What do you think is in that darkness?
I don't know, but it must be something bad,
otherwise why would I block it out of my memory?
We can try and figure it out.
Another attempt to get me to agree to hypnosis?
You can't blame a girl for trying, William.
When are you gonna start calling me Will?
When you call me Lydia.
You seem very pensive today.
I'm just tired.
A lot happening, the anniversary, yes?
Denise, two years?
Yeah.
How are the girls doing?
They're fine.
Have either of them said anything
about your wife's passing?
Why would they?
Well with your own mother passing,
it's a shared experience you all have.
I didn't lose my mother when I was a teenager.
But you lost your father, though when you were a kid.
I'm well aware of that.
I'm just surprised the topic hasn't come up.
I think it's more important that we move on with our lives
and leave the past where it belongs.
It's not my intention to agitate you.
See, I think it is if you think it'll help,
which it doesn't.
Ironically, I've actually had a dream
about my father the other night.
Really?
What were the circumstances?
Nothing really, he was just sort of there.
You lose your one parent and then you start dreaming
about the one that you barely knew
or that you hardly ever give a thought to.
I mean, up until a couple of weeks ago,
I had only had like a single picture of him
and I misplaced that years ago.
What happened a few weeks ago?
I came across some boxes of his stuff in my mother's attic.
What was in those, in those boxes?
I haven't had the time to bring them home yet.
You haven't had the time or you haven't made the time?
I figure if my mom put all that stuff away,
maybe she put that stuff away for a reason.
I mean, maybe she was trying to keep
something about my father from me for a reason.
Or maybe she didn't want to deal with you,
you know, asking questions about him,
wanting to know more about him.
Maybe she thought that would be too painful.
For me?
For her.
Have you ever considered that you might be teeing up
the same exact circumstances for your daughters?
The Soviet union announced
it will not participate in the Los Angeles summer Olympics
in retaliation for the American boycott
of the 1980 Moscow Olympics.
In national news, as the campaign for November heats up,
president Reagan said today-
- Just go ahead and set the boxes there.
There's one more.
Can you get it please?
Why can't Shanna get it?
Mindy.
Stuff must be old.
About 40 years.
Looks like a lot of junk.
I'm sure has some value to it
if Nana held on to it for that long, right?
I miss her.
Me too.
You know, she lived a long life, right?
Now, she's with your grandfather.
Yeah, she used to talk about him sometimes.
Grandpa Harold.
Gerald.
What?
My dad's name was Gerald, so it'd be Grandpa Gerald.
- Thank you. - Am I done now?
Yes, you're done now.
Good, I hate it down here, it smells so musty.
This is W-2-A-S-D.
Whiskey two Alpha Sierra Delta.
This is H-8-A-9-Q-R-L. How are you, Eva?
I feel like people are watching me.
I feel eyes on me all the time.
I just want to feel safe.
I'm doing the best I can here.
You're crazy, you know that?
I know.
Relax, nobody's watching you.
How do you know that?
You're just a normal American woman.
Who'd be watching you?
I don't know.
I just feel so alone.
So, go out, meet people, have a drink, dance.
You know I can't do that.
Copy that, then I can't help you.
Shit.
Breaker breaker. No, that's CB's.
Hello out there, anybody home?
Very Dangerous.
Hello, this is William.
Who's out there? I'm picking you up.
This is K-2-W-M-O. Can you hear me?
Careful! It's not what it seams.
Hello, I'm not making that out.
Hello?
Can you hear me?
What are you reading?
Protocols for using that radio downstairs.
You're gonna use that old thing?
Why not? Might be fun.
Get me in touch with my dad, maybe.
Maybe you can connect with him on the other side.
I don't think I could afford
that long distance bill, honey.
Who'd want to talk to dead people?
I think it'd be cool, don't you think?
Well, it'd certainly be interesting, that's for sure.
Okay.
Use QC as a general...
Let's give this a try.
Calling QC, is anybody on this frequency?
Calling QC.
This is W-2-A-S-D Whiskey two Alpha Sierra Delta.
Who is this? What's your call number?
Me? It's K-2-W-M-O.
Do you have a handle, K-2-W-M-O?
Traveling man? What's yours?
Melder girl.
It's nice to meet your Melder girl.
Whereabouts are you?
Why do you want to know that?
No reason really, just curious.
I'm really, really new at this.
So, I don't know how far away you can reach people.
You can reach people all over the world.
No shit.
New York.
I'm sorry, what?
I live in New York.
The city?
No, small town in New York state.
Hey, me too.
What are the odds, huh?
Well, you know, it is a big state,
lot of people live here.
So, what town do you live in?
I'd prefer not to say.
Okay. I mean, upstate, downstate?
Let's just say New York state
and leave it at that, shall we?
Okay.
Do you like baseball?
No.
Okay. This is why I don't date.
I'm sorry, I didn't catch that. Come again.
I said, is anything interesting going on
around where you are, wherever you happen to be living?
Nothing interesting ever happens to me around here.
Same day, same song, as they say.
See, now I know exactly where you are.
What do you mean by that?
You know what? You know where I live?
I was just kidding.
Sorry.
Don't worry, my daughters
don't get my sense of humor either.
So, you're married?
I was, she died a couple of years ago, leukemia.
Sorry to hear that.
So am I, how about you, are you married?
No.
Boyfriend?
Not anymore.
I'm sorry to hear that.
Well, I guess.
You know I'm like a lot of other women these days.
I mean, so many men have come and gone.
Tough love life, huh?
I prefer not to talk about this.
I'm sorry, I wasn't meaning to be nosy.
It's jake.
Did you just say it's jake?
Yeah.
God, I haven't heard that expression in years.
Well, jake, you know, it means it's okay,
everything's fine, like that.
No, I know what it means,
my grandfather used to use it all the time.
You actually sound familiar to me.
I wonder if we've met before.
I doubt that.
I'm gonna have to sign off now, Traveling man,
the boys here with the groceries.
Copy that, hopefully we'll find each other again.
That is so cool.
Grocery delivery, she lives in the city.
Who is it?
It's Billy.
Over there as usual please.
Mr. Krotter says he's all out of sugar,
but hopefully he'll get some in by maybe next week.
Oh well.
I guess that means no cookies for me.
Cookies!?
My ma hasn't baked anything sweet in such a long time.
Well, it's better for you.
What is it?
It's $2.40 today, ma'am.
There we go.
Thanks, miss Saints, see you next week.
God, I remember this.
"Sir William and I were playing catch this afternoon
until it got too dark to see.
Kids got a great arm."
I had a great arm.
Sir William.
God, I forgot all about that.
Point taken Dr. Jennings.
Dad, you down there?
Yeah.
The spaghetti sauce is burning.
Did you turn the burner off?
No.
Well, Mindy...
So, how was school today?
Boring as always.
That's because you don't have friends.
- I do too. - Girls.
I have a stupid history test tomorrow,
who cares about history?
On what?
World War II.
So stupid, it's 1984,
who cares about some dumb war anyways?
I don't think it was dumb for the people
that were living back then.
Were you in the war, dad?
No honey, I'm not that old.
I mean, I was alive back then,
but I was younger than the two of you.
Did he know anyone who died?
My two uncles, my dad's brothers, they were both killed.
How come your father didn't join the war?
He had a problem with the hearing in one of his ears.
Bet he was glad to get out of it.
I don't think so.
I think he was really upset that he couldn't go.
Why?
Things were different back then.
A lot of people were very patriotic during the war.
It was America all the way.
Bet they'd feel different
if they had to read about it all the time.
I started going through my father's stuff
and one of the things is his old ham radio.
And I plugged it in and it still works.
But...
But what?
None of that stuff is really stirring things up
like I hoped it would.
Like for instance, I came across
this old checkered handkerchief
that he used to carry around all the time.
And I remembered that he used to
tie it around my face sometimes like an outlaw's mask.
So, I'm picking up a thing or two here and there
but I don't remember, remember.
You know, that darkness is still there.
You know, the mind is a complicated, tricky thing.
That's why it's so important that we try different things
because we never know what's going to stick.
And I know you think I'm pitching hypnosis here,
but I'm not, all right.
I actually think it's pretty important
that you go through your father's belongings
on a number of levels.
It actually might bring you out of this darkness.
It's just so irritating.
I know something happened, but I can't just assume
that it has anything to do with my father's death.
That could be a complete coincidence.
If you believe in coincidences, which I don't.
"Well, I was at the hardware store,
a woman came in, never saw her before.
Told Chubby she had just moved to town.
I tried to introduce myself
but she gave me the greasy eye.
Not my type, still there was something about her.
Looked like the sort of dame
that might enjoy a good tumble."
The things you don't want to know about your dad.
William!
Hello, who's out there?
Hello?
This is W-2-A-S-D Whiskey two Alpha Sierra Delta.
Traveling man, are you on the air?
Traveling man?
This is Traveling man, Melder girl?
Copy.
Didn't have much to do today,
so, I thought I'd reach out.
I'm here.
Can I ask you a question?
Shoot.
I'm sorry, come again.
Yeah, go ahead and ask your question.
So, why Traveling man? Are you a salesman or something?
No, I'm a post-harvest consultant
and it takes me overseas a lot.
What's post-harvest?
It's an agriculture term.
Basically, I show people how to store their crops
after they harvest them so that they get
as much longevity out of them as possible before they spoil.
Sounds like it's very important.
In some regions of the world
It's the difference between living and starving to death.
It's very important.
You sound very passionate about it.
Well, I grew up on a farm
and I used to work in a grocery store.
So, I guess you could say foods been a big part of my life.
So, you still have the farm?
No, my mom sold that a long time ago,
after I left school and decided
I wanted to become a professor.
Professor, huh? Very impressive.
Oh, it is very, very impressive.
Especially if you love red tape and ass kissing,
which I don't like either one.
So, that's why I left teaching and went into consulting.
I think it makes more of an impact anyway.
And you know, I get to do a lot of traveling.
Hence the handle Traveling man. Okay, I got it.
So, what about you? What do you do for a living?
Nothing anymore, I inherited some money.
Life of leisure, huh?
Not really.
Do you travel at all?
Used to, not much anymore.
Have you ever been to Europe?
Why do you want to know that?
No reason, just curious.
Yes, I've been to Europe.
I just got back, I was there a couple of weeks ago.
I think it'd break my heart to see it now.
I thought it was amazing.
I mean, just absolutely beautiful.
Especially if you're into the history of it.
Where did you go?
I was in London for a few days
and then went on to France and Germany.
What do they look like now?
What do they look like? I don't know.
Like America, I guess, except different.
I wasn't there working-working,
those countries don't need my expertise.
We were actually there for a conference concerning Zimbabwe.
Dad, you down there?
I gotta be a Danny's in 10 minutes.
All right, I'll be right up.
Melder girl, my kids are calling me
so, I've got to go, you have a great afternoon.
Like America.
I doubt that.
I thought you guys didn't like it down here.
So, why aren't you sleeping well?
I just had the dream about my father still being alive.
That's reoccurring?
It's actually expanding.
Not married, don't have kids.
It's just the two of us working my family's old farm.
Interesting.
And it's not disjointed like dreams usually are though.
It's very common, very day-to-day feel.
In some ways it's reminiscent
of that darkness we've been talking about
in the sense that I feel it more than I actually see it,
but it's still very real.
But it isn't, and it certainly shouldn't be keeping you
from a full night's rest.
Dreams are a way for our minds
to work out our problems and our anxieties.
They shouldn't be adding to them.
Let me know if this keeps up
and I'll prescribe something for you.
Okay.
Are you on the airway Melder girl?
Melder girl, are you there?
Melder girl?
This is Melder girl, Is this Traveling man?
Hey, I didn't know if I'd catch you today.
You caught me, what you doing?
Not a whole lot, just did some running around.
Got some time to kill before I have to put dinner on.
What is that noise that I keep hearing?
What noise?
It's like jingling or metal or something like that.
Oh, it's 50 cent pieces.
I carry a lot of change around with me, it's an old habit
and sometimes I wind up playing with them
and don't even realize I'm doing it.
Does it annoy you?
Yes.
Sorry.
So, anything new with you?
Nothing ever changes where I am.
Oh, come on. Things change all the time.
Not to me they don't, I don't leave my house.
Never?
Never.
Why's that?
I have a condition, it's extreme nervousness.
Every time I go outside, my heart starts to race.
I break into a sweat, I just feel like I'm gonna die.
Well, that sounds like agoraphobia.
What's that?
You've never heard of agoraphobia before?
No.
It's a psychological disorder.
Well, my doctor said it was extreme nervousness.
Well, what did your doctor prescribe?
Rest.
Rest, is that it?
There's medications that could help you
with this Melder girl.
Well, that wasn't mentioned.
I'd get a second opinion.
A shrink could certainly help you.
Did you say shrink?
Yeah.
I don't understand.
Like what, I'm supposed to be smaller?
Smaller? No.
Seeing a psychiatrist doesn't make you
any less of a person, Melder girl.
What does a psychiatrist have to do with this?
That's what we're talking about, a psychiatrist.
You should see one to help you
with being scared to leave your house.
Well thank you, no.
But I don't think I would enjoy electroshock very much.
Electroshock? They don't do that anymore.
Lots of people see psychiatrists, Melder girl.
I'm even seeing one right now.
Why? What's wrong with you?
I had a traumatic experience when I was young.
What happened?
I don't remember.
Well then how do you know it was traumatic
If you can't remember?
That is a fantastic question.
And I'm currently spending $40 an hour trying to answer it.
$40 An hour?
I think I know what's causing your trauma.
H-8-A-9-Q-R-L. Are you there?
How are you, Eva?
Han, where have you been? I've been trying to contact you.
Been hot here.
Are you still in Panama?
Affirmative. Be moving soon.
Why?
Got some people to meet.
I wish I could come.
I've always wanted to see South America.
You're better there.
I suppose so.
This nervousness is really getting to me.
Relax, Eva.
How's your project going there?
It's been very successful.
Good.
Han, do you think we'll ever meet?
No. Signing off.
K-2-W-M-O.
K-2-W-M-O, Traveling man.
Are you on the air?
This is traveling man, Melder girl?
Yeah.
How are you doing today?
Actually, I'm tired.
Late night, huh?
No, I'm bored.
It's exhausting to have nothing to do all day.
Saps your brain cells and your body.
Well, what do you do all day
if you don't ever leave your house?
I don't know, I cook, I read books and magazines,
I do puzzles, listen to the radio.
That sounds lonely.
Do you at least have cable?
Cable? What, like overseas cables?
No, like TV cable.
What is that?
You really have been secluded, haven't you?
I mean, how long have you had this condition,
this nervousness of yours?
I don't know, I guess it's been bad
for the last couple of months,
but really started about a year ago
when I came back to America.
Where were you before that?
I was living overseas, circumstances changed.
My mother died, probably from shame
that her daughter didn't live up to her expectations.
But anyway, came back and now I'm living in their house.
Her hous? So, your dad's past as well?
Yeah, it's probably the right thing
to come back to America.
But it was scary.
I mean, I felt like everybody was watching me
and judging me because I'd been living in Germany.
And I just felt hostility everywhere from everybody.
No, I doubt that was the case.
That's probably a lot of that's in your head.
Maybe, but after a while I just went out less and less.
I mean, when I went out, I just felt like I was gonna...
I was having a heart attack
and I would just feel enveloped by panic, it was awful.
God, that's terrible.
Yeah it was.
Is.
So, you lived in Germany?
Yes.
For how long?
Couple of years.
Like I told you, I just got back.
Did you get to see any of the sites while you lived there?
Sites?
Yeah, well, I mean, we were in Munich,
but I'm not really into cities
so this professor friend and I,
we went around and we did the castles, the famous castles.
And there was one in particular,
I'm sure I'm butchering that, but...
It's Neuschwanstein.
That's it.
That place was amazing, I mean right out of sleeping beauty.
You know, just real fairytale stuff.
Oh, I know. I see it every morning.
How's that?
I have a picture of it on my wall.
Well, I'm gonna sign off now, I think.
I'm really in desperate need of a cup of Joe.
Yeah, talk later.
William.
This is K-2-W-M-O, who's out there? Over.
Who is this? Over.
Melder girl, was that you?
Melder girl, are you there?
This is weird.
What kind of voices?
It's hard to describe, but it's like echoey, incoherent.
Voices coming out of a radio, who would've thought that?
You don't have to be an ass about it.
I know how it sounds.
It's just not the kind of, what you would expect to hear
coming out of a radio.
Couldn't it just be people talking
and you're hearing bits and pieces,
fragments of their conversations?
It's more familiar than that.
I mean, I've literally heard my name more than once.
Your actual name?
Well, you know, that's actually an auditory memory.
Especially if it's happening
when you're in a hypnagogic state.
Hypnagogic.
Yeah, well that's that time,
you know, between waking reality and sleep.
But I'm not in bed.
I'm not nodding off or anything, I'm perfectly awake.
Yeah, well, you know, a hypnagogic state,
it's very common and it doesn't have to be
at that time specifically.
They've actually done studies on it.
You know, some people think
there's a metaphysical component to that,
but I don't buy into that.
Just like you don't buy into coincidences.
You know, the mind's already shrouded in enough mystery
without taking on anything paranormal or supernatural.
I bet you're a lot of fun at story time
around the campfire.
What's that?
Some of your mom's things.
I thought we could go through them.
I thought you said-
- I know what I said,
and I think it was wrong and I'm sorry about that.
Come on, let's take a look.
Doesn't it make you sad?
Yeah, it does, a little, but it's important.
Why?
Because family's important.
I mean I lost my dad when I was about your age
and I didn't have a sense of him as a person
because Nana didn't like to talk about him after he died.
Why not?
I don't know, honey.
I'm sure she had a reason.
But not talking about him was very hard for me.
And I don't want the same thing for the two of you.
I don't want you to ever lose the image of your mom.
I want you to always remember her
and always be able to keep that memory close.
I mean none of this is really that valuable,
but she'd want you to have it.
Are those pictures?
Mm-hmm.
And they're from when she was younger.
You look like her.
You look just like her in this one.
You actually both have her looks.
You also have some of her mannerisms.
The way you say certain things.
I see her in both of you every day.
Can I keep this one?
You can keep all of it.
Everything in this box belongs to both of you now.
Melder girl, this is Traveling man.
Melder girl?
I'm here. I also think I'm a little drunk.
I don't think I'm too far behind you.
So, you drinking because you're happy
or drowning your problems?
The last one.
I've been there.
I'll tell you, the devil's hard to drown.
I know I've been spending a lot of my days trying.
You know, the problem with being alone
is you just have all these thoughts
and you just, you don't have anybody to work them out with.
So, they just sit there and go round and round in your head
like some kind of crazy Ferris wheel.
Well, I'm here right now. You can talk to me.
I don't know you.
That's what makes it perfect.
I mean, who better than a stranger to tell your problems to?
Maybe.
So, what's troubling you this evening,
Melder girl?
The past.
Just doesn't want to let go of me.
I guess a lot of people could say something like that.
I know my past's been haunting me for years.
Why? What happened to you?
I told you, I don't know.
How can something you don't know haunt you?
'Cause I feel it, even if I can't remember it.
Then how do you know it's bad?
That's what my shrink and I are trying to figure out.
Your what?
I told you I'm seeing this psychiatrist.
Oh yeah, yeah, that's right. I remember.
I don't know, Traveling man.
I think I'd like to trade with you.
I'd like to forget my past.
I don't recommend it.
So, what are you trying to forget?
Broken heart?
It's part of it.
Probably not like you think though.
Can I ask you a personal question?
Depends. What is it?
What's your name? Like your real name?
Why do you want to know that?
'Cause Melder girl's starting to sound like,
"Hey you" or "To whom it may concern".
It's Eva. What's yours?
My name's William.
Some people call me Will.
Most of them are gone now.
You sound a little bit drunk yourself, Will.
Either that or very sad.
The last one.
I was actually pretty close
to my mother growing up, you know?
But all that ended when I lived abroad.
She didn't approve of my attachments.
She just stopped talking to me, you know.
She wouldn't answer my letters or my telegrams.
My mom and I were always close.
Of course, my dad died when I was a kid, so it made sense
that we were sort of clinging to each other.
I am sorry to hear about your mom though.
Yeah, me too.
But I don't regret my decisions.
So, I want to ask you another personal question.
It'll help me put a better mental picture of you in my mind.
It's jake, go ahead.
How old are you?
That is personal.
I know better, but I'm drunk, so...
Let's just say I'm old enough.
That is a fantastic age.
God.
We've been doing this all night.
I know, it's been Saturday for a couple of hours now.
You must be tired.
I am.
Who is it?
It's Billy.
Will, I gotta go now,
the kids here with the groceries, I'm gonna sign off.
Okay, talk to you later.
Put it over there.
It's $2.10 today, ma'am.
Here.
What's wrong?
I forgot to bring change.
How can you deliver groceries without change?
You should always have change on you.
Tell Mr. Krotter that he can have his ten cents next time.
when his delivery boy does his job right.
But he'll take it out of my wages.
Price of an education, now beat it.
God.
Don't get caught up, William.
It's not what it seems.
Live on the wrong side of the world.
Hello? Who is this?
I think you're bleeding into my frequency.
What's your call number?
I found it.
Auditory memory my ass.
So, shouldn't I be laying on a couch or something?
Would that make you more comfortable?
No.
Okay then.
All right, so how do we do this?
Well, I'm just gonna talk you into a state of relaxation
and we'll go from there.
All right, I want you to close your eyes.
All right, and I want you to take some slow deep breaths.
Now, can you think of a place that's peaceful and safe?
You're at that place and your whole body feels light.
You're at peace.
There's no pain, no sorrow, just peace.
Now, keeping that safety and that peace.
I want you to go back in time,
back to the day your memory was lost.
Start early in that day. What were you doing?
Helping dad with the tractor.
Is everything okay between the two of you?
Yes, but he seems upset about something.
He tries to hide the fact that he's upset.
Did he say anything out of the ordinary?
No, but I can tell.
What do you do next?
I'm going to my job at the store.
Then what?
I don't want to.
It's okay.
I don't know.
It's okay, just take a deep breath.
Why don't you just go back to your safe place now.
It's okay.
One more thing I suck at.
We'll get there.
So, last time we talked you were a little down.
I was drunk.
Are you feeling better?
Yeah, you know, it's actually really nice
to have somebody to talk to for a change.
God, you say that like I'm your only option,
which for your sake I hope is not the case.
Am I becoming a burden to you, Will?
Just the opposite.
I'm sure I'm only moderately jake at best.
No, you're fine company.
Seriously though, I mean, you don't have anybody else
you can talk to like friends, neighbor?
Something more than just my stupid voice
coming out of a little box.
I do have a friend of sorts.
What's she like?
It's a he.
Oh.
And we don't do a lot of talking.
None of my business.
You don't have to snap your cap, Will.
I mean it's not serious or anything, he's married.
That's right, I'm one of those women.
Will, are you still there?
I mean look, I'm not some crazy man-eater or something.
It's just, you know, one of those things.
It's not my place to judge.
No, it's not, but you asked.
Yeah, sometimes I'm not very smart.
Most men aren't.
Are we still friends?
Yes, we're still friends.
I'm glad. I'm gonna sign off now.
It's not your time.
This is W-2-A-S-D, Whiskey two Alpha Sierra Delta.
This is H-8-A-9-Q-R-L,
Hotel eight Alpha nine Quebec Romeo Lima.
I'm close to having everything all together.
How do you want me to send it?
Just use the normal signal when it's ready.
I'll send someone within a few days after to pick it up.
So, what's all this?
We're making picture boards.
You take the clothes pin and put it on the board
and put pictures of mom on it like this.
Then you hang it on the wall.
We're making one for each of us, including you.
That's okay, isn't it?
It's jake.
Jake?
He's weird.
Yeah, Denise was great.
And she took care of everything too,
the house, the girls, me.
You must miss her a lot.
You have no idea, I mean, she was everything to me
and it was amazing how in sync we were.
I mean, I'd start a sentence, she'd finish it.
She always knew what I was thinking.
And she had this way of singing things,
things that you and I would normally say.
Like what?
Well, you know, like mundane stuff
like "The laundry needs to be folded"
or "I'm starving, why don't you take me to dinner?"
Actually, it was kind of annoying but,
I'd give anything to hear her do it again.
Well, maybe she did that to get a reaction out of you.
Women like to keep men on their toes you know?
Oh, she was good at that.
Every time I turned around, she was redecorating the house,
paint, curtains, knick-knacks, you name it.
So, it made it that much harder when she died.
I just couldn't look around
anywhere in this place and not see her.
So, I wound up packing it all up.
Didn't really talk about her much with the girls.
I was kind of a shit father actually.
I wasn't very fair to them at all.
Well look, you said that they're teenagers.
I mean, come on, they're old enough to know how you feel.
Maybe, but it still wasn't fair.
So, I pulled everything back out, gave it to them.
It's not easy looking at it but,
I don't want them to forget her.
I'm sure that they won't.
You're lucky, you have those things
and you have your daughters.
When I lost Gerde...
Who's Gerde?
He was my fiance.
You were engaged?
Yeah.
Well what happened?
He was killed.
God, I'm sorry about that.
Yeah, me too.
You remember that castle that you went to? Neuschwanstein.
It's where I met him.
You're kidding.
No, he worked there for a while.
God, he was a wonderful man.
You know, a lot of people said
that I was too old to get married.
Past my prime and you know,
no man would ever look at me that way.
But he was different, he saw past the wrapping.
He saw me for who I really am.
When did he die?
Right before I came back to America.
So, that's why you came back?
It's one of the reasons.
Again, I'm really sorry.
Yeah, me too.
And all I have left of him
is a framed photograph, that's it.
So, every day I talk to it,
I tell him how much I still love him.
How much I still miss him.
But now you have a new man, right?
Is that what you are?
I was talking about the guy that you told me about,
the married guy.
Nobody's perfect.
You know what, I'm tired, It's late.
I think I'm gonna sign off.
Hey, if I hit a nerve there, I'm sorry.
I really didn't mean anything by it.
It's okay, I really am tired though.
Good night, Eva.
Good night, Will.
You're late.
I knew you'd be up.
Did anybody see you?
No.
Do you have something for me?
You wouldn't be here if I didn't.
Don't!
No!
So, what happened to him?
I'm not sure of all the details but...
Actually he got shot.
You're Kidding me.
No, I'm not. Apparently he went to the wrong house,
thought he was calling on some guy
that wanted to buy a piece of farm equipment.
Guy told him he'd be out back working on something
and to go on in.
My father entered and the woman who actually lived there,
mistook him for a robber and shot him.
My God, that's really horrible.
It must've been very hard for you.
Well, actually I was pretty close
to the scene of the accident when it happened.
I was running errands for my boss
and I fell off my bike or something,
hit my head, blacked out.
I don't remember any of it,
just the little bit my mother told me.
What happened to the woman who shot him?
You know, I have no idea.
And like I said, my mother never really talked about it
and by the time I got old enough to look into it myself,
I figured nothing's gonna bring him back,
so why bother digging it all up again?
Poor woman.
My mother or the woman who shot my father?
Both.
Are you in your safe place, William?
Yes.
Now let's go back to that day.
You're on the farm with your father working on the tractor?
Yes.
What's his demeanor?
He's upset about something,
but he tries to hide it from me.
What happens next?
I finished my morning chores,
then I go to my job at the grocery store.
So, you're at the grocers, what happens next?
I stock some shelves and I sweep the floor,
then my boss tells me I need to make a delivery.
Pack the groceries in a box and strap it to my bike
and then I ride to the house.
I get there and...
It's okay.
It's all right, you know what,
this all happened a long time ago.
You were just an observer.
Now, watch this as if it was a television show.
Just tell me what happened next.
I get to the house
and then I pick up the groceries
and I walk to the basement hatch.
Do you always deliver there?
Yes.
Why?
I don't know.
It's just what she wants me to do.
What do you do next?
I go down the stairs and knock on the door.
Who answers the door?
I don't see her,
she says to set the groceries down.
What do you see now?
Looking at the calendar on the wall.
What does it say?
June, 1946.
There's a picture right next to the calendar on the wall.
It's familiar.
It's a castle.
There's a man.
It's a picture of a man.
William.
What did you see?
Nothing, nothing.
Just, you know...
To see something from so long ago, so vividly.
It's okay, just take slow, deep breaths.
What did you see?
I can't do this anymore.
We can do this next time.
Are you okay?
Think, you can remember this.
Where was that house?
Think William, think.
You had to go across that bridge.
It was that little house in Ludlowville.
If Eva's the same woman,
no wonder she didn't want to tell you how old she is.
Yes?
Is Eva here?
Who?
Eva, I think she lives here.
There's no Eva here,
I've lived here for 15 years, never has been.
Sorry.
Will, are you there?
Will, are you on the air? Over.
I'm here, Eva.
Hey, what's buzzin' cousin?
Sounds like you are.
Been hitting the booze again?
Actually, yeah. Well only a little bit.
I just finished a bit of a project.
So, I'm celebrating a little bit.
How about you, what are you doing today?
Eva, that picture that you were telling me about
on your wall, the one at the castle.
Yeah?
How long have you had that?
A little over a year.
I had a friend send it to me from Germany after the war.
The war.
You mean the second World War?
Well, yeah, what else would I be referring to?
You drinking a little early yourself, Will?
How is this possible?
Will, are you still there?
Eva.
Yeah?
What's the name of the kid that delivers your groceries?
Why do you want to know that?
What's his name?
Billy.
Eva, what year is it?
1946. You have been drinking.
Will, you still there?
I've gotta go.
She's in the past.
How is this happening?
This isn't happening.
Look's like they hit a wreck out-
She was a big one.
That skirt was so high!
You knew there'd be a problem-
That dame would...
William.
Who is this? What do you want?
You can't trust her.
You're breaking up.
My journal.
QC, this is K-2-W-M-O, who is this?
K-2-W-M-O.
Yes, this is K-2-W-M-O! You've reached K-2-W-M-O!
K-2-W-M-O?
Yes, this...
I'm K-2-W-M-O! Who is this?!
K-2-W-M-O.
Read my journal.
William, my journal.
K-2-W-M-O, my journal.
Dad?
Billy.
Master William.
"Today I was headed for Joe's when I saw her again,
she was just leaving the drug store.
She saw me looking at her and she gave me that chilly look.
She walked away without looking back.
I've been keeping an eye out for that dame,
I know I shouldn't,
but there's something mysterious about her.
Haven't seen her though.
I was in Ludlowville this morning and saw her again.
She was setting her milk bottle out for the milkman.
She looked up at me this time.
I fancy she might've smiled a little,
I guess I'm a sinner after all.
I've been with her four times now,
I know what's wrong, but I can't help it.
She's gotten under my skin somehow.
I don't know why, she's not a young woman.
I can't let Margaret find out.
I've still got her and Billy to think of,
this would not bode well in Sir William's kingdom."
God, dad.
June 11th?
You gotta be kidding me.
"I've never been so fucking furious in my life.
I thought I was falling in love and with what?
A lying bitch.
She sure put one over on me, on all of us.
She's a fucking..."
What did you just ask me?
What's his name?
That's none of your damn business.
It's important.
No, it's not.
I need to know, Eva.
Well then you are destined to be disappointed.
All right, fine, then tell me this.
Have the two of you been fighting recently?
Again, none of your damn business.
You have, haven't you?
'Cause his name's Gerald, isn't it?
His name is Gerald.
I'm right, aren't I?
How do you know these things?
How do I know what, that his name's Gerald
or that you're a Nazi?
'Cause you are, aren't you? You're a Nazi!
Eva, I'm right, aren't I?!
Don't call me again.
Eva!
Eva! You're a Nazi, aren't you, Eva?!
Eva!
Fuck!
Dr. Jennings, this is William.
I need to see you as soon as possible.
I need to finish this.
Han, I've been signaling,
you aren't answering me.
I'm really vulnerable right now, somebody knows.
I still have all of this stuff.
Han, please pick up. Do you copy?
I have everything ready here, nobody's picked anything up.
This is so important, you have to get back to me.
Han, goddammit! Where are you?!
Let's go back through that day.
What happens next?
She opens the basement door and I go inside.
What do you see?
Just stuff, a calendar,
a picture on the wall,
a picture of a guy,
a gun like my uncle used to own,
a clock.
Do either of you say anything?
I tell her that the bill is 3.19.
She pays me the money.
I start to leave.
What is it, William?
I hear something.
What do you hear?
Shouting. It's a man.
I'm scared.
Why are you scared?
I can hear them moving, she might need help.
I keep hearing them shouting.
Can you make out what they're saying?
Not all of it, but I keep hearing a man's voice.
What then?
The gun...
- What about the gun? - It's gone.
I hear the voice again.
"You bitch, how could you?!"
Can you tell who the voice belongs to?
It's my father.
Remember William, you're safe.
You're just observing. What do you see next?
I'm upstairs.
The woman and my dad, they're arguing.
She has a gun.
And then?
What's happening now?
I'm running away from the house
through the woods.
I just keep running and running and running and then...
Darkness.
Nothing but darkness.
I can't speak or move, but I hear them talking.
They asked me questions but I can't remember.
My mother tells them to leave me alone.
My father's dead, it was a terrible accident.
She can't afford to lose me as well.
I'm just a kid.
I suffered enough.
Will, you're safe, you're here with me.
You saw something terrible,
but now we know what the darkness is covering up.
It's okay. It's okay.
Now we can work on fixing it.
Fix?
We can fix it.
My father died on June 12th, 1946, June 12th.
38 Years ago, today.
Did you realize that when you set this appointment?
Anniversaries can be important milestones in therapy.
You said coincidences.
I don't believe in them, I still don't.
Everything happens in its proper time and place.
Time.
William!
I can still stop it.
The clock in her bunker said 5:07.
There's still time.
Eva?
Eva, I know you're there.
I don't know who you are, but you need to stop.
I know who you are, you stay away from Gerald.
Don't you ever contact me again, do you understand me?
Are you listening to me, Eva?
Nazi bitch!
You leave Gerald alone, do you hear me?
Billy.
Hi, Miss Saints.
Yeah, this just really isn't the time.
Do you hear me, you bitch?
Just doing routine.
- Just put it down - Don't you dare touch him.
Don't you dare touch him.
Bitch, where are you?
Just get out, Billy.
Is that my dad?
Get out.
Eva, I know you can hear me.
But the money.
Dammit, Eva you stay away from Gerald, do you hear me?
You stay away from Gerald.
Answer me!
Eva, you answer me!
Pick up, Eva!
Are you listening?
Eva, you pick up.
Hello?
Do you live here?
Who is this?
Because I need my $3.19.
Billy?
How do you know my name?
That doesn't matter right now.
Is that woman's still there?
No, she ran out when that guy upstairs started yelling.
You said she ran out?
Yeah, before she paid me.
Billy, listen to me. Is the gun still there?
It would be to your right over on the shelf.
Yeah.
Billy, I want you to listen to me very carefully.
I'm a friend of your father's, your dad is in trouble.
He's in danger, Billy. That woman is going to hurt him.
Billy, I know you.
I know you know how to use that gun.
Dad.
Billy.
Son, put the gun down.
Listen to me, put the gun down.
- No, he's a little shit. - No!
Billy!
That's the third time this season,
he's lost his footing out there.
Of course, in my state I can't just go out
and drag him back to the house.
And that's when I came to the sad realization
that my dad and I had been working that farm together
for so many years.
He's in his late 70's,
so he's bound to slow down at some point.
Guess it was just inevitable
that we were gonna have to start thinking about
bringing somebody else on
and I can keep doing what I'm doing.
I can't run the whole farm by myself.
Well, that's understandable.
How's it going outside of the business though?
How about with your personal life?
Everything's fine I guess.
Been having a hard time sleeping lately.
Headaches again?
There's always the headaches, right?
I mean, they can patch you up
after getting shot in the head,
but they can't get rid of a goddamn headache.
No, what's keeping me up is a dream.
Tell me about it.
I'm married in it, but my wife's not there.
You know, dreams can get weird
like when you're outside,
but you're inside at the same time, you know what I mean?
But I have kids, two daughters.
I swear I can see their faces, I can hear their voices.
It's just so real.
Sometimes the things that we deeply desire,
they can show up in our sleeping minds.
It doesn't feel made up though.
It's just too familiar.
Something to delve into next time, perhaps?
Sounds good.
Well, it's all the time we have for today.
She's kicking me out.
Not at all.
You be safe, Will.
You too, Lydia.
William.
I need you to wake up now, sleepy-head
time to get up.
It's not your time.
Hello?