1
00:00:32,741 --> 00:00:33,992
Thank you.

2
00:00:34,701 --> 00:00:35,827
Wooh!

3
00:00:42,167 --> 00:00:43,853
Ladies and gentlemen,
that is Thomas Middleditch.

4
00:00:43,877 --> 00:00:46,838
- That's Benjamin Schwartz.
- We are Middleditch and Schwartz.

5
00:00:46,921 --> 00:00:47,921
It's true.

6
00:00:49,007 --> 00:00:50,467
- It's true.
- Wow!

7
00:00:50,550 --> 00:00:52,135
- Wow!
- Wow!

8
00:00:52,218 --> 00:00:53,261
Here we are.

9
00:00:53,595 --> 00:00:55,555
Everything tonight will be
made up on the spot.

10
00:00:55,638 --> 00:00:57,640
Every character, every word,
every sentence,

11
00:00:57,724 --> 00:00:58,808
everything in the universe.

12
00:00:58,892 --> 00:00:59,934
This is long form improv,

13
00:01:00,018 --> 00:01:02,353
and we're very excited to bring it
in a special form.

14
00:01:02,437 --> 00:01:03,772
What we're going to do right now,

15
00:01:03,855 --> 00:01:05,541
Thomas is going to
ask the audience a question.

16
00:01:05,565 --> 00:01:08,193
Please answer it in a real way,
and we'll have a conversation.

17
00:01:08,276 --> 00:01:09,569
We might ask a question or two.

18
00:01:09,652 --> 00:01:11,505
Thomas, do you have a question
for the audience?

19
00:01:11,529 --> 00:01:12,781
Yeah, I do, I do, I do.

20
00:01:12,864 --> 00:01:14,199
A prompt, if you will.

21
00:01:14,824 --> 00:01:18,453
Uh... is there anything coming up
in the near future

22
00:01:18,536 --> 00:01:21,081
that you might either be excited about

23
00:01:21,164 --> 00:01:23,249
or dreading in some kind of way?

24
00:01:23,374 --> 00:01:24,626
Getting married.

25
00:01:24,751 --> 00:01:26,920
Getting married?

26
00:01:27,837 --> 00:01:30,090
Are you getting married
to a man or woman?

27
00:01:30,215 --> 00:01:31,716
So, they're getting married...

28
00:01:31,800 --> 00:01:32,840
I'm in the wedding.

29
00:01:32,884 --> 00:01:34,070
You're in the wedding, but you...

30
00:01:34,094 --> 00:01:35,237
- talked about them?
- That's interesting

31
00:01:35,261 --> 00:01:37,889
- from the perspective of that.
- That is interesting.

32
00:01:38,348 --> 00:01:39,974
And they're right next to you?

33
00:01:40,517 --> 00:01:44,145
So, you are in the wedding party for this.

34
00:01:44,229 --> 00:01:46,231
Can you talk a little bit
about the wedding itself?

35
00:01:46,314 --> 00:01:47,941
They recently got engaged.

36
00:01:48,024 --> 00:01:49,043
Congratulations.

37
00:01:49,067 --> 00:01:50,985
They got the venue nailed down...

38
00:01:51,611 --> 00:01:53,780
It's insane to me
that you're explaining...

39
00:01:54,864 --> 00:01:56,449
No, it's, it's... great.

40
00:01:57,492 --> 00:01:59,953
- This is how weddings should be explained.
- Yeah.

41
00:02:01,079 --> 00:02:02,122
Really build it out.

42
00:02:02,205 --> 00:02:03,748
Really tell us everybody involved.

43
00:02:03,832 --> 00:02:04,999
For real. Alright, go.

44
00:02:05,125 --> 00:02:06,501
So, they got engaged.

45
00:02:06,584 --> 00:02:08,419
Um, we all met each other,

46
00:02:08,503 --> 00:02:10,147
like the group of friends
that are in the wedding

47
00:02:10,171 --> 00:02:11,756
all met each other at music festivals.

48
00:02:11,840 --> 00:02:12,924
- Oh!
- That's sweet.

49
00:02:13,049 --> 00:02:15,051
How long ago was that?

50
00:02:15,135 --> 00:02:17,428
How long has this pod of pals
been going on?

51
00:02:17,512 --> 00:02:18,513
2015.

52
00:02:18,596 --> 00:02:19,514
2015.

53
00:02:19,597 --> 00:02:21,057
So, barely, barely.

54
00:02:23,143 --> 00:02:24,060
Still...

55
00:02:24,144 --> 00:02:26,980
That's a great year, though.
It's a good year for making friends.

56
00:02:27,063 --> 00:02:29,440
I have so many questions
for the wedding couple.

57
00:02:29,524 --> 00:02:32,026
Like, "What up with friends
you grew up with?"

58
00:02:33,361 --> 00:02:35,488
No, you fucking went to Burning Man once,

59
00:02:35,572 --> 00:02:37,073
and you're like, "These guys"?

60
00:02:37,991 --> 00:02:38,992
Alright.

61
00:02:39,325 --> 00:02:41,953
Only friends we
met in a Walmart parking lot.

62
00:02:42,120 --> 00:02:44,581
All your friends you
met in a Walmart parking lot?

63
00:02:44,956 --> 00:02:48,001
Can you give us...
Tell us who's in that batch of friends

64
00:02:48,084 --> 00:02:50,336
that you met in a Walmart parking lot.

65
00:02:50,879 --> 00:02:52,505
It's a hodgepodge of friends,

66
00:02:52,589 --> 00:02:54,465
from my friends from home,

67
00:02:54,591 --> 00:02:56,551
my fiance's friends from college...

68
00:02:57,051 --> 00:02:59,179
He is a friend of a friend, who...

69
00:03:01,514 --> 00:03:03,266
Do you not have friends of friends?

70
00:03:04,267 --> 00:03:05,894
Ha, ha, ha, ha!

71
00:03:06,269 --> 00:03:07,269
Ridiculous.

72
00:03:07,395 --> 00:03:08,771
Someone who knows someone?

73
00:03:09,522 --> 00:03:10,522
Insane.

74
00:03:10,690 --> 00:03:13,610
But a friend of a friend
to get bumped to the wedding party

75
00:03:13,693 --> 00:03:14,569
is a pretty big deal.

76
00:03:14,652 --> 00:03:16,738
- You've got to be a good dude.
- That's a fast bond.

77
00:03:16,821 --> 00:03:17,821
I get that, though.

78
00:03:17,864 --> 00:03:19,824
When I fall for a friend, I fall hard.

79
00:03:21,576 --> 00:03:22,577
We were traveling...

80
00:03:22,660 --> 00:03:24,454
Yeah, it's time you take over. Go.

81
00:03:25,955 --> 00:03:27,707
- I think it is.
- I do too.

82
00:03:27,790 --> 00:03:30,376
- I want it from this guy,
- I want to hear it too.

83
00:03:30,460 --> 00:03:32,003
So, basically, they tried to ditch us,

84
00:03:32,086 --> 00:03:33,880
and the only reason we found them

85
00:03:33,963 --> 00:03:37,050
was because I happened to pull in
to a supermarket parking lot...

86
00:03:37,133 --> 00:03:39,414
When they were trying to ditch you,
you caught up to them.

87
00:03:39,469 --> 00:03:42,096
Yeah, so then there was
an awkward moment real quick.

88
00:03:42,180 --> 00:03:44,020
- And now I'm in the wedding.
- That's amazing.

89
00:03:44,098 --> 00:03:47,101
Give us descriptions
of who these people are. Like...

90
00:03:47,185 --> 00:03:51,189
Another one is my, uh, college roommate's
best friend from high school.

91
00:03:54,234 --> 00:03:58,488
I like that as like an identifier
of who that person is...

92
00:03:59,697 --> 00:04:01,282
on like a core level.

93
00:04:02,951 --> 00:04:04,035
Yes, but who are you?

94
00:04:04,118 --> 00:04:05,804
- I'm my college roommate's...
- Who is that person?

95
00:04:05,828 --> 00:04:07,389
- ...friend from high school.
- Give us something.

96
00:04:07,413 --> 00:04:08,915
His name is Matt.

97
00:04:08,998 --> 00:04:10,959
Um, he was my boyfriend in sixth grade.

98
00:04:11,042 --> 00:04:12,168
What is happening?

99
00:04:13,795 --> 00:04:15,129
So, you went out with him.

100
00:04:15,255 --> 00:04:17,757
- Not no more, girl.
- In sixth grade, what was he like?

101
00:04:17,840 --> 00:04:19,717
He was very short.

102
00:04:21,928 --> 00:04:23,388
We all are in sixth grade.

103
00:04:24,806 --> 00:04:26,391
We're all pretty tiny then.

104
00:04:26,474 --> 00:04:27,850
Yeah, don't judge, man.

105
00:04:27,934 --> 00:04:29,602
You were fucking short then, too.

106
00:04:32,522 --> 00:04:33,606
Uh...

107
00:04:33,898 --> 00:04:37,610
So, when you're
in the wedding party, sir,

108
00:04:37,694 --> 00:04:40,488
I want to ask you, are you the best man?

109
00:04:40,697 --> 00:04:43,116
- I don't know that we know.
- No.

110
00:04:46,536 --> 00:04:48,288
Did you just find that out now?

111
00:04:49,747 --> 00:04:51,249
- Yeah.
- Yes...

112
00:04:51,332 --> 00:04:52,709
I just found that out.

113
00:04:52,834 --> 00:04:54,210
Number seven of seven.

114
00:04:54,585 --> 00:04:55,837
Okay, number seven of seven.

115
00:04:55,920 --> 00:04:57,547
- You've ranked them.
- Yeah.

116
00:04:58,298 --> 00:04:59,298
Who's this?

117
00:04:59,382 --> 00:05:01,384
You're... you're with someone, maybe?

118
00:05:01,467 --> 00:05:02,302
Right there?

119
00:05:02,385 --> 00:05:03,386
- Her?
- Yeah.

120
00:05:04,971 --> 00:05:07,598
No, no, that fucking thing right there.

121
00:05:09,350 --> 00:05:12,312
- Whatever that is.
- Tell us about that post in front of you.

122
00:05:12,437 --> 00:05:14,689
- Whatever that...
- Who is this wonderful woman?

123
00:05:14,772 --> 00:05:16,166
She wasn't there. This is my girlfriend.

124
00:05:16,190 --> 00:05:17,984
- Okay.
- Is she invited?

125
00:05:18,067 --> 00:05:20,153
She was invited,
but she didn't want to go.

126
00:05:25,325 --> 00:05:28,077
- This is going to be...
- I told you that in confidence.

127
00:05:28,953 --> 00:05:32,498
This is going to be on Netflix
where everybody can watch it.

128
00:05:32,582 --> 00:05:35,168
I know it feels like
a normal one of our shows

129
00:05:35,251 --> 00:05:37,962
where everybody tells
their deepest, darkest secrets.

130
00:05:38,421 --> 00:05:40,089
She's invited to the wedding.

131
00:05:40,173 --> 00:05:41,758
She wasn't invited to the festival.

132
00:05:41,841 --> 00:05:42,967
- Oh!
- Ah!

133
00:05:43,051 --> 00:05:44,761
That's what we were asking. Okay.

134
00:05:45,094 --> 00:05:46,697
Anybody else in the group
you'll talk about?

135
00:05:46,721 --> 00:05:48,306
We have a friend who's a nurse.

136
00:05:48,431 --> 00:05:50,016
- Nurse?
- Who's married to...

137
00:05:50,350 --> 00:05:51,434
the short guy.

138
00:05:51,517 --> 00:05:52,517
Yes.

139
00:05:53,561 --> 00:05:55,080
- I cannot tell you...
- Wait, so your...

140
00:05:55,104 --> 00:05:58,399
sixth grade shorty ass,
fucking, ex-boyfriend

141
00:05:58,483 --> 00:05:59,859
is still around in your life?

142
00:05:59,942 --> 00:06:02,320
- He's in the wedding party.
- Yeah, he's my best friend.

143
00:06:02,403 --> 00:06:03,905
You guys are the best.

144
00:06:05,531 --> 00:06:06,991
What does Short Stuff do?

145
00:06:07,700 --> 00:06:09,827
Uh... he listens to live music.

146
00:06:09,911 --> 00:06:10,912
We don't really know.

147
00:06:10,995 --> 00:06:12,538
You all listen to live music.

148
00:06:13,623 --> 00:06:15,208
You guys love music.

149
00:06:15,291 --> 00:06:17,603
Anything else you want to ask,
or do we do an improv show now?

150
00:06:17,627 --> 00:06:19,355
- Let's do an improv show.
- Okay, ladies and gentlemen,

151
00:06:19,379 --> 00:06:22,256
thank you very much.
We appreciate all four of you guys.

152
00:06:24,842 --> 00:06:25,885
Um...

153
00:06:26,010 --> 00:06:29,847
So, for the rest of the show,
nobody else has to talk.

154
00:06:30,098 --> 00:06:32,809
Thank you all so much for being here.

155
00:06:32,892 --> 00:06:34,119
We really, really appreciate it.

156
00:06:34,143 --> 00:06:37,313
Without further ado, we present to you
Middleditch and Schwartz.

157
00:06:47,448 --> 00:06:48,448
Hey, Danny.

158
00:06:49,659 --> 00:06:50,701
- Dan?
- Yeah.

159
00:06:51,035 --> 00:06:52,245
- Yeah.
- Just checking in.

160
00:06:52,328 --> 00:06:54,622
- Do you need anything? Do you think?
- Huh?

161
00:06:54,705 --> 00:06:56,016
- Do you need anything?
- I'm good for now.

162
00:06:56,040 --> 00:06:57,184
- Just making the rounds.
- I'm good for now.

163
00:06:57,208 --> 00:06:58,519
- You good? You look great.
- Yeah, thanks.

164
00:06:58,543 --> 00:06:59,770
- This is awesome.
- Thanks, man. I appreciate it.

165
00:06:59,794 --> 00:07:00,878
What a cool tux, man.

166
00:07:00,962 --> 00:07:01,962
Oh, yeah, thanks.

167
00:07:02,046 --> 00:07:02,880
- Yeah.
- Wow!

168
00:07:02,964 --> 00:07:04,400
- Twin tail. Shit!
- Yeah.

169
00:07:04,424 --> 00:07:05,842
- That's awesome.
- I'm nervous.

170
00:07:05,925 --> 00:07:07,236
- Of course you are, yeah.
- I'm nervous.

171
00:07:07,260 --> 00:07:08,529
I mean, I'd never do what you do.

172
00:07:08,553 --> 00:07:09,429
- But, yeah.
- What?

173
00:07:09,512 --> 00:07:10,948
I'd never do what you're doing. Sorry.

174
00:07:10,972 --> 00:07:11,972
Get married?

175
00:07:12,014 --> 00:07:14,684
I wouldn't. But that's so cool, man.
That's awesome.

176
00:07:14,767 --> 00:07:15,643
Yeah, yeah, yeah.

177
00:07:15,726 --> 00:07:17,145
I made the right choice.

178
00:07:17,228 --> 00:07:18,308
- Of course you did.
- Cool.

179
00:07:18,354 --> 00:07:19,355
I mean for you.

180
00:07:19,439 --> 00:07:20,481
Yeah, thanks.

181
00:07:20,565 --> 00:07:22,358
Is everybody good? Is everybody here?

182
00:07:22,442 --> 00:07:24,777
I think so, yeah.
I'm just checking in with you.

183
00:07:24,861 --> 00:07:26,422
- You know?
- They say you get nervous.

184
00:07:26,446 --> 00:07:28,197
You get a little nervous right before.

185
00:07:28,281 --> 00:07:30,300
- So, this is normal, what I'm feeling.
- Of course.

186
00:07:30,324 --> 00:07:32,344
- You're going to change your life.
- Yeah, for the better.

187
00:07:32,368 --> 00:07:34,412
Yeah. For me it would be worse.

188
00:07:34,495 --> 00:07:35,495
But I know myself.

189
00:07:35,913 --> 00:07:36,956
I know myself.

190
00:07:37,039 --> 00:07:38,082
- Yeah.
- Yeah, but yeah.

191
00:07:38,166 --> 00:07:39,834
You're gonna do great.

192
00:07:39,917 --> 00:07:41,461
She's great, you know.

193
00:07:41,544 --> 00:07:42,462
Yeah, she is great.

194
00:07:42,545 --> 00:07:44,255
- She's fun.
- She's fun, yeah.

195
00:07:44,380 --> 00:07:46,549
Yeah. Give me another attribute about her.

196
00:07:48,259 --> 00:07:52,138
Uh... I met her fou... five years ago.

197
00:07:52,221 --> 00:07:53,981
- Thanks. That's helpful.
- Four years ago...

198
00:07:54,015 --> 00:07:55,016
Thank you.

199
00:07:55,850 --> 00:07:56,934
Okay. Yeah.

200
00:07:57,101 --> 00:07:59,997
- It's just weird. You know what I mean?
- You know what's weird, actually?

201
00:08:00,021 --> 00:08:01,021
Uh...

202
00:08:01,898 --> 00:08:04,650
I just found out...
I probably shouldn't tell you this.

203
00:08:04,734 --> 00:08:05,776
No, go, go, go. Come on.

204
00:08:05,860 --> 00:08:08,321
- Is it going to fuck me up a little or no?
- Uh...

205
00:08:08,404 --> 00:08:10,448
Is it going to fuck me up a little, or no?

206
00:08:10,531 --> 00:08:12,575
Be honest.
Right now I feel pretty nervous.

207
00:08:12,658 --> 00:08:14,327
Is it going to fuck me up, or no?

208
00:08:14,952 --> 00:08:16,287
I don't... I don't know.

209
00:08:17,038 --> 00:08:18,664
I shou... I'm not going to tell you.

210
00:08:19,332 --> 00:08:20,666
- Okay.
- Alright, good talk.

211
00:08:22,543 --> 00:08:23,543
I trust you.

212
00:08:23,878 --> 00:08:25,296
- I trust you.
- Hey. Um...

213
00:08:25,796 --> 00:08:27,757
Um... I actually am going to tell you.

214
00:08:29,425 --> 00:08:30,468
Okay, go, yeah.

215
00:08:30,551 --> 00:08:33,846
So, I just found out that...

216
00:08:34,680 --> 00:08:37,183
Ka, Ka, Ka, Kathleen... Uh...

217
00:08:37,725 --> 00:08:39,352
She dated...

218
00:08:39,977 --> 00:08:40,978
Short Paul.

219
00:08:43,648 --> 00:08:45,149
My fiancée dated Short Paul?

220
00:08:45,233 --> 00:08:48,110
- And it was pretty serious.
- Wait, stop. Just so I get it in my head.

221
00:08:48,194 --> 00:08:49,654
The guy who listens to music?

222
00:08:51,531 --> 00:08:52,698
- Yes?
- Yes.

223
00:08:53,449 --> 00:08:54,492
Short Paul?

224
00:08:54,575 --> 00:08:55,660
I mean, it was years ago.

225
00:08:55,743 --> 00:08:57,745
You're not talking about
the singer Sean Paul?

226
00:08:57,828 --> 00:08:59,413
You're talking about Short Paul?

227
00:08:59,497 --> 00:09:01,040
Yeah, Short Paul our friend.

228
00:09:01,457 --> 00:09:03,876
- Uh...
- Because Sean Paul is here too, somewhere.

229
00:09:04,252 --> 00:09:05,294
That's great.

230
00:09:05,711 --> 00:09:07,630
Did not know that, but that's awesome.

231
00:09:07,922 --> 00:09:09,441
That's insane.
She never said it to me once.

232
00:09:09,465 --> 00:09:11,385
She's known that kid
since they were little kids.

233
00:09:11,467 --> 00:09:12,385
It was a long time ago.

234
00:09:12,468 --> 00:09:13,946
That's just what I heard.
It was ages ago.

235
00:09:13,970 --> 00:09:16,305
But, apparently it was pretty serious.

236
00:09:16,389 --> 00:09:18,015
But... you know...

237
00:09:19,058 --> 00:09:20,410
- Hey man, listen...
- Who cares, right?

238
00:09:20,434 --> 00:09:22,412
Everybody's dated a lot of
things before they get...

239
00:09:22,436 --> 00:09:23,437
Can you do me a favor?

240
00:09:23,521 --> 00:09:24,761
- Can you do me a favor?
- Yeah.

241
00:09:24,814 --> 00:09:26,375
You're my best man.
I need you to do me a favor.

242
00:09:26,399 --> 00:09:27,584
- Look me in the eyes.
- I'm your best man?

243
00:09:27,608 --> 00:09:29,193
Yes. Listen... for the wedding.

244
00:09:30,194 --> 00:09:32,405
No, I was gonna... That's fine.

245
00:09:32,697 --> 00:09:33,906
That's fine... Okay.

246
00:09:34,740 --> 00:09:36,617
You're my best man. Okay?

247
00:09:37,702 --> 00:09:38,911
What about your brother?

248
00:09:40,413 --> 00:09:42,290
I don't trust him. Okay?

249
00:09:42,873 --> 00:09:44,166
When you meet him, you'll know.

250
00:09:44,250 --> 00:09:46,377
I don't trust my fucking brother. Okay?

251
00:09:47,169 --> 00:09:50,256
Sebastian is like... He's so... It...

252
00:09:50,339 --> 00:09:52,049
He's always trying to impress people.

253
00:09:52,133 --> 00:09:53,718
Who cares? You know what I mean?

254
00:09:53,801 --> 00:09:55,641
But he can front flip
from the top of the house

255
00:09:55,678 --> 00:09:56,887
- into the pool.
- Exactly.

256
00:09:57,597 --> 00:09:59,682
But you, I mean you're
number seven out of seven.

257
00:09:59,765 --> 00:10:01,100
You just got fucking ranked up.

258
00:10:01,183 --> 00:10:02,286
- You know what I mean?
- I know.

259
00:10:02,310 --> 00:10:03,894
What are my responsibilities?

260
00:10:03,978 --> 00:10:05,038
- Listen...
- What do I do differently?

261
00:10:05,062 --> 00:10:06,331
Nothing, it's already the wedding.

262
00:10:06,355 --> 00:10:07,833
- It's already happening. Okay?
- Okay.

263
00:10:07,857 --> 00:10:09,376
I should have told you way before this.

264
00:10:09,400 --> 00:10:10,318
Way before.

265
00:10:10,401 --> 00:10:11,777
I'm going to be honest with you.

266
00:10:11,861 --> 00:10:13,487
It's because everybody else dropped out.

267
00:10:13,571 --> 00:10:14,571
- Okay?
- Oh, my God.

268
00:10:14,614 --> 00:10:16,717
They didn't want to be best men.
They wanted to get hammered.

269
00:10:16,741 --> 00:10:18,492
They didn't want to think of a speech.

270
00:10:18,576 --> 00:10:20,202
- Think of a speech.
- Oh...

271
00:10:20,286 --> 00:10:21,996
- Okay? Okay.
- Okay. Okay.

272
00:10:22,079 --> 00:10:23,873
- Sure.
- Okay, but can you do me a favor?

273
00:10:23,956 --> 00:10:27,001
Just go to Short Paul and make sure
he's not gonna do that weird thing

274
00:10:27,084 --> 00:10:28,854
where you snap out
in the middle of the reception.

275
00:10:28,878 --> 00:10:30,838
and you're like, "I say something mean."

276
00:10:30,921 --> 00:10:32,673
- You know what I mean?
- Yeah.

277
00:10:32,757 --> 00:10:33,924
"I object."

278
00:10:34,008 --> 00:10:36,135
The part of the wedding
where the minister says,

279
00:10:36,218 --> 00:10:37,970
"Does anybody want to say something mean?"

280
00:10:38,054 --> 00:10:39,054
- Yeah.
- Yeah.

281
00:10:39,305 --> 00:10:41,849
The part of the wedding
where the minister says...

282
00:10:41,932 --> 00:10:43,934
- I just want to make sure...
- I'm gonna...

283
00:10:44,018 --> 00:10:46,413
I'm going to ask him if he's
planning on saying anything mean.

284
00:10:46,437 --> 00:10:48,230
- Okay.
- So I need a lot of time.

285
00:10:48,314 --> 00:10:49,565
- Yeah, sure.
- Okay.

286
00:10:49,940 --> 00:10:51,651
I mean, that's cool. I'll do that.

287
00:10:51,776 --> 00:10:53,944
Of course. I'm your best man now, so...

288
00:10:54,028 --> 00:10:55,028
- Sure.
- Hey.

289
00:10:55,404 --> 00:10:58,658
Listen, I know we've only
known each other for three years.

290
00:10:58,783 --> 00:10:59,783
Yeah?

291
00:10:59,825 --> 00:11:01,077
- Three years.
- Yeah?

292
00:11:01,202 --> 00:11:03,055
And I know at the beginning
you were barely going to come.

293
00:11:03,079 --> 00:11:05,289
You were the last person
on our invite list.

294
00:11:06,374 --> 00:11:08,167
Like, I even told... I told Kathleen.

295
00:11:08,250 --> 00:11:09,490
I was like, "I don't think so."

296
00:11:09,543 --> 00:11:10,543
She was like, "Trust me.

297
00:11:10,586 --> 00:11:12,380
Just in case everybody else
fucks you over,

298
00:11:12,463 --> 00:11:14,674
you'll want a real dingbat
to come in there."

299
00:11:14,757 --> 00:11:15,591
Okay?

300
00:11:15,675 --> 00:11:16,884
Did she call me a dingbat?

301
00:11:16,967 --> 00:11:18,153
Yeah, she called you a dingbat.

302
00:11:18,177 --> 00:11:19,470
Just listen to me. Okay?

303
00:11:20,638 --> 00:11:21,782
- All right.
- You can do this.

304
00:11:21,806 --> 00:11:22,640
You can do this.

305
00:11:22,723 --> 00:11:23,909
Yeah, I know. I want to do this.

306
00:11:23,933 --> 00:11:26,435
There's a reason why we
cosmically met at that place.

307
00:11:26,519 --> 00:11:28,288
- You know what I mean?
- Yeah, at the parking lot.

308
00:11:28,312 --> 00:11:29,397
You were born for this.

309
00:11:29,480 --> 00:11:32,066
- Okay. I'm ready. I'm in it.
- You were born for this.

310
00:11:32,149 --> 00:11:34,276
What's up, motherfuckers!

311
00:11:34,360 --> 00:11:36,112
Sebastian in the house!

312
00:11:37,363 --> 00:11:38,489
Ah...

313
00:11:38,739 --> 00:11:40,074
Card trick. Anyway.

314
00:11:44,286 --> 00:11:45,913
- Hey, bro.
- Yo. What's up, bro?

315
00:11:46,080 --> 00:11:47,415
- Hey,
- Yo, what's up, bro?

316
00:11:47,498 --> 00:11:49,738
Hey man, go do the thing.
I've got to talk to my brother.

317
00:11:49,792 --> 00:11:51,377
Hey, he could stay if he wants.

318
00:11:51,460 --> 00:11:54,046
Uh... no! Uh... I've got some stuff to do.

319
00:11:58,342 --> 00:11:59,342
Hey!

320
00:11:59,427 --> 00:12:02,680
Dude, so I just figured you haven't
talked to me about it yet,

321
00:12:02,763 --> 00:12:04,724
but probably I should get to
my best man speech,

322
00:12:04,807 --> 00:12:07,017
- or something like that.
- Yeah. Um...

323
00:12:07,518 --> 00:12:09,103
About that... Um...

324
00:12:09,186 --> 00:12:12,440
Let me tell you how it goes,
and you could just give me notes.

325
00:12:12,523 --> 00:12:14,442
- Okay?
- Sure. Yeah. Uh...

326
00:12:14,650 --> 00:12:16,861
- Go ahead.
- I was born in 1981.

327
00:12:17,862 --> 00:12:19,864
Fuck, was my cock huge.

328
00:12:20,448 --> 00:12:22,283
When I came out the doctor was like,

329
00:12:22,366 --> 00:12:24,577
"Whoa, is that another baby?"

330
00:12:24,827 --> 00:12:26,328
Sebastian, baby.

331
00:12:27,538 --> 00:12:29,457
Anyway, I had a pretty good life.

332
00:12:29,790 --> 00:12:33,586
Uh... I think about it a lot lately,
and you know...

333
00:12:33,669 --> 00:12:36,046
You know, one time I jumped
off Mount Everest

334
00:12:36,130 --> 00:12:37,131
and landed on my feet.

335
00:12:37,673 --> 00:12:38,673
Anyway...

336
00:12:39,341 --> 00:12:42,178
two people are getting married,
Boopity-bop, bippity-bam.

337
00:12:42,261 --> 00:12:43,179
Sebastian in the house.

338
00:12:43,262 --> 00:12:44,638
I drop the mic into champagne.

339
00:12:44,722 --> 00:12:47,183
I pick it up.
I drink the champagne out of the mic...

340
00:12:47,266 --> 00:12:48,100
Out of the mic?

341
00:12:48,184 --> 00:12:50,344
Throw the mic into the audience.
Shit, is that a yo-yo?

342
00:12:50,394 --> 00:12:51,479
Back to my hand.

343
00:12:52,730 --> 00:12:54,482
I go... Ooooh!

344
00:12:54,648 --> 00:12:57,109
I do five minutes of really cool stand-up.

345
00:12:57,651 --> 00:12:59,570
I sing three of the most popular songs

346
00:12:59,653 --> 00:13:01,822
you've ever heard of
in your goddamn life.

347
00:13:01,906 --> 00:13:03,824
- Okay? And then I put the mic...
- I told you,

348
00:13:03,908 --> 00:13:06,619
- no copyrighted songs at the wedding.
- It's fine. It's fine.

349
00:13:06,702 --> 00:13:08,496
Is that cool?
If so, I'm going to head out.

350
00:13:08,579 --> 00:13:10,122
No, Sebastian, it's not cool.

351
00:13:10,206 --> 00:13:12,124
I mean, you could say all that stuff,

352
00:13:12,208 --> 00:13:13,918
but, you know, on your own time.

353
00:13:17,588 --> 00:13:20,007
- What do you mean on my own time?
- Uh...

354
00:13:20,090 --> 00:13:21,443
I'm your brother, man?
What's going on?

355
00:13:21,467 --> 00:13:22,694
- I know, you're my brother.
- Talk to me.

356
00:13:22,718 --> 00:13:24,220
Okay, alright. Um...

357
00:13:24,678 --> 00:13:26,138
I love you, you're my brother,

358
00:13:26,222 --> 00:13:28,891
but instead of having you
as my best man,

359
00:13:28,974 --> 00:13:31,852
I'm going to kick you down
to number seven out of seven.

360
00:13:34,021 --> 00:13:35,397
Okay, I'll say a joke now.

361
00:13:35,481 --> 00:13:37,483
Um... Um...

362
00:13:37,566 --> 00:13:39,568
You are... You are 100 feet tall.

363
00:13:39,652 --> 00:13:42,029
- Are we just making funny jokes?
- No.

364
00:13:42,613 --> 00:13:44,657
That's great. That's a funny joke.

365
00:13:45,783 --> 00:13:47,785
But Um...

366
00:13:47,868 --> 00:13:48,869
Very, very funny.

367
00:13:48,953 --> 00:13:50,454
Oh, fuck. Nobody even laughed.

368
00:13:50,538 --> 00:13:53,874
But... yeah. No, we're not making jokes.

369
00:13:53,958 --> 00:13:55,251
Because... uh...

370
00:13:55,417 --> 00:13:56,794
I just need... uh...

371
00:13:57,837 --> 00:13:58,879
Uh...

372
00:14:01,841 --> 00:14:03,175
- I forgot too.
- Corey.

373
00:14:03,342 --> 00:14:05,052
I don't think he has a name yet.

374
00:14:05,135 --> 00:14:06,303
- Corey.
- Corey.

375
00:14:06,387 --> 00:14:08,931
I just need Corey to step up
to be best man. You know?

376
00:14:09,014 --> 00:14:11,934
He and I have gotten real close
over the past three years.

377
00:14:12,726 --> 00:14:14,436
- And... uh...
- It's cool. It's cool.

378
00:14:14,520 --> 00:14:15,855
- It's just...
- It's cool.

379
00:14:15,980 --> 00:14:17,398
You don't trust me.

380
00:14:17,690 --> 00:14:18,816
Well, come on.

381
00:14:18,899 --> 00:14:21,193
You're going to drink champagne
out of the microphone?

382
00:14:22,152 --> 00:14:25,614
People will go fucking crazy for it, man.
You don't trust me. You never trusted me.

383
00:14:25,698 --> 00:14:29,660
But that makes the whole speech about you.
It's my day. It's my wedding day.

384
00:14:30,786 --> 00:14:34,039
You know, it's cool. I don't want
to fuck you up on your wedding day.

385
00:14:34,123 --> 00:14:35,583
Alright? I'll just... uh...

386
00:14:35,666 --> 00:14:38,586
Do I get to sit at the table
with you guys at the dais, or no?

387
00:14:38,669 --> 00:14:40,170
Well, you...

388
00:14:40,754 --> 00:14:43,215
you want to sit at the table
with me my new...

389
00:14:43,299 --> 00:14:44,466
- Kathleen.
- ...and Kathleen?

390
00:14:44,550 --> 00:14:45,384
Yeah.

391
00:14:45,467 --> 00:14:47,737
That kind of thing is just like
me and her, though, you know?

392
00:14:47,761 --> 00:14:50,514
Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'll go fucking
wait in the parking lot.

393
00:14:54,727 --> 00:14:55,769
Alright, it's cool.

394
00:14:59,648 --> 00:15:00,648
I don't have to...

395
00:15:02,985 --> 00:15:05,404
I've got a bow tie and a tie.

396
00:15:06,655 --> 00:15:09,241
If I was your best man,
I'd tell you you look stupid,

397
00:15:09,325 --> 00:15:10,325
but I'm not.

398
00:15:10,784 --> 00:15:12,286
This is how they're doing it.

399
00:15:16,540 --> 00:15:17,625
Hey, you know what?

400
00:15:17,958 --> 00:15:19,460
Even if I'm not your best man,

401
00:15:19,543 --> 00:15:20,943
I can fuckin'...I can help you out.

402
00:15:21,003 --> 00:15:22,630
Thanks. Thanks, Sebastian.

403
00:15:25,382 --> 00:15:27,468
- I'm proud of you.
- I'm proud of you too.

404
00:15:27,593 --> 00:15:28,593
I mean...

405
00:15:29,428 --> 00:15:31,597
You're two months sober, man.
That's crazy.

406
00:15:33,349 --> 00:15:34,183
Oh...

407
00:15:34,266 --> 00:15:35,935
Sorry, dark detail. Dark detail.

408
00:15:36,518 --> 00:15:39,772
It's even darker that I was going
to drink champagne at the toast.

409
00:15:43,233 --> 00:15:44,233
Alright.

410
00:15:45,653 --> 00:15:46,653
Yeah.

411
00:15:46,737 --> 00:15:47,655
Sorry about that.

412
00:15:47,738 --> 00:15:49,823
You know what? I'll just
see you out there. Alright?

413
00:15:49,907 --> 00:15:52,107
I don't know if you can see me.
I won't be at the table.

414
00:16:25,609 --> 00:16:26,485
Hey.

415
00:16:26,568 --> 00:16:28,654
- Hey, what's going on?
- Oh, no!

416
00:16:31,323 --> 00:16:32,700
Sean Paul or Short Paul?

417
00:16:32,783 --> 00:16:33,993
- Short Paul.
- Short Paul.

418
00:16:34,118 --> 00:16:36,078
Yeah, I know what Sean Paul sounds like.

419
00:16:36,161 --> 00:16:37,204
Short Paul, look.

420
00:16:37,287 --> 00:16:38,287
Hey.

421
00:16:38,539 --> 00:16:39,623
Hey, how are you?

422
00:16:40,416 --> 00:16:41,542
I'm good. How are you?

423
00:16:41,625 --> 00:16:42,960
I'm Maid of Honor. I'm good.

424
00:16:43,043 --> 00:16:43,961
- Yeah?
- Yeah.

425
00:16:44,044 --> 00:16:45,462
- Okay.
- Good to see you.

426
00:16:45,838 --> 00:16:47,506
Yeah, good to see you too. Uh...

427
00:16:48,298 --> 00:16:50,718
Good to see you too... Marnie.

428
00:16:50,801 --> 00:16:52,261
Marnie, yeah, yeah, yeah.

429
00:16:52,344 --> 00:16:53,387
My name is Marnie.

430
00:16:53,470 --> 00:16:55,305
- Your name is Marnie.
- I'm gonna do this.

431
00:16:55,389 --> 00:16:56,265
Yeah.

432
00:16:56,348 --> 00:16:57,348
Anyway...

433
00:16:57,641 --> 00:16:59,560
- You doing pants to this thing?
- Yeah.

434
00:17:01,645 --> 00:17:02,771
Because I feel like...

435
00:17:03,647 --> 00:17:06,608
I shouldn't have to wear... a dress.

436
00:17:06,692 --> 00:17:07,692
And Kathleen is so cool.

437
00:17:07,735 --> 00:17:09,319
She's like, "Wear whatever you want."

438
00:17:09,403 --> 00:17:11,321
- It's a wear-whatever-you-want thing.
- Yeah.

439
00:17:11,405 --> 00:17:12,906
Did you come by yourself?

440
00:17:13,157 --> 00:17:14,825
That's so crazy of me.

441
00:17:14,908 --> 00:17:17,453
- Did you come by yourself? Or...
- Uh...

442
00:17:17,828 --> 00:17:19,455
No, I didn't come by myself.

443
00:17:19,538 --> 00:17:21,290
I got my... uh...

444
00:17:21,623 --> 00:17:23,292
I'm with...

445
00:17:23,792 --> 00:17:25,377
I'm with Lisa, you know, but...

446
00:17:25,461 --> 00:17:26,962
Lisa, I met Lisa outside.

447
00:17:27,046 --> 00:17:28,565
- She's a sweetheart. She's nice.
- She's cool.

448
00:17:28,589 --> 00:17:30,049
- Yeah.
- She's tall.

449
00:17:30,132 --> 00:17:31,132
She's tall.

450
00:17:35,345 --> 00:17:37,306
- Do you want me to stomp it?
- I got it!

451
00:17:50,611 --> 00:17:52,404
Anyhow, yeah, just, you know, outside...

452
00:17:52,488 --> 00:17:54,215
- You know.
- I know. I wanted to get some air.

453
00:17:54,239 --> 00:17:55,425
- It's too much.
- Yeah, me too.

454
00:17:55,449 --> 00:17:57,218
- Have a smoke.
- Everybody's going crazy in there.

455
00:17:57,242 --> 00:17:58,720
It's kind of a nerve-wracking thing,
I guess.

456
00:17:58,744 --> 00:17:59,828
It is, yeah.

457
00:18:00,037 --> 00:18:00,913
Yeah.

458
00:18:01,038 --> 00:18:02,348
- Yeah, Kathleen wanted...
- Yeah, getting married.

459
00:18:02,372 --> 00:18:03,540
- Yeah.
- It's final.

460
00:18:03,624 --> 00:18:05,125
Have you ever been married?

461
00:18:05,209 --> 00:18:06,209
No.

462
00:18:07,419 --> 00:18:08,879
No, I'd love to get married.

463
00:18:09,838 --> 00:18:12,174
- Lisa seems pretty cool, right?
- She's alright.

464
00:18:13,884 --> 00:18:14,718
She's nice.

465
00:18:14,802 --> 00:18:16,112
- She seems so nice.
- She's sweet!

466
00:18:16,136 --> 00:18:17,136
Yeah.

467
00:18:17,471 --> 00:18:18,555
You know who's funny?

468
00:18:18,639 --> 00:18:19,639
Who's funny?

469
00:18:19,973 --> 00:18:21,183
- Kathleen.
- Oh, my God.

470
00:18:21,266 --> 00:18:22,494
- Are you kidding me?
- She's great.

471
00:18:22,518 --> 00:18:25,771
She is... She is so funny.

472
00:18:25,979 --> 00:18:26,855
She's beautiful.

473
00:18:26,939 --> 00:18:27,940
She's gorgeous.

474
00:18:28,398 --> 00:18:30,317
- Her hair and her eyes...
- Oh.

475
00:18:30,651 --> 00:18:31,485
Yeah.

476
00:18:31,568 --> 00:18:34,279
Do you ever just want to
go up nice and close

477
00:18:34,363 --> 00:18:35,572
and suck out her breath?

478
00:18:39,451 --> 00:18:40,285
You know?

479
00:18:40,369 --> 00:18:42,496
You said go... I'm sorry,
I must have misheard.

480
00:18:42,579 --> 00:18:43,664
You...

481
00:18:44,331 --> 00:18:45,771
You said go up nice and close and...

482
00:18:45,833 --> 00:18:48,127
You know, go up
nice and close to her and...

483
00:18:48,836 --> 00:18:51,255
get your mouth close to her mouth,
and suck her breath out,

484
00:18:51,338 --> 00:18:53,257
and now you have her breath in you...

485
00:18:54,424 --> 00:18:55,968
I've never heard that before.

486
00:18:56,844 --> 00:18:59,054
- Yeah, I don't know. In case we...
- Yeah.

487
00:19:00,097 --> 00:19:01,765
Probably... you know. I don't know.

488
00:19:01,849 --> 00:19:03,767
I've never done that, but I didn't know...

489
00:19:03,892 --> 00:19:05,644
Have you known her for some time?

490
00:19:06,562 --> 00:19:07,855
Yeah, you could say that.

491
00:19:10,149 --> 00:19:12,818
I mean, I'm her maid of honor.
I haven't heard her speak about you.

492
00:19:14,194 --> 00:19:15,194
What?

493
00:19:15,279 --> 00:19:17,072
She hasn't spoken about you.

494
00:19:17,239 --> 00:19:18,490
She hasn't spoken about me?

495
00:19:19,074 --> 00:19:20,074
Not once?

496
00:19:20,325 --> 00:19:21,493
That's crazy. Not once?

497
00:19:21,869 --> 00:19:23,829
Um... Short Paul, you said?

498
00:19:24,454 --> 00:19:26,707
Well, Paul. Everyone calls me Short Paul.

499
00:19:26,790 --> 00:19:28,000
- Paul.
- Yeah.

500
00:19:28,083 --> 00:19:29,751
Paul. I think I've heard of Paul.

501
00:19:29,835 --> 00:19:31,354
- I'm not...
- Wait, she talks about me

502
00:19:31,378 --> 00:19:33,178
and she doesn't say short,
she just says Paul?

503
00:19:33,672 --> 00:19:35,112
- Yeah. Why would...?
- Jesus Christ.

504
00:19:35,174 --> 00:19:36,174
What the heck?

505
00:19:40,262 --> 00:19:41,262
Give me a minute.

506
00:19:44,099 --> 00:19:45,893
You call <i>yourself </i>Short Paul.

507
00:19:46,518 --> 00:19:47,895
Yeah, because everybody does.

508
00:19:47,978 --> 00:19:50,147
I mean, it's just how these guys know me.

509
00:19:50,230 --> 00:19:51,064
But...

510
00:19:51,148 --> 00:19:52,357
I mean, internally...

511
00:19:52,649 --> 00:19:53,775
- Yeah.
- ...to myself...

512
00:19:54,568 --> 00:19:55,777
I am known as Paul.

513
00:19:57,237 --> 00:19:58,238
I'm Amber.

514
00:20:00,032 --> 00:20:01,032
Are you?

515
00:20:01,783 --> 00:20:03,785
I think so. Have we said anything else?

516
00:20:03,869 --> 00:20:06,955
I think we... said your name,
but I can't remember.

517
00:20:07,789 --> 00:20:09,917
- My nickname is Amber.
- I thought it was Lisa.

518
00:20:10,000 --> 00:20:11,585
Maybe. My nickname is Amber.

519
00:20:11,710 --> 00:20:14,213
Should we say Lisa?

520
00:20:14,296 --> 00:20:16,798
Your nick... your nickname is Amber?

521
00:20:17,090 --> 00:20:19,384
Your nickname is just another first name?

522
00:20:19,718 --> 00:20:20,844
It's easy. It's easy.

523
00:20:20,928 --> 00:20:23,347
For this moment,
it's easy for my nickname to be Amber.

524
00:20:23,430 --> 00:20:24,264
Okay.

525
00:20:24,389 --> 00:20:26,600
- You want me to call you by your nickname?
- Sure.

526
00:20:26,767 --> 00:20:27,767
Alright, Amber.

527
00:20:27,809 --> 00:20:28,644
Paul.

528
00:20:28,727 --> 00:20:30,270
- Yeah, Paul.
- Nice to meet you.

529
00:20:30,354 --> 00:20:31,730
- Good to meet you too.
- Yeah.

530
00:20:31,855 --> 00:20:33,899
- I actually love weddings.
- Wait. So then...

531
00:20:33,982 --> 00:20:35,734
Hold on. We've got to figure this out.

532
00:20:36,026 --> 00:20:37,587
I don't think there's much to figure out?

533
00:20:37,611 --> 00:20:39,571
No, because then I don't know

534
00:20:39,655 --> 00:20:41,698
if I know my girlfriend's name.

535
00:20:43,742 --> 00:20:45,786
- Lisa's your girlfriend.
- That's my girlfriend.

536
00:20:45,869 --> 00:20:47,269
I was trying to make you look good.

537
00:20:47,329 --> 00:20:48,956
Yeah. I didn't want to call you out

538
00:20:49,039 --> 00:20:51,041
that you were calling me your
girlfriend's name.

539
00:20:51,124 --> 00:20:53,835
- No, no, no, but you have a name.
- My name is Amber!

540
00:20:53,961 --> 00:20:55,504
It's Marie...

541
00:20:55,671 --> 00:20:57,005
- Marnie...
- Marnie.

542
00:20:57,798 --> 00:20:59,299
That's my sister's name.

543
00:20:59,633 --> 00:21:01,385
How do I forget my sister's name?

544
00:21:01,468 --> 00:21:02,302
Marnie.

545
00:21:02,386 --> 00:21:03,804
Your sister's name is Marnie?

546
00:21:03,887 --> 00:21:05,567
- I forgot that you said it.
- So, hold on,

547
00:21:05,639 --> 00:21:08,225
your parents named two daughters
Marnie and Marnie?

548
00:21:09,309 --> 00:21:11,144
No. I was... Never mind.

549
00:21:11,228 --> 00:21:12,228
Your... okay.

550
00:21:12,521 --> 00:21:13,438
Marnie.

551
00:21:13,522 --> 00:21:14,690
- Lovely to see you.
- Marnie.

552
00:21:14,773 --> 00:21:16,358
- Marnie. Yes.
- Marnie, AKA Amber.

553
00:21:16,441 --> 00:21:17,734
They're all...

554
00:21:17,985 --> 00:21:19,236
- Marnie...
- And I'm...

555
00:21:19,319 --> 00:21:21,530
- I'm Paul. AKA Short Paul.
- Paul. Lisa.

556
00:21:21,613 --> 00:21:23,007
- Lisa. Kathleen.
- And we know Kathleen.

557
00:21:23,031 --> 00:21:24,157
And we know Corey.

558
00:21:24,283 --> 00:21:25,784
And we know Dave, Danny...

559
00:21:25,867 --> 00:21:27,369
- Danny or Dave.
- Sebastian.

560
00:21:27,452 --> 00:21:29,092
And we can call that guy Dave
if you want.

561
00:21:29,162 --> 00:21:30,162
Sure.

562
00:21:31,873 --> 00:21:34,126
We got a lot of people
hanging out here today.

563
00:21:34,251 --> 00:21:35,711
Yeah, and we have so many more.

564
00:21:35,794 --> 00:21:37,462
- It's a fucking wedding.
- I know.

565
00:21:38,297 --> 00:21:39,881
I am... That's why I'm nervous.

566
00:21:39,965 --> 00:21:42,050
I'm actually...
I have to say a speech today.

567
00:21:42,134 --> 00:21:43,260
- Everybody's...
- Yeah?

568
00:21:43,343 --> 00:21:45,530
Yeah, and it's weird because
I get emotional when I think about

569
00:21:45,554 --> 00:21:48,348
my past and how we grew up together
and stuff like that. You know?

570
00:21:48,432 --> 00:21:50,017
- Yeah, sure. Sure.
- Yeah.

571
00:21:50,100 --> 00:21:51,685
Why? What happened in your past?

572
00:21:53,603 --> 00:21:54,855
I don't know. It's just...

573
00:21:55,856 --> 00:21:57,566
There's a thing that happened, right?

574
00:21:58,317 --> 00:21:59,317
Do I want to know?

575
00:21:59,901 --> 00:22:01,278
I don't think you want to know.

576
00:22:01,570 --> 00:22:03,238
- But...
- But I do want to know.

577
00:22:04,698 --> 00:22:05,615
But not even that.

578
00:22:05,699 --> 00:22:08,744
Even thinking about the past
makes me realize how much I've grown

579
00:22:08,827 --> 00:22:11,163
- and how much of my life is over.
- That's crazy.

580
00:22:11,246 --> 00:22:14,183
- Weddings scare me because of that.
- I had something happen in my past too.

581
00:22:14,207 --> 00:22:15,334
What? Tell me, please.

582
00:22:17,586 --> 00:22:18,837
Do you want me to shuffle it?

583
00:22:24,926 --> 00:22:26,803
Okay. Not a lot of people know this,

584
00:22:26,887 --> 00:22:29,264
but me and Kathleen, we used to...

585
00:22:29,348 --> 00:22:30,849
we used to go steady.

586
00:22:31,433 --> 00:22:33,226
- You and Kathleen?
- Yeah.

587
00:22:33,310 --> 00:22:35,395
That's insane. I've known her
for, like, 15 years.

588
00:22:35,479 --> 00:22:36,839
- When...?
- Ages ago, before then.

589
00:22:36,897 --> 00:22:37,731
When? What year?

590
00:22:37,814 --> 00:22:38,732
I was in sixth grade.

591
00:22:38,815 --> 00:22:40,650
I don't know how old that makes you.

592
00:22:41,777 --> 00:22:43,487
- Twelve?
- Fourteen, maybe?

593
00:22:43,570 --> 00:22:45,989
- No, fourteen, you're at grade eight.
- No, twelve.

594
00:22:46,073 --> 00:22:47,115
It is twelve.

595
00:22:47,199 --> 00:22:49,677
Because that's when I went to
a bunch of bar mitzvahs and bat mitzvahs.

596
00:22:49,701 --> 00:22:50,827
Like, right that year after.

597
00:22:50,952 --> 00:22:52,204
I'd say sixth or seventh grade.

598
00:22:52,287 --> 00:22:53,538
- Okay, cool.
- Cool.

599
00:22:54,164 --> 00:22:55,665
You guys went out? Did you...?

600
00:22:55,749 --> 00:22:58,001
Sixth grade. Did you kiss or anything?

601
00:22:58,126 --> 00:22:59,211
Um...

602
00:22:59,294 --> 00:23:00,294
We made love.

603
00:23:09,221 --> 00:23:10,764
We made love under the moon.

604
00:23:11,681 --> 00:23:13,809
- When you were in sixth grade?
- For nights on end.

605
00:23:13,892 --> 00:23:15,685
We couldn't get enough of each other.

606
00:23:16,144 --> 00:23:18,522
I wrote a poem, she wrote me poems.

607
00:23:19,731 --> 00:23:22,192
We got in trouble together,
we ran from the law.

608
00:23:23,485 --> 00:23:25,028
We crossed state lines.

609
00:23:25,112 --> 00:23:27,155
We thought about moving to Germany.

610
00:23:28,156 --> 00:23:29,658
As sixth graders?

611
00:23:31,326 --> 00:23:32,702
How long did this all last?

612
00:23:32,786 --> 00:23:33,829
Ah... It's...

613
00:23:34,746 --> 00:23:37,791
You know, the brightest suns
burn the briefest.

614
00:23:39,042 --> 00:23:41,711
There's just the one sun,
we just have the one sun.

615
00:23:44,131 --> 00:23:47,676
You are telling me that
the entire universe has only one sun?

616
00:23:47,759 --> 00:23:49,404
- That we know of.
- Are you a flat-earther?

617
00:23:49,428 --> 00:23:51,012
No. No.

618
00:23:51,471 --> 00:23:53,271
But I do think
if I had slippery enough shoes,

619
00:23:53,306 --> 00:23:56,059
and you took me to one part,
I could slide all the way to the end.

620
00:23:56,268 --> 00:23:57,519
- It doesn't matter.
- What?

621
00:23:58,728 --> 00:23:59,980
- What?
- Listen, listen...

622
00:24:01,356 --> 00:24:03,942
Your... your...
What?

623
00:24:04,025 --> 00:24:05,694
Your theory on the world is that

624
00:24:05,777 --> 00:24:07,571
if you had slippery enough shoes...

625
00:24:07,654 --> 00:24:08,697
This is what I'm thinking.

626
00:24:08,780 --> 00:24:10,532
...you could fly
from one end to the other.

627
00:24:10,615 --> 00:24:11,825
Yeah. Can I explain myself?

628
00:24:11,950 --> 00:24:13,344
- Please do.
- You're yelling at me.

629
00:24:13,368 --> 00:24:15,162
I don't think the world is flat.

630
00:24:15,245 --> 00:24:16,472
I don't think the Earth is flat.

631
00:24:16,496 --> 00:24:17,598
- Okay.
- I think it's round.

632
00:24:17,622 --> 00:24:20,167
And because it's round,
if you get enough momentum...

633
00:24:21,168 --> 00:24:22,544
you'll just slide around.

634
00:24:22,627 --> 00:24:23,712
All the way around.

635
00:24:24,463 --> 00:24:26,465
- That's insane.
- I mean, yeah, I mean...

636
00:24:27,048 --> 00:24:29,342
I suppose if you had
slippery enough shoes.

637
00:24:31,386 --> 00:24:32,637
What happened? How did it end?

638
00:24:34,473 --> 00:24:36,933
- Ah. It's embarrassing.
- Paul, come on.

639
00:24:37,017 --> 00:24:37,934
It's embarrassing?

640
00:24:38,018 --> 00:24:40,479
You already told me
you made love in sixth grade.

641
00:24:40,812 --> 00:24:41,855
Um...

642
00:24:42,856 --> 00:24:43,856
Well...

643
00:24:46,735 --> 00:24:47,735
One night...

644
00:24:48,320 --> 00:24:49,362
It's a story?

645
00:24:52,365 --> 00:24:53,700
We were in a taxi cab.

646
00:24:56,953 --> 00:24:58,663
- We had just...
- Sixth grade still?

647
00:24:58,747 --> 00:25:01,875
We had just seen...
We had just... seen the opera...

648
00:25:03,251 --> 00:25:04,920
Oh, very cool.

649
00:25:06,129 --> 00:25:09,549
Um...in our weekend finest duds.

650
00:25:09,925 --> 00:25:10,926
And...

651
00:25:12,594 --> 00:25:14,930
We're walking... uh...

652
00:25:15,305 --> 00:25:16,598
down an alleyway...

653
00:25:17,974 --> 00:25:19,309
and... uh...

654
00:25:21,561 --> 00:25:23,688
I think I know what's going to happen.

655
00:25:24,314 --> 00:25:25,357
And I love it.

656
00:25:25,440 --> 00:25:26,775
- Do you?
- I love it. Yeah.

657
00:25:26,858 --> 00:25:28,985
And... and a guy...

658
00:25:29,611 --> 00:25:32,155
- Can I guess?
- And a guy came out...

659
00:25:32,531 --> 00:25:33,823
in a clown mask.

660
00:25:34,699 --> 00:25:36,117
Did he try to steal her pearls?

661
00:25:36,201 --> 00:25:37,577
He tried to steal the pearls.

662
00:25:38,203 --> 00:25:39,371
Did they go everywhere?

663
00:25:39,454 --> 00:25:40,622
They went everywhere.

664
00:25:41,081 --> 00:25:42,499
And a kid was watching.

665
00:25:44,751 --> 00:25:46,253
Was that kid Dave?

666
00:25:47,879 --> 00:25:48,880
Yeah.

667
00:25:50,632 --> 00:25:52,425
That's... that's incredible.

668
00:25:52,509 --> 00:25:54,010
And, and, and I... Wait...

669
00:25:54,094 --> 00:25:56,680
Because that's not even all that
embarrassing,

670
00:25:57,556 --> 00:26:00,100
but then the guy
with the clown mask slipped,

671
00:26:00,183 --> 00:26:01,726
and the gun went in the air,

672
00:26:01,810 --> 00:26:03,186
and I tried to grab it.

673
00:26:04,896 --> 00:26:07,190
And then I... I shot...

674
00:26:07,357 --> 00:26:09,568
the guy in the clown mask?

675
00:26:10,026 --> 00:26:12,696
I don't know why you're looking at me
like you're confused.

676
00:26:14,155 --> 00:26:15,198
And he's gone.

677
00:26:15,824 --> 00:26:17,909
- And you look like the fool.
- And I had one moment

678
00:26:17,993 --> 00:26:19,953
to say a really cool line

679
00:26:20,036 --> 00:26:22,414
like, "Nice try, clown."

680
00:26:24,124 --> 00:26:25,292
But instead...

681
00:26:26,418 --> 00:26:27,418
I said...

682
00:26:28,044 --> 00:26:30,005
"Oopsie, woopsies."

683
00:26:32,382 --> 00:26:34,551
You said, "Oopsie, woopsies?"

684
00:26:35,510 --> 00:26:38,263
And Kathleen,
she looks to me like I'm crazy.

685
00:26:41,391 --> 00:26:43,184
I don't want to kill the guy. Ah...

686
00:26:43,310 --> 00:26:45,204
- This is crazy.
- I've been to therapy every year

687
00:26:45,228 --> 00:26:46,228
of my life.

688
00:26:46,313 --> 00:26:47,439
Did you go to jail?

689
00:26:47,564 --> 00:26:49,065
Is that why she didn't see you?

690
00:26:49,149 --> 00:26:50,483
- No, I...
- What happened?

691
00:26:50,567 --> 00:26:52,527
The police were like,
"Yeah, self defense."

692
00:26:53,695 --> 00:26:55,155
But, did you say something cool?

693
00:26:55,238 --> 00:26:57,991
- Like, "Get out of my life, clown."
- "Oopsie, doopsies."

694
00:26:58,450 --> 00:27:01,036
I said. "Oopsie, doopsies,"
and then the whole...

695
00:27:01,119 --> 00:27:02,388
- This is insane.
- Cops laughed at me.

696
00:27:02,412 --> 00:27:05,290
When I met Dave, the story that he tells
even though he's like,

697
00:27:05,373 --> 00:27:06,813
"I don't want to tell it right now."

698
00:27:06,875 --> 00:27:08,293
- Yeah?
- The story he tells,

699
00:27:08,418 --> 00:27:10,879
is that he saved her from a robber?

700
00:27:11,755 --> 00:27:13,089
That's what he said.

701
00:27:14,049 --> 00:27:15,049
I'm sorry, what?

702
00:27:15,925 --> 00:27:17,844
They said they met
when they were really young,

703
00:27:17,927 --> 00:27:20,221
like seventh grade
or something like that. Right?

704
00:27:20,305 --> 00:27:22,891
And he said that he saved her
from being robbed.

705
00:27:23,725 --> 00:27:24,976
That's how they met.

706
00:27:30,523 --> 00:27:31,524
Oh, God.

707
00:27:33,735 --> 00:27:35,403
You ever have a time in your life

708
00:27:35,487 --> 00:27:37,489
when you think you might
come to a conclusion,

709
00:27:37,572 --> 00:27:39,532
and then you think, "Maybe I'll just
wait it out,"

710
00:27:39,574 --> 00:27:40,614
but then something happens

711
00:27:40,659 --> 00:27:42,702
and you're like, "No I'm definitely
going to do it."

712
00:27:47,290 --> 00:27:48,667
Come on. It's starting.

713
00:27:48,750 --> 00:27:50,502
- I'll see you in a bit. Okay?
- Okay.

714
00:27:50,627 --> 00:27:52,253
Alright. Bye. Bye, Amber.

715
00:27:52,337 --> 00:27:53,546
- Take care. Marnie.
- Yeah.

716
00:27:53,630 --> 00:27:55,131
- You can call me Marnie.
- Okay.

717
00:27:58,218 --> 00:28:00,470
And so the time has come...

718
00:28:02,305 --> 00:28:03,306
Revenge.

719
00:28:05,308 --> 00:28:06,308
Vengeance.

720
00:28:07,519 --> 00:28:08,519
Revengeance.

721
00:28:11,731 --> 00:28:14,401
Dave, if that is your real name,

722
00:28:17,028 --> 00:28:18,571
you will lose tonight,

723
00:28:19,531 --> 00:28:21,783
and Kathleen, you will be mine.

724
00:28:22,951 --> 00:28:24,369
Sweet Kathleen.

725
00:28:25,620 --> 00:28:27,372
I will take your breath.

726
00:28:32,252 --> 00:28:34,379
Okay, I'm, um, um, I'm ready.

727
00:28:35,338 --> 00:28:37,006
Yeah. Is she coming? Is Kathleen coming?

728
00:28:37,090 --> 00:28:38,401
Do I see her when we go down the aisle?

729
00:28:38,425 --> 00:28:40,569
Is the first time I see her right when
this happens? When do I see her?

730
00:28:40,593 --> 00:28:41,761
I don't know.

731
00:28:41,928 --> 00:28:42,928
Who are you?

732
00:28:43,138 --> 00:28:44,139
I'm a ghost.

733
00:28:44,222 --> 00:28:45,473
Oh!

734
00:28:46,182 --> 00:28:47,600
Whoo, whoo, what?

735
00:28:47,684 --> 00:28:48,768
You're a ghost?

736
00:28:49,144 --> 00:28:51,771
You can't just say you're a ghost
then disappear.

737
00:28:52,522 --> 00:28:54,482
We'll find out who you are later.

738
00:28:55,775 --> 00:28:57,861
Okay, okay, okay.

739
00:28:59,028 --> 00:29:00,739
Okay, okay, okay, okay.

740
00:29:02,866 --> 00:29:05,243
Corey? Corey!

741
00:29:06,244 --> 00:29:08,204
Corey! Hey man,
I need my best man for a second.

742
00:29:08,288 --> 00:29:09,205
- Okay?
- Yeah, I got you.

743
00:29:09,289 --> 00:29:10,707
I couldn't find Short Paul.

744
00:29:11,166 --> 00:29:13,042
I... I... I don't know...
I don't... I don't...

745
00:29:13,126 --> 00:29:14,627
You didn't get to talk to him at all?

746
00:29:14,711 --> 00:29:16,629
No, no, I couldn't find him.

747
00:29:16,713 --> 00:29:18,214
Just sit next to him if you see him,

748
00:29:18,298 --> 00:29:20,341
and just make sure he's going to be fine

749
00:29:20,425 --> 00:29:21,736
- and not say anything mean.
- Okay.

750
00:29:21,760 --> 00:29:22,802
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- Okay.

751
00:29:22,886 --> 00:29:23,928
Alright, do I look okay?

752
00:29:24,471 --> 00:29:25,471
- Yeah.
- Okay.

753
00:29:25,513 --> 00:29:26,824
We're going down, but I don't know...

754
00:29:26,848 --> 00:29:28,951
When does Kathleen come?
When's the part where we walk down...?

755
00:29:28,975 --> 00:29:30,643
We announce you, then you come out.

756
00:29:30,727 --> 00:29:33,354
And then we announce Kathleen,
then she comes out.

757
00:29:33,521 --> 00:29:34,731
Then we do the ceremony.

758
00:29:34,814 --> 00:29:35,940
- Okay.
- Okay.

759
00:29:36,024 --> 00:29:37,650
Alright.

760
00:29:37,734 --> 00:29:38,902
I wish we had a handshake,

761
00:29:38,985 --> 00:29:40,820
but we haven't known each other
long enough.

762
00:29:41,738 --> 00:29:42,738
Cool, alright.

763
00:29:49,704 --> 00:29:50,704
Stay here.

764
00:29:55,710 --> 00:29:56,753
Introducing...

765
00:29:58,046 --> 00:30:00,048
Dave, the groom...

766
00:30:09,098 --> 00:30:10,809
Motherfucker, that's my brother.

767
00:30:11,226 --> 00:30:12,268
That's my brother.

768
00:30:12,393 --> 00:30:14,270
Hey. Come on. Give it up.

769
00:30:14,646 --> 00:30:15,646
Give it up.

770
00:30:15,939 --> 00:30:17,065
Come on, give it up.

771
00:30:17,148 --> 00:30:19,210
- Come on, Dave!
- I think you're supposed to be up there.

772
00:30:19,234 --> 00:30:20,234
Oh, shit.

773
00:30:21,110 --> 00:30:23,029
Yeah, I guess I'll
be all the way in the back,

774
00:30:23,112 --> 00:30:25,114
the last fucking person on the line.

775
00:30:25,532 --> 00:30:27,700
Oh, oh! I won't make a big deal out of it.

776
00:30:31,955 --> 00:30:33,581
That's my boy.

777
00:30:35,834 --> 00:30:37,210
You're his father.

778
00:30:37,293 --> 00:30:38,336
I'm their father.

779
00:30:38,419 --> 00:30:40,255
Oh, amazing.

780
00:30:40,338 --> 00:30:41,214
And...

781
00:30:41,297 --> 00:30:42,757
I guess I'm their mom, then.

782
00:30:44,843 --> 00:30:47,679
- Nice to meet you.
- Lovely to meet you.

783
00:30:49,222 --> 00:30:51,266
Ah, I'm so...

784
00:30:52,016 --> 00:30:54,394
I'm, like, so excited. Ah...

785
00:30:54,811 --> 00:30:56,771
I knew, I knew Dave would get married.

786
00:30:56,855 --> 00:30:58,123
- Yeah.
- Do you know what I mean?

787
00:30:58,147 --> 00:30:59,500
We knew it in the back of our minds.

788
00:30:59,524 --> 00:31:01,276
Yeah. Oh.

789
00:31:01,776 --> 00:31:02,819
Just loosen up a bit.

790
00:31:02,944 --> 00:31:04,070
Okay, loosen up a bit.

791
00:31:04,237 --> 00:31:05,697
- I'm loose.
- Okay.

792
00:31:05,780 --> 00:31:07,323
I just want you to be loose, okay?

793
00:31:07,448 --> 00:31:08,867
- I'm loose!
- Shush!

794
00:31:10,535 --> 00:31:13,079
Don't tell me to loosen up
when I'm already loose.

795
00:31:13,162 --> 00:31:14,747
- That tightens me.
- Harold!

796
00:31:14,831 --> 00:31:15,665
Harold!

797
00:31:15,790 --> 00:31:17,709
- Harold!
- Do you want me tight or loose?

798
00:31:17,792 --> 00:31:18,877
I want you loose, Harold.

799
00:31:18,960 --> 00:31:22,714
Then don't 'aks' me to be loose.

800
00:31:23,339 --> 00:31:25,859
What do you want me to do?
How do you want me to make you loose?

801
00:31:26,509 --> 00:31:29,971
By not asking me to be loooooose!

802
00:31:35,435 --> 00:31:38,187
I'm, I'm sorry, is everything okay?
Are you okay?

803
00:31:38,813 --> 00:31:39,814
I'm fine!

804
00:31:40,356 --> 00:31:41,356
You're very tense.

805
00:31:41,399 --> 00:31:43,151
I'm loose!

806
00:31:43,860 --> 00:31:45,904
I don't even know you!

807
00:31:46,779 --> 00:31:48,573
Oh, sorry, sorry.

808
00:31:49,324 --> 00:31:51,492
I'm the father of the bride.

809
00:31:52,744 --> 00:31:54,388
- Why are you on this side?
- Shush!

810
00:31:54,412 --> 00:31:55,747
Harold! Harold!

811
00:31:55,830 --> 00:31:57,266
There's a whole other side.

812
00:31:57,290 --> 00:31:58,708
Harold! Harold!

813
00:31:58,791 --> 00:32:00,686
- By the way, pleasure to meet you.
- Lovely to meet you.

814
00:32:00,710 --> 00:32:03,504
I feel like we should have met before
at some point in time.

815
00:32:03,963 --> 00:32:05,965
Oh my God, it is so nice to meet you.

816
00:32:06,174 --> 00:32:08,885
- It's so nice to meet you.
- I'm, I'm the mother of the bride.

817
00:32:09,802 --> 00:32:11,137
Oh, nice to meet you.

818
00:32:11,220 --> 00:32:13,140
Pleasure to meet you too
for the very first time.

819
00:32:13,222 --> 00:32:14,557
How are you!

820
00:32:15,266 --> 00:32:16,726
Good, I'm fine. Are you okay?

821
00:32:16,809 --> 00:32:19,103
I'm fucking loose, baby.

822
00:32:19,979 --> 00:32:21,856
Everybody's asking me if I'm loose.

823
00:32:22,148 --> 00:32:23,650
What about you? Are you loose?

824
00:32:24,150 --> 00:32:25,610
I'm... loose as a caboose.

825
00:32:25,693 --> 00:32:27,880
I don't think you should...
ask a woman if...

826
00:32:27,904 --> 00:32:29,489
Say it. Loose as a...

827
00:32:29,572 --> 00:32:31,616
- You were about to say it. Say it.
- But I...

828
00:32:31,699 --> 00:32:33,785
Say it. I've never
heard the phrase before.

829
00:32:33,868 --> 00:32:35,620
It's not something you ask a lady.

830
00:32:35,703 --> 00:32:37,246
But I am loose as a caboose.

831
00:32:38,748 --> 00:32:40,833
- We do like to have fun.
- We have fun.

832
00:32:40,917 --> 00:32:42,686
- We do like to have fun.
- We're quite... We're...

833
00:32:42,710 --> 00:32:45,797
We're half a bottle into a chardonnay.

834
00:32:46,130 --> 00:32:48,132
- Oh! That's so lovely.
- Can I pour you...?

835
00:32:48,216 --> 00:32:49,759
We've got...

836
00:32:49,842 --> 00:32:51,469
We've already started drinking.

837
00:32:52,720 --> 00:32:54,055
I would love some. Is that okay?

838
00:32:54,138 --> 00:32:55,574
- Yeah, sure.
- To the bride and groom.

839
00:32:55,598 --> 00:32:56,598
Takes the edge off.

840
00:32:56,641 --> 00:32:57,475
Yeah, sure, oh...

841
00:32:57,558 --> 00:32:58,393
Well...

842
00:33:00,061 --> 00:33:01,781
Here you go.
Knocked that back pretty quick.

843
00:33:01,854 --> 00:33:04,440
Well, okay, now I have your trash.
Thank you.

844
00:33:06,901 --> 00:33:07,735
Okay.

845
00:33:07,819 --> 00:33:08,819
I'm ready.

846
00:33:09,612 --> 00:33:11,781
I'm ready if you want to play the trumpet.

847
00:33:12,824 --> 00:33:16,661
I can't... I don't really know...
many musical instruments.

848
00:33:16,744 --> 00:33:18,997
That's fine. Just whatever you can do.
Please.

849
00:33:19,163 --> 00:33:21,040
You're my maid of honor.
Just do your thing.

850
00:33:21,124 --> 00:33:22,667
What do they have in here?

851
00:33:22,792 --> 00:33:23,792
Ah...

852
00:33:24,419 --> 00:33:25,253
Marnie!

853
00:33:25,378 --> 00:33:26,855
- Marnie, come on, quick.
- I know. I know.

854
00:33:26,879 --> 00:33:28,857
- I've got to find something that I can...
- Everybody's waiting.

855
00:33:28,881 --> 00:33:29,716
Jesus Chri...

856
00:33:29,799 --> 00:33:31,318
Agh, I just realized that it's so weird

857
00:33:31,342 --> 00:33:34,595
that our parents aren't bringing us
down the aisle. Keep going. Yeah.

858
00:33:34,679 --> 00:33:36,389
Yeah, that's the weirdest part.

859
00:33:40,643 --> 00:33:43,730
Now presenting... Kathleen.

860
00:34:05,543 --> 00:34:07,003
If...

861
00:34:08,254 --> 00:34:10,923
If that side is the groom's side

862
00:34:11,632 --> 00:34:13,092
and the bride's side...

863
00:34:14,343 --> 00:34:17,555
- What?
- We're all people from the music festival.

864
00:34:21,100 --> 00:34:22,643
Yeah!

865
00:34:29,776 --> 00:34:32,862
<i>♪ Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa,
whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa ♪</i>

866
00:34:32,945 --> 00:34:33,945
<i>♪ Rock and roll ♪</i>

867
00:34:33,988 --> 00:34:35,907
<i>♪ Rock and rock
and roll, roll, roll, roll ♪</i>

868
00:34:35,990 --> 00:34:37,366
<i>♪ Rock and rock and roll ♪</i>

869
00:34:37,450 --> 00:34:39,660
<i>♪ Pooh, rock and rock and roll,
roll, roll, roll ♪</i>

870
00:34:39,744 --> 00:34:41,662
<i>♪ - Rock and rock and roll
- Say what</i> ♪

871
00:34:41,746 --> 00:34:43,664
<i>♪ Rock and rock and roll ♪</i>

872
00:34:43,748 --> 00:34:45,041
<i>♪ Rock and rock and roll ♪</i>

873
00:34:48,127 --> 00:34:49,170
Oh, yeah.

874
00:34:57,303 --> 00:35:00,431
Wooooooh...

875
00:35:04,727 --> 00:35:05,727
Ah...

876
00:35:06,854 --> 00:35:08,022
Ah...

877
00:35:10,233 --> 00:35:13,111
We are gathered here today...

878
00:35:15,822 --> 00:35:17,406
to witness...

879
00:35:18,157 --> 00:35:19,492
the union...

880
00:35:20,243 --> 00:35:22,370
of Dave and Kathleen.

881
00:35:24,831 --> 00:35:27,208
I am your officiator.

882
00:35:27,834 --> 00:35:29,335
- A ghost?
- A ghost.

883
00:35:33,422 --> 00:35:34,422
And...

884
00:35:35,216 --> 00:35:38,553
I want... everyone here,

885
00:35:38,636 --> 00:35:39,804
both the family

886
00:35:40,346 --> 00:35:43,182
and the rock and roll enthusiasts...

887
00:35:44,142 --> 00:35:45,601
Is that a fucking ghost?

888
00:35:47,019 --> 00:35:48,437
Remember, stay loose.

889
00:35:54,735 --> 00:35:56,070
...to witness

890
00:35:56,737 --> 00:35:58,698
the bond of love

891
00:35:59,448 --> 00:36:02,702
between these two individuals.

892
00:36:03,369 --> 00:36:05,246
I love you.

893
00:36:06,247 --> 00:36:08,291
We are both here...

894
00:36:08,791 --> 00:36:10,877
under our own volition.

895
00:36:11,669 --> 00:36:12,837
Yes, of course.

896
00:36:12,920 --> 00:36:15,047
We are both here under our own volition.

897
00:36:15,214 --> 00:36:17,925
I don't think this is part
of the wedding ceremony.

898
00:36:18,134 --> 00:36:19,302
Yes, of course. We are.

899
00:36:19,760 --> 00:36:20,760
We love each other.

900
00:36:22,972 --> 00:36:24,182
No one is here...

901
00:36:25,725 --> 00:36:27,310
out of any type of...

902
00:36:27,435 --> 00:36:29,395
bribery or extortion?

903
00:36:32,231 --> 00:36:35,276
Has this happened enough times
where you have to ask this?

904
00:36:35,651 --> 00:36:36,903
This is how I do it.

905
00:36:37,945 --> 00:36:39,864
- You asked me...
- I'm fine. We're good.

906
00:36:39,947 --> 00:36:41,073
And you?

907
00:36:41,240 --> 00:36:43,075
Mm... I wish I was fucking closer.

908
00:36:43,159 --> 00:36:44,035
Did you ask that?

909
00:36:44,118 --> 00:36:45,679
- I wish I was fucking closer.
- Oh, yeah.

910
00:36:45,703 --> 00:36:48,206
Does anyone wish they were closer?

911
00:36:48,289 --> 00:36:49,582
Yeah. Me, man.

912
00:36:49,665 --> 00:36:51,042
I wish I was fucking closer.

913
00:36:51,125 --> 00:36:52,251
Can I get over there?

914
00:36:52,793 --> 00:36:53,878
No, Sebastian.

915
00:36:53,961 --> 00:36:55,189
What do you want me to do?
Be over there?

916
00:36:55,213 --> 00:36:56,839
- Yeah.
- I'm a motherfucking butterfly.

917
00:36:56,923 --> 00:36:59,443
You gonna make me be a worm?
Is that what turns into a butterfly?

918
00:36:59,467 --> 00:37:01,469
No, that's going. No, no!

919
00:37:01,552 --> 00:37:03,054
Oh, yeah. Ah...

920
00:37:03,137 --> 00:37:05,640
- Caterpillar. Fuck you.
- You're doing, you're doing...

921
00:37:05,723 --> 00:37:08,392
you're doing exactly what I didn't
want you to do.

922
00:37:08,476 --> 00:37:09,936
It's still happening anyways.

923
00:37:10,019 --> 00:37:11,455
When you tell someone not to do
something,

924
00:37:11,479 --> 00:37:12,799
you know, they're going to do it.

925
00:37:13,147 --> 00:37:14,190
Tell me about it.

926
00:37:16,817 --> 00:37:19,737
Jesus Christ!

927
00:37:19,820 --> 00:37:21,072
Okay, very good.

928
00:37:23,866 --> 00:37:25,326
May I continue by saying...?

929
00:37:25,451 --> 00:37:27,745
Ooooooh!

930
00:37:28,454 --> 00:37:29,454
You may.

931
00:37:29,538 --> 00:37:31,332
Um... you may.

932
00:37:32,625 --> 00:37:33,625
Now...

933
00:37:34,043 --> 00:37:36,379
as so saith the scripture.

934
00:37:36,963 --> 00:37:38,673
both of you are in love,

935
00:37:39,340 --> 00:37:40,967
you have prepared your own vows.

936
00:37:41,050 --> 00:37:41,884
But...

937
00:37:42,051 --> 00:37:44,345
before we get to those vows...

938
00:37:44,929 --> 00:37:46,097
as per the doctrine...

939
00:37:46,931 --> 00:37:48,099
I must ask...

940
00:37:49,433 --> 00:37:51,894
Does anybody have anything mean
to say?

941
00:37:58,276 --> 00:38:00,987
What the fuck is this?
"Anybody have anything mean to say?"

942
00:38:01,070 --> 00:38:02,321
Yeah, I dos.

943
00:38:08,452 --> 00:38:11,122
Um... okay,
the short gentleman in the back.

944
00:38:12,540 --> 00:38:13,540
Paul.

945
00:38:15,042 --> 00:38:16,711
My name is Paul.

946
00:38:23,759 --> 00:38:26,137
What're you doing?
You'll ruin the whole thing for them.

947
00:38:26,262 --> 00:38:27,722
I got something mean to say.

948
00:38:29,056 --> 00:38:31,559
This is my daughter's special day. Okay?

949
00:38:33,352 --> 00:38:35,896
Well, if it's so special,
why are you half... lit?

950
00:38:38,733 --> 00:38:39,817
Because I'm not sure.

951
00:38:41,694 --> 00:38:42,862
Okay. Jesus.

952
00:38:44,822 --> 00:38:45,822
You!

953
00:38:47,033 --> 00:38:48,033
You.

954
00:38:55,541 --> 00:38:57,626
This whole time, all these years...

955
00:38:58,252 --> 00:39:00,796
you've been telling everybody,
her included.

956
00:39:01,547 --> 00:39:02,715
Paul, what are you doing?

957
00:39:03,424 --> 00:39:05,104
- Paul, what are you doing?
- Her included.

958
00:39:05,176 --> 00:39:07,303
What are you doing?
Paul, what are you doing?

959
00:39:07,928 --> 00:39:08,929
Don't make me...

960
00:39:13,351 --> 00:39:14,518
Listen to me.

961
00:39:16,854 --> 00:39:20,107
- What the fuck are you doing?
- That way back when in the alleyway,

962
00:39:20,191 --> 00:39:22,943
when I stopped the clown robber,

963
00:39:23,444 --> 00:39:25,696
it was you who stopped the clown robber.

964
00:39:26,197 --> 00:39:29,575
Were you just taking credit
just because I said "Whoopsie, doopsie?"

965
00:39:30,201 --> 00:39:31,911
What's the real...
What's... what's...

966
00:39:31,994 --> 00:39:33,454
You know, I stopped her.

967
00:39:33,537 --> 00:39:35,664
You should stop talking right now. Okay?

968
00:39:36,165 --> 00:39:37,708
Paul, you had your chance.

969
00:39:38,250 --> 00:39:39,293
What are you doing?

970
00:39:39,377 --> 00:39:41,587
You're embarrassing me.
My parents are here.

971
00:39:41,670 --> 00:39:44,048
My entire parking lot is here.

972
00:39:48,719 --> 00:39:51,305
Don't. Just... Okay, good.

973
00:39:51,555 --> 00:39:53,474
I got something mean to say?

974
00:39:55,810 --> 00:39:57,269
I'll allow it.

975
00:39:59,563 --> 00:40:00,481
Okay, get it over quick.

976
00:40:00,564 --> 00:40:03,609
Taking credit for other people's murders
is not cool.

977
00:40:08,322 --> 00:40:10,741
Especially when the consequences
are true love.

978
00:40:11,325 --> 00:40:13,911
A love that I always had
and will never know again.

979
00:40:14,036 --> 00:40:15,036
Sorry, Lisa.

980
00:40:15,079 --> 00:40:16,079
You're alright.

981
00:40:17,915 --> 00:40:18,915
You're fine.

982
00:40:18,999 --> 00:40:21,252
I didn't even want
to come to this wedding.

983
00:40:27,383 --> 00:40:32,430
Excuse me. Excuse me. Excuse me.
Excuse me. Excuse me.

984
00:40:32,847 --> 00:40:35,015
Sorry, the show's already started.
You can't leave.

985
00:40:38,644 --> 00:40:41,355
You got the bouncer
from the music festival

986
00:40:41,439 --> 00:40:42,606
to come to the wedding?

987
00:40:43,732 --> 00:40:45,484
Alright, make it quick, Paul.

988
00:40:47,945 --> 00:40:49,280
I'll allow it.

989
00:40:52,491 --> 00:40:55,119
If you're the type of guy that steals
other people's murders

990
00:40:55,202 --> 00:40:57,955
and, consequently,
steals other people's true loves...

991
00:40:59,415 --> 00:41:00,415
then you...

992
00:41:01,750 --> 00:41:05,963
are some kind of fucking... du... dumbass.

993
00:41:08,632 --> 00:41:09,632
Hey.

994
00:41:13,304 --> 00:41:14,722
- Shit!
- He fucking blew it.

995
00:41:14,805 --> 00:41:17,391
He could have said the perfect thing
and he blew it.

996
00:41:20,060 --> 00:41:20,936
Shit!

997
00:41:21,020 --> 00:41:22,771
Hey Paul, you know what?

998
00:41:22,897 --> 00:41:24,690
Why don't we let the lady decide.

999
00:41:24,815 --> 00:41:27,067
You really think you
had something with her?

1000
00:41:28,027 --> 00:41:29,987
Oh, yeah, of course I did.

1001
00:41:30,404 --> 00:41:31,530
Then let her decide.

1002
00:41:33,115 --> 00:41:34,533
I'll allow it.

1003
00:41:36,076 --> 00:41:37,076
Honey.

1004
00:41:37,161 --> 00:41:39,413
- Honey, look at me.
- The rules state...

1005
00:41:40,456 --> 00:41:43,125
if something is said that's mean enough,

1006
00:41:44,126 --> 00:41:47,254
on the spot, the lady can decide.

1007
00:41:49,673 --> 00:41:51,217
- Oh!
- This is easy.

1008
00:41:51,300 --> 00:41:53,427
I've been dating you
since the seventh grade.

1009
00:41:53,511 --> 00:41:55,179
- Well...
- Okay? Just look at Paul.

1010
00:41:55,262 --> 00:41:57,515
Paul's been dating me
since the sixth grade.

1011
00:41:57,640 --> 00:42:00,434
I mean, not actively.
We just had a moment.

1012
00:42:00,726 --> 00:42:01,936
A moment in 6th grade.

1013
00:42:02,019 --> 00:42:03,479
- What did you do, kiss?
- Uh, mm.

1014
00:42:03,979 --> 00:42:06,941
Oh, hooooo...

1015
00:42:07,066 --> 00:42:08,108
Oh, baby!

1016
00:42:08,526 --> 00:42:11,779
Tell 'em. Tell 'em. Tell 'em.

1017
00:42:12,655 --> 00:42:15,741
Why is there a microphone being lowered?
Um...

1018
00:42:16,575 --> 00:42:17,910
Uh...

1019
00:42:18,035 --> 00:42:19,578
I...

1020
00:42:19,870 --> 00:42:21,664
We did a little bit more than kiss.

1021
00:42:23,123 --> 00:42:24,250
In sixth grade?

1022
00:42:24,542 --> 00:42:27,086
Yeah. We made sweet, sweet love.

1023
00:42:28,546 --> 00:42:31,298
We made love every kind of way
you could ever dream of.

1024
00:42:32,049 --> 00:42:33,759
We did it romantic style.

1025
00:42:33,842 --> 00:42:35,177
We did it nasty style.

1026
00:42:36,178 --> 00:42:38,472
We went to peep shows and got all excited

1027
00:42:38,556 --> 00:42:40,516
and then fucked on the dirty little...

1028
00:42:41,225 --> 00:42:42,810
sofas at the peep shows.

1029
00:42:42,893 --> 00:42:44,037
I don't want to know anymore.

1030
00:42:44,061 --> 00:42:45,729
We were just two kids...

1031
00:42:45,813 --> 00:42:47,815
- Two...
- Two sixth graders?

1032
00:42:50,859 --> 00:42:51,944
Yeah...

1033
00:42:52,653 --> 00:42:54,113
- Just do it.
- There's...

1034
00:42:54,196 --> 00:42:55,030
Just do it.

1035
00:42:55,114 --> 00:42:56,740
Look him in the eyes and choose.

1036
00:42:56,824 --> 00:42:59,201
Me or him.
Just look him in the eyes and choose.

1037
00:43:00,703 --> 00:43:01,537
Hey!

1038
00:43:01,620 --> 00:43:03,706
Let me tell you something
before you choose, okay?

1039
00:43:05,583 --> 00:43:06,625
I...

1040
00:43:08,335 --> 00:43:09,837
I... I love you.

1041
00:43:10,546 --> 00:43:11,546
I love you.

1042
00:43:11,922 --> 00:43:14,425
I've... I've loved you since the moment
I saw you.

1043
00:43:14,675 --> 00:43:15,551
Remember?

1044
00:43:15,676 --> 00:43:16,676
Remember when we...

1045
00:43:16,760 --> 00:43:18,470
sharpened our crayons together?

1046
00:43:19,680 --> 00:43:21,599
- That was right after we had sex.
- Yes!

1047
00:43:22,516 --> 00:43:25,686
Nasty style! Real nasty style!

1048
00:43:27,062 --> 00:43:28,062
And I love you.

1049
00:43:28,272 --> 00:43:30,899
And I know he thinks he
knows what love is, but I...

1050
00:43:30,983 --> 00:43:33,110
have felt it since the moment I saw you.

1051
00:43:34,194 --> 00:43:36,363
And I'm telling you
that I saved your life that day.

1052
00:43:36,447 --> 00:43:39,050
So, if it's just some weird thing you have
because he saved your life,

1053
00:43:39,074 --> 00:43:40,159
let me tell you this.

1054
00:43:40,951 --> 00:43:41,951
I saved your life.

1055
00:43:43,662 --> 00:43:44,662
So, choose.

1056
00:43:46,332 --> 00:43:47,332
Choose.

1057
00:43:48,542 --> 00:43:49,542
Choose.

1058
00:43:50,044 --> 00:43:51,044
- Choose.
- Choose.

1059
00:43:51,086 --> 00:43:52,086
Choose.

1060
00:43:52,296 --> 00:43:53,339
Choose.

1061
00:43:54,173 --> 00:43:55,299
Choose.

1062
00:43:55,633 --> 00:43:57,217
- Choose.
- Choose.

1063
00:43:57,760 --> 00:43:59,887
My son's waiting. Choose!

1064
00:44:00,179 --> 00:44:03,974
<i>♪ - Darling choo-oo-oose
- Choose ♪</i>

1065
00:44:04,058 --> 00:44:06,101
<i>♪ Choo-choo-choose ♪</i>

1066
00:44:06,185 --> 00:44:07,436
Choose, sweetie.

1067
00:44:09,938 --> 00:44:10,938
Choose.

1068
00:44:14,985 --> 00:44:16,612
Choose.

1069
00:44:18,072 --> 00:44:19,073
Yes!

1070
00:44:22,242 --> 00:44:23,410
I mean, is there?

1071
00:44:24,244 --> 00:44:25,537
Is there any real way...

1072
00:44:26,246 --> 00:44:28,207
you could actually
prove that you did that?

1073
00:44:28,332 --> 00:44:29,458
That you were really saved…

1074
00:44:29,541 --> 00:44:31,394
or is this just another
figment of your imagination?

1075
00:44:31,418 --> 00:44:33,045
You were so creative as a sixth grader.

1076
00:44:33,754 --> 00:44:34,922
Is that what this is?

1077
00:44:35,839 --> 00:44:38,550
You want me to prove
that I actually murdered the guy?

1078
00:44:40,052 --> 00:44:41,845
Is there any way you could do that?

1079
00:44:42,054 --> 00:44:43,722
Uh...

1080
00:44:43,847 --> 00:44:45,516
I guess not.

1081
00:44:46,517 --> 00:44:47,517
Wait!

1082
00:44:48,727 --> 00:44:49,727
I can do it.

1083
00:44:58,153 --> 00:44:59,196
You!

1084
00:45:01,615 --> 00:45:03,117
I was the clown that day.

1085
00:45:05,035 --> 00:45:06,787
- That's why I'm a ghost.
- Oh!

1086
00:45:06,870 --> 00:45:08,914
That move worked perfectly.

1087
00:45:10,624 --> 00:45:11,624
You!

1088
00:45:12,000 --> 00:45:14,169
Yes, and I can tell you how it went down.

1089
00:45:14,586 --> 00:45:15,629
Huh...

1090
00:45:15,713 --> 00:45:18,716
I went to steal your... pearls

1091
00:45:18,799 --> 00:45:20,426
right in the alley after the opera.

1092
00:45:20,509 --> 00:45:23,512
I was like, "Why are two sixth graders
going to the opera?

1093
00:45:23,971 --> 00:45:25,472
This will be an easy steal."

1094
00:45:26,056 --> 00:45:27,056
Or, so I thought.

1095
00:45:27,099 --> 00:45:29,768
I snatch your pearls,
they go all over the place.

1096
00:45:29,852 --> 00:45:31,228
You... Dave...

1097
00:45:31,812 --> 00:45:33,147
You did nothing.

1098
00:45:34,148 --> 00:45:35,899
But you, Paul?

1099
00:45:37,735 --> 00:45:39,528
First of all, you look great tonight.

1100
00:45:40,154 --> 00:45:41,864
You look fantastic. But, Paul?

1101
00:45:44,324 --> 00:45:45,784
I know. I know.

1102
00:45:46,243 --> 00:45:47,661
Thank you. I look great too.

1103
00:45:48,120 --> 00:45:49,121
Say it again.

1104
00:45:50,122 --> 00:45:51,707
I can't hear you. Say it again.

1105
00:45:52,166 --> 00:45:53,166
Speak up!

1106
00:46:02,009 --> 00:46:03,427
You didn't try to save the day.

1107
00:46:04,052 --> 00:46:06,388
My gun fell, you slipped, you hit me,

1108
00:46:06,597 --> 00:46:07,765
and then you said...

1109
00:46:08,432 --> 00:46:09,516
Tell everyone.

1110
00:46:10,058 --> 00:46:11,101
Take the microphone.

1111
00:46:11,185 --> 00:46:12,185
Tell everyone.

1112
00:46:15,731 --> 00:46:16,940
Was it something cool?

1113
00:46:18,150 --> 00:46:20,027
I said, I said, "Whoopsie, doopsie."

1114
00:46:22,196 --> 00:46:24,072
You said, "Whoopsie, doopsie?"

1115
00:46:25,574 --> 00:46:27,284
Yeah, I said, "Whoopsie, doopsie."

1116
00:46:27,367 --> 00:46:28,410
So, you see...

1117
00:46:28,869 --> 00:46:29,995
it was an accident.

1118
00:46:30,954 --> 00:46:32,956
And I'm being pretty cool about it.

1119
00:46:34,041 --> 00:46:36,126
So, you're telling me...

1120
00:46:36,877 --> 00:46:39,296
that the gun just went in the air and...

1121
00:46:39,379 --> 00:46:40,631
it shot accidentally,

1122
00:46:40,714 --> 00:46:43,217
and no one pulled the trigger
other than it sort of falling,

1123
00:46:43,300 --> 00:46:44,694
- and it shot you?
- That's correct.

1124
00:46:44,718 --> 00:46:45,904
- And that's how you died?
- I'm telling you,

1125
00:46:45,928 --> 00:46:47,971
the only way you can
make your decision is love

1126
00:46:48,055 --> 00:46:49,181
and not consequence.

1127
00:46:49,848 --> 00:46:51,099
So, with that...

1128
00:46:51,642 --> 00:46:53,936
I'll still be the priest if you want.

1129
00:46:55,145 --> 00:46:56,897
Yeah. Stick around.

1130
00:46:57,189 --> 00:46:59,316
I think you're going to want to hear this.

1131
00:47:01,026 --> 00:47:02,110
Okay. Go.

1132
00:47:02,986 --> 00:47:03,987
Short Paul...

1133
00:47:04,863 --> 00:47:07,115
Um... you're a great guy.

1134
00:47:07,241 --> 00:47:08,241
Thanks.

1135
00:47:08,534 --> 00:47:12,371
Um... you treated me real... nice,
but real intense.

1136
00:47:13,622 --> 00:47:15,165
And I returned the favor.

1137
00:47:15,249 --> 00:47:17,435
- We had a great time in sixth grade.
- We had the best time.

1138
00:47:17,459 --> 00:47:18,794
Before you finish that sentence,

1139
00:47:18,877 --> 00:47:20,587
- we had the best time.
- But, Paul...

1140
00:47:21,129 --> 00:47:22,548
that was sixth grade.

1141
00:47:23,632 --> 00:47:25,634
I'm a woman now. A lady, even.

1142
00:47:27,928 --> 00:47:29,513
And I've found something else.

1143
00:47:30,389 --> 00:47:33,392
And I think you got to let the past
be the past, you know?

1144
00:47:35,435 --> 00:47:36,895
You wanna fuck one more time?

1145
00:47:38,438 --> 00:47:39,438
- No.
- Right.

1146
00:47:40,732 --> 00:47:41,732
No.

1147
00:47:42,568 --> 00:47:43,568
Lisa?

1148
00:47:46,572 --> 00:47:47,572
We cool?

1149
00:47:48,657 --> 00:47:49,657
No.

1150
00:47:52,119 --> 00:47:55,163
You... you fucking psychopath, no.

1151
00:47:57,541 --> 00:47:58,375
And you know what?

1152
00:47:58,458 --> 00:48:01,920
Corey, dude, you were
supposed to stop...

1153
00:48:03,088 --> 00:48:04,423
- Short Paul
- Fuck!

1154
00:48:04,506 --> 00:48:06,717
- if he was going to do anything crazy.
- Shit!

1155
00:48:06,842 --> 00:48:09,303
- I didn't do the one thing.
- You had one thing to do,

1156
00:48:09,428 --> 00:48:10,596
and you didn't do it.

1157
00:48:11,346 --> 00:48:13,181
Buddy, I got no other choice.

1158
00:48:13,682 --> 00:48:15,976
I've got to bump you
to the back of the line.

1159
00:48:18,645 --> 00:48:19,645
It was an honor.

1160
00:48:21,356 --> 00:48:22,232
Sebastian?

1161
00:48:22,316 --> 00:48:24,109
No, come on, man. Is this for real?

1162
00:48:24,943 --> 00:48:26,361
- You're my brother.
- Come on, man.

1163
00:48:26,445 --> 00:48:28,172
- Is this is for real?
- Of course, it's for real.

1164
00:48:28,196 --> 00:48:30,032
After we do our little thing here,

1165
00:48:30,115 --> 00:48:31,742
you want to do your routine?

1166
00:48:33,452 --> 00:48:34,578
My best man, speech?

1167
00:48:34,745 --> 00:48:36,997
- Can I stand right there?
- Of course you can.

1168
00:48:51,136 --> 00:48:53,180
Hey! I love you.

1169
00:48:53,555 --> 00:48:55,557
I love you too, baby, baby bro.

1170
00:48:59,144 --> 00:49:00,144
Do you?

1171
00:49:00,771 --> 00:49:02,022
Do you marry?

1172
00:49:02,105 --> 00:49:03,231
I do marry.

1173
00:49:04,316 --> 00:49:06,693
- Do you marry?
- I do marry.

1174
00:49:08,570 --> 00:49:09,570
Then...

1175
00:49:14,952 --> 00:49:15,953
Ah...

1176
00:49:19,831 --> 00:49:20,831
Then...

1177
00:49:22,834 --> 00:49:25,295
You've got to kiss each other.

1178
00:49:28,215 --> 00:49:29,215
Oh!

1179
00:49:40,519 --> 00:49:42,062
Alright.

1180
00:49:42,145 --> 00:49:44,690
Now, let's get down for the party.

1181
00:49:44,773 --> 00:49:46,984
I think my best man's
got something to say.

1182
00:49:47,734 --> 00:49:48,734
Yeah, that's right.

1183
00:49:48,777 --> 00:49:49,903
I've been preparing...

1184
00:49:52,823 --> 00:49:54,866
Everyone... sh... shut up.

1185
00:49:56,618 --> 00:49:57,618
My boy...

1186
00:49:58,078 --> 00:50:00,163
my second-born has something to say.

1187
00:50:00,706 --> 00:50:01,999
Grab the mic, baby.

1188
00:50:03,500 --> 00:50:05,836
What's up, motherfuckers?

1189
00:50:07,462 --> 00:50:09,798
I said what's up,
motherfuckers?

1190
00:50:13,218 --> 00:50:14,302
Yeah, give me a beat.

1191
00:50:14,386 --> 00:50:16,263
Give me a beat. Give me a beat.
Give me a beat.

1192
00:50:16,346 --> 00:50:17,597
Okay, that's good enough.

1193
00:50:18,807 --> 00:50:19,807
You know...

1194
00:50:24,229 --> 00:50:25,229
You know, Da...?

1195
00:50:26,064 --> 00:50:27,064
Dave?

1196
00:50:28,150 --> 00:50:29,150
Yeah.

1197
00:50:41,204 --> 00:50:42,706
I don't want to say a fancy speech.

1198
00:50:47,127 --> 00:50:48,962
Just want to say
I love you both very much.

1199
00:50:49,921 --> 00:50:52,716
And I can see why you guys
fit perfectly together.

1200
00:50:53,550 --> 00:50:54,550
I love you.

1201
00:50:55,260 --> 00:50:58,221
And I don't have to wish you luck
because I know you'll be alright.

1202
00:50:58,722 --> 00:51:00,932
I love you, and I love you.

1203
00:51:02,476 --> 00:51:03,518
Even me?

1204
00:51:05,854 --> 00:51:07,189
I love you too, ghost.

1205
00:51:08,106 --> 00:51:11,151
Oh! Oh! Whoa!
<i>Whoa!</i>

1206
00:51:12,569 --> 00:51:13,570
Uh!

1207
00:51:14,321 --> 00:51:15,405
That's all I needed.

1208
00:51:15,739 --> 00:51:17,407
That was my unfinished business.

1209
00:51:18,158 --> 00:51:20,660
No, somebody stop him. He's a robber.

1210
00:51:20,744 --> 00:51:23,080
- He's an actual robber.
- I'm going to Heaven.

1211
00:51:23,205 --> 00:51:24,831
- What the fuck?
- Fuck it.

1212
00:51:25,332 --> 00:51:26,666
That's our show!