1
00:00:16,726 --> 00:00:18,853
[Harriet] This is my favorite tooth.
2
00:00:19,813 --> 00:00:21,356
Why do I love it so much?
3
00:00:22,440 --> 00:00:23,525
Well...
4
00:00:24,526 --> 00:00:26,653
for starters, it wasn't flashy.
5
00:00:26,653 --> 00:00:29,239
You won't see it in my dazzling smile.
6
00:00:32,074 --> 00:00:34,286
[growls, barks]
7
00:00:34,286 --> 00:00:37,038
But you might see it
in my dog-scaring face.
8
00:00:37,038 --> 00:00:38,081
[growls]
9
00:00:38,081 --> 00:00:40,250
There it is, right there.
10
00:00:40,250 --> 00:00:42,794
It's peeking out from behind my lip
like a bulldog.
11
00:00:42,794 --> 00:00:45,171
[growls, whimpers]
12
00:00:48,925 --> 00:00:53,847
It doesn't just cut like the
front teeth or chew like the back teeth.
13
00:00:53,847 --> 00:00:56,224
This amazing tooth does both.
14
00:00:57,559 --> 00:01:01,855
I also like how it's a little askew,
just like me. [chuckles]
15
00:01:02,689 --> 00:01:04,356
My dentist called the tooth...
16
00:01:04,356 --> 00:01:07,110
Primary cuspid R
with two anterior fillings.
17
00:01:07,110 --> 00:01:09,112
[Harriet] But I call him...
18
00:01:10,030 --> 00:01:12,407
General Mouthwashington.
19
00:01:13,909 --> 00:01:16,578
{\an8}♪ I just wanna be
You just wanna be ♪
20
00:01:16,578 --> 00:01:18,330
♪ We just wanna be ♪
21
00:01:19,456 --> 00:01:21,917
♪ I am gonna be who I wanna be ♪
22
00:01:21,917 --> 00:01:23,585
♪ My autonomy ♪
23
00:01:24,085 --> 00:01:27,005
♪ No, I won't cut my hair ♪
24
00:01:27,005 --> 00:01:29,466
♪ And I'll wear whatever ♪
25
00:01:29,466 --> 00:01:35,597
♪ I like it when I get to be myself ♪
26
00:01:35,597 --> 00:01:38,225
♪ I don't wanna be
You don't wanna be ♪
27
00:01:38,225 --> 00:01:42,270
{\an8}♪ We don't wanna be told what to do ♪
28
00:01:45,482 --> 00:01:49,236
[Harriet] Something I think about:
Teeth are not bones.
29
00:01:49,236 --> 00:01:53,531
Isn't that interesting?
Teeth are not bones.
30
00:01:54,658 --> 00:01:57,786
[Ole Golly] Harriet, you're going to be
late to your dentist appointment
31
00:01:57,786 --> 00:01:59,621
if we don't leave now.
32
00:02:01,706 --> 00:02:04,125
[Harriet]
Bones break and repair themselves.
33
00:02:04,125 --> 00:02:07,963
Teeth can't do that.
You really gotta cherish a tooth.
34
00:02:13,426 --> 00:02:15,762
[dad] Carol, this is unbelievable.
35
00:02:15,762 --> 00:02:17,430
[Carol] You're overreacting.
36
00:02:17,430 --> 00:02:19,808
You can't throw out our wedding cake.
37
00:02:20,642 --> 00:02:24,229
It's been in the icebox for 12 years.
We're never gonna eat it.
38
00:02:25,146 --> 00:02:27,899
We ate it on our five-year anniversary.
39
00:02:27,899 --> 00:02:30,068
Yes, and that was seven years ago.
40
00:02:30,068 --> 00:02:32,612
It's like you wanna throw our marriage
in the trash.
41
00:02:32,612 --> 00:02:33,989
[sighs]
42
00:02:33,989 --> 00:02:36,908
Ole Golly says
it's healthy for grown-ups to fight.
43
00:02:36,908 --> 00:02:39,786
Just like kids,
they gotta get their gripes out.
44
00:02:39,786 --> 00:02:43,331
Harriet, stop rubbernecking and let's go.
45
00:02:51,089 --> 00:02:52,424
Looking good, Harriet.
46
00:02:52,424 --> 00:02:56,177
You must really be rinsing and brushing
right after your chocolate egg creams.
47
00:02:56,177 --> 00:02:58,471
Dental hygiene is what I'm all about.
48
00:03:00,307 --> 00:03:02,267
Dr. Hawthorne will be in shortly.
49
00:03:03,727 --> 00:03:08,023
[Harriet]
Dr. Hawthorne. Yes, you heard right.
50
00:03:08,023 --> 00:03:12,068
My dentist is none other
than Marion Hawthorne's dad.
51
00:03:12,068 --> 00:03:16,156
[groans]
Perfect Marion and her perfect teeth.
52
00:03:16,156 --> 00:03:17,824
There was no escaping her.
53
00:03:18,408 --> 00:03:20,660
But at least my teeth were perfect too.
54
00:03:26,416 --> 00:03:30,629
Hello, Dr. Hawthorne. Take a look. Ah--
55
00:03:30,629 --> 00:03:33,256
You can close your mouth for now, Harriet.
56
00:03:33,256 --> 00:03:34,841
We need to talk.
57
00:03:35,967 --> 00:03:37,594
What do we need to talk about?
58
00:03:37,594 --> 00:03:39,262
I took a look at your X-rays
59
00:03:39,262 --> 00:03:43,433
and determined that
primary cuspid R needs to be extracted.
60
00:03:44,059 --> 00:03:49,022
Primary cuspid R?
You mean General Mouthwashington?
61
00:03:49,022 --> 00:03:50,565
Uh, General who?
62
00:03:50,565 --> 00:03:54,694
Can you check again? I brushed.
I flossed. I mouthwashed. I was good.
63
00:03:55,195 --> 00:03:56,363
[Harriet] For the record,
64
00:03:56,363 --> 00:03:58,949
I wasn't always so good
with my dental hygiene.
65
00:03:59,658 --> 00:04:03,787
When I was seven, I was just a dumb kid
playing it fast and loose with my teeth.
66
00:04:06,998 --> 00:04:10,835
[Ole Golly] Harriet, it's lights-out time.
Did you remember to floss?
67
00:04:10,835 --> 00:04:15,173
[gulps] Why, of course, Ole Golly.
68
00:04:15,173 --> 00:04:18,593
But my recklessness caught up to me
with a vengeance.
69
00:04:18,593 --> 00:04:22,806
Primary cuspid R
appears to have two anterior cavities.
70
00:04:23,723 --> 00:04:27,727
Oh, that's what you get for flossing
with licorice. You messed up.
71
00:04:33,692 --> 00:04:38,989
I did mess up, didn't I?
I messed up real good. [sighs]
72
00:04:38,989 --> 00:04:41,783
I'm sorry, little tooth.
73
00:04:41,783 --> 00:04:44,953
[Harriet] Then something
kind of brain-bending happened.
74
00:04:44,953 --> 00:04:47,747
[General Mouthwashington]
It is not time for apologies.
75
00:04:47,747 --> 00:04:49,207
Hey. Who said that?
76
00:04:49,207 --> 00:04:50,292
[Harriet] It might have been
77
00:04:50,292 --> 00:04:52,878
because we were studying
the American Revolution in school.
78
00:04:52,878 --> 00:04:53,962
I don't know.
79
00:04:53,962 --> 00:04:55,922
[General Mouthwashington]
It is time to defeat
80
00:04:55,922 --> 00:04:59,009
the insidious outsider
colonizing our mouth,
81
00:04:59,009 --> 00:05:01,177
the tartar and plaque redcoats.
82
00:05:01,177 --> 00:05:04,639
It is I, General Mouthwashington.
83
00:05:04,639 --> 00:05:07,851
[Harriet] That was the moment
I met my new best friend and hero.
84
00:05:07,851 --> 00:05:10,353
His was a call to arms to rally together.
85
00:05:10,353 --> 00:05:11,855
We thereby declared...
86
00:05:11,855 --> 00:05:16,192
[both] Independence from bad oral hygiene.
87
00:05:19,195 --> 00:05:21,072
- [teeth soldiers shouting]
- Charge!
88
00:05:22,616 --> 00:05:25,744
[whimpers] Oh, no! Oh, dear.
89
00:05:25,744 --> 00:05:28,371
[yelps] I'm getting the collywobbles.
90
00:05:32,709 --> 00:05:33,960
[shouting continues]
91
00:05:35,253 --> 00:05:38,715
Not the giant brush. [shouts]
92
00:05:40,634 --> 00:05:42,052
[grunting]
93
00:05:43,553 --> 00:05:47,432
Blimey! Have you infernal rebels no mercy?
94
00:05:48,058 --> 00:05:50,894
- Begone, foul oppressor!
- [whimpering, groaning]
95
00:05:52,646 --> 00:05:54,689
[shouting continues]
96
00:05:59,945 --> 00:06:05,700
We shall form a more perfect Union
based on these unalienable rights:
97
00:06:05,700 --> 00:06:07,994
- life, liberty and...
- [spits]
98
00:06:07,994 --> 00:06:11,706
[both] The pursuit of oral cleanliness.
99
00:06:11,706 --> 00:06:15,835
[whimpering] Blimey! Collywobbles!
100
00:06:17,295 --> 00:06:20,131
[Harriet] After that initial victory,
our Union was strong,
101
00:06:20,131 --> 00:06:22,509
and dental visits were short and sweet.
102
00:06:22,509 --> 00:06:26,263
And I owed it all
to General Mouthwashington.
103
00:06:26,263 --> 00:06:29,307
Oh, Harriet.
I know this is difficult but--
104
00:06:29,307 --> 00:06:33,853
But nothing!
Why do I need the General extracted?
105
00:06:33,853 --> 00:06:36,940
It doesn't make any sense.
It's not like it has any pain.
106
00:06:37,524 --> 00:06:38,567
May I?
107
00:06:40,777 --> 00:06:42,571
Undignified!
108
00:06:43,071 --> 00:06:48,618
Ow! Okay, so it hurts when you touch it.
I just won't touch it. Problem solved.
109
00:06:48,618 --> 00:06:51,329
Maybe these X-rays can help explain
the situation.
110
00:06:51,329 --> 00:06:55,917
This cuspid here, it's boxed in
with an adult tooth on the left,
111
00:06:55,917 --> 00:06:59,671
another on the right and a new adult tooth
coming in from below.
112
00:06:59,671 --> 00:07:03,466
Dear me! It's really being budged out.
113
00:07:03,466 --> 00:07:06,887
I'm sorry, Harriet. It's time.
114
00:07:06,887 --> 00:07:09,723
The general must leave his post.
115
00:07:10,223 --> 00:07:11,725
Can I get a second opinion?
116
00:07:11,725 --> 00:07:15,812
You can ask any DDS in Manhattan,
and they'll all say the same.
117
00:07:15,812 --> 00:07:18,899
The pain will only get worse
if you don't remove that tooth now.
118
00:07:19,691 --> 00:07:20,942
Now?
119
00:07:20,942 --> 00:07:23,820
O-Ole Golly,
t-tell him I need an extension.
120
00:07:23,820 --> 00:07:26,573
A year? A month? I'll even take a week.
121
00:07:27,282 --> 00:07:28,992
I can give you till tomorrow.
122
00:07:32,078 --> 00:07:34,623
Hey, chin up. It's your last baby tooth.
123
00:07:34,623 --> 00:07:38,001
After this, it's a full set of adult teeth
for Harriet M. Welsch.
124
00:07:38,752 --> 00:07:41,004
Time to grow up, you big baby.
125
00:07:47,010 --> 00:07:48,595
- [tires screech]
- [horn honks]
126
00:07:49,346 --> 00:07:52,182
[grunts] So, it's official.
127
00:07:52,182 --> 00:07:54,643
Marion's dad says
I have to go back to his office tomorrow
128
00:07:54,643 --> 00:07:58,104
so he can get rid of
General Mouthwashington.
129
00:07:58,688 --> 00:08:01,650
- [both] What?
- He says there's no room for him anymore.
130
00:08:02,817 --> 00:08:05,654
We need to talk about this. [grunts]
131
00:08:06,238 --> 00:08:08,073
[laughs, grunts]
132
00:08:09,324 --> 00:08:10,492
Yes!
133
00:08:10,492 --> 00:08:12,577
Initiate intentional out plan.
134
00:08:12,577 --> 00:08:17,332
No! No, you initiated way too many
intentional out plans this year.
135
00:08:18,541 --> 00:08:20,919
It's an insult to the game of dodgeball.
136
00:08:21,461 --> 00:08:22,671
What are you doing?
137
00:08:22,671 --> 00:08:25,840
Whatever you gotta do, do it behind me.
138
00:08:25,840 --> 00:08:27,175
I'll shield ya.
139
00:08:29,719 --> 00:08:30,720
[gasps]
140
00:08:36,058 --> 00:08:38,227
So, there's no room
for Mouthwashington, huh?
141
00:08:38,227 --> 00:08:40,813
Well, what if we made room?
142
00:08:40,813 --> 00:08:41,981
Is that possible?
143
00:08:41,981 --> 00:08:45,569
Sure! The human body has room
for all sorts of stuff it doesn't need,
144
00:08:45,569 --> 00:08:46,653
like the appendix.
145
00:08:46,653 --> 00:08:48,572
Medic! [groans]
146
00:08:49,447 --> 00:08:52,659
See? I knew I needed a second opinion.
How do we--
147
00:08:53,451 --> 00:08:55,954
Hold on. [panting]
148
00:08:55,954 --> 00:08:57,038
[grunts]
149
00:08:57,622 --> 00:09:01,543
Tell my mother I love her. [sighs]
150
00:09:04,963 --> 00:09:06,756
Ha! Gotcha.
151
00:09:08,967 --> 00:09:11,052
[panting]
152
00:09:11,553 --> 00:09:14,639
- Measuring tape?
- Okay, open wide.
153
00:09:14,639 --> 00:09:16,808
Uh. Ah-- [grunts]
154
00:09:16,808 --> 00:09:19,603
[Janie] Mouth-open capacity max
is currently three inches.
155
00:09:21,021 --> 00:09:22,230
I can work with that.
156
00:09:22,230 --> 00:09:24,149
Now, time to stretch.
157
00:09:24,858 --> 00:09:26,776
- Open, two, three, four.
- Ah.
158
00:09:26,776 --> 00:09:28,612
- Shut, two, three, four.
- [grunts]
159
00:09:28,612 --> 00:09:30,488
- Open, two, three, four.
- Ah.
160
00:09:30,488 --> 00:09:32,198
- Shut, two, three, four.
- [grunts]
161
00:09:32,198 --> 00:09:33,617
- Open, two, three, four--
- Ah.
162
00:09:33,617 --> 00:09:34,910
That's never gonna work.
163
00:09:34,910 --> 00:09:38,246
Don't listen to him.
Now, bare your teeth, Welsch.
164
00:09:38,830 --> 00:09:40,165
[grunts, growls]
165
00:09:40,165 --> 00:09:43,877
[pants] Yeah. I wanna see 'em all, all 28!
166
00:09:43,877 --> 00:09:46,379
[grunts] Gosh darn it, Sport! [grunts]
167
00:09:46,963 --> 00:09:48,632
Sorry. [grunts]
168
00:09:49,549 --> 00:09:50,759
[school bell rings]
169
00:09:50,759 --> 00:09:51,843
[Janie sighs]
170
00:09:51,843 --> 00:09:54,846
- Open, two, three, four.
- Ah.
171
00:09:54,846 --> 00:09:57,265
- Shut, two, three, four.
- [grunts]
172
00:09:57,265 --> 00:09:59,643
- Open, two, three, four.
- Ah.
173
00:09:59,643 --> 00:10:02,479
- Shut, two, three, four.
- [grunts]
174
00:10:02,479 --> 00:10:03,772
- Now--
- [sighs]
175
00:10:04,439 --> 00:10:06,942
[sighs] Just measure me.
176
00:10:09,361 --> 00:10:10,445
Ah.
177
00:10:11,112 --> 00:10:16,409
Oh! What do you know?
Still three inches. Sorry.
178
00:10:16,910 --> 00:10:19,955
It's hopeless.
We've been stretching all day.
179
00:10:20,538 --> 00:10:23,124
[sighs] I'm sorry, General.
180
00:10:23,959 --> 00:10:25,502
Ow! [inhales sharply]
181
00:10:26,044 --> 00:10:28,296
[sighs] What are we gonna do?
182
00:10:28,296 --> 00:10:31,633
I know! Maybe you could just
skip your appointment tomorrow.
183
00:10:32,133 --> 00:10:34,261
Ole Golly would never let me.
184
00:10:34,261 --> 00:10:39,349
Hmm. I know somebody
who might be able to convince her.
185
00:10:40,350 --> 00:10:43,687
Uh, sure, they tell us we should see
the dentist once every six months,
186
00:10:43,687 --> 00:10:45,814
but is that really necessary?
187
00:10:46,356 --> 00:10:49,568
[Harriet] Sport's dad is a writer.
He knows what he's talking about.
188
00:10:49,568 --> 00:10:51,695
Answer: no. [chuckles]
189
00:10:51,695 --> 00:10:54,698
The whole thing's a racket.
They just want our money.
190
00:10:54,698 --> 00:10:59,786
Oh, and they always use gingivitis
to scare us like some big, evil bogeyman.
191
00:10:59,786 --> 00:11:03,832
[Harriet] Gingivitis equals bogeyman.
So, not under bed?
192
00:11:04,416 --> 00:11:08,795
Yeah, my dad hasn't seen the dentist
in years, which works great for the books.
193
00:11:08,795 --> 00:11:10,672
No bills to reconcile.
194
00:11:11,715 --> 00:11:15,510
Mr. Rocque, you're the first grown-up
I've talked to who gets it.
195
00:11:15,510 --> 00:11:20,724
Hey, if any grown-up needs the wool pulled
off their eyes, I am happy to do it.
196
00:11:20,724 --> 00:11:23,268
Could you pull the wool
off my nanny's eyes?
197
00:11:23,268 --> 00:11:25,270
Show her that you don't go to the dentist,
198
00:11:25,270 --> 00:11:28,732
and you have a full set
of perfectly normal, healthy teeth.
199
00:11:29,316 --> 00:11:34,154
Ye-- Uh, I don't know if I'd say
I had a full set exactly.
200
00:11:35,071 --> 00:11:36,072
What do you mean?
201
00:11:38,658 --> 00:11:39,576
[all shout]
202
00:11:39,576 --> 00:11:42,287
How come you've been keeping this
a secret from me?
203
00:11:42,996 --> 00:11:45,582
[chuckles] I guess I didn't think
you could handle it.
204
00:11:47,083 --> 00:11:49,794
Dad, please! I can't handle it.
205
00:11:49,794 --> 00:11:51,963
No, no. Keep going. I kinda like it.
206
00:11:51,963 --> 00:11:53,048
[chuckles]
207
00:11:53,048 --> 00:11:54,883
[gasps] Ow.
208
00:11:54,883 --> 00:11:57,260
[gasps] Oh. Are you okay?
209
00:11:57,844 --> 00:12:02,390
No. My tooth hurts now
even without me touching it.
210
00:12:08,563 --> 00:12:10,065
Mm-hmm.
211
00:12:10,065 --> 00:12:12,817
- [groans, gags]
- See? It's inedible.
212
00:12:13,401 --> 00:12:17,572
[swallows]
Just as inedible as it was 12 years ago.
213
00:12:17,572 --> 00:12:18,907
And that's the point.
214
00:12:18,907 --> 00:12:20,575
[sighs] Here we go again.
215
00:12:22,160 --> 00:12:25,580
[groans] Ow.
216
00:12:26,998 --> 00:12:29,793
[chuckles]
The baker canceled at the last minute,
217
00:12:29,793 --> 00:12:32,712
so you and I,
having absolutely no experience,
218
00:12:32,712 --> 00:12:35,924
baked our own wedding cake together.
219
00:12:36,550 --> 00:12:38,510
Yes, I know. I was there.
220
00:12:38,510 --> 00:12:42,681
We had a great time,
but the cake was and still is terrible.
221
00:12:44,349 --> 00:12:46,476
I will not throw it out.
222
00:12:46,476 --> 00:12:48,770
Then you need to buy a second icebox.
223
00:12:50,313 --> 00:12:52,065
Ow.
224
00:12:52,065 --> 00:12:53,149
[Ole Golly] Harriet!
225
00:13:02,993 --> 00:13:03,994
What's all this?
226
00:13:03,994 --> 00:13:05,453
See for yourself.
227
00:13:10,000 --> 00:13:11,293
Whoa.
228
00:13:11,293 --> 00:13:14,880
[Harriet] I wanted to sink my teeth
into all that tomatoey goodness
229
00:13:14,880 --> 00:13:16,339
and savor every bite.
230
00:13:16,840 --> 00:13:17,841
But...
231
00:13:17,841 --> 00:13:19,968
I know what you're up to.
232
00:13:19,968 --> 00:13:23,471
This is supposed to be
one of those "last meal" things, isn't it?
233
00:13:24,055 --> 00:13:26,266
Well, you can call it whatever you like.
234
00:13:26,266 --> 00:13:30,270
Throw it in the trash.
Mouthwashington's not going anywhere.
235
00:13:30,854 --> 00:13:34,232
You're scared to eat it, aren't ya?
Afraid it'll hurt too much.
236
00:13:34,232 --> 00:13:36,067
[scoffs] No.
237
00:13:36,693 --> 00:13:39,070
[Harriet] Thing is, I-I kinda was scared.
238
00:13:39,070 --> 00:13:41,990
Good.
Because I'd hate to see it go to waste.
239
00:13:41,990 --> 00:13:47,871
Mmm, homemade mayo, freshly baked bread,
the ripest tomato you've ever seen.
240
00:13:47,871 --> 00:13:51,833
Why don't you put it to the general?
We don't have to call it a last meal.
241
00:13:59,132 --> 00:14:05,972
I hold this truth to be self-evident.
That is one magnificent tomato sandwich.
242
00:14:06,681 --> 00:14:09,976
[Harriet] So, we decided to eat it.
243
00:14:12,145 --> 00:14:15,315
I figured if I could just chew it
on one side of my mouth,
244
00:14:15,315 --> 00:14:17,067
it might not hurt that much.
245
00:14:23,114 --> 00:14:25,283
[scoffs] I'm not scared. I just--
246
00:14:26,368 --> 00:14:29,204
Th-There's a certain special way
I like to eat these.
247
00:14:33,416 --> 00:14:34,501
[Harriet] Ow. [shouts]
248
00:14:35,252 --> 00:14:37,546
Ow. It really, really hurts.
249
00:14:37,546 --> 00:14:40,590
I'm never gonna be able
to eat a tomato sandwich again.
250
00:14:40,590 --> 00:14:43,718
Harriet! Calm down.
You're going to be fine.
251
00:14:43,718 --> 00:14:46,346
Here, now suck on this.
It'll numb the pain.
252
00:14:48,181 --> 00:14:51,142
[moaning]
253
00:14:51,142 --> 00:14:54,980
That's helping. That's helping. Thank you.
254
00:14:54,980 --> 00:14:57,148
Look, I know it's hard,
255
00:14:57,148 --> 00:15:00,944
but General Mouthwashington
has given you everything he can.
256
00:15:00,944 --> 00:15:05,031
It's time for him to move on.
It's just a natural part of growing up.
257
00:15:05,031 --> 00:15:08,952
One day, after I've given you all I can,
well, I'll have to leave--
258
00:15:08,952 --> 00:15:12,247
Don't say it! [pants]
You're making it worse.
259
00:15:12,247 --> 00:15:16,585
Well, I'm only being honest,
and I thought you'd appreciate that.
260
00:15:16,585 --> 00:15:21,089
All the fuss in the world won't stop
these things from happening, nothing will.
261
00:15:21,089 --> 00:15:24,551
Part of growing up is learning to let go.
262
00:15:25,594 --> 00:15:28,972
[Harriet]
What Ole Golly said makes sense, but...
263
00:15:31,141 --> 00:15:33,768
Mouthwashington would never let me go.
264
00:15:33,768 --> 00:15:38,398
He took two fillings in his gut for me.
The pain was never too much for him.
265
00:15:38,398 --> 00:15:43,945
It is but a pittance to pay
for the blessings of our noble friendship.
266
00:15:45,280 --> 00:15:47,282
[Harriet]
So even though I didn't know where to go...
267
00:15:50,744 --> 00:15:51,745
[shouts]
268
00:15:51,745 --> 00:15:53,330
I ran away with the general,
269
00:15:53,330 --> 00:15:56,082
hoping against hope
to find a way to save him.
270
00:15:57,292 --> 00:15:58,877
It's what he'd do for me.
271
00:15:59,377 --> 00:16:00,545
[gasps]
272
00:16:07,510 --> 00:16:08,845
[moaning]
273
00:16:08,845 --> 00:16:11,264
- [slurping]
- Mmm.
274
00:16:11,264 --> 00:16:12,515
[moans]
275
00:16:13,725 --> 00:16:17,395
[Harriet] But no matter how far I went...
276
00:16:17,395 --> 00:16:20,315
[slurps] Oh, no.
277
00:16:21,233 --> 00:16:23,318
...I couldn't escape the pain.
278
00:16:23,318 --> 00:16:24,486
[whimpers]
279
00:16:24,986 --> 00:16:27,239
Ow! [shouts]
280
00:16:28,240 --> 00:16:32,702
Eventually, it got so bad that,
well, things got weird.
281
00:16:35,247 --> 00:16:36,248
[gasps]
282
00:16:37,791 --> 00:16:41,294
Mouthwashington,
did you chop down that cherry tree?
283
00:16:41,294 --> 00:16:44,506
Yes, I cannot tell a lie.
284
00:16:47,300 --> 00:16:49,594
- [gasps]
- [park ranger] You okay, little girl?
285
00:16:54,432 --> 00:16:59,688
Of course, he didn't do it.
He couldn't have. He's in my mouth!
286
00:17:07,279 --> 00:17:09,656
[Harriet] After I made it all the way down
to the docks,
287
00:17:09,656 --> 00:17:12,074
I knew there was nowhere left to run.
288
00:17:12,074 --> 00:17:16,204
I thought about getting on an ocean liner.
Pretty out there, I know.
289
00:17:16,204 --> 00:17:20,375
But when Washington crossed the Delaware,
that was pretty out there too.
290
00:17:23,085 --> 00:17:24,379
Margaret, wait!
291
00:17:27,841 --> 00:17:29,426
[Harriet] I had to see this.
292
00:17:33,763 --> 00:17:36,474
I told myself that
if he convinced her to stay,
293
00:17:36,474 --> 00:17:38,518
then the general would stay too.
294
00:17:39,102 --> 00:17:40,395
If not, well...
295
00:17:41,021 --> 00:17:42,731
I'm not asking you to stay.
296
00:17:43,315 --> 00:17:46,026
Just before you go,
there's something I have to say.
297
00:17:47,694 --> 00:17:49,237
Goodbye.
298
00:17:49,237 --> 00:17:51,031
[sniffles] Oh. [chuckles]
299
00:17:52,574 --> 00:17:55,660
[Harriet]
All of a sudden, I knew what I had to do.
300
00:17:57,120 --> 00:18:00,790
I gathered all my friends and family
for a grand goodbye party.
301
00:18:02,125 --> 00:18:04,419
I want everyone to tell
General Mouthwashington
302
00:18:04,419 --> 00:18:07,839
all the things they've always wanted
to say to him before he goes away.
303
00:18:08,882 --> 00:18:11,718
Anyone can start. Ah.
304
00:18:12,844 --> 00:18:15,597
The general is ah-waiting. Ah.
305
00:18:20,352 --> 00:18:23,063
You have to hurry up,
'cause I'm kind of in pain here.
306
00:18:24,231 --> 00:18:29,486
[exhales] Okay, uh, you know what?
Sport, how about you go first.
307
00:18:29,486 --> 00:18:31,363
Ah.
308
00:18:31,363 --> 00:18:32,948
Oh, um, okay.
309
00:18:32,948 --> 00:18:37,661
Well, one time, Harriet and I were
walking home together from school,
310
00:18:37,661 --> 00:18:39,871
and a garbage truck drove past.
311
00:18:40,497 --> 00:18:43,917
It kicked up a little stone
straight at Harriet's mouth.
312
00:18:43,917 --> 00:18:49,631
And I kid you not, that stone broke
right in two when it hit Mouthwashington.
313
00:18:50,131 --> 00:18:55,387
General, you are the strongest man--
I mean, tooth-- that I know.
314
00:18:55,387 --> 00:18:57,639
[chuckles] So sweet.
315
00:18:59,391 --> 00:19:02,435
[sighs]
I still have that stone in my room.
316
00:19:02,936 --> 00:19:07,482
Well,
I used to find American history boring.
317
00:19:07,482 --> 00:19:08,733
I'd get B's.
318
00:19:08,733 --> 00:19:12,946
Then I started imagining history
with Mouthwashington in it.
319
00:19:12,946 --> 00:19:14,906
Now, I get A's.
320
00:19:14,906 --> 00:19:16,533
[all chuckling]
321
00:19:17,659 --> 00:19:19,119
Thanks, General.
322
00:19:19,119 --> 00:19:20,537
Ow.
323
00:19:21,663 --> 00:19:25,834
Everyone knows General Mouthwashington
is a hero and a president,
324
00:19:25,834 --> 00:19:27,878
but do you also know he's humble?
325
00:19:27,878 --> 00:19:30,797
He's never bragged to me once.
326
00:19:31,298 --> 00:19:35,719
He's just quietly helped me out with the
noblest task of all:
327
00:19:36,887 --> 00:19:38,680
raising Harriet.
328
00:19:39,180 --> 00:19:41,349
[inhales shakily, sighs]
329
00:19:41,850 --> 00:19:45,520
[cries] I couldn't have done it
without you, Ole Golly.
330
00:19:48,148 --> 00:19:52,527
Forget John Adams.
You're my real VP. [crying]
331
00:19:55,655 --> 00:19:58,950
Ms. Catherine, thank you so much
for looking after Harriet.
332
00:19:58,950 --> 00:20:00,869
And, Harriet, I'm sorry.
333
00:20:00,869 --> 00:20:03,538
Your father and I have been squabbling
all day.
334
00:20:03,538 --> 00:20:06,416
We should have been there,
helping you let go.
335
00:20:06,416 --> 00:20:09,711
Actually, Harriet,
hearing all these stories, you--
336
00:20:09,711 --> 00:20:12,088
Well, you helped me.
337
00:20:12,631 --> 00:20:14,090
- I did?
- She did?
338
00:20:14,925 --> 00:20:18,762
Carol, you can throw out the cake.
It was never about the cake.
339
00:20:18,762 --> 00:20:21,640
It was about who we were
when we baked it together.
340
00:20:21,640 --> 00:20:23,475
Young, spontaneous.
341
00:20:23,475 --> 00:20:25,727
Oh, Fred, I-- [sighs]
342
00:20:25,727 --> 00:20:29,481
No, let me finish. I love who we are now.
343
00:20:29,481 --> 00:20:32,025
I just also want to remember who we were.
344
00:20:32,025 --> 00:20:37,364
But I don't need the cake for that.
I have the story, and I have you.
345
00:20:37,364 --> 00:20:40,659
Oh. [sighs]
346
00:20:42,494 --> 00:20:46,790
Uh, well, Mom and Dad, you sort of stole
the general's thunder there, but...
347
00:20:46,790 --> 00:20:48,208
[sighs] ...I get it.
348
00:20:48,833 --> 00:20:53,380
[Harriet]
I really did. In fact, at that moment,
349
00:20:53,880 --> 00:20:57,050
I figured something out
about the stories we tell.
350
00:20:58,009 --> 00:21:00,720
I wrote this whole big speech, but...
[sighs]
351
00:21:01,972 --> 00:21:03,932
[sighs]
352
00:21:03,932 --> 00:21:08,895
What General Mouthwashington
taught me most of all was courage.
353
00:21:17,195 --> 00:21:20,532
[Harriet] At first,
it took courage to go to the dentist.
354
00:21:31,167 --> 00:21:36,256
But there are far scarier things in life
than the dentist, like Marion Hawthorne...
355
00:21:37,048 --> 00:21:38,341
[blows raspberry]
356
00:21:38,925 --> 00:21:40,385
[blows raspberry]
357
00:21:40,385 --> 00:21:44,389
...and growing up,
and saying goodbye to the things you love.
358
00:21:44,389 --> 00:21:45,932
[shouts] Ooh.
359
00:21:46,975 --> 00:21:49,728
Dr. Hawthorne, I'm ready.
360
00:21:51,688 --> 00:21:52,814
[Harriet] But today,
361
00:21:52,814 --> 00:21:55,233
General Mouthwashington
helped me understand
362
00:21:55,233 --> 00:21:57,193
that you don't have to be afraid.
363
00:21:57,193 --> 00:21:59,571
- You can be bold and brave...
- [drill buzzes]
364
00:22:01,114 --> 00:22:05,785
...because nothing is truly gone
if its story lives on.
365
00:22:18,632 --> 00:22:21,885
In case you're thinking I sold
Mouthwashington to the tooth fairy,
366
00:22:21,885 --> 00:22:23,887
not a chance.
367
00:22:24,387 --> 00:22:28,308
I told Dr. Hawthorne
to donate his body to science.
368
00:22:28,808 --> 00:22:31,019
- It's what the general woulda wanted...
- [gurgles]
369
00:22:31,019 --> 00:22:32,938
...to keep up the good bite.
370
00:22:32,938 --> 00:22:34,022
[spits]
371
00:22:34,022 --> 00:22:35,106
Huh.
372
00:22:38,610 --> 00:22:41,029
Welcome to the Union, new guy.