1 00:00:00,867 --> 00:00:03,403 [music] 2 00:00:03,403 --> 00:00:05,505 So let, let me get this straight. 3 00:00:05,505 --> 00:00:09,142 So you're saying that the Lord put me on your heart 4 00:00:09,142 --> 00:00:11,611 to help me with my campaign? 5 00:00:11,611 --> 00:00:12,912 Ha ha! 6 00:00:12,912 --> 00:00:15,248 Honey, yes, I accept! 7 00:00:15,248 --> 00:00:17,083 I'm not turnin' down no blessing! 8 00:00:17,083 --> 00:00:19,352 [laughs] Thank you so much! 9 00:00:19,352 --> 00:00:21,221 I look forward to it! Bye bye! 10 00:00:21,221 --> 00:00:22,856 Oh my goodness! 11 00:00:22,856 --> 00:00:24,591 Ooh, let's see! 12 00:00:24,591 --> 00:00:26,126 Hm...yeah... 13 00:00:26,126 --> 00:00:27,861 All right! 14 00:00:27,861 --> 00:00:29,662 Oh! 15 00:00:29,662 --> 00:00:31,164 I got some moves! 16 00:00:31,164 --> 00:00:32,732 What's up with this unspeakable joy? 17 00:00:32,732 --> 00:00:34,134 And these unspeakable dance moves, girl? 18 00:00:34,134 --> 00:00:35,201 Oh, my God! 19 00:00:35,201 --> 00:00:36,636 -Look, I'm so excited. -What? 20 00:00:36,636 --> 00:00:40,240 That was Donna LaRue, my new bestie. 21 00:00:40,240 --> 00:00:41,474 -[Leha] Okay. -She's new in town, 22 00:00:41,474 --> 00:00:43,009 -and she's new to the church. -Okay. 23 00:00:43,009 --> 00:00:44,477 She gonna help me with my campaign. 24 00:00:44,477 --> 00:00:46,246 She wanna help me be president 25 00:00:46,246 --> 00:00:48,348 of the church's board of directors. 26 00:00:48,348 --> 00:00:50,316 Ha ha! 27 00:00:50,316 --> 00:00:51,618 -Girl! -[excited cheering] 28 00:00:51,618 --> 00:00:53,186 Only one person could make me lose control 29 00:00:53,186 --> 00:00:54,788 -of my body like that. -Who? 30 00:00:54,788 --> 00:00:56,289 Willie Jenkins. 31 00:00:56,289 --> 00:00:58,124 -[Cora laughing] -He taught a dance class 32 00:00:58,124 --> 00:01:00,727 in the back of a chicken joint in the '70s. 33 00:01:00,727 --> 00:01:04,197 Had me limber like a chicken wing with mild sauce. 34 00:01:04,197 --> 00:01:06,132 [laughter] 35 00:01:06,132 --> 00:01:08,301 Oh my goodness! 36 00:01:08,301 --> 00:01:09,702 Okay, hold on, now. 37 00:01:09,702 --> 00:01:12,972 Is this Donna LaRue of the LaRue Cookie chain? 38 00:01:12,972 --> 00:01:15,375 Oh my goodness, the one who makes those, 39 00:01:15,375 --> 00:01:19,612 ooh, uh, uh, uh, shortbread butter pecan cream cheese-- 40 00:01:19,612 --> 00:01:23,850 oh my goodness--apple fritter pound cake cookies? 41 00:01:23,850 --> 00:01:25,218 Yes, that's her, that's her. 42 00:01:25,218 --> 00:01:26,286 I think I just gained 10 pounds. 43 00:01:26,286 --> 00:01:27,320 [women laughing] 44 00:01:27,320 --> 00:01:28,655 It did not stop at ten. 45 00:01:28,655 --> 00:01:31,324 That's my new bestie. That is my new bestie. 46 00:01:31,324 --> 00:01:34,761 But the thing is, is I love that she's a successful woman 47 00:01:34,761 --> 00:01:37,230 and she's willing to elevate another woman. 48 00:01:37,230 --> 00:01:38,398 Isn't that nice? 49 00:01:38,398 --> 00:01:41,468 Doesn't hurt that she's rich too. 50 00:01:41,468 --> 00:01:44,103 Well, I'm not checking into her riches or nothing, you know? 51 00:01:44,103 --> 00:01:45,572 Oh, let me check for you, dear. 52 00:01:45,572 --> 00:01:47,874 I'll look her up on, uh, Old, Young, 53 00:01:47,874 --> 00:01:50,076 Gifted, Black and Rich website. 54 00:01:50,076 --> 00:01:51,377 You know what? 55 00:01:51,377 --> 00:01:53,346 It's not even about the money, Ms. Anastasia. 56 00:01:53,346 --> 00:01:57,016 It's about us as Black women just elevating each other 57 00:01:57,016 --> 00:01:59,919 and lifting each other up and encouraging each other. 58 00:01:59,919 --> 00:02:01,087 That's what it's all about! 59 00:02:01,087 --> 00:02:02,589 You are so right, Cora. So right. 60 00:02:02,589 --> 00:02:06,659 Now, come on, now, Ms. Future Madam President! 61 00:02:06,659 --> 00:02:07,560 [laughter] 62 00:02:07,560 --> 00:02:08,761 Ooh, wait! Now, hold on. 63 00:02:08,761 --> 00:02:10,196 Other than giving us some free cookies, 64 00:02:10,196 --> 00:02:11,698 now what's your first order of business? 65 00:02:11,698 --> 00:02:15,768 My first order of business for my upcoming campaign event 66 00:02:15,768 --> 00:02:20,874 is to take down that opponent of mine, that Lyin' Louise. 67 00:02:20,874 --> 00:02:23,710 Okay, well, so much for lifting each other up. 68 00:02:23,710 --> 00:02:25,211 Now I'm intrigued. 69 00:02:25,211 --> 00:02:27,247 Why is she called Lying Louise? 70 00:02:27,247 --> 00:02:31,117 'Cause her name is Louise and she's always lying. 71 00:02:31,117 --> 00:02:32,352 Wait a minute, now. 72 00:02:32,352 --> 00:02:34,521 Is that the one who brought those Mattie pies 73 00:02:34,521 --> 00:02:35,655 to the church bake sale 74 00:02:35,655 --> 00:02:37,156 and tried to pass them off as her own? 75 00:02:37,156 --> 00:02:38,358 -Mm-hmm. -Oh! 76 00:02:38,358 --> 00:02:40,393 Yep, yes, it is. That, that is her. 77 00:02:40,393 --> 00:02:42,729 How she gonna do Miss Mattie Mabel like that 78 00:02:42,729 --> 00:02:44,230 and her Mattie pies? 79 00:02:44,230 --> 00:02:46,065 Isn't that sad? That's terrible! 80 00:02:46,065 --> 00:02:47,467 You know what? Ladies, hold on. 81 00:02:47,467 --> 00:02:48,668 Speaking of sweets, 82 00:02:48,668 --> 00:02:50,069 we need to, uh, do something nice, 83 00:02:50,069 --> 00:02:51,638 like a fruit basket or something 84 00:02:51,638 --> 00:02:54,641 for the assisted facility across the street. 85 00:02:54,641 --> 00:02:56,476 They've been having some break-ins. 86 00:02:56,476 --> 00:02:59,012 Yes, I heard about that, and that is terrible. 87 00:02:59,012 --> 00:03:02,415 That explains why Mr. Brown bought the case of pepper spray 88 00:03:02,415 --> 00:03:04,350 and a box of tasers and signed us all up 89 00:03:04,350 --> 00:03:05,885 for self-defense classes. 90 00:03:05,885 --> 00:03:08,655 Mm-hmm, 'cause that Louise is gonna need some self-defense. 91 00:03:08,655 --> 00:03:10,056 Uh oh! 92 00:03:10,056 --> 00:03:12,125 After I bring her this beatdown from this campaign! 93 00:03:12,125 --> 00:03:15,461 [cheering] 94 00:03:15,461 --> 00:03:16,496 Yeaa, boo! [indistinct]. I'm like, come on, baby! 95 00:03:16,496 --> 00:03:18,464 I've got it! I've got it! 96 00:03:19,808 --> 00:03:21,209 [theme music] 97 00:03:21,209 --> 00:03:23,511 ♪ No matter what you do, I love you ♪ 98 00:03:23,511 --> 00:03:27,282 ♪ No matter where you go, I'm behind you for sure ♪ 99 00:03:27,282 --> 00:03:30,185 ♪ Always remember, blood ain't never water ♪ 100 00:03:30,185 --> 00:03:32,754 ♪ We'll make it if we stay together ♪ 101 00:03:34,923 --> 00:03:37,058 [music] Oh, there you go. 102 00:03:37,058 --> 00:03:38,726 Cora, did anybody call you from the Senior Men's Choir yet? 103 00:03:38,726 --> 00:03:40,228 No, why would they be calling me? 104 00:03:40,228 --> 00:03:42,831 Uh, as the new president of the board, 105 00:03:42,831 --> 00:03:45,233 we're gonna need you to, uh, authorize the funds 106 00:03:45,233 --> 00:03:46,468 for us to do our new mixtape. 107 00:03:46,468 --> 00:03:48,670 -Don't start that, Mr. Brown. -What? 108 00:03:48,670 --> 00:03:50,538 Cora, we need to lay down some new tracks. 109 00:03:50,538 --> 00:03:52,507 Ever since we let Brother Jameson go, 110 00:03:52,507 --> 00:03:54,576 we gotta lay down a new mixtape 'cause 111 00:03:54,576 --> 00:03:56,444 his oversized dentures used to be whistling 112 00:03:56,444 --> 00:03:57,645 on all the other tracks. 113 00:03:57,645 --> 00:03:58,913 He would sing-- 114 00:03:58,913 --> 00:04:01,483 ♪ Ama-[whistle]-zing [whistle] grace ♪ 115 00:04:01,483 --> 00:04:03,952 ♪ How [whistle] sweet the sound ♪ 116 00:04:03,952 --> 00:04:05,353 -[Cora] Mr. Brown! -Messed up all the tracks. 117 00:04:05,353 --> 00:04:06,721 That is terrible! Don't do that. 118 00:04:06,721 --> 00:04:09,057 And don't have nobody else calling me, Mr. Brown! 119 00:04:09,057 --> 00:04:10,758 That's not proper protocol. 120 00:04:10,758 --> 00:04:12,660 I haven't even won the election yet! 121 00:04:12,660 --> 00:04:14,329 Oh, Cora, you know you're gonna win. 122 00:04:14,329 --> 00:04:16,464 And I know everybody, everybody know you gonna win. 123 00:04:16,464 --> 00:04:18,333 You gonna win that by a mudslide. 124 00:04:18,333 --> 00:04:20,368 I think you mean landslide. 125 00:04:20,368 --> 00:04:22,604 -Regardless... -Yes, whatever. 126 00:04:22,604 --> 00:04:25,006 What needs to be protected is the democratic process 127 00:04:25,006 --> 00:04:26,574 must have her way and be protected 128 00:04:26,574 --> 00:04:28,610 from voter suppression and subversion 129 00:04:28,610 --> 00:04:31,346 by unscrupulous constituents... 130 00:04:31,346 --> 00:04:32,747 -Mm. -Who you callin' consti-- 131 00:04:32,747 --> 00:04:35,083 You lookin' at me, callin' me a "constitch"? 132 00:04:35,083 --> 00:04:38,253 -Cora, I ain't no constitch. -Mr. Brown, don't do that. 133 00:04:38,253 --> 00:04:40,955 No, Mr. Reginald. You know, the thing is, 134 00:04:40,955 --> 00:04:42,924 -if I win this election, -Hmm. 135 00:04:42,924 --> 00:04:44,025 I wanna make a difference-- 136 00:04:44,025 --> 00:04:46,594 to my community, to my church. 137 00:04:46,594 --> 00:04:49,497 You know, you've been in a powerful position before. 138 00:04:49,497 --> 00:04:51,366 Can you just give me some pointers? 139 00:04:51,366 --> 00:04:53,401 -Give me some tips? -[sighs] 140 00:04:53,401 --> 00:04:55,970 Much of the success of an office 141 00:04:55,970 --> 00:04:59,507 rests on the character of the person who holds it. 142 00:04:59,507 --> 00:05:04,579 Now, you just choose to do the best for all involved, 143 00:05:04,579 --> 00:05:06,781 -and you'll do fine. -Thank you, Mr. Reginald. 144 00:05:06,781 --> 00:05:08,816 That was sweet. That was nice. 145 00:05:08,816 --> 00:05:10,652 That's why you was in a powerful position. 146 00:05:10,652 --> 00:05:12,687 -[laughing] -[phone chiming] 147 00:05:12,687 --> 00:05:14,455 -[Mr. Brown] Uh, Cora? -What? 148 00:05:14,455 --> 00:05:15,823 Your phone is blowing up over here. 149 00:05:15,823 --> 00:05:16,891 What, it is? 150 00:05:16,891 --> 00:05:18,626 You don't got a new man or something? 151 00:05:18,626 --> 00:05:20,128 No, Mr. Brown! I don't have no new man. 152 00:05:20,128 --> 00:05:21,729 My phone blowing up now. 153 00:05:21,729 --> 00:05:25,233 What is everybody talking about? 154 00:05:25,233 --> 00:05:27,201 What?1 I missed my campaign event? 155 00:05:27,201 --> 00:05:29,671 Mr. Brown, look, my campaign thing 156 00:05:29,671 --> 00:05:31,472 is not for another two days. 157 00:05:31,472 --> 00:05:32,907 See, see? Look at this invitation. 158 00:05:32,907 --> 00:05:35,009 It say, "The Women of Distinction Brunch 159 00:05:35,009 --> 00:05:36,444 with Cora Simmons..." 160 00:05:36,444 --> 00:05:38,179 [Both] Is today!? 161 00:05:38,179 --> 00:05:40,281 Oh! What? What are they talking about? 162 00:05:40,281 --> 00:05:41,616 Cora, you missed your event! 163 00:05:41,616 --> 00:05:43,117 -No I-- -You a liar, you gotta-- 164 00:05:43,117 --> 00:05:44,519 -Come on, Cora, fix your hair! -Wait a minute! Wait a minute! 165 00:05:44,519 --> 00:05:45,720 Do your makeup! 166 00:05:45,720 --> 00:05:47,021 No, matter of fact, don't do your makeup. 167 00:05:47,021 --> 00:05:48,289 I'll do it. Come on, Cora! 168 00:05:48,289 --> 00:05:49,457 No, we gotta go, go-- 169 00:05:49,457 --> 00:05:52,293 Wait, wait, wait! What are you doing? 170 00:05:52,293 --> 00:05:53,595 You get the door, I'll drive! 171 00:05:53,595 --> 00:05:54,729 -[everyone shouting] -What is going on? 172 00:05:54,729 --> 00:05:56,564 -Oh my god! -What's going on? 173 00:05:56,564 --> 00:05:57,432 [chuckles] It's alright, sit down. 174 00:05:57,432 --> 00:05:59,367 Cora missed the event! 175 00:05:59,367 --> 00:06:01,069 She not gonna be president. 176 00:06:01,069 --> 00:06:05,006 No, my campaign thing-- they said--the people that-- 177 00:06:05,006 --> 00:06:08,176 the invitation said that they went to the... 178 00:06:08,176 --> 00:06:09,677 They went to the event, and they, 179 00:06:09,677 --> 00:06:11,679 they realized that there wasn't an event, 180 00:06:11,679 --> 00:06:14,215 and everybody came and left, Mr. Brown! 181 00:06:14,215 --> 00:06:15,950 Maybe they'll "impeachech" you. 182 00:06:18,152 --> 00:06:19,621 How could somebody do this? 183 00:06:20,188 --> 00:06:21,723 No. Now, that date just 184 00:06:21,723 --> 00:06:23,791 couldn't just magically change on its own. 185 00:06:25,360 --> 00:06:28,129 Okay, all right, I really appreciate it. 186 00:06:28,129 --> 00:06:30,865 Thank you, just, just let me know what happens. 187 00:06:30,865 --> 00:06:32,133 Bye bye. 188 00:06:32,133 --> 00:06:33,735 What did she say? 189 00:06:33,735 --> 00:06:36,137 She said she gonna try to figure out what's happening, 190 00:06:36,137 --> 00:06:37,572 and then she asked me if I-- 191 00:06:37,572 --> 00:06:39,507 if she could go to the mayor's reception with me. 192 00:06:39,507 --> 00:06:41,209 She wanna be my plus one. 193 00:06:41,209 --> 00:06:42,410 -Mm... -Yeah. 194 00:06:42,410 --> 00:06:44,379 -Cora... -She wanna do damage control. 195 00:06:44,379 --> 00:06:46,214 Now, something about this don't seem right. 196 00:06:46,214 --> 00:06:47,582 I, I don't have a good feeling. 197 00:06:47,582 --> 00:06:49,083 Girl, you, you right. 198 00:06:49,083 --> 00:06:50,652 It does sound a little strange. 199 00:06:50,652 --> 00:06:51,853 But you know, that Louise, you know, 200 00:06:51,853 --> 00:06:54,122 -her event was this week also. -Hmm... 201 00:06:54,122 --> 00:06:56,724 And I heard she didn't have that many RSVPs. 202 00:06:56,724 --> 00:06:57,692 Hmm... 203 00:06:57,692 --> 00:06:59,527 So she may have sabotaged my date 204 00:06:59,527 --> 00:07:00,928 just so she could bring hers up! 205 00:07:00,928 --> 00:07:02,930 [grunts] 206 00:07:02,930 --> 00:07:04,165 Lyin' Louise. 207 00:07:04,165 --> 00:07:10,104 [music] 208 00:07:14,242 --> 00:07:15,443 Clear! 209 00:07:19,681 --> 00:07:20,982 Clear! 210 00:07:27,355 --> 00:07:28,756 Clear! 211 00:07:30,391 --> 00:07:32,060 Oh, someone spotted! 212 00:07:37,131 --> 00:07:38,800 [screaming] 213 00:07:38,800 --> 00:07:40,535 Oh my gosh! 214 00:07:40,535 --> 00:07:43,204 Boy, what you trying to do? Give me a heart attack? 215 00:07:43,204 --> 00:07:45,139 Trying to make me wear Depends? 216 00:07:45,139 --> 00:07:46,607 How'd you get up so fast. 217 00:07:46,607 --> 00:07:48,476 'Cause I'm fast like that. 218 00:07:48,476 --> 00:07:49,911 [shouting] 219 00:07:49,911 --> 00:07:52,046 Girl, you almost got sprayed in the face. 220 00:07:52,046 --> 00:07:54,015 Now, that's not usually the reaction I get 221 00:07:54,015 --> 00:07:56,884 when I enter a room. Why are you two so jumpy? 222 00:07:56,884 --> 00:07:58,519 -You ain't hear? -[Anastasia] No. 223 00:07:58,519 --> 00:07:59,954 There was another break-in 224 00:07:59,954 --> 00:08:01,456 at the assisted living facility across the street. 225 00:08:01,456 --> 00:08:02,924 Yeah, and this old lady 226 00:08:02,924 --> 00:08:05,059 that used to be a gangster rapper back in the day? 227 00:08:05,059 --> 00:08:07,261 They ripped her gold-plated dentures 228 00:08:07,261 --> 00:08:08,796 right out of her mouth! 229 00:08:10,031 --> 00:08:12,166 Yeah, and this guy get pistol whipped 230 00:08:12,166 --> 00:08:13,901 in a motorized scooter jacking. 231 00:08:13,901 --> 00:08:16,537 Yeah, I just spoke to the facility manager 232 00:08:16,537 --> 00:08:18,372 across the street. Now, none of that happened, 233 00:08:18,372 --> 00:08:20,942 but the thieves are still at large. 234 00:08:20,942 --> 00:08:23,644 It's enough we have to deal with--sagging skin, 235 00:08:23,644 --> 00:08:27,415 cellulite, and dying before the next episode of... 236 00:08:27,415 --> 00:08:29,150 Oh, that reminds me. 237 00:08:29,150 --> 00:08:30,451 You're right, 238 00:08:30,451 --> 00:08:31,986 we shouldn't have to worry about crime sprees 239 00:08:31,986 --> 00:08:34,000 and people sticking us up for our papers. 240 00:08:34,000 --> 00:08:35,456 and people sticking us up for our papers. 241 00:08:35,456 --> 00:08:36,557 What do you mean, sticking up for-- 242 00:08:36,557 --> 00:08:37,792 [screaming] 243 00:08:37,792 --> 00:08:39,093 Man, I thought you had my back. 244 00:08:39,093 --> 00:08:40,962 Well, he too dark. He just popped up! 245 00:08:40,962 --> 00:08:43,464 What are you guys talking about papers and sticking up? 246 00:08:43,464 --> 00:08:45,066 What does that even mean? 247 00:08:45,066 --> 00:08:47,268 It means hide your valuables, hide your cash. 248 00:08:47,268 --> 00:08:48,669 Hide your drip, hide your ice. 249 00:08:48,669 --> 00:08:50,471 Hide your mama, hide all of your stuff! 250 00:08:50,471 --> 00:08:51,773 You're talking about the misfortune 251 00:08:51,773 --> 00:08:53,775 that happened to the other facility, huh? 252 00:08:53,775 --> 00:08:55,076 My prayers are with them. 253 00:08:55,076 --> 00:08:56,110 But, but, but! 254 00:08:56,110 --> 00:08:58,246 There's an African proverb that says, 255 00:08:58,246 --> 00:09:00,815 "One who causes another person's misfortune 256 00:09:00,815 --> 00:09:03,084 "also teaches them wisdom, 257 00:09:03,084 --> 00:09:05,953 "because in all things, even the bad, 258 00:09:05,953 --> 00:09:08,122 there's always something to be learned." 259 00:09:10,625 --> 00:09:13,027 I know he said something profanity, but he... 260 00:09:13,027 --> 00:09:13,995 I don't get it. 261 00:09:13,995 --> 00:09:15,897 -African proverb... -Yeah, yeah. 262 00:09:15,897 --> 00:09:18,366 -It was real profound. -Yeah, yeah, yeah... 263 00:09:18,366 --> 00:09:20,034 The two of you are very useless. 264 00:09:23,638 --> 00:09:24,939 You did a good job installing 265 00:09:24,939 --> 00:09:27,108 the surveillance camera system, man. 266 00:09:27,108 --> 00:09:28,943 You really know what you're doing, huh? 267 00:09:28,943 --> 00:09:30,378 I couldn't even see the wires. 268 00:09:30,378 --> 00:09:31,579 It's, uh... 269 00:09:31,579 --> 00:09:32,847 It's a wireless system, Dad. 270 00:09:32,847 --> 00:09:35,550 -I knew that. Shut up. -Right. 271 00:09:35,550 --> 00:09:36,684 Well, ain't nothing getting past that baby. 272 00:09:36,684 --> 00:09:38,953 I mean, it's got sirens, night vision, 273 00:09:38,953 --> 00:09:41,122 uh, facial recognition, and dual audio. 274 00:09:41,122 --> 00:09:43,858 Nice. Well, let's give it a test run. 275 00:09:43,858 --> 00:09:46,627 All right, but just, just be smooth. 276 00:09:46,627 --> 00:09:47,995 What you mean, be smooth? I'm always smooth. 277 00:09:47,995 --> 00:09:49,664 Get out of here. 278 00:09:49,664 --> 00:09:51,098 I mean, we know how you get around electronics 279 00:09:51,098 --> 00:09:53,434 and just things that light up in general. 280 00:09:53,434 --> 00:09:56,838 Just think back to decades and decades and decades ago 281 00:09:56,838 --> 00:09:58,673 when you were young, right? 282 00:09:58,673 --> 00:10:00,875 And you saw a nice-lookin' lady for the first time. 283 00:10:00,875 --> 00:10:02,777 Hey, man, you wanna get me in trouble? 284 00:10:02,777 --> 00:10:04,712 No, before Mom, right? 285 00:10:04,712 --> 00:10:06,547 You used to be cool, right? 286 00:10:06,547 --> 00:10:07,815 Less thirsty? 287 00:10:07,815 --> 00:10:09,283 Well, do that now. 288 00:10:10,284 --> 00:10:12,486 Hey...cutie. 289 00:10:12,486 --> 00:10:14,288 [giggles] 290 00:10:14,288 --> 00:10:15,990 Nice shoes on. 291 00:10:15,990 --> 00:10:17,158 Like it here? 292 00:10:17,158 --> 00:10:18,125 Don't be a creep. 293 00:10:18,125 --> 00:10:19,227 Just sign in. 294 00:10:19,227 --> 00:10:21,095 And whatever you do, don't hit the red-- 295 00:10:21,095 --> 00:10:23,965 [alarm blaring] 296 00:10:23,965 --> 00:10:25,533 Oh! 297 00:10:25,533 --> 00:10:26,901 -What did I do? -You hit the red button-- 298 00:10:26,901 --> 00:10:28,669 the button I told you not to hit. 299 00:10:28,669 --> 00:10:30,071 Man, you should've said it faster! 300 00:10:33,841 --> 00:10:35,476 Okay, how can we protect ourself 301 00:10:35,476 --> 00:10:38,512 when the security system is making us blinder and deafer? 302 00:10:39,480 --> 00:10:42,149 I found this on the front yard while I was taking my walk. 303 00:10:42,149 --> 00:10:45,453 Somebody's been posting them all over town. 304 00:10:45,453 --> 00:10:48,155 I'm sorry, Cora. 305 00:10:48,155 --> 00:10:49,190 No. 306 00:10:49,190 --> 00:10:51,459 They didn't even spell her name right! 307 00:10:51,459 --> 00:10:52,760 What it say? What it say? 308 00:10:52,760 --> 00:10:54,762 "Cora Brown"-- that ain't her name! 309 00:10:54,762 --> 00:10:56,497 Why would somebody wanna do that? 310 00:10:56,497 --> 00:10:58,132 Why would somebody wanna do that!? 311 00:10:58,132 --> 00:10:59,333 [music] 312 00:10:59,333 --> 00:11:01,235 -Man. -çLeah sighs] 313 00:11:02,345 --> 00:11:03,713 [music] 314 00:11:03,713 --> 00:11:05,748 Before our self-defense class begins, 315 00:11:05,748 --> 00:11:07,984 I just wanted to check in with everybody 316 00:11:07,984 --> 00:11:10,186 after the crazy week we've had... 317 00:11:10,653 --> 00:11:11,788 [grunts] 318 00:11:11,788 --> 00:11:13,723 Does Cora's campaign opponent still claim 319 00:11:13,723 --> 00:11:15,024 she has nothing to do with the signs 320 00:11:15,024 --> 00:11:17,794 or involvement in the event sabotage? 321 00:11:17,794 --> 00:11:19,896 Yeah, that's her story. She's sticking to it. 322 00:11:19,896 --> 00:11:21,631 But Philip and I, we drove around town 323 00:11:21,631 --> 00:11:23,333 and grabbed as many signs as we could. 324 00:11:23,333 --> 00:11:25,802 Yeah, and I started a hashtag, #SingingDivaForPresident, 325 00:11:25,802 --> 00:11:27,870 on my Ding Dong account. 326 00:11:27,870 --> 00:11:31,307 Bravo, but I have an Epsom salt bath waiting. 327 00:11:31,307 --> 00:11:33,176 Where's the instructor? 328 00:11:36,679 --> 00:11:37,880 Come forward! 329 00:11:37,880 --> 00:11:39,382 I'm your instructor for today. 330 00:11:39,382 --> 00:11:40,416 [everybody groans] 331 00:11:40,416 --> 00:11:42,719 "Ohhh" what? 332 00:11:42,719 --> 00:11:43,886 Somebody wanna be whooped early? 333 00:11:43,886 --> 00:11:46,789 I didn't say anything. 334 00:11:46,789 --> 00:11:48,157 Hey, everybody. 335 00:11:48,157 --> 00:11:49,225 [Group] Hey, Cora. 336 00:11:49,225 --> 00:11:50,760 I just wanna [coughs] thank everybody 337 00:11:50,760 --> 00:11:53,329 for all your love and support, 338 00:11:53,329 --> 00:11:56,065 well, on everything, and... 339 00:11:56,065 --> 00:11:58,468 But, you know, I'm, I'm fine. 340 00:11:58,468 --> 00:12:02,505 And, uh, I'll be--I'll be fine. 341 00:12:02,505 --> 00:12:05,942 Really, I'm...I'm really fine. 342 00:12:05,942 --> 00:12:07,477 That's a lot of "I'm fines." 343 00:12:07,477 --> 00:12:08,845 It's like one more "I'm fine" 344 00:12:08,845 --> 00:12:11,047 before she lays hands on somebody. 345 00:12:11,047 --> 00:12:13,883 Good to see you in better spirits, Cora. 346 00:12:13,883 --> 00:12:16,452 Oh, thank, thank you so much, Mister, Mr. Reginald. 347 00:12:16,452 --> 00:12:17,987 Oh... 348 00:12:17,987 --> 00:12:19,689 I didn't wanna miss the self-defense class. 349 00:12:19,689 --> 00:12:21,391 [coughs] 350 00:12:21,391 --> 00:12:22,892 So! 351 00:12:22,892 --> 00:12:25,628 I will be your instructor for today 352 00:12:25,628 --> 00:12:28,698 to teach you self-destruction! 353 00:12:28,698 --> 00:12:34,270 So if you and you want to learn my technique, come follow me. 354 00:12:36,172 --> 00:12:37,206 Okay. 355 00:12:37,206 --> 00:12:40,076 You are here today 356 00:12:40,076 --> 00:12:41,544 because you 357 00:12:41,544 --> 00:12:43,046 can't defend yourself. 358 00:12:44,614 --> 00:12:46,115 I'm going to teach you techniques 359 00:12:46,115 --> 00:12:49,118 taught to me by Grand Master Kung Fu Brotha! 360 00:12:51,554 --> 00:12:54,023 I will teach you techniques 361 00:12:54,023 --> 00:12:56,859 that if someone went up to you and say, 362 00:12:56,859 --> 00:12:59,095 "Give me your Social Security check!" 363 00:12:59,095 --> 00:13:03,499 you will be able to defend yourself today. 364 00:13:03,499 --> 00:13:05,868 Now, watch and learn. 365 00:13:05,868 --> 00:13:11,307 Someone steps to you, you--first thing is you must stomp! 366 00:13:11,307 --> 00:13:12,942 Stomp! 367 00:13:12,942 --> 00:13:15,778 The next thing, slap the taste out of their mouth! 368 00:13:15,778 --> 00:13:17,113 -[all grunting] -Slap it! 369 00:13:17,113 --> 00:13:19,282 -[all grunting] -Now choke it! 370 00:13:19,282 --> 00:13:20,983 -[all grunting] -Now put it together! 371 00:13:20,983 --> 00:13:22,051 Stomp! 372 00:13:22,051 --> 00:13:22,985 Slap! 373 00:13:22,985 --> 00:13:24,287 Choke! 374 00:13:24,287 --> 00:13:26,422 Stomp, slap, choke! 375 00:13:26,422 --> 00:13:27,757 Now we must put a twist on it. 376 00:13:27,757 --> 00:13:29,926 -When you choke, grind it! -Oh! 377 00:13:29,926 --> 00:13:31,928 Stomp, slap, choke! 378 00:13:32,628 --> 00:13:34,330 Stomp, slap, choke! 379 00:13:34,330 --> 00:13:37,700 Now, I want to show you how to grind on the groin! 380 00:13:37,700 --> 00:13:39,435 Grind the groin! 381 00:13:40,970 --> 00:13:43,539 You must first go to the left. 382 00:13:43,539 --> 00:13:44,907 Go to the left. 383 00:13:44,907 --> 00:13:46,809 Now knee to groin. 384 00:13:46,809 --> 00:13:48,578 Now go to the right. 385 00:13:48,578 --> 00:13:49,979 Go to the right. 386 00:13:49,979 --> 00:13:51,214 Now knee to groin! 387 00:13:51,214 --> 00:13:52,582 Knee it! Knee it! 388 00:13:52,582 --> 00:13:54,784 Go nuts! Go nuts! Go nuts! 389 00:13:54,784 --> 00:13:56,119 [shouting] 390 00:13:56,119 --> 00:14:00,456 Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! 391 00:14:00,456 --> 00:14:01,791 Wait. 392 00:14:01,791 --> 00:14:03,893 Cora, you gettin' carried away. 393 00:14:03,893 --> 00:14:05,361 -You mad at something? -Mm-hmm. 394 00:14:06,496 --> 00:14:09,298 Stomp, slap, choke. 395 00:14:10,133 --> 00:14:13,536 Stomp, stomp, stomp, choke! 396 00:14:13,536 --> 00:14:15,938 Okay, okay, champ. 397 00:14:15,938 --> 00:14:18,274 Hey, you might wanna channel some of that energy 398 00:14:18,274 --> 00:14:22,111 into giving Lying Louise a dose of her own medicine. 399 00:14:22,111 --> 00:14:23,779 You know, I got some dudes from the low end 400 00:14:23,779 --> 00:14:25,882 that could come up here, go to her event, 401 00:14:25,882 --> 00:14:27,283 turn that mother out! 402 00:14:28,618 --> 00:14:29,719 Hard pass. 403 00:14:29,719 --> 00:14:31,821 Hard pass, y'all. 404 00:14:31,821 --> 00:14:34,290 'Cause right now, I don't know what to do. 405 00:14:35,358 --> 00:14:38,027 Just gonna have to let the Lord just guide me. 406 00:14:38,027 --> 00:14:42,031 Yes, when they go low, you don't go lower. 407 00:14:42,031 --> 00:14:43,599 The best revenge is to keep 408 00:14:43,599 --> 00:14:46,035 your self-respect and dignity, huh? 409 00:14:46,035 --> 00:14:47,370 Because you know in all-- 410 00:14:47,370 --> 00:14:51,674 All things, yes, in all things, even bad, 411 00:14:51,674 --> 00:14:54,043 -there's a lesson to learn. -Exactly. 412 00:14:54,043 --> 00:14:56,979 That sounds good right now. That sounds real good. 413 00:14:56,979 --> 00:14:59,182 You always got to use these Africanisms? 414 00:14:59,182 --> 00:15:00,883 My friend, don't hate, huh? 415 00:15:00,883 --> 00:15:02,785 Come, I'll teach you some Africanism. 416 00:15:02,785 --> 00:15:03,786 I'll make you African. 417 00:15:03,786 --> 00:15:04,921 [laughs] 418 00:15:04,921 --> 00:15:07,156 I don't want to learn. 419 00:15:07,924 --> 00:15:09,825 Ooh, Leah, this... 420 00:15:09,825 --> 00:15:11,260 This is hard. This is hard. 421 00:15:11,260 --> 00:15:12,261 I know, Cora. 422 00:15:12,261 --> 00:15:13,896 -[phone ringing] -[Cora sighs] 423 00:15:13,896 --> 00:15:15,064 I'm so sorry. 424 00:15:18,701 --> 00:15:19,902 Hello? 425 00:15:21,170 --> 00:15:22,538 Yes. 426 00:15:23,706 --> 00:15:26,275 Yeah, I understand. 427 00:15:26,275 --> 00:15:28,244 I don't...I do. 428 00:15:28,244 --> 00:15:30,279 But I don't think that's what's best. 429 00:15:33,382 --> 00:15:34,717 I tell you what. 430 00:15:34,717 --> 00:15:38,087 I'll let you know what I decide, okay? 431 00:15:38,087 --> 00:15:40,489 All right, I'll call you back. 432 00:15:40,489 --> 00:15:41,524 Thanks, bye. 433 00:15:43,159 --> 00:15:45,528 Let me guess, your campaign manager? 434 00:15:45,528 --> 00:15:47,196 Yup. 435 00:15:47,196 --> 00:15:52,535 She thinks I should just...bow out gracefully. 436 00:15:52,535 --> 00:15:55,037 What? 437 00:15:55,037 --> 00:15:56,872 Maybe she's right. 438 00:15:57,540 --> 00:16:01,000 [music] 439 00:16:01,000 --> 00:16:02,511 [music] 440 00:16:02,511 --> 00:16:04,180 Mm-hmm... 441 00:16:05,214 --> 00:16:07,016 Okay, what else do we know? 442 00:16:07,016 --> 00:16:09,752 Lying Louise drives a Mercedes-Benz, 443 00:16:09,752 --> 00:16:12,622 wears designer clothes and shoes, 444 00:16:12,622 --> 00:16:14,523 but everything is old and ratty. 445 00:16:14,523 --> 00:16:17,360 The woman hasn't been shopping since the eighties. 446 00:16:18,461 --> 00:16:21,097 One of my honeys, who works at the bank, 447 00:16:21,097 --> 00:16:23,733 said that she saw Louise arguing with a teller 448 00:16:23,733 --> 00:16:26,235 over--about her overdraft account. 449 00:16:26,235 --> 00:16:29,839 So Lyin' Louise is having money problems. 450 00:16:29,839 --> 00:16:31,207 What else do we have? 451 00:16:31,207 --> 00:16:32,942 Well, when I went out to get an oil change, 452 00:16:32,942 --> 00:16:34,677 I saw that old Mercedes up there, 453 00:16:34,677 --> 00:16:37,747 and she had the letters "LL" engraved in the seats. 454 00:16:37,747 --> 00:16:40,082 "Lyin' Louise." 455 00:16:40,082 --> 00:16:41,550 Lyin' Louise isn't her real name, 456 00:16:41,550 --> 00:16:44,553 so why would she have that engraved in her seats? 457 00:16:44,553 --> 00:16:48,190 That's just what some of the ladies at the church call her... 458 00:16:48,190 --> 00:16:49,025 Hm. 459 00:16:50,026 --> 00:16:53,262 Small homemade batches with natural ingredients 460 00:16:53,262 --> 00:16:58,167 like butter, brown sugar, and vanilla. 461 00:16:58,167 --> 00:17:00,036 I will investigate further! 462 00:17:01,070 --> 00:17:03,873 LaRue Cookies, huh? Enjoy them while you can. 463 00:17:03,873 --> 00:17:06,876 The company's going belly up--bankrupt! 464 00:17:06,876 --> 00:17:09,145 Assets frozen and seized. 465 00:17:09,145 --> 00:17:13,416 Officers and board members being investigated for fraud, 466 00:17:13,416 --> 00:17:16,352 corruption, tax evasion, you name it. 467 00:17:16,352 --> 00:17:18,120 Mm! 468 00:17:18,120 --> 00:17:21,290 Someone get me Lyin' Louise's real name. 469 00:17:21,290 --> 00:17:23,559 Hold up, what kind of investigation are we doing 470 00:17:23,559 --> 00:17:26,228 when we don't even know the name of the person we investigating? 471 00:17:28,230 --> 00:17:31,667 We're not investigators. We are fixers. 472 00:17:31,667 --> 00:17:33,569 We fix things. 473 00:17:33,569 --> 00:17:36,872 We fix ourselves and we fix other people. 474 00:17:36,872 --> 00:17:38,107 That's what we do. 475 00:17:38,107 --> 00:17:39,709 That's who we are... 476 00:17:39,709 --> 00:17:42,578 [music] 477 00:17:46,649 --> 00:17:48,417 [sighs] 478 00:17:51,687 --> 00:17:54,590 Guys, guys, guess what? 479 00:17:54,590 --> 00:17:55,725 Hey... 480 00:17:55,725 --> 00:17:56,892 What is it, Philip? 481 00:17:56,892 --> 00:17:58,227 Are y'all supposed to be gladiators? 482 00:18:00,196 --> 00:18:01,364 What is it, Philip? 483 00:18:01,364 --> 00:18:02,865 We're in the middle of a meeting. 484 00:18:02,865 --> 00:18:04,533 A really important meeting. 485 00:18:04,533 --> 00:18:05,534 Okay, well, hold up. 486 00:18:05,534 --> 00:18:07,169 I had a substitute teacher today. 487 00:18:07,169 --> 00:18:08,904 And guess what she brought to class as a treat. 488 00:18:08,904 --> 00:18:10,973 Donuts? 489 00:18:10,973 --> 00:18:13,209 I guess pizza. 490 00:18:13,209 --> 00:18:15,444 Wings of a chicken. 491 00:18:15,444 --> 00:18:16,979 Guys, guys, guys, stop guessing. 492 00:18:16,979 --> 00:18:18,814 It was a rhetorical question. 493 00:18:18,814 --> 00:18:21,417 She brought a box of LaRue Cookies. 494 00:18:21,417 --> 00:18:23,419 So her name was Miss Louise, 495 00:18:23,419 --> 00:18:25,955 but guess what her real name was? 496 00:18:25,955 --> 00:18:28,057 Louise LaRue. 497 00:18:28,057 --> 00:18:29,558 I knew it! 498 00:18:29,558 --> 00:18:33,629 Those schemin', lyin', conniving-- 499 00:18:33,629 --> 00:18:34,997 Okay! Whoa, whoa, whoa. 500 00:18:34,997 --> 00:18:37,299 Okay, look, check this out. 501 00:18:41,337 --> 00:18:43,372 Even though the surveillance system 502 00:18:43,372 --> 00:18:45,341 went crazy the other day, 503 00:18:45,341 --> 00:18:47,510 cameras were still recording. 504 00:18:47,510 --> 00:18:49,578 And guess what the front camera caught? 505 00:18:50,679 --> 00:18:52,481 -Oh! -Wow... 506 00:18:53,616 --> 00:18:55,317 Let me guess-- 507 00:18:55,317 --> 00:18:58,020 Donna and that Lyin' Louise LaRue. 508 00:19:00,256 --> 00:19:03,426 Yeah, they put those nasty campaign signs out. 509 00:19:03,426 --> 00:19:05,828 -So you knew? -Yes, I knew. 510 00:19:05,828 --> 00:19:08,230 The Lord put it on my heart to give Donna a call, you know, 511 00:19:08,230 --> 00:19:11,066 and show her some compassion, and I did. 512 00:19:11,066 --> 00:19:14,203 And she just started tellin' me everything. 513 00:19:14,203 --> 00:19:16,972 Her and her evil sister were in cahoots the whole time! 514 00:19:16,972 --> 00:19:18,374 Yeah. 515 00:19:18,374 --> 00:19:20,476 Donna figured if Louise won the election, 516 00:19:20,476 --> 00:19:24,079 she could control the finances and meet the right people 517 00:19:24,079 --> 00:19:26,415 and get back on her feet again. 518 00:19:27,716 --> 00:19:31,554 Well, thankfully, Cora, the day has been saved and handled. 519 00:19:31,554 --> 00:19:35,925 So, does this mean you're the new president of the board? 520 00:19:35,925 --> 00:19:38,994 Well, I guess so, by default. 521 00:19:38,994 --> 00:19:41,897 No, no, no, Cora, you took the high road. 522 00:19:41,897 --> 00:19:46,235 So if God blessed you with that, it is not default. 523 00:19:46,235 --> 00:19:48,237 It is by God's design. 524 00:19:48,237 --> 00:19:49,972 I guess you're right, Efe. 525 00:19:49,972 --> 00:19:51,273 -[laughter] -You know what? 526 00:19:51,273 --> 00:19:53,642 Hey, y'all. Let's celebrate! 527 00:19:53,642 --> 00:19:55,110 [cheering] 528 00:19:56,888 --> 00:19:59,191 I've got to tell y'all somethin' that's been on-- 529 00:19:59,191 --> 00:20:01,326 Oh, you already done set up a board. 530 00:20:01,326 --> 00:20:03,261 I'mma tell you this, Cora, 'cause I love you, 531 00:20:03,261 --> 00:20:04,663 and I done figured this out for you. 532 00:20:04,663 --> 00:20:06,798 I done figured out who been savage-tagin' 533 00:20:06,798 --> 00:20:08,200 and slayin' your name, Cora. 534 00:20:08,200 --> 00:20:10,035 -Sab-sabotaging... -Whatever! 535 00:20:10,035 --> 00:20:12,103 Cora, look right here! You already got it up. 536 00:20:12,103 --> 00:20:14,639 Okay, this right here is Louise Jefferson. 537 00:20:14,639 --> 00:20:17,642 Louise Jefferson is really Louise LaRue! 538 00:20:17,642 --> 00:20:20,845 Jefferson was her ex-husband's last name. 539 00:20:20,845 --> 00:20:22,681 He gone on to be with Dolores. 540 00:20:22,681 --> 00:20:24,282 -Oh, Dolores? -Dolores? 541 00:20:24,282 --> 00:20:25,817 I don't know if he was a Christian or whatever, 542 00:20:25,817 --> 00:20:29,187 so I just say Dolores in case he was going down to... 543 00:20:29,187 --> 00:20:30,455 That's right. 544 00:20:30,455 --> 00:20:33,225 So she is really Donna's sister! 545 00:20:33,225 --> 00:20:34,526 -Really? -[Efe] Yeah! 546 00:20:34,526 --> 00:20:36,595 You know what we'd call you in Africa? 547 00:20:36,595 --> 00:20:37,329 What? 548 00:20:37,329 --> 00:20:39,798 JJC--Johnny Just Come. 549 00:20:39,798 --> 00:20:41,066 We've run this disease! 550 00:20:41,066 --> 00:20:42,534 Yes, we already know! 551 00:20:42,534 --> 00:20:43,935 You know what we'd call you in America? 552 00:20:43,935 --> 00:20:45,704 -What? -Shut up! 553 00:20:45,704 --> 00:20:47,806 [arguing] 554 00:20:47,806 --> 00:20:48,940 You don't know nothin'. 555 00:20:48,940 --> 00:20:52,944 [arguing] [music] 556 00:20:52,944 --> 00:20:54,246 Come here again! 557 00:20:55,130 --> 00:20:58,700 [music] 558 00:21:24,585 --> 00:21:25,620 [music] 559 00:21:26,587 --> 00:21:28,422 [BET theme]