1
00:00:06,006 --> 00:00:08,467
There she is! Aw.
2
00:00:08,467 --> 00:00:10,385
You excited for the show?
3
00:00:10,385 --> 00:00:12,513
Don't be nervous. You're gonna do great.
4
00:00:12,513 --> 00:00:14,389
You make a perfect Statue of Liberty.
5
00:00:14,389 --> 00:00:16,892
Daddy and I are very proud of you.
6
00:00:17,476 --> 00:00:19,811
And after the show,
7
00:00:20,312 --> 00:00:24,316
I have something very important
that I need to talk to you about.
8
00:00:24,900 --> 00:00:27,361
Big changes are happening.
9
00:00:27,361 --> 00:00:29,780
- All good things. All--
- [door opens]
10
00:00:30,405 --> 00:00:31,406
Hello?
11
00:00:41,166 --> 00:00:42,417
Carlos?
12
00:00:42,417 --> 00:00:44,878
[smacks lips]
Nope. Sorry, it's just me, not Carlos.
13
00:00:44,878 --> 00:00:46,630
What are you doing here? What is going on?
14
00:00:46,630 --> 00:00:48,131
We said that we would meet at the school.
15
00:00:48,131 --> 00:00:50,968
Yeah, and you also said
that her costume would be in her bag.
16
00:00:50,968 --> 00:00:53,554
There was the toga. There was the crown,
but there's no torch. No torch.
17
00:00:53,554 --> 00:00:54,972
- I-- What?
- [Maya] Mommy?
18
00:00:55,472 --> 00:00:59,184
Hi, sweetie. Oh, my goodness.
You so excited for the show?
19
00:00:59,184 --> 00:01:00,561
No.
20
00:01:00,561 --> 00:01:03,105
[Sheila] Oh, don't be nervous.
You're gonna do great.
21
00:01:03,105 --> 00:01:04,647
You make a perfect Statue of Liberty.
22
00:01:04,647 --> 00:01:06,692
Not without my torch.
23
00:01:06,692 --> 00:01:10,571
Jesus Christ. The undercarriage
of this couch is absolutely disturbing.
24
00:01:10,571 --> 00:01:12,531
When was the last time
you just-- [stammers]
25
00:01:12,531 --> 00:01:15,117
Maya, hey, come on.
Can you go look in your room, please?
26
00:01:15,117 --> 00:01:16,618
She's not gonna find it in there
27
00:01:16,618 --> 00:01:19,913
because I packed her entire costume
in the bag that she took to your house.
28
00:01:20,414 --> 00:01:22,291
All you had to do was not lose it, Danny.
29
00:01:22,291 --> 00:01:23,750
Damn it, we don't have any time.
30
00:01:23,750 --> 00:01:25,627
- This is a mess.
- Yeah, the pressure's on, Sheila.
31
00:01:25,627 --> 00:01:28,213
I've already sweat through one sport coat.
Want me to ruin a second one?
32
00:01:28,213 --> 00:01:31,008
I want you to stop fucking up every single
thing that you come into contact with.
33
00:01:31,008 --> 00:01:33,594
I want you to stop fucking everyone too,
including my assistant.
34
00:01:33,594 --> 00:01:35,721
Wow. Okay, well,
I'm trying to help Maya right now,
35
00:01:35,721 --> 00:01:37,639
and you're the one
that's making it about something else.
36
00:01:37,639 --> 00:01:41,143
But I could ask you what you believe
this revolving door of lovers
37
00:01:41,143 --> 00:01:42,728
- that you're subjecting--
- [Maya] I found it!
38
00:01:42,728 --> 00:01:44,813
[breathing heavily]
39
00:01:48,734 --> 00:01:50,402
[breathes deeply]
40
00:01:51,069 --> 00:01:53,071
[Maya] My farm animal set.
41
00:01:54,072 --> 00:01:56,200
Maya, we thought you had found the torch.
42
00:01:56,200 --> 00:01:57,659
No, that's not here.
43
00:01:57,659 --> 00:02:00,037
Well, we don't know that. Not yet.
44
00:02:00,037 --> 00:02:01,455
Can I have a snack?
45
00:02:01,455 --> 00:02:04,541
[Sheila] Oh, sweetie, I don't think
we have time for a snack before the show.
46
00:02:04,541 --> 00:02:05,751
[Maya] But I'm hungry.
47
00:02:05,751 --> 00:02:09,795
Uh, okay, well,
maybe I can quickly make you something.
48
00:02:09,795 --> 00:02:11,465
What-- What sounds yummy, sweetheart?
49
00:02:11,465 --> 00:02:14,051
Mommy doesn't really keep yummy stuff
in her house, sweetheart,
50
00:02:14,051 --> 00:02:15,802
so maybe try to think
of something not yummy.
51
00:02:16,428 --> 00:02:18,222
How about Daddy makes you a snack?
52
00:02:18,722 --> 00:02:19,806
Does that sound good, sweetie?
53
00:02:28,982 --> 00:02:31,318
All right. [breathes heavily]
54
00:02:32,736 --> 00:02:34,905
[breathes deeply]
55
00:02:34,905 --> 00:02:37,574
It's a big change, for sure.
56
00:02:38,158 --> 00:02:44,289
But that's what life is all about,
is changes and-- and challenges...
57
00:02:47,292 --> 00:02:48,293
Oh.
58
00:02:48,794 --> 00:02:53,507
[stammers] No, no, no. Oh, no, no.
No! How?
59
00:02:55,008 --> 00:02:56,009
[sighs]
60
00:03:00,138 --> 00:03:03,308
[Sheila]
No one sees that. It's not even there.
61
00:03:05,018 --> 00:03:07,145
[breathing deeply]
62
00:03:07,145 --> 00:03:10,941
It's not even finished.
You don't have time to make it right.
63
00:03:12,734 --> 00:03:14,069
You already did this.
64
00:03:14,903 --> 00:03:16,238
Now end it.
65
00:03:20,576 --> 00:03:21,702
[trash can lid clanks]
66
00:03:25,080 --> 00:03:26,540
I've got an idea.
67
00:03:27,040 --> 00:03:29,126
How about we perform torchless?
68
00:03:29,126 --> 00:03:32,045
You know, we just mime it.
Just play pretend.
69
00:03:32,045 --> 00:03:33,922
I mean, that's what plays really are.
70
00:03:33,922 --> 00:03:35,507
Come on, don't bullshit her.
71
00:03:36,300 --> 00:03:38,844
[sighs] Danny, could you please not swear
so much in front of Maya?
72
00:03:38,844 --> 00:03:41,263
Yeah, no, that's the most damaging thing
going on around here.
73
00:03:41,263 --> 00:03:42,848
Can I talk to you for a second?
74
00:03:42,848 --> 00:03:45,142
[breathing heavily] Okay.
75
00:03:46,310 --> 00:03:47,811
[sighs] What?
76
00:03:47,811 --> 00:03:50,647
I don't appreciate these
passive-aggressive accusations that you--
77
00:03:50,647 --> 00:03:52,608
Look, I have a right
to look after Maya's well-being.
78
00:03:52,608 --> 00:03:55,611
[scoffs] Oh, it is breathtaking
how delusional you are.
79
00:03:55,611 --> 00:03:57,821
No, no, you don't get to throw that shit
at me anymore, okay?
80
00:03:57,821 --> 00:03:59,406
Not after the sacrifices that I have made.
81
00:03:59,406 --> 00:04:01,742
What have you ever denied yourself?
82
00:04:01,742 --> 00:04:06,121
I-- I would love an itemized list of the
sacrifices you have made for your family.
83
00:04:06,121 --> 00:04:08,373
- Then I will fucking make a list for you!
- [Maya] Daddy!
84
00:04:08,373 --> 00:04:11,627
- Do you have a fucking pen?
- Stop screaming! You're scaring her!
85
00:04:11,627 --> 00:04:13,170
I am? I'm scaring her? Me?
86
00:04:13,170 --> 00:04:14,171
- Yes, you!
- [Maya] Mommy!
87
00:04:14,171 --> 00:04:17,132
I am so fucking tired of you
blaming me for every goddamn thing
88
00:04:17,132 --> 00:04:19,343
that happens in this family
or in this world.
89
00:04:19,343 --> 00:04:22,763
Do you know what? Yes, I might
misplace a torch or two once in a while,
90
00:04:22,763 --> 00:04:24,139
but I'm not a bad person!
91
00:04:24,139 --> 00:04:26,266
- The insa--
- Grown-ups!
92
00:04:30,479 --> 00:04:31,939
[swallows]
93
00:04:31,939 --> 00:04:34,483
Maya, take that out of your mouth
right now, please.
94
00:04:34,483 --> 00:04:36,443
Maya, this isn't funny.
Take that out. Sheila?
95
00:04:36,443 --> 00:04:37,528
Honey, spit it out.
96
00:04:37,528 --> 00:04:39,488
- Spit it out.
- I can't. I swallowed her.
97
00:04:39,488 --> 00:04:42,741
This is serious, Maya. You have to
spit this out of your mouth right now.
98
00:04:42,741 --> 00:04:44,952
- Stop it! You're scaring her. You're okay.
- Well, she's scaring me!
99
00:04:44,952 --> 00:04:46,912
- She's okay.
- We're going to the hospital right now.
100
00:04:46,912 --> 00:04:48,580
- No, we are not.
- No! No hospital!
101
00:04:48,580 --> 00:04:51,333
You don't get a vote. You've just put
something very dangerous in your body.
102
00:04:51,333 --> 00:04:52,417
You're panicking. Calm down.
103
00:04:52,417 --> 00:04:55,629
Yeah, of course, I'm panicking!
And for good reason! Follow my lead!
104
00:04:55,629 --> 00:04:56,964
Just take a second, please.
105
00:04:56,964 --> 00:05:00,342
Hold on a second while my daughter
dies of toxic levels of piggy plastic?
106
00:05:00,342 --> 00:05:01,844
Okay. Okay. You know what, sweetie?
107
00:05:01,844 --> 00:05:04,513
Please stay here.
I'm just gonna talk to Daddy for a second.
108
00:05:04,513 --> 00:05:05,931
- Come with me.
- [sighs]
109
00:05:10,978 --> 00:05:15,023
{\an8}Ow. Ow. God!
Would you stop manhandling me?
110
00:05:15,023 --> 00:05:17,025
- Jesus Christ.
- You need to pull it together.
111
00:05:17,025 --> 00:05:19,903
We don't fucking know
what that pig is even made out of.
112
00:05:19,903 --> 00:05:22,906
It could be... [stammers]
...lead or mercury or barium!
113
00:05:22,906 --> 00:05:24,825
- We don't know that.
- [sighs]
114
00:05:24,825 --> 00:05:26,451
I have high hopes for Maya's death, okay?
115
00:05:26,451 --> 00:05:27,953
I would like her to be in her 90s.
116
00:05:27,953 --> 00:05:30,205
I would like her to be surrounded
by friends and family.
117
00:05:30,205 --> 00:05:33,125
Not six years old, surrounded
by fucking toxic farm animals.
118
00:05:33,125 --> 00:05:36,170
- So, yes, I'm scared, okay?
- Okay. Oka-- I get it. I get-- I get it.
119
00:05:36,170 --> 00:05:38,922
You're taking this seriously
because it's serious.
120
00:05:38,922 --> 00:05:40,591
Yes.
And I would like that out of her ASAP.
121
00:05:40,591 --> 00:05:42,092
We're on the same team here. We just--
122
00:05:42,092 --> 00:05:44,511
- Take a breath with me, okay? [inhales]
- What?
123
00:05:44,511 --> 00:05:47,306
Inhale through the nose.
Exhale... [exhales deeply]
124
00:05:47,306 --> 00:05:48,390
[breathing deeply]
125
00:05:48,390 --> 00:05:50,976
...through the mouth. Inhale.
[inhales deeply]
126
00:05:50,976 --> 00:05:53,103
- Take a beat.
- [both breathing deeply]
127
00:06:07,534 --> 00:06:09,661
[inhales deeply, sighs]
128
00:06:09,661 --> 00:06:12,539
Do we still have the encyclopedia set
that your dad made me buy?
129
00:06:13,457 --> 00:06:14,541
We do.
130
00:06:14,541 --> 00:06:18,504
Okay. On-the-fives tummy check.
How's your tummy feeling now, Maya?
131
00:06:18,504 --> 00:06:19,588
Same. Fine.
132
00:06:19,588 --> 00:06:22,424
Okay, and you'll tell us
if it's any different, won't you?
133
00:06:22,424 --> 00:06:27,596
Okay, barium, what have you got for us?
Okay. "Ingestion can lead to... [sighs]
134
00:06:27,596 --> 00:06:30,349
...organ failure
and developmental problems."
135
00:06:31,475 --> 00:06:34,603
[sighs] Okay, well,
we don't know that it contains barium.
136
00:06:34,603 --> 00:06:38,649
And also, it has a higher risk in children
because of their more rapid metabolism,
137
00:06:38,649 --> 00:06:42,569
and barium can also spontaneously combust.
That's fun.
138
00:06:42,569 --> 00:06:45,322
[chuckles] I hate this country.
I actually hate all countries.
139
00:06:45,322 --> 00:06:47,449
Would you take this back
to Maya's room, please?
140
00:06:47,449 --> 00:06:50,744
I just think that if we could find out
where we got the toy,
141
00:06:50,744 --> 00:06:53,830
then we could get the brand
and find the box and read the label,
142
00:06:53,830 --> 00:06:57,376
and then I could feel--
we-- we could feel less scared.
143
00:06:57,376 --> 00:06:58,627
I think it was a gift.
144
00:06:58,627 --> 00:07:01,213
I really don't think
I would have bought her a farm-themed toy.
145
00:07:01,213 --> 00:07:02,422
[Maya gasps] Grandma Lolli!
146
00:07:02,422 --> 00:07:05,133
Grandma Lolli bought me a farm set
for my birthday.
147
00:07:05,133 --> 00:07:06,885
Really? Are you sure, sweetie?
148
00:07:06,885 --> 00:07:09,930
She said,
"Your mommy would never buy you this."
149
00:07:09,930 --> 00:07:12,099
That sounds exactly like Grandma Lolli.
150
00:07:12,099 --> 00:07:14,476
Oh, very good. Great job, Maya. Okay.
151
00:07:15,227 --> 00:07:16,854
I can call. I don't have the baggage.
152
00:07:17,688 --> 00:07:18,689
I'm good.
153
00:07:19,189 --> 00:07:20,440
Okay. [sighs]
154
00:07:21,441 --> 00:07:23,026
[sighs]
155
00:07:24,403 --> 00:07:27,239
[breathes deeply]
156
00:07:36,331 --> 00:07:38,250
[sighs]
157
00:07:59,188 --> 00:08:00,189
[chuckles]
158
00:08:05,152 --> 00:08:06,486
[sighs, chuckles]
159
00:08:14,536 --> 00:08:17,497
[breathes shakily]
160
00:08:20,250 --> 00:08:22,586
[sniffles, sighs]
161
00:08:22,586 --> 00:08:24,505
[breathes deeply]
162
00:08:26,006 --> 00:08:27,174
[chuckles]
163
00:08:27,966 --> 00:08:30,177
[sniffling]
164
00:08:31,386 --> 00:08:34,264
- [sighs]
- [Maya] Daddy, come here!
165
00:08:37,100 --> 00:08:38,434
[sniffles, clears throat]
166
00:08:43,857 --> 00:08:45,651
Yes, yes, he's here right now.
167
00:08:46,151 --> 00:08:47,361
They're talking about you.
168
00:08:47,361 --> 00:08:49,321
Because he's still her father, and I--
169
00:08:50,197 --> 00:08:52,366
Maybe it is confusing for her.
I-I don't know. I--
170
00:08:52,366 --> 00:08:53,534
Mother, can we not?
171
00:08:53,534 --> 00:08:57,871
I just need you to remember
where you purchased the set because--
172
00:08:58,747 --> 00:09:00,082
because Maya loves it so much,
173
00:09:00,082 --> 00:09:03,710
and I was planning on giving one
to her friend for her birthday.
174
00:09:03,710 --> 00:09:06,129
Which friend? Jenny S.? Jenny G.? Jenny--
175
00:09:06,129 --> 00:09:08,841
Don't interrupt Mommy
when she's lying to Lolli, okay?
176
00:09:08,841 --> 00:09:10,133
Tummy check?
177
00:09:10,133 --> 00:09:11,927
I feel a little like going.
178
00:09:11,927 --> 00:09:14,513
Okay, that's potty time.
That's all I need to hear.
179
00:09:14,513 --> 00:09:15,597
All aboard.
180
00:09:16,515 --> 00:09:17,516
- I really--
- [Danny grunts]
181
00:09:17,516 --> 00:09:19,142
I don't understand why it's insu--
182
00:09:20,435 --> 00:09:21,895
Wait, wha-- What are you getting?
183
00:09:21,895 --> 00:09:25,649
Please, Mother, don't.
Please, don't get off the phone. [sighs]
184
00:09:35,868 --> 00:09:37,035
This is ten dollars.
185
00:09:37,578 --> 00:09:38,829
It's a lot of money.
186
00:09:39,413 --> 00:09:42,249
And all of it is yours if you just go
to the bathroom, okay?
187
00:09:42,249 --> 00:09:45,294
It's gonna be right here waiting for you,
all right?
188
00:09:45,294 --> 00:09:47,671
[inhales sharply]
Hey, any intel from Cruella?
189
00:09:47,671 --> 00:09:49,590
- Uh, a lot, actually.
- Okay.
190
00:09:49,590 --> 00:09:51,258
She found the check
that she bought the toy with.
191
00:09:51,258 --> 00:09:52,384
That's impressive.
192
00:09:52,384 --> 00:09:53,844
So she called Clemson's Toys,
193
00:09:53,844 --> 00:09:56,221
- which is, of course, closed.
- Less impressive.
194
00:09:56,221 --> 00:09:58,348
But she knows Mrs. Clemson
from her garden club,
195
00:09:58,348 --> 00:09:59,892
- so she called their house.
- Okay.
196
00:09:59,892 --> 00:10:02,978
And she got on the line
with Mr. Clemson himself.
197
00:10:02,978 --> 00:10:05,772
Keystone Collectibles
Farm and Barnyard Set.
198
00:10:05,772 --> 00:10:08,400
- Oh, Grandma Lolli coming through.
- [chuckles]
199
00:10:08,400 --> 00:10:09,318
[Danny grunts]
200
00:10:11,069 --> 00:10:13,113
- Sorry. Uh--
- No. Mm-hmm.
201
00:10:13,113 --> 00:10:15,157
- Gr-- Uh, great. Great, good. Yeah.
- That's fine. Yeah, no.
202
00:10:15,157 --> 00:10:16,366
- What-- What are you doing?
- Uh...
203
00:10:16,366 --> 00:10:18,827
I'm gonna go call the old ladies
at the reference desk at the library,
204
00:10:18,827 --> 00:10:19,995
so wish me luck.
205
00:10:19,995 --> 00:10:22,289
- [stammers] But it's nine o'clock.
- Oh, they're there.
206
00:10:22,289 --> 00:10:23,582
They'll be there all night.
207
00:10:28,003 --> 00:10:29,004
[Sheila] Hey.
208
00:10:30,088 --> 00:10:33,509
[sighs] How are you doing?
209
00:10:37,137 --> 00:10:40,265
Well, when my daughter is finally
off of the can,
210
00:10:40,265 --> 00:10:42,226
uh, the entire family is coming
down there.
211
00:10:42,226 --> 00:10:46,396
Sweet treats for, uh, the ladies
at the reference desk, I'll tell you that.
212
00:10:46,396 --> 00:10:48,357
Okay, Joyce. Thank you. Bye.
213
00:10:49,316 --> 00:10:53,570
Oh, my God. I don't care what anyone says,
the library is fucking cool as shit.
214
00:10:53,570 --> 00:10:54,738
Okay. Good news?
215
00:10:54,738 --> 00:10:56,782
- Great news. They looked up the toy set.
- Yeah?
216
00:10:56,782 --> 00:10:59,952
They looked up every single
material listed. Nothing toxic.
217
00:10:59,952 --> 00:11:02,371
- Okay! No barium?
- No barium!
218
00:11:02,371 --> 00:11:03,997
- Whoo! Whoo!
- And just like that,
219
00:11:03,997 --> 00:11:05,832
I love this goddamn country again.
220
00:11:05,832 --> 00:11:09,461
- Oh, man.
- [chuckles] Oh, my God.
221
00:11:10,671 --> 00:11:13,340
- [clicks tongue, chuckles]
- [sighing] Hmm.
222
00:11:14,258 --> 00:11:17,761
[swallows] I don't know what happened
with that, um... [sniffles] ...kiss thing.
223
00:11:17,761 --> 00:11:20,889
I think I just forgot for a second
what my life actually was.
224
00:11:20,889 --> 00:11:22,641
Oh, it was nothing.
225
00:11:22,641 --> 00:11:26,019
I'm just... [stammers]
...grateful that we-- we figured this out.
226
00:11:26,019 --> 00:11:27,938
- Together. [chuckles]
- Yeah.
227
00:11:27,938 --> 00:11:29,231
I-I want you to know that.
228
00:11:30,023 --> 00:11:32,568
Yeah, me too. [chuckles]
229
00:11:32,568 --> 00:11:35,070
Because, you know... [sighs] ...it just--
230
00:11:35,070 --> 00:11:37,489
- And, uh, you will take over?
- Okay. Yes.
231
00:11:37,489 --> 00:11:40,450
- You be the head of the poop patrol.
- Okay. Uh-huh.
232
00:11:40,450 --> 00:11:42,578
And I'm gonna go ahead and head home.
233
00:11:42,578 --> 00:11:44,288
And just give me a call
when it emerges. Yeah.
234
00:11:44,288 --> 00:11:45,747
Yeah. Yeah, that makes sense.
235
00:11:45,747 --> 00:11:49,209
I'm not going to sleep anyway,
so you should, uh-- you should go.
236
00:11:49,209 --> 00:11:51,295
- Get some rest. Yeah.
- Yeah. [chuckles] Yeah.
237
00:11:51,879 --> 00:11:53,755
I'm not pooping without Daddy.
238
00:11:54,590 --> 00:11:55,674
Well, that's very sweet, but--
239
00:11:55,674 --> 00:11:59,011
I want a whole-family pizza party
or no poop!
240
00:12:00,012 --> 00:12:01,513
[clears throat, sighs]
241
00:12:02,431 --> 00:12:03,599
[doorbell rings]
242
00:12:05,058 --> 00:12:08,061
Hey. Come on in. You don't have to
wait out there. [chuckles]
243
00:12:08,061 --> 00:12:09,146
That'll be 8.50.
244
00:12:09,146 --> 00:12:11,023
Wow. Really? Huh.
245
00:12:12,065 --> 00:12:15,110
Well, I hope some of that is trickling
down to, uh, you and your ilk.
246
00:12:16,028 --> 00:12:19,239
Oh, shit. Shit, shit, shit.
No. No, no, no, no, no, no.
247
00:12:19,239 --> 00:12:23,076
[sighs] I thought I had cash in here,
but I don't.
248
00:12:23,076 --> 00:12:24,620
No one here has 8.50?
249
00:12:24,620 --> 00:12:28,415
[shushing] Yes, shut up. Sorry.
Yes, people here do have 8.50.
250
00:12:28,415 --> 00:12:31,752
My ex-wife-- ex-wife is here.
251
00:12:32,252 --> 00:12:34,338
And she has lots of 8.50
'cause she's rich.
252
00:12:34,338 --> 00:12:36,465
I am just... [inhales deeply] ...Danny.
253
00:12:36,465 --> 00:12:38,300
Tell you what I would like
to not have to do
254
00:12:38,300 --> 00:12:40,219
is go ask my ex-wife,
255
00:12:40,219 --> 00:12:44,139
in front of my daughter
who's also here... [sighs]
256
00:12:44,139 --> 00:12:46,517
...for 8.50 to pay for this pizza, okay?
257
00:12:47,809 --> 00:12:49,811
Can you help me out here?
Can you save my life?
258
00:12:50,521 --> 00:12:54,441
Oh, are-- are you fa-- uh, familiar
with the French luxury brand Hermès?
259
00:12:54,441 --> 00:12:56,401
This is not available. This is my mom's.
260
00:12:56,401 --> 00:12:57,819
Well, no, it's my w-wife's.
261
00:12:57,819 --> 00:12:59,404
Ex-wife. Jesus Christ.
262
00:12:59,404 --> 00:13:02,199
Fuck. [chuckles]
It's been a-- It's been a day.
263
00:13:02,908 --> 00:13:04,201
What is going on right now?
264
00:13:04,201 --> 00:13:06,495
Do you smoke? Because I have grass.
I can pay you in gra--
265
00:13:06,495 --> 00:13:07,663
Just take the pizza.
266
00:13:07,663 --> 00:13:09,540
- I can have it?
- Yeah. [sighs]
267
00:13:09,540 --> 00:13:13,293
Oh, my God. Trent. Trent, thank you.
Oh, you saved me.
268
00:13:13,293 --> 00:13:16,129
- End this hug, or I'll take it back.
- Yes. Yes. Yes.
269
00:13:16,630 --> 00:13:17,673
You're right. That's fair.
270
00:13:19,049 --> 00:13:20,634
Oh, my God.
271
00:13:22,177 --> 00:13:23,220
[sighs]
272
00:13:23,220 --> 00:13:27,599
{\an8}Oh, I don't know if you care or whatever,
but this was knocked over outside.
273
00:13:27,599 --> 00:13:30,018
{\an8}Or, like, hidden maybe, in the bushes.
274
00:13:30,018 --> 00:13:32,729
{\an8}Anyway, it might have been ran over.
It might have been by me.
275
00:13:38,527 --> 00:13:40,404
[Danny sighs] Cheap pizza.
276
00:13:40,404 --> 00:13:43,031
It will destroy me, but I accept my fate.
277
00:13:43,782 --> 00:13:45,033
Like Scoots.
278
00:13:46,034 --> 00:13:47,911
- How dare you? God.
- What's Scoots?
279
00:13:47,911 --> 00:13:52,082
- It's a restaurant on Catalina...
- A human rights violation.
280
00:13:52,082 --> 00:13:53,542
...which is an island.
281
00:13:53,542 --> 00:13:56,628
Which is where your mom
and I went for our honeymoon.
282
00:13:56,628 --> 00:14:00,048
And a honeymoon is a vacation
that you take after you get married.
283
00:14:00,716 --> 00:14:02,801
- I know about honeymoons.
- [Sheila] Oh, okay.
284
00:14:02,801 --> 00:14:05,262
So, one afternoon during our honeymoon,
285
00:14:05,262 --> 00:14:07,139
your daddy rented a sailboat
286
00:14:07,139 --> 00:14:08,265
- to take us out...
- [Danny] Mmm.
287
00:14:08,265 --> 00:14:11,894
...and look at the sunset
and sip champagne and--
288
00:14:11,894 --> 00:14:14,062
- Kiss and stuff?
- [Sheila] Exactly.
289
00:14:14,062 --> 00:14:17,399
But before we got on the boat,
we went to this restaurant, Scoots.
290
00:14:17,399 --> 00:14:20,527
[chuckles] And then everything changed.
291
00:14:20,527 --> 00:14:22,237
[chuckles]
292
00:14:22,237 --> 00:14:23,822
Yeah. But not right away.
293
00:14:23,822 --> 00:14:28,994
We went out on the boat first, and,
you know, it was a truly beautiful day.
294
00:14:30,704 --> 00:14:33,332
It was. Pink skies, perfect weather.
295
00:14:35,459 --> 00:14:36,919
That's when the pooping started.
296
00:14:37,419 --> 00:14:39,755
[Sheila laughing]
297
00:14:39,755 --> 00:14:41,465
Did the boat have a potty?
298
00:14:41,465 --> 00:14:43,967
Yeah, well, let's just say
at the beginning of the trip,
299
00:14:43,967 --> 00:14:45,886
- the boat did have a potty...
- [laughs]
300
00:14:45,886 --> 00:14:48,180
...and by the end, um...
301
00:14:48,180 --> 00:14:50,057
Daddy broke the potty.
302
00:14:50,057 --> 00:14:53,101
[all chuckling]
303
00:14:55,229 --> 00:14:58,315
TV on the toilet. The American dream.
304
00:14:58,315 --> 00:15:01,860
[inhales deeply] I bet Reagan's
doing the same thing as we speak.
305
00:15:01,860 --> 00:15:04,196
You want a drink?
Like a glass of wine, beer?
306
00:15:04,196 --> 00:15:05,906
No, no, I'm good.
307
00:15:05,906 --> 00:15:08,617
Well, yeah. Yeah, of course, I do.
308
00:15:08,617 --> 00:15:10,577
I don't know why I said that just now.
309
00:15:11,245 --> 00:15:13,747
What kind of wine are you pouring
these days?
310
00:15:22,714 --> 00:15:25,259
I don't wanna get into this right now.
311
00:15:26,051 --> 00:15:28,470
- I'm really tired. And I just--
- Yeah. All right.
312
00:15:28,470 --> 00:15:31,348
Were you gonna tell me, or were you
just gonna wait until I found out?
313
00:15:31,348 --> 00:15:35,310
Of course, I was gonna tell you.
We have to work out the logistics.
314
00:15:35,310 --> 00:15:37,646
Didn't think I would care?
Like I wouldn't have feelings about it?
315
00:15:38,230 --> 00:15:42,484
I know you do. But your feelings aren't--
316
00:15:43,694 --> 00:15:44,820
aren't my job anymore.
317
00:15:47,781 --> 00:15:48,782
Is it him?
318
00:15:49,616 --> 00:15:51,451
Are you, uh, moving in
with your boyfriend?
319
00:15:52,452 --> 00:15:53,787
I don't have to tell you that.
320
00:15:54,288 --> 00:15:58,375
[scoffs, sighs]
321
00:15:59,585 --> 00:16:00,794
Carlos and I broke up.
322
00:16:04,131 --> 00:16:06,008
I bought a place at the beach. [sighs]
323
00:16:07,134 --> 00:16:08,635
At-- Not the--
324
00:16:09,678 --> 00:16:11,722
The place that we've talked about
and looked at?
325
00:16:11,722 --> 00:16:13,974
- In LA. Santa Monica.
- [scoffs]
326
00:16:13,974 --> 00:16:16,602
Sheila, you hate LA.
327
00:16:17,311 --> 00:16:19,771
We moved to San Diego because you hate LA.
328
00:16:19,771 --> 00:16:21,565
I'm starting over. Clean slate.
329
00:16:21,565 --> 00:16:24,318
Sure. Bought and paid for by John Breem.
330
00:16:24,318 --> 00:16:27,529
Bought and paid for by me. Fuck you.
331
00:16:29,323 --> 00:16:31,325
We were just saying goodbye that night.
332
00:16:31,325 --> 00:16:34,453
Not that I owe you
an explanation for that.
333
00:16:36,038 --> 00:16:37,915
While you were sleeping with my assistant.
334
00:16:37,915 --> 00:16:39,875
What do you mean s-- "goodbye?"
335
00:16:42,294 --> 00:16:45,172
He's gone to be a fundamentalist
with his wife and family.
336
00:16:47,841 --> 00:16:53,805
And how, uh-- [sniffles]
How are you doing with that?
337
00:16:54,598 --> 00:16:55,807
Do you really care?
338
00:16:56,391 --> 00:16:58,352
Yes. Always.
339
00:16:58,352 --> 00:17:02,648
[sighs] I-I'm angry, and I'm jealous.
340
00:17:03,315 --> 00:17:04,316
Yeah, me too.
341
00:17:06,484 --> 00:17:08,028
Not of her, of him.
342
00:17:09,738 --> 00:17:12,782
Having something so solid to return to.
343
00:17:12,782 --> 00:17:15,911
[chuckles] Yeah, that sounds pretty great.
344
00:17:18,497 --> 00:17:20,749
[Maya] I think it's coming out!
345
00:17:24,795 --> 00:17:27,339
Well, does anybody wanna say anything?
346
00:17:29,591 --> 00:17:32,886
Hey, you know what?
Why don't you do the honors?
347
00:17:32,886 --> 00:17:33,971
You've earned it.
348
00:17:35,264 --> 00:17:38,517
[toilet flushes]
349
00:17:38,517 --> 00:17:42,229
[all] ♪ I love you, a bushel and a peck ♪
350
00:17:42,855 --> 00:17:47,484
♪ I love you with a hug around the neck ♪
351
00:17:49,319 --> 00:17:51,613
I love you, my big girl. Mmm.
352
00:17:53,365 --> 00:17:55,409
Love you, Maya. Never change.
353
00:17:55,993 --> 00:17:57,286
I love you, Mommy.
354
00:17:57,286 --> 00:17:58,954
And I forgive you, Daddy.
355
00:17:58,954 --> 00:18:02,040
You didn't mean to drive scary.
Night night.
356
00:18:06,044 --> 00:18:07,045
And I'm sorry.
357
00:18:07,045 --> 00:18:11,091
[both speaking indistinctly]
358
00:18:12,718 --> 00:18:14,386
- I don't care. No.
- Do you? Do you?
359
00:18:14,386 --> 00:18:15,971
No, I don't care.
360
00:18:16,680 --> 00:18:19,433
[speaking indistinctly]
361
00:18:19,933 --> 00:18:23,061
I made a mistake. I am sorry.
362
00:18:23,061 --> 00:18:25,355
It isn't something... [indistinct]
363
00:18:25,355 --> 00:18:27,024
...and go on and on and on about.
364
00:18:27,024 --> 00:18:28,525
I'm not... [continues indistinctly]
365
00:18:29,401 --> 00:18:30,986
[breathes deeply]
366
00:18:30,986 --> 00:18:33,989
You know, in retrospect,
I'm glad we never got a dog.
367
00:18:34,615 --> 00:18:37,993
[chuckles] Me too, I guess.
368
00:18:37,993 --> 00:18:40,537
Just one too many things to keep alive.
[chuckles]
369
00:18:43,916 --> 00:18:46,168
[smacks lips]
So that's why she was a mouse. [sighs]
370
00:18:47,878 --> 00:18:50,964
Yeah. I feel like shit about it. [sighs]
371
00:18:50,964 --> 00:18:52,382
Well, what's that gonna change?
372
00:18:52,883 --> 00:18:55,969
[scoffs] Nothing. [sniffles]
373
00:18:59,264 --> 00:19:02,976
Mattaes Healy, you ever talked
to Maya about him?
374
00:19:02,976 --> 00:19:07,564
[laughs] You're that desperate
to change the subject?
375
00:19:07,564 --> 00:19:08,857
Yeah, clearly.
376
00:19:08,857 --> 00:19:11,235
No. God, no. Why would I?
377
00:19:11,235 --> 00:19:13,153
'Cause he's part of your life story.
378
00:19:14,029 --> 00:19:16,865
You know, I took his Stoics lecture
out of pure spite.
379
00:19:16,865 --> 00:19:19,284
I don't think he cared or noticed.
380
00:19:19,284 --> 00:19:25,290
I was so infuriated that he got to--
that he proposed to you, and you said yes.
381
00:19:25,290 --> 00:19:27,042
I never went through with it.
382
00:19:27,042 --> 00:19:28,961
And you were seeing someone else too.
383
00:19:29,711 --> 00:19:31,380
Ellen from Fresno.
384
00:19:31,380 --> 00:19:33,298
Another student, not a department chair.
385
00:19:35,717 --> 00:19:36,927
But all I wanted was you.
386
00:19:37,761 --> 00:19:38,804
Don't do this.
387
00:19:38,804 --> 00:19:39,930
You don't ever do that?
388
00:19:39,930 --> 00:19:44,351
You don't ever look back
and just kinda think about that time?
389
00:19:45,686 --> 00:19:48,438
Uh, I try not to. I'm moving forward.
390
00:19:48,438 --> 00:19:51,650
That's the whole point. This is why
I need a fresh start, just to--
391
00:19:51,650 --> 00:19:54,152
You try not to.
So that means that sometimes you--
392
00:19:54,152 --> 00:19:55,946
- I don't pine over our college--
- Affair.
393
00:19:57,406 --> 00:20:00,117
That's what it was. You and me.
That's how we started.
394
00:20:00,117 --> 00:20:01,702
Our clandestine affair.
395
00:20:01,702 --> 00:20:03,996
I know what it was.
I-I don't think about it.
396
00:20:05,622 --> 00:20:06,915
Well, I don't believe you.
397
00:20:09,668 --> 00:20:12,462
To this day, I have never seen
you happier than you were then.
398
00:20:14,631 --> 00:20:17,384
We were children. Children are happy.
We were playacting.
399
00:20:17,384 --> 00:20:20,387
We were in love, and we were making love.
400
00:20:21,305 --> 00:20:24,266
And we were 20. We were hardly children.
401
00:20:24,266 --> 00:20:25,642
It wasn't real life.
402
00:20:26,560 --> 00:20:27,644
You liked it.
403
00:20:29,646 --> 00:20:30,898
Don't tell me what I like.
404
00:20:31,481 --> 00:20:34,151
You don't know what I like anymore.
I have other things now.
405
00:20:34,151 --> 00:20:35,694
- My work.
- Back then.
406
00:20:35,694 --> 00:20:39,072
And besides, I've been lying to people
about my feelings my whole life.
407
00:20:39,698 --> 00:20:42,451
- I'm very good at it. I always have been.
- [scoffs]
408
00:20:42,451 --> 00:20:43,577
Don't do that.
409
00:20:44,786 --> 00:20:47,080
Don't minimize what we had
in our little bubble.
410
00:20:48,123 --> 00:20:50,834
I knew you to your marrow back then.
411
00:20:50,834 --> 00:20:52,211
And it was special.
412
00:20:52,961 --> 00:20:54,463
We're over, Danny.
413
00:20:55,214 --> 00:20:57,090
Yeah, I know. Believe me.
414
00:21:00,552 --> 00:21:02,804
- [Danny sighs]
- [door closes]
415
00:21:02,804 --> 00:21:05,432
I'm just talking about
being grateful, okay?
416
00:21:05,432 --> 00:21:09,102
And I bet John Breem was grateful too
for whatever bubble you had with him.
417
00:21:09,102 --> 00:21:10,687
You wanna fight? Is that it?
418
00:21:10,687 --> 00:21:12,689
No, I don't. I just-- [sighs]
419
00:21:12,689 --> 00:21:15,567
I want you to admit
that then was real and good.
420
00:21:15,567 --> 00:21:18,654
Fine. Fine. Back then was good.
421
00:21:18,654 --> 00:21:21,448
Maybe a bubble is the only place
that's good for me.
422
00:21:21,448 --> 00:21:22,950
I-Is that what you're saying?
423
00:21:23,575 --> 00:21:25,911
No, I don't think so.
424
00:21:27,579 --> 00:21:29,373
[sighs] I should go.
425
00:21:30,958 --> 00:21:32,251
You drunk enough to drive?
426
00:21:32,960 --> 00:21:33,961
That's witty.
427
00:21:34,628 --> 00:21:36,004
I've overstayed my welcome.
428
00:21:38,215 --> 00:21:43,220
No. [laughs] On the contrary,
I feel like you're finally making sense.
429
00:21:43,220 --> 00:21:46,139
An affair is the best
that I could hope for in my love life.
430
00:21:46,139 --> 00:21:52,354
Compartmentalized, sexy but shameful,
temporary, destined to fail.
431
00:21:52,354 --> 00:21:56,024
The only thing I can really ever
be married to is my work, right?
432
00:21:56,024 --> 00:21:59,361
So I should move to LA,
where everybody's terrible, like me.
433
00:21:59,361 --> 00:22:00,529
- Don't say that.
- Oh.
434
00:22:01,488 --> 00:22:03,615
I am terrible.
I'm a terrible fucking person.
435
00:22:03,615 --> 00:22:04,700
Let me show you.
436
00:22:06,201 --> 00:22:07,703
- No, come. Come with me.
- [sighs]
437
00:22:07,703 --> 00:22:09,955
Let me show you. [sighs]
438
00:22:09,955 --> 00:22:13,333
You know, Carlos is a good person,
or so you said.
439
00:22:13,333 --> 00:22:15,252
And you chose him.
So that should mean something.
440
00:22:15,252 --> 00:22:18,213
Yeah, he is. Yeah. But not me. [chuckles]
441
00:22:18,213 --> 00:22:22,467
That's me, Lady Liberty.
A big fucking liar.
442
00:22:24,469 --> 00:22:26,805
- Mystery solved. Yeah.
- Yeah.
443
00:22:26,805 --> 00:22:28,640
- I forgot that I hadn't finished it...
- Mmm.
444
00:22:28,640 --> 00:22:30,309
...and I forgot
that I didn't put it in the bag,
445
00:22:30,309 --> 00:22:31,602
so I buried it.
446
00:22:31,602 --> 00:22:34,479
[laughs] Good people don't do this
to their daughters.
447
00:22:34,479 --> 00:22:36,648
[stammers] Good people don't exist. Okay?
448
00:22:36,648 --> 00:22:39,276
It's purely a myth.
Everyone is mostly terrible.
449
00:22:39,860 --> 00:22:42,070
Here. Case in point. Look at this.
450
00:22:42,070 --> 00:22:44,531
- I was in here earlier, and I--
- Oh, just snooping around my room?
451
00:22:44,531 --> 00:22:46,408
Yes, I was snooping around your room,
452
00:22:46,408 --> 00:22:50,037
and it really meant something to me
that you held on to this,
453
00:22:50,037 --> 00:22:53,040
that it meant something to you,
even though my mother gave it to you,
454
00:22:53,040 --> 00:22:55,209
and you didn't even like her.
For good reason.
455
00:22:55,209 --> 00:22:57,920
But I kept it.
I slipped it into my pocket.
456
00:22:58,754 --> 00:22:59,755
Terrible me.
457
00:22:59,755 --> 00:23:01,298
Your mom didn't give me that.
458
00:23:01,298 --> 00:23:03,884
That's from my cousin Judy
when I was a bridesmaid at her wedding.
459
00:23:03,884 --> 00:23:10,599
No. No, my mother gave this to you
when you were a bride in our wedding.
460
00:23:14,353 --> 00:23:18,941
Well, I have-- I have no memory of
that because I-I'm a terrible person.
461
00:23:18,941 --> 00:23:20,901
- No, you're not.
- Goddamn it!
462
00:23:20,901 --> 00:23:25,239
Danny, please just stop thinking
that you know me because you don't, okay?
463
00:23:25,239 --> 00:23:27,241
- Nobody does.
- God, fuck!
464
00:23:27,241 --> 00:23:28,617
- [glass breaks]
- [gasps]
465
00:23:28,617 --> 00:23:31,411
Goddamn it! [breathing deeply]
466
00:23:38,377 --> 00:23:40,045
[sighs]
467
00:23:40,045 --> 00:23:41,755
I'm gonna make you a bed on the couch.
468
00:23:45,342 --> 00:23:46,635
[sighs]
469
00:23:59,773 --> 00:24:02,651
[Sheila] This lack of sleep is going
to show on your skin tomorrow.
470
00:24:04,278 --> 00:24:05,821
You don't want him to come in here.
471
00:24:07,281 --> 00:24:08,699
You don't want him to.
472
00:24:10,117 --> 00:24:11,118
You don't.
473
00:24:11,910 --> 00:24:12,911
You don't.
474
00:24:20,252 --> 00:24:21,962
[sighs]
475
00:24:24,298 --> 00:24:27,885
It's over. Go to sleep.
476
00:24:32,472 --> 00:24:33,724
[sighs]
477
00:24:45,861 --> 00:24:46,862
[sighs]
478
00:24:49,656 --> 00:24:50,657
[Danny] Hey.
479
00:26:08,443 --> 00:26:10,654
- Hey.
- Yeah?
480
00:26:10,654 --> 00:26:13,657
I should probably go to my room,
you know, for Maya.
481
00:26:14,825 --> 00:26:16,034
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
482
00:26:16,535 --> 00:26:18,787
Yeah. We don't want her to get
the wrong impression.
483
00:26:32,301 --> 00:26:35,804
- My breath probably smells terrible.
- No, it's fine. Mine is--
484
00:26:35,804 --> 00:26:38,348
[exhales sharply, sniffs] Yeah.
485
00:26:39,057 --> 00:26:40,893
- [chuckles] Mine is pretty terrible.
- [chuckles]
486
00:26:43,478 --> 00:26:44,980
Hey, did you, um--
487
00:26:47,024 --> 00:26:51,486
Did you really mean what you said,
that I don't really know you?
488
00:26:52,821 --> 00:26:55,741
[Sheila] There it is again. That need.
489
00:26:56,325 --> 00:26:59,286
You don't have to give him this.
You don't owe him a thing.
490
00:27:02,581 --> 00:27:06,210
Danny, you know me as well as anyone.
491
00:27:08,962 --> 00:27:10,839
- Yeah.
- [chuckles]
492
00:27:25,729 --> 00:27:26,772
[sighs]