1 00:00:17,843 --> 00:00:18,975 Let me be clear. 2 00:00:21,456 --> 00:00:24,807 To truly grasp man's struggle for power... 3 00:00:24,937 --> 00:00:27,897 we must begin in the prehistoric sea... 4 00:00:28,028 --> 00:00:30,030 that dark and merciless void. 5 00:00:32,075 --> 00:00:34,164 It was eons before the strongest among us 6 00:00:34,251 --> 00:00:36,645 slithered out of the muck to discover 7 00:00:36,732 --> 00:00:38,951 that the lessons of darkness would continue on land. 8 00:00:40,388 --> 00:00:43,782 Futility. Toil. 9 00:00:43,869 --> 00:00:47,873 The mass of men spend their days plowing stones. 10 00:00:48,004 --> 00:00:52,530 But true immortality rests in a pure and mighty will... 11 00:00:52,661 --> 00:00:55,881 for history isn't written by the feeble masses, 12 00:00:56,012 --> 00:00:58,101 the pissants... 13 00:00:58,232 --> 00:01:02,018 commies, the queers, and the women. 14 00:01:02,105 --> 00:01:04,499 It is written and rewritten 15 00:01:04,629 --> 00:01:06,718 by soldiers carrying the banner of kings. 16 00:01:09,547 --> 00:01:11,201 That is what it means to be strong. 17 00:01:14,161 --> 00:01:16,467 That is what it means to be American. 18 00:01:19,340 --> 00:01:20,863 That is what it means... 19 00:01:22,560 --> 00:01:24,171 to be Nixon. 20 00:01:40,187 --> 00:01:41,797 You know her as one of the most outspoken 21 00:01:41,927 --> 00:01:44,278 conservatives in Washington. 22 00:01:44,408 --> 00:01:46,088 You've seen her onRowan & Martin's Laugh-In 23 00:01:46,149 --> 00:01:47,672 andThe Dinah Shore Show. 24 00:01:47,803 --> 00:01:49,326 Ladies and gentlemen, 25 00:01:49,457 --> 00:01:50,762 the wife of the Attorney General 26 00:01:50,893 --> 00:01:52,460 of the United States, 27 00:01:52,590 --> 00:01:54,592 the infamous Mouth of the South, 28 00:01:54,723 --> 00:01:56,116 Martha Mitchell. 29 00:02:06,604 --> 00:02:08,737 Well, welcome, Mrs. Mitchell. 30 00:02:08,867 --> 00:02:10,584 I hope you are ready to tell the whole truth 31 00:02:10,608 --> 00:02:12,175 and nothing but the truth. 32 00:02:12,306 --> 00:02:13,805 Well, if you're gonna put me on the stand, 33 00:02:13,829 --> 00:02:15,069 I better have my lawyer present. 34 00:02:17,093 --> 00:02:18,877 Now, Martha, 35 00:02:18,964 --> 00:02:20,884 I have heard the rumor that your husband was made 36 00:02:21,010 --> 00:02:23,534 the director of the Committee to Re-elect the President. 37 00:02:23,665 --> 00:02:26,146 Yes. And I am the secret weapon. 38 00:02:26,233 --> 00:02:27,973 I bet you are. 39 00:02:28,060 --> 00:02:29,888 Fuck, she is cheesy. 40 00:02:29,975 --> 00:02:33,718 Martha Mitchell all dressed up like a holiday ham. 41 00:02:33,849 --> 00:02:35,894 Nice smile, though. 42 00:02:35,981 --> 00:02:36,981 I can dig on that smile. 43 00:02:37,069 --> 00:02:38,593 And a orangutan. 44 00:02:38,723 --> 00:02:40,638 She's an idiot and a lush. 45 00:02:41,552 --> 00:02:43,946 Why are you leaving all of a sudden? 46 00:02:44,076 --> 00:02:46,340 Stay. We can watch some Password. 47 00:02:46,427 --> 00:02:49,125 - Oh, yeah? - Do the thing... 48 00:02:49,212 --> 00:02:50,996 - again. - That sounds nice. 49 00:02:51,083 --> 00:02:52,781 But my boss doesn't exactly understand 50 00:02:52,911 --> 00:02:57,264 the, uh, finer points of the long lunch. 51 00:02:57,394 --> 00:02:59,222 Oh, yeah? Who's your boss? 52 00:02:59,309 --> 00:03:00,745 Mm. 53 00:03:00,832 --> 00:03:03,183 That is on a need-to-know basis. 54 00:03:04,967 --> 00:03:06,969 Well, thank you. It's fascinating. 55 00:03:07,099 --> 00:03:09,841 Oh, hold up. 56 00:03:09,972 --> 00:03:11,887 You work for Nixon? 57 00:03:12,017 --> 00:03:14,324 Oh, you're big-time. You know, I knew it. 58 00:03:14,455 --> 00:03:16,892 The second I saw this place, I thought to myself, "Wow." 59 00:03:17,022 --> 00:03:18,609 This guy right here, he's big-time-plus." 60 00:03:18,633 --> 00:03:20,112 Well, you're the expert. 61 00:03:20,243 --> 00:03:22,332 - Who's your superior? - What? 62 00:03:22,463 --> 00:03:24,291 Who do you report to at the White House? 63 00:03:24,421 --> 00:03:27,381 Haldeman? Ehrlichman? Hess? 64 00:03:27,511 --> 00:03:32,037 Colson? Atwater? Buchanan? Chapin? Fleming? 65 00:03:32,168 --> 00:03:33,430 You know a lot of people. 66 00:03:33,561 --> 00:03:35,519 Honey, it's my job to network... 67 00:03:35,650 --> 00:03:37,391 among other jobs. 68 00:03:37,521 --> 00:03:39,262 At least you're at the Oval. 69 00:03:39,393 --> 00:03:42,178 You could be stuck with those headless turkeys over at CREEP. 70 00:03:42,309 --> 00:03:43,669 CREEP's the Committee to Re-elect... 71 00:03:43,788 --> 00:03:45,573 The President. I know what CREEP stands for. 72 00:03:45,703 --> 00:03:47,705 I actually spend quite a lot of time over there. 73 00:03:47,836 --> 00:03:49,490 - Yeah. - Ah. 74 00:03:49,620 --> 00:03:50,858 I used to work for the guy who was gonna be 75 00:03:50,882 --> 00:03:51,962 Nixon's new campaign chair. 76 00:03:52,057 --> 00:03:54,408 John-boy? Oh, my God! 77 00:03:54,538 --> 00:03:56,497 You tell him Francesca says hi. 78 00:03:56,627 --> 00:03:58,803 You know John Mitchell too? 79 00:03:58,934 --> 00:04:00,675 Sure I do. He's a dear friend. 80 00:04:00,805 --> 00:04:02,435 Hope he's keeping up with all that spring cleaning 81 00:04:02,459 --> 00:04:04,505 - over there. - Wait. 82 00:04:04,635 --> 00:04:05,767 Spring clean... You... 83 00:04:08,987 --> 00:04:10,772 You think h-h-he... Is he pushing people out? 84 00:04:10,902 --> 00:04:12,687 I didn't say that. 85 00:04:12,817 --> 00:04:14,254 I didn't not say it either. 86 00:04:14,428 --> 00:04:16,343 ♪ ...for you and me ♪ 87 00:04:33,011 --> 00:04:34,883 You are wanted. 88 00:04:35,013 --> 00:04:37,712 You are essential. You cannot be fired. 89 00:04:54,772 --> 00:04:58,472 ♪ Well, down on the Street where the faces shine ♪ 90 00:05:02,737 --> 00:05:05,305 ♪ Floatin' around, On a real O-Mind ♪ 91 00:05:08,438 --> 00:05:12,573 ♪ I see a pretty thing ♪ 92 00:05:12,660 --> 00:05:15,967 ♪ Ain't no wall ♪ 93 00:05:16,141 --> 00:05:18,187 ♪ I see a pretty thing ♪ 94 00:05:20,450 --> 00:05:23,061 ♪ Ain't no wall ♪ 95 00:05:23,235 --> 00:05:25,281 ♪ No walls ♪ 96 00:05:25,455 --> 00:05:27,675 ♪ No walls ♪ 97 00:05:27,805 --> 00:05:30,591 ♪ No walls ♪ 98 00:05:46,084 --> 00:05:47,956 ♪ Look at you ♪ 99 00:06:03,363 --> 00:06:05,190 A $52 phone call? 100 00:06:05,321 --> 00:06:07,236 Who the fuck is Martha talking to 101 00:06:07,367 --> 00:06:09,586 at two o'clock in the morning in Los Angeles? 102 00:06:09,717 --> 00:06:11,347 Uh, Lloyd Shearer at Parade. That would be my guess. 103 00:06:11,371 --> 00:06:12,807 He's a known subversive leftist. 104 00:06:12,937 --> 00:06:14,069 Cocksucker. 105 00:06:14,199 --> 00:06:15,636 Not sure about that, sir, 106 00:06:15,766 --> 00:06:17,366 but I can pull up his file if you'd like. 107 00:06:18,813 --> 00:06:21,555 I was explicit with her. 108 00:06:21,685 --> 00:06:23,485 No solo interviews this close to the election. 109 00:06:27,125 --> 00:06:29,650 Any luck tracking down my wife? 110 00:06:29,780 --> 00:06:32,261 She hasn't returned from her taping yet, sir. 111 00:06:32,392 --> 00:06:34,132 But I have John Dean here for you. 112 00:06:34,263 --> 00:06:37,484 Oh, God. Yeah, send the fucker in. 113 00:06:41,052 --> 00:06:43,054 Dean, you flaxen-haired dog. How you doing, buddy? 114 00:06:43,141 --> 00:06:44,380 - Yeah, good to see you. - You take a seat. 115 00:06:44,404 --> 00:06:46,580 - Sir. - Dean. 116 00:06:46,667 --> 00:06:48,712 You look well. 117 00:06:48,799 --> 00:06:52,803 So, uh, I was told you wanted to see me about something. 118 00:06:52,934 --> 00:06:54,805 Oh, yes. 119 00:06:54,936 --> 00:06:56,435 Uh, as you know, we're gearing up for what promises to be 120 00:06:56,459 --> 00:06:58,026 a grueling reelection campaign. 121 00:06:58,156 --> 00:07:01,072 And as such, we are currently reevaluating 122 00:07:01,203 --> 00:07:04,380 certain select personnel. 123 00:07:04,511 --> 00:07:06,382 "Reevaluating"? 124 00:07:06,513 --> 00:07:08,340 Yeah, that's right. Hey, tell me something. 125 00:07:08,471 --> 00:07:10,038 Where do you see yourself in a year? 126 00:07:10,168 --> 00:07:12,040 Where do... in a... 127 00:07:12,170 --> 00:07:14,390 Hmm, that's a... That's a great question. 128 00:07:14,521 --> 00:07:16,827 Um... 129 00:07:16,914 --> 00:07:19,264 Well, let me start by saying, 130 00:07:19,395 --> 00:07:20,807 I have very much valued the opportunity 131 00:07:20,831 --> 00:07:22,431 to help implement the president's vision. 132 00:07:22,529 --> 00:07:24,661 And I would urge you to remember my loyalty 133 00:07:24,792 --> 00:07:26,837 when considering my continued service 134 00:07:26,968 --> 00:07:29,231 in whatever capacity that service might be needed, 135 00:07:29,361 --> 00:07:32,234 uh, going forward 136 00:07:32,321 --> 00:07:34,628 forthwith... 137 00:07:34,758 --> 00:07:36,673 in the future. 138 00:07:36,804 --> 00:07:39,850 What the fuck is that supposed to mean? 139 00:07:39,981 --> 00:07:42,113 I think he thinks this is 140 00:07:42,244 --> 00:07:45,029 some kind of spring-cleaning situation, sir. 141 00:07:45,160 --> 00:07:47,249 Wait, what? 142 00:07:47,379 --> 00:07:48,966 So you're not recommending that I be fired? 143 00:07:48,990 --> 00:07:50,470 No. Gosh, no! No. 144 00:07:50,557 --> 00:07:52,341 We brought you in here because we've uh, 145 00:07:52,428 --> 00:07:54,474 we got a kind of special opportunity for you. 146 00:07:54,604 --> 00:07:55,910 - Oh. - Yeah. 147 00:07:56,040 --> 00:07:57,999 Wow. Okay. Um... 148 00:07:58,129 --> 00:07:59,672 I assume you're aware of the Intelligence Unit 149 00:07:59,696 --> 00:08:01,089 that was set up in the Oval 150 00:08:01,219 --> 00:08:02,545 after this whole Pentagon Papers fiasco? 151 00:08:02,569 --> 00:08:03,874 Right. The Plumbers. 152 00:08:04,005 --> 00:08:05,397 Yeah, that-that's right. 153 00:08:05,528 --> 00:08:08,139 Uh, there's a CIA reject named Howard Hunt. 154 00:08:08,226 --> 00:08:09,793 He's the main guy over there. 155 00:08:09,924 --> 00:08:12,143 And they're currently graduating 156 00:08:12,230 --> 00:08:16,191 from rooting out leaks to, uh, rat-fucking the Democrats. 157 00:08:16,321 --> 00:08:18,976 And there is a desire 158 00:08:19,063 --> 00:08:22,589 to enact a uh, similar operation 159 00:08:22,719 --> 00:08:24,852 on the campaign side of things. 160 00:08:27,115 --> 00:08:29,596 You mean you want to set up an espionage unit... 161 00:08:29,683 --> 00:08:31,859 here, in-inside the Committee to Re-elect 162 00:08:31,989 --> 00:08:33,600 to spy on the Democrats? 163 00:08:33,730 --> 00:08:35,253 - Oh, heavens, no, no. - No. 164 00:08:35,340 --> 00:08:36,777 Espionage? That's a... that's... 165 00:08:36,907 --> 00:08:38,518 That's a big... That's a serious word. 166 00:08:38,648 --> 00:08:41,172 No, we're talking about simple intelligence gathering. 167 00:08:42,696 --> 00:08:45,263 I see. Um... 168 00:08:45,394 --> 00:08:47,701 Nixon has 19 points on the Dems. 169 00:08:47,831 --> 00:08:49,398 The election is practically in the bag. 170 00:08:49,529 --> 00:08:52,183 Why would we risk that kind of legal exposure? 171 00:08:52,270 --> 00:08:53,837 It's not our job to ask why. 172 00:08:53,968 --> 00:08:57,014 If men like us asked why, we wouldn't have the pyramids. 173 00:08:57,145 --> 00:09:01,715 Swollen wet vaginas. 174 00:09:03,978 --> 00:09:06,371 We are good men. 175 00:09:06,502 --> 00:09:08,156 We are men of integrity. 176 00:09:08,243 --> 00:09:09,940 But we come 177 00:09:10,071 --> 00:09:14,031 from our mothers' swollen wet vaginas 178 00:09:14,118 --> 00:09:16,556 with flaws. 179 00:09:16,643 --> 00:09:20,081 And a time comes where we need to employ those flaws 180 00:09:20,168 --> 00:09:22,213 to defeat our enemy. 181 00:09:22,344 --> 00:09:24,955 We must become snakes. 182 00:09:30,961 --> 00:09:33,921 I see, uh... 183 00:09:34,051 --> 00:09:35,052 Well, look... 184 00:09:38,055 --> 00:09:41,885 I'm not sure that it would be prudent for me 185 00:09:42,016 --> 00:09:45,933 to pursue any... 186 00:09:46,063 --> 00:09:49,806 snake behavior for you... 187 00:09:49,937 --> 00:09:53,462 at this specific point in time. 188 00:09:53,593 --> 00:09:56,508 Hmm. 189 00:09:56,596 --> 00:09:59,120 Shit. 190 00:09:59,250 --> 00:10:01,470 Well, I'll tell the president. 191 00:10:01,601 --> 00:10:03,559 Sorry, the... the president? 192 00:10:03,690 --> 00:10:05,474 Who the fuck do you think asked for you? 193 00:10:05,605 --> 00:10:06,780 President Nixon asked for me? 194 00:10:06,867 --> 00:10:08,259 Well, to be clear, 195 00:10:08,346 --> 00:10:09,802 the president would never involve himself 196 00:10:09,826 --> 00:10:11,175 in anything illegal, but, yes. 197 00:10:11,262 --> 00:10:12,655 It's a damn shame. 198 00:10:12,742 --> 00:10:14,962 We thought maybe you were one of us, but... 199 00:10:15,092 --> 00:10:16,267 you can go. 200 00:10:18,661 --> 00:10:22,056 Diana, get Bob Haldeman for me. 201 00:10:22,143 --> 00:10:26,756 I think I may potentially know how to charm the snake. 202 00:10:26,887 --> 00:10:28,473 - I think I know a guy. - You know a guy? 203 00:10:28,497 --> 00:10:29,672 - I know a guy. - Oh. 204 00:10:29,803 --> 00:10:32,501 Bud Krogh's guy, Gordon... something. 205 00:10:32,632 --> 00:10:34,198 H-h-he'd be perfect 206 00:10:34,329 --> 00:10:36,679 for an intelligence-gathering operation of this scope. 207 00:10:36,810 --> 00:10:39,900 He's high logistical savvy, genius-level IQ, Mensa type. 208 00:10:40,030 --> 00:10:42,467 - Sounds like our type. - Liddy. Gordon Liddy. 209 00:10:42,598 --> 00:10:44,426 That's his name, uh, Gordon Liddy. 210 00:10:44,556 --> 00:10:46,515 If you were to hire him, 211 00:10:46,646 --> 00:10:49,649 say, as a general counsel... 212 00:10:51,476 --> 00:10:53,478 I could get him settled in. 213 00:10:53,565 --> 00:10:55,306 Show him the ropes. 214 00:10:55,437 --> 00:10:59,310 And I could answer any... 215 00:10:59,441 --> 00:11:03,488 election-compliance questions that he might have. 216 00:11:08,189 --> 00:11:10,408 He's good, isn't he? Didn't I say he's good? 217 00:11:10,539 --> 00:11:12,236 Mr. Mitchell? 218 00:11:12,367 --> 00:11:14,064 I have your wife on the phone. 219 00:11:14,195 --> 00:11:15,476 She says she's about to go into a magazine interview. 220 00:11:15,500 --> 00:11:17,111 Sick... Okay, get the fuck out. 221 00:11:17,241 --> 00:11:18,392 What the two of you still doing here? 222 00:11:18,416 --> 00:11:19,679 - Yes, sir.. - Go. Go, go. 223 00:11:19,809 --> 00:11:22,333 Uh, thank you. Thank you, sir. 224 00:11:22,464 --> 00:11:24,466 Martha marshmallow. 225 00:11:24,596 --> 00:11:26,468 What's this I hear about an interview? 226 00:11:26,598 --> 00:11:27,991 Hey, Dean, Dean! 227 00:11:28,122 --> 00:11:29,601 Hold on. One more thing. 228 00:11:29,689 --> 00:11:32,387 We're gonna want, um, your, uh, Liddy friend 229 00:11:32,517 --> 00:11:34,781 to wrangle up a little presentation for the group, 230 00:11:34,911 --> 00:11:36,608 just a run-through of potential... 231 00:11:36,739 --> 00:11:38,349 Martha, you are not listening... 232 00:11:38,436 --> 00:11:40,917 intelligence gathering, you-you know, 233 00:11:41,004 --> 00:11:43,180 - Espionage targets. - Right. 234 00:11:43,311 --> 00:11:44,418 So, uh, next Thursday morning? Is that okay? 235 00:11:44,442 --> 00:11:45,966 Next Thursday? 236 00:11:46,096 --> 00:11:47,421 It's a little tight, I know, but Mitchell, 237 00:11:47,445 --> 00:11:51,275 he's stretched so thin with the, you know, wife. 238 00:11:51,362 --> 00:11:52,668 I've told you, no solo interviews 239 00:11:52,799 --> 00:11:55,279 that haven't gone through the campaign. 240 00:11:55,410 --> 00:11:57,847 - M-Martha, what did I tell you? - So Thursday? 241 00:11:57,978 --> 00:11:59,806 Hmm, yeah. Oh, absolutely. No problem. 242 00:11:59,936 --> 00:12:01,808 Terrific. Terrific, Deano! Fabulous. 243 00:12:01,938 --> 00:12:03,461 Martha? 244 00:12:03,592 --> 00:12:04,767 Martha! 245 00:12:06,943 --> 00:12:08,858 Right there. 246 00:12:11,252 --> 00:12:12,993 Oh, why, thank you, dear. 247 00:12:13,123 --> 00:12:14,971 And could you please get a martini for Ms. McLendon? 248 00:12:14,995 --> 00:12:16,736 Oh, no. No, thank you. 249 00:12:16,823 --> 00:12:18,409 I-I don't usually drink with my interview subjects. 250 00:12:18,433 --> 00:12:20,454 Mr. McCord here, he doesn't drink on the job either. 251 00:12:20,478 --> 00:12:23,003 I don't trust him one bit. 252 00:12:23,133 --> 00:12:24,831 Uh, with a twist. 253 00:12:24,961 --> 00:12:26,441 - Mm-hmm. - Thank you. 254 00:12:26,571 --> 00:12:27,747 Now, where were we? 255 00:12:27,877 --> 00:12:29,357 Uh, well, I was ask... 256 00:12:29,487 --> 00:12:32,882 Oh, have I shown you my vases? They're Chinese. 257 00:12:33,013 --> 00:12:35,319 Yes. Uh, I was asking if there's any truth 258 00:12:35,450 --> 00:12:37,452 to the talk that your ease with the press 259 00:12:37,582 --> 00:12:39,212 has soured your relationship with the president. 260 00:12:39,236 --> 00:12:40,977 A vicious rumor. 261 00:12:41,108 --> 00:12:44,067 I am the one who introduced Dick to my husband. 262 00:12:44,198 --> 00:12:46,722 So there's no concern that you're overshadowing Nixon? 263 00:12:46,853 --> 00:12:49,029 You make me sound like an old oak tree. 264 00:12:49,116 --> 00:12:51,466 Would you ask such a question to Kissinger? 265 00:12:51,596 --> 00:12:53,033 With all due respect, 266 00:12:53,163 --> 00:12:55,296 Kissinger doesn't have a 76% name recognition 267 00:12:55,426 --> 00:12:56,776 with American families, you do. 268 00:12:56,863 --> 00:12:59,039 Well, someone should tell that to Pat Nixon. 269 00:12:59,169 --> 00:13:02,172 She has been double-booking our events to make a point. 270 00:13:02,303 --> 00:13:04,740 Just this week, I had to reschedule a fundraiser 271 00:13:04,871 --> 00:13:08,178 just to satisfy her lust for the spotlight. 272 00:13:08,309 --> 00:13:10,093 Right on. 273 00:13:10,224 --> 00:13:13,183 Let's get the vase in the frame now and the portrait. 274 00:13:16,926 --> 00:13:18,275 This won't be the first time 275 00:13:18,406 --> 00:13:20,046 I've had to be glamorous under my husband. 276 00:13:21,626 --> 00:13:23,411 Uh, Mrs. Mitchell, just because I write 277 00:13:23,541 --> 00:13:24,736 for the Ladies' Home Journal doesn't mean 278 00:13:24,760 --> 00:13:26,762 that this isn't a real interview. 279 00:13:26,849 --> 00:13:29,678 A couple months ago, you spoke out against the war. 280 00:13:29,765 --> 00:13:31,767 And I'm wondering if your husband 281 00:13:31,898 --> 00:13:33,116 or the president has... 282 00:13:33,247 --> 00:13:35,640 Oh, you spoil me. 283 00:13:35,771 --> 00:13:37,947 Look at that. Thank you. 284 00:13:38,078 --> 00:13:39,383 There you are. 285 00:13:39,514 --> 00:13:41,298 Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. 286 00:13:42,996 --> 00:13:45,650 Winnie... May I call you Winnie? 287 00:13:45,781 --> 00:13:47,652 - Sure. - You want to know why 288 00:13:47,739 --> 00:13:49,698 I've made these comments against the war? 289 00:13:49,785 --> 00:13:52,092 Well, it's because my own boy, Jay, 290 00:13:52,222 --> 00:13:54,007 is over there in that godforsaken jungle 291 00:13:54,137 --> 00:13:55,791 fighting for his life as we speak, 292 00:13:55,878 --> 00:13:58,489 surrounded by men who are trying to kill him. 293 00:13:58,576 --> 00:14:00,970 Do you know what that's like? 294 00:14:01,101 --> 00:14:04,191 Just constantly worried that he might not make it home? 295 00:14:08,369 --> 00:14:10,066 Oh, dear. 296 00:14:10,197 --> 00:14:11,459 Who is it for you? 297 00:14:11,589 --> 00:14:14,418 My little brother. He's... 298 00:14:14,549 --> 00:14:17,204 I see. 299 00:14:17,334 --> 00:14:19,206 We are empathetic creatures. 300 00:14:19,336 --> 00:14:20,642 Yes. 301 00:14:20,772 --> 00:14:23,297 Now, some people see that as a weakness. 302 00:14:23,427 --> 00:14:26,561 But I decided long ago that I will say how I feel. 303 00:14:26,691 --> 00:14:28,084 And if that does not conform 304 00:14:28,215 --> 00:14:29,825 to the president's message, so be it. 305 00:14:29,956 --> 00:14:31,556 If that gets me banned off Air Force One, 306 00:14:31,653 --> 00:14:33,176 I will fly commercial. 307 00:14:39,139 --> 00:14:40,836 So you were banned from Air Force One? 308 00:14:40,967 --> 00:14:44,361 - Oh, you're good. - I-I do want to hear that story. 309 00:14:44,448 --> 00:14:45,797 You caught that. 310 00:14:45,928 --> 00:14:47,427 We can get back to the real questions, but... 311 00:14:47,451 --> 00:14:48,452 Martha? 312 00:14:48,583 --> 00:14:49,976 Where are you? 313 00:14:50,106 --> 00:14:51,823 We're in the sitting room, cupcake. Put that away. 314 00:14:51,847 --> 00:14:53,631 McCord! Where's McCord? 315 00:14:53,762 --> 00:14:55,677 Yes, sir. 316 00:14:55,807 --> 00:14:57,897 Would you kindly escort these people 317 00:14:57,984 --> 00:15:00,073 the fuck out of my home? 318 00:15:00,160 --> 00:15:00,856 - Mm-hmm. - Oh, I'm so sorry. 319 00:15:00,987 --> 00:15:02,684 That's okay. 320 00:15:02,814 --> 00:15:03,922 Thank you for coming. Thank you for coming. 321 00:15:03,946 --> 00:15:05,054 - Thank you. - Sorry about this. 322 00:15:05,078 --> 00:15:06,122 No, thank you so much. 323 00:15:15,001 --> 00:15:16,480 Have you gone insane? 324 00:15:16,611 --> 00:15:19,005 I told you, no more print interviews. 325 00:15:19,135 --> 00:15:21,355 Oh, it's a ladies' magazine. 326 00:15:21,485 --> 00:15:23,724 They were asking me about the curtains, for Christ's sake. 327 00:15:23,748 --> 00:15:25,359 Oh, I know exactly what you're doing. 328 00:15:25,489 --> 00:15:27,467 You're just trying to take the spotlight from Pat Nixon. 329 00:15:27,491 --> 00:15:29,580 I would never. Let me do this. 330 00:15:29,711 --> 00:15:31,887 Do... do you really think that she, in a million years, 331 00:15:32,018 --> 00:15:33,541 would plan her concert 332 00:15:33,671 --> 00:15:35,084 just to be on the same night as your party? 333 00:15:35,108 --> 00:15:36,936 It's a fundraiser, 334 00:15:37,023 --> 00:15:39,590 for her husband's campaign, by the way. 335 00:15:39,721 --> 00:15:41,810 And, yes, I think she absolutely meant to do it. 336 00:15:41,941 --> 00:15:43,420 Oh, it was a misunderstanding. 337 00:15:43,551 --> 00:15:45,901 The Bay of Pigs was a misunderstanding. 338 00:15:46,032 --> 00:15:47,424 This is an encroachment. 339 00:15:47,555 --> 00:15:49,035 Oh, for fuck's sake. 340 00:15:50,645 --> 00:15:53,735 I had to reorganize everything. 341 00:15:53,822 --> 00:15:56,738 The caterer, the flowers, 342 00:15:56,825 --> 00:15:58,609 all because you don't know how to stand up 343 00:15:58,740 --> 00:16:00,220 to your boss' wife. 344 00:16:02,178 --> 00:16:04,702 At least Pat Nixon knows how to support her husband. 345 00:16:04,833 --> 00:16:08,054 That's not what I heard. 346 00:16:08,184 --> 00:16:10,099 Maybe if she stopped talking behind my back, 347 00:16:10,186 --> 00:16:13,668 she might find a more fruitful use for that mouth of hers. 348 00:16:16,279 --> 00:16:19,239 Are you implying that the first lady 349 00:16:19,326 --> 00:16:22,242 isn't blowing her husband enough? 350 00:16:22,372 --> 00:16:23,460 What? 351 00:16:23,591 --> 00:16:25,549 No! You're disgusting. 352 00:16:25,680 --> 00:16:26,986 Oh. 353 00:16:27,116 --> 00:16:28,683 She wouldn't know where to start. 354 00:16:30,772 --> 00:16:31,860 But I do. 355 00:16:33,731 --> 00:16:35,820 I know right where to sta... 356 00:16:35,951 --> 00:16:37,909 Okay, stop it. Stop it. 357 00:16:38,040 --> 00:16:39,433 Don't I? 358 00:16:39,563 --> 00:16:41,063 Stop it, Martha. I'm really angry this time. 359 00:16:41,087 --> 00:16:42,087 Oh, all right. 360 00:16:45,134 --> 00:16:46,396 I'm sorry. 361 00:16:51,053 --> 00:16:52,881 How can I make it up to you? 362 00:17:02,847 --> 00:17:05,067 That'll be enough. You can stand down. 363 00:17:05,154 --> 00:17:06,503 Yes, sir. 364 00:17:17,906 --> 00:17:19,342 Mm. 365 00:17:19,473 --> 00:17:20,553 I thought he'd never leave. 366 00:17:23,390 --> 00:17:25,827 - Welcome home. - Mm. 367 00:17:37,273 --> 00:17:40,276 He should be done with his call any moment now, Mr. Liddy. 368 00:17:40,407 --> 00:17:41,973 Are you sure you don't need anything? 369 00:17:42,061 --> 00:17:43,497 No, thank you. 370 00:17:45,716 --> 00:17:47,327 What's your name? 371 00:17:47,457 --> 00:17:49,285 Uh, Linda. 372 00:17:51,853 --> 00:17:54,551 Gordon. I'm so sorry to keep you waiting. 373 00:17:54,638 --> 00:17:56,529 Great to meet you. Finally put a face to the name. 374 00:17:56,553 --> 00:17:58,555 You ready? Let's walk. 375 00:18:02,820 --> 00:18:04,431 These pitches always wind me up. 376 00:18:04,561 --> 00:18:06,389 You nervous? 377 00:18:06,520 --> 00:18:08,522 Oh, I don't experience human neuroses. 378 00:18:10,698 --> 00:18:13,527 I actually feed off these moments. 379 00:18:13,657 --> 00:18:17,357 There's a wild and manic energy to them, animal energy. 380 00:18:19,402 --> 00:18:20,402 Hmm. 381 00:18:22,927 --> 00:18:27,149 Ouch. What happened there? 382 00:18:27,236 --> 00:18:30,761 I was sourcing operational recruits... 383 00:18:30,892 --> 00:18:33,808 Cubans. 384 00:18:33,938 --> 00:18:38,073 I needed to show them that I am what the Spanish call macho. 385 00:18:38,204 --> 00:18:42,077 So I placed my hand into the... 386 00:18:42,208 --> 00:18:44,471 The short flame of a candle and held it there 387 00:18:44,601 --> 00:18:46,386 until the room smelled of roasting flesh. 388 00:18:48,910 --> 00:18:51,565 Only then were they willing to call me their jefe. 389 00:18:56,483 --> 00:18:58,615 Gentlemen, as you know, 390 00:18:58,702 --> 00:19:01,923 our president faces a daunting campaign season. 391 00:19:02,010 --> 00:19:05,796 For that reason, I've devised a plan for covert operations, 392 00:19:05,927 --> 00:19:07,447 the likes of which our electoral system 393 00:19:07,494 --> 00:19:08,582 has never seen. 394 00:19:10,192 --> 00:19:11,585 I present you... 395 00:19:14,588 --> 00:19:16,285 Operation Gemstone. 396 00:19:17,982 --> 00:19:19,810 The Gemstone, 397 00:19:19,897 --> 00:19:22,944 brilliant, sparkling... 398 00:19:23,031 --> 00:19:25,425 impervious. 399 00:19:25,555 --> 00:19:28,167 I have crafted an integrated strategy 400 00:19:28,297 --> 00:19:31,953 meant to function seamlessly in enemy territoire. 401 00:19:32,083 --> 00:19:33,302 Phase one... 402 00:19:34,999 --> 00:19:37,001 Operation Quartz. 403 00:19:37,088 --> 00:19:39,395 - A covert manipulation... - Oh, quartz... 404 00:19:39,526 --> 00:19:41,876 Uh, quartz is actually a mineral. 405 00:19:42,006 --> 00:19:43,225 Excuse me? 406 00:19:43,356 --> 00:19:44,636 Uh, quartz is actually a mineral. 407 00:19:44,748 --> 00:19:45,967 It's not a gemsto... 408 00:19:46,097 --> 00:19:48,839 I took a little geology at uh, Williams, 409 00:19:48,970 --> 00:19:50,624 which I briefly attended. 410 00:19:50,754 --> 00:19:53,670 But I-I just love rocks. Please proceed. 411 00:19:53,801 --> 00:19:57,239 Operation Quartz... 412 00:19:57,370 --> 00:19:59,459 a covert manipulation 413 00:19:59,589 --> 00:20:01,722 of the Democrats' outer circle. 414 00:20:01,852 --> 00:20:05,291 We will round up their fringe activist leaders 415 00:20:05,421 --> 00:20:10,034 and export them to black sites deep in the heart of Mexico. 416 00:20:10,165 --> 00:20:14,474 Each capture will slice a viper from Medusa's crown. 417 00:20:14,604 --> 00:20:18,304 Their leaderless ranks will wither away. 418 00:20:18,434 --> 00:20:22,177 Is that "export" as in kidnap? 419 00:20:22,308 --> 00:20:25,615 "Forced rendition" is the optimal descriptor. 420 00:20:25,746 --> 00:20:27,617 Next up... 421 00:20:27,704 --> 00:20:30,141 Operation Ruby... 422 00:20:30,229 --> 00:20:33,493 The blood-red gem of a duplicitous woman. 423 00:20:33,623 --> 00:20:37,627 The Democrats are weak, their women cold. 424 00:20:37,714 --> 00:20:40,369 We will secure a pleasure craft 425 00:20:40,500 --> 00:20:42,806 wired for sight and sound 426 00:20:42,937 --> 00:20:45,461 and sailed to the Democratic National Convention, 427 00:20:45,592 --> 00:20:47,942 where we will capture their officials 428 00:20:48,072 --> 00:20:51,598 enjoying the company of women trained in the erotic arts, 429 00:20:51,728 --> 00:20:54,078 some of the finest in the country. 430 00:20:54,165 --> 00:20:58,257 You want to film... 431 00:20:58,387 --> 00:21:01,477 Democratic officials... 432 00:21:01,608 --> 00:21:04,524 on a boat with hookers? 433 00:21:06,874 --> 00:21:11,008 Call it a passion play for opposition leverage, sir. 434 00:21:11,095 --> 00:21:14,098 Just out of curiosity, how many of these gemstones 435 00:21:14,229 --> 00:21:16,100 are we going to be reviewing today? 436 00:21:16,231 --> 00:21:18,233 Eleven. With four subparts. 437 00:21:18,364 --> 00:21:20,583 And, uh, how much is this all gonna cost? 438 00:21:20,670 --> 00:21:21,889 We're looking at a price point 439 00:21:22,019 --> 00:21:24,065 between $50,000 and $100,000 apiece. 440 00:21:24,152 --> 00:21:25,980 Right. Just finger math... 441 00:21:26,110 --> 00:21:29,853 That's uh, way over budget, sir, astonishingly so. 442 00:21:29,984 --> 00:21:31,309 And that will not be a problem, young man. 443 00:21:31,333 --> 00:21:33,596 Oh, good. 444 00:21:33,683 --> 00:21:35,182 I do hope you gentlemen have had a chance 445 00:21:35,206 --> 00:21:36,227 to brush up on your II Corinthians, 446 00:21:36,251 --> 00:21:39,863 because, well... 447 00:21:39,994 --> 00:21:41,822 this is where we get to play God. 448 00:21:44,128 --> 00:21:45,956 My pitches are too ambitious? 449 00:21:49,133 --> 00:21:53,181 Who in the fresh hell does Mitchell think he is? 450 00:21:53,312 --> 00:21:56,837 You see the way he looked at me when all was said and done? 451 00:21:56,967 --> 00:21:58,186 Uh, no. I didn't catch that. 452 00:21:58,273 --> 00:21:59,840 I'll tell you, like a rat at his feet. 453 00:21:59,927 --> 00:22:03,713 It was like vomit. That's how he looked at me. 454 00:22:03,844 --> 00:22:06,977 You know, t-those guys can be very indelicate, uh, sometimes. 455 00:22:07,108 --> 00:22:09,110 I wouldn't take it too-too personally. 456 00:22:09,240 --> 00:22:11,852 And Magruder... That little pissant... 457 00:22:13,375 --> 00:22:16,509 "Quartz is a mineral." 458 00:22:16,639 --> 00:22:18,032 He's lucky I didn't snap his spine 459 00:22:18,162 --> 00:22:19,294 right in the fucking room. 460 00:22:23,080 --> 00:22:24,386 Um... 461 00:22:29,130 --> 00:22:30,261 What did you think? 462 00:22:30,392 --> 00:22:31,741 Huh? 463 00:22:31,872 --> 00:22:33,569 Of the pitch, what did you think? 464 00:22:33,656 --> 00:22:36,355 You can tell me. I'm... I can take it. 465 00:22:38,618 --> 00:22:42,099 What did I think? I-I-I-I-I really liked it. 466 00:22:42,230 --> 00:22:45,320 I-I knew it! 467 00:22:45,451 --> 00:22:47,411 I saw your body language in the room, and I knew... 468 00:22:47,540 --> 00:22:48,715 I knew Dean liked it. 469 00:22:48,845 --> 00:22:50,194 What was your favorite part? 470 00:22:50,325 --> 00:22:51,892 My favorite? 471 00:22:52,022 --> 00:22:54,895 Um, gosh, you know, th... T-there were a lot of elements. 472 00:22:55,025 --> 00:22:56,462 You know, I loved the... 473 00:22:56,592 --> 00:22:58,246 T-the cheerful font was very interesting. 474 00:22:58,377 --> 00:22:59,900 I did the font. 475 00:23:00,030 --> 00:23:01,641 - Great, uh... - I came up with the font. 476 00:23:01,771 --> 00:23:04,252 Yeah, look, let me pitch you something. 477 00:23:08,691 --> 00:23:12,652 How about you and I never talk about this ever again, 478 00:23:12,782 --> 00:23:13,827 ideally? 479 00:23:20,094 --> 00:23:22,139 Okay, compadre. 480 00:23:22,270 --> 00:23:23,402 Enough said. 481 00:23:27,275 --> 00:23:29,016 I do. I really like this one. 482 00:23:29,146 --> 00:23:31,235 I think that's nice, dear. 483 00:23:34,978 --> 00:23:36,850 ♪ Let's fly away ♪ 484 00:23:38,895 --> 00:23:41,376 ♪ And find a land that's warm and tropic ♪ 485 00:23:41,463 --> 00:23:42,638 We are in for a night. 486 00:23:42,769 --> 00:23:44,379 You. 487 00:23:44,510 --> 00:23:47,556 Whenever he has on tails, this happens. 488 00:23:47,687 --> 00:23:50,124 It does. Whenever you put on your tails... 489 00:23:50,211 --> 00:23:52,474 it makes you crazy. 490 00:23:52,605 --> 00:23:56,957 - It's Daddy dancing time. - Aw... 491 00:23:57,131 --> 00:23:59,089 ♪ And find a land that's so provincial ♪ 492 00:23:59,263 --> 00:24:03,311 ♪ We'll never hear what Walter Winchell ♪ 493 00:24:03,485 --> 00:24:05,226 ♪ Might be forced to say ♪ 494 00:24:05,356 --> 00:24:08,229 I need a zip here when you're done, Fred Astaire. 495 00:24:08,359 --> 00:24:10,536 Yes, ma'am. I think we can hear mother now. 496 00:24:13,756 --> 00:24:15,366 Shimmy it up. 497 00:24:15,454 --> 00:24:17,978 Ooh. 498 00:24:18,108 --> 00:24:20,502 There it is. Look at that neck. 499 00:24:20,633 --> 00:24:22,243 There's a tiny little hook. 500 00:24:22,330 --> 00:24:24,375 Now, that's a neck. That's... 501 00:24:24,506 --> 00:24:26,203 that's a neck I'd like to neck. 502 00:24:29,250 --> 00:24:30,991 I can't get that... 503 00:24:33,472 --> 00:24:34,560 - Lovely. - Love you. 504 00:25:04,764 --> 00:25:08,855 ♪ I'll make your life sublime ♪ 505 00:25:08,985 --> 00:25:10,920 Pat sure has made a statement seating us back here. 506 00:25:10,944 --> 00:25:12,467 I can't see a thing. 507 00:25:12,598 --> 00:25:14,991 And, honey, you know it was no accident. 508 00:25:15,165 --> 00:25:16,471 ♪ I'll take up all your time ♪ 509 00:25:16,645 --> 00:25:20,649 ♪ Compromising you ♪ 510 00:25:20,823 --> 00:25:22,129 ♪ Let's not delay... ♪ 511 00:25:22,259 --> 00:25:24,000 And now, ladies and gentlemen, 512 00:25:24,087 --> 00:25:25,915 the President and Mrs. Nixon present 513 00:25:26,046 --> 00:25:27,700 the Ray Conniff Singers. 514 00:25:30,267 --> 00:25:32,269 ♪ New York is not for me ♪ 515 00:25:35,011 --> 00:25:37,579 ♪ Let's fly away ♪ 516 00:25:44,151 --> 00:25:45,587 President Nixon, 517 00:25:45,718 --> 00:25:47,546 stop bombing human beings, 518 00:25:47,676 --> 00:25:49,809 animals, and vegetation. 519 00:25:49,939 --> 00:25:51,288 You go to church on Sundays, 520 00:25:51,375 --> 00:25:52,725 and you pray to Jesus Christ. 521 00:25:52,855 --> 00:25:54,683 If Jesus Christ were here tonight, 522 00:25:54,814 --> 00:25:57,207 you would not dare drop another bomb. 523 00:25:57,338 --> 00:26:00,080 Bless the Berrigans and bless Daniel Ellsberg. 524 00:26:00,210 --> 00:26:01,734 Get her off the stage! 525 00:26:13,049 --> 00:26:14,790 Sorry about that, Mr. President. 526 00:26:14,921 --> 00:26:17,532 Looks like someone needs to go back to finishing school. 527 00:26:17,663 --> 00:26:20,056 Let's move along, shall we? 528 00:26:20,187 --> 00:26:21,187 Ladies... 529 00:26:29,457 --> 00:26:30,589 Maureen? 530 00:26:30,719 --> 00:26:32,155 Hey, John Dean. 531 00:26:32,242 --> 00:26:33,896 - Hi. - Hi. I am so sorry I'm late. 532 00:26:34,027 --> 00:26:35,289 That's fine. 533 00:26:35,419 --> 00:26:36,899 It's not some first-date power move. 534 00:26:37,030 --> 00:26:38,485 You know, things have been nuts at work... 535 00:26:38,509 --> 00:26:40,309 - You know what? It's Mo. - Traffic and... what? 536 00:26:40,381 --> 00:26:42,035 You can just call me Mo. 537 00:26:42,165 --> 00:26:44,056 Uh, the dating service suggested that I use Maureen... 538 00:26:44,080 --> 00:26:45,778 Oh, Mo... 539 00:26:45,908 --> 00:26:46,972 'cause I guess they thought people would make... 540 00:26:46,996 --> 00:26:48,147 - Like the Stooges? - a Stooges joke. 541 00:26:48,171 --> 00:26:48,998 What? Oh. 542 00:26:49,085 --> 00:26:50,957 So sorry. 543 00:26:51,044 --> 00:26:53,164 You're doing the Stooges... I didn't... No, I-I remember. 544 00:26:54,700 --> 00:26:56,310 - Good. - Yes. 545 00:26:56,397 --> 00:26:59,226 - Stooges. - Um, so... 546 00:26:59,356 --> 00:27:02,098 Hi, hello. How are you know? Now, I'm gonna give you these. 547 00:27:02,229 --> 00:27:04,405 It's for the, uh, Dijon Porsche out front. 548 00:27:04,535 --> 00:27:06,233 Now, there's not a scratch on it right now. 549 00:27:06,363 --> 00:27:08,037 And that's how I want to find her when I come back, okay? 550 00:27:08,061 --> 00:27:09,647 I'm gonna take special care of you, okay? 551 00:27:09,671 --> 00:27:11,760 - Mm-hmm. - Thank you so much. 552 00:27:11,847 --> 00:27:13,109 Your table's ready. 553 00:27:13,240 --> 00:27:15,938 All right. Thank you. 554 00:27:16,025 --> 00:27:19,855 Mele Kalikimaka. That's the thing to say. 555 00:27:19,986 --> 00:27:22,336 In blood, chained to the door of County Animal Control, 556 00:27:22,466 --> 00:27:24,643 and I am screaming, "No more pets have to die!" 557 00:27:24,773 --> 00:27:25,948 I'm sorry. 558 00:27:26,079 --> 00:27:27,428 "No more pets have to die." 559 00:27:27,558 --> 00:27:30,823 And then 20 minutes later, I, uh... 560 00:27:30,910 --> 00:27:32,868 I find out I-I have the wrong address, 561 00:27:32,955 --> 00:27:34,585 and I am chained to the dentist's office next door. 562 00:27:34,609 --> 00:27:36,611 No! 563 00:27:36,742 --> 00:27:38,526 I guess I was a-a young man with conviction. 564 00:27:38,657 --> 00:27:40,484 So what can I say? 565 00:27:40,615 --> 00:27:42,071 You know, it's embarrassing to even think about it. 566 00:27:42,095 --> 00:27:44,053 No, no, it's so cute. 567 00:27:48,449 --> 00:27:51,887 You know, I'll be honest, at the start of the night, I... 568 00:27:52,018 --> 00:27:53,410 I thought I was in real trouble. 569 00:27:53,541 --> 00:27:56,805 Oh. Why is that? 570 00:27:56,936 --> 00:27:58,720 Well, I don't want to burst your bubble, 571 00:27:58,807 --> 00:28:02,506 but you don't exactly make the best first impression. 572 00:28:02,637 --> 00:28:04,334 - Are you serious? - Yeah. 573 00:28:04,465 --> 00:28:06,859 You seemed like you were gonna be a huge piece of shit. 574 00:28:06,989 --> 00:28:08,948 Oh. 575 00:28:09,035 --> 00:28:12,647 Well, that's funny, because you kind of seemed 576 00:28:12,778 --> 00:28:14,475 stuck up and weird. 577 00:28:14,605 --> 00:28:16,216 No, I didn't. 578 00:28:16,303 --> 00:28:18,305 You're right. 579 00:28:18,435 --> 00:28:21,177 You seemed great from the beginning. 580 00:28:24,398 --> 00:28:25,747 So what's a stewardess from L.A. 581 00:28:25,878 --> 00:28:28,184 doing on a-a D.C. dating service? 582 00:28:28,315 --> 00:28:30,404 I'm doing research. 583 00:28:30,491 --> 00:28:34,060 I'm thinking of doing some writing. 584 00:28:34,190 --> 00:28:35,888 You want to be a journalist. 585 00:28:36,018 --> 00:28:37,541 - Mm. - No. 586 00:28:37,672 --> 00:28:39,369 Someone didn't read my profile too closely. 587 00:28:39,500 --> 00:28:41,458 - Well, I... - I want to write novels. 588 00:28:41,589 --> 00:28:42,633 - Oh. - Romantic novels. 589 00:28:42,764 --> 00:28:43,939 Oh? 590 00:28:44,026 --> 00:28:45,854 Stop it. It's nothing smutty. 591 00:28:45,985 --> 00:28:47,465 No, no, no, that's... That's fantastic. 592 00:28:47,595 --> 00:28:49,466 But, um... 593 00:28:49,597 --> 00:28:50,946 why D.C.? 594 00:28:51,077 --> 00:28:52,774 I mean, people come here for depth... 595 00:28:52,905 --> 00:28:53,949 No, I really like it here. 596 00:28:54,080 --> 00:28:55,734 - You do? - I-I don't know. 597 00:28:55,864 --> 00:28:56,735 People come here to make a difference in the world. 598 00:28:56,865 --> 00:28:58,649 - Well... - It's nice. 599 00:28:58,780 --> 00:29:00,173 I mean, God, I'm not naive. 600 00:29:00,303 --> 00:29:02,697 I know, everybody has to make compromises. 601 00:29:02,784 --> 00:29:06,309 And, well, you probably know that better than anyone. 602 00:29:06,440 --> 00:29:07,484 What do you mean by that? 603 00:29:09,008 --> 00:29:10,574 Come on. You know... 604 00:29:12,968 --> 00:29:14,361 I'm... I'm not sure I do. 605 00:29:14,491 --> 00:29:16,189 I mean, um, I-it just must be difficult 606 00:29:16,319 --> 00:29:17,581 working for a man like that. 607 00:29:17,712 --> 00:29:19,018 A man like what? 608 00:29:19,148 --> 00:29:21,890 A man like Richard Nixon. 609 00:29:21,977 --> 00:29:24,414 He's just a little bit of a liar, don't you think? 610 00:29:24,545 --> 00:29:26,286 Oh, right. 611 00:29:26,416 --> 00:29:29,376 And you think LBJ was some kind of Boy Scout? 612 00:29:29,506 --> 00:29:31,639 Well, Nixon really takes it to a whole other level. 613 00:29:31,726 --> 00:29:33,467 How so? 614 00:29:33,597 --> 00:29:35,686 Uh, the stuff about ending the war, for one thing. 615 00:29:35,817 --> 00:29:37,142 He's drawn down troop levels by two thirds 616 00:29:37,166 --> 00:29:38,602 since he's been in office. 617 00:29:38,733 --> 00:29:40,363 I saw on the news he's increased bombings. 618 00:29:40,387 --> 00:29:42,737 Did the news also mention that he signed Title IX 619 00:29:42,868 --> 00:29:44,391 or established 620 00:29:44,521 --> 00:29:45,000 the Environmental Protection Agency? 621 00:29:45,087 --> 00:29:46,959 Wow. 622 00:29:47,046 --> 00:29:48,197 You've really talked yourself into this, haven't you? 623 00:29:48,221 --> 00:29:49,918 Talked myself into what? 624 00:29:51,093 --> 00:29:52,093 Um... 625 00:29:54,401 --> 00:29:55,924 Maybe this wasn't 626 00:29:56,011 --> 00:29:57,510 the best topic of conversation to bring up... 627 00:29:57,534 --> 00:29:58,860 - No, no, no, no, no, no.. - We don't have... John... 628 00:29:58,884 --> 00:30:00,252 What about you? What... what about you? 629 00:30:00,276 --> 00:30:01,364 What about me? 630 00:30:01,495 --> 00:30:02,713 Oh, come on. 631 00:30:02,844 --> 00:30:04,237 Uh... 632 00:30:04,367 --> 00:30:06,195 You're just like all your liberal friends. 633 00:30:06,326 --> 00:30:08,415 You... you playact like you want to save the world, 634 00:30:08,502 --> 00:30:10,175 when all you really care about is finding a guy 635 00:30:10,199 --> 00:30:11,719 with enough bread to pick up the check. 636 00:30:19,513 --> 00:30:22,211 Hoped you guys saved room for the Baked Alaska. 637 00:30:25,867 --> 00:30:27,427 I must have been drunk when I said that. 638 00:30:27,477 --> 00:30:29,349 Now I've got Dick calling me 639 00:30:29,479 --> 00:30:31,159 'cause he's got Kissinger up his ass again. 640 00:30:32,656 --> 00:30:34,310 I should have said no to Dick 641 00:30:34,441 --> 00:30:37,531 the second he asked me to come play politics out here. 642 00:30:37,661 --> 00:30:40,142 Should have stayed in New York. Could have kept my practice. 643 00:30:40,229 --> 00:30:43,015 Hmm. We'd still have our house Upstate. 644 00:30:43,145 --> 00:30:44,886 Remember when we used to drink 645 00:30:45,017 --> 00:30:46,453 a whole bottle of blackberry wine 646 00:30:46,583 --> 00:30:48,672 and watch the moon rise over the bay? 647 00:30:48,759 --> 00:30:50,892 - I miss those nights. - Mm. 648 00:30:50,979 --> 00:30:53,721 I've got an idea. 649 00:30:53,852 --> 00:30:54,959 Let's catch a flight somewhere, 650 00:30:54,983 --> 00:30:58,508 we'll go to China, India, New York. 651 00:30:58,639 --> 00:31:00,597 Dick needs me, honey bear. You know that. 652 00:31:00,728 --> 00:31:02,469 The man's an emotional wreck. 653 00:31:02,599 --> 00:31:04,479 Without me, he wouldn't get through to November. 654 00:31:07,256 --> 00:31:09,911 Of course. Don't know what I was thinking. 655 00:31:22,402 --> 00:31:23,577 Hello? 656 00:31:23,707 --> 00:31:25,187 Winnie, honey. 657 00:31:25,274 --> 00:31:26,556 You won't believe the night I've had, 658 00:31:26,580 --> 00:31:27,450 a protester crashed... 659 00:31:27,581 --> 00:31:29,670 Martha? 660 00:31:29,800 --> 00:31:30,821 The first lady's miserable social evening. 661 00:31:30,845 --> 00:31:32,499 Jesus, what time is it? 662 00:31:32,629 --> 00:31:34,980 Poor woman. They had to drag her right off the stage. 663 00:31:35,110 --> 00:31:36,982 How did you get my number? 664 00:31:37,112 --> 00:31:38,611 Of course my husband had to leave me alone the whole night 665 00:31:38,635 --> 00:31:40,048 'cause he's busy playing the middleman 666 00:31:40,072 --> 00:31:41,595 in this silly feud 667 00:31:41,725 --> 00:31:43,771 the president's got going with Henry. 668 00:31:43,902 --> 00:31:45,164 Henry? 669 00:31:45,251 --> 00:31:47,862 As in, like... 670 00:31:47,993 --> 00:31:49,472 Henry Kissinger? 671 00:31:49,603 --> 00:31:51,300 I really shouldn't say. 672 00:32:13,192 --> 00:32:15,846 Father. May I? 673 00:32:20,764 --> 00:32:23,158 Raymond, what are you doing up? 674 00:32:26,422 --> 00:32:28,381 I was having bad dreams again. 675 00:32:30,557 --> 00:32:32,298 Are you okay, Father? 676 00:32:32,428 --> 00:32:35,649 Had a little whoopsie today at work. 677 00:32:35,736 --> 00:32:37,651 What kind of whoopsie? 678 00:32:37,781 --> 00:32:41,350 Remember when you were in art class 679 00:32:41,481 --> 00:32:44,092 and Miss Grimmer caught you eating all the other kids' glue 680 00:32:44,223 --> 00:32:46,573 and all the other kids laughed at you? 681 00:32:47,748 --> 00:32:50,142 All the other kids laughed at me today, Raymond. 682 00:33:03,894 --> 00:33:05,853 Sometimes... 683 00:33:05,984 --> 00:33:09,291 when the other boys at school laugh at me... 684 00:33:09,422 --> 00:33:11,728 Mother says I should make friends with them. 685 00:33:11,859 --> 00:33:15,123 She says there are good ships 686 00:33:15,254 --> 00:33:16,907 and wood ships 687 00:33:17,038 --> 00:33:19,388 and ships that sail the sea, 688 00:33:19,519 --> 00:33:22,739 but the best ships are friendships. 689 00:33:48,591 --> 00:33:50,985 Linda, would you put in a call 690 00:33:51,116 --> 00:33:54,206 to, uh, ah, Harry Welch at the FAA? 691 00:33:54,293 --> 00:33:55,990 Have him send us any information 692 00:33:56,121 --> 00:33:58,993 he has on a registered flight attendant, Maureen Kane. 693 00:33:59,124 --> 00:34:00,844 Oh, and, uh, Liddy should be here any minute 694 00:34:00,951 --> 00:34:02,581 - for the meeting. - Uh, Liddy's already here. 695 00:34:02,605 --> 00:34:04,259 He arrived over a half hour ago. 696 00:34:04,346 --> 00:34:06,131 He's already here? Where is he? 697 00:34:06,218 --> 00:34:07,654 Mitchell's office. 698 00:34:07,784 --> 00:34:09,177 - Jesus. - You want me to go... 699 00:34:09,308 --> 00:34:10,874 I'm so sorry. 700 00:34:11,005 --> 00:34:12,180 Are they in there? 701 00:34:15,227 --> 00:34:16,750 Speak of the devil, and he doth appear. 702 00:34:16,837 --> 00:34:17,838 What's the matter, Dean? 703 00:34:17,968 --> 00:34:19,361 You look like you just got caught 704 00:34:19,492 --> 00:34:20,754 butt-fucking your sister. 705 00:34:20,884 --> 00:34:22,190 I don't have a-a sister, sir. 706 00:34:22,277 --> 00:34:23,931 Um... 707 00:34:24,062 --> 00:34:26,064 are we celebrating something? 708 00:34:26,194 --> 00:34:28,457 Wow, sharp as a tack. Tell him, Liddy. 709 00:34:28,544 --> 00:34:30,111 I ran into Mr. Mitchell this morning 710 00:34:30,242 --> 00:34:32,418 on the way into the office, and- 711 00:34:32,548 --> 00:34:34,985 I had a few rough ideas for pared-down operations... 712 00:34:35,116 --> 00:34:36,683 Sketches really. 713 00:34:36,813 --> 00:34:38,032 Ah, don't beat yourself up. 714 00:34:38,163 --> 00:34:39,599 We made some adjustments. 715 00:34:39,729 --> 00:34:41,427 It was all you, Mr. Mitchell. 716 00:34:41,557 --> 00:34:44,560 He helped me come up with a whole new operation plan. 717 00:34:44,647 --> 00:34:47,346 This man truly knows his tradecraft. 718 00:34:47,476 --> 00:34:51,741 Sir, are you sure it's wise to be, um... 719 00:34:51,872 --> 00:34:55,745 casually discussing illicit activities in your office? 720 00:34:55,832 --> 00:34:58,096 Teacher's here. Fun's over. 721 00:34:58,226 --> 00:34:59,271 Well, no. 722 00:35:00,620 --> 00:35:03,884 Gordo, fabulous work. 723 00:35:04,014 --> 00:35:06,234 Just, uh, talk to Jeb. 724 00:35:06,321 --> 00:35:08,149 He'll take care of the logistics with you. 725 00:35:08,280 --> 00:35:10,586 Thank you, sir. 726 00:35:10,673 --> 00:35:13,459 Well, whatever you told that chowderhead 727 00:35:13,589 --> 00:35:17,550 to get him to drop the James Bond act, it worked. 728 00:35:17,637 --> 00:35:20,901 Well, I just, uh, showed him how to be a team player, sir. 729 00:35:21,031 --> 00:35:24,165 Hmm. Tell you what... 730 00:35:24,252 --> 00:35:26,124 my wife is doing a campaign fundraiser 731 00:35:26,254 --> 00:35:28,126 at our house Saturday. 732 00:35:28,256 --> 00:35:30,171 Why don't you come by? 733 00:35:30,258 --> 00:35:32,478 You know? For all your hard work. 734 00:35:32,565 --> 00:35:34,132 I'd be honored, sir. 735 00:35:34,262 --> 00:35:36,221 And bring a date... Something nice on the eyes. 736 00:35:36,351 --> 00:35:37,787 Right. Okay. 737 00:35:51,758 --> 00:35:53,629 What the hell? 738 00:35:53,760 --> 00:35:55,936 Go, go, go. 739 00:35:56,066 --> 00:35:58,417 Mo. Hey. I can't believe it. 740 00:35:58,547 --> 00:36:00,090 I was just about to check in for my flight. 741 00:36:00,114 --> 00:36:01,526 And I was thinking, what are the odds 742 00:36:01,550 --> 00:36:02,950 I'd run into Mo Kane at the airport? 743 00:36:03,073 --> 00:36:04,727 And here you are. That is crazy. 744 00:36:04,858 --> 00:36:06,903 Huh, how did you find me? 745 00:36:07,034 --> 00:36:09,384 Well, I just... I saw you coming up the thing. 746 00:36:09,515 --> 00:36:11,604 - Where's your ticket? - Excuse me? 747 00:36:11,734 --> 00:36:13,103 You said you were checking in for your flight. 748 00:36:13,127 --> 00:36:14,476 You should have a ticket. 749 00:36:14,607 --> 00:36:16,348 Oh, right, ticket, um... 750 00:36:16,478 --> 00:36:17,914 That is a very good... 751 00:36:18,045 --> 00:36:20,265 Oh, you know, shoot, I must have thrown it 752 00:36:20,352 --> 00:36:21,875 in the trash with my food there. 753 00:36:21,962 --> 00:36:23,616 Um, I have to get a new one now. 754 00:36:23,746 --> 00:36:24,854 Do you know the lady? Maybe you can... 755 00:36:24,878 --> 00:36:26,009 You little psychopath. 756 00:36:26,140 --> 00:36:27,359 What? 757 00:36:27,489 --> 00:36:29,274 Did you call the FAA? 758 00:36:29,404 --> 00:36:30,971 Call the... 759 00:36:31,101 --> 00:36:33,582 No. What? No. 760 00:36:33,669 --> 00:36:35,410 Why would I... Why would I do that? 761 00:36:35,541 --> 00:36:36,846 To find out my flight schedule 762 00:36:36,977 --> 00:36:39,371 so you could manufacture a way to bump into me 763 00:36:39,501 --> 00:36:40,957 in the futile hope you could apologize your way 764 00:36:40,981 --> 00:36:42,200 into a second date. 765 00:36:45,507 --> 00:36:47,727 Has this... has this happened to you before? 766 00:36:47,857 --> 00:36:49,946 It's a pilot trick. 767 00:36:50,077 --> 00:36:52,397 I have to say, it's never felt quite so pathetic until now. 768 00:36:54,299 --> 00:36:55,691 Mo. Wait, please. 769 00:36:55,822 --> 00:36:56,997 - John. - Please. 770 00:36:57,127 --> 00:36:58,651 You seem very nice. 771 00:36:58,738 --> 00:37:01,741 Do you know what it is? I am looking for a man. 772 00:37:01,871 --> 00:37:04,483 And I can't waste my time with little boys anymore. 773 00:37:04,613 --> 00:37:05,895 I know I was an asshole the other night. 774 00:37:05,919 --> 00:37:07,113 - Mm-hmm. - But, I want to make it up to you. 775 00:37:07,137 --> 00:37:08,617 There's this fundraiser next weekend, 776 00:37:08,748 --> 00:37:10,726 and everyone who's anyone in D.C. is gonna be there. 777 00:37:10,750 --> 00:37:13,187 You want to take me to a Republican fundraiser? 778 00:37:13,318 --> 00:37:15,058 It'll be great material for your novel. 779 00:37:15,189 --> 00:37:16,775 And besides, we don't have to talk to anybody. 780 00:37:16,799 --> 00:37:18,758 We can just sit in the corner all night, 781 00:37:18,888 --> 00:37:21,048 drinking John Mitchell's scotch, making fun of people... 782 00:37:21,108 --> 00:37:24,329 Um, John Mitchell? Martha Mitchell's husband? 783 00:37:24,459 --> 00:37:25,808 Yeah. Why? You... you like her? 784 00:37:25,939 --> 00:37:27,419 She's completely insane. 785 00:37:27,549 --> 00:37:29,943 I love her. 786 00:37:30,073 --> 00:37:33,425 So you will go with me? 787 00:37:33,555 --> 00:37:37,429 Um, I'm gonna think about it. 788 00:37:37,516 --> 00:37:39,779 I'm gonna see when the airline has me back in D.C... 789 00:37:39,909 --> 00:37:42,085 Thursday. I-I mean... 790 00:37:42,216 --> 00:37:44,523 I hope they have you back on-on Thursday 791 00:37:44,653 --> 00:37:47,265 because that would be, uh... that would be perfect timing. 792 00:37:47,395 --> 00:37:49,397 Holy shit, man. 793 00:37:52,835 --> 00:37:55,055 - Do you have my number? - Leave it with the FAA. 794 00:38:14,770 --> 00:38:16,729 - Ahoy! - Oh! Ha ha! 795 00:38:16,859 --> 00:38:18,948 What the... 796 00:38:19,079 --> 00:38:20,907 Mitchell sent me down to inform you 797 00:38:21,037 --> 00:38:23,301 he's approved of my plans. 798 00:38:23,431 --> 00:38:25,433 Now, before you fill your diaper, 799 00:38:25,564 --> 00:38:28,044 you'll be relieved to know that I've trimmed the budget 800 00:38:28,175 --> 00:38:30,525 to a manageable quarter million. 801 00:38:30,656 --> 00:38:31,894 Hey, well, that's fantastic news. 802 00:38:31,918 --> 00:38:32,918 That's great. 803 00:38:32,962 --> 00:38:36,444 Uh, only problem is, um... 804 00:38:37,750 --> 00:38:40,100 Mitchell doesn't control the purse strings around here. 805 00:38:40,230 --> 00:38:41,841 I do. 806 00:38:41,971 --> 00:38:44,670 So you're gonna have to make do with $200,000. 807 00:38:44,800 --> 00:38:47,194 That's... that's all we got. 808 00:38:47,325 --> 00:38:49,718 Do you think this is a joke? 809 00:38:49,805 --> 00:38:51,067 No. 810 00:38:51,198 --> 00:38:54,244 This operation requires 811 00:38:54,375 --> 00:38:56,856 untraceable foreign contractors. 812 00:38:56,986 --> 00:38:59,249 I need at least five Cubans. 813 00:38:59,380 --> 00:39:02,992 Cubans? Well, I mean, how-how expensive are Cubans these days? 814 00:39:03,123 --> 00:39:06,300 Why-just get cheaper Cubans. What? Puerto Ricans? 815 00:39:09,259 --> 00:39:10,870 Hmm. 816 00:39:12,654 --> 00:39:15,135 You've never tasted your own blood. 817 00:39:15,265 --> 00:39:17,224 - Pardon me? - You haven't. Ah... 818 00:39:18,747 --> 00:39:20,662 I can tell. 819 00:39:20,793 --> 00:39:22,925 You know that? 820 00:39:23,056 --> 00:39:26,059 You don't know the first thing about passion, 821 00:39:26,189 --> 00:39:28,714 about el sangre de libertad. 822 00:39:28,844 --> 00:39:31,412 But you know who does? 823 00:39:31,543 --> 00:39:35,329 Those magnificent men you just maligned. 824 00:39:35,460 --> 00:39:36,243 - Yeah. - They know. 825 00:39:36,330 --> 00:39:37,505 God, I got to tell you, 826 00:39:37,636 --> 00:39:39,638 I-I don't appreciate your tone, Gordo. 827 00:39:39,768 --> 00:39:40,768 No. 828 00:39:43,032 --> 00:39:46,558 They are freedom fighters, you fuck! 829 00:39:46,645 --> 00:39:48,386 Please let go of me, you psychopath. 830 00:39:48,473 --> 00:39:52,564 You prep-school sissies think that you own the world... 831 00:39:52,694 --> 00:39:54,609 but you don't. 832 00:39:54,696 --> 00:39:57,569 The natural world rejects you. 833 00:39:57,699 --> 00:40:00,093 You taste your blood now, don't you? 834 00:40:16,892 --> 00:40:19,068 Bean-counting Ivy League fag. 835 00:40:23,333 --> 00:40:24,378 Rough day? 836 00:40:26,554 --> 00:40:29,514 Never thought I'd encounter a bureaucracy 837 00:40:29,644 --> 00:40:32,081 more stocked with vipers than the FBI. 838 00:40:33,996 --> 00:40:35,563 A thousand petty tyrannies. 839 00:40:37,957 --> 00:40:39,306 You're a Bureau man? 840 00:40:39,437 --> 00:40:41,830 Five years strong. You? 841 00:40:41,961 --> 00:40:43,789 CIA. 842 00:40:43,919 --> 00:40:46,444 I've always admired Hoover. 843 00:40:46,574 --> 00:40:48,968 They don't make them like him anymore. 844 00:40:49,055 --> 00:40:50,317 I agree. 845 00:40:52,667 --> 00:40:55,148 Jim McCord. 846 00:40:55,278 --> 00:40:57,585 Liddy, General Counsel. 847 00:40:57,672 --> 00:40:59,805 Liddy... 848 00:40:59,935 --> 00:41:02,503 fella who burnt himself with a candle, right? 849 00:41:07,769 --> 00:41:09,989 Gaius Scaevola would be proud. 850 00:41:11,381 --> 00:41:12,861 Hero of Rome. 851 00:41:14,167 --> 00:41:16,038 Soldier. 852 00:41:16,169 --> 00:41:17,866 Soldier. 853 00:41:30,270 --> 00:41:32,620 Oh, hi. 854 00:41:32,707 --> 00:41:34,622 Great shirt. 855 00:41:34,753 --> 00:41:36,668 Mo, he's here. 856 00:41:36,798 --> 00:41:38,191 Smells good in there. 857 00:41:38,321 --> 00:41:41,194 I, uh, smoked a little grass myself, back in college. 858 00:41:44,545 --> 00:41:45,764 Hi. 859 00:41:47,722 --> 00:41:49,594 Wow. You... 860 00:41:49,724 --> 00:41:51,160 You look... 861 00:41:51,291 --> 00:41:53,554 Thank you. Anything for Martha Mitchell. 862 00:42:05,218 --> 00:42:06,045 All right. 863 00:42:08,438 --> 00:42:10,223 Welcome, sir, ma'am. 864 00:42:11,746 --> 00:42:12,786 - For you. - Oh, thank you. 865 00:42:12,834 --> 00:42:13,879 Cheers. 866 00:42:14,009 --> 00:42:15,009 - Oh, hi. Hey. - John. 867 00:42:15,054 --> 00:42:17,273 - How's it going? - Hello. Hi. 868 00:42:17,360 --> 00:42:19,319 You have blood on your hands. 869 00:42:19,449 --> 00:42:20,514 Look who it is. See? Want to go say hi? 870 00:42:20,538 --> 00:42:23,323 Oh, my God. Yes, I want to say hi. 871 00:42:23,410 --> 00:42:25,194 - She looks amazing. - So gorgeous. 872 00:42:25,325 --> 00:42:27,109 I want to get a picture. 873 00:42:27,240 --> 00:42:28,937 Aw. 874 00:42:29,068 --> 00:42:30,286 Excuse me, Mrs. Mitchell. 875 00:42:30,417 --> 00:42:31,786 Uh, my name is John Dean. I work with your husband. 876 00:42:31,810 --> 00:42:33,333 Oh, Mr. Dean. 877 00:42:33,420 --> 00:42:35,050 Yes, my husband speaks very highly of you. 878 00:42:35,074 --> 00:42:36,641 Say hello to Mr. Dean, buttercup. 879 00:42:36,728 --> 00:42:38,338 - Hi. - Hello. 880 00:42:38,425 --> 00:42:41,210 Hmm. We're working on her volume. 881 00:42:41,297 --> 00:42:42,908 Who is this vision in blue? 882 00:42:43,038 --> 00:42:45,388 Maureen Kane. It's an honor to... 883 00:42:45,519 --> 00:42:46,738 I'm j-I'm a huge fan. 884 00:42:46,868 --> 00:42:48,435 Thank you. 885 00:42:48,566 --> 00:42:50,916 May I say the two of you make a striking couple. 886 00:42:51,046 --> 00:42:52,482 Oh, we're not really... 887 00:42:52,613 --> 00:42:53,721 That's so sweet of you. Thank you so much. 888 00:42:53,745 --> 00:42:54,746 Thank you. Thank you. 889 00:42:54,876 --> 00:42:56,704 All right, Mrs. Mitchell, right over here. 890 00:42:56,835 --> 00:42:59,098 Oh. Picture? 891 00:42:59,228 --> 00:43:01,883 Are we getting in? Oh, my... 892 00:43:02,014 --> 00:43:03,015 Thank you. 893 00:43:03,145 --> 00:43:04,233 Mm-hmm. 894 00:43:04,364 --> 00:43:05,974 Enjoy yourselves. Nice to meet you. 895 00:43:06,105 --> 00:43:08,063 - So nice to meet you. - Thank you. 896 00:43:10,283 --> 00:43:12,459 - Hmm? - Hmm. 897 00:43:17,464 --> 00:43:18,944 Okay, who are they, the buzz cuts? 898 00:43:19,074 --> 00:43:20,641 Oh, that? 899 00:43:20,772 --> 00:43:22,425 Uh, that's the president's chief of staff. 900 00:43:22,556 --> 00:43:23,636 On the right, Bob Haldeman. 901 00:43:23,688 --> 00:43:25,428 Okay. 902 00:43:25,559 --> 00:43:26,865 On the left is John Ehrlichman. 903 00:43:26,995 --> 00:43:28,625 And nobody gets to Nixon except through them. 904 00:43:28,649 --> 00:43:29,889 They call them the Berlin Wall. 905 00:43:29,998 --> 00:43:31,173 Hmm. 906 00:43:31,304 --> 00:43:33,306 - The Berlin Wall, huh? - Mm. 907 00:43:33,393 --> 00:43:36,396 Hmm. Hmm. 908 00:43:36,526 --> 00:43:38,180 Wait, where you going? 909 00:43:38,267 --> 00:43:41,749 Mo. No. Mo. Mo. Mo, Mo. 910 00:43:41,836 --> 00:43:44,622 Now McGovern's got James Taylor and Barbra Streisand 911 00:43:44,709 --> 00:43:46,101 stumping for him, 912 00:43:46,188 --> 00:43:47,712 as if the voters are going to be swayed 913 00:43:47,842 --> 00:43:50,062 by a couple of moderately fuckable socialists. 914 00:43:52,238 --> 00:43:54,588 I'm a big Streisand fan. What's wrong with her? 915 00:43:54,719 --> 00:43:57,156 - Excuse me? - Uh... 916 00:43:57,243 --> 00:43:59,245 sorry, you-you are? 917 00:43:59,332 --> 00:44:01,334 I'm Mo Kane. I think you know my date. 918 00:44:03,815 --> 00:44:05,643 John Dean, sir. 919 00:44:05,730 --> 00:44:08,036 I got a haircut. 920 00:44:08,167 --> 00:44:10,648 Yes, that's it. Right. 921 00:44:10,778 --> 00:44:12,298 My apologies if John caused any offense 922 00:44:12,388 --> 00:44:13,912 with the Streisand thing, ma'am. 923 00:44:14,042 --> 00:44:16,871 Oh, God. Hey, as a-a member in good standing 924 00:44:17,002 --> 00:44:18,917 of the league of moderately fuckable socialists, 925 00:44:19,047 --> 00:44:20,745 I accept your apology. 926 00:44:20,832 --> 00:44:22,442 Where did you find this one, Dean? 927 00:44:22,572 --> 00:44:26,011 She's a live one. 928 00:44:26,141 --> 00:44:29,014 Uh, by the way, Bob, I've been meaning to, uh, thank you 929 00:44:29,144 --> 00:44:32,104 for conveying that message from POTUS on my behalf. 930 00:44:32,234 --> 00:44:34,497 Mitchell told me about the, uh, president's request 931 00:44:34,584 --> 00:44:36,780 that I come help with the election compliance operations 932 00:44:36,804 --> 00:44:38,371 over at CREEP. 933 00:44:38,501 --> 00:44:40,199 Oh, uh, I'm... I'm sorry. 934 00:44:40,329 --> 00:44:42,090 I've never spoken about you with the president 935 00:44:42,114 --> 00:44:44,856 or really anyone else for that matter. 936 00:44:44,986 --> 00:44:46,814 Word of advice... 937 00:44:46,945 --> 00:44:49,599 learn to recognize a snake when you see one. 938 00:44:49,730 --> 00:44:51,471 Hmm. 939 00:45:01,786 --> 00:45:03,657 Oh, God. John, this party is crazy. 940 00:45:03,788 --> 00:45:05,877 Ehrlichman is a fascist. 941 00:45:06,007 --> 00:45:09,141 He wants to nuke all of Asia. Everyone's so evil here. 942 00:45:09,271 --> 00:45:11,360 I'm having so much fun. What's wrong? 943 00:45:11,491 --> 00:45:12,860 - You okay? - It's nothing. We should go. 944 00:45:12,884 --> 00:45:13,884 No, we just got here. 945 00:45:13,928 --> 00:45:14,928 I'll get our coats. 946 00:45:15,016 --> 00:45:16,148 Oh, okay. 947 00:45:18,541 --> 00:45:20,456 Uh, sir, Kissinger's office just called. 948 00:45:20,587 --> 00:45:22,130 They've been trying to reach you for the past hour. 949 00:45:22,154 --> 00:45:23,546 In regards to what? 950 00:45:23,677 --> 00:45:25,287 Apparently your wife spoke out 951 00:45:25,418 --> 00:45:29,030 about some sort of feud he's having with the president. 952 00:45:29,161 --> 00:45:30,466 What the fuck? 953 00:45:30,597 --> 00:45:32,381 Martha. 954 00:45:34,296 --> 00:45:35,863 God as my witness, woman, 955 00:45:35,994 --> 00:45:37,865 I will cancel your Diners Club card 956 00:45:37,996 --> 00:45:40,738 if you don't open this door right now. 957 00:45:40,868 --> 00:45:42,261 What? What do you want? 958 00:45:42,391 --> 00:45:43,760 You want to berate me in front of our guests? 959 00:45:50,660 --> 00:45:52,314 Oh, fuck me! Jesus! 960 00:45:52,445 --> 00:45:54,099 Ah. 961 00:45:54,229 --> 00:45:55,970 I mean... 962 00:45:56,057 --> 00:45:57,624 Sorry. 963 00:46:01,019 --> 00:46:04,544 - Are you okay? - I hate this stupid dress. 964 00:46:04,631 --> 00:46:06,851 My mom had it made for me. 965 00:46:06,938 --> 00:46:09,418 I look like Little Bo Peep. 966 00:46:12,682 --> 00:46:14,989 You want a Doublemint? 967 00:46:15,076 --> 00:46:16,469 No, thanks. 968 00:46:22,170 --> 00:46:23,345 Cigarette? 969 00:46:25,434 --> 00:46:26,803 It's just an interview, for God's sake. 970 00:46:26,827 --> 00:46:28,568 It's not the end of the world. 971 00:46:28,698 --> 00:46:31,266 You had to mention Kissinger, like I need more enemies. 972 00:46:31,353 --> 00:46:33,138 "Martha Mitchell bares all." 973 00:46:33,268 --> 00:46:35,290 Is this some kind of retribution for the other night 974 00:46:35,314 --> 00:46:37,577 'cause I didn't just drop everything 975 00:46:37,707 --> 00:46:40,449 and whisk Martha off to some foreign land 976 00:46:40,580 --> 00:46:42,016 or wherever the fuck? 977 00:46:42,147 --> 00:46:44,323 Yeah. So you... you do know I have feelings. 978 00:46:44,453 --> 00:46:45,977 You just choose to ignore them. 979 00:46:46,107 --> 00:46:48,457 I see. I'm sure if he asked to go on vacation, 980 00:46:48,588 --> 00:46:50,285 you'd have your bags packed in one hour. 981 00:46:50,416 --> 00:46:51,634 He's my boss. 982 00:46:51,765 --> 00:46:53,636 He's your life. 983 00:46:53,723 --> 00:46:56,378 You roll over for him day and night. 984 00:46:56,509 --> 00:46:58,380 - My God. My God. - What is the draw, really? 985 00:46:58,467 --> 00:47:00,687 - Tell me. The subservience... - That's enough. 986 00:47:00,774 --> 00:47:03,037 Is it that he makes you feel like a big man, 987 00:47:03,168 --> 00:47:05,431 - makes you feel wanted? - That's enough, Martha. 988 00:47:05,561 --> 00:47:07,650 I mean, your dick must look so big 989 00:47:07,781 --> 00:47:09,783 in his tiny hands. 990 00:47:16,572 --> 00:47:20,489 Look, let's just both take a breath. 991 00:47:23,362 --> 00:47:25,799 You take a fucking breath. 992 00:47:25,930 --> 00:47:28,149 My mama slaps me harder than that. 993 00:47:32,545 --> 00:47:34,416 You're a... you're a pig! 994 00:47:34,547 --> 00:47:36,288 All day... 995 00:47:40,379 --> 00:47:42,033 Nobody cares what you think! 996 00:47:45,732 --> 00:47:49,475 They used to like each other before we moved here. 997 00:47:49,562 --> 00:47:53,392 Now everything's just terrible. 998 00:47:53,522 --> 00:47:56,786 I hate parties. I hate all of these people. 999 00:47:56,917 --> 00:47:57,918 How old are you? 1000 00:47:58,049 --> 00:48:00,355 Eleven and a half. 1001 00:48:00,486 --> 00:48:03,315 What you need is an exit strategy. 1002 00:48:03,445 --> 00:48:05,752 You can petition for emancipation at 16. 1003 00:48:05,883 --> 00:48:08,233 Seems a little extreme. 1004 00:48:13,020 --> 00:48:14,020 And that isn't? 1005 00:48:16,284 --> 00:48:17,404 Do you have a business card? 1006 00:48:20,941 --> 00:48:24,118 I will represent you pro bono. 1007 00:48:24,205 --> 00:48:25,815 I'd get started now, 1008 00:48:25,946 --> 00:48:28,514 but, uh, I'm a little busy with the president. 1009 00:48:28,644 --> 00:48:30,777 My mom says Nixon's dogshit. 1010 00:48:33,562 --> 00:48:35,695 Honestly, I wouldn't know. 1011 00:48:35,825 --> 00:48:37,436 I've never even met the guy. 1012 00:48:43,964 --> 00:48:45,096 Bye. 1013 00:48:49,491 --> 00:48:52,103 - You ready? - Yeah. 1014 00:48:56,281 --> 00:49:00,024 The election is in eight fucking months, Martha. 1015 00:49:00,154 --> 00:49:04,332 You can just keep your mouth shut for eight months, 1016 00:49:04,463 --> 00:49:06,204 we'll be fine. 1017 00:49:06,291 --> 00:49:08,902 Get another wife if you want a silent one 1018 00:49:09,033 --> 00:49:11,470 or marry that portrait I had made for you, 1019 00:49:11,600 --> 00:49:13,689 which you never thanked me for, by the way. 1020 00:49:17,084 --> 00:49:18,999 You want to know the truth, Martha? 1021 00:49:21,436 --> 00:49:23,438 There's no conspiracy against you. 1022 00:49:23,569 --> 00:49:27,790 There's no collusion hiding in the shadows. 1023 00:49:27,921 --> 00:49:32,491 People just don't like you. 1024 00:49:32,621 --> 00:49:35,842 That's why we can't fly on Air Force One. 1025 00:49:35,973 --> 00:49:37,365 Oh, and those journalists 1026 00:49:37,496 --> 00:49:39,280 that you call in the middle of night... 1027 00:49:39,411 --> 00:49:40,629 They're not your friends. 1028 00:49:43,328 --> 00:49:46,548 They just can't take their eyes off a good show. 1029 00:50:19,059 --> 00:50:21,061 Bob Haldeman sees my name on six memos a day. 1030 00:50:21,148 --> 00:50:24,151 Has no fucking idea who I am. 1031 00:50:24,282 --> 00:50:26,545 Oh, important people are only as important 1032 00:50:26,675 --> 00:50:28,416 as the rest of us make them. 1033 00:50:28,547 --> 00:50:30,940 Just don't give them that power. 1034 00:50:35,293 --> 00:50:36,903 You're very wise. 1035 00:50:36,990 --> 00:50:38,774 You sound surprised. 1036 00:50:40,472 --> 00:50:43,649 These fucking people. 1037 00:50:43,779 --> 00:50:45,939 I think it's a good thing you're not like those people. 1038 00:50:45,999 --> 00:50:48,523 You're better than them. 1039 00:50:48,654 --> 00:50:50,917 - You barely know me. - That is true. 1040 00:50:53,267 --> 00:50:56,140 But I do know you well enough to know 1041 00:50:56,227 --> 00:50:58,751 that you're a good person deep down, 1042 00:50:58,881 --> 00:51:00,405 even when no one's watching. 1043 00:51:02,929 --> 00:51:05,714 But then I also know that you used the FAA 1044 00:51:05,845 --> 00:51:09,718 to find out my flight schedule, which is a huge red flag, 1045 00:51:09,805 --> 00:51:11,894 but it did show uncanny initiative. 1046 00:51:12,025 --> 00:51:13,853 Oh... 1047 00:51:13,983 --> 00:51:15,594 And I know your dirty secret. 1048 00:51:18,162 --> 00:51:20,729 In the moments when you shut up, 1049 00:51:20,816 --> 00:51:24,124 you actually know how to listen. 1050 00:51:24,255 --> 00:51:26,170 - Wait, I know how to shut up. - Stop talking. 1051 00:51:26,300 --> 00:51:28,041 - Wha... - Stop fucking talking. 1052 00:51:30,522 --> 00:51:31,784 I'm stopping. 1053 00:51:50,933 --> 00:51:53,197 Which one's your house? 1054 00:52:07,124 --> 00:52:09,169 Met a young couple tonight. 1055 00:52:09,300 --> 00:52:12,564 Reminded me of a long time ago... 1056 00:52:12,694 --> 00:52:16,437 being at the beginning of something. 1057 00:52:16,524 --> 00:52:18,483 I'm sorry, I didn't know anybody was out here. 1058 00:52:18,613 --> 00:52:19,613 That's quite all right. 1059 00:52:21,442 --> 00:52:22,882 Would you happen to have a cigarette? 1060 00:52:27,231 --> 00:52:28,536 Thank you. 1061 00:52:39,243 --> 00:52:43,247 I hope I'm not out of line here, Mrs. Mitchell, but... 1062 00:52:43,377 --> 00:52:45,205 I wanted to tell you that I read 1063 00:52:45,336 --> 00:52:48,165 your Ladies' Home Journal interview. 1064 00:52:48,295 --> 00:52:51,820 There aren't many honest people left in this town. 1065 00:52:51,951 --> 00:52:53,170 I believe you're one of them. 1066 00:52:57,261 --> 00:52:59,567 Well, thank you. 1067 00:52:59,698 --> 00:53:01,308 McCord, wasn't it? 1068 00:53:01,439 --> 00:53:03,963 Yes, ma'am, James McCord. 1069 00:53:04,050 --> 00:53:06,008 I appreciate you, James McCord. 1070 00:53:12,014 --> 00:53:13,581 Ma'am. 1071 00:53:24,897 --> 00:53:27,116 Mmm. 1072 00:53:27,247 --> 00:53:29,467 Mmm. 1073 00:53:33,166 --> 00:53:35,081 Mmm. 1074 00:53:35,168 --> 00:53:37,083 Fetch the sugar for me, would you, dear? 1075 00:53:59,540 --> 00:54:01,020 California? 1076 00:54:01,150 --> 00:54:02,935 We got a couple of fundraisers out there. 1077 00:54:03,022 --> 00:54:05,067 I thought it'd give you a chance 1078 00:54:05,198 --> 00:54:08,027 to try on that new swimsuit of yours. 1079 00:54:08,157 --> 00:54:11,248 The one with the cutouts? 1080 00:54:11,378 --> 00:54:13,989 I don't know if that's appropriate for a public beach. 1081 00:54:14,120 --> 00:54:16,165 Well... 1082 00:54:16,296 --> 00:54:19,299 maybe you and I could find 1083 00:54:19,430 --> 00:54:22,084 something a bit more... 1084 00:54:22,215 --> 00:54:23,521 secluded. 1085 00:54:29,483 --> 00:54:31,311 I want to go to boarding school. 1086 00:54:44,106 --> 00:54:45,325 You know, John, 1087 00:54:45,412 --> 00:54:46,932 whatever it is they're making you do... 1088 00:54:48,676 --> 00:54:50,199 you don't have to do it. 1089 00:54:51,940 --> 00:54:53,681 Just saying you always have a choice. 1090 00:55:23,842 --> 00:55:26,061 Oh, I'm sorry. Mr. Mitchell's out for the day. 1091 00:55:26,192 --> 00:55:27,846 Oh... 1092 00:55:27,976 --> 00:55:29,606 But you can leave that on his desk if you'd like. 1093 00:55:29,630 --> 00:55:32,546 Right. 1094 00:55:32,677 --> 00:55:34,200 Mr. Mitchell's office. 1095 00:56:11,803 --> 00:56:13,500 Mr. Dean, 1096 00:56:13,631 --> 00:56:16,285 uh, I can hold on to that if you want. 1097 00:56:16,373 --> 00:56:19,332 Give it to Mr. Mitchell personally when he comes in. 1098 00:56:19,463 --> 00:56:21,900 Don't worry about the letter. 1099 00:56:22,030 --> 00:56:25,120 It was a false alarm. 1100 00:56:25,251 --> 00:56:26,557 The names of great men 1101 00:56:26,687 --> 00:56:28,080 are etched in the halls of power... 1102 00:56:28,210 --> 00:56:29,734 I'll see myself out. 1103 00:56:29,864 --> 00:56:34,129 Napoleon, Alexander, Charlemagne. 1104 00:56:36,610 --> 00:56:39,787 But who will tell our stories when we're gone? 1105 00:56:39,918 --> 00:56:41,789 Who will sing our songs? 1106 00:56:45,402 --> 00:56:47,969 For not all men who change the world are remembered. 1107 00:56:49,928 --> 00:56:52,452 Most are lost like embers in a fire. 1108 00:56:54,846 --> 00:56:57,588 Some worship at the boot of power, 1109 00:56:57,718 --> 00:56:59,807 weak against the tide of human frailty. 1110 00:56:59,938 --> 00:57:02,549 I know your spot right there. 1111 00:57:02,680 --> 00:57:05,465 Others are born to be forgotten, 1112 00:57:05,596 --> 00:57:07,946 reaching for a greatness they can never fully grasp. 1113 00:57:17,477 --> 00:57:19,871 There she is, machos... 1114 00:57:20,001 --> 00:57:21,699 our destiny. 1115 00:57:21,786 --> 00:57:23,483 Qué es eso? 1116 00:57:23,614 --> 00:57:25,224 El Watergate. 1117 00:57:31,186 --> 00:57:34,712 But make no mistake... 1118 00:57:34,842 --> 00:57:37,192 a triumphant will is what binds us 1119 00:57:37,323 --> 00:57:39,717 to those creatures from the prehistoric sea. 1120 00:57:42,371 --> 00:57:46,593 And with it, we can alter the course of human history. 1121 00:58:25,632 --> 00:58:27,504 Ow!