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Subtitles by explosiveskull
www.OpenSubtitles.org
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The instant high that
you get from when, you know,
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10,000 people are laughing
their heads off.
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What's your brain doing?
What are your neuro transmitters doing?
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The human brain is, you know, an
extraordinary three and a half pound gland,
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that is like quantum... it's quantum
neurology, it's quantum physiology,
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that the moment you think
you understand that it,
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it comes up
with something else.
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Because I don't have an act per se,
but more a cesspool of consciousness,
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just, you know, ideas.
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Moments when I'll be on a roll or
something will happen that I'll fire off,
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and you can't have... it's like being
possessed. It's like channeling.
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When it works it's great,
and when it doesn't, it's painful.
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But when it's working,
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it's that, it's that weird
thing about you're surfing,
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and kind of like you're in, you
know, that thing athletes describe it
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as the same thing
of being, "Oh, it's working."
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My name
is Susan Schneider Williams,
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my husband Robin Williams...
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Two sentences, Leonard.
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It all happens in two sentences.
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We had unknowingly
been battling a deadly disease.
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A disease for which
there is no cure.
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Robin's... The devastation on
Robin's brain from Lewy Bodies
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was one of the worst cases medical
professionals have ever seen.
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Yet throughout all of this,
his heart remained strong.
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Unchosen path.
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When Robin started acting
out of character,
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nearly every region of his brain
was under attack by Lewy Bodies.
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Can you imagine the pain he felt as
he experienced himself disintegrating,
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and not from something he would
ever know the name of or understand.
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So, um,
I hate to have to report this.
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The breaking news
just in to CNN
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is that actor Robin Williams
is dead at the age of 63.
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We have just received
word from the West Coast.
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Tragic, devastating word.
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Robin Williams has been
confirmed dead.
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They believe that the Bay
area resident committed suicide.
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We do know
that at 11:55 this morning,
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Marin County communications
received a 911 telephone call,
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reporting that a male adult
had been located unconscious,
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and not breathing
inside his residence,
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in unincorporated
Tiburon, California.
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I felt... tremendous remorse,
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and guilt that, "Gosh, I could have
done more. I should have done more."
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I know that something
must've been terribly wrong
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for someone as brilliant as Robin to
just, you know, jump ship like that.
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In the immediate
aftermath of Robin's death,
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the confusion and information
was constantly changing.
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Robin Williams'
battle with addiction
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and mental illness
was no secret.
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Before the coroner's report
came out,
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there was a lot
of media speculation.
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People who are
assuming the worst,
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that he's broke, or he's
depressed, or is just given up.
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The highs are highs
and the lows are lows,
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and there's nothing sadder than
when a comedian is by himself.
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They painted him
as the sad clown.
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Those close to Williams
believe he had bipolar disorder.
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They thought
he just committed suicide
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for something related to
unhappiness, drugs or depression.
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And of course,
none of that is true.
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...on Robin Williams'
mind before his death, money.
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- While it may seem strange...
- People fill in the blanks,
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um, so a lot of that
was going on.
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That last evening
I spent with him, he was...
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he was completely sober
and not on drugs,
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but just most, uh, troubled
by what he was going through.
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I think it's important
that the truth comes out
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because there were so many affirmative
things that Robin stood for,
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and we want to believe
in all of them.
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We want to believe in him.
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And there's a danger that his suicide
could occasion people to think,
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"Oh, well he wasn't
what we thought he was.
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"We didn't know him
after all."
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Um, but we did.
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I felt like I was somehow
being loyal to him
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by not speaking about
the struggles that we saw.
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I think we felt that wasn't
anyone's business.
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And so the story is one of
Robin being at the mercy
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of something
that you could not control.
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And even worse than not being able to
control it, not even knowing about it.
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It was not till October,
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I was called in to sit down to
go over the coroner's report.
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There were no surprises about
what was in his toxicology,
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I knew my honey
was clean and sober.
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They sat me down and said,
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"Essentially Robin died
of diffuse Lewy Body Dementia."
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"What is that?"
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They started to talk about
the neuro degeneration.
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He wasn't in his right mind.
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He described how these
were these Lewy Bodies
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that were in nearly
every region of his brain.
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It makes sense why he was
experiencing what he was experiencing.
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Cognitive moods, movement,
they were all affected.
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Depression, a fear,
anxiety, hallucinations,
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delusional thinking, major sleep
disorders, insomnia, paranoia.
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I remember walking out
of that facility,
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down the steps outside
and feeling,
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"Now I have the name of it."
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It was the beginning of understanding
what had really gone on.
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I was talking to someone
I'd met at UCSF,
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and she said, "Send me the last
two years of the medical records,
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"I'll get them to Dr. Miller and
I know he'll be happy to see you."
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Lewy Body Dementia
is a devastating illness.
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It's a killer. It is fast.
It's progressive.
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I'm looking at how Robin's brain
had been affected.
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I realized that this was
about as devastating form
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of Lewy Body Dementia
as I had ever seen.
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Almost no area
was left unaffected.
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It really amazed me that Robin
could walk or move at all.
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The disease is devastating,
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but even more so
when you realize that
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Robin did not have
a diagnosis.
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He did not know where these
new symptoms were coming from.
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The disease becomes
progressively irreversible,
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unstoppable, uh,
and always fatal, always fatal.
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But cures, we're far away
from those.
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It affects many people and sadly
one of the outcomes is suicide.
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If we'd had the accurate
diagnosis of Lewy Body Dementia,
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that alone would have
given him...
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some peace.
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His soul thrived here.
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He grew up here.
His roots were here.
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I mean, he... he started
in Detroit,
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but he went to school here
in Redwood.
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Robin could live anywhere he wanted
and chose to live in a neighborhood.
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Living in Marin,
which is kind of like, you know,
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north of San Francisco
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it's like, it's the idea of, "This is it.
I don't need to live...
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"I can't. I mean, I don't do well in LA,
if I was living in a gated community."
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And he said, "I want to live
with people. I love people."
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He liked Marin, it's a wonderful,
beautiful place to live.
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He would ride his bikes
every day.
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You ran into him
walking his dog outside
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and you're like, "Oh,
he's a totally normal guy."
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You know, really not that different,
people walking dogs, saying hello.
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He's just trying
to be normal.
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But then on the flip side,
like, he's lived a crazy life.
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You would never know
he was a superstar.
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The Throckmorton
Theatre in Mill Valley
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started doing the Tuesday
Night comedy nights.
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It was just comedy.
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Yet it exploded and partly because
Robin Williams lived down the street.
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So all of a sudden,
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you've got an open mic
more or less on Tuesday
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that's drawing 250 people,
on Tuesday. Every Tuesday.
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The audience would go crazy.
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And Robin would come up
after I already had a show,
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and we would do another
two hours of improv.
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And this would happen
all the time.
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And he literally would just
get up at the end of the night,
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and he would just
crush it with no content.
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Nothing got him off as much as
being in front of a live audience,
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and getting to just free float
and let his brain take him
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where he's going
and react with the audience.
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If someone throws
something in from there,
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or just take what he's saying
and do 300 rifts on that.
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His mind was just so fast.
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Look out there,
there's a little kid out there.
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I saw a three-year-old kid who
could barely use a fork or spoon.
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He's eating, he's eating
blueberries with his hands,
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and all of a sudden someone handed him
an iPhone, he was like...
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When you're playing
with Robin Williams,
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you're not known for how
you neck and neck with him.
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You're not known
for how you beat him.
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You're known for how you
just barely keep up with him.
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Look up here Rick, there's people on the Hills.
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Hi, everybody on the Hills.
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Screaming on the mount.
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- Did Jesus have comedy day?
- Jesus had comedy day.
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I'll be back.
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There'd be improvs
where I'm on stage with Robin,
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and we would sync up,
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and to see that in his eyes,
that twinkle that means we made it.
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It's impossible to describe genius
or comedy really. You can analyze it.
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But I went with him to two days of Aladdin
recording sessions on the Disney lot,
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and watching him
go back and forth,
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and do all of these characters.
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Let's blow this popsicle stand!
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A doorstop
would be a fabulous career.
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Not bad, goodnight, Alex.
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Out of all of every pore
of his being,
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and he was so happy
and joyous.
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Hey. Go get him here, you little crazy guy.
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I don't care
what I am, I'm free.
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Offer void or prohibited by law.
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He goes, "Let's do that again,
I could do that better."
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And they go, "What do you mean
you can do it better?"
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He goes, "No, just let me, just run it
again. I think I have an idea, you know."
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"You think you have an
idea, good Lord. Oh my God."
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I think the man has to flow.
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He has to be able to come in
there and go against the magic.
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He's got his own magic, and he just
hasn't found it in himself yet.
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Unnecessary use of reptile,
500 year penalty.
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Watching these technicians
desperately laughing and crying,
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trying to keep up with him
and not screw up the dials
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while they're witnessing
true brilliance.
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Enough about you. Talk about her.
She's a honey.
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Come on.
Talk about the features.
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Her hair, her eyes, her shoes,
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bee-guiling, bee-witching,
bee-utiful.
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When you're in the room
with Robin, it is full go.
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- Um, thank you.
- Not at all.
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Theodore Roosevelt, 26th president
of these United States of America,
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00:13:12,389 --> 00:13:13,591
at your service.
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00:13:13,624 --> 00:13:17,028
He was a constant spark,
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comedic spark, idea spark,
throwing in lines,
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improvising a ton.
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Some of the biggest laughs are things
that Robin invented on the fly.
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I remember many, many days where Ben
Stiller and I would look at each other
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because we're just watching Robin Williams
off the top of his head just go off.
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And that kind of manic,
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wildly creative,
bottomless pit of ideas.
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Um, that mojo, that ability,
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which was like a superpower.
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I'd never seen anything like it.
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Let go.
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The thing to know about
the brain is that it's not static.
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The connections
are always changing.
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We call it neuroplasticity.
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So you have someone
who has a stroke,
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a part of the brain is damaged,
it's not coming back.
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Some of those patients
get completely better
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because the brain rewires,
it has this resilience.
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00:14:12,316 --> 00:14:15,519
And the determinants of resilience,
we don't quite understand.
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But high intellectual abilities
to begin with,
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seem to go along
with that kind of resilience.
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People who have
great brains,
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who are incredibly brilliant,
can tolerate degenerative diseases
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better than someone
who is average.
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The concept of reserve,
Robin Williams was a genius.
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Robin was brilliant,
he just knew things.
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But besides that, his...
his extrasensory perception
235
00:14:50,555 --> 00:14:53,291
of life and of people
and of me,
236
00:14:53,324 --> 00:14:55,227
he was a master at that.
237
00:15:01,398 --> 00:15:04,068
You could track it back
to two years before he left.
238
00:15:06,104 --> 00:15:08,239
We'd go to the Throckmorton
all the time.
239
00:15:08,273 --> 00:15:10,408
He always had
an open invitation to go on.
240
00:15:10,441 --> 00:15:12,744
And what started to happen
at around two years
241
00:15:12,777 --> 00:15:17,449
is he started to feel, um,
like he didn't want to go on.
242
00:15:19,216 --> 00:15:21,552
He just wasn't as eager
243
00:15:21,585 --> 00:15:25,190
to, uh, meet with people
backstage,
244
00:15:25,223 --> 00:15:27,225
or hang out too long
in the green room.
245
00:15:27,258 --> 00:15:31,662
It was getting a little bit
briefer and he didn't, um,
246
00:15:31,696 --> 00:15:37,335
he just... there were more insecurities
cropping up for him about going onstage.
247
00:15:37,368 --> 00:15:40,472
There were a couple of shows where
I was expecting Robin to be there,
248
00:15:40,504 --> 00:15:43,408
and he didn't make it
for one reason or another.
249
00:15:45,442 --> 00:15:48,479
So that... that confidence
that he had,
250
00:15:48,513 --> 00:15:52,350
and the ability
to go on and play...
251
00:15:52,383 --> 00:15:55,821
He just wasn't willing to go there as
much anymore, it was starting to lessen.
252
00:15:55,854 --> 00:15:58,757
That was concerning.
Something's off.
253
00:16:02,627 --> 00:16:05,430
Someone is seemingly performing
254
00:16:05,463 --> 00:16:08,633
just as they had, you know,
for years and years,
255
00:16:08,666 --> 00:16:11,503
and then all of a sudden there's
some very strange thing that happens,
256
00:16:11,536 --> 00:16:14,773
uh, and that raises concern,
257
00:16:14,806 --> 00:16:16,740
but then the next day
they're okay again.
258
00:16:16,773 --> 00:16:21,345
And then over time those dips
become deeper and deeper,
259
00:16:21,378 --> 00:16:25,683
and we have these fluctuations,
especially in the beginning.
260
00:16:25,716 --> 00:16:29,253
The last thing they probably think of is
that it's a degenerative brain disease.
261
00:16:32,624 --> 00:16:37,162
After that, things were...
just, life was busy, you know.
262
00:16:37,195 --> 00:16:40,331
He was working so hard
on The Crazy Ones at that time,
263
00:16:40,364 --> 00:16:42,734
and it was getting
more and more difficult for him
264
00:16:42,767 --> 00:16:44,102
to remember his lines,
265
00:16:44,134 --> 00:16:47,471
and he was getting more and more
insecure about his performance.
266
00:16:47,504 --> 00:16:49,072
Mark!
267
00:16:49,106 --> 00:16:51,809
I know that he was
sometimes having trouble with his lines,
268
00:16:51,843 --> 00:16:53,277
and stuff up front,
269
00:16:53,311 --> 00:16:58,150
but he was really always able to
power through and be that guy.
270
00:16:58,182 --> 00:16:59,884
And once you hit editorial,
271
00:16:59,917 --> 00:17:04,523
you'd find the Robin Williams that
you know and love was always there.
272
00:17:04,555 --> 00:17:07,458
I proposed we redo
that 1972 spot,
273
00:17:07,492 --> 00:17:09,360
and take a chance
of making people feel.
274
00:17:09,394 --> 00:17:12,797
For my projects, we... we really
stick to the script,
275
00:17:12,830 --> 00:17:15,900
but when you have
Robin Williams,
276
00:17:15,934 --> 00:17:19,937
it would be folly not to let
him do whatever he wants to do.
277
00:17:19,971 --> 00:17:21,573
- And take.
- Boss.
278
00:17:21,606 --> 00:17:23,808
Secret sauce.
279
00:17:23,840 --> 00:17:25,944
♪ Drive through lovin'
280
00:17:25,976 --> 00:17:27,711
♪ Drive Drive through lovin' ♪
281
00:17:27,744 --> 00:17:29,548
Booty shake, booty shake,
booty shake, booty shake.
282
00:17:29,580 --> 00:17:31,349
You didn't give me
enough ketchup...
283
00:17:31,381 --> 00:17:33,851
- Packets.
- Oh, my God.
284
00:17:33,885 --> 00:17:35,520
So every take
would be different.
285
00:17:35,552 --> 00:17:38,223
Uh, ad libs
and these comic nuggets
286
00:17:38,255 --> 00:17:41,692
would come from Mars
or somewhere in Robin's head.
287
00:17:41,725 --> 00:17:45,263
But a lot of them were gold.
288
00:17:45,295 --> 00:17:48,566
So, I think that he was
maybe a little slower out of the gate,
289
00:17:48,600 --> 00:17:50,334
but he finished strong.
290
00:17:50,368 --> 00:17:52,503
He'd managed to, kind of,
power through it.
291
00:17:52,536 --> 00:17:55,306
He'd get up
and he'd become this guy
292
00:17:55,340 --> 00:17:57,576
that you knew,
remembered and loved.
293
00:17:57,609 --> 00:17:59,878
- Can you be serious?
- Well, maybe for a second.
294
00:17:59,910 --> 00:18:02,446
No, see... Sorry.
295
00:18:02,480 --> 00:18:04,916
It's not easy
to do a network television show,
296
00:18:04,948 --> 00:18:07,418
on top of that
he had Night at the Museum,
297
00:18:07,452 --> 00:18:10,755
and you know,
he's, he's doing double duty.
298
00:18:10,788 --> 00:18:12,991
The third movie,
the last movie,
299
00:18:13,023 --> 00:18:15,793
I would say, a month
into the shoot,
300
00:18:15,827 --> 00:18:19,330
it was clear to me, it was clear
to all of us on that set
301
00:18:19,363 --> 00:18:22,466
that something was going on
with Robin.
302
00:18:22,500 --> 00:18:25,737
That's an experience
that I've not spoken about,
303
00:18:25,770 --> 00:18:30,275
um, publicly ever.
304
00:18:30,308 --> 00:18:35,647
We saw that Robin was struggling
in a way that he hadn't before.
305
00:18:35,679 --> 00:18:38,850
To remember lines,
and to combine
306
00:18:38,882 --> 00:18:41,852
the right words
with the performance.
307
00:18:41,886 --> 00:18:45,290
You know, when Robin would call me at
ten at night, at two in the morning,
308
00:18:45,322 --> 00:18:47,725
at four in the morning saying,
309
00:18:47,759 --> 00:18:51,896
"Is it usable? Is any of this usable?
Do I suck? What's going on?"
310
00:18:51,928 --> 00:18:54,265
I would reassure him.
311
00:18:54,299 --> 00:18:56,901
And so I said,
"You are still you.
312
00:18:56,934 --> 00:19:01,505
"I know it, the world knows it.
You just need to remember that."
313
00:19:02,506 --> 00:19:04,475
My faith in him never left.
314
00:19:04,509 --> 00:19:08,046
But I saw
his morale crumbling.
315
00:19:08,079 --> 00:19:13,585
I saw a guy who wasn't himself and
he thought that was unforgivable.
316
00:19:16,353 --> 00:19:19,290
Lewy Body Dementia
is particularly tragic
317
00:19:19,323 --> 00:19:22,494
in the way that
it increases anxiety,
318
00:19:22,526 --> 00:19:25,929
increases self-doubt,
causes delusions,
319
00:19:25,963 --> 00:19:29,501
misbeliefs that have never been
present in someone.
320
00:19:29,533 --> 00:19:31,936
And imagine how hard
that is for someone
321
00:19:31,968 --> 00:19:34,672
who doesn't even realize
that they're suffering
322
00:19:34,705 --> 00:19:36,675
from a degenerative disease,
323
00:19:36,707 --> 00:19:39,410
something that is slowly
taking away
324
00:19:39,444 --> 00:19:41,812
the function of neurons
across the brain.
325
00:19:46,583 --> 00:19:48,419
I think the thing
that made Robin most special
326
00:19:48,453 --> 00:19:51,489
about this spectrum
of abilities he had,
327
00:19:51,522 --> 00:19:53,792
was the solid guy
in the middle.
328
00:19:53,824 --> 00:19:55,426
That's who you are in the middle
of all that other stuff.
329
00:19:55,459 --> 00:19:56,927
These things come and go,
who are you?
330
00:19:57,328 --> 00:19:58,664
Do you stay you?
331
00:19:59,763 --> 00:20:01,532
You know, what will you become?
332
00:20:05,770 --> 00:20:08,874
We met on the day
he arrived in New York City.
333
00:20:11,676 --> 00:20:16,648
I remember really he was different.
I could see the beginnings.
334
00:20:16,680 --> 00:20:20,351
Robin and Christopher Reeve
came into my third year class
335
00:20:20,385 --> 00:20:22,686
at Julliard
as advanced students.
336
00:20:22,719 --> 00:20:25,823
Christopher was my roommate
and Robin became very quickly,
337
00:20:25,857 --> 00:20:28,059
my very best friend
that I ever had.
338
00:20:28,091 --> 00:20:31,428
Yeah, we're hippies from space
and he's an Ivy League preppy.
339
00:20:31,462 --> 00:20:34,799
But I'm telling you,
the three of us had some good times.
340
00:20:34,831 --> 00:20:38,736
He wasn't a comedian back then,
he was a very serious actor.
341
00:20:38,770 --> 00:20:40,272
I went to New York,
and went to Julliard,
342
00:20:40,304 --> 00:20:44,441
which was, you know, classical training,
but very much to be a thespian.
343
00:20:44,475 --> 00:20:46,811
For me it was a wonderful thing,
number one to be in New York,
344
00:20:46,843 --> 00:20:49,713
the training and also to get
that type of training
345
00:20:49,746 --> 00:20:53,150
where you get the combination
of classical and the hardcore.
346
00:20:53,184 --> 00:20:55,954
And he was
so believable, visually,
347
00:20:55,986 --> 00:20:59,890
but it's the way he used
his voice, man, he was amazing.
348
00:20:59,924 --> 00:21:02,860
And it blew the faculty's mind
as well as the students.
349
00:21:02,894 --> 00:21:04,596
But he was always funny.
350
00:21:04,628 --> 00:21:06,497
We'd be rehearsing lines,
and he would go off,
351
00:21:06,531 --> 00:21:09,734
"My liege, thou a coxcomb,
thou knowest not."
352
00:21:09,766 --> 00:21:12,070
And he would make up lines
in iambic pentameter,
353
00:21:12,102 --> 00:21:16,941
but of course, you know, R rated
lines, X-rated lines. It was hilarious.
354
00:21:17,908 --> 00:21:19,910
It was hard for him
355
00:21:19,944 --> 00:21:24,416
because there was a lot of politics
going on at Julliard in that time.
356
00:21:24,448 --> 00:21:27,418
He left at the two-thirds
of the way through that year.
357
00:21:30,955 --> 00:21:32,890
I would go back
to San Francisco,
358
00:21:32,924 --> 00:21:35,093
and try and find acting work,
359
00:21:35,126 --> 00:21:37,061
and then took up
stand-up comedy as a...
360
00:21:37,093 --> 00:21:39,797
- Right.
- 'Cause I couldn't find acting work.
361
00:21:39,830 --> 00:21:42,734
The Holy City Zoo was the
club house for all the comedians.
362
00:21:44,167 --> 00:21:45,936
If you could get on a set,
363
00:21:45,969 --> 00:21:49,540
when Robin was promising
to be there that night,
364
00:21:49,573 --> 00:21:51,810
you were gold.
They packed the place.
365
00:21:51,842 --> 00:21:54,678
Ladies and gentlemen,
Robin Williams.
366
00:21:57,247 --> 00:22:01,852
He drained every scintilla
of laughter out of that crowd.
367
00:22:01,886 --> 00:22:05,590
When he did that
crazy stuff he did on stage,
368
00:22:05,622 --> 00:22:08,625
I think it let everybody else
say, "Well, heck!" you know.
369
00:22:08,658 --> 00:22:11,929
Told everybody else, "Yes.
Crazy stuff is acceptable."
370
00:22:11,963 --> 00:22:13,598
Robin is doing
this in the '70s.
371
00:22:13,630 --> 00:22:16,167
I mean ten, 15, 20 years
in some cases
372
00:22:16,199 --> 00:22:18,969
before some of this
is happening elsewhere.
373
00:22:19,003 --> 00:22:21,473
He even came down to
Hollywood and got up on stage
374
00:22:21,505 --> 00:22:22,806
at The Comedy Store
and the Improv
375
00:22:22,840 --> 00:22:24,975
and it was like a landmine
hit them, yeah.
376
00:22:25,009 --> 00:22:27,178
I am not a tuna.
377
00:22:27,211 --> 00:22:31,082
I am not a tuna.
Is anyone here tonight on drugs?
378
00:22:31,115 --> 00:22:33,751
- Yeah!
- Okay.
379
00:22:33,783 --> 00:22:37,088
A quick test right now if you
are it's okay.
380
00:22:37,120 --> 00:22:40,624
Come here just a sec,
dear brother.
381
00:22:40,657 --> 00:22:43,895
The Reverend likes this stuff here.
382
00:22:43,927 --> 00:22:45,964
He was performing
at the Comedy Store,
383
00:22:45,996 --> 00:22:47,532
and he was hilarious.
384
00:22:47,564 --> 00:22:50,567
And I just watched him
and I walked backstage,
385
00:22:50,600 --> 00:22:53,537
and he was sitting on the steps
behind the stage.
386
00:22:53,571 --> 00:22:55,572
I saw him sitting alone.
387
00:22:55,606 --> 00:22:58,109
It seemed so extraordinary
to watch a guy
388
00:22:58,141 --> 00:23:00,143
completely demolish
an audience,
389
00:23:00,176 --> 00:23:04,215
and then seem so distanced
from what he had just done.
390
00:23:04,247 --> 00:23:08,051
No celebration,
just, like, exhausted
391
00:23:08,084 --> 00:23:10,054
from pouring out
so much energy.
392
00:23:17,227 --> 00:23:18,629
I got a phone call.
393
00:23:19,763 --> 00:23:21,599
It was Robin.
394
00:23:21,631 --> 00:23:26,070
He was up in Vancouver and he was
working on Night at the Museum 3,
395
00:23:26,102 --> 00:23:28,872
and he was...
he was having a panic attack,
396
00:23:28,906 --> 00:23:31,676
and he could not
calm himself down.
397
00:23:31,708 --> 00:23:33,777
He's having such a struggle...
398
00:23:35,745 --> 00:23:37,247
remembering just one line.
399
00:23:37,281 --> 00:23:40,918
- Your life depended on me.
- Say that. It wasn't enough that you took a...
400
00:23:40,952 --> 00:23:42,587
He got very frustrated.
401
00:23:42,619 --> 00:23:46,991
I remember him saying to me,
"I'm not me anymore.
402
00:23:47,023 --> 00:23:49,694
"I don't know what's going on.
I'm not me anymore."
403
00:23:49,726 --> 00:23:53,931
His mind was not firing
at the same speed.
404
00:23:53,965 --> 00:23:58,669
That spark was diminished.
405
00:23:58,703 --> 00:24:01,973
Uh, the joy was sometimes
not there.
406
00:24:04,074 --> 00:24:06,544
I had to work harder
editorially,
407
00:24:07,111 --> 00:24:09,046
to create it on screen
408
00:24:09,080 --> 00:24:11,883
because it wasn't always there
in the same way on set.
409
00:24:11,916 --> 00:24:13,083
And I didn't resent that,
410
00:24:13,117 --> 00:24:16,788
it was more taxing, it took
a lot more time and energy,
411
00:24:16,821 --> 00:24:18,356
but if that's what
my guy needed,
412
00:24:18,388 --> 00:24:19,991
then that's what
I was gonna give my guy.
413
00:24:23,293 --> 00:24:26,330
The one thing
that did bother me was the arm.
414
00:24:26,363 --> 00:24:31,268
I'd frequently see him clutching his
hand close to his chest a little bit,
415
00:24:31,301 --> 00:24:34,973
or he'd put it in his pocket
and kind of mask certain things.
416
00:24:35,906 --> 00:24:37,809
We knew that he was fragile,
417
00:24:37,841 --> 00:24:42,714
and the deal was sometimes
we had to let Robin be alone,
418
00:24:42,746 --> 00:24:45,048
take a minute, catch his breath,
419
00:24:45,081 --> 00:24:48,252
particularly at the end
of shooting.
420
00:24:48,284 --> 00:24:51,723
Uh, the last time
I was with him, I was on set.
421
00:24:51,755 --> 00:24:56,226
We were doing, shooting
a, uh, scene in a church,
422
00:24:56,260 --> 00:24:58,296
it was called Glory of Love.
423
00:24:58,329 --> 00:25:01,832
Thought I saw the box move!
424
00:25:01,866 --> 00:25:06,371
And we had a room for him where he
could, uh, go between takes,
425
00:25:06,404 --> 00:25:09,340
and I went into that room,
426
00:25:09,372 --> 00:25:12,275
we talked a little bit
about the scene,
427
00:25:12,309 --> 00:25:17,348
and, um, he asked
a few times, um,
428
00:25:17,380 --> 00:25:19,883
"How's it going? Is it working?"
429
00:25:19,917 --> 00:25:24,722
Um, but the subtext of it was,
"How am I doing? Am I working?"
430
00:25:24,754 --> 00:25:28,225
His sense of security
and confidence,
431
00:25:28,259 --> 00:25:30,228
and who he was
and what he was,
432
00:25:30,261 --> 00:25:32,930
it was something
eroding within him.
433
00:25:32,963 --> 00:25:34,298
We didn't know why.
434
00:25:34,330 --> 00:25:36,167
- You know, you got to give a little.
- Yeah.
435
00:25:36,199 --> 00:25:37,801
'Cause we knew
he was getting tested.
436
00:25:37,834 --> 00:25:41,872
He was feeling, um, infirm,
or not himself,
437
00:25:41,906 --> 00:25:44,175
and he was getting tested,
and I think
438
00:25:44,207 --> 00:25:48,178
that those tests included brain
scans and nothing was showing up.
439
00:25:49,346 --> 00:25:52,784
It wasn't like
he's my son, and I can say,
440
00:25:52,817 --> 00:25:55,019
"All right, timeout.
441
00:25:55,051 --> 00:25:58,790
"I'm going to pull you out of
this because you're getting sick,
442
00:25:58,822 --> 00:26:01,458
"and you need some rest.
And I don't care what the teachers say."
443
00:26:01,492 --> 00:26:03,327
No, no, no.
444
00:26:03,359 --> 00:26:05,830
He's signed up.
These are contracts you don't break.
445
00:26:05,862 --> 00:26:07,364
This is this, this
and the other thing. There's...
446
00:26:09,300 --> 00:26:11,202
What can I do?
447
00:26:11,234 --> 00:26:14,205
And Robin,
he aimed to please every day,
448
00:26:14,237 --> 00:26:16,039
every minute,
he aimed to please.
449
00:26:16,072 --> 00:26:18,775
If the studio or the network
came begging
450
00:26:18,809 --> 00:26:24,081
for more interviews and more publicity,
he would always give it his all.
451
00:26:24,115 --> 00:26:29,287
His intellect and his mental
acumen were so beyond ours
452
00:26:29,320 --> 00:26:32,889
that it could be compromised
a great deal probably,
453
00:26:32,923 --> 00:26:36,928
and he would still be playing
a step ahead of the rest of us.
454
00:26:36,961 --> 00:26:41,199
- How much of the script in the show is you...
- 23.5% improv.
455
00:26:41,232 --> 00:26:43,468
- Good. That's exactly what I wanted...
- 23.5.
456
00:26:43,501 --> 00:26:45,802
- She hasn't finished the question here, Robin.
- But I knew where she was going.
457
00:26:45,836 --> 00:26:50,341
- Oh, okay.
- You dancing? There's one dance number and it's a ballet.
458
00:26:51,475 --> 00:26:55,346
So Lewy Body Dementia,
like all degenerative diseases
459
00:26:55,378 --> 00:26:58,949
is a problem
of plumbing and circuitry.
460
00:26:58,983 --> 00:27:01,351
These degenerative diseases
are caused
461
00:27:01,385 --> 00:27:04,955
by misfolding of proteins
within neurons,
462
00:27:04,988 --> 00:27:08,992
or the parts of the brain that
allow us to move, think and feel.
463
00:27:10,927 --> 00:27:13,430
We have 70 billion neurons.
464
00:27:13,464 --> 00:27:16,501
They slowly disintegrate.
465
00:27:16,533 --> 00:27:21,238
This bad protein alpha-synuclein
relentlessly picks off neurons
466
00:27:21,272 --> 00:27:25,376
in a specific neighborhood,
spreading through that neighborhood,
467
00:27:25,408 --> 00:27:29,781
and then moves into different
neighborhoods in the brain.
468
00:27:29,813 --> 00:27:33,383
And then finally it's swept
across the entire brainstem,
469
00:27:33,417 --> 00:27:36,821
almost every neuron
in that circuit
470
00:27:36,853 --> 00:27:42,125
with sleep, mood, anxiety,
cognition has been affected,
471
00:27:42,158 --> 00:27:46,129
and that is really the late stage
of dementia with Lewy Bodies.
472
00:27:46,163 --> 00:27:49,067
The stage that no one
can get out of.
473
00:27:58,509 --> 00:28:01,579
Soldiers have
very refined bull detectors,
474
00:28:01,611 --> 00:28:05,015
and to see that
instantaneous connection
475
00:28:05,049 --> 00:28:06,885
that Robin was able to make.
476
00:28:09,186 --> 00:28:12,356
Good evening, Baghdad!
477
00:28:12,388 --> 00:28:13,357
Thank you.
478
00:28:13,389 --> 00:28:17,561
What he understood
about the American soldier
479
00:28:17,594 --> 00:28:20,864
was where they came from.
480
00:28:20,898 --> 00:28:23,600
Some of these kids are dying,
they're getting wounded.
481
00:28:23,634 --> 00:28:26,437
He had a way of connecting
with them
482
00:28:26,469 --> 00:28:29,373
that just made them
feel so good.
483
00:28:30,640 --> 00:28:32,442
He was there for them,
484
00:28:32,475 --> 00:28:34,878
and they understood that.
485
00:28:34,911 --> 00:28:38,148
There's combat, hardcore stuff
and then it's a lot of waiting around,
486
00:28:38,182 --> 00:28:40,117
and it's that stuff
where people need
487
00:28:40,149 --> 00:28:42,919
things just to fight the boredom,
and that is most important.
488
00:28:42,953 --> 00:28:47,157
And I think most people are just shocked that
someone showed up. Like, "Why are you here man?"
489
00:28:50,526 --> 00:28:53,864
Afghanistan, six times,
Iraq, five. Yeah, it's crazy.
490
00:28:53,898 --> 00:28:56,434
And you haven't fixed it yet. That's disappointing
491
00:28:56,466 --> 00:28:58,535
You know, from going there,
that's the best audiences in the world.
492
00:29:04,174 --> 00:29:06,109
I do have a story.
493
00:29:06,142 --> 00:29:08,412
I've...
I've got a ton of them.
494
00:29:10,546 --> 00:29:13,416
A young man
was very seriously injured,
495
00:29:13,449 --> 00:29:17,254
and his girlfriend had decided
it was just a little bit
496
00:29:17,288 --> 00:29:18,656
too much for her to handle,
497
00:29:18,688 --> 00:29:22,560
and she had just left
and she was not coming back.
498
00:29:22,592 --> 00:29:26,096
She was on her way
to the airport.
499
00:29:26,129 --> 00:29:32,203
So we walked in and you could tell
that he was in, um, in despair.
500
00:29:32,235 --> 00:29:36,206
And how afraid
that he was, in going forward,
501
00:29:36,240 --> 00:29:38,643
that he would never
have another girlfriend,
502
00:29:38,676 --> 00:29:42,280
you know, about what his life
was going to be like.
503
00:29:42,312 --> 00:29:47,484
And, um, Robin pulled up
his chair right beside his bed
504
00:29:47,517 --> 00:29:50,921
and started talking about fear.
505
00:29:50,955 --> 00:29:53,357
He went into some
very personal things.
506
00:29:53,389 --> 00:29:56,026
I think we probably
stayed an hour and a half.
507
00:29:56,060 --> 00:29:58,596
And, you know, we walked out,
508
00:29:58,628 --> 00:30:02,433
and, um, Robin actually said,
509
00:30:02,465 --> 00:30:04,368
"Boy, that was a tough one."
510
00:30:04,400 --> 00:30:09,039
He said, "Because for all of us,
confronting our fears
511
00:30:09,072 --> 00:30:11,708
"is a very difficult thing
to do."
512
00:30:11,742 --> 00:30:15,280
And he said, "I'm sure nobody ever
thinks I'm afraid of anything."
513
00:30:17,380 --> 00:30:21,118
That was a big topic
of conversation.
514
00:30:21,150 --> 00:30:23,486
Was their spouse
going to stay with them?
515
00:30:23,520 --> 00:30:26,991
Were people going to be
looking at them differently?
516
00:30:27,023 --> 00:30:29,627
He actually talked
about those kinds of things.
517
00:30:29,659 --> 00:30:34,298
He was willing to sit and talk
about some of his own fears.
518
00:30:36,734 --> 00:30:40,571
And, um, I'll never forget
one day and he said,
519
00:30:40,603 --> 00:30:42,305
"Oh, Elaine,
that was a tough one."
520
00:30:42,339 --> 00:30:44,642
And he said,
"He doesn't know that,
521
00:30:44,675 --> 00:30:49,213
"but I have been so close to what
he was talking about myself."
522
00:31:00,057 --> 00:31:02,493
It was early May
and he came home,
523
00:31:02,525 --> 00:31:07,330
and it was like a plane
coming in with no landing gear.
524
00:31:07,363 --> 00:31:12,369
His resources
were just... spent.
525
00:31:12,403 --> 00:31:15,606
We were supposed to go
to some friends and, um,
526
00:31:15,638 --> 00:31:18,443
Robin couldn't,
he couldn't get out of bed.
527
00:31:20,711 --> 00:31:24,181
It was becoming more
of a normal that,
528
00:31:24,214 --> 00:31:25,416
"Robin is not feeling well.
529
00:31:27,350 --> 00:31:30,654
"And I can't tell you why.
530
00:31:30,686 --> 00:31:32,255
"We're just gonna stay home."
531
00:31:32,789 --> 00:31:34,993
His delusional looping
532
00:31:36,260 --> 00:31:37,996
would just kick in at night.
533
00:31:39,629 --> 00:31:43,633
We'd gone to a birthday party, um,
our dear, dear friend, Mort Sahl.
534
00:31:45,269 --> 00:31:47,138
That night,
535
00:31:47,170 --> 00:31:50,273
Robin was up,
and he started talking about,
536
00:31:50,307 --> 00:31:54,245
he was so afraid that Mort was not
going to make it through the night.
537
00:31:55,745 --> 00:31:58,349
You know, so we started
to have this discussion again.
538
00:31:58,381 --> 00:31:59,716
It's like 12,
one o'clock at night,
539
00:31:59,750 --> 00:32:02,053
and it goes to like
3:30 in the morning.
540
00:32:02,086 --> 00:32:04,388
And I mean, it goes,
we're covering all the bases
541
00:32:04,420 --> 00:32:08,491
because he's convinced that he
should go to Mort's house right now,
542
00:32:08,524 --> 00:32:09,761
and make sure he's okay.
543
00:32:11,794 --> 00:32:14,164
That night
he was texting Mort, like,
544
00:32:14,197 --> 00:32:17,667
"Are you okay? Are you okay?" And
Mort's asleep, most likely, you know.
545
00:32:17,701 --> 00:32:20,704
And so because he wasn't getting
a response from Mort
546
00:32:20,736 --> 00:32:23,474
at two o'clock in the morning,
he wanted to go there.
547
00:32:25,641 --> 00:32:29,112
So this was a typical night
for us.
548
00:32:31,380 --> 00:32:33,249
There is something wrong.
549
00:32:33,282 --> 00:32:35,586
There is something
not right here.
550
00:32:40,189 --> 00:32:42,526
And he said, "I just want
to reboot my brain.
551
00:32:43,726 --> 00:32:45,595
"I just want
to reboot my brain."
552
00:32:52,769 --> 00:32:55,573
We started to see some physical
things happening to him,
553
00:32:55,606 --> 00:32:58,509
and he was trying to hide it with
his arm and things like that.
554
00:32:58,542 --> 00:32:59,644
So we started to see it.
555
00:33:01,044 --> 00:33:04,414
One point,
he came up and he was in a tee shirt.
556
00:33:04,447 --> 00:33:06,783
His ribs were actually showing.
557
00:33:06,817 --> 00:33:11,289
I grabbed his skin.
"Robin, you're really getting thin."
558
00:33:12,688 --> 00:33:15,658
He said, "Yeah, boss,
I've gone to the doctor,
559
00:33:15,692 --> 00:33:18,561
"but I don't know what it is."
560
00:33:18,594 --> 00:33:20,630
When he came to a party,
and we were all there,
561
00:33:20,664 --> 00:33:24,602
the comedians were,
they were flummoxed,
562
00:33:24,635 --> 00:33:27,204
they were overwhelmed.
563
00:33:27,236 --> 00:33:31,641
And he was off lurking
in the corners alone.
564
00:33:31,675 --> 00:33:34,177
I mean, can you imagine, you're at
a party and you're, "Where's Robin?"
565
00:33:34,211 --> 00:33:37,481
And you look and he's over in the
corner fiddling around with a bush,
566
00:33:37,513 --> 00:33:40,184
or something like,
well, this is not good.
567
00:33:41,517 --> 00:33:45,155
He was suffering
and you could tell it.
568
00:33:45,188 --> 00:33:48,359
I tried to get him to go
to a James Taylor concert with us,
569
00:33:48,391 --> 00:33:49,893
and he says,
"I don't think I can."
570
00:33:49,926 --> 00:33:52,396
I go, "I mean, I know you're tired,
but I'll drive and I'll come get you.
571
00:33:52,428 --> 00:33:53,898
"And we have the tickets
and it's on me."
572
00:33:53,930 --> 00:33:56,199
And he goes, "No, I don't think
I can leave the house."
573
00:33:56,233 --> 00:33:59,637
And that kind of, scared me
a little bit, you know,
574
00:33:59,669 --> 00:34:03,206
'cause he was serious
and I go, "Okay."
575
00:34:03,240 --> 00:34:06,911
And I didn't really press him on it,
but I mean, he was leveling with me
576
00:34:06,944 --> 00:34:08,779
that "I don't think I could
leave my house right now."
577
00:34:10,214 --> 00:34:11,949
And his speech patterns
changed a little bit
578
00:34:11,982 --> 00:34:14,485
that I don't know how to...
It's hard for me to talk about it.
579
00:34:14,518 --> 00:34:15,985
I knew there was something
going on.
580
00:34:16,020 --> 00:34:19,757
I spoke with Robin almost
every day or text and stuff,
581
00:34:19,790 --> 00:34:22,326
I witnessed
his processing reality
582
00:34:22,359 --> 00:34:25,696
completely different
than the way everybody else.
583
00:34:25,728 --> 00:34:27,598
And it just, the only reason
I talk about that
584
00:34:27,630 --> 00:34:31,668
is his brain
was giving him misinformation.
585
00:34:31,701 --> 00:34:33,270
Complete misinformation.
586
00:34:41,511 --> 00:34:45,917
Going from where Robin
and I had our world together,
587
00:34:46,484 --> 00:34:49,386
that was our sanctuary.
588
00:34:49,418 --> 00:34:51,688
Oh, it's so lovely to see
that you're so happy and everything.
589
00:34:51,721 --> 00:34:52,924
How did the two of you meet?
590
00:34:54,891 --> 00:34:57,461
Seriously,
outside an Apple store.
591
00:34:58,929 --> 00:35:00,397
It was a busy Saturday.
592
00:35:00,431 --> 00:35:04,335
I had to go to the Apple store,
and I start heading to the back,
593
00:35:04,368 --> 00:35:07,670
and I see this man
dressed in camo.
594
00:35:07,703 --> 00:35:11,641
He was just smiling at me and I thought,
"I think that's Robin Williams."
595
00:35:14,710 --> 00:35:17,214
And I thought, "All right,
I'm just gonna go and say hi."
596
00:35:20,016 --> 00:35:23,419
I had camo pants on and she said,
"How's that camo working for you?"
597
00:35:23,453 --> 00:35:25,788
"Really good, obviously,
you saw it."
598
00:35:25,822 --> 00:35:29,893
We just started talking and we
had the connection of 12 step stuff.
599
00:35:29,926 --> 00:35:34,697
You know, we both had crazy drug and
alcohol days earlier in our lives.
600
00:35:34,730 --> 00:35:37,267
He knew enough information
to be able to find me,
601
00:35:37,301 --> 00:35:39,904
if he wanted to, you know,
I'm one of the regular 12 step meetings.
602
00:35:40,871 --> 00:35:42,740
The next Tuesday night,
603
00:35:42,772 --> 00:35:45,742
I was at my regular thing.
604
00:35:45,775 --> 00:35:47,777
I looked around the room, I didn't see him.
I thought, "Oh, well."
605
00:35:47,810 --> 00:35:50,780
Midway through the meeting
I turned around,
606
00:35:50,813 --> 00:35:53,917
and, uh, there he...
there he was in the back of the room.
607
00:35:53,949 --> 00:35:56,986
Then I turned around real quick and
thought, "Oh my God, he's here."
608
00:35:57,020 --> 00:35:59,523
Well, it was, kind of sweet
and then I was like off and running.
609
00:35:59,556 --> 00:36:00,657
It was wonderful.
610
00:36:00,690 --> 00:36:04,895
He told me he met this girl,
and she knocked him out.
611
00:36:04,927 --> 00:36:06,663
Well, he told me
he was in love.
612
00:36:06,697 --> 00:36:09,367
You know, men don't usually
say that to each other.
613
00:36:30,554 --> 00:36:34,391
My partner in crime who we've been
walking clean and sober together,
614
00:36:34,424 --> 00:36:39,996
and enjoying all the rawness and
authenticity of life together.
615
00:36:40,029 --> 00:36:42,765
Like here. This is Susan and
Robin and it was great you know.
616
00:36:42,799 --> 00:36:47,003
It was like a, "I'm going to raise up.
Let me lift myself up to love."
617
00:36:54,511 --> 00:37:00,351
We just had a theme, a way of
approaching life that was so in sync.
618
00:37:00,384 --> 00:37:01,886
We just were like
two little kids.
619
00:37:06,857 --> 00:37:10,127
We were looking
at the world together,
620
00:37:10,159 --> 00:37:13,029
you know, almost like
through each other's eyes.
621
00:37:14,831 --> 00:37:16,734
That was like having
a best friend, you know,
622
00:37:16,766 --> 00:37:18,768
where you could really
explore life together.
623
00:37:26,509 --> 00:37:28,378
Yeah, we dated
for about four years.
624
00:37:28,411 --> 00:37:32,616
We'd had promise rings that
we'd worn for a year already.
625
00:37:32,648 --> 00:37:36,453
Doesn't everybody do promise rings?
I don't know.
626
00:37:36,485 --> 00:37:38,054
We knew we wanted
to get married.
627
00:37:42,859 --> 00:37:45,529
October 22nd, 2011,
628
00:37:46,163 --> 00:37:47,665
it was storybook.
629
00:37:48,831 --> 00:37:51,402
Wow. I'm just picturing him.
Um...
630
00:37:51,435 --> 00:37:52,603
He sure looked good.
631
00:37:56,473 --> 00:37:59,844
A part of my wedding vows
was really all about...
632
00:38:00,777 --> 00:38:03,080
loving him as he is.
633
00:38:03,112 --> 00:38:05,382
I've no desire
to change this man.
634
00:38:08,784 --> 00:38:10,487
And you had
your honeymoon in Paris?
635
00:38:10,520 --> 00:38:11,822
- Oh, it was wonderful.
- Yeah?
636
00:38:11,855 --> 00:38:13,956
The great thing is in Paris,
all the paparazzi
637
00:38:13,989 --> 00:38:15,090
are like wildlife
photographers.
638
00:38:15,125 --> 00:38:18,195
Obviously you look over there
like, Robin, kiss her.
639
00:38:18,228 --> 00:38:20,030
Lift up her skirt.
No, get away from me.
640
00:38:20,063 --> 00:38:22,566
Kiss her, kiss her,
do it now.
641
00:38:22,598 --> 00:38:25,535
The comedian will now attempt
to kiss the tall woman.
642
00:38:32,241 --> 00:38:34,644
He had
come home from
643
00:38:34,677 --> 00:38:36,712
A Night at the Museum.
644
00:38:36,746 --> 00:38:37,948
He was basically home
for a week.
645
00:38:38,982 --> 00:38:41,819
He was absolutely exhausted.
646
00:38:41,851 --> 00:38:43,987
We were looking
at a week of testing.
647
00:38:44,020 --> 00:38:45,656
The calendar
was just booked.
648
00:38:45,688 --> 00:38:47,924
So, we had this day
at the beginning of it all.
649
00:38:47,958 --> 00:38:49,059
I said, you know,
"Why don't we go out
650
00:38:49,092 --> 00:38:51,928
"to Tennessee Valley,
go on a walkabout there,"
651
00:38:51,962 --> 00:38:54,498
which we loved.
We just loved our walks.
652
00:38:54,531 --> 00:38:55,431
This is when I realized
653
00:38:55,465 --> 00:38:57,801
my honey had never
ever been on a picnic.
654
00:38:59,235 --> 00:39:01,638
It was a pretty
windy day.
655
00:39:01,670 --> 00:39:03,674
But as we got out there,
there weren't a lot of people
656
00:39:03,706 --> 00:39:04,708
and, um,
657
00:39:05,775 --> 00:39:07,211
it was so nice
658
00:39:07,243 --> 00:39:09,012
to have space around us
659
00:39:09,645 --> 00:39:10,680
in nature.
660
00:39:10,714 --> 00:39:12,850
We went over
to the rocks and, um,
661
00:39:13,683 --> 00:39:15,752
ate our sandwiches
and it was just us
662
00:39:15,784 --> 00:39:18,087
and it was peaceful.
663
00:39:18,121 --> 00:39:20,891
It was one of those moments
in the midst of this
664
00:39:20,924 --> 00:39:22,826
frenzy of trying to find out
what's going on.
665
00:39:22,859 --> 00:39:24,761
Like the drum beat
was getting more and more.
666
00:39:26,196 --> 00:39:28,197
And he was depleted.
667
00:39:28,230 --> 00:39:29,566
He was so...
668
00:39:30,634 --> 00:39:31,836
so depleted.
669
00:39:32,268 --> 00:39:34,036
And, uh...
670
00:39:34,069 --> 00:39:36,172
he just put his head
down in my lap,
671
00:39:36,206 --> 00:39:38,742
you know, and I just,
I just stroked his hair and...
672
00:39:40,777 --> 00:39:42,713
He just laid
in my lap for like,
673
00:39:42,746 --> 00:39:43,747
couple hours.
674
00:39:44,947 --> 00:39:46,549
Well, the guy was tired.
675
00:39:53,656 --> 00:39:55,959
So, the first time
that Robin came into my shop,
676
00:39:56,993 --> 00:39:58,728
it was in 1983
677
00:39:58,761 --> 00:40:01,898
and it was shortly after
John Belushi died.
678
00:40:04,000 --> 00:40:05,768
When John Belushi
passed away...
679
00:40:07,871 --> 00:40:10,107
it devastated Robin.
680
00:40:10,139 --> 00:40:12,109
John was crazier
than anybody,
681
00:40:12,141 --> 00:40:13,877
and, but man,
did he pay the price
682
00:40:13,909 --> 00:40:15,212
and, and, you know,
683
00:40:15,244 --> 00:40:17,982
it hit him like
a sheet of cold ice.
684
00:40:19,014 --> 00:40:21,150
He pulled out
of a dive.
685
00:40:21,183 --> 00:40:22,919
He stopped everything,
686
00:40:22,953 --> 00:40:24,888
but white wine
for one year
687
00:40:24,920 --> 00:40:26,022
and he didn't go to AA.
688
00:40:26,056 --> 00:40:28,292
And I mean, "Wow how are
you doing this?"
689
00:40:28,324 --> 00:40:30,726
And he goes, "Just because
I have to," you know.
690
00:40:30,759 --> 00:40:31,761
He didn't want to die.
691
00:40:31,795 --> 00:40:33,730
Then of course,
he'd always been
692
00:40:33,763 --> 00:40:35,632
really physical, you know,
he was an athlete,
693
00:40:35,665 --> 00:40:36,967
he was a good athlete.
694
00:40:37,000 --> 00:40:38,902
He took up cycling.
695
00:40:38,935 --> 00:40:40,637
And he started riding
more and more
696
00:40:40,670 --> 00:40:42,106
and we started seeing him
more and more.
697
00:40:42,672 --> 00:40:45,042
You are a keen cyclist?
698
00:40:45,074 --> 00:40:46,342
Yes, sir.
I am a bike sexual.
699
00:40:46,375 --> 00:40:47,844
Yes, sir. I like
to ride the bike.
700
00:40:49,145 --> 00:40:50,980
I mean for me,
it's my meditation.
701
00:40:51,014 --> 00:40:52,883
It's what I do.
I can, uh,
702
00:40:52,915 --> 00:40:53,984
get on my bike
and ride about,
703
00:40:54,016 --> 00:40:56,619
sometimes 20 miles,
sometimes 40, or 50 miles
704
00:40:56,652 --> 00:40:57,754
and it's great.
It's beautiful.
705
00:40:59,154 --> 00:41:00,223
He said that,
706
00:41:00,255 --> 00:41:02,960
you know, cycling was
the closest thing to flying
707
00:41:03,860 --> 00:41:05,862
and it allowed him
708
00:41:05,895 --> 00:41:06,929
to free himself
709
00:41:06,962 --> 00:41:09,265
from all the things
that went on in his mind
710
00:41:09,299 --> 00:41:11,601
because his mind
was so active, right?
711
00:41:12,802 --> 00:41:15,105
Robin and running
and biking
712
00:41:15,138 --> 00:41:16,840
was always in struggle.
713
00:41:16,873 --> 00:41:18,175
You know, you have
to push yourself,
714
00:41:18,208 --> 00:41:19,243
you have
to challenge yourself.
715
00:41:20,743 --> 00:41:22,378
And Robin as an artist,
716
00:41:22,411 --> 00:41:25,047
challenged himself
to do roles
717
00:41:25,081 --> 00:41:26,350
that were like,
718
00:41:27,217 --> 00:41:28,952
stretching himself.
719
00:41:28,985 --> 00:41:31,888
He wanted to prove that
he wasn't just a comedic actor,
720
00:41:31,920 --> 00:41:32,922
he was an actor.
721
00:41:32,956 --> 00:41:34,324
When you're improvising,
you're going out looking.
722
00:41:34,357 --> 00:41:36,994
I'd be going and talking to flowers
and how are you doing? Please cough.
723
00:41:37,027 --> 00:41:39,396
You know, when you're playing
like that, you're going out.
724
00:41:39,429 --> 00:41:42,065
But by stopping that,
you force the energy to implode
725
00:41:42,098 --> 00:41:44,266
and you find,
you can explore yourself.
726
00:41:44,299 --> 00:41:46,603
Either memories
or different emotions.
727
00:41:48,672 --> 00:41:50,040
Oh, Captain,
my captain.
728
00:41:50,072 --> 00:41:51,141
Sit down, Mister...
729
00:41:51,174 --> 00:41:53,342
Dead Poets Society
almost didn't happen
730
00:41:53,375 --> 00:41:55,711
because they really
just wanted him to do it.
731
00:41:55,744 --> 00:41:56,980
The writer asked me...
732
00:41:57,980 --> 00:41:59,683
"How could we get Robin
733
00:41:59,715 --> 00:42:01,317
"to reconsider this
and maybe do this?"
734
00:42:01,351 --> 00:42:03,720
I said, "Well, you need
to involve him
735
00:42:03,752 --> 00:42:04,955
"in the creative process
736
00:42:04,987 --> 00:42:07,190
"and at least
give him a voice
737
00:42:07,223 --> 00:42:09,359
"in choosing the director."
738
00:42:09,391 --> 00:42:10,926
I said, "Make him
a short list."
739
00:42:10,960 --> 00:42:12,795
But Peter Weir
was at the top of it
740
00:42:12,828 --> 00:42:14,897
and he said, "I'm in,
if you can get Peter Weir."
741
00:42:15,699 --> 00:42:16,700
And it happened.
742
00:42:18,467 --> 00:42:20,002
Thank you, boys.
743
00:42:20,036 --> 00:42:21,938
Yeah, he gave me
a sweet gift and, um,
744
00:42:21,971 --> 00:42:23,239
and I mean...
745
00:42:23,272 --> 00:42:24,907
When he's looking
at the yearbook
746
00:42:24,940 --> 00:42:26,676
from when
he was a student.
747
00:42:26,710 --> 00:42:29,012
Gentlemen.
748
00:42:29,045 --> 00:42:30,848
We were just looking
in your old annual.
749
00:42:32,348 --> 00:42:34,317
Oh, my God.
750
00:42:34,350 --> 00:42:35,985
- Then the kids...
- No, it's not...
751
00:42:36,018 --> 00:42:37,053
...show him this yearbook.
752
00:42:37,087 --> 00:42:38,722
He gets down on his knees
and just...
753
00:42:38,755 --> 00:42:40,190
No, it's not me.
754
00:42:40,223 --> 00:42:42,292
Stanley
"the toll" Wilson.
755
00:42:42,324 --> 00:42:44,226
Stanley "the tool" Wilson.
756
00:42:44,259 --> 00:42:45,428
Which was his
nickname for me.
757
00:42:49,065 --> 00:42:50,701
What was the dead
poets society?
758
00:42:52,402 --> 00:42:53,904
So, I'm sitting with him
at the premiere
759
00:42:53,936 --> 00:42:54,938
next to the heads
of Disney
760
00:42:54,971 --> 00:42:57,139
and he was smiling
and he wouldn't look at me.
761
00:42:57,172 --> 00:42:59,475
But I started crying
when this came on
762
00:42:59,509 --> 00:43:02,244
and that was his
thank you to me for helping.
763
00:43:02,277 --> 00:43:04,013
And he was brilliant.
764
00:43:04,047 --> 00:43:06,150
Invincible
just like you feel.
765
00:43:07,116 --> 00:43:08,217
The world
is their oyster.
766
00:43:08,252 --> 00:43:11,221
He always wanted
to push himself. He did.
767
00:43:11,253 --> 00:43:13,223
And I think that's
incredibly admirable
768
00:43:13,255 --> 00:43:15,192
because you don't
have to do that.
769
00:43:15,225 --> 00:43:16,460
When you're wealthy
and famous
770
00:43:16,493 --> 00:43:18,295
and people,
the world over love you
771
00:43:18,328 --> 00:43:19,763
and want you
to make them laugh.
772
00:43:29,139 --> 00:43:31,274
We liked to go
play basketball
773
00:43:31,306 --> 00:43:32,341
with a local group
774
00:43:32,375 --> 00:43:35,779
that helps develop
mentally disabled adults.
775
00:43:38,380 --> 00:43:41,484
His neurologist,
who also attends that,
776
00:43:41,518 --> 00:43:44,920
had, um, not seen him
since December,
777
00:43:44,953 --> 00:43:48,859
when the suspicion
about his, uh...
778
00:43:48,891 --> 00:43:51,393
the shaking of his hand was,
you know it was...
779
00:43:51,427 --> 00:43:52,895
keep an eye on it,
but at that point
780
00:43:52,929 --> 00:43:56,066
it was so minimal maybe it's because
of this previous shoulder injury.
781
00:43:57,433 --> 00:43:59,902
Well, basically
that night, um,
782
00:43:59,935 --> 00:44:01,971
that doctor made
a visual diagnosis
783
00:44:02,005 --> 00:44:03,207
from way across court.
784
00:44:11,447 --> 00:44:14,084
All he knew was that we were going
to be going in to see the GP.
785
00:44:15,418 --> 00:44:17,087
When he was told
he had Parkinson's...
786
00:44:22,225 --> 00:44:23,860
and they're saying
it's early to mild
787
00:44:23,893 --> 00:44:25,427
and, you know,
that's great.
788
00:44:25,460 --> 00:44:27,163
So, okay, we get
on medications,
789
00:44:27,197 --> 00:44:30,233
we'll figure this out, you know,
you'll get it adjusted.
790
00:44:30,266 --> 00:44:32,369
They were saying
ten good years.
791
00:44:32,402 --> 00:44:34,170
I could see
he wasn't buying it.
792
00:44:35,103 --> 00:44:36,339
Robin got to ask
793
00:44:37,172 --> 00:44:38,507
these questions, um,
794
00:44:38,540 --> 00:44:40,243
which at the time
seems like...
795
00:44:41,578 --> 00:44:42,780
you know...
796
00:44:44,514 --> 00:44:47,884
He asked,
"Am I, um...
797
00:44:47,917 --> 00:44:49,853
"Do I have Alzheimer's?
798
00:44:49,886 --> 00:44:51,087
"Do I have dementia?
799
00:44:51,119 --> 00:44:52,188
"Am I schizophrenic?"
800
00:44:56,326 --> 00:44:58,362
And the answers were,
no, no and no.
801
00:45:01,029 --> 00:45:03,065
The real depth
of these symptoms,
802
00:45:03,098 --> 00:45:05,000
he only knew,
803
00:45:05,034 --> 00:45:06,970
the rest of us were working
with what we could.
804
00:45:08,638 --> 00:45:12,141
In Robin's case,
there was a focus on his movement.
805
00:45:12,174 --> 00:45:14,109
But I think internally
for Robin,
806
00:45:14,143 --> 00:45:16,012
this was only
a tiny part
807
00:45:16,045 --> 00:45:19,449
of the symptoms that he
was experiencing.
808
00:45:19,482 --> 00:45:22,018
Another very early
feature of dementia
809
00:45:22,051 --> 00:45:25,522
with Lewy Bodies
is visual hallucinations.
810
00:45:25,554 --> 00:45:27,890
They often believe
that these
811
00:45:27,924 --> 00:45:30,293
hallucinations are real.
812
00:45:30,326 --> 00:45:33,263
So, for Robin learning that
he had Parkinson's disease
813
00:45:33,295 --> 00:45:34,297
was not enough.
814
00:45:40,435 --> 00:45:41,571
He's an
old friend of mine
815
00:45:41,603 --> 00:45:44,174
and a former classmate
at Julliard School in New York,
816
00:45:44,206 --> 00:45:45,208
Robin Williams.
817
00:45:48,344 --> 00:45:50,380
- You gotta keep that. Here you go.
- Looky there!
818
00:45:51,281 --> 00:45:52,516
Or is somebody's fantasy.
819
00:45:57,987 --> 00:46:00,557
Robin and Christopher
were very good friends.
820
00:46:00,589 --> 00:46:02,892
Christopher was a preppy
from New England, and that was our
821
00:46:03,560 --> 00:46:05,561
slightly younger brother.
822
00:46:05,594 --> 00:46:07,997
And the three of us were,
you know, brother Williams,
823
00:46:08,031 --> 00:46:09,333
brother Wilson
and brother Reeve.
824
00:46:15,270 --> 00:46:18,173
Christopher, we went to see him
when he first had this accident.
825
00:46:18,206 --> 00:46:20,576
He just had
the accident and...
826
00:46:20,610 --> 00:46:23,213
there were people making decisions
whether or not to keep him,
827
00:46:23,246 --> 00:46:24,547
you know,
on life support.
828
00:46:24,580 --> 00:46:26,282
Robin went in disguised
as a doctor
829
00:46:26,315 --> 00:46:28,118
in the emergency room.
830
00:46:28,150 --> 00:46:30,920
I said, I was
a Russian proctologist
831
00:46:30,953 --> 00:46:32,621
and most of the other doctors,
"Oh, no."
832
00:46:32,654 --> 00:46:35,090
and he looked up at me going,
"Hey, brother, what's up?"
833
00:46:35,123 --> 00:46:36,659
And I said, "Would you mind,
I'm just going to do a brief exam,
834
00:46:36,692 --> 00:46:39,662
"like what you said if you feel
two fingers, it's your luck."
835
00:46:41,563 --> 00:46:43,098
You know,
and he laughed
836
00:46:43,132 --> 00:46:44,501
and he said, "Hey, brother,
what's happening?"
837
00:46:44,534 --> 00:46:47,337
And it was that idea of even
in the face of that.
838
00:46:47,369 --> 00:46:49,038
And it helped.
I mean, he,
839
00:46:49,072 --> 00:46:50,474
you know,
he's an extraordinary guy.
840
00:46:52,141 --> 00:46:56,145
First one to show up down in
Virginia when I was really in trouble.
841
00:46:56,179 --> 00:46:58,648
He came here to Kessler
one afternoon and just...
842
00:47:01,551 --> 00:47:03,420
Thank God I wear
a seatbelt on this chair
843
00:47:03,453 --> 00:47:05,121
because I would have
fallen out laughing.
844
00:47:08,257 --> 00:47:11,194
When Christopher, we went to
see him when he first had this accident,
845
00:47:11,226 --> 00:47:14,431
we both talked and said,
"I never knew he was strong,"
846
00:47:14,464 --> 00:47:16,299
and Robin didn't either.
And he says,
847
00:47:16,331 --> 00:47:19,234
"I don't think
I could go through that"
848
00:47:19,268 --> 00:47:21,103
"and I wouldn't want to,"
you know.
849
00:47:26,542 --> 00:47:28,210
He looked very frail
850
00:47:28,243 --> 00:47:31,113
when he came back
from the museum picture.
851
00:47:31,147 --> 00:47:33,183
He used to come over like,
every afternoon.
852
00:47:34,449 --> 00:47:36,453
He'd sit in the chair
right at the corner.
853
00:47:38,186 --> 00:47:40,257
He'd mumble along
854
00:47:40,790 --> 00:47:42,225
about it but...
855
00:47:43,759 --> 00:47:46,362
he never described
the severity to me
856
00:47:47,362 --> 00:47:49,264
of losing everything.
857
00:47:49,297 --> 00:47:51,467
I'd trick him even when
he got depressed,
858
00:47:52,534 --> 00:47:54,636
I'd say,
"Well, a lot of times
859
00:47:54,670 --> 00:47:56,172
"I want to jump off
the roof."
860
00:47:56,205 --> 00:47:57,340
"Really?" He'd say.
861
00:47:57,373 --> 00:47:59,676
But I said, "Yeah."
862
00:48:01,411 --> 00:48:03,647
I said, "You can't jump off
the roof because...
863
00:48:06,315 --> 00:48:08,451
"you can't leave
Susan alone."
864
00:48:08,484 --> 00:48:11,520
And as soon as I got anywhere
near saying that and he would go,
865
00:48:11,554 --> 00:48:13,290
"Ooh. Ooh."
866
00:48:13,857 --> 00:48:16,159
Admiration all the time,
867
00:48:16,192 --> 00:48:18,594
that's the thing
he kept getting
868
00:48:18,627 --> 00:48:21,196
over to me all the time
and saying,
869
00:48:21,230 --> 00:48:22,599
"Now, I finally got it right."
870
00:48:23,665 --> 00:48:25,768
So, he saw
a tremendous irony...
871
00:48:28,670 --> 00:48:30,239
in getting sick.
872
00:48:32,607 --> 00:48:34,744
He had these
introspective moments.
873
00:48:36,746 --> 00:48:38,315
And a lot of depression
874
00:48:39,348 --> 00:48:40,384
as it approached,
875
00:48:43,152 --> 00:48:45,388
but he didn't verbalize
that to me
876
00:48:45,420 --> 00:48:46,489
and, uh...
877
00:48:49,558 --> 00:48:51,093
he just wasn't
laughing a lot.
878
00:48:55,163 --> 00:48:58,634
People believe that
there is psychology
879
00:48:58,668 --> 00:49:00,603
and then
there's neuroscience
880
00:49:00,636 --> 00:49:02,304
and they're not
the same.
881
00:49:02,337 --> 00:49:04,273
But in fact
it's all related
882
00:49:04,306 --> 00:49:06,176
to how our brain circuits
are working.
883
00:49:07,610 --> 00:49:10,547
This is very hard for our society
to understanding and grapple with
884
00:49:10,580 --> 00:49:12,715
because we have
a different way of thinking
885
00:49:12,748 --> 00:49:14,384
about psychiatric disease.
886
00:49:14,417 --> 00:49:16,319
There's not a realization
887
00:49:16,351 --> 00:49:18,687
that the chemical changes
in the brain
888
00:49:18,721 --> 00:49:22,391
are responsible for
the psychiatric symptoms.
889
00:49:22,424 --> 00:49:25,661
Lewy Body Disease,
it is brain circuits
890
00:49:25,694 --> 00:49:27,397
that cause troubles
891
00:49:27,429 --> 00:49:30,699
that people assume are,
you know, behavioral,
892
00:49:30,732 --> 00:49:33,168
not potentially related
to a disease.
893
00:49:33,201 --> 00:49:35,772
Someone has Parkinson's disease
and they have shaking
894
00:49:35,804 --> 00:49:37,306
and they can't walk.
895
00:49:37,339 --> 00:49:39,775
Then, oh,
that's clearly a disease.
896
00:49:39,808 --> 00:49:42,478
But in fact
it's pure semantics.
897
00:49:42,511 --> 00:49:43,546
There's no difference.
898
00:49:43,580 --> 00:49:46,482
It's just different circuits
are being affected.
899
00:49:46,516 --> 00:49:49,385
It flows over
someone like a massive wave,
900
00:49:49,418 --> 00:49:51,421
no matter how moral,
901
00:49:51,453 --> 00:49:53,222
ethical, good,
902
00:49:53,255 --> 00:49:55,190
brilliant someone is.
903
00:49:55,223 --> 00:49:57,192
When they get,
you know, disease
904
00:49:57,226 --> 00:49:59,863
of the magnitude
of dementia with Lewy Bodies,
905
00:49:59,895 --> 00:50:01,363
they get very sick
906
00:50:01,397 --> 00:50:04,201
and they change enormously
in a psychiatric way.
907
00:50:05,668 --> 00:50:07,403
It affects sleep
very early.
908
00:50:07,435 --> 00:50:11,573
This is another very hard part
of Lewy Body Disease.
909
00:50:11,607 --> 00:50:14,543
When they're asleep,
they suddenly act out their dreams,
910
00:50:14,576 --> 00:50:17,147
we call REM behavior.
911
00:50:17,179 --> 00:50:18,815
They can strike out
during a dream
912
00:50:18,848 --> 00:50:20,550
and actually hit people
at night.
913
00:50:21,884 --> 00:50:24,320
The lack of sleep
had been building
914
00:50:24,353 --> 00:50:27,490
very intensely
since December.
915
00:50:27,522 --> 00:50:28,790
He's thrashing
at night now,
916
00:50:28,824 --> 00:50:30,827
which is a Parkinsonian
type symptom.
917
00:50:31,761 --> 00:50:33,096
So, now,
918
00:50:33,128 --> 00:50:35,464
what was happening,
you know when you first fall asleep,
919
00:50:35,498 --> 00:50:37,833
like, you start to go deep
pretty quick if you're tired?
920
00:50:37,866 --> 00:50:39,635
He would go,
921
00:50:39,668 --> 00:50:41,203
"Honey, what did
you think about..."
922
00:50:41,237 --> 00:50:43,840
Like in a daytime voice,
he was loud.
923
00:50:45,674 --> 00:50:47,176
No one was getting sleep.
924
00:50:47,210 --> 00:50:49,846
It was impossible
because the delusional looping.
925
00:50:51,614 --> 00:50:54,918
And then the degree
to which the paranoia
926
00:50:54,951 --> 00:50:57,621
came in,
it was so drastic.
927
00:50:58,888 --> 00:51:00,590
He's just going
from room to room,
928
00:51:00,623 --> 00:51:01,925
literally watching me,
929
00:51:01,958 --> 00:51:03,760
he's making a lot
of phone calls
930
00:51:03,793 --> 00:51:06,396
and texting people
and questioning.
931
00:51:06,429 --> 00:51:08,565
I'm sure. I know it was
a lot about questioning
932
00:51:09,065 --> 00:51:11,434
my loyalty to him.
933
00:51:14,302 --> 00:51:16,371
And then I'm like
back in the studio
934
00:51:16,404 --> 00:51:17,940
and he's watching me
935
00:51:17,973 --> 00:51:20,809
and he's standing there
in a frozen stance.
936
00:51:21,944 --> 00:51:23,446
And he wasn't moving.
937
00:51:24,647 --> 00:51:26,415
And then he'd
come out of it
938
00:51:26,449 --> 00:51:28,284
and he was so upset
with himself.
939
00:51:30,319 --> 00:51:32,355
There were other scenes
going on for him.
940
00:51:32,388 --> 00:51:35,225
There were other
ideas about us.
941
00:51:36,259 --> 00:51:37,627
What part of this is...
942
00:51:38,527 --> 00:51:39,529
is freewill?
943
00:51:40,596 --> 00:51:41,931
He had this awareness
944
00:51:41,964 --> 00:51:45,335
of what he was doing
and that pained him
945
00:51:45,368 --> 00:51:48,505
because he knew it wasn't us,
it wasn't right.
946
00:51:51,806 --> 00:51:53,743
There's that core
of that person
947
00:51:53,775 --> 00:51:56,279
that is still
completely maintained
948
00:51:56,311 --> 00:51:57,647
and they struggle
with this
949
00:51:57,679 --> 00:52:00,015
and they struggle
with how they're changing
950
00:52:00,049 --> 00:52:02,518
and, you know,
they often don't
951
00:52:02,551 --> 00:52:05,355
have a good logical
conclusion about it.
952
00:52:05,388 --> 00:52:06,523
So, it's very hard.
953
00:52:13,029 --> 00:52:16,833
Robin is, um,
not getting enough sleep.
954
00:52:16,866 --> 00:52:19,802
The therapists are like, "Not getting
sleep can be really dangerous."
955
00:52:21,971 --> 00:52:24,007
When we were told
to, um,
956
00:52:24,040 --> 00:52:26,610
to sleep apart because
he needed to get sleep
957
00:52:28,677 --> 00:52:31,513
he came to me
and he said...
958
00:52:31,547 --> 00:52:33,483
"Does this mean
we're separated?"
959
00:52:36,951 --> 00:52:39,622
For someone so brilliant
to say something like that.
960
00:52:40,855 --> 00:52:42,859
Such a mismatch
of reality.
961
00:52:45,060 --> 00:52:46,528
Five minutes later...
962
00:52:48,364 --> 00:52:49,932
he was back
963
00:52:49,964 --> 00:52:50,865
and he realized,
964
00:52:50,900 --> 00:52:52,969
no, we're in love
and we're married.
965
00:52:53,735 --> 00:52:54,737
There's no...
966
00:52:56,538 --> 00:52:57,674
I'm not leaving him.
967
00:53:01,844 --> 00:53:04,781
Robin was in
the house visiting and...
968
00:53:04,813 --> 00:53:07,417
he wanted me to look out
the back window,
969
00:53:07,449 --> 00:53:09,551
look at our boat dock
and our boats
970
00:53:09,585 --> 00:53:12,054
and get a different view.
971
00:53:13,522 --> 00:53:16,826
And so, he looked out
the back window,
972
00:53:16,859 --> 00:53:19,561
here, out of our sun room,
973
00:53:19,594 --> 00:53:21,964
he stood there
and stood there,
974
00:53:21,996 --> 00:53:24,032
and stood there
975
00:53:24,065 --> 00:53:29,471
for about 10-12 minutes
motionless.
976
00:53:29,505 --> 00:53:32,975
Didn't say a word.
Just stood there and looked.
977
00:53:33,007 --> 00:53:37,513
For the longest period
of time. Way too long.
978
00:53:37,545 --> 00:53:40,949
I finally said, "Robin,
let's go back outside."
979
00:53:48,723 --> 00:53:50,559
In the middle
of the storm,
980
00:53:51,659 --> 00:53:54,996
we kept trying to stay
in the center.
981
00:53:55,029 --> 00:53:57,999
By now though, we were seeing
the therapists every day,
982
00:53:58,032 --> 00:54:00,502
it's bike rides,
it's 12 step work.
983
00:54:00,536 --> 00:54:03,438
Meditating together
helped a little bit.
984
00:54:03,471 --> 00:54:06,408
We went to
a hypnotist at Stanford.
985
00:54:06,442 --> 00:54:08,644
And God bless the man,
he did everything.
986
00:54:08,677 --> 00:54:10,113
I would come in the room,
and he would be sitting there
987
00:54:10,145 --> 00:54:12,514
doing this thing
and it was part of the deal
988
00:54:12,547 --> 00:54:14,049
to like, hypnotize yourself.
989
00:54:15,016 --> 00:54:16,685
Kind of worked, a little bit.
990
00:54:16,719 --> 00:54:18,154
But it would always
be temporary.
991
00:54:18,186 --> 00:54:19,855
But he would keep trying.
992
00:54:20,755 --> 00:54:22,891
He was a freaking warrior.
993
00:54:22,924 --> 00:54:24,960
The way that he was able
994
00:54:24,993 --> 00:54:29,030
to battle the inner turmoils,
the inner fears.
995
00:54:29,063 --> 00:54:33,369
He was blessed with what
his heart was capable of,
996
00:54:34,170 --> 00:54:36,873
in the midst of fear.
997
00:54:36,906 --> 00:54:39,475
You go your whole life
never knowing how you look
998
00:54:39,507 --> 00:54:41,710
and then, there you are.
999
00:54:42,777 --> 00:54:44,580
You get hungry,
you get stupid,
1000
00:54:44,612 --> 00:54:46,081
you get shot
and die.
1001
00:54:46,114 --> 00:54:49,851
Then you get this quick glimpse
of how you look to others,
1002
00:54:49,884 --> 00:54:53,955
to the world around you.
It's never what you thought.
1003
00:54:53,989 --> 00:54:57,960
He could do what
nobody else could do.
1004
00:54:57,993 --> 00:55:01,431
He'd do what very few artists
have ever been able to do.
1005
00:55:01,464 --> 00:55:04,801
He was just...
he was beautiful.
1006
00:55:04,833 --> 00:55:08,136
I remember, the day
I found out I was thrilled.
1007
00:55:08,170 --> 00:55:10,206
Robin Williams is going
to come do
1008
00:55:10,239 --> 00:55:12,475
Bengal Tiger at
the Baghdad Zoo.
1009
00:55:12,507 --> 00:55:13,842
He's the tiger.
1010
00:55:14,909 --> 00:55:18,714
The fact is,
tigers are atheists.
1011
00:55:19,848 --> 00:55:21,750
All of us unabashed.
1012
00:55:21,784 --> 00:55:25,054
Heaven and Hell, these are
just metaphorical constructs
1013
00:55:25,087 --> 00:55:28,090
which represent hungry
and not hungry.
1014
00:55:28,123 --> 00:55:32,962
I would see him waiting
after the play,
1015
00:55:32,994 --> 00:55:35,697
after we'd come out from
a two hour and 20 minute show
1016
00:55:35,730 --> 00:55:38,633
and he's waiting for
every single person
1017
00:55:38,667 --> 00:55:41,536
to get their picture
and to sign their playbill.
1018
00:55:41,569 --> 00:55:44,906
And I learned patience,
and I learned compassion.
1019
00:55:44,940 --> 00:55:48,811
He's everything you want
from a fellow artist.
1020
00:55:48,844 --> 00:55:52,514
- Hey, Kellen.
- Looking hot in the green room.
1021
00:55:55,150 --> 00:55:58,821
He'd go in and extend
these mercy calls
1022
00:55:58,853 --> 00:56:01,089
to the comedians in
the green room.
1023
00:56:01,123 --> 00:56:03,726
They all looked upon
him as a hero,
1024
00:56:03,759 --> 00:56:06,862
and he's more than generous.
1025
00:56:06,895 --> 00:56:09,865
Wait, can we get you doing
the guy who hit our car today?
1026
00:56:09,898 --> 00:56:12,969
- Please?
- No! Dude! No.
1027
00:56:13,002 --> 00:56:16,505
- Nothing.
- Dude, you hit my rental car, man.
1028
00:56:16,538 --> 00:56:19,007
No, dude. I did but nothing happened.
1029
00:56:19,040 --> 00:56:21,643
- That was like before and nothing happened.
- That's so silly.
1030
00:56:21,677 --> 00:56:23,579
Do you have
insurance, maybe?
1031
00:56:23,612 --> 00:56:25,782
Oh, not at all, thanks.
1032
00:56:33,855 --> 00:56:35,857
That last
bike ride with Robin,
1033
00:56:35,891 --> 00:56:37,659
I asked him at the beginning
of the ride, "You look beat."
1034
00:56:37,692 --> 00:56:39,895
"Are you sure you're okay
for a ride? You look exhausted"
1035
00:56:39,929 --> 00:56:41,797
He said no, he needed it.
He really needed it
1036
00:56:41,830 --> 00:56:42,898
and was ready to do it.
1037
00:56:42,931 --> 00:56:43,933
But it was clear he was off,
1038
00:56:43,967 --> 00:56:46,569
off in a way he had not
ever been off before.
1039
00:56:46,601 --> 00:56:49,672
Much slimmer,
just sort of not there.
1040
00:56:51,639 --> 00:56:54,609
Couple of times he was over
in the lane way more than
1041
00:56:54,643 --> 00:56:58,114
he should have been. Way more
toward the center of the lane.
1042
00:56:58,147 --> 00:57:00,016
He asked
a lot of weird questions,
1043
00:57:00,049 --> 00:57:02,150
seemed oddly distracted.
1044
00:57:02,183 --> 00:57:06,321
Turned around and he'd say stuff
like, "What time you got, boss?"
1045
00:57:06,355 --> 00:57:08,958
Never asked me that on
a ride ever before.
1046
00:57:08,991 --> 00:57:12,194
I'd say, "I don't know, we left it
one, we're halfway through 1:30?"
1047
00:57:12,226 --> 00:57:13,862
"Thanks, boss."
1048
00:57:15,230 --> 00:57:18,902
Thirty seconds later.
"What time do you got, boss?"
1049
00:57:20,235 --> 00:57:23,806
Forty-five seconds later.
The same question again.
1050
00:57:23,839 --> 00:57:28,610
There were several other questions he
asked that were odd and didn't make sense.
1051
00:57:28,643 --> 00:57:32,814
Um, something along the lines, I think
we should maybe getting back and we took
1052
00:57:32,848 --> 00:57:36,118
one loop, we're getting back,
that kind of stuff.
1053
00:57:36,150 --> 00:57:39,688
Before you notice it,
he started to leave me,
1054
00:57:39,721 --> 00:57:42,725
he just was 20 yards
and then 40 then 100.
1055
00:57:42,757 --> 00:57:44,326
This has never happened
in the ride.
1056
00:57:44,360 --> 00:57:48,197
And all of a sudden he was a hundred
and some yards and I couldn't catch him.
1057
00:57:48,230 --> 00:57:50,666
I busted butt to catch up.
1058
00:57:50,699 --> 00:57:52,969
I couldn't do it.
But he pedaled all the way to the house,
1059
00:57:53,002 --> 00:57:54,137
and we get to the house
and he said,
1060
00:57:54,170 --> 00:57:57,106
"Hope you don't mind, boss,
but I got to get in today.
1061
00:57:57,139 --> 00:57:59,309
"I got stuff to do." And I said,
"Fine." And he hustled in the house.
1062
00:58:15,757 --> 00:58:20,895
Uncharacteristically,
around 9:30 in the evening,
1063
00:58:20,929 --> 00:58:27,670
Carol noticed Robin and
Leonard standing out front,
1064
00:58:27,703 --> 00:58:34,677
I went outside and I asked
if everything was okay.
1065
00:58:34,710 --> 00:58:38,947
And he said, "Yes, I'm okay."
1066
00:58:38,980 --> 00:58:41,249
Just sort of a pat answer.
1067
00:58:41,282 --> 00:58:45,654
And then he said,
"Boss, I really need a hug."
1068
00:58:46,388 --> 00:58:49,958
And so I gave him a hug.
1069
00:58:49,991 --> 00:58:56,197
And he started to cry at
that point, put his head down.
1070
00:58:56,230 --> 00:58:59,701
So I put my arm around
his shoulder, but then
1071
00:58:59,735 --> 00:59:03,205
I asked him, "Robin, Robin,
are you okay?
1072
00:59:03,237 --> 00:59:06,875
"Is anything wrong
that I could help?
1073
00:59:06,909 --> 00:59:08,244
"Are you in pain?"
1074
00:59:08,277 --> 00:59:12,114
He said, uh, "No, boss."
1075
00:59:12,147 --> 00:59:17,253
He talked about family
and what was going on
1076
00:59:17,286 --> 00:59:21,357
in his life and some
things that
1077
00:59:21,389 --> 00:59:25,694
I think he felt I would
keep private.
1078
00:59:27,228 --> 00:59:32,132
It took about 15 minutes.
He said, "Bye, boss."
1079
00:59:32,134 --> 00:59:34,170
I said, "I'll see you tomorrow."
1080
00:59:34,203 --> 00:59:37,907
And he walked home.
1081
00:59:41,810 --> 00:59:44,313
We were going to try and
get to bed at a decent hour.
1082
00:59:44,346 --> 00:59:48,985
And we stayed up for a little while,
which is what we did that week.
1083
00:59:50,052 --> 00:59:52,154
When sleeping apart it's like,
well,
1084
00:59:52,186 --> 00:59:55,924
we'd stay in our bed together
until it was time to go to sleep.
1085
00:59:55,958 --> 01:00:01,230
Again, I'd read to him,
then it was just time for sleep
1086
01:00:01,263 --> 01:00:05,500
and he, uh...
he went into his office,
1087
01:00:05,534 --> 01:00:09,338
which is right by our room and he went
back there a couple of times to get things,
1088
01:00:09,371 --> 01:00:12,273
and I saw he had his iPad
and I thought,
1089
01:00:12,306 --> 01:00:16,011
"This is really good because
he hasn't wanted to read
1090
01:00:16,043 --> 01:00:20,949
"or do any, you know,
anything in a long time."
1091
01:00:20,982 --> 01:00:24,385
We just said good night to each other.
"Good night, my love."
1092
01:00:24,418 --> 01:00:26,822
"Good night, my love."
1093
01:00:36,397 --> 01:00:38,800
We'd been meditating
every morning together.
1094
01:00:38,833 --> 01:00:42,971
So, when I got up
and he wasn't up yet,
1095
01:00:43,005 --> 01:00:45,141
I thought, "Oh my God,
the door's still closed.
1096
01:00:45,174 --> 01:00:50,780
"He's sleeping, he's sleeping,
this is really good."
1097
01:00:50,813 --> 01:00:54,150
His assistant showed up because
they had some work stuff to go over
1098
01:00:54,183 --> 01:00:57,186
and I had to take off
and I just told her, I said,
1099
01:00:57,219 --> 01:00:59,755
you know, "Just text me
when he's awake."
1100
01:01:01,255 --> 01:01:02,891
Apparently he had
slept in.
1101
01:01:02,924 --> 01:01:07,562
And they couldn't figure out why he was
sleeping in because it wasn't him. Right?
1102
01:01:07,596 --> 01:01:10,166
And they tried to go in
the room and it was locked.
1103
01:01:11,900 --> 01:01:14,070
Then I got a text saying...
1104
01:01:15,270 --> 01:01:20,476
"He's not up,
what should I do?"
1105
01:01:20,509 --> 01:01:27,049
I knew... I just knew there
was something terribly, terribly wrong,
1106
01:01:27,081 --> 01:01:30,051
that wasn't right,
and I just texted,
1107
01:01:30,085 --> 01:01:33,456
"Wake him up immediately
and call me back."
1108
01:01:38,493 --> 01:01:40,429
She called me back.
1109
01:01:48,103 --> 01:01:50,172
Susan had just come back.
1110
01:01:50,205 --> 01:01:54,310
Dan and Rebecca were outside
the house.
1111
01:01:54,342 --> 01:01:58,047
The police were showing up and
they didn't know what was going on.
1112
01:02:00,882 --> 01:02:03,484
Sister came in the
kitchen and said, "How are you?"
1113
01:02:03,518 --> 01:02:06,222
And I said, "I'm fine." She goes, "Oh,
so you... Oh my God, you don't know?"
1114
01:02:06,255 --> 01:02:08,390
And then she told me, you know.
1115
01:02:08,422 --> 01:02:11,893
I was just sitting
with a tsunami of grief.
1116
01:02:15,630 --> 01:02:20,969
I'm driving back, on this day
three years ago. And a reporter
1117
01:02:21,002 --> 01:02:24,539
from a tabloid called me
on my phone.
1118
01:02:24,572 --> 01:02:27,243
I don't even know how
they got my number.
1119
01:02:27,275 --> 01:02:29,611
And they said, "Do you have
any comments about the death
1120
01:02:29,645 --> 01:02:33,415
"of your friend, Robin Williams,
by suicide?"
1121
01:02:33,447 --> 01:02:37,485
And I threw my goddamned phone
across the car and kept driving.
1122
01:02:39,654 --> 01:02:43,424
I remember very distinctly,
we were standing out front
1123
01:02:43,458 --> 01:02:47,596
and you could hear
a helicopter coming.
1124
01:02:47,628 --> 01:02:50,333
He said, "Okay, here they come."
1125
01:02:53,335 --> 01:02:55,404
The whole Bay Area
felt like a sledge hammer
1126
01:02:55,436 --> 01:02:59,141
hit it in the head that day and New
York too and Hollywood and everywhere.
1127
01:02:59,174 --> 01:03:02,210
It was like a war zone,
helicopter circling,
1128
01:03:02,243 --> 01:03:04,979
news vans pulling up their
big satellite dishes
1129
01:03:05,013 --> 01:03:06,482
and they're all setting up
cameras.
1130
01:03:06,514 --> 01:03:09,183
They're knocking on our
door asking for comment.
1131
01:03:09,217 --> 01:03:11,320
It got pretty crazy
around here.
1132
01:03:11,353 --> 01:03:16,992
The global media descended
on this little cul-de-sac.
1133
01:03:17,025 --> 01:03:19,161
How everybody just wanted
their piece.
1134
01:03:21,529 --> 01:03:26,467
We felt that it was
a huge invasion of privacy.
1135
01:03:26,500 --> 01:03:31,339
This was a horrifically
tragic event to happen
1136
01:03:31,373 --> 01:03:34,911
to normal
people that are our neighbors.
1137
01:03:38,480 --> 01:03:41,417
We also had fans
of Robin's
1138
01:03:41,449 --> 01:03:43,685
that just wanted to come
and pay tribute
1139
01:03:43,719 --> 01:03:48,357
and they would stand peacefully
in front of his house and lay
1140
01:03:48,389 --> 01:03:52,161
flowers down and just
pay their respects.
1141
01:03:56,264 --> 01:04:00,035
You know, it's like really
having...
1142
01:04:00,067 --> 01:04:05,107
a limb or something ripped from you
and you can't heal it right away.
1143
01:04:14,715 --> 01:04:20,022
I remember walking out of that
facility down the steps outside
1144
01:04:20,054 --> 01:04:24,426
and feeling the last year
and a half
1145
01:04:24,458 --> 01:04:30,031
of really hard work that my
husband and I went through.
1146
01:04:30,065 --> 01:04:32,969
I had the beginning
of an answer.
1147
01:04:34,268 --> 01:04:38,006
I started digging in
for about the next year.
1148
01:05:05,132 --> 01:05:08,203
You can't come back
from Lewy Body Dementia.
1149
01:05:08,235 --> 01:05:11,306
There is no cure. Depression,
you can come back from.
1150
01:05:11,339 --> 01:05:14,310
He had come back
from that earlier in life.
1151
01:05:15,743 --> 01:05:19,747
Clumsy as it was, not in the right
state of mind due to the tricks
1152
01:05:19,781 --> 01:05:24,686
that the disease plays on you and
the lack of sleep and everything.
1153
01:05:24,719 --> 01:05:28,791
But I think he just probably
somewhere in his brain has decided,
1154
01:05:30,324 --> 01:05:32,261
"I don't want to bring
everybody down with me.
1155
01:05:32,293 --> 01:05:34,797
"I don't want to spend a year
or two going down this path."
1156
01:05:34,830 --> 01:05:37,732
Maybe he didn't have quite that level
of consciousness. But knowing Robin,
1157
01:05:37,766 --> 01:05:40,601
"I want to ride my bike. I want to be with
my beautiful wife. I want to do comedy."
1158
01:05:40,634 --> 01:05:46,808
These things will probably all be
off the books in a very short time.
1159
01:05:46,842 --> 01:05:49,311
I just know that
he finally one day said,
1160
01:05:49,344 --> 01:05:50,846
"I'm not going to go where
this is taking me."
1161
01:05:50,878 --> 01:05:55,083
But he's just so joyous. And then
there would've been no joy in his life.
1162
01:05:56,250 --> 01:05:59,687
No, he wasn't ready to go.
He wasn't ready to go at all.
1163
01:05:59,721 --> 01:06:03,692
And he stuck around longer than he
felt like it. I mean, I just know him
1164
01:06:03,725 --> 01:06:08,831
because he wasn't ready to say
goodbye to Susan or to life.
1165
01:06:08,864 --> 01:06:15,270
You know, when someone gets sick
like that because it's so confusing.
1166
01:06:15,302 --> 01:06:18,239
It's not their heart
that's sick.
1167
01:06:18,272 --> 01:06:20,808
It's the mainframe,
it's the computer,
1168
01:06:20,842 --> 01:06:24,646
and that's very different,
1169
01:06:24,679 --> 01:06:26,715
very different.
1170
01:06:29,618 --> 01:06:33,554
Lewy body gives
nobody a chance to prepare.
1171
01:06:33,587 --> 01:06:39,393
The psychiatry is the disease. It's the
manifestation of the disease in the brain stem.
1172
01:06:39,427 --> 01:06:42,564
I think in this country,
this is a big problem, that mental health
1173
01:06:42,596 --> 01:06:45,234
and neurology are seen
as separate.
1174
01:06:45,266 --> 01:06:48,469
In fact, it's all
abnormalities of brain circuits
1175
01:06:48,502 --> 01:06:55,243
when your brain is not functioning to
allow you to be a fulfilled human being.
1176
01:06:55,277 --> 01:06:58,813
So there's a tendency
to blame people for their behaviors
1177
01:06:58,846 --> 01:07:02,717
and their illness,
and a certain mindset around disease
1178
01:07:02,750 --> 01:07:06,154
that people are responsible for
their own disease. They aren't.
1179
01:07:06,188 --> 01:07:09,925
I think there's a blame-free world,
just like when someone has cancer,
1180
01:07:09,958 --> 01:07:11,160
no blame.
1181
01:07:28,643 --> 01:07:32,313
Robin Williams' widow is speaking
out about the beloved comedian's...
1182
01:07:32,346 --> 01:07:34,649
Speaking out for the first
time since he took his life...
1183
01:07:34,683 --> 01:07:36,851
Susan Williams is breaking
her silence.
1184
01:07:36,884 --> 01:07:39,888
It's been a year since his death. I see
you're still wearing your wedding ring.
1185
01:07:39,920 --> 01:07:41,790
- How're you doing?
- I'm doing okay.
1186
01:07:41,822 --> 01:07:43,725
It's been a year of grieving.
1187
01:07:43,757 --> 01:07:45,826
Uh, and it's been
a year of
1188
01:07:45,860 --> 01:07:47,796
really trying to get to the
bottom of what killed my husband.
1189
01:07:47,828 --> 01:07:50,898
Susan Schneider Williams wrote
an editorial for the journal Neurology...
1190
01:07:50,931 --> 01:07:54,669
For her first TV interview since
writing about Robin's health struggles.
1191
01:07:54,703 --> 01:07:58,340
People think your husband killed
himself because he was depressed.
1192
01:07:58,373 --> 01:08:00,576
Everyone thought that he died
from suicide,
1193
01:08:00,609 --> 01:08:02,411
from depression.
But that wasn't the case?
1194
01:08:02,444 --> 01:08:04,913
No, Robin did not die
from depression.
1195
01:08:04,946 --> 01:08:11,420
Robin had a deadly disease
and it's called Lewy Body Dementia.
1196
01:08:11,453 --> 01:08:13,889
Everybody deals
with grief in their own way.
1197
01:08:17,025 --> 01:08:19,795
The part that needs
the focus and attention is,
1198
01:08:19,828 --> 01:08:23,764
let's cure this disease.
No one should have to go through that.
1199
01:08:23,798 --> 01:08:28,237
No one should have to feel the
level of pain that Robin felt.
1200
01:08:28,270 --> 01:08:31,540
And he's one of millions.
1201
01:08:31,572 --> 01:08:33,475
But what she's done,
is educating
1202
01:08:33,508 --> 01:08:36,878
everyone that cares to know
what really happened,
1203
01:08:36,910 --> 01:08:38,645
the real story about
his last year.
1204
01:08:38,679 --> 01:08:42,985
Autopsy reports diagnosed
Williams with diffuse Lewy Body Dementia.
1205
01:08:43,017 --> 01:08:44,752
Lewy Body Dementia.
1206
01:08:44,786 --> 01:08:48,289
To a form of dementia,
he had what's known as Lewy Body Dementia.
1207
01:08:48,322 --> 01:08:51,860
Which was
discovered only after his death.
1208
01:08:51,892 --> 01:08:55,596
When you don't have a
diagnosis and you're going down
1209
01:08:55,629 --> 01:09:00,668
these trails of trying to find out
what's going on, that is scary.
1210
01:09:00,701 --> 01:09:03,004
The terror of where's
this coming from?
1211
01:09:03,038 --> 01:09:06,907
Robin asked, "Do I have
dementia,
1212
01:09:06,941 --> 01:09:09,511
"am I schizophrenic?"
1213
01:09:09,544 --> 01:09:13,282
And okay now, right?
Is that clear or not?
1214
01:09:13,315 --> 01:09:14,782
This is what other families
are going through.
1215
01:09:14,816 --> 01:09:17,486
An example of what's
going on in many of these lives.
1216
01:09:19,486 --> 01:09:20,822
Having a diagnosis...
1217
01:09:21,923 --> 01:09:23,759
would've meant everything.
1218
01:09:27,395 --> 01:09:31,066
Doing the press
for that last movie was really,
1219
01:09:31,098 --> 01:09:34,703
I mean, it was very
complicated emotionally
1220
01:09:34,736 --> 01:09:38,674
and to be really blunt,
I'm really proud of the fact that
1221
01:09:38,706 --> 01:09:41,310
there were 200 people
on that set every day,
1222
01:09:41,343 --> 01:09:42,778
and not one of them
1223
01:09:42,811 --> 01:09:48,784
spoke to anyone ever about the
struggles we saw Robin enduring.
1224
01:09:48,816 --> 01:09:52,887
But it no longer feels loyal
to be silent about it,
1225
01:09:52,920 --> 01:09:56,891
but maybe more loyal
to share without shame,
1226
01:09:56,924 --> 01:10:01,562
without secrecy that,
yeah, this guy was hurting.
1227
01:10:01,596 --> 01:10:04,532
He was going through something
that he didn't have a name for yet.
1228
01:10:04,566 --> 01:10:08,970
And it doesn't bring Robin
back, but it does give clarity.
1229
01:10:09,003 --> 01:10:12,840
Because a completely
new variable was entered
1230
01:10:12,874 --> 01:10:17,478
late into the equation of Robin
Williams' life, which ended his life.
1231
01:10:17,512 --> 01:10:20,749
The Robin that we watched
all those years,
1232
01:10:20,781 --> 01:10:22,984
the man who put himself
out there,
1233
01:10:23,017 --> 01:10:26,355
the man who went overseas
to entertain troops,
1234
01:10:26,387 --> 01:10:30,057
the man who would entertain
the crews on the sets,
1235
01:10:30,090 --> 01:10:33,995
the man who would hug
and hold on to his friends.
1236
01:10:34,027 --> 01:10:35,731
That was very real.
1237
01:10:43,804 --> 01:10:48,976
After he left, in his
bedside table there was a few items,
1238
01:10:49,009 --> 01:10:54,048
just a few things. And every once in a
while, I would pull that drawer open,
1239
01:10:54,081 --> 01:10:57,651
um...
1240
01:10:57,685 --> 01:11:01,589
when I missed him,
and just wanted him to tell me something.
1241
01:11:03,157 --> 01:11:05,727
I opened up that book
and I was like, "Wow."
1242
01:11:13,034 --> 01:11:17,873
And I remember that when we were
talking about what we wanted to
1243
01:11:17,905 --> 01:11:22,510
be able to leave
as our legacy.
1244
01:11:22,544 --> 01:11:27,883
And for Robin, it was that, that he
wanted to help people be less afraid.
1245
01:11:40,061 --> 01:11:44,965
When you get to know Robin,
just as our friend and our neighbor,
1246
01:11:44,999 --> 01:11:47,469
like all of us knew him.
1247
01:11:47,502 --> 01:11:50,105
That's one thing. But when you
actually, there's a realization
1248
01:11:50,137 --> 01:11:55,510
about the impact that he
had on a global basis.
1249
01:12:07,155 --> 01:12:10,992
The last scene for the
Night at the Museum franchise
1250
01:12:11,025 --> 01:12:14,596
is Robin and Ben Stiller
saying goodbye,
1251
01:12:14,629 --> 01:12:18,500
and knowing that they are probably
not going to see each other again.
1252
01:12:18,532 --> 01:12:20,701
That was the scene.
1253
01:12:20,735 --> 01:12:23,906
We didn't realize that
that was real life.
1254
01:12:25,673 --> 01:12:28,109
It's time for your
next adventure.
1255
01:12:28,142 --> 01:12:30,212
I have no idea what
I'm going to do tomorrow.
1256
01:12:30,245 --> 01:12:32,815
How exciting.
1257
01:12:39,187 --> 01:12:41,923
Goodbye, Teddy.
1258
01:12:41,955 --> 01:12:44,659
Farewell, Lawrence.
1259
01:12:48,262 --> 01:12:50,965
If you
saw his movies,
1260
01:12:50,999 --> 01:12:57,239
Robin's movies, you saw
one side of Robin.
1261
01:12:57,271 --> 01:13:00,609
But the biggest blessing
is who he was as a human being.
1262
01:13:03,745 --> 01:13:08,282
He was a loving soul
and that was who he was.
1263
01:13:08,316 --> 01:13:10,519
He was totally open, you know.
1264
01:13:12,920 --> 01:13:15,624
And he understood
the bigness of love.
1265
01:13:18,058 --> 01:13:22,096
Oh, man. This guy, I mean,
I feel him around all the time.
1266
01:13:22,129 --> 01:13:24,565
There'll be a moment when
I just burst out laughing.
1267
01:13:24,598 --> 01:13:27,636
I hear his voice
in my ear.
1268
01:13:27,669 --> 01:13:30,305
It's just one of the joys
of my life, if not the,
1269
01:13:30,338 --> 01:13:32,040
I mean, that was the best
friend I ever had.
1270
01:13:32,072 --> 01:13:34,942
You know what I mean?
Truly, it was just the time.
1271
01:13:34,976 --> 01:13:36,844
It was the ride
of a life, man
1272
01:13:38,713 --> 01:13:42,117
I just love
him so much.
1273
01:13:53,727 --> 01:13:55,797
Yeah, there's a sadness
and then you have to go.
1274
01:13:55,829 --> 01:14:00,034
Then there's also hope.
Sadness, it's always like
1275
01:14:00,067 --> 01:14:02,670
you wish they hadn't
happened, but they did.
1276
01:14:02,704 --> 01:14:04,272
And the purpose is
to make you different.
1277
01:14:04,304 --> 01:14:06,575
It's what they call
the Buddhist gift.
1278
01:14:06,607 --> 01:14:08,810
It's that idea of
1279
01:14:08,843 --> 01:14:13,014
you're back and you realize the
thing that matters are others,
1280
01:14:13,047 --> 01:14:15,215
way beyond yourself.
1281
01:14:15,249 --> 01:14:18,954
Self goes away,
ego bye-bye.
1282
01:14:18,986 --> 01:14:22,190
You realize there are a lot
of amazing people out there
1283
01:14:22,222 --> 01:14:24,926
to be grateful for,
and a loving God.
1284
01:14:24,959 --> 01:14:28,129
Other than that,
good luck.
1285
01:14:28,161 --> 01:14:30,031
That's what
life is about.
1286
01:14:57,154 --> 01:15:02,154
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