Subtitles by explosiveskull www.OpenSubtitles.org M_I_SForEver
Oh, Jeff! Hey.
Uh, yeah.
I think you're mistaking me for someone else.
Oh, there you go.
Ah.
No.
Like, it's Iris, from Clarissa's party.
Yeah. No, I... Yeah, sorry. I don't think you're...-
Oh, my God.
I'm sorry.
Yeah. No, it's okay.
I thought you were Jeff. Oh, my God.
Awkward.
And you're walking this way, too.
Yeah, I know.
- Great. - I'm Simon.
- Iris. - Yeah. Got that.
Uh, tell me something about yourself, Iris.
Mmm, okay. Well,
my sister Agnes is engaged to
this porn-loving guy named Justin.
She can't see he's such a sleaze ball, but I can.
But no one ever listens to me.
I mean, my opinion
doesn't really count much in my family,
especially when it comes to my sister.
She's just smarter and, like, you know,
more serious than me.
And it just makes me feel, like, stupid,
or almost invisible.
Yikes.
That's too much.
No. It...
- Huh. - Hmm.
I have these, uh,
super strict Mennonite parents.
They don't live in the city,
but they're, like, always dropping in
to, like, check in and see what I'm doing.
Yeah?
Mostly it's just super embarrassing.
But, like, it's so clear to me
that they also think
I'm this 10-year-old kid still.
I don't know.
Hold on.
You want to go grab a drink?
Right now?
Yeah.
Uh, yeah.
So, seeing that
I've already overshared and stuff,
I have a proposal.
May I?
- Please. Yep. - Okay.
I propose we never see each other again
after tonight,
so we can say anything we want.
I don't need to know your last name.
You don't need to know mine.
Just reveal whatever secrets
we want to, just for tonight,
and then we'll leave it at that.
Uh...
...okay.
Yeah?
Yeah. I'm very nervous right now. Should I be?
You got a lot of secrets?
Ooh, you do.
- We'll find out. We're going to find out. - Okay.
And we're cheers-ing on it.
Here goes.
That's legally binding.
Okay.
You first.
I just tell you a secret?
Yeah. Anything. Random.
Uh, I have a fear.
You have a fear?
I have a fear.
I'm, um, scared of horses.
Why?
Uh, I don't... They're for... Okay.
Um, they're... I don't know.
- I honestly do not know. - Is it just the way they look?
- Is it the sound? - Yes. Their weird looks.
It feels like maybe they know how you feel.
Maybe. I don't know.
Wow.
I don't trust them at all.
I mean, sure.
Fully afraid.
And I wish I had, like, a cool story
where I was, like, caught in a horse stampede, but no.
Yeah. You know, like... Or something like
you were on a horse and then you fell off.
Not even that. Never even got on a horse.
Good start.
Uh, I keep a bullshit journal.
I do this thing where I have a blank agenda,
plan some dates and events
and trips, write it in pen,
but I don't actually do them.
It's just for show.
I kind of like it.
There's something... There's something to that.
- Interesting. - Yeah, right.
- Yeah, yeah. - You'd be, like...
No, no. You got... There's something.
It's, uh, layers. I'm, like, scared of horses.
You got a whole... You got a whole thing.
Weird.
I've only been here for three... Three years.
- I came from Morden. - Oh!
- You know it? - I've never been.
- Oh, my God. You're missing out. - Am I?
City of dreams, yeah.
- Wow. - Yeah.
- Anyways, so I came here. - Yeah... yeah, came here.
And I didn't know anyone.
The first time I went to a bar in this city,
I got in a fight.
Wow. You don't...
Not, like, a fight.
Like, I just got, like, the shit kicked out of me.
Oh, yeah. You don't strike me as a punchy...
Probably, like, the accurate... Scrapper, yeah. No.
Yeah, okay.
And I couldn't stop thinking about it,
and I kept playing it over and over in my head.
And then I found the guy, online.
And, uh, ever since that happened,
I follow him on Facebook.
And I just constantly check his page,
because I'm hoping one time I log in
and something, like, really horrible has happened to him,
like house burned down, fell down a flight of stairs.
Anything. Like, I check it a lot.
That's fucked up.
I know. I know.
I was born with...
...a congenital heart disease.
Like, my heart has this tiny little hole.
And if they weren't going to fix it, I was going to die.
My parents always tell me this,
how they looked at
the entire operation through a window,
so they've literally
seen my heart.
So, I can't really hide anything from them.
I, uh...
I never...
...do this. You know what I mean?
- I can't, uh... I feel like... - Talk to people?
Well, no. I can talk to people.
I just sort of feel like
I usually... I never let anyone close.
When things get intense, I walk.
I literally walk out the door.
So, it's easier just to wear this mask,
and I can't let anybody past that,
'cause then it's just me after that, and I don't know.
I don't want to give that to anyone.
Hmm.
I always wished that I was that girl,
the one that makes the wild choices.
Like, I've only ever had one guy
that I slept with,
and that was a while ago.
I don't feel like
anyone could want me.
Like, I'm just this unlovable girl.
You seem like the opposite of unlovable.
Well...
...it's getting late. I got to go.
Oh, seriously?
Thanks for the...
Yeah. Yeah, totally.
Okay. Yeah.
Bye-bye.
You ever been in a three-way?
No.
You want to?
Uh, with you?
Well, yeah, probably.
So, this dude, he's talking to me, right?
He's asking me all these questions, and then he's, like,
"How would you like to make a thousand dollars
"to be in a porno? And if you bring your friend,
he can make a thousand dollars, too."
You want to do a porno?
You want me to be in a porno, with you?
Why not? Yeah.
What? It's not weird.
- It is weird. - It's not weird.
Yeah. It's ridiculously weird.
I cannot believe we're having this conversation.
Look.
You don't have to look at it.
I won't look at yours.
You won't have to look at mine.
- We don't got to make eye contact. - You will look at mine.
I might just. Why?
- No. - Why not?
It's insane to me that I would have to explain that to you.
Well...
Well, it's not like you ain't having sex.
Now you're just getting paid for it.
Ugh.
What? What's up?
Nothing.
What? Come on. Fuck that. What's up?
You and I, we know each other.
We can be ourselves.
You can ask me to be in a porno for some reason.
But you know, you meet someone new
and, uh, you can't.
You have to say certain things and be a certain way,
and if you take it too far too soon, then...
You know, but it's all in the service
of getting to know them,
so I don't see why you can't...
No, no. We going to talk about, what, Margaret again?
We're going to talk about...
Margaret? What? Iris. Iris.
Iris. Yo, yo.
Okay. We're going to talk about Iris again.
No, I'm not. What do you mean, "again"?
No, no, no. Keep going.
This is very interesting.
- Oh, I'm sorry. Am I interrupting you? - No, no, no.
Are you working right now or what?
I come to you, telling you
about my fucking great porno idea,
and you're over here talking about some random woman
you ain't going to never talk to again.
No. It's not...
It felt like there was something there,
which I don't feel like happens every time I meet someone.
- You know what I mean? - Sure.
And I didn't get her last name and, uh, now she's gone.
So, that's pretty classic me.
You could try to, uh, stop bitching for a bit.
Have you thought about that?
Did you try, uh, not complaining?
How did that go for you?
You good? Like, because I wouldn't want you
to accidentally start working...
...someone helping out with this shit.
It doesn't matter, ultimately. That's what I'm saying.
Because even if I found her, you know,
we did this weird oversharing thing...
You got to stop this.
You got to beating up on yourself like this, okay?
'Cause you are handsome and funny.
- You got really pretty eyes. - All right.
You are good at
whatever the fuck you're doing over there.
Come do a porno with me, all right?
We would be so good at it!
I am not. I can't believe that's where that was going.
- We would be so good! - It's not going to happen.
Oh, no, no, no.
I'm not... Why am I hearing the sound of yimmer-yammering
when I'm supposed to be hearing the sound of hammering?
I don't understand. I just don't get it.
Gentlemen,
you got to let me help you so you can help me.
All right? What have I told you guys about talking on the job?
Not to, all right?
Three reasons: number one, I'm losing money.
Number two, you're losing money.
And number three, the powers that be...
They're sucking the information
right out of your brain when you're not focused.
You think I'm joking? Check your phone.
Every time you go on that phone, they're vacuuming your brain.
So, I need you to be focused. Okay, guys?
- Yep. - You got that?
- Yep. - Hey, Simon?
You missed a spot. You? Keep stirring paint.
Yeah, yeah.
- What are you looking at? - Well, it's break time, man.
Yeah.
- It's time to... - No, no. You fail to understand.
I came over here to break your balls
because you weren't working.
So, break time? I don't think so.
♪ Sparks began ♪
The last thing is giveaways and door prizes.
And that will be all in the wedding party
and the... I don't know. The niñas and niños.
Iris, Iris?
Iris?
Hello?
Come here, Iris.
Can you figure out
if your work can do a social donation?
...budget plans. So, come over.
No, she's too... Dad, she's too busy.
She's thinking about Stanley.
Stanley?
I mean, Steven. I mean...
What?
It's Simon!
Right. I was right. Simon. It's Simon, Mom.
It's Simon and I'm never going to see him again, okay?
Simon and she's probably going to see him again.
No, no, no, Ma.
We just had a drink that one time and that's it, okay?
Fine. Okay, okay, okay. What do you want me to do?
You can handle the budget.
Tell me.
Nurse?
...music... boyfriend...
No, I don't think so.
Okay.
Just give me the list and I'll do it.
Yeah, sure. Yeah.
No, no. I'll do it. I have my own stuff at work.
Okay, Ma? I'll do it. I won't mess it up.
Do you promise?
Yep. I promise.
You're going to do it...
Give her a chance.
Yes, ma. Simon says give her a chance.
Simon?
No.
Is that what you want?
No. We are not letting Simon touch this.
You are going to do the budget.
I will not see him again, okay?
So, I will fix this.
I don't want you to make the same mistake.
- I'm telling you. - I won't.
Oh. It's Justin.
- Can you get it, please? - Thank you.
Oh. Justin.
Hey.
- Hey. - Hi, hon.
Hey, hey. Sorry I'm late.
Hope you guys didn't get too far without me.
No. Did the car start?
It did, eventually.
Good.
Good. You're here.
Yeah, thanks. It's good to see you.
Hi.
How far did you get? Did you get to the budget yet?
Um, Iris is going to do the budget.
Cool. Well, maybe we could do it together,
'cause I was kind of hoping
I could actually have a hand in that.
- Oh, that's good. Yeah. Great idea. - Yes, yes. Do it together.
Okay. Maybe you could just, like, meet and stuff?
- Hi. How are you? - It'll be easier that way.
- Good to see you again. - You, too.
- Okay. - Hi.
- Oh, okay. - Go ahead.
- Yeah, I do. - Where are you going?
I'm going to go get some food. Is that okay?
Oh. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, it's fine.
- You'll be okay here? - I'm fine.
- Okay. Iris, can you drive? - Take care.
I'm going to get you to grab me
some barbecued chicken, spicy.
And, uh, I don't need nothing to drink.
Just come in and get it yourself.
No, no, no. I'm got to go park the car.
We have, like, 12 minutes.
Exactly. So, if you could get the food, that'd be awesome.
You're just going to sit here and smoke?
No, I'm not just going to sit here and smoke, okay?
Come on. Hurry up.
Okay. So, I'm going to get the number seven,
the barbecued pork sandwich, and...
Iris?
And what do you want, a number 11?
I don't know. Is that what you want?
Yeah.
Are you sure?
Iris, what do you want?
Just pick one.
- Hi. - Hi.
This is...
Well, what are you doing here?
Uh, I'm just on a break, actually, from work.
I need to get back. But, uh...
That's so funny.
Yeah. We probably should've known this was going to happen.
Ah, it's Winnipeg, right?
Winnipeg, yeah.
Yeah. You were literally...
Yeah. I was just literally thinking about the other night.
So, that was...
Oh, crazy. Yeah.
Yeah. Me, too. I was, uh, thinking about you.
Uh,
do you, uh...
Can I give you my number?
Just if, like...
- I mean... - Or should we, like...
I don't know.
Did we go too far? I would get it.
'Cause we did. We put... I put a lot out there,
and if I heard all that from someone
- maybe I would not like them. - No, no, no.
I would understand if you hate me.
I'm very hateable. It's my superpower.
No. I mean, we're here now,
so I guess it cancels it out.
So...
Okay, yeah. No.
Yeah? Okay.
Yes. I would... That would be...
- That's a... - Here.
So, you can just, like, call me, and then...
Cool.
I think it'll ring
in three, two...
There you go.
Yep. There it is.
- Hello? - Hi.
- Yeah. - It's good.
- Well? - It's working.
I guess I'll talk to you in a bit.
Yeah. Whenever, or never, or... Yeah, sure.
- Okay. - Great.
Oh, I knew it!
What? It's legal now.
- Hi. - Hey.
- Come on in. - Thanks.
- How you doing? - Good.
That's good.
So, you got something?
Oh, yeah. Launch right in to it.
Okay. Let's hear it.
This is sort of a, uh, kind of folk vibe.
Let me know if you know it.
♪ There is a house in New Orleans ♪
Really?
♪ They call the rising sun ♪
That's, like, the first thing you find on Google.
- What? - Yeah.
♪ It's been the ruin of... ♪
All right. I was prepared for that.
Also got this. Kind of a death-metal vibe.
♪ There is a house ♪
I was really hoping you wouldn't play that, but yeah.
- You know it? - Yeah. Found that one.
I am so relieved. Did not want to listen to that.
All right, all right. This is good.
This is a bit of a challenge.
I also have this. Sort of a...
♪ It's the house of the, say, yeah ♪
Where'd you find this one?
Okay. Yeah. I'm just going to tell you.
♪ Say, love, it's the house of the rising sun ♪
- Huh. - Huh.
Interesting.
Look forward to seeing what you got.
Do you want a drink?
- Yeah, sure. - Yeah?
♪ You can meet me there but don't tell no one about it ♪
♪ It's the, uh ♪
Cool.
What?
Joni Mitchell.
Joni is a national treasure.
Preach.
Am I being judged right now?
Yeah.
- Thank you. - You're welcome.
Oh.
♪ Find me where to work, it's all work and no Play-Doh ♪
Well, don't stop here. I have an entire apartment of things
just waiting to be judged by you.
Okay. Let's see.
You've got some more tapes,
CDs and this thing.
What is this thing?
It looks like it's about to fall.
That thing is a weird bowl, obviously.
And it's intentionally placed that way
so that when the world tilts out of balance
I will have advance warning.
Obviously.
Is that yours?
Yeah.
Oh, my gosh. Oh, my gosh. It's real.
Yeah, yeah. I know. It's not just a prop.
Whoa.
Can I?
First time in the apartment. Just straight to the bass, huh?
I don't know a lot of people
that have their own upright bass.
Fair enough.
Do you play it?
I play, like, uh, two notes pretty well.
That's pretty good. Let's hear it.
Oh, yeah. No, no.
Not, like, on request or anything like that.
It's not a solo instrument.
You play the bass with other people and it, uh,
connects you in a deeper, almost spiritual way.
Sort of, like, uh...
Two notes.
What? Do you play?
I'm a singer, yeah.
I play guitar, but I don't play bass.
- Really? - Yeah.
I've always wanted to, you know,
play shows on my own, and...
Well, then, I am definitely not playing this thing for you.
- Oh, come on. Two notes. That's pretty good. - Two notes, yeah.
When I'm at, like, 10 to 15 notes,
then I'm going to leave you with your own personal solo.
No, but...
But no, no, I can't. I can't. I can't.
Come on. It's two notes.
Do you hear that?
Snowplow.
Let's go.
Oh, there he is.
There he is.
You got to watch this, 'cause what I love about this guy
is that some guys are just clearing snow,
but you can tell that this guy loves what he's doing.
- Mm-hmm? - Yeah, okay.
- Hold on. - What?
Well, he's going to do, like, a 360 little move.
Just watch.
Yeah. Artistry.
Ooh.
Just so you know, we're not having sex tonight.
Which means that we are on another night?
But you didn't?
Yeah, but we will.
When?
Yeah. I don't know.
Like, at some point in the future, I guess.
But, like, I can't believe how good it is when we're together.
Like, she's just so playful...
Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Totally get it. Come on.
...and just so willing to jump into stuff,
and we just, like, absolutely...
Look. Your story is amazing. Seriously.
I'm so enthralled by it. But right now, save my life.
Yeah, okay.
Oof. Okay. All right. That was okay.
That was close. Maybe a little lower.
Yeah. All right. Again?
It's just, like, I have not been in this situation before
where I don't know what she really wants, ultimately.
And it's just... I wouldn't blame her if she thinks...
Shh, shh. Look at me. Look at me.
You're beautiful. You're what every man wants.
Now give me the Heimlich, okay?
And... Oof. Okay. I deserved that.
Yeah. I'm just going to break a rib or something like that.
Show me how it's done, and then...
All right. Ready?
I guess, yeah.
Ooh! I can't tell if that's working.
I need it to work, all right?
What happened?
I went to the porno the other day, right?
Oh, my God. You actually went through with it?
- I went through with it. - What was it like?
It was weird. It was weird as fuck, man.
You...
And what'd they make you do?
I don't want to talk about the porn, man.
What I want to talk to you about is
I go to the craft services table, right?
I'm just eating some food, and this dude comes next to me
and he starts fucking choking, man.
He chokes and he falls to the ground
and I'm sitting there looking at him, and I just...
I froze.
Right.
And that could have been you.
That could've been you sitting there.
And you're choking and I'm sitting there freezing,
and what if nobody comes, right?
So, what? He just kept choking?
No, man. Someone came and saved him eventually.
It just wasn't me, right? And I just...
I don't want to be the guy
that's remembered for standing next to
the person who died, you know?
Okay. I don't think I'm going to choke, man.
This isn't a porno set.
Just trust me.
- Oh! We're not doing that again. - You okay?
Okay. Well, come to...
Let's take a class. You and me.
I'm not going to do that. It's not going to happen.
What if I'm the one? What if I'm sitting on the floor, huh?
Well, I'm never going to be on the porno s...
- Hey. - Hey.
Yeah. Sorry I'm late.
Just got a little bit of time, break from work.
Yeah? Cool.
Uh, what do you got so far?
I'm just looking at how much the hall actually costs.
Which? Which one?
Petrus. I think Agnes mentioned that...
Yeah. That was one of them.
There was a few others, too, though.
But have you done anything, like...
Uh, yeah.
...planning-for-the-budget wise?
Mmm, yes. I did create, like, a chart.
Okay. I'm just going to come over there.
Okay. Uh, what's this?
Agnes left you a folder just so you have something to look over.
Oh, okay. Great. Cool.
And, uh, is this the same thing here?
Yep, should be about the same.
Okay, okay.
So, uh, tell me about this Petrus Hall, I guess.
Yeah. It's really huge.
Have you, besides this,
have you, like, looked at anything?
Is there anything else that we've, like...
Well, I tried to look at other stuff,
but this is the hall that she really wants to use.
Okay. Here. I'm just going to grab this.
Okay. And you have the DJ filled out already?
Oh, yeah. I talked to a friend, and I'm pretty sure
I can get him for $500, so I just put it in there.
- You're pretty sure? - Yeah, pretty sure.
Okay. Well, if we go with a DJ, that's good to know.
I really appreciate that. That's awesome.
Oh, well, thanks.
Uh, can I just say something?
I really feel uncomfortable
when you get really close and start to touch me.
Uh, I'm sorry.
I didn't mean anything by it.
I'm just being friendly. I'm sorry.
Oh, okay.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's fine.
- No, no. I didn't mean to make you feel uncomfortable. - Yeah. Sorry.
I'm just, like, you're going to be my sister-in-law.
I just, you know... Sorry. I just...
Yeah, yeah. Yeah, sorry.
No, no. It's all good. It's all good.
- Um, really appreciate the DJ. - Yeah.
That's gonna be awesome. If you could contact Petrus Hall,
I gotta get back to work.
- So, is that cool? - Yep.
Great. Awesome. Thank you so much.
The theme of the social is going to be Hollywood.
Ooh, Hollywood? Woo!
Yeah, like red carpet.
Justin's friends want to do live karaoke.
They suggested that.
Oh, no, no, no, Papa. There you go again.
No. You can't just do that.
No, Mom. You should hear Justin sing.
Yeah. His voice is so... It's so honest.
Ugh.
Iris...
What's your problem?
Something's wrong?
Oh, no, no. Sorry.
Oh, no, no. I heard you.
Nothing, nothing. I'm sorry.
I just... I got to go.
Uh, you know, Iris,
we're busy here, okay?
I just heard you.
What's that?
Nothing.
You never help us here.
But something's wrong.
Here, Mom.
Iris...
See? We're so busy here talking about...
but you still have this attitude.
Speak up.
It's nothing, Ma. It's nothing. Sorry.
Sorry. I just have to be somewhere.
I'm sorry.
No. We are talking about your...
Iris!
Why do you always have to be like this?
Me? You should ask Mom why she's always such a bitch.
Oh, so you throwing all the attitude
wasn't you being a bitch?
She's always picking on me. It's always me, right?
Yeah, because you're the one with the problem.
I do not have a problem, for fuck's sake.
What is wrong?
Does it ever fucking bother you
how Justin is so touchy with every girl he meets?
No.
That's just him.
Of course.
Iris, you know, just because you had a failed relationship
doesn't mean you have to take it out on mine.
We're all happy here,
and you're the only one that's upset
that all of this is happening.
You know what? Forget it.
Thanks a lot, Agnes.
Somewhere right around here.
So, in such a way that the angle is
sort of like right into there, the corner pocket.
So, you kind of back it up and, uh...
Iris.
What are you doing?
What did you tell Agnes
about what happened the other day?
- What do you mean? - What did you tell her?
I just told her how I didn't feel comfortable about,
well, how close you get...
Okay, but did you tell her about
how we were cool afterwards?
How it was a misunderstanding?
- No, I didn't. - Why not?
Because that's how we left things,
and then you tell her that I was being inappropriate?
I didn't... She told me it was... Like, she understood.
Like, I thought that I just left it off that way.
I didn't think it was such a big deal.
No. It's apparently a bigger deal
than you thought it was.
She said it was fine.
I don't know if that's actually what you told her or not, okay?
No. I told her exactly what I thought.
- That we had... - I didn't exactly have...
- Hey. - Hey.
What's up?
Oh, yeah. This is Justin, my brother-in-law.
- Hey. - Simon.
Brother-in-law.
Hey.
He's my boyfriend.
Cool.
Good to meet you.
Yeah. Good to meet you, too.
Well, uh,
don't let me interrupt.
Um, cool.
Yeah. Thanks.
You okay?
Yeah. Just...
So, uh, boyfriend?
Yeah.
It kind of just slipped out. Sorry.
Oh. It's just...
From over there, I was looking at the two of you
and it kind of looked like, um...
He was my boyfriend?
Where I was standing, it kind of looked like he could've been.
Oh, God, no.
Okay. Uh, I was... Too good to be true.
Really?
Yeah.
So, um,
that means, uh...
What?
Uh, hold on. Hold on. Hold on.
I just need to tell you something quick.
Okay.
Like, I need to...
Oh, like, you want to...
- Yeah. - Yeah, okay.
Okay. Sorry.
Okay.
I used to be married.
Like, years ago.
It lasted, like, nine months and then he left.
Uh, whoa.
Yeah.
Um, are you still married?
Oh, no, no, no. Not anymore.
Not at all. That's done.
Okay, and that's, like, behind you and everything?
Yes.
I mean, at this point, you could have said something
a lot worse than that.
So, if you're okay, I'm okay.
Okay.
Although, like, um,
if that's the conversation we're having,
I mean, I should tell you that
I've been with more than one person.
I've been with, like, 30 people.
Okay.
Man, your eyes look weird upside down.
Your eyes look weird upside down.
So, you, uh...
...you didn't come there, hey?
No. It's a thing.
Right.
So, like, exactly 30?
Or...
Okay. You know what you're doing?
I kind of know what I'm doing.
You kind of know what you're doing?
This is an important skill to learn, and I'm trying...
Oh, my God. Okay.
And this goes here, and then you're choking,
and it's kind of like a...-
Ooh.
Oh, I see what you're trying to do here, buddy.
What's wrong? What am I trying to do?
Ah.
You don't seem to care about it.
Yeah, 'cause I'm a private person. No.
I definitely don't care, you've absolutely got that right.
You don't care about me.
No. It's not that I don't care about you.
I'm going to give you this.
Really? What is this?
Just a little day-brightener.
Really? Joni?
Yeah, Joni.
I have a surprise.
Hmm.
Just a little mixtape for you.
Wait a second. Did you make this?
Whoa!
Is this what I think it is?
Oh, my God! This is so cute.
A new bullshit planner.
You remembered.
I remembered, yeah.
What the fuck do you mean, you're in love?
Like, it's been going good and the feeling is growing
and now when she's not around, I think I'm in love.
Well, how do you know it's love? Are you sure it's love?
Are you sure it's not something else?
What else would it be?
Maybe it's a different emotion.
Maybe you're really angry.
You know, those parts in your brain
are actually really close together: love, anger.
- People get confused all the time. - No, man.
It's... That's what it is.
That's dramatic. Nobody is in love anymore.
You know who's in love? 15-year-old girls.
That's who falls in love.
No, man.
I think I want us to move in together. I don't know.
You're just going to say...
But you barely know this. You're going to say it?
You're just going to come out and say,
- "Let's move in together"? - Well, I agree that's what I need to figure out, but...
How ridiculous does that sound?
Whoa, whoa. You're trying to
bring them back to life, not kill them.
If you do it faster, they come back to life faster.
Everybody knows this.
100% not a thing.
So, you think I'm moving too fast?
I think you're moving way too fast.
- You think I need to take time? - Yes.
I'll take time. I'll leave the city.
- Yes. - Go on a trip.
Yes! Leave the city.
Go on a trip. Go... We could do a road trip.
Do you want to go on a road trip?
Not us. We're not both going to do it.
What, you don't want to hang out with me?
We spend a lot of time together and also,
I think what we're talking about right now
is me spending time to myself
trying to figure out what it is I want
and giving her the space to figure out what she wants,
and then coming back at it with some intention.
I think it's a good idea.
Yeah, it's a good idea.
It's not a bad idea.
It's a good fucking idea.
This thing is not fucking working for me.
Yeah. I don't want to use these, okay?
Just get rid of this, quick.
What are you doing?
Shh, shh. Just do it on me. Just do it on me.
No. I'm not going to do it on you.
Come on. Just give me this.
'Cause you're just going to, um...
No, come on. Just...
This is an actual class that you wanted to go to.
You're going to get us kicked out.
- We're not going to get kicked out. - Yeah, we are.
We're going to get extra credit.
We're supposed to be using a mask and a mannequin.
Exactly. A mannequin, okay?
A mannequin is not going to be dying on the street.
I'm not going to do this right now with you, okay?
You're a fucking coward. You're being a coward.
- I dare you. - I'm not being a coward.
- Oh, my God. - Do it. Do it. Come on.
Just shut up. Just shut up. Shh. Okay. 30.
Ready?
Open the airway.
Let's take the mask off the face.
Do you have an erection right now?
No.
You do, though. Oh, my God.
It's not...
It's not for you.
Don't flatter yourself.
Hey. Keep going, everybody.
You must have a boarding pass and photo ID before entering...
Boo.
Um, I... All right.
Hi.
- Where's mine? - Thanks for, uh...
Well, I didn't know if you wanted to start
as early as I have.
So, welcome to here.
Is this one of your spots to just chill, or...
Uh, no. Not actually.
No. This is all sort of out of the blue for me.
Is that yours?
Yep.
Oh.
I'll just jump into it. I'm going on a trip.
Today.
Oh.
- Which is... - Today, today.
Yeah, as spontaneous as it sounds.
- But I... - Hmm.
I want you to, you know,
And you want me to go with you?
Cool. I brought my passport.
Crazy. Uh...
I mean, I figured, "Meet at the airport"...
I just thought, in case...
Oh, man. Um...
Sorry. I, uh,
bought a ticket
to go on a trip, like,
just, like, on my own.
You're kidding.
I'm sorry. I... No, no. I...
- No. You're kidding. - I really did not...
Yeah, I'm sorry. No. I just...
You're not kidding. Holy.
Let me start again.
I love what's going on between you and I,
and this is part of that. This is...
I feel seriously about this.
Simon, if you need to break up with me you can just do it.
Whoa! That is, so, so far.
Please don't think that.
If I've said anything that makes you think that,
forget it.
What? You're going on a trip. You're not...
Look. Here's the thing. I'll eat my ticket.
I'll literally eat my ticket if you don't want me to go
because you think it's... I just think
if we do this... And I know it's a crazy choice,
but it'll be this opportunity for us
to make this into something more intentional.
So, it's like stretching our wings, right?
It's like sowing the wild oats
and then coming back to something
that we really understand and have perspective on.
But wouldn't that just poison everything?
Wouldn't that just...
I don't think it will.
But it'd be worth knowing, no matter what, right?
Will anything that I say make a difference at all, or...
Like, do I get to say anything?
Absolutely, absolutely. Because...
- 'Cause... - Yes, you absolutely have a say
if you want.
Okay.
I mean, you and I are the most important...
- Yeah. Just give me a... - Yeah.
Let me think about this.
You're going to...
Okay, yep. Take five on that.
It's a wild choice.
So, let's do it.
What else did he say?
He said that he just needed to go,
and we needed to sow our wild oats or something.
Who says that?
Simon.
Why? What did you do? Did you do something?
No. Like, it was just... Everything was going fine.
I don't know.
Maybe he's just afraid that it was getting too real.
So, what? Then you came home after?
Yeah. I just came home and I let him go.
And then, I don't know...
You literally stood there in the airport like a idiot
as he left you?
Yeah.
Do you not see what's, like, wrong there?
I'm just going to wait.
I mean, two weeks is not that long, right?
Did he say something to you?
Text you when he landed or anything?
No. I think it's, like, a "break" break.
I don't hear from him
- for two weeks. - Are you kidding me?
No, Iris.
I just... I can't do it.
Stop setting yourself up to get so hurt.
Well, I can't do anything. He's gone.
I just have to wait and that's all I can do.
No, you don't.
You went from one big relationship that you, like,
committed to so hard, and then...
Yes. I get it, okay?
You don't have to bring it up every time.
Mom is still getting over it.
Okay. We... Yeah. I know that.
This is, like, Chapter 2.
You can't just be jumping
from one relationship to another
and, like, sleep with two people
your whole entire life.
I think you need to go through, like,
a phase.
Like, see other people?
No. I think you need to ho around for a little bit.
Oh.
There's, like, a reset button
at the back of your vagina,
and I think you need to, like...
No.
I am not going to go through that.
No. I don't need that.
Yes. Yes, you do.
Honestly, when I did it,
- it was just like... - You went through a phase? Wow.
Yeah. I went through a phase and I loved my phase.
And then I met Justin, and now my phase is done.
Like, go have fun.
It's fun.
You don't have to worry about anything
or hurting anybody's feelings or having your feelings hurt.
It's just you and a bunch of cute dudes.
No.
- Yes. - No!
Yes. Give me your phone.
- No. - Give me your phone.
Iris...
- What are you going to do? - Nothing.
Give me your phone.
- Oh, my God. Can you... - Stop.
You cannot seriously be downloading my...
Yes.
Oh, my God. You're actually going to do it.
You know what? If something bad happens to me,
- I'm going to blame you. - Nothing bad is going to happen to you.
I'm trying to become a podcaster, you know?
And just, like...
Like talking about music? Or what kind?
Uh, you know, I'm looking more at, like,
trying to, like, document the internet.
I mean, the internet is kind of a broad subject, but...
Right? Smile?
It's, like, I got a couple of buds
and we're just going to, like, you know, kind of, like, chat,
and it's going to be, like, just a nice, cool podcast.
I don't know.
Uh-huh.
So, like, you looking for anything, like,
casual or whatever?
What do you mean?
Show me your tits.
Ew.
- Hi. - Hello.
- I like your face.
Thank you... I guess.
What area of the city do you live in?
I live somewhere in The Maples.
Oh, nice. That's close to me.
Hey, you want to come over sometime?
Maybe we should talk first...
Oh, cool. Yeah, yeah. We can talk.
Yeah. Tell me something more about yourself.
Oh, you know, uh, I like to dance.
Hey, do you have naked pictures?
I notice that you say you're a hunter.
I was just curious what that meant.
Uh, it means, like, I shoot animals.
And then what do you do? Like...
Usually, I just skin it
and cook it up and eat it.
So, you, like, you gut it and...
Yeah.
- So, you see all the blood, and... - Oh, yeah.
Oh.
Hey.
- Hey. - What's up?
Not much.
I promise that I'm not a dog face.
My profile pic is just my dog.
- Aw. - I have a human face.
Yes. That is... Yes.
That's, uh, my dog, Bailey, though,
- in the pic, yeah. - Yeah, I figured.
- He's very cute. - Thank you. Thank you. You like dogs?
- I do. I love dogs. - Nice.
- He's not at my apartment right now. - Aw.
Yeah. He's with my parents.
I like to let him go out to the country
every couple of weeks
and just, you know, run around.
It's not... I don't think it's right
for a dog to spend its whole life in the city, so...
- Yeah. - ...just give it a break.
Thoughtful of you.
Thank you.
Just a sec.
Okay.
That's never happened to me before.
No, it's okay. Um...
But, uh, ready to go.
Ready to go.
Yeah. Actually, I was just going to put my pants on,
and I was going to go.
Sorry.
No, I'm sorry, because it's...
I just feel it's, like, not fair to you that...
- Oh, no, no, no! - You know?
It's okay. Like, I...
Because you didn't finish, either, so...
Yeah. It's a... It's fine.
You don't believe that I can do this.
- No, no! I do! - But I can do this.
I swear to God, I can do this.
If I can do one thing in life, it's this sex thing.
And...
I... I get that.
I'm okay. Thank you.
Thank you, though. Really.
I proved to myself that I can do it in there.
I wish you saw it, because it was amazing.
It was beautiful, and I want to show it to you now.
- Okay. - TMI. First date.
Here's the thing.
I really didn't expect
for this to go so far...
- Yeah. - ...so soon.
Uh, I just really went on a dating app
because my sister told me to.
- Okay. - Uh, I...
Is your sister cool?
She's getting married.
You see, my boyfriend left, and I... I thought
that this would really help me get over it.
Uh, my sister thinks that there's a reset button
at the back of my vagina,
but I... I guess there's not.
So... Yeah.
That's like a metaphor.
I... Yes, I know.
Oh, God.
Just go on another one! It'll be fine!
I do not want to go on another one.
I'm just going to wait for Simon.
Uh, what?
Maybe that's what Simon meant
when he said to sow the wild oats, you know?
Because now, I just know that he's the one
- that I want, so... - No, that's not what he meant.
Well, I'm not going to do it again, Agnes.
You did not sow your wild oats!
You sowed one oat.
You had one, okay? So, go on another one!
- No! - Ah, frick, Iris.
- I just don't want to. - I can't believe
you did not put the keys in your frickin' pocket!
- You got me. - Mm-hmm.
- Hello. - That's good. Hi.
Hi.
Ho, it's easy to forget how cold this city is!
Did you miss it?
No, I didn't miss it, per se.
- Mm. - Missed you.
Hey, you didn't get any of my text messages, eh?
No. Just... I just got them all right now.
- Ho, that's bad. - I know.
- But... - You got mine?
Yeah, all at once. I thought my phone was going to blow up.
Sorry.
Yeah. No. I'm sorry, too.
Um, actually, I'm...
I'm really sorry, because that trip kind of was
what I thought it was going to be,
and... and I had a lot of time to think, but...
I had a lot of time to think,
and, uh, one of the things I realized...
- It's right here. - ...was, uh...
that maybe it seemed like a good idea,
but it was a selfish idea.
And... I'm embarrassed
that I even went through with it,
and I'm sorry about that.
It's okay.
You're here now.
Thank you for being cool.
Get in, then.
But the other thing that I realized was, um...
Or... Sorry.
Hi.
Uh...
Uh, before you take off...
When I was down there and, uh,
I had all that space that you were...
- Yeah. - ...good enough to give me.
You probably sowed your wild oats
and slept with a whole bunch of women,
so now, we got to talk about it.
What? No.
No. That's not at all what I meant when I said that.
Is that what you thought I was doing?
Yeah.
Oh, my God. I'm so sorry.
No, no, no. I didn't mean that at all.
I meant to...
Geez. Yeah. No.
I was, like, alone the whole time
and I was... I was thinking about you.
And I was thinking about all the stuff that I...
...that I already knew before I left.
And that's that... you know...
uh...
I love you and...
I want to move in together.
And... that's it.
I had a... a whole thing that I was going to say,
and now, I can't remember it at all.
Right.
And... and take your time, but just know that I...
can't breathe right now, so...
Right.
Yeah!
- Yeah? - Mm-hmm.
That doesn't seem crazy to you? That's...
No! No.
Yeah. Yeah, it is, but...
But no. Yeah. I would love to move in with you.
Okay.
God, you took two weeks to figure that out?
Geez.
Moving in together?
Yeah. I've decided to move in with Simon.
What?
Do... do you know this guy?
Ma, it's been a while. We've been dating a while.
"It's been a while." You would say that?
A while, Iris?
Arthur! Arthur...
Talk to your daughter.
We're so busy with the social, and here goes your daughter
saying she's moving with Simon. I don't even know...
Do you know Simon?
Who's Simon? No.
Ma.
What will they say? What will our friends say?
We're Catholic.
I am 23, and...
Twenty-three!
...before, when you got married with this Bong,
and then you got this divorce.
Oh, my God!
...relatives and friends.
- But Ma, I was 19. - What do you say about this?
I didn't know what I was...
This is not the right time.
Okay? This is going too far.
Nope, nope, nope.
I forbid you for doing this.
Nope.
...moving, moving. Nothing.
She's going to do it anyway, Mom.
I know!
You're being quiet.
I have seen your heart.
I know. That's it.
You've decided.
Do you think you're doing it right?
If you think you're doing it right,
I'm out of this. We're done.
Got it?
Yep.
Uh, let's just bring everything in here,
and then we'll do it in here.
Okay.
That is one trip, one trip.
- No problem. - Okay.
Did you talk to your parents about all this?
- Oh. Yeah. - Yeah?
- Yeah. - And they're cool with it, or...
Um...
What is this thing?
What do you mean? It's an ironing board.
Your shirt's inside out.
- Yes, it is. - Okay.
I get to wear it twice like this.
Okay. Hold on. Hold on.
Oh, God. Uh, do you always
wear your shoes inside the house?
Uh, not all the time.
I take them off to shower.
Good. Uh...
- Do you want me to take them off? - Yes, please,
because it's going to be a thing.
- I don't want to start a thing. - Thank you.
But how do you... know?
Please. Watch.
Clean.
Also clean.
Okay.
What are you doing in there?
Laundry basket?
- What's that for? - It'll just live there,
and you don't have to ask about it ever again.
Banana sauce?
It's ketchup.
No, it's banana sauce.
What? Do you put this on bananas,
or is it made with bananas?
It's ketchup.
It's got bananas in it.
Oh.
Uh, we're going to have to go shopping.
- What? - Yeah.
I have so much food.
No! There's not enough. What if people come over?
Well, what if people come over and they don't want to eat?
Well, they're going to eat anyway,
because you serve them food.
Where did the sauce go?
Up there.
I think that clears this box.
Wow. We did it.
Awesome.
Superstar.
Okay. So...
I would love for you to meet my family on Saturday.
It's Agnes's social. It's...
- Right. - It's this Saturday,
and I think it would be great if you would could come.
- I would love to. - Yeah?
Yeah.
Okay.
Oh, my God.
I think that's it.
- Yay. - We're done.
Yes.
Now what?
Play that bass.
No.
Aw. You know you can't escape me anymore.
No, no, no, no, no.
You are not yet ready,
and by "you," I mean me and the bass.
I live here now, so...
Some other time.
- Boo! - I have something better,
actually, if you'll follow me.
- Just over here. - Okay.
Roomie.
What is that supposed to be?
That is, uh, supposed to be
your face on a cake...
- Oh, no. - ...which I know
you've always wanted.
It was... I did a sketch,
and then I thought I could put the sketch on a cake.
And so I got someone else to do it, and it...
- Ah. Sure. - ...uh, it turned into that...
- Blame it on the artist. - ...which is, in my defence,
not actually what I drew.
But, uh, it still might be fun to eat.
It's so awful!
Yeah, it's a little scary,
but that's why we got to get rid of the evidence.
But it... You know, it only lasts
as long as it takes us to eat this, so...
Eat.
- You alright? - No, no, no, no, no, no.
Hey, whoa.
Hey.
I can't do this. I can't do this to you.
I can't do this to you.
I'm so sorry.
For what? You're freaking me out.
No, no.
- Are you okay? - No.
I slept with someone else...
while you were gone.
I'm so sorry.
I just wanted you here, but...
but I thought I'd lost you, so...
No, please say something.
You wait until now to tell me?
I...
Well, you got home,
and then you... you told me you loved me.
And it's all I ever wanted, and I...
I couldn't...
Right.
When were you going to tell me?
Because you've already moved in,
so that's... fucking great.
- That's good. - I... They were going to...
So, just the moment I left, you just thought
that that would be prime opportunity to do that, or what?
No, no! You told me to sow my wild oats,
- and so I did. It's... - That's not what that means!
Of course it is! How could you not know?
How is that what that means in... in that context?
It means "take what you have and go out in the world,"
not "just fuck a bunch of guys the second I'm gone!"
It was just...
I didn't know, okay? I'm sorry.
Yeah, you didn't know. You just heard
whatever you needed to hear in that moment,
which is...
But you left, Simon.
You asked for a break.
- No! I... That's not what I said. - You asked for a break!
- And you know... - That's not what I said at all!
Yes, it was, and you know what?
That's what people say when they never want to come back, okay?
That's what fucking Bong said, so of course I was going
to think I was never going to have you back!
What are you talking about? Well, that's not me!
It's just you. It's just you on your own with that decision!
Oh, you destroyed this.
No. I didn't mean to.
I didn't know, okay?
What are you doing?
Where are you going?
Simon, wait.
I... I...
I would do anything, anything,
just to take back everything that I did
and make this all okay.
So can you come back and work this out, please?
Simon?
Yo, Simon. I was just shaving. What's up?
Hey. Uh, it's actually Iris.
- Who? - Hey.
Why are you... Hold up. What are you doing with Simon's phone?
- Who is this? - It's Iris.
Uh, Simon's girlfriend?
Oh, okay.
Why you got Simon's phone?
Where's Simon?
Uh, yeah. I was actually going to ask you
if you knew where he was.
Uh, no, no.
He hasn't... he hasn't texted me. Why?
Mm. Okay.
I just wanted to ask, because he... uh... he...
left, so...
Uh, what do you want from me?
He's not with you, huh?
No, he's not.
Is that all you need? Are we done?
Actually, uh, do you know where his parents live at all?
Like, their address or...
No. I don't know. They live in one of those
fucking Mennonite... Uh, Morden. Morden.
That's the name of the town, right?
No. What... Why are you asking me where his parents live?
Why? That's none of your fucking business.
- But it's... - Stop freaking out about all...
Simon just leaves sometimes, alright?
He just leaves. Just leave it alone.
Do you know exactly where in Morden he lives, or...
No, I don't know where in Morden his parents live.
I don't think you should be asking those questions.
Ugh. Whatever.
Hey. Uh...
How are you? I haven't seen you in so long.
Hi! Nice to see you! How've you been?
Good. Are you guys just helping out
with the stuff for the social?
Hi, Iris.
Those look nice.
Can I have two of those?
Mila, do you have enough?
Yeah. I do.
Hi, Pa.
Iris...
I was wondering if I could borrow the car.
- Car? - Yeah. I'm...
- Where are you doing? - I'm going to Morden,
just to meet Simon's family, and he's already there,
so I just need to... get there.
Okay. Uh, before I give you the keys,
come closer.
- Okay. - Now...
let's forget about this for now.
You know what?
I just want you to know,
your mom really loves you, okay?
She only wants you to be happy, okay?
- Okay. - Yeah?
If Simon will be the right guy for you
and you will be happy...
Yes, Pa. Of course.
...Hundred percent...
Yeah? I'm going to support you 100 percent.
- Okay. - Hundred and one now. Okay?
Okay.
That's one percent more.
But be sure.
Mm-hmm.
Okay?
Don't put your family through this...
- Yes, Pa. - ...unless this is the right guy.
Okay?
Yes, Pa.
Remember that.
He might have a library card,
but we are not allowed to give out our patron information
because of the Privacy Act.
Right.
Perhaps a... phone book, maybe? Uh...
- Yeah. - Yeah?
Yeah, we have a phone book. For sure.
Okay!
Oh, wow.
That's a lot of Friesens.
There are a few Friesens.
Excuse me!
Sorry. Uh, are you from here?
No. I'm actually from Winnipeg. Sorry.
Okay. Yeah. You didn't look familiar. Are you, um...
- Yes. - ...Filipino? Okay.
Filipino.
Um, you look lost.
Are you okay? Do you need help?
Actually, I'm looking for my boyfriend, Simon Friesen.
Uh, do you know him?
Everybody's Friesen here.
Yeah.
I don't know if I know him,
but my daughter might know him.
She knows everybody...
- Okay. - ...I think.
Uh, I just live around the corner.
Are you hungry? You must be hungry.
Oh, no. I'm fine. I actually, uh,
just grabbed something to eat.
Oh, no. I'll give you a snack. Ramon!
- Hey. - I want you to meet somebody.
- Hi. - And here.
- I brought you a surprise. - Ooh! Thank you.
- This is Iris. - Hi. Hi.
You can call me Ram. How are you doing?
- Good. - Good. You hungry?
- No. I'm okay, actually. - Oh, come on.
- No, no, no, no, no. - We'll give you a little bit.
Come on. Just a little snack.
Jane, um, I found Iris wandering around town.
She came all the way from Winnipeg...
- Yeah. - ...looking for somebody.
I told her that you might know him.
- What's his name again? - Uh, Simon. Simon Friesen.
- Mm-hmm. - Simon Friesen.
Yeah. He lived over there... a long time ago.
By the store?
No.
If we get in the car, can you take us there?
Yeah. I'd recognize it.
Okay.
That would be great.
Okay. Well, if you're going to drive there,
you should know that nobody's been there for a long time.
Uh... what do you mean? Like...
Hey!
Do you... Excuse me!
You... Do you live here?
I live over there.
What's your name?
Allison.
I'm Iris. What are you doing here?
Vaping.
I'm here to look for Simon, Simon Friesen.
- Yeah? - You wouldn't happen to know him,
- would you? - I know him.
- You do? - Yeah.
Uh, do you know if anybody still lives there?
Do you know if he's...
Simon and his dad did.
Okay! Do you know if his dad is still in there?
He died three years ago.
Oh.
Okay.
He was a mess.
He was always yelling, angry at Simon.
My parents wouldn't even let me go over...
Um, this is Simon Friesen, right?
- Yeah, Simon Friesen. - Like, blue eyes, dark hair?
- That's... that's him? - Yeah.
How did his dad die?
He died from drugs and alcohol.
Simon stuck around to take care of him, but...
And then he left?
And he just took a bus to Winnipeg,
and nobody's seen him since.
What about his mom? What happened to his mom?
His mom left him when he was, like... three.
Moved to BC, I think.
That's what they say.
- Hi. - Oh! hi!
Hi.
How are you?
- Um, I'm good. - Yeah?
- How about you? - Good.
Are you leaving?
Yeah. Mom, Iris is home!
Hi, Ma.
Do you need anything?
No, no, no. Um, can you just help Dad?
Oh, my God. He just can't figure it out with the lights.
- Okay. I can do that. Yeah. - Okay. Okay.
Just let me know if you need anything else.
Are you sure you don't want me to come with you?
No, no, no! It's okay!
You don't have to!
- Okay. - Thank you!
Okay. You tell me if you need anything.
- Yeah. Okay. I will. - Okay. Okay.
- I'll see you later. - Bye!
- Hi, Tita. - Oh, hi!
Oh, Tita Baby and Tita Edna, they're here.
They're making shanghai.
Oh, okay.
Are you okay?
Yeah!
Hi, sweetie.
How are you?
- I'm good. - Yeah?
Yes. Oh. Hi, Tita.
Iris.
Do you need help with any lights?
Oh, it's okay. Um...
- Yeah. No. I forgot. Sorry. - Aw.
Here. I'll give you the key, anyway.
- Sorry. - Yeah.
The aunts are being so weird.
Like, they're being so nice to me.
Why is that?
I'll tell you honestly.
Simon left you.
How did you guys...
A friend of your Tita Flor, okay,
knows the family in Morden.
Tita Flor told us about it.
Why don't you see your mom and apologize?
No, Pa!
I don't need to apologize to you guys for the things that I do!
I'm so tired of you guys telling me
that I'm always the one that's fucking up!
- No, it's not! - Pa!
Please! Why don't you see your mom...
- No! - ...and apologize?
- No! - Why not?
You want me to apologize to Mom
because I fucked up again?
You want me to give that to her, Dad?
I don't want to argue with you.
Just see your mom and apologize, right now.
Fine! You want me to apologize to Mom?
I don't owe you anything!
I don't need to apologize to you for anything...
- Do you think... - ...that's happening
- in my personal life! - ...you know what you're saying?
I know exactly what I'm saying.
I am saying that I am done with this bullshit
- between you and me. - Now, you're telling me...
Okay. You don't get to tell me what to do anymore, Mom!
- No. - Listen!
In our family, you put so much shame on us!
And that's what you make me feel every fucking day of my life!
So, what happened to Bong?
It doesn't matter what happened to Bong, Ma!
- And then there's another guy? - That is past! How can you...
And then you didn't even tell anyone
that you went there at Morden?
Because exactly this is what's going to happen!
We're trying to improve... We're trying to help you,
- your dad and I! - And you're helping me by what?
- Yes! Exactly! - You haven't even asked me
if I'm fine, Mom!
You know my boyfriend left me, right?
Did you ask me if I'm okay?
You want to know why I married Bong, Mom?
I married Bong to make you guys happy.
- Because you always... - I married him
because I thought it would make the family happy.
It would bring us together
and for once, for once,
I don't feel like I'm... I'm a cloud,
a dark fucking cloud that just everyone looks down on.
Why can't you just get someone like Justin?
You think Justin is so perfect, don't you?
- Yeah! - When that guy is a creep!
He tries to touch women in the most inappropriate ways!
- Oh, no, no, no, no. - Mom, he is a pervert!
- Come on. - And you're making Agnes
- marry this man? - I don't believe you.
Agnes is making the same mistake as I did three years ago!
- No. - It's going to ruin her!
I don't know what's wrong with you.
It's going to ruin her, Mom, the same way that it ruined me!
I would do anything, anything,
just to take back everything that I did
and make this all okay.
So can you come back and work this out, please?
End of the line, pal.
Hey, man.
We're closed.
Yeah.
Simon! You're home!
You... you're home! How long have you been home?
Were you going to call me if you were going to...
- I was trying... - Okay.
- I was worried sick! - Yeah, I know.
- And you... - Look, I'm sorry.
And you left without a coat, and...
- Yeah, I know I did. - ...you left your stupid phone!
- I know. I didn't think about it. - I...
That's why I didn't wear shoes or a coat,
because I wasn't thinking, okay?
I wasn't. I didn't think about it.
It's just a thing that I do, and the cat's out of the bag.
That's a part of me, and it's weird.
I know it is, but I just feel
like I don't have control over it,
because it's, like, this thing
that I inherited from my mom.
And I swear to God, I'm working on it,
but sometimes, it's just really hard to not... act like that.
And that's... Oh, that's... not great.
And I'm sorry if I scared you.
You did.
You just had me so worried, okay? I...
I know.
You can't just leave and not tell people where you're going.
And we just had that big fight, and I wasn't...
Hey.
Are you okay?
Yeah.
That's not fair.
I mean,
do you know what it was like for me
to just be left there
at that stupid airport after you had just told me
that we needed to sow our wild oats?
And so I did.
Do you know what it feels like
to just betray the one person that you love the most
and then just think that it's completely fine?
- Look. I know. I know. I know. - And I wasn't even sure
if you were going to come home anymore,
and then you just...
- And then you leave again. - Wait. Don't.
I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. You're right.
You're right. I fucked up.
It was my fault. It was my fault. I made you...
- Please don't. Don't. I'm sorry. - I didn't even know
if you were going to come back anymore.
And then you leave again and again and again.
Please, please, please, please, please.
I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
Any more secrets you want to get out?
Because now would be the time.
I think it's your turn, actually.
- Oh, my turn. - Uh-huh.
Is there anything else you wanted to tell me?
No.
Nothing at all, huh?
Not even from our first date?
No.
Why won't you just tell me?
I went to Morden.
I saw your house.
The girl next door told me. I know about your dad.
I know your mom left.
Why won't you just tell me?
You're wrong.
Whatever you heard, it's about someone else.
It isn't me.
No, no, no. No, no, no. It's okay. It's okay.
No. That girl, Allison,
she's talking about someone else.
It isn't me.
No, no, no. It's okay.
Just look at me.
I see you.
Oh.
Seriously?
You are lying to my face, Simon,
and you don't get to just walk away from me.
Stop it. I just gave up so much for you, and...
Stop it! Hey!
Get... You're not going anywhere. Stop!
I love you, okay?
And... But you have to let me in.
You have to stop locking me out
and just running away.
You won't...
You won't... you won't tell me the truth about your family.
You won't fricking play bass for me,
like I'm not good enough for you.
Look, you can't do that anymore, Simon, okay?
Your mom left,
and your dad...
All that stuff, that's you.
But you can't just keep lying to me about it.
One-night stands.
You can go back to all of that bullshit,
but I... I want more.
No. I'm fucking done!
I... don't...
need it any... any more!
Did you just have an orgasm while dumping me?
Yes.
- Appreciate the ride. - No problem, man.
- If you just, like... - That's what I do.
...wait outside, it's going to be...
Oh, no, man. You're going to a social.
I'm coming inside with you. That's no question.
I... Well, I mean, again,
I think it's going to be, uh,
kind of a stealth in-and-out sort of scenario.
No, I'm coming in.
Alright.
You look good. It's a bit of a different look
from the last time we, uh... talked.
- You think so? - Yeah.
- You like it? - Yeah, man.
Yeah. I think this is more...
This is more me, you know?
Yeah. Yeah. Totally.
- Hey! - Hi! How are you?
Good! Thank you for coming!
Hey! Good to see you, man.
How are you?
I think we're out of the...
- No dumplings? - That one is karioka!
- Karioka. - Karioka. Yeah. Karioka.
Do you want one?
Oh, you made it!
- Hey! - Of course you did.
How are you?
Thanks again for helping me out in Morden.
Of course, of course.
Uh, it didn't work out with Simon so well.
- That's too bad. - It's okay.
I just have to do stuff, but please have fun.
- Yeah. - Okay, thanks.
See you.
There's nothing there.
Twenty-eight, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37.
Hey, Iris. How's it going?
- Hi. - What the fuck are you doing?
- Oh, I'm sorry! Uh, I'm sorry! - Are you serious?
- Yeah. I... I didn't mean to. - We just talked about this!
- I know. - She doesn't like it!
I was just... I know! I'm sorry!
- Tonight of all nights? - I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
- Just stop! - Yes. I'm sorry.
I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
Jesus! Are you okay?
I just wanted to say thanks for helping me out.
Have a good time, alright? Okay.
- ♪ Iris ♪ - Oh, no, no, no, no.
What are you doing?
♪ I'm real sorry ♪
♪ For lying about my story ♪
♪ Being accusatory ♪
Live Karaoke already?
That's the only rhymes I thought of for that part.
Uh... um...
- Let's go. - ♪ These... ♪
- Let's go. - What?
♪ ...Are the two notes I know ♪
You always do this!
I don't know this song!
♪ I wish that I knew more ♪
It's fine! Get Iris up.
- She can improvise. - ♪ From now on ♪
♪ I'll be an open door ♪
But we don't know the song!
We have to grab the mic before Tito Rod starts to sing!
♪ Doo-doo doo-doo ♪
Iris! Come!
♪ Doo-doo doo-doo ♪
♪ Doo-doo ♪
♪ Fa ♪
♪ Doo-doo doo-doo ♪
She's choking!
- Ma! - Mom!
- Ma! - Oh, my God.
Mom? Are you okay?
Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
Please, please.
Please don't die!
Ate, are you okay?
- Ma? - Is she okay?
Ma?
Oh, my God.
Iris.
You saved Mama.
The security guys are assholes.
Well, I mean, you walked in without a ticket.
I don't know what you were expecting.
Yeah. Okay, but you know, you're security at a social.
You take it easy. You're not the SWAT team.
Yeah, and you walked into a social
and said you were the band,
and you were not the band, so...
Yeah. Well, I'm saying it's excessive.
I think what was excessive was your song.
How many times you got to say sorry?
♪ I'm sorry, I'm real real sorry ♪
- Shut up. - ♪ For being accusatory ♪
Okay. Alright. Thank you. I was there.
Was it that bad?
No, it wasn't... it wasn't that bad.
Listen, I'm proud of you, alright?
You did something good.
Good for you. Yeah, it was shit, man.
Like, it was... it was absolutely awful.
- Yeah. - But...
Okay. Nice Heimlich maneuver, Superman.
- There you are. - Iris.
- What were you thinking? - I...
I'm sorry. I... I...
You couldn't have just called me
if you wanted to play your bass over the phone?
- That would've been fine, Simon. - I... I just felt
that if I did something big enough...
And I had to... I had to fight for the band.
You know, this is my sister's social.
I don't need this right now.
Okay.
My mom wants to meet you.
- Like, to kill me or... - No, no!
She thinks you're sweet,
and... she liked your song.
Clearly, she's tone deaf, but...
Come on.
Uh... okay.
- Yeah. I'm really sorry. - Yes, Simon. Okay. I know.
Literally everybody that I know on this Earth
knows that you're sorry.
Yeah, okay.
Like, I still can't believe you did that.
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