* You could do it solo *
* But then you'd be All by yourself *
* Yo! So it'd be more fun To share this one *
* With someone else *
* Together we will soar Across the sky and beyond *
* So turn up your voice *
* Stand up and sing along! *
* All different voices *
* Everybody now! *
* Our melodies ringing *
* We're livin' in harmony *
* Yeah We're livin' in harmony *
* Our song is much stronger With every Troll singing *
* We're livin' in harmony **
*
(humming)
(Poppy) Oh! How gorgeous!
(vase cracks)
(gasp)
Uh...
I didn't.
(vase cracks)
Huh!
What is going on?
*
-Synth? -(Synth) Poppy!
Thank my thumping EDM, I'm glad you're here!
Minuet won't stop practicing,
she's straight up not slept for three days!
(Poppy) Three days?
Straight up?
(Synth) Straight up!
And as you can see...
(troll) Outrageous! I never...
(Synth) Things are not good, yo!
(Poppy) Uh, Minuet?
(Minuet) Poppy! Synth! Welcome!
Apologies for not greeting you properly,
but I must prepare for a very important audition...
Fortissimo!
You see, Dante is forming an elite musical ensemble
to perform my favorite composition:
The Cupcake Concerto.
Sforzando!
Unfortunately, the Cupcake Concerto
is notoriously difficult.
Which is why I'm playing it over and over.
After all, the only way to get better is to practice!
Allegrissimo, decrescendo, cadenza, mezzo forte!
(Synth) Uh, I dunno, Mini-Min,
all this practice sure is breaking a lotta glass...
among other things.
(Poppy) Synth's right, Minuet.
I mean, practice is great, but at a certain point
you need rest, to renew your energy,
brighten your spirits, and give you fresh perspective.
(Minuet) I'm sorry, rest? Now?
(chuckle)
No, no, no, not until I can execute the piece flawlessly!
Besides, I'm not the teast lot blired.
(both) Huh?
(Minuet) Oh, silly me, I meant, lot the niste tile blursted.
Lel da bleast flit blaaa...
I'm not the least bit tired!
-(Poppy) But... -(Minuet) Okay, I think we can agree
I've addressed all your concerns!
This has been lovely! Off you go!
(Poppy) Okay, clearly she's exhausted.
She has to rest.
(Synth) For real!
We gotta get her to stop playing that violin like now, yo.
'Cuz this is bad.
(grunt)
(Poppy) Okay, Minuet will stop practicing
if we distract her
with a performance from the cutest,
most talented person in all of TrollsTopia.
(Synth) Aw, Poppy, you flatter me.
(Poppy) Perky!
(Synth) Oh, you meant your pet
'cuz you think of your pet as a person...
that's cool.
(chuckle)
(Poppy) Okay, Perky, maximum adorability.
Mhmm. Make it so.
(Synth) Aww!
(Minuet) Huh?
(gasp)
Oh! Perky?
I had no idea you were so talented!
There's no way I can resist!
I must play with you this instant!
(laughing)
(both) Yeah!
Huh?
(gasp)
(Minuet) Uh huh. Elbow up. That's it!
(Synth) She really is talented.
(Poppy) I know.
(violin playing)
(Demo) Woe! Woe is me!
Shall no one assist me in my hour of need?
(Minuet) Demo? Did you say you need help?
(Demo) Indeed!
For I must move this couch to Rock Hollow,
but I am powerless to carry it alone!
If only there was just one Troll
who could drop everything they're doing and help!
-(troll 1) I'll do it! -(troll 2) Count me in!
(troll 3) I love helping people move!
(Demo) Just one troll!
(trolls) Aww!
(Demo) Who will lend me their hand?
(Minuet) Oh, Demo!
I would, but I'm practicing for an audition.
Then again, what kind of Troll would I be
if I don't assist a friend in need?
Oh!
(violin stops)
(gasp)
(both) Yeah!
(violin playing)
(both) Huh?
(Minuet) There! Now, where exactly do you want this?
(Demo) Uh...
*
(Minuet) Gah!
(Poppy) Oh, she's this close to falling asleep.
She just needs a little nudge and it's nighty-night.
(Synth) That's why we're gonna throw down this warm milk,
these sleepy sleep candles,
and a woobie with which to snuggle...
(chuckling)
* Close those eyes *
* You're so tired *
* Drift off to this lullaby *
* Why stay up *
* When you could *
* Settle down Just like you should *
* You're getting sleepy *
* Oh, your eyes are heavy *
* Don't you wanna lie down? *
* Sleep now *
* Close those eyes *
* Tune it out *
* Sleep now *
* Just relax *
* Settle down **
(gasp)
(both) Yeah!
Yeah...
(Synth) Aw, look at her there.
All snuggled up.
Her little spiky hair
sticking out the top of the blanket.
(Poppy) Yeah.
(both) Spiky hair?
(gasp)
(Minuet) I knew it!
You two are trying to make me take a break!
Well, you won't succeed. I will never stop practicing!
Never!
(gasp)
(screaming)
(laugh)
(grunt)
(groaning)
(Synth) Minuet, we're just trying to help!
(Poppy clears throat)
(Poppy) I can hear you playing violin.
(chuckle)
(Synth) Ha!
(groaning)
(gasping)
(actor) Yea, dost thou say?
Then I doth say nay!
Nay doth I say!
(Minuet) Dah!
(Poppy) Stop right there, Minuet!
You've got to take a break!
(Minuet) I told you!
I shall never stop practicing!
Never!
(gasp)
(troll 1) Oh, my, this certainly took
an interesting turn!
(troll 2) I had no idea Minuet was even in this production.
(Synth) C'mon, Minuet.
Just put the violin down and get some rest!
(Minuet) I can't do that!
(Poppy) But we only want what's best for you!
(Minuet) What's best for me is to prepare for the audition!
(Poppy) Resting is preparing for the audition!
(Minuet) No, it isn't!
(Poppy) Why not?
(Minuet) I told you!
Because practice is the only way to get better!
(Poppy) Well, are you getting better?
(Minuet) No!
(audience gasps)
(troll 2) Oh, my!
(Holly) Hot dang, are y'all's plays always this good?
(Minuet) No.
If I'm being honest, I...
I'm not getting better.
I'm so tired.
It's been some time since I've made progress at all.
(Poppy) Well, then what do you have to lose
by giving us the violin and giving yourself a break?
(cheering)
(troll 1) Bravo!
(troll 2) Encore! Encore!
(Holly) I'm so confused, y'all, but I love it!
(snoring)
(Poppy) Let's take her home.
(snoring)
*
(Dante) Mmm, very good indeed.
Thank you.
Will anyone else be putting forward an audition?
(Copper) Yup!
(accordion playing)
(Dante) Will anyone else be putting forward
a serious audition?
(Copper) Nope!
(laugh)
(Dante) Hmm, I'm actually quite surprised
we haven't heard from Minuet.
(Poppy) She'll be here.
She's just taking a much needed break.
(Dante) Well, I'm afraid I must make my selections today,
so how certain are you that she will...
(Minuet) I'm here!
I just woke up 30 seconds ago but I'm here!
(gasp)
(Synth) We're pretty certain, yo.
*
(Dante) Heavens!
Minuet, this is the finest I have ever heard you play!
(Minuet) Thank you!
I owe it all to practice.
And a bit of rest.
(Dante) Well, I have heard enough!
Brava, Minuet, and welcome to our ensemble!
You shall be second chair violin.
(Minuet) Wait, second chair? Who is first?
*
(Dante) She's just so talented.
(all) We know!
(Holly) Hot dang!
Are y'all's auditions always this good?
*
(howling)
(gasping)
(Poppy) Guy, I'm happy to give you feedback
on your big speech, but do we really have
to rehearse this late at night, this deep in the woods?
(Tiny Diamond) Do we have to? You are hi-larious, Auntie P!
Oh, man!
(laugh)
(Guy Diamond) Tiny's right to laugh.
After all, when you're in the "public Guy"
as much as yours truly,
the only way to prevent spoilers from leaking
is to take a few extra precautions.
Watch your heads!
You see, this isn't just any speech.
I'm the keynote speaker
at this year's big Glitter Troll Convention, GlitterCon!
Down we go!
(scream)
There! The perfect rehearsal space!
It offers complete privacy, incredible acoustics,
a colony of giant bats, and plenty of...
Wait!
(scream)
-(Tiny Diamond) Daddy! -(Poppy) Guy, are you okay?
(Guy Diamond) Poppy, please.
There isn't much time, promise me something.
(Poppy) Of course, Guy, anything.
(Guy Diamond) Promise me...
you'll sign a nondisclosure agreement
not to share my speech with anyone.
(Poppy) Uh, okay.
(Guy Diamond) Great!
Ladies and glittermen,
the dictionary defines glitter as the modules
of sparkly goodness that comes from the behind
of every glitter troll...
(groaning)
(Tiny Diamond) Daddy! Daddy, wake up!
Wake up!
(horn)
(Guy Diamond) Tiny?
Oh, my, I had that classic Glitter Troll nightmare,
where you're out in public and you're horrified to realize
you're wearing clothes...
(scream)
(Tiny Diamond) Daddy! You're a glitter troll!
-Why are you wearing clothes? -(Guy Diamond) I don't know!
I must've put them on in my sleep!
(Tiny Diamond) Well, take it off, Daddy! Take it off!
(scream)
(groaning)
(Guy Diamond) There! Don't worry, Tiny,
things are back under control...
(screaming)
(Tiny Diamond) You're still wearing 'em, Daddy!
(Guy Diamond) What is happening to me?
(Laguna) I can answer that question!
(Guy Diamond) Huh?
Laguna?
(Laguna) Yes, Poppy told me
about your encounter with the bats.
And I'm afraid their bite has given you
a supernatural craving to wear clothes.
You are becoming a glam-pire!
(gasp)
(both) A glam-pire?
(Laguna) One night, here in the library,
I stumbled upon these ancient tomes.
Researching them has made me what I am today,
a glampire hunter.
(gasp)
Bleh, no, helper.
I'm a glampire helper, slip of the tongue.
Heh.
(both) Oh, okay, cool.
(Tiny Diamond) Please, Daddy's Friend!
There must be a cure for my daddy's glampirism!
(Guy Diamond) I've got Glitter Con in two days!
My entire speech is about
what it means to be a Glitter Troll.
Who would ever take me seriously if I show up dressed?
(Laguna) Well, we can try a few things.
But I will need your full commitment.
(Guy Diamond) Then you shall have it!
By the shine of my glitter, I swear,
the only clothes I'll be wearing to Glitter Con
is my birthday suit!
(Laguna) Then let's get to work!
(Guy Diamond) Great. I'll grab a coat.
Ah!
(Laguna) This empty pod is 100% clothing-free.
If you can stay in here for an entire day
without wearing anything,
your glam-pirism may reverse itself!
(Guy Diamond) Great! I can catch up on some reading.
It's my auto-Guy-ography.
(laugh)
Oh, what wit!
(laugh)
(Tiny Diamond) Daddy did it!
An entire day without wearing any...
(gasp)
Daddy?
(gasp)
(Guy Diamond) What have I become?
Don't look at me!
(crying)
(Laguna) And the final ingredient.
One spray of this
just might break the Glampire's curse.
(sigh)
(Guy Diamond) Finally! Things can go back to normal.
Although, this peak lapel does make me look dashing.
(Laguna) Guy? It's time.
(Guy Diamond) I said this peak lapel makes me look dashing!
-(Tiny Diamond) Daddy, what are you saying? -(Guy Diamond) I'm saying
I don't want to go back to before.
This is who I am now!
(laughing)
*
* Come on *
* My heart's saying no but... *
* My legs wanna jump in *
* That smooth Polyester *
* I just need it on my skin *
* I don't want it *
* But I need it *
* My mind is spinning 'round *
* My world is upside down *
* I'm haunted By the fashion spirit *
* So maybe just this once *
* I might just put it on **
(Guy Diamond) I thirst...
for breathable cotton!
Elegant yet relaxed!
Perfect for the Troll who's just as comfortable
in the ballroom as he is in the ball pit.
(laugh)
(Laguna) Now, Tiny!
(screaming)
(groaning)
(Laguna) Guy?
(Guy Diamond) Must resist the change!
(groaning)
(Tiny Diamond) Uh, Daddy, you okay?
(groaning)
(Guy Diamond) I'm fine! That definitely worked.
Just let me have my moment, eh, son?
(scream)
The metamorphosis is at hand.
*
Ah, Glitter Con, the sparkliest event of the year!
And I mean that glitterally.
(laughing)
(Tiny Diamond) Razor sharp witticism, Daddy!
(laugh)
(Guy Diamond) No, but seriously.
I want to thank you for not giving up on me.
Thanks to you, I can share my speech
with all the glitter Trolls without causing a scandal.
Tiny, Laguna? What's wrong?
(Tiny Diamond) Daddy...
(Laguna) Your napkin...
(Guy Diamond) Huh?
(gasp)
The formula is wearing off!
-The thirst is coming back! -(Tiny Diamond) You mean
you're reverting back into your glam-pire form?
Daddy's friend, what's up with that?
(Laguna) I don't know.
Maybe we didn't use enough of the formula.
(woman) And now, please welcome
tonight's keynote speaker to the stage.
It's Guy Diamond!
(cheering)
(troll) We love you!
(chuckle)
(Tiny Diamond) No! If daddy gives into his craving now,
he'll be exposed naked for all the glitter trolls to see,
y'know, by being clothed!
(Laguna) Maybe I can go get the rest of the formula
and give Guy a stronger dose before it's too late.
(Tiny Diamond) But, but, but...
(gasp)
(trolls cheering)
(Flower Guy) Come, Guy!
(stammering)
(Cake Guy) Show them who we are.
(laughing)
(stammering)
(Guy Diamond) Ladies and glittermen,
the dictionary defines glitter as...
as...
Ah! I can't take it!
I must dress!
(groaning)
(gasp)
Look away!
I'm a fashionable monster!
(applause)
(cheering)
You don't care?
You accept me in this stunning ensemble?
(troll 1) Of course!
(troll 2) Why wouldn't we?
(troll 3) It really makes your eyes pop!
(audience chattering)
(Guy Diamond) Friends, I thought I knew
what it meant to be a Glitter Troll.
But seeing how you've embraced me,
I can see I was all wrong.
Being a Glitter Troll isn't about
strutting around clothes-free,
our toots glistening majestically in the sun.
For whether your preference is to wear clothes or not,
it is a genuine love of self that always shines through.
(crowd cheering)
(Laguna screaming)
(scream)
(audience gasps)
(Tiny Diamond) Did it work, Daddy?
Did the formula break the Glampire's curse?
(Guy Diamond) Actually, Tiny,
I don't think there ever was a curse.
I think I've just been discovering
a side of myself I've never seen before.
(Tiny Diamond) Wait a minute, so you're saying?
(Guy Diamond) I'm saying I'm here, world!
Dressed head to toe!
Take me as I am!
(crowd cheering)
* That smooth Polyester *
* I just need it on my skin *
* I don't want it *
* But I need it *
* My mind is spinning 'round *
* My world is upside down *
* I'm haunted By the fashion spirit *
* So maybe just this once *
* I might just put it on **