1
00:00:00,834 --> 00:00:01,768
- Mom?
- Maggie?

2
00:00:01,768 --> 00:00:02,769
- Dorothy?
- Max?

3
00:00:02,769 --> 00:00:03,770
- Dorothy?
- Patrick?

4
00:00:03,770 --> 00:00:04,671
- Drag queen!
(chimes ringing)

5
00:00:04,671 --> 00:00:05,606
- Mom!
- Maggie!

6
00:00:05,606 --> 00:00:06,607
- Dorothy.
- Max.

7
00:00:06,607 --> 00:00:08,475
- Dorothy?
- Patrick.

8
00:00:08,475 --> 00:00:12,779
- I took way too much acid.
(electronic music)

9
00:00:12,779 --> 00:00:14,681
(whimsical music)

10
00:00:14,681 --> 00:00:16,283
- [Announcer] Womb Envy.

11
00:00:16,283 --> 00:00:17,751
- Mom, what are you doing?

12
00:00:17,751 --> 00:00:20,454
- Him, and, and him.

13
00:00:20,454 --> 00:00:23,023
(Dorothy stammers)
Don't touch me, sinner.

14
00:00:23,023 --> 00:00:25,859
Have I covered my
transgressions like Adam?

15
00:00:27,127 --> 00:00:29,830
Like hiding my
inequalities in my boobs.

16
00:00:29,830 --> 00:00:31,932
No, inequities in bosom.

17
00:00:31,932 --> 00:00:33,300
Inequities in my bosom.

18
00:00:33,300 --> 00:00:35,702
- Is she speaking in tongues?
(sound whooshing)

19
00:00:35,702 --> 00:00:37,437
(chimes ringing)
- Mm, Google translate says

20
00:00:37,437 --> 00:00:39,172
she's speaking in drunk.

21
00:00:39,172 --> 00:00:40,974
- I'm not drunk.

22
00:00:40,974 --> 00:00:42,943
- Oh my G- God.

23
00:00:42,943 --> 00:00:46,346
Can she see me when
she's as drunk as I am?

24
00:00:46,346 --> 00:00:51,318
- Whoever conceals their sins
shall not something, prosper.

25
00:00:52,886 --> 00:00:54,655
And I forget the rest.

26
00:00:54,655 --> 00:00:55,522
- You're drunk.

27
00:00:55,522 --> 00:00:57,357
- Oh no. (laughs)

28
00:00:57,357 --> 00:00:58,892
She's wasted.

29
00:00:58,892 --> 00:01:03,330
- I went to a meeting to
get some god damn support.

30
00:01:03,330 --> 00:01:06,166
Lord knows I don't
get anywhere else.

31
00:01:06,166 --> 00:01:11,171
And I find Max giving a speech
about how I'm an alcoholic,

32
00:01:12,572 --> 00:01:16,510
and how you deceived me,
and made a fool outta me.

33
00:01:16,510 --> 00:01:19,212
- Dorothy, I am so sorry you
had to find out that way.

34
00:01:19,212 --> 00:01:21,481
- You're a living blasphemy.

35
00:01:21,481 --> 00:01:23,183
- Mom, stop.

36
00:01:23,183 --> 00:01:24,985
- And you are a liar.

37
00:01:24,985 --> 00:01:26,753
- I was gonna tell you
everything tonight.

38
00:01:26,753 --> 00:01:29,189
- You were never engaged.

39
00:01:29,189 --> 00:01:33,393
Your baby was always going
be born out of wedlock.

40
00:01:33,393 --> 00:01:35,095
- Yes, and?

41
00:01:35,095 --> 00:01:38,699
- Ah, I told you the improv
training would pay off, um...

42
00:01:38,699 --> 00:01:40,867
- And I look like an idiot.

43
00:01:42,903 --> 00:01:45,339
What am I gonna tell
my church group?

44
00:01:45,339 --> 00:01:47,507
- Dorothy, I understand
how you're feeling.

45
00:01:47,507 --> 00:01:49,543
- Why are you here? (laughs)

46
00:01:49,543 --> 00:01:51,211
'Cause you're boning the man

47
00:01:51,211 --> 00:01:53,380
that was supposed to be
my daughter's fiance?

48
00:01:53,380 --> 00:01:56,350
This, ah, this is
the gay agenda.

49
00:01:56,350 --> 00:01:58,552
I saw it on Fox News.

50
00:01:58,552 --> 00:02:01,188
- I am the one that lied.

51
00:02:01,188 --> 00:02:02,522
They didn't.

52
00:02:02,522 --> 00:02:05,025
Patrick didn't know,
Max was just kind enough

53
00:02:05,025 --> 00:02:06,693
to help me out.

54
00:02:06,693 --> 00:02:09,062
- If not for them, then why?

55
00:02:09,062 --> 00:02:10,897
- Because I'm scared of you.

56
00:02:13,967 --> 00:02:16,770
- You're scared of me? (scoffs)

57
00:02:16,770 --> 00:02:18,271
What's there to be scared of?

58
00:02:19,573 --> 00:02:22,876
- Because I don't want a
family with the father.

59
00:02:22,876 --> 00:02:26,113
And I didn't think that
you would agree with that.

60
00:02:26,113 --> 00:02:28,148
- A child needs a father.

61
00:02:28,148 --> 00:02:29,583
Oh.
- Dorothy, let me help you.

62
00:02:29,583 --> 00:02:31,485
- I don't need any help.

63
00:02:31,485 --> 00:02:33,620
We're not staying
here another minute.

64
00:02:33,620 --> 00:02:35,756
- This is a safe
place for Maggie.

65
00:02:35,756 --> 00:02:39,259
- We're going home, and
finding the real father,

66
00:02:39,259 --> 00:02:40,093
and that's it.

67
00:02:40,093 --> 00:02:42,262
- No.
- No?

68
00:02:42,262 --> 00:02:45,599
- No, I'm staying here with Max.

69
00:02:45,599 --> 00:02:48,268
- You can't stay here
and bring a child here.

70
00:02:48,268 --> 00:02:50,604
He's, he's a sinner.

71
00:02:50,604 --> 00:02:52,239
- And so am I.

72
00:02:52,239 --> 00:02:53,940
And so are you.

73
00:02:53,940 --> 00:02:57,911
And no amount of repenting
is going to change that.

74
00:02:57,911 --> 00:02:59,279
- You need me.

75
00:02:59,279 --> 00:03:01,248
I, God showed me.

76
00:03:01,248 --> 00:03:04,584
- You showed me how
not to be a mother.

77
00:03:04,584 --> 00:03:06,953
This child needs to be welcomed

78
00:03:06,953 --> 00:03:10,157
by a happy, independent person.

79
00:03:10,157 --> 00:03:12,592
And reconnecting
with Max reminded me

80
00:03:12,592 --> 00:03:14,594
that I used to be that person.

81
00:03:15,796 --> 00:03:19,466
And you, you used
to be this person,

82
00:03:20,834 --> 00:03:23,870
which is exactly who I was
afraid of you becoming again.

83
00:03:23,870 --> 00:03:27,974
But I am not
sacrificing my happiness

84
00:03:27,974 --> 00:03:32,813
or my child's happiness to
keep you from being this.

85
00:03:32,813 --> 00:03:36,183
- I wanted to give your
baby what I never gave you.

86
00:03:36,183 --> 00:03:38,385
- My baby is not
your second chance.

87
00:03:38,385 --> 00:03:42,622
- It's too difficult to
raise a child alone, Maggie.

88
00:03:42,622 --> 00:03:44,224
Tell me, what is his name?

89
00:03:44,224 --> 00:03:46,893
- It's not important.
(exhales sharply)

90
00:03:46,893 --> 00:03:49,663
- Why?
- Because it doesn't matter.

91
00:03:49,663 --> 00:03:50,530
It was just a hookup.

92
00:03:50,530 --> 00:03:51,998
- That's my girl.

93
00:03:51,998 --> 00:03:54,000
- I will make him
take responsibility.

94
00:03:54,000 --> 00:03:55,836
He can't just walk
away from this.

95
00:03:55,836 --> 00:03:57,471
- He doesn't know.

96
00:03:57,471 --> 00:03:59,339
- Then I'll call
him up right now.

97
00:03:59,339 --> 00:04:00,841
Who is it?

98
00:04:00,841 --> 00:04:03,076
- Right now we need to think
what's best for Maggie.

99
00:04:03,076 --> 00:04:05,712
Dorothy, I also came
to know God through AA.

100
00:04:05,712 --> 00:04:07,647
- Faggots can't know God.

101
00:04:07,647 --> 00:04:08,648
- Dorothy.

102
00:04:08,648 --> 00:04:10,984
- Absolutely not, we're done.

103
00:04:10,984 --> 00:04:13,487
- Get out.

104
00:04:13,487 --> 00:04:15,589
(alcohol sloshing)

105
00:04:15,589 --> 00:04:17,858
- Not until you tell
me who the father is.

106
00:04:17,858 --> 00:04:20,427
- Dorothy, let's regroup
tomorrow when you're not...

107
00:04:21,328 --> 00:04:23,029
I'll order you an Uber?

108
00:04:23,029 --> 00:04:25,699
- I'm not going anywhere
till I find out who it is.

109
00:04:25,699 --> 00:04:27,033
- I don't even know.

110
00:04:27,033 --> 00:04:31,238
- You've just been
blindly helping Maggie?

111
00:04:31,238 --> 00:04:32,506
Sorry, Patrick.

112
00:04:32,506 --> 00:04:34,274
- That's what she
apologizes for?

113
00:04:34,274 --> 00:04:37,878
- Dorothy, you need to leave.

114
00:04:37,878 --> 00:04:40,213
Go back to your Airbnb.

115
00:04:40,213 --> 00:04:42,516
- I didn't rent one. (laughs)

116
00:04:42,516 --> 00:04:43,950
- What?

117
00:04:43,950 --> 00:04:46,887
- I figured I could guilt you
into letting me stay here.

118
00:04:48,054 --> 00:04:51,291
That didn't work out
too well. (laughs)

119
00:04:51,291 --> 00:04:54,561
So, I'm driving
back to Elliot Lake.

120
00:04:55,962 --> 00:04:57,964
- You are not driving.

121
00:04:57,964 --> 00:04:59,199
- I'm fine.

122
00:04:59,199 --> 00:05:01,434
- Don't let the door
hit you on your way out.

123
00:05:01,434 --> 00:05:04,471
And don't hit a lamppost
on your way out either.

124
00:05:04,471 --> 00:05:06,606
- Dorothy, give me your keys.

125
00:05:06,606 --> 00:05:08,909
- I pray for this child.

126
00:05:09,876 --> 00:05:10,744
- Jesse.

127
00:05:12,379 --> 00:05:13,446
- Jesse.

128
00:05:14,981 --> 00:05:17,551
The Zamboni guy?

129
00:05:17,551 --> 00:05:20,153
I have his mother's number,
I'll call her right now.

130
00:05:20,153 --> 00:05:21,755
- Don't you dare

131
00:05:21,755 --> 00:05:22,589
- Jesse.

132
00:05:25,091 --> 00:05:28,094
Captain of the hockey team?

133
00:05:28,094 --> 00:05:32,566
Prom king, the guy I literally
had nightmares about.

134
00:05:32,566 --> 00:05:34,601
You wanted me to
raise his child?

135
00:05:37,337 --> 00:05:38,772
When were you gonna tell me?

136
00:05:40,273 --> 00:05:42,509
- I mean, yes.

137
00:05:42,509 --> 00:05:45,679
I, I was, um...

138
00:05:45,679 --> 00:05:46,780
I just didn't want...

139
00:05:46,780 --> 00:05:48,081
- Maggie, are you, are you okay?

140
00:05:48,081 --> 00:05:49,282
- I couldn't...

141
00:05:49,282 --> 00:05:51,351
(Maggie groans)

142
00:05:51,351 --> 00:05:52,485
- Maggie?

143
00:05:52,485 --> 00:05:53,520
- Pumpkin?

144
00:05:53,520 --> 00:05:56,022
(water splashes)

145
00:05:56,022 --> 00:05:57,624
- Did you just piss yourselves?

146
00:05:57,624 --> 00:05:59,626
- Did we both just
piss ourselves?

147
00:05:59,626 --> 00:06:01,127
(Maggie groaning)
- They're going into labor.

148
00:06:01,127 --> 00:06:03,196
- I did not sign up for this.

149
00:06:03,196 --> 00:06:04,431
(excited music)
(sirens wailing)

150
00:06:04,431 --> 00:06:06,433
- Dear Lord, deliver
this baby into the world

151
00:06:06,433 --> 00:06:09,836
clean of any briars that
inflicted upon its soul.

152
00:06:09,836 --> 00:06:11,204
- Oh mom, this is not helping.

153
00:06:11,204 --> 00:06:12,372
- Keep pushing, Maggie.

154
00:06:12,372 --> 00:06:14,107
The doctor's on his way.

155
00:06:14,107 --> 00:06:15,609
(Max groaning)

156
00:06:15,609 --> 00:06:16,776
- Keep pushing, Max!

157
00:06:16,776 --> 00:06:18,311
I don't know what you're
pushing, but push.

158
00:06:18,311 --> 00:06:19,779
(Max screaming)

159
00:06:19,779 --> 00:06:20,981
- Just give me a knife,
and I'll cut it out myself.

160
00:06:20,981 --> 00:06:22,349
- Remember your breathing.

161
00:06:22,349 --> 00:06:24,451
- Just breathe out your sins.

162
00:06:24,451 --> 00:06:26,186
And breathe in is glory.

163
00:06:26,186 --> 00:06:28,955
- Enough with the Bible bull!

164
00:06:28,955 --> 00:06:30,523
- Shit!

165
00:06:30,523 --> 00:06:31,992
(Maggie screaming)
- Ah, I'm giving birth

166
00:06:31,992 --> 00:06:35,629
to Godzilla, I can
feel his pointy spikes!

167
00:06:35,629 --> 00:06:38,298
(Max screaming)

168
00:06:39,366 --> 00:06:41,501
- Holy shit, I
think it's crowning.

169
00:06:41,501 --> 00:06:43,970
(Maggie groaning)

170
00:06:43,970 --> 00:06:47,407
(Max screaming)
(Maggie groaning)

171
00:06:47,407 --> 00:06:49,042
(Max breathing heavily)

172
00:06:49,042 --> 00:06:50,543
This is insane!

173
00:06:50,543 --> 00:06:53,580
(Maggie groaning)
(Max screaming)

174
00:06:53,580 --> 00:06:55,382
(substance squirting)

175
00:06:55,382 --> 00:06:56,383
- Oh, is that shit?

176
00:06:56,383 --> 00:06:58,351
Am I shitting, on you?

177
00:06:58,351 --> 00:07:00,153
(Patrick wincing)

178
00:07:00,153 --> 00:07:03,590
(baby crying)
(Maggie breathing heavily)

179
00:07:03,590 --> 00:07:07,527
- Oh my good eye.
(Patrick gagging)

180
00:07:10,764 --> 00:07:15,769
(Maggie sighs)
(monitor beeping)

181
00:07:17,704 --> 00:07:19,939
- Mom, where's the baby?

182
00:07:19,939 --> 00:07:21,341
- He came a bit early.

183
00:07:21,341 --> 00:07:22,742
He's just resting.

184
00:07:22,742 --> 00:07:24,210
You both had a long day.

185
00:07:25,278 --> 00:07:26,780
- How is he?

186
00:07:26,780 --> 00:07:30,684
- Oh, he's healthy, and
he's a gift to the world.

187
00:07:32,886 --> 00:07:34,020
Just like his mother.

188
00:07:41,728 --> 00:07:44,964
Last night I made a big mistake.

189
00:07:46,299 --> 00:07:48,068
I am so sorry,

190
00:07:50,070 --> 00:07:51,871
but I am here for you.

191
00:07:55,241 --> 00:07:58,078
- So, you're okay
with everything?

192
00:07:59,045 --> 00:08:00,613
- Of course, I'm your mother.

193
00:08:02,048 --> 00:08:02,816
We're fine.

194
00:08:03,917 --> 00:08:04,918
We're perfect.

195
00:08:10,290 --> 00:08:12,759
- Have you talked
to Max, where is he?

196
00:08:12,759 --> 00:08:14,661
- Don't worry about Max,
don't worry about Max.

197
00:08:14,661 --> 00:08:15,929
Just rest.

198
00:08:17,297 --> 00:08:20,233
(Maggie sighing)

199
00:08:20,233 --> 00:08:24,137
- Yeah, I need to close
my eyes for a minute.

200
00:08:28,575 --> 00:08:33,580
- I'm here.

201
00:08:34,147 --> 00:08:36,282
(phone buzzing)

202
00:08:42,756 --> 00:08:46,359
(phone chiming)
(Maggie snoring)

203
00:08:46,359 --> 00:08:48,795
- [Max] Maggie, you won't
believe what happened to me,

204
00:08:48,795 --> 00:08:50,964
what I heard happened to me.

205
00:08:50,964 --> 00:08:52,966
How are you, how's the baby?

206
00:08:52,966 --> 00:08:54,000
What floor are you on?

207
00:08:54,000 --> 00:08:55,301
Give me a call.

208
00:08:55,301 --> 00:08:56,703
- [Automated Voice]
End of new messages.

209
00:08:56,703 --> 00:08:59,005
To delete this
message, press seven.

210
00:09:01,975 --> 00:09:04,644
(phone chiming)

211
00:09:06,112 --> 00:09:08,381
- Oopsy. (sighs)

212
00:09:08,381 --> 00:09:11,518
(monitor beeping continues)

213
00:09:11,518 --> 00:09:14,454
(electronic music)

214
00:09:19,025 --> 00:09:21,127
♪ Max power, I'm about
to go bigger and better ♪

215
00:09:21,127 --> 00:09:22,829
♪ If I ever lose sight, I
know I'm faster than ever ♪

216
00:09:22,829 --> 00:09:25,165
- [Announcer] Womb Envy
is created by Champagna,

217
00:09:25,165 --> 00:09:27,901
written by Mark Keller,
produced by Charlie David,

218
00:09:27,901 --> 00:09:29,402
directed by Jake Horowitz,

219
00:09:29,402 --> 00:09:31,704
with cinematography
by Paul Maxwell.

220
00:09:31,704 --> 00:09:33,506
Womb Envy is produced
and distributed

221
00:09:33,506 --> 00:09:35,041
by Border2Border Entertainment,

222
00:09:35,041 --> 00:09:38,578
in association with
AMI, and Out TV.

223
00:09:38,578 --> 00:09:41,047
Integrated described
video by AMI,

224
00:09:41,047 --> 00:09:44,017
featuring Daniel
Fernandes, Storm Steenson,

225
00:09:44,017 --> 00:09:48,221
Jeffrey Haase, Helen Holtham,
Champagna, and Luke Avoledo.

226
00:09:48,221 --> 00:09:49,522
♪ Because I'm too much

227
00:09:49,522 --> 00:09:51,057
♪ But you gotta go,
'cause I gotta go ♪

228
00:09:51,057 --> 00:09:52,859
♪ Let it drive on full power

229
00:09:52,859 --> 00:09:54,694
♪ Never hit the
brakes, no comma ♪

230
00:09:54,694 --> 00:09:56,696
♪ I gotta go, I gotta get

231
00:09:56,696 --> 00:09:59,165
♪ I'm on the way to
get the full power. ♪

232
00:09:59,165 --> 00:10:02,702
♪ I love the game, first
place MDB I say GT ♪

233
00:10:02,702 --> 00:10:04,237
♪ And even if you
still don't get it ♪

234
00:10:04,237 --> 00:10:06,706
♪ Just wait I'm
about to go like ♪

235
00:10:06,706 --> 00:10:09,542
- [Announcer] Copyright 2023
Border2Border Entertainment.

236
00:10:09,542 --> 00:10:14,214
(whale splashing)
(crickets chirping)