1
00:00:46,539 --> 00:00:49,041
{\an8}(英國,布里斯托)
2
00:00:50,209 --> 00:00:53,796
{\an8}(平安夜)
3
00:01:09,311 --> 00:01:10,312
再一杯?
4
00:01:10,396 --> 00:01:13,315
我還站得直挺挺的,當然要
5
00:01:20,072 --> 00:01:22,408
(伯尼祝你聖誕快樂)
6
00:01:23,659 --> 00:01:24,743
呵呵
7
00:01:27,371 --> 00:01:28,873
一品脫啤酒
8
00:01:30,958 --> 00:01:32,167
剛下班?
9
00:01:37,506 --> 00:01:41,343
等等還要輪班,也算是一種下班啦
10
00:01:41,427 --> 00:01:42,970
你不會要開車吧?
11
00:01:43,053 --> 00:01:45,931
我只要控制方向,都是馴鹿在跑
12
00:01:49,727 --> 00:01:54,523
這是我第四年扮聖誕老人了,你呢?
13
00:01:55,065 --> 00:01:56,233
數不清了
14
00:01:57,651 --> 00:02:00,487
我都忘了一開始幹嘛要做這件事
15
00:02:00,571 --> 00:02:02,990
跟所有人一樣吧
16
00:02:04,033 --> 00:02:05,451
為了錢
17
00:02:05,534 --> 00:02:07,036
錢哪…
18
00:02:08,620 --> 00:02:10,915
整座星球根本靠貪婪在運轉
19
00:02:14,877 --> 00:02:17,129
孩子臉上的表情很棒吧?
20
00:02:17,213 --> 00:02:18,881
那是支持我的動力
21
00:02:18,964 --> 00:02:21,050
表情啊,說得對
22
00:02:22,801 --> 00:02:24,762
大概開心兩秒吧
23
00:02:24,845 --> 00:02:29,183
一拆開禮物,他們就想要下一個
24
00:02:29,725 --> 00:02:32,019
只想要更新的酷東西
25
00:02:32,519 --> 00:02:34,355
這世界就是這麼回事
26
00:02:34,438 --> 00:02:39,568
瞧這些孩子都變成什麼了,
一群小廢物
27
00:02:40,569 --> 00:02:44,990
一堆小混蛋,只想要求,不願相信
28
00:02:45,074 --> 00:02:48,202
他們只會要個不停,拼命消費
29
00:02:53,749 --> 00:02:55,709
這可能是我最後一年吧
30
00:02:58,212 --> 00:02:59,755
最後一個聖誕節
31
00:03:04,134 --> 00:03:08,013
我可受不了又看到一個聖誕老人崩潰
32
00:03:08,597 --> 00:03:11,058
他的酒錢算我的吧 -好
33
00:03:11,141 --> 00:03:13,227
你人真好,謝啦
34
00:03:14,353 --> 00:03:15,729
我得走了
35
00:03:16,939 --> 00:03:19,275
禮物可不會自己飛出去
36
00:03:22,069 --> 00:03:23,904
這是妳孫子的,省得我跑一趟
37
00:03:24,363 --> 00:03:26,532
是他想要的新電玩
38
00:03:26,615 --> 00:03:29,368
太空歷險什麼的,我搞不清楚
39
00:03:29,451 --> 00:03:30,452
(給麥奇 聖誕老人贈)
40
00:03:30,536 --> 00:03:31,537
聖誕快…
41
00:03:31,620 --> 00:03:33,831
你怎麼知道我孫子的名字?
42
00:03:35,207 --> 00:03:37,084
你怎麼知道我有孫子?
43
00:03:37,793 --> 00:03:38,919
欸!
44
00:03:39,587 --> 00:03:41,797
那扇門是去屋頂的!
45
00:03:41,881 --> 00:03:43,215
醉鬼
46
00:03:43,299 --> 00:03:45,718
算了吧,現在是聖誕節啊
47
00:03:48,012 --> 00:03:49,013
嘿!
48
00:03:49,513 --> 00:03:51,390
你不能上來這裡
49
00:03:51,473 --> 00:03:54,059
要是你摔下去,我可就…
50
00:04:14,872 --> 00:04:16,332
我的天
51
00:04:23,172 --> 00:04:24,173
真是…
52
00:04:26,258 --> 00:04:27,509
美…
53
00:04:51,450 --> 00:04:54,286
{\an8}(康乃狄克州,格林威治)
54
00:04:56,413 --> 00:04:57,873
(媽)
55
00:05:14,598 --> 00:05:16,308
嗨,是我
56
00:05:17,142 --> 00:05:19,061
她在這邊,我的小可愛
57
00:05:20,145 --> 00:05:21,814
我們去看奶奶了
58
00:05:26,735 --> 00:05:27,736
聖誕快樂
59
00:05:30,322 --> 00:05:32,324
聖誕快樂,楚蒂,過來
60
00:05:34,034 --> 00:05:37,788
聖誕快樂,爸拔,“你這禽獸”
61
00:05:39,164 --> 00:05:41,500
她熬夜看《小鬼當家》了
62
00:05:41,584 --> 00:05:43,627
好喔 -那部片超好笑
63
00:05:45,045 --> 00:05:46,964
對 -那…
64
00:05:47,047 --> 00:05:48,257
有點刺耳
65
00:05:48,340 --> 00:05:49,508
整個早上都這樣 -好
66
00:05:50,175 --> 00:05:51,176
謝謝妳
67
00:05:52,636 --> 00:05:53,762
願意這麼做
68
00:05:54,555 --> 00:05:55,848
我不是為了你
69
00:05:58,350 --> 00:06:00,477
聖誕節要到了! -對!
70
00:06:20,623 --> 00:06:23,167
聖誕快樂,艾爾 -琳達,聖誕快樂
71
00:06:23,250 --> 00:06:25,211
萊史東先生 -嗨,艾爾
72
00:06:25,294 --> 00:06:26,378
楚蒂,妳在後座嗎?
73
00:06:27,129 --> 00:06:30,257
妳一定很期待聖誕節 -你要什麼禮物?
74
00:06:30,341 --> 00:06:31,926
平安夜不要上班
75
00:06:32,009 --> 00:06:34,136
但我今年太淘氣了,所以沒拿到禮物
76
00:06:35,054 --> 00:06:37,223
那你要記得讓聖誕老人進來喔
77
00:06:37,306 --> 00:06:38,849
好 -祝你們開心
78
00:06:38,933 --> 00:06:40,809
聖誕快樂 -聖誕快樂,艾爾
79
00:06:40,893 --> 00:06:42,853
聖誕快樂,楚蒂
80
00:06:42,937 --> 00:06:44,146
謝謝你,艾爾 -小事
81
00:07:13,259 --> 00:07:16,470
呵呵呵,聖誕快樂
82
00:07:17,012 --> 00:07:18,889
希望你在乖小孩名單上
83
00:07:35,322 --> 00:07:36,657
這是怎樣?
84
00:07:37,157 --> 00:07:39,326
你們是全世界最爛的外燴公司
85
00:07:39,410 --> 00:07:41,370
我說的是長不是寬
86
00:07:41,453 --> 00:07:42,580
真是的
87
00:07:59,805 --> 00:08:00,931
好
88
00:08:01,015 --> 00:08:03,100
大家好,聖誕快樂
89
00:08:03,601 --> 00:08:05,311
嗨 -不用了,謝謝你
90
00:08:05,394 --> 00:08:06,645
這看起來很棒
91
00:08:08,147 --> 00:08:11,400
我永遠不會習慣你是這樣長大的
92
00:08:12,902 --> 00:08:15,362
我的心理師也說我放不下這些
93
00:08:16,238 --> 00:08:17,698
我得喝一杯
94
00:08:22,870 --> 00:08:24,747
妳看這個
95
00:08:34,381 --> 00:08:36,467
嗨,琳達 -妳好
96
00:08:36,550 --> 00:08:38,344
最近好嗎,愛芙?
97
00:08:39,261 --> 00:08:40,679
妳變胖了
98
00:08:41,472 --> 00:08:43,057
但很適合妳
99
00:08:43,140 --> 00:08:44,350
謝謝
100
00:08:45,434 --> 00:08:46,518
你好嗎,弱雞?
101
00:08:47,603 --> 00:08:50,231
我覺得這個聖誕節一定會很讚
102
00:08:50,314 --> 00:08:52,149
想知道為什麼嗎? -請說
103
00:08:52,233 --> 00:08:55,819
因為我猜老媽今年只會出一張嘴了
104
00:08:55,903 --> 00:08:58,530
我們其中之一會接棒發號施令
105
00:08:58,614 --> 00:09:02,826
我得說,傑森,我可不會放過你
106
00:09:04,370 --> 00:09:07,748
萊史東家的聖誕節怎麼少得了
阿諛內鬥
107
00:09:09,291 --> 00:09:10,459
您的粉紅酒,夫人
108
00:09:10,543 --> 00:09:13,671
親愛的,笑一個,這是聖誕節欸
109
00:09:14,880 --> 00:09:16,590
好女孩
110
00:09:19,051 --> 00:09:22,054
我替我姐姐向妳道歉
111
00:09:27,434 --> 00:09:29,103
很高興見到妳
112
00:09:31,647 --> 00:09:32,815
謝謝妳來
113
00:09:37,361 --> 00:09:39,822
我錯過了什麼八卦,快幫我惡補
114
00:09:40,739 --> 00:09:42,408
八卦啊,好
115
00:09:44,201 --> 00:09:46,829
妳記得伯特,我姊的人生成就
116
00:09:46,912 --> 00:09:50,207
嘿唷,伯特駕到
117
00:09:50,291 --> 00:09:54,128
在平安夜大放光芒
118
00:09:55,504 --> 00:09:56,839
#天祐伯特
119
00:09:57,548 --> 00:09:59,425
我只能說他沒多久前
120
00:09:59,508 --> 00:10:02,595
被控告性騷擾,以後一定還有更多
121
00:10:03,137 --> 00:10:06,390
老媽捐錢給學校,蓋了萊史東體育館
122
00:10:06,473 --> 00:10:08,142
很像她會做的事
123
00:10:08,225 --> 00:10:09,560
那悲劇麥克呢?
124
00:10:10,102 --> 00:10:13,105
我只能說,要是我也搭了那時的飛機
125
00:10:13,188 --> 00:10:15,190
那9/11的結局就會是一群恐怖份子
126
00:10:15,274 --> 00:10:18,777
在康乃狄克州的天空體驗自由落體
127
00:10:19,445 --> 00:10:21,488
真讚! -是嗎?妳喜歡?
128
00:10:21,572 --> 00:10:22,907
我很喜歡 -太好了
129
00:10:23,407 --> 00:10:24,909
在我兒子前面親我
130
00:10:28,204 --> 00:10:30,915
說不定他其實是實力派
131
00:10:30,998 --> 00:10:34,752
他假裝我姊很辣的演技可以拿奧斯卡了
132
00:10:34,835 --> 00:10:37,171
現在他要老媽出錢讓他拍片
133
00:10:38,714 --> 00:10:40,674
不可能,我不會買帳的
134
00:10:40,758 --> 00:10:41,842
是葛楚!
135
00:10:41,926 --> 00:10:42,927
老媽來了
136
00:10:43,010 --> 00:10:44,929
來吧 -好,快點
137
00:10:45,012 --> 00:10:46,722
伯特,快過來就位 -媽,我不要
138
00:10:46,805 --> 00:10:47,890
該上場了 -好
139
00:10:47,973 --> 00:10:49,266
我這面比較好看 -我很忙
140
00:10:49,350 --> 00:10:51,435
我們練習過了,快 -老天,好
141
00:10:52,436 --> 00:10:54,438
伯特,去中間 -要開始了
142
00:10:54,521 --> 00:10:56,357
夠了,你知道這是怎麼回事
143
00:10:56,440 --> 00:10:58,817
我們要擠到前排嗎?
144
00:10:58,901 --> 00:10:59,902
不用
145
00:11:01,528 --> 00:11:02,988
我們可以待在後頭
146
00:11:04,198 --> 00:11:05,199
對
147
00:11:05,950 --> 00:11:07,076
楚蒂,親愛的
148
00:11:08,994 --> 00:11:10,412
過來這邊
149
00:11:12,289 --> 00:11:13,290
拜託…
150
00:11:14,291 --> 00:11:17,253
選擇威脅或賄賂,沒那麼難
151
00:11:17,336 --> 00:11:19,046
每次都這樣
152
00:11:20,047 --> 00:11:21,423
什麼?
153
00:11:22,091 --> 00:11:23,676
這就是你們的拿手絕活了?
154
00:11:23,759 --> 00:11:25,553
看到奶奶開心嗎?
155
00:11:25,636 --> 00:11:26,929
聽好,你們這些小混蛋
156
00:11:27,012 --> 00:11:30,140
現在可是聖誕節,
給我拿出你們的誠意
157
00:11:30,224 --> 00:11:33,727
包裝得美美的,
然後他媽的給我吞下去
158
00:11:34,979 --> 00:11:37,565
看來你們沒搞清楚我是誰
159
00:11:37,648 --> 00:11:40,859
奶奶都沒變呢 -喲,酷小子在後面啊
160
00:11:40,943 --> 00:11:42,194
就是啊,你在打什麼主意?
161
00:11:43,529 --> 00:11:45,739
沒有主意,我啥都不會做
162
00:11:45,823 --> 00:11:47,241
最好是
163
00:11:47,324 --> 00:11:49,076
不,不,不!
164
00:11:49,159 --> 00:11:51,912
少在那邊假好心想騙我吃屎
165
00:11:52,705 --> 00:11:53,789
奶奶真酷
166
00:11:53,873 --> 00:11:55,374
我會澄清那些謠言
167
00:11:55,457 --> 00:11:57,251
我覺得妳弟有什麼陰謀 -沒有
168
00:11:57,334 --> 00:12:00,796
我剛決定,今天讓你們
好好拍老媽馬屁
169
00:12:00,880 --> 00:12:03,632
最好是,你才是馬屁精
170
00:12:03,716 --> 00:12:05,634
你連小孩都取名葛楚
171
00:12:06,552 --> 00:12:09,263
愛芙,妳兒子叫做伯楚
172
00:12:09,805 --> 00:12:10,806
怎樣
173
00:12:10,890 --> 00:12:12,892
抱歉,伯特,
但那個名字是編的
174
00:12:12,975 --> 00:12:15,686
不好意思,不是每個人
都有幸能生女兒
175
00:12:15,769 --> 00:12:17,479
媽,我聽見了
176
00:12:18,898 --> 00:12:21,317
你知道什麼祕密?快說
177
00:12:21,400 --> 00:12:22,902
我什麼都不知道
178
00:12:22,985 --> 00:12:25,529
我懂了,我就知道你有鬼
179
00:12:25,613 --> 00:12:27,281
快說! -我們只是…
180
00:12:27,364 --> 00:12:28,616
快點…
181
00:12:28,699 --> 00:12:32,578
妳這個沒用的東西,難怪被老公拋棄
182
00:12:36,123 --> 00:12:38,083
也祝妳聖誕快樂,參議員
183
00:12:39,168 --> 00:12:41,503
聖誕快樂,媽咪 -聖誕快樂
184
00:12:42,338 --> 00:12:43,464
對,老媽 -聖誕快樂
185
00:12:43,547 --> 00:12:46,425
你們幹嘛都給我站在後面?
186
00:12:47,843 --> 00:12:49,553
聖誕快樂,奶奶!
187
00:12:49,637 --> 00:12:51,013
小賤貨
188
00:12:51,096 --> 00:12:54,558
小葛楚,我最愛的小孫女好嗎?
189
00:12:54,642 --> 00:12:56,435
大家現在都叫我楚蒂
190
00:12:57,019 --> 00:12:58,020
楚蒂?
191
00:12:59,730 --> 00:13:01,857
這名字聽起來很像妓女 -好了
192
00:13:02,691 --> 00:13:04,443
她根本不知道那個字的意思
193
00:13:04,526 --> 00:13:06,695
我餓死了,開動吧
194
00:13:06,779 --> 00:13:07,780
自大狂
195
00:13:08,280 --> 00:13:11,367
老媽,我覺得葛楚是個好聽的名字
196
00:13:11,450 --> 00:13:12,868
我只叫她葛楚
197
00:13:12,952 --> 00:13:14,995
聖誕快樂,葛楚 -夠了,伯楚
198
00:13:15,079 --> 00:13:16,080
(香草餅乾)
199
00:13:16,163 --> 00:13:18,207
當孩子們沉睡後
200
00:13:18,290 --> 00:13:20,918
輕輕地溜下樓梯
201
00:13:21,919 --> 00:13:25,256
鎖上所有的門窗
202
00:13:25,756 --> 00:13:29,468
只有你我和聖誕老人
203
00:13:29,552 --> 00:13:32,596
輕手輕腳 悄然無聲
204
00:13:33,389 --> 00:13:36,350
把玩具放在聖誕樹下
205
00:13:37,142 --> 00:13:40,479
趴在地上 匍匐前進
206
00:13:41,021 --> 00:13:44,316
只有你我和聖誕老人
207
00:13:53,158 --> 00:13:54,618
(禮物清單:錢 錢 錢 錢 電玩)
208
00:13:54,702 --> 00:13:56,370
魔幻時刻就快到來
209
00:13:56,453 --> 00:13:59,623
夜半鐘聲即將響起
210
00:14:00,165 --> 00:14:04,044
飛行雪橇終於飛走
211
00:14:04,128 --> 00:14:07,506
大家都會有個歡樂聖誕節
212
00:14:08,173 --> 00:14:11,468
向超級無敵棒的聖誕老人
213
00:14:11,969 --> 00:14:15,306
舉杯致敬
214
00:14:15,973 --> 00:14:19,310
只有你我和聖誕老人
215
00:14:19,393 --> 00:14:21,854
又是一個該死的聖誕節
216
00:14:25,733 --> 00:14:27,318
這些都是我自己做的
217
00:14:27,401 --> 00:14:28,903
太厲害了吧
218
00:14:28,986 --> 00:14:31,530
我還做了跟聖誕老人一模一樣的
219
00:14:31,614 --> 00:14:34,283
一模一樣 -對
220
00:14:34,366 --> 00:14:36,160
聖誕老人也有拐杖糖嗎?
221
00:14:36,243 --> 00:14:37,995
有 -好
222
00:14:40,581 --> 00:14:41,582
非常完美
223
00:14:42,124 --> 00:14:43,584
不准偷看喔
224
00:14:43,667 --> 00:14:46,587
這間房子有太多煙囪了
225
00:14:47,254 --> 00:14:49,381
聖誕老人怎麼知道要從哪個下來?
226
00:14:49,465 --> 00:14:51,008
他就是知道
227
00:14:51,383 --> 00:14:52,551
是聖誕節的魔法
228
00:14:56,138 --> 00:14:57,640
親愛的,怎麼了?
229
00:14:57,723 --> 00:15:00,726
爸拔今年沒帶我去購物中心
看聖誕老人
230
00:15:01,602 --> 00:15:03,270
沒有嗎?
231
00:15:06,273 --> 00:15:07,691
真的很對不起
232
00:15:10,694 --> 00:15:12,196
今年真的很奇怪
233
00:15:12,988 --> 00:15:16,200
我沒有機會跟聖誕老人說我想要什麼
234
00:15:16,909 --> 00:15:18,202
寶貝,過來這裡
235
00:15:22,248 --> 00:15:23,249
我告訴妳喔
236
00:15:24,708 --> 00:15:27,419
妳先去換睡衣
237
00:15:29,088 --> 00:15:31,590
等我兩分鐘
238
00:15:37,721 --> 00:15:38,722
好
239
00:15:41,600 --> 00:15:43,894
好唷
240
00:15:43,978 --> 00:15:45,521
什麼?是這個嗎?
241
00:15:45,604 --> 00:15:46,772
拜託,這個
242
00:15:52,361 --> 00:15:53,487
太好了
243
00:15:57,533 --> 00:15:58,534
搞定
244
00:16:00,953 --> 00:16:05,165
因為妳今年是爸媽的乖小孩
245
00:16:05,249 --> 00:16:10,963
我們決定妳可以先拿一個禮物
246
00:16:11,046 --> 00:16:12,172
真的嗎?
247
00:16:18,304 --> 00:16:19,471
這是什麼?
248
00:16:21,682 --> 00:16:24,560
這是一個很特殊的對講機
249
00:16:25,728 --> 00:16:27,771
魔法對講機 -魔法?
250
00:16:28,397 --> 00:16:30,524
妳手上這台
251
00:16:30,608 --> 00:16:33,193
是聖誕老人的直撥熱線
252
00:16:33,277 --> 00:16:35,279
我可以跟他講話? -對
253
00:16:35,362 --> 00:16:39,158
就像寫信那樣,只是更方便
254
00:16:40,868 --> 00:16:43,037
不過呢
255
00:16:43,120 --> 00:16:45,539
他不一定有空回答妳
256
00:16:45,623 --> 00:16:48,042
因為今晚他忙著到處發禮物
257
00:16:48,667 --> 00:16:51,253
但是他還是會聽見妳跟他說的話
258
00:16:58,177 --> 00:16:59,637
聖誕老人,你在嗎?
259
00:17:00,512 --> 00:17:02,264
我是楚蒂萊史東
260
00:17:03,557 --> 00:17:05,351
祝你今天晚上過得開心
261
00:17:07,644 --> 00:17:11,398
今天晚上很冷,別忘了戴手套
262
00:17:13,234 --> 00:17:16,111
我要跟你說,聖誕老人
263
00:17:16,654 --> 00:17:18,572
我今年特別乖
264
00:17:18,655 --> 00:17:22,034
所以我有很長的禮物清單要給你
265
00:17:23,619 --> 00:17:24,620
可是…
266
00:17:25,663 --> 00:17:28,874
我後來發現那些我都不想要
267
00:17:30,334 --> 00:17:33,045
我只想要一個聖誕禮物
268
00:17:35,256 --> 00:17:37,466
就是媽媽跟爸爸和好
269
00:17:38,801 --> 00:17:40,844
讓我們一家團聚
270
00:17:42,388 --> 00:17:43,389
好了
271
00:17:44,014 --> 00:17:45,307
晚安,聖誕老人
272
00:17:47,434 --> 00:17:48,852
晚安,兔兔先生
273
00:18:02,241 --> 00:18:03,868
是哪一個幹的?
274
00:18:04,994 --> 00:18:08,789
兩秒不拉屎都不行嗎?你們是鴿子嗎?
275
00:18:09,874 --> 00:18:12,459
超不專業的
276
00:18:16,255 --> 00:18:18,090
魯道夫就從來不會這樣
277
00:18:49,413 --> 00:18:50,456
自家手作
278
00:18:58,672 --> 00:18:59,798
脫脂牛奶
279
00:19:10,601 --> 00:19:13,520
這才對嘛
280
00:19:20,569 --> 00:19:21,570
(1938)
281
00:19:21,654 --> 00:19:25,866
{\an8}杜波斯的酒,戰前的好東西
282
00:19:26,700 --> 00:19:27,701
靠北讚
283
00:19:42,383 --> 00:19:43,634
很搭
284
00:19:44,176 --> 00:19:46,011
還有什麼呢?
285
00:20:02,611 --> 00:20:05,656
爽,這樣才對
286
00:20:15,833 --> 00:20:16,876
你知道嗎?
287
00:20:19,211 --> 00:20:20,713
聖誕節也沒關係
288
00:20:21,672 --> 00:20:24,884
但你們美國佬都不過我最愛的節日
289
00:20:26,093 --> 00:20:27,678
喔?什麼節日?
290
00:20:27,761 --> 00:20:29,221
打到骨折日
291
00:21:02,838 --> 00:21:06,091
唷,我是B萊史東,直播美夢中
292
00:21:06,634 --> 00:21:08,552
他們說富到流油的人…
293
00:21:10,054 --> 00:21:11,055
說再見吧
294
00:21:12,056 --> 00:21:13,057
如果你們…
295
00:21:14,225 --> 00:21:15,935
不,奶奶
296
00:21:16,018 --> 00:21:18,520
妳的網路爛死了,該死的
297
00:21:19,563 --> 00:21:21,899
他小時候我就拜託妳揍他了
298
00:21:39,500 --> 00:21:41,293
嘿,聖誕快樂
299
00:21:41,377 --> 00:21:44,046
還是應該說佳節愉快呢?
300
00:21:44,129 --> 00:21:46,340
大家怎麼都不統一一下啊?
301
00:21:46,423 --> 00:21:48,259
有何貴幹? -要請你幫個忙
302
00:21:48,342 --> 00:21:51,095
我的車拋錨了
303
00:21:51,178 --> 00:21:53,764
在這邊?這裡是私人土地
304
00:21:53,847 --> 00:21:54,890
我怎麼知道呢
305
00:21:54,974 --> 00:21:58,102
我走了好遠才看到這房子,我都凍壞了
306
00:21:58,185 --> 00:21:59,395
這裡到底是什麼鬼地方?
307
00:21:59,478 --> 00:22:02,940
這裡是萊史東莊園,我幫你叫拖車
308
00:22:08,779 --> 00:22:11,740
(萊宅)
309
00:22:12,783 --> 00:22:14,243
好了,壞蛋們
310
00:22:14,326 --> 00:22:17,371
準備聖誕開搶,完畢
311
00:22:17,454 --> 00:22:18,831
鈴鐺,好了
312
00:22:19,373 --> 00:22:21,625
薄荷,好了 -糖梅,好了
313
00:22:22,167 --> 00:22:24,962
坎卜斯,準備大鬧一場了
314
00:22:25,546 --> 00:22:26,922
拐杖糖,好了
315
00:22:27,006 --> 00:22:29,466
糖霜,沒問題 -金箔,沒問題
316
00:22:29,550 --> 00:22:31,385
薑餅,沒問題
317
00:22:31,468 --> 00:22:34,179
我們一定要用這些蠢代號嗎?
318
00:22:34,263 --> 00:22:35,723
這樣才有氣氛
319
00:22:36,432 --> 00:22:38,809
準備迎接你們最糟的聖誕節吧
320
00:22:40,561 --> 00:22:42,563
楚蒂最愛去購物中心看聖誕老人了
321
00:22:43,772 --> 00:22:45,441
她喜歡和父親一起去
322
00:22:45,524 --> 00:22:48,777
你昨天應該帶她去,就像每年那樣
323
00:22:48,861 --> 00:22:50,154
但你完全沒和我們聯絡
324
00:22:50,237 --> 00:22:52,448
老媽要我去做件特別的事,很複雜
325
00:22:52,531 --> 00:22:55,159
不是的,這種事情總是一再重演
326
00:22:55,242 --> 00:22:56,869
你媽媽強行介入我們之間
327
00:22:56,952 --> 00:22:57,995
妳說得對
328
00:23:02,666 --> 00:23:04,627
也許我們能實現楚蒂的願望?
329
00:23:05,920 --> 00:23:08,631
跟你媽度過浪漫週末會讓我回心轉意?
330
00:23:08,714 --> 00:23:12,218
如果這次真的不一樣呢?
331
00:23:14,470 --> 00:23:16,555
我們可以逃出我媽的掌控
332
00:23:17,181 --> 00:23:18,766
我們拋下一切
333
00:23:18,849 --> 00:23:21,101
離開公司、家族
334
00:23:24,480 --> 00:23:25,564
今晚就走
335
00:23:27,107 --> 00:23:28,525
你在打什麼主意?
336
00:24:13,904 --> 00:24:15,698
我們走 -妳要立刻離開
337
00:24:16,574 --> 00:24:17,950
媽咪,妳要去哪裡?
338
00:24:19,076 --> 00:24:20,703
她要去避難 -啊?
339
00:24:20,786 --> 00:24:22,204
對,快走,伯楚 -丟下我們?
340
00:24:28,002 --> 00:24:29,587
該死
341
00:24:51,817 --> 00:24:54,570
空間不夠所有人進去 -至少能再兩個
342
00:24:54,653 --> 00:24:56,113
媽,帶我進去 -媽!
343
00:24:56,822 --> 00:24:57,823
好
344
00:24:57,907 --> 00:24:59,158
媽,伯特也能進去嗎?
345
00:25:01,785 --> 00:25:03,704
好,不快點就死定了,快
346
00:25:05,414 --> 00:25:06,665
你們應該保護我們
347
00:25:06,749 --> 00:25:08,209
我們保護主要資產
348
00:25:12,421 --> 00:25:13,672
你是什麼人?
349
00:25:14,215 --> 00:25:16,342
你可以叫我小氣財神
350
00:25:17,343 --> 00:25:18,594
真好笑
351
00:25:18,677 --> 00:25:20,012
抓住他
352
00:25:29,230 --> 00:25:31,023
去死吧,混蛋
353
00:25:40,491 --> 00:25:41,659
嘿,閃開
354
00:25:44,078 --> 00:25:46,413
金箔、薄荷,去樓上搜一搜
355
00:25:46,497 --> 00:25:48,499
把萊史東家的人都抓過來
356
00:25:49,458 --> 00:25:51,085
其他的人格殺勿論
357
00:26:01,428 --> 00:26:04,056
靠!
358
00:26:05,224 --> 00:26:07,101
楚蒂,親愛的,我們要走了
359
00:26:09,186 --> 00:26:10,187
醒醒,寶貝,醒醒
360
00:26:10,271 --> 00:26:12,648
說不定能從僕役用樓梯逃走
361
00:26:20,030 --> 00:26:22,074
拜託,不會吧,就這麼巧!
362
00:26:22,616 --> 00:26:24,952
靠!
363
00:26:25,953 --> 00:26:27,872
懈寄生、薑餅
364
00:26:51,478 --> 00:26:52,521
嘿
365
00:26:56,984 --> 00:26:59,528
被你發現了
366
00:27:00,279 --> 00:27:02,114
我不想惹麻煩,好嗎?
367
00:27:02,197 --> 00:27:03,824
立刻跟我下樓
368
00:27:04,533 --> 00:27:06,702
聽我說,先生
369
00:27:07,328 --> 00:27:11,373
我不想淌渾水,我還有正事要辦
370
00:27:11,999 --> 00:27:13,792
所以我要拿起我的袋子
371
00:27:14,501 --> 00:27:16,378
從煙囪爬出去
372
00:27:18,756 --> 00:27:20,341
廢話少說,走了
373
00:27:21,634 --> 00:27:22,968
你惹錯人了
374
00:27:23,052 --> 00:27:24,261
什麼?你嗎?
375
00:27:25,971 --> 00:27:27,348
現在下樓
376
00:27:28,682 --> 00:27:30,726
你聾了嗎?他媽的給我站起來
377
00:27:42,363 --> 00:27:43,906
不…
378
00:27:43,989 --> 00:27:46,575
不,等等!
379
00:27:47,535 --> 00:27:48,536
等一下
380
00:27:48,619 --> 00:27:51,997
等一下,別走,回來啊!
381
00:29:07,531 --> 00:29:08,741
媽的咧
382
00:29:33,515 --> 00:29:34,516
糟糕
383
00:29:56,413 --> 00:29:59,333
那些膽小鬼馴鹿居然棄我不顧
384
00:30:08,425 --> 00:30:14,348
暴戾夜,血腥夜
385
00:30:14,431 --> 00:30:17,059
別亂動
386
00:30:17,142 --> 00:30:20,646
如果你們不想被爆頭
387
00:30:21,689 --> 00:30:22,940
真可愛
388
00:30:23,023 --> 00:30:26,026
你知道你惹了什麼人嗎?
389
00:30:29,697 --> 00:30:32,074
我當然知道自己惹了什麼人
390
00:30:33,075 --> 00:30:34,410
等等,難道妳真的以為
391
00:30:34,493 --> 00:30:37,746
我籌畫了好幾個月的縝密行動
392
00:30:37,830 --> 00:30:40,499
要闖入全國保全最嚴密的住家
393
00:30:40,583 --> 00:30:42,501
卻不知道住在裡面的人是誰?
394
00:30:42,585 --> 00:30:43,669
這妳就錯了
395
00:30:44,545 --> 00:30:48,340
因為妳的人都死了,保全也死了
396
00:30:48,424 --> 00:30:51,927
所以給我坐下,閉上妳的臭嘴!
397
00:31:21,040 --> 00:31:22,041
靠
398
00:31:25,920 --> 00:31:28,380
沒事的,只要幾分鐘就可以搞定
399
00:31:28,464 --> 00:31:29,465
最好是能搞定
400
00:31:29,548 --> 00:31:32,301
這情節好像我最愛的電影《暗夜贖金》
401
00:31:32,384 --> 00:31:33,385
我的天
402
00:31:34,637 --> 00:31:36,055
只要他們沒有槍
403
00:31:36,138 --> 00:31:38,224
我就能打倒其中三、四個人吧
404
00:31:38,307 --> 00:31:39,642
全部打倒不是更好
405
00:31:40,935 --> 00:31:42,853
媽,好噁
406
00:31:42,937 --> 00:31:44,396
你如果真的做了功課
407
00:31:44,480 --> 00:31:47,483
就會知道我哥哥羅瑞70年代被綁架過
408
00:31:48,400 --> 00:31:50,569
但我爸完全沒有聯絡警察
409
00:31:51,278 --> 00:31:53,739
他派出我們私人的搶救小組
410
00:31:53,822 --> 00:31:56,325
羅瑞一個星期後毫髮無傷地回家了
411
00:31:57,743 --> 00:31:59,912
綁架犯從此人間蒸發
412
00:32:01,247 --> 00:32:02,623
你懂我意思吧
413
00:32:04,625 --> 00:32:05,876
我知道
414
00:32:05,960 --> 00:32:08,754
我知道妳家的搶救小組
415
00:32:08,837 --> 00:32:12,258
你們私下的暱稱是“殺人特攻隊”
416
00:32:12,341 --> 00:32:14,343
我也知道他們正在路上
417
00:32:14,426 --> 00:32:16,178
也知道他們要多久時間會到
418
00:32:16,262 --> 00:32:20,432
我還知道他們的雞雞評分,妳懂嗎?
419
00:32:20,516 --> 00:32:22,810
那你就知道自己死定了
420
00:32:23,310 --> 00:32:24,895
我們不會付贖金
421
00:32:24,979 --> 00:32:27,565
我說了,我都知道
422
00:32:27,648 --> 00:32:30,818
我知道的可多了,葛楚,真的
423
00:32:31,610 --> 00:32:35,155
像是妳現在有三億美元現金
424
00:32:35,239 --> 00:32:37,324
放在樓下的私人金庫裡
425
00:32:37,408 --> 00:32:39,410
什麼? -沒錯
426
00:32:39,493 --> 00:32:42,872
美國政府給萊史東家的三億美元
427
00:32:42,955 --> 00:32:46,917
準備發給中東那些人渣
428
00:32:47,001 --> 00:32:51,213
打通關節,讓原油順暢流動
429
00:32:51,297 --> 00:32:55,551
三億美元,哇咧,在戰火中就沒了
430
00:32:55,634 --> 00:32:58,137
但也不是真的沒了,對吧,葛楚?
431
00:32:58,679 --> 00:33:00,014
因為被妳偷走了
432
00:33:00,097 --> 00:33:03,100
你都知道? -唉,這家人啊
433
00:33:03,183 --> 00:33:06,270
這貪財的一家
434
00:33:06,353 --> 00:33:08,147
死命抓著你們的錢財
435
00:33:08,230 --> 00:33:12,026
而你們的員工窮到沒錢買煤取暖
436
00:33:12,109 --> 00:33:14,528
你講這麼多聖誕節鬼話有屁用?
437
00:33:15,779 --> 00:33:19,450
講再多你也進不了金庫
438
00:33:20,242 --> 00:33:24,747
因為妳按了緊急按鈕,密碼已經改了?
439
00:33:24,830 --> 00:33:27,708
要講幾遍,我都知道
440
00:33:33,214 --> 00:33:35,925
現在闖進金庫還要這樣搞?
441
00:33:36,592 --> 00:33:40,512
記得以前只要鑽洞炸掉就好的日子嗎?
442
00:33:40,596 --> 00:33:43,724
我大概是老了,不過那樣還挺浪漫的
443
00:33:44,266 --> 00:33:45,309
老大,聽到了嗎?
444
00:33:46,143 --> 00:33:47,311
我現在有點忙
445
00:33:47,811 --> 00:33:49,313
你最好來看一下
446
00:33:59,823 --> 00:34:00,866
他可能摔下來了
447
00:34:01,367 --> 00:34:03,202
妳和他一起從大樓垂降過
448
00:34:03,285 --> 00:34:05,454
卻覺得他會從窗戶跌下來?
449
00:34:06,288 --> 00:34:08,749
大家打起精神,敵暗我明
450
00:34:25,307 --> 00:34:30,896
我覺得兔兔先生想睡了
451
00:34:30,980 --> 00:34:33,732
我們讓他睡覺好嗎?
452
00:34:35,568 --> 00:34:36,859
沒事的
453
00:34:51,332 --> 00:34:55,044
聖誕老人,你在嗎?
454
00:35:01,427 --> 00:35:02,678
該死
455
00:35:07,933 --> 00:35:09,894
拐杖糖在第三檢查點
456
00:35:11,103 --> 00:35:12,479
該死…
457
00:35:12,563 --> 00:35:13,731
該死
458
00:35:16,525 --> 00:35:17,818
電玩遊戲
459
00:35:19,612 --> 00:35:20,779
電玩遊戲
460
00:35:20,863 --> 00:35:25,409
沒有人許願球棒、寶劍或汽油彈嗎?
461
00:35:34,835 --> 00:35:35,836
等等
462
00:35:51,936 --> 00:35:53,229
媽咪,我愛妳
463
00:35:54,438 --> 00:35:55,564
詩集
464
00:35:56,523 --> 00:35:58,317
藍光版《終極警探》,媽的!
465
00:36:01,403 --> 00:36:02,488
我的媽啊
466
00:36:02,571 --> 00:36:04,782
我的媽啊 哦嗚
467
00:36:04,865 --> 00:36:06,825
聖誕老人在哪裡?
468
00:36:06,909 --> 00:36:08,702
我的媽啊 哦嗚
469
00:36:08,786 --> 00:36:10,871
聖誕老人在哪裡?
470
00:36:10,955 --> 00:36:11,956
我的媽啊 哦嗚
471
00:36:12,039 --> 00:36:13,415
他帶來的玩具呢?
472
00:36:13,499 --> 00:36:14,959
保險沒開,廢物
473
00:36:16,794 --> 00:36:18,170
我的媽啊
474
00:36:18,254 --> 00:36:20,172
我的媽啊 哦嗚
475
00:36:20,256 --> 00:36:22,383
聖誕老人在哪裡?
476
00:36:22,466 --> 00:36:23,759
我的媽啊 哦嗚
477
00:36:23,842 --> 00:36:25,678
我正在找他 因為
478
00:36:25,761 --> 00:36:27,638
等等,你等一下
479
00:36:27,721 --> 00:36:28,973
今晚是平安夜
480
00:36:29,056 --> 00:36:30,140
等一下
481
00:36:30,766 --> 00:36:33,060
聽好,我不想殺你
482
00:36:33,143 --> 00:36:36,063
我知道我應該乖乖睡覺
483
00:36:37,064 --> 00:36:40,818
“哇,又高又胖的白鬍子傢伙”
484
00:36:40,901 --> 00:36:43,320
但我還是偷偷瞄瞄窗外
485
00:36:43,404 --> 00:36:44,446
聖誕老人
486
00:36:45,656 --> 00:36:47,408
我他媽的要抓爆你的蛋蛋
487
00:36:50,202 --> 00:36:52,246
希望他不會忘記
488
00:36:52,329 --> 00:36:54,498
敲打他的響板
489
00:36:54,582 --> 00:36:58,127
呼喚他的馴鹿
490
00:36:58,210 --> 00:37:00,087
喔 潘丘 喔 悍妞
491
00:37:00,170 --> 00:37:01,171
喔 佩卓 喔 閃電
492
00:37:01,255 --> 00:37:02,256
靠
493
00:37:02,339 --> 00:37:03,465
喔耶
494
00:37:03,549 --> 00:37:06,218
喔耶 喔耶
495
00:37:06,302 --> 00:37:07,469
我的媽啊
496
00:37:07,553 --> 00:37:09,805
我的媽啊 哦嗚
497
00:37:09,889 --> 00:37:11,515
聖誕老人在哪裡?
498
00:37:11,599 --> 00:37:12,683
我的媽啊 哦嗚
499
00:37:12,766 --> 00:37:15,519
聖誕老人在哪裡?
500
00:37:15,603 --> 00:37:17,271
我的媽啊 哦嗚
501
00:37:17,354 --> 00:37:20,107
今晚是平安夜
502
00:37:29,909 --> 00:37:31,493
希望他不會忘記
503
00:37:31,994 --> 00:37:33,579
敲打他的響板
504
00:37:33,662 --> 00:37:37,499
呼喚他的馴鹿
505
00:37:38,167 --> 00:37:39,543
喔 潘丘 喔 悍妞
506
00:37:39,627 --> 00:37:41,420
喔 佩卓 喔 閃電
507
00:37:41,503 --> 00:37:42,838
喔耶
508
00:37:42,922 --> 00:37:45,341
喔耶 喔耶
509
00:37:45,424 --> 00:37:46,675
我的媽啊
510
00:37:46,759 --> 00:37:48,302
我的媽啊 哦嗚
511
00:37:48,385 --> 00:37:51,013
聖誕老人在哪裡?
512
00:37:51,931 --> 00:37:54,642
聖誕老人在哪裡?
513
00:37:54,725 --> 00:37:56,227
我的媽啊 哦嗚
514
00:37:56,310 --> 00:37:59,271
今晚是平安夜
515
00:38:00,147 --> 00:38:02,066
今晚是平安夜
516
00:38:02,149 --> 00:38:03,776
我的媽啊
517
00:38:03,859 --> 00:38:05,903
今晚是平安夜
518
00:38:05,986 --> 00:38:07,238
我的媽啊
519
00:38:48,529 --> 00:38:49,530
老天
520
00:38:56,829 --> 00:39:00,207
拐杖糖回報,莊園一切正常安全
521
00:39:02,126 --> 00:39:04,253
收到,殺人特攻隊怎麼樣了?
522
00:39:05,379 --> 00:39:07,464
殺人特攻隊還要兩小時才會到
523
00:39:07,548 --> 00:39:10,467
我們一切順利,已經突破外層了
524
00:39:10,551 --> 00:39:12,469
這可以報警嗎?
525
00:39:14,138 --> 00:39:15,139
我…
526
00:39:15,806 --> 00:39:17,182
我這樣做對嗎?
527
00:39:17,266 --> 00:39:18,601
有人嗎?
528
00:39:18,684 --> 00:39:20,561
有人聽見我的聲音嗎?
529
00:39:20,644 --> 00:39:22,062
聖誕老人,你在嗎?
530
00:39:25,149 --> 00:39:26,150
誰?
531
00:39:26,233 --> 00:39:27,651
聖誕老人?
532
00:39:30,905 --> 00:39:32,531
對,我是聖誕老人
533
00:39:35,743 --> 00:39:37,620
希望我沒有打擾你
534
00:39:39,663 --> 00:39:42,082
爸拔說你今晚很忙
535
00:39:44,168 --> 00:39:45,169
我…
536
00:39:46,295 --> 00:39:47,838
剛好在休息
537
00:39:48,631 --> 00:39:50,299
妳叫什麼名字啊?
538
00:39:52,885 --> 00:39:54,845
我的名字是楚蒂萊史東
539
00:39:54,929 --> 00:39:57,306
我今年都很乖
540
00:39:58,974 --> 00:40:00,184
楚蒂
541
00:40:02,728 --> 00:40:04,271
楚蒂萊史東
542
00:40:04,813 --> 00:40:06,065
(乖孩子 楚蒂萊史東)
543
00:40:06,148 --> 00:40:07,524
(對動物友善、聽爸媽的話)
544
00:40:07,608 --> 00:40:08,692
(邀請怪咖參加派對)
545
00:40:08,776 --> 00:40:10,319
(房間整潔、對人和善 )
546
00:40:13,364 --> 00:40:14,615
對,楚蒂
547
00:40:15,824 --> 00:40:17,368
妳在我的乖孩子名單上
548
00:40:18,202 --> 00:40:20,204
妳今年是很乖的孩子
549
00:40:22,122 --> 00:40:23,624
楚蒂,妳現在在哪裡?
550
00:40:25,543 --> 00:40:28,504
我和全家族在一個大房間裡
551
00:40:28,587 --> 00:40:31,507
有兩個拿槍的壞人在監視我們
552
00:40:34,134 --> 00:40:35,135
{\an8}(壞孩子)
553
00:40:35,219 --> 00:40:36,554
{\an8}還有六個
554
00:40:36,637 --> 00:40:38,055
{\an8}你能不能來救我們,聖誕老人?
555
00:40:39,974 --> 00:40:41,642
好,我當然會去救妳
556
00:40:41,725 --> 00:40:43,894
我會…我會把妳救出來
557
00:40:44,395 --> 00:40:47,606
抓走那些在壞孩子名單上的壞人
558
00:40:48,649 --> 00:40:50,693
我會拿出大塊的煤炭
559
00:40:51,402 --> 00:40:54,989
一個壞孩子一塊,直接塞到他們的…
560
00:40:55,072 --> 00:40:56,073
屁股裡
561
00:40:59,535 --> 00:41:00,953
等等,親愛的
562
00:41:01,036 --> 00:41:03,497
我們還想讓妳留在乖孩子名單上
563
00:41:05,332 --> 00:41:07,459
對不起,那“屁眼”可以嗎?
564
00:41:08,252 --> 00:41:09,795
這算是擦邊球吧
565
00:41:09,879 --> 00:41:11,589
那“肛門”呢?
566
00:41:12,172 --> 00:41:15,551
嚴格來說,這算專有名…
567
00:41:16,051 --> 00:41:17,761
好了,楚蒂
568
00:41:17,845 --> 00:41:20,472
我要找幫手,但電話線不通
569
00:41:20,556 --> 00:41:22,933
妳應該很熟悉這間房子
570
00:41:23,434 --> 00:41:24,685
有什麼建議嗎?
571
00:41:25,227 --> 00:41:26,520
我想到了
572
00:41:29,273 --> 00:41:33,235
你是說有一個天殺的聖誕老人在這裡?
573
00:41:37,156 --> 00:41:40,451
他該死的看起來很歡樂,到底是誰?
574
00:41:40,534 --> 00:41:42,328
員工名單上沒有聖誕老人
575
00:41:42,411 --> 00:41:43,913
對,還有一件事
576
00:41:43,996 --> 00:41:46,081
糖霜沒有回報,我找不到他
577
00:41:46,165 --> 00:41:47,416
好,繼續找
578
00:41:50,836 --> 00:41:53,339
正式宣布,有漏網之魚在搗蛋
579
00:41:53,422 --> 00:41:54,882
他很危險,你們要小心
580
00:42:00,387 --> 00:42:02,514
艾爾,艾爾!
581
00:42:08,979 --> 00:42:10,314
太糟糕了
582
00:42:19,156 --> 00:42:20,199
該死
583
00:42:20,282 --> 00:42:23,035
糖霜,你現在怎麼樣?
584
00:42:26,872 --> 00:42:28,832
糖霜,完畢
585
00:42:31,919 --> 00:42:33,420
糖霜?
586
00:42:34,505 --> 00:42:37,591
我在地下室碰到的那個壞蛋嗎?
587
00:42:37,675 --> 00:42:39,134
你朋友死了
588
00:42:39,218 --> 00:42:42,846
他被星星砸到臉,然後頭著火了
589
00:42:42,930 --> 00:42:44,390
說來話長
590
00:42:47,351 --> 00:42:49,436
你就是我們的聖誕老人嗎?
591
00:42:49,520 --> 00:42:52,314
我們親愛的聖誕老人嗎?
592
00:42:52,398 --> 00:42:53,774
對,我就是
593
00:42:55,150 --> 00:42:56,610
請問你是哪位?
594
00:42:56,694 --> 00:42:58,612
今天晚上我叫做小氣財神
595
00:42:58,696 --> 00:43:02,575
請問你到底想幹嘛,聖誕老人?
596
00:43:02,658 --> 00:43:05,119
我要你們放下武器
597
00:43:06,078 --> 00:43:08,080
我要你們放過這家人
598
00:43:08,831 --> 00:43:10,291
然後我要找到我的馴鹿
599
00:43:10,374 --> 00:43:12,710
繼續去發禮物
600
00:43:15,462 --> 00:43:16,714
你他媽的跟我開玩笑嗎?
601
00:43:17,381 --> 00:43:19,049
好了,你到底是誰?
602
00:43:19,133 --> 00:43:21,594
是看太多動作片的保全嗎?
603
00:43:21,677 --> 00:43:24,930
還是失業的遜警察在購物中心cosplay
604
00:43:25,014 --> 00:43:27,975
有胖小子在你大腿撒尿嗎?說中了吧?
605
00:43:28,058 --> 00:43:29,852
比你說的還要複雜一點
606
00:43:29,935 --> 00:43:31,812
我覺得不會
607
00:43:31,896 --> 00:43:33,731
因為這是我個人的任務
608
00:43:33,814 --> 00:43:36,108
我的佳節待辦事項
609
00:43:36,191 --> 00:43:38,277
就是找到你,除掉你
610
00:43:38,360 --> 00:43:41,822
用你來擦屁股,度過這個爛節日
611
00:43:41,906 --> 00:43:44,283
這就是我要的聖誕禮物,聖誕老人
612
00:43:44,366 --> 00:43:48,495
你聖誕節的願望真是糟糕
613
00:43:49,163 --> 00:43:51,999
但也許我應該跟你當面討論一下
614
00:43:53,584 --> 00:43:55,628
“聖誕老人要來了”
615
00:44:07,765 --> 00:44:08,766
該死的
616
00:44:18,859 --> 00:44:22,738
誰找了扮裝聖誕老人來參加聖誕趴?
617
00:44:22,821 --> 00:44:26,909
是誰來這個爛爆的聖誕趴扮聖誕老人?
618
00:44:26,992 --> 00:44:29,161
我沒有找聖誕老人
619
00:44:29,245 --> 00:44:31,372
我從來不找聖誕老人,超俗的
620
00:44:32,039 --> 00:44:33,290
那他是誰?
621
00:44:37,920 --> 00:44:39,088
他是誰?
622
00:44:39,171 --> 00:44:42,800
你們最好快招,不然我砸爛你們的頭
623
00:44:44,260 --> 00:44:48,138
該死,葛楚,妳真的很喜歡胡桃鉗吧?
624
00:44:49,181 --> 00:44:53,686
我要折磨妳的每一個家人
625
00:44:53,769 --> 00:44:57,898
直到有人說出那個亂跑的
聖誕老人是誰
626
00:44:57,982 --> 00:44:59,483
居然壞了我的好事
627
00:44:59,567 --> 00:45:01,068
先選誰好呢?
628
00:45:01,944 --> 00:45:03,320
是不是按照年齡呢?
629
00:45:04,405 --> 00:45:06,156
還是按照智商?
630
00:45:07,116 --> 00:45:09,451
選傑森,我媽最喜歡他了
631
00:45:09,535 --> 00:45:11,495
對,選他 -穿毛衣的那個
632
00:45:11,579 --> 00:45:13,956
好,就從傑森萊史東開始
633
00:45:14,039 --> 00:45:16,417
寶貝兒子 -等一等
634
00:45:16,500 --> 00:45:18,836
不用這樣的,沒關係
635
00:45:18,919 --> 00:45:21,463
不,不,不,我們不用這樣
636
00:45:21,547 --> 00:45:23,090
不,不要…
637
00:45:23,173 --> 00:45:25,467
不要,不要放…不
638
00:45:25,551 --> 00:45:26,844
不…
639
00:45:26,927 --> 00:45:29,096
把手指交出來 -等一下
640
00:45:33,100 --> 00:45:34,310
爸拔!
641
00:45:36,562 --> 00:45:39,356
我說了,沒人找聖誕老人來
642
00:45:39,440 --> 00:45:40,733
好啦,妳說的是
643
00:45:40,816 --> 00:45:43,068
住手,住手,我們幹嘛呢
644
00:45:43,152 --> 00:45:47,239
好了,我們是外行人嗎?很不專業欸
645
00:45:47,323 --> 00:45:50,826
好了,這可不是手指鉗
646
00:45:52,161 --> 00:45:54,747
拐杖糖,把他的蛋蛋塞進去
647
00:45:54,830 --> 00:45:56,290
我才不要摸他的蛋蛋
648
00:45:56,373 --> 00:46:00,085
怎麼變公主了?妳連腦袋都用手挖過
649
00:46:00,169 --> 00:46:02,213
你要我把他的腦袋挖出來,我就照做
650
00:46:02,296 --> 00:46:04,840
但我不要摸他的蛋蛋 -隨便誰都好
651
00:46:04,924 --> 00:46:08,385
但三秒後,我要看到他的蛋變荷包蛋
652
00:46:08,469 --> 00:46:09,470
我來
653
00:46:10,304 --> 00:46:11,597
坎卜斯,做得好
654
00:46:11,680 --> 00:46:13,933
不要他 -所以我最喜歡反社會人格了
655
00:46:14,016 --> 00:46:15,809
總是喜歡嘗試新事物 -等一下
656
00:46:15,893 --> 00:46:18,354
不用這樣嘛,沒關係的
657
00:46:18,437 --> 00:46:21,565
不,不要,我的天哪
658
00:46:21,649 --> 00:46:24,026
我的天哪…
659
00:46:25,778 --> 00:46:28,697
把你的胡桃放進去,真好吃
660
00:46:29,240 --> 00:46:30,866
不要傷害我爸拔
661
00:46:31,408 --> 00:46:33,202
不然聖誕老人會生氣
662
00:46:35,829 --> 00:46:36,956
真是小可愛
663
00:46:37,581 --> 00:46:39,333
妳認識聖誕老人嗎?
664
00:46:39,416 --> 00:46:40,751
她什麼都不知道
665
00:46:41,710 --> 00:46:43,003
他沒有問你
666
00:46:43,546 --> 00:46:46,257
她只是愛幻想
667
00:46:46,340 --> 00:46:48,008
她假裝自己在跟聖誕老人說話
668
00:46:48,551 --> 00:46:50,344
不是假裝,聖誕老人是我朋友
669
00:46:50,427 --> 00:46:52,930
他說要來救我們 -不
670
00:46:53,013 --> 00:46:55,641
還會揍扁你們 -是嗎?
671
00:46:55,724 --> 00:46:58,978
那妳應該可以叫他出來,不要躲了吧?
672
00:46:59,770 --> 00:47:01,855
妳要不要和我一起跟他玩個遊戲?
673
00:47:01,939 --> 00:47:04,400
楚蒂,說實話,
妳沒有跟聖誕老人說話
674
00:47:04,483 --> 00:47:06,569
我有 -不,妳沒有,快說實話
675
00:47:06,652 --> 00:47:09,113
我有 -該死,楚蒂,聖誕老人是假的
676
00:47:18,080 --> 00:47:19,123
很抱歉,親愛的
677
00:47:20,791 --> 00:47:24,128
聖誕老人是大人騙小孩的
678
00:47:27,214 --> 00:47:30,759
禮物是我們給的,再騙妳是聖誕老人
679
00:47:32,428 --> 00:47:34,513
他不會來救我們,他不存在
680
00:47:36,265 --> 00:47:37,433
這些都是假的
681
00:47:39,810 --> 00:47:40,811
真的嗎?
682
00:47:41,729 --> 00:47:44,440
沒想到妳會這樣發現聖誕老人的真相
683
00:47:44,523 --> 00:47:47,610
復活節我們再來戳破復活節兔子好了
684
00:47:49,278 --> 00:47:50,779
楚蒂! -快回來!
685
00:47:50,863 --> 00:47:52,740
你們這些笨蛋,堅守崗位
686
00:47:52,823 --> 00:47:54,199
楚蒂!
687
00:47:54,283 --> 00:47:55,910
我會找到這個小混蛋
688
00:49:03,102 --> 00:49:04,103
好
689
00:49:14,905 --> 00:49:15,906
好喔
690
00:49:32,339 --> 00:49:33,382
聖誕老人
691
00:49:34,174 --> 00:49:36,594
聖誕老人,聖誕老人!
692
00:49:39,805 --> 00:49:41,098
我是楚蒂
693
00:49:42,099 --> 00:49:43,475
你還好嗎,聖誕老人?
694
00:49:47,521 --> 00:49:49,732
嗨,我在 -你還好嗎?
695
00:49:50,649 --> 00:49:51,650
我沒事
696
00:49:52,818 --> 00:49:54,278
我只是在包東西
697
00:49:55,362 --> 00:49:56,947
我逃走了,躲在閣樓
698
00:49:57,031 --> 00:49:59,116
好,如果妳現在安全
699
00:50:00,784 --> 00:50:03,662
就安靜待在那,不要亂跑
700
00:50:03,746 --> 00:50:06,040
好,我可以設陷阱
701
00:50:06,874 --> 00:50:08,125
就像《小鬼當家》那樣
702
00:50:08,209 --> 00:50:11,337
好,我不知道妳在說什麼,但就做吧
703
00:50:11,420 --> 00:50:12,755
但不要發出聲音
704
00:50:14,924 --> 00:50:16,717
你真的是聖誕老人嗎?
705
00:50:20,846 --> 00:50:22,473
我當然是,親愛的
706
00:50:23,599 --> 00:50:25,935
我爸爸說沒有聖誕老人
707
00:50:28,187 --> 00:50:32,650
他說禮物是爸媽買的,
聖誕老人是假的
708
00:50:33,317 --> 00:50:37,363
他說他們只是騙我們是聖誕老人送的
709
00:50:38,072 --> 00:50:39,073
對
710
00:50:40,199 --> 00:50:42,243
對,很多爸媽都那樣說
711
00:50:42,326 --> 00:50:46,080
但是我還是會送禮物給需要我的孩子
712
00:50:47,790 --> 00:50:49,416
那些真的相信我的孩子
713
00:50:51,460 --> 00:50:53,420
你怎麼知道誰真的需要你?
714
00:50:54,630 --> 00:50:58,259
聖誕節魔法,我也不知道是什麼原理
715
00:51:06,267 --> 00:51:07,268
但是
716
00:51:10,729 --> 00:51:11,981
我記得
717
00:51:14,108 --> 00:51:16,443
楚蒂萊史東寫信給我的時候
718
00:51:16,527 --> 00:51:18,821
她應該是六歲吧
719
00:51:19,321 --> 00:51:21,657
她說自己有時候覺得很孤單
720
00:51:22,199 --> 00:51:24,451
她很想念以前有好朋友的時候
721
00:51:24,535 --> 00:51:27,705
所以我送給她一隻兔兔填充玩偶
722
00:51:27,788 --> 00:51:28,956
兔兔先生
723
00:51:29,039 --> 00:51:31,083
我記得隔一年
724
00:51:31,166 --> 00:51:35,754
妳說自己做了好夢,然後
725
00:51:35,838 --> 00:51:38,591
妳只想要… -飛高高!
726
00:51:38,674 --> 00:51:40,885
飛,飛高…
727
00:51:42,386 --> 00:51:43,804
我的意思是
728
00:51:44,513 --> 00:51:50,185
雖然有魔法,但讓小女孩飛就有點…
729
00:51:53,105 --> 00:51:55,149
但是我可以給妳風箏
730
00:51:56,984 --> 00:51:58,986
在雲的下方飄
731
00:51:59,987 --> 00:52:02,823
我盡力了
732
00:52:02,907 --> 00:52:04,116
我就知道
733
00:52:04,742 --> 00:52:06,744
我就知道你是真的,聖誕老人
734
00:52:09,788 --> 00:52:11,999
不要怪妳爸媽,好嗎?
735
00:52:14,752 --> 00:52:17,046
大人有時候很難相信一些事
736
00:52:19,256 --> 00:52:23,052
你能用聖誕魔法讓他們重新相愛嗎?
737
00:52:23,135 --> 00:52:25,346
我也希望自己有那種力量
738
00:52:26,388 --> 00:52:31,101
我和聖誕奶奶已經結婚1100年了
739
00:52:31,185 --> 00:52:32,186
我們…
740
00:52:33,312 --> 00:52:35,773
大人的感情很複雜
741
00:52:36,857 --> 00:52:38,025
需要努力
742
00:52:39,360 --> 00:52:40,527
很多的努力
743
00:52:43,364 --> 00:52:44,740
你還愛她嗎?
744
00:52:46,033 --> 00:52:47,409
我愛她
745
00:52:48,661 --> 00:52:51,580
但有時候,就算你想讓某人幸福
746
00:52:53,374 --> 00:52:55,376
魔法還是會消失
747
00:52:58,337 --> 00:52:59,338
嘿
748
00:53:00,381 --> 00:53:01,924
我有個想法
749
00:53:02,675 --> 00:53:04,260
這樣一定很好玩
750
00:53:04,343 --> 00:53:08,097
你們不如來開禮物吧?
751
00:53:09,181 --> 00:53:13,352
我想看你們這些有錢的
混蛋都送些什麼
752
00:53:13,435 --> 00:53:17,356
而且你們可能有人活不到明天
753
00:53:18,774 --> 00:53:20,943
這就是開禮物唯一的機會了
754
00:53:22,403 --> 00:53:25,531
拜託,有點聖誕精神吧?
755
00:53:31,036 --> 00:53:35,082
葛楚,我幫妳準備了很特別的東西
756
00:53:35,165 --> 00:53:38,502
聽到了嗎,葛楚?他有好東西給妳
757
00:53:39,169 --> 00:53:40,713
會是什麼呢?
758
00:53:41,463 --> 00:53:43,632
我的天,好刺激喔
759
00:53:43,716 --> 00:53:44,717
媽
760
00:53:46,385 --> 00:53:47,595
我可以叫妳媽嗎?
761
00:53:48,888 --> 00:53:50,472
萊史東夫人
762
00:53:52,433 --> 00:53:56,478
在業界,這個叫做提案集
763
00:53:56,562 --> 00:53:57,980
(投資人財務規畫)
764
00:53:59,148 --> 00:54:00,149
提案集
765
00:54:00,232 --> 00:54:03,777
這部片叫做《爆炸力》,由我主演
766
00:54:03,861 --> 00:54:08,866
妳看後面會有財務數字
767
00:54:08,949 --> 00:54:12,077
我在亞洲滿受歡迎的
768
00:54:14,163 --> 00:54:15,831
至少是一部分的亞洲
769
00:54:15,915 --> 00:54:19,627
我們去過那部分亞洲,連餐廳都去不了
770
00:54:20,502 --> 00:54:26,217
有什麼是比投資金雞母更好的禮物呢?
771
00:54:28,510 --> 00:54:30,471
糟糕
772
00:54:31,222 --> 00:54:33,349
奶奶不喜歡
773
00:54:34,350 --> 00:54:36,101
母親,我準備的東西真的很特別
774
00:54:42,733 --> 00:54:45,236
是我出生那天的紀念照
775
00:54:45,903 --> 00:54:46,987
我記得
776
00:54:47,780 --> 00:54:48,781
我也在那裡
777
00:54:49,323 --> 00:54:50,824
她根本把這當屁
778
00:54:53,452 --> 00:54:55,037
再次揮棒落空
779
00:54:55,913 --> 00:54:58,249
真是太精彩了 -媽咪,另一個呢?
780
00:54:58,332 --> 00:54:59,875
我準備了很多好東西,我拿一個
781
00:54:59,959 --> 00:55:03,045
愛芙,坐下吧,妳已經送一個了
782
00:55:03,128 --> 00:55:04,505
輪到傑森了
783
00:55:07,550 --> 00:55:09,426
我好像忘在車上了
784
00:55:09,510 --> 00:55:11,554
沒有,我剛剛有看到你放東西在樹下
785
00:55:12,346 --> 00:55:15,558
不對,那是… -真的,我發誓
786
00:55:15,641 --> 00:55:17,101
你知道嗎?那是…
787
00:55:17,184 --> 00:55:18,644
你不…不…
788
00:55:18,727 --> 00:55:19,895
是這個吧?
789
00:55:21,105 --> 00:55:23,107
我拿了,就送啊
790
00:55:25,276 --> 00:55:26,318
謝謝
791
00:55:27,861 --> 00:55:29,572
是我最喜歡的威士忌
792
00:55:30,906 --> 00:55:32,241
卡片就不用看了
793
00:55:56,849 --> 00:55:57,850
謝謝你,傑森
794
00:56:04,440 --> 00:56:05,733
卡片上寫什麼?
795
00:56:06,275 --> 00:56:08,652
這是我跟傑森的祕密
796
00:56:09,194 --> 00:56:11,405
別人不必知道
797
00:56:11,488 --> 00:56:12,573
對吧,傑森?
798
00:56:15,409 --> 00:56:16,410
對
799
00:56:18,329 --> 00:56:20,206
你有爸爸媽媽嗎?
800
00:56:22,458 --> 00:56:24,627
當然,我有過爸爸媽媽
801
00:56:26,086 --> 00:56:27,588
我不是一出生就是聖誕老人的
802
00:56:28,672 --> 00:56:30,382
我以前也有人生
803
00:56:31,926 --> 00:56:34,178
很久很久以前
804
00:56:39,058 --> 00:56:40,517
他們叫我…
805
00:56:42,102 --> 00:56:43,103
尼康蒙德
806
00:56:47,691 --> 00:56:48,984
血紅的尼康蒙德
807
00:56:50,778 --> 00:56:52,655
你那時候有另一份工作嗎?
808
00:56:53,572 --> 00:56:54,865
對,可以這麼說
809
00:56:56,492 --> 00:57:00,371
我是戰士、掠奪者、小偷
810
00:57:01,372 --> 00:57:03,165
如果有人擋住我的路
811
00:57:04,625 --> 00:57:07,169
我跟爆頭錘會… -爆頭錘是誰?
812
00:57:08,462 --> 00:57:10,089
爆頭錘是我的…
813
00:57:11,507 --> 00:57:12,591
錘子
814
00:57:14,301 --> 00:57:15,761
我最愛用的錘子
815
00:57:16,470 --> 00:57:18,639
有它在手,我所向無敵
816
00:57:18,722 --> 00:57:21,100
可以一次打爆三顆頭,排成一排
817
00:57:22,851 --> 00:57:23,894
為什麼呢?
818
00:57:25,771 --> 00:57:26,772
什麼?
819
00:57:26,855 --> 00:57:29,233
為什麼你要那樣?
820
00:57:31,443 --> 00:57:32,778
因為我很壞
821
00:57:34,989 --> 00:57:36,073
而且很貪心
822
00:57:38,826 --> 00:57:41,078
我想要黃金、珠寶
823
00:57:42,329 --> 00:57:45,666
如果當時有壞孩子名單,
我一定是榜首
824
00:57:47,710 --> 00:57:49,128
但是也許…
825
00:57:50,796 --> 00:57:51,797
什麼?
826
00:57:51,881 --> 00:57:54,091
也許你從前做的壞事
827
00:57:55,467 --> 00:57:58,304
現在能拿來做好事
828
00:57:59,221 --> 00:58:00,472
能幫助人
829
00:58:02,016 --> 00:58:03,058
什麼意思?
830
00:58:03,642 --> 00:58:07,104
兔兔先生不只是玩具
831
00:58:08,272 --> 00:58:10,691
那天晚上你實現了我的願望
832
00:58:11,609 --> 00:58:13,152
讓我有最好的朋友
833
00:58:14,194 --> 00:58:16,780
因為你很善良又仁慈
834
00:58:17,364 --> 00:58:19,867
你的意義勝過你送的那些禮物
835
00:58:20,784 --> 00:58:22,661
所以我才相信你,聖誕老人
836
00:58:23,412 --> 00:58:24,955
這是我相信你的原因
837
00:58:31,378 --> 00:58:32,421
謝謝妳
838
00:58:34,590 --> 00:58:37,718
妳躲好,楚蒂,等我去接妳
839
00:58:39,178 --> 00:58:40,221
保護自己
840
00:58:41,805 --> 00:58:44,558
好,衛星已經確認了
841
00:58:44,642 --> 00:58:46,685
搶救小組已經在路上
842
00:58:46,769 --> 00:58:48,646
預計還有30分鐘抵達
843
00:58:49,230 --> 00:58:51,982
一切符合預期,沒有問題
844
00:58:52,775 --> 00:58:55,694
好了,大夥兒,打起精神
845
00:58:55,778 --> 00:58:56,904
你們都知道計畫
846
00:58:56,987 --> 00:59:00,491
我的行動要跟打砲一樣
847
00:59:00,574 --> 00:59:03,118
乾淨俐落,快速完事
848
00:59:03,661 --> 00:59:07,540
如果有白癡擋路,你們要怎麼做?
849
00:59:07,623 --> 00:59:09,625
讓那混蛋滿地找牙
850
00:59:09,708 --> 00:59:11,252
就是這樣
851
00:59:12,127 --> 00:59:13,420
準備大幹一場
852
00:59:16,257 --> 00:59:18,425
出發,你們這些小王八蛋
853
00:59:24,848 --> 00:59:26,433
該死的這家人
854
00:59:48,330 --> 00:59:49,999
聖誕快樂
855
00:59:50,082 --> 00:59:52,501
佳節愉快 -叛徒
856
00:59:54,962 --> 00:59:57,423
他在東側 -我們過去了,拖住他
857
01:00:12,313 --> 01:00:13,606
讓開
858
01:00:27,828 --> 01:00:32,041
這又喘又肥的糟老頭怎麼能痛宰我們?
859
01:00:32,833 --> 01:00:35,294
我不知道 -他連武器都沒有
860
01:00:35,878 --> 01:00:37,922
他身上就背著這個袋子而已
861
01:00:38,005 --> 01:00:39,131
裡面有什麼?
862
01:00:40,883 --> 01:00:42,134
啥都看不到
863
01:00:47,806 --> 01:00:48,891
東西給我
864
01:01:00,069 --> 01:01:04,114
怎麼會有白癡背著西洋棋走來走去?
865
01:01:08,369 --> 01:01:09,537
搞什麼鬼?
866
01:01:09,620 --> 01:01:11,997
莫名其妙,都是些破東西
867
01:01:19,421 --> 01:01:22,424
你要告訴我們這個袋子的機關嗎?
868
01:01:22,508 --> 01:01:23,801
那是魔法
869
01:01:23,884 --> 01:01:26,512
把手放進去,就能拿出禮物
870
01:01:28,514 --> 01:01:30,724
其實我也不太懂它的原理
871
01:01:32,560 --> 01:01:35,980
你就是小氣財神吧?
872
01:01:36,063 --> 01:01:39,233
對,那你又是誰?
873
01:01:39,858 --> 01:01:41,277
白鬍子老公公
874
01:01:42,820 --> 01:01:44,363
聖尼古拉斯
875
01:01:45,739 --> 01:01:47,491
聖誕老人
876
01:01:48,534 --> 01:01:51,787
耶誕老公公、聖誕老公公、紅衣主教
877
01:01:51,871 --> 01:01:54,123
歡樂的老聖尼古拉斯
878
01:01:54,206 --> 01:01:56,375
我有各種名字
879
01:01:58,002 --> 01:02:00,421
哈哈哈,很好笑
880
01:02:00,504 --> 01:02:02,965
還是我應該說“呵呵呵”?
881
01:02:03,507 --> 01:02:06,385
如果你是聖誕老人,你的馴鹿呢?
882
01:02:06,468 --> 01:02:08,429
牠們本來停在屋頂上
883
01:02:08,512 --> 01:02:11,265
都是被我做成冷凍肉串的那傢伙…
884
01:02:13,893 --> 01:02:16,604
你不相信我?去看啊
885
01:02:16,687 --> 01:02:19,189
歡欣可是留了一大坨在上面
886
01:02:19,273 --> 01:02:21,191
這老頭是瘋子
887
01:02:21,275 --> 01:02:23,569
你不覺得… -我知道妳是笨蛋
888
01:02:23,652 --> 01:02:25,779
但不必敲鑼打鼓告訴大家
889
01:02:25,863 --> 01:02:29,909
他只是穿著戲服,帶著魔術袋的傢伙
890
01:02:30,451 --> 01:02:34,663
不!那個袋子裝的都是孩子的夢想!
891
01:02:34,747 --> 01:02:37,833
夠了,大家都知道聖誕節願望都是屁
892
01:02:39,210 --> 01:02:43,047
我爸以前每個聖誕節都很認真
893
01:02:43,130 --> 01:02:45,382
每個他媽的聖誕節都準備了禮物
894
01:02:45,466 --> 01:02:47,593
還有糖果、裝飾那些的
895
01:02:47,676 --> 01:02:51,055
還唱聖誕歌,全都是狗屁
896
01:02:52,973 --> 01:02:54,391
後來我…
897
01:02:55,059 --> 01:02:59,230
大概10歲的時候吧,他被裁員了
898
01:02:59,313 --> 01:03:01,774
我們連聖誕樹都買不起了
899
01:03:01,857 --> 01:03:04,109
沒有聖誕大餐、沒有禮物,啥都沒有
900
01:03:04,193 --> 01:03:05,694
空空的,連個屁都沒有
901
01:03:06,695 --> 01:03:08,155
但是我們的鄰居
902
01:03:08,239 --> 01:03:09,949
鄰居什麼都有
903
01:03:10,491 --> 01:03:13,827
我從窗戶看他們開心過節,
像是嘲笑我
904
01:03:14,745 --> 01:03:16,914
等到平安夜那天
905
01:03:19,041 --> 01:03:20,876
我等所有人都上床睡覺後
906
01:03:21,627 --> 01:03:24,380
溜進他們家,打算全部偷走
907
01:03:26,465 --> 01:03:28,926
沒想到老爺爺起床尿尿
908
01:03:29,009 --> 01:03:31,804
我們倆都被對方嚇死了,結果…
909
01:03:33,264 --> 01:03:35,391
他從樓梯上跌下來,摔斷了脖子
910
01:03:35,474 --> 01:03:37,601
在醫院裡死掉了
911
01:03:38,936 --> 01:03:41,438
大家都以為是我幹的,
每次我要解釋…
912
01:03:41,522 --> 01:03:42,856
我一直想要解釋
913
01:03:45,734 --> 01:03:47,152
算了,可能真是我幹的吧
914
01:03:48,362 --> 01:03:51,156
說不定我真的推了他,可憐的臭老頭
915
01:03:51,699 --> 01:03:56,036
懂了嗎?聖誕節毀了我的人生
916
01:03:56,120 --> 01:04:00,291
但是也讓我走上這條路,
讓我這麼成功
917
01:04:00,374 --> 01:04:01,876
我很遺憾,吉米
918
01:04:03,294 --> 01:04:04,295
我是真心的
919
01:04:05,337 --> 01:04:09,592
但我送禮物,帶來歡笑,
卻不插手人生
920
01:04:09,675 --> 01:04:13,137
是嗎?說不定你該死的應該要!
921
01:04:19,310 --> 01:04:21,145
他怎麼知道你的名字?
922
01:04:21,770 --> 01:04:24,940
畢旺,你的理由又是什麼?
923
01:04:26,692 --> 01:04:29,695
1982那年不是給你想要的腳踏車了嗎?
924
01:04:29,778 --> 01:04:32,281
你寫了50次信說想要的那輛啊!
925
01:04:33,782 --> 01:04:35,242
妳呢,琪拉?
926
01:04:35,326 --> 01:04:37,620
妳還讓弟弟吃蟲
927
01:04:37,703 --> 01:04:39,246
真是不乖!
928
01:04:39,330 --> 01:04:41,415
他怎麼知道腳踏車的事?
929
01:04:41,498 --> 01:04:44,835
隨便猜的,像是說你喜歡大奶一樣
930
01:04:44,919 --> 01:04:46,921
拜託,哪個小孩不想要腳踏車
931
01:04:47,004 --> 01:04:49,757
告訴我你老闆是誰 -老天,不
932
01:04:49,840 --> 01:04:52,676
你有五秒鐘告訴我你的真實身分
933
01:04:52,760 --> 01:04:55,763
五、四、三、二
934
01:04:55,846 --> 01:04:57,640
我是聖誕老人!
935
01:04:57,723 --> 01:04:59,183
就要不是了
936
01:05:25,417 --> 01:05:26,877
下雪了嗎?
937
01:05:26,961 --> 01:05:29,755
是他施的聖誕魔法嗎?
938
01:05:37,137 --> 01:05:38,847
讓雪下吧
939
01:05:51,193 --> 01:05:52,653
不是雪
940
01:05:52,736 --> 01:05:56,198
只是雪花泡沫,我就說他是冒牌貨
941
01:06:10,754 --> 01:06:11,755
他去哪了?
942
01:06:13,591 --> 01:06:15,926
他溜進煙囪了,我看到了
943
01:06:16,010 --> 01:06:19,430
好像有什麼鑽頭或滑輪讓他往上飛了
944
01:06:19,513 --> 01:06:21,098
你進不去的,不可能
945
01:06:21,181 --> 01:06:23,767
看到一件怪事你就以為這是童話世界?
946
01:06:23,851 --> 01:06:26,020
來了,雪橇鈴聲響叮噹
947
01:06:26,103 --> 01:06:28,647
我的天,他的馴鹿來了
948
01:06:32,109 --> 01:06:35,404
是搶救小組,你給我振作一點
949
01:06:50,628 --> 01:06:54,048
那聲音,我的殺人特攻隊來了
950
01:06:56,300 --> 01:06:59,094
你們完了,等著瞧吧!
951
01:06:59,178 --> 01:07:01,472
你這個爛妖精還有什麼花樣?
952
01:07:02,640 --> 01:07:04,558
伯特 -#天祐伯特
953
01:07:08,437 --> 01:07:09,438
讚啦!
954
01:07:10,272 --> 01:07:11,482
跑酷
955
01:07:11,565 --> 01:07:12,650
殺了他,寶貝
956
01:07:16,111 --> 01:07:17,613
摩根會救我們的
957
01:07:19,573 --> 01:07:22,993
那個動作巨猩棄我們不顧了,親愛的
958
01:07:30,292 --> 01:07:31,710
先不要開火
959
01:07:32,253 --> 01:07:33,504
無敵風火輪!
960
01:07:35,464 --> 01:07:36,757
沒事沒事
961
01:07:37,466 --> 01:07:38,634
不要開槍
962
01:07:38,717 --> 01:07:40,010
表明你的身分
963
01:07:40,761 --> 01:07:42,429
我是人質之一
964
01:07:42,513 --> 01:07:44,056
摩根史帝
965
01:07:44,640 --> 01:07:45,683
我是演員
966
01:07:46,350 --> 01:07:48,644
演出過很多次士兵
967
01:07:48,727 --> 01:07:51,939
我想謝謝你們的付出,永遠忠誠
968
01:07:53,023 --> 01:07:54,858
裡面情況如何?
969
01:07:55,568 --> 01:07:57,403
好幾個退伍軍人
970
01:07:57,486 --> 01:07:59,613
但我警告你們,他們知道你們要來
971
01:07:59,697 --> 01:08:00,906
我覺得他們有備而來
972
01:08:00,990 --> 01:08:03,993
最好是,我們行程很趕
973
01:08:05,411 --> 01:08:06,662
該死
974
01:08:11,166 --> 01:08:12,167
真是…
975
01:08:12,251 --> 01:08:13,836
好了,我們開始動作
976
01:08:14,336 --> 01:08:15,337
動起來
977
01:08:17,715 --> 01:08:19,717
(壞孩子)
978
01:08:19,800 --> 01:08:20,800
拜託
979
01:08:21,885 --> 01:08:23,554
別開玩笑了
980
01:08:23,637 --> 01:08:26,514
索普,你遲到了,怎麼了?
981
01:08:26,599 --> 01:08:29,059
看來你的網子有破洞了
982
01:08:29,143 --> 01:08:31,604
還是你只是讓人質出來運動一下?
983
01:08:31,687 --> 01:08:33,772
不,裡面有人搗亂我們的計畫
984
01:08:33,856 --> 01:08:36,233
讓情況變得很棘手,問題一堆
985
01:08:36,317 --> 01:08:37,568
誰?萊史東家的保全嗎?
986
01:08:37,651 --> 01:08:39,987
我覺得不是,是一個穿
聖誕裝闖入的人
987
01:08:40,070 --> 01:08:42,531
我得說,那個人很古怪
988
01:08:42,615 --> 01:08:44,074
他可能真的是聖誕老人
989
01:08:45,576 --> 01:08:48,204
她說什麼鬼話? -沒事,她在開玩笑
990
01:08:49,287 --> 01:08:50,581
我的小隊會處理
991
01:08:53,125 --> 01:08:56,629
B組,去找出那個混蛋
992
01:08:58,171 --> 01:09:02,092
現在要來開禮物了,對吧?
993
01:09:02,635 --> 01:09:06,138
你們都聽到了,追殺聖誕老人
994
01:09:07,181 --> 01:09:09,016
我看到了,他在屋頂上
995
01:09:09,767 --> 01:09:11,477
收到,我看到了
996
01:09:29,202 --> 01:09:31,162
好,糖梅,按下按鍵
997
01:09:38,461 --> 01:09:39,921
搞定了
998
01:09:40,005 --> 01:09:41,423
我們的萬能鑰匙
999
01:09:41,507 --> 01:09:43,467
開門魔法棒
1000
01:09:43,550 --> 01:09:45,094
這東西最好有用
1001
01:09:45,177 --> 01:09:47,679
我已經賭上我的職業生涯和名聲了
1002
01:09:47,763 --> 01:09:50,224
你可以再買新的名聲
1003
01:09:59,984 --> 01:10:03,028
小時候我最喜歡拆聖誕禮物了
1004
01:10:03,112 --> 01:10:05,781
我媽都用包裝紙把空盒子包起來
1005
01:10:07,199 --> 01:10:08,951
裡面沒有東西我也不在乎
1006
01:10:21,797 --> 01:10:24,884
這是他媽的惡作劇嗎? -不
1007
01:10:26,844 --> 01:10:28,220
你說錢會在這裡面的!
1008
01:10:28,304 --> 01:10:29,680
我跟你說
1009
01:10:30,389 --> 01:10:33,851
我的情報很可靠,有內鬼接應我
1010
01:10:35,728 --> 01:10:40,983
昨天有三億元送到這他媽的豪宅啊
1011
01:10:46,488 --> 01:10:48,365
一定是被人攔截了
1012
01:10:53,162 --> 01:10:54,872
王八蛋
1013
01:11:17,811 --> 01:11:18,812
該死
1014
01:11:19,355 --> 01:11:21,482
聖誕老人,你還好嗎?
1015
01:11:22,149 --> 01:11:23,359
聖誕老人?
1016
01:11:23,442 --> 01:11:26,320
新來了一群人,都在壞孩子名單上
1017
01:11:27,321 --> 01:11:30,074
他們身上有很多厲害的玩意兒
1018
01:11:31,450 --> 01:11:33,536
抱歉了,孩子,我恐怕不行了
1019
01:11:33,619 --> 01:11:35,287
不,別這麼說
1020
01:11:35,371 --> 01:11:36,539
壞孩子名單
1021
01:11:38,082 --> 01:11:39,583
變得越來越長
1022
01:11:49,051 --> 01:11:52,263
他在那棟建築裡,開夜視攝影機
1023
01:11:52,346 --> 01:11:53,681
不要放棄
1024
01:11:54,390 --> 01:11:56,809
這次你來許願,聖誕老人
1025
01:11:56,892 --> 01:11:58,811
只有這一次
1026
01:11:58,894 --> 01:12:01,105
如果你能許一個願望
1027
01:12:02,106 --> 01:12:03,649
那會是什麼?
1028
01:12:09,863 --> 01:12:12,074
我希望能再看到聖誕奶奶一眼
1029
01:12:13,409 --> 01:12:15,119
告訴她我有多愛她
1030
01:12:16,287 --> 01:12:18,539
那麼你就要實現這個願望
1031
01:12:19,498 --> 01:12:20,541
該死
1032
01:12:21,166 --> 01:12:22,918
不,不,不
1033
01:12:24,879 --> 01:12:26,088
我的天
1034
01:12:27,882 --> 01:12:28,924
不
1035
01:12:41,478 --> 01:12:44,398
你說這些人是壞小孩
1036
01:12:44,481 --> 01:12:46,692
你要怎麼對付壞小孩?
1037
01:12:47,484 --> 01:12:49,153
我會拿出大塊的煤炭
1038
01:12:49,236 --> 01:12:51,280
對,用煤炭給他們好看
1039
01:12:52,823 --> 01:12:55,367
把煤炭直接塞到他們的…
1040
01:12:55,451 --> 01:12:57,203
肛門 -對!
1041
01:13:03,209 --> 01:13:04,710
他們就在外面
1042
01:13:19,225 --> 01:13:21,143
聖誕老人要來打爆這些傢伙了
1043
01:13:21,977 --> 01:13:23,479
就像捏碎一盤餅乾那樣
1044
01:13:29,109 --> 01:13:30,110
動作快
1045
01:13:33,489 --> 01:13:34,657
嘿,鎖門
1046
01:13:37,076 --> 01:13:38,244
燈關掉
1047
01:13:40,079 --> 01:13:41,288
躲在我後面
1048
01:14:03,394 --> 01:14:05,354
好,我的錢他媽的在哪裡?
1049
01:14:05,437 --> 01:14:07,606
錢在哪裡?
1050
01:14:18,701 --> 01:14:21,453
夠了,我目前為止都對你們很好
1051
01:14:21,537 --> 01:14:24,665
但現在結束了,不玩什麼鬼遊戲了!
1052
01:14:25,165 --> 01:14:29,044
錢在哪裡?不說我就一個個斃了你們
1053
01:14:33,465 --> 01:14:34,967
在金庫裡
1054
01:14:35,050 --> 01:14:37,261
我剛剛去看過,要是裡面有錢
1055
01:14:37,344 --> 01:14:39,138
我現在就不會是這個臉了
1056
01:14:39,221 --> 01:14:40,598
不可能
1057
01:14:40,681 --> 01:14:42,725
要闖進去要好幾天
1058
01:14:42,808 --> 01:14:46,478
但我們有鑰匙,萊史東夫人
1059
01:14:47,688 --> 01:14:48,689
索普
1060
01:14:51,191 --> 01:14:53,611
這年頭誰都信不過了
1061
01:14:54,153 --> 01:14:58,782
不管是妳還是妳哪個蠢孩子把錢弄走了
1062
01:14:58,866 --> 01:15:00,492
我都很不爽
1063
01:15:00,576 --> 01:15:06,332
不爽到我想要隨便殺個人發洩
1064
01:15:07,374 --> 01:15:08,584
等一下,不好意思
1065
01:15:09,960 --> 01:15:11,086
什麼?什麼?
1066
01:15:11,170 --> 01:15:13,756
如果你殺死了知道錢在哪的人怎麼辦?
1067
01:15:16,508 --> 01:15:18,177
你們這些該死的傢伙
1068
01:15:22,973 --> 01:15:28,020
我們等待了整整一年
1069
01:15:29,647 --> 01:15:33,984
期盼這一天到來
1070
01:15:35,861 --> 01:15:40,532
大家開開心心齊聚一堂
1071
01:15:41,617 --> 01:15:43,285
和樂融融
1072
01:15:45,579 --> 01:15:49,542
歡樂時刻總會來臨
1073
01:15:51,168 --> 01:15:52,920
人人都能和平共處
1074
01:15:53,003 --> 01:15:54,046
看我的
1075
01:15:57,841 --> 01:16:02,388
也能活得長長久久
1076
01:16:03,931 --> 01:16:07,101
每個人都自由自在
1077
01:16:07,184 --> 01:16:10,437
你我都能發光發熱
1078
01:16:10,521 --> 01:16:13,482
聖誕佳節最開心
1079
01:16:13,566 --> 01:16:16,694
聖誕佳節最溫馨
1080
01:16:16,777 --> 01:16:19,488
希望天天都是聖誕節
1081
01:16:19,572 --> 01:16:21,115
給我點回應吧
1082
01:16:22,199 --> 01:16:23,492
到底是怎麼回事?
1083
01:16:23,576 --> 01:16:24,577
(失去訊號)
1084
01:16:24,660 --> 01:16:25,703
小孩眼中充滿歡樂
1085
01:16:25,786 --> 01:16:28,330
老人臉上露出微笑
1086
01:16:28,414 --> 01:16:32,751
永遠都能歡度聖誕節
1087
01:16:34,628 --> 01:16:38,591
我們今晚都是一家人
1088
01:16:40,092 --> 01:16:44,763
不管你的膚色是黑或是白
1089
01:16:47,057 --> 01:16:51,687
因為我們都能齊聲歡唱
1090
01:16:52,229 --> 01:16:54,189
和樂融融
1091
01:16:56,358 --> 01:17:00,404
一切都還來得及
1092
01:17:01,822 --> 01:17:03,407
這世界可以變成
1093
01:17:03,991 --> 01:17:06,869
一個更好的地方
1094
01:17:08,871 --> 01:17:13,250
只要維持祥和氣氛
1095
01:17:14,668 --> 01:17:17,546
不只在聖誕節這天
1096
01:17:17,630 --> 01:17:21,550
都能散佈和平訊息
1097
01:17:22,676 --> 01:17:26,013
聖誕佳節最開心
1098
01:17:26,096 --> 01:17:28,682
聖誕佳節最溫馨
1099
01:17:28,766 --> 01:17:33,562
希望天天都是聖誕節
1100
01:17:35,064 --> 01:17:38,651
小孩眼中充滿歡樂
1101
01:17:38,734 --> 01:17:41,487
老人臉上露出微笑
1102
01:17:41,570 --> 01:17:45,741
永遠都能歡度聖誕節
1103
01:17:47,451 --> 01:17:49,036
今晚是平安夜
1104
01:17:49,995 --> 01:17:51,372
我的老天爺啊
1105
01:17:52,957 --> 01:17:55,876
不,我是聖誕老公公
1106
01:17:55,960 --> 01:17:58,254
今天是聖誕節
1107
01:17:59,880 --> 01:18:02,508
摯愛的親朋好友齊聚一堂
1108
01:18:03,092 --> 01:18:07,388
到處都充滿溫馨祥和氛圍
1109
01:18:08,389 --> 01:18:10,057
天哪! -給你吧
1110
01:18:10,599 --> 01:18:12,184
放在襪子裡的禮物
1111
01:18:13,644 --> 01:18:15,563
在哪裡?媽的
1112
01:18:15,646 --> 01:18:17,147
靠,靠
1113
01:18:17,231 --> 01:18:19,233
靠…
1114
01:18:19,316 --> 01:18:21,193
這我非看不可 -靠!
1115
01:18:23,737 --> 01:18:26,323
我的媽媽咪啊
1116
01:18:28,033 --> 01:18:32,580
葛楚不可能把這種事告訴外人
1117
01:18:32,663 --> 01:18:33,664
所以
1118
01:18:34,498 --> 01:18:37,042
姻親不可能知道
1119
01:18:38,127 --> 01:18:41,046
所以我可以斃了她
1120
01:18:41,964 --> 01:18:44,091
除非你們告訴我該死的錢在哪裡
1121
01:18:44,174 --> 01:18:47,136
不要,拜託,是聖誕節欸 -閉嘴!
1122
01:18:49,138 --> 01:18:52,391
你們要是不說,我保證她的頭會爆開
1123
01:18:52,474 --> 01:18:53,559
是我!
1124
01:18:54,727 --> 01:18:56,645
什麼? -對,是我幹的
1125
01:18:56,729 --> 01:18:58,814
我把錢移走了 -你別傻了
1126
01:18:58,898 --> 01:19:00,691
那錢是我們唯一的籌碼! -什麼?
1127
01:19:00,774 --> 01:19:02,526
有槍指著我老婆的頭啊!
1128
01:19:02,610 --> 01:19:04,486
對,你怎麼知道我們會來?
1129
01:19:04,570 --> 01:19:06,322
我不知道,我只是把錢偷走了
1130
01:19:06,405 --> 01:19:08,490
對!只是巧合 -我的天哪
1131
01:19:08,574 --> 01:19:10,242
我打算把錢帶走
1132
01:19:10,326 --> 01:19:12,369
今晚就帶著妻女落跑
1133
01:19:12,453 --> 01:19:13,787
永遠不再回來
1134
01:19:14,955 --> 01:19:19,001
然後我媽會在隔天一早
1135
01:19:19,084 --> 01:19:21,837
邊喝威士忌邊看卡片,發現真相
1136
01:19:21,921 --> 01:19:24,089
多年來我一直告訴你
1137
01:19:24,173 --> 01:19:26,759
不要管你媽那些該死的錢了!
1138
01:19:26,842 --> 01:19:29,762
結果你的解決方法卻是偷走一大筆錢
1139
01:19:30,846 --> 01:19:34,391
對,妳這麼一講聽起來是很蠢
1140
01:19:34,475 --> 01:19:37,019
你現在怎麼能這樣?真是噁心
1141
01:19:37,102 --> 01:19:38,812
媽媽都給了我們那麼多啊
1142
01:19:38,896 --> 01:19:40,648
拜託,愛芙,她給我們一切
1143
01:19:40,731 --> 01:19:43,234
都是為了確保我們知道她有權全數收回
1144
01:19:43,901 --> 01:19:47,029
這麼多年來我對妳卑躬屈膝
1145
01:19:47,112 --> 01:19:52,034
同時卻摧毀了我生命中
唯一美好的事物
1146
01:19:52,660 --> 01:19:56,080
現在是怎樣?家族治療還是搶劫?
1147
01:19:56,163 --> 01:19:58,624
談心時間結束了
1148
01:19:58,707 --> 01:20:00,876
好了,錢在哪裡?
1149
01:20:07,341 --> 01:20:08,717
瞧瞧這個小傻瓜
1150
01:20:14,265 --> 01:20:16,308
糟糕 -怎麼了?
1151
01:20:16,392 --> 01:20:17,810
壞人找到我了
1152
01:20:17,893 --> 01:20:19,228
好
1153
01:20:19,311 --> 01:20:20,479
我來了
1154
01:20:27,611 --> 01:20:30,948
告訴妳,看得到的陷阱是沒用的
1155
01:20:33,826 --> 01:20:35,119
妳這個小笨蛋
1156
01:20:39,415 --> 01:20:40,583
老天,靠北!
1157
01:20:44,753 --> 01:20:47,089
救救我!
1158
01:20:48,173 --> 01:20:50,301
你…你會沒事的
1159
01:20:51,260 --> 01:20:53,012
坐好,我等等就回來
1160
01:20:55,514 --> 01:20:57,600
讓我先殺了這個小混蛋
1161
01:21:01,437 --> 01:21:03,397
妳這個該死的小混蛋
1162
01:21:52,363 --> 01:21:54,698
妳死定了!媽的妳死定了!
1163
01:22:02,706 --> 01:22:04,375
該死的爛東西
1164
01:22:10,756 --> 01:22:11,757
妳這個…
1165
01:22:30,943 --> 01:22:32,194
看我的!
1166
01:22:52,006 --> 01:22:53,632
該死的混…
1167
01:23:03,017 --> 01:23:04,018
靠
1168
01:23:05,311 --> 01:23:06,687
抓到妳了,小鬼
1169
01:23:06,770 --> 01:23:08,230
是嗎?注意頭上
1170
01:23:10,691 --> 01:23:12,192
妳就這麼點能耐?
1171
01:23:15,237 --> 01:23:16,614
我受夠了
1172
01:23:43,098 --> 01:23:44,141
聖誕老人!
1173
01:23:54,401 --> 01:23:56,570
嗨,楚蒂
1174
01:23:56,654 --> 01:23:59,990
我學電影做陷阱,好好玩
1175
01:24:08,249 --> 01:24:09,667
楚蒂,我要妳…
1176
01:24:10,501 --> 01:24:11,669
幫我一個忙
1177
01:24:12,753 --> 01:24:15,798
轉過去,眼睛閉起來
1178
01:24:15,881 --> 01:24:20,719
把手指塞進耳朵,大聲唱聖誕快樂歌
1179
01:24:22,096 --> 01:24:25,724
叮叮噹,叮叮噹,鈴聲多響亮
1180
01:24:26,225 --> 01:24:28,102
你看他不懼風霜…
1181
01:24:28,185 --> 01:24:31,105
妳差點殺掉一個無辜的孩子
1182
01:24:32,273 --> 01:24:34,692
無辜? -妳很壞
1183
01:24:35,776 --> 01:24:38,028
壞小孩 -面容多麼慈祥
1184
01:24:38,112 --> 01:24:39,572
壞小孩!
1185
01:24:39,655 --> 01:24:42,992
這是萊史東家的遺傳,我們很壞
1186
01:24:43,075 --> 01:24:44,869
所以我懂你為什麼會這麼做
1187
01:24:44,952 --> 01:24:47,413
你外公告訴我,公司永遠不會交給我
1188
01:24:47,496 --> 01:24:49,665
因為女生沒有能力
1189
01:24:49,748 --> 01:24:51,834
我只好把公司從他手裡搶過來
1190
01:24:51,917 --> 01:24:54,962
重點是,萊史東家的人會為自己爭取
1191
01:24:55,045 --> 01:24:56,088
我以你為傲,兒子
1192
01:24:56,171 --> 01:24:58,048
好了,東西到底在哪裡?
1193
01:24:59,967 --> 01:25:01,552
錢就藏在裡面
1194
01:25:03,721 --> 01:25:07,558
三智者給祂禮物,分別是乳香
1195
01:25:08,434 --> 01:25:09,602
沒藥
1196
01:25:11,395 --> 01:25:14,148
還有冷冰冰的現鈔
1197
01:25:14,231 --> 01:25:15,733
裝起來吧,兄弟
1198
01:25:15,816 --> 01:25:17,860
好了,我們拿到錢了
1199
01:25:18,527 --> 01:25:20,946
殺掉人質,我們外面會合
1200
01:25:21,030 --> 01:25:22,865
什麼?不行
1201
01:25:26,285 --> 01:25:29,705
媽 -沒事,伯特,沒事的
1202
01:25:29,788 --> 01:25:30,998
好了
1203
01:25:32,166 --> 01:25:33,542
都給我站起來
1204
01:25:34,376 --> 01:25:38,797
殺人時間到
1205
01:25:38,881 --> 01:25:42,343
拜託,你們不想殺我們的,真的
1206
01:25:43,260 --> 01:25:44,553
我想殺
1207
01:25:45,095 --> 01:25:47,640
我真的真的很想殺
1208
01:25:47,723 --> 01:25:49,308
我要從妳開始
1209
01:25:49,391 --> 01:25:51,310
不… -等一下
1210
01:25:54,271 --> 01:25:57,316
你應該先殺舅媽 -搞屁啊,伯特?
1211
01:25:57,399 --> 01:26:00,819
你連在死前都不放過當混蛋嗎?
1212
01:26:00,903 --> 01:26:02,363
我建議你先殺他 -什麼?
1213
01:26:02,446 --> 01:26:05,574
等一下,不!不要先殺他
1214
01:26:05,658 --> 01:26:09,119
不准叫他混蛋,妳這個拜金女
1215
01:26:09,203 --> 01:26:11,997
好,我改變心意,先殺這個酒鬼女人
1216
01:26:12,081 --> 01:26:14,708
不准叫我媽酒鬼女人 -你媽就是酒鬼
1217
01:26:14,792 --> 01:26:16,544
妳是拜金女 -我是拜金女?
1218
01:26:16,627 --> 01:26:18,587
那我幹嘛工作? -妳到底來幹嘛?
1219
01:26:18,671 --> 01:26:20,130
妳根本不是這個家的一份子
1220
01:26:20,214 --> 01:26:22,174
她是工程師! -妳倒是很懂嘛…
1221
01:26:22,258 --> 01:26:23,551
閉嘴!
1222
01:26:23,634 --> 01:26:24,843
我根本不知道
1223
01:26:27,763 --> 01:26:30,641
真是狗咬狗一嘴毛
1224
01:26:32,351 --> 01:26:34,603
你們不能有點尊嚴地死去嗎?
1225
01:26:39,692 --> 01:26:40,985
放開我!
1226
01:26:41,610 --> 01:26:42,611
好了好了
1227
01:26:43,279 --> 01:26:44,530
去你的!
1228
01:26:45,072 --> 01:26:47,825
居然吼我兒子 -怪胎!
1229
01:26:47,908 --> 01:26:49,702
居然搧我巴掌,王八蛋
1230
01:26:49,785 --> 01:26:52,079
然後你的帽子醜得要命!
1231
01:27:01,630 --> 01:27:02,715
他…
1232
01:27:03,465 --> 01:27:04,758
是不是死了?
1233
01:27:09,305 --> 01:27:10,556
對
1234
01:27:12,057 --> 01:27:13,058
謝了,琳達
1235
01:27:13,767 --> 01:27:16,353
一家人同心協力是挺好的改變
1236
01:27:18,731 --> 01:27:20,232
該死! -我要…
1237
01:27:25,487 --> 01:27:26,864
這是幫摩根報仇
1238
01:27:27,531 --> 01:27:31,619
他可能很蠢,但身材真的很讚
1239
01:27:34,580 --> 01:27:36,498
楚蒂! -媽咪!
1240
01:27:38,167 --> 01:27:39,376
感謝老天,寶貝
1241
01:27:40,961 --> 01:27:43,130
妳沒事吧? -我沒事,媽咪
1242
01:27:43,214 --> 01:27:44,215
好
1243
01:27:44,298 --> 01:27:46,759
這是我朋友,聖誕老人
1244
01:27:51,472 --> 01:27:53,307
搞什麼鬼?
1245
01:27:53,390 --> 01:27:55,017
謝謝…
1246
01:27:55,100 --> 01:27:58,145
尼可拉斯,
叫我聖誕老人就好
1247
01:27:59,897 --> 01:28:02,149
你們應該趕快離開,這裡很危險
1248
01:28:02,691 --> 01:28:04,735
他們帶走了我丈夫和她祖母
1249
01:28:06,278 --> 01:28:09,156
有人會用這東西嗎? -我應該會
1250
01:28:09,240 --> 01:28:10,908
我以前會跟爸爸去打獵
1251
01:28:12,660 --> 01:28:13,702
收到
1252
01:28:13,786 --> 01:28:15,454
情況如何? -一切順利
1253
01:28:15,538 --> 01:28:16,830
保持警覺,兄弟
1254
01:28:18,415 --> 01:28:19,416
我來了!
1255
01:28:19,500 --> 01:28:20,501
小心了!
1256
01:28:22,419 --> 01:28:23,837
誰開槍了?是誰…
1257
01:28:25,256 --> 01:28:26,423
隊長,趴下!
1258
01:28:33,055 --> 01:28:34,932
格殺勿論,火力全開
1259
01:28:52,074 --> 01:28:53,325
夠了,我們他媽的快閃
1260
01:28:53,409 --> 01:28:54,785
走吧 -去哪裡?
1261
01:28:54,869 --> 01:28:57,121
動作快點,老屁股 -走吧
1262
01:28:57,204 --> 01:28:58,831
不要用你的髒手碰我
1263
01:29:09,884 --> 01:29:11,427
該死
1264
01:29:11,510 --> 01:29:14,638
我的蛋蛋!我的蛋蛋!
1265
01:29:15,389 --> 01:29:16,390
好
1266
01:29:31,864 --> 01:29:35,451
我的蛋,你幹嘛要射我的…
1267
01:29:38,078 --> 01:29:39,455
噢,耶穌
1268
01:29:41,081 --> 01:29:42,082
對不起
1269
01:29:44,210 --> 01:29:46,712
別擔心我們,尼可拉斯,交給我們吧
1270
01:29:47,713 --> 01:29:51,091
那是誰? -他說自己是尼可拉斯
1271
01:29:53,677 --> 01:29:56,805
糟糕,楚蒂 -她在房子裡,沒事
1272
01:29:56,889 --> 01:29:58,224
她很安全
1273
01:29:58,849 --> 01:30:00,768
感謝神 -對啊
1274
01:30:22,081 --> 01:30:23,415
不,不要
1275
01:30:23,499 --> 01:30:25,376
靠! -不…等等
1276
01:31:10,671 --> 01:31:13,382
該死!
1277
01:31:15,968 --> 01:31:17,428
呵呵!
1278
01:31:18,470 --> 01:31:19,471
呵呵!
1279
01:31:20,306 --> 01:31:21,307
靠!
1280
01:32:06,018 --> 01:32:07,436
去死吧
1281
01:33:00,948 --> 01:33:02,741
來啊,你來啊
1282
01:33:02,825 --> 01:33:04,827
對,在這邊,在這邊!
1283
01:33:05,995 --> 01:33:06,996
聖誕老人!
1284
01:33:08,247 --> 01:33:09,290
來吧!
1285
01:33:10,583 --> 01:33:11,584
就是這樣
1286
01:33:55,336 --> 01:33:56,337
靠
1287
01:34:05,846 --> 01:34:07,431
(壞小孩 吉米馬丁尼茲)
1288
01:34:13,562 --> 01:34:15,689
{\an8}(殺了最好的朋友、傷了媽媽的心)
1289
01:34:15,773 --> 01:34:17,524
{\an8}(小偷、殺人犯、痛恨聖誕節)
1290
01:34:20,361 --> 01:34:21,403
你是真的?
1291
01:34:23,656 --> 01:34:25,991
你就是他
1292
01:34:29,286 --> 01:34:30,496
你就是你
1293
01:34:30,579 --> 01:34:33,499
我講了很多次了
1294
01:34:33,582 --> 01:34:36,460
該死的真聖誕老人
1295
01:34:37,127 --> 01:34:39,004
你今晚運氣不好,老弟
1296
01:34:39,630 --> 01:34:41,465
是嗎?我覺得你錯了
1297
01:34:42,174 --> 01:34:44,969
我覺得我的悲慘一生都是為了這一刻
1298
01:34:45,511 --> 01:34:50,516
因為只要殺了你,這該死的節日就沒了
1299
01:34:51,475 --> 01:34:52,977
我會不計代價
1300
01:34:55,771 --> 01:34:57,606
聖誕節就在今晚終結
1301
01:36:25,861 --> 01:36:26,904
來吧!
1302
01:36:26,987 --> 01:36:28,280
來吧,我們結束一切吧!
1303
01:37:16,829 --> 01:37:19,582
最後一個聖誕節
1304
01:37:29,592 --> 01:37:31,302
只要你相信,就不會結束
1305
01:37:33,596 --> 01:37:35,139
不!
1306
01:38:03,876 --> 01:38:07,087
我搞不懂現在到底是怎樣
1307
01:38:10,257 --> 01:38:11,592
但一切要結束了
1308
01:38:17,056 --> 01:38:18,515
你說得沒錯
1309
01:38:28,025 --> 01:38:29,652
楚蒂,小心
1310
01:38:33,697 --> 01:38:34,698
聖誕老人
1311
01:38:35,991 --> 01:38:37,785
糟糕,聖誕老人
1312
01:38:39,411 --> 01:38:40,829
糟了
1313
01:38:48,379 --> 01:38:49,797
你救了我女兒
1314
01:38:50,965 --> 01:38:52,216
不
1315
01:38:53,300 --> 01:38:54,718
是她救了我
1316
01:38:55,344 --> 01:38:57,721
快救他,救救他
1317
01:38:57,805 --> 01:39:00,057
親愛的,我們恐怕無能為力
1318
01:39:00,140 --> 01:39:01,308
沒關係,沒關係
1319
01:39:01,934 --> 01:39:04,353
太晚了,來不及了
1320
01:39:06,689 --> 01:39:07,690
好冷
1321
01:39:09,900 --> 01:39:11,527
我好多年不覺得冷了
1322
01:39:12,278 --> 01:39:13,612
要讓他保暖
1323
01:39:15,030 --> 01:39:18,242
火快滅了,我們要找東西來燒
1324
01:39:21,078 --> 01:39:22,371
我有個想法
1325
01:39:29,211 --> 01:39:32,172
不,不行,傑森,不行
1326
01:39:32,715 --> 01:39:36,051
拜託,聖誕老人,你不要死
1327
01:39:39,889 --> 01:39:42,641
傑森,先等一下,你要幹嘛?
1328
01:39:43,475 --> 01:39:45,978
我已經比凡人活得久很多了
1329
01:39:46,061 --> 01:39:47,605
他就只剩一口氣了
1330
01:39:47,688 --> 01:39:50,190
你們在想什麼?不需要燒錢吧
1331
01:39:50,274 --> 01:39:51,275
好,再多一點,對
1332
01:39:51,358 --> 01:39:54,028
你不能死,聖誕老人,你要醒來
1333
01:39:54,111 --> 01:39:56,405
我的聖誕魔法大概用完了
1334
01:39:58,157 --> 01:39:59,158
對不起
1335
01:40:01,577 --> 01:40:02,578
我很…
1336
01:40:02,661 --> 01:40:05,080
我很抱歉不能實現妳的願望
1337
01:40:07,166 --> 01:40:08,334
這拿去,拿去
1338
01:40:08,417 --> 01:40:09,668
但你已經實現了
1339
01:40:13,714 --> 01:40:16,759
聖誕老人,不要死,醒醒
1340
01:40:17,301 --> 01:40:18,302
醒醒啊
1341
01:40:18,385 --> 01:40:20,221
我們要讓他靠近火堆
1342
01:40:20,763 --> 01:40:21,764
傑森
1343
01:40:24,141 --> 01:40:25,184
醒醒啊
1344
01:40:26,602 --> 01:40:27,645
拜託
1345
01:40:27,728 --> 01:40:28,729
不
1346
01:40:34,652 --> 01:40:36,570
我真的覺得很遺憾
1347
01:40:42,201 --> 01:40:43,494
這個人…
1348
01:40:46,038 --> 01:40:49,416
這個勇敢無畏的人…不管他是誰
1349
01:40:49,500 --> 01:40:53,128
他是聖誕老人,真的聖誕老人,真的
1350
01:40:53,796 --> 01:40:56,006
而且我還是相信他
1351
01:40:57,049 --> 01:40:59,134
我永遠都相信你,聖誕老人
1352
01:41:04,765 --> 01:41:06,058
我也相信他
1353
01:41:09,311 --> 01:41:10,479
他救了楚蒂
1354
01:41:12,314 --> 01:41:13,774
他救了我們全家
1355
01:41:16,485 --> 01:41:18,153
有什麼比這更真實的?
1356
01:41:23,033 --> 01:41:24,243
那麼也許…
1357
01:41:27,329 --> 01:41:28,831
我也相信他
1358
01:41:29,915 --> 01:41:31,292
我也是
1359
01:41:34,128 --> 01:41:36,171
該死,我應該…
1360
01:41:38,007 --> 01:41:39,967
我應該也相信吧
1361
01:41:40,050 --> 01:41:41,927
媽的
1362
01:41:42,011 --> 01:41:43,512
我也相信
1363
01:41:54,607 --> 01:41:56,692
天哪 -聖誕老人!
1364
01:42:02,406 --> 01:42:03,407
你…
1365
01:42:05,201 --> 01:42:06,869
你不是死了嗎?
1366
01:42:07,828 --> 01:42:09,330
這是聖誕魔法
1367
01:42:10,664 --> 01:42:14,835
我還是搞不清楚原理是什麼
1368
01:42:21,467 --> 01:42:22,760
謝謝你
1369
01:42:22,843 --> 01:42:24,803
我不知道該怎麼報答你
1370
01:42:25,387 --> 01:42:28,224
你們讓我死而復生,所以扯平了
1371
01:42:29,516 --> 01:42:32,937
扯平了?我們燒光了50萬現金欸
1372
01:42:34,396 --> 01:42:36,774
聖誕老人,你看看是誰來了?
1373
01:42:44,573 --> 01:42:47,451
現在你們倒是出現了
1374
01:42:48,577 --> 01:42:51,622
把我丟下來等死,等我搞定了才回來
1375
01:42:51,705 --> 01:42:56,085
聽著,我要把你們煮成燉肉給精靈吃
1376
01:42:58,462 --> 01:43:03,634
對,就是在說你,閃電!
1377
01:43:03,717 --> 01:43:05,427
還有你,歡欣
1378
01:43:11,016 --> 01:43:13,686
你們拿了我的袋子,備用的
1379
01:43:13,769 --> 01:43:16,397
你們回家拿了我的備用袋子?
1380
01:43:19,108 --> 01:43:21,860
唉唷,真是沒辦法生你們的氣了
1381
01:43:24,363 --> 01:43:26,865
沒辦法
1382
01:43:36,542 --> 01:43:39,962
(你應該也會需要這個 聖誕奶奶)
1383
01:43:45,134 --> 01:43:47,928
嘿,美女 -是爆頭錘!
1384
01:44:01,233 --> 01:44:04,069
看來該說再見了,我得走了
1385
01:44:05,321 --> 01:44:06,488
你一定要走嗎?
1386
01:44:10,743 --> 01:44:11,994
今天是平安夜啊
1387
01:44:12,077 --> 01:44:14,580
名單上還有很多乖小孩
1388
01:44:14,705 --> 01:44:16,874
他們都在等我去發禮物
1389
01:44:19,335 --> 01:44:20,586
謝謝妳
1390
01:44:21,670 --> 01:44:22,671
為什麼?
1391
01:44:23,505 --> 01:44:25,132
謝謝妳相信我
1392
01:44:25,216 --> 01:44:28,010
提醒我聖誕節還是很重要的
1393
01:44:29,970 --> 01:44:33,265
我也還有存在的意義
1394
01:44:36,393 --> 01:44:38,229
妳讓我重新找回“呵呵呵”
1395
01:44:48,364 --> 01:44:50,157
好了,該閃了
1396
01:44:54,411 --> 01:44:57,373
聖誕快樂!
1397
01:45:00,876 --> 01:45:06,757
猛衝、舞者、歡欣、雌狐,快跑!
1398
01:45:06,840 --> 01:45:13,013
慧星、邱比特、暴雷、閃電,衝啊!
1399
01:45:13,097 --> 01:45:16,767
走吧,你們這些美麗的小混蛋!
1400
01:45:16,850 --> 01:45:19,770
我們還得去幹活兒呢!
1401
01:45:23,065 --> 01:45:25,234
呵呵呵!
1402
01:45:25,734 --> 01:45:29,196
聖誕快樂!
1403
01:46:57,368 --> 01:47:02,706
嘿唷,伯特駕到!
有好料的給伯粉
1404
01:47:02,790 --> 01:47:05,167
看到這傢伙了嗎?他死到底了
1405
01:47:05,251 --> 01:47:08,379
聖誕老人是真的,小心別進壞孩子名單
1406
01:47:08,462 --> 01:47:10,714
要乖,伯特萊史東,先閃
1407
01:47:12,049 --> 01:47:14,051
翻譯:甯安