1
00:00:04,713 --> 00:00:05,088
.
2
00:00:05,130 --> 00:00:05,672
[indistinct chatter]
3
00:00:07,257 --> 00:00:09,634
- Okay, everybody, everybody?
Um, quick heads-up.
4
00:00:09,676 --> 00:00:11,761
I presume some of you may have
heard some of these accusations
5
00:00:11,803 --> 00:00:13,847
that have been flying around
about defective pawls
6
00:00:13,888 --> 00:00:15,181
and a cover-up, et cetera.
7
00:00:15,223 --> 00:00:17,434
Well, if there is
an investigation,
8
00:00:17,475 --> 00:00:20,645
we may receive a "preservation
of evidence" order.
9
00:00:20,687 --> 00:00:24,107
That makes it illegal for you
to destroy any documents, okay?
10
00:00:24,149 --> 00:00:27,235
Second heads-up: we actually
haven't received one yet, okay?
11
00:00:27,277 --> 00:00:29,112
So, um, you know,
at this moment in time,
12
00:00:29,154 --> 00:00:33,116
the destruction of documents
is not presently a crime, so...
13
00:00:35,076 --> 00:00:36,536
Our stock's already down 20%.
14
00:00:36,578 --> 00:00:37,954
This is the worst day
of my life.
15
00:00:37,996 --> 00:00:39,789
- Yeah, a lot of people
are hurting right now.
16
00:00:39,831 --> 00:00:41,458
- Yeah, but I'm being hurt
the most, you know,
17
00:00:41,499 --> 00:00:43,918
- 'cause I own the most stock.
- Huge discovery this morning:
18
00:00:43,960 --> 00:00:46,338
- McDonald's sells bagels.
- Hmm.
19
00:00:46,379 --> 00:00:47,505
How you guys holding up?
20
00:00:47,547 --> 00:00:49,090
- I may have to get rid
of Rosalita.
21
00:00:49,132 --> 00:00:50,633
- Your housekeeper?
- What? No.
22
00:00:50,675 --> 00:00:53,011
Mayra's my housekeeper, and
sometimes her daughter helps.
23
00:00:53,053 --> 00:00:54,220
Rosalita's my catamaran.
24
00:00:54,262 --> 00:00:55,805
She's a 42-foot Crowther,
25
00:00:55,847 --> 00:00:58,099
and now I don't know
if I can afford to keep her.
26
00:00:58,141 --> 00:01:00,894
- Wow.
- Yes, not fair, exactly.
27
00:01:00,935 --> 00:01:02,187
If you have deleted
28
00:01:02,228 --> 00:01:03,980
any sensitive files
off your computer,
29
00:01:04,022 --> 00:01:06,816
don't worry: the authorities
will be able to retrieve them,
30
00:01:06,858 --> 00:01:08,860
you know, unless you happen
to run your hard drive
31
00:01:08,902 --> 00:01:10,945
through an industrial-grade
degausser...
32
00:01:10,987 --> 00:01:12,572
[chuckles]
Like the one located
33
00:01:12,614 --> 00:01:14,407
in room 261
of the IT department.
34
00:01:14,449 --> 00:01:15,742
Now, some of you
may be wondering,
35
00:01:15,784 --> 00:01:17,911
"Elliot, what's
with the power drill?"
36
00:01:17,952 --> 00:01:19,704
[drill whirring]
37
00:01:19,746 --> 00:01:21,915
- * Bom bom
bom-bom-bom-bom-bom *
38
00:01:21,956 --> 00:01:24,876
* Buh buh bom-bom-bom
buh bom-bom-bom-bom *
39
00:01:24,918 --> 00:01:27,712
[chorus vocalizing]
40
00:01:27,754 --> 00:01:30,423
{\an8}- All right,
for the next couple of days,
41
00:01:30,465 --> 00:01:32,425
{\an8}or as long
as this little crisis lasts,
42
00:01:32,467 --> 00:01:35,428
{\an8}this is officially our...
43
00:01:35,470 --> 00:01:37,180
{\an8}- Wah-room?
- What?
44
00:01:37,222 --> 00:01:39,182
{\an8}No, war room.
45
00:01:39,224 --> 00:01:40,350
{\an8}- It does look like wah-room.
46
00:01:40,392 --> 00:01:41,559
{\an8}- Yeah.
- You want me to rewrite it?
47
00:01:41,601 --> 00:01:42,560
{\an8}- Everyone knows what it says,
all right?
48
00:01:42,602 --> 00:01:43,728
{\an8}Will you just put it up,
please?
49
00:01:43,770 --> 00:01:44,813
{\an8}- You want me to take it
to the print shop?
50
00:01:44,854 --> 00:01:46,022
{\an8}I can make it look
more professional.
51
00:01:46,064 --> 00:01:47,399
{\an8}Eh, don't bother.
52
00:01:47,440 --> 00:01:48,733
{\an8}By the time they finish,
this thing will all be over.
53
00:01:48,775 --> 00:01:50,151
{\an8}- Oh, everyone's
met Ian, right?
54
00:01:50,193 --> 00:01:51,945
{\an8}He's the best crisis manager
out there.
55
00:01:51,986 --> 00:01:54,322
{\an8}He got us through a lot
of thorny stuff at York,
56
00:01:54,364 --> 00:01:56,783
{\an8}- and he has also worked with--
- Eh, bah-bah-bah.
57
00:01:56,825 --> 00:01:58,326
{\an8}We don't talk
about other clients,
58
00:01:58,368 --> 00:02:00,370
{\an8}but let's just say
I am his top gun,
59
00:02:00,412 --> 00:02:04,249
{\an8}and to make him seem normal
is a mission impossible.
60
00:02:04,290 --> 00:02:06,251
{\an8}- All right, so we are
in very good hands.
61
00:02:06,292 --> 00:02:07,460
{\an8}All right, my SEO guys
62
00:02:07,502 --> 00:02:08,628
{\an8}are working to choke
this story out.
63
00:02:08,670 --> 00:02:10,463
{\an8}When you Google
"Payne scandal,"
64
00:02:10,505 --> 00:02:12,799
{\an8}all you're gonna get
is 15 articles on Wesley
65
00:02:12,841 --> 00:02:14,592
{\an8}going to a college
Halloween party
66
00:02:14,634 --> 00:02:15,885
{\an8}- dressed as Whoopi Goldberg.
- Oh...
67
00:02:15,927 --> 00:02:18,722
{\an8}- It wasn't Whoopi.
I was a Rasta guy.
68
00:02:18,763 --> 00:02:20,473
{\an8}- All right, where are we
with the bad pawls?
69
00:02:20,515 --> 00:02:22,100
- That's some good news.
- Mm.
70
00:02:22,142 --> 00:02:23,393
{\an8}- We stress-tested them,
71
00:02:23,435 --> 00:02:24,853
{\an8}and even though they weren't
technically rated
72
00:02:24,894 --> 00:02:27,605
{\an8}for the weight of the Hydra,
they were able to hold it.
73
00:02:27,647 --> 00:02:29,149
{\an8}- I went on the NHTSA database,
all right?
74
00:02:29,190 --> 00:02:30,650
{\an8}Prior to the interview airing,
75
00:02:30,692 --> 00:02:32,652
{\an8}the number of complaints about
Hydras rolling out of park
76
00:02:32,694 --> 00:02:34,529
{\an8}- was in line with any other car.
- Okay, score one.
77
00:02:34,571 --> 00:02:36,656
{\an8}- Just because nothing terrible
has happened yet
78
00:02:36,698 --> 00:02:38,074
{\an8}doesn't mean it's not going to.
79
00:02:38,116 --> 00:02:39,659
{\an8}I think we should still do
the recall, to be safe.
80
00:02:39,701 --> 00:02:41,369
- I agree.
We should get ahead of this.
81
00:02:41,411 --> 00:02:43,997
- Shocker--Jack and Sadie
are on the same side.
82
00:02:44,039 --> 00:02:45,498
It's like, "Have sex already."
83
00:02:45,540 --> 00:02:47,334
I mean,
you already did have sex,
84
00:02:47,375 --> 00:02:48,793
so it's like,
"Do it again already,"
85
00:02:48,835 --> 00:02:50,837
in front of us or something--
could you imagine?
86
00:02:50,879 --> 00:02:52,547
- Here's my card
for when you need it.
87
00:02:52,589 --> 00:02:54,424
- It's gonna look shady if I go
to the press and I say,
88
00:02:54,466 --> 00:02:55,759
"Oh, the pawls totally work.
89
00:02:55,800 --> 00:02:57,719
Oh, but, also,
we're doing a recall."
90
00:02:57,761 --> 00:02:59,846
- Yeah, you shouldn't be
talking to the press at all.
91
00:02:59,888 --> 00:03:02,349
Anyone we throw out there
right now would be savaged.
92
00:03:02,390 --> 00:03:03,975
- Oh, yeah,
like one of those videos
93
00:03:04,017 --> 00:03:07,354
where you see, like,
a bear tear a person apart.
94
00:03:07,395 --> 00:03:09,522
Uh, it's normally in Russia,
so don't worry.
95
00:03:09,564 --> 00:03:10,899
- Oh.
- All right, if somebody's
96
00:03:10,940 --> 00:03:12,817
gonna jump on the grenade,
it should be me.
97
00:03:12,859 --> 00:03:14,527
- Great, 'cause I was gonna say
that I could do it, but--
98
00:03:14,569 --> 00:03:15,820
- Fine.
Sadie'll talk to the press.
99
00:03:15,862 --> 00:03:17,030
- You said you'd--
100
00:03:17,072 --> 00:03:18,156
Yeah, I'll do it.
101
00:03:18,198 --> 00:03:19,574
- Love to. Happy to.
- Okay, perfect.
102
00:03:19,616 --> 00:03:20,909
I know this is stressful,
103
00:03:20,950 --> 00:03:23,536
but if there is one thing
that I know about myself,
104
00:03:23,578 --> 00:03:25,205
- it is that I don't lose.
- Mm-hmm.
105
00:03:25,246 --> 00:03:26,539
We will get through this.
106
00:03:26,581 --> 00:03:27,874
[bear growls,
person screaming on phone]
107
00:03:27,916 --> 00:03:30,543
- Oh, [bleep].
Jesus, that's awful.
108
00:03:30,585 --> 00:03:32,253
Oh, it's just
how I imagined it.
109
00:03:34,798 --> 00:03:37,008
- Second breakfast?
- Third.
110
00:03:37,050 --> 00:03:38,510
I eat when I'm stressed.
111
00:03:38,551 --> 00:03:40,679
I was up all night Googling
corporate scandals.
112
00:03:40,720 --> 00:03:42,722
- People go to jail.
- [chuckles]
113
00:03:42,764 --> 00:03:44,891
This isn't some giant
pyramid scheme, all right?
114
00:03:44,933 --> 00:03:47,102
We--we put a wonky part
in a few mid-range crossovers
115
00:03:47,143 --> 00:03:48,478
and got called out for it.
116
00:03:48,520 --> 00:03:50,021
- So you're not worried
they'll need a fall guy
117
00:03:50,063 --> 00:03:51,398
and it could be one of us?
118
00:03:51,439 --> 00:03:52,857
Well, it's not gonna be me.
119
00:03:52,899 --> 00:03:54,693
Anytime I find myself
in a legally dubious situation,
120
00:03:54,734 --> 00:03:56,611
I write myself
a contemporaneous memo.
121
00:03:56,653 --> 00:03:59,280
So I have one dated from that
night saved on my computer
122
00:03:59,322 --> 00:04:01,282
saying that I advocated
for a recall.
123
00:04:01,324 --> 00:04:03,118
- But you said
we shouldn't do a recall.
124
00:04:03,159 --> 00:04:05,412
- [chuckling]
Oh, Cyrus.
125
00:04:05,453 --> 00:04:07,747
That's not how my memo
remembers it.
126
00:04:07,789 --> 00:04:09,332
Ta-ta.
127
00:04:09,374 --> 00:04:10,917
Ugh. I hate this.
128
00:04:10,959 --> 00:04:12,669
- Why'd you volunteer
if you didn't want to do it?
129
00:04:12,711 --> 00:04:14,671
- I was trying to look good
in front of Katherine.
130
00:04:14,713 --> 00:04:16,798
I mean, it's like offering
to split the check on a date.
131
00:04:16,840 --> 00:04:18,633
You don't think they're gonna
take you up on that.
132
00:04:18,675 --> 00:04:20,552
- Uh, I let the lady pay
for the whole thing.
133
00:04:20,593 --> 00:04:21,761
It shows that I'm worth it.
134
00:04:21,803 --> 00:04:23,638
- Knock, knock.
Ready to face the mob?
135
00:04:23,680 --> 00:04:25,682
- Yes, just going over
my statement here.
136
00:04:25,724 --> 00:04:28,852
- Great.
Let me take a look here.
137
00:04:28,893 --> 00:04:30,353
No.
138
00:04:30,395 --> 00:04:32,272
Nope. Uh-uh.
139
00:04:32,313 --> 00:04:34,649
Huh-uh. Huh-uh.
140
00:04:34,691 --> 00:04:35,900
Uh-uh.
141
00:04:35,942 --> 00:04:36,735
All right.
142
00:04:36,776 --> 00:04:38,403
There you go.
Godspeed.
143
00:04:38,445 --> 00:04:40,113
- Ian, you kind of crossed out
a lot here.
144
00:04:40,155 --> 00:04:41,573
I'm sorry, Sadie.
145
00:04:41,614 --> 00:04:42,741
How many companies
have you saved from bankruptcy?
146
00:04:42,782 --> 00:04:44,743
Um, to my knowledge, zero.
147
00:04:44,784 --> 00:04:46,411
- And I'm assuming most
of the press conferences you do
148
00:04:46,453 --> 00:04:47,620
are cutesy fun things,
149
00:04:47,662 --> 00:04:49,164
like factory openings,
charity events,
150
00:04:49,205 --> 00:04:50,999
where wheelchair kids
get to meet John Cena.
151
00:04:51,041 --> 00:04:52,792
- We don't call them
"wheelchair kids."
152
00:04:52,834 --> 00:04:54,002
- Fine, but you're
in my world now,
153
00:04:54,044 --> 00:04:54,961
where the more you say,
154
00:04:55,003 --> 00:04:56,087
the more they can attack.
155
00:04:56,129 --> 00:04:58,214
So you say nothing
and admit even less.
156
00:04:58,256 --> 00:04:59,382
Got it?
157
00:05:01,634 --> 00:05:03,803
We just call them kids.
158
00:05:03,845 --> 00:05:05,513
- See, I wrote the memo
months ago.
159
00:05:05,555 --> 00:05:07,682
It was about how I wanted
to recall the Hydra,
160
00:05:07,724 --> 00:05:10,101
but for some reason,
it says I wrote it today,
161
00:05:10,143 --> 00:05:12,937
and I need it to say
I wrote it back then.
162
00:05:12,979 --> 00:05:14,856
So you want me
163
00:05:14,898 --> 00:05:17,400
to violate the fundamental
rules of space-time?
164
00:05:17,442 --> 00:05:19,611
- [laughing]
That's a good one.
165
00:05:19,652 --> 00:05:20,945
No, I just need you
166
00:05:20,987 --> 00:05:23,990
to make it look
like it was written back then,
167
00:05:24,032 --> 00:05:26,493
contemporaneously.
168
00:05:26,534 --> 00:05:28,453
- Oh. Mm.
- Oh, uh-huh?
169
00:05:28,495 --> 00:05:29,662
- Got it.
- Mm-hmm.
170
00:05:29,704 --> 00:05:31,456
- You want me
to alter the metadata
171
00:05:31,498 --> 00:05:32,832
to help you commit fraud.
172
00:05:32,874 --> 00:05:35,460
- This has been fun, Chloe.
You're fun.
173
00:05:35,502 --> 00:05:37,671
You can go now.
174
00:05:37,712 --> 00:05:39,047
- Sadie,
did Katherine Hastings know
175
00:05:39,089 --> 00:05:41,257
the cars contained
defective locking pawls?
176
00:05:41,299 --> 00:05:44,010
- Well, Nate, that assumes
that the pawls were defective,
177
00:05:44,052 --> 00:05:45,387
which we're not saying.
178
00:05:45,428 --> 00:05:47,138
[chuckles] It also implies
that the Hydra's a car,
179
00:05:47,180 --> 00:05:50,058
when, actually
it's a light SUV, so...
180
00:05:50,100 --> 00:05:51,142
Andrea.
181
00:05:51,184 --> 00:05:52,394
Uh, yes, there are currently
182
00:05:52,435 --> 00:05:54,521
more than one million Hydras
on the road.
183
00:05:54,562 --> 00:05:55,855
Oof, according to you.
184
00:05:55,897 --> 00:05:58,024
- No, according
to your website.
185
00:05:58,066 --> 00:05:59,651
- Well, I don't make
the website.
186
00:05:59,693 --> 00:06:01,444
[chuckling] Or do I?
187
00:06:01,486 --> 00:06:03,738
No definitive answer on that.
188
00:06:03,780 --> 00:06:05,490
[coughing]
Excuse me.
189
00:06:05,532 --> 00:06:07,075
Are you hot?
190
00:06:07,117 --> 00:06:08,535
Mmm, mmm!
191
00:06:08,576 --> 00:06:10,370
I don't drink enough water...
192
00:06:10,412 --> 00:06:11,913
just in my--
[burps] sorry--day.
193
00:06:11,955 --> 00:06:13,832
- How would you say
this is going?
194
00:06:13,873 --> 00:06:16,376
- The flop sweats don't really
help her credibility.
195
00:06:16,418 --> 00:06:17,544
It's super unattractive.
196
00:06:17,585 --> 00:06:19,546
Guys, there's no story here.
197
00:06:19,587 --> 00:06:21,589
A story
is when something happens,
198
00:06:21,631 --> 00:06:24,634
and, literally,
nothing has happened.
199
00:06:24,676 --> 00:06:26,469
- Man, it's beautiful
up here, huh?
200
00:06:26,511 --> 00:06:27,846
Look at that view.
201
00:06:29,597 --> 00:06:30,682
- The car's rolling!
- What?
202
00:06:30,724 --> 00:06:32,017
- The car's rolling!
- Oh, my God!
203
00:06:32,058 --> 00:06:33,393
It's gonna hit!
204
00:06:33,435 --> 00:06:35,562
- Oh, my...
- Dad, make it stop!
205
00:06:35,603 --> 00:06:37,063
- Boys, back up!
Back up!
206
00:06:43,069 --> 00:06:43,236
.
207
00:06:43,278 --> 00:06:44,404
- In just a short time,
the Payne Wildfire
208
00:06:45,613 --> 00:06:46,948
has scorched
over 10,000 acres
209
00:06:46,990 --> 00:06:48,825
and remains zero percent
contained.
210
00:06:48,867 --> 00:06:50,326
- Uh, hey, Cyrus,
what happened
211
00:06:50,368 --> 00:06:52,704
to "we stress-tested the pawls,
they can hold the Hydra"?
212
00:06:52,746 --> 00:06:54,748
- They can if it was just
the weight of the car,
213
00:06:54,789 --> 00:06:55,999
but those people loaded it down
214
00:06:56,041 --> 00:06:57,959
with, like, 300 pounds
of camping gear.
215
00:06:58,001 --> 00:06:59,294
- Great.
So we'll just warn people
216
00:06:59,336 --> 00:07:00,503
the Hydra's perfectly safe
217
00:07:00,545 --> 00:07:01,838
unless you put anything
into it,
218
00:07:01,880 --> 00:07:03,423
at which point it becomes
an absolute death trap.
219
00:07:03,465 --> 00:07:06,134
- Elliot, why you scratching--
what's wrong with your face?
220
00:07:06,176 --> 00:07:08,511
- Ew, is that herpes?
- Uh-uh. How can it be herpes?
221
00:07:08,553 --> 00:07:09,721
He's not having sex
with anyone.
222
00:07:09,763 --> 00:07:11,014
Uh, okay, first of all,
223
00:07:11,056 --> 00:07:12,557
it absolutely could be herpes,
all right?
224
00:07:12,599 --> 00:07:13,933
I could have loads of herpes,
225
00:07:13,975 --> 00:07:15,185
but it is hives
from the stress.
226
00:07:15,226 --> 00:07:17,312
- Okay, guys,
there is no need to stress.
227
00:07:17,354 --> 00:07:19,564
According to six different
meteorologists,
228
00:07:19,606 --> 00:07:20,857
the wind is shifting.
229
00:07:20,899 --> 00:07:22,692
The fire's gonna burn out
in two days, max.
230
00:07:22,734 --> 00:07:23,985
What is done is done.
231
00:07:24,027 --> 00:07:25,570
All we can do now is figure out
232
00:07:25,612 --> 00:07:27,030
the best way to move forward.
233
00:07:27,072 --> 00:07:29,115
- Ian, what do you advise?
- Off the top of my head:
234
00:07:29,157 --> 00:07:31,201
hire a PI, dig up some dirt
on the people in the video.
235
00:07:31,242 --> 00:07:34,412
Was the dad high? Was he drunk?
Was he even their dad?
236
00:07:34,454 --> 00:07:36,873
Because all I saw
was a grown man,
237
00:07:36,915 --> 00:07:40,085
potentially high, in the woods
with two boys, filming.
238
00:07:40,126 --> 00:07:41,878
- This whole thing--
this is why we should've done
239
00:07:41,920 --> 00:07:43,213
a total recall
from the start.
240
00:07:43,254 --> 00:07:45,632
Oh, "Total Recall"--
"I'll be back."
241
00:07:45,674 --> 00:07:47,008
I'm with Jack.
242
00:07:47,050 --> 00:07:49,052
We've been saying
we should've done the recall
243
00:07:49,094 --> 00:07:50,303
from day one.
244
00:07:50,345 --> 00:07:52,972
- You said we shouldn't do
the recall, Cyrus.
245
00:07:53,014 --> 00:07:55,725
- Um, no, Jack, I definitely
was one of the people who said
246
00:07:55,767 --> 00:07:57,185
that we should do the recall.
247
00:07:57,227 --> 00:07:59,562
- You said,
"We better not do it."
248
00:07:59,604 --> 00:08:00,730
[all shouting]
249
00:08:00,772 --> 00:08:02,691
- We're gonna do
the recall now, okay?
250
00:08:02,732 --> 00:08:04,317
Let's do the recall now.
251
00:08:04,359 --> 00:08:06,111
Sadie, why don't you announce
it at the press conference?
252
00:08:06,152 --> 00:08:07,779
- Oh, I-I'm going back
out there?
253
00:08:07,821 --> 00:08:10,115
- I mean, Ian can jump in,
if you want.
254
00:08:10,156 --> 00:08:11,700
- No. No, no.
No, I've got it.
255
00:08:11,741 --> 00:08:13,076
I loved--I loved it.
256
00:08:13,118 --> 00:08:15,161
- And, honestly,
that was a no-win situation.
257
00:08:15,203 --> 00:08:17,455
That wouldn't have gone well
even if you'd done a good job.
258
00:08:17,497 --> 00:08:19,124
Yes, exactly.
259
00:08:19,165 --> 00:08:20,583
Hey, Katherine.
260
00:08:20,625 --> 00:08:22,627
Uh, so I know
I didn't do so great
261
00:08:22,669 --> 00:08:23,920
- with the press the other day.
- Eh...
262
00:08:23,962 --> 00:08:25,463
Yeah, you got your butt
smacked a little,
263
00:08:25,505 --> 00:08:27,090
but, I mean, look, it happens
to the best of us--
264
00:08:27,132 --> 00:08:28,925
sometimes by choice, actually.
265
00:08:28,967 --> 00:08:30,385
Yeah, I just got in my head,
266
00:08:30,427 --> 00:08:31,928
but I really want to do
a good job for you out there,
267
00:08:31,970 --> 00:08:33,722
so, I mean,
if you've got any pointers...
268
00:08:33,763 --> 00:08:35,473
Just take charge up there.
269
00:08:35,515 --> 00:08:37,058
You're a strong woman.
270
00:08:37,100 --> 00:08:38,601
- I am?
- [scoffs]
271
00:08:38,643 --> 00:08:39,686
I mean, I know that I am.
272
00:08:39,728 --> 00:08:41,229
I just--I didn't think
that you--
273
00:08:41,271 --> 00:08:43,356
- Look, sometimes, sure, you
come off a little bit at first
274
00:08:43,398 --> 00:08:45,483
like, you know, one
of Cinderella's mice on speed.
275
00:08:45,525 --> 00:08:47,485
You know, like, "Oh, we can do
this, and we can do that,
276
00:08:47,527 --> 00:08:49,029
and...
[speaking gibberish]
277
00:08:49,070 --> 00:08:52,949
Right? But underneath that,
there is a wolf, okay?
278
00:08:52,991 --> 00:08:55,201
That's the scary bitch
I want you to be.
279
00:08:55,243 --> 00:08:58,163
- Okay, want me to be, like,
a scary wolf bitch out there?
280
00:08:58,204 --> 00:08:59,289
Yeah, perfect.
281
00:08:59,330 --> 00:09:00,498
- Do that, and you'll be great.
- Okay.
282
00:09:00,540 --> 00:09:02,250
- Oh, and double up
on the antiperspirant.
283
00:09:02,292 --> 00:09:03,668
It was starting to look
like some kind of bad
284
00:09:03,710 --> 00:09:05,712
menopause drug commercial.
285
00:09:05,754 --> 00:09:07,213
Ah.
286
00:09:09,299 --> 00:09:10,342
God, okay.
287
00:09:10,383 --> 00:09:11,509
Mmm.
288
00:09:11,551 --> 00:09:13,678
- You don't break
those up first?
289
00:09:13,720 --> 00:09:15,388
- What's the difference?
- It's just weird.
290
00:09:15,430 --> 00:09:17,390
I've never seen someone eat
a Kit Kat like that.
291
00:09:17,432 --> 00:09:18,767
- [sighs]
I feel like
292
00:09:18,808 --> 00:09:20,643
I was just starting
to prove myself to Katherine,
293
00:09:20,685 --> 00:09:22,479
and then I fall apart
on live TV.
294
00:09:22,520 --> 00:09:24,647
I mean, I wasn't sweating
that much, though, was I?
295
00:09:24,689 --> 00:09:27,317
- No, no more than your average
Southern 1920s country lawyer.
296
00:09:27,359 --> 00:09:29,444
- We all react differently
to pressure.
297
00:09:29,486 --> 00:09:30,779
You sweat. I snack.
298
00:09:30,820 --> 00:09:32,989
Elliot... starts to rot.
299
00:09:33,031 --> 00:09:35,033
- Yeah, and I can't stop
working out.
300
00:09:35,075 --> 00:09:36,951
It's like I'm trying
to run away from the guilt.
301
00:09:36,993 --> 00:09:39,204
I've already lost six pounds.
302
00:09:39,245 --> 00:09:41,456
- You're a very annoying person
to be around.
303
00:09:41,498 --> 00:09:44,167
- What I want to know is, how
is Katherine staying so calm?
304
00:09:44,209 --> 00:09:45,877
Like, we're all falling apart,
305
00:09:45,919 --> 00:09:48,254
and she's becoming
the best version of herself.
306
00:09:48,296 --> 00:09:49,756
- Well, that's what being
a CEO is, you know.
307
00:09:49,798 --> 00:09:51,800
You need to be able to eat
pressure, let it nourish you.
308
00:09:51,841 --> 00:09:53,134
Just break it into pieces.
309
00:09:53,176 --> 00:09:55,345
- Why do you care?
- It's bothering me.
310
00:09:55,387 --> 00:09:56,554
Oh, don't.
311
00:09:56,596 --> 00:09:58,306
Don't you bite it.
Get--
312
00:09:58,348 --> 00:10:00,183
- Oh, my God.
- Oh, my goodness.
313
00:10:00,225 --> 00:10:01,309
Oh, my God.
314
00:10:01,351 --> 00:10:02,852
- Okay, I'll kill
the "Bloomberg" story.
315
00:10:02,894 --> 00:10:05,313
I have dirt on an editor there.
He's a sick pup.
316
00:10:05,355 --> 00:10:07,357
- Katherine, Soren's office
has called twice.
317
00:10:07,399 --> 00:10:09,025
They want to set
an emergency meeting.
318
00:10:09,067 --> 00:10:10,694
- Soren?
- Chairman of the Board.
319
00:10:10,735 --> 00:10:12,070
They were already after my job.
320
00:10:12,112 --> 00:10:14,364
I doubt they're calling
to tell me that a scandal
321
00:10:14,406 --> 00:10:17,075
and a plummeting stock price
have made them reconsider.
322
00:10:17,117 --> 00:10:18,910
- Look, my advice is,
push them off.
323
00:10:18,952 --> 00:10:21,204
Even if they are thinking
about replacing you,
324
00:10:21,246 --> 00:10:24,249
when you fix this crisis,
you'll show what you're worth.
325
00:10:24,290 --> 00:10:27,002
- It's true. Every disaster
presents an opportunity.
326
00:10:27,043 --> 00:10:28,878
This fire
could be my Chernobyl.
327
00:10:28,920 --> 00:10:31,047
- Uh, that one didn't go well,
though, right?
328
00:10:31,089 --> 00:10:32,465
- Yeah, but it could've.
- But it didn't.
329
00:10:32,507 --> 00:10:33,633
Yeah, but it will.
330
00:10:33,675 --> 00:10:35,719
Okay. All right.
Positive Chernobyl.
331
00:10:35,760 --> 00:10:37,846
- Chernobyl.
[both chuckle]
332
00:10:37,887 --> 00:10:40,056
- [sighs] I keep refreshing
my news feed,
333
00:10:40,098 --> 00:10:41,891
waiting for them
to get this fire out.
334
00:10:41,933 --> 00:10:43,393
It's awful.
335
00:10:43,435 --> 00:10:45,395
- Look, whatever happens,
you're gonna be taken care of.
336
00:10:45,437 --> 00:10:46,521
You're like family.
337
00:10:46,563 --> 00:10:49,065
Worst comes to worst,
come work for me.
338
00:10:49,107 --> 00:10:50,900
- Work for you?
Doing what?
339
00:10:50,942 --> 00:10:52,235
- I don't know.
You could be my...
340
00:10:52,277 --> 00:10:54,070
style guy/personal assistant.
341
00:10:54,112 --> 00:10:56,573
It'd be like "Entourage,"
where I'm the "star"
342
00:10:56,614 --> 00:10:58,742
and you're my best friend
who also works for me.
343
00:10:58,783 --> 00:11:00,035
We could be
double-teaming girls
344
00:11:00,076 --> 00:11:01,494
in my hot tub every night.
345
00:11:01,536 --> 00:11:03,079
- Yeah, I don't remember
that happening on "Entourage."
346
00:11:03,121 --> 00:11:05,290
- It did, offscreen.
But how awesome would that be?
347
00:11:05,331 --> 00:11:07,250
- You'd be my Turtle.
- Yeah.
348
00:11:07,292 --> 00:11:09,085
Yeah, thanks.
I'll think about it.
349
00:11:09,127 --> 00:11:10,587
Would you rather be E?
350
00:11:10,628 --> 00:11:13,340
I just figured Turtle's
the closest one to a Black guy.
351
00:11:13,381 --> 00:11:14,966
Mm.
352
00:11:15,008 --> 00:11:16,509
- Sadie. Miss Ryan.
- Sadie, are you concerned
353
00:11:16,551 --> 00:11:18,553
that Payne will lose customers
over this?
354
00:11:18,595 --> 00:11:21,097
- Uh, well, let's see, you've
lost most of your readers,
355
00:11:21,139 --> 00:11:22,682
and you're still in business.
356
00:11:22,724 --> 00:11:24,059
Tom.
357
00:11:24,100 --> 00:11:25,685
- Do you accept responsibility
for the fire?
358
00:11:25,727 --> 00:11:29,731
- Do you accept responsibility
for your weak chin?
359
00:11:29,773 --> 00:11:32,025
- Wow, attacking a reporter's
physical appearance--
360
00:11:32,067 --> 00:11:33,276
not what I would've done.
361
00:11:33,318 --> 00:11:34,778
- I mean, I told her
to be aggressive,
362
00:11:34,819 --> 00:11:36,279
but this is just catty.
363
00:11:36,321 --> 00:11:38,573
- You know, and you're gonna
feel like an idiot, Tom,
364
00:11:38,615 --> 00:11:39,908
like an absolute moron
365
00:11:39,949 --> 00:11:41,701
because you and your
Chicken Little friends here,
366
00:11:41,743 --> 00:11:43,119
{\an8}you're bitching and whining,
367
00:11:43,161 --> 00:11:45,121
{\an8}when I guarantee that this fire
368
00:11:45,163 --> 00:11:48,458
{\an8}will be out in two days, so f--
369
00:11:48,500 --> 00:11:49,626
{\an8}That was one week ago,
370
00:11:49,668 --> 00:11:51,544
{\an8}but the Payne Fire
continues to rage on,
371
00:11:51,586 --> 00:11:53,963
{\an8}now covering
over 100,000 acres
372
00:11:59,135 --> 00:11:59,302
.
373
00:11:59,344 --> 00:12:00,470
- Smoke and ash
from the inferno is drifting
374
00:12:01,096 --> 00:12:02,138
across the country,
375
00:12:02,180 --> 00:12:03,848
reddening the skies over Payne,
376
00:12:03,890 --> 00:12:05,308
as we continue wondering,
377
00:12:05,350 --> 00:12:07,727
{\an8}what did they know,
and when did they know it?
378
00:12:07,769 --> 00:12:10,313
- Welp, who would've thought
the weather geeks had
379
00:12:10,355 --> 00:12:13,066
no [bleep] damn clue
what they were talking about?
380
00:12:13,108 --> 00:12:15,276
[Sadie and Katherine chuckle]
381
00:12:15,318 --> 00:12:17,779
But, you know, there's always
black swan events
382
00:12:17,821 --> 00:12:19,781
- that you can't predict, right?
- Uh, more bad news:
383
00:12:19,823 --> 00:12:22,242
my PI couldn't dig up any dirt
on that family.
384
00:12:22,283 --> 00:12:24,077
Apparently they were his kids,
385
00:12:24,119 --> 00:12:26,079
and no one
was molesting anyone.
386
00:12:26,121 --> 00:12:27,789
- Gosh, you really
cannot win them all.
387
00:12:27,831 --> 00:12:30,417
- Also, our share price
stumbled another 12%,
388
00:12:30,458 --> 00:12:33,545
and Biden called us "a blight
on our national honor."
389
00:12:33,586 --> 00:12:35,922
- Wow.
Little harsh there, Joe, right?
390
00:12:35,964 --> 00:12:37,966
All right,
onward and upward, right?
391
00:12:38,008 --> 00:12:40,093
- Thanks, guys.
- Okay, yeah, back at it.
392
00:12:40,135 --> 00:12:41,970
- Yeah.
[chuckles]
393
00:12:43,304 --> 00:12:44,973
- How are you doing
with all this?
394
00:12:45,015 --> 00:12:46,599
I know you're dealing
with a lot.
395
00:12:46,641 --> 00:12:47,726
- Me?
- Yeah.
396
00:12:47,767 --> 00:12:49,602
- Yeah, I'm fine.
Don't worry about me.
397
00:12:49,644 --> 00:12:51,396
- If you ever want to talk
about it,
398
00:12:51,438 --> 00:12:52,772
you know,
just as, like, friends...
399
00:12:52,814 --> 00:12:54,315
[chuckles] I know we're not
friends, technically.
400
00:12:54,357 --> 00:12:56,401
I don't want to overstep,
but we could be more--
401
00:12:56,443 --> 00:12:58,028
Don't have to put
a label on it.
402
00:12:58,069 --> 00:12:59,654
- Look what came
for the conference room.
403
00:12:59,696 --> 00:13:01,823
- Oh, see, things
are looking up already.
404
00:13:01,865 --> 00:13:05,118
- I still see wah-room.
- [sighs]
405
00:13:05,160 --> 00:13:06,953
Uh, hey, guys?
406
00:13:06,995 --> 00:13:08,955
Uh, some of our internal emails
407
00:13:08,997 --> 00:13:11,332
have been leaking to the press,
and it really sounds
408
00:13:11,374 --> 00:13:13,043
like we're running around
with our hair on fire.
409
00:13:13,084 --> 00:13:14,461
It's embarrassing.
410
00:13:14,502 --> 00:13:16,629
- So maybe please stop using
the terms like, uh,
411
00:13:16,671 --> 00:13:19,466
"disaster," "clunker,"
"dumpster fire,"
412
00:13:19,507 --> 00:13:22,552
"bloodbath," "death wagon,"
"Satan's wet dream,"
413
00:13:22,594 --> 00:13:24,304
and, of course, "[bleep] show,"
"[bleep] sandwich,"
414
00:13:24,346 --> 00:13:26,306
"[bleep]storm,"
and "[bleep] fire."
415
00:13:26,348 --> 00:13:28,600
Uh, what's a [bleep] fire?
416
00:13:28,641 --> 00:13:30,935
- I can only assume it's a fire
made of [bleep]--I don't know.
417
00:13:30,977 --> 00:13:32,145
Checks out.
418
00:13:32,187 --> 00:13:34,022
I am not a bad person.
419
00:13:34,064 --> 00:13:35,440
I don't want things to burn.
420
00:13:35,482 --> 00:13:37,108
Is that what you guys think,
421
00:13:37,150 --> 00:13:39,069
that, like,
I'm on the fire's side,
422
00:13:39,110 --> 00:13:41,738
that I'm some mean fire lady?
423
00:13:41,780 --> 00:13:44,240
{\an8}This is hard.
424
00:13:44,282 --> 00:13:47,702
{\an8}Do you know how hard this
has been for-- like, for me?
425
00:13:47,744 --> 00:13:50,830
And not that--
It's not about me. I...
426
00:13:50,872 --> 00:13:53,166
I'm just--next question.
427
00:13:53,208 --> 00:13:54,959
Oh, God.
428
00:13:55,001 --> 00:13:56,753
Thank you. You have no idea
how good that feels.
429
00:13:56,795 --> 00:13:58,963
- That is making me
physically ill.
430
00:13:59,005 --> 00:14:01,007
- Oh, right, yes, it's
my dermatological condition
431
00:14:01,049 --> 00:14:02,634
that's making you feel sick and
not the fact that you're eating
432
00:14:02,676 --> 00:14:04,010
cake topped with butter.
433
00:14:04,052 --> 00:14:05,387
- It's not cake.
It's a muffin.
434
00:14:05,428 --> 00:14:06,638
A chocolate muffin is cake.
435
00:14:06,680 --> 00:14:08,390
It just has a little jacket
around it.
436
00:14:08,431 --> 00:14:10,350
- How the hell
does she remain so calm?
437
00:14:10,392 --> 00:14:11,726
She the one
with the job in jeopardy.
438
00:14:11,768 --> 00:14:13,520
Meanwhile,
we the ones falling apart.
439
00:14:13,561 --> 00:14:15,689
- Okay...
- Nothing gets to her.
440
00:14:15,730 --> 00:14:17,399
- You look
like you're doing okay.
441
00:14:17,440 --> 00:14:20,151
- I'm not. I haven't pooped
once since all this started.
442
00:14:20,193 --> 00:14:22,070
It's been over a month.
443
00:14:22,112 --> 00:14:24,072
I don't know where it goes.
444
00:14:24,114 --> 00:14:27,409
I guess it just, like...
evaporates or something.
445
00:14:27,450 --> 00:14:29,411
What day is it?
446
00:14:29,452 --> 00:14:31,121
- Wednesday.
- Yeah.
447
00:14:31,162 --> 00:14:32,872
No.
448
00:14:32,914 --> 00:14:34,791
- Friday?
- Mm.
449
00:14:34,833 --> 00:14:37,544
I can't do
any more press conferences.
450
00:14:37,585 --> 00:14:40,130
I feel like I'm in one
of those movies
451
00:14:40,171 --> 00:14:42,424
where you replay the same day
on a loop,
452
00:14:42,465 --> 00:14:44,259
but somehow
I'm learning less each time.
453
00:14:44,300 --> 00:14:46,344
- [laughing]
It's been pretty rough.
454
00:14:46,386 --> 00:14:48,430
- [chuckles] Don't laugh.
It's...
455
00:14:48,471 --> 00:14:51,558
You try embarrassing yourself
on national TV.
456
00:14:51,599 --> 00:14:54,894
- Uh, you mean like that time
I was on a news program
457
00:14:54,936 --> 00:14:57,564
and I talked about
how into a coworker I was?
458
00:14:57,605 --> 00:15:00,275
- [chuckles]
- To which she replied...
459
00:15:00,316 --> 00:15:02,277
- That's not what I did.
- Uh, it's pretty close.
460
00:15:02,318 --> 00:15:03,445
- That's not what I did.
- It's pretty close.
461
00:15:03,486 --> 00:15:05,238
You know my friends
still make fun of me
462
00:15:05,280 --> 00:15:06,448
for getting denied
in prime time?
463
00:15:06,489 --> 00:15:09,325
- I wasn't denying you.
- I'm joking.
464
00:15:09,367 --> 00:15:11,411
- No, but I'm just saying,
it wasn't, like, personal.
465
00:15:11,453 --> 00:15:12,787
- Hmm.
- You know, if we didn't work
466
00:15:12,829 --> 00:15:15,582
15 feet from each other,
then who knows?
467
00:15:15,623 --> 00:15:17,584
- So, if Payne
goes out of business
468
00:15:17,625 --> 00:15:19,419
and we all go to prison,
then...
469
00:15:19,461 --> 00:15:21,421
- Just give me a call
when you get out.
470
00:15:21,463 --> 00:15:23,381
- That's something
to look forward to.
471
00:15:23,423 --> 00:15:25,592
- Night.
- Night.
472
00:15:29,262 --> 00:15:31,556
- Hundreds
of exhausted firefighters
473
00:15:31,598 --> 00:15:33,933
are working into the night
battling the Payne Fire,
474
00:15:33,975 --> 00:15:35,310
which is now the largest
in the history of the state.
475
00:15:35,352 --> 00:15:36,561
- Wait. Stop.
Is--is that us?
476
00:15:36,603 --> 00:15:38,438
No, that's some fat guy.
477
00:15:38,480 --> 00:15:40,607
- ... have been forced
to abandon their homes.
478
00:15:40,648 --> 00:15:43,276
Oh, my God, I'm the fat guy.
479
00:15:43,318 --> 00:15:45,111
- Okay, guys,
let's stay on task.
480
00:15:45,153 --> 00:15:46,446
- Sadie...
- Mm.
481
00:15:46,488 --> 00:15:47,614
- How close are they
to putting out the fires?
482
00:15:47,655 --> 00:15:49,407
- Last I heard,
they're 2% contained,
483
00:15:49,449 --> 00:15:54,037
but, you know, 2%
of 300,000 acres--that's a lot.
484
00:15:54,079 --> 00:15:55,413
Yes, I like that optimism.
485
00:15:55,455 --> 00:15:58,124
Okay, where are we
with regulatory, Elephant Man?
486
00:15:58,166 --> 00:16:00,502
- Uh, yeah, um,
fat stack of fines
487
00:16:00,543 --> 00:16:02,379
and a congressional
investigation, I think.
488
00:16:02,420 --> 00:16:04,089
- Our stock's already
at an all-time low.
489
00:16:04,130 --> 00:16:05,548
I had to sell my boat.
490
00:16:05,590 --> 00:16:07,258
Now I'm a guy
with just one boat,
491
00:16:07,300 --> 00:16:08,635
like a frickin' cuck.
492
00:16:08,677 --> 00:16:10,679
- How about the recall,
Professor Klump?
493
00:16:10,720 --> 00:16:13,723
- Yeah, um, the recall is going
slower than expected,
494
00:16:13,765 --> 00:16:16,601
and, also, it's more expensive
than we expected.
495
00:16:16,643 --> 00:16:18,144
- Oh, my God.
- Oh.
496
00:16:18,186 --> 00:16:20,438
- Guys, come on,
it's not that bad, right?
497
00:16:20,480 --> 00:16:21,648
I mean, Ian,
I'm sure you've dealt
498
00:16:21,690 --> 00:16:23,108
with way worse situations
than this.
499
00:16:23,149 --> 00:16:25,235
Uh, no.
500
00:16:25,276 --> 00:16:26,528
Mm.
501
00:16:28,279 --> 00:16:29,864
Okay, well, uh,
502
00:16:29,906 --> 00:16:31,700
I guess tomorrow morning,
we will reconvene.
503
00:16:31,741 --> 00:16:33,493
- Uh, you got a meeting
with Soren in the morning.
504
00:16:33,535 --> 00:16:35,829
I couldn't put him off anymore.
He's coming in person.
505
00:16:35,870 --> 00:16:37,163
Ah.
506
00:16:37,205 --> 00:16:39,457
Wow, he's, uh, flying in
for the meeting.
507
00:16:39,499 --> 00:16:40,792
Oh.
[chuckles]
508
00:16:40,834 --> 00:16:42,293
Must be important.
509
00:16:42,335 --> 00:16:44,170
- Well, he probably doesn't
want to fire you over Zoom.
510
00:16:44,212 --> 00:16:45,588
[all groan]
511
00:16:45,630 --> 00:16:47,716
- Okay, like I'm the only one
in here thinking it.
512
00:16:47,757 --> 00:16:49,759
- Maybe--maybe he just wants
to see the frogs.
513
00:16:49,801 --> 00:16:51,678
- What frogs?
- You haven't been outside?
514
00:16:51,720 --> 00:16:53,304
There's all these frogs
from the Detroit River
515
00:16:53,346 --> 00:16:54,514
trying to get away
from the smoke.
516
00:16:54,556 --> 00:16:55,849
Yeah, they're everywhere.
517
00:16:55,890 --> 00:16:58,143
They got into my kitchen,
just ribbiting all night.
518
00:16:58,184 --> 00:17:01,312
[laughing]
519
00:17:03,565 --> 00:17:05,775
Wait.
I'm sorry, did you say "frogs"?
520
00:17:05,817 --> 00:17:07,819
- What--what's so funny?
- [laughs] I mean, it's funny.
521
00:17:07,861 --> 00:17:10,113
[laughter]
522
00:17:10,155 --> 00:17:11,489
These frogs?
523
00:17:11,531 --> 00:17:12,699
Every time, I think to myself,
524
00:17:12,741 --> 00:17:14,534
"This is as bad
as it can get," right?
525
00:17:14,576 --> 00:17:16,745
[laughs]
And then, nope, frogs.
526
00:17:16,786 --> 00:17:19,539
[laughing]
527
00:17:19,581 --> 00:17:21,583
It's biblical, you know?
528
00:17:21,624 --> 00:17:23,126
[laughs]
529
00:17:23,168 --> 00:17:26,129
I mean, there's fires,
darkness, a guy with boils.
530
00:17:26,171 --> 00:17:28,048
- T-they're hives.
- [laughs]
531
00:17:28,089 --> 00:17:29,549
And now frogs!
532
00:17:29,591 --> 00:17:31,468
- Ooh, and my boat--that
could be, like, a Noah thing.
533
00:17:31,509 --> 00:17:34,804
- [laughing]
- It's--it's gonna be okay.
534
00:17:34,846 --> 00:17:36,598
- No, no, no,
it's not gonna be okay, okay?
535
00:17:36,639 --> 00:17:39,559
We all know
it's not gonna be okay.
536
00:17:39,601 --> 00:17:41,436
I mean, I tell you guys
it's gonna be okay.
537
00:17:41,478 --> 00:17:44,147
- And you know why?
- 'C--'cause you don't lose?
538
00:17:44,189 --> 00:17:45,732
- No, I tell you
it's gonna be okay
539
00:17:45,774 --> 00:17:48,401
so that you all
don't panic, okay?
540
00:17:48,443 --> 00:17:50,737
[laughs] I mean, outside,
I'm all like,
541
00:17:50,779 --> 00:17:53,323
"Hey, guys, everything's
gonna be just fine.
542
00:17:53,365 --> 00:17:55,325
Brighter days tomorrow.
Cheer up, okay?"
543
00:17:55,367 --> 00:17:56,910
Do you want to know
what I'm thinking inside?
544
00:17:56,951 --> 00:17:59,746
Would you like to know
what I am thinking inside?
545
00:17:59,788 --> 00:18:00,789
Yeah, yeah.
546
00:18:00,830 --> 00:18:02,332
[bleep]!
547
00:18:02,374 --> 00:18:04,250
We're [bleep]!
548
00:18:04,292 --> 00:18:05,585
We're [bleep]!
549
00:18:05,627 --> 00:18:09,172
We're all [bleep]!
550
00:18:09,214 --> 00:18:11,716
All of us are [bleep]!
551
00:18:11,758 --> 00:18:13,510
All right!
552
00:18:13,551 --> 00:18:15,637
Well, I'd say
I'd see you tomorrow,
553
00:18:15,679 --> 00:18:17,347
but my money's on an asteroid
destroying the planet
554
00:18:17,389 --> 00:18:18,390
by morning.
555
00:18:18,431 --> 00:18:21,267
[smooth music]
556
00:18:21,309 --> 00:18:24,187
* *
557
00:18:24,229 --> 00:18:28,358
You're a nation of inbreds!
That's why you lost the war!
558
00:18:33,071 --> 00:18:33,279
.
559
00:18:33,321 --> 00:18:36,199
[frogs croaking]
560
00:18:38,243 --> 00:18:39,744
Hey.
561
00:18:39,786 --> 00:18:41,871
- You meet with Soren yet?
- Not yet.
562
00:18:41,913 --> 00:18:44,666
But I got the heads-up
this morning: I'm out.
563
00:18:44,708 --> 00:18:47,043
- Oh, I'm so sorry.
- Please don't be.
564
00:18:47,085 --> 00:18:48,378
It is fine.
565
00:18:48,420 --> 00:18:49,754
I mean, my lawyer says
566
00:18:49,796 --> 00:18:51,297
that my early-termination
penalties are so broad,
567
00:18:51,339 --> 00:18:52,924
they're gonna end up paying me
more than I would've made
568
00:18:52,966 --> 00:18:54,509
in five years
of actually working here, so...
569
00:18:54,551 --> 00:18:55,927
- Oh, really?
- Yeah.
570
00:18:55,969 --> 00:18:57,804
- Jeez, I got to check
my contract.
571
00:18:57,846 --> 00:19:01,599
- Yeah, I think I am due
for some well-earned self-care.
572
00:19:01,641 --> 00:19:03,727
- Spend some time with Richard...
- Yeah.
573
00:19:03,768 --> 00:19:05,603
You know, read, travel,
574
00:19:05,645 --> 00:19:08,273
drink Bellinis on the beach
at dawn.
575
00:19:08,314 --> 00:19:09,941
- [laughs]
- I'm happy for you.
576
00:19:11,651 --> 00:19:12,902
- Thank you.
- Oh.
577
00:19:12,944 --> 00:19:14,404
Thank you for everything.
578
00:19:14,446 --> 00:19:16,531
- [laughs] You're welcome.
- Yeah.
579
00:19:16,573 --> 00:19:18,283
[laughing]
580
00:19:18,324 --> 00:19:19,701
And you're welcome, too.
581
00:19:19,743 --> 00:19:21,286
- Yes, right,
thank you for everything.
582
00:19:21,327 --> 00:19:22,620
Absolutely are welcome.
583
00:19:22,662 --> 00:19:23,788
Was it one of those little,
584
00:19:23,830 --> 00:19:25,665
polite "thanks, sweetie"
type hugs?
585
00:19:25,707 --> 00:19:28,418
- No, it was like
an actual, genuine embrace.
586
00:19:28,460 --> 00:19:29,627
How did she feel?
587
00:19:29,669 --> 00:19:30,795
I feel like she'd feel cold,
588
00:19:30,837 --> 00:19:32,464
like hugging Elsa
from "Frozen."
589
00:19:32,505 --> 00:19:33,840
No, just normal.
590
00:19:33,882 --> 00:19:36,634
She was happy. I think this
is a good thing for her.
591
00:19:36,676 --> 00:19:38,887
- Oh, it's the end of an era,
you know?
592
00:19:38,928 --> 00:19:41,389
Not a very long one, but, uh--
but an era nonetheless.
593
00:19:41,431 --> 00:19:43,558
- Yo.
- Mm?
594
00:19:43,600 --> 00:19:44,976
- I just had
a telehealth visit,
595
00:19:45,018 --> 00:19:47,562
and doctor said
if I don't poop soon,
596
00:19:47,604 --> 00:19:50,940
they're gonna have to medically
induce the poop out of me.
597
00:19:54,110 --> 00:19:58,323
- We, uh, added a little bonus
for bowing out graciously.
598
00:19:58,365 --> 00:20:00,033
It's more than generous.
599
00:20:00,075 --> 00:20:02,160
- Well, I'm sorry
about all this.
600
00:20:02,202 --> 00:20:04,954
There's just a lot
of very angry shareholders,
601
00:20:04,996 --> 00:20:07,749
so a few heads have to roll.
602
00:20:07,791 --> 00:20:09,125
A few heads?
603
00:20:09,167 --> 00:20:10,543
I knew about my head.
604
00:20:10,585 --> 00:20:12,754
I didn't realize
that there would be other...
605
00:20:12,796 --> 00:20:15,298
Any specific heads
or just any old head?
606
00:20:15,340 --> 00:20:18,426
- Not many, just, you know,
whoever knew about the pawls.
607
00:20:18,468 --> 00:20:20,679
Yeah, um, Cyrus Knight,
608
00:20:20,720 --> 00:20:22,847
Elliot Chisholm, Sadie Ryan,
609
00:20:22,889 --> 00:20:24,683
- a few others.
- Okay.
610
00:20:24,724 --> 00:20:26,351
- Anyway,
thanks for everything,
611
00:20:26,393 --> 00:20:28,061
and we wish you luck.
612
00:20:32,399 --> 00:20:34,693
Give us six months.
613
00:20:34,734 --> 00:20:36,361
- I'm sorry?
- Yeah, six months.
614
00:20:36,403 --> 00:20:37,570
Let me keep my team.
615
00:20:37,612 --> 00:20:38,905
If--if we can't get
the stock price
616
00:20:38,947 --> 00:20:40,824
back to where it was
before all this happened,
617
00:20:40,865 --> 00:20:44,160
then I will walk, and you
don't have to pay me a dime.
618
00:20:44,202 --> 00:20:45,495
Hang on.
619
00:20:45,537 --> 00:20:46,871
Best-case scenario--
620
00:20:46,913 --> 00:20:49,124
you work your ass off
to make less
621
00:20:49,165 --> 00:20:51,251
than what you already have
on the table in front of you,
622
00:20:51,292 --> 00:20:53,169
or you lose everything.
623
00:20:53,211 --> 00:20:56,006
[steady music]
624
00:20:56,047 --> 00:20:57,424
Oh. Hey.
625
00:20:57,465 --> 00:20:59,801
- Hey.
- Hey, there she is.
626
00:20:59,843 --> 00:21:01,594
{\an8}- Come here, you.
- No.
627
00:21:01,636 --> 00:21:03,888
{\an8}- Oh.
- I'm gonna be sticking around.
628
00:21:03,930 --> 00:21:05,557
{\an8}- Hey.
- I sweet-talked them.
629
00:21:05,598 --> 00:21:06,933
{\an8}- Wow!
- That's great.
630
00:21:06,975 --> 00:21:08,977
{\an8}- What happened to self-care?
631
00:21:09,019 --> 00:21:12,272
{\an8}- Let's just say I cared more
about something else.
632
00:21:12,313 --> 00:21:14,190
{\an8}- Huh.
- Hmm.
633
00:21:14,232 --> 00:21:16,776
{\an8}- Basically, they were gonna
fire all you guys,
634
00:21:16,818 --> 00:21:18,486
{\an8}and I threw myself on a grenade
to save your jobs.
635
00:21:18,528 --> 00:21:22,032
{\an8}It was very heroic, and you all
owe me big-time, so...
636
00:21:22,073 --> 00:21:23,658
{\an8}Uh...
637
00:21:23,700 --> 00:21:25,035
{\an8}Huh.
638
00:21:25,076 --> 00:21:27,203
{\an8}I am not gonna forget it.
639
00:21:27,245 --> 00:21:30,623
{\an8}[smooth music]