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00:00:00,734 --> 00:00:03,770
[smooth music]
2
00:00:03,770 --> 00:00:05,238
Hey!
3
00:00:06,506 --> 00:00:12,679
♪ Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey,
ah, hey, ah, ah, hey ♪
4
00:00:12,679 --> 00:00:15,648
[indistinct]!
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00:00:15,648 --> 00:00:17,217
Hey!
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Hey!
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-You so damn stupid.
-Ain't nobody stupid!
8
00:00:21,821 --> 00:00:23,289
-What you talkin' about?!
-Man, that's profilin', man.
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How is it profilin'?!
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He was found in the wee hours
of the morning,
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in the desert, scraped up by
barbed wire, barefooted!
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00:00:28,995 --> 00:00:30,230
That ain't profilin'!
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That don't mean the man was
an illegal, fool!
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You know what, I would say use
the good sense
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that the Lord gave you, but
he didn't give you none.
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Man, I'll hit you hard, I'll
make that suit polka-dotted.
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Just shut up, man.
Shut up.
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What, what is all this?
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I've started a new foundation.
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Man, is this some of that
old nasty beet juice
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you tryin' to sell again?
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No, no, far from it.
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This ain't one of those
"Go Africa or go home", is it?
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Man, I ain't goin' nowhere.
I don't speak the language.
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I need the ladies to understand
me
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so they can give me what I need.
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No, no, you don't have to go
anywhere.
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But I'm sure you both might need
a little R&R.
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Renee and Renita?
I had the twins last night, boy.
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Are you talkin' about revival
and repentance?
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No, R&R stands for [indistinct].
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Root, root!
Root, root!
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Stupid, stupid!
Stupid, stupid!
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-That's kinda corny.
-No, no, no,
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it is, it is my new foundation!
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Look, I am starting
a roots drive
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to, to raise funds to build
my first well in Africa.
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You know what, that's good!
That's a good cause, ain't it?
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Man, that's stupid.
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Wouldn't it be easier for you to
just
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send them people over there
some bottled water?
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You know what, the last piece of
your hair done left your head
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-and took your brain with it.
-Ooh, I wanna fight you so bad.
44
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Well, then, do it, then.
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Do it, that's all we gotta do,
do it.
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-Just move the table.
-"Free DNA tests."
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Yes, yes!
Take one!
48
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And enter into a drawing to win
a free trip to the motherland.
49
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Oh, I ain't got to do
that to go to the motherland.
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I'm from the motherland.
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Which part?
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The land that my mother was on.
Thank you.
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Here's a donation, Efe.
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I'd give my DNA,
55
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but I'm afraid
my eighth ex-husband
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might find out I'm still alive.
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He's scouring the country
in search of my fossils.
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Here, here you go.
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Those things never work out
for me.
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The last time I had one,
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they said I was half Teletubby
and third cousin of Dolemite.
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So, no takers?
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Hey, brother [indistinct]!
Come on, brother!
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Come on, now.
This is for a great cause!
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Let me tell you,
I can see it now, man.
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The government might clone
my seed
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and impregnate all the women.
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That is way too much
child support.
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I can't change no diapers,
I'm wearin' one myself.
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Hey!
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Hey, [indistinct]!
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[groovy music]
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♪ No matter what you do,
I love you ♪
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♪ No matter where you go,
I'm behind you for sure ♪
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♪ Always remember ,
blood ain't never water ♪
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♪ We'll make it if we stay
together ♪
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[groovy music]
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Hello, Efe!
79
00:03:05,052 --> 00:03:07,621
Oh, hello, my sister Karen!
80
00:03:08,355 --> 00:03:10,323
What has got you so excited
today?
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00:03:10,323 --> 00:03:13,026
Hopefully she joined
a nudist camp and movin' out.
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That would be great.
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You may be looking at the new
part-time curator
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of the Museum of History and
Culture!
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Once they find out
she ain't got no culture,
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they gonna change the name of
the Museum
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to The Museum of the
Livin' Dead.
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I thought they were closing
that place down.
89
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They're makin'
a last-ditch effort
90
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to keep it afloat.
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And I just know
if they hire me,
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that I'll be able to breathe
new life into it!
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You know, ever since I was
a little girl,
94
00:03:44,191 --> 00:03:47,260
I always wanted to have
an art gallery.
95
00:03:47,594 --> 00:03:50,230
But my parents frowned on being
an artist.
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00:03:50,230 --> 00:03:52,532
-[Efe] Hm.
-But art is in my blood!
97
00:03:52,866 --> 00:03:56,503
Ooh, why don't you take
a roots DNA test, ay,
98
00:03:56,503 --> 00:03:58,438
and see who your ancestors are?
99
00:03:58,438 --> 00:04:02,642
Ooh, you know, lore has it
that I come from a long line
100
00:04:02,642 --> 00:04:05,979
of esteemed artistes ,
like Van Gogh and da Vinci.
101
00:04:05,979 --> 00:04:07,214
[giggling]
102
00:04:07,214 --> 00:04:09,950
Ooh, and I would just love to
find out
103
00:04:09,950 --> 00:04:11,885
that I'm related to Medici!
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00:04:11,885 --> 00:04:13,720
I've got a taker!
105
00:04:14,287 --> 00:04:16,022
You know what?
Make that two.
106
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If she's related to artists,
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00:04:17,724 --> 00:04:20,994
then I've gotta be related to
my hero, Solomon.
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700 wives, 300 concubine.
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Everybody naked, everybody!
110
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Naked!
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00:04:31,138 --> 00:04:32,305
Jeremy!
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Yo, why you yellin' my name
like you crazy?
113
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What's goin' on?
114
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This doorknob still isn't
working.
115
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There ain't nothin' wrong
with this doorknob,
116
00:04:41,114 --> 00:04:42,582
you just don't know how to
work it.
117
00:04:43,650 --> 00:04:44,651
Look.
118
00:04:45,418 --> 00:04:47,320
-I don't know how to work it.
-See?
119
00:04:47,320 --> 00:04:50,023
Dad, how am I supposed to do
my presentation
120
00:04:50,023 --> 00:04:51,424
in this wrinkled suit?
121
00:04:51,424 --> 00:04:54,327
Jeremy, you were supposed to
take this to the cleaners
122
00:04:54,327 --> 00:04:55,695
and have it steamed!
123
00:04:55,695 --> 00:04:57,130
I know, but I've been busy, man.
124
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I had to help Reginald with
his closet rack, I'm sorry.
125
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Had to, huh?
126
00:05:00,834 --> 00:05:03,703
Okay, well, uh, if I don't wear
that suit,
127
00:05:03,703 --> 00:05:06,239
then the next thing you'll see
me in is a reflective vest
128
00:05:06,239 --> 00:05:07,807
because I would've flunked out.
129
00:05:08,108 --> 00:05:09,509
No, no, baby.
130
00:05:09,509 --> 00:05:11,545
I'll take care of it
and drop it at the school.
131
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-Thank you.
-Mm-hm.
132
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He don't have no job at all.
133
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Why are you telling him
about...
134
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What's this?
135
00:05:21,454 --> 00:05:22,889
Your honey-do list.
136
00:05:23,890 --> 00:05:27,227
It has been growing
for the past three months.
137
00:05:27,761 --> 00:05:29,296
You're always exaggerating.
138
00:05:29,296 --> 00:05:33,300
This has been, like, two months,
and this stuff is done, look.
139
00:05:33,300 --> 00:05:34,634
Pull the weeds, check.
140
00:05:34,634 --> 00:05:36,603
Level bed slats, check.
141
00:05:37,771 --> 00:05:40,473
Replace hinge on closet door,
check, check.
142
00:05:40,473 --> 00:05:42,142
Change the showerhead, check.
143
00:05:42,142 --> 00:05:44,945
Fix the doorknob, just did that.
What we talkin' about?
144
00:05:44,945 --> 00:05:47,080
Jeremy, why are you checkin'
things off
145
00:05:47,080 --> 00:05:48,515
that have not been done yet?
146
00:05:48,515 --> 00:05:49,749
Because I like to think ahead,
Leah.
147
00:05:49,749 --> 00:05:51,251
Alright?
You know what I'm sayin'?
148
00:05:51,251 --> 00:05:52,552
Make me feel like it's already
done.
149
00:05:52,552 --> 00:05:54,988
Oh, okay, well, the point of
the honey-do list...
150
00:05:55,655 --> 00:05:58,391
...is to actually do it, honey.
151
00:05:59,025 --> 00:06:01,061
Whatever.
I gotta go.
152
00:06:01,061 --> 00:06:02,629
Wait, where you goin'?
153
00:06:02,629 --> 00:06:03,964
Ugh, I'm runnin' late.
154
00:06:03,964 --> 00:06:05,599
I told Cora I will come down to
the church
155
00:06:05,599 --> 00:06:07,200
to help install
the trampoline mats.
156
00:06:07,200 --> 00:06:08,868
-Hm.
-Yeah.
157
00:06:08,868 --> 00:06:10,670
She got her Jump for Jesus
campaign, so...
158
00:06:10,670 --> 00:06:13,273
Wait, hold on.
What is the tank top for?
159
00:06:13,273 --> 00:06:15,675
Ah, you know, it get a little,
it get a little hot over there.
160
00:06:15,675 --> 00:06:18,478
When I wear this,
them old church geezers,
161
00:06:18,478 --> 00:06:20,380
they give your boy extra
peppermints.
162
00:06:20,380 --> 00:06:22,015
Hold on, them old church geezers
163
00:06:22,015 --> 00:06:23,950
better keep them peppermints
to themselves.
164
00:06:23,950 --> 00:06:25,785
Yeah.
165
00:06:27,420 --> 00:06:28,655
[mutters to self]
[loud click]
166
00:06:29,756 --> 00:06:32,726
I thought the doorknob was
fixed, Jeremy!
167
00:06:33,326 --> 00:06:37,697
[groovy music]
168
00:06:45,572 --> 00:06:47,707
Why the long face?
169
00:06:47,707 --> 00:06:49,509
Jeremy's around here bein'
a handyman
170
00:06:49,509 --> 00:06:51,278
for everybody but me.
171
00:06:51,645 --> 00:06:53,713
Ooh, I know that feeling.
172
00:06:53,713 --> 00:06:56,750
My fourth husband loved
his toolbelt.
173
00:06:56,750 --> 00:06:58,652
But I found out he was using
his wrench
174
00:06:58,652 --> 00:07:00,754
on somebody else's nuts and
bolts.
175
00:07:02,088 --> 00:07:05,892
You have no idea what it's like
to wake up on a leaning bed!
176
00:07:05,892 --> 00:07:08,995
I have recurring dreams that
I'm slidin' down a hill.
177
00:07:09,329 --> 00:07:10,664
Then I wake up and realize
178
00:07:10,664 --> 00:07:12,766
I've actually fallen on
the floor.
179
00:07:12,766 --> 00:07:15,935
I have an idea that would get
Jeremy to knock out
180
00:07:15,935 --> 00:07:18,038
that honey-do list in
three days.
181
00:07:18,038 --> 00:07:19,606
Ooh, honey, do tell.
182
00:07:21,775 --> 00:07:27,480
Hey, Sharetha,
dial Two Hunks with Trunks.
183
00:07:29,449 --> 00:07:30,617
Oh, girl.
184
00:07:30,617 --> 00:07:32,452
You a troublemaker.
185
00:07:33,420 --> 00:07:34,854
You gon' go or what?
186
00:07:34,854 --> 00:07:37,657
I don't care what you say,
I got my four tricks.
187
00:07:38,391 --> 00:07:41,428
Hell will freeze over before you
get more tricks than me, Reggie.
188
00:07:41,428 --> 00:07:44,230
Right, and our tricks come
with diamonds.
189
00:07:44,230 --> 00:07:45,465
Bam!
190
00:07:48,234 --> 00:07:50,637
Reggie, stick with taco trucks,
191
00:07:50,637 --> 00:07:52,105
'cause cards ain't in
the cards for you.
192
00:07:52,105 --> 00:07:55,375
I was undefeated in competitive
crazy eights
193
00:07:55,375 --> 00:07:56,710
two years in a row!
194
00:07:56,710 --> 00:07:59,512
I got the Mr. Crazy award.
195
00:07:59,512 --> 00:08:01,047
Yeah, you are crazy.
196
00:08:02,282 --> 00:08:04,117
I think I have it in the bag!
197
00:08:04,117 --> 00:08:06,853
I hope you keep it on your face
so we don't have to see you.
198
00:08:07,987 --> 00:08:10,256
So, you got the job at
the museum?
199
00:08:10,256 --> 00:08:12,392
Well, a good chance.
200
00:08:12,392 --> 00:08:14,728
Uh, uh, one of the panelists
said to me
201
00:08:14,728 --> 00:08:17,397
that I have exactly what
they're looking for.
202
00:08:17,397 --> 00:08:19,165
-Ah.
-Well, I love art.
203
00:08:19,599 --> 00:08:22,369
I was a nude model for
young art students.
204
00:08:23,136 --> 00:08:25,171
Really?
Was it the School for the Blind?
205
00:08:25,905 --> 00:08:27,874
I'm just askin' for a friend.
206
00:08:28,842 --> 00:08:31,010
Now I have to prepare for
my second interview.
207
00:08:31,010 --> 00:08:34,114
They want me to propose a,
an art exhibit.
208
00:08:34,114 --> 00:08:36,449
So, I need to find something
with,
209
00:08:36,449 --> 00:08:39,018
with depth and beauty and
purpose.
210
00:08:39,018 --> 00:08:41,788
Oh, that's easy, Karen.
You need to exhibit me.
211
00:08:43,289 --> 00:08:45,191
I got the roots DNA results!
212
00:08:45,191 --> 00:08:47,093
[exclaiming]
213
00:08:48,328 --> 00:08:51,898
Well, if you got
extraterrestrial in your blood,
214
00:08:51,898 --> 00:08:53,666
don't say I didn't warn you.
215
00:08:54,868 --> 00:08:57,804
Hey, remember, if you inherited
streets of gold,
216
00:08:57,804 --> 00:09:00,607
I'm the one put the roof
over your head and fed you.
217
00:09:00,607 --> 00:09:02,142
You ain't gave me a damn thing,
Brown.
218
00:09:02,142 --> 00:09:04,277
I pay to stay, okay?
219
00:09:04,277 --> 00:09:05,445
You ungrateful.
220
00:09:05,445 --> 00:09:06,546
Well, well, well, well?
221
00:09:06,546 --> 00:09:08,214
It says European.
222
00:09:08,848 --> 00:09:11,050
Oh, that's a shock!
Everybody, everybody shocked?
223
00:09:11,050 --> 00:09:12,786
-Everybody shocked!
-I'm shocked!
224
00:09:12,786 --> 00:09:15,088
[Mr. Brown] European?
225
00:09:15,088 --> 00:09:16,623
[indistinct]
226
00:09:16,623 --> 00:09:20,026
Sierra Leone, I knew I had
some French in my blood.
227
00:09:20,693 --> 00:09:23,196
That's why the ladies
love my kisses.
228
00:09:24,364 --> 00:09:27,734
Florence, Italy!
Home of the great Renaissance!
229
00:09:27,734 --> 00:09:29,502
And it's the home of the mafia.
230
00:09:29,869 --> 00:09:31,938
Is there somethin' you need
to tell us?
231
00:09:31,938 --> 00:09:34,607
Look at this right here.
Mozambique.
232
00:09:34,607 --> 00:09:36,743
I got hunters and gatherers
in my blood.
233
00:09:36,743 --> 00:09:40,246
We hunt foxy women
and we gather their goods.
234
00:09:41,781 --> 00:09:43,316
What is this?
235
00:09:43,316 --> 00:09:49,155
.0003% Mayotte?
236
00:09:49,155 --> 00:09:50,657
What?
237
00:09:51,257 --> 00:09:52,759
[All] Mayotte?
238
00:09:52,759 --> 00:09:54,627
Sound like
a crime syndicate to me.
239
00:09:54,627 --> 00:09:55,962
No, no, no,
it's near Madagascar.
240
00:09:55,962 --> 00:09:57,897
In the Mozambique Channel.
241
00:09:58,465 --> 00:10:01,134
Karen!
You are my sister!
242
00:10:03,636 --> 00:10:06,539
Which means you are one drop!
243
00:10:06,539 --> 00:10:08,208
One drop what?
244
00:10:08,208 --> 00:10:09,742
[All] She's Black!
245
00:10:09,742 --> 00:10:12,011
Oh, and proud!
246
00:10:18,827 --> 00:10:20,829
I had to pull an all-nighter.
247
00:10:20,829 --> 00:10:24,633
Ah, me and my third husband used
to do those quite often.
248
00:10:24,633 --> 00:10:26,468
Takes a lot of endurance.
249
00:10:27,335 --> 00:10:31,339
So, here's your, um, Roots,
Shaka Zulu,
250
00:10:31,339 --> 00:10:33,141
and Shaft in Africa.
251
00:10:34,009 --> 00:10:35,877
And here's your Motown
collection, Vinny.
252
00:10:35,877 --> 00:10:37,512
-Alright.
-I can just about
253
00:10:37,512 --> 00:10:39,247
snap on the beat.
254
00:10:39,648 --> 00:10:41,149
Hold on, Angela Doofus.
255
00:10:41,149 --> 00:10:42,751
Just because you got
a smidgen of us
256
00:10:42,751 --> 00:10:43,952
and a goo-gobs of them,
257
00:10:43,952 --> 00:10:46,154
it, it don't mean you in, okay?
258
00:10:47,155 --> 00:10:49,424
Exploring who you are
is exciting.
259
00:10:49,858 --> 00:10:52,594
I remember when I found out
my grandmother
260
00:10:52,594 --> 00:10:55,230
was a nutritionist
for the Tuskegee Airmen.
261
00:10:55,764 --> 00:10:57,299
Made me feel proud.
262
00:11:04,239 --> 00:11:06,708
You not gonna leave me
that far behind!
263
00:11:07,075 --> 00:11:10,011
I knew it was the end of
your 50-foot run
264
00:11:10,011 --> 00:11:12,280
when you stopped at
that doughnut shop, Mr. Brown.
265
00:11:12,280 --> 00:11:15,117
I'll have you to know these are
diet doughnuts.
266
00:11:15,117 --> 00:11:19,287
Hey Vinny, I see it says here
that you two share roots
267
00:11:19,287 --> 00:11:20,555
in the same origin.
268
00:11:20,555 --> 00:11:22,924
Huh?
Maybe you're distant cousins.
269
00:11:22,924 --> 00:11:25,160
Man, don't make me vomit up in
this room right here.
270
00:11:25,160 --> 00:11:27,295
How many white people do you
know
271
00:11:27,295 --> 00:11:29,765
who would be happy to know
they are part Black?
272
00:11:30,165 --> 00:11:34,636
Uh, Eminem, Vanilla Ice,
uh, Michael McDonald, and, uh...
273
00:11:34,636 --> 00:11:35,771
Teena Marie.
274
00:11:35,771 --> 00:11:37,272
Yeah, yeah.
Mm-hm, mm-hm.
275
00:11:37,272 --> 00:11:40,075
Well, who would've thought that
I had roots in Africa?
276
00:11:40,075 --> 00:11:42,844
Who would've thought?
Who woulda?
277
00:11:42,844 --> 00:11:44,579
I have so many questions.
278
00:11:44,579 --> 00:11:46,681
Well, ask away.
279
00:11:46,681 --> 00:11:48,383
I'm here for you, honey.
280
00:11:49,684 --> 00:11:52,320
Oh, thank you, Anastasia.
281
00:11:52,954 --> 00:11:56,858
Now, do we prefer Black or
African American?
282
00:11:58,527 --> 00:12:00,061
Girl, ask them.
283
00:12:00,662 --> 00:12:03,131
Okay, uh, look,
look here, Karen,
284
00:12:03,131 --> 00:12:05,834
you know you can change
the, the little check mark
285
00:12:05,834 --> 00:12:07,302
on your application now?
286
00:12:07,302 --> 00:12:08,336
'Cause you one drop.
287
00:12:08,336 --> 00:12:09,504
Yeah, and if you do that,
288
00:12:09,504 --> 00:12:11,306
you gon' have to change the name
of the museum
289
00:12:11,306 --> 00:12:13,241
to the Broke, Busted,
and Disgusted.
290
00:12:13,675 --> 00:12:15,577
Well, maybe that's what I'll
call
291
00:12:15,577 --> 00:12:17,078
my proposed exhibit,
292
00:12:17,078 --> 00:12:18,847
-and it'll feature you, Vinny.
-What the?
293
00:12:18,847 --> 00:12:21,049
Hey, another donation!
294
00:12:21,049 --> 00:12:26,221
I am $1,000 away from my goal
of building my first well
295
00:12:26,221 --> 00:12:28,657
for Grow and Raise the Roots!
296
00:12:28,657 --> 00:12:30,625
See, Efe, that's why you
a good person.
297
00:12:30,625 --> 00:12:31,960
The Lord is pleased with you.
298
00:12:31,960 --> 00:12:33,628
He gon' put a check by your name
in Heaven.
299
00:12:34,496 --> 00:12:36,898
You think the Lord can change
the water into wine
300
00:12:36,898 --> 00:12:38,600
and we could have a party?
301
00:12:38,600 --> 00:12:39,901
I know some freaks.
302
00:12:39,901 --> 00:12:41,870
You know, he gon' put a skull
by your name
303
00:12:41,870 --> 00:12:43,038
and send you to Hell.
304
00:12:43,038 --> 00:12:45,073
Oh, I've been there.
They party.
305
00:12:45,073 --> 00:12:47,409
-You just hateful.
-I try bein' nice,
306
00:12:47,409 --> 00:12:48,710
but heathen comes out.
307
00:12:48,710 --> 00:12:50,278
You just hateful and heathen.
308
00:12:51,813 --> 00:12:54,149
[Karen] I call my exhibit
The Unforgotten,
309
00:12:54,616 --> 00:12:58,119
featuring African artists
whose works were plundered
310
00:12:58,119 --> 00:13:00,689
by the colonial empires
and sold.
311
00:13:01,489 --> 00:13:05,760
There are many paintings
and, uh, stripweave textiles
312
00:13:05,760 --> 00:13:07,262
from the southeast.
313
00:13:07,262 --> 00:13:09,898
You have many wonderful artists
here!
314
00:13:10,365 --> 00:13:14,236
Yes, I studied them all
many years ago.
315
00:13:14,236 --> 00:13:18,673
Ahh, you will make
an excellent curator.
316
00:13:18,673 --> 00:13:20,775
-Oh, thank you!
-No, my sister,
317
00:13:20,775 --> 00:13:22,344
this is wonderful.
318
00:13:22,344 --> 00:13:34,155
[wacky music]
319
00:13:34,856 --> 00:13:37,759
[Anastasia] If you need help
screwing that in, let me know.
320
00:13:38,193 --> 00:13:41,162
I've got really soft hands
and a tight grip.
321
00:13:41,162 --> 00:13:44,232
I'll have that knob ready to go
in no time.
322
00:13:49,004 --> 00:13:53,308
Ms. Anastasia, leave those hunks
alone.
323
00:13:53,308 --> 00:13:55,443
They have a lot of work to do
around here.
324
00:13:55,443 --> 00:13:56,745
I know.
325
00:13:56,745 --> 00:14:00,048
There's nothing like watching
a hard man do hard work.
326
00:14:01,616 --> 00:14:03,118
Yeah?
327
00:14:04,386 --> 00:14:06,121
Oh, wow.
Mm.
328
00:14:07,389 --> 00:14:09,224
Mm...
329
00:14:11,059 --> 00:14:15,497
If you wanna work on me next,
just bring your hammer
330
00:14:15,497 --> 00:14:17,065
and I'll be the nail.
331
00:14:19,868 --> 00:14:21,603
-Leah?
-Yeah?
332
00:14:21,603 --> 00:14:24,139
What is the incredible bulk
doin' in my kitchen
333
00:14:24,139 --> 00:14:26,675
and Arnold Schwartzenegro
doin' in my bedroom?
334
00:14:26,675 --> 00:14:28,043
Alright, you know what?
See?
335
00:14:28,043 --> 00:14:29,844
I noticed how busy you were,
336
00:14:29,844 --> 00:14:33,581
so I thought I'd just, you know,
outsource your honey-do list.
337
00:14:33,581 --> 00:14:36,718
Well, your honey-didn't-do
list, actually.
338
00:14:36,718 --> 00:14:38,153
See?
They almost done.
339
00:14:38,153 --> 00:14:40,255
Only two boxes left to check
off.
340
00:14:40,255 --> 00:14:44,859
The storage room, and ooh,
my Leanin' Tower of Sleep bed!
341
00:14:44,859 --> 00:14:46,161
-Mm-mm, no.
-Yes.
342
00:14:46,161 --> 00:14:48,596
Mr. Chunky ain't touchin'
my bed slats, no way.
343
00:14:48,596 --> 00:14:49,764
Why not?
344
00:14:49,764 --> 00:14:50,966
I mean, you don't seem to care
345
00:14:50,966 --> 00:14:52,968
that I end up wakin' up on
the floor.
346
00:14:56,071 --> 00:14:58,907
Thank, thank you.
Um...
347
00:14:58,907 --> 00:15:01,142
I'm experienced in breaking
beds.
348
00:15:01,142 --> 00:15:02,978
I'll have you safe, stable,
and firm in no time.
349
00:15:02,978 --> 00:15:04,179
-Wow.
-And we'll be sure to
350
00:15:04,179 --> 00:15:05,880
test it out for you
when we're done.
351
00:15:05,880 --> 00:15:06,915
Oh, great!
352
00:15:06,915 --> 00:15:08,183
What you mean, great?
353
00:15:08,183 --> 00:15:09,617
That's, that's sexual harassment
right there.
354
00:15:09,617 --> 00:15:11,086
What you mean, test it out
when you're...?
355
00:15:11,086 --> 00:15:12,620
Look, man, you got to go.
356
00:15:12,620 --> 00:15:14,322
You, Mr. Cradle Cap...
357
00:15:15,523 --> 00:15:18,560
-Oh my God.
-Hey, hey, get outta here.
358
00:15:18,560 --> 00:15:19,761
Come on.
359
00:15:19,761 --> 00:15:21,429
Mr. Swole-for-No-Reason?
360
00:15:23,665 --> 00:15:25,333
Grab your tools, beat it.
361
00:15:26,368 --> 00:15:28,403
What?
Ain't nobody scared of y'all.
362
00:15:28,770 --> 00:15:30,772
What, y'all gonna jump me?
363
00:15:30,772 --> 00:15:32,540
-Alright, okay.
-Hey...
364
00:15:32,540 --> 00:15:33,875
Huh?
He was big.
365
00:15:33,875 --> 00:15:36,077
Yeah, he was, but look at him,
look at her, look at her.
366
00:15:36,077 --> 00:15:37,645
Ms. Anastasia.
367
00:15:39,247 --> 00:15:40,648
What are you doing?
368
00:15:41,750 --> 00:15:42,784
Oh my goodness.
369
00:15:42,784 --> 00:15:44,119
Okay, babe, listen,
370
00:15:44,119 --> 00:15:45,787
but I don't wanna wait another
three months
371
00:15:45,787 --> 00:15:47,288
to get our bed fixed.
372
00:15:47,288 --> 00:15:48,890
Three months, you know I can do
this in three minutes.
373
00:15:48,890 --> 00:15:49,891
Uh...
374
00:15:49,891 --> 00:15:51,059
You think so?
375
00:15:51,059 --> 00:15:53,194
-Yes.
-Mm.
376
00:15:55,296 --> 00:15:58,266
You, you, you need some help?
377
00:15:58,266 --> 00:15:59,868
Nah, I just gotta get
a better grip.
378
00:15:59,868 --> 00:16:01,369
I've got a good grip.
379
00:16:01,369 --> 00:16:03,071
No need to use it now,
since you kicked out
380
00:16:03,071 --> 00:16:04,672
my future ninth and tenth
husbands.
381
00:16:08,610 --> 00:16:09,711
Yeesh.
382
00:16:09,711 --> 00:16:10,912
You know what, babe?
383
00:16:10,912 --> 00:16:12,747
Actually, can you, um,
go to the garage
384
00:16:12,747 --> 00:16:14,315
and get my gloves, please?
385
00:16:14,315 --> 00:16:16,017
Oh, it's, is it too heavy?
386
00:16:16,017 --> 00:16:18,119
No, no, no, I just don't wanna
get splinters.
387
00:16:18,119 --> 00:16:20,688
-Mm-hm.
-Oh, splinters, okay.
388
00:16:20,688 --> 00:16:23,324
Well, those guys carried it in
barehanded,
389
00:16:23,691 --> 00:16:26,761
and, um, yeah, they didn't need
any help.
390
00:16:27,395 --> 00:16:30,498
Please go to the garage
and grab my gloves, thank you.
391
00:16:30,498 --> 00:16:32,300
-Going to garage...
-[Jeremy] Thanks.
392
00:16:32,300 --> 00:16:33,601
-To grab your gloves.
-Yes.
393
00:16:33,868 --> 00:16:36,004
-Please and thank you.
-Mm-hm, yes.
394
00:16:36,004 --> 00:16:37,572
-You gon' fix my bed?
-Yep.
395
00:16:37,572 --> 00:16:38,473
-I got it.
-Okay.
396
00:16:38,473 --> 00:16:39,808
Just go get the gloves, please.
397
00:16:39,808 --> 00:16:41,009
Okay.
398
00:16:41,009 --> 00:16:42,343
Ms., Ms. Anastasia?
399
00:16:45,980 --> 00:16:49,117
Philip!
Philip!
400
00:16:50,485 --> 00:16:51,953
Yes, Dad?
401
00:16:51,953 --> 00:16:53,955
Hurry up and help me with this
before your mother come back.
402
00:16:53,955 --> 00:16:55,390
Ah, I can't.
403
00:16:55,390 --> 00:16:56,958
Chilecia doesn't like
calloused hands.
404
00:16:57,625 --> 00:16:59,494
Why don't you get one of them
Michelin men to do it?
405
00:16:59,494 --> 00:17:01,362
Because I told your mother
I would do it.
406
00:17:01,830 --> 00:17:03,264
Okay, then why you askin' me?
407
00:17:03,264 --> 00:17:04,899
Do you wanna eat again?!
408
00:17:05,266 --> 00:17:06,801
Come on, man.
Grab it!
409
00:17:08,870 --> 00:17:10,605
[Philip] Don't throw out
your back.
410
00:17:10,605 --> 00:17:12,273
-You good?
-Yeah!
411
00:17:12,273 --> 00:17:13,808
Where we takin' 'em?
412
00:17:14,609 --> 00:17:15,844
To the bed.
413
00:17:15,844 --> 00:17:19,214
[smooth music]
414
00:17:19,214 --> 00:17:22,150
This the kid who was raised
by a robot.
415
00:17:22,150 --> 00:17:25,053
Presumably, he's programmed to
identify stupid
416
00:17:25,053 --> 00:17:26,688
before a person opens
their mouth.
417
00:17:26,688 --> 00:17:30,125
That's Mr. Brown's life story.
I've seen this several times.
418
00:17:31,559 --> 00:17:35,029
Ugh, $1,000 short of
my donation goal.
419
00:17:35,029 --> 00:17:36,798
-Oh...
-[Vinny] Mm.
420
00:17:38,399 --> 00:17:40,835
Ah, hey, there's my sister!
421
00:17:40,835 --> 00:17:42,504
Ah!
How did it go, hm?
422
00:17:42,504 --> 00:17:44,639
Come on, chill out,
read the room.
423
00:17:44,639 --> 00:17:47,075
When a woman walks in the room
lookin' that wore out,
424
00:17:47,075 --> 00:17:49,110
either she's had a bad day
425
00:17:49,110 --> 00:17:51,279
or Vinny put it on her, man.
426
00:17:52,280 --> 00:17:54,983
My proposed exhibit went
flawlessly,
427
00:17:55,617 --> 00:17:58,153
and I answered every question
correctly.
428
00:17:58,153 --> 00:17:59,787
So, why so glum?
429
00:17:59,787 --> 00:18:02,957
Well, things just didn't turn
out the way I'd planned.
430
00:18:02,957 --> 00:18:04,492
[indistinct],
431
00:18:04,492 --> 00:18:06,828
I'm so sorry things didn't work
out the way you wanted.
432
00:18:07,829 --> 00:18:09,631
Because they turned out better!
433
00:18:11,733 --> 00:18:15,136
You're looking at the new
part-time museum curator!
434
00:18:15,136 --> 00:18:17,138
Oh, dream come true!
435
00:18:17,906 --> 00:18:19,107
Well done!
436
00:18:19,107 --> 00:18:20,341
And that's not the best part.
437
00:18:20,341 --> 00:18:22,110
You're movin' out?
438
00:18:23,411 --> 00:18:26,948
I told them about your campaign,
Efe.
439
00:18:26,948 --> 00:18:29,150
And they made a donation!
440
00:18:29,150 --> 00:18:32,620
$1,000 to Grow and
Raise the Root?!
441
00:18:32,620 --> 00:18:33,922
Yes!
442
00:18:33,922 --> 00:18:35,490
It's enough to build my well!
443
00:18:36,424 --> 00:18:37,825
Oh, thank you so much!
444
00:18:37,825 --> 00:18:39,060
You know what, Karen?
445
00:18:39,060 --> 00:18:41,296
You might be alright after all,
girl.
446
00:18:42,430 --> 00:18:44,332
The struggle is real.
447
00:18:45,233 --> 00:18:47,302
Don't mind him, Karen.
448
00:18:49,680 --> 00:18:51,582
[groovy music]
449
00:18:51,582 --> 00:18:53,684
Baby!
What are you doin'?
450
00:18:53,684 --> 00:18:56,287
Yeah, I'm doin' that
Hunky Dude workout,
451
00:18:56,287 --> 00:18:58,088
I, uh, followed them on IG.
452
00:18:58,622 --> 00:19:01,258
You got a little jealous,
didn't you?
453
00:19:01,258 --> 00:19:02,793
They ain't got nothin' on this.
454
00:19:02,793 --> 00:19:05,062
I picked up the wood planks by
myself with one hand.
455
00:19:05,062 --> 00:19:07,564
Oh, okay, then.
456
00:19:07,564 --> 00:19:10,401
Ah... Mom,
do you have any hand exfoliant?
457
00:19:10,401 --> 00:19:12,970
Them wood planks gave me
callouses,
458
00:19:12,970 --> 00:19:14,638
and Chilecia won't even hold
my hand.
459
00:19:14,638 --> 00:19:17,308
Ah, you picked up
those wood planks
460
00:19:17,308 --> 00:19:18,709
with one hand, alright.
461
00:19:18,709 --> 00:19:20,644
Was I, was I not supposed to say
nothin'?
462
00:19:20,644 --> 00:19:21,912
Get out.
463
00:19:24,882 --> 00:19:27,751
Alright, look, I'm sorry I
didn't pay more attention
464
00:19:27,751 --> 00:19:29,019
to your honey-do list.
465
00:19:29,019 --> 00:19:31,822
Mm-hm.
Apology accepted.
466
00:19:32,623 --> 00:19:35,526
Hey, I say we change your name
from honey-do list
467
00:19:35,526 --> 00:19:38,796
to honey-let's-do-it list.
468
00:19:39,129 --> 00:19:42,066
You better get back to
your workout, boy.
469
00:19:42,866 --> 00:19:45,936
Nah, bench pressin' your wife
is step number two.
470
00:19:45,936 --> 00:19:48,172
Oh okay, well, you know you
like big girls,
471
00:19:48,172 --> 00:19:49,840
so you better get your weight
up.
472
00:19:54,845 --> 00:19:56,747
Yup, I'm ready.
473
00:19:59,550 --> 00:20:02,519
Now that you are African,
or have African blood,
474
00:20:02,519 --> 00:20:04,455
I'm going to teach you a dance,
okay?
475
00:20:04,455 --> 00:20:06,323
For old people like us.
476
00:20:06,323 --> 00:20:08,092
It's called Etighi.
477
00:20:08,092 --> 00:20:12,029
-Etighi.
-Etighi.
478
00:20:12,029 --> 00:20:13,630
-Etighi.
-Hey!
479
00:20:13,630 --> 00:20:15,165
Okay, so keep your hand like
this,
480
00:20:15,165 --> 00:20:16,467
and keep your leg straight.
481
00:20:16,467 --> 00:20:18,769
And you're going to use your
hip.
482
00:20:18,769 --> 00:20:21,238
Hip, lift your leg up.
483
00:20:21,238 --> 00:20:24,675
One, two, one, two,
one, two, one, two.
484
00:20:24,675 --> 00:20:26,744
Hey, hey!
Yes!
485
00:20:27,044 --> 00:20:29,513
Hey, look at you!
486
00:20:29,513 --> 00:20:31,682
With the hip, don't break it.
487
00:20:31,682 --> 00:20:33,584
With your hand.
488
00:20:33,584 --> 00:20:35,619
Ah, you're too African!
489
00:20:36,954 --> 00:20:38,655
Well done.
Okay, okay.
490
00:20:38,655 --> 00:20:40,758
Now the next dance I'm going to
teach you
491
00:20:40,758 --> 00:20:42,559
is Azonto.
492
00:20:42,559 --> 00:20:45,295
You know, I've only been Black
for 24 hours.
493
00:20:45,662 --> 00:20:48,132
So, I think one is enough.
494
00:20:48,132 --> 00:20:49,933
Okay, okay, okay.
We'll stick to Etighi?
495
00:20:49,933 --> 00:20:51,301
-Okay.
-Etighi.
496
00:20:51,301 --> 00:20:54,304
Hey, Etighi.
Hey, Etighi.
497
00:20:55,339 --> 00:20:58,876
[music]
498
00:21:25,069 --> 00:21:26,437
[music]
499
00:21:27,138 --> 00:21:28,906
[music]