77 00:06:04,448 --> 00:06:06,741 Hey, buddy, not sure what that accent is. 78 00:06:06,742 --> 00:06:08,993 Just do it normally, okay? 79 00:06:08,994 --> 00:06:10,286 We're gonna go again right away. 80 00:06:10,287 --> 00:06:11,204 Set. 81 00:06:11,205 --> 00:06:16,000 He said his vision was blurry, which could suggest-- 82 00:06:16,001 --> 00:06:19,045 Cut! Say the line faster. Okay? Faster this time. 83 00:06:19,046 --> 00:06:21,339 He said his vision was blurry, which could suggest-- 84 00:06:21,340 --> 00:06:23,841 Cut! Jesus, I think we gotta fire this guy. 85 00:06:23,842 --> 00:06:25,469 Can we get somebody else in here? 86 00:07:10,305 --> 00:07:14,267 Griff, it's Doug. I just ran into your mom at the supermarket. 87 00:07:14,268 --> 00:07:16,144 She said you booked a big gig today. 88 00:07:16,854 --> 00:07:17,812 I'm proud of you, bud. 89 00:07:17,813 --> 00:07:20,147 Everyone in Buffalo misses you. 90 00:07:20,148 --> 00:07:22,651 I love you. Come visit, man! 91 00:07:24,653 --> 00:07:25,987 Jesus, Jerry. 92 00:07:25,988 --> 00:07:29,575 Doug, what is this thing about-- there's some kind of sewer monster? 93 00:07:30,367 --> 00:07:31,451 Oh, boy. 94 00:07:33,453 --> 00:07:34,454 Doug. 95 00:07:35,581 --> 00:07:39,585 Look, I get that this is not what you dreamed about when you were a kid. 96 00:07:40,127 --> 00:07:42,336 But dreams, they go. Huh? 97 00:07:42,337 --> 00:07:44,338 Now, I'll be retiring soon. 98 00:07:44,339 --> 00:07:48,426 And, Doug, it is only a matter of time before all this is yours. 99 00:07:48,427 --> 00:07:49,510 - Really? - Yeah. 100 00:07:49,511 --> 00:07:51,805 Look around. Take it all in. 101 00:07:52,890 --> 00:07:54,183 And imagine. 102 00:07:55,934 --> 00:07:59,020 If you do it right, it's a pretty sweet setup we got here. 103 00:07:59,021 --> 00:08:02,649 This is a B, and maybe even a B+ life we're talking about. 104 00:08:05,777 --> 00:08:08,947 Are you sure you don't wanna do anything for your birthday? 105 00:08:09,448 --> 00:08:11,742 You used to make me celebrate your half-birthdays. 106 00:08:13,160 --> 00:08:14,745 Let's go get a beer. 107 00:08:15,370 --> 00:08:16,663 Or something. 108 00:08:18,040 --> 00:08:20,500 Maybe we just watch that new mountain climbing doc. 109 00:08:20,501 --> 00:08:23,462 About the lady that falls to her own death? 110 00:08:23,962 --> 00:08:25,171 Yeah. 111 00:08:25,172 --> 00:08:29,842 Fine, we can do the one about the free diver in the Maldives. 112 00:08:29,843 --> 00:08:32,512 Who drowns? Jesus Christ, Doug. 113 00:08:32,513 --> 00:08:34,805 I don't know. Let's just take a gummy and go to bed early. 114 00:08:34,806 --> 00:08:36,517 Surprise! 115 00:08:38,227 --> 00:08:40,228 Oh, my God, Malie. No! 116 00:08:40,229 --> 00:08:43,064 Oh, yes. Yes, you love a good, big birthday party. 117 00:08:43,065 --> 00:08:44,732 Dad, should've seen your face. 118 00:08:44,733 --> 00:08:46,651 - You knew about this? - It was my idea. 119 00:08:46,652 --> 00:08:48,653 - Buddy, take my coat, please. Thank you. - Okay. 120 00:08:48,654 --> 00:08:50,029 Hey! How are you? 121 00:08:50,030 --> 00:08:53,032 - Yeah. Happy birthday! - Jesus, Kenny. My back! 122 00:08:53,033 --> 00:08:55,451 - I'm sorry. - No! That's not... 123 00:08:55,452 --> 00:08:57,912 The actual lotion. The actual basket. 124 00:08:57,913 --> 00:08:59,705 "It puts the lotion in the basket"? 125 00:08:59,706 --> 00:09:01,666 - eBay, buddy. - Dude, that is sick. 126 00:09:01,667 --> 00:09:03,627 Yeah, no, that is actually sick. 127 00:09:04,920 --> 00:09:08,422 - Happy birthday, Dougie. - Thanks for making the trek, Claire. 128 00:09:08,423 --> 00:09:13,594 You know I love Buffalo this time of year. The slush, the hypothermia. 129 00:09:13,595 --> 00:09:14,887 What's up? No Trent? 130 00:09:14,888 --> 00:09:16,222 No Trent. 131 00:09:16,223 --> 00:09:17,890 Ever again, in fact. 132 00:09:17,891 --> 00:09:20,142 He started banging his dental hygienist. 133 00:09:20,143 --> 00:09:23,062 Anyway, tonight is all about you, baby. 134 00:09:23,063 --> 00:09:24,731 - It's about me. - It's about you. 135 00:09:27,901 --> 00:09:30,486 You came! Here you are. Oh, my God. 136 00:09:30,487 --> 00:09:31,571 It's been too long, pal. 137 00:09:31,572 --> 00:09:34,031 It's so good to see you. It has been way too long. 138 00:09:34,032 --> 00:09:35,116 Happy birthday. 139 00:09:35,117 --> 00:09:36,826 Thank you for coming out here. 140 00:09:36,827 --> 00:09:38,327 Think I'm gonna miss this? Never. 141 00:09:38,328 --> 00:09:40,037 We got a lot of catching up to do. 142 00:09:40,038 --> 00:09:45,835 Many years ago, a group of young, passionate artists had a vision. 143 00:09:45,836 --> 00:09:51,549 It was a vision that's not particularly original or even good, 144 00:09:51,550 --> 00:09:53,593 but it was theirs. 145 00:09:53,594 --> 00:09:57,013 And so they made that vision a reality. 146 00:09:57,014 --> 00:09:59,640 And, without further ado, 147 00:09:59,641 --> 00:10:04,770 I present to you a completely unrestored print 148 00:10:04,771 --> 00:10:09,860 of 13-year-old Doug McCallister's masterpiece, The Quatch. 149 00:10:10,736 --> 00:10:12,945 What? I thought we lost all the copies of that! 150 00:10:12,946 --> 00:10:14,030 - No way. - Nope. 151 00:10:14,031 --> 00:10:16,908 I found it in my mom's garage. It was stuck in the player. 152 00:10:16,909 --> 00:10:19,327 Are we sure this is okay for the kids to watch? 153 00:10:19,328 --> 00:10:20,620 Who gives a shit? 154 00:10:20,621 --> 00:10:23,748 Mrs. Brown had us bleep all the swears so we could show it at the school assembly. 155 00:10:23,749 --> 00:10:25,041 Yeah, which didn't make much sense 156 00:10:25,042 --> 00:10:27,668 because we were very clear about it being R-rated. 157 00:10:27,669 --> 00:10:30,254 - Happy birthday, pal. - This isn't happening. 158 00:10:30,255 --> 00:10:32,174 It's happening. Here we go. 159 00:10:33,800 --> 00:10:34,967 - God. - Here, sit. 160 00:10:34,968 --> 00:10:36,637 I'm gonna kill you. 161 00:10:40,057 --> 00:10:41,433 I haven't changed a bit. 162 00:10:42,976 --> 00:10:44,561 Holy ****! 163 00:10:45,312 --> 00:10:47,897 - Look at the grass! - Hot on the trail! 164 00:10:47,898 --> 00:10:50,358 - Look out for the quatch. - Here we go. 165 00:10:50,359 --> 00:10:53,945 Before you **** strike me, I need to **** ask you one **** thing. 166 00:10:53,946 --> 00:10:55,655 You got some **** bite left? 167 00:10:55,656 --> 00:10:56,614 Or you all **** bark? 168 00:10:56,615 --> 00:10:57,865 Boom! 169 00:10:57,866 --> 00:11:00,535 Damn, we'd been watching a lot of Scorsese. 170 00:11:00,536 --> 00:11:02,662 We didn't quite have the ear for it, did we? 171 00:11:02,663 --> 00:11:05,540 - I need to tell you something. - What is it? 172 00:11:05,541 --> 00:11:08,626 That I love you. I've always loved you. 173 00:11:08,627 --> 00:11:10,378 And I always **** will. 174 00:11:10,379 --> 00:11:11,879 I **** love you too. 175 00:11:11,880 --> 00:11:13,799 Now, kiss me, woman. 176 00:11:15,342 --> 00:11:18,052 So much charisma. Already, you had it. 177 00:11:18,053 --> 00:11:20,638 I still can't believe I let Doug talk me into doing that. 178 00:11:20,639 --> 00:11:22,391 What are you talking about? That was your idea. 179 00:11:24,893 --> 00:11:25,936 Yeah! 180 00:11:26,562 --> 00:11:28,771 - It's coming for us. - We're trapped. 181 00:11:28,772 --> 00:11:30,399 What the hell are we gonna do? 182 00:11:31,650 --> 00:11:32,484 - No! - Yes. 183 00:11:33,026 --> 00:11:35,487 Oh, my God. We're all gonna die! 184 00:11:39,449 --> 00:11:41,158 This is where it gets real. 185 00:11:41,159 --> 00:11:43,453 Not on my watch, mister. 186 00:11:45,455 --> 00:11:47,248 - Boom! - Yeah! 187 00:11:47,249 --> 00:11:49,125 - Yeah! - Yeah! 188 00:11:49,126 --> 00:11:50,502 Amazing! 189 00:11:51,753 --> 00:11:53,130 So good! 190 00:11:58,468 --> 00:12:01,470 That's probably the best birthday gift I've ever received. 191 00:12:01,471 --> 00:12:03,890 - I didn't even know it existed. - Well, I'm giving it to you. 192 00:12:03,891 --> 00:12:05,893 Plus the TV 'cause you can't get it out. 193 00:12:06,894 --> 00:12:08,103 - Yay! - Yes! 194 00:12:11,815 --> 00:12:15,193 - It was right after, you know... - Right after senior year of college. 195 00:12:15,194 --> 00:12:18,571 Yes, that's when Anaconda came out. Remember? We saw it like 30 times. 196 00:12:18,572 --> 00:12:20,531 Put it right there alongside the classics. 197 00:12:20,532 --> 00:12:22,491 Totally. How about that cast? Come on. 198 00:12:22,492 --> 00:12:26,078 - J.Lo, Ice Cube, Owen Wilson, Stoltz. - Oh, for sure. 199 00:12:26,079 --> 00:12:27,371 I mean, it's a murderers' row. 200 00:12:27,372 --> 00:12:32,127 Plus, that snake was like a metaphor for our lives at that moment. 201 00:12:34,004 --> 00:12:36,589 Like, how life is coming at you, you know, 202 00:12:36,590 --> 00:12:39,550 hunting you and forcing you, like, 203 00:12:39,551 --> 00:12:40,719 off your... 204 00:12:41,595 --> 00:12:43,805 like your parents' health insurance and stuff. 205 00:12:46,892 --> 00:12:48,684 - I don't know... - No, that's true. 206 00:12:48,685 --> 00:12:50,102 - Yeah, that's... - It was like that. 207 00:12:50,103 --> 00:12:51,562 - That's right, Kenny. - Whatever. 208 00:12:51,563 --> 00:12:55,525 How about that accent by Jon Voight? How about that? That was a choice. 209 00:12:55,526 --> 00:12:58,569 "They wrap around you until you get the privilege 210 00:12:58,570 --> 00:13:00,655 - of hearing your bones break... - Bones break... 211 00:13:00,656 --> 00:13:06,495 ...before the power of embrace causes your veins to explode." 212 00:13:07,162 --> 00:13:08,163 Sorry. 213 00:13:10,791 --> 00:13:12,709 I have the rights to Anaconda. 214 00:13:14,711 --> 00:13:15,754 What? 215 00:13:16,171 --> 00:13:17,840 I have the rights to Anaconda. 216 00:13:19,341 --> 00:13:20,675 Yeah. 217 00:13:20,676 --> 00:13:25,513 Apparently, the movie was based on a novel by some dead Japanese guy. 218 00:13:25,514 --> 00:13:29,350 And my agent introduced me to his widow. 219 00:13:29,351 --> 00:13:34,564 Unbelievably, she was such a fan of the four episodes that I did on S.W.A.T... 220 00:13:34,565 --> 00:13:36,774 - Who isn't? - ...that she gave me the rights. 221 00:13:36,775 --> 00:13:39,528 Dude. So what are you gonna do with them? 222 00:13:40,237 --> 00:13:41,488 Well, not me. 223 00:13:42,823 --> 00:13:43,991 Us. 224 00:13:44,908 --> 00:13:48,160 We're gonna reboot the thing. Indie-style. 225 00:13:48,161 --> 00:13:52,582 Three weeks, run-and-gun in the Amazon. Skeletal crew. 226 00:13:52,583 --> 00:13:55,793 Claire, you and I can star. Kenny, you shoot it. Doug, you direct. 227 00:13:55,794 --> 00:13:58,379 Huh? Come on. What do you say? 228 00:13:58,380 --> 00:14:00,798 I mean, it's a wonderful idea in theory, but... 229 00:14:00,799 --> 00:14:04,135 I'm in! I can get time off from work. 230 00:14:04,136 --> 00:14:05,845 Yes, you can, Kenny. Sweet! 231 00:14:05,846 --> 00:14:09,515 Kenny, what are you talking about? You're in? He's not... No. He's not in. 232 00:14:09,516 --> 00:14:12,935 He says one thing and you're in already. You're going to the Amazon. 233 00:14:12,936 --> 00:14:15,563 - He's not in. - What do you say, Claire? 234 00:14:15,564 --> 00:14:17,190 - I just... - Come on. 235 00:14:17,191 --> 00:14:19,066 I don't know if I'm in the right headspace... 236 00:14:19,067 --> 00:14:20,318 - Of course you are. - ...with the divorce. 237 00:14:20,319 --> 00:14:22,236 Of course you're not in the right headspace. 238 00:14:22,237 --> 00:14:24,280 That's the best headspace. Are you kidding me? 239 00:14:24,281 --> 00:14:27,617 Come on, it's like Eat Pray Love and... shit. 240 00:14:27,618 --> 00:14:28,619 Come on. 241 00:14:29,411 --> 00:14:31,454 You know what? I'm in. 242 00:14:31,455 --> 00:14:33,956 - What? Really? - Yes! Sweet. 243 00:14:33,957 --> 00:14:36,375 Yeah. I mean, my life is totally shit anyway so... 244 00:14:36,376 --> 00:14:38,336 God, I'm so happy to hear that. 245 00:14:38,337 --> 00:14:41,005 I mean, not that your life is shit, but that you're in. 246 00:14:41,006 --> 00:14:43,049 Besides, as soon as Doug says yes, 247 00:14:43,050 --> 00:14:45,009 we'll probably need you to finance this whole thing. 248 00:14:45,010 --> 00:14:46,511 - What? - Thank you. 249 00:14:46,512 --> 00:14:47,554 Doug? 250 00:14:51,808 --> 00:14:53,894 Griff, I'm sorry. 251 00:14:54,478 --> 00:14:58,314 I got responsibilities. I got Malie, Charlie, my job. 252 00:14:58,315 --> 00:15:00,983 I know. Making wedding videos. 253 00:15:00,984 --> 00:15:02,402 Films. Right. 254 00:15:03,028 --> 00:15:04,696 It's a good life, you know? 255 00:15:05,239 --> 00:15:07,074 It's a B, B+ life. 256 00:15:08,200 --> 00:15:09,743 B, B+ life? 257 00:15:11,245 --> 00:15:12,454 It's a good life. 258 00:15:14,081 --> 00:15:15,540 Do you remember when we were kids 259 00:15:15,541 --> 00:15:17,208 and we would stay up till 4:00 in the morning, 260 00:15:17,209 --> 00:15:19,795 hanging out in your mom's basement watching horror movies? 261 00:15:20,504 --> 00:15:22,255 Scaring the shit out of ourselves. 262 00:15:22,256 --> 00:15:24,507 Texas Chainsaw on, like, repeat. 263 00:15:24,508 --> 00:15:27,010 Now we have the chance to make one ourselves. 264 00:15:27,845 --> 00:15:30,722 Dude, it's what we dreamed about ever since we were little kids. 265 00:15:32,474 --> 00:15:33,642 I hear ya. 266 00:15:34,643 --> 00:15:36,895 But we're not kids anymore, Griff. 267 00:15:37,479 --> 00:15:38,814 I'm sorry. 268 00:15:41,108 --> 00:15:42,818 Yeah. I know. All right. 269 00:15:43,819 --> 00:15:44,862 I just... 270 00:15:45,779 --> 00:15:46,947 I get it. I do. 271 00:15:47,865 --> 00:15:49,032 I get it. 272 00:15:54,580 --> 00:15:56,874 Still watching The Quatch. 273 00:16:02,462 --> 00:16:04,590 Charlie, why don't you go check on those cookies? 274 00:16:05,174 --> 00:16:07,718 Okay, but I'm pausing it, so... 275 00:16:08,302 --> 00:16:09,303 don't touch it. 276 00:16:10,387 --> 00:16:12,555 Gonna need some ice-cold milch with that. 277 00:16:12,556 --> 00:16:13,807 You got it. 278 00:16:15,017 --> 00:16:16,601 - What are you doing? - What? 279 00:16:16,602 --> 00:16:18,019 Just go make the movie. 280 00:16:18,020 --> 00:16:19,395 Malie. 281 00:16:19,396 --> 00:16:22,023 Come on. Every time you watch this thing, you light up. 282 00:16:22,024 --> 00:16:25,193 Like I haven't seen you light up in a long time. 283 00:16:25,194 --> 00:16:28,696 So what? I'm supposed to chase some Hollywood fantasy I had as a kid? 284 00:16:28,697 --> 00:16:30,990 Waste a bunch of money and time, and for what? 285 00:16:30,991 --> 00:16:33,202 In the end, what's it gonna change? 286 00:16:35,787 --> 00:16:36,788 Okay. 287 00:16:38,165 --> 00:16:39,166 Okay. 288 00:16:39,708 --> 00:16:40,709 Okay. 289 00:16:48,342 --> 00:16:50,551 We hope you come to celebrate... 290 00:16:50,552 --> 00:16:51,594 As we become... 291 00:16:51,595 --> 00:16:52,971 The Hansons. 292 00:16:54,556 --> 00:16:56,433 Holy shit. 293 00:17:08,319 --> 00:17:10,489 ...what will it be? 294 00:17:11,740 --> 00:17:16,411 I don't want to wait For our lives to be over 295 00:17:16,912 --> 00:17:18,829 What am I singing? 296 00:17:20,915 --> 00:17:21,916 Hey, dude. 297 00:17:24,086 --> 00:17:25,378 I don't want to wait, man. 298 00:17:27,631 --> 00:17:30,634 Our lives could be, like... over. 299 00:17:31,260 --> 00:17:32,635 What are you talking about? 300 00:17:32,636 --> 00:17:36,139 The Anaconda thing. You were serious, right? 301 00:17:37,140 --> 00:17:38,266 Yes, very. 302 00:17:38,267 --> 00:17:39,685 Then let's do it. 303 00:17:40,686 --> 00:17:42,729 Let's reboot Anaconda. 304 00:17:43,397 --> 00:17:45,440 Yes! Yes. 305 00:18:06,753 --> 00:18:10,047 All right, budget-wise, soup to nuts, what does it cost to get this thing made? 306 00:18:10,048 --> 00:18:13,885 I figure we need three weeks of shooting. Some VFX, some SFX, 307 00:18:13,886 --> 00:18:17,180 a riverboat, a riverboat captain, travel to and from a jungle, 308 00:18:17,181 --> 00:18:20,933 and a gigantic real snake, preferably a rental. 309 00:18:20,934 --> 00:18:22,518 - Rental, copy. - All in, 310 00:18:22,519 --> 00:18:24,479 two, two-and-a-half million dollars. 311 00:18:25,105 --> 00:18:26,230 That sounds right. 312 00:18:26,231 --> 00:18:30,610 We've approved a loan for you for up to... 313 00:18:30,611 --> 00:18:32,486 $9,400. 314 00:18:32,487 --> 00:18:33,821 Yes! 315 00:18:33,822 --> 00:18:36,616 I've revised the budget down to... 316 00:18:36,617 --> 00:18:38,034 $43,000 all in. 317 00:18:38,035 --> 00:18:39,410 That sounds more right. 318 00:18:39,411 --> 00:18:41,370 Now, the film does have to be scary, right? 319 00:18:41,371 --> 00:18:45,291 Terrifying. But it can't just be about a giant snake killing people. 320 00:18:45,292 --> 00:18:46,626 - Exactly. - You know? 321 00:18:46,627 --> 00:18:48,753 It has to be about something, right? 322 00:18:48,754 --> 00:18:49,755 Right. 323 00:18:50,631 --> 00:18:52,131 I mean... 324 00:18:52,132 --> 00:18:53,175 - Themes. - Themes. 325 00:18:54,134 --> 00:18:55,259 Come on. 326 00:18:55,260 --> 00:18:57,053 - Like grief. - What about revenge? 327 00:18:57,054 --> 00:18:59,722 In terms of themes, that's like one of the top ones. 328 00:18:59,723 --> 00:19:01,682 - Oh, my God. I got a good one. - Hit me. 329 00:19:01,683 --> 00:19:03,560 Intergenerational trauma. 330 00:19:04,102 --> 00:19:05,770 I love intergenerational trauma. 331 00:19:05,771 --> 00:19:07,480 Who doesn't love intergenerational trauma? 332 00:19:07,481 --> 00:19:09,691 - It's the best. - We're onto something here. 333 00:19:17,824 --> 00:19:19,325 This is a masterpiece. 334 00:19:19,326 --> 00:19:21,577 You're a goddamn genius. I love it. 335 00:19:21,578 --> 00:19:23,079 - Don't change a word. - Not a word. 336 00:19:23,080 --> 00:19:25,456 Dude, you killed it. It's scary, emotional, funny when it needs to be. 337 00:19:25,457 --> 00:19:27,917 - Romantic. - Dude, thank you. 338 00:19:27,918 --> 00:19:29,169 Hey, Doug... 339 00:19:30,838 --> 00:19:34,174 I know that we had our little dustup, but... 340 00:19:35,843 --> 00:19:37,677 I need to shoot this film, man. 341 00:19:37,678 --> 00:19:38,804 Dustup? 342 00:19:39,429 --> 00:19:42,932 Yeah. He fired me from the wedding video stuff 343 00:19:42,933 --> 00:19:45,601 'cause I got a little wasted. 344 00:19:45,602 --> 00:19:47,062 He knocked over the wedding cake. 345 00:19:48,063 --> 00:19:50,982 - But I'm dealing with it. - Like, getting sober? 346 00:19:50,983 --> 00:19:52,066 Yes. 347 00:19:52,067 --> 00:19:54,485 Well, I mean, Buffalo sober. 348 00:19:54,486 --> 00:19:55,486 Buffalo sober? 349 00:19:55,487 --> 00:19:56,822 Just beer and wine. 350 00:19:58,115 --> 00:20:01,785 And then some of the lighter liquors. But definitely not all of 'em. 351 00:20:03,203 --> 00:20:04,162 I'm proud of you. 352 00:20:05,497 --> 00:20:06,707 Doug? 353 00:20:08,834 --> 00:20:11,669 If I'm being honest, I enabled you a little bit. 354 00:20:11,670 --> 00:20:14,131 Of course you get a second chance. Let's do this. 355 00:20:15,048 --> 00:20:16,091 - Nice! - Thank you, man. 356 00:20:17,342 --> 00:20:18,801 Car's here. 357 00:20:18,802 --> 00:20:22,471 And you have the mefloquine, right? You only take that once a week. 358 00:20:22,472 --> 00:20:25,266 Hey, Dad. I almost forgot. 359 00:20:25,267 --> 00:20:29,312 - Talk to me. - But I got you this. 360 00:20:29,313 --> 00:20:30,813 What? 361 00:20:30,814 --> 00:20:32,107 I know. Pretty sick. 362 00:20:32,691 --> 00:20:35,610 "World's greatest Doug." 363 00:20:35,611 --> 00:20:38,279 - I thought it should say, "Dad." - Whatever, man, it's funny. 364 00:20:38,280 --> 00:20:40,490 I love it. It's much better. 365 00:21:17,945 --> 00:21:20,238 - So it begins. - Yeah! 366 00:21:20,239 --> 00:21:22,241 - Oh, yeah. - All right. Made it. 367 00:21:23,408 --> 00:21:25,993 - We're here. - That's what I'm talkin' about! 368 00:21:25,994 --> 00:21:27,496 Brasília! 369 00:21:28,205 --> 00:21:30,873 So, hey, I was reading about anacondas on the plane. 370 00:21:30,874 --> 00:21:33,835 Basically, they wait in the water for days, 371 00:21:33,836 --> 00:21:36,921 stalking their prey, never moving, just waiting, 372 00:21:36,922 --> 00:21:38,340 and then when a prey comes... 373 00:21:38,966 --> 00:21:40,049 snatch and grab. 374 00:21:40,050 --> 00:21:42,844 Thousand pounds of pressure. Think you're gonna get away? You're not. 375 00:21:42,845 --> 00:21:45,681 Crushing you. Oxygen leaving your lungs. 376 00:21:47,391 --> 00:21:48,975 Oh, God, it's terrible. 377 00:21:48,976 --> 00:21:51,644 - So, like in the movie Anaconda. - Yeah, exactly. 378 00:21:51,645 --> 00:21:52,728 So it's real? 379 00:21:52,729 --> 00:21:53,897 Yeah, it's all real. 380 00:21:55,816 --> 00:21:57,651 Very real. 381 00:21:59,069 --> 00:22:01,738 There's this story about this woman... 382 00:22:02,364 --> 00:22:03,365 God bless her. 383 00:22:04,032 --> 00:22:06,577 The snake wraps around her so tight... 384 00:22:08,579 --> 00:22:10,205 the eyeballs just... 385 00:22:11,832 --> 00:22:13,791 - No. - No way. 386 00:22:13,792 --> 00:22:15,877 Yeah, it was my grandmother, Sylvana. 387 00:22:15,878 --> 00:22:17,003 Shit. 388 00:22:17,004 --> 00:22:20,299 Horrible grandmother. But still sad. 389 00:22:21,592 --> 00:22:22,759 I'm sorry, who are you? 390 00:22:23,427 --> 00:22:26,512 I'm sorry. Carlos Santiago. Yeah, you can call me Santiago. 391 00:22:26,513 --> 00:22:28,598 - Hey! It's Kenny. - Yeah, hey. 392 00:22:28,599 --> 00:22:31,225 - Kenny from the phone. Hey. - Kenny. Kenny, hey. 393 00:22:31,226 --> 00:22:33,353 - Hi. - Yeah, this is our snake handler. 394 00:22:34,396 --> 00:22:36,230 - Thank God. - He's supposed to be the best. 395 00:22:36,231 --> 00:22:38,399 No. "Supposed to be"? We have a joker here. 396 00:22:38,400 --> 00:22:41,068 No. I am the best. Yes. 397 00:22:41,069 --> 00:22:42,153 - That's good. - Yeah. 398 00:22:42,154 --> 00:22:44,239 So, welcome to Brazil. 399 00:22:45,365 --> 00:22:46,742 Let's meet the snake. 400 00:22:59,171 --> 00:23:01,632 Go around, we'll find her. 401 00:23:20,275 --> 00:23:23,153 When I found him, he was dying of starvation. 402 00:23:23,946 --> 00:23:28,324 His food supply destroyed by gold miners who put mercury in the river. 403 00:23:28,325 --> 00:23:31,161 - Gold miners? - Gold mining poisons our land. 404 00:23:31,954 --> 00:23:35,414 Their greed almost killed my snake. 405 00:23:35,415 --> 00:23:39,210 But I fed him, I nursed him back to life, 406 00:23:39,211 --> 00:23:42,839 and in many ways, he did the same for me. 407 00:23:42,840 --> 00:23:45,550 Yes. A tale as old as time. 408 00:23:45,551 --> 00:23:46,802 Saved by a snake. 409 00:23:49,805 --> 00:23:51,222 What's your name? 410 00:23:51,223 --> 00:23:52,306 What's... Griff. 411 00:23:52,307 --> 00:23:54,476 Okay, Griff. He's not only a snake. 412 00:23:55,185 --> 00:23:57,354 He's my tiny giant, my friend. 413 00:23:58,272 --> 00:24:02,067 One of the most important creatures of the herpetological world. 414 00:24:02,651 --> 00:24:04,318 No, of course... I... Sure. 415 00:24:04,319 --> 00:24:07,154 I didn't... I wasn't trying to... Yes. 416 00:24:07,155 --> 00:24:10,242 Okay. Let me introduce you. 417 00:24:13,745 --> 00:24:15,079 Heitor. 418 00:24:15,080 --> 00:24:17,957 - Heitor? - Oh, my goodness. 419 00:24:17,958 --> 00:24:19,625 Hey, cutie. 420 00:24:19,626 --> 00:24:21,628 - Oh, no. Not cutie. - Oh, my... 421 00:24:23,630 --> 00:24:26,424 Oh, hell yes! This thing is nuts! 422 00:24:26,425 --> 00:24:29,969 There are rumors of 'condas even bigger. 423 00:24:29,970 --> 00:24:32,514 Maybe four or five times this size. 424 00:24:33,932 --> 00:24:35,349 Go ahead, Kenny from the phone. 425 00:24:35,350 --> 00:24:38,645 Is it true that they regurgitate their prey? 426 00:24:39,188 --> 00:24:40,438 Sometimes. 427 00:24:40,439 --> 00:24:42,398 I mean, if you're lucky, 428 00:24:42,399 --> 00:24:45,402 you'd die right away because of suffocation. 429 00:24:46,028 --> 00:24:50,114 But only the unlucky ones survive. 430 00:24:50,115 --> 00:24:51,325 Unlucky? 431 00:24:52,993 --> 00:24:57,455 Yeah, because then you might actually be conscious 432 00:24:57,456 --> 00:25:01,251 when the snake comes back to finish you off. 433 00:25:01,877 --> 00:25:04,755 Gotcha. Better to die. 434 00:25:14,014 --> 00:25:16,725 - Look at that boat! - This is money in the bank, baby. 435 00:25:42,459 --> 00:25:44,127 Hey. Let me ask you a question. 436 00:25:45,462 --> 00:25:46,755 Our snake guy... 437 00:25:47,256 --> 00:25:50,007 Does he seem kind of batshit crazy? 438 00:25:50,008 --> 00:25:52,552 I mean, he's best friends with a snake. 439 00:25:52,553 --> 00:25:54,011 - Of course he's a little quirky. - Yeah. 440 00:25:54,012 --> 00:25:55,096 But I like him. 441 00:25:55,097 --> 00:25:56,013 - Really? - Yeah. 442 00:25:56,014 --> 00:25:57,098 But then again, 443 00:25:57,099 --> 00:25:59,225 I used up all my vacation days 444 00:25:59,226 --> 00:26:02,520 to come make a self-financed snake movie with you three, so... 445 00:26:02,521 --> 00:26:04,730 - Yeah, your judgment is really off. - My judgment is off. 446 00:26:04,731 --> 00:26:05,857 - It always has been. - Exactly. 447 00:26:05,858 --> 00:26:07,900 Anybody talk to the captain? It's time to shoot. 448 00:26:07,901 --> 00:26:09,987 I'll reach out again, boss. 449 00:26:10,988 --> 00:26:13,155 Hi, guys. My name is Ana. 450 00:26:13,156 --> 00:26:14,992 I believe you spoke to my father on the phone? 451 00:26:15,576 --> 00:26:17,160 Bruno? That's your dad? 452 00:26:17,870 --> 00:26:20,080 Yeah, he sends his apologies, but he's at the hospital. 453 00:26:21,415 --> 00:26:22,790 - I'm sorry. - Unfortunately, 454 00:26:22,791 --> 00:26:24,709 you'll have to make other accommodations, 455 00:26:24,710 --> 00:26:27,920 'cause I need to take this boat upriver for a routine service. 456 00:26:27,921 --> 00:26:29,463 But I can assure you a full refund. 457 00:26:29,464 --> 00:26:30,506 No, wait. Wait. 458 00:26:30,507 --> 00:26:32,508 - Everything else is booked. - Yeah. 459 00:26:32,509 --> 00:26:34,385 And we're gonna shoot a movie. 460 00:26:34,386 --> 00:26:36,095 It's a reboot of Anaconda. 461 00:26:36,096 --> 00:26:38,097 Technically, it's more of a reimagining, but-- 462 00:26:38,098 --> 00:26:40,057 It's actually more of a spiritual sequel. 463 00:26:40,058 --> 00:26:41,225 Good for you. 464 00:26:41,226 --> 00:26:43,269 - There's gotta be a way, right? - We can crew the boat. 465 00:26:43,270 --> 00:26:44,353 There's nothing I can do... 466 00:26:44,354 --> 00:26:47,815 We have dreamed of making this film together our entire lives. 467 00:26:47,816 --> 00:26:50,276 Please. I am begging you. 468 00:26:50,277 --> 00:26:52,320 - Please. - Help us find another way. 469 00:26:52,321 --> 00:26:54,113 - Let's do this, but fast. - Okay. 470 00:26:54,114 --> 00:26:55,532 - Yes! Let's go! - Thank you! 471 00:27:18,680 --> 00:27:19,764 Wow! 472 00:27:19,765 --> 00:27:20,848 Yes! 473 00:27:20,849 --> 00:27:22,850 This is so beautiful. 474 00:27:22,851 --> 00:27:24,770 This is amazing. It's amazing. 475 00:27:26,813 --> 00:27:27,939 Looks exactly... 476 00:27:27,940 --> 00:27:28,941 Look! 477 00:27:30,651 --> 00:27:32,026 - Kenny? - Yeah, bud? 478 00:27:32,027 --> 00:27:34,111 - How did you find this boat? - Cocktail, anyone? 479 00:27:34,112 --> 00:27:35,113 Nice! 480 00:27:36,073 --> 00:27:37,074 It's a computer. 481 00:27:39,409 --> 00:27:40,577 Yes! 482 00:27:43,747 --> 00:27:48,001 I want a list of all the boats that left the marina in the last 3 hours. 483 00:27:49,044 --> 00:27:50,128 Now! 484 00:28:00,097 --> 00:28:02,473 One more thing, you guys, before we go to bed. 485 00:28:02,474 --> 00:28:04,267 We got a big day tomorrow. 486 00:28:04,268 --> 00:28:08,396 If you remember, we had a tradition on all our films. 487 00:28:08,397 --> 00:28:10,273 The night before we started shooting, 488 00:28:10,274 --> 00:28:12,900 we would say a prayer to the movie gods, 489 00:28:12,901 --> 00:28:16,112 asking them to basically not screw us over, 490 00:28:16,113 --> 00:28:19,407 and for the first time ever, may they listen. 491 00:28:19,408 --> 00:28:20,993 - Come on, to the movie gods. - Yes. 492 00:28:37,176 --> 00:28:38,467 All right. We're rolling. 493 00:28:38,468 --> 00:28:41,345 Anaconda, scene 15, take one. Slap it. 494 00:28:41,346 --> 00:28:42,848 Bella! 495 00:28:44,016 --> 00:28:47,185 - What the hell are you still doing here? - I've come to take you home. 496 00:28:47,186 --> 00:28:50,147 It's time you stopped chasing this mythical snake. 497 00:28:50,898 --> 00:28:53,192 And what if I'm not prone to giving up? 498 00:28:53,692 --> 00:28:54,943 I didn't see you filming there. 499 00:28:55,485 --> 00:28:56,903 What are we doing? EPK? 500 00:28:56,904 --> 00:28:58,988 Background, DVD, bonus stuff. 501 00:28:58,989 --> 00:29:02,825 The Anaconda is a story of an intrepid biologist played by Claire, 502 00:29:02,826 --> 00:29:08,456 who hires an unhinged snake tracker played by Griff, 503 00:29:08,457 --> 00:29:11,250 to hunt down and kill a giant, mythical 'conda 504 00:29:11,251 --> 00:29:12,585 that ate her entire family. 505 00:29:12,586 --> 00:29:15,546 Come and get me, you goddamn snake! 506 00:29:15,547 --> 00:29:17,798 And on a deeper level, it's about chasing your dreams. 507 00:29:17,799 --> 00:29:23,262 And camera set, push-ups good, and action! 508 00:29:23,263 --> 00:29:24,680 What's it like shooting with Doug again? 509 00:29:24,681 --> 00:29:26,265 He and I are best friends. 510 00:29:26,266 --> 00:29:27,683 We've worked together our whole lives. 511 00:29:27,684 --> 00:29:29,602 And I went out to LA, and he was gonna come out. 512 00:29:29,603 --> 00:29:32,355 We were gonna be a partnership, and he didn't do it. 513 00:29:32,356 --> 00:29:36,692 Griff and I planned to work together in LA, but, you know, life intervened. 514 00:29:36,693 --> 00:29:38,361 But it doesn't matter, 'cause now we're together 515 00:29:38,362 --> 00:29:41,489 and now we're back, we're making this, and it's as it should be. 516 00:29:41,490 --> 00:29:43,200 I am the insects. 517 00:29:44,243 --> 00:29:46,994 The anaconda moves slow and steady. 518 00:29:46,995 --> 00:29:48,162 Sometimes it goes fast. 519 00:29:48,163 --> 00:29:50,707 Snake POV, RD. Take 1. 520 00:29:51,416 --> 00:29:53,334 No. No, it's not working. 521 00:29:53,335 --> 00:29:55,921 Snake POV, the right way. Take 2. 522 00:29:56,755 --> 00:29:59,549 Sometimes he goes from above in the trees, 523 00:29:59,550 --> 00:30:01,676 sometimes from below in the water. 524 00:30:01,677 --> 00:30:05,888 The toothpick, it unlocked a couple of aspects of this character for me. 525 00:30:05,889 --> 00:30:07,015 There's something there. 526 00:30:10,727 --> 00:30:13,187 Why would I be nervous about doing a love story with Griff? 527 00:30:13,188 --> 00:30:14,356 You guys used to date. 528 00:30:14,898 --> 00:30:16,315 That was a long time ago. 529 00:30:16,316 --> 00:30:17,567 A little bit of chaos 530 00:30:17,568 --> 00:30:19,194 is part of the ingredients. 531 00:30:26,743 --> 00:30:27,994 Maybe look at each other. 532 00:30:27,995 --> 00:30:30,079 This might be the last time you look at each other. 533 00:30:30,080 --> 00:30:32,123 You'd think you'd be a little nicer to the guy 534 00:30:32,124 --> 00:30:34,000 who's out here to save your life. 535 00:30:34,001 --> 00:30:35,252 You're an asshole. 536 00:30:37,462 --> 00:30:38,463 Yeah. 537 00:30:39,298 --> 00:30:41,133 And a PhD. 538 00:30:44,511 --> 00:30:45,970 And cut. 539 00:30:45,971 --> 00:30:48,931 Great stuff, guys. We got it. 540 00:30:48,932 --> 00:30:51,851 Should we go one more time? You wanna try it again? 541 00:30:51,852 --> 00:30:53,519 No. I'm good if you're good. 542 00:30:53,520 --> 00:30:54,855 Let's go one more time. 543 00:31:02,821 --> 00:31:06,782 - The chemistry between you two is... - Yeah? 544 00:31:06,783 --> 00:31:08,368 Like we were right back in high school. 545 00:31:09,077 --> 00:31:10,494 When you looked up at her... 546 00:31:10,495 --> 00:31:11,829 Well, that's 'cause of your note. 547 00:31:11,830 --> 00:31:14,040 About taking the beat right before you did it? 548 00:31:14,041 --> 00:31:15,918 Yeah, yeah. It made the scene. 549 00:31:16,502 --> 00:31:17,669 I tell you... 550 00:31:18,837 --> 00:31:20,671 I never felt like this on S.W.A.T. 551 00:31:20,672 --> 00:31:22,965 I mean, granted I was only in a couple of episodes, 552 00:31:22,966 --> 00:31:25,009 but it was never collaborative. It was never fun. 553 00:31:25,010 --> 00:31:26,177 Not... 554 00:31:26,178 --> 00:31:27,845 Not like this. This... 555 00:31:27,846 --> 00:31:30,349 - This is-- - Like we were back on Quatch? 556 00:31:32,226 --> 00:31:33,227 Yeah. 557 00:31:34,770 --> 00:31:35,771 Yeah. 558 00:31:42,110 --> 00:31:43,779 Do you guys have chupacabra? 559 00:31:45,197 --> 00:31:46,865 That looks so good. 560 00:31:48,825 --> 00:31:51,452 Hey, so, one script thing. 561 00:31:51,453 --> 00:31:53,996 I was thinking, at the midway point, 562 00:31:53,997 --> 00:31:57,917 instead of talking the bad guy out of it, 563 00:31:57,918 --> 00:31:59,460 what if... 564 00:31:59,461 --> 00:32:01,213 Claire's character... 565 00:32:02,381 --> 00:32:03,714 headbutts him? 566 00:32:03,715 --> 00:32:05,717 Sorry. Headbutts him? 567 00:32:06,385 --> 00:32:07,510 Headbutts him. 568 00:32:07,511 --> 00:32:09,513 Or... Or... 569 00:32:10,806 --> 00:32:11,889 we both do. 570 00:32:11,890 --> 00:32:13,391 Double headbutt. 571 00:32:13,392 --> 00:32:15,643 - Come on. It's kinda revolutionary. - Double headbutt. 572 00:32:15,644 --> 00:32:17,144 That is super revolutionary. 573 00:32:17,145 --> 00:32:19,188 Why is that super revolutionary? 574 00:32:19,189 --> 00:32:21,357 Well, it's never been done. 575 00:32:21,358 --> 00:32:24,735 Jesus Christ. This is a beautiful scene with real stakes, Doug. 576 00:32:24,736 --> 00:32:26,279 Feel free to weigh in here. 577 00:32:26,280 --> 00:32:27,738 Nah, I hear you. I do. 578 00:32:27,739 --> 00:32:30,325 And, as always, I trust your instincts on this. 579 00:32:31,869 --> 00:32:34,453 But a double headbutt is pretty revolutionary. 580 00:32:34,454 --> 00:32:37,456 Right? It's very revolutionary. Yes. 581 00:32:37,457 --> 00:32:39,375 - There's no denying it. - None! 582 00:32:39,376 --> 00:32:42,503 Come on, Claire. Is the problem that you don't know how to headbutt? 583 00:32:42,504 --> 00:32:44,881 Why would I not know how to headbutt? 584 00:32:44,882 --> 00:32:47,133 We're not born with these skills. We learn them along the way. 585 00:32:47,134 --> 00:32:50,553 Let me show you. Tight core, breathe in, hold that breath. 586 00:32:50,554 --> 00:32:51,929 Yeah? 587 00:32:51,930 --> 00:32:53,390 And you can vocalize. 588 00:32:54,099 --> 00:32:58,645 Another kind of headbutt is more unleashed, just full-on... 589 00:33:00,230 --> 00:33:01,898 He got the arms in there. That's good. 590 00:33:01,899 --> 00:33:03,524 Send that shit into the goal. 591 00:33:03,525 --> 00:33:06,652 Or you put some Brazilian sauce on that. You know? 592 00:33:06,653 --> 00:33:08,280 And you go, boom! Toma! 593 00:33:08,822 --> 00:33:10,281 - Toma! - Toma? 594 00:33:10,282 --> 00:33:11,490 Hey, I love it. 595 00:33:11,491 --> 00:33:12,783 Yeah, that's right. 596 00:33:12,784 --> 00:33:15,036 - Brazilian spice. - Yeah! 597 00:33:15,037 --> 00:33:18,080 If I was gonna headbutt, I would go for the bridge of the nose. 598 00:33:18,081 --> 00:33:19,625 - Yes. - Just crack it. 599 00:33:20,292 --> 00:33:23,045 - Jesus! - Yes! That's it. 600 00:33:25,088 --> 00:33:27,508 - Jeez. Yeah, that's great. - And you go, "Toma! Toma!" 601 00:33:28,967 --> 00:33:30,802 I think it's a different... Toma! 602 00:33:31,470 --> 00:33:33,180 - Toma! - Yeah, toma! 603 00:33:34,806 --> 00:33:35,849 Goddamn! 604 00:34:27,359 --> 00:34:30,236 I'm sorry, but how could this happen, huh? 605 00:34:30,237 --> 00:34:32,113 Kenny, I thought you said this guy was a pro. 606 00:34:32,114 --> 00:34:35,616 That's what he said, but he hasn't provided us with a certificate. 607 00:34:35,617 --> 00:34:37,869 You fixed the crate, right? It's taken care of? 608 00:34:37,870 --> 00:34:41,540 My thing. My job. Under control. All good. 609 00:34:42,416 --> 00:34:46,587 My Heitor, he's a beautiful, intelligent, smart, sexy creature. 610 00:34:47,504 --> 00:34:49,672 He does exactly what I command. 611 00:34:50,465 --> 00:34:53,634 And I would never let anything happen 612 00:34:53,635 --> 00:34:58,389 to you or the crazy one, or her, or her, or this "actor" here. 613 00:34:58,390 --> 00:35:00,767 - What the... - So have a good night. 614 00:35:02,644 --> 00:35:07,774 May the sounds of the forest be the music of your dreams. 615 00:35:09,943 --> 00:35:11,736 Jesus... 616 00:35:11,737 --> 00:35:13,614 Man, he's a poet. 617 00:35:27,586 --> 00:35:29,922 Okay. Actors, on your marks. 618 00:35:30,714 --> 00:35:32,298 Santiago, is Heitor ready? 619 00:35:32,299 --> 00:35:34,050 Yes, Heitor is always ready. 620 00:35:34,051 --> 00:35:36,428 Heitor is ready, and action! 621 00:35:41,517 --> 00:35:42,518 Cut, please. 622 00:35:44,436 --> 00:35:46,979 - Cut? All right, cut. Yeah. - Yeah, I just-- Sorry. I need a little... 623 00:35:46,980 --> 00:35:48,439 Kenny, do you mind if I... 624 00:35:48,440 --> 00:35:50,651 Santiago, take five. Heitor, five. 625 00:35:51,443 --> 00:35:53,402 - Hey. Wow, that thing, it's really... - Hey. 626 00:35:53,403 --> 00:35:56,447 It's huge when you see it up close and personal like that. 627 00:35:56,448 --> 00:35:57,740 Majestic creature. 628 00:35:57,741 --> 00:35:59,825 But I just was wondering... 629 00:35:59,826 --> 00:36:04,580 I throw myself in front of the snake to kind of protect Claire's character, 630 00:36:04,581 --> 00:36:05,831 - right? - Correct. 631 00:36:05,832 --> 00:36:09,670 Is there any value in not doing that? 632 00:36:10,170 --> 00:36:11,462 What? No. 633 00:36:11,463 --> 00:36:14,465 - No, no, he sacrifices himself for her. - Yeah. Of course. 634 00:36:14,466 --> 00:36:16,884 - It caps his arc. It's so important. - Right. Right. 635 00:36:16,885 --> 00:36:20,096 - And also, dude, it's totally safe. - Yeah. 636 00:36:20,097 --> 00:36:22,932 - Santiago has Heitor under control. - Okay. 637 00:36:22,933 --> 00:36:26,102 - You've got nothing to worry about. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah... 638 00:36:26,103 --> 00:36:28,145 - We're good. You're good. - Yeah. Okay. 639 00:36:28,146 --> 00:36:29,939 - Okay. - All right, let's do this. 640 00:36:29,940 --> 00:36:31,316 All right, take it from the top. 641 00:36:33,068 --> 00:36:34,111 Back to one. 642 00:36:35,279 --> 00:36:38,407 Santiago, Heitor? Action! 643 00:36:39,491 --> 00:36:40,492 Go! 644 00:36:41,493 --> 00:36:44,495 I'm not leaving! Not without you, Derek. 645 00:36:44,496 --> 00:36:47,623 This thing's got me. The world's depending on you. 646 00:36:47,624 --> 00:36:49,667 I'm depending on you. 647 00:36:49,668 --> 00:36:52,420 Goddamn it! I love you, Derek van Hoyle! 648 00:36:52,421 --> 00:36:54,131 It's just-- I can't-- 649 00:36:55,340 --> 00:36:58,467 - Put your face right up next to the snake. - I don't like this. 650 00:36:58,468 --> 00:37:00,803 - I don't want to do it anymore. - Get a tiny bit closer. 651 00:37:00,804 --> 00:37:02,638 Get closer. He's friendly. 652 00:37:02,639 --> 00:37:05,474 - I think you got it, dude! - No, I don't quite have it! 653 00:37:05,475 --> 00:37:08,019 - Doug, you got the shot! You got the shot! - Hold it! Just a couple more beats. 654 00:37:08,020 --> 00:37:10,354 This is gold. Just give me one more second. 655 00:37:10,355 --> 00:37:12,565 One inch closer to your face. 656 00:37:12,566 --> 00:37:14,401 Get it right up in there! 657 00:37:14,985 --> 00:37:17,196 You're a hero! No! 658 00:37:18,238 --> 00:37:19,448 No! 659 00:37:38,550 --> 00:37:41,929 Oh, shit. 660 00:37:46,141 --> 00:37:48,810 I know you think this is strange. 661 00:37:50,604 --> 00:37:53,941 A grown man getting emotional over some dead snake. 662 00:37:54,441 --> 00:37:55,526 Jesus. 663 00:37:56,068 --> 00:37:58,110 But I loved him, 664 00:37:58,111 --> 00:38:01,114 and he loved me back, whatever way he could. 665 00:38:04,493 --> 00:38:07,204 God. No! 666 00:38:08,288 --> 00:38:09,957 Why is Kenny crying? 667 00:38:13,669 --> 00:38:16,462 Hey. I don't want you here. Not for this! 668 00:38:16,463 --> 00:38:18,089 He tried to murder me. 669 00:38:18,090 --> 00:38:19,173 - Griff? - What? 670 00:38:19,174 --> 00:38:21,926 - Let the man grieve. - You murdered my friend. 671 00:38:21,927 --> 00:38:23,302 Just get out of my face. 672 00:38:23,303 --> 00:38:26,347 - What... Where am I supposed to go? - Griff! Go! Just move! 673 00:38:26,348 --> 00:38:27,349 Fine! 674 00:38:48,620 --> 00:38:53,709 Go in peace, my friend 675 00:38:56,086 --> 00:39:01,591 May the divine snakes welcome you 676 00:39:01,592 --> 00:39:05,095 My dear friend 677 00:39:05,804 --> 00:39:09,390 - Snakedy snake - Snakedy snake, yeah 678 00:39:09,391 --> 00:39:12,935 Snakedy snake 679 00:39:12,936 --> 00:39:16,814 May the divine snakes 680 00:39:16,815 --> 00:39:21,278 Welcome you, welcome you... 681 00:39:21,987 --> 00:39:23,530 What do you see? 682 00:39:24,698 --> 00:39:27,659 They're doing some sort of weird snake funeral. 683 00:39:28,452 --> 00:39:30,495 Snake funeral? 684 00:39:54,811 --> 00:39:58,023 Sorry, I thought I heard something. 685 00:40:19,753 --> 00:40:20,796 Timo? 686 00:40:22,840 --> 00:40:23,924 Timo! 687 00:40:37,855 --> 00:40:40,857 - No. Not you. No. Just-- - I know, I'm sorry... I don't mean-- 688 00:40:40,858 --> 00:40:43,359 - I'm not trying to disturb you. - Just leave me alone. 689 00:40:43,360 --> 00:40:44,902 I'm sorry for your loss. 690 00:40:44,903 --> 00:40:47,822 I know you don't believe me, but it's true. I really am. 691 00:40:47,823 --> 00:40:52,077 A friend of mine died once too, and it hurts. 692 00:40:53,996 --> 00:40:54,997 Was it a snake? 693 00:40:55,581 --> 00:40:56,832 Was it a snake? 694 00:40:58,333 --> 00:40:59,625 No. 695 00:40:59,626 --> 00:41:03,547 It was just a... human person. 696 00:41:04,840 --> 00:41:06,300 Yeah, still sad, right? 697 00:41:07,676 --> 00:41:10,846 Totally. Anyway, I just wanted to say I'm sorry. 698 00:41:11,889 --> 00:41:12,890 Beer? 699 00:41:13,765 --> 00:41:17,768 Well, I have my pills here, but, yeah. Let's mix it up. 700 00:41:17,769 --> 00:41:22,274 A few commercials, TV. Did a few episodes of S.W.A.T. 701 00:41:23,400 --> 00:41:24,483 - S.W.A.T.? - Yeah. 702 00:41:24,484 --> 00:41:25,568 I like that one. 703 00:41:25,569 --> 00:41:29,989 I swear, I even had the last line-- Thanks. 704 00:41:29,990 --> 00:41:31,407 The last-- Thanks. 705 00:41:31,408 --> 00:41:33,868 - Last line of season three. - So, what happened? 706 00:41:33,869 --> 00:41:36,954 Well, the producers decided that they didn't really need that character, 707 00:41:36,955 --> 00:41:38,457 so they got rid of me. 708 00:41:39,583 --> 00:41:43,003 I mean, it's only been going about eight or nine more seasons. 709 00:41:44,463 --> 00:41:45,506 They don't deserve you. 710 00:41:46,381 --> 00:41:47,633 Yeah, you're a star. 711 00:41:50,010 --> 00:41:52,513 - Thank you. - Yeah. You've been in movies? 712 00:41:53,096 --> 00:41:56,098 - I'm in an industrial... - You know what movie I like? 713 00:41:56,099 --> 00:41:58,644 - What? - The Legend of Bagger Vance. 714 00:41:59,853 --> 00:42:03,105 - You should do a movie like that. - Man, I wish. 715 00:42:03,106 --> 00:42:03,941 Yeah. 716 00:42:05,567 --> 00:42:08,152 - I like you. - I like you too. 717 00:42:08,153 --> 00:42:09,445 - You know what? - What? 718 00:42:09,446 --> 00:42:12,615 I'll get a new snake for your movie now. 719 00:42:12,616 --> 00:42:13,866 - Really? - Yes. 720 00:42:13,867 --> 00:42:15,952 Oh, my God. Thank you so much. 721 00:42:15,953 --> 00:42:18,038 Yeah. You come with me, of course. 722 00:42:19,540 --> 00:42:20,374 What? 723 00:42:22,709 --> 00:42:26,338 Should we be in here? Maybe we should head back. 724 00:42:31,385 --> 00:42:34,012 What was that? What was that? 725 00:42:36,431 --> 00:42:37,266 Listen. 726 00:42:38,392 --> 00:42:39,726 There are snakes around here. 727 00:42:40,227 --> 00:42:41,353 I can feel it. 728 00:42:42,604 --> 00:42:43,772 What does it feel like? 729 00:42:44,690 --> 00:42:47,733 I don't know. It's just very snaky. 730 00:42:47,734 --> 00:42:49,611 What's-- It's snaky? 731 00:42:57,160 --> 00:43:00,455 They hear from vibrations on the ground. 732 00:43:02,583 --> 00:43:04,960 Every step we take, 733 00:43:05,627 --> 00:43:07,921 drawing them closer. 734 00:43:09,256 --> 00:43:11,633 And when the jungle goes quiet... 735 00:43:15,179 --> 00:43:17,181 that's when you know they're close. 736 00:43:24,938 --> 00:43:26,064 Yeah. 737 00:43:33,989 --> 00:43:37,033 Hey, maybe we should go back to the boat, huh? 738 00:43:37,034 --> 00:43:39,494 Think it'd be a good idea to go back to the boat. Let's go back to the boat. 739 00:43:41,246 --> 00:43:42,456 Santiago. 740 00:43:43,248 --> 00:43:44,291 Santiago. 741 00:43:45,667 --> 00:43:46,793 Santiago! 742 00:43:51,006 --> 00:43:52,007 Nope. 743 00:44:15,030 --> 00:44:16,532 Where are you? 744 00:44:34,174 --> 00:44:37,009 Hey. Have you seen Santiago? I don't think he's come back. 745 00:44:37,010 --> 00:44:41,097 - Back? From what? - We went out to go get a new snake. We-- 746 00:44:41,098 --> 00:44:43,683 You went to find a snake in the middle of the night? 747 00:44:43,684 --> 00:44:46,018 Yeah, we need one for the movie. It was dark. We got separated. 748 00:44:46,019 --> 00:44:47,186 It was crazy out there. 749 00:44:47,187 --> 00:44:48,688 - Griff, Griff, Griff, Griff. - What? 750 00:44:48,689 --> 00:44:51,858 You went out in the middle of the night to find a juicy snake in the jungle? 751 00:44:51,859 --> 00:44:53,485 You know what that's called? 752 00:44:54,528 --> 00:44:55,529 Producing. 753 00:44:56,530 --> 00:44:59,115 - Really? - I guarantee he will be back 754 00:44:59,116 --> 00:45:03,953 with a giant snake, and you and I are making movies. 755 00:45:03,954 --> 00:45:06,539 You're right. Santiago's a pro. He'll be fine. 756 00:45:06,540 --> 00:45:08,876 If he's not back soon, we'll go look for him. 757 00:45:31,648 --> 00:45:34,359 Thank you very much, Santiago. 758 00:45:37,863 --> 00:45:40,239 Guys, it's been over an hour. I have to go find him. 759 00:45:40,240 --> 00:45:41,908 Well, you're not going alone. 760 00:45:41,909 --> 00:45:44,077 Yeah, we're definitely coming with you. It's safer that way. 761 00:45:44,578 --> 00:45:46,413 Have you guys tried this thing? 762 00:45:46,955 --> 00:45:52,669 It's like a warm bowl of soup but... but in chair form. 763 00:45:53,337 --> 00:45:54,755 Yeah, man. Chairs. 764 00:45:55,631 --> 00:45:57,174 They, like, hold you, man. 765 00:45:57,925 --> 00:46:00,260 They literally have arms, right? 766 00:46:02,596 --> 00:46:03,722 Wow. 767 00:46:04,348 --> 00:46:06,141 Like when your parents are gone... 768 00:46:09,353 --> 00:46:11,104 we still have chairs, you know? 769 00:46:13,023 --> 00:46:15,316 What the hell are you talking about? 770 00:46:15,317 --> 00:46:17,235 Let's go find Santiago. 771 00:46:17,236 --> 00:46:19,195 Let's get a snake for our snake movie. 772 00:46:19,196 --> 00:46:21,281 Yeah, Santiago! Let's go! 773 00:46:28,789 --> 00:46:32,084 Hey, what direction are we headed in? 774 00:46:34,503 --> 00:46:35,712 Like, that way. 775 00:46:36,255 --> 00:46:38,881 Wait. Kenny, are you high right now? 776 00:46:38,882 --> 00:46:41,008 Yeah, but I'm good. I already peaked. 777 00:46:41,009 --> 00:46:42,385 Jesus Christ, Kenny. 778 00:46:42,386 --> 00:46:43,887 We're completely lost. 779 00:46:46,473 --> 00:46:48,809 Wait. You guys, this way. 780 00:46:49,393 --> 00:46:51,186 It looks like an old camper van. 781 00:47:08,745 --> 00:47:10,288 Ana is not on the boat. 782 00:47:10,289 --> 00:47:13,833 I need you to search the area. 783 00:47:13,834 --> 00:47:16,252 The men are scared to go deeper into the jungle. 784 00:47:16,253 --> 00:47:18,547 I don't care, we have to find her. 785 00:47:23,635 --> 00:47:24,927 What is that? 786 00:47:24,928 --> 00:47:27,555 Maybe Santiago's sleeping in there. 787 00:47:27,556 --> 00:47:28,557 Hola. 788 00:47:33,312 --> 00:47:36,273 Looks totally abandoned. Anybody home? 789 00:47:42,404 --> 00:47:44,030 Maybe some food and water. 790 00:47:44,031 --> 00:47:45,489 Yeah. We could stay here. 791 00:47:45,490 --> 00:47:46,617 At least tonight. 792 00:47:51,705 --> 00:47:55,125 Oh, man, there's gotta be snacks in here. 793 00:48:24,071 --> 00:48:25,321 Oh, my God. 794 00:48:25,322 --> 00:48:26,447 - Oh, God. - Santiago! 795 00:48:26,448 --> 00:48:27,658 Oh, God. 796 00:48:28,325 --> 00:48:29,326 Dang! 797 00:48:30,327 --> 00:48:31,994 That's where that guy went! 798 00:48:31,995 --> 00:48:33,830 Oh, my God. What is out there? 799 00:48:44,925 --> 00:48:46,884 - We gotta go now! - Okay. Go, go, go. 800 00:48:46,885 --> 00:48:48,803 - Let's get out of here. - Let's go, let's go. 801 00:48:48,804 --> 00:48:50,972 - We can't let it crush the van. - Crush the van? 802 00:48:50,973 --> 00:48:52,723 - It's not working. - What? 803 00:48:52,724 --> 00:48:53,808 - It's not-- - Damn it! 804 00:48:53,809 --> 00:48:55,560 - It's a camper van, probably! - Oh, God! 805 00:48:55,561 --> 00:48:57,770 It's got a split-charge battery. 806 00:48:57,771 --> 00:49:00,231 The relay probably popped off. It's underneath the hood. 807 00:49:00,232 --> 00:49:01,649 Kenny, can you fix it? 808 00:49:01,650 --> 00:49:04,026 Usually I could fix it, yes, but I'm having-- 809 00:49:04,027 --> 00:49:07,238 I'm still having some visual problems because of the... 810 00:49:07,239 --> 00:49:08,739 You did it to me again. 811 00:49:08,740 --> 00:49:13,452 You did it on the wedding video and now you're wasted off your ass again. 812 00:49:13,453 --> 00:49:15,454 I'm really sorry, boss. 813 00:49:15,455 --> 00:49:18,749 Buffalo sober. You're Buffalo sober. 814 00:49:18,750 --> 00:49:19,834 Do you have any more? 815 00:49:19,835 --> 00:49:22,044 Griff, please can you fix it? 816 00:49:22,045 --> 00:49:24,046 I think I'm better suited to be our wheel man. 817 00:49:24,047 --> 00:49:26,174 What are you talking about? I've always been a better driver than you. 818 00:49:26,175 --> 00:49:27,216 No, you've been a safer driver. 819 00:49:27,217 --> 00:49:29,385 I passed the driver's test on my first try. 820 00:49:29,386 --> 00:49:30,803 You took three times. 821 00:49:30,804 --> 00:49:32,305 Yeah, but that was 'cause of yield. 822 00:49:32,306 --> 00:49:34,098 I didn't know-- Now I know what that is. 823 00:49:34,099 --> 00:49:36,310 Oh, my God. We're gonna die. 824 00:49:38,478 --> 00:49:39,521 Sorry. 825 00:49:41,315 --> 00:49:42,357 I'll just fix it. 826 00:50:59,059 --> 00:51:00,435 - Doug! - Go, go, go! 827 00:51:01,228 --> 00:51:02,813 Let me get up. Hey, wait! Stop! Stop! 828 00:51:03,313 --> 00:51:05,691 Griff, where are you going? Don't leave without me! 829 00:51:08,819 --> 00:51:09,987 Oh, shit! 830 00:51:12,823 --> 00:51:14,031 You saw it, right? 831 00:51:14,032 --> 00:51:15,783 What was that? They're not supposed to get that big. 832 00:51:15,784 --> 00:51:17,911 Oh, God. It was like a dinosaur. 833 00:51:22,916 --> 00:51:23,917 Hey! 834 00:51:26,753 --> 00:51:28,713 Hey, maybe we can ask these guys for help. 835 00:51:28,714 --> 00:51:29,630 - Hey! - Hey! 836 00:51:29,631 --> 00:51:31,966 - We have to stop. - Do not stop the car. 837 00:51:31,967 --> 00:51:33,342 Ana, what is going on? 838 00:51:33,343 --> 00:51:36,304 They're illegal gold miners who patrol the jungles around here. 839 00:51:36,305 --> 00:51:37,763 These guys are dangerous. 840 00:51:37,764 --> 00:51:40,683 They'll kill anyone who crosses into their territory. 841 00:51:40,684 --> 00:51:42,895 - Oh, shit. They're trying to kill us. - Fuck! 842 00:51:43,687 --> 00:51:45,272 Why are they shooting at us? 843 00:51:47,065 --> 00:51:48,734 Griff, can't you drive any faster. 844 00:51:52,154 --> 00:51:53,405 Ana, what are you doing? 845 00:51:57,409 --> 00:51:59,912 - Kenny, are you getting this? - Yes! 846 00:52:01,246 --> 00:52:02,581 Keep rolling! 847 00:52:05,709 --> 00:52:07,961 Griff, faster. 848 00:52:11,215 --> 00:52:12,591 Only one left. 849 00:52:36,198 --> 00:52:38,241 - Where is she? - Oh, my God. 850 00:52:38,242 --> 00:52:39,284 Where is she? 851 00:52:42,371 --> 00:52:44,288 Who? Who do... Who do you mean? 852 00:52:44,289 --> 00:52:45,873 I know there's someone else here. 853 00:52:45,874 --> 00:52:48,585 So, where is she-- 854 00:52:53,465 --> 00:52:54,466 Let's go, come on. 855 00:52:55,008 --> 00:52:56,134 We gotta go. Fast. 856 00:52:58,178 --> 00:53:00,179 Look, I can get you guys out of here. 857 00:53:00,180 --> 00:53:02,307 All we need to do is keep heading north. 858 00:53:02,808 --> 00:53:06,102 There's a small airport about a day and a half from here. 859 00:53:06,103 --> 00:53:07,895 You can get us home? 860 00:53:07,896 --> 00:53:09,605 - Yes. - Get us home. 861 00:53:09,606 --> 00:53:10,899 I think we gotta call it. 862 00:53:11,483 --> 00:53:14,236 Man, we've got such good stuff, and we're so close. 863 00:53:14,736 --> 00:53:17,864 Really? We're going home? 864 00:53:17,865 --> 00:53:18,948 Buddy, I know. 865 00:53:18,949 --> 00:53:21,534 I don't wanna go home empty-handed either. 866 00:53:21,535 --> 00:53:24,246 But we came out here to make Anaconda, 867 00:53:24,746 --> 00:53:25,956 and now we're in it. 868 00:53:29,501 --> 00:53:30,544 Yeah. 869 00:53:34,339 --> 00:53:35,465 I'm sorry. 870 00:54:14,671 --> 00:54:17,924 Guys, emergency meeting. 871 00:54:17,925 --> 00:54:19,926 Cast and crew only. Kenny, sit down. 872 00:54:19,927 --> 00:54:21,761 - What is that? - New pages. 873 00:54:21,762 --> 00:54:23,554 We have some time before the next port 874 00:54:23,555 --> 00:54:27,934 and I had an idea last night that I think is just too damn good not to shoot. 875 00:54:27,935 --> 00:54:30,728 Doug, everybody's pretty burnt, man. 876 00:54:30,729 --> 00:54:32,980 Just hear me out. I'm begging you please, Kenny. 877 00:54:32,981 --> 00:54:35,066 - All right. Sorry, boss. - Thank you. 878 00:54:35,067 --> 00:54:38,027 What if you two, on your way to find the anaconda, 879 00:54:38,028 --> 00:54:41,114 ran into a total badass on an incredible quest? 880 00:54:42,157 --> 00:54:43,407 That's interesting. 881 00:54:43,408 --> 00:54:46,911 Let me guess, to expose illegal gold miners? 882 00:54:46,912 --> 00:54:47,828 Bingo. 883 00:54:47,829 --> 00:54:49,956 - Raises the stakes. - Exactly. 884 00:54:49,957 --> 00:54:51,958 And while they're hunting down this mythical snake, 885 00:54:51,959 --> 00:54:54,044 they actually end up fighting the real villain. 886 00:54:54,628 --> 00:54:55,711 An even bigger snake. 887 00:54:55,712 --> 00:54:58,256 - Man. - Oh, yeah. Yes. 888 00:54:58,257 --> 00:54:59,549 Man. 889 00:54:59,550 --> 00:55:00,968 I like this. 890 00:55:01,593 --> 00:55:02,593 This is good. 891 00:55:02,594 --> 00:55:05,764 And if we add this element, it does make the movie much bigger. 892 00:55:06,265 --> 00:55:08,725 Like, now, it's about something. 893 00:55:10,853 --> 00:55:11,770 Themes. 894 00:55:12,396 --> 00:55:13,522 Themes. 895 00:55:20,946 --> 00:55:22,238 Yeah. 896 00:55:22,239 --> 00:55:24,115 Okay. You know what, guys? 897 00:55:24,116 --> 00:55:26,702 I didn't wanna say anything before, but... 898 00:55:28,871 --> 00:55:30,581 this thing might be an Awards play. 899 00:55:32,416 --> 00:55:35,376 I mean, the Academy loves social horror. 900 00:55:35,377 --> 00:55:36,461 - Right? - Yeah. 901 00:55:37,880 --> 00:55:41,508 Dude, you could be the white Jordan Peele. 902 00:55:42,551 --> 00:55:44,261 I was thinking the same thing. 903 00:55:47,598 --> 00:55:49,308 We've been through so much, you guys. 904 00:55:49,933 --> 00:55:51,643 Let's finish this movie. 905 00:55:53,937 --> 00:55:55,354 I'm in. 906 00:55:55,355 --> 00:55:57,065 - Let's do it. - Yeah. 907 00:55:57,608 --> 00:56:01,987 Who are you gonna get to play this new, awesome character? 908 00:56:09,244 --> 00:56:11,287 And cut. Yes! 909 00:56:11,288 --> 00:56:12,830 - Was it good? - That's what I'm talking about. 910 00:56:12,831 --> 00:56:13,748 - Nice. - Yeah. 911 00:56:13,749 --> 00:56:16,125 - You sure you've never acted before? - I swear. 912 00:56:16,126 --> 00:56:17,920 Some of the best acting I've ever seen. 913 00:56:18,545 --> 00:56:21,130 - You're a natural. You're incredible. - Thank you. 914 00:56:21,131 --> 00:56:22,799 Take five. Next up, we got 72. 915 00:56:23,634 --> 00:56:27,094 - Guys, you see what I'm saying? - Yeah. 916 00:56:27,095 --> 00:56:28,763 - She's incredible, right? - Yeah. 917 00:56:28,764 --> 00:56:30,599 Hey, a question, though. 918 00:56:31,517 --> 00:56:35,228 If she saves us, it doesn't really give my character anything to do. 919 00:56:35,229 --> 00:56:36,354 Yeah. 920 00:56:36,355 --> 00:56:40,483 This was supposed to be the moment where my character starts falling for Derek, 921 00:56:40,484 --> 00:56:44,487 so he needs to do something heroic, you know? Unselfish. 922 00:56:44,488 --> 00:56:47,114 I don't know, you guys, this just feels like her moment, 923 00:56:47,115 --> 00:56:49,201 she actually did it in real life. 924 00:56:49,743 --> 00:56:52,370 But good news, I'm gonna shoot all the rest on her 925 00:56:52,371 --> 00:56:54,122 so you guys have the day off. 926 00:56:54,623 --> 00:56:56,041 See you later. 927 00:56:57,125 --> 00:56:58,627 Take the day off. 928 00:57:07,052 --> 00:57:10,763 This is our movie, Griff, and he's just cutting us out. 929 00:57:10,764 --> 00:57:12,682 Yep. Welcome to show business, baby. 930 00:57:12,683 --> 00:57:15,936 You're not in it unless you're getting screwed over by your friends. 931 00:57:17,479 --> 00:57:18,564 Yeah. 932 00:57:20,482 --> 00:57:24,111 You ever wake up and wonder what the hell have I done with my life? 933 00:57:24,903 --> 00:57:27,572 Oh, yeah. Like, every day. 934 00:57:27,573 --> 00:57:30,157 Hey, at least you had the guts to go after what you wanted. 935 00:57:30,158 --> 00:57:32,035 - No. - You think I wanted to go to law school? 936 00:57:32,536 --> 00:57:34,412 What have I got to show for it though? 937 00:57:34,413 --> 00:57:35,496 You know what I have? 938 00:57:35,497 --> 00:57:39,376 I have a terrible apartment and a 74-year-old roommate. 939 00:57:41,128 --> 00:57:44,464 Sometimes I go to Trader Joe's just to feel air conditioning. 940 00:57:46,091 --> 00:57:47,551 You at least have a career. 941 00:57:49,052 --> 00:57:51,054 I mean, what do I have to show for it? 942 00:57:52,264 --> 00:57:55,267 I've got no family. No career. 943 00:57:56,185 --> 00:57:58,102 Never done anything that matters. 944 00:57:58,103 --> 00:57:59,563 No nothing. 945 00:58:01,982 --> 00:58:03,192 It's never too late. 946 00:58:12,492 --> 00:58:14,160 Griff, I know you're in there. 947 00:58:14,161 --> 00:58:15,454 Let's make a movie. 948 00:58:19,958 --> 00:58:21,042 Hola, amigo. 949 00:58:21,043 --> 00:58:23,961 Jesus. Come on, get dressed. We've got a packed day. 950 00:58:23,962 --> 00:58:27,673 What are you talking about? I am dressed. I'm dressed really... very nicely. 951 00:58:27,674 --> 00:58:29,634 All right. Can you just take a cold shower? 952 00:58:29,635 --> 00:58:31,052 We gotta film, like, now. 953 00:58:31,053 --> 00:58:33,055 Here's an idea. You know what you should call the movie? 954 00:58:33,555 --> 00:58:35,599 Ana-conda. Get it? 955 00:58:36,099 --> 00:58:38,059 Ana-conda, 'cause of Ana. 956 00:58:38,060 --> 00:58:40,061 Can you just get in costume? 957 00:58:40,062 --> 00:58:42,523 Man, you know what? You wouldn't even be here if it wasn't for me. 958 00:58:43,023 --> 00:58:44,857 Without me, you'd still be stuck in Buffalo 959 00:58:44,858 --> 00:58:47,152 shooting your bullshit wedding videos. 960 00:58:48,195 --> 00:58:49,111 Films. 961 00:58:49,112 --> 00:58:51,030 Yeah, you can tell yourself that. 962 00:58:51,031 --> 00:58:53,908 My God, you know what? I vouched for you too. 963 00:58:53,909 --> 00:58:56,202 Even the rights holders, they're like, "Who is this guy?" 964 00:58:56,203 --> 00:58:57,788 I said, "Trust me. He's good." 965 00:58:59,748 --> 00:59:00,749 What is that? 966 00:59:04,670 --> 00:59:09,632 Attention, all crew. Let's get prepped for scene 85, location Bravo. 967 00:59:09,633 --> 00:59:11,050 Five minutes. 968 00:59:11,051 --> 00:59:14,220 - Are they making a movie? - Five minutes to arrival. 969 00:59:14,221 --> 00:59:17,515 Excuse me, are you guys shooting a movie? 970 00:59:17,516 --> 00:59:19,643 We're doing a reboot of Anaconda. 971 00:59:20,435 --> 00:59:21,436 Come again? 972 00:59:21,979 --> 00:59:24,731 - A reboot of Anaconda. - Anaconda? 973 00:59:25,232 --> 00:59:27,483 - Like, Ice Cube Anaconda? - Yeah. 974 00:59:27,484 --> 00:59:29,111 Sony is rebooting it. 975 00:59:29,653 --> 00:59:32,072 I know. No new ideas. 976 00:59:46,128 --> 00:59:47,504 That's weird. 977 00:59:49,631 --> 00:59:51,008 So, let me get this straight. 978 00:59:51,633 --> 00:59:54,178 You don't have the rights to Anaconda? 979 00:59:55,387 --> 00:59:56,388 No, well, I... 980 00:59:57,598 --> 00:59:58,891 Not legally. 981 00:59:59,600 --> 01:00:02,603 And you've never owned the rights to Anaconda? 982 01:00:05,480 --> 01:00:07,148 I mean, who owns Anaconda? 983 01:00:07,149 --> 01:00:10,026 Sony. Sony owns Anaconda. 984 01:00:10,027 --> 01:00:11,277 Yeah, no, no, I know. I know. 985 01:00:11,278 --> 01:00:14,280 I mean, like, you know, like, in the larger sense. 986 01:00:14,281 --> 01:00:16,741 Why would you tell us that you had the rights 987 01:00:16,742 --> 01:00:19,327 to the goddamn Anaconda franchise 988 01:00:19,328 --> 01:00:24,207 when you very much don't have the rights to the goddamn Anaconda franchise? 989 01:00:24,208 --> 01:00:27,043 Do we really even need the rights? 990 01:00:27,044 --> 01:00:28,587 Really? I mean, like, who gives a shit? 991 01:00:30,506 --> 01:00:32,256 - About IP? - Yeah. 992 01:00:32,257 --> 01:00:33,800 Literally everyone. 993 01:00:34,468 --> 01:00:37,553 That's what big movies are! That's why we're here! 994 01:00:37,554 --> 01:00:40,181 - You think that's why we're here? - Yes, that's why we're here! 995 01:00:40,182 --> 01:00:41,641 We almost died! 996 01:00:41,642 --> 01:00:45,603 We're out in the middle of the goddamn jungle for a lie! 997 01:00:45,604 --> 01:00:47,147 I had to lie! 998 01:00:48,023 --> 01:00:50,191 I had to lie to you! You wouldn't have come otherwise! 999 01:00:50,192 --> 01:00:52,027 You wouldn't... None of you would have-- 1000 01:00:52,903 --> 01:00:54,862 - Bullshit! - Not bullshit. 1001 01:00:54,863 --> 01:00:57,198 It's why you never came out to LA with me in the first place, 1002 01:00:57,199 --> 01:01:00,243 even though we had a whole plan to work together. 1003 01:01:00,244 --> 01:01:03,247 Your whole life, you've just-- it's been dictated by fear. 1004 01:01:05,123 --> 01:01:06,124 Griff, 1005 01:01:07,751 --> 01:01:08,794 you're fired. 1006 01:01:09,503 --> 01:01:11,171 - What? - You're fired. 1007 01:01:14,216 --> 01:01:15,383 No. No, I'm not. 1008 01:01:15,384 --> 01:01:17,094 You can't fire me. You know why? 1009 01:01:17,845 --> 01:01:19,638 Because I quit already. 1010 01:01:20,597 --> 01:01:21,473 Last night. 1011 01:01:24,852 --> 01:01:26,353 I just didn't tell anybody yet. 1012 01:01:27,479 --> 01:01:28,480 So... 1013 01:01:31,024 --> 01:01:33,610 Too bad for you, I guess, because I already quit. 1014 01:01:48,542 --> 01:01:50,002 Griff, wait! 1015 01:01:50,919 --> 01:01:52,753 Where are you even gonna go? 1016 01:01:52,754 --> 01:01:54,255 To find the Anaconda boat. 1017 01:01:54,256 --> 01:01:55,673 Maybe they can help me get home. 1018 01:01:55,674 --> 01:01:58,009 Just think about this. It's not safe. 1019 01:01:58,010 --> 01:01:59,468 That's a tiny boat. 1020 01:01:59,469 --> 01:02:01,346 There's a giant snake out there. 1021 01:02:04,141 --> 01:02:05,684 Please don't do this. 1022 01:02:08,645 --> 01:02:09,855 Griff. 1023 01:02:52,481 --> 01:02:53,524 J.Lo? 1024 01:02:54,107 --> 01:02:55,192 Ice Cube? 1025 01:02:56,818 --> 01:02:59,862 Jon Voight? Are you in this one? 1026 01:02:59,863 --> 01:03:00,988 Help me! 1027 01:03:00,989 --> 01:03:02,365 Help me, man! Help me! 1028 01:03:02,366 --> 01:03:03,699 - Hey! - Help me! 1029 01:03:03,700 --> 01:03:05,910 - It's okay. It's okay. - Help! Help me! 1030 01:03:05,911 --> 01:03:07,578 - Calm down. I'll come get you. - Oh, my... 1031 01:03:07,579 --> 01:03:09,622 It's okay. You're safe. 1032 01:03:09,623 --> 01:03:10,958 - You're safe. - Oh, thank God. 1033 01:03:11,667 --> 01:03:13,877 Oh, shit! Oh, God! 1034 01:03:19,216 --> 01:03:20,217 Oh, God! 1035 01:03:21,885 --> 01:03:25,055 Oh, my God! Oh, my God! Oh, my God! 1036 01:03:27,683 --> 01:03:28,684 Doug! 1037 01:03:29,184 --> 01:03:31,394 Doug, what's going on? Why have we stopped? 1038 01:03:31,395 --> 01:03:35,356 Well, Ana found a great place to shoot the next scene. 1039 01:03:35,357 --> 01:03:36,732 - To shoot? - The next scene? What? 1040 01:03:36,733 --> 01:03:39,402 Look. Look, okay, I know. Losing Griff was hard, 1041 01:03:39,403 --> 01:03:41,904 but between the four of us, we can finish this film. 1042 01:03:41,905 --> 01:03:43,281 I'm not going home empty-handed. 1043 01:03:43,282 --> 01:03:45,575 Come on, man. Without Griff... 1044 01:03:45,576 --> 01:03:47,201 That's not part of the plan. 1045 01:03:47,202 --> 01:03:50,121 Well, plans change and that's part of filmmaking too. 1046 01:03:50,122 --> 01:03:52,206 No, no, Doug, we have to go back for him. 1047 01:03:52,207 --> 01:03:53,624 - He's not safe out there. - Yeah. 1048 01:03:53,625 --> 01:03:55,376 Ana. We need to turn the boat around. 1049 01:03:55,377 --> 01:03:57,211 We are not turning the boat around. 1050 01:03:57,212 --> 01:03:59,046 Yeah, we're not turning the boat around. 1051 01:03:59,047 --> 01:04:01,465 Everyone off the boat now. 1052 01:04:01,466 --> 01:04:02,342 What's going on? 1053 01:04:04,052 --> 01:04:06,220 Ana, what are you doing? 1054 01:04:06,221 --> 01:04:07,972 This definitely isn't the plan. 1055 01:04:07,973 --> 01:04:09,932 Well, plans change, Doug. 1056 01:04:09,933 --> 01:04:11,476 Isn't that filmmaking? 1057 01:04:12,436 --> 01:04:14,563 And every good film needs a bit of a twist. 1058 01:04:15,272 --> 01:04:18,025 Everyone off the boat now! 1059 01:05:10,369 --> 01:05:11,370 To the dock. 1060 01:05:37,938 --> 01:05:40,231 You're gonna carry these for me back to the boat. Let's go. 1061 01:05:40,232 --> 01:05:41,275 And then what? 1062 01:05:42,317 --> 01:05:43,609 And then you're gonna shoot us? 1063 01:05:43,610 --> 01:05:44,653 Now! 1064 01:05:46,154 --> 01:05:47,321 I'm not going anywhere 1065 01:05:47,322 --> 01:05:49,615 until you tell me what's inside these bags. 1066 01:05:49,616 --> 01:05:51,994 You wanna look at it? Look at it. 1067 01:05:59,668 --> 01:06:01,962 Wait. Is... Is that... 1068 01:06:03,422 --> 01:06:04,505 Gold? 1069 01:06:04,506 --> 01:06:07,466 So you're the miner? You did all of this for money? 1070 01:06:07,467 --> 01:06:08,552 Very quick, Claire. 1071 01:06:10,512 --> 01:06:11,555 No! 1072 01:06:12,389 --> 01:06:14,515 I'm not gonna be part of your sick quest for-- 1073 01:06:14,516 --> 01:06:15,391 Holy shit. 1074 01:06:15,392 --> 01:06:16,268 Drop it. 1075 01:06:16,768 --> 01:06:17,936 Drop the gun. 1076 01:06:18,520 --> 01:06:19,771 The gun. 1077 01:06:21,607 --> 01:06:22,357 Now! 1078 01:06:22,482 --> 01:06:23,650 Calm down. 1079 01:06:27,571 --> 01:06:29,031 And you, don't move! 1080 01:06:33,410 --> 01:06:34,660 I'm with the government. 1081 01:06:34,661 --> 01:06:36,704 We track illegal gold miners. 1082 01:06:36,705 --> 01:06:39,708 And Ana here runs one of the biggest rings in Brazil. 1083 01:06:40,709 --> 01:06:42,627 This gold can change your life. 1084 01:06:42,628 --> 01:06:44,504 You think I care about gold? 1085 01:06:44,505 --> 01:06:45,755 Don't trust anything she says. 1086 01:06:45,756 --> 01:06:47,882 She's a liar. She's a damn liar. 1087 01:06:47,883 --> 01:06:49,592 We're filmmakers from Buffalo. 1088 01:06:49,593 --> 01:06:52,094 We're working on a spiritual sequel to Anaconda, 1089 01:06:52,095 --> 01:06:54,805 and I don't know if she mentioned that, but it's not just a reboot, 1090 01:06:54,806 --> 01:06:56,682 and I kicked out my friend who had the lead, 1091 01:06:56,683 --> 01:06:58,976 and I gave her a juicy-ass role, 1092 01:06:58,977 --> 01:07:00,228 - and this is how she treats-- - Really juicy! 1093 01:07:00,229 --> 01:07:02,939 Shut up! I don't know what you're talking about, man. 1094 01:07:02,940 --> 01:07:04,982 Off-topic. Go, arrest her. 1095 01:07:04,983 --> 01:07:06,068 Thank God. 1096 01:07:19,373 --> 01:07:20,499 Oh, my God! 1097 01:07:22,751 --> 01:07:24,378 Who shot me? 1098 01:07:25,838 --> 01:07:27,380 That'd be me, asshole. 1099 01:07:27,381 --> 01:07:30,049 Griff, no. He was a good guy. 1100 01:07:30,050 --> 01:07:32,009 - I'm a good guy. - He's a cop. 1101 01:07:32,010 --> 01:07:33,053 Look, I don't-- What? 1102 01:07:34,680 --> 01:07:36,138 I'm a good guy. 1103 01:07:36,139 --> 01:07:38,684 Drop it. On your knees now, the four of you, facing the water. 1104 01:07:40,519 --> 01:07:41,979 - Wait. I-- - Now. 1105 01:07:56,201 --> 01:07:58,995 No, no, Ana. Don't do this. 1106 01:07:58,996 --> 01:08:00,788 You too, Claire. On your knees, now. 1107 01:08:00,789 --> 01:08:02,457 You don't have to be this person. 1108 01:08:03,709 --> 01:08:07,004 I have children at home. They're 10 and 13. 1109 01:08:07,504 --> 01:08:08,505 Please. 1110 01:08:09,047 --> 01:08:10,339 Please. 1111 01:08:10,340 --> 01:08:12,341 Think about what you're doing to my kids. 1112 01:08:12,342 --> 01:08:14,344 Just shut your mouth. Turn around now. 1113 01:08:22,227 --> 01:08:23,395 On your knees. 1114 01:08:24,188 --> 01:08:25,397 Now! 1115 01:08:27,482 --> 01:08:29,442 - Toma! - Toma! 1116 01:08:29,443 --> 01:08:31,612 Eat that shit! Nice! 1117 01:08:32,112 --> 01:08:34,865 For the record, that's how you headbutt, bitch! 1118 01:08:39,411 --> 01:08:40,495 You won't do it. 1119 01:08:40,996 --> 01:08:42,830 You don't have the balls. I know you, Claire. 1120 01:08:42,831 --> 01:08:43,874 You don't know me. 1121 01:08:44,374 --> 01:08:45,584 I don't even have kids. 1122 01:08:53,216 --> 01:08:54,426 Jesus Christ! 1123 01:09:00,765 --> 01:09:03,684 - A snake! - No. No, wait. Wait. 1124 01:09:03,685 --> 01:09:05,269 I think the boat is back that way! 1125 01:09:05,270 --> 01:09:07,396 Yeah, but then so is the snake. We can't go that way! 1126 01:09:07,397 --> 01:09:09,898 We gotta take this trail and get to the high ground. 1127 01:09:09,899 --> 01:09:12,151 - Wait. What's that? - What? 1128 01:09:12,152 --> 01:09:13,653 What? 1129 01:09:13,654 --> 01:09:14,654 Shit! 1130 01:09:15,322 --> 01:09:16,656 Oh, my God. 1131 01:09:16,657 --> 01:09:18,824 - Did it bite you? - Yeah, you know what, I think it bit me. 1132 01:09:18,825 --> 01:09:20,785 - I think it got me. - Dougie, I know it hurts, 1133 01:09:20,786 --> 01:09:23,871 but we gotta get out of here now because the snake is out there! 1134 01:09:23,872 --> 01:09:26,916 I'm sorry, I can't move. My leg is freaking out. 1135 01:09:26,917 --> 01:09:28,669 What are we gonna do? 1136 01:09:29,211 --> 01:09:30,754 We're gonna have to piss on you, man. 1137 01:09:31,337 --> 01:09:34,130 - Huh? - On the bite. It's the only way. 1138 01:09:34,131 --> 01:09:35,675 I thought that was just jellyfish. 1139 01:09:35,676 --> 01:09:38,344 No, no, no, no. It's all animals. 1140 01:09:38,345 --> 01:09:39,887 - Are you sure? - Positive. 1141 01:09:39,888 --> 01:09:42,014 Someone's gotta piss. I need one of your pisses. 1142 01:09:42,015 --> 01:09:44,141 I'd love to be able to help out, but I'm just-- 1143 01:09:44,142 --> 01:09:47,353 I am drained, tapped, bone-dry. 1144 01:09:47,354 --> 01:09:49,021 Claire, you wanna take care of this? 1145 01:09:49,022 --> 01:09:50,523 I'm wearing a onesie. 1146 01:09:50,524 --> 01:09:53,067 Kenny, we don't have time to argue about this. You're up. 1147 01:09:53,068 --> 01:09:54,778 You know this isn't possible. 1148 01:09:55,404 --> 01:09:56,529 Why not? 1149 01:09:56,530 --> 01:09:57,781 Because he's... 1150 01:09:58,824 --> 01:09:59,907 Pee shy. 1151 01:09:59,908 --> 01:10:02,118 - Pee shy? - I have urinary stage fright. 1152 01:10:02,119 --> 01:10:05,037 I haven't been able to pee in public in 35 years. 1153 01:10:05,038 --> 01:10:06,706 My life sucks! 1154 01:10:06,707 --> 01:10:07,790 You can do this. 1155 01:10:07,791 --> 01:10:09,293 You have to do this. 1156 01:10:09,918 --> 01:10:11,377 Whiz on me. 1157 01:10:11,378 --> 01:10:13,129 - You got it, buddy. - Okay. 1158 01:10:13,130 --> 01:10:16,048 - Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. - Yeah. 1159 01:10:16,049 --> 01:10:17,341 - You can do it. - You can do it. 1160 01:10:17,342 --> 01:10:19,802 - Let it flow. - Let it flow. Yeah. 1161 01:10:19,803 --> 01:10:22,138 Just piss on me. Come on. Whiz on me. 1162 01:10:22,139 --> 01:10:23,891 Whiz on me. Do it. Whiz on me. 1163 01:10:24,391 --> 01:10:26,560 You... You don't think I want to? 1164 01:10:27,686 --> 01:10:29,771 I would love to piss all over you, man. 1165 01:10:30,480 --> 01:10:32,106 But it's not in the cards! 1166 01:10:32,107 --> 01:10:34,400 - Whiz on me. Now. - I can't. I'm trying. 1167 01:10:34,401 --> 01:10:37,111 - You can do it! Whiz on me! - I'm trying my hardest! 1168 01:10:37,112 --> 01:10:40,948 - Do it, Ken! Do it, Ken. Do it. Do it. - That is an order! Whiz on me now! 1169 01:10:40,949 --> 01:10:43,284 Okay! Okay. 1170 01:10:43,285 --> 01:10:45,287 You got it, buddy. You do it. 1171 01:10:45,996 --> 01:10:48,414 - There's one more problem. - What? 1172 01:10:48,415 --> 01:10:50,416 I haven't told you about this. 1173 01:10:50,417 --> 01:10:52,210 I can only pee sitting down. 1174 01:10:52,211 --> 01:10:53,753 Jesus Christ! 1175 01:10:53,754 --> 01:10:55,255 I need a chair. 1176 01:10:57,466 --> 01:10:59,134 Come on, come on, come on. 1177 01:10:59,927 --> 01:11:01,385 Come on, buddy. 1178 01:11:01,386 --> 01:11:03,054 Come on, Kenny. Come on, come on. 1179 01:11:03,055 --> 01:11:04,305 Just do it. Do it! 1180 01:11:04,306 --> 01:11:05,932 - Come on, buddy. - Do it. 1181 01:11:05,933 --> 01:11:07,059 Come on, buddy. 1182 01:11:14,024 --> 01:11:16,400 - Yeah! - Yeah! 1183 01:11:16,401 --> 01:11:18,945 - Yes! Yes! Yes! - Nice! 1184 01:11:18,946 --> 01:11:22,074 - Yes! Yeah! - Yeah! Yeah! 1185 01:11:32,125 --> 01:11:35,838 Yeah! 1186 01:11:53,897 --> 01:11:58,110 Griff, I'm sorry about what I said before on the boat. 1187 01:11:58,777 --> 01:12:04,116 The truth is, I've been jealous of you for a long, long time. 1188 01:12:04,658 --> 01:12:05,575 Jealous? 1189 01:12:05,576 --> 01:12:07,869 For having the balls to do what I couldn't. 1190 01:12:07,870 --> 01:12:09,328 For going after what you wanted. 1191 01:12:09,329 --> 01:12:11,415 Going to LA and putting yourself on the-- 1192 01:12:14,334 --> 01:12:15,335 Oh, my God! 1193 01:12:15,460 --> 01:12:17,170 - Oh, shit! - Doug! 1194 01:12:17,171 --> 01:12:18,380 Oh, my God! 1195 01:12:20,257 --> 01:12:22,176 We have to go after him! 1196 01:12:22,718 --> 01:12:24,928 - We gotta get out of here. - We do not have a choice. Come on. 1197 01:12:35,939 --> 01:12:36,940 Griff. 1198 01:12:39,318 --> 01:12:40,319 Griff. 1199 01:12:43,447 --> 01:12:44,531 What did I do? 1200 01:12:45,699 --> 01:12:48,576 I tricked him into coming here, and now he's dead. 1201 01:12:48,577 --> 01:12:52,163 No. No. We all chose to be here. 1202 01:12:52,164 --> 01:12:53,373 I wish it was me. 1203 01:12:54,291 --> 01:12:55,500 It should be me. 1204 01:12:55,501 --> 01:12:58,085 This is not your fault, and we have to keep going. 1205 01:12:58,086 --> 01:13:02,299 Hey, guys, I think I found out which way we should go. 1206 01:13:16,563 --> 01:13:17,564 Hey. 1207 01:13:20,526 --> 01:13:21,609 It's a... 1208 01:13:21,610 --> 01:13:23,110 It's a big open field. 1209 01:13:23,111 --> 01:13:25,488 We gotta get across it to get to the boat. 1210 01:13:25,489 --> 01:13:26,948 But we can't just run across. 1211 01:13:26,949 --> 01:13:28,158 It's too exposed. 1212 01:13:28,825 --> 01:13:30,327 The snake could come from anywhere. 1213 01:13:31,703 --> 01:13:33,664 Maybe we can create a distraction. 1214 01:13:34,790 --> 01:13:38,001 Yeah, yeah, maybe, but, I mean, how do we do that? 1215 01:13:39,461 --> 01:13:41,338 I mean, it's gonna be so... What? 1216 01:13:55,519 --> 01:13:56,895 It's here. 1217 01:14:25,799 --> 01:14:26,800 What? 1218 01:14:27,676 --> 01:14:28,759 What? 1219 01:14:28,760 --> 01:14:31,763 Oh, my God. Doug. Doug, no. 1220 01:14:33,265 --> 01:14:34,808 Dougie. Dougie. 1221 01:14:35,309 --> 01:14:37,102 - Come on, man. - Is he... 1222 01:14:38,645 --> 01:14:40,105 Jesus Christ. 1223 01:14:44,902 --> 01:14:46,653 Wait. Wait. 1224 01:14:50,240 --> 01:14:52,868 Maybe Doug is the distraction. 1225 01:14:54,995 --> 01:14:56,078 How? 1226 01:14:56,079 --> 01:14:58,247 I know this is horrible, okay? 1227 01:14:58,248 --> 01:15:01,584 But if we can drag Doug out into the field, 1228 01:15:01,585 --> 01:15:02,961 prop him up 1229 01:15:03,670 --> 01:15:06,590 and attach the boar to his back 1230 01:15:07,132 --> 01:15:10,886 wouldn't we make it really hard for the snake to swallow him? 1231 01:15:11,845 --> 01:15:15,598 It'll occupy the snake long enough for us to get across the field 1232 01:15:15,599 --> 01:15:16,767 and get back to the boat. 1233 01:15:17,851 --> 01:15:19,728 It's a really smart idea. 1234 01:15:24,983 --> 01:15:26,108 Guys, this is horrible. 1235 01:15:26,109 --> 01:15:28,694 If it meant saving all of us, I'm sure Doug would've wanted this. 1236 01:15:28,695 --> 01:15:30,655 I'm not sure he would've wanted this. 1237 01:15:30,656 --> 01:15:31,614 Wait. 1238 01:15:31,615 --> 01:15:33,324 - We gotta go, guys. - What are you gonna do? 1239 01:15:33,325 --> 01:15:34,368 What are you doing? 1240 01:15:36,119 --> 01:15:38,205 Snakes, they love squirrel meat. 1241 01:15:55,430 --> 01:15:57,558 Wait, the snake is right behind him. 1242 01:16:13,240 --> 01:16:14,324 I can't... 1243 01:16:23,584 --> 01:16:24,835 Oh, shit! 1244 01:16:28,964 --> 01:16:31,132 - He's alive! He's alive! - He's alive! 1245 01:16:31,133 --> 01:16:33,134 - I thought you checked his pulse! - I did! 1246 01:16:33,135 --> 01:16:35,219 Well, you did a shitty job! 1247 01:16:35,220 --> 01:16:36,638 What the fuck? 1248 01:16:37,389 --> 01:16:39,932 - Doug! Watch out! Run! - Doug! Run! 1249 01:16:39,933 --> 01:16:41,726 Come on, Doug, run! 1250 01:16:41,727 --> 01:16:44,395 - Hey! - Run! Faster! 1251 01:16:44,396 --> 01:16:45,563 Hey. 1252 01:16:45,564 --> 01:16:47,565 - Doug, run! - Doug! 1253 01:16:47,566 --> 01:16:48,441 What? 1254 01:16:48,442 --> 01:16:50,484 - He's right behind you! - What? 1255 01:16:50,485 --> 01:16:53,322 - Run, Doug! - Doug! 1256 01:16:54,114 --> 01:16:55,323 Oh, shit! 1257 01:16:55,324 --> 01:16:56,742 Shit, shit. 1258 01:16:57,367 --> 01:16:59,912 Shit. Shit, shit, shit. Shit. 1259 01:17:00,704 --> 01:17:01,954 Oh, shit. 1260 01:17:01,955 --> 01:17:03,039 - Run! - Run! 1261 01:17:03,040 --> 01:17:05,041 - Run, Doug! Run! - Run! 1262 01:17:05,042 --> 01:17:06,459 What the hell is on my back? 1263 01:17:06,460 --> 01:17:08,420 It's a long story! Just run! 1264 01:17:15,928 --> 01:17:17,095 Shit! 1265 01:17:21,975 --> 01:17:24,186 God, help me! Jesus! 1266 01:17:26,730 --> 01:17:28,856 Damn it. This thing's alive! 1267 01:17:28,857 --> 01:17:30,359 This thing's alive! 1268 01:17:31,193 --> 01:17:34,028 It's trying to bite me! 1269 01:17:34,029 --> 01:17:35,697 Doug! Run! 1270 01:17:42,371 --> 01:17:44,705 Holy shit! Get back to the boat! 1271 01:17:44,706 --> 01:17:47,500 Get back to the boat! Go! 1272 01:17:47,501 --> 01:17:50,879 - Boat! Go! Go! Go! - It was right behind me! 1273 01:17:55,175 --> 01:17:57,176 - Okay. All right. All right. - Okay. 1274 01:17:57,177 --> 01:17:58,928 I think we're okay. I think we're okay. 1275 01:17:58,929 --> 01:18:00,012 Oh, God. 1276 01:18:00,013 --> 01:18:01,431 All right. All right. We-- 1277 01:18:02,307 --> 01:18:03,975 What the hell! 1278 01:18:03,976 --> 01:18:05,561 I thought I was dead. 1279 01:18:06,895 --> 01:18:08,146 How you doing, Dougie? 1280 01:18:08,981 --> 01:18:10,231 - I'm okay now. - Good. 1281 01:18:10,232 --> 01:18:11,315 I thought we lost you, man. 1282 01:18:11,316 --> 01:18:12,484 Can I say something? 1283 01:18:13,402 --> 01:18:14,778 I'm sorry. 1284 01:18:15,529 --> 01:18:17,989 I think I got so caught up in wanting to play a hero, 1285 01:18:17,990 --> 01:18:21,075 that I lost sight of what it is that's really important to me. 1286 01:18:21,076 --> 01:18:23,412 And that's just making stuff with you guys again. 1287 01:18:24,246 --> 01:18:26,122 Griff, I feel the exact same way. 1288 01:18:26,123 --> 01:18:27,165 I love you guys. 1289 01:18:27,666 --> 01:18:29,084 I just have one question. 1290 01:18:31,545 --> 01:18:34,715 Whose idea was it to put that dead squirrel in my mouth? 1291 01:18:36,425 --> 01:18:38,801 It was like a group decision. It wasn't-- 1292 01:18:38,802 --> 01:18:41,430 - Really? - Yeah, it wasn't like one person. 1293 01:18:42,139 --> 01:18:44,265 Snakes love squirrel meat. 1294 01:18:44,266 --> 01:18:45,725 I knew it was your idea! 1295 01:18:45,726 --> 01:18:47,143 Guys, come on. We gotta keep moving. 1296 01:18:47,144 --> 01:18:49,563 All right, well, I made a choice and I'm sticking with it. 1297 01:19:09,583 --> 01:19:11,376 Holy shit. 1298 01:19:12,628 --> 01:19:14,129 It's the Anaconda set. 1299 01:19:14,713 --> 01:19:17,007 What happened? It's destroyed. 1300 01:19:25,140 --> 01:19:26,141 Hello? 1301 01:19:27,893 --> 01:19:30,062 Is anyone there? Hello? 1302 01:19:32,856 --> 01:19:34,024 Can you help us? 1303 01:19:36,860 --> 01:19:38,654 What? I... 1304 01:19:43,992 --> 01:19:45,702 What? Again, sorry? 1305 01:19:47,788 --> 01:19:49,206 Behind you! 1306 01:20:13,230 --> 01:20:16,148 Holy shit. Ice Cube? 1307 01:20:16,149 --> 01:20:19,570 Who'd you think it was, Jon Voight? Let's go. 1308 01:20:25,909 --> 01:20:27,535 Let's go, let's go, let's go. Now. 1309 01:20:27,536 --> 01:20:29,663 In here. Get in here, tube socks. 1310 01:20:43,510 --> 01:20:44,636 We're good. 1311 01:20:45,345 --> 01:20:47,096 Hey, are you okay? 1312 01:20:47,097 --> 01:20:50,558 Yeah, I'm all right. The snake tore up the set. 1313 01:20:50,559 --> 01:20:53,477 Everybody scattered. Lamp hit me, I'm down. 1314 01:20:53,478 --> 01:20:56,189 I get up, nobody there. 1315 01:20:56,190 --> 01:20:59,233 - What about J.Lo? - Yeah, and Eric Stoltz? 1316 01:20:59,234 --> 01:21:01,194 Jenny from the block, so she gonna be okay, 1317 01:21:01,195 --> 01:21:03,863 but Eric ain't from the block. 1318 01:21:03,864 --> 01:21:05,574 - Jesus. - Damn it. 1319 01:21:06,116 --> 01:21:10,536 I don't know how we're gonna do it, but we have to kill it before it kills us. 1320 01:21:10,537 --> 01:21:12,246 I'm with that, I'm with that. 1321 01:21:12,247 --> 01:21:14,458 Hey, how were they gonna do it in your script? 1322 01:21:15,834 --> 01:21:19,378 I don't know. The writer never finished the third act. 1323 01:21:19,379 --> 01:21:23,007 What? You guys started shooting before you knew the end? 1324 01:21:23,008 --> 01:21:25,426 Welcome to Hollywood, buttercup. 1325 01:21:25,427 --> 01:21:28,721 That's what they do. They just make it up as they go along. 1326 01:21:28,722 --> 01:21:31,849 What was the general gist? Do you have any idea? Was anything-- 1327 01:21:31,850 --> 01:21:35,603 All I know is they were setting up pyrotechnics all through here. 1328 01:21:35,604 --> 01:21:37,021 Is it still up? 1329 01:21:37,022 --> 01:21:39,607 It's hooked up, but I don't know how to work pyro. 1330 01:21:39,608 --> 01:21:43,445 Kenny, you know how to ignite pyro, right? 1331 01:21:43,987 --> 01:21:45,696 - Not a problem, boss. - Hey, hey. 1332 01:21:45,697 --> 01:21:49,200 I don't know what y'all talking about. I gotta go save J.Lo and Stoltz. 1333 01:21:49,201 --> 01:21:50,326 - Okay. - Really? 1334 01:21:50,327 --> 01:21:52,161 - You go. - You're going after them? 1335 01:21:52,162 --> 01:21:55,915 They the homies, okay? I can't leave 'em out here with the ops. 1336 01:21:55,916 --> 01:21:59,378 I got to go and represent. They my castmates. 1337 01:21:59,878 --> 01:22:02,421 Actors code. Respect. 1338 01:22:02,422 --> 01:22:03,423 Yeah, yeah. 1339 01:22:04,550 --> 01:22:06,175 - Can we get a... - Do you mind? 1340 01:22:06,176 --> 01:22:09,012 - We're such fans of everything you do. - Come on, please. 1341 01:22:11,390 --> 01:22:14,559 Man, y'all groupied out. Y'all groupied out. What? Let's go. 1342 01:22:14,560 --> 01:22:17,354 - Yes! - Okay. Everybody get in here. Grin. Okay. 1343 01:22:19,815 --> 01:22:22,316 - Don't post that. - No, no, no. 1344 01:22:22,317 --> 01:22:25,903 Can we get one more for safety? I don't think my face was totally in there. 1345 01:22:25,904 --> 01:22:27,864 - No, it's fine. - It's fine, it's fine. 1346 01:22:27,865 --> 01:22:30,324 - You're gonna need that. - You sure? 1347 01:22:30,325 --> 01:22:31,535 Of course. 1348 01:22:32,077 --> 01:22:33,787 I got another one. 1349 01:22:34,788 --> 01:22:37,416 All right. Keep it gangster. 1350 01:22:43,380 --> 01:22:44,631 Legend. 1351 01:22:45,174 --> 01:22:46,549 You thinking what I'm thinking? 1352 01:22:46,550 --> 01:22:47,551 Oh, yeah. 1353 01:22:49,344 --> 01:22:51,763 - It could work, right? - Hundred percent. 1354 01:22:53,640 --> 01:22:55,600 What are you thinking? 1355 01:22:55,601 --> 01:22:58,811 Just so I'm... Just to make sure that it's exactly what I'm thinking. 1356 01:22:58,812 --> 01:23:00,188 Which I'm sure it is, totally. I mean... 1357 01:23:00,189 --> 01:23:01,690 I'm super sure. 1358 01:23:02,900 --> 01:23:04,442 I'm thinking about killing that snake. 1359 01:23:04,443 --> 01:23:06,820 Now see, that's it, that's what... I was thinking that too. 1360 01:23:08,864 --> 01:23:10,032 Okay, here's the plan. 1361 01:23:10,949 --> 01:23:12,951 Griff, you get the detonator from Kenny. 1362 01:23:14,119 --> 01:23:16,330 Claire, you fire up the generators. 1363 01:23:18,123 --> 01:23:20,167 Kenny, you set up the cameras. 1364 01:23:23,837 --> 01:23:25,671 I'll get the golf cart. 1365 01:23:25,672 --> 01:23:28,257 We'll lure the snake into the pyro field 1366 01:23:28,258 --> 01:23:30,552 and end this thing once and for all. 1367 01:23:32,513 --> 01:23:34,765 You ready for our big Hollywood ending? 1368 01:23:41,688 --> 01:23:42,855 - You ready? - Yeah. 1369 01:23:42,856 --> 01:23:46,359 Kenny said as soon as we get to the pyro field, we can detonate these one by one. 1370 01:23:46,360 --> 01:23:49,696 - Gonna blow this bitch sky-high. - Sky-freaking-high. 1371 01:23:55,911 --> 01:23:57,454 Come get us, asshole! 1372 01:24:04,294 --> 01:24:05,128 Where is he? 1373 01:24:08,215 --> 01:24:09,842 Oh, shit! 1374 01:24:13,470 --> 01:24:16,431 - Oh, shit. Oh, shit! - Oh, shit! 1375 01:24:17,182 --> 01:24:19,892 - Doesn't this go faster? - Well, take off the governor. 1376 01:24:19,893 --> 01:24:21,978 Underneath there. See if you can rip it off. 1377 01:24:21,979 --> 01:24:24,230 - Governor? - The governor! It slows it down. 1378 01:24:24,231 --> 01:24:27,484 - The hell you talking about, governor? - I'm talking about golf cart technology! 1379 01:24:33,949 --> 01:24:36,075 - Where'd it go? - I don't see it. I don't know where it is. 1380 01:24:36,076 --> 01:24:37,244 Keep your head on a swivel. 1381 01:24:38,161 --> 01:24:39,287 I don't see it anywhere. 1382 01:24:39,288 --> 01:24:41,122 - Whoa! - Whoa! 1383 01:24:41,123 --> 01:24:42,082 Oh, my God! 1384 01:24:44,084 --> 01:24:45,126 Oh, shit. 1385 01:24:45,127 --> 01:24:46,794 We lost the signal. 1386 01:24:46,795 --> 01:24:48,504 If we don't get this thing online in time... 1387 01:24:48,505 --> 01:24:49,714 Then we're all dead. 1388 01:24:49,715 --> 01:24:50,966 - Let's go. - Let's go. 1389 01:24:53,927 --> 01:24:55,344 Dude, you're actually a really good driver. 1390 01:24:55,345 --> 01:24:57,139 Thank you. 1391 01:24:59,558 --> 01:25:00,809 Oh, my God! 1392 01:25:05,480 --> 01:25:08,065 Why is there no power? Why is there no power? 1393 01:25:08,066 --> 01:25:10,484 Pyro field dead ahead. It's now or never. 1394 01:25:10,485 --> 01:25:11,569 Armed and ready. 1395 01:25:11,570 --> 01:25:13,112 - No! - All right, look. 1396 01:25:13,113 --> 01:25:15,072 - Look for something like this. - Like this, okay. 1397 01:25:15,073 --> 01:25:16,074 Almost there! 1398 01:25:20,204 --> 01:25:22,955 It's getting closer! It's getting closer! Oh, God! 1399 01:25:22,956 --> 01:25:23,999 Go faster! 1400 01:25:26,084 --> 01:25:28,127 Fuck. Found it! 1401 01:25:28,128 --> 01:25:29,838 - Can I hit it now? - Hold. Hold. 1402 01:25:33,759 --> 01:25:35,092 Now! Hit it now! 1403 01:25:35,093 --> 01:25:37,721 Die, you giant snake bitch! 1404 01:25:40,516 --> 01:25:41,682 - What the-- - What? 1405 01:25:41,683 --> 01:25:44,101 It's not working! It's not working! 1406 01:25:44,102 --> 01:25:46,479 - Hit all of them. - I am! I'm hitting every one of 'em! 1407 01:25:46,480 --> 01:25:48,606 And now we die! Now we die! 1408 01:25:48,607 --> 01:25:49,774 Why didn't it happen? 1409 01:25:49,775 --> 01:25:50,942 - Why isn't it... - I don't know. 1410 01:25:50,943 --> 01:25:51,985 Oh, wait. 1411 01:25:53,654 --> 01:25:54,988 I forgot to turn it on. 1412 01:25:58,534 --> 01:26:00,994 Yes! 1413 01:26:02,704 --> 01:26:05,164 - Yes! Yes. Yes. - Yes! Yes! 1414 01:26:05,165 --> 01:26:06,583 Yeah! 1415 01:26:21,348 --> 01:26:22,266 Yeah! 1416 01:26:23,559 --> 01:26:24,935 Did we kill it? 1417 01:26:26,353 --> 01:26:28,689 - No! - Why? 1418 01:26:30,649 --> 01:26:31,983 Come on. The cart's stuck. 1419 01:26:31,984 --> 01:26:33,401 Oh, shit. 1420 01:26:33,402 --> 01:26:34,987 - Go! - Go, go, go. 1421 01:26:39,575 --> 01:26:41,535 - It's a dead end. - Oh, my God. 1422 01:26:46,665 --> 01:26:47,666 Shit. 1423 01:26:55,465 --> 01:26:56,842 We're all gonna die. 1424 01:27:37,966 --> 01:27:39,885 Not on my watch, mister. 1425 01:27:53,524 --> 01:27:55,067 - Oh, man. - Gross. 1426 01:28:05,744 --> 01:28:06,787 Griff, no! 1427 01:28:22,469 --> 01:28:24,429 And that's a wrap on snake. 1428 01:29:14,021 --> 01:29:16,064 - Thank you very much. - Thank you. 1429 01:29:22,362 --> 01:29:25,532 A long time ago, a group of artists had a vision 1430 01:29:26,408 --> 01:29:30,328 to one day live their dream of making a major motion picture. 1431 01:29:30,329 --> 01:29:36,210 And last year, against all odds, I'm proud to say that dream was realized. 1432 01:29:40,339 --> 01:29:42,006 As my friend Kenny likes to say, 1433 01:29:42,007 --> 01:29:46,135 the snake is a metaphor for the monsters that come for all of us 1434 01:29:46,136 --> 01:29:47,929 if our dreams remain unrealized. 1435 01:29:47,930 --> 01:29:51,183 And to be clear, there's also a non-metaphor snake. 1436 01:29:52,601 --> 01:29:53,726 Oh, my God! 1437 01:29:53,727 --> 01:29:58,398 Quick shoutout to Claire Simons and Kenny Trent! 1438 01:29:59,399 --> 01:30:01,568 Better luck next time! 1439 01:30:05,030 --> 01:30:06,989 While we may not have the rights... 1440 01:30:06,990 --> 01:30:08,658 We don't have... We definitely don't have the rights. 1441 01:30:08,659 --> 01:30:11,328 This is our completely unauthorized, 1442 01:30:12,579 --> 01:30:18,168 possibly illegal reboot of the Sony classic film... 1443 01:30:20,712 --> 01:30:24,550 - Ladies and gentlemen, The Anaconda! - The Anaconda! 1444 01:31:42,544 --> 01:31:44,378 Are you Doug McCallister? 1445 01:31:44,379 --> 01:31:45,380 Uh-huh. 1446 01:31:45,964 --> 01:31:48,591 You directed the unauthorized version of Anaconda 1447 01:31:48,592 --> 01:31:50,177 even though you didn't have the rights? 1448 01:31:51,303 --> 01:31:52,262 Yeah. 1449 01:31:52,763 --> 01:31:54,056 I saw your little movie. 1450 01:31:57,017 --> 01:31:59,436 And I loved it. I loved it. 1451 01:31:59,937 --> 01:32:04,024 That's why I'm here. I'm here because we're doing another Anaconda, 1452 01:32:04,525 --> 01:32:06,401 and I want you to direct it. 1453 01:32:07,653 --> 01:32:08,820 Are you in? 1454 01:33:54,801 --> 01:33:55,886 Guys? 1455 01:34:00,057 --> 01:34:01,225 Griff? 1456 01:34:10,192 --> 01:34:12,402 I'm alive!